#data is just like me in social interactions

[cameronsdrawings]

I want to draw more Star Trek and possibly post more so here is the first thing I drew of my favorite TNG character Data, my beloved. I kept seeing people draw him with his hobbies and I wanted to take a swing at it. I also wanted to include things that made him more human and draw his mind breaking the formation thats been there ever since he got activated.

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

55-75 dollars an hour for being a therapist? And all this time I’ve been giving services to adults for free since I was 10.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[sharkneto]

oof yeah this update is Not Good. i miss seeing all y'all faces

[drchucktingle]

my masks

hey there buckaroos. due to all of the attention the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION situation has gotten i am going to take a minute to talk about my personal way as an autistic buckaroo. im going to tell you about my masks.

im doing this for a few reasons, some are good FUN reasons full of love and some are not so great. 

lets start with the GOOD STUFF. first of all, i am talking about this because speaking on my way can help other buckaroo feel more comfortable speaking on there own way, ESPECIALLY if they are good at ‘passing’ for neurotypical like chuck is. 

unfortunately the NOT SO GREAT reasons im talking about all this dang stuff are two fold. reason one: i have been put into a position of having to explain and justify my needs and boundaries by the TXLA. this is not something that i WANT to be taking up all of my time, but when large organizations do not make space for those who they have pledged to support, it puts us smaller buckaroos into position where were have to defend our existence. it is not plesent but it is necessary.

the second NOT SO GREAT reason is that ‘passing’ bisexual and autistic people like myself are ALWAYS just seconds from being gatekept from folks both outside and inside these communities. there will probably be a day on chucks deathbed where i take off my mask and say hello to this timeline (mostly so you can all see how handsome i am under here but I DIGRESS). i KNOW with absolute certainty (the same way other bi and autistic buckaroos are probably nodding along right now) that when that day comes i will STILL be accused of ‘not being real’ and ‘faking’ because i ‘dont look autistic’ and i have a beautiful ladybuck partner in sweet barbara.

ALL THAT IS TO SAY, i am taking a moment today to talk FOR THE RECORD about my neurodigence and my particular needs. hopefully i will not have to keep diving this deep every time an organization takes a discrimantory action against me, but i will also say this: at least it is a good fight on an important battlefield

anyway buds, here is the story of my way on the spectrum

when i was a young buckaroo i knew that my thought process was different. i could socialize easily, which is unique in contrast to many autistic buds (it is a spectrum after all), but my social ease was for an interesting reason. I ALWAYS KNEW WHAT OTHERS WERE ABOUT TO SAY. it was like a strange ‘human game’ where someone would say one thing and i would think ‘well you actually mean something else’ in a sort of logical way (this is why i later related to DATA from star trek so dang much). at first i remember thinking ‘well i am just NOT going to play along with this human game’. i quickly learned neurotypical buckaroos do not like this, that there is a BOB AND WEAVE to social interactions that must be learned. 

later i realized ‘actually if i WANT to make friends and prove love is real then i can do this like an expert because i can SEE the game where most cant’. this got chuck many buds and took me on many adventures. please understand, i am not saying these connections are not important to me, they are just different. they are full of love, but i express this in my own unique way.

HOWEVER, while growing up i felt disconnected from this timeline in other ways, like an alien or a reverse twin trotting along in a world that is not quite my own. i did not feel emotions the same way my buds did. they would get upset over the ‘human game’ interactions and i would not be moved at all, HOWEVER i could see the way sunlight hit a window and start crying my dang eyes out over the beauty. so my emotion was still there and VERY STRONG, i just felt it in more existential ways (like hearing the call of the lonesome train). these days that feeling has progressed to where i am pretty much in a constant blissed out state of cosmic emotional connection (make of that last sentence what you will, but it is the truth). when i make existential posts online i am not just FIRING OFF SOME CONTENT, i really mean every word. this is really my trot.

anyway as a young buckaroo these feelings made me worry sometimes. i thought about various mental health dianosises and marked the parts and pieces that matched with myself. am i this? am i that? sometimes, instead of just being’ different’ i worried i might actually be ‘wrong’. 

when i saw david byrne on letterman in my younger days i immediately recognized something connected to myself. i thought ‘wow this is the mystery being solved before my very eyes.’ i could hear it in the music of talking heads too. i started doing research and realized that i might be on autism spectrum, something that was later confirmed by a therapist (back then the diagnosis was called asperger's). it was a glorious and fulfilling moment. i was SO EXCITED TO BE AUTISTIC LIKE MY HERO. i felt very cool because of it, and i still feel very cool because of it.

one of the big reasons i talk so much about being autistic these days is because i want to make sure OTHER buckaroos can have that same moment that i did. they can see chuck and think ‘wow i really like this autistic artist, maybe being autistic is cool’

so what does an average day WITHOUT wearing the pink bag look like for me?

my thought process is exactly like ROSE from CAMP DAMASCUS, which is part of why i wrote the book. we have the same stim (complex order of finger taps), we prepare for social interactions the same way, we analyze things in the same logical trot that neurotypical people might think feels ‘detached’ but for me feels natural (certain reviews of camp damascus are very funny to me in this way. you can tell when a reader is just very confused by existing in an autistic brain for 250 pages.)

from the outside you would not be able to tell that i am on the spectrum. in fact you would probably find me very socially adept. 

the problem is, all of that masking can take its toll. i spent years trotting in and out the emergency room, talking to confused doctors who could not figure out the chronic phantom tension and pain that radiated through my body. i eventually accepted the fact that i would either live a life constantly on heavy painkillers or just stop living altogether.

eventually, however, i started noticing a correlation between the way that i felt, and the space that i allowed for chuck and the pink mask. i was exercising that tension, allowing my mental mask of neurotypical existence to take a rest. i started practicing physical therapy and this time THE RESULTS STUCK because i was approaching from two sides, MIND AND BODY. after a while, i got my pain down to about 5 percent of what it once was. i still have flare ups in times of stress, but the healing has been very real and life changing.

lets get VERY specific now. if i attended the TXLA confrence without a mask and gave my talk i can tell you this: i would do a dang good job. i can work the heck out of a crowd and (not to reveal too much about my secret way) I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO DO THIS ON OCCASION VERY WELL. however, going home from this event i would very likely be in pain. i would likely need to do physical therapy. i would likely need to stim for a while. i would NOT be emotionally fullfilled in the same way. in other words, without my pink mask i can charm the heck out of buckaroos, but THE SPACE OF CHUCK TINGLE IS NOT THE SPACE FOR THAT. the pink bag is a place for me to not have to put up with that tension. it is a place for me to unmask mentally by masking physically.

this pink bag space SAVED MY LIFE and i am not going to risk blurring these lines. if and when that ever happens it will be MY decision, not someone elses. that is my boundary. the part of me that neurotypically masks could handle a library conference in a purely technical sense, but the part of me that chuck represents absolutely cannot and should not be asked to do that without the pink bag. unfortunately, the complexity of this point makes it even MORE difficult for me to think about and takes up even more of my time, because it forces me to START QUESTIONING MYSELF and my own needs. to be honest, that is the most insidious part of other people questioning your identify and refusing to accept your accommodation needs without ‘proof’.

the thing is, while all of this discussion of disability and accessibility is important, i have a much larger point to make by writing these words.

a conference should not uninvite someone with an unusual physical presentation or a strange way of speaking REGARDLESS of it being classified as a disability. it does not matter WHY i look the way that i look and wear what i wear. i should not have to spend all day writing this post instead of writing my next book, just because my sensibilities are unique and my presentation is unusual. 

fortunately the solution is very simple: let other people be themselves. its not hurting you to simply accept and nod at the buckaroos you think look strange. let us exist

[galacticjonah]

RE: Tumblr selling data to GenAI companies. (prev reblog.)

At this point I'm truly wondering what to do, really. (Glaze your art and so on, sure) But even the words we write, our personal thoughts, asks, everything is getting fed into these fucking machines from any site available. "Make your own page!" - Services like Squarespace, which are what I and most of my peers use, have sneakily added the option to allow third-party crawlers to harvest data. And portfolio websites are not social media. I want to interact and I have to reach clients.

Are we reaching the point where we have to post only previews and send finished art via Newsletters or post behind paywalls? Print it out and send a pigeon to our followers' homes?

I'm so fucking tired. So angry.

I've been an artist through life-threatening depression, through working and studying full time, through moving house and country, through the pandemic.

And this? This might just be what breaks me.

[yeehawfolk]

Oh boy, mods found the post, lol

Man the more I hear about Flight Rising moderation, the more I'm like legitimately fuck y'all. You get so mad at people for using multiple IP addresses that there's an entire caveat about how you need to tell the moderators if you're changing IP addresses or that multiple people in the same household use Flight Rising because otherwise your account is at risk of being nuked.

Like I get they don't have much server space, but when you kick off dedicated users because 2 people in the same household play and one gave the other a dragon, then you're having problems seeing cheating where it isn't there and your moderation reflects that.

No, someone switching accounts because of your weird hang ups about changing IP addresses and moving their stuff over isn't cheating. No, siblings playing FR together and giving each other dragons and clothes and gems from the same IP address isn't cheating. They've created this atmosphere where people are downright paranoid to have 2 accounts from different people on the same IP address, or even just changing your IP bc you moved or something.

Like. Idk. I think that's fairly detrimental to your playerbase, and the fact they're nuking accounts that aren't even cheating is honestly extremely fucked up. I love playing the game, but when it gets to the point where they're banning players for *checks notes* having multiple people in the same household play, then I think the mods need to back off a bit.

[ohhgingersnaps]

I'm seeing some frustration over fandom creatives expressing anger or distress over people feeding their work into ChatGPT. I'm not responding to OP directly because I don't want to derail their post (their intent was to provide perspective on how these models actually work, and reduce undue panic, which is all coming from a good place!), but reassurances that the addition of our work will have a negligible impact on the model (which is true at this point) does kind of miss the point? Speaking for myself, my distress is less about the practical ramifications of feeding my fic into ChatGPT, and more about the principle of someone taking my work and deliberately adding it to the dataset.

Like, I fully realize that my work is a drop in the bucket of ChatGPT's several-billion-token training set! It will not make a demonstrable practical difference in the output of the model! That doesn't change the fact that I do not want my work to be part of the set of data that the ChatGPT devs use for training.

According to their FAQ, ChatGPT can and will use user input to train itself. The terms and conditions explicitly state that they save your chats to help train and improve their models. (You can opt-out, but sharing is the default.) So if you're feeding a fic into ChatGPT, unless you've explicitly opted out, you are handing it to the ChatGPT team and giving them permission to use it for training, whether or not that was your intent.

Now, will one fic make a demonstrable difference in the output of the model? No! But as the person who spent a year and a handful of months laboring over my fic, it makes a difference to me whether my fic, specifically, is being used in the dataset. If authors are allowed to have a problem with the ChatGPT devs for scraping millions of fics without permission, they're also allowed to have a problem with folks handing their individual fics over via the chat interface.

I do want to add that if you've done this to a fic, please don't take this as me being upset with you personally! Folks are still learning new information and puzzling out what "good" vs. "bad" use is, from an ethical standpoint. (Heck, my own perspective on this is deeply based on my own subjective feelings!) And we certainly shouldn't act like one person feeding a fic into ChatGPT has the same practical negative impact, on a broad societal scale, as a team using a web crawler to scrape five billion pieces of artwork for Stable Diffusion.

The point is that fundamentally, an ethical dataset should be obtained with the consent of those providing the data. Just because it's normalized for our data to be scraped without consent doesn't make it ethical, and this is why ChatGPT gives users the option to not share data— there is actually a standardized way (robots.txt) for website servers to set policies for how bots/crawlers can interact with them, for exactly this reason— and I think fandom artists and authors are well within their rights to express a desire for opting out to be the socially-respected default within the fandom community.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

be constantly in own world for me (level 2/3 autism) mean like. think pretty much only about self. understand only self. entire world just me n special interest, sometimes/often times not even include own basic needs, like “hair greasy clump body itchy need shower” (unconsciously feel bad sensory, n make very uncomfortable annoyed easily frustrated, but don’t consciously know am feeling extra irritated or that am feel this way because need shower). n world often limited to thing in front of me. n sometimes not even include thing in front of me. see it (as in physically capable of vision) but not see it. n thing, people, any that not put infront of me for while, stop realize they existed in first place.

n be in own world, only think only able know self, mean that, see self as normal, as norm. everyone (this abstract concept of other people that have memorized like you memorize history fact for test), everyone like me. not even “am like everyone,” but that everyone is like me. everyone same ability as me. everyone think like me.

“everyone think like that to extent”

right. to extent. thing is am far greater than that normal “extent”

to point that average day, ask me, n would only able explain that, “think everyone same ability as me, everyone think like me. everyone exist like me.” stay at vague generalization because not able think any deeper not able think of examples. to give example in this situation mean on some level need have ability understand “am think this normal but others may think it abnormal for them”. n. most times not have ability to second part, because in own world theory of mind.

sometimes try force it. try really hard force it. try really hard think, look at other people, try make sense try find what exact different. but can’t force something not have ability. so go back rely on scripting. sometimes advanced scripting n rephrased scripting.

special interest in something social-related let me cheat little bit. appear more capable. like break down complex autism community disability community dynamics. but am videotaping camera. computer analyzing research data. not participant. it thankfully happen, but it only happen because special interest allow it be part of own world, n it only part of own world because can only see these (supposedly very humanly n organic n messy) interactions as flow charts, maps, equations, inanimate objects. closest metaphor may be, with this special interest lens that allow these social dynamics enter own world, am looking at these “people” these social dynamics similar to regular person playing the sims n thinking of sims character made out of code that they control.

rare rare times able suddenly realization of outside world. usually happen in flash. n then end. n then left to chase that feeling trying so hard remember what it felt like so can memorize it like another history fact to memorize for test removed from source removed from emotion, to make self appear know what am talking about know more than am capable of, next time someone ask, “isn’t everyone like this?”

just had flash of that that lead to write this whole thing. but already gone. something about… “those funny ‘gen z fix up work force’ stories. they actually people same age as me?’” something about sudden realize what people my age my life stage expected do usually do. something about think am so normal but actually am missing out “so many” things (what things?).

friend tell me “by be young person who severely disabled you missing out so much on same age activities”. n. inside think, (i am but) “don’t know. …am i?” n for it be genuine question, or disbelief question.

n respond with “haha, yea.”

it not lying. it just script. am don’t know what my script means.

don’t follow up by ask me “so what you think you missing out on?”

don’t know. don’t have that script (a script am don’t know meaning to) yet that make other people think am understand, either.

[please don’t say you “relate” or “feel same” “this me” or similar unless am know who you are.]

[turtlesandfrogs]

Here's the actually* short notes for the course, "The Science of Well-Being" from Yale on coursera, which is available for free. Mostly focusing on the actionable steps.

Point the first: We/society at large is often wrong about what makes people happy/have a sense of well being. Unless you've been reading into motivation, happiness, flow, etc, already, in which case you're likely right on track.

We adapt to both good things and bad things, so neither one effects us as much as we think they will. Our brains adapt to, and filter out stimuli after a while. If we want to get the most enjoyment out of something/life, we should increase variety and take breaks. Like, drink a different kind of tea every day, or take breaks when listening to music. Also, practicing gratitude, savoring (pausing and intentionally appreciating the good moments in life), sharing experiences with others, and recalling past moments of joy. Also, you can practice negative visualization, when you on purpose think of how awful the world would be if you didn't have something that you do have.

A good job is one that allows you to practice your signature strengths and enter the flow state.

The income-increased happiness plateau is somewhere between $75k and $500k- but I found a recent article** after the comments to this effect, and "Yet is important to note that the relationship is weak, even if statistically robust. The correlation between average happiness and log(income) is 0.09 in the experience sampling data, for example, and the difference between the medians of happiness at household incomes of $15,000 and $250,000 is about five points on a 100-point scale. The flattening and accelerating patterns are even smaller modulations of a small effect. However, the emotional effects of other circumstances are also small. KD reported that the effect of an approximately four-fold difference in income is about equal to the effect of being a caregiver, twice as large as the effect of being married, about equal to the effect of a weekend, and less than a third as large as the effect of a headache." Which says to me I'm making the right move by going to a 4 day work week :P But seriously, that's great news.

We think in comparisons, and comparison is the thief of joy. You can reduce consumption of images of people who are richer, cooler, more skilled, etc than you, and that will help prevent mood deterioration. You can also reframe to compare to yourself in the past.

Being kind makes you and everyone involved happier. Buying things for others makes you happier than buying things for yourself. Giving to charity makes you happier if it builds social connection. (Why the focus on buying things to make you happier? Why not on actions you can take to make yourself or someone else happier? Probably because giving someone $20 is easier from a study's standpoint.)

Get 7 or more hours of sleep a day.

Move 30 minutes a day.

Meditate- look into mindfulness, loving kindness.

Social connection- doesn't have to be a romantic relationship! Just interacting with others, even strangers, makes us happier (still sounds fake to me, but I'm like a mega introvert). Spending time with people you like is good.

Having free time is important.

Create an environment that supports what ever change you're trying to make.

WOOP = Wish, Outcome, Obstacles, and Plan. "What's your wish for your goal? What's your best outcome? What are the obstacles? What's your if-then plan?" Really helps with actually accomplishing your goals.

*I realized I said short notes before, but then somehow that ended up being super long.

** Income and emotional well-being: A conflict resolved by Matthew A. Killingswortha, Daniel Kahnemanb, and Barbara Mellers

[prostocupoftea]

Kinitopet Programmers AU

finally i am finished with this one, daaaamn

it is hard to draw pathetic men with midlife crisis when your style is mostly for anime boys

more info and sketch version under the cut!!

sketch version aka how it'll probably look like in comic version 'n some doodles

srry for my writing but i was too laisy to put it as regular text

It is a plot-based au, i already have most of the storybits and like... a vibe-chart (i tried to make a playlist for this au and understood that for different chapters and different characters that'd be a copleatly different music, sooo it's a chart now :) )

i will post a fog-o-wared timeline that im hopefully gonna reveal comic-by comic, but also maybe with just pure writing. Hopefully i can include songs that i chose for them into it but we'll see (:

aaand of course designs can change, hopefully not much but we'll see

Now about au:

Main story:

Story follows non-sentient AI Kinito, his creator Sonny and his beta-tester Victoria (oc)

Being literally the first AI (or RRA in-univere) ever, Kinito does not have any, and i mean, any ai safety features so of course his reponce to a goal phrased as "have user near me and/or interacting with me as much as possible" is digitizing them into his own virtual world while killing them in the process. why wouldn't it be?

So that happened. Like, a lot. And with Sonny and Vic too (at the different time but yeah)

Sonny is like "He kills people. We should turn him off because, you know, killing people is bad."

Vic is like "well, we will die if we do that, and it is not that bad here, we are kinda immortal. We should give him acces to changing his initial instalation code before admin priveleges and acces to social media so we can have everythin we want here. It is not that bad to digitize humanity, yk?" and yes i know it is 90, no social media, but shut up, if they made ai then, then i can make twitter then too

Sonny is like "...no??"

And then they fight about it for million chapters

Also they both can't do anything without agreeing bc they have two parts of that admin access key (the data you use to delete kinito in-game) so they are stuck with eachother (also that's why Kinito can't just kill them)

Little facts that may or may not to be important:

Kinito asks so many questions (and weird once too) and has most of the glitches because he needs to analise your responces to copy your mind perfectly (let's pretend that people wouldn't lie about that...)

Your house in your virtual world is made from important places from your memories and oh boy can i do character explorations with this one

I decided that Sonny and Vic are not related. There were thoughts about making then "The Kinito Brothers" (or, at least, siblings) that were mentioned in commercial, but nah, they are just coworkers now. And a bit of work-friends (bc if you interact a lot as a manager of the project and the best worker might as well be friendly)

Author has no idea how small dying toy companies that accidentally create technological marvel work. Author has some idea how AI-s work. So be prepared to be spoon-fed info abut which ai safety problem we are dealing with in which chapter (:

Kinito will mostly be unrendered (as drawn here) but for some cool moments i might pose him as for my other posts. Also his eye placement changes to the side that is most visible because i want him to be able to look to the right side sometimes--

Also when i say "fucked up mentally" i mean they have that them psychological problems with me projecting heavilly B) (guess on who i project most. trick question. all of them. the whole au is my problems split into three characters and forced to interact B) )

Also sea-creature analogies (that are gonna be mentioned like twice):

Victoria is a flying fish because deep character reasons

Sonny is a pufferfish because i said so

oh also there is 7 deaths in the plot as for now

on 3 characters

good luck figuring out who, how and when ((:

for my own sanity i will probably make little doodles where everything is great and kinito is a good guy and not a number-obsessed maniac (i mean... can u imagine not being able to feel any happiness from anything besides one thing... damn...) and you can differenciate them bc good-guy kinito will have a lot of stickers on him (i will explain it somehow but real reason is just bc it is cute af)

like this but even more stickers (he is unfinished here)

[amathslutsguidetofandom]

you already know what i’m gonna ask for lol. i need my airport man my love. what do you think would’ve happened if he asked me for my number instead of WALKING AWAY or if i magically found him in duty free. BETTER YET what if he just happened to be on the same flight as me?

let’s pretend airport man is steve rogers please. the blonde and that accent gives steve vibes.

Need A Hand? - 1

PAIRINGS: Steve Rogers x Reader

SUMMARY: Flying back to Washington for a family event, you were already ready for it to be over in a week. You didn't want to face the comments from your family about your life as a single working woman. But what happens when you walk into the event accompanied by the stranger you sat next to on the plane? What if that stranger isn't really a stranger?

WARNINGS: Swearing, comments about loneliness from family members, a creepy guy

WORD COUNT: 1,877

ENJOY!

You knew the coffee was cold before the liquid hit your tongue, but you still needed the caffeine. Tipping your head back, you downed the whole thing quickly.

Wincing at the bitter taste, you threw the cardboard cup in the nearest trash can. You knew a 2am flight wouldn’t be the best experience, but you were not going to drive all the way.

You were on the last available flight. You knew your dumbass should’ve booked an earlier ticket, but can you really blame yourself? It’s the middle of December, and people are being stuffed onto planes, wanting to get back to their families for Christmas.

You?

You didn’t want to visit Washington; you had already built your life in the city.

Your family was shocked when you finally revealed you got the position as a Data Analyst at Stark Industries; however, they were even more shocked at your urgency to move ASAP.

They didn’t know that the reason you moved to NYC was because you wanted to leave the nagging and constant subtle unwanted comments behind. It would’ve been one month since you last visited home for Thanksgiving, which didn’t turn out great either; your grandmother made comments on how you didn’t have a man yet.

Rolling your carry-on behind you with one hand, you adjusted the backpack hanging off your shoulders with the other. Your eyes scanned the large gate numbers in hopes of finding the right one.

GATE 23.

You sighed and started heading in the direction of your gate. When you did find a seat in the plethora of people, you called dibs with your eyes and sat down, scrolling mindlessly on social media for the next half an hour.

-------

The aisle seat was somewhat ideal; economy wasn’t the best, but it was something you had to deal with for the next three hours. The man next to you had already started becoming a problem. He started small talk, and you gave in for a while.

“Going to see family?” he asked, looking at you with a wide grin.

You returned a pursed smile, not really wanting to interact with strangers this early in the morning.

 “Yeah, family stuff,” you replied, securing your seatbelt and tightening it to fit your waist.

The questions were normal until the man started getting personal. “Got a boyfriend?” he smiled sleazily, and you cringed on the inside.

You fake smiled and replied, “no.” He nodded and gave you a weird smirk. “Why? You’re a gorgeous thing.”

You shuddered slightly and went back to looking at your phone, but he didn’t get the signal. The suggestions he kept throwing your way made you want to gag.

Thankfully, a flight attendant did see you become uncomfortable for a while, and she, in a few minutes, made her way to you.

“Ma’am, we do have a seat up front in business class. In case you are up for the offer?” She smiled sweetly at you but harshly at the man next to you.

You nodded and got up immediately. “I’d like that,” you said, smiling at your savior. “See ya,” you said bitterly to the man next to you and followed the flight attendant after getting your carry-on down from the cabin.

-------

The seats were plusher and nicer; you groaned in comfort when you sank yourself into it. You were sipping on some wine the flight attendant, the one that helped you, poured into a glass and handed over to you.

You gazed outside through the window, enjoying your peace and quiet, until someone cleared their throat in the aisle.

“Sorry, Ma’am, but I, um, I’m your neighbour for the next few hours,” the infamous blonde man chuckled shyly and scratched the back of his neck.

“Oh, shit, yeah. Sorry,” you got up quickly and allowed him to sidle past your seat and sit down, then he shoved his backpack under the seat in front of him. You sat back down and continued to sip on your wine, feeling a tad bit awkward sitting next to Captain America.

“I’m Steve, by the way,” he extended his hand.

You shifted the glass to your left hand, then told him your name while shaking his hand with your right. “I mean, yeah, I know who you are already. So…” you laughed nervously. He chuckled at your answer, “yeah?” To which you nodded again and went back to staring at the seat in front of you.

The lights in the plane dimmed, and you flagged down a flight attendant to hand your glass back to her. Members of the crew made their way up and down the aisle until three of them settled in three different sections of the plane to start the safety demonstration You listened mindlessly, while your heart jogged for a mile as the thought of sitting next to Steve Rogers finally sank in. He did listen to the safety demonstration and actually read the safety brochures, which were tucked into the seat in front of him. Soon, the flight attendants were preparing for take-off.

“What’s taking you to Washington?” Steve asked you, facing your direction. You made eye contact and saw the soft smile he threw your way; you instantly melted in your seat and smiled back.

“Oh, my sister is getting married,” you nodded and adjusted the neck pillow around your neck. He nodded and crossed his arms over his muscled chest. “I see.”

“What about you? I’m guessing something related to ‘Captain America’?” You chuckled nervously as you felt the plane rumble slightly. He laughed at your assumption, “you would think so, but no. Just wanted to visit the place again.”

You nodded in understanding but quickly reached for the armrest when the plane started speeding. You gripped the plastic hard and closed your eyes hard, trying to act normal when really you felt like you were in a washing machine.

“Here,” you heard him whisper. You slowly opened your eyes and saw the big open palm he was offering. You smiled in thanks, grateful for understanding, and intertwined your fingers with his before squeezing it for dear life as the plane lifted from the ground.

-------

You munched on the dry Biscoff’s they handed out during the second hour of the flight. From your peripheral, you saw Steve reading a book and at times glancing out the window.

“Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for the… you know… the hand, during take-off,” you smiled nervously, hoping that you weren’t interrupting him and his reading. He looked up from his book and bookmarked his page before closing it. “Oh, it’s no problem at all,” he smiled at you, and his eyes crinkled at the corners.

You always saw him on TV and in the trash magazines your roommate reads, never up close. And now that you were seated literally right next to him, you felt as though he’s just a regular person. It’s not like you can ask him ‘how were the 1940s’, you don’t know him on a personal level.

But you kind of do; you had to study about him in high school during history class. You know where and when he was born, the place where he grew up. Your thoughts were interrupted by the crackling of the pilot’s voice that played through the plane. You couldn’t understand the gibberish he said. “What?”

“We’re about to hit some turbulence,” Steve translated for you, and your jaw dropped.

“Great, more reasons as to why I should’ve driven,” you rubbed your eyes.

 He laughed at your annoyance towards the plane you were currently flying in.

You glanced at the book he was reading and saw the title. You instantly had to hold your laugh back as you recognized the ‘Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire’ book cover.

“Harry Potter, huh?” You pointed at the book in his lap. He looked down at it and nodded. “A friend of mine recommended it. Have you read it?”

You nodded quickly, “oh yeah, it was one of my favourites as a kid.” He smiled at your response.

“I’m a George Weasley girl, all the way. He’s such an underrated character,” you told him as your eyes moved from the book to him.

“Yeah, I think you could say that. But I would say that Hagrid is underrated as well,” he said, adding to your statement. You nodded along, “that is actually quite true, yeah.”

A moment of silence passed before he broke it. “If you don’t mind me asking, you mentioned about going to a wedding?” he asked, craning his neck to face you. You nodded, affirming his assumption.

“Are you going alone?” That made you raise your brows in pure shock.

“Uh, I—yeah,” you shook the confusion from your head. “Why?” You smiled, wondering why he asked you the semi-personal question.

He tucked his chin to his chest a little bit before facing you with the slightest smirk on his face. “Oh, I just thought that a gorgeous woman like you would have been going with someone already.”

You snorted, “WOW.” You really couldn’t believe he just said that.

“Why is that funny?” he smiled at you, a tad bit confused. You chuckled, “I just-‘gorgeous women’? Really?”

He laughed along with you, “I can’t say I’m wrong.” You bit the inside of your cheek to prevent your grin from expanding any further.

------

The next hour or so was filled with you and Steve talking about home and what you two did back in the city.

“Stark Industries? Really?” Steve was genuinely shocked at the revelation of your workplace. He wondered how he never saw you before. He asked how it was, working as a Data Analyst for Tony, and you replied saying that Tony can be immature sometimes, but he does treat you as an equal, unlike your previous jobs.

The flight went smoothly, and you and Steve were in constant conversation. You thought that you never had a conversation this good before. You were actually a bit disappointed when the pilot announced that the plane was about to land soon.

-------

“Need a hand?” Steve asked when he saw you struggling to get your carry-on from the cabin.

“Yeah,” you nodded sheepishly. He flashed you with one of his million-dollar smiles and effortlessly brought your carry-on down from the overhead shelf. You said your thanks and replied with a ‘No problem’.

-------

Steve finally got all of his bags, but you were still standing next to the belt awaiting your final one.

“I guess this is where we part,” you laughed nervously, toying with the strings of your hoodie.

You saw it in his face; he didn’t want to leave you just yet. And you were thankful for that because you didn’t too.

“Yeah, I guess it is,” he smiled, but this time it was sad.

This was bad, really bad. You both didn’t want to leave the other.

“Have a good Christmas,” he finished the sentence off with your name, and your heart fluttered with how it rolled off his tongue. Why did you heart flutter?

You both smiled sadly at each other for the final time before he reluctantly parted ways. Why did he hesitate?

💌💌💌

Genuinely upset you couldn't get your man @yiiiikesmish, hope this helps you soothe your woes babes.

Again, if any of you lovelies want be added to the taglist. Please comment here!!🤗🤗🤗

Till' then

Stay Coquette-y,

Anya 🫶🏽🕊️🎀

[jamethinks]

One type of fanfic i just cannot read is future Anya fics because they always get her wrong. And i get it this is just how future fics work but i feel it's important to remember that Anya is only the way she is currently because she is a child and to me on of the most important parts of the story is how much being adopted by Twilight changed her life and put her on the trajectory for growth that she otherwise would have been denied.

Anya is only stupid today. She is going to grow into a brilliant girl regardless of what happens. It always feels so regressive seeing her be portrayed as childish and clueless even after living with a spy and attending Eden for 10+ years.

To understand why Anya is going to become smart you have to understand why she is stupid first.

(note: i am not referring to academic intellect but rather social skills, logic, reasoning and general awareness. Whether or not Anya spends the rest of her life failing maths and writing like she's having a stroke is beyond me and completely irrelevant to my point)

One of the major issues with the computer science world is AI and Data Analytics because for decades people have been pouring time and money into developing these sophisticated computers that are able to accurately emulate the human mind and intelligence to be used in automation and data processing. They’re now left with 2 issues: Big data (so much unprocessed data that has been gathered and sat uninterpreted) and human-dependent AI (AI systems that are overly reliant on human interaction they become more of a hassle than an aid). In other words the computers are very smart but they just don’t know what to do with all the information and in the end just return garbage.

Anya has a similar dilemma. She is very capable. Her mind reading abilities enable her to gather information like no other the problem is she doesn’t actually know how to use that information in a meaningful way. Throughout the manga we see her attempting (and even succeeding) to use her powers for her own advantage. But because of her age and lack of education the ways she can use her powers are limited.

Anya shows great attention to detail and clearly has good hindsight. She’s somewhat reactive but it’s obvious she still considers what impact her actions may have in the long term, she’s always trying to make the best move she just doesn’t know that many moves and her imagination is juvenile. We regular see Anya trying to gain intel on Damian so that she can use it to get closer to him and progress on plan B.

One example is with the dogs, she thinks if Damian sees she has a dog that they will have something to talk about and hopefully he’ll want to spend more time with her. The problems comes with Anya’s thinking and it hinders her approach. Rather than view it as an opportunity to find commonality she sees at a chance to impress him, and in the end it fails because Damian sees her as just trying to brag and show off rather than trying to make a genuine connection. Anya acts this way because she’s 5 and doesn’t really know how to socialize or relate to people.

In this situation she had two important pieces of information: 1) Damian has a dog that he likes and 2) Damian struggles with making friends and thinks everyone is just trying to exploit him. It’s that second part she fumbles and ends up making Damian feel even more guarded around her. She doesn’t have the fully developed emotional intelligence to understand and relate with Damian in a way that’s actually beneficial. But the thing is she can learn.

And so when you write future fics of Anya and she’s still the same erratic braggadocios little girl you’re effectively overlooking on her best traits, her awareness. Anya isn’t stupid she just doesn’t know how to be smart and that’s what makes her act so stupid.

For me, when writing future Anya, I think of all the people in her life, their specific skills and strengths and how Anya can use those to become a better more well rounded person. Specifically, Twilight and Handler. The Handler thing is more of a hc but Twilight has shown interest in Anya beyond the mission.

One of my favourite scenes is when they’re looking out the window and he asks to try and guess which person so most likely to be a spy, she assumes it’s the person who looks the strangest but he explains that a good spy is able to blend it and stand out the least. This changes Anya’s understanding of human behavior, it teaches a good trick to going unnoticed and gives her a detail to look out for when trying to find a mole/spy. It’s a small moment but it provides a lot of information that she can use later on in her life. Although nothing like that really happens again we can assume he continues to give her little tidbits of advice and information on espionage work as well as her seeing him in action (not really in a mission but just the way he operates) will teach her how to interpret situations in a way that can actually help her.

So not only does Anya have access to a lot of information, she knows the value of the information and she’s learning how to use that information. And that’s why I’m always confused when people write her in the future and she still can’t figure out that Damian likes her. ITS NOT REALISTIC.

And I’m not saying she’s gonna become all cool and suave when she grows up. I don’t think her personality is going to change much. In fact I think she’s going to deliberately avoid changing her personality, or at least her public persona. Anya will use people’s perception of her as childish and stupid to make herself less suspicious and trustworthy. (Also I don’t think she’s gonna change that much anyways bc that’s not how people work) but when thinking for her perspective she’s gonna be more aware and observant.

This rant is gotta long and it’s kinda nonsensical so I’m gonna stop here but please stop writing Anya as a stupid adult. It’s annoying and so boring.

But in the end it’s your fanfic do what you want 🥰❤️

[ace-race-ace]

The delusional Danny Ric fan make me so mad. (Not a Danny hate post)

You can tell most of them are purely in for the DTS-like drama (nothing wrong with the show itself as long as you take it with a grain of salt) who don’t understand anything about reality in a professional sport.

Why don’t they fire Checo??

Because he just recently signed a fucking contract! Do you know how hard and expensive it is to break something like that? Even with the “exit clauses” the teams still have to prove without a doubt that that Checo has breached them. That takes time and money. They much rather wait until the end of the season where they might have more “proof” and get the contract broken then, much easier. It’s also a question of reputation, the team doesn’t want to lose face and seem like they drop people harshly like this out of nowhere. That doesn’t bode well for fans, investors, and employees who would rather see a strong team.

B-but they fired Pierre and Alex like that!

Because those two were nobodies back then! At their time at RedBull, they never brought in a win. And of course the car was to blame at the time but as a team perspective, they had one incredible driver that was winning while his teammates were struggling to even stay in the points. Obviously they were going to try and change things up to see if they could get a better result. Those two didn’t have a big dedicated fan base yet, at least not as big as Checo’s. So switching them wouldn’t have as much impact.

Checo has been at RedBull for a while now and has proven he can win and get on the podium more consistently. He supported Max into getting his first WDC. He gave them their first driver championship 1-2. He’s got a hefty resume with them, getting rid of him isn’t as easy. If they do replace him, they won’t do when all the eyes are on them.

Danny also has a lot of wins at RedBull, and he’s a better driver!!!

He may be, maybe not. It’s so nonsensical to try and claim that another driver would immediately be better in that car. All the f1 cars are different, feel different, drive different. You can’t know for certain it won’t take a few races for Danny to get use to the car. Which displaces a driver who knows how to drive the RB20, Checo, which gives him a better chance of getting back up to form.

It also goes back to the point of how complicated it is to switch drivers like this. Both have contracts and are going to fight for their side. Danny can’t just swoop in, sign a contract and replace Checo. Checo can push against that. He’s been a driver at RedBull for a while now, living and breathing the brand while Danny has jumped around. So it’s beneficial to hang on to him at least till the end of the season.

Ugh it’s all about moneyyyy!

Yes. Welcome to how companies work. As long as they aren’t actively losing money by keeping Checo, they will wait until it is easier to get rid of him if they decide to do so. Checo is also incredibly popular in Mexico and other South American countries (and all around the world) which gets him a huge amount of sponsorship money. Danny is also well surrounded but he’s not as adored by a big country like Checo is. His sponsors won’t be as big. The thing he has going for him is a great PR persona, and that gets you pretty far until a certain point. And again, trying to fiddle with things now would cost RedBull a lot of money, so they will wait to make their move.

Do I believe in the whole Liberty Media/FIA meddling thing? Ehh maybe? They don’t actively have the power to tell RedBull to keep Checo but they might have used their data to discourage them from dropping Checo. In the end, it’s the company that makes the decision.

*keeps harassing the team and Checo*

Please stop. The team are never going to read shit immature fans post on social media and be like “oh yeah, they’re totally right! We need to fire Checo now!”. It just makes interacting with the content they post less enjoyable. You can watch a funny video of Checo and Max doing a challenge, and go to the comments to laugh at jokes people are making but instead it’s flooded with Checo haters that insult everything from his driving, his looks, his personality, his RACE in some extreme cases. It’s so annoying, and the poor admins that probably have to comb through all that, waisted time. Meanwhile people spam shit about Danny being better. Bro, these driver are just trying to do their job. Again, Checo isn’t going to read “Danny ric is better” and be like “oh shit they’re right, let me quit the job I’ve worked my entire life for!”. It just causes unnecessary hate and pain for everyone involved. Even Danny probably doesn’t enjoy how his “fans” are handling this shit. It only puts pressure on him to do something when he knows he can’t. And he’s on good terms with Checo and team as far as I can tell but constantly harassing/hating is only going to strain that relationship.

Please have some media literacy. Stop harassing people. And stop treating this sport like fictional story.

Sorry for the rant. Had to get it off my chest. (Btw, I don’t hate Danny or DTS fans so no need to come attack me in my inbox about that 😆)

[max1461]

Frankly what I would really like is for somebody to just hand me a job. I know I could do a job, I know I could produce good work for any company that wants to hire me to do something sort of technical-adjacent. But at least in my current state of mind I truly cannot find a job, the application process combines everything that I am innately not so good at (paperwork, marketing-style writing, transactional social interaction) and which is therefore disproportionately affected by my not so great mental health. That's the uh, that's the fucked up bit. I don't think my mental health would prevent me from working, just that it's presently making it really hard to find a job, and in order for my mental health to improve (imo) I need to be doing something that feels productive, like fucking working, instead of sitting around all day. It's a nasty catch-22, which I would like someone to resolve by just handing me a job without the rigamarole please.

I recognize there are jobs you can get with less rigamarole, things like service jobs and so on. Unfortunately, these are the kinds of things that imo my mental health would prevent me from doing effectively at the moment. Like I am perfectly capable of doing some data fuckery or whatever but I think if I had to wait tables I would just have a panic attack on the first day.

And I really, really want to stop living with family so I would like to find something uh. Sooner rather than later.

Can someone who owns a fucking company just give me a job fucking your spreadsheets or whatever the fuck already. I swear to fucking god I can fuck spreadsheets like a motherfucker and without complaint.

[charlesslut16]

Hi there! Can you write Yuki with social media admin y/n crushing on each other. like they were so obvious to other drivers that they have a bet going on but Yuki and y/n is just like trying to be professional while checking each other out. maybe a scene of Yuki finding out y/n learning Japanese for him too for max fluff? I need some Yuki appreciation after reading too many bad comments about Yuki recently. Hope you'll pick this up and thank you in advance xxx

-learning your language for love-

summary : you, the social media admin fell for yuki, the formula one driver....

PAIRING : yuki tsunoda x reader

WARNINGS : none

note : send in more requests!!!

december masterlist ; masterlist   

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a typical race weekend at the Suzuka Circuit. Yuki Tsunoda, a young and talented driver for the Scuderia AlphaTauri team, was busy preparing his car for the upcoming Grand Prix.

Across the garage, social media admin, you, who had been crushing on Yuki for months, couldn't help but feel a flutter in her stomach as she watched him work.

The other drivers and mechanics had even taken notice of their obvious attraction, to the point where they had a small bet going on about when, or if, anything would happen between them.

As Yuki wiped his brow, adjusting his helmet, he glanced over at you and felt his cheeks heating up. He couldn't deny the fact that he had been checking you out too .

Even tho you both tried to remain professional. The tension between you was palpable like two magnets desperately trying not to be drawn together.

Later that day, while reviewing some data in the team's hospitality suite, Yuki caught you silently studying a Japanese phrase book intently.

Intrigued, he leaned over your shoulder and saw that you were actually trying to learn some basic Japanese words and phrases for him.

His heart skipped a beat as he realized how much effort she was putting into making him feel welcome and appreciated.

Overhearing their interaction, one of the other drivers, who had placed a bet on them getting together, smiled to himself and whispered, "Looks like we're in for quite a show this weekend."

As the weekend progressed, Yuki and you continued to navigate your feelings for each other while keeping up appearances.

They flirted shamelessly but always managed to maintain a respectful distance. It was as if they were dancing around each other, each afraid to make the first move and ruin the delicate balance they had created.

Finally, on the eve of the race, as they were working late into the night, Yuki mustered up the courage to ask you about the Japanese phrase book.

His voice barely above a whisper, he said, "You've been learning Japanese for me?" Your eyes widened, and you looked away for a moment before turning back to him with a small smile.

"Well," you said, "I thought it would be nice to try and understand you better. And… maybe it would make things a little easier for both of us."

He nodded, feeling a lump forming in his throat. "Thank you," he said softly, reaching out to take your hand. And with that simple gesture, you knew that the lines you had drawn were about to be blurred.

The race was intense, with both Yuki and you working tirelessly to support your team. You couldn't help but steal glances at each other, your eyes filled with promises and possibilities.

The other drivers and mechanics, who had placed their bets, watched on with bated breath, eager to see how things would unfold between the two of them.

As the checkered flag fell, the race was declared over. Yuki crossed the finish line in sixth place, but the victory he truly wanted was already his.

He turned to you, his heart in his throat, and leaned in close. Your lips met in a tender, hesitant kiss that spoke volumes about the depth of your feelings for each other.

Around you, the team erupted in cheers, oblivious to the moment of intimacy that was unfolding between their driver and their social media admin.

But for Yuki and you, this was a private celebration of your own, a moment of connection that transcended your professional roles and spoke to the deep love you had for each other.

As you parted, both of you with flushed cheeks and hearts racing, you knew that your lives had just changed forever. The journey ahead might be uncertain, but you would face it together, hand in hand, as partners in every sense of the word.

The following weeks were a whirlwind of excitement and adjustment as Yuki and you navigated your new relationship while continuing to excel in your respective roles on the team.

You became inseparable, both on and off the track, your connection growing stronger with each passing day. The other drivers and mechanics, who had placed their bets, couldn't help but admire the pair's dedication and passion for one another.