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pandoraborn · 4 years ago

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NO PLACE FOR HEROES Chapter One. (prologue)

The dig site is a miserable location: cold, dark, and if Jackie didn’t know any better, he’d say it was more of an asteroid than some desolate planet. He’d say more it was a moon, even, with how little oxygen is available. The mask he’s forced to wear just to survive tells him this isn’t a habitable planet.

He knows why they’re there though. ‘They’, being the Dahl splinter group run by Marcel LaMont. If asked by Marcel himself, Jackie would put on a large smile and say there was no one he’d rather work for, but in private, Jackie would bitch about the man. Marcel is a tall, muscular man with a charming smile that shines brightly on the surface, but carries nothing but malice underneath his persona. It’s a face Jackie would very much love to punch one day, not just because the man’s an asshole, but because of his beliefs.

Come to think of it, Jackie can’t understand why he’s even still working for Dahl. Dahl official went out of business years ago, having disbanded for reasons unknown. Marcel had offered a job, promising to rebuild, and Jackie, like any desperate moron, had taken him up on his offer.

That’s how they ended up on this stupid pathetic chunk of rock to begin with.

With a shiver, Jackie sits in his tent, using an unopened crate as a chair as he uses a lantern to pour over documents. There are maps and locations Marcel wants Jackie to mark out with his ECHO, but Jackie can’t concentrate. There must be hundreds of pages of scrawled notes to sift through and put on the ECHO, and already Jackie can feel his eyes rolling back into his head. He hadn’t even made it past the first page.

A lot of the notes are how Marcel wants to hire prisoners to do the dirty work for him. That’s something Jackie will forever disagree with the man over; there’s a fully functional crew of at least twenty men here that can mine the planet for whatever ores they’re looking for. Jackie also knows well ahead of time that this planet probably doesn’t have anything valuable to its name, otherwise there would be more than one port city on the entire surface. They’re already a few hours away from port as is, Jackie can’t understand why Marcel got the genius idea to camp so far away from the meager civilization.

“Jackie, are you done yet?” Marcel’s sleepy voice is heard at the entrance of Jackie’s tent, causing the man to jump back, nearly toppling over. He presses his hand to the side of his face, checking to make sure his goggles haven’t fallen off in his surprise.

“No, sir, you just gave me these notes an hour ago. I’m still trying to make sense of them.”

Marcel steps into the tent, looking far more intimidating when half bathed in shadows. He seems taller, bigger. Jackie can feel himself shrinking back in sheer hatred as he stares at Marcel’s neck. “I expect you to do the work I assign you, Jackie. I hired you for a reason, and I’m starting to wonder if you’re pulling your weight.”

Jackie’s eyes narrow as he chews on his bottom lip. “Marcel, you gave me hundreds of notes an hour ago. I’m not exactly sure what it is you want from me. I’m tired, bro.”

“Then let me speed up the process for you: I want you to get on the ECHO and scan for nearby prison ships in need of labor. Also, do not call me bro.”

“I’m not hiring slaves for you, Mark.” Jackie’s tone is cold now. “We can dig ourselves. We have the equipment and the manpower, I don’t know why you want slaves, especially when we’re not guaranteed to find anything worth much here.”

“I smell minerals in the air, Jackie. This place is going to earn me plenty of riches, and twenty men isn’t enough to mine through to the center of the planet. Get on the ECHO and start asking around for prisoners who want to work. I’m going to need a full crew. I’m not taking no for an answer.”

He leaves before Jackie can disagree again. Jackie slumps back against the crate, crumbling up a few pages of notes and tossing them toward the entrance of the tent, before burying his face in his hands. Normally Jackie would grit his teeth and bear with Marcel’s eccentricities, but he can’t tolerate this. Jackie doesn’t want to work alongside criminals, he wouldn’t trust them, and it’s this bullshit that landed Dahl in hot water before. Hell, it’s how Pandora came to be infected with bandits.

He starts scanning the rest of the notes, trying to find anything he could use against Marcel. He picks up the whole pile, ready to chuck everything to the floor so he can stomp on it in a childish fit, but the second Jackie lifts the pile, a wrinkled, torn map slips free and back to the table.

It’s not often people find a hand drawn map, it’s not often they exist, but this one does. It’s labeled as official documentation; Jackie recognizes the Dahl emblem in the top right corner. This only tells Jackie that Marcel isn’t supposed to have this either, or he didn’t mean to pass it over to Jackie.

It doesn’t make much sense, but he can guess from the scrawled notes that this is a big discovery. The handwriting isn’t Marcel’s, it’s not anything Jackie recognizes, and it’s almost indecipherable. Still, Jackie holds his wrist over the map, hoping his ECHO picks up more than he can. A hologram of a planet opens up, with that same scrawled handwriting spinning around the center of the planet. Jackie blinks and leans closer, pulling his goggles over his eyes so he can see better.

“What is Kaladia?” Jackie’s keeping his voice low as he starts speaking to himself, shooting glances toward the entrance to make sure Marcel isn’t coming back. He reaches his other hand up to spin the hologram around, zooming in on the planet, then out. He can’t tell where it is, but he looks back down at the map, tilting his head to the side. He moves his echo over more, scanning all the notes and trying to pick up more information.

“A vault?” Jackie frowns when his ECHO beeps. It’s a map that leads to a planet, that’s for certain, but where this planet is, is still a mystery. According to his echo, it’s a planet that’s a giant vault, or so the notes say. There’s more, though, his ECHO is beeping again, more rapidly than before.

Jackie hunches over the map, as well as the hologram as he continues to study. According to the map, the planet is rumored to be a myth. Even his ECHO is saying the planet doesn’t exist. But if it’s a giant vault, that must mean it holds boundless treasure. Jackie’s eyes widen at the implications. If Marcel has this map, and he’s wanting slave labor, that must mean he already has some idea.

Not if Jackie takes this away from the asshole.

Getting to his feet, Jackie peeks out of his tent, listening for any voices. He can’t hear anything but distant snoring. It sounds like everyone is asleep, and he can only hope Marcel went back to bed after being his typical self righteous self. This gives Jackie the perfect opportunity to grab the map, fold it up, and shove it in his pocket. He shuts the hologram of the planet off as well, so the light emitting from the ECHO doesn’t alert anyone.

He’s going to have to walk a distance before using a vehicle. Jackie knows there are Catch-A-Rides periodically across the planet, which is fine with him, it’s not like walking well away from camp is going to hurt him. He just needs to get to the port city as soon as possible and catch the next ship leaving.

Quietly, Jackie rummages through his tent, gathering anything he might need on him. Most things can be stored digitally, like money and weapons he might need, but everything else, like food, needs to be carried in his backpack. He stuffs it full of canned goods and leftover pizza before flinging it over his shoulders. Jackie briefly contemplates raiding Marcel’s tent for goods, but decides against it. Marcel is a light sleeper, and Jackie doesn’t want to explain why he’s running away with something of high value.

He glances around his tent one last time before leaving, taking the lantern with him for light. Truthfully, Jackie doesn’t even need the lantern, but it’s his last ‘fuck you’ to Marcel. He checks his ECHO though, looking at the port city’s ship schedules. There’s a ship that’s bound to leave for Promethea in four hours, which is perfect for Jackie. Still, he radios the city.

“Yeah?” Comes the static-filled voice of the operator, Jackie’s assuming. “How can I help you?”

“What time does your next ship leave?” He’s walking briskly, glancing over his shoulder every few seconds. He’s going to have to ditch this ECHO, or at least hack it so Marcel can’t easily radio in and track Jackie down. “Also, I’d like to buy a spare ECHO. I need a new one.”

“We have one leaving for Athenas in two hours, Promethea in four, and we have ECHOnet devices available, how far away are you and when can I expect you?”

Jackie breathes a sigh of relief. “I’ll be there just in time to board for Promethea. Can I place an ECHO device on hold? I’d like to transfer almost everything over immediately.”

“You’re not a bandit, are you?” The voice on the other end sounds suspicious. Jackie can practically see their brow furrowing with concern.

“No, I’m on the run from one.” Probably not the smartest way to describe Marcel, but Jackie’s well aware that this move is going to cost him greatly. “I need to be able to not be tracked. Can I transfer my funds and weapons over to a new one? You can take the payment out of my money, I’ll pick it up when I get there.”

“Sure, give me your information too. I’ll make sure you’re all set by the time you get here. Er, what did you say your name was?”

Jackie looks back one last time. The camp is now in the distance, with him having already put a decent distance between himself and Marcel. His heart is racing though, because there are lights on now, which means Jackie’s window of escaping is starting to close. He needs to leave, now. “Jackson Collins. I’ll transfer my information over, I just need to ditch this one. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

“Roger that, Jackson. We’ll set you up.”

The line goes dead after that. Maybe they hung up on each other at the same time, Jackie doesn’t know. Still, he’s walking forward, pushing as fast as he can without breaking into a run. While he walks, he transfers his ID, his money, weapons, and even the hologram over to the operator. Everything else: his contacts, his business information, is completely discarded. Jackie shuts the ECHO off and drops it to the ground, kicking dirt up around it in an attempt to hide it. Then, he runs.

The only thoughts on Jackie’s mind now are thoughts of this strange planet, and if it means sticking it to some greedy asshole, then Jackie will be happy to take on this role.

After all, he knows he’s a greedy asshole too.

#writersofmark #writersofjack #actor mark #jackieboy man #septic ego fanfiction #septic egos #iplier egos #no place for heroes #ch. 1 #long post #borderlands #septic ego au #borderlands au #spoilers #also found on ao3 #miishae writes

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3starsquinn · 4 years ago

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Let’s Get Down to Business || Alain & Orion

Timing: Current

Parties: Alain ( @carbrakes-and-stakes ) & Rio

Content Warning: Abuse mentions

Summary: Rio is desperate for some answers and Alain is willing to provide. Until they get interrupted. Rude.

Orion didn’t know what he was about to walk into. When he messaged Alain, it had been in a more emotionally fragile state than he had cared to admit. There had been so much going on this week. Between the love potion and his run in with Athena. But even with all of that drama, he still couldn’t get that troll out of his head. Couldn’t stop thinking about how Rio had stopped that troll from ever doing anything again. He had taken that life. Justified or not, Rio couldn’t shake the guilt. And he needed to talk to someone that understood what that felt like.

When Orion found Alain, he was thankful that the man was alone and not currently tousling with a vampire. He offered a small wave as soon as the two spotted each other and continued his sulk across the abandoned pilot to close the gap between them. “Hey” he added once he had finally joined up with him. “I don’t know what I’m doing here.” That was true. In his rush of emotions, maybe Rio had an idea what he wanted to say in the back of his mind as he was furiously typing the message out to him. But standing here with Alain face to face, any semblance of a clear thought Rio once had all but washed from his mind. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

Alain was dusting his sword clean when he heard Orion approach. Lost in his thoughts, he had not been paying much attention to his surroundings, figuring that if undead rose, he would feel them before he could see them anyway. He was not sure what it was Orion wanted, but if he had agreed to meet him here, in the middle of the night, it had to be important. Sitting on the front steps of a now clean mausoleum, the hunter watched Orion approach and waved back. “Hey,” he replied, scooting to the side so that the kid could sit down too, if he wanted.

The kid looked completely lost, however, and Alain, since he had no idea what this meeting was about, found himself with both his eyebrows raised, puzzled. “That’s okay,” Orion spoke again and he could feel his heart sink in his chest. How was he supposed to help someone who felt lost when he himself had no idea where he was headed either? “Sit down. Tell me what happened, I’m sure you’ll remember why you’re here.”

Orion followed Alain’s instructions, taking a seat next to him. He sat quietly for a long moment, still trying to figure out exactly what he wanted to say or how he wanted to say it. Why was this so hard? If there was anybody that should know how Rio felt it was a hunter that showed some sense of apprehension for the job too. Rio couldn’t think of Alain without thinking of the first conversation they had ever had in his garage. Maybe Alain was still doing the job, maybe he even thought it was necessary. But there was something about him that made Rio think that he sometimes wondered what could have been. “I don’t know how you do it.” Because of course Rio knew why he was here. He just didn’t know why he had to do this right now, “I got attacked in the woods a few weeks ago. There were these trolls and they tried to kill Kaden and I. And it was going to kill me and I-” He pulled his knees up on the step with him and hugged them, “I killed it. And I can’t stop thinking about it. How do you train yourself to take a life?”

Alain remained quiet the whole time Orion was speaking. He put down the sword, the rag, and crossing his arms, he leaned back against the step behind to listen to the boy. “Kaden must have already told you that it was either you or him,” it felt like this was the kind of justification most hunters gave to justify many things, him included, but it was a justification that truly made sense when speaking of creatures that behaved like wild animals. “A normal person wouldn’t have made it out alive, maybe you saved a bunch of people,” and maybe a bunch of others died before Orion took care of that beast. He could have said this too, but he felt like it would not really cheer him up.

Then came the question of How. “You and I were both trained since we were in what.. 1st grade? Earlier?” But this was not what made you a killer. You were trained, sure, but a killer. Accidents aside, killers had a purpose, something to fulfil, and in hunters’ case, it was an idea : the sense of duty. “You don’t train, you are told to, and usually, it begins by killing things that look nothing like people,” in his case, it had been spawns. The human looking vampires came later, once spawns had become a habit, some sort of routine. “Most people assume that I like doing this,” it was not entirely false, otherwise, Alain wouldn’t be here, but it was his sense of duty that always brought him back here, not his hatred for vampires.

Orion nodded. “He did.” And he had, along with anyone else that heard about what happened. It was an easy defense, one that should have helped Rio feel better. Logically, he knew it was true. It had been self defense. The troll fully intended on killing Rio and then Kaden if nothing had been done. The troll had said it themselves. But Rio still couldn’t help but think that the reasoning left a sour taste in his mouth. Like something had been missing. “It’s just- I replay it over and over again in my head. I could have done something differently, right? Why were they violent to us in the first place? Did they know what we were?” Did they deserve it? Rio almost asked the question but decided against it, “What if I could have said something differently. Or anything. Why did it have to end that way?” He wiped at his eyes. He had done so much crying recently he was surprised he had any tears left. But it was just as embarrassing now as it always was. He wished he could switch it all off. Although, Rio hadn’t considered Alain’s second point. If the trolls were so quick to kill Kaden and Rio, would other people fall victim to them just as quickly? Ones that wouldn’t survive being thrown against a tree or crushed under the grip of a rocky giant? “I don’t know. Maybe. That’s why I hate this. I can’t even see the full picture. How am I supposed to decide something as important as taking a life when I can’t even see every angle?” Orion was a patient person. He never liked acting before thinking through every scenario his mind would allow him. It was why Athena would complain whenever the two played chess. He always took too long to move, examining all of his options before finally pushing a piece forward.

“Yeah. I mean, Not sure if mine could be considered training or not.” Orion had been rebelling in his own way since childhood. Maybe he wasn’t as loud or as confrontational as Athena could be, but he had learned his own tricks to annoy his parents. And he could do it without ever raising a fist or even speaking. Alain was right. From a young age, the two were first introduced to the more monstrous side. Fed stories that would have made any normal kid cower beneath their sheets. It wasn’t until the two got older that they slowly started to get introduced to the more human side of their victims. “I don’t think you like doing this.” Rio offered. He wished he knew for sure. But as it was, he didn’t know much about Alain’s hunting habits at all. Besides that he was resigned to the same sense of duty that most hunters seemed to be. “I think you do it when you feel like you have to. But that doesn’t mean you get any joy from it.” Maybe Rio was wrong. Off base. He hoped that he wasn’t. “My sister killed a Fae right in front of me the other day,” Rio began. “I don’t know what it was. To me, it just looked like a cat. I think she did it to get under my skin. How could someone do something like that? She likes it. It scares me.”

“I don’t know Orion,” Alain turned his head to look at him. With a heavy breath, he reached out to put his hand on the boy’s opposite shoulder, so that he would look at him, and also know at the same time that it was okay if he wanted to cry. “No one can see the full picture,” he assured him. God knew that Alain had tried, but no matter how much planning any hunter did, nothing usually went exactly as planned. Feral beasts were too unpredictable. Usually the human looking ones were a lot easier, or at least that’s how it felt to him. “I try to think of the bigger picture instead,” he explained, always looking him in the eyes. “It’s like I said, you can’t know what would have happened if someone else had ran into that troll,” and he highly doubted that those made a difference between hunters and regular folks. “This is what I always think of, and it sometimes kept me up at night,” he frowned. “What if I didn’t get them all? What if one got away and attacked someone? Someone’s mom, a child, an elder?” This was why he did this at least one out of two nights. Sometimes, he could go back home having not seen one single vampire, and on nights like that one, get rid of an entire nest of them.

“I must agree with you on that one, you’re the most lanky hunter I’ve ever seen,” laughing under his breath, Alain let go of his shoulder and took out his coffee thermos, pouring himself a cup. “I’m glad that you think that,” he smiled a moment before he took a long sip of the hot beverage. “Joy comes from knowing you got people rid of something that wouldn’t have hesitated to hurt them, feed on them, turn them, or kill them,” with vampires, you never knew. Some had their own little army of spawns, which they created by biting party goers or people walking back home after their night shift, and God did it feed his hatred for them. “What did she think she would achieve by that? I mean, it was most certainly not a cat, but clearly that thing did not attack first,” he cleared his throat. His lack of knowledge on fae was showing, but clearly, Athena had fucked up here. “I’m sorry. You know,” he paused, sighing. “You always will have a choice, but when it comes to things you cannot reason with, I’d say just do your job. It’s not easy. I know I wasn’t fond of it either then, but you get used to it. And that does not mean you’ll suddenly want to kill all the beasts you see.” Another sigh. “This is what I would do, if I were you. Not hunt, but rather get rid of threats when you happen to cross paths with one.”

No one can see the full picture. So how come anybody killed? Why did people take a life when they can’t see the full extent of how it will affect things? Orion winced when Alain’s hand grabbed onto his shoulder. Even living around friends that did the same thing, Rio still wasn't used to the nonviolent physical touch. Still cowered away from it. But knowing that this had not been meant as an attack, Rio settled into it, relaxing beneath it and eventually looking up at Alain. This time, when the tears streamed down his face he didn’t immediately wipe them away. “The bigger picture” Rio nodded to himself. He didn’t know if he believed it, but he at least understood the idea behind it. Kaden and Rio left the rest of the trolls. Sure, they had sworn their vengeance on the two of them. But were other people going to be in danger because of the actions of the two of them? The thought made him sick to his stomach. “I don’t want anything to get hurt because of me. Human or otherwise. I’m not cut out for this life, Alain. I never have been.”

Despite the serious tone the two had for the night, Orion appreciated the break for humor and he found himself chuckling through the tears and grinning. “Ha ha. Very funny.” Rio crossed his arms to feign pouting. As if being called small or lanky was something new that truly offended him. “That makes sense. I like helping people. All people.” Supernatural people included. At least Alain seemed just as taken aback by Athena’s actions as Rio had been. “I don’t know. I can’t tell if she’s just that brainwashed by my parents. Or if she genuinely wanted to hurt me. She’s mad at me. Angry that I left the house. I think she wanted me to feel her pain.” It was just a guess, but he was pretty positive he was close. “I like that idea. I just… I don’t know how to do it. I don’t want to feel like I’ve felt these past few weeks. I can’t stop thinking about that troll. I hate it.”

“I know, you have told me this before,” Alain wasn’t sure what to say to this except that few were cut for this, and that most hunters did this because they felt that they had to. Was this going to help Rio with his moral dilemma? Probably not. This was all confusing. Alain wished he had the answers, but clearly, it was not the case. Although over the years, he did gain some wisdom and the decisions he made now weren’t the ones he made back when he was a teenager or a young adult.

“Thank you,” with a smirk, he raised his cup of coffee as if to toast on this, and took another gulp. “I know, you are a good person, pure of heart. Those are rare,” and Alain genuinely believed that him not being a hunting hunter was actually a big loss for the rest of them. Hunters could use someone like Orion, who was willing to see what it’s like to be on the other end of the weapon. It was naive to think all creatures deserved his kindness however, and Alain really wanted Orion to finally accept that some things didn’t have many goals in life other than to sleep, eat humans, and sleep again. “I don’t know. I think you should speak to her, maybe not in person, but… see what she has to say about this. I doubt her explanations can excuse what she did, because that was cruel to you, but at least you’ll know why,” having cut all connection, all contact with both his sisters, Alain sometimes had regrets, he wondered if Orion would follow that path. Even though they were different, he could see some similarities here and there. “You know how to do it, you just don’t want to do it,” tossing the last drops of coffee in his cup, he screwed it back onto the thermos. “It’ll pass. This much I can actually promise you. And I don’t make promises I can’t keep,” he breathed through his nose, amused. “I’ll show you my notebooks, if you want. So you can see all the things I’ve seen,” maybe it would help him picture what hunting was really like when you did it for others.

People told Orion that a lot. That he was a good person. That he was innocent. Rio didn’t feel pure of heart. He felt complicit to the evil things that his family did. He felt like a murderer. Most of the time, he felt like a fraud. Someone that was desperately trying to do good deeds to make up for the bad he had been a part of. “I know you’re right, but I really don’t want to” Rio groaned. The last thing he wanted to do was talk to her. But Alain was right, obviously. Even if it meant learning the truth and cutting the ties. He needed to know. Eventually. For now, he needed the space. Rio wasn’t sure he wanted to ever learn how to do it. Or get over these feelings of guilt. As soon as he did, would he turn into the exact monster that his parents had spent their lives trying to create? But regardless, Alain had the best intentions. He truly wanted what was best for Rio. That was something he couldn’t say about the adult figures in his life growing up. “Thank you. Seriously. I don’t know who else to talk to about this stuff. I-“ he perked up at the idea of reading Alain’s notebooks, “Really? Like really really? That’d be so cool. Let’s do it.”

Before Orion had the chance to move, a sound off in the trees beyond the steps caught Rio’s attention. His body stiffened immediately, freezing in place as Rio tried to pick up on any other sounds with his hearing. When he heard another cracking sound off in the woods, Rio jumped into his feet. “Something’s in the woods.” He stared at the trees. It was dark, but Rio’s vision didn’t mind the darkness. He stood until he saw a flash through the trees and he jumped back, almost tripping into Alain. It wasn’t until the first thing broke through the clearing of the woods that Rio could finally make out what it was. “It’s a spawn.”

“..” Alain couldn’t exactly project his own regrets on Orion, and if the young man prefered not to speak to his sister, Alain was not going to argue with that. He had given him his advice and now, it was up to Orion to either follow it or not. The boy seemed a lot more excited by the idea to have a look at the older hunter’s notebooks. He heard that he thanked him, but his attention went toward something else. Something was nearby, he could feel it. His hand reached out to grab the sword on the ground.

Orion had been just as quick to notice, and that did not go unnoticed. Even if the boy wanted to deny his hunter heritage, he would never be able to get rid of his instincts. “The woods, huh?” Obviously, he was hearing things Alain couldn’t, and Alain was glad he could count on his cat like vision to catch a glimpse of whatever was lurking in the woods. Damn fucking spawns. “It is a spawn, or well… spawns. They aren’t lonely creatures, unfortunately,” Orion had a few options. Either help Alain with those, or watch the hunter get rid of all these foul beasts. “Time to choose if you want to help or not. Look into my bag, you’ll find weapons,” he motioned toward the mausoleum, where he had left his things.

If the number of spawns was not critical, help was never negligeable, and it felt like a good occasion for Orion to see that not all things deserved to live, and that sometimes, saving them was putting them to rest.

Time to choose if you want to help or not. Orion had not wanted to have to make a choice that quickly. He eyed the bag that Alain had pointed towards. “Oh god, oh god, oh god” Rio scurried up the steps and towards the bag. The swords, daggers and stakes were all sharp to the touch, and dangerous in the hands of someone like Rio. He was a liability, more likely to end up stabbing himself than being any help against spawns. He chose the least dangerous weapon he could find, an average wooden stake, and hopped back down the steps, stopping just feet behind Alain.

He was the vampire expert, so of course he had been right when he said that they traveled together. Orion should have picked up on it. That the noises out in the woods were created by multiple creatures, not just one. Now, a few jumped back and forth between the trees while others were already in the clearing and heading towards the two of them. Rio didn’t deal with vampires. Not that he dealt with much of anything, but vampires and the undead were his lousiest subjects. Rio studied them, maybe seven or eight total but it was hard to keep track from the way that bounced around, weaving between each other. Rio couldn’t move. His knees were shaking and threatening to give out completely. He was just going to slow Alain down. Risk him getting hurt trying to protect him. This was all a big mistake. “I don’t- Don’t get hurt protecting me, please.”

“It’s fine,” Alain did not need someone panicking in his back, and he would not wait for him to get his shit together either. The first spawn spotted by Orion reduced to dust, the hunter moved toward the second, keeping them from approaching the boy. “Orion, you have to trust that you can do it. I wouldn’t ask you this if I didn’t think you could do it,” technically, he had no idea if Orion could do it, but one thing was sure, if he told him that he couldn’t, Orion would never try and that would be a damn shame. Obviously, he would never be an excellent hunter, but if he could help keep humans safe at his own scale, it would be enough.

“Look around, don’t let them get in your back,” Alain trusted that if Orion listened to simple advice like that, he would be okay tonight. And if he wasn’t completely repulsed by all of this, maybe the hunter could actually offer to train him, eventually.

“Orion, I’m going to be fine either way,” Alain did not want to force him to do anything, but rather push him to make a decision. In the end, hesitating was what could get you killed, and maybe this would be what he would have to first teach Orion.

A spawn lunging for the hunter’s throat, Alain held up his sword, shoving it through its body. Falling to the ground, he pushed the spawn off of him, but before he could get up, another one was coming for him. Fuck.

Alain wasn’t forcing this on Orion. There was a choice to be made. One that Rio would have to make for himself. It was so radically different from anything that Rio had been used to growing up that he felt a bit dizzy from the freedom. His parents never acted like there was a choice. In the woods… well maybe Kaden and everyone else had been right. Maybe there really hadn’t been a choice that night. That no matter what he did or said, those trolls were going to attack the two of them and Rio’s only choices were to fight back or get killed. Tonight, Alain was giving him an out. That freedom was liberating, but also crippling. Because now Rio actually had to choose.

Orion was pretty sure that he wouldn’t be able to do it. He was convinced that he would just be a distraction, and when the moment came he would hesitate and not be able to make the kill. Even if these things were clearly not human. They didn’t have the thoughts or feelings that people did. They truly were just creatures led by bloodlust and instinct. Rio felt his grip on the stake loosen, his resolution wavering. A spawn lunged at Alain and the two tumbled on the ground. Rio twitched but didn’t move. Seconds later, a sword went through the creature and Alain shoved it off of him. Rio breathed with relief but his grip tightened when another one came up fast, running for Alain who hadn’t yet gotten back to his feet. “Alain!” this time, Rio ran without thinking. He headed straight for Alain, close enough that the spawn was ready to attack before Rio dived into him.

Orion and the creature rolled once hitting the ground, both fighting for the upper hand. Unsurprisingly, it was the spawn that ended up on top. It clawed at him, scratching and tearing at his hoodie and catching on his skin more than once. It’s fangs were bared and aiming for Rio, Rio using all of his strength to keep the thing away from him. Rio’s legs flailed out from under the creature, trying to get some footing to get the upper hand. He had been training with Adam. He should be able to do this. But he was losing the battle against this spawn. Finally, he pulled a leg free, lifting it around to wrap around the spawn and pull it to the side and off of him. He pressed down, using his leg to pin the spawn and fumbled for the stake he had dropped in the struggle. With all the chaos, Rio didn’t have time to think about that choice he was so enamored with earlier. He swung the stake around and plunged it into the creature, dust exploding from it almost immediately. And suddenly the struggle was gone. Rio sat there on the ground and breathed heavily. He dropped the stake and stared at the pile of dust. Though he didn’t have much time to dwell on what he had just done, considering another spawn tackled him from behind.

Alain had just started to accept that Orion had taken his decision, that he would not come and help him, when the exact opposite happened. While he had a few things to say on the boy’s technique, now was probably not a good time. Besides, spawns were not the kind to wait politely for their turn to jump at hunters’ throats. It was hard to keep an eye on Orion and at the same time take care of them. Clearly, this short moment had been enough for the experimented hunter to have exactly what he had warned Orion about, happen to him.

The claws dug deep in Alain’s shoulder, in his side, and he had to drop his weapon to grab the vampire with both his hands, and throw it to the ground. A stake to the heart later, the hunter was glancing once again at Orion. It seemed like the boy had taken his decision and had thoughts about it, but now was not exactly the time for hesitation. And so Alain saw the spawn rushing toward the young boy. Ineluctable.

“Orion,” Alain warned, too late. Now getting rid of something that had the higher ground was a whole different kind of job, and with yet another spawn coming for him, Alain hoped Orion would have the will, the strength to get rid of it, in the meanwhile, the hunter would try to get rid of the few spawns left, as he wasn’t sure a 3rd spawn was something Orion could survive tonight.

Orion’s body was pressed against the ground, the spawn on top of him and it’s claws digging into his back. The pain was sharp, the panic even stronger since he couldn’t move. He wiggled against the creature’s weight but only managed to crawl out slightly before the claws dug in further. He cried out a bit at that one, the sudden increase in pain taking him by surprise. Rio could hear the creature’s snarls, saliva dripping from its mouth and down on the back of Rio’s head, dripping down his neck. He was close, probably about to bite. Purely on instinct, Rio threw his left elbow back, connecting with the creature’s face and causing it to screech in defiance. It perked up, it’s hold on Rio loosening just enough that Rio could shove himself out from under the creature to break free. The claws had not completely dislodged, and scraped across his back on the way out, tearing at his clothes and ripping at his skin.

The first thing Orion did once he got back to his feet was find Alain. He was fighting off more Spawn, still going strong. He must have taken down so many already while Rio had barely managed to stab one. And now, Rio was left weaponless against the current spawn. He could see the stake, abandoned across the field. The spawn blocked Rio’s path. Reaching it would be next to impossible, especially with the damage the creature had already done to Rio. He had three options here, run for Alain and hope that he could save the day. Try to fake out the spawn and get to his stake. And with the creature stirring and looking particularly unhappy, Rio didn’t have much time left. He went with option three, darting off in the opposite direction towards the tree line of the woods. The spawn was fast, hot on Rio’s trail and swiping out towards him. The claw caught on Rio’s leg at one point, almost knocking Rio over. Instead, his palms caught against the grass and he pushed himself back into his run. He all but collided with the tree when he finally got to the woods. He dug his fingers into it, finding a weak spot and ripping off a section of the bark. It wasn’t much, but it was still wood.

There was something utterly terrifying about not knowing how Orion was doing. All the slayer had to know what was happening, is sounds. He heard the boy cry, then the creature protest. There was no way of knowing what happened. The spawns rushing at him made it impossible for him to check on the boy, and Alain was starting to regret putting him in this situation. Maybe he should have locked him up in the mausoleum instead.

Each cloud of dust felt like counting down to when he’d be able to check on Orion. 3, 2, 1 spawn left. Orion’s spawn. Alain was not the kind to panic, but he couldn’t put the feeling in his chest on anything other than this. And so, the few seconds during which he searched for the boy and the spawn stretched into eternity to him. “Fuck.”

Maybe it would have been better to let him handle the spawn on his own, but considering what he had heard just seconds ago, he was not going to take a chance, and so he rushed to the woods, catching up with the pair. “Oh putain,” grabbing the beast from the back, the slayer threw it to the ground. His stake found the heart and they were all gone. But their trouble? Alain was mostly fine, safe for a few scratches, but Orion?

Carefully, because he’d seen how he had reacted to the hand on his shoulder earlier, the hunter approached the young man. “Let me have a look, please,” the claws had torn both fabric and flesh, exposing skin, scarred skin. How? Orion did not … fight. “How did you… When?” They looked quite old, and Alain was growing confused, and horrified.

Orion hadn’t noticed that he had been shaking until Alain crept behind the creature and took it down, staking it and finally leaving the open field empty aside from the two hunters. Suddenly, Rio couldn’t hold onto the piece of tree bark any longer. It slipped through his trembling fingers, cracking into smaller pieces against the ground. Rio followed soon after, resting against the tree next to him and sliding down it until he was resting on his knees. The pain from his injuries were nothing more than a dull pain in the back of his brain. Everything felt numbed, a humming taking the forefront of Rio’s attention as he tried to process the fear. Those spawns had been terrifying. He had seen them in pictures, read about them on multiple occasions. He couldn’t imagine being attacked by one of those with no knowledge of the supernatural. The idea was nightmare inducing. Even with the experience Rio had grown up with, he still wasn’t sure he’d sleep much tonight.

Orion was vaguely aware that Alain had started to creep closer towards him, muttering a French curse word. Rio stopped himself from calling out the language, just as he had done with Kaden once before. Rio twitched as he got closer. Because he knew what was visible, what was coming. The injuries from today had been rough, but surface level. A quick cleanse and bandaging session and they would be healed in a few days. But Alain didn’t mean those injuries. The spawn’s claws had done more than tear at his skin. They had stripped away the only defense Rio had. Now, he had no choice but to sit here, completely exposed. “It’s nothing....” Rio tried, feeling his body slump even further in defeat. His body was still shaking, his voice joining in on the instability. “It’s from training and stuff. They’re all old anyways.”

Having knelt down to get on his level, Alain fell silent watching Orion. He tried to think, to think and think again, but he could not think of one thing to tell Orion that could have solved anything. Sitting on the dry leaves, the hunter was not sure whether to avoid or search for the other hunter’s eyes. He felt bad for making him help, for asking this of him when he knew so little about his past, his experiences. It was time for Alain to take a decision however, his turn.

“I’m so sorry,” he spoke softly.

His heart had sunk in his chest. It seemed to be doing that a lot lately. Maybe it would bury so deep that the hunter would finally stop feeling, who knew? Now did Alain want to stop feeling? Sure it would have been easier, but feelings were what made him human, not a monster. The answer was easily found. “Orion, you told me that you had found ways to skip training,” from the way he fought, you could tell that this had not been a lie. That thing about his injuries, however, felt like bullshit. “Now skip the bullshit. What happened.”

If Orion wanted to hear terrible stories from long ago, Alain would be happy to provide, but right now, he was worried for the young hunter, and he was not going to let him get back to wherever his home was like that. “You know what, you can tell me this once you’re all patched up,” there was no need to talk about this in the middle of a cemetery. It wouldn’t be long before the wind would start to carry ashes their way. “You can get up, kid?”

More people had learned about the scars than Orion had ever wanted. Some by accident, some on purpose. Orion hated seeing their initial reactions. The initial confusing followed by the horrified understanding. The pity. Rio had spent so much of his life in fear of people seeing them. “I couldn’t always skip the trainings” Rio shrugged. That was the core of the scars, wasn’t it? Battle wounds from the trainings his parents had forced him and his sister to endure. Punishments if he didn’t participate. In some ways, skipping the trainings proved to be more harmful than brawling with his twin in the first place.

Alain didn’t force the story out of him. At least not yet. His priority seemed to be the fresh wounds on Orion’s skin. “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.” Rio wasn’t, but physically he could move. On shaky legs, Rio used the tree to pull him back to his feet, and fell slightly behind Alain as the two walked. He fiddled with the torn sleeves of his hoodie absentmindedly, distracting himself from the pain in his calf and the pit in his stomach. “Do you have an extra shirt I could borrow?” Rio asked, acknowledging that both the hoodie and shirt he had on underneath would be too damaged and blood stained to salvage. At this point, Rio supposed that it didn’t matter if Alain only had a short sleeve to offer. He had already seen the scars. Was there anything left to hide?

“You got all of those only from training?” Alain had trained as a child, but he did not recall having this many scars then. Even after years and years of hunting, he probably did not have as many. The thought made his blood curdle. His parents might have been the way they were, as far as possible from loving, or caring, they at least understood that you did not learn anything through pain and suffering. Obviously, they would have been happy if Alain had ever decided to drop out of hunting, but the hunter’s desire to fit in had always been strong, and to this day, he had yet to find people who made him feel like he belonged. Nic and Kaden did that, in a way, Evelyn did too, in another, and in yet another way, Orion made him feel less lonely, even though their struggle was different. And so, the tone he had used could only tell one thing : he did not believe that training could do that. Not the kind of training he had, at least.

“I’ll give you mine,” it would probably be a lot too large for the boy, but that did not matter much right now. The hunter in his undershirt, handed the plaid shirt to Orion and went to gather his things, kicking at a pile of ash on his way to the mausoleum. Fucking pest. “I’ll get you home, okay? Give you that reading I promised you earlier, and if you want to talk about this, we can talk about this. If you don’t want to, that’s fine. Just know that I can help.”

Orion shrugged at Alain’s question. How else was he supposed to answer that? They both knew the answer. At least, Rio was fairly certain that Alain knew what the both of them were avoiding saying. He grabbed the shirt that Alain shrugged off and handed to him. “Thank you.” Rio held onto the flannel for dear life, using it as an anchor to keep himself from going into full panic mode. “I’ll uh- I don’t want to get blood all over it. So maybe I should like, wait until I can get the wounds washed off.” He didn’t want to ruin Alain’s flannel. From what Rio could tell, he seemed to really like his flannels.

“Seriously? I can still read your books?” Even with the pain Orion was in and the panic he felt, Rio couldn’t help but perk up at the thought of getting a look at Alain’s notes. Vampires weren’t exactly Rio’s specialty, and what he did know about them he wasn’t sure applied to all different types. Learning about the differences would help him decide. “I- Thanks for helping me. I don’t mind talking about it.”

Alain looked over at Orion and shook his head. “I am very well versed in getting blood from clothes. That should be part of hunter training,” he remarked, smiling at the kid a little. There was no need to be grim and sad the whole way back to his place. “Now you put that shirt on and you stop being silly. I’m not afraid to use elbow grease to get stains out,” he explained.

Orion’s reaction to being offered books to read drew a laugh out of the hunter. “That was both incredibly endearing and scary,” Alain admitted. That kid was really committed to gathering knowledge, much like Alain was with fulfilling his duty. “Alright, then why don’t you tell me what you want to tell me.”

#wickedswriting #c: alain #chatzy: alain #chatzy #lets get down to business #abuse mention tw

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motleyfuckingcruee · 5 years ago

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2.5: The Aftermath

Henley's P.O.V

I lay curled up in Sasha's spare bedroom. I haven't left in what feels like months. Turns out I've only been here for a week. I can't feel a thing. I'm uncomfortably numb. I can't even cry anymore. It seems that my body can't spare anymore tears. Now I just stare off into space, feeling emptier than ever.

After I ran from the guys' apartment, I ended up at Sasha's. I knew that she lived in the apartment above the bar, so I grabbed the spare key and made my way up to the small apartment. Luckily she had a spare room. I didn't even have to ask if I could stay with her. She immediately asked if I wanted to stay. I felt terrible for asking her something like that, but she didn't seem to mind.

I have no idea what to do now. I'm all alone. I tried calling my parents the night I arrived. They just told me I was now disowned. I'm not apart of my family anymore. I'm abandoned. Eventually I'll call Tommy and ask if I can stay with him, but for now I'll stay here. I hate to bother him.

I just can't believe that that jackass would cheat on me like that. Does he really have his head shoved so far up his own ass that he thought I wouldn't be upset if I knew? I fucking hate him. I never want to see him again. I can't believe I ever loved him! I loved him so much I was willing to follow them to Los Angeles when they went. I'm sure Steven is upset with him.

Steven.

God, I miss him so much. He was my best friend. He was my brother! Now I'm probably never going to see him again. I don't remember the apartment's number, and I don't plan on leaving this room for a long time. I miss Steven and Bella so fucking much. Why'd everything have to go down like it did? Why'd I have to fall for Duff? Why was I so stupid?

"Henley?" Sasha's soft voice says. I feel the bed dip down beside me. "Honey, he doesn't deserve your tears."

I sit up, pulling my legs to my chest. I rest my chin on my knees. I sigh. "I'm not upset just about Duff. It's that my parents disowned me, meaning I'll never get to see Nico again. And I probably won't ever see Steven again. He was my best friend! I'm not even sure if I'll see Madeline again. I'm sure she'll be with Steven, who's bound to be around Duff." I feel the tears prick at my eyes. "I gave everything to him."

"Henley, I'm so sorry. I didn't realize what all you did for him," Sasha says, a pitying look in her grey eyes.

"I was such an idiot. None of this would've happened if my family stayed in LA. I'd still be hanging out with Athena all the time. We'd probably go visit the Crüe and bother the shit out of them. I'd be happy."

"Think of it this way," Sasha starts. "What we go through shapes us as people. It shapes how we act and our outlook on the world. Judging on what you've gone through, I've no doubt you're gonna protect yourself and not trust as easily. That's a good thing though. Just don't completely shut yourself out from the world, alright? I don't want to see you self destruct."

I smile at her words. She's like my mom, even though she's twenty-seven. I have someone I can trust in this world other than Tommy and the Bass' after all. I get on my knees and hug her tightly.

"Thank you," I whisper, feeling her arms wrap around me as well.

"Anytime, hun."

We stay silent in each other's embrace for a while longer. Without warning, she stands up, causing me to fall onto the bed.

"We need to get you out of this stuffy room," She says, standing with her hands on her hips. "Get dressed and come down to the bar. You can hang out for a little bit. I'm sure Colin and Sebastian miss your company." I groan. "Don't try to fight me on this one Henley Baxter."

I stand up, reluctantly leaving the warmth of the bed. I stretch, walking over to my closet. There's gotta be something in here. I grin as I find one of Steven's shirts that I accidentally took when I went and got my stuff. Luckily, none of them were there when I got everything. Bella was there, though. She was happy to see me.

Anyways, I slip on the oversized shirt. I grab a pair of ripped skinny jeans and my doc martins. I put everything on, and go to the bathroom. I look over my appearance. I look pretty good. Well, my body does.

I brush my teeth quickly. Ugh, I hate the taste of toothpaste. I grab my brush and run it through the tangles of my auburn hair. I look at the finished product, trying to decide if I need to straighten it or not. I decide not to since it looks fine with my natural waves.

I walk down the stairs towards the pulsing music. I open the door at the end of the stairs and end up in the madness of the dancing bodies. My eyes widen, instantly feeling uncomfortable. Normally, this would be my scene, but not tonight. Probably not for a long time.

I make my way towards the bar. I smile as I see Sasha pretty much screaming at Colin and Sebastian for messing around while they're supposed to be working. As soon as she's done scolding them, however, I see the smile that creeps onto in her lips.

I sit down on one of the stools in front of Colin. I grin. "Where can I girl get a drink around here?"

Colin turns, and his eyes widen. "Henley!"

"Hey!" I giggle as I can see how badly he wants to jump the bar to hug me. But, he knows that Sasha would chew his ass out for it.

"Sasha told us you've been holed up in her guest room for the past week. Is everything okay, darl'?" He asks.

"Let's not talk about it, alright?" I say, feeling the sadness creep back up. I shake my head and look back up at him. I grin. "Can you get me some vodka?"

"Yes, ma'am," he grins, turning around to get me my drink.

I have the urge to look over at Madeline and I's usual table, but something is telling me not to. I don't know what's making me want to look over. I give in to the curiosity.

I turn my head to see Duff, Steven, Hyde, Madeline, and two other people I don't know sitting at the table. There's a girl and a guy. The guy had rather tan skin and chocolate brown hair. The girl is a bit pale and blonde as can be. That must be the girl that he cheated on me with.

My eyes wander to Duff. His eyes are locked on me. I can see the guilt in his eyes from here. That motherfucker.

I turn my head back as I hear the clink of the glass being set on the bar. "Thanks."

"It's actually a suicide. You look like you need it," Colin says, grinning.

I smile. "Thanks, Colin."

I take a gulp of the strong drink, hesitantly standing up. I walk over to the table that used to bring me joy. This was the table that I met the guys at. This is where it all started.

I stand in front of everyone. "Hey guys," I say with a venomous smile.

"HENLEY!" Steven screams. He basically jumps over the table to engulf me in a bear hug. "I've missed you so much!"

I giggle, hugging him back. "I missed you too, Stevie."

"Where have you been?" He asks, worry filling his bright blue eyes.

"I've been here."

"You poor thing! You've been sleeping on the bar. You don't even have a bed anymore! Come back, I swear-."

"Steven, Sasha has an apartment above the bar. I've been sleeping in the guest room," I giggle.

"Oh," He says. Even in the dim lighting I can see his cheeks turn pink.

I smile at him as he goes to sit back down. I turn to the two unknown people. "I don't believe I've met you two."

The guy speaks up first. "I'm Cal."

"Nice to meet you," I say, even though my focus is purely on the bitch in front of me. "And you are?"

"Mandy, Duffy's girlfriend," She says, cuddling into him.

I feel the jealousy and hatred flare up in me. Jealousy that Duff's not mine anymore, and hatred that Duff found a slut to cheat on me with. It's obvious she's a slut by the low cut dress she's wearing. And the fact that I can see her underwear.

"You're Henley aren't you?" She continues. "Too bad he wants me more. I don't get why he was with you in the first place. You don't have anything to offer him."

"Hey-!" Stevie tries to interject.

"I'm prettier, more experience. I totally get why he'd want me more."

I feel the tears prick my eyes. "Fuck you," I say to Duff and Mandy.

I throw my drink on Duff, then turn on my heel. I run to the door to go upstairs. I run up the stairs and to the phone. I dial the only number I know by heart, and the only person that can save me.

I wait impatiently for the phone to quit dialing. I need it to quit dialing.

"Hello?" The voice says.

"Tommy?" I cry.

THE END

-----------------

A/N: I honestly don't know what to say. I've been working on this book for months, and I can't believe it's over. There will be a sequel called Lips Of An Angel. I don't know when it will be finished. Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed. Goodbye.

Tags:

@the--blackdahlia @sugar-content @sharon6713 @siliwanoel @charlyallise @lo-bells @lauravic @livingdeadharley @kawennote09 @ozzypawsbone-princeofbarkness @hllywdwhre @abbysdogcollar @nikkisixxwiththebass @waywardprincess666 @tommyleeownsme

@rock-n-roll-soul-frankie @unholy-brat @eak1996 @madsthegroupie @sinningsixx @ Kissyourrosegoodbyemotley

Rocket Queen:

@knockemdeadgirl

#duff mckagan #rockband #classic rock #rock music #rocknroll #steven adler #guns n roses #duff mckagan fanfiction

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sanders-sides-fics · 5 years ago

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physics and why are you in my room

Here’s my fic from @spookyson-zine!

Warnings: Anxiety, Food Mentions, Eating, Possible Disordered Eating Related to Anxiety, Poor Coping Mechanisms

AO3

Masterlist

Words: ~1500

-Tumblr where’s my line break?-

To say that college was exactly what Virgil expected would be correct. Here he was, halfway through his second year and unable to make a single friend. He knew it was partially his fault. Virgil didn’t make many attempts to befriend anyone.

Most of the time his anxiety drove him to stay in his dorm or to seek refuge in one of the quieter sections of campus. The ones no one else went to.

He couldn’t stand to eat in front of others, with his mind screaming at him that people were staring every time he took a bite. So, he sat in the back, far from anyone else. Even then, his brain created wisps of people, watching, staring, judging.

The quietest, emptiest parts of the library weren’t safe for him. Every move, every turn of a page, was too loud. He was loud. Noisy. A nuisance to anyone attempting to get work done. He always fled within an hour of arriving, driven away by his paranoia.

His room was hardly a safe place, but it was the best he would get. His loud roommate, who never seemed to sleep or cease his renditions of Broadway and Disney, made sure of it. At first, Virgil tried to befriend him, but the singer was too much for him.

Virgil sighed as he approached his dorm. Classes were in full session and the never-ending work weighed down on him. He wanted nothing more than to collapse on his bed and sleep the semester away. Not that he could. Virgil worked too hard to get into college to allow himself to give up.

There was so much work to do, but maybe, Roman would take a hint and be quiet today.

Approaching their shared room, Virgil could hear no music. No Hamilton, no Mary Poppins, no Moana. Just silence. Roman was at a party? There was no other explanation. It was Friday night, so it made sense.

Virgil put his key in the door and let himself in. He glanced around the room and spotted his roommate, asleep on his beanbag chair. To this day, Virgil had no idea how Roman hid the large chair when the RAs did their random safety inspections. As long as Roman didn’t get caught and blame it on him, Virgil supposed it didn’t matter.

Seeing Roman asleep didn’t surprise him, he knew Roman had to sleep at some point. No, what surprised him were the two other men on the beanbag chair. One snuggled into Roman, asleep and the remaining sat on Roman’s other side, reading a physics book.

The man looked up to Virgil and, taking note of where he was, shut the textbook. He fixed his tie and sat up straighter on the beanbag.

“Salutations. I’m Logan Nox, Roman’s friend.”

“Virgil.”

Virgil stepped around the beanbag that took up much of the floor of their room and set his backpack on his desk. He could feel Logan’s eyes trained on him. He shuddered and did his best to ignore it. It was hard to, but soon enough Virgil sat down in his desk chair and pulled out his books.

“You take Physics 119?” Logan asked. “I do as well, though, I’ve never seen you before.”

“I, uh, sit in the back,” Virgil turned in his seat to face him.

“Perhaps you could join me, next class, I sit in the front row.”

Virgil doubted the professor would appreciate Virgil scrolling through his phone while he sat in the front. At least in the back, Virgil wasn’t a distraction to other students. If he sat in the front . . . everyone would be able to see him.

“It is understandable if you don’t wish to,” Logan told him.

“I’ll . . . get back to you on it.”

Virgil couldn’t think of a valid reason to turn it down, besides his fear, and that wasn’t something he wanted to share with one of Roman’s friends. If he could just avoid Logan in the lecture, things would be easier.

Logan nodded his head, “Of course. I didn’t mean to impose.”

Beside Logan, Roman shifted in his sleep and slung an arm around Logan. He mumbled about a dragon and a witch before pulling Logan closer and settling back down. Logan let out an amused huff of air.

Virgil turned back around and began to work.

“Looooo, don’t let the Dragon Witch get you,” Roman whined in his sleep.

Logan laughed quietly, “She won’t, Roman. Sleep.”

Roman hummed and shifted on the beanbag, making the third man let out a quiet huff as he readjusted in his spot.

On Monday, Virgil managed to avoid Logan in their physics lecture. It wasn’t hard. Virgil almost always came a minute before the lecture started and most seats were taken by then. He took a seat in the back, the most-empty section. If Virgil had wanted to sit with Logan, he wouldn’t have anyways. There was no way he’d draw attention to himself by walking all the way to the front of the lecture hall.

Trying to pay attention, Virgil put his phone facing down on his lap. The “desk” on the seat wasn’t big enough and Virgil already had a hard time writing on it, since he was left-handed. It didn’t take long for the lecture to start and for him to slowly grab his phone and begin scroll through Tumblr.

So much for paying attention.

The lecture went by fast. Virgil mindlessly wrote down the notes while he played on his phone. At the end of class, he shoved his notebook into his bag. Physics felt like a waste of an hour, given that he sucked at math and it had nothing to do with his major.

At least the lecture let out in time for him to eat lunch before the rush. He’d memorized the times the dining halls were busiest and if he left now, he’d be able to eat and leave before the lunch rush started. He hated eating while the dining halls were busy and specifically structured his schedule around the times he knew they wouldn’t be.

“Virgil!”

Virgil tensed at the call of his name and stopped putting on his backpack. He looked up to see Logan walking swiftly from the front of the lecture hall. Virgil debated running but decided against it. It wouldn’t do much when Logan was friends with his roommate. Running would only intensify the confrontation when it inevitably happened.

He set his backpack back down and waited for Logan to get to him. It didn’t take long.

“Hi, I, uh, came late.”

“There is no reason to lie, Virgil. However, I wanted to extend an offer to eat lunch with Roman, Patton, and I. We normally eat now, when I get out from this lecture.”

Virgil bit his lip. He wasn’t sure why Logan would make the offer after acknowledging Virgil’s refusal of his last one.

“Roman relayed a desire to know you better. And Patton’s . . . Patton.”

Virgil’s eyes widened in surprise. He hadn’t thought his roommate cared much for him at all. In their brief talks, Roman overwhelmed him and Virgil pushed him away. And after a while, Roman stopped trying to have those talks, choosing to focus on the two other friends he met.

Should he go? Virgil wasn’t sure. He managed to get through the last semester awkwardly slipping in and out of his shared room but had another entire semester before him. Attempting a friendship with Roman and his friends could improve the situation, make him for once comfortable in his own room.

But it could make Virgil’s life much worse. Rather than ignoring Virgil, or the occasional greeting from Roman, their interactions could turn to hatred. Roman had the power to make Virgil’s existence a nightmare if things turned sour.

Virgil knew he had no reason to worry about that. Roman never purposefully tried to hurt him, even if his constant noise was overwhelming. Not that the knowledge stopped his mind from running in circles, weaving together scenarios in which Roman did try.

Although, if Virgil never tried, neither outcome from attempting to befriend Roman again would matter. And Virgil would slip into his junior year, unnoticed, friendless, just as he had this year.

“I-I’ll come,” Virgil blurted out before he could talk himself out of it. “Let’s go before I change my mind.”

“Are you uncomfortable going? There’s no need to agree, if it causes distress.”

“It’s fine. I was going there anyway, Logan.”

Virgil shifted in his seat, anxious thoughts coiling his stomach too much for him to eat. The familiar fear of judgment breathed down his neck, only now the people around weren’t made up.

He picked at his salad and glanced around the table. Virgil was sure he’d catch some hint of disgust, something that showed he messed up or was unwanted. Yet, there was none.

Across from Virgil, Roman was animatedly telling Patton a story, waving a fork around in the air to mimic a sword. Patton listened attentively, eating a breadstick from the dining hall’s pizzeria. Logan looked on fondly from behind the book he was pretending to read.

No disgust.

Virgil took a breath and allowed himself to relax the slightest. He stabbed a tomato with his fork and brought it to his mouth as his appetite started to return. Maybe he could do this after all. If anyone noticed him begin to eat, they didn’t say so.

General Tags:

@ahoardofsides

@peanut0303

@iris-sanders-athena

@evilmuffin

#my fics #Virgil Sanders #Sanders Sides #Logan Sanders #Roman Sanders #Patton Sanders #College au #Disordered Eating tw #Food mentions #Food tw #anxiety tw

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nothingofnotereally · 5 years ago

Text

Unpacking the Mother of Skeletons

So I was just talking to some friends about this page and those references, and my psychology degree-possessing butt started explaining the wire mommy reference, which led me to researching the other references, and now I’m going to unpack them here for your benefit.

Before I do this, let me be clear that I am not agreeing with Grant Morrison or his portrayal of Talia nor am I agreeing with this use of these cultural, religious and social sciencey references. Just trying to break down what he’s getting at here.

Ahem.

So the context is this: Morrison’s Talia is 1. On a rampage of destruction because Bruce won’t date her and 2. Rejecting Heretic’s desire for her love and approval. Noteworthy: Heretic is Damian’s clone, so he is her genetic son.

Okay, here we go... in order, except for Kali which is last because boy is that a reference to unpack.

Tiamat: Okay so Tiamat is a goddess, in this case the ancient Mesopotamian goddess of creation, the mother of gods and monsters. She gives birth to the gods, but her husband realizes they want to depose him, so he wars against their children and their children destroy him, and then Tiamat wages war on their children. She is ultimately killed but not before creating the dragons who have poison in their veins instead of blood... but anyway I’m pretty sure the point he’s getting at is that her progeny rebels against her and she in turn wages war on them. This may also link back to the final bits of Batman Inc where Ra’s is set to unleash Damian’s clones - Talia’s unnatural children. Dragons with poison instead of blood, metaphorically.

Medusa: This is a stupid reference because the actual myth (at least the ones I’ve personally encountered) is that Medusa was r_ped in the temple of Athena. And Athena decided to act like a Greek God does, blaming the victim and cursing her to become a monster. Not super relevant except that Morrison has previously referenced this as the story of a beautiful woman who became a monster after her love was rejected - no idea where he got that from, but I think that’s fairly self-explanatory in the context of a Talia who has gone warpath because Bruce won’t date her.

The Wire Mommy: So I’m pretty sure this is a reference to the Harry Harlow rhesus monkey studies in the 1930s. So basically this was a study conducted in, I believe, the University of Wisconsin-Madison, where Harlow got some babby rhesus monkeys and removed them from their mothers and placed them in one of two primary environments:

An inanimate substitute mother made of wire holds food and a similar substitute made of terry cloth is without food.

An inanimate substitute mother made of terry cloth holds food and a similar wire mother does not have food.

Okay so the findings of this study were basically that the baby monkeys didn’t like the wire mother. In the case where the food was with the wire mother, they would go over and eat and then dash it over to the terry cloth mother and cling to that one.

What I gather from this, especially in the context of the above where Heretic is looking to Talia to love and nurture him, is that she’s saying that, despite having given him life and physically supported him (in other words, having the metaphorical food), she has no warmth or love for him. She is made of wire and without comfort or softness.

The Red Queen: I’m not superfamiliar with the Alice books beyond Wonderland so I did look this up on Wikipedia as well. Therein lies this quote from Carroll:

The Red Queen I pictured as a Fury, but of another type; her passion must be cold and calm - she must be formal and strict, yet not unkindly; pedantic to the 10th degree, the concentrated essence of all governesses

So, again, a comparison between Talia and a cold, dispassionate anger/hatred, and a female/maternal figure without warmth.

Mother of Skeletons doesn’t seem to be a specific reference - if you’ve got one, feel free to drop that on me, too, but I couldn’t find anything. I’m guessing it’s another way of reiterating this point that she is a destructive maternal figure who devours or destroys her unworthy children.

And finally...

Kali: Kali is a major Hindu deity, the wife of Shiva, and one of the more famous Hindu gods. Please note I am not Hindu, I’m not going to front as some kind of expert and if you know better than me, feel free to correct me. Anyway, Kali has many aspects, some of which are extraordinarily destructive and some of which are less so. To find out which one he’s specifically referencing all we need to do is look at the art, though:

Kali’s most common pose in paintings is in her most fearsome guise as the slayer of demons, where she stands or dances with one foot on a collapsed Shiva and holds a severed head. She wears a skirt of severed human arms, a necklace of decapitated heads, and earrings of dead children, and she often has a terrifying expression with a lolling tongue which drips blood. --Ancient History Encyclopedia

So okay looking at Wikipedia because I’m lazy... some relevant references, and you’ll see how the other names she gives for herself back this up:

Rāmprasād comments in many of his other songs that Kāli is indifferent to his wellbeing, causes him to suffer, brings his worldly desires to nothing and his worldly goods to ruin. He also states that she does not behave like a mother should and that she ignores his pleas:

Can mercy be found in the heart of her who was born of the stone? [a reference to Kali as the daughter of Himalaya] Were she not merciless, would she kick the breast of her lord? Men call you merciful, but there is no trace of mercy in you, Mother. You have cut off the heads of the children of others, and these you wear as a garland around your neck. It matters not how much I call you "Mother, Mother." You hear me, but you will not listen.

To be a child of Kāli, Rāmprasād asserts, is to be denied of earthly delights and pleasures. Kāli is said to refrain from giving that which is expected.

So, a mother who, having been born of stone herself, lacks mercy and warmth. Given Morrison’s take on Talia’s background and her relationship to Ra’s... self-explanatory pretentious reference. But that’s not all:

Vamakali is usually worshipped by non-householders. The pose shows the conclusion of an episode in which Kali was rampaging out of control after destroying many demons. Shiva, fearing that Kali would not stop until she destroyed the world, could only think of one way to pacify her. He lay down on the battlefield so that she would have to step on him. Seeing her consort under her foot, Kali realized that she had gone too far, and calmed down.

Okay this is super relevant because one thing that people often miss about Morrison’s Talia is that her acts of destruction are ultimately meant to get Bruce’s attention. She undertakes this villainous rampage because he only pays attention to villains: she doesn’t even think it’s interesting, she mocks her own plans and calls them stupid. She says she’s doing this because Bruce prefers things black and white and over the top.

And in the end, she shows up in the Batcave, declares that they’re going to fight to the death, and then has a passionate kissing session with him...

...seriously, everyone remembers the kiss but no one talks about how Bruce is still into it.

But anyway, so they make out, and she poisons him...

...then declares she’s doing all this as a gift to him, expresses frustration that he doesn’t understand, and demands that he beg her for help.

Here’s my point: she’s not actually trying to kill him or take the world down. She’s trying to force Bruce to submit to her, at which point she would feel satisfied and come back back from the edge. As evidenced by her earlier panels expressing her frustration that he won’t stop or admit defeat.

In fact, a great deal of what she does in Batman Inc. seems to be done to elicit a specific response from Bruce - for example, she has a hit put on Damian, but it’s really just to mess with Bruce’s head, it’s not really meant to result in Damian actually dying. I would say this comes back to this idea that the opposite of love is apathy not hate - love and hate are both intertwined and Morrison’s Talia both hates and loves him, or rather loves him until she hates him and hates him until she loves him.

This reminds me, one day I should write a thing about how Morrison’s Bruce/Talia story is basically a tragic romance and Talia is the actual love interest of his run... or should I because I don’t really want to be the person who writes longass meta about runs and interpretations that I actually hate.

Anyway, SIGNING OFF AGAIN, it’s...

Me!

#talia al ghul #dc comics #batman #fandom meta #batman meta #grant morrison #have i mentioned that i hate grant morrison's talia #because i do

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littlemeowmeowschimmy · 5 years ago

Text

Betrayal [Seokjin x Reader]

credit: littlemeowmeowschimmy

Requests opened // m.list

Genre: Angst // Romance // Mystery // Fantasy

Summary: “I got a pain in my backbone, where did you get that knife from? Why the hell is it so covered in red?” - Raise No Fool Set it Off

wc: 3.2k

A/N: Small confession: I’m having a hard time with requests right now. Mostly those asking of reactions. There are a few in which I am uncomfortable with and I’m having a struggle in asking myself I want to write them or not. I apologize for the lack of content and the quickness in getting to requests. It’s been so far a rough summer. I hope y’all can understand.

»»————-　★　————-««

The world around started to haze. The weight of the previous battle starting to slowly creep in. Leaving everything dizzy, fuzzy, and harder to process. How did this happened? Why did it happen? Slowly moving upwards, you found yourself leaning against anything that would give you support. Your fingers ache, your throat dry, your head swirling. If only you could pray to the gods, they would come and help.

Yet, you knew that wasn’t about to happen. Everything was thrown to hell when it came to them. They didn’t care about humanity, nor did they care what happened. Instead, they were often so self absorbed within themselves that if something dire had happened, they wouldn’t bat an eyelash. You cursed Greek, pulling yourself together, ultimately grabbing another arrow.

Your father was Apollo. God of poetry, archery, the sun, and other things you could care less. You had only met him once, and you absolutely hated him. He was stuck up, bratty, and simply cared about himself. Anything a mere “mortal” did was beyond him. He only cared about what time he needed to go and rest so he could pull the sun up.

Since he left when you were extremely young, you mostly had to fend for yourself. Leaving you to take care of your dying mother, until she passed, and then taking care of yourself. Since you ran away from your uncle’s place, you were bouncing in between shelters and other places you could muster. How you found out you were his daughter?

That was a different story within itself. You knew you were a demigod. Seeing things other could not, having a harder time reading your native tongue, and having monster chasing you wasn’t the best. Somehow, you ended up in Camp Half Blood in New York. Making it easier to train, learn how to deal with your powers, and ultimately finding out your brat of a dad was Apollo.

Panting, you glanced around at your companions around you. Noting that they were all...just as bloody as yourself. You had to admit, this minotaur was nothing like you had ever seen before. He was guarding an ancient cave your group had to sneak into. One of the gods had found themselves trapped inside, and you were sent on a quest to rescue them.

Saving them was easy, leaving was harder. Since the god had no intention on helping your crew, they vanished instantly. Thanking you for your hard work and of course leaving you to find your way out. Typical of gods, as previously mentioned. You wanted to curse them for landing you in this place, but you knew you weren’t going to get any good outcome if you had.

Realizing that the minotaur was certainly eyeing you with curiosity, you quickly grabbed your arrow. Since it was your last, you wanted to make sure you landed it perfectly. Sending a quick prayer to your “good” ol’ dad, you pulled back the string, aimed your arrow, and sent it flying.

Being behind a bow and quiver was something hard to describe. The feeling of lining your shot, sending the arrow flying, and all the steps in between was well a rush. Just as playing music, or healing someone. Sadly, you couldn’t relish in your delight because you had to quickly find away out. Secretly, you wished you were the daughter of Athena.

Mostly because you could easily strategist and fool someone. You were often one to be on the sidelines, assisting rather than going front line. Getting up close to your enemy wasn’t as satisfying as watching them die from an arrow shot just a fifteen feet away.

The arrow lodged itself in between the minotaur’s eyes. A loud howl erupted it’s mouth, it stumbled backwards. Giving you enough time to hobble over to your hopefully alive comrades. You rolled the first body over. His once beautiful slim face covered now in bruises and blood.

He was a child of Aphrodite, so he really looked beautiful in anyway possible. Jimin was more of a fighter than a lover when it came to his mother. He argued with her often, in prayer, and decided to learn swords fighting rather than charm speaking. He could do all spells children of Aphrodite did, however, he decided to rebel against his mother most of the time.

Some deep hatred for her built in his system, one you couldn’t explain yourself. He was your closest friend, helped you through a dark time in your life. Even offered to teach you how to swing a sword, but you kindly disagreed. Sending his beautiful face into a sorrowful one. Now, he was groaning in pain, covered in blood and bruises.

“Where’s Adam?” Jimin whispers, not quite loud enough for you to hear. You move in, pressing your body closer as he repeats yourself. Adam, the fierce child of Ares, was his lover. He wasn’t going to allow Jimin to roam around the country without him. Even if that meant protecting the one he loved, up until he passed out that is.

Adam was the bravest of small group. He charged in first, protecting his boyfriend and best friend. Barking back orders to run, but Jimin stood his ground. You decided to stay because it would look awful if you ran away without them. Glancing to the side, you saw your friend sprawled out on the ground. His wounds were worse and he needed your medical attention.

“Over there,” you whispered back, pulling yourself away so you could attend to him. Jimin pushed your hands away, gesturing you to check up on Adam. It seemed like he insisted that you take care of him first, but if you went over Adam would have insisted on you taking care of Jimin.

So you stubbornly healed him to a point were you felt satisfied. Handing over your ambrosia for him to snack on. Since the minotaur was still howling in pain and preoccupied, you knew you couldn’t stay forever. You were fine taking care of them, because getting them out only mattered to you. And yet, your head was still swirling and your gaze fuzzy.

If you had stayed up longer, you would possibly get captured. Or worse

Die.

You weren’t going to see Hades’ gates today, and that was a promise on the river Styxs.

»»————-　★　————-««

Just as you had predicted, you were collapsed seconds after healing your friends. Jimin and Adam tried to carry you out, only to be captured by the raging minotaur. How he had gotten the arrow out from in between his eyes was a surprise to you. Your quest was a success, but returning to camp was a failure. The phrase in the prophecy

The hungry beast Shows no mercy To those mighty heroes Tricked by gods Only to be captured No hope to be found

Was starting to make a whole lot of sense now that your back was pressed against Jimin’s and Adam’s. You three were bound by rope and thrown into the back of a pick up. Your eyes were covered, mouths sealed by cloth and wrists bound. You were stripped of all your celestial weapons, left with your stained clothes and half healed bodies.

From the front, you heard bickering in a different language. Latin, you presumed as you couldn’t fully understand what they were saying. Because of your Spanish lessons in school, the Latin based language was useless. You cursed at the gods, knowing that you should have taken Latin over Spanish. But it was too late because you, were off on your own. Stuck in the back of a pick up with an angry many speaking quickly.

Jimin nudged on your right side, then his left. Checking to see if you were awake, and expecting a nudge back. Since you couldn’t make a noise, you ultimately nudged him. Adam following suit, as you could feel his weight shift. You now thanked the gods that he was okay. The last you saw of him, he was blinking before your head hit the ground.

Or so you thought it did. Since you had no recollection of what passed, you had to go on their words when they could tell you. Just a few seconds after you awoke, the pick up stopped. The drivers side opened, slammed and the back opened. You heard a few more Latin phrases being murmured from under whomever your capture’s breath was, and you were back on your feet.

Since Jimin and Adam had more strength, they used it. Letting you lean against them, your legs still wobbly and your mind trying to piece everything together. What was annoying was the prophecy kept spinning around and around. Making it harder for you to concentrate on your own issues at hand.

In a barren waste A goddess will be found Her radiance Released from captivity

The hungry beast Shows no mercy To those mighty heroes Tricked by gods Only to be captured No hope to be found

Out of the dark Comes a comes A child of Aphrodite Their deceitfulness Eventually betraying All

The last part didn’t make any sense. Hell, in the beginning none of it made sense. You were only told that Aphrodite, was captured in a cave somewhere on the West Coast. How she got captured was beyond you. Jimin didn’t like the small encounter with his mother, nor did Adam with Ares when he came to deliver the “good” news.

Jimin was beyond furious when she left, thanking the group and leaving you all to fight the “hungry beast” as Cassandra, for told. As the boys trudged along, the prophecy continuing to swirl. Making it harder for you to put one foot forwards, then the next. Yes, you were tricked by Ares, something you had come up with in the cave.

Aphrodite had told her story. Relying how she was sunbathing on the beaches of Spain, then was later woken up by a sleeping minotaur. She hadn’t recalled how she got here, passing it off by sleep walking through the Labyrinth. However, you assumed that Ares was behind this. He didn’t seem all that worried when giving the quest.

Yet, you couldn’t chop his emotions up because he didn’t show much. Even when seeing his son, Ares didn’t congratulate him. Instead, he just slapped him on the back and left. Adam’s relationship with his father was much worse than yours and Jimin’s combined. Ares wasn’t a good father, as for told by Adam. He was unforgiving, wasn’t emotionally attached, and arrogant. You could relate to arrogance and brattiness since Apollo’s head was far up his ass.

But yet, your heart strings tugged with Adam. He was the “problem” child of his family. Because of Ares’ strength and ill tempter, he had gotten himself expelled a lot. Even ran away from home to find himself in camp. Then the stubborn child of the war god eventually found Jimin.

But since you were so hazy and dizzy, your memory wasn’t as sharp. You had used all the powers you were given by your bratty father. It had been a long while since a strong child of Apollo had walked the earth. You could do everything a normal child could do, plus a few extras. It was probably apart of Apollo’s way of saying “You were his favorite”

But never showing any love. As you were continuously trying to concentrate your efforts into walking, you heard a low murmur. Sending you through another maze of hazy memories, pushing out the prophetic lines, and making sure your feet continuously hit the ground. When your party stopped, that’s when you did as well.

It was there that your blind folds were removed. Out in the summers heat you felt somewhat calm. Something about feeling the sunlight hit your skin, the heat radiating, and blue skies always calmed you. Whether that was taken from your father, you couldn’t understand, nor did you want to. Instead, you glanced around, trying to scope your surroundings.

It seemed like you were in the middle of a dessert. Which one, you couldn’t tell. It was high noon, meaning the dessert was hotter than usual. Leaving your palms to instantly sweat due to the close confines of your bonding. Surrounding you were large men holding celestial bronze weaponry. Due to the sunlight you couldn’t quite frame out their faces.

Not only that, but it was certainly because your eyes were adjusting to the new found light. Moving forwards, shifting your head to the side, you saw a figure approaching. Their height seemed familiar, their presence as well too. The closer they got, the more your heart sank. Soon that small blob turned into a familiar face.

That familiar face brought you back. The strawberries were fresh on Half Blood hill, the breeze felt nice as it was a wonderful sunny day. Your head was resting against his lap. His long fingers drumming against your thighs. Being a child of Aphrodite certainly had their perks, he would often tell you. Setting the mood was easy enough for him, and he did everything differently.

“We should run away together,” he whispers, your body rolling over and then pushing yourself up. You had been at camp for your entire life. You grew up here, going on quest, saving those, and training younger ones. You were about to age out of there, but never had you thought of leaving. This was your safe space.

“I don’t think that’s possible...” You answered bringing a hand over to rub the back of your neck. The boy in front of you, was yes, a child of Aphrodite, but he was your first love. You could travel the world with him, give anything for him, and he would do the same. Or so you assumed he would, but you had nothing to believe that he wouldn’t.

Through your haziness, it was hard returning back to reality. Some of that faint memory was repressed, gone for a while. Leaving you to stare in aw and confusion. Seokjin hadn’t changed since you last saw him just a few years prior. When he spoke of leaving, you thought he was absolutely insane. The amount of rings around your neck showed how much you cared for Half Blood.

Seokjin loved that about you. How passionate you were in every little thing you did. He helped you through one of the darkest times of your life, transforming your hatred into optimism. That kindle of friendship was turned into passion, then soon love. You had fallen hard for Seokjin, leaving you awe struck when you saw him before you.

A child of Aphrodite Their deceitfulness Eventually betraying All

That phrase hit you like a bullet. All this time, your group was thinking that the prophacey was talking about Jimin. Who was frantically trying to make sure he wasn’t betraying anyone. Being overly cautious, checking every step he took, and even calling camp every once and awhile to check up on things.

“My lovely birdie.” Seokjin purrs moving himself inwards, dodging the glaring looks from both Jimin and Adam. They had nothing to say as they were the silent types. Their looks, could kill. You felt their anger radiate off as they didn’t suspect it either. Seokjin had flown under the radar of everyone. Getting everyone’s trust and hopes into him, only to later find out that he ran away.

Leaving without notice and breaking your heart. This had only been a few months prior to the quest being bestoyed upon you. The events of the past few days slowly started to flood back into your mind. The small talk with Ares, the dangerous quest, and even now, standing in front of your former lover. His scent hadn’t changed. The mixture of roses, expensive cologne, and hit your nose. Sending you deep into your own fears and slight happiness.

You were over joyed to see that he was okay, yet you were angry. The thought of someone you gave your entire heart to, only for him to betray you. But not only you, everyone you knew.

“I never thought I’d see you here.” he says in a pout. His plump lips protruding out like they always had. He was teasing you, because he knew that you were arriving. Ares had talked to him, he had specifically requested you. What was Seokjin planning?

“Don’t touch her.” Jimin growls besides him. For his “small” stature, he seemed make it up by his confidence and power. Seokjin pulls back, popping a hip out and looking at his younger brother.

“Here comes her body guards, ready to save her from whatever danger lies ahead.” He coos waggling his fingers. “Except now, you’re all bound together.” pointing out the obvious. Adam shifted in his stance, his fingers quickly working on the rope.

Out of the corner of his eye, Seokjin noticed this. He swiftly moves to his side, smacks his hands and tuts. Somehow, Adam had a small pocket knife hidden under his clothes. He was attempting to break free, only to get soiled and kneed in the stomach. Jimin screamed, thrashing in the tight bounds. You were left to procress everything, your body not moving a single inch.

That’s when Seokjin made his rounds towards you. Standing in front of you now, lifting your chin to his gaze. You always loved getting lost in his warm brown eyes. The way they sparkled when he was excited, dimmed when he yearned for you, and even felt like a warm cup of hot chocolate when he was simply staring off into space.

How could he betray you? How could he betray everyone?

“Birdie,” your nickname rolling off his tongue. He pouts, tilting his head sideways as his long fingers brushed against your skin. You felt yourself melting in his grasp. Almost like he was forcing you to pay attention. “Why don’t you run away with me this time?”

“I-I should.” you murmured the words almost being forced out.

“No! Don’t listen to him!” Jimin’s voice cutting through, making you blink a few times. “He’s charming you. Y/n, please just focus on my voice.” his plea was enough to break his charm. Seokjin’s fingers still around your chin. Grasping and touching you gently.

“Oh what a shame it is,” he murmurs, removing his fingers and sighing heavily now. He seemed to be looking you up and down, trying to figure out what to do with you. Instead he just waved his hand and shook his head. “We need them for bait.” then pausing. “Or maybe just one of them..”

He turns to face his men. Pointing at the two larger figures you first laid eyes on. “Take the girl, kill the others. And do it as quickly as possible. I don’t need my mother and her loaf of a boyfriend coming after me.”

“You scoundrel!” Adam pipes for the first time. “Come and fight me like a man not a coward like your damn father!” even Adam’s challenging words didn’t stop Seokjin. Instead, he turns to watch. That sweet smile that you had grown to love, was now something that brought fear and shame into your heart. He stood, waving his last goodbyes to the ones he had once called

Family.

#littlemeowmeowschimmy #bangtanarmynet #bts #bangtan #bts reader insert #bangtan reader insert #kim seokjin #kim seokjin imagine #seokjin imagine #kim seokjin x reader #bts seokjin #bts kim soekjin #bts jin #bts kim seokjin x reader #bts jin x reader

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secretiveauthor · 5 years ago

Text

4.3- Continue

Authors Note: There are only two scenes taken from the actual DBH game so if it seems a bit familiar, just know that it’s from DBH and that it belongs to Quantic Dream. I only included it so that it could keep the story going and have the options for the story as well.

~Enjoy,

Secretive Author

================

November 6, 2038

10:25 AM

================

Athena’s eyes cracked open at the dawn of sunlight slipping through the small cracks of the wooden walls. She notices that Kara has gone elsewhere and that it was just her and the little girl from earlier. The little girl sat quietly by the fire and fiddled with the hem of her shirt.

Athena rubs the sleep from her eyes and makes her way towards the little girl. Truth be told, Athena’s bones ached and demanded more rest, but Athena knew that there was no more resting after that had happened previously.

“Hello,” Athena says. “I don’t think we’ve met,” This seems to catch the gaze of the little girl. Her brown eyes looking up into Athena's green eyes. The little girl's eyes were a beautiful chocolate brown but there was just something... off about them.

“My name is Athena. What’s yours?“

“Alice...“

“Alice.” Athena smiled. “That’s a beautiful name. Reminds me of a book called Alice in wonderland.“ Alice’s eyes grew wide as it sparked her interest. Athena knew it would- or at least hoped it would- so that she could actually get to talk to the little girl and get to know her. She was human just like Athena- not that it would have had made a difference but at least there was somebody else that was like Athena.

“Really? What’s it about?“

“Well, it’s about a little girl who disappears down a rabbit hole to a fantastic place full of bizarre adventures. She meets and makes a lot of new friends along the way. All sorts of animals and she even gets to drink a little potion that makes her the size of a mouse.”

“That sounds terrifying.“

“Just wait until she-“

“Alice?“ Kara comes down the stairs. She looked like she was in a rush. Athena noticed the change in clothing and her LED was missing. I didn’t know you could take them off... Athena eyes widen at the sight of Kara as she realized that Kara looked so... human. Once Kara reached the bottom of the stairs, she grabbed Alice’s hand and started to head for the door.

“Come on Alice, we’re leaving.“ Athena was confused and followed behind them. Ralph was nowhere in sight so it was just the three of them.

“Wait, where are you going?“ Kara stopped and turned around to face Athena. She could feel her thirium pump start to beat rapidly as she grabbed Athena’s upper arm and pulled her close

“The police- they’re- “ Kara’s explanation was cut short as Ralph came in holding a dead possum. The pungent stench filled the room as it burned Athena’s nose hair. She crinkled her nose and cringed at the smell.

“Ralph found this to feed the humans. It's good for them... A present... To make up for past misunderstandings... Ralph'll cook... We will do just like humans do. Humans like burnt meat... Come! Come and sit down! “ Ralph happily waved the knife around, motioning towards the “kitchen table”; where there were already plates and cups placed down for Alice and Athena. Kara hid Alice behind her, protecting her from Ralph. Athena felt her heart beat faster, the feeling of fear rushing through her veins.

Kara and Athena looked at each other and then back to Ralph.

“That’s very kind of you, Ralph,” Athena spoke. “but we really have to get going.“ Ralphs smiled disappeared and turned into a confused frown, his LED flashing yellow. Athena’s eyes laid on the rather large kitchen knife as Ralph stood there, still having that unsure smile. It made Athena feel a bit queasy knowing that this Android could turn on them any second.

“Go? Ha ha! No, you will go once you and the little girl have eaten.” He stated. The air grew thick and dense. Ralphs' eyes looked between the three of us and motioned to himself.

“We will eat together, just like a family... You know, the father, the mother, the big sister and little sister...” Athena and Kara looked at each other again, Kara giving Athena a small nod. Athena knew what she meant and turn her head back towards Ralph.

“Okay. We'll eat together...like a family...” Athena says, giving a fake smile and walking towards the table, grabbing a seat on the opposite side of Alice. Ralph smiled and hopped up and down, walking over to the fire and placing the dead rodent in the fiery flames. The smell of burning fur filled the air, the aroma not going unnoticed. Truth be told, it made Athena want to vomit.

“That's better. Ralph went to a lot of trouble to find something for the little girl to eat. It wouldn't be polite for her to refuse, would it?”

Silence filled the room.

“Great. It's going to be great. Succulent you'll see. Succulent. Succulent. Father, mother, Big sister and the little girl.” Ralph tended to the fire while Alice looked at Kara, fear filling her eyes as she tensed up and grabbed onto the edge of the chair.

“Please, Kara. I don't wanna eat that!“ Alice whispered, hoping for only Kara to hear. Unfortunately, Ralph must’ve heard it too, or at least heard something with the sound of her voice. He stood up and looked over his shoulder.

“What did she say?” Kara panicked. She needed to come up with an answer, and fast. Kara saw the look on Alice’s face, the sheer terror on it. Kara, being the good friend she was, lied and protected Alice.

“She said she can't wait to eat it! She's very hungry.“ Kara smiled, making Ralph smile. Alice let out a small sigh as looked at Kara once more, thanking her for protecting her. To be honest, neither of them wanted to eat that. It was a rodent for god's sake and who knows where it’s been... but they didn’t want to piss Ralph off as well.

“The humans are not gonna regret it! Ralph found the best, the biggest one he could find! This is going to be succulent! Succulent!” Ralph took out the dead rodent from the fire with his bare hands as all eyes were on him and watching Ralph bring it to the table. Athena gulped and felt a small bead of sweat roll down the side of her head, staring at the chard fur and smelling the “meat”.

The longer they stayed, the less of a chance they had of escaping. Now Athena really wished she had slept in that abandoned car. Athena took a deep breath and placed her hands on the plate, gently pushing it away from her.

“Ralph, I really think we should get going.“

“All ralph wants is to eat together like a family!“ Ralph yelled, making Athena flinch. Athena bowed her head and once again, there was an ominous silence.

“EAT!” Ralph screams as he bangs both of his fists on the table making Athena and everyone else gasp and flinch at the sudden action. Now it was starting to get really tense and scary. There’s gotta be a way out of here! Athena says, looking around for somewhere to escape or at least try to keep Ralph calm so he doesn’t do anything irrational.

“I saw the body upstairs. You killed that human, didn't you?” Athena’s eyes grew wide as her head snapped at Ralph. Athena wasn’t surprised but it was unexpected and so sudden.

”What? Ralph is that true?”

“No... No, he was like that when Ralph found him...”

“You killed that man, Ralph.” Kara insisted. “There's no point in lying. You hate humans, but you're just like them. You're a murderer!”

“Ralph didn't mean any harm...!” Ralph cries and drops the knife on the table. He holds his hands and bows his head, staring at the ground his LED flickering between yellow and red. Athena couldn’t help but feel bad for the android. She knew enough about him to know that he had some type of PTSD and trauma issues. But that still doesn’t justify the fact that he killed someone.

“No...it's just that... Ralph can't control his anger... When his anger comes, Ralph doesn't know what he's doing... he... he becomes stupid...full of hatred... Ralph is sorry... He just wanted to be your friend.”

“Then let us go.“ Kara says, gently and calmly. They both maintain eye contact for a short amount of time before there was a voice coming from outside.

“Anybody home?“ It was already too late for them to escape. Athena cursed to herself and pushed herself away from the table just as everyone else did. Kara held Alice’s hand and brought her close.

“Shit..! It’s them! Kara, we need to hide- now.“

“There, under the stairs!“ Kara says, pointing towards the small gap in the stairs. Kara and Alice take shelter as Athena puts a hand on Ralphs' shoulder. She had hoped that Ralph would trust her and hope that he wouldn't rat Athena, Kara, and Alice out.

“Ralph, just stay calm and don’t let him know we’re here, OK?“ Ralph nodded and they took our places underneath the stairs, huddling together and keeping quiet. Ralph stood quietly, holding the knife in his hands.

Behind the cardboard box, they hear the policeman come in. Although, he wasn’t necessarily a policeman. From what Athena and Kara could see, it was another Android. He was tall, slim, wore a grey-ish blue suit with that bright blue armband around his arm. He skin was pale with dark brown hair. Who is this guy? Athena questioned. They’ve both never seen an android quite like him before.

He comes closer but stops at Ralph asking a few questions. Athena figured he’s some type of detective android and that’s why nobody has seen one like him ever. But now it was just playing the waiting game and hope that this android detective doesn’t find them.

But luck wasn’t on their side. After the android was done asking questions, he decided to take a look around. Each time he would get close, Athena sucked in and held her breath. Kara and Alice just stayed quiet but that was about to end. He stopped right at the stairs, inspecting the large cardboard box. All they could see was his legs... Athena closed her eyes and accepted her fate. Until...

“Run! Quick Kara!“ That was the signal to bust out of there and run. Kara pushed down the box and got to her feet with Alice by her side.

“Connor, what’s going on?“

Wait... That sounded like-

“Quick! This way!“ Kara said, running out the back door. Athena didn’t dwell on the person’s voice although it did sound awfully familiar to her. Nonetheless, she managed to catch up with Kara and Alice. Athena was a track runner back in college but she was a bit rusty due to... complications. Still, she kept up with Kara and Alice, only falling behind just a little bit.

Athena found it incredible how much stamina an android could have- well they didn’t need to breathe just like humans did. They never get tired or hungry. Truly fascinating.

“Which way do we go?!“ Athena asks, breathing heavily. Kara briefly looked back as they passed by strangers, pushing and shoving them out of the way. From the distance, they could hear police sirens slowly catching up to them.

“Just follow me! There should be a train station nearby!“ Athena nodded and followed Kara. Taking a sharp turn, they run down the alley and come across a large fence.

“What are you doing?! Let’s go!“ Athena was conflicted with herself. One one hand she can escape with Kara and Alice down the highway but it would be too risky. On the other hand, if she were to sacrifice herself it would give Kara and Alice enough time to escape.

So she stood there, contemplated what she should do.

================

--> Escape with Kara and Alice

--> Sacrifice Athena

================

#DBH #dbh connor #dbh connor x reader #dbh fanfic #dbh kara #dbh alice #detroit become human #Detroit: BH #detroit: connor #rk800 #connor rk800 #rk800 x reader #dbh rk800 #kara ax400

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pigstepmp3-moved · 6 years ago

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the writers really did buck dirty in s01e02

its the post you’ve all been waiting for—my Aggravated Analysis Of Everything That Makes Me Mad about the Therapy Scene tm, now featuring some things that show just how emotionally and mentally fucked buck is. now, i know we All hate that scene with all of our hearts (buck deserves to have a Good experience w therapy for once, but thats just my opinion), but i wanna go into detail about what exactly makes me SEETHE about that scene, complete w gifs and screenshots so i can better explain myself. im putting it all under the cut bc its kind of A Lot, so click that “read more” if you wanna read my angry complaining

alright, lets set the scene (i know we’re all aware of the situation behind this scene, but i think its important to remind you all of it). season one episode two. bucks still very much a Huge horn dog. buck has also very recently suffered his First loss on the job and its taking a huge toll on him. i think what’s most important to talk about before we get to the therapy scene itself is the scene where abby’s watching him on the news with carla.

(not the greatest quality, but that doesnt matter). he very clearly looks uncomfortable just talking about what happened in such a Casual, No Pressure setting. he says, “i was just doing my job. i’m happy we were able to help the people we helped and i’m really sorry about those we couldn’t save.” he stutters a few times as he says it, looks and sounds very uneasy, which seems very out of character for him. he’s usually super confident and chill, but as he’s asked to talk about this (most likely) traumatic thing, he kinda clams up, yknow? theres also something in his voice that reminds me very heavily of the way My voice sounds when Im trying to force back tears, but that might just be The Way He Talks

another thing that he says that really stands out to me (i dont know if this is necessarily important to the topic at hand, but i wanna talk about it so whatever) is, “. . . um, i’m sure they’re just turned on by the uniform. you know, i don’t know if they would feel that way if they saw me out of it.” ignoring the more sexual connotations to what he’s saying there, let’s talk about what he most likely meant by that particular statement. he still sounds a little nervous as he says it and kind of avoids the reporters eyes. it sounds to me like this is a rare moment of buck’s insecurities being let loose. “i don’t know if they would feel that way if they saw me out of it.” this implies, i think, some insecurities about like.. every part of himself. it almost seems like, in this moment, he thinks his only redeeming quality is the uniform. which might actually be what he’s thinking right then, ‘cause he’s still trying to figure out how to cope with his first loss. i think theres some part of him, somewhere behind that overly confident persona, that has a lot more insecurities than he shows, but thats a conversation for another day.

now, let’s move on a little from that. what i think is very important and notable about that scene is some of the things abby says after watching buck on the news. first thing she says that stands out to me is, “i’ve been thinking i might want to call him to see how he is.” she’s worried about him. i think she’s probably been worried about him since the first time he was on the news, earlier that episode. and for good reasons, i think, because later on, she says, “. . . he needs help, you know? i mean, he’s got so much pain in his face. everybody’s treating him like a hero. he doesn’t feel like a hero. as far as he’s concerned, the guy that he was trying to save fell.” like, wow, just tear my heart out and stomp on it a bunch, why dont you? its such a wonderful and apt summary of what buck’s going through. to put it rather simply, he’s fucking distraught, and for good reasons. plus, that quote is one of the Big things that influenced my headcanon of buck having depression, and i could probably analyze every single scene bucks in in this episode that have added onto that head canon of mind bc there are at least a couple different things i could blather on about, but that’s some analysis for another post (if you’re interested in me talking about that tho, definitely feel free to let me know)

now, let’s move on a little further to the Dreaded Scene (i’d totally go into the scene that immediately follows the last one i talked about, where buck and abby are speaking on the phone, but i think i’ve emphasized my point of buck going through some shit in this episode to the point where that isn’t strictly necessary). for the rest of this post, i’m gonna kind of analyze every single little thing that buck does and says in the therapy scene bc pretty much all of it contributes to my burning hatred of that therapist.

like, yeah, no SHIT, honey!! as far as we, the audience, are concerned, this is the First time he’s EVER been to therapy. in my own personal experiences, my first time going to therapy was SO uncomfortable. and just looking at buck right here makes me feel uncomfortable, too—he’s fidgeting with his hands, looks to the side, looks down, looks up at her for a moment before looking away again. this boy looks nervous as hell, and for good reasons. he confirms that he is in fact uncomfortable, and then the therapist says, “well, that’s not unusual. you’ve been through a trauma. that’s why you’re here—to deal with those feelings.” remember that, because i’m not gonna go into the importance of that quote just yet.

the next thing buck says is, “uh, yeah, i’m, uh, i’m not really into feelings.” he kind of avoids looking at the therapist as he says this, though not as much as he did in that last gif. but his voice is like... uncharacteristically quiet as he says it.

more!! avoidance!! he keeps averting his eyes, looking anywhere that ISNT his therapist. and at the end of what he says here, he clenches his jaw a little. a nervous tick, maybe? i don’t know. as he talks here, though, his voice is, yet again, very quiet. he sounds just about broken right here, and it makes my heart ache so bad for him

after a brief break to check out what athena and michael are talking about, his therapist says, "i treat a lot of first responders—people who run toward danger—but maybe there's something you're running from as well? what is it about discussing your feelings that scares you?" the answer buck gives her? a very defensive, “i’m not scared.” if youre not scared, then why are you avoiding talking about your damn feelings like the fucking black plague? and when i say that he says it defensively, i mean, like, way too defensive to Not be suspicious

we don’t get to hear anymore about that particular question because next, we’re checking up on athena and michael again, and then we’re talking about something else. the therapist says, "you lost somebody. that's hard."

as he says this, he sounds fucking SAD. he sounds completely and utterly BROKEN. throughout this whole clip, he sounds entirely broken. the therapist asks if this was his first time. he responds with, "i mean, i've had calls where it was... too late, but, uh, but i've only been doing this not even six months. now, i... i just can't shake the feeling that this one didn't need to go down the way that it did." again, he sounds like he’s hurting really badly. this loss is really taking a huge toll on him and that is Very clear. she then asks him if he thinks there was something he could have differently. he doesnt respond, just looks up at her like this:

his eyes are a little red, and it looks like there are some tears in his eyes. like wow, you could murder me and it would hurt less than seeing buck like this

now, the next snippet is about where everything Starts Going To Shit (this is also the part where i start sobbing like a dumb baby, but thats neither here nor there).

you see that shit right there?? if you listen hard enough, you can hear my heart breaking into a million pieces. from this point on, buck is CRYING. honest to god fucking CRYING. he looks like he’s hurting so badly, especially at the end of that gif, when he furrows his eyebrows. it looks kind of like he’s trying to keep himself from straight up Sobbing. i’m sure it seems almost like i’m dwelling on this for a little longer than necessary, but i think emphasizing how emotional he is in this part is very important to understand just how much the end of this scene makes me fucking SEETHE. this next little bit is where i start to transition from Sadness to absolute Rage

you see that? this is the start of my slow deterioration into madness. up until this point, everything about this therapy session was completely and entirely professional. but home girl decides, hey, yknow whats a good idea? waltzing my happy ass across the room, sitting down directly in front of my PATIENT, and resting my hand on said PATIENT’s arm. i dunno about you guys, but this seems terrible on so many levels that it isnt funny.

now, yknow what happens next? some classic avoidance from our boy. she calls him mr buckley, so he says, "it's, um... it's actually just buck." (after VERY AUDIBLY SNIFFLING by the way, but i digress). he then deflects even FURTHER by asking her if she friended him on facebook.

“i thought you looked familiar,” he says. he’s no longer actively crying at this point, but there are most certainly still some tears in his eyes.

now, do you know what happens next, after a brief break to check up on athena and michael? the worst thing that could happen happens! i know it, you know it, little miss unprofessional sleeps with buck! and yknow what she says Immediately afterwards? “i can’t believe i just did that. i am so sorry.” like.... no! saying “sorry” doesnt change the fact that you TOOK ADVANTAGE of someone who is CLEARLY not in the right frame of mind to consent to something like that. yknow what he was doing the last time we saw him? crying. bc hes in a very vulnerable place in this episode. and yeah, sure, i guess you could make the argument that he was seducing her a little, but that doesnt change the fact that this is fucked up. now, side note about me, i’m only in high school and i’ve never had any job before, so i dont quite know the ins and outs of the professional world. but i do know a thing or two about common sense, so its pretty easy for me to assume that shit like this is awful on like a million different levels. i think the power imbalance is super clear to anyone who has any number of brain cells.

now, buck being as emotionally stunted as he is, says that she made him feel better (probably just for a few minutes, but thats neither here nor there). and yknow what she says? “you should go.” remember that quote from earlier? the one that i said was important and that i was going to go into later? “well, that’s not unusual. you’ve been through a trauma. that’s why you’re here—to deal with those feelings.” yknow what buck Didnt do? deal with those feelings. he talked about his feelings for maybe ten minutes, and that’s assuming that, during the cuts to athena and michael, the session was continuing and that it wasnt a matter of like, oh, this stuff is happening At The Same Time.

and all that is just During the session. we dont ever see the aftermath of it, we dont ever see buck talking about that session or anything along those lines. and we most certainly dont see him trying to go talk to a different therapist. the rest of what im going to be talking about this post is purely speculation, but i think its highly probable that this could all be canon. like i just mentioned, as far as we know, buck hasnt gone to another therapist after that shit show. additionally, we can also assume that buck really hasnt talked to like....... anyone about the shit he’s gone through, both past shit and shit that was brought up from this first loss of his. so as far as we’re concerned, he’s never properly worked through it all. he’s also probably never gotten any proper coping mechanisms to deal with any further losses. it seems a little too morbid to think that bucks just gotten used to the feeling that comes with losing someone, so i think its pretty safe to assume that, after every single loss he suffers, he gets like..... super fucked up, purely because he never talked about (a), the reason why hes scared to talk about feelings, or (b), how to deal with said feelings, especially when they’re bad. and thats not fair to him!! that loss clearly took a huge toll on buck, Most of the description of that episode is talking about the roller coaster and bucks feelings, but he never got to heal from it. if buck doesnt get something akin to a redemption arc, where he gets to see a therapist to properly work through all of his issues, i’m going to riot

anyway. thats all i have to say on the matter. i’ve been working on this for most of the day because i have so many thoughts and feelings about the way buck was treated during this episode. i will die mad about it. but i think i’ve said pretty much all i have to say on the topic now, so i hope my frustrated rambling was interesting or whatever to read. so, thanks for reading! ♥

#evan buckley #buck buckley #911 fox #911 on fox #lemme know if there are any errors or anything? im not proof reading this bc im much too lazy and bc i just wanna post this shit already #kendall blabbers #(maybe i should make a tag eventually just for ranting like this. i dunno. we'll see)

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avicebro · 6 years ago

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Perseus: In Myth and in Fate

Hello everyone, I’m tired, we’re gonna talk about Perseus.

This is actually going to be a combination fate meta post and Greek Myth post which is you know, amazing, but that’s because Perseus was the reason as to why I got into Fate, and thus I feel like he deserves this. So, buckle up. I think that should explain my biases pretty well.

Probably the Weirdest Way Zeus Fucks a Woman

Like many Greek Myths, the story of Perseus starts with a prophecy.

Perseus’ grandfather, Acrisius, is the king of Argos. Since he likes being King, he goes to the Oracle for his future. The Oracle breaks the news that he’s going to be killed by his daughter’s son. Instead of pulling a King Laius and driving a metal rod through the kid’s feet and then leaving him on a mountain to die (that’s where Oedipus’ name comes from by the by), he decides that the way he’s going to not have a grandson is by making sure his daughter, Danae, can’t get knocked up at all.

He does this by imprisoning Danae in a bronze chamber open to the skies (in some versions it’s a tower, some a hole in the ground with a grate, it’s just gotta be open to the sky). There. No one can get in.

But unfortunately for King Acrisius he forgot about the whole “Zeus” thing so when Zeus sees this lovely woman in a bronze box/tower he’s head over heels in love with her. And again, since he’s one for theatrics, he makes the smart decision to turn into a shower of golden coins and rain down on her.

Danae becomes pregnant because of a golden shower.

Since divine seed (or coins?) must take root, Danae becomes pregnant with Zeus’ child.

Nine months after Perseus is born.

So, since the first box thing didn’t work, King Acrisius decides to put his daughter and her newborn son into another box (or more specifically a wooden chest) and put it out into the sea. Danae prays to her baby daddy so that they survive, and since Hera doesn’t seem to mind Perseus for some weird reason, they safely arrive on their new island of Serifos, where they are taken in by a fisherman.

Polydectes is a Dick

The fisherman’s brother, the King of Serifos, is Polydectes. When Perseus is grown up, Polydectes finds himself falling for Danae. Perseus isn’t very fond of this creep trying to take his mother, and she doesn’t seem to be very fond of him either, so he tells Polydectes to back off. Polydectes doesn’t take this very seriously so once more Perseus tells him to back off, no dating his mom you creep. This makes Polydectes mad. He might also be too afraid to fight Perseus 1v1 so he makes a plan to get rid of him instead.

He hosts a banquet and tells everyone to bring a horse as the gift. Perseus has no horse to give, so he says that his gift is whatever Polydectes asks of him.

(Side note: Polydectes should have just asked him to die. Nice and simple.)

Instead he asks for Perseus to bring back the head of Medusa, the youngest and also mortal Gorgon sister.

(Side note: Youngest = strongest in Greek Myths. Both Zeus and his father Cronos were the youngest children. It makes a little more sense as a story stand point for Zeus [His mom tired of her husband eating her kids at the 6th one] but with the two Kings of the Cosmos being the youngest child cemented this rule of the youngest being the strongest in Greek Myth. This of course has no relation to Hesiod’s hatred of his brother. None at all.)

Medusa has gotten a little bit of a celebrity status as being unkillable, as whomever looks at her turns to stone. This doesn’t seem to bother Perseus very much – he’s gotta make sure Polydectes doesn’t creep more on his mom, and he is the son of Zeus, after all.

The Killing of the Gorgon

Thankfully he’s got another god on his side: Athena. Yeah, I guess turning Medusa into a gorgon for something she had no control over wasn’t enough punishment. Athena wants her dead now.

So, Athena sends Perseus to the Hesperides, the nymphs who tend over Hera’s garden and also hold the fancy weapons he can use to kill Medusa. For those who know anything about Heracles he ends up convincing Atlas to go and fetch some of the golden apples for him from the Hesperides. But Perseus doesn’t know where that is so following Athena’s advice he finds the Graeae sisters.

The Graeae sisters are three old hags who share only one eye. They are also all-seeing.

(Side note: they’re also the sisters of the gorgons! Thanks sisters.)

Perseus grabs the eye and basically holds it for ransom in return for the whereabouts of the Hesperides. Since they can’t really do anything they say fine, sure, okay here’s where it is, can you give us our eye back?

(Side note: for anyone who has seen the Disney Hercules, the Graeae are kind of retrofitted with The Fates. I’m not saying that I necessarily agree with this decision, but I do understand it. It should be noted that in Greek Myth only one of The Fates actually was an old lady, because only one was associated with cutting the thread of life. But three old ladies who act independently of the gods’ will and make dated references are kind of my trash. Disney Hercules despite its shortcomings has become my trash.)

The Hesperides give him a bag, to hold Medusa’s head, Zeus an adamantine sword and Hades’ helm of darkness. Adding to the list of gods that wanted to kill Medusa and or help Perseus grows as Hermes gives him his winged sandals to borrow, and Athena gives him a polished shield. So, the list of gods that are helping Perseus are: Athena, Zeus, maybe Hera, Hermes, and likely Hades doesn’t hate him because Zeus was somehow able to get his brother’s helm for him to use. The only god that probably likes Medusa still is Poseidon. Probably out of pity.

(Side note: Adamantine! For those who have read Hesiod’s Theogony know that Cronos’ cool as fuck sickle is made out of adamantine. Oh, and also the shackles that bound Prometheus to the rock. And in some versions the walls that Alexander the Great builds? It’s an unbreakable metal basically.)

Now armed with a bunch of OP items, he heads out to kill Medusa. With the polished shield he is able to kill her without looking into her eyes. He beheads her, wraps her head up in the bag so he’s fine. From her neck springs her children with Poseidon: one king named Chrysaor and of course, the well-known Pegasus.

(Side note: Pegasus would eventually team up with another son of Poseidon to do their own story.)

Perseus’ New Bae

On the way back to Polydectes, he stops in Aethiopia (Ethiopia). There he finds a very pretty woman tied to a rock.

Like an idiot, the queen of Aethiopia, Cassiopeia, made the claim that her daughter Andromeda was prettier than the Nereids. The Nereids are basically a bunch of sea nymphs who are close with Poseidon. In response, Poseidon sends out a giant sea monster and floods. Now stuck with a sea serpent and way too much water, they go to the Oracle to find a solution. The Oracle says that Poseidon will only be appeased if they sacrifice Andromeda to the sea serpent, Ceto.

Perseus finds Andromeda strapped to the rock as sacrifice and decides that he likes her so he kills Ceto (depending on the version by the sword or by Medusa’s head). Despite being betrothed to another guy, he claims her as his bride. When the guy that she was supposed to marry interrupted the marriage, Perseus uses Medusa’s head to turn him into stone. He does that a lot.

He returns to find that his mom has been running away from Polydectes, because again, he’s a dick. So, Perseus finds him, uses Medusa’s head on him to turn him to stone, and makes his brother king instead. This works out because Danae actually liked this fisherman and so she becomes queen in some variants.

There’s a small myth in which as he was travelling some of Medusa’s blood ends up dropping onto the desert and creating a new species of killer snakes, too.

Fulfilling the Prophecy

About that prophecy.

There are three versions of how Perseus ends up killing his grandfather. The first two include being hit in the head during sports.

The first version has him not returning to Argos but to Larissa, where some games are being held and also it just happens that King Acrisius is visiting said games. Perseus shows up and is testing out his new sport he just invented (which is basically just a fancy form of the game of horseshoe) when Acrisius steps in the way and is killed.

The second has him returning to Argos, but when Acrisius hears that his grandson is returning, he goes into exile. Perseus just happens to be in the place where he was exiled to participate in funeral games. During the discus throw, it ends up hitting Acrisius, and he dies.

The third has Acrisius’ brother, Proetus, exiling his father. When Perseus returns to Argos, he finds out about the exile and as such turns his great-uncle to stone to ascend his grandfather back to the throne. Then when he’s now the King of Argos again, Acrisius accuses him of not actually killing Medusa. So, sighing, Perseus turns him to stone and fulfills the prophecy.

Nevertheless, through manslaughter or through actual murder, killing is still killing, and as such he must be exiled and cannot be the King of Argos. He takes the son of Proetus and King of Tiryns and gives him Argos. In return Perseus becomes King of Tiryns.

(Side note: this is all to prove the ideas of manslaughter and also exile in Ancient Greece. Technically, Perseus should have been exiled and then purified like Oedipus does, maybe even killed. Even more so, the son of Proetus should have killed Perseus. Well.)

He gives Medusa’s head to Athena, and she puts it on her now famous shield, the Aegis. Because cursing, then helping in her murder wasn’t enough. Thanks, Athena.

King of Mycenae

Perseus finds and founds Mycenae. As such, he’s considered to be a historical character. Perseus and Andromeda would end up being strong rulers, fortifying their kingdom and having a whole bunch of kids (7 sons and 2 daughters. I feel for Andromeda).

He actually ends up being killed by the son of Proetus, after a successful and fruitful rule. Perseus, Andromeda, and her mother Cassiopeia would end up in the stars by the gift of Athena.

These kids would end up really spreading out but the descendants to note are: Heracles, Penelope and as such Telemachus, and of course—Pollux and Castor! See I’ll tie everything to my namesake.

What Fate Did

Now we can talk about the things that fate changed. Most of the changes are what happened with Medusa. Not a surprise to anyone, the rape of Medusa has been retrofitted to Athena being jealous of her and that is why she turns her into a Gorgon. She then, in an attempt to protect her sisters, becomes more and more monstrous, until she can no longer return back. When she ends up killing her sisters and Perseus arrives with his items, she accepts her death.

Perseus, when he arrives on the island, is filled with this feeling of unease and uncertainty. He does not feel like a hero and wishes to simply kill Medusa and leave. He has regret when he kills Medusa. He finds no glory or fame in the act as it is really tricking her.

Medusa says that she does hate Perseus, calling him a brat and a successful Shinji and hating the fact that he was the one that killed her.

Perseus is the Rider in Fate/Prototype. He is specifically summoned by Aro Isemi because he wanted a hero who had a happy ending. His master has been kept alive simply to summon a servant and to be tested on. He’s only with his master for a couple of days. Before he dies, he gives him all of his command seals so that he can continue to live without him. When he dies, Perseus gets revenge by killing those who tested on him. He then becomes a master, thrusting himself into the war so that he can bring Aro Isemi back to life. Oh, and he also decides to become a student at Ayaka’s school because he’s bored or something.

Ultimately the OVA is really about Ayaka’s relationship with Arthur, and it acts to set up the love… triangle? Square? I mean there’s like 4 guys after Ayaka…Pentagram? Despite this, he does have two scenes in the script: one where he defeats Caster to save Ayaka when they launch an attack on their school, and one where he faces off with Saber.

Saber accuses him of being a murderer, as he’s being killing civilians, since he needs their mana to stay in this world. He then says he’ll punish his master, but Perseus reveals that he doesn’t have a master to punish. Saber accuses him of having killed his own master. They engage in battle, Rider almost kills Ayaka before pulling away, and then Saber helps her escape.

Nasu in the notes talks about him briefly, saying that he’s someone who gets obsessed with something to the point that it takes over him. He must give the task 110%. He also says that he’s a kind-hearted soul and puts more emphasis on the fact that he’s a hero who had a happy ending.

Let’s Get This out of the Way

When discussing Perseus in fate, the one thing that comes up time and time again is that Perseus is bad because he kills Medusa. This is not something new in fate—I’ve seen it for fans of many characters. Some characters thankfully get more characterization by fans than just “x killed y” (Like Ishtar for example). Others, like Perseus or more commonly Fionn, are mostly characterized by having killed a more popular character.

(Side note: I am in no way saying that what Fionn did to Diarmuid is okay! But again, his relationship and his dynamic with Diarmuid is what makes him interesting in America. I digress.)

By simply characterizing these characters by whoever they killed, and ignoring what they do in their respective series, it is doing a disservice to them. Especially in a series where characters may have to interact with those they killed, or are trying to repent or rebuild an old relationship with them. I am in no way trying to act high and mighty—if you want to see hypocrisy in action just go through my Avicebron tag and you’ll see me hating on him for killing Roche or even just my dislike for Jason because of Medea—but the claim that Perseus should not be in Fate/Grand Order, despite having a design, voice actor and my room lines from other servants, is silly. I want Jason in Fate/Grand Order because I want to see the relationship with him and the rest of the Argonauts outside of Okeanos and some interludes.

Like imagine if Achilles was only discussed for having killed Hector. That would erase everything he’s done in Apocrypha.

(Again, not saying that murdering these people are okay! What happens with Penthesilea is interesting and I like hearing each side’s view on it.)

What makes fate so interesting for me is that these characters who are tied by fate are given a second chance. We get to see old foes pitted against each other brought together by the throne’s cruel game. This is what makes fate grand order especially interesting—characters who murdered or betrayed each other being forced to work together. Do they despise each other and refuse to work together? Are they, like Hector and Achilles, too tired to fight anymore and as such just pull tiny pranks on each other? Do they try to rekindle their old relationship? Is it even possible for things to go back to before the catalytic event? This is what is interesting for me.

We have two compelling characters at the hands of the gods and fate pitted against each other. Medusa, the monster hated by the gods, versus Perseus, the hero who is just being used as a pawn to get rid of her. One is being remembered as a famed hero while the other as a disgusting beast. Through Heaven’s Feel and Hollow Ataraxia, and ultimately through Medusa’s eyes, we get a subversion of this.

“A Successful Shinji”

Oh boy, Shinji Matou. I won’t say that everyone hates him, and there are certainly are some Shinjis in canon that aren’t… that bad. At the same time, I won’t say that he’s a fan favourite by a long shot.

Designs in fate (at least the earlier spin-offs, whether or not this is true for fate/grand order depends on your own opinion) often tie back to other characters in the series. When Okeanos came out people pointed out that Jason’s design is reminiscent of Gilgamesh. By having a character look like another it makes one already have opinions about them. Like how you are to tie Jason with being a self-absorbed leader who probably doesn’t treat women well, by having Perseus’ design be reminiscent of Shinji’s, you are to make your own conclusions.

The main design aspect that’s brought up is the hair. Which I never got but I guess their hair is roughly the same length and is wavy? I guess when he’s in his school outfit he looks like Shinji? I guess? I don’t know maybe I’m blind.

The biggest comparison between the two is Medusa’s line in Hollow Ataraxia, where she sums him up as a “successful Shinji.”

I could go into a discussion about whether or not we should believe this claim, but instead of boring you I want to instead talk about what Medusa, and ultimately Nasu, is trying to say by calling Perseus a successful Shinji. If Perseus is Shinji, then he should be an envious, manipulative abuser who hurts those he has an advantage over. He should be trying to get approval from those he looks up to. He should be feeling as if he needs to prove something and that any bad that happens to him is not because of him, but because of someone else.

However, we don’t really see these aspects in Perseus’ character. Sure, he has this feeling that he has to prove himself, but he is a flawed Greek hero, needing to prove that he is the son of Zeus. But he is also doing this to help his mother. Depending on the version he can kill multiple people, but in some he only kills the person who was terrorizing his mother and the one he was prophesized to kill. Depending on the version, he is simply a man fighting with fate.

In prototype, we see a more complex character. He is compelled by his love for his master that he is willing to become this human killing monster who goes against everything Saber stands for. If he was truly a Shinji, then he would be doing this not for revenge, but for his own gain. He does use his advantages to try and kill Ayaka but can’t find it in himself to do so. He saves her at one point. He does not act like the self-absorbed, envious and prideful brat that Medusa characterizes him to be. Maybe his anger is bratty—but his anger out of revenge is understandable in order to bring his master back. What I’m saying is that if he truly was a Shinji, he would be doing this less for Aro Isemi, and more for himself.

Then here’s the question: why are there two versions of this Perseus? Through two series Nasu is telling us two different things about his character.

My Answer

I have a possible answer. We have an older design for Perseus, from Hollow Ataraxia. I propose that there are two Perseus servants in the canon. Rider Perseus, the flawed and conflicted hero who wrestles with his murders and his fall from grace as a hero as seen in Prototype. The one that fights for revenge on his master’s treatment. Then, a Lancer Perseus, one that exemplifies the modern view of a Greek Hero, with the cocky, Shinji-like personality. The one that Medusa and the world associates with Perseus, and the real Perseus.

Both versions of Perseus are needed in fate. Lancer Perseus acts as the cocky character some people adore, while Rider provides a realistic view. I would personally love for both to appear in Grand Order—but certainly Rider Perseus provides a more complex version of the character. He, along with Heracles, provides a more realistic view of what characterizes “The Greek Hero” and how interpretation has diverted them from their more realistic and fate-driven narratives.

I included his myth to show that he is more than just the killing of Medusa. He has to wrangle with a lot—and even more when he is summoned in Prototype. And I want to see how he and Medusa and her variants (we know from game files that Gorgon hates him) interact. One person’s dislike for him because of their own biases removes the possibility of growth and deeper deconstruction of Medusa.

I’m going to end this by reminding you all about why Perseus goes on his mission in the first place. For his mother. I refuse to believe that if, by chance, Perseus was Shinji’s servant, the two of them would have been best friends. Rather, he would have taken one look at what was happening and be hit with deja-vu.

Anyways Perseus better show up in Lostbelt.

Thank you for reading! Please come talk to me about fate I’m bored and lonely.

If you would like to read the Prototype notes, you can do so here. If you would like to watch Medusa explain her backstory and thus the story of Perseus, you can do so here. Thanks have a nice day.

#pollux discusses greek myth #pollyux writes #if you would like JUSt the fate meta you can go to 'what fate did'#/dabs #fate/prototype #perseus #medusa #fate/hollow ataraxia

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dumbledearme · 6 years ago

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chapter ten—trials and tribulations

read Child of Land and Sea here

Act II — Heart Of The Ocean

Part II — Trials and tribulations, you know I’ve had my share. But I’ve climbed the mountain. I’ve crossed the river.

Andy led Tyson to the pavilion. “Who invited that?” someone from the Apollo table shouted.

“Well, if it isn’t Andy Jackson,” said Mr D. “My millennium is complete.” He glanced at the man beside him. “You need to keep an eye for Poseidon’s spawn.”

The man was horribly thin and wore a orange prisoner’s jumpsuit. “I’m Tantalus,” he said coldly. “On special assignment here until my Lord Dionysus decides otherwise. And you, Andromeda Jackson, I do expect you to refrain from causing any more trouble.”

“Trouble? Me?”

Anthony grabbed her by the arm and dragged her away. “Tantalus is the spirit from the Fields of Punishment,” he whispered in her ear. “The one who stands in the lake with the fruit tree hanging over him, but he can’t eat or drink. He’s done something horrible to be given this fate. Don’t push your luck, Seaweed Brain.”

“Go sit down, Jackson,” said Mr D, very loudly. “I believe your table is that one over there - the one where no one else ever wants to sit.” Some campers laughed.

“Come on, Tyson,” she called ignoring the noise.

“Oh, no,” Tantalus said. “The monster stays here. We will decide what to do with it.”

“He is not a monster!” she raged. “His name is Tyson and he saved the camp.”

“Leave us,” Tantalus waved her away, “while we decide the creature’s fate.”

Tyson looked at Andy with fear in his one big eye. “It’s alright,” she lied to him. “Don’t worry. You’ll be fine. They’ll find you a good place to sleep tonight.”

Mr D and Tantalus laughed, but Tyson whispered: “I believe you.”

“Well,” said Tantalus as everyone sat quietly. “And here on my first day of authority, I’d like to say what a pleasant form of punishment it is to be here. Over the course of my time here, I hope to torture, er, interact with each and every one of you children. You all look good enough to eat.” Mr D clapped. “And now, some changes. We are releasing you from most of your regular activities.”

There was an explosion of excited conversation.

“But, sir!” Clarisse looked nervous, but she stood up to speak. “What about patrol duty? If we drop everything-”

“Ahh, the hero of the day!” Tantalus exclaimed. “Brave Clarisse, who single-handedly bested the bronze bulls.”

Clarisse blinked and blushed. “Um, I didn’t-”

“And modest, too,” Tantalus grinned. “Not to worry, my dear. We are here to enjoy ourselves and not to-”

“But the pine tree-”

“And now,” he cut, “Andy Jackson and Anthony Chase have seen fit, for some reason, to bring this here,” he pointed at Tyson. “Cyclopes have a reputation for being bloodthirsty monsters with a very small brain capacity. Under normal circumstances, I would release this beast into the woods and have you hunt it down with torches and pointed sticks.”

Andy felt her anger rising. “Now, wait a minute-”

“But who knows?” Tantalus continued. “Perhaps this Cyclopes is not as horrible as most of its brethren. Until it proves worthy of destruction, we need a place to keep it. I’ve thought about the stables, but that will make the horses nervous. Hermes’ cabin, possibly?” Silence at the Hermes table. “Come on. The monster may be able to do some menial chores. Any suggestions as to where such a beast should be kenneled?”

Suddenly everyone gasped. Swirling over Tyson’s head was a glowing green trident. There was a moment of awed silence.

Tantalus roared with laughter and the others followed. “Well! I think we know where to put the beast. By the gods, I can see the family resemblance!” Everyone laughed, except Anthony who didn’t look surprised at all.

Tyson didn’t seem to notice people were laughing at him. He was too innocent to understand how cruel people were.

But Andy understood it alright.

She didn’t mind Tyson moving in with her; they got along quite well. She could even deal with the fact that he was her half-brother. Dealing with other people’s hatred was the hard part.

Andy sat beside Anthony on the sand, in her favorite spot, watching the sea, when some jokers from Aphrodite’s cabin walked by and asked her if she needed to borrow some eyeliner for her eye.

“Yeah, good one,” said Andy raising her thumb.

“Ignore them,” Anthony suggested. “It’s not your fault you have a monster for a brother.”

Andy turned on him. “What is your problem? He is not a monster!”

He raised his eyebrows. “Don’t be mad at me! And yes, he is.”

“You gave him permission to enter the camp!”

“To save your life! I didn’t expect Poseidon to claim him! Cyclopes are the most deceitful, treacherous-”

“He is not! Stop bullying him! You’re just as bad as everyone else.”

Anthony’s ear turned pink. He stood up and stormed off without another word.

Andy wasn’t alone for long. Tyson came to keep her company. “Are you mad?” he asked softly, sitting beside her.

“Yes.”

Tyson sadly looked at his own hands. “Am I a monster?”

“Don’t say that.” Andy lifted his chin so she look him in the eye. “You are not a monsters, Tyson. Not matter what they say.”

The cyclops shook his head. “It’s okay, Andy. I’ll be a good monster. Then you won’t have to be mad anymore.”

“I’m not mad because of you.” Andy didn’t know how to make him understand. “Tyson… You don’t go around hurting people for fun like they’re doing to you. They’re the monsters! They’re the ones who should be ashamed. Don’t you ever believe what they’re saying about you. It isn’t true.”

That night Grover spoke to her in her dreams. “You have to help me, Andy,” he begged. “I’m stuck in a cave. On an island in the sea. I don’t know where exactly! I went to Florida and turned left.”

A monstrous voice called for him. Grover flinched.

“Just a moment, dearest,” he shouted back to whoever it was. “It’s a trap, Andy. It’s the reason no satyr has ever returned from this quest. He’s a shepherd. And he has it! Its nature magic is so powerful it smells just like he great god Pan. The satyrs come here thinking they’ve found Pan, and they get trapped and eaten by Polyphemus!” Grover took a deep breath. “I need you, Andy. Come help me! I’m in the Sea of Monsters.”

Then Grover seemed to remember something else. “Oh and… by the way… just so you know… I’m really sorry about this. This empathy link… well, I had no choice. Now our emotions are connected. If I die… Let’s just say, you should hurry. Don’t let us die!”

Andy ran inside the Athena cabin. The kids there looked at her as if she had a seriously contagious disease, but showed her where Anthony was hiding. He was in this tiny living room, sitting on an armchair, reading an architecture book. “I’m busy,” he said when she walked in, without even looking at her.

“We need to talk.”

“Oh, now you want to talk?”

Andy sighed. “Please, Anthony.”

Something strange happened to his face. It was like he was having this inner battle. He looked like he really didn’t want to talk to her, but something was stopping him from saying so. “What?” he said finally.

Andy told him about her dream and Grover’s message.

He sneered. “Oh, please. Like Grover would just happen to stumble across the one thing that could save the camp.”

“What do you mean?” Andy asked. He rolled his eyes. “I’m not making this up,” she insisted. “He’s in trouble.”

Anthony hesitated. “If he really found it…” he murmured, “And if we could retrieve it…”

“Can you tell me what you’re talking about here?”

He closed his book. “You know the Golden Fleece?”

Andy blinked. “Have you met me? Of course not.”

Anthony scratched his head. “Okay. Have you heard about Jason and the Argonauts at least? Three thousand years ago, Jason went to find the Golden Fleece.”

“Well, I do know the movie with that clay skeletons.”

Anthony finally smiled. “Gods, you’re hopeless. There were these two children of Zeus, Cadmus and Europa, okay? They were about to get offered up as human sacrifices, when they prayed Zeus to save them. So Zeus sent this magical flying ram with golden wool, which picked them up in Greece and carried them all the way to Colchis in Asia Minor. Well, actually, it carried Cadmus. Europa fell off and died along the way, but that doesn’t matter.”

“I bet it mattered to her.”

“The point is, when Cadmus got to Colchis, he sacrificed the golden ram to the gods and hung the Fleece in a tree in the middle of the kingdom. The Fleece brought prosperity to the land. Animals stopped getting sick. Plants grew better. Farmers had bumper crops. Plagues never visited. That’s why Jason wanted the Fleece. It can revitalize any land where it’s placed. It cures sickness, strengthens nature, cleans up pollution-”

“It could even cure Thalia’s tree.”

Anthony nodded. “But it’s been missing for centuries. Tons of heroes have searched for it with no luck.”

“But Grover found it,” Andy argued. “He went looking for Pan and he found the Fleece. We can rescue him and save the camp.”

“What if it’s a trap?”

“Do we have a choice? It’s Grover.” Anthony still seemed unsure. “Will you help me or not?”

“Andy.” He said her name in this weird, fragile way that shocked her. “Polyphemus is the worst of the Cyclopes. And the Sea of Monsters… Searching for one tiny island in monster-infested waters-”

“That’s why you have me, Wonder Boy. Daughter of Poseidon and all that jazz.”

He knit his eyebrows. “We’ll have to talk to Tantalus, get approval for a quest. He’ll say no.”

“Not if we make an spectacle out of it. Let the whole camp hear it. They’ll pressure him. He won’t have a choice.”

That night, after dinner, Andy waited until Mr D left the pavilion to speak. She called out for Tantalus in front of all the others. His eye twitched. “Something to say, Jackson?”

“We have an idea to save the camp,” Andy said, standing up. Thankfully, Anthony stood with her. “The Golden Fleece. We know where it is.” And she told them all about it.

“Nonsense,” Tantalus said when she was done. “We don’t need saving.” Everybody stared at him. “Besides, the Sea of Monsters? That’s hardly an exact location. You wouldn’t even know where to look.”

“Actually, I already do.” Andy ignored Anthony’s glare. “The Fates gave me sailing coordinates. 30, 31, 75, 12. Latitude and longitude.”

“She’s right,” Anthony frowned. “30 degrees, 31 minutes north, 75 degrees, 12 minutes west. That’d be somewhere in the Atlantic, off the coast of Florida. We need a quest!”

The campers took up the chant. “WE NEED A QUEST! WE NEED A QUEST!”

“Fine!,” Tantalus shouted. “I shall authorize a champion to undertake this perilous journey, to retrieve the Golden Fleece and bring it back to camp. Or die trying.”

Andy’s heart filled with excitement.

“I will allow our champion to consult the Oracle and choose two companions for the journey. And I think the choice of champion is obvious. Someone who has earned the camp’s respect, who has proven resourceful in the defense of the camp. You shall lead this quest – Clarisse!”

The Ares cabin started stomping and cheering.

“Wait!” Andy shouted. “She can’t go. Grover is my satyr. The dream came to me! This is my quest.”

“Right,” said Clarisse. “How silly, we’d forgotten how everything’s about you, Jackson. Thank you for reminding us.”

“That’s not what I’m saying.”

“You had your chance last year. Now beat it.” Clarisse stood up. “I accept the quest. I, Clarisse, daughter of Ares, will save the camp!”

The Ares campers cheered even louder. Anthony protested and the other Athena campers joined in. Everyone was shouting and arguing, until Tantalus said, “Silence, you brats,” in a voice that chilled Andy to the bones.

“Sit down,” he ordered. “I really do hate children, you know? Once upon a time, there was a mortal king who was beloved of the Gods! He was even allowed to feast on Mount Olympus. But when he tried to take some ambrosia and nectar back to earth to figure out the recipe, the gods punished him. They banned him from their halls forever. His own people mocked him. His children scolded him. He had horrible children. Just like you. Do you know what he did to the ungrateful little bastards? Do you know how he paid back the gods for their cruelty? He invited the Olympians to a feast at his place, just to show there were no hard feelings. No one noticed that his children were missing. And when he served the gods dinner, my dears, can you guess what was in the stew?”

No one dared answer. “The gods punished him in the afterlife,” Tantalus croaked. “They did indeed. But his children never again spoke back to him or questioned his authority, did they? Now, then. Are there any more complains before I send Clarisse off on her quest?”

Silence.

“The Oracle,” he told her. “Move along now.”

Andy sat on the beach on that spot where she was beginning to grow roots. Tyson was a little further away building a sand castle. It was almost dark, the stars were appearing. Andy didn’t know what to do. Although she didn’t think Clarisse was a failure, she felt she should be the one out there. She needed to help Grover. After all, she’d be the one doing the dying part if something happened to him.

Suddenly he was sitting next to her. He was slim and fit, with salt and pepper hair and a sly smile. Handsome, but in a goofy sort of way. “I haven’t sat down in ages,” he said. “This is kind of wonderful. Peace and quiet… Such a long time since I’ve gotten to relax. Do you have a favorite constellation, Andy?” he asked glancing at the sky.

Andy was staring; he looked so damn familiar. “I don’t know… I guess, uh, Hercules.”

“Why?”

She shrugged. “He had rotten luck. Even worse than mine. Makes me feel better.”

The man chuckled. “Not because he was handsome and brave and famous and all?”

“I don’t like people because they’re handsome,” she said, trying to keep Luke away from her thoughts.

The guy seemed to read her mind. “Really? Interesting.” He gave her such a familiar smile that made her throat tighten and she understood who he was.

“You’re his father,” she accused.

Hermes pursed his lips. “Not how I’m usually introduced. God of thieves, yes. God of messenger and travelers, if they wish to be kind. Now, Andy, what do you intend to do about the Fleece?”

She didn’t trouble herself with how he knew that. “I don’t have permission to leave the camp.”

“Did that ever stop you before?” he gave her a mischievous look. “There was a baby boy once,” he said. “One night, when his mother wasn’t watching, he sneaked out and stole some cattle that belonged to Apollo.”

“Did he die?”

“No! What kind of story would that be?” Hermes shook his head. “No. To make up for his theft, he gave Apollo an instrument he’d invented – a lyre. Apollo was so enchanted he forgot to be angry.”

“That’s nice and all but I don’t think I see your point.”

“I don’t think I have a point,” he seemed confused for a moment. “Ah! How about young people don’t always do what they’re told, but if they can pull it off and do something wonderful, they might escape punishment. How’s that?”

“You’re saying I should go,” Andy guessed, “without permission.”

Hermes handed her a stainless steel canister – an old-fashioned thermos. It was freezing cold on one side and burning hot on the other. When Andy turned it, the cold side remained facing the ocean. “A compass?”

Hermes was surprised again. “Is it? Well, I’ll be damned. All I know is that if you uncap it, you will release the winds from the four corners of the earth to speed you on your way. But don’t let them all escape at once, that could be bad.” Next, Hermes handed her a plastic bottle filled with chewable vitamins. “Don’t take one, unless you really, really need it.”

Andy eyed him suspiciously. “Why are you helping me?”

He gave her a melancholy smile. “I’ve hope that you may save many people on this quest. Not just the satyr.”

“Luke?” she offered. Hermes didn’t answer. “I’m sorry, but- He can’t- I mean, h-he hates you. He has so much anger. Why would I try to save someone like that?”

Hermes gazed up at the stars once more. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the eons, it’s that you can’t give up on your family, no matter how tempting they make it. Isn’t that what you told your friend once upon a time? People can change. But they need help.” He made two backpacks appear before Andy. “I must go now. If you ask nicely, your father might help you reach the ship.”

“What ship?”

Hermes pointed. There was a big cruise ship cutting across Long Island Sound. As Andy watched it, the god disappeared.

#andromeda #andy jackson #fem percy jackson #fanfic #genderbend #dfcrosas #heart of the ocean #child of land and sea

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justonelie · 7 years ago

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Serendipity 1

Hades kissed Persephone’s cheek before walking out of the great hall leaving her with her lover. Hades knew, he knew everything that happened in his domain; however he knew Adrian couldn’t sire kids so he saw no harm in their affair.

Zeus had decided to hold a banquet in order to discuss “something of great importance” just the thought of it had Hades rolling his eyes. “Sebastian wait for Sephonie here.”

Hades waited for the older man to nod before he pictured himself in Olympus. He never went far without Cerebus so when he appeared with the three headed beast no one flinched.

“Abeoji.” Hades’ son, Taehyung, greeted from where he stood with the other half of the rebel twins. Persephone’s son, Jimin, waved from his seat. There was no hatred for him so Hades nodded back.

Taehyung was wearing a black blazer with sequins on the lapel. He had a black silk Gucci shirt on with red dots on it. The shirt was unbuttoned to just under his chest and a shirt matching tie that was pulled down to there. His blonde hair was styled in a part and his eyes were blue today.

“Brother. Where is your wife?” Athena asked with her hand on her son, Namjoon’s shoulder. Athena was wearing a red silk pantsuit with red silk heels that had a weird jewel arangement on it. Her shield was placed in its proper place in the back of her throne and her son was sat in front of her. Her platinum blonde hair was in a bun and she had her jewel comb in it.

“She’ll be along.” Hades said and nodded towards Cerebus who quickly ran out. Hades picked up a drink making sure to reveal his diamond encrusted, red face Rolex. He had an all black suit on, but instead of a blazer he was wearing a leather jacket. Upon his feet was black leather biker boots with spikes on them. His black hair fell around his cheek bones which he knew would make Zeus mad.

“Go get your sister Namjoon.” Athena said as the boy with the artificial dirty blonde hair nodded. He stood and rebuttoned his black blazer over his dark blue button up shirt that was unbuttoned to his stomach. He quickly walked off choosing to stay silent.

Hades turned as Demeter walked in wearing a tan gown that had black lace on it. Her black hair was cut into a bob and her jewelry was a simple teardrop onyx pendant and matching earrings. On her feet were nude platform heels with jewels on them.

“Hades.” she said with a tightness to her voice that a sister shouldn’t have for her brother.

“Demeter.” he said and picked up another glass as the door opened. He turned with a smirk as every goddess gasped softly.

Persephone walked in with her arm linked through Adrian’s. She was wearing an off the shoulder black mermaid gown with small rubies sewn into the bodice and skirt. Upon her right wrist was a pure silver wrap bangle in the shape of a snake; which of course was aimed at Athena. Adrian was wearing a black T-shirt and dark blue jeans with boots and his yellow curls fell to his shoulders.

She walked over to Hades before looking at her son, Jimin. She tapped her cheek which caused him to practically bounce over and give her a kiss on her cheek.

“Hello Eomma. How are you?” he asked smiling at her. The thing about Jimin is he is absolutely pure. He loves the happy things in life; just like his mom had. Jimin had a black v neck T-shirt on that revealed his chest under a royal blue velvet blazer. His hair was silver and his smile bright. He even had a subtle pink smokey eye on. He topped the outfit off with a red and black silk choker.

“I’m doing great.” she said resting her hand on his shoulder. Upon her neck was a silver chain that held a black onyx spider that seemed to glow.

The look on Athena’s face was priceless. Persephone had managed to remind Athena that she was friends with the, once, humans that Athena punished and Seph managed to do it in a classy way. Persephone took the drink and her throne crossing her legs to reveal he knee high platform heeled boots. The heels were like spikes and it even had spikes on it. Adrian smirked from the corner of the throne room and Hades took a seat.

“There’s my beautiful daughter!” Athena exclaimed as her daughter Rebecca walked out with Namjoon.

Rebecca was wearing a short black skirt with a purple bra on. Her brown hair was piled into a bun and she had amethyst earring in her ears. Upon her neck was an owl necklace and her eyes held dark glasses. Rebecca was stunning and she had a confidence that made her brother and cousins proud. She set in the seat in front of Athena’s and to the right of Namjoon

“So where are the rest of our siblings Demeter?” Hades asked interuppting her conversation with his wife.

“Getting ready I assume.” She said turning back to her daughter.

The sound of waves interrupted Hades train of thought and the doors flew open. Poseidon walked in with his trident in his left hand and his wife, Amphitrite, on his right.

His brown curly hair was at his shoulders now and he was wearing a black blazer, white button down shirt with the top three buttons undone, blue jeans and black boots. He smelled of Sauvage and the scar on his face was prominent.

Amphitrite’s brown hair looked wavy and she was wearing a royal blue gown that had a cape attached to the shoulders of the gown. She had a dark blue sapphire dolphin ring on her right hand and her feet held midnight blue velvet heels. Upon her neck rested a beautiful black necklaces with an ocean stone and a matching wedding band. They immediately took their thrones, all business as usual. Poseidon to the right of Hera and Amphitrite to his right.

Right behind him was Aphrodite and her son Seokjin. Aphrodite was wearing a cream satin dress with cream heels. Her honey blonde hair was put up into a bun with curls hanging off of it.

Seokjin was wearing a black blazer and tie with a white polkadotted shirt. He walked to where Jimin, Taehyung, and Namjoon was and sat down starting to talk to them as he raked a hand through his pink hair.

When the door opened again the last three children walked in along with Yoongi’s “bodyguard��.

Yoongi was Morpheus’ son there for he needed a bodyguard for when he was asleep. Which he was before coming here. He was wearing a gray sequined jacket with a white button down shirt. His black hair was missarranged but as he ran a hand through his hair it straightened up.

The second child was Hoseok, or JHope. He was Apollo’s son and was like the sun himself. he was wearing a black vneck like Jimin, a dotted white jacket and a matching black and white silk choker. His hair was a vivid orange and he had his hand in the third kid’s shoulder.

The third was Jungkook he had a black striped mesh blazer with a red Satin shirt on and the first 3 buttons undone. He was Hercules’ son and often got into trouble. His brown hair was parted and he seemed to have a permanent glare on his face.

Ares shrugged past them and sat his double battle ax in the grove his marble throne held for it. He was wearing a full gray suit with a blood red tie. His Rolex had a purple face and diamonds inlayed. He sat down to Athena’s right and the rest sat as they waited for Hera and Zeus.

Zeus walked out in a light gray suit and his brown hair in a quiff. He had a sterling silver rolex on and, of course his lightening bolt in his hand.

Hera had her chocolate brown hair piled into a bun with a diamond hair comb in. She had a pleated silver dress on and diamond heels.

“Why’d you call us here Zeus?” Hades asked holding Cerebus’ chain in his hand.

“A powerful siren has shown up. Hes looking for the human.” Zeus said without needing to elaborate.

“We have to find her first.” Poseidon said and looked at the other Olympians.

“You stick out. There’s statues of you. Everyone knows what you look like.” Jungkook said earning an elbow from Namjoon.

“Do you have a better plan Jungkook?” Hera said in a cold voice.

“Let us do it. No one knows about us; so if the siren gets close they won’t know.” the caramel brunette said with a nonchalant shrug.

The Olympians had to discuss it for a while, but it was decided that the children would be the ones to find the human.

#kim namjoon #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #bts #bts greek god au

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novaursa · 7 years ago

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Imagine being Eris, Goddess of Chaos, daughter of Zeus and Hera and twin sister of Aries; and Loki being enchanted by your beauty and power.

Info for role-playing is below:

|| Biographical Information ||

"Better you battle Zeus himself, than me." - Discord

- Real Name: Eris

• Meaning of the Name: Strife

- S.H.I.E.L.D Name/Alias: Discord

- Other Aliases: Bellona, Enyo, Discordia

- Nickname: Tony Stark sarcastically named her Sunshine (much to her displeasure).

- Born: N/A

- Age: N/A

- Birth Place: Olympus

- Current Location: Earth

- Base of Operations: Olympus, possibly the Areopagus.

- Occupation: Goddess of strife and discord.

- Identity: The general populace of Earth is unaware of Eris’ existence except as a mythological character.

|| Personality And Traits ||

- Personality Types: Wicked, vindictive, judgmental, fun loving, passionate.

• Eris represents true malevolence and deviance, she has no morals of good and/or nobility. She is seen as spiteful, vindictive and passionate when it comes to the prospect of the world potentially crumbling into chaos; which she refers to as being a glorious event. She is seen enraged at the fact that she has gotten her way which shows her to not be one who likes fair and square events. Eris is also seen as wickedly intelligent and takes a dullness tone to the happy endings which often gets her into a fight with her half-sister Aphrodite.

|| Physical Information ||

- Species: Olympian Goddess

- Gender: Female

- Hair Color: Silver/White (albino)

- Eye Color: Purple (albino)

- Skin Color: Pale

• Note: Eris is an exceptionally beautiful woman who is said to look like "a vision of the good spirits in flesh, though they themselves would fear her". She has long silver hair and intelligent, piercing, lilac eyes. Eris had a soft, silken voice and is always clothed in a fine golden or red dress. She never grins, though she produces disarmingly subdued smiles. She detests flattery, because "vacous flattery is the sound of a prybar, a tool used by a thief as he tries to get what she has." Her least favorite color is pink.

|| Eris | Pictures ||

|| History ||

"She takes after her mother." - Zeus about Eris

Eris is the daughter of the Zeus, Ruler of the Olympian gods, and his wife, Hera. She often entered into the schemes and plans of her older twin brother Ares to ignite the dissension that often leads to war. Possibly as a way to cause dissension between gods and mortals, she stole the golden apple from the garden of the Hesperides guarded for Hera and had it engraved with the words, “For the Fairest.” She then tossed it among the guests attending the marriage of King Peleus of Aegina to the goddess Thetis. Hera, Athena, and Aphrodite then tried to claim the apple in the dispute that triggered the Trojan War. Her activity after that event is unrecorded, but after the war, several Trojan refugees lead by Dardanian prince Aeneas conquered the area upon Rome was built on. During the Roman Empire, Eris was intensely worshipped by the Romans as one of their most important goddesses. During this time, Hercules most often antagonized Eris as he prevented most of her attempts to cause dissent and strife among mortals.

"Discord, you are my wrath. Send their bodies to Underworld and bring me their heads." - Hades

During one of his skirmishes with mortal heroes, Hades gave Eris the ability to turn into giant tapian snake called Enyo. She has bitten heads of mortal heroes off and brought them to Hades in the Underworld. Eris later used both this giant and small form of tapian snake to spread more strife among the mortals.

In his visits to Earth, Zeus became incensed that Eris was taking an active role in exciting her followers into killing Christians in his name. He decided to break off ties with Earth and allow the worship of the Olympian Gods to fade away. Eris retaliated by assisting many of the gods eager to preserve their ties to earth into hunting down mortals. Zeus faked his death to lend credence to an end of worship of the Olympian gods. To all who had seen these events, it appeared as if the gods were dead, but Zeus had several spells in effect that any god that was killed would be restored to life. Eris in meantime tried to hold on to whatever worshippers she had, but it all ended quickly. Defeated, Eris retreated to Olympus for some time.

In modern years, Eris became intrigued by the forces of terrorism and racism on earth and even masqueraded as a mortal to stir up trouble between blacks and whites, Jews and Anti-Semitics, left and right wing liberals and other potentially controversial groups. Seeing as her brother Aries had fared unsuccessfully against Hercules, she began training her own modern champion, Centurion, as a worthy ally. She eventually sent him to kill Kyllian, a mortal man imbued with the power of a trio of Celtic Gods, many of whom the Olympian gods beheld with some enmity. After Kyllian defeated Centaurion, Eris realized that he might make a better pawn or ally than a new adversary and she vanished back to Olympus to plot her next scheme.

|| Recent History ||

"You humans are so predictable." - Eris

• Her first appearance is noted by Tony Stark; he claims that he first saw her in Afghanistan for a very brief moment not knowing her true identity. Their conversation was short and it ended with her saying, "You know what I like about you, Stark? You don’t have a heart." Then she just vanished into the thin air with misty fashion. After he was critically wounded Stark wandered more about her true nature.

• Her second appearance is after the death of Stane. Tony confronts her about past events asking was she somehow involved in all that. Her response was that he must be more specific because- "a lot of things are her fault." She then introduces herself as Eris Goddess of Discord, before vanishing once more. After the defeat of Vanko, Tony found his home in a chaotic mess and a note on his desk which said: "Discord favors the heartless." Hinting that he is favored by Goddess Eris. She appeared a few times more after that, usually to protect him stating that "nobody is allowed to decapitate her favorite mortal". She also had a few ‘interesting’ encounters with Clint Barton and Bruce Banner who aren’t that much fond of her.

|| Extra Information 1.00 ||

"There’s my Sunshine!" - Tony Stark to Eris

- Likes: Chaos, tipping the balance of good to evil.

- Dislikes: Losing, being proven wrong, defeat, nobility.

- Group Affiliation: Olympus, Ares, Hades, herself.

- Ancestry: Zeus (father), Hera (mother), Ares (older twin), Hephaestus (brothers), Eileithyia, Hebe, (sisters), Hercules, Apollo, Hermes, Dionysus, Perseus (half-brothers), Artemis, Athena, Aphrodite, Persephone, Panthia (half-sisters), Poseidon, Hades (uncles), Demeter, Hestia (aunts), Asclepius, Cupid, Janus, Deimos, Phobos (nephews), Harmonia (niece), Triton, Rhode, Benthescyme, Neptunia, Arion, Pomona, Consus, Vertumnus (cousins)…

- Common Olympian Powers And Limitations: immortality, regeneration, shapeshifting, flight, the ability to become invisible to the human eye, telekinesis, superhuman strength, stamina, heightened senses, speed and they have the ability to "teleport." Some possess the ability to manipulate matter and the elements of nature and are able to create natural phenomenon or natural disasters. They also possess a wide range of seemingly magical spells such as the casting of fireballs. One Olympian god cannot restore humans or gods to life. It took both Zeus and Hera to restore the life of their grandson, Evander. Also, most of them cannot heal others without the blessing of either Athena or Zeus. The only gods that were able to do so were Ares and Hades. Only a very few things can kill an Olympian: Hind's Blood, the Ribs of Kronos and Zeus.

- Eris’ Strength Level: Eris possesses superhuman strength enabling her to lift (press) about 25 tons under optimal conditions.

- Known Superhuman Powers Of Eris: She possesses the conventional physical attributes of the Olympian Gods. Like all Olympians, she is immortal. She has not aged since reaching adulthood and cannot die by any known conventional means. She is immune to all known terrestrial diseases and is invulnerable to conventional injury. If wounded, her godly life force would enable her to recover with superhuman speed. It would take an injury of such magnitude that it dispersed a major portion of her bodily molecules to cause her a physical death. Even then, it might be possible for Zeus or a number of gods working together to revive her. Also, she is able to make herself invisible to mortals, or only visible to one person she chooses to, which makes easier for her to plant discord and hatred in the heart of mortals, however, gods and half-gods are immune to this effect and can see her all the time. Eris does have some superhuman strength, but she is not quite the powerhouse as gods like Hercules or Ares. Her Olympian metabolism gives her far greater than human endurance in all physical activities. Eris also has limited mystical powers common to all the Olympian gods, such as shapeshifting into a tapian snake. According to her, each Olympian has personal object foraged by Hephaestus that enables their powers; hers is known as Discord’s Ribbon Device and it gives her many supernatural abilities.

"Do you really want to test my powers?" - Eris

- Her Normal Abilities: Eris has great skill in the use of all the implements of war used in the time of ancient Greece and Rome.

|| Discord’s (Clawed) Ribbon Device ||

"Put your hand down!" - Clint Barton

Discord’s Ribbon Device, is a multifunctional Olympian apparatus foraged by Hephaestus. The hand device is a gold colored, forearm-length glove worn on the left hand of the user, with a red gem in the center of the palm. It is controlled by a neural interface and is powered by DNA in the user's blood, functionally rendering it impossible to use except by Eris. The device has numerous functions with a variety of controls on its surface that can be used. It can also wirelessly control Olympian technology, triggered through a button on the back of the palm.

|| Discord’s Ribbon Device || Its Abilities ||

- Conducting a scan of a human - though it is unknown what the scan actually detects.

- Firing a powerful kinetic energy wave, capable of throwing grown humans several meters with significant force. It can potentially kill the target if they impact a solid surface nearby.

- Shooting a deadly fiery energetic neural link that connected to the brain of another person with the intention of torturing or killing them.

- Creating an energy shield that encompasses and protects Eris from harm. This shield only stops things that are incoming at high velocity and blasts. Arrows and thrown items go right through the shield.

- Paralyzing a human.

- Giving Eris ability to use pyrokinesis and telekinesis.

"You never were one for flowers." - Ares to Eris after she burned down Persephone’s garden.

|| Extra Information 1.05 ||

- Theme Song: Everybody Knows by Sigrid

-Signature Look: Seen can usually be seen in a golden or red dress. Most commonly, however, she is seen in black armor.

- Her Sacred Animals Are: Tapian snakes and Hydras.

• Note: Hera raised three Hydras. She sent first one to kill Hercules, and the last two she gave to Eris.

- Love Interest: Loki

|| Discord’s Quotes ||

"Glorious chaos."

"I'm missing some excellent chaos here."

"Every argument has two points of view. Otherwise, there would be no room for discord. Think about it."

"You are far too hard on yourself, my dear, sweet, mortal friend. What would the people do without you? Dance? Sing? Smile? Grow old?"

"The last time I was this bored I took hostages."

"No! You can't take away my power!"

"Only two of those times were my fault."

"The kid was raised by wolves; until she killed them and ate them all…"

"I’m a simple girl who’s into anarchy and chaos. I also enjoy walks during sunset through battle-torn wastelands."

"Do you want to see the face that launched a thousand wars?"

|| Quotes About Discord ||

"Discord is here?! I hate it when I can’t see her!" – Clint Barton

"Discord thinks only of discord." – Tony Stark

I’m looking forward to role-playing this very much. You can send me an e-mail if you are interested: [email protected] -much love, NovaUrsa

#thor #loki #thor odinson #loki laufeyson #avenegers #tony stark #zeus #ares #original character #oc #roleplay #rp #imagine

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shadowfae · 3 years ago

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I don't depend on other folks for validation, though - I'm much past that, and that's halfway why I want to leave. Because having to deal with them not accepting me is just wearing down on my patience, not my confidence. Leaving would be me giving up and stop waiting for other people, because that's what I'm doing by staying, is waiting to see if it's worth it to do so.

While "maybe online isn't the place for it" makes sense as a theoretical standpoint, it's simply that there is no place that I can see, right now, that isn't alone with my fiance and their system. The problem is that what actually hurt us isn't what we want to talk about. South pointed out about ten minutes ago that he's of the opinion that unless "the lot of these morons up and decide to be okay with me talking about the relationships I had with Athena Sasha, Master Alone, my sister, and the rest of the harem; they ain't fuckin' worth talking to at all", and I can't say he's wrong. None of those were traumatizing to him, although the moment he talks about it he's going to get death threats and suicide baited and told he's a pedophile and all sorts of other bullshit that has no place being said.

For you, you don't really like talking about the cannibalism part, and that's fine, but that's not what I mean here. I mean the things that are most certainly fucked-up, but are just a part of things. I'm not exactly traumatized over everything that happened with the Princess, and I know for a fact it'll bring comfort to folks who have to deal with similar canons. I also know I'll get hatred in my inbox up the wazoo for it, hence why I haven't bothered.

I take anon hate incredibly well, it doesn't really bother me, I grew up in the antikin rhetoric of death threats and ableism and people asking me to my face if they can shoot me because I think I'm an animal. But the fact that I get it at all goes to show that either I'm in the wrong goddamn place entirely or the community is no longer accepting things that aren't sanitized and perfect.

I actually got a fellow panelist banned from this year's Othercon because my panel about monstrosity pissed them off enough to vent about how I'm an evil abuse sympathizer in the fucking general chat. They apologized, but only after the admin had to kick them from the con entirely. And I was being incredibly goddamn tame about it, and the farthest I got into actually dark content was very briefly skimming across how morality was different in one of my canons, and how I see morality different now because of it. They were not the only one who was pissed off about my panel, and I was holding back more than I ever should've been expected to.

I would love to just exist, but that isn't how it's worked out. Either I lock things down so nobody can find me, or I accept that I'm going to get hatred and death threats and horrific words slung in my direction for talking about it.

I agree with you on that folks want to post positive stuff - I make a rule to not reblog anything negative going on in the world on my main blog because I burned out too quickly doing that - but sincerity and positivity aren't the same thing either, and I flat out do not see sincerity or respect for others way too much. It's one thing to joke about your identity - hell, I'm an edgy knockoff Vocaloid and I will make fun of myself for it - and making a joke of the entire community with the implication that we're all just putting on masks for fun.

I'm fine with the former. Not so much the latter, and the latter is all I see.

That's my problem. Now whether that's a me problem or a community problem, well, that's what I'm still trying to figure out. Either way, I'm not happy about it, and I want to stop feeling that way.

Genuine question - I'm curious to know what you mean by most of what you hear now "isn't fictionkin." Do you mean it in the way that most people who say they are fickin are actually just kff/DA? Or do you mean it more in the respect that most of what fickin are describing as experiences don't line up with actually being fickin? If it is the latter, can you give an example of what you mean?- because I want to actually understand your viewpoint.

I've been in otherkin community for a while, but I'm coming to terms with being a baby fictionkin and want to understand more.

I'm gonna start off the bat by saying I barely know what the hell KFF are talking about with delusional attachments, because every description they have of it sounds like endelity and by extension psychological fictionkin to me. It also reeks of "the only way you can be fictionkin is if you're secretly A Crazy who needs to be locked up" and that absolutely does not sit right with me. Endels and psychological fictionkin are fine and amazing in my book, but it really sounds like this is something that cuts deep and disrespects them something major, and I can't say I approve of it.

I do mostly mean that KFF describe themselves as fictionkin when they're distinctly describing something else. I think what was the best explanation I found of them is a type of role play you usually do as a youngish teenager (note the space between role and play here), where you project your identity onto a role, stereotype, or character in order to feel out what you are, and discard it the moment it's unnecessary.

I did that as a young teenager, had a whole shtick about making a dragonwolf pack with some friends out on a camping trip, wrote myself as a self-insert into lots of stories feeling it all out. But while it was both introspectional and shallow, it was not otherkin to do that, it was not even close. It was a natural part of growing up in a human body, that everyone does, that is a part of being aware that you have an identity and not everyone is exactly the same as you.

It's fine to do that, but it isn't otherkin - it may be argued to be a form of otherlinking, but I would argue it isn't even that, because linktypes go down to the bone just as often as kintypes do, and the form of role play that KFF seems to be most certainly isn't that.

Now, there are folks who chose linktypes and later find that they can't put it down again. Technically, I did that with my Ranisson kintype, got myself tangled up in a hivemind and then decided I didn't want to leave it, even after it left me. Like a transformation potion - you choose once, and never again. You put yourself on the path, and you never get to come off it again.

That's valid, and a form of otherkin, and not what I'm talking about.

I am absolutely talking about the implication that being a bad person by having it as a kintype makes you someone who should be jailed, regardless of your current actions. I am talking about the implication that by not being sanitized and pretty and perfect and flawless that you're inherently lesser. I am talking about the fact that I don't get to talk about being a Devil, that I don't get to tell y'all about the deeply fucked-up and horrific relationship I had with the Princess that affects me to this day in ways that profoundly change the way I think; that I can't let South or Goni talk about their experiences because the current fictionkin community would run away screaming.

Goni's got an essay in the works hesitantly titled "10 Things to Learn as a Pisces Saint Apprentice" and he wants to make it halfway poetry about the trauma he faced growing up. About being a living bioweapon, torn between flower and fish, about being isolated and forced to kill anyone who comes near you without any choice in the matter on your own.

He doesn't get to talk about the kind of person it made him. Because gods fucking forbid his coping mechanisms and recovery be messy.

South hasn't decided to write any essays so far. He likes to keep people guessing. But his story's not a kind one, and the two best things he can say about his life is that he was free, for a little while, and his sister who he loves more than godhood once pulled him out of the grave to keep fighting. He's known gods better than anyone but me has.

He's one mortal shapechanger with a taste for blood and the seething desire to prove himself. He doesn't get to, because he's too honest. Because he scares people. Because everyone shies away from violence and sex when it's not dressed up in candy-cane frills.

For their sake, if not for mine, I wish I could believe the community wants to hear about that, wants to talk about that. But no. No, we don't get to. Because none of us were heroes. We were, are, villains and antagonists and monsters all.

We don't want to pretend that things were and are less brutal than they are, less serious, less deserving of respect. But in order to exist and talk about ourselves, we have to tame ourselves down and make it sound nicer.

While typing this out, you almost got South offhandedly talking about one of his many, many atrocities. I cut that out, because I doubt folks have the stomach for the vivid picture of gore he paints. That's the problem. That nothing we are is appropriate for the spaces that I grew up in, that was acceptable and encouraged before.

I see spirits who wouldn't know our brands of magic if they were hit in the face with them, and can't describe it other than feeling a little lightheaded. I see people who say they lived through war, but don't seem to understand the feeling of raw loss at being dragged out of the grave after a failed mission to know you were the only survivor. People who say they get feeling ghostly and psychopompous, but don't understand or appreciate decay that isn't pretty and sanitized and are perfectly happy to get into arguments every week over petty nonsense for the adrenaline rush.

I really, really wish I could say that I see these people and can accept that there's more going on that I'm not seeing. But when all I can see for miles is pretty and sanitized talk about being a little lightheaded and that means you're not human, it's not hard to come to the conclusion that either I am seriously out of the loop, or we're not talking about the same thing at all.

I'm still trying to figure out which one it is. I don't want to say "everyone has to talk about their deep pains and feelings", but I don't think "so nobody should and it's somehow traumadumping to be anything other than pretty and perfect material to consume without thinking about" is an acceptable alternative.

I don't know. I wish I did.

#replies

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