#decided to go ahead and link my wanted connections already on the main under the cut

[tiimetvrners]

THEODORE NOTT ( alperen duymaz ) is looking for their FRIEND who resembles ALBERTO ROSENDE, ALEX LANDI, BANITA SANDHU, CHANCE PERDOMO, GABRIEL DARKU, GRETA ONIEOGOU, HALSTON SAGE, JOHN BOYEGA, KANG SEULGI, KEITH POWERS, KELLY GALE, LULU ANTARISKA, MICHAEL EVANS BEHLING, MINA EL HAMMANI, UTP and should be 24-30. applicants do have to contact MAEVE to talk over the details before applying.   ( their friendship is what would be considered more of an unlikely friendship - theodore isn’t particularly friendly, even to those few individuals he does consider to be his friends. he’s cold, he’s distant, he’s afraid of opening up. somehow, this person managed to get him to open up. and theodore isn’t sure how - a fact that probably annoys him. their friendship would’ve started post hogwarts - how they met is up in the air, but i think it’d be fun if it was outside of work. i’ll stop myself before i get too carried away, but i just see a lot of potential here !! )

THEODORE NOTT ( alperen duymaz ) is looking for their OLDER SISTER/SIBLING who resembles NESLIHAN ATAGÜL, AYÇA AYŞIN TURAN, MELISA PAMUK, CAĞLA DEMIR, or ANY FEMALE / FEMALE ALIGNED NON-BINARY FC WHO’S TURKISH AND FITS THE AGE RANGE and should be TWENTY FIVE+. applicants do not have to contact MAEVE to talk over the details before applying.   (   i’ve hesitated to write this up just because i originally picked up theo when his sister was already in play but i was a fan of the concept then and i’m still a fan now! life in the nott household would not have been fun- pyrites nott was not a nice man, a strong supporter of voldemort he would have pushed his ideals onto his children at a young age. he expected only the best from them, punishing them when they didn’t live up to expecations. their mother, may she rest in peace, was kind, too kind according to her husband- he scolded her for coddling them. she was also a sickly woman, struggling with both of her pregnancies until she eventually died during theodore’s third year and life in the nott household was never the same. while it was never particularly loud, it was now silent, where there was once someone to stop pyrites from completely terrorizing his children, he went unchecked. how his sister reacted to this, is completely up to you but theodore became withdrawn and somewhat hostile. he was relieved when his father went to prison, he had never wanted to be a part of the life the older man so desperately wanted for him. and now that he’s out, well theo is scared. as for the relationship between the two siblings, i like to think they got along all things considered they probably only had each other for comfort/support? theo isn’t affectionate but he would love his sister. i think i’ve touched on everything, so you’re more than welcome to shoot me a message otherwise this is your character go wild ! )  

THEODORE NOTT ( alperen duymaz ) is looking for their WORK ACQUINTANCE who resembles UTP and should be ANY. applicants do / do not have to contact MAEVE to talk over the details before applying.   (   i hesitate to call them a friend because theodore isn’t exactly friendly, but they would probably be the closest thing he has to a friend outside of the slytherin gang. theo started working at the ministry right after hogwarts, starting in the department of magical law enforcement before moving to the department of mysteries. they would have met before he switched departments and just hit it off ?? or alternatively they didn’t get along at first but eventually worked it out?? really i’m not picky about this i just think it would be nice for theo to have a friend that’s not from school. bonus points if they weren’t a slytherin student !!  )

THEODORE NOTT ( alperen duymaz ) is looking for their FRIEND WITH BENEFITS who resembles CODY CHRISTIAN, MAXENCE DANET-FAUVEL, JACOB ELORDI, SURAJ SHARMA, MADELEINE MADDEN, ALEXA DEMIE, EMMA MACKAY, AISHA DEE or UTP and should be 22-28 applicants do not have to contact MAEVE to talk over the details before applying.   (   i really don’t have a whole lot of details for this connection- it’s pretty straightforward. though i will say calling them friends might be a stretch, theo is just more likely to refer to it as a friends with benefits situation than a hookup. i do think it would be funny if they couldn’t stand each other, but that’s not a requirement. i do think this arrangement has been going on for a little while now, but it’s not serious so maybe it’s been off and on?? really this could go a number of ways.   )

THEODORE NOTT ( alperen duymaz ) is looking for their FORMER BETROTHED who resembles ADRIANNE HO, VANESSA MORGAN, VIRGINIA GARDNER, REINA HARDESTY, BEANIE FELDSTEIN, GERALDINE VISWANATHAN, BENEDETTA GARGARI, KHADIJHA RED THUNDER, or UTP and should be 22-26. applicants do not have to contact MAEVE to talk over the details before applying.   (   you know how much purebloods love their arranged marriages, well this is really not that different. from an early age an agreement was struck between pyriates nott and the parents of your character that they and theodore would be married. i do like the idea of both of them going along with it to please their parents but secretly hating one another? or maybe the hatred was only on theo’s end and his betrothed was so excited and then subsequently disappointed when they realized theo just didn’t care. really the only thing set in stone is that it’s over! i’m trying to picture it in my head and the only thing i know for sure is theodore would have ended it the second his dad went to prison.  ) 

THEODORE NOTT ( alperen duymaz ) is looking for their EX who resembles PEYTON ALEX SMITH, ALBERTO ROSENDE, GAVIN LEATHERWOOD, JAMES REID, AVAN JOGIA, BAE SUZY, BILLIE LOURD, TATI GABRIELLE, SAMANTHA LOGAN, CHLOE BENNET OR UTP and should be 23-26. applicants do not have to contact MAEVE to talk over the details before applying.   (   i don’t have a lot of details for this connection as theodore isn’t particularly affectionate and i don’t really see him being a great boyfriend but he would’ve tried. this was likely the only time he ould have made an effort when it comes to a relationship and it ended disastrously- so much so that he hasn’t dated since. i do think he would have been to blame for how it ended, but i’m open to discussing this! i just know that he would avoid them like the plague and i think it could be fun. as for when they dated, i think sometime during his final year at hogwarts or right after he graduated would be nice !! another idea is they dated during his first couple of years at the ministry and split around the time he made the move to the department of mysteries and became all secretive. i think this has potential to be fun and i am more than willing to discuss the details!!     )   

[strangerthings4theories]

Mirror Images: Billy And El Are Reflections Of Each Other

As you read this post, hold the following concepts in your mind: yin and yang in Chinese philosophy. The Light Side and Dark Side in Star Wars. The real world and the Upside Down in Stranger Things.

That, my friends, is the level of thematic significance the Duffers are giving Billy and El. And it’s my top reason for believing Billy will come back.

Why?

El is arguably the main character of the show. Any character who’s linked to her so profoundly will be a Big Fuckin’ Deal.

You cannot, CANNOT, create such a consistent dynamic by accident, which tells me that...

...the Duffers have huge intentions for Billy. He will become more significant to the show, not less! If you think he’ll return just for flashbacks or memories, you’re not thinking big enough.

Buuuut I’m getting ahead of myself. First let me show you what I mean when I say Billy and El are mirror images. It’s pretty mind-blowing...

1) The broad strokes of Billy and El’s lives echo each other: their family backgrounds, their traumas, and their journeys in the show.

>>They’ve suffered under abusive fathers. In fact, in S2 they have encounters with their fathers in back-to-back episodes - El with Brenner in episode 7, Billy with Neil in episode 8. 

Both fathers are likened to the Mind Flayer in the power they wield over their children. In episode 7, El’s hallucination of Brenner tells her she has a “wound... growing and festering” (my paraphrase), a clear reference to the tunnels of the Upside Down. Kali, as the creator of the hallucination, is trying to tell El that he is the source of the wound, and El won’t heal until she’s confronted him. 

In episode 8, the title card “The Mind Flayer” opens on Neil driving back to the Hargrove house, implying he’s the real Mind Flayer in Billy’s life. As I’ve argued elsewhere, Billy won’t heal either until he’s confronted Neil.

>>Billy and El lost their mothers because of their fathers. Brenner fried Terry's brain with electricity for daring to defy him. Billy's mother left for an unknown reason, but we’re led to believe she couldn’t take Neil’s abuse anymore. The way she's presented in Billy's memories leads me to believe she has since passed away.

Billy and El are both devastated by their losses. When El tells Billy at Starcourt, “[Your mother] was pretty,” she’s trying to tell him she understands.

>>Billy and El have “adopted” sisters, Max and Kali. Max represents Billy's better nature; Kali represents El's darker nature. In the same season where Billy constantly insists Max isn't his sister - thereby rejecting her - El finds Kali and embraces her. This symbolizes Billy and El’s complementary journeys: Billy is learning to accept his light while El is learning to accept her darkness.

>>Billy and El are wounded and angry because of what’s happened to them. In S1 El worries she's a monster, and in S2 she nearly kills a man in her anger, only to stop herself at the last second (against the wishes of Kali, her darker nature). Billy lets his rage define him. He's turned into a bully over his teen years, and in S2 he nearly kills Steve. Max (his better nature) stops him.

>>Billy and El are viscerally connected to the Upside Down.

The Upside Down is pursuing El. We’re not sure why yet, but their predator/prey dynamic is the main source of conflict in the show. Brenner says to her in S1, “It [the Upside Down] is reaching out to you ‘cause it wants you. It’s calling you. So don’t turn away from it this time.” His words form the backbone of the narrative:

In S1, El opens the first Gate, introducing the Upside Down to our world and setting the events of the show in motion. At the climax, she defeats the Demogorgon, the Mind Flayer's first servant.

S2 deals with the evolving consequences of El opening the first Gate. At the climax, El closes the Gate (symbolically “turning away" from the Upside Down) and catches the Mind Flayer's attention in the process.

In S3, the Mind Flayer comes after El to kill her. She runs from him, and her friends intervene to save her.

In future seasons, the Mind Flayer will regroup and try again but to corrupt her this time, not kill her. The climax of the entire show will hinge on the resolution of their conflict. El will be forced to stop running and face the Mind Flayer head-on.

In S3, Billy is caught by the Mind Flayer and turned into his instrument to hunt El down. This creates a yin/yang situation where Billy and El are revolving around each other, with the Mind Flayer in the center pulling on them both. At Starcourt, El saves Billy's soul by bypassing the Mind Flayer completely - building “the rainbow bridge.”

If you remember that Brenner and Neil, their abusive fathers, are likened to the Mind Flayer, their interaction becomes the story of Billy re-enacting his trauma, and El helping him heal it.

2) Runaway Max gives us a special case of Billy and El mirroring each other.

In S1, one of El's biggest moments happens in episode 6. Mike and Dustin have been cornered by the bullies Troy and James. Right when all hope is lost, El shows up and breaks Troy’s arm. After that, she confesses tearfully, “The gate. I opened it. I'm the monster.” This brings forward her inner struggle - am I a monster for the things I do? - which she will no doubt revisit in future seasons.

Keep in mind that Troy is around 12 years old, and El breaks his right arm.

Jump forward to S2. At one point, Billy complains, “Yeah, we're stuck here [in Hawkins]. And whose fault is that?” - implying it's somehow Max's. She disagrees. “Yours,” she mutters under her breath.

In the show, we never get an explanation. Runaway Max tells us everything.

Back in California, Billy is spiraling deeper and deeper into a pit of rage. One fateful afternoon, he takes it out on Max and her best friend Nate, a 12-year-old boy. When Max resists him, he seizes Nate's right arm and twists it behind his back. He holds it there, watching Max.

“What are you going to do?” he asks, a crazed look in his eyes.

When she does nothing, he breaks Nate's arm.

The fallout is catastrophic. Within weeks, Neil decides they should all move away from California for the good of the family.

Now think about this. El breaks a 12-year-old boy's right arm to save her friends from bullies. Billy breaks a 12-year-old boy's right arm... because he is the bully.

It’s part of the wider pattern: El is light, Billy is darkness.

3) The Duffers use physical markers to underscore Billy and El’s similarities.

>>When the MF wrecks Billy's car, Billy's forehead smashes into the windshield, leaving a gash. At Starcourt, he slams El into the wall, giving her a wound in the same spot. Thematically, their wounds tell the story of Billy suffering abuse, then turning around and inflicting it on El. He’s perpetuating a cycle, and it’s up to him to stop it.

>>Both Billy and El are limping by the time they reach Starcourt. El's leg is injured from the Mind Flayer, while Billy injures his in the car crash. These wounds tell the story of El, the “innocent,” suffering pain through no fault of her own while Billy, the “guilty” one, is being punished for his crimes. (I put those words in quotes because I believe the show will challenge our assumptions.) 

A sad footnote: El has Max and Mike to help her walk. Billy has no one.

>>In S2, Billy gets a nosebleed out of the same nostril as El. This says a LOT, marking him as a future “superhero” and putting him in the same class as El, Kali, and El's mom Terry.

Off the top of my head, only two other characters get nosebleeds, Mayor Kline and Steve. But the blood never comes cleanly out of one nostril the way it does with El. I believe that was a purposeful design choice to avoid muddying the symbolic waters.

...

Y’all, I’ve already hit my picture limit for a single post, and I’m not even done yet :p So I’ll stop there for now. Eventually I’ll show you how El is connected to the Demogorgon in the same strange way as Billy.

You see what I mean though? There is no fuckin’ way Billy is dead for good. Why would the Duffers give him this much resonance with El, then drop him? 

It makes no sense.

If you ask me, they’ve got plans for our boy. World-altering plans. He’s not just coming back; by the end of the show, he’s gonna be a Big Goddamn Hero.

»»————-　✼　————-««

Billy Is Alive - A Meta Series

[emblemxeno]

JP vs. Localization in Fire Emblem Fates: Revelation

(Okay, for real this time lol)

Again, here’s a link to my sources post.

Fortunately, this route follows suit in terms of good localization quality after Conquest. It’s the shortest out of all the posts, since I don’t really have a lot to talk about. Mostly subtle line changes, references and a few key points of information that were cut out. I also went through Hidden Truths and Heirs of Fate to see if I could add stuff from those on here, but there were no big problems that I found.

Once again, the main part of this post will all be put under the cut. If a chapter isn’t covered, it means I didn’t think there were any differences worth talking about.

I’ll use localized names for characters and locations, unless I feel the need to do otherwise.

I’ll be using she/her when referring to Corrin in this post. (I flipped a coin to decide the gender lol)

Also, note that after Chapter 14, the translation of this route on Fateswartable ends, so I mostly relied on the English patch done by Serenes at that point forward. (I also used PegasusKnight.com as a reference to fall back on if I needed it)

Chapter 7

-A minor gripe I have with localization. The JP version compares Touma (Valla) to hell constantly. To jump ahead a bit, I believe in the JP versions of the End of All Sky/Land/Below tracks are even called The End of All Roads Heaven/Earth/Hell. The Vallites are also often called demons in the JP version, and Anankos himself is known as the ‘Invisible Demon Dragon’.

Another cool thing I just thought of too, is a connection to a popular Japanese short story. Zelda fans might be familiar with the story, “The Spider’s Thread”, which inspired the Ancient Cistern dungeon in Skyward Sword.

The beginning of the story has Buddha walking through paradise (heaven), before coming across a pond. The pond is filled with crystal clear water, and covered with water lilies/lotuses. As Buddha gazes further into the pond, he begins to see the depths of hell.

Sound familiar? “Azura is walking through Hoshido, before coming across a lake. The lake is filled with crystal clear water, and when she gazes into the lake she sees the fallen kingdom of her birth. Valla, the kingdom associated with water lilies/lotuses in the game, has been turned into hell itself.”

This association loses its meaning a bit when the comparisons to hell are a bit toned down, as well as when the Buddhist inspirations were kind of supplanted in favor of Greek renames. It’s not supremely important to the plot as a whole, but it’s something interesting I wanted to bring up.

-In the JP version, while explaining what happened in Valla, Azura eventually says “Using the art of manipulating people’s souls, he (Hydra/Anankos) made the people kill each other.” This bit of the people killing each other was cut in localization.

Chapter 12

-In the JP version, when Corrin asks Flora if she knows anything about dragons, Flora says “Sorry, I don’t know…The ancestral dragon of the Ice Clan has already perished and isn’t part of the legend. I don’t know what role it plays, sorry…” Localization makes her response “I'm sorry, but I can't think of anything... They've been gone so long that we don't even have tales of dragons in the Ice Tribe. I'm sorry I couldn't be of more assistance...”

So, the JP version explicitly says the Ice Dragon is dead (I believe Fates’ second artbook mentioned this as well), whereas the localization only says the First Dragons have been gone for a long time.

Chapter 16

-There’s not really much of a problem that I have with what Ryoma says about Corrin “having leadership qualities at a young age” but I wanted to do comparisons regardless cuz the word choice might lead one to different conclusions. In localization, Ryoma says this:

Ryoma: Huh... So she told us the same thing... I don't think it's in Corrin's nature to lie. And there's a leadership quality about her that just attracts followers. I remember being jealous of her as a child, in fact. Even at such a young age, she displayed the characteristics of a ruler. Silly to be jealous of her, right?

In the JP version, Ryoma says this:

Ryoma: Oh... So, she told you the same thing. …Corrin isn’t one to tell lies. She’s been like that since childhood. She’s always genuine and honest... She has this mysterious appeal that draws people to her. Seeing my younger sister with the qualities of being a ruler... Honestly, it makes me feel envious. …What a ridiculous thing to say, right?

Again, I don’t necessarily have a problem with how it was localized, but some might. The localization version might have people think that Corrin somehow was a fantastic leader at such a young age, but JP is more clear that it was about the qualities she had at a young age that would be valuable as a leader.

Chapter 19

-A minor gripe. In the localization, Azura says that Anankos uses his magic to send Vallites to Nohr and Hoshido to stir up conflict. In the JP version, she says he uses magic, along with the help of a body of water. That’s why whenever you fight Vallites outside of Valla proper, there’s a body of water nearby; Hoshido’s lake (and the ponds shown in Hinoka’s CQ battle which are in the capital) for Chapter 5, the sea for BR chapter 11, the burning falls for BR chapter 21, and the city for Rev chapter 13. Similarly, the consequences of being a victim to the curse are described as “turning into sea foam” in the JP version. Localization as a whole kind of toned down how much water has an influence on the story.

Chapter 23

-Probably the pettiest gripe I have lol. As Arete is fading away from Azura’s arms, Azura has a different reaction in localization and Japanese. In localization, Azura says “Mother? Mother!” while a voice clip of her in-battle pain cries plays. In the JP, she says  “*Sob... Sob*…! Mother... Mother...!”, while a voice clip of her crying plays. Her crying voice clip I don’t recall hearing anywhere else.

This is one of the few times in the you get to see Azura express a heavy and heartfelt emotion, since her rough childhood caused her to remain guarded and stoic around everyone. The equivalents to this scene in other routes is her death scene in Birthright, and her crying with Corrin over Ryoma’s death in Conquest; a normally unflinching and aloof character breaking down is a rarity, and indicates that the cause of it is something to take note of for the character as a whole. Localization softened this aspect, and I take issue with it, despite it probably seeming trivial to most other people.

Chapter 24

-When Corrin is questioning the phantom Mikoto, an exchange happens. In localization, part of it goes like this:

Corrin: But this can't be... Are you truly my mother?

Mikoto: I am. Even as a puppet of Anankos, my spirit at least remains my own.

Corrin: I... I believe you.

In the JP version, it goes like this:

Corrin: It can’t be... …Are you really my mother?

Mikoto: Yes... I became an Invisible servant, controlled by the Invisible King... Even so, I am your mother.

Corrin:  …………

Again, a minor thing that I don’t personally have issue with, but replacing Corrin’s silence with an admittance of belief could make some believe she has “reverted” back to being too naïve.

Chapter 26

-While Gunter is relaying his past, an exchange happens. In localization, it goes like this:

Gunter: I ask myself that, every day. I cannot understand the minds of royals. To you all, we commoners are little more than pawns in your schemes... Or weeds to be killed on a whim.

Corrin: That's not true...

Xander: Is that how people view the royalty?

Ryoma: Such an impression would easily breed powerful resentment...

In the JP version, Corrin, Xander and Ryoma don’t say anything. They just remain silent.

Endgame

-Not a major problem so much as a general thing about the game, but I can think of like... at least three memes that Treehouse inserted into the localization. Now I like memes, but there is no better way to date your media nowadays. One of them was Kana’s “That’s dragon for I love you” which tbh, is kind of cute and isn’t the most well known meme so I guess I can let it slide. Another is Felicia saying “I had one job!” when she messes up in the dining hall, which isn’t that big of a deal since the dining hall is very optional.

The last one I can think of is why I put this specific grievance here, and it’s during Corrin’s speech before facing Anankos.

Corrin: We won't back down! This is my... This is our destiny! Ready your weapons! Fight for your friends! With the Seal of Flames... With the Fire Emblem on our side! We fight for our world!!

Yeah, she says “Fight for your friends” which is everyone’s favorite Ike line from Brawl. Now, this isn’t even a totally inaccurate translation either, but it kind of just... makes the moment funny for the player when it’s supposed to be commanding and serious I guess.

But yeah, not the most important issue by far, but something I’d thought to mention. Hell, it’s not even that bad compared to how they made Peri’s, Effie’s and Hisame’s quirks into exaggerated and tired jokes. And the Beruka-Saizo support. Never forget.

-When Azura and Corrin are by the lake and discuss the latter’s plans to rule, Corrin says this in localization:

Corrin: I'm going to make Valla a wonderful place! In honor of the true last king and for Queen Arete. And everyone who fought... I promise to make them all proud.

In the JP version, she says this:

Corrin: I’ll make the Invisible Kingdom (Valla) into a great land. For the previous monarch, Queen Shenmei (Arete)… And for all of my allies who fought beside me. I promise.

So, JP version only mentions Arete as the reigning monarch of Valla. Which makes sense, cuz unless there was some wild “keeping the bloodline pure” shenanigans in Valla, Arete being the Queen keeps in line with what we know about the rest of Valla’s history. Arete was royalty from birth, as was her sister Mikoto. Arete is the one who passed down Lost in Thoughts and the pendant to Azura.  

[jazy3]

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 18X01

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

I was really excited for the Premiere and I have never been so disappointed in my life. It took me a few days to write this review because I’m just so unimpressed. I feel like the only interesting parts of the Season 18 Premiere were the Meredith and Hayes FaceTime call, Levi in that outfit and Jo with that hair, and the interviews. That's it. I mean Teddy and Owen’s two weddings were interesting if you’re a Teddy and Owen shipper, but I never have been so that didn’t really do anything for me.

The pacing of the episode was super slow and it was just altogether boring. There were also just so many inconsistencies. For example, Teddy and Owen originally planned to get married at the park with just Megan, Farouk, Evelyn, Leo, and Allison which doesn’t make sense because prior to their break up they were talking about planning their dream wedding. Now they finally get married and Richard didn’t even know about it? They asked Megan to fly in, but they didn’t tell their friends at the hospital after they just all attended Maggie and Winston’s wedding two weeks earlier?

It’s also not clear if Meredith knows that they got married which is weird because she’s the main character of the show and was an integral part of Owen’s previous two weddings one of which was held at her house. Also, Amelia and Link weren’t there and it’s not clear if they even knew about the wedding which is weird because Meredith, Amelia, and Link were all present when Owen proposed to Teddy at Christmas at Meredith’s house and they are all co-parenting Leo together.

While I appreciated the shift to a lighter tone and that they chose to have this season exist in a post-COVID alternative universe where we can see the actors faces again without the PPE and return to escapism the Premiere didn't pack the punch I was expecting. The premieres are usually super shocking and action packed and this one just wasn't. It was just boring and all of the most interesting stuff happened off camera during the two weeks between the Season 17 Finale and the Season 18 Premiere which is just stupid.

I saw the priest getting hit by one of the cyclists coming a few minutes before it happened based on the promo and the context of the scene and there wasn't a big shocking event like there usually is. The pace of the Premiere really felt off to me. My friend Amy who I watch with every week described it as the pacing you usually associate with a nice stroll through a moonlit garden. Fine for episode two or three or a connecting episode but not the Premiere. I feel like they really misjudged what fans were looking for and I’m hoping that they do the work and course correct now that the Premiere has aired and the completely dismal fan reaction as come out.

One of the few bright spots for me was the introduction of Peter Gallagher as Dr. David Hamilton. I love him as an actor! He's great! His recent roles in Grace and Frankie and Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist were fantastic! I was super excited when I heard he was coming to Grey's. I like Dr. Hamilton so far and I'm interested to see how his relationship with Ellis and Meredith having dreams about her mother following her battle with COVID will play into the story this season. While it would be interesting to see Meredith work in Minnesota temporarily like Cristina did back in Season 9, I don't want her there permanently. Seattle is as much a character in the show as any of the main characters we've come to love, and something would be missing for me if she moved.

To be perfectly honest, it doesn't make much sense to me for Meredith to move to Minnesota permanently when she only knows a few people there. Who would watch her kids? If she's going to move to me, it makes more sense for her to move to Kansas where Alex is or Switzerland where Cristina is. Her kids have already lost their father and so many other caregivers and Meredith has stuck it out in Seattle for so long after everything that's happened that her moving to Minnesota for me would be bonkers.

Also, where were her kids in the Premiere? All of the interviews that came out prior to the Premiere talked about how Meredith’s focus at the beginning of the season would be on her work and her kids, but they were nowhere to be found in the Premiere and it’s not clear whose watching them while Meredith is in Minnesota. The interviews also made it seem like Meredith and Hayes would still be circling each other at the start of the season with quotes about how timing hadn’t been on their side, that they still needed to have an official drink and go out on a date, and that while Meredith wasn’t looking for a relationship one might find her.

That had literally nothing to do with the Premiere we saw whatsoever! The kids were MIA and it turned out that Meredith and Hayes started dating off screen following Maggie and Winston’s wedding and we didn’t get to see ANY of the firsts they talked about so much over the last two seasons. So stupid. The Premiere was a total rip off. I hate that Nick Marsh is back and I’ve never gone from liking a character and an actor to hating them in such a short period of time ever. My God. I’m so pissed off about this. What the hell were they thinking? Why did they think we would want this at all?

Don’t get me wrong, I loved Nick Marsh as a character and Scott Speedman's portrayal of him when he first showed up in Season 14. I was all ready for him to be Meredith's next great love and I was on board. But then he disappeared and was never heard from again and it was reported that Speedman wanted to take a break from TV for a while so I mourned the loss of what could have been and moved on. I sat through the out of character nonsense that was the DeLuca storyline in the belief that eventually that storyline would end, and Meredith would get a real proper love interest that made sense and would be her post-Derek endgame.

So, I was really excited when they introduced Hayes and I have really come to love his character and his budding relationship with Meredith. I feel like I've been waiting forever to finally see them go on a date and I am super pissed off that we didn't get to see it. I would have loved this storyline with Nick if they had introduced it at any previous point in time, but now after they've spent so much time setting up Meredith and Hayes it's just infuriating. I feel immense rage over how they handled Meredith and Hayes and Meredith and Nick’s storylines in the Premiere. I'm so angry. The whole thing just made no sense. That Premiere should never have aired. It never should have gotten past the draft stage. It was that bad. The first date and all of the firsts that come with a new relationship are the most exciting parts of a romantic storyline for me and I love seeing all of that on screen. They hyped Meredith and Hayes’ relationship up so much and even had the two of them talk about 'firsts' and dating after death so for their first date to happen off screen along with Austin's panic attacks and bad reaction to his Dad starting to date again is just such a rip off.

I have stuck with this show through thick and thin and for them to reward that loyalty by having the most interesting parts of that storyline happen off screen while showing a bunch of stuff on screen with other characters that they could have just told us about? So ridiculous. I was so excited for this season and now I'm just angry. I'm hoping that they are building to a big mid-season finale where Meredith is going to return to Seattle and by that time Bailey will have helped Hayes out with Austin and the two of them will finally get together on screen but I'm starting to feel like every time I get invested in one of the Meredith's new love interests, they pull the rug out from under me and I'm getting really fed up.

In other news, I'm not too surprised that Megan and Riggs broke up off screen only because Virgin River, which I love, just got picked up for two more seasons and I imagine Martin Henderson is busy filming that and it looks like Megan is going to be around for a while and they had to explain it somehow. I loved Meredith and Riggs together and I hated how they ended that storyline so I'm not sad about them breaking up off screen.

The Premiere also broke my heart over Amelia and Link’s storyline. It’s just so stupid. It’s drama for drama’s sake that’s all it is and it’s tired. When did marriage become so important to Link? In the span of a few months, he went from being totally fine with not getting married and checking in with Amelia every few weeks on how she felt to convincing himself that Amelia wanted him to propose so he did so at her sister's wedding and used her dead brother's children to do it. Amelia's right the whole thing was super messed up and manipulative and she was right to say no.

Link decided marriage was important to him and that fostering Luna would be totally fine without ever talking to Amelia. Yes, Amelia should have shared her thoughts with him too, but he also should have paid attention. Now their otherwise healthy relationship is over because she doesn't want to participate in an archaic ritual that involves signing a contract and exchanging vows? That's just stupid. I hope they find a way to work it out and get back together because I really like them as a couple.

I like Dr. Michelle Lin the new Head of Plastic of Surgery that Bailey and Richard are looking to hire. I thought for sure after that photo of the other guy made the rounds on social media that he was going to be the new Head of Plastics, but then he said that he doesn't do "free" and I knew he was out. I'm excited for there to be another female surgeon of colour on the show as the gender and racial balance on the show has been more white and male as of late and I think Grey's is at its best when you have a roughly equal number of women and men and as many different races being represented as possible.

I think it makes the storylines more interesting and authentic and personally gives me more characters that I can identify with. This new doctor seems driven, determined, and could have a potentially interesting dynamic with Richard and Bailey. She’s also giving me some Cristina Yang vibes and I’m all for that. I love Cristina. Always have. Always will. That being said, I'm a bit confused as to where they are going with Jo's storyline as I thought for sure the new Head of Plastics would be a guy and her new love interest. But Bailey did say they still needed to hire a new general surgeon and a new neurosurgeon so maybe one of them will be for her?

I can't really say that there was anything I loved about the Premiere which is disappointing. Jo's parenting hair dye mishap was funny, Levi's outfit cracked me up, and I liked that Bailey agreed to help Hayes out, but that's about it. The thing I was most excited for coming into this season was Meredith finally being back on her feet and seeing the romantic storyline between her and Hayes finally come to fruition.

Finding out that she's going to be in Minnesota for the foreseeable future, she and Hayes started dating off screen but had to call it quits because seeing his Dad date someone new caused Austin to have panic attacks, and finding out that Nick Marsh is back? I hated it. I don't understand how the same person who wrote the Season 16 masterpiece “Snowblind” with that amazing snow scene between Meredith and Hayes wrote the Premiere. I just don't understand. I really hope they're not going to do a love triangle with Meredith, Hayes, and Nick because that would just be so stupid.

She's a forty something award-winning surgeon who's a widowed single mother of three. Love triangles made sense when she was young intern, but at this point it's just dumb. I also didn't feel the chemistry this time around between Meredith and Nick like I did the first time. It felt forced and flat. I like Maggie and Winston together, but I didn't find their storyline in the Premiere particularly engaging. I'm glad that Amelia stayed true to herself, but I hate that Link has decided marriage is the only way forward and that they're still fighting.

The only moment that really made me laugh out of the hour was when Jo opened the door and Levi was in that ridiculous outfit. I loved the FaceTime call between Meredith and Hayes, but I hated the context. Honestly, I'm not really excited about any upcoming storyline this season which makes me really sad. I'm usually super positive and hopeful when it comes to this show, but this episode just stomped all over my dreams. All I can hope for now is that they pull a twist and everything I was hoping for happens in the mid-season finale otherwise I don't think I'm going to like this season very much.

Until next time!

[anothertimdrakestan]

Light Of My Life Pt.2 Jason Todd x Reader

Words: 2.5k

Requested? Yes! From a lovely returning anon!

“I’m the anon who requested the avenger reader and ......... *chefs kiss* *chefs kiss* *chefs kiss* It’s so good! i love the readers powers and how they get sparky when they’re happy! I always thought that captain America and tony stark and Natasha and everyone else would be protective of the reader so I wonder what would happen if she introduced Jason to the avengers? Do you think they’d find out that he was red hood? (And they’d keep it a secret but maybe then they’d be REALLY protective)”

LINK TO PROMPTS  -> REQUESTS ARE STILL OPEN!

HI AGAIN IM SO GLAD YOU’RE BACK LOVE!!! We been knew I love me a good protective family and Jason sooooo my beautiful anon you did it again! Chef’s kisses right back at you angel <333 Because you liked the happy sparks let me show you what happens when all the emotions come out to play.... mwahahahaha CHECK OUT PT 1 HERE!

“Fuck no.” 

You rolled your eyes at your boyfriend as he pouted. “Hey I met your family you have to meet mine!” you chided, Jason had been reluctant to meet the other Avengers. The last time he’d ever met one besides you was as Robin pre-death when Stark came to visit Bruce Wayne and Iron Man visited Batman. The two never really got along and since Jason idolized Bruce he hadn’t been the kindest to Stark. 

You’d only recently learned this when you told the other Avengers why you always wanted to be in Gotham. Cap was happy you’d found a friend, he understood the necessity of having a person you can talk to and rely on, and he missed his person so he wished you the best. To say Stark was pissed was an understatement. Not only was he secretly rooting for you and Spidey to get together but he always got a bad taste in his mouth thinking about the Wayne family. “No” was his only reply and you had to give him the “even though you’re my father figure and my boss you don’t control my personal life” speech which ended in a hug and some cursing under his breath. To your surprise Peter was equally upset and said next time you went to Gotham he needed to meet this elusive, powerless, gun wielding, Jason.

And just like that here you were in Gotham, wrapping in your boyfriend’s arms, trying to convince him to come meet the “A-list” as he called them. “You’re going Jay. Maybe you can bring Tim he loves the Avengers he’d die to meet them!” you cooed, knowing Jason would agree because he never wanted to tell you no. Jason knew how excited you were, he could feel the light shocks that danced on your skin as he held you. Begrudgingly he agreed. You had decided it would be better to meet as your human personas rather than stir up the media with an Avengers visit to Gotham. 

“Hey gorgeous” Jason grinned as you gave him a spin in one of your favorite outfits, beyond excited to introduce him to the people who were your family you rushed over to him. As you toyed with his t-shirt collar you admired his appearance, Jason was fashionable in the lowkey, vibey kind of fashion, it was perfect, and undeniably attractive. You could tell he was trying to hide his nerves, he gripped your hand tighter than normal and fidgeted slightly, he knew these people were your home and you could tell he wanted to make a good impression even if he wouldn’t admit it.

You’d invited them to your now shared apartment with Jason. The two of you had spent a while cleaning and prepping for guests and the apartment was spotless. Getting the text from Stark that him, Peter, and Natasha were headed up and you saw the three of them cloaked in jackets and hats entering the main lobby. Giving Jason’s hand a squeeze you gave him a quick peck on the cheek and a reassuring looking. Jason leaning into your embrace whispered “it’ll go fine” and you couldn’t tell if he was saying it to himself or you. Almost on cue there was a loud knock and before you could get to the door Tony burst in with Natasha and Peter following. “WHERE IS HE!” Tony yelled and you rushed over grinning. “Shut up Stark behave yourself!” he brought you into a quick hug before looking at Jason. “Hello Todd” he said, Jason looked a little shocked that Tony had either remembered from those years ago or had done his research. Jason stuck out a hand feigning confidence and Tony took it strongly. 

Inviting everyone in you all sat cooly around the living room. As you talked with Natasha about recent events and living in Gotham you noticed that Jason looked afraid to touch you, sitting rigid next to you. Glancing over you saw him getting death stares from Peter and Tony anytime he moved a muscle. “The two of you stop it!” you chided, grabbing Jason’s hand and realizing it was slightly shaking. “I expect it from Mr. Father Figure but really Parker?” you quipped as he shrugged in agreement. 

You could feel your aura radiate with annoyance and Peter and Tony looked taken aback. “Hey Sparky- Y/N it’s fine” Jason looked embarrassed at his use of one of his many nicknames. “Dude you use electric puns too!” Peter looked excited as he told Jason about some of his favorites. As the two bonded you groaned when Peter said “DUDE LIGHTNING MCQUEEN IS SUCH A GOOD ONE!” and went in for a high five over your embarrassment. Tony broke the bro-moment, “So Jason Todd, second Robin, heard you died. Haven’t seen you in a bit do you prefer Todd or Hood?” Jason gulped, straightening up as he squeezed your hand. “Um, Todd is fine, yeah I did and it was really hard but I have Y/N and she’s really been amazing and also yes I was Robin when I saw you a long time ago and you totally already know that but yeah” he took in a deep breath as Tony processed his answers. Turning to you he asked “and he’s nice to you? Good friend? Good lover? No ring yet right? I learned the hard way waiting too long isn’t great but you better not rush this kid” you rolled your eyes hearing the same line of questioning as always. “Tony shut the hell up” Natasha interrupted. “Look, Jason’s whole body is angled to Y/N, he’s holding her hand through the sparks and probably shocks, he hasn’t gotten angry at your dumb overprotective dad moments, and everytime one of them looks at the other they calm down a little more. They’re in love Tony leave them be.” Tony starred in silence before standing up, drawing in a breath you could feel Jason tense. “Alright then I approve. Let’s get this party started! You guys got booze?” 

A couple drinks in an everyone was best friends with everyone. You and Peter weren’t of age yet so you both skipped but Tony was definitely nicer a couple drinks in, and Jason was a lot less tense even though he wasn’t drinking, determined to stay sober to answer any questions he was asked. Peter still looked like he didn’t trust Jason but you couldn’t help but grin as you watched the only father figure you’d ever had bond with your boyfriend. You finally felt like you had a family, it was perfect. 

Perfect until Peter Parker got attacked. 

As you frantically zapped through light posts you heard Jason on his bike behind you. Tony and Natasha didn’t want to alert the press with two of the most prominent Avengers being seen in Gotham and after a couple drinks they decided to let you and Jason take the lead. So as Red Hood and Y/H/N took to the Gotham streets after Clayface who had engulfed a terrified Peter Parker, Black Widow and Iron Man watched from above. 

You zapped in front of Clayface, your skin practically sizzling. “you!” ZAP “are!” ZAP “interrupting!” ZAP “my!” ZAP “DAY!!!” you screeched, letting out all the anger and stress pent up from the day. Unfortunately, your electricity didn’t have much effect on a giant piece of dirt, so you went for keeping it’s attention while Jason fiddled with some explosives. 

You zapped around the scene, being careful not to let Clayface get a hand on you for fear of him trying to engulf you too. You could barely hear Jason, cursing yourself for leaving you comm somewhere in the apartment but you could make out “Y/H/N it’s ready but Peter’s in there!” from Jason. “Shit alright I’m going in I guess!” you called, unsure if your powers would even work inside of Clayface. With a deep breath you ran straight ahead, preparing for whatever came next when a figure shoved you out of the way. Instinctively you shot into a lamp post for safety when you saw Red Hood press the button for the explosives and dive into Clayface. Once you realized he just sacrificed his life for yours appeared on the pavement screaming for Jason. Lightning cracked above you as you cried out amid the explosion. At the peak of the explosion everything you felt was too much, needing to know if Jason was okay and it Peter was still alive you felt stuck to the ground. Letting out a guttural scream you gave up trying to hold everything in. The lightning dissipated as you felt your energy connect to every current in Gotham. As the smoke cleared you saw a pile of Clay and no Red Hood and your heart snapped in half. Sinking to your knees you felt the power of every light in Gotham and it was too much. As your tears poured you needed the pain to stop, it had to stop, you’d lost everything. 

And then it did. No more sparks, no more current, no more emotion, no more pain. 

Your eyes fell out of focus as you stared ahead. You didn’t see two figures emerged from behind the corner of a building. Your eyes were blurry and you felt numb, unable to recognize the voice of Jason as he called out for you. Everything was quiet and muted, no buzzing from the streetlights or vibrations from cell towers, you felt disconnected, lost. Slowly blinking, thoughts of your past boyfriend jolted through you so quickly you couldn’t comprehend the fact that he was right in front of you. His voice sounded like a faint whisper calling for you. A different reality almost. You felt yourself get lifted into the air, off the ground and into someone’s embrace. 

This embrace carried you home. Home. That was your apartment. With Jason. But he was gone and someone had brought you home, setting you softly on the couch.

“What the fuck happened to Y/N” Jason pleaded Tony who looked just as confused. “I think she’s in shock, maybe she didn’t have her comm in and didn’t hear the plan for rescuing Peter then dealing with Clayface?” Tony whispered as he looked at you as you stared at a wall, tears slowly cascading down your cheeks. Natasha squatted next to you, waving a hand in front of your face. “She’s in shock but we need to shock her out of it, anyone got a spark?” Tony quickly reprogrammed part of his suit to deliver a fair amount of voltage into your body. Taking a deep breath Jason just wanted to hold your hand but he knew that was not going to be safe until you woke up. As everyone stood back Tony counted down “One, Two - ”

Suddenly you felt the connection again, it jolted through you and danced on your skin, you felt the humming of the fan in your apartment. Your apartment, you were home. Home. Home is with Jason, and you could feel him next to you. Jason, was, home. Safe.

“JASON YOU IDIOT WHAT WERE YOU THINKING YOU FUCKING DIED AGAIN!” you bolted up and began wailing on his chest, shocking everyone around you at your burst of, well, energy. Without thinking Jason just pulled you into his chest, swaying slightly back and forth you melted into his grip. “Y/N baby Stark thought your comm was on like mine and we thought you knew the plan, you were making a good diversion and everything” Jason explained. “Then Parker and I come out after the big boom and you’re like completely zoned out. Like even the sky was clear, and your eyes didn’t have the little sparkle they always have, we thought you’d lost it or something” he rambled as you finally put the pieces together. Glancing up at him you whispered “so you’re okay?” and he nodded, giving you a reassuring smile. “You can’t get rid of me that easily Sparky” you found comfort in the nickname that was slowly growing on you. 

After a cup of tea and some relaxation you were feeling a lot better. Peter was impressed at how quickly Jason thought on his feet and that he’d put himself in danger to save him and was a lot happier with your relationship. You’d told him about Tim and how well the two nerds would get along so he tagged along with Stark who was out meeting Bruce and trying to explain why there had been an explosion and Avenger sighting in his city, and Natasha used her expertise to know it was time for you and Jason to have some alone time, so she headed out as well. 

Now you were resting in Jason’s arms as he toyed with your hair. Breaking the silence you admitted “I think I severed my powers when I thought you died” and Jason looked up, his face asking you for more. Delving into some of your own truths you admitted “I always knew my powers were emotion driven. Like our kiss that one night. And I knew there was a reason that I have to keep some energy inside and reign it in, but now I know that releasing it all doesn’t explode, it makes me implode on myself. Like the energy I use is raw emotion and when I thought you were gone it hurt too much and I cut it off” you sighed, enjoying the feeling of letting it off your chest. You could’ve sworn Jason slyly wiped a tear away before pulling you in close as he too sighed. “I think you’re right Y/N but that means your powers are more interesting than we ever knew. And I know what it feels like to lose everything, and I’ll spend the rest of my life apologizing for ever being the reason you felt the loss. It kills me to think of you in such pain you couldn’t feel it anymore. Because you are the strongest person I know and I know how painful it must’ve been. I’m so sorry. And I love you” 

The big eight letters. They felt right. Raising your head to his you took his lips in yours, trying to convey the same words right back at him. In the moment of pure love you felt warmth envelop your entire body, unable to contain the joy. Mid-kiss you let a grin slip onto your face and you pulled away. “Jason Todd I love YOU!” you moved to throw your arms around him and as you outstretched your fingers you released some of your love into the air and suddenly everything in the room when black. 

“Y/N you just shorted out the apartment building. But I love you too” You were kind of glad the lights were now off because Jason couldn’t see the furious blush that developed on your cheeks. Flopping down on to him you mused “Too many emotions for one day, I feel pretty shorted out too” and Jason hummed in agreement. As the two of your drifted off into sleep you heard him mumble:

“You better get control of these emotions I can’t be telling you I love you then having you break my toaster. I need my waffles you know” and you groaned. 

“I’ll put that on the list of things to worry about. Right beneath the end of the world so pretty high up there” 

“Thanks I appreciate it. Good night my lovely bolt of lightning”

“Goodnight you sappy fuck”

[thethreemages]

*rises from the grave to finally deliver on a certain new story arc chapter*

...Heeeey everybody lol I know this may not be something anyone expected in like, ages compared to my other recent TTM-content... but well, ever since my last chapter upload from maaany months ago... I've just continuously kept getting blocked from wanting to get back more into the main story, especially with the influx of developing lore and side casts I've been having fun with a bit more in comparison.

But well, after some more heavy thinking and reworking a bit of how I wanted to frame the next few bits of the story to go (while still keeping relatively faithful to my original concepts)... here's the official next part to keep the main story flowing with some rather "juicy" drama ahead~

((Here's the DA Link for the fic itself in case it gets too cut-off here-))

===========

The eerie stillness of the forest was something all too familiar to those raised around this trek of the woods… but this night in particular was getting all the more “curious” for what semblance of peace was broken left and right....

On one side, a noble prince and a gentle strength mage were connecting all the closer together as they were quietly walking through the woods.

On another, a fiery prince and a gruff healer mage were stumbling into the middle of an ominous find… enough to have stirred up some lingering “threats” following after them.

And finally, as of now… a cunning dark mage was finding herself apprehended by a group she once looked up to, respected, and trusted…

“-I will not say this again! Unhand Me. This. Instant!” Prym Fletcher hissed towards the pair of guards who were roughly escorting her back to the camp, feeling tempted to have blasted them back already with her magic… had it not been for a fierce pair of eyes ordering her to keep still.

“Save it, kid. You’ve snooped upon very classified information against official orders, you’re not leaving our sight.” Taiyin Zhou replied back with a firm tone, “You’re about lucky we haven’t already arrested you as is…”

“Ughhh, I’m telling you I did NOT snoop! I had simply stumbled across your camp by accident!” the young dark mage insisted, her voice already growing exasperated with frustration, “Why won’t you believe me?? I’m Lady Meradyth and Sir Luka’s daughter, for Saint’s sake-!”

Halting in her tracks upon hearing that, Taiyin only turned her head to give a… rather puzzled look, “Sir… Luka? Um, sorry but... no one’s ever been registered in our ranks with that name…”

Rightfully confused as ever by that response, Prym had taken the moment to shove off the guards restraining her as she offendedly exclaimed, “Wait… w-what?? Oh, now this has to be a damn joke… Luka was once one of your top members back in the day! Closest friend to Ivor and my mother Meradyth, what do you mean by ‘never been registered’??”

“-Look, I’ve been here in the Elite for a good number of years, kid... and I think I would know if I was aware of anyone named Luka,” Taiyin furrowed her gaze to Prym in a frustratedly tired way, almost reminding her of one of the strict & overworked teachers back at St. Ravilda’s, “I don’t know what else to tell ya on that front, but we’ll be the ones handling the questions here, thank you very much...”

The younger mage could feel her fists clenching in a rising anger towards this woman’s insensitivity… yet didn’t have time to make another retort as a pair of familiar faces joined to greet them from behind Taiyin.

There stood the imposing General himself, alongside the stoic Alastair who gave a quiet look of disapproval towards his comrade’s harshness to Prym. In the meantime, Ivor’s face seemed to twist with many mixed feelings upon seeing his daughter’s friend. Shock, disappointment, confusion… and perhaps even a bit of fear?

“Prym… what in the Saints’ good names are you doing out here??” Ivor shakily demanded to know, the stern fatherly side of his kicking into high gear as if she were his own child caught in the act, “I told you specifically to stay back at home where it’s safe! Don’t you know what kind of danger you’re putting yourself in, especially at this hour of night within these woods??”

“I… w-well,” Prym struggled at first to find the words, not wanting to risk giving away that Tula and the others were very much out there in the woods too… so, after taking a second to think and compose herself, she retorted back to him with an unamused tone of her own, “Hmpf… I suppose I should be more asking you the same question, Ivor. Don’t think I didn’t hear His Majesty giving you orders to collect this insidious-sounding ‘white plague’ for him… whatever the hell that means for his standards…”

“-Hey, what did I say about watching your tone, kid-!” Taiyin attempted to scold her… only for Alastair to hold up his hand to let the young girl speak her mind. Not exactly expecting Prym to have spun the question onto him now, Ivor gave a conflicted moment of silence… but eventually, an approving look from Alastair encouraged the hulking General the resolve to just admit what’s up, not seeing much else to lose now that she’s already here...

“The… white plague we were speaking of earlier, Prym… is a code name for this strand of white fungal root that had suddenly taken bloom within Graystone. These plants… they’re about the most devastating plant species our country’s faced in these past few decades… once was the stuff of legends within our oldest history books, but then… somehow some twisted, sick individuals decided to recreate these plants and spread them loose to cause countless amounts of destruction among the lands…”

Hearing of these plants made Prym’s eyes widen a bit in recognition… taking a moment to think on it, “Hold on, I… think I might’ve heard of such plants back in this one story Professor Blanchard once told us; an old crone who was jealous of the younger beauties in her town made up a mash of brew from these weird, white twigs so she could poison the girls, and absorb their own beauty to become a ‘goddess’. The plan backfired when it simply made the other men exposed to her inner flaws despite all her good looks, so she was cast off in a ritual fire to pay for her sins. Could… those perhaps be the white plague plants you were mentioning?”

One by one, Ivor and the others had given a nod of yes as Alastair floated up a steel box to open in display… revealing within a sealed-jar the shriveled up remains of a ghastly, half-rotted root… curled into a position like that of a crooked hand. Nauseating as the contents were to look at, the fact that this root was seemingly swimming in a sickeningly thick black liquid near the bottom didn’t help either…

“Indeed, Prym… this is the white plague we’ve been tasked by King Grayle to retrieve,” Ivor continued on to explain, “In our years of tracking them down, they’ve been linked to many terrible cases of people becoming infected when they didn’t expect it. Whether it’d be from injesting the root itself or the snow-like spores spread out into the air… its almost impossible to fully recover from it before its too late...”

“Yes… these roots were the ultimate cause of many terrible tragedies our country will never forget…” Alastair finally spoke up as cleared his throat, his tone serious yet solemn as ever, “Queen Elianne’s death, the double-crossed Wraith Night survivors, the village residents of Yulong…”

‘...Aevri’s hometown…’, Prym thought as she felt the tears prick to her eyes, remembering when her friend was given the grave news of her parents passing away of illness a few years back in school... so sudden and out of nowhere during a seemingly peaceful period of time. Long as it was since the last she saw Mr. and Mrs. Ren, Prym could still plainly recall them both being such kind, healthy-bodied people who wouldn’t hurt a fly… so hearing of them being the unsuspecting victims of such a ghastly plant this whole time was beyond tragic… “...even among our own ranks we’re all too familiar with white plague being inflicted right under us… ” Ivor admitted with a saddened tone, his gaze to Prym signifying she’d know who he’d talk about next, “The night Lady Meradyth had fled, the arrow blades recovered from the crime scene were found to be traced with this blackened poison linked back to the plague root… which, in connection to those other past incidents could only mean one thing..”

Not having to say another word, Alastair let his magic do the talking for him as he enchanted his glowing aura to shapeshift a group of silhouetted figures gathered together, each holding the white plague roots within their hands in an ominous, unified fashion. With that, signifying that whoever was perpetrating these white plague attacks… were all working together in a single, spread-out group.

Hearing all this was already pretty heavy for Prym to bear… breaking her more into confusion as she noticed Taiyin and Alastair turning to leave along with some other guards, “w-wait, where are you going?”

“Continuing the rest of the mission, kid.” Taiyin informed her, thankfully not as harshly as before but still firm enough to try and hold the young dark mage back.

“Yes, if our sensors are correct then its only a matter of time before these plague roots bloom upon the first morning hour. We must give haste at once.” Alastair joined with Taiyin as he packed some quick essentials nearby, looking over to his superior, “General, please inform us if anything stirs around this area while we’re gone, and we shall do the same in return.”

“Noted.” Ivor simply nodded as he gave some silent orders for the two to continue heading out. As much as a part of Prym wanted to say more in perhaps suggesting to go with them or however… her mind was still much too focused on the growing anger she had towards all these suspicions and secrets being kept from her. Not even letting Ivor reach to touch her shoulder in comfort, she had resigned to simply stomp towards the tent to cool off… the shining light of the moon following behind her.

——-

On another section of the sprawled forest, making their way through the thickets was Prince Elas and Tula… seeming to make good headway on the path they were on. Further back they had found some tracks being quite imposing enough to belong to no one else but Tula’s father,

“Okay, looks like it won’t be long to find Papa!” Tula had deducted, feeling some more confidence at finding another cluster of footprints up ahead, “my guess is that he might’ve set up camp just a few trees away, by this rate.”

“Indeed, I can’t say I can find much to disagree with that notion.” Elas gave an approving nod, analyzing some of the tracks for himself, “Seems to me he might’ve had some party members of his own crossing though here, so whatever he may be up to then he’s bound to not be alone…”

Looking on ahead in the direction they were headed to, something inside Tula was feeling… odd, and kind of confused as to how everything was going so smoothly at the moment. Perhaps… a bit too smoothly, as the forest seemed eerily still at this point in time.

“...Elas, does something seem ‘off’ to you?” the young Strength mage pondered, her gaze glancing around for any signs of possible life within the trees or bushes. At first, the prince didn’t seem to detect anything out of place as he stepped ahead… until his foot caught sight of something that made him jump back in shock.

“Oh good Saints, w-what in the world was...?” gathering himself to calm down, Elas took a closer look to find that his shoe had stepped into what looked like a puddle of thick, ghastly-white goo… the contents sizzling a bit under the glow of the moonlight above. Tula had curiously peaked over his shoulder to see what was up… only for them both to jolt back again once the puddle started to bubble and release a hissing, acidic green stench.

“-What is that stuff?? I-I’ve never seen anything like that in these woods!” Tula exclaimed with a clear worry in her tone, “Do you think any of the girls or Kain found-”

Halted in her thoughts was the ear-piercing shriek of something very much inhumane ringing throughout the trees, rattling both her and Elas from standing upright. Careful to at least not fall back in the goop behind them, the two helped pick the other up as within these shrieks, they heard the loud crashing and glowing of magic clashing near the distance ahead.

“-Kain!” Elas deducted, upon recognizing the reddish-orange glow from where he was standing, “He and Aevri must’ve found something dangerous up there, come on!” he encouraged to Tula while instinctively firing up some blue fire in his hands.

Answering back only with a firm nod, Tula didn’t take long to summon up her Strength gauntlets as the two of them hurried on to try and help the other mages. If only they had looked back behind them, they would’ve noticed how that white goo from earlier was beginning to fade away as a figure summoned it back into the darkness…

—-

The normally firm General was in quite an awkward spot having Prym stumbling upon such top secret info as she did… having hoped that tonight could’ve been just a simple detour mission without having to drag any of the kids along. And he knew that hearing the truth about the dangers of white plague had truly shaken her up… so, he knew that he couldn’t have any room to blame her for not being willing to talk to him at the moment while they were alone at the campsite.

A few more minutes would pass before he’d finally make the move to head inside the tent as well… looking to find Prym with her back turned from him, clearly lost in thought and conflicted.

“...Prym, I know what you may be thinking,” Ivor steadily began, trying to keep his tone as delicate as possible, “-But you must understand that this situation was... much too dire and dark for me to just confess it freely among you and the others back home. I simply wished to protect you all-“

“-Protect us from what, Ivor?” Prym finally spoke up, not so much defensively as much as she sounded… tired, “If you haven’t already noticed, me and the girls are not little kids anymore… if you truly meant to be on an important mission regarding these plague plants, then we could’ve understood if you simply told us. Otherwise I thought… well, with the King’s orders and that one lady’s coldness to me, I…”

“...I know. And for that as well, I deeply apologize...” the General lowered his head as he sighed, “Taiyin is quite a strong soldier, noble-hearted as well… but we’ve been meaning to correct her more about not letting her loyalty to the Elite get the better of her towards outsiders. I’ll be sure to have a talk with her when she gets back, I promise.”

Assuring as that thought was, as well as relieved at his genuine apologies… something in Prym’s mind was nagging at her to not let it go. Something regarding one, particular detail that wouldn’t leave her thoughts…

“...Ivor, earlier Lady Taiyin had given me this… really strange response to me mentioning my father Luka. Basically saying he… apparently never existed within the ranks.” Prym had turned to further face the general, looking up with a look of questioning, “You didn’t even directly say that he died within those other plague casualties, simply that there was poison found at that scene where Mother ran away. Is… there something you’re not telling me, Ivor...?”

“...Prym, n-now is not the time to-“ he looked quite shaken by her sudden accusation, but Prym continued to stand her ground further with a firm anger in her tone.

“-No. Now is more than the perfect time to explain- Why is it that all my life, I’ve been told my father was this grand, loving hero of the King’s Elite alongside my mother, giving his life to protect countless innocents… and yet now I learn that’s all apparently been one big lie?? Ivor, please what is the real truth here?? W-Was my father a true soldier, or not?? Was he working for some other party, dealing with some unsavory types?? Please, j-just tell me already, Ivor!”

Steadily her voice began to shake more to a near-sobbing tone, lip quivering as her mind was drifting to all sorts of possibilities… and one more question stuck out the most as she pitifully looked up to the older general,

“Ivor… is my father even alive…?”

Silence quickly fell upon the tent… as Ivor looked conflicted as to how exactly he should answer such a question, let alone in a situation like this. As the seconds were passing into a minute between them, Prym was afraid that… perhaps he wouldn’t give her an answer, that maybe it was a mistake to ask at all after she had already stepped out of line as is… until at last, the still air broke when Ivor delivered a simple, one word answer that changed everything…

“...yes…”

——-

On their end of the forests away from everyone else, things had… really picked up much more chaotically for Kain and Aevri, the two of them now lost in a battle between an eerie group of monsters clamoring around them. Resembling that of tall, ragdoll-like humanoids made of white tree bark… their gaping mouths and hollow eyes dripping with white goo could’ve easily shackled their two foes in complete fear, if they both weren’t so stuck in fighter mode right now.

“-Eat this, bitch!” Kain had exclaimed with some kicks and punches of his crystal magic blasts, encasing the tree-like creatures in red shards that pinned them all to the ground. Aevri in the meantime did her best to defend them both, having summoned her shields to ward off and slice away closing-in enemies.

“Ughhh, will you freaks get the damn hint already?? Piss off!” the Healer mage grunted, swiftly throwing her summoned-shield to knock back some of the foes before it flew back into her arms. Try as they might through their defenses, however… Aevri and Kain could only watch as the monsters had simply risen up more from the ground up, not even seeming phased by their earlier attacks.

“Oh for fuck’s sake… what the hell is keeping these things alive??” Kain cursed while powering up another set of crystal attacks, “Even a wyvern would’ve fallen down by now, shit!”

Before Aevri could’ve answered back with a possibly-snarky retort, their thoughts were halted as they saw a flurry of blue flames burning back the horde of monsters that tried to make a grab at the two… the sender revealing none other than Elas and Tula who had hurried on to join the battle.

“...Greeaaat, perfect timing, bro.” the younger Graystone prince flatly remarked with a roll of his eyes, his brother simply scoffing in response with a flick of his hair, “-Save the backtalk til after we’re safe, Kain.” Letting his companion Tula take the next step in pummeling down some of the creatures with her firsts, she at least gave a more grateful and relieved look to her healer friend at seeing her standing strong in the fight, “-Aevri! Thank the Saints you’re alright! I-I hope these things didn’t hurt you too much…”

“Pff, hey... what would it be a fight without a few scrapes?” Aevri joked a bit to lighten the mood, bringing a small smile to Tula’s face before the both of them turned to ward off the next wave of monsters. It almost seemed concerning just how much these things were reanimating up again despite the waves of attacks… only seeming to keep going and going within the next few minutes to pass.

All… until each of the tree dolls suddenly halted in their place like statues, the melting white goop re-materializing into their eye sockets properly as each of them stood up straight. Confusing the hell out of the mages that were fighting them, the four watched as these dolls started to assemble into some upright positions… almost like an army awaiting their leader approaching. And with a rustle of movement coming from the bushes from behind, that… actually seemed quite closer to the truth as a pair of footsteps came walking out from the dark.

“-Hey! Who’s there??” Aevri turned in the direction of the steps as did the rest of her party, all rearing for another big battle… but then pausing as they finally saw who it was. Turning out to be a pair of hooded, ominous figures greeting them in plain view… their features hidden from where they were standing a lil far back. All until they stepped further into the moonlight was it shown that they were both women, one of them covering their face with a featureless white doll mask… and the other simply smiling back in a rather calm, calculating way.

“Aww… whats wrong, little ones~?” the hooded figure with a mask tilted its head, giggling in a tone that sounded much too saccharine sweet, “Sister and I simply wanted to have a lil playtime with my babies here… don’t be so mean~”

Naturally, this quite frankly creeped out the young mages who were now all the more confused seeing the masked lady stepping over to gently caress one of the tree dolls, as if it were her most prized possession. Compared to everyone else ain was at least trying to mask his unnervedness by standing back more boldly,

“H-Hey, these things of yours attacked us first, lady… what the actual fuck are you on about-??”

“...Hmmmm, temper temper...” came the much more dignified voice of the other woman, shaking her head in Kain’s direction though that smile of hers still remained clear as day, “Is that any way to speak to your family… Kain?”

The once-fierce gaze in Kain’s eyes had… very much evaporated into a look of disbelief upon hearing that voice… the crystal auras in his hands disappearing as they dropped to his sides in shock, “...w-what…?”

Alarmed by his brother’s sudden distress, Elas had turned to try and step up in Kain’s defense as he demanded, “-What in the Saints’ good name are you on about?? Kain is my brother, and I do not recall either of you being anywhere near ‘family’!”

“-Shhhh, manners… young man~” whispered the masked-figure, holding a finger to her lips as all stilled around her… summoning an eerie aura that surrounded the other mages into freezing in place, much like the tree dolls. Unable to do anything but move their heads and faces, Tula, Elas and Aevri all looked on as only Kain was allowed to move on his own… yet all he could do was just shakily stand in place as the unmasked figure slowly approached him… again still smiling that damn smile of hers…

“-No, n-no no you can’t… you can’t be her…!” muttered the now-shaky voice of the usually-haughty prince… trembling as the figure was now up face-to-face with him. Even without being freeze-spelled like the others were, Kain could do nothing but stare as the figure reached up a hand to his face… gently caressing his cheek as her free hand moved to pull back her hood.

Now… there was really no doubt who exactly she was. The striking red hair, the ruby red lips, the amber eyes all too similar to Kain’s… save for the subtle signs of aging, he could never forget a face like that....

“Yes… it is me, my son~”

———

Millions of thoughts were running through Prym’s mind as she recalled what Ivor just confessed to her. Her father… her own father Luka… was alive all this time?? As much as she wanted to celebrate such news, another dark side of her was just reeling at the implications…

Where was her father, all this time she and her mother were in hiding? Why didn’t he come back for them? Was someone keeping him hostage, forcing him in place? What if… what if he willingly chose to abandon her? Not even sparing her a second thought, wherever he’s at now…?

Sensing the growing conflict growing within Prym, Ivor did his best to try and diffuse the situation as he reached to comfort her, “Prym, I… p-please try to understand-“

“-What IS there to understand, Ivor?? Nothing is making sense anymore!” the dark mage exclaimed as she threw up her hands, feeling her tears growing hot as she began to pace back and forth, “You say my father’s apparently alive all this time, but where in Terra IS he?? Obviously he’s not within the Elite ranks now, Mother hasn’t heard from him in ages, and none of the current Elite seem to know who he is! All I want now is the truth, and I want it now!”

“...” Ivor had grown quiet for the moment, heavily sighing as he gestured for Prym to follow him near one of the seats, “I… know this is very much against protocol, but… i-it’s about time you knew, Prym…”

As much as she would’ve liked to argue and stay pouting… the ever-curious side of Prym decided to relent in at least hearing his side of the story out, wiping away her tears with a still-determined look in her eyes. All she could do was watch on as Ivor went and grabbed an old wooden chest to carry over to her, opening the contents to pull out a sealed document folder hidden under some other papers and trinkets inside.

“Prym… your father was a man that had many burdens over him at his age,” the General began to explain, handing Prym the folder as he sat down next to her, “As much as he tried his best to fulfill his duties as a leader… others still feared and hated him for feeling like he took away what wasnt ‘rightfully’ his, on top of the already-detested dark magic he carried. And well… being his oldest friend, I knew that it wouldn’t be healthy for him to linger on all this bad press… so, it was my suggestion that he would involve himself more with our growing Elite forces, to help him lighten up from the stress of it all...”

Within her grasp, Prym flipped open the folder to see the first page contained a picture of Luka’s face on it, with the royal insignia of the Elite stamped below it. With a silent nod from Ivor, she flipped under it to see that inside held some various papers and photos from the old days of Luka’s younger years… from sparring with his troops, to happily posing with some grateful-looking civilians, to joining together with his team to stand vicariously together all at once.

“Overtime, your father grew to fit in well within the Elite for letting him express himself for who he was… beyond all the titles and dark magical stigmas, but as a loyal comrade who’d do anything for the good of Graystone. And since the local civilians didn’t seem to recognize him as a simple soldier like the rest of us, he had even felt comfortable enough to try and help out these communities through his own acts of vigilantism…” Ivor chuckled, unable to resist a small blissful smile at the memory, “Not too surprising that he and your mother grew to get along a lot well in that department, denying as they were at first...”

Pausing for a moment from browsing through the folder, Prym looked over to Ivor with a look of puzzlement, “...So, if you say my Father did all these great things for the people… why would they turn on him because he performed some darker magic spells than normal? I know Mother had mentioned that he enraged some uptight army for his necromancy, but…”

“...W-Well, truth be told, that... wasn't exactly the ‘full’ reason for his eventual attack, Prym...” Ivor admitted, rubbing the back of his neck, “Luka, well-meaning as he was… at the same time was always rather stubborn and reckless when it came to what he thought was the right thing to do, regardless of the possible consequences ahead. There was no better example for when he had stepped out of protocol in one of our missions against a local crime-lord of the downtown New Grayle district… Boss Byzantine.”

“Byzantine…?” Prym blinked, steadily recognizing that surname after a bit of thought, “-One of Kaz’s bully friends shared that name back in school… Cable Byzantine.”

“Ahh, yes… the Boss would’ve been Cable’s father, from what I recall of that man.” Ivor gave a nod of acknowledgement, “Often kept to himself apart from the few public appearances with his family… most wouldn’t even know much else of him aside from that automobile company of his. But well… we as the Elite were having our growing suspicions after examining more of how poorly the downtown area was, and interviewing the locals terrorized from his gang’s past attacks. And thanks to one of our undercover operatives, Sgt. Kodiak, we had not only started to put any and all accomplices in jail, but had planned in the near future to soon put Byzantine to justice too. Luka, however… well, turns out he had decided to take fate into his own hands by cornering the Boss one day in his office with his dark magic… giving into temptation with his soul-ripping spells to really show the crooked man who he was messing with…”

The air seemed to grow heavier as Ivor quickly grew quiet again, his gaze going back to the chest’s contents as he pulled out something else from under all the papers… a locket with a purple moon gem symbol on the front, “...In the end, thanks to some nearby guards catching wind of his actions, Luka wasn’t fully able to be rid of Byzantine as he hoped… but that would soon seal his fate as the Boss had subtly planned a “vengeance” of his own. And so, a few years later Luka and Meradyth had made plans to head into the Downtown area for a quick errand, picking up this upcoming birthday present for you...” explaining as he gently placed the pendant within the girl’s hands, eyes closing as he painfully recalled further...

“...and, just as they were heading back home… they were ambushed. A mix of Byzantine’s own men and a few hired hands from the army Luka has disgraced, together overwhelmed the couple in more ways than one. Within all the smoke, blades, and spells being thrown around it was practically impossible for either of them to evade it all on their own…”

“So, how exactly did my father manage to survive from it all...?” Prym turned her gaze to ask, a hand gently resting onto Ivor’s as he felt himself getting shaken by the recollecting… only pressing on further for Prym’s sake, “-Through having to spend a good chunk of his aura energy on teleporting Meradyth away from safety, and the last of it to unleash one, devastating blast to ward off the remaining foes, they were defeated and got taken into custody… but at a grave cost to Luka, himself. Our troops, try as we did to bring him back to heal him up, just weren’t able to stop the plague-induced infections from slipping him into a deep sleep. Hours had turned to days, and days turned to weeks… and throughout it we were beginning to lose hope. Finally, at last he was able to wake up and face us again, b-but…”

It was here that Ivor had turned to look back at Prym, placing a hand to her shoulder as he delivered the news that had shattered the shred of hope she had earlier...

“Prym… h-he didn’t recognize us anymore, and… neither could he remember either you or your mother when we tried to tell him after waking up…”

“...W… What? No… n-no that can’t be right..!” the dark mage bitterly broke into a sobbing mess, shaking her head in near-denial, “-What kind of father would just up and forget his own loved ones, his own family?? P-Please tell me this isn’t true, Ivor! Please…!”

“...I-I’m sorry, Prym...” a guilt-ridden Ivor muttered, instinctively pulling Prym in for a tight hug despite her protesting sobs, “We tried all we could, believe me we did… but this plague proved to be the most resilient curse on our fellow comrade, even with the best medicinal help. Showing him pictures, records, and home videos did little to jog his memory… after awhile, he started refusing our help all together despite our protests…”

Soon, even as toughened as he usually was… even Ivor has begun to shed some tears as he held Prym close,

“He’s changed so much as time further passed, Prym.. not even going by his name anymore whether he’s off duty or not these days. To the point where eventually we just decided to never bring up the subject of Luka anymore, with the very few remaining soldiers from our old ranks swearing to silence never to speak of him either. As much as we wanted to reunite him with you both in the coming years, we just… w-we didn’t want to task the risk if anything were to… well, go wrong…”

To say that this did anything to soothe Prym’s heartbroken state would be a lie… as in the minutes that passed her furious sobs had silenced into mere whimpers, whilst Ivor continued to do his best to hold and comfort her as if she were his own child. In some ways, this news had devastated her even more than her initial thoughts of her father being deceased. To even imagine having to go through as much as he did, miraculously surviving but erased of his own memories like that… it was beyond crushing of a thought...

...Yet, the more she had paused to think on this info, the more she began to realize the implications of what exactly Ivor meant by Luka not going by his name anymore. Thinking back to the folder left next to her, she couldn’t help herself in pulling away from Ivor… desperately flipping through until her eyes caught sight of the last page. Her father’s medical file.

And this time, even Ivor didn’t move to stop her as he defeatedly looked away, accepting that she had to know this sooner than later...

...our current patient has been confirmed to have been inflicted with trauma-induced memory loss, and by royal order we have been requested to withhold further treatment by his end. Our staff has grown worried with his own past history of ongoing PTSD and Chronic Depression, but well… as our fellow staff had put it, an order’s an order.

With a heavy heart, this concludes our progress into looking after our patient of the past year and a half... Luka Grayle.

[4328fox]

Ordination Day

summary: Yuri is invited to the event that would make Ioder and Flynn's positions official. Some things are bound to change as a result. The question is whether or not one is able to accept such change.

notes: pairing is fluri, though this is set pre-relationship. Also, TOV spoilers everywhere!

Once again, I’d like to thank everyone who helped me as I was writing this!

Wordcount is (almost) 13k words. here’s a link to AO3, if you’d rather read it there!

You’re sitting by a windowsill, in an inn in Aurnion. You wrapped up a quick delivery job for someone here earlier. Normally, you wouldn’t have lingered here. While thinking about your circumstances, you glance down to a piece of paper, still resting on your lap. The core of your blastia glints under the moonlight.

Please come to Master Ioder’s ordination.

Flynn won’t even put a proper invitation in, but you’d thrown it out if he did. He knew that very well too. Still, you wondered why he bothered asking.

You stretch a bit, letting out a huff that might just be you mocking the letter. You actually did consider ignoring this altogether. Saying it got lost in the mail, or something. You didn’t want to be mixed into this, not when you had little reason to.

Writing has never been in your style either, but you’d write back to Flynn, to keep in touch with him. He made you promise to, because after the Adephagos was dealt with, it would mean going your separate ways again. Not that you didn’t run into him, sometimes. Or pretty often, even. It’s a well-known fact that your luck is cursed, and Flynn doesn’t know when to leave things be. You wonder if Flynn ever spends time in his room.

Another letter came a day after Flynn’s, this time from Estelle. It must have been serious enough that she went out of her way to write to you, but you already had a sneaking suspicion it wasn’t the emergency you expected.

Yuri, I know that you insisted I throw out that uniform when you caught me sneaking it in your bag, but I held on to it. Once you come here, I’ll let you have it again. It’s for Ioder and Flynn’s ceremony!

And of course it’s Flynn’s ceremony too. As of now, you don’t know what to expect, aside that it’s both Emperor and Commandant ordinations going down in one event. It's hardly surprising that Flynn wouldn’t put any weight on his official promotion taking place.

For a while, the ordination has been the talk of Terca Lumireis. Estelle’s teacher mentioned it before you and Brave Vesperia stopped the world’s end. And after the loss of the barriers, people needed to hold on to something that wouldn’t spark anxiety. Of all places, even Dahngrest began talking about it.

You stretch again. You suppose you should get going to bed, because you have a long day ahead of you tomorrow. You step over to the sleeping Repede, recounting how you turned down Judy’s offer to fly you to Zaphias today. With the main event two days away, you felt like you wanted to take the long route, instead. At least some people established that dock that was made to connect Illycia and Hipionia.

And unless someone were to ask Judy and Karol, no one really knows you’re here. Not that it truly matters, but there’s already going to be some amount of attention on you when you’re in the capital. A small reprise of privacy doesn’t hurt anyone.

You have to nudge Repede a little before you can comfortably lay down in bed. The warmth of your partner is calming, and distracting enough to lull you to sleep.

You are anything but a morning person, but you wake up early due to your gut squeezing at you. Just from trying to comb through your hair with a hand, you can already feel where it tangled up.

The next thing you know, you’ve taken semblance of a decently-looking person, now checking out of the inn. You and Repede note the nice weather outside, the town bustling with life more and more with each new visit you make here. It reminds you of the Lower Quarter. The community here is growing to be just as close-knit too, and you can’t not smile while passing some kids, they’re already running wildly at this hour. There were less of them last time you were here, and you didn’t realise that until this morning.

What you do realise, however, is that a fair-haired Commandant has no business being in Aurnion today. You can’t make out much of him from this distance, but he is armored as ever. He seems to have been handing some reports. You never get how Flynn is this chipper so early in the day, but the sun shining and reflecting on his pauldrons gives him a brighter look. From a certain angle, it would even be blinding.

You make eye contact with him, and he’s already distracted from whatever conversation he was having with the captain stationed here. You stand there, a building or so away by now, as he excuses himself and steps over to you and Repede.

“Yuri, what are you doing here?” he smiles at you in surprise, but you catch his eye twitching, subconsciously. He kneels to greet Repede too, who is ecstatic to see him.

“That’s what I’m wondering. You should be in Zaphias.” You cross your arms as you study his body language more. He doesn’t seem to have packed much on his person, much like yourself. And his hair is its usual messy. He looks up at you, and he squints, actually, because the sunlight hit his eyes.

“I had a blastia thief to deal with. I had to act.”

Of course he did. These cases are singular and not too common, thankfully, but Flynn takes each and every one of them himself. You can tell he still looks slightly breathless, he must have run all the way here.

He stands up to meet your eyes. “And you? I thought Ba’ul would give you a ride.”

“He and Judy have plenty to do. I was just sightseeing here.” You offer a grin, but Flynn must already know that you’re here for a guild job, not looking entirely impressed.

“Well, if we both happen to be here, would you like to go back to Zaphias together?” Before you can even open your mouth, he continues, “We can catch up, and all.”

“We can catch up during your ceremony too,” and he instantly gets a bit exasperated at what you’re trying to imply, even if you’re just joking. “But, yeah, we are going in the same direction. Will your knights mind me taking you away from them for a day?”

Flynn tries not to grin at the way you phrased it, but he now looks like he’s grimacing. “Not ‘my knights’. But just give me a few. I’ll be ready to head out soon.”

You nod at each other, and you instead take your walk’s direction for the entrance of Aurnion. Repede woofs at you and you can’t help but sigh. So much for some alone time.

Not that Flynn is a bother beyond his nagging, but you should have suspected something like this would have happened. In fact, you usually do expect it, it’s a habit you picked up from the past year and a half. While you don’t seek his blue uniform out in a crowd, you do strain your ears for his voice, for some indication that he’s in the same place as you again.

If you didn’t run into each other just now, you would have instead come to Zaphias hearing that he’s running late on preparations for his own special day. Because something’s always bound to come up. The moment Flynn notices an issue, he obsesses over it until he gets it dealt with.

You lean against the entrance of the town, Repede barking as you exchange conversation with him. It isn’t long until Flynn is back at your side and ready to go, somewhat brighter and less sleep-deprived. He scratches behind Repede’s ears one more time before you three officially exit the premises of Aurnion.

The first group of monsters you come across is not overwhelming, but you were struggling to take a breather. It’s good that you packed healing items, and that Repede is so fast. Once able to continue on walking, you find yourself a bit too worn out to offer much of your usual quips. Though it’s because you spend some time in silence that you notice something is eating at Flynn. You should get him to talk.

“Flynn-”

“Yuri-”

You both stop to look at one another. Repede barks, as if to join in.

“You first,” Flynn insists. “I don’t mean to interrupt.”

“Nah, I was going to ask you why you look so nervous. Out with it.”

You give him a look, and he somehow resists rolling his eyes. “I was wondering what you’ve been up to. Besides guild jobs.”

“That’s all?”

“What else should there be?” At a loss for words, you cross your arms. You spot a large enough rock and make a move to go sit on it, but Flynn speaks again. “We don’t need a break for this.”

“...I suppose you’re right. But let me think.”

“Ever so busy, I take?” You can hear the grin in his voice, and you have to push down the urge to tell him to shut it, before his teasing even began.

As you all continue walking, you’re wondering out loud, recounting if anything potentially interesting happened with you. There’s you and the guild looking for a more permanent residence. Flynn assures you that you would all be welcome to Zaphias, if you so wanted. You think a bit more, but decide against it. Too many knights, among other things, wouldn’t make it so ideal. Though you get the feeling you made him disappointed voicing that.

You throw in a story or two between rambling, and he at least offers enough of a conversation so it doesn’t feel disgustingly one-sided. Flynn then gives a story of his own, and talks about another success that he and Ioder managed against the council. The pride bubbles up in you, you say how them working together like this has resulted in a lot more progress being made than what Alexei had seemingly done in his entire time as Commandant. Flynn makes a troubled response, unable to argue against it, and conversation quickly dies.

The silence settling becomes a suffocating one, you both can tell. Alexei is still a sore topic. Flynn tries again by asking “You haven’t been in my new quarters, right?”, which is possibly one of the worst ways to follow up a topic concerning Alexei.

But you humor him anyway. “Is that a special invitation? I thought ordinary people have no business there.”

“Yuri, you’re no ordinary person.”

“Whatever, still not castle staff. But no, you only wrote to me about it. Didn’t it take a while to convince you to move there?”

Flynn flushes a bit, but continues. “It’s still weird. It’s too big, it makes me wonder if there’s any use in repurposing it.”

“Into what?”

“I haven’t thought of it... “

Repede just then barks, and sprints ahead. You turn, and notice the docks. You pick up the pace. Once closer, you now see a few knights positioned there to keep watch. They instantly regard Flynn with the utmost respect. They instantly recognize you too, as a friend of the Commandant. You find it weird.

By the time Flynn started talking to them, probably about some knight things that don’t concern a criminal like you, you and Repede have already decided to board the ship yourselves. There are a few more passengers, but there are also various cargoes going in and out of the ship. It’s probably supply exchanges between the two continents.

You directly head for one of the cabin rooms. Once there, Repede settles comfortably over the bed. You sit down too.

...Maybe you should ask someone at the castle to patch up this Dhaos cape. The winds are less harsh with it on, and it gives you a weird sense of strength fighting with it. As you go through your things, you find your bag weirdly empty on supplies. “Was this your doing?” you ask in Repede’s direction, who only barks back indignantly. Maybe Flynn is low on gels too.

Not that you can exactly ask Flynn now, because he has things to do. Flynn runs on tasks and missions all the time at this point, you would hardly be surprised if he comes here apologising, because he found he needs to take a detour in Halure, or something.

The cabin door opens after some time, revealing him. “And here’s the guy who drained me of my Apple gels again.” You say dryly.

Flynn doesn’t relax from whatever tension he built up. While he doesn’t look visibly nervous, you can tell his throat dried up on the way here. He still frowns at your remark. “I don’t think I threw that many at you this time.”

You grin, you’re already scooting over to give Flynn the sitting space. “I’d say you owe me gels, but stuff them in your own mouth next time, alright?”

“I doubt I came in here to hear that from you, of all people.” From how close you both are now, you can hear something in his body crack slightly upon sitting on the bed.

“And I doubt I was ready to be low on apple gels now.”

“Yuri…”

“I’m just saying!”

“You’re impossible.” Flynn finally slinks back to lay down, and you can hear the metal of his armor click here and there as he positions himself comfortably enough. You watch the way he stretches his torso, and the way he arches ever so slightly, as a pleased sigh escapes his lips. Your eyes trail up to his own, and you find that he’s looking back at you, smiling.

Something on your face threatens to make you smile too, so you cover it up by talking: “Don’t tell me you’re actually sleeping like this.”

“Will you really kick me off for it?” his pointed look only said hypocrite.

“Right. So did you come here because you haven’t had enough of me yet?”

“I can handle a lot before I get enough of you.”

“Sure, say that. But we might be stuck at the hip until nighttime.” You lay back down in the same fashion Flynn has, and now you’re both relaxing side by side, staring at the ceiling. Seconds pass before you ask. “You did leave someone else to handle the organizing at Zaphias, right?”

Flynn sighs a bit. “Lady Estellise insisted she would. And I’d rather not dwindle with something if someone else can do it better.”

“Estelle knows her stuff, yeah. At least you get less time with the council before the main event.” Flynn groans, and you can’t not chuckle. “What now?”

“Nothing, I’m just thankful for Lady Estellise and Master Ioder dealing with them while letting me take on actually important tasks.”

“Wow, you’re kinda honest for once. Are you sure no one is eavesdropping on you to hear how sick you are of the council now?” You mockingly peer at the door, and Flynn shoves you as you laugh.

“It’s not that. But they’d be on my back for taking on emergencies now. They’d say-”

“That you have other knights to handle this? That you can just stay in the capital?” Flynn shoots you a glance, but he shakes his head a little.

“Almost. But I imagine they’d use that argument too.” He swallows a bit. “Do you think so, too?”

You rest your arms behind your head as you think. “Kind of. But I know this is in your style. And I know how much of a pain in the ass these guys are. If someone’s helping you so you didn’t deal with them as much, then may as well focus on something more important. You don’t seem to be taking this ordination that seriously, anyway.”

Flynn laughs helplessly. “If you passed through Zaphias first, I’d be wondering if Lady Estellise told you something. It’s more that it isn’t something to throw a big deal about.” And there he goes again. His own ceremony. “At this point, the council can’t really influence who Master ioder can officially appoint a Commandant. That’s all there is to it.”

You can’t help feeling amused at the idea of those snobs gritting their teeth, knowing they’d continue dealing with Flynn, the stubborn mule, for years to come. Yeah, maybe the Empire’s left in really good hands. “But it feels like a ceremony wouldn’t be too necessary.”

“I’m not surprised you think that, actually.”

“Not for the reasons you think. Everyone back in Dahngrest thought you’re already the permanent choice.”

“Yeah, but things will change after the ordination.”

“You think? Your authority as Commandant isn’t going to increase from what you’ve told me before.” And that’s where Flynn shifts a bit, as if the way he’s laying in his armor is uncomfortable now.

“Yuri, how about the outfit you’ll wear tomorrow?”

“Hey, don’t change the subject.”

“But really now, I was relieved to hear you haven’t done anything to the clothes I gave you all this time ago. Lady Estellise hadn’t told me anything of their fate…”

“I still can’t believe you’re trying to push me to wear that! What’s with my current clothes?”

“Nothing bad, but I just want you to look good for tomorrow!”

“I look fine as I am-”

Poor Repede has to bark at you twice to get you to stop being so loud, and you decide to let it be, letting the conversation calm down into something less likely to spark anything between you and Flynn. Well, at least not in the argumentative sense. You didn’t realise you started shoving one another.

You look at Flynn again. He’s closed his eyes, humming a bit. It sounds familiar, but you can’t seem to put a finger on what the song is. Something about how nice his features look when the bastard isn’t being a pain passes through your mind, and you get an urge to raise your hand and brush some of his hair off his forehead. At least the signal of the ship nearing the docks is enough to distract you from unnecessary thoughts.

It’s still about early afternoon when you finally begin trekking through Illycia, but it would take about a few hours to get to the capital. Repede seems to be the liveliest after the boat trip, but he’s also the only one in the group who got any sleep in. You let him run ahead, and he occasionally stops just far enough to still see you and Flynn, waits for you to catch up, and then runs some more.

By now you know that there’s something up with Flynn.

You take another good look at him, from head to toe. Flynn seems to notice, but doesn’t question you.

You’d think he knows by now why Ioder chose him to do what Alexei couldn’t, there’s no time to wallow in self-doubt…! It isn’t even a matter of succeeding previous Commandants, but carving out a new path to go far and beyond. Is he still reluctant in his abilities as a knight? He’s over some unfamiliar superiors trying to get under his skin, you’ve seen firsthand that he can handle any insult thrown at him.

But it could be that Flynn is that uncomfortable with being in the limelight. Not to mention the way he’s humble to a fault, it’s hard to get him to accept any praise. Back before Zaude came crashing down, he noted how it isn’t even his praise to accept. Isn’t it why he and Ioder tried to give you some official recognition in the first place?

Is Flynn talking to anyone about his doubts at all? Because he sure as hell doesn’t tell you a single thing. He could bother to write more beyond typical pleasantries in his letters to you.

And even though walking usually gets your mind off of things, your concern doesn’t leave. The closer Zaphias gets, you feel even more annoyed. Not only did Flynn (likely) internalise another set of self-deprecating statements, that you still don’t know how to force out of him, but a form of dread took hold of you, because you really don’t want to be dealing with any of this. Your grip on the cloth holding the sheath of Second Star tightens.

And it’s probably because you tuned out of the conversation at some point, but Flynn now squeezes your shoulder. “Yuri, are you listening at all?”

You’re suddenly hyper-aware of both his gloved hand on you, as well as the phantom feeling of your nails having dug into the palm of your own hand.

“Sorry. I was thinking again. What were you saying?”

Flynn, thankfully, moves his hand away, and continues. He keeps an eye on you. “I was telling you about tomorrow.”

“Actually, is it necessary for me to even be in the castle the entire time?” You spit this out without a thought.

“What? Of course you need to be there for most of it. That’s one of the reasons I invited you.”

“No, but see, can I just sneak in and out at certain intervals, so I’d be there only when I’m really needed? I would have much more fun being near fellow commoners and stuffing my face with non-snobbish foods.” You sound angrier than intended.

“Yuri, what are you on this time? You have a reason to be at the ceremony!”

“And what is it, to have some assholes gawk at my being there while they make Ioder’s position official?”

“Is that what’s bothering you?” There’s a pause you almost miss. “No, I actually need-”

“I don’t want to hear what the reason is.” Flynn shuts his mouth then, stupefied, before his face looks less surprised, and more frustrated. You can’t hold back. “Just out with it already, Flynn. Something’s bothering you, not me. Focus on your own problems, for a change.”

He almost says something, but instead looks past you.

“Wait, Yuri.”

It annoys you, so you raise your voice to get him to look. “No. You clearly want to talk now, so let’s do that now!”

“There’s monsters!” He shoves you, to run past you, and you finally turn to notice a horde of said monsters running from the direction you came from. Flynn strikes the one leading the charge. Repede barks in alert too, and rushes into the group beyond you. You have a weird sense of deja vu.

Fighting off some wild boars isn’t entirely unusual, but there sure are a lot of them. You strain yourself beyond your limit to push them aside with your artes. Maybe this is the spirits’ messed up way of telling you not to start fights in the fields.

You dig into your bag to grab another orange gel… only to see you have none left. You curse under your breath, and slash at another boar charging at you. You realise that Flynn’s speed in casting Holy Lance and Mistral soul has considerably lessened, which means he is also out of gels.

And a quick look at Flynn tells you that he’s looking pretty bad already. In order to pave an escape plan, you need to get him to stop casting altogether. You try to yell at him to get a move on, into a direction that diverges a bit from the path to Zaphias.

Not that this works. Repede howls from behind, and you realise that Flynn got surrounded. A boar must have hit him while trying to move, because now he’s resorted to slashing at them with just a sword. He’s barely able to raise his shield.

To hell with these boars. Repede is already taking on the attack a few feet away from Flynn, but neither of them are able to attentively keep in mind the one coming from behind him. Another slash like this could end fatally, and this isn’t where Flynn Scifo should fall. This is where you come in.

“Flynn, stay still!” You yell out hoarsely, and plant yourself by his back and block with your sword. The boar jabs right into your arm and growls fiercely in your face, but you’re hardly bothered by the burning sensation. You punch the ground, shouting out “Destruction field!” from which the boars are sent flying, then crashing into the ground.

There is one monster left standing, but you make no move for it, being at your limit now. You hear Repede’s running, and as expected, he lands the definitive blow. Good boy…

A pair of hands clutch at you before you fall to your knees. At least Flynn minds the arm that got the worst of it.

“Hey, good job, Commandant. Anywhere hurt?”

“Stay still.”

“Flynn, it’s fine. Just hand me a gel.”

“We don’t have any gels.”

“Shit.” You knew that already. “I can cast Guardian Field-”

“You are not using a sword in this state.” Flynn moves to sit you down, and that’s when you realise how close he is to you. The warmth his arms bring out almost makes you forget how much your arm hurts. You watch him double-check his bag again, but there’s no use in that, it’s clearly empty. Repede noses over to sit as well, on alert, in case any newcomer monsters want a round.

With this proximity, you can sense Flynn growing frantic long before it gets apparent on his face. At least he doesn’t look too upset. “We can just wait until the bleeding stops. I’ve had worse.”

“Just let me treat you.” A small, shaky breath. “Divine favour upon you.” Magic focuses around you all, and you can’t even protest, before he says the word. “Cure!”

Magic reinvigorates you, your arm in particular, until nothing hurts anymore. Your vision clears, and it’s Flynn who crumbles, dropping the sword you didn’t even notice he was still holding.

It takes you a second to process what just happened. “What the hell, Flynn! We don’t have gels!” And now it’s your turn to hold onto him, and shit, he looks worse than you thought. You lay him down, so he could at least stop feeling so tense in your arms. “You’re not Estelle, you’re barely able to cast without a blastia!”

“It’s fine, Yuri.” He smiles at you, and that fact infuriates you.

He’s leaning on you as he lays, close to losing consciousness, maybe more, and he looks anything but fine. That fact infuriates you.

“What will everyone say if you died here? Don’t waste your energy when you’re expected back in the capital, asshole! The empire needs you!”

“Is that all there is to it? The empire needs me?”

There’s a beat. You feel like you almost missed it, even if you just saw the way Flynn’s expression dropped. “I can’t die, because the empire needs me?”

Something glasses in his eyes.

“The hell are you-”

“Am I really that irreplaceable…” His eyes are closing, but he’s struggling to keep them open. “That I can’t even…” Flynn is clutching a bit at his chest now, where his blastia would have been. Something in you says to at least take his hand, to guide it away from his heart, but you can’t find it in you to do so.

You can’t even say a thing. For the longest moment you feel like his eyes are piercing right through you, until his strength finally gives out, and he falls unconscious. The way his voice sounded just now is enough to haunt you in your next dream.

The silence that settles on the fields is uncomfortable, to say the least. Repede’s nudging forces you out of the blank state in your mind right now. You grab Second Star to cast Guardian Field, just in case.

If Flynn just let you do this in the first place, him passing out could have been avoided. He’s always putting himself in harm’s way, and for what?

“You’re not thinking rationally.” You hear yourself mumbling. You take off your cape, and drape it over Flynn’s body, just as the wind picks up. “You worry too much.”

At least Repede can watch your back while you can’t bring yourself to stay attentive. It’s less about being exhausted (because little by little, you feel your power coming back to you), but more about everything else about this.

While the fields and tall grass are the worst place to sleep in, Mayoccia plains offer some weird sense of comfort. It’s just the three of you in a large space, with the breeze being your only threat. At some point, you’ve moved Flynn’s head to rest on your lap, to at least reduce the risk of him catching a cold out here.

He’s still incredibly warm. Maybe armor does wonders to keep the heat in. Or maybe it’s his very determination burning strong. You focus on the sensation of Flynn’s hair on your fingers.

He feels so relaxed, for once. Maybe the things he said before passing out were part out of the sheer exhaustion he must be running on. The ordination got to him to such a point, that seeing you get roughed up a bit set him off and made his rationality slip.

But even something about that doesn’t sound right.

You look at how his chest rises and falls. Your eyes move to gaze at his face, and you can’t even bear looking at it for more than a few seconds. Guilt is catching up to you, knowing that snapping at him did nothing to help the situation. At what point is getting mad at him for his confidence in leading the knights justified, and at what point is it overdoing it? Are you any better than the very people that fed into Flynn’s insecurities to begin with?

Your hand continues brushing Flynn’s hair, however, and at least that gives you some clarity that he’s right here, where you left him to rest. That, for now, is good enough.

You finally distract yourself by talking to Repede. It helps pass the time.

Flynn eventually shifts to wakefulness on his own. “Yuri?” he looks up groggily, and you finally gaze into his eyes for the first time since what felt like ages. “How long was I out?”

“About an hour. Are you feeling better?” No, he isn’t.

“Just weird.” He gets up to move, and it doesn’t resemble the movement of a guy who had just passed out. That’s good news, for starters.

You need a moment or two to get up, because your legs fell asleep while waiting. It takes you three a bit to gather yourselves, and to continue the walk to the capital.

“Thank you.” You turn to look at Flynn offering you a smile, but you can tell it isn’t reaching his eyes.

“Yeah, I’m glad I can help.” You did not even comfort him.

But neither of you address it. As you go on, Zaphias gradually stops being a looming presence ahead of you. You’re still not used to seeing its barrier being absent, but otherwise it looks nearly the same as usual. The only actually notable difference is the way many knights are stationed to keep watch of any corner which could allow monsters to rush in.

By now, you’re finally approaching the gates to the Public Quarter. You hoped to at least go through the Lower Quarter, but it’s not like you can split up from Flynn now, because you both are headed for the castle.

Some knights are already saluting you like you’re some great hero, and the discomfort settles in again. Maybe you’re getting a taste of what it was like for Duke at least a decade ago. Or Raven, for that matter, when he would need to be present as Shwann. You wave at the guards. Maybe it would get them to drop the formalities with you. They wouldn’t be saluting you if you weren’t friends with their Commandant.

And once you do go in, the public stares begin almost instantly, but they’re less directed at you, and directed more at Flynn. You hear some whisper or two about you being so close to the Commandant, but only a few people manage to recognize you.

People pay attention to who you’re friends with. Sodia is (or was) a walking example of this. That Flynn is still friends with a criminal would mean it’s easy to bend and twist whatever good image he’s trying to keep with the council.

And maybe Flynn dreads dealing with the council tomorrow because of you. He knows he can’t change you. But then why go through the pain of having you here, especially after you rejected the title of “free paladin”?

...You rarely see the city get so busy out on the streets at this hour. The decorations and scent of feasts for tomorrow are indicative of how dedicated people are to making this day special. It makes you think back to the Lower Quarter, and how they must be preparing to celebrate too.

And the day after tomorrow, you’ll get to be on your own again.

Before you realise it, you reach the Royal Quarter. It’s significantly quieter than the rest of Zaphias, as usual. Flynn turns to look back at the stairs you came from. “I didn’t think the Public Quarter would be this excited.”

“Yeah, they seem to be in high spirits. I’d rather that than to hear them boo you the entire way.”

“I’m sure there’s some people that would gladly do that instead.” Flynn laughs.

“That’s to be expected. Didn’t you tell me some people failed to find fault in Alexei?”

A hum. You two continue walking, some knights salute you, and some nobles stop and stare, like they can’t mind their business. You ignore some of the looks they give you.

“Just let them be for now.” You say. “Some people can’t accept change, and that’s their problem.” Flynn hums again, but it sounds just as inattentive as the other one. It makes you turn to him. “Right?”

Flynn has been looking at you, troubled again, and it takes him a second to realise he’s caught staring. You give a confused look. He sighs and gives in.

“Sorry, Yuri. I was just thinking how everyone must be frustrated that we took so long.”

“They can wait a bit more. You’re not in charge of preparations, anyway.” And didn’t he leave of his own volition? If he’s so bothered by burdening Estelle and Ioder, he really should have just sent in Sodia or whoever to rush toward Aurnion’s general direction all night.

The opening and closing of castle doors is when the ringing in your ears finally comes to a halt. You don’t understand early celebrations.

“Oh, Flynn, you’re just in time.” a youthful voice says. “And is that Yuri I see? It’s good to have you here once more.” Ioder was just walking past the stained glass when you came in. He seems enthusiastic.

“Yo. I had to drag your workaholic Commandant all the way from Hipionia.” You say, and you already hear Flynn grumble in protest. “But take it easy on him, he needs a twelve-hour nap.”

Ioder chuckles, much to Flynn’s dismay. “I do appreciate the gesture. Please, make yourself comfortable. We have some matters to attend to with Flynn, but I believe Estellise is in the castle gardens, if you wish to see her.”

And that’s your next destination. You part ways with Flynn for now, who’s surely more than happy to get a breather away from your company. Repede stays back too, wanting to follow him around for once.

Decorum is all over the hallways. You do have to hand it to the staff here, working hard to make something out of ordination day.

And there’s still a dozen or so workers who are doing some wrap ups for today in the garden. Estelle is in the center of the cogwheel, offering her final input on things. It’s nice to see, she’s really having fun. Once she notices you, she even begins waving very ecstatically. That’s your cue to walk over to her, so she didn’t rush out of whatever she’s doing now. But that still doesn’t stop her from giving you a hug!

“It’s been so long!” You hear her exclaim. She must be exaggerating a bit, but hey, you do feel the sentiment too. You pat her on the head, your ribs aching a little once she lets go of you.

“It sure had been.” You take another look around yourself. “You’re really doing wonders here.”

“It’s just everyone’s combined effort coming to fruition. And we’re nearly done, too.”

“I can go over there” you point vaguely to some distant area of the garden, “and wait for you to wrap up. I’m not in a rush.”

“Sure!” She pauses, but then says: “Have you seen Flynn? He’s been gone since yesterday.”

“Oh, yeah, he’s in the castle now, we got here together. If you need to talk to him first-”

“No, it’s fine! I can see him later. I was worried, is all.”

At least that’s out of her head. You decide it’s best to let her finish up here, so you stroll over to the place you pointed at just now. Estelle shouldn’t take too long, but it’s gotten late enough that trying the clothes today would be pointless. You have the boars to thank for that.

You rest at the bench for some time, the left-and-right movement all over the garden being the one thing keeping your eyes open. The more you think about it, though, the more you realise that you actually have no clue of what the ordination will be like. You didn’t really pay attention when Flynn tried to explain to you.

Stretching a bit, your mind wanders back to Dahngrest, instead. You know that Harry got an invitation too, as is expected, but you’re the only guildsman outside of the Union that was invited. Karol, Judy and even Patty are too busy to come, but you wouldn’t be surprised to see Rita here. Last time you heard from her, she said she had better to do than play dress up for the capital, but knowing how persuasive Estelle is… Maybe she somehow is busy too, though. Out of everyone, Raven seems the likeliest to make an appearance for tomorrow. But he’d be keeping a distance, probably. You envy him.

You didn’t know you were dozing off, not until you snap your eyes open to Estelle calling out to you. She hands you what seems to be a warm sandwich, and you accept it gratefully. Hunger slipped your mind entirely.

“Sorry to have kept you waiting.” Estelle tells you.

“It’s fine. Flynn really left you with all the work.”

Estelle sits next to you on the bench. “Not quite, it was manageable. But I wanted to make sure we can handle everything going on tomorrow.”

“Damn, how long is this ceremony?”

“The ceremony itself? Not too long, I think. But most of the preparations we did today are for the celebrations afterwards.”

“Oh, right. The nobles’ party. Is that one mandatory?” Estelle laughs as you bite into the sandwich.

“It is mandatory. I don’t think you need to stay for all of it, but…”

“Let me guess, Flynn wants me to?”

She’s a bit surprised that you took the words out of her mouth.

“I already came all the way here, I may as well indulge in rich people's food. Flynn also supposedly had intent of showing me that new sleeping quarters of his. Have you been there?”

“Oh yes, it’s huge!” She gesticulates with her arms to emphasise. “Back when it was still Alexei’s, I was never allowed to wander there, not even in the hallway leading up to it. Flynn’s jaw almost dropped when we were finally granted access to clean it up... ”

Between Estelle’s dramatic retelling of the events, you manage to ask how she’s been, and how her writing’s been going. She says she only gets to sit down and add to her story when she isn’t travelling, but you imagine she still carries her journals around to note any ideas she gets.

With some convincing, she has you agree to get up at sunrise to get you dressed. “We could have avoided this if you came here sooner.” Estelle says. You don’t tell her why you were delayed in the first place. You don’t tell her you had intentions of skipping this altogether, either.

Repede eventually makes his reappearance, evading Estelle’s attempts at patting him for the nth time. You usher Estelle to go see Flynn, since he must be free now. Meanwhile, you decide to get some shut eye back in the Lower Quarter. Despite Estelle offering a room for you for the night, you don’t accept it. You don’t know when else you’ll be able to talk to everyone down there before you’d need to go back to Dahngrest again.

...You do feel like there is never enough time to catch up with everyone you don’t see for an extensive amount of time.

“Get it through your head, already! We’re happy just to hear from you!”

Hanks would say this to you each time you and Repede make way for the room that the Comet still keeps vacant for you.

You feel nostalgic just being here. You walk to the bed, toss your boots off, and lay down. Repede follows suit. The room is barren by now, you’ve long since packed the few things you had into a box that you left on the Fiertia. It’s all there until Karol actually picks a proper home for Brave Vesperia. But coming back like this is nice, too...

...Once again, it’s hardly dawn, but you still drag yourself out. The streets give you the weirdest feeling that it’s some calm before the storm.

There’s no need to be discreet, but it would be much faster for you to round the castle building, and scale a wall until you reach a window. You signal for Repede to just go through the doors. Now, Estelle’s room was around the second floor… Or maybe the third, the interior inside is so weird-

“Yuri.” Right behind you. “Just use the entrance, for once.”

“Morning to you too, Flynn.” You flash a grin at him. As you look at him you notice his getup: White pants, and a turtleneck. Wait, what?

There’s an uncomfortable pause, like Flynn expected you to say more. “Yuri?”

Your eyes meet. “You surprised me.”

“I guess I did.” He crosses his arms, but he doesn’t sound convinced.

“Why the hell are you up so early.”

“I was taking a stroll.”

“Unarmored?”

Flynn’s stare moves down to the side of his hip. You follow his gaze, and notice his sword, still there. “Oh.”

“I know it’s weird to see me without my pauldrons, but that doesn’t mean I come unprepared for ambush.”

“No, you look weirdly unprepared now. And I don’t get how you’re here just on time to stop me from scaling this wall.”

“Let’s say I had a hunch.”

“Weirdo. What will the poor nobles think of the oh-so-unsightly way you look?”

“Whatever it is, it would be their last chance of seeing me for what I am; a Lower Quarter plebeian.” Flynn states plainly.

“No way, you’re a plebeian even if they make you wear gold. Don’t forget your roots.”

He laughs. “At least I won’t have to worry about you looking so fancy that you forget your own. But you do need to get a move on. If you want to even stay for the event, you actually need a crash course on what to expect, and Lady Estellise has been racking her head on what to say, and what to omit.”

“If you let me scale, she can even tell me about the origins of ordinations.”

“We all know you hardly care about the origins. You are not scaling this wall.” You swear he’s almost taking a battle stance against you.

“I changed my mind, you’ll actually be the shittiest Commandant up to date.” You say dryly, which prompts Flynn to chuckle. “I can’t wait until the revolution of Zaphias happens.”

“Sure, Yuri. And I’ll wait for you to come back to the knights with open arms.”

“No way in hell.” You cringe, and you take it as your signal to just go.

You take a few steps away from the wall. Flynn watches warily, before relaxing. “Yuri, I suppose I’ll be seeing-”

Then you rush and make a jump for the wall, latching onto the bricks! You barely see the surprised look on Flynn’s face!

“Yuri!”

“Yeah, catch you later, Commandant!” Despite the continued protests, you scale the wall.

You dust yourself off, just as you neatly close the window. Upon looking, you realise a maid was staring the entire time. “Just another morning in Zaphias castle, right?”

“...No, not really.”

“I guess not.”

You make your way to Estelle’s room, in front of which Repede is waiting for you, diligently. You wait a few minutes like this. Once Estelle finally emerges, you realise that it’s been a while since you’ve seen her actually look like a princess. Though, this get-up is definitely not as regal as the clothes she wore back when you first met. Only a few strands of her hair are tied back, and they probably meet at the back of her head with some ribbon. It’s just in her style.

She has to stop you from barging into her room, and instead drags you away to where you’d supposedly have to change in. The way all these hallways look similar has you doubt if Estelle didn’t take at least one wrong turn on your way. She insists she didn’t.

One look inside this dressing room tells you everything: it’s too empty and yet, too pompous. You swear that Flynn should be repurposing places like this first, before he goes around changing the use of his own quarters.

“Estelle, was there no room that was closer, at least?” You deadpan, staring at yourself in the comically large mirror.

“I had to ask a maid to tell me about here…”

You look very unimpressed, and she can probably tell. “If you look on the bright side of it, we can stay here, until it’s time, and then we can use the shortcut to get to the throne room faster.”

“Did a maid tell you about that too?”

“No, Flynn did! Actually, Yuri, maybe we can have him come over and-”

“Let’s not.”

She sinks a little. “Why?”

“...He’s probably busy.” Given he hasn’t chased after you this entire time. “Look, let’s just get this over with.”

Estelle leaves it at that, as much as she probably doesn’t want to. She walks over to the single chair in this room, right by the divider. You notice your designated clothes folded there. “Here,” she says and lifts some belt, “Let me at least tell you about all the pieces you’re about to wear.”

“You really did your homework, huh.”

She glows even more. “Of course! I was preparing for this! Tell me, do you care about wearing this belt that you can attach your sword to?”

It wounds up being a long morning.

From the lengthy explanations, you get that you have to stay in one place. You weren’t tasked to do anything important, like you dreaded. Flynn made too much of a big deal out of this.

“It’s almost like it wouldn’t matter if I’m not there.” You sit on the chair, arms folded, while Estelle brushes your hair. The bored expression that you see in your reflection should be enough to give you some award.

“That’s not true, Yuri!”

“I’m joking. I wouldn’t want to waste your effort, for one.”

“We are very happy to have you here.” She smiles just as you feel her make through another knot in your hair, before brushing upwards. “I know it’s taking a lot from you to be here, so we really appreciate it.” She then carefully ties your hair up in a ponytail, not letting any strand run loose. She looks over it a bit, and it doesn’t feel uncomfortable, surprisingly.

Estelle takes a step to your right, taking a look at you through the mirror, probably to read your expression. She points to the mirror with her brush still in hand, and asks a simple question.

“How do you find the uniform?”

That prompts you to stand from the chair, finally examining yourself. You fold your arms for a bit, to get a feel for the fabric, then kneel to pick up Second Star, in the same way you always do. You’re staring back at your reflection.

You take a good long moment to think about it.

...But you don’t think it’s in your style. It’s not quite the type of comfort you embrace, a tad bit too comfortable, a tad bit too regal. By tying your hair back and brushing your bangs neatly, you make for a perfect fake. A knight in the heart, a knight in fabric you probably never thought you would wear yourself. Estelle said she did her best not to make the clothes wrinkle after all this time, ever since you caught her trying to stuff them in your bags long ago. It’s not like you would care if she did.

And no matter how much you protest, you are invited. Even if you try to remind yourself about how much you don’t fit in, it’s very apparent that you’re wanted there for one reason or another, amongst all these nobles who scoffed at you back then. Would they even recognize you like this?

“It’s just about what I expected it to be.” You say as you look at Estelle, offering a smile in order to ease her nerves. “But we’ve been here for a while. Isn’t it about time for us to go?”

She glances at the windows for a second, then looks back and nods. “I don’t think even Flynn would recognize you instantly.”

“I would only hope so.” You briefly wonder if disguises would have worked back when you were still wanted by the knights. “Hey, Flynn and Ioder are going to be overdressed too, right?”

“Absolutely.” Estelle says, as she leads you out of the room.

Even though you hoped to blend in better when dressed like this, you suppose walking with Estelle and Repede down the hallway is still a sight. Not that you want to bother unpacking all of the other reasons you’re being stared at. At this point, you may as well make a show out of it, they can’t insult you in your face with much that you haven’t heard before.

You don’t even know most of the faces that you pass by. You swear you even caught a glimpse of Sodia and Applehead at some point, but by the time you think about it, you’ve already made your next turn.That must mean Flynn is somewhere near...

But now you’re finally here. The throne room. You remember the first time you were here, when Alexei had taken over the castle. It wasn’t the best first impression. But hey, at least it looks different now.

Someone pushes from your side, complaining about how you stopped right at the doors. Estelle takes your left to guide you away, but something on your hand distracts her from making more than a few steps. “Yuri, your blastia...?”

“I think a lot of people still keep theirs.” You tell her. As she stares at it, it seems to you that she can’t find the words to express what’s on her mind. It’s a weird pause, it makes you look down to see if something happened to your blastia. But you only see the core, dormant as it has been.

Your eyes move back to Estelle, and you realise she isn’t wearing hers. She hadn't worn it yesterday too.

“I’m sorry, Yuri, I thought I saw something.” Another pause settles between you two.

“Let’s just go before someone else pushes me.” You say.

..At least Estelle is standing next to you for the ordination. As you look around, you notice a few other people wearing similar outfits to yours, standing around you, it’s probably some swordsmen, who are given a special title thanks to the Empire’s favour. Noone here even knows you.

Soon enough, the ceremony starts abruptly, or so you think it does. There’s some guy who announces the beginning, and more people emerge to stand around by the throne itself. Some hold items like scrolls. You realise that amongst them is the Fake Dein Nomos. Did Estelle suggest using that instead of prying the real one out of Duke?

It dawns on you how this entire thing really is going to drag on for a while. While these people read from the scrolls, you offer a scratch to Repede, or mess with your bodhi blastia, to try pass the time.

Things eventually do pick up, by having Ioder’s name finally be called for. It’s only then you notice that Ioder and Flynn are standing at the top of the staircase, waiting. Ioder walks down.

To you, he really does look overdressed. You have to suppress a chuckle, but the best way you can describe his appearance is that of a very stereotypical ruler from some storybook. While all of this must have been tailored for his size, it makes Ioder look relatively small instead.

Beyond that, you don’t dwell on Ioder’s appearance, because your eyes look for Flynn, still waiting to be called for.

He looks so serious, that you’d mistake him for a statue. He’s wearing the thing Drake gave him months ago. It’s very… well, it’s different. Armor wraps around him where you would see blue. It’s not something you’re used to. It’s clear that this is purely ceremonial, but you feel like such armor would be a waste not to use against monsters who pierce their victims with teeth or claws. You could ask Flynn what he thinks about that idea. The headpiece offers some support on his face, but it’s probably about as useless as going against foes without any helmet.

There’s a detail over his heart that keeps your eye transfixed on Flynn, but then you notice his blue eyes looking bright in stark contrast--

“In place of Dein Nomos, we shall present you, Emperor Ioder, with a counterfeit left by the late Commandant Alexei.” Ioder expresses his thanks as he accepts the sword.

Your focus settles down on the scene at hand.

But you think he looked back at you.

Your eyes hurt from staring up for so long. You rub at them a little, to get the irritation to stop, and some guy on your right scoffs.

And then it’s Ioder’s turn to offer some smart words he probably spent weeks thinking about. He looks bright, not unlike some of the paintings of previous Emperors you passed by earlier. How long would it take until people insist on painting him too? He’s only eighteen.

You at least figure out when to clap. Ioder looks over to where you stand, and Estelle claps louder. Once the noise calms down, he speaks again.

“I, Emperor Ioder Argylos Heurassein, call forth Captain Flynn Scifo.”

But the silence continues.

You look up, and see that Flynn is still. You can’t make out his facial expression. You hear murmurs.

You start to move, and Estelle grabs your arm. “No, Yuri!” She barely keeps her voice low.

You look at her. “Something’s not right.”

“Yes, so what of it?” Someone behind you speaks out. “That would be an example of the Emperor’s errors in choosing someone incompetent enough to mess up their own ceremony. Are you trying to instigate something?”

“Hey, you-” You try to move, but can’t, because Estelle holds on to you tightly.

Though the frustration bubbles in you, you hold your tongue. In the blur of it all, Ioder says something, but you don’t hear it. Iit passes through you, really. You focus your gaze on Flynn’s figure again, who has begun moving, suddenly. Was it in reaction to your commotion? Well, at least the whispers have stopped.

As Flynn goes down the stairs, it’s as if nothing went wrong in the first place. Eventually, you can see the face he’s making; it’s like he’s about to face off another serious foe. Something about it is very endearing, but you still can’t shake the feeling off that something’s wrong.

Before you know it, he is now facing Ioder, and bows. “I am here to serve.”

Further talking ensues, but you’re not paying attention. Every so often, Flynn offers a “Yes.”, as he is promising to do his duties. Protecting the people, commanding the knights. You’re suddenly reminded of the ten-year-old, who talked your ear off about how amazing the knights are. And from today, he will be the one to make them into something more than childish praise.

“Flynn Scifo, you are bestowed the position of Commandant of the knights, officially.”

“This is the highest form of honor, Emperor Ioder.” Flynn bows once more.

He faces the crowd of spectators, looking determined. He looks upon all spectators, and the scroll reader says something else. Flynn locks eyes with you, and this is when you nearly miss the round of applause.

Ioder speaks up again. “Now, everyone, we officially announce the celebrations of this glorious day. Please feel free to explore any location in the castle, so long its doors are open. Our staff is more than happy to assist you. As for the complimentary meals, they are in the gardens. I offer my warmest regards to Princess Estellise, who worked very hard to make this all possible.” Another round of applause happens. Estelle is very embarrassed over the sudden attention.

Though you would have initially taken it as your moment to leave, you instead walk forward. You take off so fast, that Estelle almost misses to follow right by you. There’s so many people, but you need to talk to him.

You finally reach him, and of course he doesn’t look like someone who had nearly flunked his own ordination. “Lady Estellise, Yuri.” He says, and somehow he’s still able to smile.

“Hey, Flynn, what was with that?”

Estelle instantly interjects. “Yuri, now is really not the time!” She’s right, but then...

“Can we go somewhere, to talk?” You stare at Flynn like something is about to happen, like an enemy is about to emerge and strike.

Flynn must be overwhelmed just by how suddenly all this is happening. He turns his head behind him, toward the door of the sword stair, and then looks back at you. He has his answer.

But before he can even say anything, someone else comes in to announce themselves.

“Flynn Scifo, my congratulations.” That’s when you finally see a pair of nobles, finally at Flynn’s side. “We are truly regretful, but we didn’t want the princess and... this person, to just whisk you away for the entire day! Everyone’s dying to talk to you.”

“Yes, my apologies…” Flynn bows.

He looks a bit helpless, so you decide to help him out. “Just go,” You say, surprising both him and Estelle. “We can talk later. Enjoy the party.” You start walking, or maybe it’s Flynn who is getting pulled away.

“Yuri, I’m sorry.” Estelle says, apologetic. “I suppose that was the price for him not being here yesterday.”

“Not much that can be helped with. Let’s just pass the time for now.”

The day ends up long, agonizingly so. As you pass through the hallways, Estelle notes how there are more people present here, not just the ones who were at the ceremony. The newcomers would be the type to be here to look good, you imagine.

Whenever Estelle herself would get pulled aside for conversations of her own, you had the bad luck to exchange insults with a few nobles, who recognized you through your disguise. While they do their best to get under your skin, with things ranging from your origin to your ties to Flynn, you don’t retaliate. Ideally, you wanted to, but after your stunts earlier, you want all this to end sooner.

You couldn’t shake off wanting to see Flynn again, anyway. You know he’s barely managing the day, and the way he did not move earlier kept replaying in your mind, no matter how much you tried not to think about it.

You wonder if you should have pushed harder to talk in private as soon as the ceremony ended, but a voice in you reprimands you for even entertaining such a thought.

In the tail end of the afternoon, you and Estelle make it to the gardens, to grab a bite of some of the efforts from the castle cooks.

“At least this is the only big event I’ll ever have to attend.”

Estelle looks at you curiously. “What about any other big occasion in the future?”

“We’ll get there when those happen. Let me have this for now.” You take a bite out of this amazing pudding cup, and Estelle chuckles.

“I did not think I would need to seek you out again, Yuri Lowell.” Someone suddenly says. You know exactly who this voice belongs to. You open your eyes to peer at her.

“Hey. Did I do something again?”

Sodia pinches the bridge of her nose. “No. Just listen for once. I came here to ask why you haven’t approached the Cap-” she corrects herself, “the Commandant. Are you avoiding him again?”

“Does it look like I am? I’m just waiting for my turn, until he can talk to me.” You don’t want to tell her it would take you one rash decision to go look for him. A question comes to mind, instead. “Did he send you after me himself?”

“No, he did not. But he would mention you whenever I could exchange words with him.” She crosses her arms, very clearly displeased. “Just go find him. You typically always distract him enough to make time for you.”

Flynn’s problem is exactly that he always makes time for you.

You munch on another spoonful of pudding.

“I hope you at least consider what I had to say. Princess Estellise,” she bows to Estelle, “I hope you have a splendid evening.” Estelle offers her a thanks, and Sodia exits the gardens nearly as quickly as she came.

Estelle breaks the silence that was threatening to settle. “Yuri, she is right. You’re leaving tomorrow.”

“You make it sound like I am actively avoiding him.” You rise from where you were sitting. You set the finished pudding aside. “But fine, I’ll get going now. I should at least let him make fun of my get-up.”

You look at her pointedly, and she almost misses the beat to respond. “Oh, don’t worry about leaving me here! See, what if Repede stayed with me?”

You turn to Repede, questioning him on this sudden decision. But he surprises you by walking over to Estelle, staying closer than usual to her. Estelle didn’t expect this herself, because she looks like she’s about to tear up from joy.

“Then I’ll go. I know where he might be.” You get up, and you make an exit from the gardens. You turn back to Estelle, to offer a final wave to her.

It’s still full of people around, but it at least makes you look less suspicious than what you seem. You hope Flynn bothered to eat something today, if he ever made his way to the gardens in the first place.

While wandering, you pass by one of the dining halls at some point. You peek in, just in case.. But you don’t linger for more than a few seconds. You swear you caught a glimpse of Harry and the old man, drinking there, but you have no reason to idle time away any longer than you have.

The throne room by now is nearly entirely vacant. That doesn’t concern you, as  you see that the doors to the Sword stair are open.

The breeze is gentle, even at the top of the capital. The sky is dyed orange, illuminating everything golden. You didn’t realise the sun began setting. Below you, everything is lively, still bustling in its festive activities.

Not that you can hear anything. Only your footsteps break what is otherwise a perfect silence. By the time you reach Flynn, you see him sitting, observing Zaphias. You almost don’t recognize him.

“Hey, did I keep you waiting?”

Flynn spares you a glance. “Yuri…”

He gestures for you to come over, and you comply. You sit next to him. There’s a silence, as you both watch the sky gradually change colors. The gold becomes pink, soon enough.

“Part of me didn’t think I’d see you today.” Flynn says suddenly.

You glance at Flynn’s direction. “Was I not supposed to show up?”

Flynn’s gaze is still fixed at the clouds, which have begun losing their puffy whiteness, letting colors wash over them. The way he’s been sitting isn’t what you’ve come accustomed to, it’s very casual. You look at his legs, nearly entirely wrapped in white armor and black pants.

“I had my own assumptions. Especially after yesterday.” He pauses for a moment, to take a good look at you again. “But you were at the ceremony.” And you are here now. “I want to thank you for coming.”

You’re searching for something in his eyes, but you alone can’t put a name on it.

Thank you for coming. For me.

But he doesn’t say that. Why do you think he would?

You notice how Flynn’s left fist unclenches. Even in the presence of such a view, he still can’t relax. Not that you can blame him, given that you’re pretty sure that “I’m the source of your problems.”

“Now you’re spouting nonsense, you know.” His tone sounds anything but harsh.

“Then was being frozen at the ceremony related to whatever you’re not telling me?”

Before you know it, Flynn’s entirely looked away again, uneasy. Uncomfortable, almost. His eyes reflect the sunset in such a way, that words fail you instantly. You look back to the sky too, letting out another exhale.

Eventually, Flynn starts again. “Seeing you at the ceremony made me very relieved. You even went through all the hassle to look so…”

“Fancy?”

“Maybe that’s not the word for it.” He smiles. “And no, I’m not going to scold you about the stunt you almost tried then.”

“You still bothered to mention it.” You don’t mean to sound bitter, but Flynn still laughs in response. Though, he sounds melancholic.

“I know at least some things won’t change.” He says, quieter. He looks down again, you can tell that he’s trying to push some thoughts deep down, never to come out.

But you don’t want to let him wallow in this any further. There’s been an underlying thing all along, that even you failed to notice. If you leave it for when you can talk to Flynn again, putting off important conversations, and instead keep up whatever narrative your lettered correspondences paint, will he ever be able to say anything?

“Flynn. Mind showing me your new room?”

He agrees to it. Probably because he realised he can’t back out now. Or maybe Sodia was right, and he was waiting all day for you to ask him. Regardless, he offers his hand to yours, and he does not let go of it for the entire way to his room. You don’t make the effort to pull it away, either.

You reach the hallway Estelle told you about, and you’re not surprised that there are no guards here.

“I thought the Commandant’s room would have some security here?”

Flynn’s hand is on the door’s handle. He says it so softly, you almost miss it. “I dismissed them, when I was officially appointed to this room.”

And then, the door is open.

You take it all in.

Somehow, you expected something much more refined. Maybe it was before, but Flynn and Estelle tried to make something out of the otherwise barren state of this room. You can pick out where Estelle intervened, design-wise.

But the first thing you really take note of is the bed itself. You walk over to it, and it doesn’t look any smaller up close. It’s probably the only one that you (and Flynn) would ever see in your lives. How would it feel to sleep on a bed you can’t fill on your own?

You turn to the right side of the room. It seems to have been repurposed to function as Flynn’s personal office. There’s a bookcase here, presumably with everything he would need to do his work. That would spare most visits to any of the libraries, probably.

Turn your head the opposite direction, and you see shelves that hold personal belongings. You recognize a few things from back when you were kids. At the same time, all these items barely take up any space, and most of the shelves have yet to serve their purpose here.

Instead of approaching the few shelves that hold any memories, you make your way to the desk. Clean, spotless. No paperwork out of place.

“How does it feel here?”

“It feels like a Commandant’s bedroom should feel, I think.” If Flynn actually worked on making this room as personal as he could, then he instead made this section of the castle look very unwelcome, and lacking in life.

Your hand glides over the surface of the table. Even the very sensation of it against your fingertips tells you it’s the expensive kind of woodwork.

You look at Flynn.

“I was very happy, when I could travel with you all,” he suddenly admits. “Looking back to those times made me remember that I lack the capability to travel. Not like I used to.”

“It’s not like you are always going to be here. There will be times when you’d need to personally get involved.” Though you recount that Alexei himself did not travel as often either. “And hey, who said you need to stay here all the time?” Especially given that it looks so lonely.

“I can just send other knights to do what I used to do. Or at least, that’s what the council says.” Yesterday’s conversations resurface, but you wait for Flynn to gather his thoughts. “Recently, Raven visited me. He wanted to give me a warning.”

“About what, the council?”

“He saw first-hand how much Alexei was struggling with doing anything. Raven told me about the actions Alexei resorted to doing, out of others’ sights. Because otherwise, the council would...”

You instantly notice how frigid Flynn’s getting. “Hey, come on, didn’t you tell me once that you’re willing to endure their stubbornness? You told me it’s fine.”

“I know what I said! I just…”

“You have the allies needed to help you. You are not fighting on your own. And you do have the authority to oppose them now. Isn’t that enough?”

“No, it’s not. You know that yourself, Yuri.” Flynn steps closer to you, and there’s a certain glint in his eyes that you swear you last saw years ago. “We came to the knights to invoke change, but I didn’t think…”

You grab Flynn’s shoulders. “Didn’t think what?”

He pushes your hands away, and walks toward the window, the one by the shelves.

You find yourself impatient, again. “Don’t tell me you’re listening to what some older people say about you. You’re not going to become like Alexei.”

Flynn continues staring out the window.

You speak louder, to try to get his attention. “If you believe in the people who put their trust in you, then you won’t die without accomplishing nothing.”

“But if I die, no one else can take on the Commandant position like I have, right?”

“What?”

“That’s what you mean, right?” He turns around, and it just now dawns on you just how exhausted Flynn looks.

From the window, you notice that the sun has set.

And Flynn continues, barely containing his voice. You both know no one would hear him here. "I can’t even protect those who matter to me. I can’t exert myself to my limits, I can’t take injuries, even if it’s for the ones I want to protect. Am I expected to just let everything happen by me?”

“Do you even hear what you’re saying? Is this just a fucked up way to tell me that you want to die?!” You don’t realise when you started moving toward Flynn, but soon enough, you’re facing him directly. You’re withholding the urge to grab him again.

“I’m saying that I’m just me, Yuri! I don’t want to be the Commandant behind the desk, overseeing everything! I… I’m not an untouchable beacon. And I’m not a hero to die for.”

Protest rises from deep within you. “Then why do you act like you’re going to barricade yourself here come tomorrow?”

“Because I want to at least work hard enough, to make up for the praise I know I don’t deserve. That I took what was meant for you and Brave Vesperia is already too much for me. You alone said that it doesn’t matter who does good for the people. And I wish it didn’t matter to me, because I just want to do what I can for everyone’s sake.”

Before you can respond, Flynn breathes in, and continues.

“But a lot of people began insisting that my place is not on the battlefield, that I shouldn’t chase some blastia thieves, or personally oversee whether everyone outside Zaphias has housing. That I’ve done enough already, that I don’t need to focus on things a knight should be doing to begin with!”

Flynn rubs at his face, and the gloves seem to irritate him more than help him calm down. He exhales harsher.

“And I miss traveling, Yuri, I miss doing what I have grown accustomed to doing. That’s part of my oath as a knight.” You feel as if Flynn is trying to laugh here, but laughter itself doesn’t come. “Maybe there’s something childish lodged deep inside. I don’t even understand it myself.”

You find yourself grasping to understand.

“I’m regarded as a hero, when I know I am not one. The most of what I’ve done the past few months, is argue with people who think the most vile things about the civilians I swore to protect. But I can’t even protect them directly now. No, I never could.”

He places his hand over his chest. There, his own dormant blastia remains. You look at Flynn’s hand. You can sense the blood trickling down your left.

“Yesterday, I could heal you. I felt like I was doing something for someone, and seeing the result with my own eyes!” The grip over his chest tightens. “But then you said that the empire needs me. Because my purpose lies in whether or not I’m useful enough. And I know that by holding the thoughts I have now that I...”

His shoulders shake, and that is when the weight Flynn Scifo has been holding on his shoulders begins crashing down.

It feels as if some of the weight itself is stuck in your throat, not allowing you to say a word. You’re frozen still, when Flynn, The Commandant, is completely open to any attack. You want to move your hands.

You want him to stop saying things.

“I invited you to come today, because I wanted to see you.” He makes a sound, and dread clutches your pounding heart. “I wanted to see you, to know that I’m not alone. I… I wasn’t even conscious of it.” You can’t bear that he’s still looking at you so softly.

You know you cannot comfort him.

“Yesterday, I thought we were together like old friends, just you and I, Yuri. Not as a Commandant and a civilian.”

“Flynn…” Your hand threatens to move.

“I want to be myself. I need to feel like I’m still me...”

You catch him, before his knees hit the floor. And he holds on to you as he cries, because he needs you.

...

You don’t keep track of time passing. The room eventually is submerged in darkness, all illuminated only by the moonlight through the window. That’s when you take Flynn’s hand, and guide him from the floor to the bed. You help him rid of all the armor on him, but it’s mostly Flynn taking it off, really.

And all that hides under it… is Flynn himself. The same Flynn you saw this morning.

“I bet you can at least breathe for once.” You remark. Flynn chuckles softly.

You try to send him to the bathroom (whose door you didn’t even notice earlier), so he can change into sleepwear. But before Flynn leaves, he walks to the wardrobe instead, and opens it.

“I don’t want to force you to stay.” He sounds hoarse after all the crying, but that doesn’t stop him from talking. “But I know that it’s too late to find Lady Estellise, in order to get your usual clothes back. You’re free to borrow something for tonight, and return it to me later.”

“Sharing things like the old times, huh? You don’t need to be so serious about that.” At least saying that provokes Flynn to smile.

“Still, I wouldn’t know when I’ll see you again. You leave tomorrow-”

“I’m here now. Do you want me to stay here tonight?”

The question surprises him. But maybe deep down, he was hoping to hear it.

You watch him drift off to sleep. You know that you cannot comfort him, but the warmth and clamminess of his hand in yours makes you believe that just being here is enough.

[percywinchester27]

About a boy (Part-11)

Word count: 2.8K

Warning: Suspense, feels, physical abuse, child-trafficking, kidnapping, child-violence, bullying.

Characters: Dean, Cas, Gabriel, Benny, Michael, OCs and… Sam?

Summary: Dean Winchester has a secret. A secret that could really land him in trouble. He never expected to connect with anyone when he walked into the ‘Blue Stone Orphanage for Boys,’ but even then, the walls he has put up are slowly coming down. Now, a series of strange events are threatening to expose him. When everything starts falling apart around him, will he still be able to save the one person that matters the most?

A/N: Okay, I really hope you all like this chapter! <3

Thanks to my lovelies @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​​​​​​​ and @deanssweetheart23​​​​​​​ for beta reading this story <3

About a boy masterlist

“You know what would help? Lightsabers!” Will proclaimed.

Dean laughed and Cas gave Will an amused look.

“You guys think it’s funny, but we sneaked a Star Wars tape last year- you remember that, don’t you, Cas?- and those sabers could light up the whole place,” he reasoned.

“You know Lightsabers aren’t real,” Cas said patiently.

Will rolled his eyes at that. “Of course they aren’t real. I know that! But they must be using something similar during the filming. That’s what we need. We could light this whole place up. No need for dumb flashlights that give out in the middle of creepy staircases.”

Dean smiled indulgently. “That was one time.”

“And one time was enough,” Will said decidedly, his tone effectively dismissing the matter.

It sure had been a struggle, sneaking each night into the record room without letting anyone know. Even more, it was a task to smuggle and return Will from and back to the 4th floor. But if Dean was honest, Will kept them going. He had the sort of brightness and enthusiasm that never gave out… even on the dullest of nights.

It had taken Will a few days to come back to himself, but after that, Will was the driving force behind the ‘Sam search mission.’ In fact, he seemed too bright sometimes. Dean worried if somehow Will was overcompensating, thinking that it was his job to find Sam before he left with his adoptive parents at the end of the month. That was another thing- No one was to bring the adoption up. Dean wasn’t sure it was denial. It appeared more like Will was pushing it deep, deep down. His anxieties only surfaced sometimes in the dark when it was just him and Dean, with their backs to the grill. He would suddenly go quiet and Dean would just know.

“Found another!” Cas announced. “Matt Wilcox. It says he was transferred to Missouri, but no paperwork to prove it.”

“We have twenty-three now,” Dean said, grimly.

They hadn’t found many leads on Sam. Will had suggested that they go by the law of omissions. Eliminate those files that had no chance of being Sam’s. Like all kids who hadn’t been admitted around the age of 6 months, or whose physical descriptions were way off. It was time consuming, but it was still something. Meanwhile, Dean used the same idea to look into Stynes. In the past three weeks since Dean had actually started investigating the matter seriously, they had come across multiple instances of paperwork that wasn’t just shoddy but didn’t make any sense. Most of these were kids who had been abruptly displaced. Dean didn’t know if bad paperwork or a complete lack of follow-up would be good enough for Jody to make a case out of it, but if they found enough files, maybe some other link could be found.

It was serious work, and Will’s periodic complaints about the lack of good flashlights- which had become an essential commodity at this point- was the only entertainment.

Dean stashed his files away and checked his watch. It was just past 4 am.

“We should get back,” he suggested. “You don’t want to fall asleep in the class again, Cas.”

“It’s what the English Lit class is meant for,” said Cas, getting up anyway and stretching his arms. Beside him, Will nodded in agreement.

Dean smiled fondly at him. 

Quietly, they made their way back to the left wing under the light of a single flashlight. It was little help, but too much light could attract attention. It was vexing to crossover from the barren left wing each night, but it was much better than risking being sighted.

Just as they landed on the fourth floor, a weird creaking noise came from the further left part.

“What the hell?” Dean scowled, pointing the flashlight. There was nothing there. Acting on an instinct, he shut the light off completely, gesturing with his hands for his other companions to stay put. 

As if on point, a dark figure emerged at the very end of the corridor. Dean’s breath hitched; behind him, there were similar gasps of shock. 

“Shhh…” he said, pushing them back into a deeper corner. The figure at the end was well-built and tall, and was looking straight at them in the darkness, as if suspecting their presence. After a few moments that stretched too long, the figure disappeared into the hallway ahead. 

They stayed put like that afterwards for what seemed like ages just to make sure that they weren’t caught; then at Dean’s signal, took another flight of stairs and reached the 5th floor, opening the door and crossing over to the dorm side of the building.

Cas sagged against the rusted iron door, with his hand over his chest. “What. The. Hell was that?” he gasped, breathing heavily. Will was looking wide eyed, completely silently now, waiting for Dean to answer the question.

“I don’t know,” Dean finally said. “Whoever it was, wasn’t scared of being found, that’s for sure.”

“You’re thinking what I’m thinking?” Cas asked, brow sweaty and furrowed. Both Dean and Will nodded.

Neither of them said it out loud, but if whoever it was didn’t care about being spotted, it was because they thought they had the upper hand. Almost like… they owned the place. 

The Stynes.

“Tomorrow,” Dean said. “We find out what the hell is happening there tomorrow.”

*****************************************

All through the day Dean couldn’t concentrate. It didn’t help that Cas kept falling asleep in every class. Maybe it was the complacency from staying in a place as dangerous as the bellstone orphanage for so long, but Cas was taking their impending adventure in stride. He was behaving ordinarily. In fact , he had even prayed like he usually did in the morning. 

Cas’s calm energy gradually caught up with Dean and by the time they got back from school, his nervousness was almost ebbed. It was ticking in the back of his mind that Will and Barry hadn’t joined up with them after school as they usually did, but he didn’t pay much heed to it. Lately, the school was conducting weird psych analysis on Will to determine if he was all set for the adoption and subsequently the move to New York. 

Dean couldn’t think about it without feeling a punch to his gut, so he pushed the thought out of his head.

“Hey,” Cas whispered as they reached the entrance of the boys home. “I’m going to go see if I can pick some more flashlights out of Garth’s supply closet. Meet you in the dorm room later?”

“Alright.”

They had put their heads together and deduced that there was no way Garth was involved in any of the stuff going around here. As Dean made his way to the shower room, he thought to himself that it may very well be possible that Garth was completely unaware. He lived down in the town, a good five miles away from the orphanage, and rode on his decrepit motorcycle every alternate day to do the essential maintenance or janitorial stuff that boys in the home couldn’t take care of. On occasions, he had stayed over late, but it was plausible that he didn’t know that there was something sinister going on here. Besides, anyone who had met Garth knew him to be absentminded. Good, but lost in his own tune.

Somehow the thought was uplifting for Dean. Not everyone in the staff was horrible. He hadn’t given the cook and the two henchmen like dudes that seemed to hang around with Andy the benefit of the doubt yet.

The shower did its work and Dean felt alert as he made his way back to the dorm room. As he reached the 5th floor main corridor, he saw Will.

Will was white. His forehead was clammy with sweat and his eyes were wide in horror.

Every thought abandoned Dean except for a nameless alarm over Will’s horror. Was he hurt? 

Before Dean could utter another word, Will came barreling forward, almost tripping over his own shoes.

“Dean!” Will said, the name falling out of his lips like both a call for help and a prayer of relief.

“What happened?” Dean asked dreading the reply

Tears Swam in Will’s eyes. Tears of helplessness and fear. “They took him, Dean,” he sobbed. “They took Barry.”

With that, he collapsed on the floor, his knees completely giving out beneath him.

Dean rushed to him, falling on his own knees. “Barry?”

Will’s lips were quivering, but his voice was surprisingly strong. “I saw him at school in the morning, but he said he was feeling sick, so they let him go early. I-I just had a bad feeling about this so I skipped the class and came back here, but Barry was just gone.”

“Hey, maybe he’s just hanging around somewhere,” Dean tried to rationalise. “Maybe he went into town instead. It’s just 6 in the evening. You don’t know that he’s decided to play hooky and be somewhere else.”

“No-no,” Will shook his head. “Barry isn’t like that. You know him! I’m his only friend and he always sticks by me. Besides, I asked this other kid who had stayed back from school today, and he said Barry had definitely come back.”

“We need to ask Andy,” Dean said. “He’ll-...”

“I asked already!” Will cried. “He said Barry was transferred.”

Shit!

“I- I,” Will said, looking around wildly. “We need to go to the left wing. I know that’s where they are keeping him. They have to be!”

Dean didn’t think it was possible to be more horrified… but somehow he did.

“Will!” Dean shook his friend by the shoulders to get him to snap out of it. “Listen to me! We will find Barry. We will go there tonight and bring him back, okay?”

Will’s eyes stilled, the black pupils were so dark they overpowered the hazel around it.

“You promise?” 

Dean cursed internally, but outside, he said, “I promise.”

So fast that Dean didn’t have time to react, Will flung his arms around Dean’s middle and hugged him hard. Dean’s own hand instinctively came to rest over Will’s head, his fingers weaving into the soft brown. He could feel Will’s sobs wracking his own body, the tears staining his shirt, but Dean held on, tightening his grip on the boy, as if by sheer willpower he could fix everything that was wrong.

A part of him did not want to let go. Something deep inside was just screaming at Dean to hold on to Will and make a run for it. Leave everything behind to just protect this kid. But there were lives at stake here. He could picture Barry’s crying face when that bully at school had raised his arm at him, then the absolute faithfulness with which he looked at Will. 

Dean ran his hand over Will’s shoulders, over and over till his heaves subsided.

He moved back ever so lightly to look Will in his tear stained, anguished eyes. “You listen to me now, Will. Go back to your room and wait for us to signal you at night, okay?”

Will nodded,with implicit trust in his eyes and Dean wanted to kick himself for lying.

**********************************************

Dean sprinted all the way back from Will’s room, after having walked him down there, and skidded to a halt in his dorm room, almost banging into Benny. He let out a yelp of surprise at the intrusion but then gave Dean a brief, hesitant smile. Benny had been trying to be nice after his blow out almost a month ago. Sometimes Dean could see he was struggling to say the words, to make it okay, but hadn’t been able to.

Today, he actually tried. “Hey, Dean-,” he started to say but Dean cut it off quickly.

“Where’s Cas?”

“He’s not back yet.”

Dean turned around and kicked the foot of his bed. “Damn it!” he yelled.

“Dean!”

Behind him, Cas had just entered the room, slightly sweaty and breathless, two flashlights clutched to his chest. 

“Barry-” 

“I know!” Cas said, forehead crumpling. “A couple of kids were talking about it.”

Dean gave another frustrated yell.

“What? What happened?” Benny asked, vigilant now, all awkwardness gone.

Hurriedly, in a low voice, Dean repeated everything that had happened with Will. When he was done, both Cas’s and Benny’s faces were identical masks of horror.

“We have to go to the west wing, Dean!” Cas said decidedly, his voice grim.

“Yes,” Benny agreed. 

Dean sank down on his bed with a thud. “You can’t come with us, Benny.”

“What? Why-” Benny started to protest but Dean cut him off. Again.

“You can’t come with us, because I want you here, standing by the door, making sure no one knows or follows us.”

“I don’t see the need,” Benny reasoned. “No one will be up at night.”

Dean exhaled, slowly. “We are not going to wait for nightfall. We’re doing it now, in an hour.”

“But Will? You just said that you promised him we’ll go after the lights go out...” Cas trailed off.

“This is because of Will,” Dean said through his teeth. “I lied to him. He’s just a kid. Sneaking into the record room at night is one thing, but dragging him into this? When even I don’t know what’s waiting there? I can’t do it. Better for him to be angry with me tomorrow than risk his life. Besides, he is in no shape to go anywhere. He’s scared out of his mind for Barry.”

Dean knew everything he was saying made sense, but the real reason behind lying to Will was that Dean knew he'd be himself paralysed with fear for Will, if he was to go anywhere near whatever crap was happening in the west wing. The mere thought of Will being in danger made Dean’s knees give out.

“In fact, Cas,” Dean said slowly, “I can’t ask you to risk your life for this either.”

“Oh, shut up, Dean!” Cas sais, exasperated. “How old do you think I am? 12? I can make my own decisions and I’m coming with you.”

Dean felt his body loosen slightly with relief. While thinking of Will in a dangerous situation filled him with dread, knowing that Cas was going to be with him, made him feel relieved. Friendship was unpredictable like that… you couldn’t guess how it would make you feel.

“Alright, then,” Dean said, “This is how we do it.”

**********************************************

It was as dark as it always was in the west wing, despite it being just over 7 o clock, and the lights in the compound still on. Both Dean and Cas had their flashlights throwing lights into the far end of the corridor as they made their way through the stinking, grimy passageway. Benny had deftly taken his place next to the door, without any hesitation. Dean had handed him the set of keys and decided on a certain knocking rhythm so he would know it was them when they returned and opened the door for them. The door opened easily from the outside, and unlike the long nights, today Dean didn’t have the luxury of trying all the keys in the dark till the right one fit.

With precise coordination that only came after weeks and weeks of sneaking around in dark decrepit places, Dean and Cas moved along the decaying wall towards the end of the corridor. From what Dean knew of the building footprint, having extensively inspected the form from the outside, the corridor should lead into something of a hallway. Even as they rounded the corner, a sense of foreboding gripped Dean. In all of their nightly excursions, they had never ventured this far into the west wing. The hallway opened up into another short corridor that swiftly made a left turn, blocking all view.

Dean quickly exchanged a look with Cas, confirming that they both agreed upon continuing further ahead. The swift left turn wasn’t in fact a turn, but a narrow, crooked staircase. What was more? There was light emanating from the bottom of the stairwell. It was dim and threatening, but there was definitely something going on there. With another cautious look, Dean started descending the staircase, now switching off the flashlight. Behind him, Cas did the same. Together they climbed down, clutching the wall for support.

The staircase led all the way down till what would be the first floor. The passageway ahead was lit with less wattage bulbs emitting a dull reddish light. It was menacing. The floor itself was like the dormitory wing he slept in. Rooms on one side, next to each other, all connected by a single, small passage. But unlike the dorm, the wall opposite the rooms didn’t have a line of windows; it was blank and solid. 

Suddenly there was a banging noise. Without thinking, Dean dashed ahead, passing small rooms with grilled iron doors. His peripheral vision caught something and he came to a skittering halt.

One of the rooms was unlocked and the rusted, the metal door swaying off his hinges. Inside, hanging from the ceiling were long chains that ended in shackles. What was worse? There were dark splashes on the wall- dark brown in colour- of what suspiciously looked like blood.

Dean’s stomach turned and he looked away. If there had been anything in his stomach, it would have come out now.

“Is that… is that…” Cas was too disgusted to even complete the sentence.

The banging echoed again and Dean rushed towards the door it was coming from. That particular room was in darkness as the light within had been turned off. However, there was movement in the shadowed corner.

“Dean?”

The voice was muted and hopeless… but it was definitely Barry’s.

Dean banged against the door. “Barry! Oh thank God you’re okay.”

But he had said it too quickly. For Barry’s small figure dragged its way across the small room towards the door, and in the little light reflecting from the bulbs above, Dean could see the dark wetness of blood against his face. Barry’s spectacles weren’t on him, and his leg was twisted in a way that was anything but natural.

“My God,” Cas whispered, and fell against the grill, trying to shove his hand between the rod to get to him. “Barry!”

Barry broke down completely. His face was bloodied and bruised but the most horrifying thing was the hopelessness in Barry’s eyes. He had given up.

“Barry!” Dean reached out so the tips of his fingers touched Barry’s brown hair. “I’m gonna get you out of here.”

Barry just shook his head. “They’re coming for me, Dean. I heard them, the car is right outside,” he cried, in a dead voice. “You can’t help me.”

“I’m not giving up, Damn it!” Dean said fiercely. “I’m going to get out of here and inform the police. I have a pager stashed under my clothes. They’ll free you.”

They had to free him.

“Cas,” Dean said, “Stay here and raise a riot if you see any movement or hear anything, okay? I’m gonna head up and contact Jody.”

Cas’s chin jerked up in quick acknowledgement and he shuffled closer to the grill.

Dean turned to Barry, his eyes stinging at the corners. “You hold on, Barry. Cas is right here with you. I’ll be back in a moment.” 

At long last, Barry nodded, a small light of hope in his pained eyes. With one last look, Dean bolted back towards the hallway, and up through the staircase. Nothing seemed real to him anymore. He banged three times as they had decided, and within seconds the door opened. Dean stumbled out and onto the floor.

Benny was next to him in a flash. Maybe it was the look on Dean’s face or Cas’s absence, but Benny stiffened. 

“I- I need to get to the pager,” Dean heaved breathlessly.

Benny didn’t ask for an explanation or even what had happened. He moved quickly and helped Dean to his feet which were starting to feel like the bones were beginning to melt. Somehow, Dean managed to stand straight and reach his room. Once there, he hauled his duffel bag from under the bed and yanked the zipper, frantically digging into the base of the bag to find the rolled up wad of socks in which he had hid the pager.

Soon, his hand wrapped around the small plastic object and he pulled it free of the clothes. He hurriedly turned it on. It seemed like an eternity before the pager beeped to life and the small line blinked on. With shaking hands Dean typed-

EMERGENCY. COME NOW.

He hit send and the pager tumbled out of his shivering hands. It would take Jody at least an hour and a half to get here. And Barry had said that the car was already here to take him. Till then Dean had to do all he could stall them. 

“Get a grip!” Benny said, laying a hand on Dean’s shoulder. His voice was gruff, but kind. Dean felt a welling gratefulness towards Benny.

“Benny,” Dean said, getting to his feet. “We have to hurry, but there is one more thing I have to do.”

“What?”

“Hide Will here!”

There was a sick feeling in his stomach that refused to go away, and it only multiplied whenever he thought of Will. “I’m going down to fetch him, and then we’ll lock him in our room. I know it sounds stupid but I just… I…”

“You don’t need to explain, brother,” Benny said. “I understand how you feel. I would have done the same for Jaime. I’ll go find Castiel in the west wing, you find Will.”

Dean quickly explained the location of Cas and Barry, and then Dean was running again. It was dinner time so he rushed to the dinning hall first, but in all the crowd, he couldn’t spot Will’s particular mop of brown hair. With rising alarm he looked in the library, the game room, even the godforsaken record room, but his friend wasn’t to be found anywhere. Finally, almost on the verge of nausea, Dean reached Will’s room. His sandy haired roommate was sitting on the bunk bed, shuffling through laundry clothes.

“Will?” Dean asked, throat parched. “Where’s Will?”

The kid gave Dean an odd look. “He’s not here,” he said. “Left with Andy a while ago.”

The blood in  Dean’s veins seemed to go cold.

“Andy?”

“Yeah,” the kid shrugged. “Andy said his adoptive parents were here for him, for some urgent formality. That their car was waiting outside. Will wanted to say goodbye to you, but Andy said he could say it when he came back.”

The car was waiting outside.

Blood thundered in Dean’s ears, and without his mind directing, his body moved, taking him upstairs in a desperate numbness. 

Outside, his body collided with Cas’s. 

Castiel was crying. There was a thin stream of blood trickling down the side of his face, along his ear and neck.

“Barry is gone,” he said, voice completely hollow. “I was waiting there, but something hit me hard on the head and I clocked out. When I came to, Benny was standing over me and Barry w- was... gone.

From the grounds, there was a sharp sound of an engine revving, and all three of them turned to watch through the north windows as two cars drove away from the fence… their tail lights becoming pinpoints as they disappeared into the night.

*******************************

A/N 2: Man, I am soooo sorry for the cliffy! If it helps, the next chapter is written. I’ll post it within the week! 

Please do tell me what you thought of the chapter? I live for comments!

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[capricornus-rex]

Two Sides of the Coin (14)

Chapter 14: First Conscious Moments | Jidné Sheedra x Cal Kestis

Summary: Hell-bent on exacting revenge and retrieving the Holocron, the dreaded Darth Vader is now on the hunt for the young Jedi Knight, Cal Kestis. Under the assumption that he still possessed the artifact, while fueled by the intrigue of the boy’s strength and skill with the Force, the dark lord hires the bounty hunter, Jidné Sheedra, to track him down and have him delivered alive. However, the task becomes a trial for young Jidné, as she faces a conflict that tests her beliefs of a scarred past she had hidden for so long.

Also tagging @berenilion @silver-is-in-too-many-fandoms @justtinfoley @stellar-trinity @justtinfoley @peterwandaparker @justtinfoley @superwarsofthrones @queen-destenie @calgasm @cal-jestis @ayamenimthiriel @calsponchoemporium @sweeetteaa @fallenjedii​

Also in AO3

Tags: Fem OC, Jidné Sheedra, Force-Sensitive! Fem OC, Bounty Hunter! Fem OC, Jedi! Fem OC | Special tags for this chapter: Youngling! Jidné Sheedra, Nomara Anesh, Jedi Master! Fem OC, Togruta! Fem OC,

Chapters: 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 | Previous: Part 13 | Next: Part 15 | Masterlist

14 of ?

JEDI TEMPLE, CORUSCANT

Nomara has returned to Coruscant with little Jidné along. Never has she ever been this careful, ignoring the ache of her arm as she held the swaddled child while her free hand steered her ship—with the partial assistance of Evy—until she landed on the east bay of the Jedi Temple. Nomara marched towards the main entrance of the grand temple while shielding the baby with her other wide sleeve, worried that the unusually strong wind might prick her little eyes.

Upon her entry to the temple, she was greeted by Master Yoda, the little sage being waddled with the aid of his cane. The green Jedi noticed the precious cargo in the Togruta’s arm.

“Back so soon, are you, Master Anesh,”

Nomara bowed curtly in return, “I’ve been only gone for a day and a half, Master Yoda,”

Yoda took notice of the swaddled bundle in the Togruta’s arm a second time. A weak smile managed upon his ancient face.

“Something precious with you, you seem to have brought, hmmm?”

An eager grin stretched upon the young Togruta’s face, she knelt down to his level, and then unfurled a portion of the swaddle that covered Jidné’s face. The child cooed at the sight of Master Yoda’s face—curious and delighted at the same time—the old master chuckled while being in the presence of something so small yet seemingly strong.

Yoda inquired about the child’s origin planet, Nomara indulged the old master with the goings on in Eshyn, he expressed his awareness of the planet’s state as he was also informed during council meetings.

“I swore to her mother that she’ll be taken care of,” Nomara reiterated.

“I understand. Trained and cared for, she will be. A good Jedi, she will grow into.”

Upon those final words, Nomara glanced on Jidné again; she afforded a hopeful look at the child’s face and she was greeted with an infectious, angelic smile—the young Togruta wholeheartedly agreed with the elderly master, she could almost imagine Jidné growing up as a Padawna and then a Knight.

When Yoda offered to summon the caretakers, Nomara politely refused and insisted she deliver Jidné to the children’s ward herself. Yoda caved, they ended up walking together to their destination, bowing to greet those whoever comes in their way.

Nomara was pretty sure that she had sensed it: Yoda’s cautious examination of how she behaved towards him regarding Jidné. Attachment was forbidden to the Jedi, since time immemorial that has been one of the primary lessons embedded into younglings’ minds the moment they can comprehend words. However, Nomara’s notion differed from the Council’s, stemming from the like-mindedness of her master, Loriq Caius—he was more inclined to learning the ways of the “Living Force,” an ideology that he and Master Qui Gon Jinn shared and often find one another in concurrence.

Upon their arrival of the children’s ward, a caretaker slowly approaches the Jedi with the child in hand and transfers Jidné into her arms; for a moment, the baby squirmed and cooed a worried tone to which Nomara quickly hushed softly, comforting the child before being held by someone else. Shortly after the separation, Master Caius himself enters the ward.

“Master Caius!” the Togruta exclaimed.

“I heard news that Nomara has returned quite so soon—with a youngling at that—I just wanted to check on my old apprentice,”

“I’m well, Master. And you?”

“Likewise,” Caius leisurely answered.

The banter was abruptly cut off because Jidné’s fussing had caught all of those in the ward, all heads turned to the child. Loriq got the hint. He examined the child who’s settled in that tiny pod of a bassinet while being bottle-fed. From where he stood, he can sense the Force rippling out of the child in an overwhelming magnitude that it’s unusual to see it from one so tenderly young; he rubbed his bearded chin as he joined the others’ observation of the toddler.

The caretaker approached the Jedi.

“With all due respect, Jedi, it is time for the children’s midday slumber. May I request you to exit the ward?”

The three Jedi obliged and bowed at the caretaker who returned the gesture. The room dimmed as soon as they left the room. Yoda excused himself and went the other way; Nomara was now left with her master by the door.

Ever since Loriq saw the child in the nursery and felt her Force ripple, he sensed something else—from Nomara. It’s as if the amount of Force that Jidné exuded, Nomara’s body—although unconsciously—repeats it, like soundwaves resonating with one another. Before the Togruta could walk away, the master gently tapped her shoulder.

“Nomara, do you have a moment?”

Promptly, the Togruta turned around and faced her master. Standing close to Loriq, she never realized that she was nearly as tall as him, with her montrals boosting her height just three inches more until its tips go past his head—memories of her youth reminded her of how she always had to tilt her head in order to look at him in the eye, but now that she’s grown, she didn’t need to take a pace backwards to see him eye-to-eye.

“Something on your mind, Master?”

“You sense something within the child,”

“Yes, the Force is strong with her that… just by looking at her, it’s overwhelming,”

“In addition to that, Nomara, I’m sure you’ve sensed it as well,”

The former, now-grown apprentice doesn’t follow. She pulled her eyebrows together, shooting a puzzled look at her master and wordlessly asking him to elaborate. Loriq decided to rephrase himself, he shifted and began to walk, Nomara followed by his side as they spoke

“I’d like you to recollect your feelings when you saw the child,” Loriq craned his head to Nomara, who kept her eyes ahead. “Search your feelings.”

Eventually, Nomara narrated everything that she saw in Eshyn—beginning with her meeting with Sentuk until taking Jidné with her, as well as what she felt from the little girl. She explains the feeling as a closeness of sorts, as though the pure feeling always finds its way to her, and then she’d resonate with the child—this occurred constantly ever since she and Jidné touched hands upon meeting.

“It’s only natural for two Force-sensitive to have a sort of connection, however, the difference is that connection grows over time. As for you—and Jidné, I suppose—it’s different, unusual even. The ripple is strong, perhaps the better would be ‘current’ given the magnitude of your Force energies’ convergence.”

“I’m not sure if I’m accurate, but are you implying that two Force-individuals may already forge a connection despite how briefly they just met? Do their energies bounce back one another, like a wave?”

“Perhaps. Whichever it is, it’s a rare Force-sensitive trait. I might have to meditate on it soon,”

The sage Jedi Master stopped walking in place, they ended up standing by the tall window overlooking the city and continued their conversation there with enough privacy. Loriq read Nomara’s silence as an eagerness to watch over the child, given that the first chain links of their bond have already closed. Instead of dismissing the gradual attachment between his apprentice and the youngling, he encouraged her with an open mind.

“The Force is telling you something about and through this child, Nomara. I implore you to allow your insights to serve you well, as I have taught you,”

“I’ll keep in mind, Master,”

——————————————————–

26 BBY

Over the years, Nomara has become a frequent audience member in the arena where the younglings—the prospective Initiates and Padawans—undergo their formal training and education. A single session is equally distributed between typical classroom lectures and application, the latter being the children’s favorite part. The Togruta always keeps a watchful eye on Jidné from the stands, but kept herself subtle; she’d often find herself in the company of the other masters—even the members of the Council themselves—as they observed the children from a distance.

Jidné, now seven years old, has made friends with the male Nautolan named Brese, and another human female, Leane. Each child was just one year apart from the other—but Jidné was the one in the middle—the small age gap made it much easier for them to get along. Master Tera Sinube was today’s proctor, he stood at the center of a ring of excited children who couldn’t stay still with their practice sabers in hand.

Tera Sinube tapped the floor with the end of his cane, “Youngling, younglings! Settle.”

The murmurs of the children died down, allowing Master Sinube to begin his session. He briefed them about the practical application of today’s lecture: performing basic lightsaber stances while balancing their dependence on the Force. Everyone in the chamber sensed some of the children’s gradual anxiety, it felt like too big a task for them to juggle between two abilities—one physically, and mentally for the other—including Jidné and her friends.

“Now, now,” Sinube hushed. “I understand that it may sound and look difficult, but remember: if you let the Force guide you, it will come to each and every one of you like second nature. As easy as breathing, if I may so!”

Sinube decided to encourage the class with a volunteer, when nobody stepped forward after twenty seconds have passed, the old proctor decided to find one himself. He followed the line that the children formed, some of them followed him with their heads or eyes while the others stared blankly straight into random portions of the room to avoid eye contact. While the search for a volunteer continued, the Jedi Knights Mace Windu and Shaak Ti stopped by to do some observing as well.

“Master Windu, Master Ti,” acknowledged Nomara.

Her greeting was returned by the two knights. Shaak Ti stood closer to her fellow Togruta by the stands—they were very alike physically, but their unique markings and clothes distinguished one from the other—they watched the session take place by the rails. The Jedi Master asked Nomara what’s already transpiring, the younger Togruta was happy to fill her in with the details.

Windu, on the other hand, stood by the banister though at a few inches away from the pair. His perpetually-furrowed eyebrows looked upon the gathered children surrounding the single proctor, he watched the older Jedi below circle the group of children with crossed arms and a curious scowl.

“Jidné?”

Despite Master Sinube’s gentle tone, the girl was still startled by the mention of her name. She looked to her friends and they subtly bobbed their heads, prompting her to move. She had no choice but to step forward, both hands clutched around the practice saber’s sleeve; Jidné’s nervous eyes found Tera Sinube returning to the center of the circle, patiently waiting as he leaned on his cane for support, then her gaze panned left and right, and then up and down—searching for some sort of visual signal to calm herself.

Her eyes found a pair of near-identical Togrutas standing next to each other at the stands, but her eyes focused on the one whose montrals had indigo patches snaking along the tapering, white tendrils. Somehow, she recognized that Togruta, and all of a sudden, the queasy stomach she had disappeared.

“Jidné, are you ready?” Sinube checked.

“Yes, Master Sinube,”

“Very good. Now, take your saber and put yourself in a stance, any stance,”

The little girl took a deep breath before buckling her knees and holding her saber in a defensive stance. The old Jedi commended the child. Moments later, he summoned an older child, a blond boy whose age may play along the line of twelve or thirteen—with a single glance of the thin braid hanging behind his ear, everyone knew that he was a Padawan.

“Alright, let’s do some light sparring—while keeping in mind the lessons we learned today,” Sinube placed his hand on the blond boy’s shoulder and gently shepherded him to the spot where he stands. “Paz, you may begin with Jidné here.”

“You ready, Jidné?” Paz checked before positioning himself in a stance.

The little girl nodded, following the words of the lecture and then putting it to play. At the first few seconds of the spar, Jidné anticipated the bigger kid’s attack—she got lucky by evading Paz’s lunge by deflecting his strike, holding for a few seconds, and then pull away to recompose herself for the next attack.

This was only the beginning. Janky strikes between the two children filled the room with the blinding lights of the sabers once clashed, both Jidné and Paz with a novice’s footwork before trading strikes; the other younglings who stood close in the action as the two sparred gave way and then returned when they’ve gotten farther.

As the sparring continued, Nomara brings her chin between her two fingers as she watches the action below ensue—it’s evident she was on edge just by spectating from the stands. The other Togruta dismissed the young Seeker’s mannerism as intrigue—as one would when observing something energetic. As for Master Windu, ever so direct of a man, took note of this too, but didn’t come as gently as Shaak Ti does.

“You seem to have your eye on that girl over there,” Mace Windu points out.

“It’s because I was the one who discovered her,” Nomara spoke with a degree of pride, her private smile was just one inch shy of being a grin.

Jidné eventually came to a point where she used a little bit of the Force out of impulse—outstretching her open hand at him caused him to stagger a few paces back from her. When she succeeded, she bought the opportunity to deliver a flurry of blows; it invigorated her when she pulled off a spinning deflect—a heat of the moment sort of thing, despite being a basic spin—which denied Paz a hit on her when he thought he found a window of opportunity.

The other masters continued their observation, Jidné and Paz’s sparring passively encouraged the other children. It concluded when both children had each other at swordpoint—their sabers hovering mere inches above the shoulder. Jidné and Paz quickly retracted their sabers and bowed while facing each other, a customary greeting amongst the Jedi, old and young alike. Tera Sinube hushed the excited children squirming in place and commanded them to settle down, promising them their own chance to spar.

Jidné and Paz were allowed to catch a breather while the other children prepare themselves, Tera Sinube briefly lectured the children again—reminding them of the practicalities of the assignment so as not allow the excitement cloud their senses. While waiting, the little girl surveyed the stands above them, she angled her head where she spotted the Togrutas together and searched for the one with the particular montral pattern.

There you are… Jidné thought, fixating her eyes on the younger-looking Togruta.

Nomara sensed Jidné’s gaze piercing her, she slightly craned her head to the side where the girl and boy sat and waited. Despite their distance from one another, the Togruta flashed a small smile as her eyes met with the girl’s once more.

[kryptsune]

Contract {Mafiafell} Lore Post

🌼Howdy! I have had this itch to write up something that has been stewing in my brain for months. I know for a fact that you all enjoy my personal universe lore posts and I am sorry I have not done them in a bit. I haven’t been able to draw so that has prevented me from typing them up. That said I really enjoy these so I am going to do them anyway and add the visuals later! I hope that is alright with you all. Now that we got that disclaimer out of the way... there is a lot to get through sooooo let’s jump right in!  *Due to this being a hellish lore there may be triggering or disturbing material ahead. Please be mindful of the warning! Thanks!

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Universe type: MafiaFELL

Relationships: Red, Frisk, Gered 

Alternate “Nicknames” Info: 

Red: Cuban

Boss: Luciano 

Gered: Costello

(Various others)

Main Plot Synopsis: During the era of the 1920s and set within a film noir aesthetic. Frisk is a small PI (Private Investigator) hurting for cash and jobs in the big city. In an effort to make a better name for herself she begins to investigate the rise of crime and strange occurrences happening around her. There are suspicious disappearances, missing person reports, and extra violence that couldn’t be missed by human eyes, right? It just does not seem to add up. Determined and with nothing to lose she is able to put together a series of connections by using some none too savory contacts. 

She finds out that the potential epicenter of these events is tied to owners of one of the swankiest and popular clubs in town. It is also suspected that it is a speakeasy but that is not what has drawn her attention. It would appear that the family running the place has been a mystery to nearly everyone even though they have been around longer than they can recall. No one knows what the owners look like. It is all highly speculative. Photographic proof says otherwise as she tends to find a set of figures at each scene. They wear impeccable pinstripe suits and fedoras but... it could be anyone, right?

Regardless of the information that she has collected, she decides to go undercover to the club, Ossibus Ignem (Fire and Bone in Latin), in order to confirm her suspicions. She decides that auditioning for one of their most prized gigs is a good way to get into their inner circle and perhaps get a glimpse of her potential employers. Frisk wants the truth and nothing but the truth even though this plan is incredibly risky. Even if the brothers, as she finds out later, are not the cause of these events they could still be nefarious. No one likes a spy, especially one within their inner circle.

As she enters she realizes that it is packed like the rumors have told her. She does not get out much due to her job but she is dressed to the 9s in a beautiful dress of the time ready to put her plan into effect. Instead of waiting around she heads to the bar where she is spotted by the seemingly charismatic bartender which she manages to strike up a conversation with. She tries to pick his brain over a drink that he generously slides her way. It would seem that the establishment is already breaking the laws of prohibition. That much is already confirmed.  So how have they not been caught?  

He seems like the friendly sort, platinum blonde hair and a dazzling smile. Frisk being a PI calls into question how perfect he actually looks but puts the thought off. She could have sworn his eyes were far more vibrant gold than what was humanly possible. When she glances at him again however they appear to be light brown instead. Things are already strange as she continues to speak with him only to find out that he is, in fact, one of the brothers that work at the club. It turns out to be a family business. He introduces himself as Gered Fontaine.

Eventually, their conversation is cut short by Gered taking her to the back of the house where presumably his brother is waiting for her to do her little gig. She paces back and forth nervously in her dressing room only to not watch where she is going, running into a tall individual. His pinstripe suit, fedora, and bright red tie cause her to pause only to be greeted with a shiny golden toothed smile. The strange thing about it is that it is shaped into a fang/ canine tooth. It is a little off-putting but the stranger introduces himself as the younger brother of the group, Cuban Fontaine.

Someone that she had no doubt is in all the photographs that she had collected. Ultimately he seems nice enough telling her that if she needs anything to let him know and to take her time with her audition. He does appear to have a mischievous flirty side to him especially with her which she tries to distance herself from. He does not make that easy as she can tell he has already taken an interest in her. 

She performs and it would seem that she has a pretty singing voice that leaves the entire crowd roaring in applause. This obviously catches the eyes of the brothers who are now more than interested in her and she gets the gig. Other than a few of the accidental slip-ups the boys seem fine with her being around them. She doesn’t pose any threat. After all, she is only human.

Frisk begins to enjoy her undercover position but finds herself slipping further and further away from her original objective. The Fontaine family put her up in the loft above the club and treat her well. She learns more about them and more about the family itself. They are pretty open with what they do not even hiding the crime lord status that they are under. Being associated with the brothers is dangerous and therefore they want to make sure she understands what it means to be under the name of Fontaine. 

She is surprised by their honesty and immediately they gain her trust and vice versa. That is until she realizes why she is there in the first place. After one of her performances, she manages to get into one of the boy's rooms, snooping around. Only not to find what she would be expected of a bunch of crime mafiosos. Instead, she finds arcane symbols, tomes, and various other occult items that would lead her to the conclusion that they are in fact dealing with something far beyond the mortal realm. At least that is what she thinks. 

Only to find a secret room with even more concerning items. One such item is a series of documents showing the various victims she had been investigating. On top of that information, she finds even darker dealings than she suspected and papers scrawled with a script she has never seen before. As she turns to leave the room she freezes to hear Cuban’s deep baritone of a voice. He is none too thrilled as he interrogates her but she can’t see his face. All she can feel are skeletal like claws at her shoulders. It’s all in her head, right?

When he turns her around she is faced with Cuban looking quite human explaining to her the predicament she now finds herself. As her confusion grows he keeps her cornered only to be given two choices. One is that she binds her soul to him in the form of a contract and the other, death. Obviously, she chooses to live which Cuban is delighted by. After this event she is able to see the true forms of all the demons in the club, having a panic moment seeing them mingling so easily with unsuspecting humans. Cuban, Luciano, and Gered are the most terrifying being skeleton looking demons. From then on she works in the club learning more and more about their true selves. 

Frisk’s Contract: 

 Frisk’s soul is unique as it appears to be linked to the past ancestry of mages. Due to this her soul is far more powerful and can utilize more of their own abilities. The first contract she ends up bound to is Cubans. In exchange for her life as well as their own protection of her, she works at the club as their little songbird. She becomes an undercover agent to infiltrate the boy's enemies or rivals since the human soul has the ability to mask demonic presence. This deal gives her more than she bargains for like gaining some of Red’s abilities. She ends up with a second contract to Gered for other reasons (spoiler). In addition to using these abilities, the contractee also is able to wield the demon's weapon of choice. Each one corresponds to a specific demon. The higher level the demon the more powerful.

Reds:

(Weapon: Beast- skeletal magic fire beast claws) 

(Primary Familiar form: Cat) 

1. Teleportation 

2. Gravity/levitation 

3. Hypnotic/manipulative song magic 

4. Beast summoning (aka Gaster Blasters) 

5. Being able to read the thoughts and souls of others 

Gereds: 

(Weapon: Reaper- A skeletal scythe with a blade made of magic) (Primary Familiar form: Raven) 

1. Silver tongue- able to talk anyone into anything 

2. The ability to see through the eyes of the dead 

3. Inhuman agility

4. Second life 

5. Dark magic/ curses/hexes/corruption

Fusion: 

Fusion is an interesting scenario since Frisk is contracted to not one but two princes of Hell. She gains many abilities and one of those is being able to fuse her mage soul with that of her demonic counterpart(s) creating a fusion of herself and their own hellish forms. The soul, however, can only stand so much and if it goes beyond its limit the human soul could be damaged permanently. This form is dangerous for any human soul.

Hiding in Plain Sight:

One of the reasons that humans are none the wiser is due to the fact that the demons use magical glamorous to appear human as well. They can also manipulate the mind through abilities like compulsion or illusion. The only humans that would be able to see through this guise are humans that are mages or ones with strong souls. Those that are contracted also are able to see through these guises if they so choose. It can be overwhelming at first.

Frisk’s Ancestry /The Mages: 

Humans in this universe do not believe in the existence of monsters very much like our own world. They are nothing but stories and myths. Demons are the exact same. There is a story that may allude to the fact that demons were created from monsters as punishment for humanity's evil. That is neither confirmed or denied. What is known is that demons used to walk the surface regularly a long time ago.

Humans in their quest for power made contracts with these creatures in exchange for their souls, something that demons covet to gain more power themselves. Those that made these contracts became mages, having demonic magic infused within their very being. As every demon is unique so were the souls. The mages were formed after 7 survivors managed to break their contracts retaining the magic within their souls. As they began to have children that magic too was passed down. Humans with any type of magic are extraordinarily rare and one mage soul can rival over 1000 regular human souls. Frisk appears to have a connected blood relation to one of these surviving lines.

A Hellish Civil Battleground: 

The truth of what is going on the surface can be summed up as a demonic civil war. The hierarchy of Hell dictates that the most powerful of demonkind are the elite and as with any type of power it is highly coveted. There are three categories of demons in order of hierarchy.

The seraphim (aka Princes/King)- The royalty of Hell. These are demons you do not want to mess with. The elite. In total there is a prince for one of the seven kingdoms of Hell. There are also uncrowned princes as well. These demons can do as they please and enjoy their revelry up on the surface. 

Imps (Monsters)- born denizens of Hell that can keep a foothold on the surface for only a short time. They need a bind such as a contract to keep a presence. The soul determines power/magic. They have to be summoned and contracted or else they are banished back to Hell. They can also possess human bodies but the body will start to degrade and decay after some time. 

Changelings (Humans)- changelings are demons stuck in Hell and can never set foot on the surface. They are most typically souls that were broken in the firey pit and twisted into demons themselves. Hell’s royalty does not want to destroy the surface. In fact, they rather enjoy it, though they can make contracts it is more for amusement then power. It is said that demons consume souls to fill the emptiness they once lost but that could just be a myth. It is a fact, however, that the consumption of human souls will give them power. They do not wish to scare off potential delicious human souls so they do not senselessly cause havoc or if they do they clean up their mess.

*The imps are why they are in the city. Their job is to keep them in line but unfortunately, the Imps have started to go rogue and have no regard for rules or order. They have been making contracts with one human to keep a foothold on the surface only to slaughter others mindlessly and causing havoc. This makes it difficult for humans to want to contract for fear of being slaughtered as well as beginning to shift the balance of power. The imps are gaining more and more power due to the souls they are now consuming at an alarming rate. The king is none too pleased hence the Princes being tasked to clean up the surface. It just so happens it is during the era of the ’20s. Making them into mafia crime lords.

How to Break or Nullify a Contract:

Each contract formed is by a person to person basis but there are some things that can break or nullify the contract. 

 1. The demon no longer desires the soul- Rare but possible. If the demon contracted no longer wants the soul they can break the contract if they so wish but that means that the human's magic will still be maintained and able to be passed to their children. 

 2. The human is killed before the stipulations of the contract are fulfilled.

 3. The demon violates the contract set forth. 

 4. The human soul is no longer classified as human.

*note the way that Hell works and functions follows my own Hell lore. A post that I will make shortly and is an addendum to this world I have created. 

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[cyborgsquirrel]

Sanctuary: Chapter 8

Pairing: Wolfstar

Summary: The epic tale of Remus Lupin and Sirius Black, from their first meeting until their happily ever after.

Link to Prologue

Link to All Chapters

Saturday, 4th September 1971, 8:43 am

Remus was on his way down the Grand Staircase for breakfast when a giant blue squirrel startled him by dashing past him up the bannister. He spun around to watch its progress as it continued climbing. The strange creature didn’t seem to have any fur, and its skin had an odd shine to it. If forced to guess, he would say it was made from rubber. Weird. But what else would you expect in a magic school?

As he continued to descend the stairs, the sound of yelling, laughter and running feet reached his ears. He was almost at the ground floor when three Gryffindor second-years darted around the corner and passed him to run up the stairs. They were howling with laughter, and moments later an enormous, orange leopard with pink spots rounded the corner and leapt after them. Remus wondered if the animals were connected to his dorm mates sneaking out of the room the night before. They had been giggling loud enough to wake him up when they returned two hours later.

He reached the entrance hall and flattened himself against the wall. It was chaos. At least a hundred students were crowded into the space. The entrance hall was vast, so this normally wouldn’t be a problem, but there were also hundreds of the strange, technicolour rubber animals bursting out of the Great Hall. Animals that were naturally small were inflated to several times their usual size. While bigger animals, like the deep purple elephant that was forcing its way out through the doors, were normal-sized. There were rubber birds in the air, dive-bombing squealing students, and rubber primates swinging from the light fixtures to land on people’s heads. No one seemed to be able to enter the hall to eat, though several students were still trying.

Remus spotted Professor McGonagall attempting to herd the students back to the staircase, and Professor Dumbledore was standing off to one side watching the chaos unfold with a twinkle in his eye. The sea of students parted, and the tip of a hat bobbed its way down the path heading towards the main doors. A giant rabbit floated ahead of it, trapped in a bubble of faint yellow light. When the rabbit reached the doors, they swung open, and the light bubble vanished. The rabbit bounded away towards the forbidden forest and the watching children cheered.

‘Attention, students,’ Professor McGonagall said, her voice magically amplified to be heard over the commotion. ‘It will take some time to clear the Great Hall. Please return to your common rooms. Breakfast will be served to you there shortly.’

Remus stayed put while he waited for the entrance hall to clear of people. As the students left the area and made room, more animals spilled from the Great Hall. The entrance hall was almost empty of people when Remus heard a series of loud thuds and looked up in time to see the four house tables, led by the teachers’ table, gallop out of the hall. They charged through the throng of balloon animals, knocking them out of the way, and out into the grounds, where they pranced around on the grass, seeming to enjoy the sunshine and freedom.

Remus chuckled and batted his way through the balloon animals towards the kitchens. The prank had been impressive for a bunch of first-years. The balloons were obviously store-bought, but he had no idea how they had animated them. He reckoned he could do better though. A good prankster needed one thing if they didn’t want to be caught. Allies. And preventing your fellow students from eating was not the way to win them. Also, he would do it all with his own magic. He wouldn’t cheat by using store-bought items.

Remus felt a thrill of excitement. After breakfast, he would hit the library. He was bound to find something useful.

-o-o-o-o-

Sirius, James and Peter crouched in the corner of the entrance hall under the invisibility cloak with their hands over their mouths, trying to contain their laughter as they watched the house tables stampeding out through the front doors.

‘I forgot the tables would animate too. This is brilliant,’ James whispered.

‘I know,’ Sirius whispered back. ‘We should get back upstairs though. The teachers will be trying to find out who did it.’

They stood up and stepped away from the wall, but Sirius flung his arms out to stop them when he spotted someone else peeling themselves away from the wall.

‘Wait. Is that Remus?’ he said, pointing. ‘Where’s he going?’

They watched as Remus crossed the hall and headed down to the dungeons instead of up.

‘I dunno, mate, but we can’t follow him now. We need to go,’ James said.

Sirius knew James was right, but he was intrigued and decided he would follow Remus another time. The boys made their way to an alcove where they could remove the cloak without being seen and raced back up to Gryffindor tower. Well, Sirius raced James. Peter sort of just huffed along behind, arriving at the common room a good ten minutes after Sirius and James and finding them already settled in a corner with plates of sausages, bacon and eggs and a bowl of cut fruit. James insisted on the fruit, saying it was, “important to keep one’s body healthy.”

‘Do you two have to run everywhere?’ Peter huffed, sitting down at the table with his friends.

‘Yes. Yes, we do.’ Sirius said, nodding.

‘Don’t complain, mate. If we hadn’t, you wouldn’t have any bacon. Look.’ James pointed at the long table that had appeared in the middle of the common room, laden with food. ‘They’ve already run out. But we got some for you because we’re the best mates in the world.’

Peter picked up a rasher of bacon with his fingers. ‘You’re right. Thank you for running ahead so I could enjoy this delicious breakfast meat, oh wondrous friends of mine,’ he said, before stuffing the entire rasher into his mouth and chewing with a blissful smile on his face.

James laughed and slapped Peter on the back, ‘That’s the spirit.’

The common room was crowded and noisy with the whole of Gryffindor house present and trying to eat. Someone had coaxed a balloon lion through the portrait hole, and the inflated big cat prowled the room, pouncing on anyone who wasn’t paying attention and making them squeal with surprise. Sirius kept an eye out for Remus while he ate, but he never returned from wherever he had gone. He hadn’t eaten for two days now, and Sirius wondered if he should tell an adult, although that went against everything he believed in.

A sudden silence descended on the room, and Sirius looked up from his plate to see Professor McGonagall standing in front of the entrance and every student in the room staring at her in shock. The inflated lion was creeping up behind her, and Sirius gulped. Before the lion could pounce though, Professor McGonagall seemed to sense the impending attack and spun around. With a swift flick of her wand, she cast a spell at the lion, encasing it in the same pale yellow bubble that Professor Flitwick had used on the bunny in the entrance hall.

Turning back around, she glared at the packed room. ‘Misters Potter, Black and Pettigrew, you will come with me.’

The boys stared at each other.

‘How does she know?’ James whispered.

‘No idea, mate,’ Sirius said, standing up and eyeing the furious professor. ‘We better go though. She looks mad.’

‘Follow me,’ McGonagall said when the boys reached her. She flicked her wand again, and the lion floated out of the portrait hole ahead of them. They followed her down several flights of stairs to the first floor, and when they reached McGonagall’s office, she waved them inside before striding over to the window. She opened it, directed the lion through, floated it to the ground and released it to join the hundreds of other balloon animals bounding around the school grounds.

‘Sit down, gentlemen,’ she said, moving to stand behind her desk.

The boys took seats in front of the desk and looked up at her. She made eye contact with each of them in turn, making them squirm in their seats.

‘I’m sure you’re wondering how I know that the three of you were responsible for the chaos this morning?’

Peter nodded.

‘Thank you for that confirmation, Mister Pettigrew.’

Sirius and James glared at him.

‘The Fat Lady informed me that the three of you requested entry to the tower at a quarter to three this morning. Since nobody else was outside of their common rooms after curfew last night, it was a simple deduction. I am very disappointed in all of you. Why you thought disrupting breakfast in this manner was a good idea, I will never understand. It was not only disruptive to the student population on the first weekend of term, but also caused a lot of extra work for the house-elves. It was extremely rude and inconsiderate. Thirty house points will be taken from each of you, and you will each receive two detentions. One for the disruption you caused and one for being out after curfew, to be served with me.’

She turned to glare at Sirius.

‘Mister Black, you have been at school for less than three days and have already earned yourself four detentions. I think that might even be a school record. I want you to attend a meeting with me tomorrow afternoon to discuss your behaviour. Be here at half past seven and do not be late.’

She turned back to the others.

‘Do you have anything to say for yourselves?’

They all stared at their feet and shook their heads. Even James wasn’t brave enough to talk back to McGonagall.

‘Very well. You may go.’

After leaving the office, James grabbed Sirius and Peter by the arm and dragged them down the corridor and around a corner before stopping and bursting into laughter.

‘Oh my Gods, did you see her face? I thought she was going to explode!’ he got out in between snorts.

Sirius stared at him dumbfounded that he could find getting into so much trouble that funny, but the laughter was contagious, and he was soon overcome with his own uncontrollable giggles. The three of them staggered back to the common room, clinging to each other in an attempt to stay upright and trying to regain control. They were still breaking out into the occasional giggle when they climbed through the portrait hole.

-o-o-o-o-

The library was quiet and peaceful, and it smelled of dust and parchment and ink. Remus adored it. He took a deep breath through his nose as he entered the sanctuary and sighed with contentment. He felt so at home in this space. Finding a secluded table in the corner of the transfiguration section, he set himself up ready to take notes and wandered down the aisle to browse. He had some idea of what he wanted to do but needed to do some research to find out if it was possible.

As he scanned the book titles for something useful, he thought back over the events of the last few days. Specifically, his dorm mates. Despite the way Sirius had treated him on their first day, he liked the other boys. Their mischievousness matched his own, and none of them had been horrid to him since. There was also the mystery of the spontaneously appearing sandwich. Had one of his dorm mates left it there for him? And if they had, why? The most logical explanation was that they had noticed his absence from the Great Hall and wanted to make sure he got something to eat, and that was kind—thoughtful even—so maybe he should give them a chance.

Sirius had attacked Snape in Potions class, though. But after what Snape had done to him in the owlery, he couldn’t find it in himself to care. He felt the heavy weight of shame at that thought. He really should care about the unprovoked attack on a student.

Should he extend the hand of friendship? Metaphorically of course, he couldn’t actually touch them. Or was it too much of a risk? Sirius was observant, always watchful of his surroundings and the people near to him. He had the air of a hunted animal about him, and someone like that posed a grave danger to his secret, but was he more dangerous as a friend, or would that make him safer? A friend might be more likely to keep his secret if they discovered it, but they might also be more likely to discover it in the first place.

Huffing with annoyance at his own indecision, Remus scowled at the books on the shelf in front of him. A dark red volume caught his eye. The title of the book was etched in gold on the spine.

“Transfiguration en masse”

It sounded perfect. He pulled the book down and returned to his desk with it. Opening the book to the contents page, he ran his finger down the list.

Chapter 1 - Introduction

Chapter 2 - Theory

Chapter 3 - Focusing your mind

Chapter 4 - Channelling

He turned to chapter two and scanned until he found what he was looking for.

“Unlike instant transfiguration, which is dependent, to a certain extent, on the size of the caster’s magical core, delayed transfiguration is only limited by the amount of time the caster is prepared to expend. By channelling one’s magic into a container to be used later, a witch or wizard can increase their transfiguration ability infinitely and without risk.”

This was exactly what Remus was looking for. He flipped to chapter three and read through the information carefully. It seemed his months of meditation were about to pay off in an unexpected way. The complicated technique necessary for the spell to work wouldn’t be a problem for him, while it would take months of practice for someone who had never meditated.

He scanned through the information in chapter four, just to get an idea of what channelling his magic into a container would involve. To his relief, it didn’t sound too hard. The technique was similar to channelling into a potion, but harder because of the need to keep focusing on your target and your intent at the same time. He felt confident that he could manage it though.

His plan was coming together, but it wouldn’t be successful unless he could delay the transfiguration until a specified time, after the magic was transferred to an object placed in the container. He needed a timed activation charm and a way to combine it with the delayed transfiguration spell. With this in mind, he strolled over to the charms section of the library and didn’t take long to locate a book called Timing Your Talents. A quick flick through the pages revealed the spell he needed, and it had a low difficulty rating so he should be able to cast it with a little practice.

Remus was pleased with the afternoon’s work, but he still needed to combine the spells. He searched the library for another hour but found nothing useful until he reached the section on spell creation. Maybe he could devise his own method. He removed several books from the shelves and returned to his desk to study them.

Another hour later, Remus had three sheets of parchment filled with scrawled notes, equations and diagrams. And a functioning spell to combine the transfiguration with the charm, or so he hoped. Now he just needed somewhere to practise. He packed up his things and returned the books to their homes—he had no wish to annoy the librarian and get banned from the library—before grabbing his bag and leaving to search for a suitable location.

Remus climbed the stairs to the fifth floor, and it didn’t take long to find an empty classroom. He decided to practise each element separately before attempting to combine them and began with the delayed transfiguration spell. Pulling out an empty potion bottle from his bag, he scanned the room for an object small enough to fit inside it. He couldn’t see anything at first. The room contained nothing but dusty furniture. Some old desks, a few chairs, an empty bookcase and a blackboard hanging on the wall with rude words scrawled across its surface.

Eyeing the desks, an idea occurred to him. It was disgusting. Really gross, in fact. But needs must. He bent over and looked underneath the nearest desk. Yes. What else would you expect to find on the underside of school desks but used gum? That is so nasty, Remus thought, as he scraped off a wad, but it would be simple to transfigure, making it kind of ideal for the first attempt.

He placed the hardened wad of gum on the desk next to the potion bottle and pulled out his wand. Closing his eyes, he conjured up a mental image of the gum and, while holding that image in his mind, he pictured a second image, a perfect cube of gum, at the same time. Next, he pressed the tip of his wand against the potion bottle and tried to locate his magical core inside himself. In doing so, he lost focus on his mental images. Dammit. He opened his eyes and glared at the gum in annoyance.

Trying again, he located his magical core first and began the channelling process before conjuring up his mental images. He muttered the incantation under his breath and continued to channel for several seconds to be sure there would be enough magic stored to complete the transfiguration. It was a tiny object, and he was only altering one aspect of it, so it wouldn’t take much. He would need to do some careful calculations before the actual event, though, to make sure it worked as planned.

Finished, he picked up the gum and dropped it into the opening at the top of the bottle. He was delighted when it instantly changed shape into a perfect cube. He tipped it out and scraped a second piece of gum from the underside of the desk and repeated the process. This time focusing on an image of a perfect sphere of gum and channelling magic for twice as long into the container. Remus dropped the first piece of gum in, and it changed into a perfect sphere. Now to test if the effect would work on a second item as intended, or whether the magic had all been used on the first item. He dropped the second piece of gum in and it changed just like it was supposed to. Remus was thrilled. He hadn’t expected to have so much success so fast.

The coming moon was already affecting him; he could feel the pull of it, and his energy levels were dropping, but he wanted to finish the preliminary tests today so he could move on to practising on larger items after his transformation. If the combining incantation he had put together didn’t work, then he would need to return to the research stage, and there was a high possibility of it not working.

Recalling the incantation for a simple gouging charm, he tried it out on the desktop first to make sure he could do it and then cast it with the timing charm, setting the activation for five seconds. He waited the five seconds, and a deep gouge appeared on the desk, right where he had cast it. With both elements of his spell working, he now needed to test them in combination.

He went through the process of channelling and conjured his mental images of the current gum spheres and the perfect cubes he wanted them to become. With all the elements in place he spoke the words of the timing charm followed by his combining incantation and finishing with the delayed transfiguration spell. He continued to channel enough magic for two transfigurations. With the spell complete he dropped the two pieces of gum into the bottle, nothing happened. Good. Remus tipped the bottle up to empty them back out onto the table. The timing spell was set for midday, so he sat down while he waited. He was exhausted.

At exactly midday, the two pieces of gum on the table transformed into perfect cubes, Remus smiled at the sight. Moments later his eyes drifted closed, and he fell asleep.

-o-o-o-o-

After their dressing down from McGonagall that morning, Sirius, James and Peter had returned to the common room. There had been some talk of getting homework done, but James had shot the idea down and suggested playing a few games of exploding snap instead. Sirius had never played before. His parents believed card games to be a waste of time, but he got the hang of it fast and was soon winning every game. While they were playing, Sirius noticed two red-headed boys watching them. They looked old enough to be seventh-years, and they were identical.

‘Don’t look around, but we’re being watched. Two seventh-years. They keep staring at us and whispering.’

‘The ginger twins?’ James asked.

Sirius nodded.

‘Yeah, I noticed them looking at us when McGonagall came to get us earlier. Maybe they’re impressed.’

‘Or they’re planning something,’ Peter said.

‘Could be. We should watch our backs.’ Sirius said.

After lunch, James suggested they explore the castle a bit. Sirius agreed because he hadn’t seen Remus since that morning and it worried him. Wandering around the castle seemed like an excellent way to find him without it being obvious he was looking. Peter was as enthusiastic as he always was for anything James suggested. The boy had a serious case of hero-worship.

The three boys set out wandering the corridors with no particular destination in mind, poking at oddly shaped bricks, pulling at light fixtures and speaking to portraits and statues. They were on the second floor when Peter found something, quite by accident. Meandering down a deserted stretch of corridor, Peter had caught his foot in the bottom edge of a tapestry that was a little too long for the wall it was hanging on. As he tripped, the tapestry was pulled back, revealing a hole in the wall behind it.

Peter went crashing to the floor at the same moment that James yelled, ‘Hey, you found a secret passage, Pete!’

‘Dunderful,’ Peter said. ‘I bit my dongue.’

‘Shake it off, mate. You found the first secret passage. Let’s see where it goes,’ Sirius said.

The passage was dark and dusty, and smelled faintly of cabbages. The only light was filtered through minute gaps in the walls on either side. Sirius wrinkled his nose but led the way in. Peter took the rear, carefully pulling the tapestry back into place behind him. They followed the path around several twists and turns, and up a few flights of stairs, before reaching what appeared at first to be a dead end. The passage was blocked off by a smooth slab of wood; they pushed against it, but it wouldn’t budge.

‘Feel around, see if there’s some kind of button or switch to open it,’ James said.

They all fumbled around in the dim light for a few minutes when Sirius announced he had found something.

‘I think it’s a rune, like the ones on our desks in Potions.’

‘Tap it with your wand then,’ James said.

Sirius pulled out his wand and tapped it against the carved symbol in the top-left corner of the wooden barricade. The wood slid to one side and revealed an abandoned classroom, thick with dust. Sirius walked in first and jumped out of his skin when he spotted a slumped figure sitting in a chair.

‘Remus!’ he gasped, before hurrying over.

Was he sick? Hurt? He had to find out. In his haste to reach the boy, he knocked into a table. It was just his luck that it was the only table in the room that had anything on it. The glass potion bottle fell over when the desk was jostled, rolled and tumbled to the floor where it smashed with a loud crash. Sirius was just reaching out his hand when Remus leapt out of the chair.

‘Don’t touch me!’ Remus screamed as he stumbled backwards, knocking over the chair he had been sleeping in seconds before.

Sirius, startled, jumped away. Remus stared at him with wide, frightened eyes, before grabbing his bag from the floor and running from the room, slamming the door closed behind him.

Sirius looked at James. ‘What the fuck?’

James shrugged. ‘I don’t know, mate. That was weird.’

‘What was he even doing in here?’ Peter said. He studied the broken glass on the floor. ’Do you think he took something?’

‘Maybe,’ James said. ‘I’ve heard about potions that make you feel good. When they wear off, they can make you angry and paranoid. Do you think he’s an addict?’

Sirius frowned. ‘Fuck. That’s even worse than the last theory.’

‘Do you think we should tell a teacher?’ Peter asked.

‘Not until we know something for sure. If we’re wrong, he won’t thank us for accusing him,’ James said.

‘That’s true,’ Peter agreed.

‘Let’s just keep an eye on him for now,’ Sirius said.

-o-o-o-o-

Remus paced back and forth in the owlery where he had taken refuge after running from his dorm mates. Rieka was perched on his shoulder, nuzzling his cheek to offer comfort. He felt like an idiot for reacting so violently, but he had been terrified waking up to find Sirius bent over him. So close. His hand reaching out to touch him. Infecting the Black heir would have been the end of his school career, and he’d only been there three days. He ran his hand through his hair in frustration, trying to decide what to do. Judging by the darkness, it was approaching curfew, and he would need to return to his common room soon, but he really didn’t want to face the others. His reaction had been extreme, and they were bound to tease him about it.

‘What would you do, Rieka?’

The owl whistled softly.

‘I know, I should go back to the common room.’

Rieka hooted in agreement.

‘Okay, okay. I’ll go. Hopefully, they’ll have gone to bed or something,’ he said, not really believing it.

On arriving at the Fat Lady, Remus took a deep breath before giving the password and climbing through. The common room was busy with students relaxing, and the noise was deafening to his sensitive ears. He scanned the room but didn’t see his dorm mates anywhere. Despite wanting to put off the confrontation with them as long as possible, he knew he wouldn’t be able to bear the noise of the common room this close to the full moon for long. Hunching his shoulders and drawing his arms around him, he hurried across the crowded room and up the stairs, taking care not to touch anyone along the way.

Remus pushed open the door to his dorm and stepped inside. The noise from the common room cut off the moment the door closed behind him. The dorms must be charmed to keep out external noise. Good to know, he thought. Sirius, James and Peter were sitting in a circle in the middle of the floor playing a card game that involved three decks of exploding snap cards, a generous bowl of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans and an assortment of socks. Remus didn’t want to know.

‘Remus!’ Sirius said, jumping to his feet. ‘Mate, I am so sorry for scaring you earlier. When I saw you slumped in the chair, I panicked. I thought you were dead or something.’

Remus blinked. That was not what he had expected at all. But an opportunity should never go to waste, and he needed to make sure nothing like that happened again. What if he hadn’t woken up in time?

‘It’s okay. It’s just, I don’t like to be touched. It’s a phobia, you know? Like some people don’t like spiders.’

Peter shuddered. ‘I know exactly what you mean,’ he said, glancing up at the top of the walls as if checking for potential eight-legged company.

‘Oh Merlin, I feel even worse now. I really am sorry. I hope you can forgive me,’ Sirius said. ‘We noticed you weren’t at dinner, so we bought some food back for you. A peace offering?’

Sirius produced a plate of cold meats and potatoes from the cupboard next to his bed and handed it to him. Remus had been too upset to go to the kitchens for dinner and he was starving. His stomach rumbled at the sight of the food. He took the plate and thanked Sirius before sitting on the end of his bed to eat.

‘We brought dessert too,’ Sirius said with a grin, pulling out a fat slice of triple-layer chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and strawberries on the side.

Remus licked his lips. He could almost feel his face light up just from looking at the delectable plate of chocolaty deliciousness.

‘Now that,’ Remus said, reaching out for the dish, ‘is an apology. Thank you. Thank you very much.’

‘You're welcome. And your preferences have been duly noted,’ Sirius said, handing it over with a wolfish grin.

‘I added the strawberries,’ James said, shrugging. ‘Thought you should have something healthy too.’

Chapter 9 

[shirokodomo]

[Hakudōshi Verses]

With my new blog theme I can’t provide a link to the verses page as before, therefor I will also post about them here. 

This is a rather long post, so you can find the verses under the cut! They will be divided in three categories: Main, AU and Canon Divergent.

More verses will be added to this post and to the blog itself as they are created.

MAIN

AGE: 8-11 (Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: Canon Universe POSITION: Naraku's servant / Plotting to overthrow Naraku The canon verse everyone is familiar with, in here Hakudōshi was originally Naraku’s human heart, the Infant, before being split in half by a dying priest, from which the right half of it grew into Hakudōshi. He is a deceiving, manipulating little devil that doesn’t hesitate to kill his preys but also enjoys to play games and torture them, he often gets his hands dirty and doesn’t mind it and appears to be an incarnation who is almost as loyal to Naraku as Kanna is. He is also very clever and usually is several steps ahead from his enemies. He has, however, his own agenda and eventually plots with his other half to overthrow his creator and take his place. Interactions with this verse will vary between the Hakudōshi that is a loyal servant to Naraku and the Hakudōshi that is already plotting the betrayal with his other half, it will all depend on the plot of the thread. I am fine with the interactions between our Muses being hostile and harsh, Hakudōshi is a villain after all! Since the canon material with him isn’t much, a lot of things will be headcanon based, especially when it comes to his betrayal towards Naraku as personally I think the reasons for his betrayal were a bit bland and empty.

AU

AGE: 11-12 TIMELINE: Early 2000's POSITION: Heir of the Makai Company, one of the most wealthy families in Japan. An AU where the series characters are all humans and no demons exist. Hakudōshi Makai is the 11 year old son of Naraku Makai and Kikyō; the couple went through a complicated and harsh divorce but through the corrupt system, Naraku gained the full custody of his son and made it so his now ex-wife could never see their son ever again. Prior to these events, Hakudōshi was extremely close to his mother and thus her leaving left an empty feeling on the boy. This and Naraku's manipulation over him lead to Hakudōshi believing that every relationship is meant to be doomed sooner or later and that the concept of a happy family does not exist. The Hakudōshi of this verse does not possess the same manipulative and cruel nature of his canon counterpart, however, he can be cold and even distant sometimes. He eventually opens up to others but it takes time. During free time, between Junior High School lessons and education regarding the family's business, Hakudōshi practices kendo and also horse riding lessons, he has a horse of his own a white mustang named Entei, he has owned it ever since it was a foal, and it was a gift from his mother. It is a gift he treasures dearly.

Variations of this verse may be created.

AGE: 19 (Biologically) | 12-13 (Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: x784 POSITION: Half-Demon | Former slave of the Tower of Heaven | Independent Mage An AU created for interactions within the Fairy Tail universe. Hakudōshi is a half-demon who during his early childhood was captured and taken by a Zeref following cult, for the same purpose as the other kidnapped children by them: build the Tower of Heaven to resurrect Zeref. During the rebellion led by Erza Scarlet, Hakudōshi escaped by using one of his abilities: Teleportation, once he was freed from the Magic Stealing Stones, instead of joining the rebels. After escaping, Hakudōshi set on to his main goal: find his twin brother, Akago, whom he had protected and prevented from also being captured by the cult. Due to his half-demon genes, Hakudōshi's body grows “slower” than the average human or demon, although his age keeps up with that of a human, his current appearance is of a child. This often leads to other people, wrongly, looking down on him when he takes up job offers. Although he possesses other abilities, his main magic is named Reversal Magic which is essentially a magic that allows Hakudōshi to absorb Caster type Magic into a barrier and then redirect it back to his opponent. It doesn’t work with Holder type Magic. With training, Hakudōshi develops other minor abilities which are connected to his demon side.

AGE: 19 TIMELINE: 2010 onward POSITION: Vampire turned by Naraku | College student An AU verse in which the main focus is supernatural stuff, this means, vampires, werewolves, ghosts, witches, etc. It is loosely based on The Vampire Diaries/The Originals series. Hakudōshi is an adult in this verse and his features remain the same as his canon counterpart: white hair, pale skin, violet eyes. Hakudōshi prior to his transformation was a normal boy, 19 years old, who had just entered college. Distant, not very social, generally quiet but quite intelligent those were the words that described him. His life turned completely upside down when one day he stayed till late at the school’s library, studying, and at some point heard noises, moans and what appeared to be screams coming from one of the classes. Upon investigating, he caught one of his teachers feeding on a student, literally feeding. The teacher, Naraku, realized the extra company at the room and decided to silence the boy. But Naraku realized who it was, one of his favorite students and instead of simply killing him, he decided to toy with him. Feeding him his blood and then snapping his neck, the vampire left Hakudōshi alone at the school along with his now dead victim, blood dripping to the floor. When he woke up from his temporary death, it was night and Hakudōshi felt an inexplicable thirst, not for water but for blood. He saw the dead student and without being able to control himself drank the remaining blood but it was not enough, it only made him more thirsty. This lead to him going to his house and murdering his family, only coming to his senses when it was already too late. Naraku watched him the whole time in delight and attempted to approach his most recent creation, to gain control over him, but Hakudōshi rejected his control and escaped, using and discovering his new inhuman abilities. With his emotions extremely amplified and still not understanding what had happened to him, he soon discovered he could no longer walk in the sun, it burned him and so he had to hide during the day and hunt at night, to quench his thirst. His path eventually crosses with that of Kohaku, a supernatural hunter trained from a young age to kill especially vampires like him. Despite having been taught to hate and kill these bloodthirsty monsters, Kohaku noticed the despair of the vampire and choose to help him control himself, teaching him a new diet not human based and eventually provided him a ring which allowed Hakudōshi to walk in the sun. Hakudōshi, after turning into a vampire, becomes extremely sardonic and doesn’t easily trust anyone. Being ironic is what he does best, he berates others, mocks them. This was his way to protect himself and the only one who succeeded so far in breaking that shell was Kohaku, although that only happened because he spared his life.

CANON DIVERGENT

AGE: 8-11 (Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: Post Ep.1 of Inuyasha: The Final Act / Chap.370 POSITION: Escaping from Naraku and The Infant This verse starts with a twist on the first episode of Inuyasha: The Final / on chapter 370, in this verse Hakudōshi doesn't die at the hand of Miroku's Wind Tunnel. Instead of losing his mind and trying to kill Kagura at any cost, Hakudōshi uses his miasma in order to escape from his enemies while his body keeps regenerating to its normal state; later he reunites with the Infant and Mōryōmaru in order to set up a new plan to get their hands on Kohaku's shard, the wicked Infant however has other plans for his "brother". With Naraku now being aware of their betrayal, the Infant states that he no longer needs Hakudōshi's help and that it is time for them to become one once again by having Mōryōmaru absorb him into his body, just like he had intended to do with Kagura. Hakudōshi refuses and they engage in a battle which ends with him barely escaping but successfully retrieves the jewel shard in Mōryōmaru's belly. The demon child is now completely alone, no allies and a lot of enemies with two of them constantly trying to capture him and kill him (Naraku and the Infant); this leads to Hakudōshi not trusting anyone he crosses paths with and being even slightly paranoid especially after he realizes the Infant is trying to enter inside his mind, to take over his body as well, and that he also has some sort of control over his regenerating abilities, slowing it down and making it far more painful. Hakudōshi eventually sets on a goal to find a way to create his own heart so that he can sever his connection to the Infant and eventually kill both his other half and Naraku.

EXCLUSIVE WITH: konosesshomaru AGE: 8-11 (Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: Between the events of the Devil’s Crag and Kagura’s death. POSITION: Traveling with Sesshōmaru's group A variant verse of "Abandoned". Naraku discovers earlier Hakudōshi’s and the Infant's plans to overthrow him; he absorbs the Infant back inside him and to make his former right hand man physically suffer, gives him a heart of his own so that real wounds -that actually take a long time to heal- can be inflicted on the child. Hakudōshi has no choice but to flee for his life as Naraku's demons chase him and he ends up being rescued by Sesshōmaru, who then makes the decision to take him under his wing at least until the boy's wounds are healed. Afterwards, he leaves it up to Hakudōshi to decide if he wants to stay with them or not. With Naraku now constantly chasing after him, Hakudōshi chooses to stay and travel together with Sesshōmaru and his group.

EXCLUSIVE WITH: thecursedpriestess AGE: 8-11 (Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: After Hakudōshi was pierced by Kikyō's arrow POSITION: Loyal to Kikyō | Travels with her After being pierced by Kikyō's arrow, shot by Kagome back in the Underworld, Hakudōshi is sired to the priestess due to her spiritual power having made some sort of connection with 'the Onigumo in him' instead of killing him -since his heart was somewhere else-. Afterwards Hakudōshi begins to feel strange whenever Kikyō is mentioned and no matter how hard he tries, he can't hurt her neither physically or emotionally. He eventually realizes what happened and though initially he hates the idea of being sired to the woman he was supposed to hate, the more times his path crosses with that of Kikyō's, the more loyal he seems to become to her. Hakudōshi, at some point, stops resisting and chooses to stay by the priestess's side. The bond becomes so strong to the point the child is willing to die for her; however what he doesn't understand is that the bond stopped being a 'sired bond' and has become one of a mother and her child.

AGE: 8-11 (Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: After Kagome's permanent return to the Feudal Era POSITION: Brought back to life by a demon named Kirimi Not long after Kagome’s permanent return to the Feudal Era, a demon going by the name Kirimi (切り身, ‘Cutting Flesh’) begins an attempt to revive once powerful demons. They pretend to follow the steps of the deceased Urasue and even surpass them by improving the technique. Kirimi starts by reviving minor demons, at first to merely appreciate their work from afar and even see the need of improvements. Then they move on the next step: start reviving the deceased incarnations of Naraku. Unlike Urasue’s creations, Kirimi doesn’t use ashes and clay instead they use: an object that once belonged to the demon intended to be revived and that retains said demon’s “essence”, Kirimi’s own blood to create the connection between them and the revived demon and the heart of a sacrificed human. To revive Hakudōshi, Kirimi used the blanket that once belonged to the Infant’s right half, the one who later regrew into the child incarnation, and the heart of a human child. Thus instead of being a body made of clay like Urasue’s creations, Kirimi’s revived demons have a body made of flesh but only possess one organ inside them: the heart of the sacrificed human. Hakudōshi is then revived but he doesn’t appear to possess any memories of his life before his first death. He only reacts to his name and the reason seems to be that because Kirimi used the Infant’s blanket, an object worn by Hakudōshi only prior to be being cut in half and shortly after his body regrowing, therefore the “essence” within the blanket doesn’t “possess” Hakudōshi’s memories in the child-like body. Kirimi allows him to go so that he can retrieve his memories, once that is done they would be able to control Hakudōshi as their personal weapon along with the remaining incarnations they intended to revive. Hakudōshi then wanders through the lands, vaguely remembering the face of a woman carrying an Infant (Kagura) and the killing of monks. Believing that is how he will recover his memories, the newly reborn incarnation begins killing monks in the same way him and Kagura did in the past.

AGE: 20+ | 8-11 (Permanent Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: Hanyou no Yashahime & onwards POSITION: Lives isolated in a mountain | Independent Demon Slayer After Kirimi’s death, Hakudōshi eventually recovers all of his memories, not just of the person he used to be but all the people he has hurt. Regret is a strong word for him, does he regret anything? He doesn’t, he did what he was born to do. Regret won’t bring back those who died at his hands or those who were hurt. He is capable, however, of apologizing despite knowing the most obvious answer is that he isn’t forgiven. That is fine by him. To his surprise, Kohaku asks him to come train for a while at the new Demon Slayer village. The boy hasn’t forgiven him but his kind nature doesn’t let the former incarnation simply go. He goes and after becoming a skilled Demon Slayer, Hakudōshi retires to a mountain and only leaves it when there is a dire need. He gains the title of The Demon That Slays Demons. This is where he will stay and watch as the new generations are born, grow and eventually surpass the old. The entire experience changes his personality to somewhat more calm, less brutal and cruel, the sadistic incarnation of Naraku is no more, but he is still Hakudōshi, the White Child.

EXCLUSIVE WITH: @adversitybloomed​

AGE: 8-11 (Physical Appearance) TIMELINE: After the Infant was split in half POSITION: Adopted by the Hua family | Doesn't know his connection to Naraku

After the Infant was split in two, the right half of it was supposed to remain dead while the left half regenerated back into its original form. In short, the right half was supposed to be nothing but dead meat. Given this, Naraku ordered Kanna to look after the left half and get rid of the right one. The incarnation did as she was told and abandoned the half on a river, allowing the strong stream to take it away. Something unexpected happened and the right half regenerated just like its left but it was completely alone. Although still a demon, the baby appeared to have lost its memories and even its previous speaking ability, therefore the only way to grab the attention of anyone passing by was of a normal baby: cry. And so he did and soon enough he was found by Hua Mulan. She knew he was a demon the moment she set her eyes on him and even so still took him. She took had demonic blood in her. Having lost its speaking abilities, at least for now, Hakudōshi spoke to Mulan through his mind ability but could only tell her his name as he didn’t remember anything else. Mulan decided there and then to officially adopt and raise the little baby as if he were her own son. Because of his demon origins, Hakudōshi grows and develops much faster than the average child; each month he grows more and more although at some point it should stabilize. He is happy, he loves his mother and has a big respect for the Hua family, never does he want to tarnish their name. But danger lurks around every corner and unknown to him, his life is still connected to that of Naraku’s and thus it is threatened to be taken should his infant counterpart meet his demise...

....

These are the current verses. I also have a verse for Crossovers but I am a bit selective regarding the fandoms I accept RPing with in this verse.

[shipping-receiving]

Fictober 2019 Day 22: “We could have a chance.”

Rating: T | Word Count: 3069 Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire / Game of Thrones Relationship: Jaime Lannister / Brienne of Tarth Tags: Alternate Universe – Office Notes: In this bit, I swap POVs pretty regularly. Triangle ▼ indicates Jaime's POV, circle ◯ indicates Brienne's. 

Office AU Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5

(read on AO3)

//////

▼

Alright, Jaime, play it cool, Jaime tells himself. He folds his arms and leans back against his car in what he hopes is a natural pose. You have a plan. After dinner, when you’re both alone, ask if this is a date, tuck hair behind ear, let finger linger on cheek, etc. He looks down at himself. Is this pose terrible? It’s terrible. Maybe I shouldn’t fold my arms? He shifts and rests one hand against the side mirror instead. What do I do with the other hand now? He places it on his hip. This is stupid. Oh fuck, I see her.

◯

Stay calm, Brienne, Brienne tells herself as she pauses just inside the main entrance of her apartment building. It’s just dinner. You never said ‘date’, did you? You can still pretend it’s just dinner. She can see Jaime through the glass, standing at his car in what looks like a very uncomfortable position. He needs to stop rolling his sleeves up to his elbows. Wait, no, he should never stop doing that. By the time she steps out of the building, the heat of her blush has already spread throughout her entire body.

▼

She’s here, she’s here. The words are an alarm in Jaime’s head as Brienne walks towards him, and he pulls his hand back from the side mirror with a jerk. She’s wearing the blue blouse he likes, the one she was wearing at the office when he first noticed her eyes, but this evening she’s worn it loose and paired with dark jeans. She’s blushing already; that’s a good sign, right? Okay, Jaime, be smooth.

“Hey,” Jaime says in greeting. Fuck, that wasn’t smooth, that must have been two octaves lower than my regular voice. He clears his throat. “Hey, Brienne.”

◯ 

“Hey,” Brienne replies, trying to get a hold on the tremor in her voice. She absently smooths down her blouse, the one she knows he likes because it brings out her eyes. “Sorry for the late notice.” Why the hells am I speaking like I’m writing an email?

“No—” Jaime scrambles, “Don’t apologise for—I’m happy to—I would have—” and then he just exhales without finishing any one of those sentences.

“Well,” Brienne says, softly and courageously, “I’m glad you could make it.”

“Me too,” Jaime smiles.  

▼

Don’t apologise for asking, was what he meant to say. I’m happy to have dinner with you anytime. I would have dropped everything even if you had given me five minutes notice. Okay, maybe not that last one, that’s probably too much.

He opens the car door on the passenger side and gestures to the seat. “Shall we?”

“Oh! Um, I was thinking we could walk.” Brienne rocks slightly on the balls of her feet. “I know a place about ten minutes from here. Maybe not as fancy as you’re used to—” Oh fuck, does she think I’m too fancy? “I mean, it’s nothing fancy, but it’s good. It’s seafood, if that’s alright with you? I called ahead and booked a table, but we can always cancel it.”

◯ 

Oh fuck, now he thinks I think he’s too fancy. Brienne just wanted to pick somewhere familiar, and safe, and reliable. The food is delicious enough that he’ll remember the experience, but the ambience is also casual enough that it could just be a meal between friends, if that’s where this ends up going.

“Sure. Seafood sounds great.” He closes the door and locks the car. “We can walk. Is it okay if I park here?”

“It should be fine, I think.” Brienne points uselessly in the direction in which she’s already started walking. “It’s this way.”

“Seems like a nice neighbourhood,” Jaime comments, as he catches up.

“Oh, it’s decent. Quiet. A bit of a distance from the office, but the rent is reasonable enough that I can still get a small apartment to myself.”

“That’s nice,” he nods. “Having your own space.”

▼

I hate small talk. I am above small talk.

“How was your day with Margaery?” Jaime asks.

Is this small talk? I’m showing interest in her life; that’s good, right?

“It was good. She’s…” Brienne bites her lip. “We had a good talk.”

Do I want to know what they talked about? Did they talk about me? Is that why she texted me? Jaime opens his mouth and almost asks a question to that effect, but decides against it. I don’t want to know, anyway. Do I?

He opens his mouth again as they stop to wait at a crossing, but before he can think of the right phrasing, Brienne turns to him. “How was your meeting with the client yesterday?”

“What meet—Oh! Um. It was good too. Illuminating.” Gods, has a meeting with a client ever been ‘illuminating’? She’s going to see right through this.

But Brienne simply says, “That’s good.”

Jaime tries his best not to think about elopements. Damn it, Tyrion.  

◯

They cross the road and walk for the next block or so in an uncomfortable silence. Brienne doesn’t know why Jaime is being so quiet. He’s usually the one to get their conversations going. I should have just let him drive, she thinks, though the restaurant is barely two minutes by car from her apartment building.

▼

I’m being too quiet. I’ve clean forgotten how to make conversation. Quick, Jaime, think of something to say.

And so Jaime blurts out the only thing that’s on his mind right now.

“Is this a date?”

▼◯ 

Oh fuck.

◯ 

Brienne stops in the middle of the pavement. If she could have done so by screeching to a halt, she would have. “Oh! Oh gods—”

“I’m so sorry.” Jaime wipes his hand down his face. “I didn’t mean for it to come out quite so… bluntly.”

“No—um—it’s fine. It, it doesn’t have to be a date if you don’t want it to be.” No, Brienne, that suggests you already think it’s a date. “Uh, I mean, do you want it to be a—”

“Yes!” Jaime exclaims before she can complete her question. “… Do you?”

“… Yes. I think I do.” She should probably be making eye contact while saying this, but Brienne is finding the cracks in the concrete beneath her feet particularly fascinating right now.

“Okay,” Jaime responds, and he seems on the verge of laughing with relief. At least, that’s what she can tell while still staring at the pavement. “Good. Great.”

▼

They turn and walk a few more steps, as if everything hadn’t just changed between them. Jaime didn’t tuck her hair behind her ear, or let his finger linger on her cheek while she blushed. But he got an answer, and it was the answer he wanted.

He can’t seem to stop grinning.

Then, he feels a tickle on the edge of his palm. He looks down just in time to see Brienne retract her hand back to her thigh.

“Shut up,” she mumbles.

“I didn’t say a word!” Jaime protests, bringing his eyes up to her face. She’s still refusing to make eye contact. He didn’t think he could grin even wider.

“You were going to.”

“If I was going to, I would have said, ‘Go ahead. I want you to.’”

He can see her shift her gaze from her own feet to his hand again. She grabs it, not gently, but urgently, as if she would have lost all her bravery if she had waited a second longer.

“Shut up,” Brienne mumbles again.

Jaime obeys. He intertwines his fingers with hers.

◯ 

Jaime’s hand is warm. Brienne knows it is warm because it is connected to her own hand. She curls her fingers upwards, matches her fingertips to each of his knuckles. Her thumb strokes the flesh in the curve between his thumb and index finger. His hand feels muscular, how could a hand feel muscular? But of course a hand that is linked to Jaime’s forearm must be—

And then she realises they’ve missed a turn entirely.

“Sorry, we’ll have to turn back. I forgot to take a right back there.” She leads him back in the direction they came from. Because she can do that now. Because she is holding his hand.

“Good,” Jaime replies.

“Good?” Why would that be good?

He lifts their hands slightly. “More time for this.”

Oh.  

▼

The restaurant is small, but cosy. An eclectic assortment of historical illustrations of the Stormlands hang on its walls, alongside other decorative items featuring various marine animals. There’s a remarkably big model of a crab hanging over an empty table in the corner, and Jaime isn’t sure whether to be relieved or disappointed when they’re directed to a different table.

He trusts Brienne to order her usual—she seems to be pretty friendly with the owners, who look at him approvingly. He finds this to be quite the confidence booster, and sits up a bit straighter in his chair. He can feel his knee touching hers under the table.

“Hey,” Brienne says, after she’s ordered. “How are you with spicy food?”

I’m pathetic. “I can manage.” I’m an idiot.

“They have this amazing homemade hot sauce here. It’s not on the menu, but I always ask for it to go with my shrimp. We can get it on the side as a dip.”

“I’m game.” I’m also an idiot, but I already knew that part.

Three shrimps-dipped-in-hot-sauce in, Jaime is already sweating.

“I thought you said you could manage!” Brienne laughs, as she hands him a paper napkin.

“I lied,” he confesses, dabbing at his nose.

“Why would you do that?”

“I don’t know.” Fuck this hot sauce to all seven hells and back. “To impress you, I guess.”

Brienne blushes as she moves the bowl of sauce towards her side of the table. “You don’t need to do that, Jaime.”

“Isn’t that what people do on first dates?” he says, from behind the napkin.

“I guess so.” Brienne gives him a rare smirk as she dips her entire shrimp into the sauce and pops it in her mouth. She’s superhuman. But I think I already knew that part, too.

“My plan backfired, anyway.” Not that it was an actual plan as opposed to a stumble headfirst into hubris. Or rather, stupidity.

“I don’t know,” Brienne says, in the direction of the hot sauce. “You made an effort. It’s endearing in its own way.”

Jaime would be pleased by that if he wasn’t otherwise occupied with chugging his glass of iced water, and motioning to the server for a refill.

◯ 

The owner of the restaurant offers a sort of conspiratorial smile to Brienne while Jaime takes his credit card out to pay for the meal. She’d be more comfortable going dutch, to be frank, except they’d had enough arguments over the past four weekends about who would pay for entrance fees and sandwiches and ferry tickets and so forth. Jaime almost always won, on the basis that she was doing him a favour in the first place by showing him around.

As the little machine spits out Jaime’s receipt, Brienne remembers Jaime physically blocking her from handing cash over to the bewildered woman at the art museum’s ticketing counter. And how she found that he had slipped money into her pocket at some point during their time on Tarth, though she had deliberately arrived at the ferry terminal early so she could buy their tickets for them both. She wonders if she should feel offended. She bites back a smile instead.

They walk back to her apartment building, hand in hand. They don’t speak much again, but the silence is something pleasant this time. As if a weight has lifted, and yet also settled between them both. She reaches her other hand over and wraps it around his forearm. Gods, it feels even better than it looks. How is that even possible?

They reach his car, linger there, hands still glued together. Ask him, Brienne. Just ask. What’s the worst that could happen?

“Do you—do you want to come up? Margaery brought wine this afternoon but we didn’t get around to it. If you’d like some.”

“Oh! Uh—”

And then Brienne realises how that sounds. Oh gods, I didn’t mean to imply— “I don’t mean—” Fuck, does he think I’m— “I haven’t even—” Nope, he doesn’t need to know that— “I just mean, it’s nearby, and the only thing around here that’s open late is this one pub and that can get really noisy—we could go sit in the park, I suppose, but it’s pretty dark right now and it’s a bit of a detour—”

“No, I, I would love to go up—I mean—to, to talk. Or whatever.”

Or whatever.

▼

And, it’s awkward again.

Brienne is sitting next to him on her couch, both her hands in her lap, and she’s so stiff that he’s reminded of the way she sits at her desk at the office. He lets his eyes wander around her apartment while they sit in silence. Everything is simple and functional, save a framed picture on a bookshelf of someone he assumes is her father. But it feels warm nonetheless. Maybe it feels warm because Brienne is in it. Because it’s an extension of her. He thinks, for one of the few times in his life, that he is in a space that feels like a home.

Their two glasses of wine sit on her coffee table, untouched.

“Brienne—” he starts, but at the same time five words come out of her mouth in a rush:

“I’ve never kissed anyone before.”

◯ 

Brienne had been thinking about it the whole way from his car to her couch. It seemed to her like that was where this night was headed, and she just couldn’t stop thinking of those five words. They echoed in her brain as she poured them two glasses of wine, and set them down on the coffee table.

But I didn’t have to say it, did I?

“Shit. I didn’t mean to—” She brings her hands up to her face, as if she could contain the burning of her skin with her palms.

Then, she feels Jaime’s hand wrap around her wrist, guide her hands down.

“Okay,” he whispers, though there’s no one around to overhear his words. It’s just the two of them, on her couch. This—this is the entire known universe. “Thank you for telling me.”

And then he shifts toward her. Their thighs are two parallel lines, defying all mathematical logic by meeting at every single point. One of Jaime’s hands winds around her waist, towards her lower back. The other is moving up to caress her cheek. Brienne can’t tear her eyes away from his lips, which are moving in closer and closer and—

▼

“Ow! Fuck!”

Jaime’s brain is reverberating in his skull. Okay, so maybe this doesn’t hurt as bad as that one time him and Addam decided to headbutt each other for fun (it wasn’t fun, and they were more than old enough to know that it wouldn’t have been). But when you’re expecting lips to meet instead of foreheads—

“Oh gods, I’m so sorry Jaime.”

“It’s fine,” he says, as he rubs his brow with his fingers. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay. I’m sorry. Do you need ice, or something?” He feels her tender touch on his forehead, something selfless, though it must have been equally painful for her.

“No, I’m fine, really.” Jaime opens his eyes and looks through the mess of all of their fingers. Her blue eyes are glistening in the warm glow of the lamp standing next to her couch. “Oh hells, Brienne, don’t cry.”

“I’m not!” she insists. And then a tear runs down her cheek. “Well, I wasn’t going to until you said that!”

He wipes away one tear, and another. “If you don’t want to—if you’re not ready—we don’t have to.”

“I want to,” she says. It sounds to Jaime like fear and desire in the same breath. “It’s just—I’m nervous because I really want to, and I’ve never done it, and I don’t want you to think—”

◯

Words don’t exist.

Jaime is kissing her and words don’t exist.

What are words? There is only the feeling of his lips on hers, his hand around her neck, his hand that she already knows is warm because her own hand has held it, his other hand on her cheek. There is only her own fingers in his hair, tracing the ridges of his scalp, down to the back of his neck, daring to slip beneath his collar, and Brienne finds perhaps that she has no need for oxygen ever again.

When Jaime breaks from her, all the words come rushing back into her brain, and with that, all her thoughts, her fears. “How was that?” she can’t help but ask.

Jaime just smiles at her, and doesn’t answer. Perhaps words stopped existing for him too. After a while, he asks, “How was that for you?”

“I… I liked it.” It sounds trivial, when she puts it like that. But she can’t think of anything else to say. She just knows she doesn’t want to kiss anyone else but Jaime. Ever. But maybe that’s something she should keep to herself, for now.

“I liked it too,” Jaime echoes, still smiling at her. “Do you want to—we could keep—”

“Please,” she hears herself say. Please.

As Jaime leans towards her again—leans over her, more like; she must have reclined onto her cushions at some point in that period of wordlessness—Brienne suddenly feels compelled to voice a confession. To put something into words.

“Jaime,” she whispers up to him. “I—I never thought I would have a chance at—at any of this.” A chance at dates, and kisses—and whatever comes after, eventually. A chance at love, she dares to think, even if she won’t say that word quite yet, and won’t for a while longer.

“I could say the same to you,” he breathes.

“Really?” How could that be possible?

“Really,” Jaime says, with a quiet conviction, a singular truth. He tucks her hair behind her ear, and lets his fingers linger on her cheek. “But we could have a chance, don’t you think?”

This time, Brienne doesn’t reply. She doesn’t put it into words.

Words—words don’t exist. Not for the rest of this night.

[starfaring-princelotor]

Ranting anon. I have a lot. I’ll try and split this into pieces. I wouldn’t say that Lotor was my absolute favorite character, but he was an enjoyable and interesting one. He was a more refined antagonist (not necessarily a villain) who had every capacity of being a great ally and friend. I won’t lie, I liked the idea of Allura and Lotor together, (1/?)

As a parallel to Zarkon and Honerva by being a Galra/Altean power couple that fought for good instead of evil. Lotor is clever and diplomatic and poised, so I honestly thought that he could help Allura cool down her impulsive nature and rash temper and help her become a good leader through example. (2/?)

But in the end, all we got was Lotor giving her an ego boost that in the end didn’t even matter because she dropped him like a hot potato in what feels like a forced “girl power!!” Moment. And I feel like that’s a big problem with how Allura’s character was handled. (3/?)

She’s meant to be this wise, kind, but fierce leader lady, but unlike say, Zelda (another warrior princess,) she doesn’t display the patience or level-headedness that Zelda does, despite people making numerous comparisons between the two. The argument that she’s inexperienced falls through halfway through the series at the very least. Allura never takes any steps to curb her temper or his pushy nature. (4/?)

And somehow no one calls her out on it! A big red flag for me was her reaction when Keith was revealed to be half galra and she just…turned fucking mean for no reason. And while Keith felt guilty for something he shouldn’t have felt guilty for, everyone else was…taking her side? (6/?)

And basically the matter is resolved by him mostly apologizing and her kind of mumbling a half-assed sorry. She was literally being racist to someone she called a friend right until she found out about his heritage. Despite him having done absolutely nothing to her. And no one called her out on it. That pissed me off. It feels like the paladins personalities suffered in order to make Allura look good. Like their moralities and personalities got tossed out the window to revolve around her. (8/8)

A forewarning to Lotura shippers, I never liked the ship in the first place, so if you are looking for validation about Lotura or even Allura herself, this rant is not for you. Allow me to pitch in my own two cents about myself, Allura, the Paladins, and the comparison referring to Zelda.

Anon, let me just say this first, I adore reading the asks you sent because all of it was basically the biggest problem I had with Allura the second she was revealed in Voltron. And the main reason for that? Was how she introduced herself by being a glaringly-obvious Princess-brat trope that does not think before she decides to speak. This was her first rash and impulsive act as a “royal” Princess.

This is why I have a hard time believing those who say Allura’s racism towards the Galra is valid because, I do not know about you, but being cryogenically frozen during the heat of war then waking up and thinking the main important thing to do is call someone’s ears hideous? What happened to “the war is still fresh in her mind”? And no, suddenly opening up a journal to remember “Oh, yeah, the war! Zarkon evil! I should be angry!” does not fly with me. 

I am not saying her trauma is not real, only her reaction to it is slightly misplaced. 

In any case, let us move on to the comparison of Allura and I being similar to Honerva and Zarkon. Oddly enough, I did not see this clicking at all in the show. Mostly because, in terms of what happened between them story-wise, Allura and I are more like Alfor and Zarkon. And this is just based off their relationship. Maybe I am a man who strives more for platonic relationships in shows aimed towards children, but I really did not feel the romance at all in Lotura. 

Not even with the sickening way she suddenly started pining after me at the realization that I am half-Altean.

And this is the big point in the show. Zarkon and Honerva loved each other not because of their race, but because they just do. Alfor and Zarkon? They both use their power as royals to achieve a greater good. Except, in the case of Allura, she chose to commit unspeakable acts of betrayal based on feelings. Sounds oddly familiar to Alfor, no? Sacrificing all of Altea to ensure she lives? Because he is such a good father, pure of heart who must protect his daughter at the expense of not one, but two entire planets. 

He loves her so much, he sacrificed his own people for her. That is why Allura is more like her father in that aspect. Both rulers let their feelings control their actions. Throughout the entire 8 seasons of Voltron, Allura has constantly gone either completely irrational or completely poised for the public, never in between. She does her self-sacrificing bit way too many times and, when she coincidentally lives afterwards, she puts herself on a pedestal as if she was right in her self-indulgent martyr actions.

Which she most certainly is not, because it is common knowledge that if you want to help people, you should be actively staying alive to do so. It is as though once she believed all “her” people died, she has no real purpose to stay around after her grand plan of eradicating all the “evil” Galra from space gets completed. I am sorry to say, or perhaps not, but she really does remind me of a terrible Mary Sue who can do no wrong. Alive or dead. 

And this shit? Gets brushed aside or ignored by a majority of the Paladins. I will go ahead and blame it that most of them are all very, very young and lack the experience to speak out against those in charge. In fact, the only two who spoke against her in any sense were Shiro and Keith, even Pidge for family reasons. Shiro when he wanted to support putting myself on the throne and Keith? Well, that is a bit more complicated. 

Anyone remember the scene where Keith kept telling Allura that he does not want to hear a lecture from her, and she does it anyways because she is just looking out for Voltron and emotionally guilting him is the best way to go about it? No? Oh, right, maybe it was because she acted like a mother admonishing him for “shirking” his responsibilities. I do not even need to go on about how much I heavily dislike one of the two female members mothering her teammates.

You know what would have been a great development here? If she supported him instead of “disciplining” him as if he stayed out past midnight. Maybe not even support him! Just be like “Okay, I know this is important for you, so tell us what we need to do to help you. We’re a team and as a team we will help you however we can.” 

In this sense, Shiro was trusting Keith and doing the right thing by giving him the space he needed to find himself. Allura, on the other hand, was pushy and ultimately did not care at all for him as a person, but him as a useful Paladin tool. If he was so revered as the Black Paladin, then should she not be, I do not know, following his orders by the T? Or is her role as a royal, Altean Princess whose spirit is connected to Voltron more important?

And even before all this, she believes her and Keith are supposedly buddies now since she gave a half-assed apology for being a racist cunt to him. No one, I guarantee you, no one forgets racist comments, regardless of repaired friendships. Especially when her cold-shoulder and outright blatant ignorance is being seen as “Oh, it’s okay for her to feel like this! What do we know, we’re just humans from Earth who have apparently never read a history book.”

Before I get into the nitty-gritty details about why comparing Zelda and Allura are the same people, let me just say this concerning Allura’s hot-headed temper and unchecked racism involving a relationship with myself. That shit does not work and Allura should have taken the time to sort herself out before mixing in a “loving” relationship with an Altean and Galran man. I am all for equal support in a couple, but she did nothing to support myself as a person because she never saw both sides of my heritage. 

Allura only saw Altean blood and hyperfixated on that alone. Which, do I even need to spell out how terrible it is to judge someone based on their appearance? Based on their race? Whether in a good or bad light, she once again goes from “I will not have some quiznaking Galra on my ship” to “Your mother was Honerva? You’re Altean!” mode. It is fine to be prideful, but she should have already known the dangers of being too prideful of one’s race. 

Considering she is a royal, considering she was raised with political knowledge, considering her father and the Emperor of the Galra Empire worked together, Allura should have been aware of her Achilles Heel and understand her responsibilities. 

Okay, now, Allura being like Zelda? 

Alright, I only played a handful of LoZ games, but even I know that Allura is absolutely nothing like Zelda, even with both of them having the Princess title. 

We already established that Allura is way too rash and irrational when under any duress. Even when shit is not going down, her way of thinking is very straight forward and linear, disregarding the bigger picture as a whole for her own closeted judgements. Allura has even ignored her royal advisor’s advice too many times to count, excusing her reasoning as “It’s the only way, Coran. I must do this.”

Zelda? Zelda does not, at all, follow Allura’s way of thinking. In fact, OoT has a similar plot to Allura and myself. Link skips 7 years of his life, wakes up to Hyrule being controlled by Ganondorf, and the Princess is MIA. Though, if any of you have played the game, then you know that the Princess was actively trying to save the kingdom. Not just Hylians, but Zoras and Gorons as well. 

And the way she accomplished this was by disguising herself as Sheik. Not because she was a coward, but because she knew the importance that came with being a Princess, the next heir to rule, and the one who has the Triforce of Wisdom under her control. Key word here: WISDOM. Something Allura did not display at all in the show. 

If we are comparing Zelda to any character, she is more like the exiled Prince than Allura herself. Both Zelda and myself have the wisdom and first-hand experience of suffering under active war. Both actively saved, or tried to save, those they came across. And both understood the political discourse that hurt everyone, not just one specific race. Everyone.

But if that is the case, then Link would be similar to Allura in the sense that they both woke up to disaster. The big difference between Link and Allura? Link would not have killed Sheik once he revealed himself to be Zelda. Not even because Sheik was being deceiving. Link would understand why Zelda had to hide for her own safety, because she was vital to the plan to restore balance to Hyrule. 

Even if Link was miffed about Zelda not being truthful? He knows that, under no circumstances, can they chance the risk to kill her over his own personal feelings.

“But that doesn’t mean Zelda never curbed her temper!”

In Twilight Princess, when the kingdom was already starting to fall under evil clutches, Zelda teams up with Midna, an exiled Princess of the Twilight world. I can not imagine how helpless Zelda felt in the face of Zant overthrowing the kingdom, but did she go off and leave the citizens to suffer for all of eternity? No. She accepted aid from those who were willing, even the Princess of the other world. 

And, on top of that, Zelda understood that Midna’s world and her own were like two sides of a coin. They must coexist with each other to achieve peace. In fact, I vaguely remember Zelda sacrificing herself to help Midna. Imagine that. Using your powers to help the “enemy” for the greater good. Tell me when Allura helped the Galra out of her own free will? Her own understanding that the Galra need her help just like every other race in the universe?

No, the BoM does not count. Not with her attitude shining through after her “Zarkon is in power because you guys are cowards!” spiel. Not when she begrudgingly helped save Warlord Lahn while simultaneously profiling him out of spite with “Did you buy those weapons or steal them?” And no, not when she built Sincline with myself with the intention to harvest unlimited quintessence then immediately turn around and aid in murdering me, the Emperor of the Galra Empire, over a weak accusation. 

Overall, Allura really is the type of person to barge into other people’s problems, claim “I am here to help you all!”, then throw a hissy fit when people ask for specific aid rather than follow her “My way or the highway” attitude. Terrible writing or not, she was always like this since the very beginning. It is kind of like…she had many chances to improve, but she just made her own situation worse and refused to stop to reflect upon herself.

[raendown]

Pairing: MadaraTobirama Word count: 3954 Chapter: 10/? Summary: Not all wars are fought on the battlefield. Some are fought at the conference table, with whispers in the shadows, or even in the bedroom.

In a world where the Senju and Uchiha traditional lands were too far apart to have ever made them enemies, Butsuma and Tajima are the ones who come together and sign a treaty of peace. Madara isn’t happy to have his life signed away for him in a political marriage to strengthen the bond between their clans. He is even less happy to have Tobirama make assumptions of him from their very first night together. What follows from there is a journey of healing, of learning, and finding the places to belong in the places least expected.

Follow the link or read it under the cut!

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Chapter 10

Despite sharing an office with two other Senju who had chosen to devote themselves to administrative duties over active missions, on a day to day basis Tobirama found himself alone more often than not. His two office-mates were both the busybody type prone to sticking their noses in to other people’s business but it served them well when they had both also taken on perhaps more duties than wise. Most of their time was spent in other people’s offices speaking about one project or another, sometimes milling around in what was coming to be known as the Mission Room to gather information from their returning soldiers.

Usually Tobirama had very little problems with the way this worked out for him. The rare occasions when one of his office partners took it in to their heads to bother him about his own work were well worth suffering through to earn his own quiet space the large majority of the time. In fact, it was only now as he sat staring across the desk at a middle-aged woman with all the markings of a civilian that he realized there might be one downside to having the room to himself.

He didn’t have anyone to fall back on for picking up his slack with socializing.

Though he tried his best not to look too intimidating or disinterested, there was only so much he could do without slipping over in to Hashirama territory and greeting her with a hug or some other garish nonsense. The woman stared back at him as one does when faced with a particularly daunting task and visibly steeled herself before stepping further in to the room.

“I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” she said and Tobirama shook his head.

“Paperwork is patient – sometimes. How may I help you?”

“Oh I don’t – um. I don’t need any help. Actually I was hoping to present Tobirama-sama with a gift if that- if that’s okay?” Clearly nervous, she still managed to gather the courage to step a little closer and clutch tightly at the satchel she was wearing on one side.

Intrigued, Tobirama blinked. “A gift? I’m not sure I’ve done anything to earn such things.”

“Well, um, Tobirama-sama might think of it as more of an apology.”

At the curious tilt of his head the woman rummaged through her satchel in a flurry of motion before holding out a small package with both hands shaking ever so slightly from the tension in her body. The package itself was wrapped in plain blue cloth and tied neatly with a white bow. Tobirama took it from her more because he was worried she might think he was rejecting her offer than anything else, a little too stunned to know how he should be reacting himself.

“I can’t imagine what you need to apologize for,” he murmured, one eye on the package and the other on his guest. Her looks were distinctly Uchiha if one were able to see past the softness of her civilian musculature and the unusually light shade of her hair.

“When Tobirama-sama came to the clan we did our best to respect your traditions and treat you as we thought you would expect to be treated. Madara-sama has spoken to us and told us of the insult we gave by accident. We didn’t mean to!” Her buried bow rather neatly covered the way Tobirama’s jaw hung loose with shock. “Please consider this gift an apology from my friends and me in the marketplace. We only sought to make Tobirama-sama more comfortable but in our ignorance we–”

“Please,” Tobirama interrupted her, half standing from his chair and reaching out as though to physical stop her from bowing. “There’s no need to apologize. I was never angry.” Well, not after the situation was explained to him and he’d had time to calm down. He’d been sad, of course, but he wasn’t going to mention that to this earnest woman here trying to make amends for something that wasn’t her fault. Feeling extraordinarily awkward, Tobirama looked down at the gift in his hands and murmured, “You really didn’t have to get me something.”

With slow words the woman pursed her lips and asked, “Does Tobirama-sama wish for me to take the gift back?”

“Let’s not start a loop of accidentally offending each other, I beg you.” Rubbing the space between his brows, he nearly missed it when his guest began to laugh.

“Of course not, my lord.”

He opened his mouth to tell her she didn’t need to call him lord or anything of the kind but she spoke just before he could, dismissing herself and bowing out of the room with well wishes and urgings for him to enjoy the present. Tobirama slumped back in to his seat without really knowing how he felt.

The gift itself was surprise enough but to know that Madara had spoken to his people, presumably at one of the clan meetings Tobirama had never bothered to attend, and explained how their good intentions had gone wrong? Of all the kindnesses he never would have expected from his husband that was something he wouldn’t have even thought to put on the list. It was downright thoughtful.

Such a gesture deserved one in return, of course. Tobirama knew enough from observing other marriages in his own clan to know that give deserved take. The main problem was that he had no idea what gesture he could make in return. All the things he thought he knew about Madara from exchanging letters had been rendered unreliable by the discovery that it hadn’t been Madara he’d written to after all and it wasn’t as though he’d spent a great deal of time getting to know the man since their wedding night. If the last couple of weeks had told him anything it was that he should probably do so now. Better late than never.

First, however, he needed to open the bundle he was still holding absently between both hands. Soft blue cloth rustled softly as he gently set it down to fiddle with the bow. Just cutting the white ribbon felt like a disservice despite there being no one here to judge him for his present opening habits so Tobirama took a moment to pick the bow apart and slide it off, allowing the cloth wrapping to slough down and reveal the contents. He recognized the packaging as soon as he laid his eyes on it and smiled. Surely it must have been nothing more than a lucky guess for the woman and her friends to pick out his favorite incense, the same scent he’d been burning since his mother passed away because it carried so many memories of her, but he could appreciate lucky guesses when they hit the mark so well.

The gift included a new burner which Tobirama very carefully put away in his desk drawer so he could decide where to set it up later. He didn’t want his officemates using it without asking and there was little point in setting it up in either his lab or his home since one was not an environment for open heat sources and the other he still didn’t devote more time to than necessary.

It was with that in mind that he checked the time and stretched his senses in search of Madara. Unusually considering it was the end of the work day his husband was making his way up to the top floor of the tower to drop off whatever files he needed to in his father’s office, something he normally did at lunch. Tobirama did not envy him that duty. Tensions had been high between the two founders of their village over the past little while leaving everyone but the two heirs grateful that they were afforded the distance of sending their work by courier. The runners, at least, never seemed to get yelled at for bearing bad news. It was easy enough to have everything of his own work squared away by the time Madara's chakra signature backed out of Tajima’s office to descend the main staircase.

At first sight his husband paid him no more attention than they usually afforded each other when passing in the hallways. Tobirama figured he had only himself to blame for the necessity of turning quickly on his heel to fall in step with the man he was looking for.

“Did you need something?” Madara's voice carried the faintest overtones of apology and Tobirama very carefully looked straight ahead as he answered.

“Nothing,” he admitted. “We’re both leaving. I just thought we might walk together – if you are headed towards home, that is.” Too late it occurred to him that Madara might have made other plans for his evening than hanging around in a house where he usually found himself alone.

Just in time to be as annoying as all older siblings were destined to be, Hashirama appeared between them a moment later and clapped his best friend on the shoulder. “Ready to go?”

“Ah.” Tobirama desperately hoped he didn’t look quite as awkward as he felt.

“Oh, I almost didn’t see you there, Tobi!” Hashirama smiled and tried to clap him on the shoulder as well, a gesture he brushed away before it could connect.

“Get your eyes checked, I’m not even the same color as anything in this hallway.”

“Hey!”

Ignoring that pout was easy after a lifetime of practice. Tobirama blinked past him at Madara and decided he didn’t even want to make an attempt to figure out what thoughts were going on behind that strange expression. He’d already embarrassed himself, the best thing to do now if he wanted to salvage his pride would be to bow out with grace and not make a scene.

Madara had other ideas, apparently.

“Go away, Hashirama,” he grunted shortly. Tobirama blinked while Hashirama clasped his chest like he’d been stabbed.

“But we were going for tea!”

Trying to be subtle, Tobirama shook his head and murmured, “You are free to go enjoy your tea.”

“I said go away. We can have tea tomorrow.” Madara retaliated to the kindly greeting his friend had given him by clapping Hashirama so hard between the shoulder blades that he stumbled and then stepped around him to pull Tobirama away by the sleeve. “Don’t give me those sad eyes, you just spent all day with me! You’ll survive without tea. Go home to your wife.”

“You didn’t have to ruin your plans,” Tobirama told him as soon as they stepped outside and left Hashirama out of earshot. “I really didn’t need anything important.”

“Maybe I was just tired of his face.” Underneath the gruff bravado Madara's voice still sounded vaguely apologetic and that was just embarrassing enough for Tobirama to shut his mouth with a light cough. He was the one who had interrupted previously made plans but there was no way he was having this ‘no need to apologize’ conversation twice in one day.

He settled for an awkward nod and trying to remember what he was supposed to do with his arms while walking. Why, he asked himself as they both joined the crowds choking the streets, had he thought this was a nice gesture? Not a single topic of conversation occurred to him no matter how desperately he wished to fill the silence. Instead they rounded two corners and crossed at least a quarter of the distance back to their shared domicile in utter silence, occasionally peeking over at each other only to look away in a hurry when their eyes met unexpectedly.

At some point the crowds began to thin and by the time they passed out of the village center in to the more residential areas they were nearly alone on each street. Tobirama continued to wrack his brain for something to say all the way up until Madara finally broke the tension.

“Were you…planning to stay in tonight?” he asked. Tobirama was glad they weren’t standing still, which made it much easier to resist the urge to shuffle his feet like a nervous child.

“Unless you were hoping to invite guests. I wouldn’t wish to intrude.”

“S’your house too,” Madara said under his breath.

An odd thrill ran through Tobirama’s limbs when he heard that and he found himself asking, “Is there anything in particular you might like for dinner? I wouldn’t mind cooking.”

“Oh. Uh. I don’t know, whatever you feel like making should be fine.”

He was indescribably grateful that Madara didn’t bother with any polite refusals or asking if he was sure because just making the offer in the first place had taken enough courage and he wasn’t sure he could have defended his own decision. Not when convincing himself to make it in the first place had already needed so much effort. The thrill of success felt a little like electricity at his fingertips, though, and he found that his thoughts were much clearer now that the silence wasn’t quite so stifling between them.

“I was thinking gyudon. Not that difficult to make and it’s nice to have something other than fish at least every once in a while.” Also from what he could remember of the last time he poked his nose in to the kitchen for a quick meal he was fairly sure they had everything he would need to make gyudon.

“That sounds fine. You…like fish?”

“My favorite. Any kind of fish, really, but there’s this one kind I tried the last time I was in Uzushio–” Without even realizing what he was doing Tobirama hared off on a tangent about one of his biggest passions outside of anything related to battle: the many and varied seafood dishes he had enjoyed in his lifetime. Madara actually asked a few questions so it wasn’t until he saw their house down the street that he realized he’d just babbled away their entire journey about fish. In his efforts to build more positive relations between them he had probably just alienated the man by painting himself as a boring idiot with nothing better to talk about.

A great deal of effort went in to snapping his jaw shut to cut off the flow of inane chatter and Tobirama silently made a few unflattering comparisons between himself and his brother as they stepped in to the house together. They busied themselves with kicking off their regulation sandals and setting them in neat little pairs on opposite sides of the genkan. While Madara pulled off the light coat he’d thrown over his typical robes and hung it up Tobirama scurried out of the way and turned towards the kitchen.

The first thing he did was open the fridge and shove his head out of sight behind the door where he could squeeze his eyes shut and berate himself for being so stubbornly awkward. Never before had he had such trouble communicating with other people – and that was saying something considering how stiff and unapproachable even his own reserved clan tended to find him. Yet here he was with a husband of his own and years of lessons in the Senju traditions all running through his mind telling him exactly how to charm his spouse, make the best of the life he had been given, and still he found his brain as empty as a leaking sieve.

Before he could do anything as telling as give himself a tight slap across the mouth to get his thoughts in order Madara stepped hesitantly in to the kitchen as well, forcing Tobirama to scramble for the ingredients he would need and pull away from his hiding spot.

“Would you like some help?” Madara offered. “I can prepare the vegetables if you prepare the beef.”

“Oh. Yes. I would- thank you.”

The break in his words seemed to amuse Madara, if nothing else. Tobirama supposed laughing at him for tripping on his own speech was better than scowling darkly at him for daring to step foot inside the home before night had fallen.

With a startling amount of ease the two of them danced around each other in the limited kitchen space, each attending to their own half of the preparations. Tobirama could have sworn he felt Madara's eyes on him a few times as he sliced the meat and cracked a few eggs in to a clean bowl but each time he turned to look he found the man’s eyes locked on to the onions and scallions before him. Either he was imagining things or his hyper awareness of every move they both made was playing tricks on his mind.

He had only just added the onions to the pan he’d been heating when Madara once again proved himself the braver of the two of them in social situations like this, keeping his attention on the sauce ingredients he was measuring out.

“I understand you were part of the meeting with the Inuzuka delegation?” he waited until Tobirama nodded the affirmative before going on. “What’s your impression of them?” Tobirama kept his face towards the onions to cover up the shock that his opinion might count for something.

“Loud,” he murmured because that was the first thing that came to mind. “An uncouth bunch from my experiences, although they make excellent trackers and their skills on the battlefield are not to be sneezed at. If they are allotted a separate compound as most of the other larger clans have asked for then I don’t foresee many problems with their integration beyond the usual phase of finding where they fit in best and who they get along with the easiest.”

“The adjustment period.” Madara nodded agreeably.

“Precisely.”

Stirring his onions and pulling the sliced beef a bit closer in preparation, Tobirama dared to peek over at his husband. Not so much at his expression, thoughtful and focused on their conversation as he appeared to be, but rather at the man himself. Long dark lashes framing deep set eyes with permanent dark circles that would not have worked on any other face. Cheeks that never quite lost the final bit of baby fat, puffing out with indignation and rage almost every time he left the house. Small bits of hair broke off from the thick tangle flowing down his back to hang down and frame his face like a living portrait. All in all he made quite the image. Enough so that Tobirama came very close to getting lost in that image until Madara turned to him with a questioning lift of one brow.

“No qualms with them, then? You’ll welcome them in to the village once they finally sign the treaty like everyone else?”

“Well…I could live without the dogs they insist on taking with them everywhere.” Tobirama wrinkled his nose. He understood the bonds they made with their companions but…

“If they kept cats I would be much more enthusiastic to have them here.”

He blinked, not expecting to have his thoughts given voice. “I feel much the same. Cats are cleaner, quieter, and much more suited to the life of a shinobi who doesn’t wish to announce their presence ten minutes before they arrive anywhere.”

“Exactly! I’m sure there must be some nice folk among the Inuzuka but…they’re just so loud, them and the dogs both. We’re not likely to make great friends off of the battlefield.” Madara shook his head.

“Your territory was a little closer to theirs than ours was before the village was built and I have to say”-Tobirama paused to smirk-“I don’t envy you that. Allow me to thank you now for keeping them occupied and saving me the headache of dealing with them more often.”

“Little shit.” Madara rolled his eyes but he too was smiling and Tobirama felt like he’d won a medal.

“I already had Hashirama to deal with. Adding the Inuzuka in to the mix would have driven me crazy before I reached double digits.” Just thinking about it made him shudder. He couldn’t imagine what sort of madness he would have had to put up with if he’d had to battle Hashirama’s frequent idiocies on top of smelling the Inuzuka’s dogs every time he stepped outside the compound walls.

He doubted any of them had even tried owning cats, the heartless bastards.

Madara, on the other hand, appeared to be a smarter man than Tobirama knew in that he also preferred cats to dogs. On the list of things he thought they might have in common he really should have expected that one considering the relationship between the Uchiha clan and the ninneko hidden beneath the streets of Sora-ku. Tobirama had never been able to keep a pet cat before, not wanting to set off Hashirama’s allergies, but he wondered if maybe now Madara might be okay with it. Village life lent itself much better to keeping pets anyway.

“That’s very fair. Much as your brother has become a very dear friend I don’t know that I would survive living with him.” His husband laughed and Tobirama was surprised to feel jealously at his words. A friend, Madara had called him, and he trusted that Hashirama felt only the same in return. There was no need to worry himself about whatever relationship was building between the two of them but they had at least a kind of relationship and for that he envied his own sibling.

“If I know my brother then he’s probably invited you to stay the night after dinner several times.” Tobirama finally deemed the beef cooked well enough and slowly began to add in the ingredients for the sauce. “Perhaps you should take him up on the offer sometime and experience for yourself the horrors I’ve had to put up with.”

“Like?”

“Ugh, like his morning breath.”

Apparently that wasn’t the sort of answer Madara was expecting because it startled a booming laugh out of him, unselfconscious and free in a way Tobirama was sure he himself had never managed in his life. Mirth painted twin circles of pink across Madara's cheeks and the look was so nice on him that Tobirama nearly forgot to stir the gyudon to keep their dinner from burning. Unsurprising, that. Physical attraction had never been the problem between them; Tobirama could remember having to control his face very strictly upon catching his first glimpse of the beauty he was to be married to. The trouble had been their spectacular skills in miscommunication up until recently.

When their meal was finally ready he was pleased to have kept the conversation going with the same light tone and not a single argument yet. By the time he had served two generous bowls and sat down with the drinks Madara poured for them he was feeling more optimistic about the future than he had in half a year. With just a little extra effort it seemed they were able to get along after all, which gave him hope for the things he had been groomed to wait his entire life for.

A happy home and a partner to lean on when the days were long, what more could anyone ask for in life? If he tried hard to keep things moving as they had been lately he, too, might have those things. Watching the smile on Madara's face as they circled back to a happy discussion of why cats were far superior to dogs, seeing the languid way he sat in his chair as though they had no reason to be ill at ease around each other, Tobirama thought to himself that for the first time since their wedding he could finally see the man who might someday become a proper husband.

[spiftynifty]

TeeVee Podcast’s Voltron s8 review

I’ve been waiting eagerly for TeeVee’s review of s8. If you recall, their s7 review was what gave us the man getting choked up about Shiro’s relationship. 

The link to the podcast is here but if you’d prefer a sort of transcript, here are some of the highlights for me. I didn’t always catch who was speaking but I wrote down initials where I could. S=Shanon, A=Antony, M=Moises, C=Chip D=Dan. The panel is divided on their feelings on the season. 2 of them seem to have hated it, one liked it, one thought it was fine, and one feels mixed about it. Anyway here we go, some great quotes ahead. 

Under the readmore cuz it’s long. 

S: "After 7 seasons of a show that was going to be one of the animated series of the decade, they not only did not stick the landing, they fell on their butts, rolled off the mat, off the lines, into the judge's table and their leotard popped open"

"A lot of the plot was callbacks to things from seasons ago that we really probably didn't need to see again." "I wasn't entirely sure that they weren't gaslighting me."

Man Shannon is calling out some great points. She's calling out the dropped druid plot thread, and wondering what the point was of showing Lotor's past when he's dead, and nothing can change in his present and his redemption can't really happen.

A: "endings are hard. I was disappointed with this season [...] it was let down by poor plotting and that final battle made me throw my hands up in despair most of the time. But I have enormous sympathy for the EPs. Maintaining a longform episodic story is hard. And to pull off an ending that satisfies even MOST of the audience is harder yet. and let's not forget they were always upfront that vt always had 'editorial interference' from up top. Toys, the fact that it's aimed at children, corp resistance to some of the more modern social issues that they've tried to tackle. THAT SAID, we don't know what happened on this production, who had the final say, what they argued over. and I say this cuz a lot of the fandom drama over it assumes a LOT over how media and entertainment like this is made that simple ARE. NOT. TRUE. Some of the stuff I've read has been ABSURDLY offbase, like that there were different writers rather than just 1 the whole way through which ignores how TV is made. And if you think these writers just go off and write a script without talking to anyone first and then they come back with something that must be filmed without any changes, THAT'S NOT HOW ANY OF THIS WORKS. [..]we don't know who made these decisions. The studio isn't always the bad guy. Sometimes they rescue things that would otherwise have been a horrible mess. And unless you were IN THE ROOM, you don't know, and neither do any of us. So let's all bear that in mind. [...]You can't lay the blame OR credit on any one person. For any of this." 

They're laughing & making so much fun of the final 3 episodes and how baffling they were. 

"Don't even get me started on Voltron merging with Atlas [and the crew disappearing] that was a bad, bad idea." 

"But that was the ONE time Shiro was back with the team!"

a couple dudes are relatively ok with the Allura death because we've never seen a WOC heroically sacrifice herself for the universe and usually it's the Shiro hero character D: They also point out that technically she wasn't fridged so.. yay?

Antony and Shannon vehemently disagree. 

A: "My problem with that ending was more just that it was... not. good." he makes a comparison to RotJ where Vader still dies and it's his SON, who lives, who 'redeems' him. "This was none of those things. It felt like a terrible lesson. You can be so evil that you kill literally billions of people for 10k yrs but if you say sorry just before you're about to be executed it's alright, dw about it, we'll put the universe back to rights. NO, that's a terrible lesson!!"

S:"They had the LIONS. That's my problem. Throughout this series we've had stakes going up but there has always been a trading of ideas, what can we do, what can we figure out, up to the point where they wind up sacrificing the castle, but they go through steps before that 'is there anything else we can do’. And here, there's not even... she didn't even get to say goodbye to Coran! This is the one character, WOC, and she has sacrificed throughout this entire series. She lost her planet. She lost the last connection she had to her father in the AI. She kept LOSING things over and over to the point where she sacrifices her crown to help Shiro. and the thanks she gets is that she has to turn around and say nope I've got to away and fix all of this and apparently never see you all again. It really, REALLY REALLY bothered me. All of my friends who have CHILDREN who watch this show, universally the kids were upset and angry and tearful and HATED that outcome. This did not feel like a triumph. Having to lose Allura like that robbed any kind of triumph in the success of saving all the universes. And I think that's one of the reasons that this last part of the season sits so poorly with me. I feel like it should have ended in a triumphant way. even if it meant losing a couple of the team members or the lions. Of course that takes away the toy aspect which is why that's not an option. We already had several tragedy arcs in this series. Zarkon, Honerva, and Lotor had tragedy arcs. Why does Allura have to have one too? We've had enough." 

Antony & Shanon KILLIN IT on this podcast y'all.

C: "This series relies so much on 'oh wait, there's a new upgrade', 'oh wait, there's this new thing'" A: "Well that was the entire final battle." C: "So there's this handwavy Allura has to sacrifice herself. The heavy lifting wasn't done to make this an earned moment."

S: "I do think, whether it was at the direction of DW or WEP (Vld IP), without those little epilogue cards, there is the potential opening that Allura might be able to return.[..]It was open to interpretation."

One guy likes the Shiro ending for the surprising progress aspect, even though he's not thrilled about how it was put together. also he isn't convinced the epilogue wasn't planned. He likes a lot of s8 but all the stuff he likes is tied to stuff that he really didn't like.

S:"The shiro card is the other reason that I think those things were shoved in. For me, that turns Shiro's entire character into a token when he wasn't before. When they introduced his sexuality, it was done BEAUTIFULLY. There was this conversation with his significant other a mature relationship that ran into its problems and therefore couldn't happen anymore. Adam could've been Adele, and nothing would have changed about that conversation. It was not the defining characteristic of Shiro. It was just something else about him."

S: "And then s8 happens and Shiro is divided from everybody on the team. There are so few interactions of any kind that aren't just barking orders. or making plans. Keith is the prime example. Their friendship had been a backbone of this series and suddenly they can't even stand more than feet 5ft from each other. 

A: “It’s barely evident, yeah.”

M:”And the same with the rest of the main cast. And if they had set that up at the end of s7, that he’s going to go into the background a bit, it wouldn’t have felt as weird.

S: “And they didn’t! S7 was miraculous in the fact that even though he’s no longer in a lion, he’s still got a vital part to play in the series. And s8 erased that. It pretty much neutered him! And the kind of message is once you've revealed this character to be gay, we've gotta keep him out of the way. And if they had not put those end cards in, again the fact that he's a gay man is just the fact that he's a gay man and it's not any bigger or smaller aspect of his character, but they did not EARN him marrying random bridge crew member #3."

A: "and RETIRING! A man who LEFT adam because he felt he had to go and fight."

A: "He left the guy he loved before because of his devotion to"

S:"To fighting to making things right"

A:”To being a soldier and doing the right thing.”

C:”Isn’t the whole point then that he achieves that?”

M:”The fighting’s over and he can leave that behind and he can actually be happy.”

S: “He wouldn’t’ve. I don’t see it.”

M: “I violently disagree.”

C: “I think it was a nice endcap for his character."

Moises also likes this because it’s not a BYG scenario and he gets retired. Shannon is extremely exasperated by these takes. 

S:”For me, it’s like Tangled. You go through Rapunzel and Flynn, going through their adventures, getting closer, getting to know each other, they save each other, things like that. And then she’s reunited with her parents and then we get and endcap that says ‘for political reasons her parents decided they needed to marry her off to the prince in the next county, sorry’. That would’ve had people RIOTING. Thats not how you do a story with characters that people care about. And to shove shiro off onto this random character that we--his name is never spoken!”

A:”No he had like 3 lines in the entire season.”

S:”He had 3 line sin the season, you don’t know his name unless you watched the subtitles, and in the audio narration for the visually impaired, they called him Adam in the endcap. They called him Adam! They fixed that now. It feels like a hugely clumsy attempt to grab the woke points for a character that didn’t need them.”

Moises then talks a little about Shiro and Keith and how he and Shannon both thought there was something there, and still do, but they can’t know what happened behind the scenes and to theorize on the intent of that relationship is “conspiracy theory land” and trying to decide what the writers were prevented from doing is like “reading tea leaves and chicken bones”. He references people extracting things from his own writing. 

M: “As much as I wanted to see that relationship flower and flourish, the fact that it didn’t, look, it’s one of a million times that’s happened for me, with fiction, where things didnt turn out the way I wanted to see them.”

S:”I’m talking about 2 different things, as far as Shiro’s character, vs shipping  issues. I feel Shiro’s character was done a disservice that if they were going to end him in a relationship with another man, they didn’t earn it by throwing that little endcap on.”

M:”Yeah, they could have brought back one less robeast or something.”

S:”The other thing is, I think there is enough out there as far as interviews with JDS and LM to show that at the very least I think they meant to leave it openended. Again  if you take out that endcap, the last shot includes a shot of just Shiro and Keith, together, same screen, looking up as the lions go away, without saying anything further. I know I pie in the sky hoped that they were gonna kiss this season when we did our s7 recap and yes that was the shipper in me talking. I truly did not expect that they would be able to go that far. What I did not expect was for them to tear it down. And I feel like that’s what they did. Between the complete absence of interactions in s8, and then throwing that epilogue in there.”

Dan doesn’t understand how that could be because he sees no reason for them to do that. Shannon patiently explains about DW’s history with LGBT characters but Dan insists that the creators told the story the way they wanted to and he’s fine with Shiro getting a marriage even if it’s a character they don’t know. 

Overall the panelists love the show still, and in most cases prefer to consider it in the realm of s1-6 with a weak final double season (7&8) or that the show ends after s7. They would all love to know how long the NDAs last, a making of perhaps, to know what the heck happened and what changed along the way. Big mood my dudes. Big mood.