#desire fanfic

[zorawitch]

sandman friends. somewhere out there in the depths of ao3. there is a fanfiction. no i don't remember the name. it is about desire going through a delirium-esque transformation into a creature of pure apathy that i believe is called dissatisfaction. has anyone seen it.

[brw]

My least favourite type of internet person is the person who claims fanfic is over thousands of years old or whatever. I understand we like to joke but fanfiction is fundamentally tied to fandom culture and is a very specific way of engaging with media. Religious texts based off other religious texts is not fanfiction and it is worrying the only way you can justify your interest is by comparing the two. I promise you you don't have to reinvent the wheel to write fanfic you can just do that but we don't have to say "Shakespeare wrote fanfiction about Richard III", there was not a Richard III fandom in 1592, that was called the divine right of kings.

[needypisces]

there's only so much a body can work out, a body can do

Art Donaldson was exhausted.

He was playing tennis for hours a day, exams were coming up, and with Patrick calling from a new time zone every week, he was barely getting any sleep. Even sliding facedown onto the bed next to you offered little relief for his aching muscles.

You let out a sympathetic cluck at his frustrated sigh, dropping your book and winding a hand into his shaggy hair to scratch reassuringly at his scalp. “Poor baby,” you said. “You’re wound up way too tight.”

He didn’t reply, but you could hear his exhale into the mattress. “You need to relax.” You continued, twisting a loose curl around your finger.

“I’m not so good at that.” He admitted in a muffled voice.

“You just need some help.” You paused for a moment, eyeing the tension in his shoulders, the slight arch of his back. “Why don’t you lie down?”

Art tilted his chin up to look at you. “I am lying down.”

“On your back.”

He scanned your eyes briefly before obeying, shirt riding up his toned stomach in the process. “Like this?”

“Yeah, just like that.” You agreed. You sat beside him and he shifted slightly to maintain better eye contact, bringing up an arm to rest behind his head. The movement drew your gaze to his taut bicep, and you couldn’t resist bending down to bite it, just barely hard enough to sting.

You smiled into Art’s skin at his surprised inhale, but you were the one caught off guard when his other arm swept you seamlessly into his lap.

“Hey!” You said, sitting up straight. “Hands to yourself.” He pouted, hand still gripping your hip, but you weren’t joking. When you started to lift yourself off, he caved.

“Okay, I’m sorry.” He said, propping himself up with both arms now. “You’re in charge.”

“Don’t forget it.” You warned. He watched, chastised, as you dropped your own hands to the hem of his shirt, pulling it up until it bunched at his collarbone. Then, finally, you leaned down to kiss him.

Art was a needy kisser, always waiting for you to guide him, chasing your mouth with his own any time you tried to pull back, whimpering when you licked at the inside of his mouth. You loved kissing him, loved how much it worked him up. He was still a teenage boy, after all.

Once you could feel him properly hard beneath you, you began to descend, teeth scraping his jawbone, his collarbone, his nipple, followed soothingly by your tongue each time. Art’s abdomen was tense beneath your mouth as you pressed open-mouthed kisses to his ribs, his navel, his hips.

The tip of his cock was already sticky when you pulled down his boxers and grasped him in your fist, and you wasted no time in leaning down to tongue his slit. Normally you’d tease him much longer, make him beg, but right now, you just wanted to make him feel better. Art could hardly believe his luck.

You pumped the base of him with one hand and cupped his balls with the other as you suckled at his head. A whine escaped from high in the back of Art’s throat, and it only encouraged you to swallow more of him down.

“Oh,” he gasped, hips bucking into your mouth. “Fuck, please, please.” You moved a hand to rub his thigh reassuringly, a wordless promise, and lowered yourself further until your nose nestled against his pelvis. Art was panting desperately above you, the noises so sweet you couldn’t stop yourself from grinding down against his leg. He moaned at the feeling of your wetness, which only spurred you on more. For a while, the only sounds in the room were your slurps and gags against Art's cries.

Before long, you could feel the familiar signs of his impending orgasm, and you popped off. It took Art a moment too long to comprehend that you were speaking, too mesmerized by the string of drool connecting you to his dick.

“Where do you want to come, baby?” You asked again, hand continuing your work. “Hmm?”

“Is this a trick question?” He asked between shallow breaths.

You couldn’t help but laugh, and Art’s chest flushed pink. “No.” You promised, ducking to mouth at his balls. “Anywhere you want. Do you want to come in my mouth? On my face, or on my tits?” His face was beautifully unforgettable when you glanced up, eyes dazed and cheeks glowing as he tried to form a thought. “Come on, princess, use your words.”

At that, Art’s cock twitched in your grasp and you took him back into your mouth, tongue working at the underside. “On your face,” he finally said above you, and your stomach swelled. “Wanna come on your face.”

“Okay, baby,” you murmured. “Anything for you.” You pulled off long enough to soak two fingers in your spit, simultaneously gulping him back down and pressing the pads of your fingers behind his balls. Art clenched down and let out a strangled moan as you rubbed over his hole. You teased him with the tip of a finger, nudging at the muscle but not quite penetrating him, soaking up the mewls that fell from his mouth.

“Fuck, baby, I’m gonna- you’re gonna make me come,” he panted. His thighs were quivering; he was so close, the tension ready to drain from his body. You gave an encouraging hum, swallowing around his cock, and Art’s gasp broke into a sob as he came. You kept him in your mouth for a moment, letting yourself swallow just a little before pulling off to let him splatter onto your face. Art’s whimpers were delicious as he watched himself coat your swollen lips, your long lashes.

“Good boy,” you cooed, fist still working his cock even as he began to flinch from the overstimulation. “That’s it, does that feel better?”

Art’s head was tipped back as he struggled to catch his breath, but even still, his eyes refused to move from the mess on your face. You kept your eyes on his as you lowered your mouth once more, lapping at the dribble of cum down his cock. He started to whine in protest, it was too much, but you took pity and let him go, rocking back on your heels.

“So much better,” he whispered. “That felt so good, I needed it, thank you."

“Good.” You said, licking your lips. “That’s what I like to hear.”

[moonyflesh]

dating Logan Howlett would include…

WARNINGS: smutty. p in v, oral sex, fingering, breeding kink, orgasm teasing/control, mentions of aggressive/risky sex, (language, obviously), etc. - [🔞]

CHARACTERS: James “Logan” Howlett (MARVEL/X-MEN/WOLVERINE)

🐾 .*.. 🩹

- possessive smacks on the ass when you pass him in the hall.

- all talk, but no bite (he would never actually hurt you).

- routine scalp massages (on both ends), usually ending in you both being passed out on the other’s bed.

- having to label what food is yours, or he will eat it.

- constantly scolding him for his chapped lips…where he continuously looses the chapsticks you graciously lend him (he always buys you more).

- playful banter that usually ends with you bent over whatever flat surface is nearby.

- having to get used to loud chewing. i mean, it’s Logan. what do you expect?

- not much physical show of affection in public- that’s reserved for behind closed doors. (an occasional press of his lips to your forehead, or his hand on the small of your back is as far as he’s willing to put on display for the student’s prying eyes).

- thriving off of each other’s warmth at night- tangled up in each other under some thin duvet.

- country, bluegrass, and old as fuck music. don’t you dare even think about turning on “that shitty music you like so much” around him.

- being turned on by your makeup on him in some way— lipstick prints smeared along the collar of his white t-shirt- your mascara running down your face and smearing onto his fingers when he wipes it off.

- (^) just you making an absolute mess on him in general. he fucking loves it.

- needing to take sharp intakes of breath in between his kisses, since he physically can hold his breath for much longer than the “average mutant”.

- rough, meaningful sex. there is no such thing as a ‘quickie’ in his book. he wants to savor your moments of vulnerability.

- more teeth than tongue. he wants to feel how you squirm under him when his canines sink into your lips, shoulders, and inner thighs.

- (^) lovebites and hickeys. you’re not allowed to leave the house unless there’s something that’s marking you as taken. as his.

- wearing his clothes when he’s gone for long periods of time.

- long motorcycle rides, usually at night. (he makes you wear a helmet and plenty of protective leather, much to his enjoyment).

- soaking in your scent. he always knows when your needy. he can smell it on you.

- oh, and he smells like cedar wood and pine. Maybe a bit of cigar smoke- his natural sweat smell he can’t seem to get rid of? Something Iike that.

- (^) him going absolutely feral when he can smell himself on you- his cologne, cigars- just his general aura on you is such a massive turn on for him.

- lots of loving nips and kisses, though. constantly has his lips pressed against the nape of your neck or crown of your skull.

- sleeps with you in his arms. no way in hell you’re allowed to wake up before him.

- face sitting. he wants every pound of you on his mouth and nose, his arms wrapped up and around your thighs, pushing your cunt into his tongue.

- wanting to feel good too. no matter how hard he’s been going down on you, he wants release, too.

- praise. lots of shrewd language and name-calling.

><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

“fuck, that’s my good fucking girl- you’re doing so good, sweetheart- so pretty all sweaty and wet cuzzah’ me, huh?”

><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

- face fucking. he’ll stop no matter how close he is to his peak if you need him to, but he wants it so far down your throat. and you better swallow every last drop.

- breeding kink? idk i just feel like he’s super into seeing you carry his kid (only when you’re ready, though. he of all people knows what a big deal pregnancy is).

- decent aftercare. he at least puts some amount of effort into it; probably brings you a glass of lukewarm water, a damp towel from his bathroom, maybe one of his t-shirts if he thinks of it.

- expect to wait a while for him to say “i love you” back. he’s been hurt. too many times. he loves you, he breathes you, he craves you. he just doesn’t know if he’s ready to actually admit that to himself yet, let alone to you.

[bloominglegumes]

i've been digging around for jazz-and/or-prowl-centred mystery fics and this one was so so excellent to me,, the atmosphere, the details of the environment, prowl's perspective was so nicely done the writing was so juicy i love them being best friends feeling safe together i love the idea of robot ghosts

[ellieputellas]

pretend | alexia putellas x reader

Alexia contemplates her feelings as you pretend a drunken kiss between you two never happened.

contains: angst, some making out, barçafemeni!reader, avoidant!reader, just a lot of angst tbh | word count: 2k+

a/n: not proofread, just wrote this cause i couldnt sleep and was listening to lizzy mcalpine's hate to be lame which gave me this idea

it's always on the tip of my tongue but i stop myself from saying it tell myself it's not the right time or something dumb

The last night of the Champion's League celebration was supposed to be just like any other victory party—loud, drunk, messy. On nights like this, it was natural to make a fool of yourself.

Alexia was never immune to the drunken stupidity — the typical drunken dancing and singing, foolish antics that got the team laughing. (In one victory party, Alexia found herself dancing with someone else's sports bra wrapped around on her head.)

But on that particular night, her drunken act of stupidity wasn't just loud karaoke or making a fool of herself. No, it was way different.

At some point, during the night, you two had gotten drunk and began grinding on each other at the dance floor. It was normal for teammates to get a bit touchy during parties so no one bat an eye but Alexia knew this thing happening between you two was different.

It started with playful dancing then you somehow found a way to plant a few kisses on her neck. It didn’t take long until you two ended up stumbling into the vacant restroom, kissing each other desperately.

Some kind of tension has always lingered between the two of you before but Alexia always chalked it up to the two of you being newly single. She always brushed it off, thinking it might just be her reading into things. Afer all, you have always been her type and she figured she might be interpreting your dynamic through wishful thinking.

But that night, that small tension she felt burst into something more, and she understood that this meant it wasn't just her who felt attraction towards the other.

She felt your hands desperately cling onto her as you locked lips. Your tongue glided on her bottom lip before ultimately finding its way into her mouth. You took turns pinning each other against the flimsy walls of the cramped stall.

Alexia's hand has found it way to your neck, gently tilting your head up with it before pressing her mouth against your neck to kiss, lick, and bite at you. You gasped in satisfaction as the taller girl kissed your neck.

You grabbed her face again to kiss her deeper, more intensely. Alexia felt that this was the type of kiss that could lead to something more; the likelihood of you crossing that line increasing with every minute that passed.

You gently pushed her off of you, as you tried to catch a breath. Your eyes remained locked as you stayed within close proximity. After a while, you noticed the hunger in Alexia's eyes simmer down into something more... soft and intimate.

This time, Alexia gently touched your face and moved to capture your lips again but this time, you looked away and avoided her kiss. You sighed before hurriedly unlocking the stall, walking out the restroom, and leaving Alexia all alone without even a goodbye.

Alexia felt dumbfounded. She thought that this kiss was your way of addressing the tension, a way of telling her that maybe you felt attracted to her too. But with the sudden exit, she began to doubt herself.

She wanted to talk to you about it the next time you saw each other but it became immediately evident to her that you were set on pretending like nothing happened.

You still joked with her in training, still bantered with her, tell stories like normal. You acted exactly like you did before; it was as if she dreamt up the kiss.

She played along like nothing had shifted, like your kiss had been meaningless. She even laughed at your jokes during training. But every word felt like a lie, every shared laughter felt like a stab.

In her mind, she wished you'd at least act different. She would rather you hated her or avoided her, something—anything to confirm that there was something real, something more.

But you acted like it was nothing.

She felt like she was going crazy, even doubting her own sanity at some point. She spent the past few months trying to forget it ever happened. But the more she tried, the more it hurt her. Because how could you pretend that all of that was nothing... when it felt like everything for her.

But then you kiss me like you do And we're right back where we started from

It was Pina’s birthday.

Alexia initially didn't want to go. It was in the middle of the season and she knew that the team captain being there meant everyone would be too hesitant and shy to drink, knowing she was around.

But she knew how Pina was, and she knew Pina would pester her endlessly if she didn't at least make an appearance.

So, she did. She went to the place late and much to her surprise, most of the team was behaving. A few of the players were nursing a bottle of beer but nothing excessive. She figured she must have done something right for her teammates to be so well-disciplined even without her hovering around them.

Well... she thought that until she saw you.

Of course, she's drunk. She thought to herself.

You were already tipsy, practically glowing, and laughing too loudly. The sight of you sent a jolt of something unfamiliar through her.

You had your arms wrapped around Caro, who was trying too hard to help you sober up by making you drink from a bottle of water. Alexia sighed and made her way to save Caro from your drunkenness.

Caro gave her a thankful look as she took over in aiding to you. She let you drape your arms around her as she wiped the stray hairs that stuck to your face.

"In the middle of the season?" She asked you in a stern voice. "Really?"

You frowned at her. "You wouldn't get it."

Alexia just sighed as she continued what Caro was doing, desperately trying to get you to sober up. "Did something happen?"

You stayed silent but you were too easy to read when you were drunk. Your glazed expression gave away that you were going through something. You still had an arm wrapped around Alexia, as if to keep yourself balanced, but you were also trying to avert your gaze away from her.

Alexia sighed. "I should take you home."

You bit your lip but you nodded. Alexia sighed and held your waist as you kept an arm around her; she was afraid if she let go, you'd fall over.

The car ride was silent. She wanted to talk to you about why you were getting irresponsibly drunk, why you seemed upset and... why you acted like your kiss never happened. But instead, she stayed silent, and as did you.

Alexia pulled up to your apartment building. After she parked, you unclasped your seatbelts but neither of you made a move to exit the car.

Alexia sighed. "Do you wanna talk... about anything?"

You shifted your gaze towards her, taking in how pretty she looked tonight. She was wearing a leather jacket on top of a cropped shirt, revealing a sliver of her abdomen. Your eyes now fluttered to her face. You took in her warm eyes, her nose, her lips. She looked so besutiful even under the dim lighting. You thought, fuck, why does she have to be so gorgeous?

You hummed. "I'm sorry I took you away from the party... especially since you look so good tonight."

Alexia started growing anxious as you said those words. "Well, I didn't really plan on going anyway..." Alexia said.

Drunkenly, you reached out to cup her face and guiding it upward so she'd meet your gaze. You stayed that way for a bit, just looking at each other's eyes. Until finally, you couldn't take it.

You leaned in and captured her lips in a kiss. It was more gentle than before, more intentional. As you pulled away, you studied her expression but Alexia just looked pained.

She sighed and looked away, causing your hand on her cheek to drop. She took a deep breath as she gripped the steering wheel with her hands and rested her head on top of it.

Emotions were overwhelming her. This was the long overdue confirmation she wanted from you so bad yet... it felt so wrong.

After a minute, Alexia finally spoke. "Why?"

"Huh? Why what?" You asked back.

She lifted her head slightly and locked eyes with you again. "Just... why?"

You sighed. "I don't know... I just want to kiss you."

Alexia looked exasperated. She took a moment to think. Do you remember last time? Why did you act like it never happened? Why do you want to kiss me now? Why do you only want to kiss me when you're drunk? Do I mean something? Do the kisses mean something? Do you... like me like I like you?

She had a million questions flying around her head but she settled on one. "Tell me honestly. Do you remember the last time we kissed?" She locked eyes with you and this time, you could see pain behind them. She tried to be firm with the way she asked but the vulnerability seeped through.

You blinked at her. “I think about it all the time,” you admitted before you could even consider lying; your inebriation made you too honest.

Alexia chest tightened as she felt hurt by the admission. Am I not supposed to be happy... that she thinks about it too like I do?

Before she could react, you were trying to lean in again as your face cupped her cheek, trying to kiss her. And that's when Alexia snapped into clarity.

No. You were drunk. This wasn’t... healthy. She couldn’t let herself do this again, not when everything between you was so confusing, so undefined.

“No,” Alexia whispered, gently pushing you away, though her hands shook with the desire to do exactly the opposite.

You looked at her with an expression that could only read as upset to Alexia but she tried to ignore it as she unlocked your car door. "I think you should go."

You stayed steady for a minute, twiddling your thumbs then staring at her but she kept her head low, trying so hard not to look at you until you finally stepped out without another word.

Hate to admit but it might be true Hate to admit but I think you knew Hate to be lame but I might love you

After that night, as expected, you didn't acknowledge the kiss. But this time, you started acting cold.

No more joking around. No more banter. You'd be laughing it up with the other Barça girls but as soon as Alexia came over, you'd bail and make an excuse to avoid her.

It was killing her, just being like this. Mapi had taken notice and pulled Alexia aside to ask if she was alright, which Alexia just hesitantly nodded.

Mapi didn't believe it for a moment. "Is it because of..." Mapi trailed off as she discreetly turned her gaze towards you as you were busy on your phone in the locker room.

Alexia sighed and said nothing but that was enough confirmation for Mapi. She sighed. "You need to talk it out," She said. "It's kinda affecting your dynamic on and off the pitch."

Alexia knew Mapi was right. Not only was it taking a toll on her emotions to be dealing with this awkward tension and silent avoidance, it wasn't long before shit gets worse and the team performance is affected. If it was only affecting her, she would have dropped the whole issue but she knew this was beyond you and her.

She caught you before training the next day, her voice sharp but shaking as she confronted you. "Can we talk?"

You sighed and nodded. "Yeah, Capi?"

She winced at the nickname, knowing that it was your tactic to distance yourself from her. Just another subtle way of deflecting.

“I know you feel the same way,” Alexia blurted it out, her words tumbling out too quickly. She regretted being so outright but she also no longer wanted to waste time. She had to do what she had to do.

Alexia sighed as she ran her hand through her hair. “And... it hurt when you acted like nothing happened. Like it didn’t matter.” Her chest heaved with the weight of everything she hadn’t said.

You stayed silent which just forced Alexia into doing all the talking. "I don't know what's going on with you but... why me? Why are you roping me into this?"

"It's nothing." You muttered.

Alexia grew frustrated. "Bullshit."

"What do you want me to do, Alexia?" Your eyes finally met hers.

"I don't know." She groaned. "Admit you like me too... or even just admit you kissed me. Tell me why you did. Tell me if it mattered. Fuck, I'd settle with you telling me it was a mistake. I just... need to hear from you that..."

"Nothing happened,” you said firmly, almost as if to convince yourself as much as her.

Alexia’s heart sank. She was there just begging for you to admit it did, even if you say it was a mistake; she just needed to hear it from you. Instead, you denied her again.

“But—”

“Drop it,” you snapped, turning quickly, rushing away before she could say anything more.

She watched you go, her hands shaking at her sides. There was nothing more she could do. She was left standing there, confused and hurt, unable to understand why it hurt so much. How could you pretend it meant nothing when everything inside her screamed that it meant everything?

Do I love her? Do I need her? Do I want her? Do I care enough to say That I love her, that I need her? 'Cause I don't but I wanna feel okay

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months and Alexia still couldn't forget what happened.

Your dynamic on the pitch suffered for a bit but it recovered. And pretty soon, you were acting normal again around her.

As if nothing, nothing at all, had happened.

For a while, Alexia had convinced herself she had moved on from it. It was just two kisses, she told herself on multiple occasions. You don't even like her that much.

But there were nights when she couldn't help but be consumed with confusion and frustration. She hated how it happened—how you treated her, how you pretended nothing was real.

On most days, she hated you. She acted normal around you, sure, but there was an added layer now. Everything was more guarded. Even if she asked you often how you were and laughed at your jokes, your relationship was hurt and it could never go back to how it was.

And even if she did despise you for what you did... she still couldn’t stop the way her heart raced when she saw you. She couldn’t shut off the part of her that still hoped that maybe, one day, you'd admit to her that it did happen and maybe that you feel a certain softness for her too.

But she knew it wasn't happening any time soon and now, all she can do is what you do best — pretend.

[girllblogging777]

𝐶𝑅𝐼𝑆𝑃𝑌 𝐶𝑂𝑁𝑉𝐸𝑅𝑆𝐴𝑇𝐼𝑂𝑁𝑆

↳ bf!mattheo riddle (british) x fem!reader (american)

↳ 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡 : 0.3k

𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦 : when cuddling with your boyfriend turns into a debate over british and american slang

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

it was one of those lazy saturday nights in october, where neither of you had anything to do. no assignments to finish, no tests to study for. just you and mattheo, curled up in your bed, the world outside completely forgotten. the fairy lights above you were the only thing lighting your dorm, and the rain outside was the only sound that could be heard.

you were warm and comfortable under your shared blanket, limbs tangled together like they had been a thousand times before. there was a nearly empty bag of snacks between you, and mattheo was laying on his side, propped up on one elbow, reaching into it lazily.

“these crisps are bloody good,” he said, taking a bite, his smirk widening as he caught you staring at him.

you groaned, rolling your eyes for what felt like the hundredth time. “matt, seriously? chips. they’re called chips. we’ve had this argument a million times.”

he chuckled, clearly enjoying how easily he could get a rise out of you. his hand slid to your waist, fingers tracing lazy circles over your skin. “nope. chips are what you call fries. these,” he lifted the bag as if to prove his point, “are crisps. just admit it. you’re wrong.”

you turned your head to glare at him, though there was a playful glint in your eyes. “you know, for someone who insists on calling them crisps, you sure eat a lot of chips.”

he laughed, stealing another from the bag. “doesn’t mean i agree with your blasphemous name for them.”

groaning, you pushed him lightly and stretched out, throwing your legs over his. “fries are fries, chips are chips. you’re the one who’s confused, or maybe just stupid.”

he shook his head, like he couldn’t believe how stubborn you were. “how many times do i have to explain this? it’s not hard, love. chips are the thick ones, like with fish and chips. what you’re holding? that’s a crisp.”

you snorted, deliberately taking a loud bite of one, making him groan. “fries are fries, chips are chips,” you repeated, just to get under his skin.

mattheo ran a hand through his curls, looking at you like you were absolutely crazy. “you’re mental, you know that? you make no sense.” but even though he was annoyed, there was this softness in his voice, this look in his eyes, like he couldn’t help but smile at you, all comfortable in his hoodie, your hair a mess from laying around all day, cheeks warm and pink from laughing.

you leaned into him, resting your head on his shoulder, your body pressed against his. “i’m not the one who’s confused about food, mattheo.”

he sighed, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, pulling you even closer, pressing his face into your neck like he needed to breathe you in. “how did i end up with someone so wrong, yet so cute?”

you laughed, your fingers finding their way into his messy hair as you tugged on it gently. his hand slid down to your waist, squeezing you playfully. “i’m definitely gonna have to educate you on the difference between crisps and chips. i can’t have my girl sounding so american all the time.”

you slapped him lightly on the chest, making him chuckle. “i am american, you idiot.”

“yeah, yeah,” he muttered beforeleaning in to kiss you, his voice dropping to that soft teasing tone that always made your heart skip. “but you could at least try to speak proper english.”

you rolled your eyes and smiled into the kiss, pulling back just enough to whisper against his lips, “fries are fries. chips are chips.” mattheo groaned, leaning back to look at you with fake annoyance. “you’re impossible.”

but even as he complained, you could see the smile tugging at his lips, the warmth in his eyes, and you knew, without a doubt that he wouldn’t have you any other way.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

a/n : another scenario i got from character ai, cause i accidentally said chips and the mattheo got mad (i’m neither british nor american guys, sorry)

tag list (comment if you wanna be added) @ilovematteoxx @tateshifts @redeemingvillains @helendeath @jolly4holly @larmesdevanille @dexoq @shiftingwithmars @shiftingwithleah @fbvreadingblog @moonlightreader649 @bellatrix-lestrange5 @sp7-mr @sunkissedscribbles @chelawrites @myunperfektstorys @iris-qt @yikesitslush @clar2aa @deadsnakey @deadghosy @slut-for-fictional-men @romantasyreader28 @witchsrecs @mattiesgf

[firelilyfox]

Power over you

Dune: Paul Atreides x female reader

Warnings: NSFW / going down on her / cursing / explicit se&ual actions

Paul likes to be in charge

Words: 1k

_______________________

His touch leaves your skin burning. 

Your heartbeat doubled when he grabbed you by the neck, forcing you to look him directly in the eyes. Such lovely eyes, yet so full of a dark desire. The same desire you feel in every fiber of your being. 

„I’ve been imagining this the whole day. You are driving me insane, love.“ His thumb gently touching your lips to part them a little bit. Paul thinks about so many things those lips of yours could do and what he would do in return for you. 

You give him a cheeky grin. „That was the plan, Atreides. See it as a challenge on how long you could hold yourself back.“ You let your hands explore his tense chest. Feel every muscle moving under his thin shirt, as you touch him. The power you have over him makes the desire even more intense. His eyes darkened as your fingertips reach the waistband of his pants and his breathing just got heavier. There is no doubt about how much Paul wants you right now. The thought of you doing some bad things were in his mind for hours, so much that he had trouble on focusing on the important meeting he had with Stillgar and some other Fremen … he don’t even remembered what it was about. Paul was only thinking of you, being willingly under his control. So that he could do whatever he desires to. 

„Even if I wanted to hold myself back… I wouldn’t be able to“, his voice was not more than a breathy whisper. Paul caged you with his body against the wall. Your back fully pressed against hard stone, but you couldn’t care less. „I’m so fucking weak when it comes to you.“ 

He kissed you with a hunger that can not be satisfied. He would never get enough of this. Paul knew he would never get enough of you. His strong hands reached beneath your thighs, lifting you up so that you could wrap your legs around his waist. A little moan escaped your mouth and it made him grin a winning smile. Paul knows exactly how much you wanted him. And it made him proud like nothing else could do.

You could feel his length through the fabric of his pants, making you even more impatient to feel him all over you … and deep inside. Your fingers clawing onto his back, probably leaving marks on it. Paul was kissing you until you run out of breath, then moving his lips to your throat, making it even harder for you to concentrate. He knows all your weak spots and how to use them against you. 

His hands exploring your thighs and hips. Holding you with a strong grip so that you couldn’t escape him at any chance. Not that you wanted to. Your fingers running through his dark curls, pulling it gently. He growls. Paul is not the only one who knows how to use weak spots. Now he lost all hesitation that was left to this point. He tightens his grip around your hips, moving you from the wall to the next table. A surprised smile shows on your lips and he kissed it like he wanted to make it his own. 

You impatiently pulling his shirt until he lets go of you for a split second so you could drag it over his head. His bare chest and the defined abs came to light and you lose no time to let your fingers explore every inch of his body. You can feel him shivering beneath your touch. Paul decides that it was his turn now. He loves watching you enjoying your power over him, but to see you loosing your mind because of him and what he would do is even more of a turn on for him. 

He pulls the straps of your dress down, so that the useless fabric is now laying around your waist. His eyes wandering down your body, admiring every part of it. Even the scars from the many battles you fought. Some of them by his side. 

„You are so fucking beautiful, my love.“ 

You wanted to say something, but suddenly his lips were on your collarbone and the ability to form words vanished from your brain with every kiss he places on your skin, making his way down to your weakest spot. His tongue begins to move and a sharp scream bursts out of your chest. You grab his hair to keep him right there. Nothing in the world could bring Paul to go somewhere else. He enjoyed this way to much. Feeling you loose control. Tasting how much you want him. One of his hands pressing on your lower belly to make the incredible feeling even more intense. Every part of his body was screaming for you, but he wanted to make sure that you get what you deserve first. 

The moment Paul was using his fingers to help his tongue was the exact moment your world shattered into thousand pieces. You couldn’t hold your own body up, so you laid your head back and let the feeling of satisfaction take control over you. Your thighs shaking uncontrollably as Paul shoves you over the cliff. 

He loved that. He would fucking kill somebody for the satisfaction of making you shake like that. 

Slowly he comes back to his feet. Pulling your hips to the edge of the table. Your vision was a little blurry, but you could see that beautiful, dark smile he gave you. Paul placed a soft kiss on your lips, as he shoved himself deep inside you. Your fingernails scratching the skin of his back. Paul moans against your lips and begins to move his hips against yours. The rhythm started slowly but became faster with every thrust. Your legs wrapped tightly around his waist, his arms holding you so very close to him and the both of you moving in perfect harmony. 

As both of you reached the climax, out of breath and sweaty all you hear, was the wild beat of your own heart, pounding at the same rhythm as Pauls. He leaned his forehead against yours, eyes closed and lost in the moment. 

„I love you, y/n“, Paul whispered. 

You kiss him softly. „And i love you, Paul.“ 

_______________________

Thanks for reading! Comments, Likes & Reblogs are very welcome (but no stealing pls) <3

[honeyedmiller]

A Burning Desire part five

firefighter!joel miller x f!reader

series masterlist | main masterlist

rating: 18+, minors dni

warnings: joel miller au, explicit content (smut– unprotected piv, oral [m & f receiving], fingering), lots and lots of (unsaid) feelings, angst (had to do it to ‘em one time [for the plot]), no use of y/n.

word count: 9.1k

synopsis: after spending an incredible weekend with joel, you finally realize how you truly feel about him—but with those feelings comes an ever-dreaded skepticism, which has you teetering on the edge of telling him or not.

​​​​​​There’s something about waking up in the arms of someone you really like.

And then there’s something about waking up in the arms of someone you love. 

It’s a warm feeling; something that’s nearly indescribable as the butterflies rumble deep in your belly. It feels like silent devotion, being wrapped in strong arms with a warm chest pressed tightly against your bare back. 

You didn’t think you’d ever get to experience this feeling again—but this time, certainty wraps securely around your heart and you feel so safe. You feel at ease. You feel like this is where you’re meant to be. 

And hell, it really is. You’re finally letting your walls crumble, torn down brick-by-brick by the very man whose heart beats steadily against your back. 

You’re in love with Joel Miller. 

Your gaze flicks to the digital clock on your nightstand. It was early, but you were buzzing with too much anticipation and need to even think about going back to sleep. Ever so slowly, you rotate your body in his arms so you’re face-to-face with the beautiful man, trying your best not to wake him from his deep slumber. You admire his features like this; he’s so relaxed and at peace. The usual crease between his brows when he’s deep in thought or being stern about something is nearly nonexistent. You lean your head up and kiss him softly in that area, moving to the crook of his nose next. 

His eyes twitch in the slightest, but besides that he’s like a log next to you, so you continue the featherlight assault of your lips on his warm skin: his cheek, the corner of his mouth, his forehead, and finally, his lips. 

His body slowly wakes before his mind does, and you can feel his hard-on against your thigh. You softly giggle to yourself and admire that he’s so receptive to your touch and kisses even while he’s still nearly fully asleep. 

You wanted nothing more than to wake him with your mouth taking his cock, but you haven’t crossed that threshold yet, nor has it been discussed between the two of you. So, you opt for continuously kissing his bare skin, moving down to his sturdy chest that’s dusted with a patch of hair. 

He groans softly, body twitching now as he slowly peels his eyes open. You rest your chin on his sternum as his beautiful brown eyes land on you, taking in the sight before him. 

“Good morning, cowboy,” you say, tracing light patterns on his pec with the tip of your index finger. 

“Mmm,” he hums, “Mornin’ sweetheart. What time is it?” 

He rubs his palms into his eyes, trying his hardest to fully wake himself up. 

“Eight. Breakfast with the newlyweds is at ten,” you explain, grateful in this moment that your sister loves to sleep in when she can. 

“Good. Means we can stay in bed a little longer,” he muses sleepily, head lolling back onto the plush pillows. 

“Mmmhmmmm,” you exaggerate your hum, still tracing patterns on his chest. 

He quirks an eyebrow at you, a smirk forming on his lips as if he can already sense what you want to do. 

“Also gives me more time to love on you,” he says, tilting your chin up so your lips can meet his. 

You gaze at him longingly, pressing another kiss to his chest—right over the strong beat of his heart. 

“It’s my turn to love on you, cowboy,” you say. You don’t offer an explanation, but you begin to trail featherlight kisses down his chest and torso, moving your body down the mattress. You stop just above his navel, looking up at him with a daring glint in your eye. 

He reaches down to cradle your cheek in his palm, rubbing his thumb back and forth across your skin lovingly. 

“You don’t have to, baby,” his voice is soft, but with the way his cock looks right now—all veiny and hard with pre come leaking from the tip—you were nearly salivating. You wanted to ravish this man head-to-toe, starting with this. 

“But I want to,” you simply say, shuffling down a little further. Joel deserves to feel the same pleasure he laid upon you just hours prior. 

Something of a soft groan escapes his throat, and that only makes this carnal need, a desire in you, that much stronger to please him. 

You gently grab his pulsing, silky flesh before giving it a couple of strokes. A sigh evades Joel’s lips, brows threading together before tossing his arm over his eyes, breathing becoming ragged. 

You lean forward now, swirling your tongue around the tip before sucking on it gently. Joel inhales sharply, obviously trying to keep himself in control, but this is a battle you both know he wouldn’t win. 

Your mouth is so soft and warm as you work around him, taking him in deeper. You keep a steady pace with the hand that’s stroking the rest of him that isn’t in your mouth, and you can’t help but lick the full underside of his cock. 

“Holy shit, baby—” Joel breathily moans, and you decide to take things a step further by dragging your tongue down even further, paying special attention to his balls. Joel’s body jolts at the sensation, and the most guttural growl evades his chest and reverberates off of the hotel room walls.

You might be enjoying this too much as you lap him up, stroking his cock in tandem with the movements of your tongue. You finally let up on him, moving your mouth back to the heavy, silky flesh that pulsates in the palm of your hand. 

You kiss his tip one more time before taking him as far down as you can, swallowing around him. You set a final steady pace then, bobbing your head up and down on him while using your hand once more to stroke what your mouth can’t reach. 

You can’t help but close your eyes in bliss and relish every pass you make, knowing you get to be the one to make him feel good. You get to see him like this—bed head, stuttered breath, naked body, quivering under your touch and sweet mouth. It really couldn’t get any better than this, you think. 

And you realize, you really are in love with this man. Every single inch of him, inside and out. A warm feeling wraps around your heart and squeezes, butterflies rumbling in your tummy for the millionth time. There really is no man like him, and you often think to yourself how lucky you are that he accepted your advances at the coffee shop. 

“Fuck, darlin’, right there, right there,” he’s panting now, and you can’t help but open your eyes and enjoy the way the sun shines on his chest. His skin is coated with a sheen of sweat, making him glisten in such an ethereal way. Even the top of his brow is perspiring, despite the temperature in the room to be fairly chilly. One of your hands lands gently onto his thigh, lightly scratching his hot skin with your nails. 

A groan rumbles from his chest once again, and it makes the pulsing between your legs ten times worse. You moan around him, dragging your hand that’s on his thigh down until it’s between your legs, fingers collecting your own slick before you begin to gently rub your clit. 

You gasp at the sensation, not expecting to be nearly as sensitive as you are, and Joel’s head snaps up when he hears how wet you are. You don’t relent on him, though. You take him deeper into your mouth, trying your best to swallow around him as your other free hand massages his balls. 

“Wh-What are you doin’?” His voice is desperate, strained and gravelly, and he can barely keep his eyes open at this point. He’s a mess in the most delicious way possible, and you hum around him, pleased with what you see. 

Your hand is doing a half-assed job as trying to pleasure your own self. You know damn well Joel’s mouth or fingers would please you ten times more—hell, especially his cock. He proved that to you last night, and he had plans in mind to do it once again. 

Joel’s body goes rigid and your hand leaves its position between your thighs, and you place it back on his own. He doesn’t hesitate to grab your hand and intertwine his fingers with yours while he’s frantically mumbling under his breath, clearly desperate for release. 

You don’t break eye contact with him now as you only move your mouth to his tip, swirling your tongue deviously slow around him. Joel twitches and it’s like his body can’t help it—he comes on the spot. No warning or anything, but you take everything that he gives you onto your tongue graciously before swallowing. 

You let up on him, giving his tip one more kiss. His body shivers at the sensation, and you continue to kiss his thighs, up to his torso, chest, neck, and cheek. 

He’s still trying to steady his breathing while he grips your thighs so you’re straddling him, and it takes everything in you not to drag your needy, dripping cunt onto his length. You want to moan just at the thought of it, but you’re holding on to the last bit of self control you have, which really isn’t much. 

“Hi,” you say, and you can’t help but smirk down at him. 

“Didn’t know you had such a dirty mouth, sweetheart,” Joel’s heart rate is slowly steadying itself, but the sight of you on top of him like this isn’t helping much. 

You think the poor man might need to get his blood pressure checked soon. 

“Well, now you know,” you shrug, and he can’t help but chuckle and roll his eyes. His gaze settles on your face, and his hand moves up to cradle your cheek. You nestle your cheek into the warm touch of his palm and watch him watching you, eyes heady. 

Your body is still buzzing with arousal, but you really didn’t want to ruin this moment with Joel. It seems as though he had other plans when his hand starts to trail down your body—the side of your neck, featherlight brushes over your collarbone, down your sternum, and your torso. 

He stops short above your pulsing clit. He can physically see your arousal coating the inside of your thighs and feel your body trembling in the slightest. 

“Oh, my poor baby,” he coos, “Now she’s all wet n’ needy for me, hm?” 

You don’t say anything. You watch him steadily, and your heart was beating so fucking hard in both places that you wouldn’t be surprised if he could feel it. 

His fingertips graze through the wiry hairs above where you need him most, and you’re not above begging him to touch you at this point. 

You need him.

Joel shifts his hips upwards, which causes his cock to brush against your cunt. You whine lowly, eyes falling shut as your eyebrows thread together in desperation. 

“Joel,” you breathe, and he shifts again. You’re so close to grinding yourself down on him, but he has other plans. He shifts your bodies so you’re now the desperate mess laying underneath him, and he’s tempted to just take you on the bed there, you think. 

But he doesn’t. He looks down between your thighs, admiring your glistening, puffy cunt before leaning down to give you a searing kiss. You card your fingers through his hair instinctually, tugging on the ends of it. 

Before things could escalate further, he separates himself from you and gets up from the bed. 

You genuinely feel like you could cry from the subtle teasing and lack of attention to your achy core. Joel offers his hand out for you to take, and you grab it hesitantly before he drags you up and out of bed. 

“What are you doing?” You echo his words from earlier, confused as to what he had in mind. He doesn’t say anything at first—just leads you into the big bathroom, opening the glass shower door. The floor was full of dark pebble stones which contrasted against the white walls, but it gave the shower a spa feel, especially with the built-in bench in the corner. 

Joel turns the shower on and grabs your waist, walking you backwards into the shower with him. The shower door snaps shut, and he’s on you. He’s kissing you with this hunger you’ve never felt before, so intense that it nearly knocks the wind out of you. 

You fist at his now semi-wet curls, pressing your body airtight to his. He moans into your mouth and his hands slide down to your ass, giving it a generous squeeze. You yelp in surprise and try to pull back, but he doesn’t allow it. One of his forearms is wrapped tightly around your torso while the other is against the shower wall. You’d probably fall if he wasn’t balancing you so well.

You felt weak in the knees, so enraptured by him. Every single cell in your body was screaming for his expert touch, for him to make you feel so good that you’d be thinking about this moment for weeks after. 

He pushes you gently against the tiled wall, the coolness sending a shiver down your spine. His free hand snakes down your body, making sure to feel every single curve, scar, and dimple your body has to offer. He was silently praising you and if he wasn’t kissing you so ferociously at the moment, you’d be overwhelmed with emotions. 

His hand eventually made its way to your torso, down down down until finally it’s where you need him most. You gasp into his mouth as his thick fingers slide through your slit generously, rubbing your clit slowly. 

Your head falls back against the wall, lungs burning from lack of air. You didn’t care though, you were already seeing stars just by enjoying the intimacy of simply making out with Joel. 

“So damn beautiful,” Joel murmurs, looking at you with a dark gleam in his eye. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him so ravenous for you. Just that very look makes your slick arousal stick between your thighs, wanting nothing more than to be devoured by him. 

Your lips part and you try to say something, but your brain is all mush and your limbs are shaking with need. His lips travel from your jaw to your jugular, giving your skin a little nibble before proceeding down to your collarbone and down to your breasts. 

He takes his time enveloping each pert bud into his mouth, toying with the other as he rolls it between his fingers. 

Your breathy moans are all that can be heard besides the water hitting the pebbled floor. You grab onto the back of his head, chest heaving as he gets down on his knees. He’s staring up at you like you’re the most divine thing he’s ever laid his eyes on. 

It makes heat rush to your face and you look away from the intensity of his gaze for a second. He grips your thighs, spreading your legs apart before shaking his head. 

“Keep those pretty eyes on me, baby,” he says, voice gravelly with an undertone of desperation. 

You bite your lip as you stare down at him, and he starts to leave a trail of kisses on your inner thighs. You brush his curls away from his face and give him a sweet smile, indulging in this little tender moment. 

He separates from you for a second before giving you a wicked grin, the once tender moment fizzling into pure carnal desire. 

“Don’t you hold back on me now, you hear me? I wanna hear those pretty sounds comin’ from my woman,” he says, and before you can respond, he dives his face right in between your thighs. 

His tongue laps up all of the slick that’d gushed from you, moaning into you at the taste of your arousal. 

You gasp and cry out his name, legs already trembling terribly. 

If someone told you a year ago that a man would have so much of an effect on you like this, you would’ve laughed in their face. You didn’t even think it was possible to feel like this, but Joel has done nothing but prove you wrong time and time again in the best way possible. 

“Fuck—oh, god,” you cry, feeling his tongue circle your clit before sucking on it profusely. A deep chuckle rumbles from his chest before he tears himself away from you, spinning you around so you’re now facing the wall. 

You don’t even have time to process what was going on until you felt his tongue on you again, but this time he prods the muscle into you and begins to fuck you with it. 

You whine loudly while clawing at the smooth surface of the tile, desperate to hold on to something. Joel pulls his tongue away from you before his hands slide up the back of your thighs to knead the plump flesh of your ass. 

“Anyone ever touch you back here?” Joel’s question takes you by surprise. You nearly choke on your breath, but you shake your head with a faint response. 

“No,” you say, and he hums. 

“Can I?” 

You try to clench your legs together at that, but his hands on you are too strong and prevent you from doing so.

“Please.” 

He doesn’t say anything else. He leans in again, licking your core before moving his tongue up to where nobody has ever touched you. You choke on a gasp when his tongue circles the tight ring, and you nearly fall to your knees. 

Christ, this man was going to be the end of you. 

He kept steady for a while, licking you up like you were the most delicious thing he’s tasted. One of his hands slid up your inner thigh once again, but this time, it was to insert two of his fingers into you. 

You’re a moaning, writhing mess above him and you’re slumped against the wall, rocking back onto his fingers and tongue. You feel the delicious warmth blooming in your belly, impending release coiling tighter by the second. 

You reach behind you and curl your fingers through Joel’s locks, tugging on them. You let out a lewd moan as the groan that evades him vibrates your whole body. You look down, only to see him pumping his semi-hard cock. Just the sight of that alone nearly sends you over the edge. 

“Joel, fuck, please—” 

“C’mon baby, give it t’me. Wanna taste you coming on my tongue.” 

And as if on command, your body gives in to his wishes. Your orgasm is forceful, ripping you apart at the seams as you scream his name. You really, really hope these walls are mostly soundproof. 

He drags you up with him before you nearly collapse from weak legs, and he situates you on his lap as he sits down on the bench. You’re gasping still, face buried in his neck as he rubs your back gently. 

“Jesus Joel, I really think you’re trying to kill me,” you huff, and you feel his shoulders shake from laughter. 

“Kill you? Never, baby. Jus’ wanna give my girl the pleasure she deserves,” he kisses your temple before you pull back to look at him, eyes all glossy and hooded. 

“Well she,” you pause to drag your fingertips over his warm, wet chest, “is one lucky woman.” 

“Mmm, is she now?” Joel’s tone is teasing and playful, and he scoots your body forward so you’re skin-to-skin once more. 

“Absolutely. You see the way those women were staring at you last night, knowing that you wouldn’t be going home with them, but with me instead?” You bring your face closer to his neck, giving his pulse point a few slow kisses. His hands move down to your hips, giving them a firm squeeze. 

“I take pride in getting to call you my man, Mr. Miller,” you lick his neck, slowly trailing your tongue up until your lips reach his ear. You reach down between you both, palming his rock hard cock before sliding the tip through your slick folds, notching his tip at your entrance. “All. Mine.”

You sink down onto him, both of you moaning in tandem before catching his lips in yet another searing kiss. 

He pulls apart from you for a second, sliding his hands down to your ass. 

“Wasn’t payin’ attention to any ‘a those other women, baby. My eyes are for you and you only.” 

The subtle possessiveness you two harbored for each other sent a thrill down your spine. 

“Ditto,” you say, starting to rock your hips. Joel moans your name as his head knocks back against the wall, eyes closing in pure bliss. You lean forward and kiss his neck, keeping a steady pace. 

“Fuck, baby. You really know how to drive a man crazy,” Joel’s breathless again, and you can’t help but giggle softly. 

“Hopefully the good kind,” you nibble on his neck before separating from him, throwing your arms around his shoulders. 

“Definitely the good kind,” he says, leaning in to kiss you again. This time it’s a bit more gentle, and once again, Joel reigns supreme at showing his heart on his sleeve just by how he kisses you. 

I love you, Joel rolls around in your mind several times—so much so that you thought you’d slip and say it aloud. 

Your thoughts are wrangled back to reality when you feel him separate his lips from yours, but staying close enough to kiss you again if he wants to. You begin to pick up your pace now and the feeling of him filling you is heavenly. Your eyes roll back and your jaw is slack, and he takes the opportunity to move you up and down on him. 

You cry out his name again, head lolling back as he sets a brutal pace and fucks up into you. 

“So fuckin’ pretty on my cock like this, baby. So fuckin’ tight,” Joel wraps his hand around the back of your neck, looking into your eyes as he continues to rock his hips. You’re moving to his rhythm, matching his pace—and the look he’s giving you makes you pulse around his cock. 

“You’re so handsome,” you say, reaching a hand out to cup his cheek. And before he can deny your compliment, you kiss him like your life depends on it. It’s not long before you feel the familiar warmth coil in your belly once more. 

“‘M getting close, Joel,” you cry against his lips, and he gives your ass a small love tap. 

“Me too, sweetheart.” 

Both of you were moaning rather lewdly, and at this moment, all that was on your mind was Joel. Not your sister and Josh or your family that’s probably already halfway done getting ready for breakfast—no, just Joel. 

Joel Joel Joel. 

The man was intoxicating and you were chasing the high every chance you got. 

“Fuck, where do you want me? I-I’m about to–”

“In me. Joel, please, in me,” you beg, and he suddenly plunges his hand down between your bodies to rub at your already sensitive clit furiously. 

Within seconds, your second earth-shattering orgasm of the day had you in shambles once again, screaming out his name as he pistoned in and out of you to chase his own high. 

His hips stilled moments later as he came, burying his face into your neck as he groaned with every pulse of his cock. 

Your bodies stayed stagnant for a while, wrapped up in each other as the warm water cascaded overhead. You were both pruny and absolutely fucked out, void of energy, but being so close to him like this made your heart flutter in the best way possible. 

Joel repeatedly kissed the junction between your neck and shoulder, rubbing your back soothingly as you two caught your breaths. He pulled back, looking into your eyes once again with a satiated grin adorning his lips. 

“How you feelin’ angel?” He asks, wiping the water droplets from your cheek. 

“Incredible, cowboy,” you giggle, pecking his lips before shifting your hips to get off of him. Your legs were still shaky, but you managed to stand slowly. Joel watches as his spend drips from you, sliding down your inner thighs. He grabs your hand, prompting you to step closer to him. He reaches his hand between your thighs, gathering his spend on his fingers before standing up to his full height, a glint of mischief in his pretty brown eyes. 

He brings his coated fingers to your mouth and you happily oblige, sucking his fingers clean with a soft moan. 

Your eyes snap open as he removes his fingers from your mouth, and you raise your eyebrow. “No more messing around, Mr. Miller. We have a newlyweds breakfast to get ready for.”

”If I had it my way, I’d keep you in this room all day and show you every single way your beautiful body can be worshiped,” he doesn’t miss a beat in his words, confidence exuding him brilliantly. 

You clench your legs together and fight the urge to hop out of the shower to give your sister a courtesy call and tell her you and Joel won’t be making it to breakfast, but the little bit of self control you harbored won the morality battle. 

“As much as I’d absolutely love to do that, we really do have to go. My family would never let me live it down and I want to see Emily off before her and Josh leave for their honeymoon.” 

“I know, baby. ‘M hopin’ we get more opportunities for this when we get back home,” he says, running a hand over his mustache and down his stubble. 

“You can have me anytime you want, cowboy.” 

-

You were surprisingly only twenty minutes late to breakfast. You and Joel made it down to the lobby, freshly showered and dressed nicely. He wore a black button down with the top two buttons undone, gray slacks, and black boots. You opted for something a bit more colorful, wearing a baby blue satin dress with white kitten heels. 

You held onto Joel’s bicep for support, and despite the heels only being a half inch, your legs were still a bit wobbly—and not because you couldn’t walk in heels. 

Joel nearly doubled down in laughter when he saw you trying to walk once you put the heels on, which earned him a glare and pouty lips. He kissed you anyway and told you how beautiful you look, pulling you in to his broad, warm body before promising to make his teasing up to you. 

Your teasing is what got me here in the first place, you’d chastised him. 

You found your mom and dad sitting outside at a long table with floral arrangements in the middle. Your dad’s plate was stacked with an assortment of breakfast foods, while your mom opted for an omelet and a croissant with coffee. 

“Good morning you two,” your mom chirped, her smile beaming at you and Joel. 

“Morning mama. Where’s everyone else…?” You ask, eyes drifting to the empty seats beside them.  

“Andy and Cole are coming down in a few minutes. Emi and Josh are getting their breakfast right now,” she says, taking a sip of her caramel colored coffee. 

You nod and set your cardigan down in the chair next to Emily’s. 

“I’m gonna go get some food. I’m starving,” you say, and you catch Joel’s lip switch up into a subtle smirk out of the corner of your eye. 

Your mom nods while your dad indulges in his breakfast, completely ignoring what you just said. A small laugh emits you as you turn to Joel, nodding toward the hotel. 

“Hungry?” You ask him. 

His smirk widens, staring at you with a glint of mischief in his eyes. 

“Starving.”

Your face heats at his words, but luckily he said it low enough to where your parents didn’t hear him. 

“You’re insatiable, Mr. Miller,” you walk with him toward the breakfast buffet area, grabbing two plates and handing him one. 

“Can you blame me, baby? I got a beautiful lady on my arm, and she gets to come home with me,” he wiggles his brows, and you can’t help but laugh at how absolutely cheesy he can be. 

One minute he’s got his face buried in your pussy telling you you’re the best thing he’s ever tasted, and the next he’s cracking jokes like you two weren’t doing anything sinful just an hour prior. 

The duality of this man is truly unmatched. 

You look around the room and see your sister plating a waffle, so you give Joel a kiss on the cheek before walking over to her. 

“Well hello, Mrs. Martinez,” you say, and your sister whips her head around. 

“God, it feels so weird hearing that. I love it so much,” she says, and you can’t help but smile at how happy she seems. 

“Well, get used to it. You’re a married woman now, missy.” 

“You probably won’t be far behind,” Emily teases, and your brows furrow. 

“Emi, Joel and I have only been together for a couple of months,” you sound flustered, and your sister gives you a knowing look. 

“So? When you know, you know, and what you and Joel have is special. I haven’t seen you this happy with anyone… ever, actually. Do you love him?” 

Her question takes you aback. You know you do, but admitting it out loud makes it all one hundred percent real. You can’t continue being afraid of your emotions, even if it may seem like it’s too fast. Self-sabotage isn’t going to fly anymore. You can’t help how you feel. 

“I do,” you finally say, and Emily breaks out into a face-splitting grin. 

“Have you told him?” 

You’re about to answer her, but Josh walks up to you both. 

“Good morning, sis in law,” he grins, nudging your side. 

“Well good morning to you too,” you laugh, giving him a side hug. 

“We’ll talk more about this later,” Emily whispers, giving your forearm a squeeze, and you give her a nod. As her and Josh walk back outside, you turn to the spread of food and concentrate on getting your breakfast. You plate a waffle, potatoes, bacon and scrambled eggs before meeting Joel at the coffee station. He hands you a cup with coffee in it, just how you like it. 

You sip it to taste test it, the warm liquid immediately rejuvenating your energy. “Mmm, my hero,” you tell Joel. “I was feeling really tired.” 

“I wonder why,” he grins, following you outside to re-join your family. 

“It’s ‘cus my man doesn’t know how to keep his needy hands to himself,” you shrug nonchalantly, and Joel rolls his eyes with a hearty laugh. 

“Hey, as far as I’m concerned, you enjoyed these needy hands.” 

You have to stifle a laugh as you approach the table again, taking your respective seats. You settled in between Emily and Joel, diving into your breakfast. 

Andy and Cole show up a minute later, looking super sluggish and hungover. You and Emily share a nudge under the table, quietly laughing to yourselves.

”Look what the cat dragged in,” you tease your brothers as they both plop down on the opposite side of the table. 

“Stop yelling so loud, Shadow,” Cole groans, and you can’t help but laugh. Idiots. 

“For the love of god, get yourself some bread and coffee. It’ll wake you fools right up,” your dad grumbles, and Andy waves his hand. 

“Fuck, fine. We will. C’mon Cole,” Andy stands up again, dragging your brother along with him. 

Your mom and dad engage in conversation with Emily and Josh, your mom nudging Emily while wiggling her brows. 

“I expect grandbabies after this honeymoon trip,” she wags her fork between Emily and Josh. 

“Jesus, mom, give them a break. They haven’t even been married for twenty-four hours yet.”

Emily gives you a silent thank you look before your mom narrows her eyes at you, pointing her fork at you now. 

“Hey, you probably won’t be too far behind your sister. Joel’s family now, baby. No goin’ back,” she smiles triumphantly, earning another round of groans from the table. 

“Fucking hell,” you mumble, “Would you stop trying to scare him off, mom?” You sigh in exasperation, rubbing your temple. 

“Can’t scare me off that easily, darlin’,” Joel says, giving your mom a wink. “I appreciate you thinkin’ so highly of me, Alexandria.” 

Your mom shoots Joel a grand smile before Andy and Cole return to the table. 

“How hard did you guys party last night?” Emily asks them. 

“Too fuckin’ hard. Feels like I’m about to have this damn hangover for a week,” Andy says, groaning before taking a bite of toast. 

“Well luckily checkout isn’t until three, so you can sleep before you hit the road,” your mom says, and they both sluggishly nod before silently eating their toast. 

“So Joel,” your dad starts, and your attention snaps to him. “Got any siblings?” 

“I do, actually. A younger brother. He works at the same firehouse as I do,” Joel says coolly, and you wonder briefly how he’s still so calm. You know if you ever got the chance to meet Joel’s parents, you’d be an absolute nervous wreck. 

Joel kept the conversation going with your dad about Tommy, and the rest of your family chimed in from time-to-time. It was then when everyone was deep in conversation that Emily gave you another nudge. You turn your head to her, raising an eyebrow. 

“You left pretty early last night,” Emily’s soft tone had a hint of mischief in it, and your eyes widened as you looked at her. 

“Shit, I didn’t miss anything, did I?” You were running through the events in your head: couple’s first dance, dancing with the bride and groom, bouquet toss, cake cutting, family photos…

She giggles softly and shakes her head. “No, but with the way you looked last night, I wouldn’t be surprised if your cowboy couldn’t keep his hands off of you.” 

Your face heats at her words. Fuck, she really knows you better than anyone on this planet. Your silence told her everything she needed to know. You swallow thickly, eyes roaming around the table. 

Joel’s hand lands on your thigh, softly brushing his thumb back and forth. His subtle touch sends a shiver down your spine, and Emily notices. 

You lace your hand with Joel’s and he gives yours a soft squeeze, all while continuing his engaging conversation with your family. 

“Yeah, uh, we um—”

”You don’t even need to say it. I knew you looked a bit different this morning. You’re glowing, my beloved sister,” she says with a smirk, and you can’t help but bashfully smile. 

“It was amazing. He’s amazing, Emi,” your voice is a mere whisper, not wanting to be overheard by anybody. 

“I can tell he is. I’m so happy for you. After Christian,” she shakes her head, rolling her eyes at the mention of your ex, “I genuinely thought you wouldn’t be receptive to opening up and finding love again. I’m so glad you did. I love seeing you happy.” 

Tears spring in your eyes at her words. You didn’t think you’d be receptive to love again either, but here you are with Joel—and fuck do you love him.

”Thank you for giving me that push, Em. I really needed it,” you say, wiping a stray tear that slipped from your eye. 

“That’s what big sisters are for,” she leans in and kisses your head, and you can’t help but thank the stars above that your sister keeps you in check when it’s really needed. 

A few hours after breakfast, everybody met down in the lobby with their stuff to check out and say goodbye. Emily and Josh were going to Costa Rica for their honeymoon, and your mom and dad had volunteered to take all of their wedding gifts and drop it off at their apartment while they were gone. Joel, Andy, Cole and Josh all helped your dad load the gifts into the bed of his truck while you, your mom, and Emily stood in the lobby. 

“Oh, I just cannot believe my buggy is married,” your mom says, bringing Emily into a near bone-crushing hug. She laughs and hugs your mom back tightly, and your mom yanks your arm toward them so you can join in. You hug them both, kissing both of their heads before letting go. 

“I’m seriously so happy for you, Emi. I know Josh is your fairytale ending you’ve always wished for,” you say, and she brings you into another hug. 

“And Joel is yours, my sweet sister,” she’s got a matter-of-fact tone to her voice, and your mom nods in agreement. 

“You two look so good together. There’s just something special about him. Call it mother’s intuition,” your mom winks at you, and you groan. 

“Can we please focus on Emi? She’s the one who just got married.” 

“Oh, fine. But don’t think this conversation isn’t going to get brought up again,” your mom says, bumping you with her hip. 

You hold your hands up in defense, knowing this isn’t something she’ll let go of too easily. 

The men all return to the lobby, and you can’t help but admire the sweaty brow and neck Joel sported, now wearing an olive green shirt that stretched across his broad chest and hugged his biceps tightly, paired with some black jeans. 

You found yourself nearly salivating, feeling like a bitch in heat. Fucking hell. You really don’t think you’ll ever be able to get enough of him. 

He notices you staring, giving you a subtle smirk before walking up to you to give your head a kiss. 

“Like what ya see?” He whispers into your ear, and you nearly groan in front of everybody. That little bit of self control you have is fizzling away every second you’re within proximity of him. 

“You know I do.” 

He grins at your verbal confession, giving your arm a soft squeeze as he pulls you into his side. 

“Well,” your mom claps her hands together, “This is it. Congratulations again, you two, and I can’t wait to hear all about Costa Rica when you come back home,” she gives both Emily and Josh a hug, kissing them both on the cheek. 

“We better get photos in the family chat,” Andy says. 

“Swim with a turtle for me,” Cole chimes in, which pulls a laugh from everyone. 

“We will. Thank you guys again for everything,” Josh says, looking at Emily with a gleam of pure love in his eyes. “My wife and I have lots of exploring to look forward to.” 

“Indeed we do,” she clings onto his arm, giving him a chaste kiss. 

Everybody gives them their round of hugs, and Emily pulls you in extra tight. “I’ll call you, okay?” She says, and you give her a small smile and nod. 

“I love you, Emi. Be safe out there and have endless cocktails for me,” you bring her in for one last hug, kissing her on the temple. 

Everybody waves Emily and Josh off as they get their suitcases loaded and themselves situated in their Uber off to the airport. 

“We’ll have to plan something for their homecoming,” your mom says after they leave.

”Does everyone live in Austin?” Joel asks the group, and everyone nods. 

“For the most part. Sometimes my job has me going down to Corpus Christi for a few weeks on end,” Andy says. 

“Well if everyone’s schedules align, I wouldn’t mind throwin’ a barbecue at my house for them when they get back,” Joel says with a grin. 

“Oh Joel, you’d be willing to do that?” Your mom clasps her hands together, and you don’t think you’ve ever seen such a hopeful look in her eye. 

“‘Course. I love throwin’ barbecues, n’ what’s more to celebrate them comin’ back from their trip?” 

Your mom just can’t help herself and throws her arms around him, pulling him into a hug. He grunts in surprise and chuckles, wrapping his arms around her briefly before she pulls away. 

“Christ honey, let the man breathe,” your dad huffs, pulling her away from him. Your mom swats your dad’s arm playfully, glaring up at him. The height difference between them is always comical when your mom tries to get mad at your dad, because she’s so tiny compared to him. 

She turns back to you both, expression switching to a smile. ”It’s settled then. We can text about the details later,” your mom looks at you, and you nod. 

“Sure thing, mama,” you say, giving her and your dad a hug. You move on to your brothers, both of them giving you tight hugs and a slug to the arm. 

“Assholes,” you laugh, “Don’t be strangers alright? Text me once in a while, idiots,” you roll your eyes, and Cole huffs. 

“Mom, Shadow is calling us idiots,” he tattles like a damn three year old, and your dad laughs. 

“Well she ain’t wrong,” your dad says, and you can’t help but laugh along with him. 

“Michael Alejandro, don’t talk about our kids like that… in front of them,” your mom says, and everyone laughs. 

“Damn dad, mom’s calling you by your government name. Looks like you’re gonna get it when you two get home,” Cole snickers, and your mom smirks at him. 

“Oh he sure is,” there was an underlying sound of need in her tone. 

“Ugh, gross mom,” Andy says, scrunching his face in disgust. 

“How the hell d’ya think you four got here?” Your dad asks, and all three of you groan. 

“Aaand that’s our cue to go. Love you everybody, drive safe, and text when y’all get home,” you say, waving to your family. Joel laughs and says goodbye to everyone, giving your mom a hug and your dad a handshake. 

Your brothers opt for a “bro hug” before he’s by your side again, lacing his fingers with yours as you blow your family one last kiss, walking out of the lobby and back to Joel’s truck, suitcases in tow. 

“What a fun weekend,” you say, and Joel’s eyes flicker back up to the hotel. Your family members weren’t in sight, so before he opens your door for you, he presses you up against his truck and cages you in between his arms. He’s got a devious smirk on his face before he dips in to kiss you. 

“Sure was, baby. Gotta say it’s probably one of the most incredible weekends I’ve had…ever, actually.” 

You raise your eyebrow, hands trailing up to Joel’s strong chest. You feel his heartbeat beneath your fingertips, and you can’t help the lazy smile that crosses your lips as you think about the night and morning you both spent together. 

“Agreed. Probably gonna have flashbacks about it for weeks,” you bite your lip, batting your lashes in a way that makes Joel’s cock jump in his jeans. 

Seems like he can’t get enough of you, either. 

“Weeks, huh? Why have flashbacks when we can recreate the moment over,” he pauses, kissing you briefly. He separates from your lips, one hand trailing down your arm and to your hand that was on his chest, lacing your fingers together once more. “And over,” he whispers against your lips, and a whine bubbles in your throat. 

“No fair,” you pout, and he laughs as he pulls away from you. 

“Insatiable, are we?” He chastises you playfully, and you roll your eyes at him with a smirk. 

“For you, Mr. Miller? Always.” 

-

The drive back to Austin was fairly quick. There wasn’t any traffic to your guys’ luck, and you made it home within an hour. 

Joel dropped you off first and walked you up to your door, carrying your luggage for you like the gentleman he is. 

“You sure I can’t convince you to let me stay?” He rolls your suitcase into your bedroom, turning to look at you as you lean up against the doorframe. 

“As much as I’d love that,” you sigh, pushing yourself off the frame, “I have some cleaning I have to do and we both have work tomorrow. I’m sure Sarah misses you terribly, too.” 

Joel chuckles at the last part, “‘M sure she’s thrilled I was gone for a whole weekend,” he huffs, and you wrap your arms around him. 

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that. That girl loves you with her whole heart and I’m sure she misses her dad,” you lean in to kiss him briefly, hands sliding up and down his back in a comforting way. 

Joel leans into your touch and sighs, softly knocking his forehead against yours. 

“You’re right. I miss her just as much. God knows she was really takin’ care of herself this weekend instead of Tommy lookin’ after her,” he chuckles, shaking his head. 

“I dunno. Seems like Maria’s got Tommy whipped into good shape.” 

Joel huffs a laugh, “‘S a damn miracle he found that woman. I swear.” 

You stand there in each other’s arms for the next few minutes, silence wrapping itself around you two. Being in his presence will always comfort you, and another part of you didn’t want to admit to yourself that you’d miss him once he left to go back to his place.

You were so used to being by yourself, even when you were with Christian. You’ve always done things on your own—that’s how it’s always been. You’re still adjusting to the idea of someone being there for you, doing things for you, liking you enough to not want to leave right away. It’s an oddity in your life that you’re having trouble wrapping your mind around, and you think that’s another reason you wanted to push away from this at first. 

The mere idea of loving someone and opening up your heart fully again did terrify you, yes, but it’s set in stone now. There’s no turning back. 

Joel Miller has your heart completely in the palm of his hand—you just need to tell him so. 

Your heart pounds against your ribcage as you pull back from him, mouth going dry as your anxiety takes over your body. 

Fuck. Here goes, well, everything, actually. 

“Joel,” you whisper, staring into those sweet brown eyes you’ve come to know and love. You can do this. Just say it. ”I—”

The shrill of his phone ringtone rang through the dense silence in the room, and a part of you wanted to sigh in relief. 

“Sorry darlin’,” his voice is soft, easily forgivable as he fishes his phone out of his pocket. His eyes skim over the caller ID, answering it before pressing the phone to his ear. 

“Hey babydoll,” he says, and you immediately knew it was Sarah. “‘M just droppin’ her off. Should be home in a half hour.”

You step back from him to give him a little more privacy for his conversation, but he grabs your waist and brings your body flush to his. 

God, you really hope he can’t feel how fast your heart’s beating. 

“Mhm, sounds good. I’ll pick that up for dinner. Love you too, bye,” he hangs up the phone, shoving it back in his pocket before his hands land gently on your hips. He gives them a soft squeeze before leaning in to kiss your forehead. 

“What was it that you wanted to tell me?” He asks, looking at you with genuine curiosity. 

You swallow thickly, throat still dry. “Just that I had a great time with you this weekend. Wish it didn’t have to end,” Nice save, you think—but you smack yourself on the hand for backing out of telling him. 

“I did too, baby. We’ll have to plan a weekend to get away, just you n’ me. How’s that sound?” He rubs his hands up and down your arms in a comforting way, making you sigh in content. 

“I’d love that,” you grin, and he nods. 

“I better get goin’ before the little rascal starts reprimandin’ me for bein’ late.”

”We wouldn’t want that now, would we?” You tease, voice laced with a hint of a laugh. 

Joel shakes his head no, flashing you his million dollar smile. 

“C’mon cowboy,” you walk him to the front door of your apartment, and he turns to you before you can open the door for him. 

“I’ll text ya when I get home, baby. Thank you for invitin’ me to spend time with you and your family this weekend,” he says, cupping your cheeks to bring you into a sweet goodbye kiss. 

“Thank you for braving it out and coming with me. Sorry if they were a bit much.”

Joel waves his hand in a playful dismissal. “Nah, they’re amazing. Even if I got interrogated by your brothers, I think this is the start of a beautiful bromance,” he wiggles his eyebrows, and you can’t help but laugh loudly. 

“You did not just say bromance. Get outta here,” you nudge him and he grins, pecking your lips a couple of more times before he opens your door. 

“I’ll see you real soon, baby. Can’t get rid of me that easy.”

”I’m counting on it, cowboy.”

-

You didn’t get to see Joel that whole week. It was now Friday, and you were missing him like crazy. You tried to ignore the weird feeling of not sleeping next to him at night, albeit only doing it a handful of times. You just felt like you got a better night’s sleep in his arms, all secure and warm.

His shifts at the firehouse have been long and chaotic, and between that and taking Sarah to soccer practice and school, Joel had his hands full. 

You understood completely. Life happens, and you knew this would happen eventually. It’s not like not seeing him was on purpose. Even Maria said she hadn’t really seen Tommy a whole lot either, so to fix the loneliness pulling at both of your hearts, you invited her out to dinner. 

You caught her up on the amazing weekend you and Joel had as soon as you both sat down. She was dying to hear the details, so you told her practically everything—except for what you did in the bedroom with Joel—all the way down to when he left your apartment. 

“Oh my god, well first of all, I’m so happy for you. Sounds like it was a perfect weekend,” she says, taking a sip of her white wine. 

You smile as you recall his hands all over you, the way he held you, his sweet words—all of it. “Thank you. It really was.” 

“Sooo have you told him how you feel about him yet?” She asks, brow quirked with a subtle grin on her lips. 

“I almost did, but then he got a phone call from Sarah and I bitched out, Maria,” you bury your face in your hands, sighing. 

“Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself. Your past relationship wasn’t all sunshine and daisies. This is a huge step for you, and you even allowing yourself to feel like this toward him is admirable in itself.” 

Her words did an excellent job at comforting you. Maybe you were just too in your head about this. But the other part of you—the logical, sensible part, constantly loomed over you like a damn gray cloud. 

“I just—fuck, what if this is too fast? Isn’t it too soon?” You ask, slumping back into your seat. “I mean, there’s still so much to learn about each other.”

“You can be in love with someone and still have a lot to learn along the way,” Maria says, “And besides. You can’t help the way you feel. I know someone who said ‘I love you’ to their partner a month into their relationship, and they’ve now been married for like fifteen years.” 

Maria grabs your hand from across the table, giving it a gentle squeeze. 

“Look, it’s normal to be scared. Every relationship is different, hon. They all go at their own pace. But, I can guarantee he feels the same way. What you two have is special,” she gives your hand one last squeeze before releasing it, leaning back in the booth before polishing off her drink. 

You know she’s right. Damn this woman and her wisdom beyond her years. It’s one of the many things you love about her. Her and your sister really keep you grounded, that’s for sure.

 You take everything she just told you into consideration, deciding that you were going to take charge of your feelings and do yourself (and Joel) the favor of telling him how you really feel. 

“Today’s their last shift I think for three days, so I’ll see if I can get him alone tomorrow,” you say, and she claps her hands together. 

“I can hear the wedding bells already,” she quips, and you can’t help but roll your eyes and laugh. 

After dinner, you two walk out of the restaurant with your arms linked, fat droplets of rain suddenly plopping on your head. 

“I didn’t know it was gonna rain tonight,” you say as you both retract yourselves back under the awning of the front of the restaurant. 

“Me either,” Maria says, wiping the droplets off of her face. 

The ringer of your phone is at battle with the sound of pouring rain, but you fish it out of your pocket and furrow your brows when you see Tommy’s name across your screen. You show the screen to Maria, and she whips out her phone to see if she’s got any missed calls from him. 

You answer the phone and put him on speaker. “You jealous that I’m out on a date with your woman?” You tease, both you and Maria laughing. 

Tommy says your name frantically over the phone, and your heart immediately drops. 

Something’s wrong.

”Tommy? What is it? Is everything okay?” The urgency in your voice now matches his own. 

“No, fuck—it’s bad. It’s bad. You need to get to St. David’s, now.” Tommy says, and your heartbeat accelerates rapidly. Your hands start to shake and your anxiety fuels every single cell in your body. 

“Tommy, what-,” you nearly choke on your own breath, “What happened? What’s wrong?” You try again, voice shaky and uncertain, hoping he’d give you an explanation. Your gaze shifts to Maria in panic, and she brings you into her side to hold you, but nothing could’ve prepared you for what you heard him say next. 

“I-It’s Joel. He’s—dammit, he’s hurt.” 

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[natalievoncatte]

“What’s wrong with me, Alex?” Kara asked, swinging her feet in a childlike, nervous way as she sat on the exam table.

Kara watched her sister putter around the room. She’d activated the red lamps and taken blood samples, and the tubes were currently spinning away in centrifuges awaiting the various tests she would run. She’s listened to Kara’s lungs and checked her pulse and waved instruments about and taken her blood pressure.

Everything about her was well within Kryptonian norms. Her pulse was running around a hundred and ten at rest, which would be alarming for a human but was a tad slow for her, and her body temperature was at a perfect one-oh-one, again just right for the last daughter of Krypton. There was no issue with her processing of sunlight and no signs of radiation exposure, which had been her fear.

Specifically Kryptonite of the red variety.

Kara had been having intrusive thoughts. They’d started here and there months ago but she’d ignored them, writing them off as some odd byproduct of fatigue or stress.

“You can go for now, kiddo,” said Alex. “I’ll let you know when the results come in.”

Alex looked more bemused than anything- probably because Kara showed no signs of actual sickness and had been cagey and indirect about her symptoms. There was a reason for that.

It became unbearable for her yesterday when Lena dropped by her office. Lena had been dressed in Kara’s favorite work ensemble, a green sweater that bared deep cleavage, a pencil skirt, and sheer silk stockings. She’d had her hair up in a meticulous bun and wore a rich plum red lipstick and smoky eyes, looking more sexpot than CEO.

Kara had barely been able to keep a straight face and make conversation. The mere presence of the other woman in the room made her heart pound and created an unbearable tension in her belly and between her thighs. Her eyes kept falling back to the pale inviting column of her throat or the lush inner curves of her breasts. Kara couldn’t stop imagining a bead of sweat rolling down between them. She couldn’t stop thinking about pressing her tongue to the flesh there and catching it, tasting the pearly bead and following its slick trail up to Lena’s throat while her chest heaved against her.

That was a problem, because those were not normal Kara thoughts. Those were not normal Kryptonian thoughts. Kryptonians did not think about those things, especially with members of the same gender. It had come with that same aching feeling between her legs that Kara had been fighting since she arrived on Earth and was dealing with now, just thinking about thinking about Lena.

Worse, Lena would be there tonight at movie night. It was an all girl’s night so it would just be Alex and Nia watching movies with them; Brainy was busy and Kelly was out of town for an academic conference and they were really just keeping Alex company.

Kara’s mind was a train wreck. She couldn’t stop thinking about Casual Lena. When she dressed down in her big sweaters and leggings and let down her hair in soft waves, she was so tiny and cute and small and Kara just wanted to eat her all up and… feel her from the inside, listen to her cries of ecstasy as Kara got creative and *relieved that fucking pressure between her legs*.

Ack! Stop it!

She had to be sick, or infected with a transdimensional parasite, or under a magic spell, or microdosed with red Kryptonite because KRYPTONIANS DID NOT HAVE THESE THOUGHTS.

So, she went for a fly to clear her head.

She ended up going hypersonic and landing at the Fortress, where she picked up the fifty thousand ton key and let herself in. Thankfully, Clark wasn’t there, so she had the vast place to herself.

The Archive here had a simpler interface, she wouldn’t have to ask a holographic version of her mother why she wanted to know what Lena’s sweat tasted like and pin her down on the sofa in her office and do things to her.

“Greetings, Kara Zor-El. How may I assist you?”

Kara looked at the hovering holographic sphere and described her symptoms, holding nothing back. It hovered there all hovery for a moment.

“What you describe sounds similar in principle to afflictions that affected ancient Kryptonians, especially under a yellow sun. Our ancestors often embraced perverse and hedonistic lusts before embracing the perfection of logic and self-discipline. However, you cannot be experiencing these unnatural and incorrect attractions, as they had been bred out of our people by the breeding program. Attraction to members of the same sex and metamorphic reproductive capability have been deemed eradicated by the Science Guild.”

“Metamorphic capabilities?!”

“Some of the ancestors possessed the ability to adapt physically to their preferred partner with the aid of yellow solar wavelengths. This is no longer possible.”

Kara chewed her lip.

The words rang in her skull. Unnatural. Illogical. It made her sound like some… like some abomination, a monster from ancient times. A tightness formed in her chest tears welled in her eyes. Was she like this? Was she broken? An aberration? Some crude vile thing with the instincts and lusts of a Daxamite? Was she broken?

She left the Fortress in a tearful rush and again she flew, too fast. Her phone started going off in the hidden pocket on the flank of her suit and she lighted on a building in Seattle to answer.

“Kara, where the hell are you?” said Alex. “Lena showed up at your place and you weren’t there and we’ve both been panic calling you.”

“I’m sorry, I was at the Fortress, trying to figure out what’s wrong with me.”

Her voice was high and pained.

Alex’s reply was soft. “Come home, Kara. We need to talk.”

Kara nodded to no one. “I’m on my way.”

She made the trip back a bit slower, honing in on Alex’s heartbeat to find her at the DEO, still in the lab. When she walked in, Alex gestured to the exam table and Kara sat down.

“What is it?” Kara almost pleaded. “Alex, tell me what’s wrong.”

“Kara, listen to me,” said Alex, taking both of Kara’s hands. “Look at me, okay.”

Kara looked at her.

“There is nothing wrong with you. I shared the results of the test with Eliza and we went over it in detail. You’re completely fine.”

“I can’t be,” Kara protested. “There has to be a reason why I’m having these thoughts, Alex!”

Pulling her hands free, she jolted to her feet and began to pace.

“There has to be. I have to be sick or messed up somehow. Kryptonians don’t have feelings like this!”

Alex closed her eyes and sighed.

“Kara, listen to me, okay? You’re not sick. You’re not broken. Your best friend is a stunningly beautiful woman and adore each other. There’s nothing wrong with having a crush on her.”

“It’s not a crush!” Kara almost shouted. “It’s more than that and it’s scaring me. What if I can’t control myself? What if I hurt her? What if she sees me looking and she thinks I’m a monster that wants to prey on her?”

Alex’s expression softened. She took a few steps, arrested Kara’s pacing, and pulled her into a bear hug.

“I know how it feels, Kara. I promise you you’re not a predator and there’s nothing wrong with you.”

“Kryptonians can’t be gay.”

“Says who?”

“Everybody! The computer! The rules! I don’t know,” The last words came as a broken whimper, and Kara sagged against her sister.

“What about this, Kara. You’re Supergirl. You can do anything.”

Kara pulled back in a daze, staring at nothing. Since she came to Earth, she’d embraced it with her whole self. As loath as she was to admit it, she loved it here. This world was so free, full of wonders and majesty for all its problems. Kara had never once questioned her love for her sister. If Alex could be gay, why not Kara? There was no science council here, no one to ordain who she must marry and breed with.

Why not?

She felt dizzy, and strangely relaxed, as if she’d just heaved a massive weight off her shoulders.

Alex offered her a tissue and she dried her tears.

“Go get the girl,” said Alex. “I’ll call Nia and tell her you need some alone time.”

Kara nodded, and felt half in a daze as she left the infirmary. She stepped out onto the balcony and texted Lena, can I come over?

Lena replied immediately, Yes.

Kara’s heart hammered her ribs as she landed on the balcony. Lena rushed to the door and threw it open, ushering her inside. Kara stepped into the living room of the penthouse and stumbled to a stop.

Lena was dressed down and so soft, from the mop of her wavy hair pulled into a low ponytail to her cashmere sweater down the length of her toned legs to her bare feet.

“What’s wrong?”

As Lena asked, she darted forward, offering a hug. Kara gingerly let herself be pulled into the embrace, hesitant at first. Lena dove into her, throwing herself into the hug as if she wanted to climb inside Kara. Kara wrapped her in her arms and drew her cape around them both. She couldn’t stop thinking about Lena’s feet being cold, about wanting to make her warm.

Before she answered, Kara buried her face in Lena’s hair and breathed deep. Lena’s scent hit her like a train. It was like swallowing a mouthful of alien rum, filling her chest with a spreading warmth and making her head swim.

“I’ve been trying to work some things out, and I was scared, so I ran off to the Fortress. I’m sorry.”

Lena pulled back gently and looked up at her. They were so close. Lena’s big, pretty blue-green eyes were full of worry but dark, her pupils blown.

“What’s bothering you? I’ll throw money at it until it goes away.”

Kara swallowed, hard. “I don’t want it to go away.”

Lena arched a brow. “Oh?”

Kara licked her lips and as she did, Lena’s eyes darted and followed the motion of her tongue. Kara was suddenly away of Lena’s hands resting just above her hips now, the way that her hugs and touches always seemed to trend lower, the casual way that Lena leaned into her as she looked up.

She bit her lip and Kara almost died.

“I think I like girls,” Kara blurted out.

“You certainly like my girls, Kara Danvers. You can’t stop looking.”

“You noticed?” Kara squeaked.

“Kara, darling, you’ve been staring at them for thirty seconds just now.”

Kara’s gaze snapped up.

“I’m sorry, I, oh Rao oh God, Lena.”

Lena curled her fingers around Kara’s chin and tilted her head back down.

“Did you really think I didn’t notice? The day we met you paid more attention to my boobs than my business card.”

“You gave me a business card?”

“See what I mean?”

Kara swallowed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

Lena’s thumb grazed her jaw and Kara thought her heart might go off like a bomb in her chest. She shuddered and her toes curled in her boots.

“I’ve been teasing you for years,” she said, “I’d almost given up hope. I wouldn’t be the first disaster bisexual to nurse a futile crush on her best friend.”

Kara swallowed hard. “So should we like go on a date?”

Lena’s fingers traced down her neck, then along the ridge of her collarbone.

“I was thinking more Netflix and chill. I know and trust you, Kara. You’ve saved my life more times than I can count, I’m ready now if you are.”

“Ready?” Kara squeaked.

“So are you, I think,” said Lena.

She rolled her hips and Kara immediately realized what she meant and what the Archive meant by her body adapting.

“Ohshit,” Kara chirped. “Oh God Lena I’m sorry, this is so embarrassing, I didn’t mean to-“

Lena lunged and suddenly they were kissing. Lena’s lips were so soft and she was intoxicating. Kara pulled her into an embrace, almost lifted her off the floor as she kissed her back. Lena threw one leg up and hooked it wound her hip, and Kara instinctively scooped her up and felt a jolt through her body as Lena then wrapped both legs around her waist.

“Fuck, you’re strong,” Lena panted. “Oh God, Kara. Bedroom. Now. Please.”

“You want…”

“Yes! What are you fucking waiting for?”

Later, hours later, Kara lay in Lena’s bed, while Lena slept blissfully next to her, head resting on Kara’s shoulder, smiling contentedly. She looked over at her and tucked the sheets and blankets up close around her chin and smoothed stray strands of hair back from her eyes. Lena made a small sound, and curled around Kara’s side.

Kryptonians, it turned out, could be very good at being gay.

[joelalorian]

Tides of Desire masterlist

yacht captain!joel miller x f!reader

Complete: TLOU no outbreak AU. Joel Miller is a luxury yacht captain running charters in the Caribbean. You join the crew as a deckhand and unexpectedly complicate Joel's peaceful existence. Basically the TLOU bunch on a Below Deck yacht.

Chapter One - A Prelude to the Open Sea

Chapter Two - The Adventure Begins

Chapter Three - The Cut of One's Jib

Chapter Four - Cut and Run

Chapter Five - Red Sky in Morning

Chapter Six - Edging Forward

Chapter Seven - From Stem to Stern

Chapter Eight - As the Crow Flies

Chapter Nine - Close Quarters

Chapter Ten - On Your Beam Ends

Chapter Eleven - All at Sea

Chapter Twelve - Turn the Corner

Epilogue

[zorawitch]

lads, ladies, and otherwise, my desire character study fic is back up!

[roachymochi]

Not gonna lie if i was in Shuro's place and every time I tried to do something by myself as a child only to meet the Knife Hag, I too would have trouble expressing when something or someone is bothering me in an healthy manner.

[acid-ixx]

Ohhhhhhhmisggashoosghhh

I love everything about "before the bell rings"

Such masterpiece such peakness oh my goodkdasssdffrddf. Couldnt stop thinking abt it couldnt stop rereading it its ltrly currently 3:11 am rn i wasnt aware of the time all i know was that i was obsessively drawing this man with your story in my mind my god i couldnt stop giggling and blushing n i had to take few breaks n paces in my room to cool off

HOPE U ARENT TOO WEIRDED OUT

— related post ! (tw: a bit nsfw, non-con kissing)

OHMYGOD. OHMYGOD!!! user luffyadolover you are the gift that keeps on giving because WHAT THE HELL??? more than five sketches of this feral, horny man and HE'S SO HANDSOME ILYSM FOR THIS!!! i'm actually so down bad i had to stare at the last image for a few minutes because YOU DREW THE ENTIRE SCENE SO WELL.

i love the first image, you drew him so well, the slick-back hair and everything!?!? with him looking all so proud of himself when he chooses something for his spouse that they actually really like, as if he didn't just planned to ignore you or to simply hastily choose whichever looks the fanciest; that was the plan until his brain haywires just witnessing the absolute joy on your face every time he picks something right; imprinting the memory of your smile in his brain to the point he sees it every time he blinks— so now it's become his daily mission after falling for you to traverse each and every shopping site and malls in his batcave to ensure you only get the highest quality of gifts. mind you, he is a very dedicated man, bruce wayne doesn't give up so easily.

AND THE SECOND AND THIRD IMAGES TOO !!! with his mask on, you couldn't really tell just how obsessed he is, due to the blunt face he always has to wear, but the comparison of him without; with the stare that speaks of a million promises all dedicated to honoring and cherishing his beloved spouse. he doesn't need wedding vows when his eyes (always almost unexpressive, unable to fully show the full range of his emotions; vulnerable in the midst of worshipping his sleeping, little deity) already presents what your future life would like with him.

it doesn't matter if you're drooling, or butt-fuck naked. if i say he's remembering every small, incoherent detail about how you sleep, what position you sleep in, even the position you bury your head in the pillow, let that devotion cement in the very crevices of his mind and in every corner of his heart. it wouldn't matter anyways that you're sleeping alone, hugging a pillow (that should've been him) now, because soon, you'd be quickly migrated in his bed, in his arms, and you won't be getting out. he'd be too invested in the smell of your hair, the feel of the pudge in your stomach, and the seams of your clothing rubbing against his thighs to even allow you to let go.

AND GOD, THE SKETCH WHERE HE'S JUST LICKING THE SPIT AND ALL?!? my brain is malfunctioning, i'm going insane. this is my favorite fanart of yours so far, i'm so grateful for your existence because you've graced me 😭 i'm absolutely not going to deny the future accusations of me writing for debauched and absolutely feral and/or horny bruce wayne!!! trust me when i'm telling you that he's not only memorizing exterior parts of you, but bruce promises (it's actually just him justifying his actions) himself that he has to remember what the inside of your mouth feels like to fully and properly kiss you before your wedding date arrives, just to establish how much of an absolutely perfect husband he will be for you.

to make up for all his past mistakes of absolutely ignoring you, to ensure you that it's not you who's the problem— it's him and he has to fix it all. he has to guarantee that you won't even dare look at another man; even if it means watching you every night disguised as the bat, then coming home to the manor (your shared home, soon) by the time the sun breaks out of its sleepy stupor, just to dream about what it'd feel like pinning you willingly and taking you all for himself after your honeymoon— how could a man like him stop dreaming about his beloved spouse? how could he control his hands to stop lingering beneath his utility belt just to touch and pleasure his body the same way he wishes to worship yours?

the answer is: you don't. or rather, you couldn't.

so if you ever feel your lips becoming more and more sore every other night, and notice the trinkets from your desk and even undergarments from your closet now missing... well, you'll soon know who the culprit is...

a/n: no, i do not tolerate this behavior irl. once again, pls be aware guys that this is a yandere blog (and i've been writing content like this for years) and i'm bound to write more extreme concepts compared to this. the only element that never disappears from this is that i'm writing under the sub-"category" of soft yandere. that doesn't mean it doesn't stray away from the eventual dub-con/non-con.

once again, thank u so much for the dedication to send me so many good fanarts @luffyadolover 😭🥹, although i may not always reply quickly, i appreciate you and all the other fanartists who spend their time drawing inspired by my content. it's truly an honor, and in all my years of writing, you guys are one of the reason why i still continue to write <333

[starcurtain]

Hey! I apologize if this question has been asked before since it seems like a pretty obvious one, but where do you think the idea of Aventurine being a sex slave came from? Other than the obvious factor of it being something fun for the fandom to mess around with, I mean.

It's something I kind of took for granted as being true before playing his quest, but after finishing it I realized there wasn't really any indication. The only thing I can really think of is his master's comments about him having a good body. Is there anything in his behavior you can think of that would lead to this conclusion if it wasn't a popular fan interpretation already/kind of just an easy conclusion to reach with a slave character?

(also kind of related but what do you think of the idea that he sleeps around/with his clients to make deals? he's obviously willing to sexualize himself with the boob window, but that doesn't necessarily mean he goes further.)

As far as I can tell, the idea that Aventurine was involved in sexual slavery comes from three (maybe four) places:

First, the comment from the master about Aventurine's appearance. People were holding this comment up as refutable proof that Aventurine was used in sexual slavery on top of being tossed into the Hunger Games; however, the response from other players on this interpretation, especially the Chinese side of the fandom, was very mixed, with a lot of people pointing out that the context in the game probably meant the slave master was talking about Aventurine's ability to attract attention from fans watching the literal Sigonian Hunger Games, rather than having a direct sexual-slavery connotation.

Second, the comment from Sparkle about stripping naked and getting on his knees for Sunday. This one has way more implication in English than I think it might for an Eastern audience, actually. In English, this pretty much sounds like Sparkle saying Aventurine trades sexual favors for success in his gambles. However, I suspect the original intention in Chinese was more about humiliation. Western audiences don't have as much history with honor-based prostration, i.e. accepting corporal humiliation as a form of reconciliation that Eastern audiences might be more familiar with. And in any case, Sparkle is Sparkle. She probably just went for the lowest blow she could think of here.

Third, the general assumption that if Sigonian slaves were being chained, branded, beaten, sent to death matches, etc., it seems logical that they would also be taken advantage of in other ways. I honestly think this is probably the fairest take--many, many real slaves around the world faced (and still face!) sexual abuse, so if slaves from Sigonia were treated so poorly you could make them fight to the death for entertainment, it stands to reason they were probably also not safe from other forms of assault. We also have no idea what happened to Kakavasha in any of the years between his being a tiny child fleeing the massacre and then being purchased as a slave as a late-teens-early-twenties person. That's a very long time for a child to have to survive on their own on an extremely hostile planet and not face risks of all kinds or end up needing to do unspeakable things to survive. So I think this is at least not that far-fetched, although it's important to say there's nothing in the game that directly confirms this.

And fourth: I read a tweet semi-recently that stated that one of the Chinese (or maybe it was Japanese) names for a quest Aventurine was involved in was actually a reference to a book about a teenage sexual assault survivor. However, when I tried to verify this myself, I couldn't find any quest Aventurine was in that was based on a book about sexual assault in either English, Chinese, or Japanese. It's possible I just missed something, but I'm taking this one with a bit of a grain of salt currently, since I can't confirm it personally.

Regarding your other question, about whether I think Aventurine sleeps around to make deals...

I definitely think he does not, for one major reason.

First, I will admit that Aventurine is definitely willing to use his appearance to his advantage. This is pretty obvious. He wears incredibly flashy clothes, baths himself in cologne, overloads on glittering golden jewels, and absolutely calls attention to his appearance when working with clients.

We see him actively doing this in his Moment Among the Stars video, where he is clearly using his looks as an equal tool (to his wealth), to daze his target.

It's not an accident that he says things like "Use me as you wish," with all the explicit connotations preserved. The implication is there. However, unless he was absolutely backed into a corner, I think that implication is all it will ever be.

The reason I think this is that the devs go out of their way to give Aventurine three fairly noticeable physical behaviors in his in-game scenes:

For one, he has some of the most closed off body language of any character in the game.

Aventurine's default conversation pose is arms crossed directly and tightly in front of himself. This is like "Defensive Body Language 101." By crossing your arms, you put a symbolic barrier between yourself and the person you're speaking to, and also ensure that your hands are up and available in case you actually need to physically defend yourself.

Virtually all of Aventurine's conversations take place from this stance, no matter who he is speaking to (from the Trailblazer all the way to Topaz). He deliberately closes his pose off and tightens up his silhouette, which just sends a glaring "Don't touch me" message.

This closing off is also blatantly apparent when you compare it to the deliberately open poses he strikes while trying to make himself seem accessible to others (like tempting clients) or seem powerful (to intimidate):

Complementing this habit of closing himself off is a second noticeable aspect of his body language: He frequently avoids eye contact to the point that he even holds conversations while entirely facing away from the person he's speaking to.

I might be a bit lenient and say maybe he's doing this to on purpose to be mysterious, whoo~~ But... in all honestly, he just does this with everyone, even with Ratio while trying to talk about an actual important issue (wanting to look into Acheron's real identity). Hell, even the fake Aventurine does it to himself!

We can even say that wearing the rose-tinted glasses in the first place is another intentional barrier, one Aventurine deliberately removes in specific moments to give people the (false) impression that he's "letting them in" to his circle:

Now, this might be a bit more complicated in Aventurine's case, because eye contact has a whole extra meaning when eyes are the defining trait of your species and come with particularly challenging racial stereotypes. So it may be that Aventurine is simply used to conducting conversation while looking away to minimize racial prejudice against his eyes' unique appearance.

However, I'd also argue that the devs deliberately turned his entire model away in cutscene after cutscene to create a clear sense of being inaccessible, unapproachable, and unwilling to engage in the physical intimacy of standing closely, directly facing, and staring at his conversation partners.

While he faces away, he controls both the figurative and the literal direction of conversation, forcing people to keep their eyes on him while he is free to move as he pleases. Over and over again, it just says "I want to be the one in control. I'm not afraid to show my back to you, but you are not welcome to come near me."

And, in fact, that's a third aspect of his character's body language that I am sure the devs did not include accidentally: More so than other characters, many of Aventurine's conversations are conducted from weirdly far distances. Like, half the time he's talking, he's standing all the way on the opposite side of the room!

This habit of speaking from a-larger-than-normal distance is apparent in the first scene with Himeko...

And then in just about every other conversation too:

The bubble is twenty feet in every direction.

Like yes, he does approach and have conversations like a normal person... sometimes... But it is significantly more noticeable with Aventurine than with other characters that he often conducts whole conversations--even with his allies--from a distance. Just genuinely weirdly far apart.

Leaving space for Gaiathra, I guess.

And it's because these significant decisions were made with Aventurine's in-game body language that, when he deliberately alters his own behavior, it is instantaneously noticeable.

In 2.0, he closes the distance, the glasses come off, and he gets directly up in the Trailblazer's face.

It's uncomfortable not just because the player is suddenly being loomed over, but because this behavior has already been subconsciously established for the player as out of character for Aventurine.

The barriers the character himself was putting up are deliberately stripped away so that he can use physicality and demanding eye contact to intimidate his target. He has to reverse his own normal body language in order to come across as domineering (and, I guess if you're into that, appealing in a domineering manner).

And ummmm, just a tiny aside here because I can't resist:

This does mean that when the game goes out of its way to demonstrate Aventurine altering his own normal habit of distant and defensive body language, it is absolutely intentional.

Yes, this is a Ratiorine post in disguise. There literally isn't any other character in the game that Aventurine is shown being comfortable standing so close to and interacting with in this manner. This doesn't occur in every one of their scenes, but Ratio is the only character that this happens with repeatedly. It's not an accident that the devs literally added "They were walking side-by-side" as flavor text.

But look, I'll be fair: There's a great example of this in Aventurine's scene with Acheron too, where he closes the distance and attempts to make eye contact with her--seeking her guidance and closeness--and she is actually the one stepping away, speaking with her back turned, demonstrating her power and control (and issues with connection!) in that scene.

Anyway, this was a whole longggg tangent into analyzing Aventurine's body language, but my point is that, overall, the devs deliberately adjusted his model's actions in-game to give the impression of a person who clearly wants to be in control of every interaction he has with other people, who insists on distance over intimacy, and whose stances and habits suggest that he is significantly less accessible and open than his "Use me as you wish" motto might suggest.

Long story longer, I think that there is almost zero chance Aventurine is willingly ceding control over himself or the actions expected of him to anyone he isn't 100% comfortable with, and I think that using physical intimacy of any kind would be an absolute last resort for him. Frankly, he comes across as more likely to shoot himself in the foot than let someone he doesn't trust lay hands on him.

To me, he reads very much as "You may look, but you may not touch."

[gothcsz]

The scene in front of you looks like something out of a romantic painting, and it hits you how undeniably beautiful he looks. His skin, a warm golden brown, contrasts perfectly with the creamy white of the bath, and the colorful flower petals floating on the surface make the whole thing look like a dream.

i would like to thank the talented and beautiful @king-simp for creating this masterpiece 🖤 it perfectly illustrates what i had in mind when writing the infamous bathtub scene in unscripted desire 🫧 i commissioned this as a birthday gift for myself, but also as a gift to all my amazing readers and mutuals who have been super supportive, not only for this series but for all my other works, too! i appreciate every single one of you so much; thank you for making this online space so fun and comfortable for all of us to get horny in 🖤 mwah, i love you cariños!