#dark!evan buckley x reader

[targaryenluvs]

SHADOW / EVAN BUCKLEY

PAIRINGS: Evan Buckley x Girlfriend!Reader

SUMMARY: Evan would go to great lengths to make sure his girlfriend never leaves.

WARNINGS: Stalking, baby trapping, sexual depictions, obsessive behaviour, invasion of privacy, babying, isolation

WORDCOUNT: 3.3K Words

A/N: Uhm, let’s not talk about this…

Evan was in love.

For the first time in his life he was truly, head over heels for someone. Even he himself couldn’t believe it. His friends all noticed the change in demeanour. The excessive happiness that he seemed to radiate at all time. They couldn’t find it in themselves to be anything but happy for him.

He’d had his fair share of relationships, but of course they didn’t last. Whether it was off on travels, untrustworthiness or a bad connection. They didn’t last. But with you, he knew you were the one. From the way you looked up at him, the way you smiled when he held your hand. You never judged him, dealt with his family issues as well as his own recklessness.

You were perfect, in every way. And Buck knew it. It’s why when he found out you were think about breaking up with him that he found himself spiralling.

He’d been using your phone to text Bobby, to tell him he wasn’t coming in the next day. You’d both planned to have a beach day, since the both of you had been busy lately. After texting Bobby, a text from your friend has caught his eye.

Just break up with him!

Evan could feel his heart racing, what the hell?

So he pressed on the conversation and found his worst nightmare. You’d been talking to her about how you found yourself with less time alone, almost always being dragged out to a restaurant or some other place by Buck. You felt smothered, but didn’t have the heart to tell him. If you’d told him he was being clingy he would’ve tried to dial it back. But speaking about him behind his back? To your bitch of a friend?

It wasn’t right of you. And it wasn’t right of her to encourage these thoughts. She’d met Evan before, multiple times. She always talked about how perfect the two of you were for each other. And here she was, trying to get you to leave him, your soulmate.

So he texted her, on your behalf.

I’m not breaking up with him, don’t text me. I don’t want to see you anymore.

Then he blocked her number.

“Evan?” His head rose from the pillow, looking down at you as you walked into the apartment. “Yeah babe? Everything okay?” He heard you jogging up the stairs, “Maya blocked me, I think. I tried to talk to her on Insta and she told me to screw myself. I don’t know what I did wrong.” Bucks heart hurt at the sight of you crying.

“Oh baby, you didn’t do anything. You shouldn’t be thinking about a friend who can be so rude with no explanation. C’mere.” He held his arms out for you as you settled into his arms, tears dampening his shirt. “I’ve got you, you’re okay.” He cradled your head against his chest. “I— I just don’t know what I did.”

“Shh, don’t waste your energy on her. Okay?” Your head lifted, “Okay…” He could sense your uncertainty, you’d been friends with Maya for a while, almost a year. He knew it’d be hard for you to get over it, but it was for the best. Evan knew what was best for you.

Your boyfriend was acting strangely, to say the least.

He’d been much more involved with your friends now. Always asking after them, what you guys were doing, whether or not Maya came back in touch. It felt as if you couldn’t breathe in their presence without a million texts from him.

Evan ❤️

Where are you right now?

Who’s with you?

When are you coming home?

Home. He always assumed you were coming to his place. As if you were already living together when you’d only been together for five months. Even when you brought it up to him, he’d brush his actions off.

“I mean we’re practically living together already no? What’s the point in you having your things somewhere else when you can have it here. Saves you a trip in the morning baby.” Evan murmured into your neck as you stood in the bathroom. “I… I have my own place Evan. I like having my own place. It’s not just my things that are there. It’s my place.” His arms briefly tightened around you at the sound of your protest.

“I know, but don’t you want to live with me? Be with me?” Buck retracted his face from your neck, his arms circling around your neck as your hands held on to his arms. “I do! I do want to be with you. I am with you baby.” His frown disappeared in a second, replaced with an unsettling smile. “That’s what I thought.” He kissed your cheek before walking out the door.

You stared into the mirror. What the hell does that mean? That’s what I thought? You shook your head in an attempt to collect your thoughts. Did you want to be in this relationship? Where you felt like you were being babysat? As if Buck was your parent, always asking where you were and who with. As if you couldn’t handle yourself, needing supervision.

It took you another month to realise this isn’t what you wanted in a relationship. You wanted to be equals, to rely on eachother and trust each other. The ability to go out and not give your exact location every ten minutes. To not feel as if you have an overwhelming pressure behind you, always looming. Like a shadow.

But it was a month too long. You’d given Evan even more access into your life. He’d sweet talked you into sharing your live location with you. Even your bank account was accessible to him, being able to overlook your transactions. He had keys to your apartment and even his face ID on your phone (not that you knew he had access to your phone).

You’d confided in your best friend. And she’d encouraged you the whole time. She herself hadn’t noticed Evan’s overbearing behaviour, he always handled himself properly in public. Not a single person would suspect him of being so controlling. He was to sweet for that. And even if they noticed his clinginess, they viewed it as a sweet trait.

He loves you so much he can’t breathe without you. Half of his personality had become you. His wallpaper was a photo of the two of you, his password was now your birthday. His pantry and fridge were filled with your favourite foods, even when you weren’t staying over.

It was all you. Evan finally had someone to love, to spoil and to hold with all his might. He’d be damned if someone tried to take you from him. So when he used your phone to call an Uber since you’d both walked to the restaurant, imagine his surprise and anger in finding another friend of yours against him.

Y/n: I think I’ll tell him tonight, at his place. Somewhere he feels comfortable and won’t be embarrassed.

Rebekah: Good idea, I hope he takes it well. I don’t think he means to cling in all honesty. Might just be a subconscious decision since he hasn’t had many long term relationships. Hopefully he finds someone for him.

Y/n: I know, me too. I just feel so bad, he’s had like two or three girlfriends before me and none of them worked out :(

Rebekah: I know babe, but don’t stay with him out of pity. That’s even worse for him.

Y/n: It’s not pity, I’m not still with him out of pity. I really do love him, but I can’t help feeling as if I have no space. He’s always asking for where I am, and with whom. It’s overbearing. And he seemingly can’t handle me being independent, as if I need him to do everything for me. I’m not a child.

Rebekah: You aren’t, no where near it. I get that you love him, but this isn’t healthy. You both deserve better. Some girls love a guy who cares so much. Wishing you all the best, I have a wine bottle waiting for us x

Y/n: Maybe I can wait to do it another night? I’m having a good time, reminds me why I love him :(

Rebekah: No!! If you keep going you’ll never get away.

Y/n: Pleaseeee??

Rebekah: Breakup sex isn’t a horrible idea. Might soften the blow lmao 🤣

Y/n: That’s not what I meant! I’m gonna go, and am NOT leaving to have sex.

Rebekah: Whatever you say, happy break up day xx 💋

Happy break up day? What a bitch.

If there was one aspect of your relationship that never suffered, it was in the bedroom. And Evan couldn’t help but notice when he was closing your open apps, your cycle tracking app. His thumb hovered over it, he looked around to make sure you weren’t returning from the bathroom. Only a few words stuck out for Evan.

High chance of getting pregnant.

You soaked in the ride back to Evans place. One more night with him, that’s all you were giving him. The idea of breaking up with sounded alright over text, but actually facing it? Your hands were sweating, heart racing. You didn’t want to let go, but you knew you had to.

Now or never.

Your eyes darted around Evans apartment, soaking it all up for your last time, when his hands came around your waist as he kissed your neck. “A bit eager aren’t we?” You joked as his hold tightened, “Mhm.” He grabbed you by the hips before turning you to face him, “You look amazing, and you smell so good.” You couldn’t help but blush at the compliments, Evan always knew how to make a girl blush.

“I do?” His hands cradled your face, kissing you on the forehead, “You do baby.” Evan’s hands travelled down to your butt, “Up.” He only needed one word, and so did you. He carried you up the stairs, then softly laying you down on the bed.

Evan was swift in taking your dress off, then his own outfit. “I love you.” He spoke as he thrust into you, your hands held on tightly to his hair, “Oh god Evan!” He couldn’t contain his smirk, he loved you like this. An absolute mess, all for him.

“Say it back.” His fingers dug into your hips.

“Ow! What?” Your brain was foggy, Evans words went in and out your ears.

“Say. It. Back.” His voice held no sweetness, it was purely demanding. His pace was brutal, and again it felt as if you couldn’t breathe. The pleasure was overwhelming, you felt so good. “I…” Your heart was racing again, it felt wrong to tell him you loved him.

His teeth bit down on your collarbone, “I love you!”

You shouldn’t have said it back. It was all that you could think about as his demeanour changed again, a lovesick grin on his face as he kissed you passionately. His hands felt heavy on your skin, burning into you. All you could feel was Evan. Your head was hazy as he carried you, bridal style. The water was warm, and so was he.

Evan slid in behind you in the bath, his arms were strong around you. He took his time in cleaning you off, savouring the moment. “You hungry?” He sounded so casual, as if he hadn’t literally bruised you moments before. “A little.” Your voice was quiet for some reason, you didn’t know why. “We’ll have anything you want.”

That night you spent with him was one of the weirdest of your life. You felt safe with him, more so than you felt with anyone else. But you couldn’t shake the memories of prior times. Him literally crashing a birthday party to make sure you were where you said you were. Evan dragging you back into bed when you needed to work. Him telling you to not reach for the top shelf, saying it was ‘too much for you’. Or him cutting up your food.

Everytime he looked at you, you felt conflicted.

Was this what love was? Uncertainty? Through the night you found yourself tired. Your brain was constantly filing through a million thoughts, about Evan, about yourself and your life. You loved him, but would it be wrong to stay with someone who seemingly infiltrated every aspect of your life? You didn’t know, all you knew was that the pizza was amazing and he was snuggly.

So you stayed the night. You’d fallen asleep in his arms halfway through ‘Me Before You’. You’d spent majority of the movie arguing over whether she should’ve stayed with him or left. And whether he should’ve lived to be with her. “It’s not right! He’s miserable! She should be understanding of him wanting to leave! Which she is in the end.” Evan shook his head as he tossed his slice into the box. “You’re so wrong.” You gasped.

“He should stayed for her. He knew she loved him and it was selfish of him to leave.”

“He was miserable Evan!”

“Would you leave me if I lost my ability to walk?”

Well that sentence shut you up quickly. “I—, I wouldn’t. I’d stay with you. But the movie is different, she meets him afterwards. He’s already miserable, and she makes it better, yes. But he knows he can’t give her the life she deserves. So he’s selfless in letting her go. And also, if you wanted to go, I’d support you. I’d be sad, yes, but you’re not happy. And I’d want you to be happy.”

“I’d never tell you to leave me. You’re too good to let go. Having you by my side is all I need.” You remained staring at the screen, unable to move. “Thank you.” Evan raised his eyebrows at your dismissal of his words.

“I love you Y/n.”

You turned to him with a small smile, “Love you too.” And within ten minutes, you were sleeping in his arms. Evan glanced down at you with a smile before pulling out his phone. He typed out the date of yesterday. It seemed like a date he’d need to remember. And it was lucky, in about nine months, he’d be holding a mini you in his arms.

You woke up with Evans arm draped over you, locking you in place. You slipped out slowly, grabbing a shirt and leggings of yours. You’d failed in breaking up with him, you knew you had. Last night had sucked you right back in to the storm that was Evan Buckley.

He looked at peace when he slept. Content. Maybe you could have a talk with him about boundaries. You weren’t ready to let go of him yet. And it was exactly what he was counting on, he’d wormed his way into your life. To the point where you weren’t sure what life was like without him.

Evan kept his eyes closed as you left. Letting you think you’d gotten away without him knowing. Last night was amazing in his opinion, and when you didn’t respond through out the day he surprisingly kept his cool. He had a good feeling about the night, and if he was lucky, you’d come crawling back either way.

The day had been quiet, you ran some errands, completed your laundry. And with only one text for Evan compared to the usual twenty.

Have a good day ❤️

You found yourself smiling at the text. Simple and sweet. Maybe he’d read your mind and was now reeling back? God you hoped he was adjusting his behaviour. And through the rest of the week, he didn’t show up. He didn’t randomly come to pick you up from work, or bombard you with calls and texts when you went out for drinks. You’d become so accustomed to telling him your location that he didn’t have to ask.

You called every day, barely over an hour. Just debriefing eachother about your days and gossiping. It felt as if you were both improving in your relationship. You were lowering your guard, and he was working his way in. He wasn’t being too pushy, and you weren’t being protective.

And it was a new chapter in your eyes. Since he’d stayed that way. You found yourself even happier than usual. Going out with him more willingly, especially to dinners with the 118. In two months, they saw more of Bucks girlfriend then they had in the previous 7-8 months.

And whilst you may not have noticed any changes of your own physically, Evan sure did. He felt them, your chest was heavier, and a slight bump was developing. You’d recently been an avid sushi lover when it came to eating out, and you’d been having cravings.

You’d confided in Evan about missing your period, and whilst he acted concerned, it was probably the best news he’d ever gotten. He’d come home the next day after his shift with about six different home pregnancy tests. And you’d been willing to take them.

His world stopped when each one came out positive. But first he had to gauge your reaction, the relief was unmatched when you turned to him with a smile. “We’re having a kid.” You whispered as he nodded, “A mini you, or me.” Tears fell down your face as you squealed before jumping onto him. He laughed as you buried your face into his shoulder before facing him, “You’re gonna be a daddy.” And he couldn’t help but cry himself.

You were going to be a family.

Evan was outstanding when it came to taking care of you. Anything you needed was in front of you within the hour. You’re tired? Here’s a pillow, blanket and soothing sounds to help you sleep. You’re hungry? Here’s every craving that he’s logged of yours, with delivery on the way. You’re sore? He’s got oil in his hands and eager look on his face, to which you tease him.

“Missed me that much huh?”

“You have no idea.” He whispered before kissing you.

It was a Friday dinner at Bobby and Athena’s when you announced the pregnancy to them. To which you were met with blank stares which eventually erupted into cheers and hugs.

“Oh god, Bucks having a kid before me.” Chimney shuddered as Evan slapped his bicep, “Evans going to be an amazing father.” You smiled as he grinned, “Why thank you Mrs Buckley.” He kissed you before you could react, is marriage around the corner for you?

“Well actually…” Maddie spoke out as you all turned, “Oh my god, are we pregnant at the same time?” Her small nod caused chaos to erupt amongst the home, “Two new additions to the family!” Bobby cheered. Chimneys mind was close to exploding as he hugged her.

“I’m so happy they all know.” You spoke happily as Evan sighed, “I can’t believe she’s pregnant.” You kissed his cheek before holding his hands, “Do we need to have the butterflies and bees talk?” He rolled his eyes as you pretended to pout, and he poked your cheek.

“Can’t believe we’re going to be a family. The three of us, forever.” Evan kissed the top of your head as Athena and Bobby smiled, “They’re going to be great parents.” Bobby nodded along, “Can’t believe Buck’s going to be a father. I remember his first day, and now he has a whole family.” He couldn’t help the slight tears in his eyes.

As Evan stood in the middle of the room he felt happier than ever. He had a family he loved and a family member on the way. He knew he finally had everything the could’ve ever wanted. Especially with the girl he loved in his arms, and he’d never let go.

[megalony]

Don't Touch My Wife

This is a new Dark! Evan Buckley imagine I had an idea for, I hope you will all like it.

I had a lot of fun writing the possessive, jealous streak in Buck with this one.

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Dark! Evan Buckley Masterlist

Summary: Evan isn't too happy to find that someone at dispatch has a thing for his wife. And when they see said person out at a restaurant, the possessive streak in Evan flares up. Badly.

Enjoy.

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A smile flooded Evan's face when he watched his niece trot over to him with that bright grin and her arms stretched out towards him. When she got close, Jee wrapped her arms around his leg and tilted her head back so her grin was beaming up at him with such a cheeky expression.

"Hi girlie," Evan leaned down to hug her and pecked the top of her head while he tried to steady his left arm to keep Lottie perched on his hip.

He felt the two year old nuzzling her cheek against his chest and he was sure she was starting to scrunch his shirt up in her hands like she was making sure he wasn't about to set her down.

"You come play?" She tugged on Evan's hand to try and get him to follow her as she pulled him from the hallway towards the living room.

"The girls will play with you, and I'll join you in a bit after I speak to your mum, okay?"

He let Jee drag him into the living room where his eldest was already sat on the rug in front of the coffee table. The six year old was grinning brightly, waiting for Jee to come back and show her what game they were going to play since this was her house.

Evan and (Y/n) had brought the girls over to see Jee for the afternoon and so they could spend some time with Maddie since they all had the afternoon off. The only one who wasn't here was Chimney since he had been called in to cover a shift at the station.

The girls were all similar in age. Louise was the eldest, being six, then there was Jee who had just turned four, and Lottie was two and a half. They were all close, almost like Jee was one of the Buckley sisters and they all loved playing together.

Jee let go of Evan's hand and went to kneel down next to Louise, while Even looked down to his younger girl curled up into his chest. He pecked the top of her head and began smoothing his hand up and down her back, but she didn't seem to want to let him go just yet. She tilted her head back enough to look up at Evan, but her eyes were drowsy and tired and she huffed.

Lottie hadn't had her afternoon nap yet.

"Are you gonna play for a bit?" When she shook her head, Evan rolled his eyes and peppered a few kisses to her temple and cheeks. "You play, then I'll come and sit with you, okay?"

He crouched down and sat Lottie down with the girls who were both leaning over the table where Jee had some plastic food and a mini tea set. He pecked Lottie's temple again and handed her the pacifier he had in his pocket which she snatched off him quickly. He had a feeling when he came back to check on them in ten minutes, Lottie would be grouchy or on the verge of falling asleep.

"Play nicely please."

When all three girls seemed settled, Evan wandered into the kitchen to find his wife and sister.

"They all settled?" Maddie glanced over her shoulder towards Evan while she grabbed a few beakers from the cupboard. She would sort all the girls out a drink for whenever they wandered through to claim one.

Evan nodded and gratefully took the glass of wine (Y/n) held out to him while she grabbed her glass of juice.

A grin spread across Evan's lips when (Y/n) turned to lean her back up against his chest. Her head fell back on his shoulder and she tucked up against him while he leaned his hips against the counter behind him. One arm curved around her waist and settled on her stomach while he took a few sips of his drink.

He watched Maddie find her glass of wine and clink the glass against (Y/n)'s just to see the way her sister in law grinned and rolled her eyes. (Y/n) was the only one who couldn't drink at the moment since she was pregnant. Plus, it meant Evan could drink and (Y/n) would happily drive them all back home later on tonight.

The three of them stayed in the kitchen with the radio playing quietly in the background and the sound of the cartoons on the tv kept drifting through every now and then. They could hear the girls laughing and clinking plastic cups together, playing their own little cafe, barista game together.

After a little while, (Y/n) slowly pushed up from Evan so she could move around and straighten her back out. She helped Maddie potter around the kitchen, putting a few things away and pouring some more drinks while Evan wandered to peek into the living room and double check the girls were all okay.

(Y/n) found the bottle of red wine and started refilling Evan and Maddie's glasses, but she glanced over to the right when Maddie struck up a new conversation.

"So, have you spoken to Neil recently?" Maddie nudged her elbow into (Y/n)'s arm with a sly grin that showed she was only teasing. But Maddie looked away and put some bowls back in the cupboard, oblivious to the flash of panic that dwelled in (Y/n)'s eyes as she shook her head.

(Y/n) slid the glass across to Maddie while she muttered 'Don't' under her breath. She didn't want to have this conversation. But the unease on her face clearly wasn't enough to ward Maddie off this conversation because the elder woman stuck her tongue out and shook her head in a playful manner.

She was only jesting.

"Who's Neil?"

A shiver crawled down (Y/n)'s spine at the sound of Evan's voice as he wandered back into the kitchen and picked up his glass from the counter. His head tilted to one side and his free hand moved to his hip while he looked between both women, waiting for one of them to let him in on the conversation.

This is what (Y/n) wanted to avoid. She didn't want to let Evan in on this conversation because she knew exactly how it would turn out. She didn't want to make him aware of this, it was better to keep Evan oblivious.

Her head turned in his direction and she saw the intrigue in his eyes as he rose a brow and inclined his head to one side. Clearly waiting to find out who this person was and why they were talking about him.

"No one." (Y/n) shook her head to try and dismiss the subject while she found her glass and took a gulp of juice, but it only made her feel queasy. Her free arm looped over the top of her bump and she leaned back into the counter so she was stood opposite Evan with her yes cast down to her stomach rather than risk looking up at her husband.

"He's one of the new operators at work, he has the hots for (Y/n)." Maddie cast her sister in law a cheeky smirk, unaware of the conversation she had just dragged them all into.

The look Evan gave (Y/n) had shivers coursing up and down her spine and made her want to melt into a puddle.

He wasn't impressed by that.

His steely blue eyes watched (Y/n) closely as she set her drink down and moved both hands to rest behind her on the counter. He noted the way she squirmed and shifted from foot to foot, clearly anxious about having this conversation and that didn't sit well with Evan.

"You didn't mention him." His tone was oddly calm and neutral as if this wasn't starting to rub him up the wrong way.

"Because I don't know him."

She wasn't lying. (Y/n) barely knew Neil, he was one of the new guys at work. They were always hiring new people, it was part and parcel of being in a demanding job down at the Dispatch centre. (Y/n) worked with Maddie, they were both 911 operators and they had seen three new people be sent to their centre in the last month.

Neil happened to be one of them. He was a friendly face and seemed to gel with a lot of people, but (Y/n) didn't speak to him that often. She saw him in the break room, he'd made her a coffee on the odd occasion and they shared a few words. But (Y/n) didn't actually know anything about him except that he used to be a paramedic before he switched to dispatch.

(Y/n) didn't mention him to Evan because he wasn't technically a friend and she didn't know him well enough to go home talking about him or singing his praises.

"You don't know him, but he fancies you? Has he asked you out?" When he didn't get a response from his wife, Evan glanced over at his sister instead.

He put on his best smirk and tilted his head at an angle to get his sister to talk to him. He knew how to worm his way around Maddie and get her to spill all the gossip, they were both bad at keeping secrets and hiding information from anyone, especially each other.

And he wanted to know all about this new operator.

Evan did not like the sound of someone having the hots for his wife, and if this guy had tried to put any moves on (Y/n) then Evan might have to find him and have a word with him. God knows he had told enough people in the past to back off and step away from (Y/n).

She was his girl. His wife. They were married, but that didn't always seem to deter people away from her and it wound Evan up to no avail.

He knew he could trust (Y/n), he knew she wouldn't ever go off with anyone else, but that didn't mean Evan could trust other people. If he heard or saw people flirting with his wife he would make sure they knew to stop because she was taken and she wasn't interested.

(Y/n) looked between the pair of them and locked eyes with Maddie when the older woman pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes in thought.

"He asked you out for coffee, didn't he?" She wasn't completely sure, but Maddie seemed to remember (Y/n) telling her the new guy had asked her for a drink and she had to kindly decline.

Unease pooled in (Y/n)'s stomach and sent the baby kicking up a storm when Evan's head snapped back in her direction and she felt his fiery gaze setting her alight. Her body started to heat up and her skin prickled as she couldn't manage to keep eye contact with him when he was staring at her like that.

"Once, when he first started. I flashed my ring and he hasn't asked again." (Y/n) shook her left hand out in their direction to make her point.

"Hm," Maddie nodded and patted (Y/n)'s shoulder as if she didn't quite believe her, but it was all in jest. "You're the only one who geta a muffin brought in though, aren't you."

(Y/n) swallowed down a groan and dropped her head down while Maddie set her glass down and reached out for the beakers she had filled up earlier. None of the girls had come through for a drink yet and she knew they would all be thirsty by now.

The moment Maddie was out the room, (Y/n) looked up at Evan. She didn't like the darkness she could see pooling in those hazy eyes and the way he stalked towards her had her knees trembling.

She gripped the counter tighter when he stood in front of her, his head angled to the right and one brow arched up. His expression said it all. He wasn't impressed, not in the slightest. She could see his shoulders tensing up before he had said one word and when he leaned forward and planted his hands down on the counter, she held her breath. He was caging her in, giving her no chance of escape. He wanted an explanation and he wanted it now.

"So, you've got a fella at work, have you?" His tone was cold and his words were hurtful.

"No I don't."

She tried to look away but it didn't work very well. Evan reached one hand out and cupped her chin, tilting her head back in his direction once again. They were talking. This conversation wasn't about to end, Evan wanted to know who this guy was and if he had made any advances on his wife.

"You didn't tell me anyone was asking you out or bringing you shit at work. If it's nothing then why didn't you mention it?" His words weren't so much accusing as irritated.

If someone had asked her out at work or started to flirt with her, Evan expected (Y/n) to tell him. Either by mentioning it in passing or telling him someone was bothering her. He felt this was something he should be made aware of. He didn't like being last to know, and he didn't like his sister knowing and (Y/n) intentionally keeping him in the dark about this.

"He asked me for one drink, and I told him I was married and had a family. He hasn't asked me since, he just says hi and hands out the occasional piece of cake he does it with everyone. Evan, believe me, it's nothing."

If Neil was a bother then (Y/n) would have mentioned it to Evan, but it wasn't like that. He didn't pester (Y/n) or flirt with her or constantly ask her out and take no for an answer.

He had asked her during his first week if she wanted to go out for a coffee with him. And when (Y/n) smiled and said she would if she weren't married, he didn't become snotty or annoyed or take it the wrong way. He had laughed and nodded, saying to forget all about it and he hadn't asked (Y/n) again since.

She didn't even speak to him much at work and she never saw him outside of work so why would she tell Evan that someone had asked her out once?

(Y/n) knew for a fact that a lot of women on calls asked Evan for his number or to go for a drink with them and a lot of women flirted with him. (Y/n) didn't care. She knew Evan turned down each and every one of them. He delighted in saying he had three girls waiting at home for him that he loved. He seemed to enjoy turning people down.

"Forgive me for not liking the fact that someone you work with clearly fancies you. I've been to dispatch, sweetheart, and I don't trust some of the people you work with."

It rubbed Evan up the wrong way that someone had made a pass at (Y/n), and said person continued to work with her. What would stop Neil from asking again? What would stop him from starting to flirt and joke around with (Y/n) at work and get too close to her? What if he overstepped the mark?

That was why Evan warned other guys away, so they knew not to even think about getting too close to (Y/n) or starting something they couldn't finish.

"Look at me," (Y/n) muttered quietly under her breath, but when she glanced up, she realised Evan's head was tilted to the side. He was peering towards the living room to check on Maddie and the kids.

With a huff, (Y/n) looked down at herself with the minimal space that was between her and Evan, considering how he was practically caging her against the counter. She reached down and clenched the hem of her shirt and slowly dragged it up until her shirt was rolled up just beneath her bra. The movement gained Evan's attention and had his wide eyes looking between her gaze and her exposed stomach, clearly wondering what she was doing.

"Evan, look at me." (Y/n) reached down and roamed her hands up and down her bump. "I'm pregnant. He might have asked me out before, but no one's likely to ask me out now, are they? You and your boy will frighten anyone away."

So maybe Neil had asked her out when he started at dispatch, but (Y/n) hadn't been visibly pregnant at the time and he hadn't noticed the wedding ring on her finger.

It was different now.

He hadn't asked her out since, and no one was likely to ask her for a drink or to go out with them when they could see she was pregnant. (Y/n) was happily married and she was having their third baby, no one was going to start asking her out or flirting seriously with her.

Her thumb stroked across her bump until Evan moved one hand to cup the base of her stomach that had stolen his gaze for the time being.

When (Y/n) tilted her head back to look up at him, she gasped against his mouth when he stole her lips in a kiss. The touch was so eager that he felt like he was crushing and bruising her lips and he almost bent her back over the counter.

She lifted one hand to cup the side of his face, tracing her thumb along his jaw while she felt his hand roaming all across her bump like he was exploring her body for the first time.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that."

(Y/n) clicked her tongue quietly and rolled her eyes while Evan's lips stayed hovering over hers. "Not everyone has baby fever like you, Buckley."

***

"Fancy seeing you here."

A wave of unease rolled over (Y/n) like the sea crashing onto the sand and her heart thundered in her chest when she dared to turn around. Oh dear.

This didn't bode well. What luck that Neil would be here at the same time (Y/n), Evan, Chimney and Maddie had all come out for lunch together while the kids were at school and daycare. He was the one person who (Y/n) would rather avoid seeing outside of work. There was nothing wrong with him and he wasn't rude or obnoxious or unsettling.

He was friendly. Too friendly, and that didn't sit well with Evan, if anyone was overly friendly with (Y/n) it would raise alarm bells in Evan's mind and get his heckles up. (Y/n) didn't want that to happen today or at any point in the future, she didn't want Evan to worry or get annoyed or overly protective when there was no need.

She forced a smile on her face and looked over at Neil who had one hand stuffed in his pocket and a drink held in the other.

"Hi, how are you?" (Y/n) looped her arm over her waist and tried to keep the smile on her face, but she couldn't help but dart her eyes around the restaurant. She was only stood here near the bar because they were waiting for Maddie and Chimney to arrive. Evan had headed to the toilets and (Y/n) knew he would come over and introduce himself the moment he came out.

"I'm good, here for a few drinks with friends, and you?"

"Family meal." Her eyes darted towards the entrance when the door swung open, but it wasn't Maddie and Chimney arriving yet. Why did she and Evan have to be the first ones here? (Y/n) hated being the first to arrive, but then again, she knew Evan hated to be the last one to arrive or be a minute late.

Neil nodded with that same smile that always looked overly inviting and her eyes stayed on him when he stepped closer.

"So-"

Whatever he was about to say seemed to fizzle out on his lips and (Y/n) tilted her head to the side, confusion plastering across her face. She turned to look over her shoulder to see what had caught Neil's attention, but she didn't have to look. The arm that suddenly secured around her waist was enough of an answer to tell her what- or who, he was looking at.

And the firm chest moulding up against her back had chills coursing up and down (Y/n)'s spine. She leaned herself back against Evan's chest and tilted her head back to smile softly up at him.

He had a placid smile on his face and one brow arched and (Y/n) could see the look in those steely blue eyes that were dragging up and down Neil. He was sizing him up. Trying to see who he was, what he was doing and why he was stood so close to his wife.

"Oh, Neil this is my husband, Buck." (Y/n) reached her left hand up behind her to brush her fingers across Evan's chest.

She could feel his fingers twitching on her waist, as if he was debating whether to hold her tighter and sink his fingers into her flesh or not. He settled on tapping and dancing his fingers along her bump instead while he leaned down to kiss the top of her head.

"Nice to meet you." The bright smile Neil flashed didn't seem to meet his eyes and it didn't change the expression on Evan's face.

That name rang a bell. That was the person Maddie had spoke about last week, the one who supposedly had a thing for Evan's wife. His eyes took the other man in with more interest, his curiosity peaked as he wondered why Neil thought attaching himself to a married woman was such a good idea.

He didn't look anything special, at least not to Evan, and with the way (Y/n) was leaning back into him and melting into his embrace, he guessed she wasn't too eager to be around this guy either. That was good. But it didn't tell Evan why this guy was here and why he had attached himself to (Y/n) while Evan had been gone for all of three minutes.

"Is this the one that asked you out?" His tone was blunt and gruff and his expression showed he was unimpressed as he glanced Neil up and down again.

"Evan." (Y/n) craned her head to look up over her left shoulder and she rose one brow while her lips pressed together. He didn't need to be rude. Her husband simply shrugged down at her before he looked back at Neil, clearly expecting a reply.

"I- I didn't know she was married, at the time. We're just good friends at work, aren't we."

Neil grinned over at (Y/n) and jostled his shoulders like this wasn't an awkward situation. But (Y/n) knew trying to play this off wasn't going to calm Evan down when he was clearly uncertain about the man in front of them.

The joking manner didn't sit well with Evan. They didn't know him; at least, Evan didn't know him and from what (Y/n) told him, they weren't the kind of friends who would meet up outside of work or even exchange numbers. So trying to have a laugh and a joke wasn't something Evan wanted to do with someone they scarcely knew.

He didn't trust him. Evan didn't trust anyone who got too close to his wife; he knew what other men could be like.

"Well you're not at work now, so why don't you run along?" The way Evan ticked his head to the side and how his expression seemed to harden was enough to make Neil's smile fade.

The other man nodded with a somewhat silent huff and he murmured 'catch you later' to (Y/n) before he wandered over to his table. He clearly wasn't wanted to stick around and he wouldn't stay and risk being insulted by a stranger.

Once he was out of earshot, (Y/n) reached her hand down and gave Evan's wrist a squeeze. She pressed her head back into the middle of his chest and sighed up at him.

"You didn't have to be so rude, you know."

"I could have told him to fuck off. Would you prefer that?"

(Y/n) wanted to roll her eyes, but the light tone in Evan's voice and the rather cheeky smirk that lit up his face made her relax in his arms. He wasn't angry, he wasn't getting riled up and he clearly wasn't irritated that Neil had come over. He was rather pleased Neil had listened and wandered off; Evan didn't like it when people didn't listen to him.

And he was right, he could have been much worse, (Y/n) knew that for a fact, but he also could have been a little more polite. (Y/n) still had to see Neil at work and it wouldn't do her any favours if he started giving her the cold shoulder or making snarky comments that her husband was blunt and rather rude on a first meeting.

"Mads and Chim are here, come on, let's get a drink." Both Evan's hands moved to cup (Y/n)'s hips and his lips attached to the back of her head as he guided her towards the bar next to the entrance.

He could see his sister walking by the window, about to enter the restaurant so they could all get a drink and go find a table. No sense chattering about Neil when he had already disappeared and was of no concern anymore.

It didn't take them long to find a table and order their food. They found a booth in the corner of the restaurant in a quiet area and the conversation flowed easily between them. They drifted from one conversation to the next, from the girls, to work, to plans for Christmas and organising a big Christmas meal out somewhere for the entire team and their families.

(Y/n) leaned her head on Evan's shoulder and let herself slouch into his side after they'd eaten. She smiled into his neck, nuzzling her nose against his skin when she felt his arm slither around her waist so his hand could feather up and down her hip and across her thigh.

She loved the fact that the four of them would be here for another hour, at least. They had just finished their meals, but both Chimney and Evan were straight onto the menus to find something sweet to have next, and they would still be sat here for a few more rounds of drinks.

It wasn't often that they got to go out together, just the four of them without the team or meeting up at play centres with the girls. So it was nice to catch up and be together without having to think of rushing back for childcare or work.

"While you decide, I'll get some more drinks." (Y/n) hovered her lips over Evan's ear and pressed herself up into his side. She could see it was going to take a while for everyone to decide what they wanted for dessert, she may as well get them all another round of drinks while they decided.

She felt Evan's free hand move to hold her chin so he could aim her head in his direction, allowing him to steal a kiss from her. He kissed her like he was trying to inhale the air from her lungs and his lips were warm and inviting; he knew his touch was like a spell casting over (Y/n).

"Let me out," She murmured against his lips in between kisses, nudging her hand against his chest to make her point. She couldn't get out the booth unless Evan climbed out first, usually she would have wiggled across his lap to get out. But that wasn't going to happen when she had her baby bump in the way.

With a sigh, Evan retracted his arm from her waist and slid to the left to get out the booth. His hands found (Y/n)'s hips as they swapped places, her climbing out while Evan sat back down again.

"Same again?" (Y/n) looked across at Maddie and Chimney who both nodded in agreement.

She felt his hands squeeze her hips, pulling her closer and she rose a brow as she stared down at him, waiting for him to release her so she could go to the bar. Her lips formed a blushing smile when she felt one of Evan's hands shift round from her waist to her bum. For a moment, (Y/n) wasn't too sure what Evan was doing but she rolled her eyes when she realised he had slid his card into her back pocket.

A coy grin lit up Evan's face as he put the bank card in her back pocket and patted his hand against her bum before he finally let go of her and allowed her to drift towards the bar.

When she reached the bar, (Y/n) arched her lower back out and leaned forward to fold her arms on the counter. It felt better to stoop forward like this and click her spine into place. She angled her head to one side, waiting patiently while the bar tender was down at the other end of the bar serving at least three people at once.

But her head snapped to the right when she felt an arm brush against hers and a body press up close to her side.

Nerves rattled through her stomach and her smile faltered when she watched Neil lean forward on the bar like he was copying her manner with his hips arched out and his shoulders hunched forward. He looked over at her with a grin and his fingers began drumming against the counter.

"Hello again." His voice was so chipper and he was smiling broadly which was a little off-putting to (Y/n).

She couldn't help but wonder if Neil had seen her approach the bar and followed her, or if this was a coincidence that he came over here at the exact same time as her. It seemed like too much of a coincidence and (Y/n) didn't believe it, she knew Evan wouldn't either if he noticed.

She murmured a small hello and nodded at him before she reached her hand out and flagged the barman.

"What are you having? Something non-alcoholic, obviously." Neil grinned and motioned his hand down to her stomach before he started to tap against the bar again.

"I can get my own drinks, thank you." (Y/n) glanced away from him and smiled at the bar man while she slowly shuffled a foot to the left to add some space between her and Neil. "One coke, one juice and two ciders please."

(Y/n) found herself smiling softly when the notion hit her that she wasn't technically getting her own drinks when Evan had slid his card into her back pocket. But that was different, he was her husband and it was still her ordering and getting the drinks by most means, she didn't want Neil to get her a drink. That wasn't necessary and (Y/n) hadn't been wanting him to do that so he shouldn't feel obligated.

"A friend can't buy you a drink?" His voice sounded deflated and he sighed and dropped his shoulders down like (Y/n) had turned him down for a date.

In a way, she wondered if she had. She wondered if he was asking to get her a drink to get close to her, but she couldn't see why. (Y/n) hadn't given him any signs or led him on in any way, and she was out with her family. He must see that she didn't want to interact with him.

"Not when my husband's around, no." She hoped her smile was sincere enough to tell him she wasn't trying to be rude or come off as a snotty cow.

She swiped the card from her back pocket to pay for the drinks, but her blood ran cold when she heard what Neil muttered as he leaned in close to her side.

"He seems a bit… controlling."

How dare he. How dare Neil try and make assumptions and casual remarks like that. He didn't know Evan, at all, he had met him once for a minute. And he didn't really know (Y/n) either. He said hello to her at work, he offered her a drink or a muffin sometimes in the break room. They shared minimal conversations together, that was it. They were acquaintences, not friends and he had no right to make remarks like that about Evan.

He wasn't controlling. Evan was protective; that was the word that always came to mind when (Y/n) thought about her husband. He was always concerned about her and the girls, they were everything to him and Evan was always careful and protective over all of them. Just like he was about the team and his family.

She took a deep breath and pushed off the counter so she could twist to the right and face Neil a bit better.

Her brow arched and her lips set into a firm line as she tried to speak without setting off an argument.

"You don't even know him-"

"I know that he's watching us right now. It's a bit like Big Brother for you, isn't it? Your every move, scrutinised by him, seems a funny kind of love to me."

The way Neil pointed over her shoulder and then made the effort to wave had (Y/n)'s blood curdling like sour milk. She didn't want to look, she really didn't, but she couldn't help herself when Neil had just made a sarcastic expression and motion that would obviously be aimed at Evan.

And when (Y/n) glanced in the other direction across the restaurant, there he was. He was sat on the edge of the booth, one hand on his knee and the other arm planted on the table with his fingers firmly tapping the edge of the table. His head was tilted to one side and his eyes were void and blank. To anyone else, Evan would look like a daydreamer, lost in his own world.

To (Y/n), he looked volatile. She could almost hear his heavy breathing and those dark eyes were glued to her frame and making her feel nervous because she knew what would be running through his head.

"Well that's your opinion, and I'd thank you not to go around judging. My guy's protective, and I love him for it."

He didn't know anything.

Neil had no idea what kind of relationship (Y/n) had with Evan. He had no idea how close they were or how much (Y/n) relied on Evan and how he was always praising her and telling her she was the only person he felt he connected with and could confide in.

Evan loved her, he loved her more than anything and sometimes that made him protective and cautious around her. But (Y/n) loved him, he was the father of her children and she didn't want to be with anyone else and having someone like Neil commenting on her relationship made her upset.

(Y/n) was glad when she looked back to the bar and noticed that the drinks she had ordered were now being poured. In another minute, she could walk away from Neil and leave this stupid conversation behind. And he could think again if he thought (Y/n) would be having civil conversations with him at work after this. She wouldn't be speaking to him at all after today.

"So if I did this," Neil casually slid his arm around (Y/n)'s shoulders, oblivious to the way she tensed and held her breath beside him. "He wouldn't mind?"

He would, and they both knew it.

Reaching behind her, (Y/n) grabbed his wrist and threw it back at him while she sidestepped again to add some more distance between them. Whatever he was doing, it wasn't funny and (Y/n) didn't appreciate it. He was going to rile Evan up and they both knew that. They both knew Evan wasn't just going to sit back and watch.

(Y/n) could of cried when she noticed Evan storming their way. She could see him like a hurricane trudging between the tables, his eyes set on them like he had tunnel vision. With both his hands curled into fists at his sides and his upper lip curling in distaste.

When he walked over, (Y/n) felt like grabbing him and dragging him back to the table, but she couldn't. She knew Evan wasn't just going to walk away even if (Y/n) tried to follow him. He would stand here and argue, right now in the middle of the restaurant. Evan didn't care if people watched or listened in, that didn't bother him at all.

The feeling of Evan's heaving chest pressing into her back made (Y/n)'s head spin and she straightened up when his hand clamped down on her hip. But it was the way his head tilted to one side and how his eyes zoomed in on Neil that made her shiver. If looks could kill, Neil would have dropped to the ground.

"I thought I told you to back off?" His voice was gritty and his words were harsh while he clamped his left hand down on the bar to his left until his short nails were beginning to scratch into the wood.

He didn't really look like he was waiting for an answer, more like he was waiting impatiently for Neil to take yet another hint and wander off with his tail between his legs. Something that didn't seem very likely to happen at the moment.

Neil straightened up off the bar and grinned over at Evan like they were old friends having a catch up rather than two people about to get into a brawl.

"Well I wasn't here to talk to you, I was talking to (Y/n) and she's fine, so you can stand down." The way he waved his hand at Evan was almost dismissive and it was the wrong move to make.

It caused a sinister grin to light up Evan's face as he looked down at Neil in amusement. He really thought he had the ability to intimidate Evan and make him back down. Evan was the one in charge here; he was the one with the power in this situation, and he was the one with the girl. (Y/n) was his, and she didn't seem happy to be talking to Neil so Evan was going to make sure he backed off one way or another.

"Hm, not gonna happen." Both his hands clamped down on (Y/n)'s hips somewhat possessively and he leaned over her shoulder to be closer to the nuisance in front of them. "Now do us all a favour and fuck off."

(Y/n) bristled at the dark tone in her husband's voice and she felt his chest vibrate with each word.

"I think we're both fine, aren't we (Y/n)?"

(Y/n) tensed up when Neil suddenly reached across and held onto her arm. She wasn't sure what he was trying to do, whether he was just holding onto her to rile Evan up, or whether he was about to try and pull her away from Evan. either way, she didn't like whatever intention he had in mind and her arm stiffened in his hold as she leaned back towards Evan.

The last thing they needed was for a fight to break out here and (Y/n) didn't want to be at the centre of an argument. If Neil would just give in and wander off, everything would be okay. He could have just said hello or smiled and left it at that. He didn't need to strike up a conversation and start making comments and butting in where he wasn't wanted.

A gasp broke past (Y/n)'s lips when Evan's right hand let go of her hip and clenched down on Neil's wrist instead.

He gripped so tight that Neil's fingers spasmed and his arm jerked. As soon as he let go of (Y/n)'s arm- although he hadn't been holding onto her with any force- his arm began to shake when Evan thrust his arm to the side harsh enough to set him off balance and catch the attention of the other people around the bar.

"Lay a hand on her again and I break it." His calloused voice was not one to be trifled with.

Evan wasn't opposed to breaking limbs if people didn't listen to him and right now, Neil was getting dangerously close to seeing Evan's dark side.

If he continued to test Evan's patience and push him Evan was going to snap back, and it wouldn't be pretty. But something about this guy made Evan think that this was exactly what he wanted. He seemed rather content to wind Evan up and see how far he could edge this situation.

When he didn't receive a response, Evan moved both hands back down to (Y/n)'s hips and merged his lips with the back of her head. He could see the bar tender watching them closely, wondering whether or not he needed to step in and calm the situation or not. And others were happily watching them, just waiting for a fight to break out.

There was a tray of drinks set down beside them on the counter and (Y/n) reached towards it to break the tension. They should head back to their table. She should drag Evan back towards Maddie and Chimney to calm the situation and end whatever was going on here.

But before she could reach for the tray, Neil's hand was on her upper arm and he tugged just enough to jerk her hand from the tray and get her to turn in his direction.

"You really should get away from him."

The way Neil glanced over at Evan with a snide look was enough to make (Y/n)'s stomach flip dangerously and her hands trembled when she felt Evan let go of her.

There was no time for (Y/n) to move forward or say one word before Evan had swept in front of her.

Evan's name tumbled past (Y/n)'s lips in a shriek when she watched him curl his hand and slam his fist into Neil's nose. The action sent Neil's head surging back with enough force that it looked like his neck had broken and he stumbled into one of the bar stools that stopped him from landing on the floor with a bang.

Both hands moved to cradle his nose that was dripping blood and he groaned, closing his eyes tight but it did nothing to stop them from streaming with tears like a waterfall.

If it were any other situation, (Y/n) would have focused and fawned over the way Evan shook his hand out at his side and flexed his fingers, cracking his knuckles into place that hadn't even broken the skin from the force. His hand wasn't even trembling and he rolled his shoulders and clicked his neck into place like he was only just beginning and starting to fire up. He would have looked dashing, if it weren't for the crazed look in his pupils and the fact that everyone was now crowding round and staring at them.

A hand moved to cover her mouth as she stepped away from the bar and took a step closer until she was directly beside Evan. Her cheek pressed into his bicep and she glanced over at Neil.

His fingers were starting to drip with blood that was trickling down the creases in his hands but there was a fire burning within his eyes that were focused on Evan. He looked like he wanted to retaliate, to throw another punch, but he hesitated.

There was something about Evan that warded him away. This wasn't his first fight over or about (Y/n), far from it, and he wasn't the type to lose. Evan was just getting started and Neil instinctively knew that if he got into this mess any further, he wasn't going to win.

"God, Evan…"

What was she supposed to do? Did she drag Evan back to the table? Did she try and push him outside to get him to calm down? Did she go and get Maddie and Chimney for backup? The only thing she knew she couldn't do was step any closer to Neil.

"Don't touch my wife."

With both her hands now curled around Evan's bicep, (Y/n) pulled his arm into her chest and slowly started to tug him in the opposite direction to the bar. The bartender was now coming around the other side of the bar to evaluate the situation and someone had hold of Neil as if he was going to start throwing punches too.

They didn't need a commotion or a fight, Evan had made his point, that needed to be the end to it now.

"Alright what have we missed?"

"Oh my God, what happened to Neil?"

(Y/n) shuddered when a hand fell on her shoulder but when she whipped her head around, she relaxed when she saw it was just Maddie. Her sister in law stood close to her side with her other hand on her chest as she peered around to see Neil with a blood-covered face and someone forcefully pinning his arms behind his back to stop him writhing around.

"He- he was getting too close." (Y/n) leaned back into Maddie but she let go of Evan's arm when he scoffed and twisted his head to look down at her and his sister.

"That's modest, he fucking grabbed her."

(Y/n) was sure she heard Chimney mutter something about going back to the table before they were all thrown out, and she agreed. She watched Chimney reach for the tray of drinks and (Y/n) tried again to tug on Evan's arm as they all stumbled back in the direction of their table.

She was partly surprised the bartender hadn't tried to throw Evan out or threaten to call the police yet. But then again, he might have interpreted the situation the same way as Evan. He had seen Neil cosy up to (Y/n) and talk to her and he had clearly seen Evan come over to (Y/n) like he was coming to the rescue.

Leaning forward, (Y/n) burrowed her face into Evan's arm and closed her eyes, letting him take the lead back to their table. She inhaled his scent and tried to calm down her raging nerves, but it wasn't working.

How was she supposed to go back to work after this? How would she and Maddie both cope seeing Neil on shift with them?

Maddie was going to give him the cold shoulder and the silent treatment, she wasn't going to be impressed at all and she would now be protective over (Y/n).

But (Y/n) had a horrible feeling that this was going to keep riling Evan up. He knew Neil worked with (Y/n) and that their shifts might line up frequently. He wouldn't trust Neil not to approach (Y/n) and try to talk to her and carry on this line of conversation like he had done at the bar. Evan might tell (Y/n) to put in a complaint at work.

She had never done that before. She had never had any issues or complaints with anyone she worked with in this job or her previous job. If she put in a complaint or raised a concern and her and Neil were put on opposite shifts, he might bear a grudge. He might tell people at dispatch. It would cause grievances and waves at work that (Y/n) didn't want to deal with.

But she could feel Evan's chest rising and falling, heaving with each breath like he was about to explode. He wasn't likely to calm down after this, she knew that, and his protectiveness was going to broaden and carry on even after they went home.

Going to work would become insufferable now.

[st4rgiirll]

「 ✦ 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭 ✦ 」

ׂ╰┈➤ “kiss me, beneath the milky twilight. lead me, out on the moonlit floor”

𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒₊˚*ੈ♡⸝⸝🪐༘⋆ hi all! so i really wanted to do a valentine’s special for you guys, although i started a little late. i’ve tried to find finished valentine’s events and i dont find many so i will try my best to do this. hopefully i can write these in a couple sittings so i can queue the posts for the specific days! thank you for reading!

𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗔𝗜𝗡𝗦 𝟭𝟴+ 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗘𝗡𝗧, 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗪𝗜𝗟𝗟 𝗕𝗘 𝗠𝗔𝗥𝗞𝗘𝗗 𝗔𝗖𝗖𝗢𝗥𝗗𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗟𝗬! 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗔𝗥𝗘 𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗣𝗢𝗡𝗦𝗜𝗕𝗟𝗘 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗢𝗪𝗡 𝗠𝗘𝗗𝗜𝗔 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗦𝗨𝗠𝗣𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡

creds to: voidangxls for the layout and prompts!

key - ♡ for fluff, ☾ for smut!, ✢ for suggestive content, ⭇ for dark content

˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

DAY i. ♡ asking to be your valentine— anakin skywalker x gf!reader

DAY ii. ☾ ⭇ secret admirer— s2!rafe cameron x perv!stalker!reader

DAY iii. ♡ first i love you— s2!jj maybank x gf!reader

DAY iv. ♡ first kiss— s1!stiles stilinski x crush!reader

DAY v.☾ ♡ rose petals— evan buckley x gf!firefighter!reader

DAY vi. ♡ ✢ valentines party— s1!rafe cameron x gf!reader

DAY vii. ♡ heart shaped sweets— s3!jj maybank x gf!reader

DAY viii. ♡ a valentines date— s3!stiles stilinski x awkward!gf!reader

DAY ix. ♡ the letter— anakin skywalker x admirer!reader

DAY x. ♡ slow dancing— jj maybank x gf!reader

DAY xi. ♡ pink photoshoot— frat!s1!rafe cameron x gf!reader

DAY xii. ♡ ✢ heart lollipops— sam monroe x emo!gf!reader

DAY xiii. ☾ blankets— s3!stiles stilinski x gf!reader

DAY xiv. ♡ missing you– anakin skywalker x secretgf!reader

▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။||||။‌‌‌‌‌၊|• 0:10

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ “it started with a whisper, and that was when i kissed her, then she made my lips hurt”

[achilles-rage]

can’t believe quinnie wrote touch tank about evan buckley. crazy. like, yes, he IS so pretty when he goes down on me. gold-skinned AND eager, baby, blue shirt out the laundry (this one).

[notforyounorme]

The not for you nor me Masterlist

These are dark fics and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given! Please DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you in any way. This is fiction, but can be disturbing to some readers.

Marvel

Coming soon

Series:

• It’s already so late (Coming soon) [Babysitter Masterlist]

• I spy with my little eye (Coming soon) [Stalker Masterlist]

•Stack the deck (Coming soon)

• Wound up at your door (Coming soon)

One-shots:

• Feel the bass (Up next)

• Too broke to fix (Coming soon)

• Picture perfect (Coming soon)

• Dew drops (Coming soon)

Coming soon

Series:

• When you gave me all control (Coming soon)

One-shots:

• Too sweet (Coming soon)

Series:

• Gilded (Ongoing)

One-shots:

• You can run, but you can’t hide (Coming soon) [Little Rabbit Masterlist]

• Mind your manners (Coming soon)

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

• The hunt (Coming soon) [Little Rabbit Masterlist]

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

Supernatural

Coming soon

Series:

• Supernatural Rewrite (Coming soon)

• Ominous - Supernatural & TWD crossover (Ongoing)

One-shots:

• Season of the witch (Coming soon)

• Hungry eyes (Coming soon)

Coming soon

Series:

• Supernatural Rewrite (Coming soon)

One-shots:

• You can't hide (Coming soon) [Stalker Masterlist]

• You belong to me, only me (Coming soon) [Stalker Masterlist]

• Blood bank (Coming soon)

• Soul(less) (Coming soon)

Coming soon

Series:

• Gasoline and tire tracks (Coming soon)

• The way you speak (Coming soon)

One-shots:

• Run, Rabbit, Run (Coming soon) [Little Rabbit Masterlist]

• You underestimate us (Coming soon)

• On the count of three (Coming soon) [Little Rabbit Masterlist]

9-1-1

Coming soon

Series:

• It's already so late I (Coming soon) [Babysitter masterlist]

One shots:

• Jealousy, jealousy (Coming soon)

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

• I can see you (Coming soon) [Stalker Masterlist]

Coming soon

Series:

One shot:

• Just another LA devote (Coming soon) [Stalker Masterlist

• Graveyard shift (Coming soon) [Little Rabbit Masterlist]

Harry Potter Universe:

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

• Poisonous (Coming soon)

Marauders

Coming soon

Series:

• Darkest hour (Coming soon)

One-shots:

• Death glares (Coming soon)

The Boys

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

• Say that again (Coming soon)

• You better not (Coming soon)

Bullet train

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

• Martini (Coming soon)

DC Comics

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

• Night owl (Coming soon)

Formula 1

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

• Red (Coming soon)

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

Grishaverse

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

The Gray Man

Coming soon

Series:

One-shots:

[littlemelaninfics]

So, I really want to get back into Dark! Writing..👀 18+ ONLY

That was honestly the whole reason I created this account, to separate my darker pieces from the more socially appropriate, if you will.

I don’t want that to be the focus of my page, but I do think I’ve deviated away from it a bit too far, so I just want to start incorporating it again!

If you have any requests, send the in!

Here are a few examples of my Darker writings:

TRIGGER WARNING

1.) Dylan O’Brien

2.) Steve Rogers

3.) Chris Evans

[gooondocks]

and if your heart wears thin — evan buckley.

writing masterlist | askbox

─── summary: after taking an unfortunate spill on the job, buck's fiancé decides that life is too short to wait any longer.

─── pairing: evan buckley x gn!reader.

─── warnings & notes: angsty angst and then fluffy fluff. near death experience, descriptions of drowning and rescuscitation, brief mention of needles (not graphic), incorrect medical procedure for Plot purposes. no use of y/n. title is from 'beside you' by marianas trench. this starts out with some mild peril but devolves into some of the fluffiest shit i've ever written so. enjoy. not proofread bc i'm lazy.

─── word count: 3.9k.

     YOU SHOULD'VE BEEN EXPECTING IT, is the thing.

     The callout comes about halfway through the shift. Intoxicated male on the boardwalk at Echo Park Lake, bleeding from a head wound, having tripped getting out of one those damn swan boats. Dispatch warns that he’s been hostile and combative to both employees and civilians on scene, and that a police unit has also been sent to assist.

     So really, you should have been expecting it. Aggressive patients aren't exactly rare in your line of work, unfortunately. Hell, this wasn’t even the first confrontational call you attended this week. So you're pretty used to being on your guard on these kinds of calls.

     Except.

     You turned your back for only a second, just to grab something from the medkit. Buck and Eddie are doing their best to coax the patient onto the gurney, gritting their teeth as he hurls slurred curses their way. Hen quietly asks you to grab the pulse oximeter out of the bag, and so you turn, crouching down at the edge of the dock to rummage through the kit.

     You’re not sure what causes it. Why the patient decided to lash out at that exact moment. But there’s a gruff roar behind you and the man flails, edging around Eddie to give you an almighty shove. Crouched like this, your center of gravity suddenly shifts. You lose your balance.

     And then you're in the water.

     Panic floods your body as you breach the surface. It's instinct to gasp for air, except there isn't any; you take in a lungful of the lake instead, sputtering and hacking beneath the water as you try to kick towards daylight.

     It’s deeper than you thought it would be, so close to the shore. You keep kicking and kicking, but your boots never scrape the bottom, nor do you find the surface. It’s cold, too. Colder than you thought possible, in a lake in the middle of Los Angeles. But it’s winter now, you suppose. A grim, chilly February. Most of it has been spent curled up beneath a blanket with Buck, the pair of you ensconced in your cosy apartment.

     The past week has been overcast and windy. And the water is never as warm as the air temperature. Buck laughs every time you run into the surf at the beach, squealing at the sudden, sharp chill of it lapping at your skin.

     How cold can a human body become before it’s dangerous?

     You try to remember, but cold water curls around your limbs like heavy iron shackles, dragging you down. You can’t remember. Buck would know. Buck wouldn’t even have to think about it, he’d just reel off the answer in a heartbeat, and you’d smile proudly and kiss his cheek and insist, once again, that you should do a quiz night at your wedding reception.

     Your lungs are burning. God, your whole body’s just screaming for air, but you can’t find it. There isn’t any. Just endless, depthless water and the occasional wink of sunlight, mocking you from high above, then gone again. Never around long enough for you to find it. Never long enough to save you.

     Instinctively, you suck in another breath. Another barrage of lakewater floods your lungs. Dark spots start speckling across your vision.

     On the dock, Buck is screaming.

     He’d had one hand on the patient’s shoulder, his grip firm but gentle as he helped Eddie guide the guy onto the stretcher. You’d ducked out of sight for a moment, but Buck had been focused on subduing the patient. He tried not to grimace as waves of hot, rancid beer breath crashed over him.

     Then, with a strength that surprised them, the man wrenched out of Buck’s grasp and staggered away from them. Buck doesn’t think he shoved you on purpose, but it didn’t matter; one moment you were suspended, wobbling dangerously close to the edge of the dock, and the next—

     The next, you were gone.

     The patient’s still yelling nonsensically, curses and insults blending together into one unintelligible mess, but all Buck can hear is white noise. He blinks, but you’re still missing. He sees the gurney, the patient, Chimney’s pale face, the ripples spreading over the surface of the lake.

     But no you.

     Terror bolts through him, and without hesitation he’s sprinting to the edge of the dock. No, no, no. Ragged breaths tear out of his lungs as he scans the surface of the water, frantically searching for any sign of you.

     You’re okay, you’re okay, he repeats under his breath, over and over. Any moment now, your head will bob into view, and you’ll shoot him a waterlogged scowl, and he’ll laugh at you doing your best impression of a drowned cat, and everything will be okay.

     But the seconds tick by, one excruciating breath after another. There’s no sign of you.

     Buck shouts your name. A heart-wrenching cry. No, no, no.

     The rest of the team leap into action. Some of them load the patient quickly into the ambulance while Bobby radios for another RA unit. Eddie scrambles to grab the life preserver as Buck tears off his jacket, kicks the heavy boots off his feet. Hen and Chimney prepare their equipment for the worst.

     Please. Please. Buck doesn’t believe in God, but he spares a moment to pray before diving into the lake after you.

     The current catches him off-guard, tugging harshly at his clothes. It rained a lot earlier this week, so the lakes and rivers around Los Angeles are more swollen than usual, but the strength of it sends a spark of fear zipping up his spine. Falling in here, disoriented and panicking…

     He can barely make out your figure through the water’s murky gloom. Kicking hard, he swims down to you, loops strong arms around your waist. Wrapped in Buck’s unrelenting grip, he drags you back to the surface.

     “Eddie!” Buck calls out as he breaks through. Eddie wastes no time in tossing the life preserver towards him, who grabs hold of it with one hand, his other arm coiled tightly around your limp body, trying to keep your head above water.

     Bile rises in his throat as your clammy skin presses against his. You’re so cold. Panic wraps a hand around his throat and squeezes, hard, with every inch he gets closer to shore.

     Eddie and Bobby are quick to pull you both back to the dock, using the life preserver as a tow line. Hauling you out of the water, Buck lowers you gently to the ground. Your head rolls limply sideways, your face unnaturally pale, lips tinged blue from lack of oxygen.

     “They’re not breathing,” Hen murmurs worriedly. She sets the pulse ox on your finger while Chimney tries a sternal rub. You don’t flinch. “Respiratory arrest. Starting CPR.”

     Buck hovers at the edge of things. His chest is tight like a vise, steadily squeezing all the air of his lungs and replacing it with cold, slippery dread. He watches Hen and Chimney work over you, counts the reps in his head alongside them.

     He can’t tear his focus from your hands. They’re so still. Like a doll.

     Or a corpse.

     Please. You can’t leave him. You can’t. He hasn’t had enough time. You’re supposed to be getting married. Walk down the aisle together, spend a lifetime together. You were talking about getting a dog just last night. Planned a trip to the shelter for your next Saturday off. You were going to ask Chris to come with.

     And between one breath and the next, all of that could just be… gone.

     “Buck.” Eddie clasps a hand on Buck’s shoulder, wrapping a blanket around him to stave off the chill. Oh. He’s shivering, hands quivering at his sides, soaked clothes clinging to his skin. The blanket is tiny compared to Buck’s broad frame, but it’s something, at least. “Buck, breathe.”

    On the ground, Hen keeps administering rescue breaths. Every few seconds, she'll pause to check your response, but you remain frighteningly still every time.

     Buck can’t breathe until you do. He can’t.

     He feels so hyper-aware of everything around, the onslaught hitting all at once. The crowd of nosy onlookers gathered at the end of the dock, held back by frazzled park employees and a few other members of the 118. The wind ghosting over his skin, chilled gusts that ruffle his damp curls and creep beneath the blanket seeking wet skin to freeze.

     But most all, you. Always you. He can’t look away.

     Eddie’s hand on his shoulder feels like a tether, not quite breaking him from his thoughts completely but keeping him from falling over the edge of the precipice.

     “Buck, breathe.”

     His whole body shudders as does, finally, sucking a ragged breath into screaming lungs. His vision blurs just slightly. He blinks to clear it.

     You’ll make it. He cannot allow himself to think the worst. He won’t give up on you, won’t acknowledge the dark thoughts creeping in from the corners of his mind. You’ll make it. You have to.

     "Come on, kid," Chimney whispers as Hen administers another round of rescue breaths. "Come on, kid, you've got this—"

     And then between one second and the next, your whole body jolts, and you're vomiting out lungfuls of water. Hen rolls you onto your side, rubbing a soothing palm along your back as you wretch onto the ground.

     "That's it, baby, get it all out," she murmurs. You're gasping and hacking and sputtering lakewater all over the place, still not quite conscious, lips still a little blue and face still startlingly pale, but at least you're breathing.

     A wave of relief crashes over Buck and it almost takes him out at the knees. His heart’s still racing dangerously in his chest, trying to break past his ribs to reach you, and his hands still shake, but you’re breathing again.

     You’re breathing.

     He sways a little as his legs go weak. Buck feels lightheaded just witnessing you expel all that water, and sudden nausea grips his stomach in a vice. But he fights through it, unwilling to take his eyes off you for even a moment, even as his vision begins to blur again.

     Tears gather along his lash line, threatening to fall. He remains silent, not trusting that he won’t dissolve into tears the moment he opens his mouth.

     You’re still gagging, heaving onto the deck, but at least there’s no more water.

     He’s itching to reach out, touch you, feel your pulse flutter beneath his fingers to prove he’s not hallucinating. His hand twitches just slightly, like he almost does, but he feels rooted to the ground.

     Body wracked with violent tremors, you start to relax back onto the ground, limbs limp and leaden, throat and lungs burning like wildfire from the water you expelled. Your breath hitches every few seconds, still shallow and slow, so Hen fixes an oxygen mask to your face as Chimney mutters something about getting you to a hospital just as the second ambulance arrives on scene.

     You don't hear any of that. Blinking once, twice, the light is bright enough to make you squint as your mind swims hazily between waking and unconsciousness. Your head is pounding. You feel like you got hit by a goddamn truck. A pained moan whines out of you as you squeeze your eyes closed again to block out the weak, grey daylight.

     Buck bites his lip bloody as he watches you drift, your eyelids fluttering and your slow, stuttering breaths. His eyes are fixed on the oxygen mask. With every exhale, it turns foggy with condensation, and another knot of worry in his chest starts to loosen, but it’s not enough to put him at ease. Not yet.

     He’ll calm down only once you’ve been checked over at the hospital. Preferably with a second (or third) opinion, just in case.

     “Buck.” Eddie’s grip on his shoulder tightens momentarily as he nudges Buck gently forward. “They need you.”

     On the ground, you're only semi-conscious, still not fully aware of your surroundings. But you feel like you're looking for someone. Like there's someone missing, and you reach out blindly with one cold, trembling hand.

     Buck’s own fingers flex in response, but his legs still feel too heavy. He looks to Eddie, who nods at him, before Buck allows himself to be pushed towards you.

     Eddie’s right. You need him.

     Stumbling forward, he drops down to his knees, a dull thud echoing up from the wood that nearly makes him wince. He edges closer, eyes flicking all over your face, taking in your gaunt, washed out features, that cyan tint to your lips, the way you’re reaching out to him.

     Slowly, so slowly, he hesitantly takes your hand in his, curling careful fingers around yours. He squeezes tightly, and then it’s like he’s afraid someone will steal you away from him, because his grip turns almost tight enough to bruise.

     “I’m here, baby.”

     The hand encircling yours is warm and huge and comfortingly familiar, and when his voice drifts over you, something in your mind flickers with recognition. Your eyes flutter as you search for him, ignoring the way the light feels like skewers in your brain. "Buck?" Muffled by the oxygen mask, your voice is barely more than a whisper, throat rubbed raw from expelling the water.

     "Let's get her on a gurney." Hen is all business, but there's a soft, relieved smile on her face. "We'll start an IV of warm fluids in the ambulance to bring your body temp up. You weren’t down for too long, but I want to get you checked by a doctor soon in case there's any neurological issues."

     She’s addressing you, but it’s Buck who’s listening, taking in what she’s saying. He squeezes your hand again, trying to be a tether to consciousness as you weakly nod. He watches as your eyes search for him again.

     “You’re okay, you’re okay. You’re gonna be okay,” he murmurs softly, his thumb gently caressing the back of your hand.

     It’s more to reassure himself than anything.

     They're quick to transfer you to a gurney, and soon you're being wheeled towards the ambulance. Buck's hand in yours is a comforting anchor to reality, even as your whole body aches with pain.

     "Cold," you mutter once the doors have closed. Chimney's driving. Buck's in the back with you and Hen. You wouldn't have let go of his hand if they'd even tried to separate you, but they didn’t.

     Buck watches over you like he’s scared you’ll stop breathing if looks away. The lines of his fave are still creased with worry, but his thumb is soft, tracing soothing, mindless circles over your skin.

     When you speak his head snaps up slightly, eyes immediately locking with yours as you call out for him, murmuring in a raspy voice that you’re cold.

     “I know, it’s okay. Here, let me.” Hen wordlessly passes him a heated blanket and he’s gentle as he strips you of your wet shirt. Expertly avoiding the leads and tubes attached to your body, he tucks it around you, still holding your hand all the while.

     "Mm." You make a small, pleased noise as the blanket's warmth envelops you. It barely registers when Hen reaches across to take your other hand, wincing a little as she inserts a cannula to start you on an IV of warm fluids.

     "ER is ten minutes out," she murmurs quietly, and settles back to monitor your vital signs, offering you and Buck a little privacy.

     You're still shivering beneath the blanket, even as the warmth of it starts seeping into your bones, but that's more of an aftereffect of drowning than actual cold. You squeeze your fiancé's hand as hard as you can. "Buck?"

     “Right here, baby,” he murmurs softly, squeezing right back. His free hand moves to your head, fingers gently running through your damp, tangled hair.

     "Wanna marry you."

     The words that spill out of you are little more than a mumble, your eyes still closed, face still hidden beneath the oxygen mask. Soaked strands of hair drip murky lake water onto the floor.

     Buck is already your fiancé. You're already engaged. But there's an urgency settling in your gut, twisting up your insides in the worst way.

     You want— no, need to marry him.

     As soon as possible.

     It takes a few seconds to understand what you said, but when the words finally register, it feels like they’ve grown talons that tear right into his chest. The urgency in your tone makes his eyes still, and his heart starts to race all over again, threatening to beat right out of his chest so it can live next to yours.

     Eyes softening, he moves his hand from your hair to rest his index finger under your chin, gently tracing his thumb over your lip.

     “Marry me, huh?” he mumbles softly. You’d never be able to tell that on the inside, his brain is screaming gleefully that he’d marry you right now if Hen were ordained.

     He taps your nose over the oxygen mask, and if you were a little more awake (and not encumbered by the oxygen mask), you’d nip at his finger, a playful smile toying at your lips.

     Instead, you make the cutest grumbling sound he’s ever heard. "Mm. Now.” Your engagement ring is tucked safely in your locker back at the station, replaced on shift by a black silicone band that won't get damaged on a call.

     You squeeze his hand again, tugging insistently on it. Blinking against the harsh light of the ambulance, your gaze finds his, eyes still foggy and unfocused. “Marry me.”

     If another day passes before you’re married to this man, you may actually lose your mind.

     Butterflies swirl around Buck’s stomach, a far cry from nausea that rolled through him not that long ago. The small smile on your lips and the way you’re tugging on his hand make him feel all warm and gooey.

     He laughs softly at you, tapping his finger against your nose again. “Right now? We’re gonna get married right now? With you in the hospital?” He’s got no hope of masking the amusement in his tone. He wants to marry you yesterday. His eyes sparkle as he looks down at you with a quirked brow.

     You nod a little, trying not to wince as that sets off the pounding in your head. God, you pity those who get regular migraines. This is torture, and you only suffered a little oxygen deprivation!

     But Buck is smiling.

     He’s smiling and it's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen. You thought you'd never see it again. You want to see that smile every moment for the rest of your life

     "Mm-hm," you mumble, leaning into his touch. "Eddie can be flower girl. Wedding night in a hospital room. Scandalise the nurses."

     You're not sure how much of that was coherent, but you hear Hen snort, so you figure it was mostly audible.

     Buck’s grin broadens at your suggestion, but he bites his tongue to stifle the laugh bubbling in his chest. “Scandalise the nurses, huh.” He glances at Hen out of the corner of his eye, catching her trying to smother a similar smile.

     You huff at him, as if he’s being particularly difficult. As if you didn’t almost die twenty minutes ago. As if there aren’t more important things to focus on than the elopement you’ve suddenly decided you need.

     Besides. They’re nurses. You’re pretty sure they’ve seen worse.

     “Sucked your dick in the broom closet at work,” you mutter, your eyes falling closed again as warmth and safety wrap you up like a swaddled baby. “We’re pretty scandalous, baby.”

     Hen is barely able to muffle her squawk in time, hand clapped over her mouth, and you can't help but smile at the bright sound of it. You're sleepy, and you've got no filter, but at least everyone else gets to enjoy it.

     Buck, meanwhile, almost chokes on his own saliva. Eyes wide, jaw slack, a rosy flush creeps up his neck. It’s Hen’s reaction that makes him laugh, though, and he finally lets it out, quiet but affectionate as it tumbles from his lips.

     He shakes his head a little as he looks back down at you. “You’re gonna be the death of me, you know that?” His thumb keeps tracing lightly over the back of your hand, and the expression on his face is impossibly soft, his heart still racing in his chest.

     "Eddie in a pretty pink flower girl dress," you mumble, nonsensical images flitting through your mind of your friend drowning in tulle. You sigh. "You'd still be prettier. Just wanna marry you."

     The way he’s looking at you makes you feel warmer than any blanket. You feel like you’re floating on a cloud instead of stretched out on a gurney in the back of an ambulance.

     You want nothing more than to curl up in his arms right now, at home in your bed. This situation is certainly not ideal.

     "Bet we could get Eddie to wear a dress." More sleepy grumbles. You try to roll over, shuffle closer to your fiancé, but annoyingly, your body feels far too heavy to cooperate. "Play the I nearly drowned card. That would work. Bobby can officiate. Hen gets the cake. Can't wait another day."

     Buck snorts at the idea of Eddie in a dress, but his heart feels so full it’s like his body can barely contain it. The urge to wrap you up in his arms, to hold you close and never let go, hits him like a baseball bat to the head.

     “We gotta wait until you’re able to talk without being a smartass,” he says teasingly, tapping your nose again.

     You whine, frowning like a grumpy, tired child. “Then we’ll never get married.”

     Truly, if you have to wait for until the day you stop being a smartass, the world might end first.

     You look over at Hen through sleepy, puppy dog eyes. "Back me up here, Hen." You're so drowsy, exhaustion pulling you into its delicious embrace, but you’re pretty sure you'll remember all of this when you wake up.

     Hen certainly will, at least.

     A slow, sly smile creeps onto her face. Buck feels distinctly like he’s being ganged up on. For once, he really doesn’t mind.

     "Well, we as a firehouse are well-known for our impromptu party planning..." Hen recalls her vow renewal, and Chimney's wedding to Maddie, and every back-to-work celebration she ever organised. They are pretty damn good at this. "As long as the doctors clear you, I don't see why we can't plan a shotgun wedding in your hospital room."

     A triumphant, extremely sleepy grin spreads across your face, and you look back at Buck. "So marry me, hotshot."

     He huffs a melodramatic sigh, as if this is the world’s biggest inconvenience for him, but he cannot hide the way his ears turn pink, the way his whole body lights up like a sparkler on the Fourth of July.

     “A shotgun hospital wedding it is,” he says, bright with glee as he lifts your hand to his mouth, brushing a sweet kiss to your knuckles.

     With that settled, contentment curls up beneath your ribs like a cat in a patch of sunlight, and you doze off into a dreamless sleep, feeling like the luckiest person alive.

[elihermit]

Can you do a buck x reader where the reader and buck are married but she gets amnesia and only doesn't remember buck and their relationship. But it ends with fluff

where’s my mind?

pairing: Evan “Buck” Buckley x fem!reader

summary: you wake up in a hospital bed surrounded by your family and friends, but amnesia took away the memory of your husband, what’s Buck gonna do?

word count: 2,1k

author’s note: thanks to an anon for this request, I hope you all enjoy it, because I definitely had fun writing it 🫧 p.s. requests are open

“Yes baby, I will be home in 10 minutes, just had to stop at a gas station otherwise I wouldn’t make it.” — you say over the phone and sigh. Your day was long enough, of course it couldn’t end well, something had to make it a bit longer.

“Okay love, be safe.” — you hear Buck’s voice and smile. Who would have thought that after four years of dating – you can finally call this man your husband? The past three months of being married were so wonderful, you had everything you dreamed of. “I love you.”

“I love you too, see you soon!” — you smiled again and hung up the phone.

Well, this gas station definitely looks a bit shady, but it was the only one near and you really needed to get some gas.

It was 11 p.m., streets are getting emptier, and flashlights are the only source of seeing something in this darkness. You felt shivers down your spine and thought that it’s time to go home, you didn’t like this place.

Your hand reaches for the car door to get into the driver's seat. But this never happens. Instead, you feel a blow to your head so hard that the only thing you remember is falling to the ground and darkness. If someone got a reward for the most unfortunate end of the day, you would get it today.

Next thing you know, you wake up in a hospital and you try to properly open your eyes, but the light in the hospital is so bright that you squint for the first few minutes. You feel someone is sitting next to you and you turn your head in their direction. It was Maddie.

“Maddie? W-what happened?” — you finally speak and don’t recognize your voice. The voice is so hoarse, quiet and low.

“Oh (Y/N), you’re finally awake.” — Maddie said with a smile. “Don’t worry, you’re fine now, you got attacked at a gas station and had a concussion.” — she took your hand and squeezed it. “I’m gonna tell Buck you’re awake, he just left to buy some coffee. He will be so happy.” — one more smile from her and she left your room.

“Buck? Who’s that?” — you think to yourself and get confused. “Maybe it’s a doctor or something.”

A man runs into your room with a relieved look on his face. You assumed it was Buck. But you really can’t remember his face. Maybe it’s Maddie’s friend or a doctor she knows, she's a former nurse after all.

“Hi baby, I’m so glad you’re awake.” — he rushed to sit next to your bed, took your hand in his and placed a gentle kiss on it. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m sorry, sir, but do I know you? I can’t remember if I ever saw you.” — the confusion is written on your face, you furrowed your brows and looked at him.

But Buck just laughed and smiled at you. You always liked to call him “sir” to tease him. He had no idea why you did that, but he secretly liked it, it made you look cocky.

“I don’t know why you’re laughing, but I’m getting quite uncomfortable by my hand being kissed by a stranger. You better explain.” — you said that and pulled your hand out of his. Why does he think that he has some privilege to do that?

Then Buck realized. You don’t remember him. He felt like his world fell apart in one second. Everything they had been building for almost 5 years just disappeared. Your eyes were saying everything. There’s no love, affection and fondness in them. You didn’t look at him like he was the most important person in your life anymore.

“Maddie, can you explain? This man seems too stunned to speak.” — you said annoyingly, because no one gives any answers.

“(Y/N), I’m Buck, your husband.” — he said with so much pain that for a moment you thought that it’s you who’s acting stupid.

You couldn't lose your memory like that, could you? You remember everyone except your husband. Oh god, you're married, you probably have a house together, lots of plans for the future, but you don't remember anything.

Your head starts to hurt a lot from all the information that doesn't seem real. You look at Maddie and you see that tears are starting to form in her eyes. You see Hen standing outside the door of the room and talking to the doctor. The saddest look you've ever seen is on her face. Everyone remembers everything, why can't you remember?

The doctor comes into your room and gives you a little smile. This smile didn’t say "it's good that you woke up", this smile said "hang on, you have a lot of surprises ahead."

“So, Mr. and Mrs. Buckley, I have some news that I need to share. (Y/N) experienced a severe blow to the head, which led to dissociative amnesia, due to which she may forget something or someone specific in her life.” — so it’s true, you did forget your husband. How long have you two been together? How many good memories did you forget?

“What can we do?” — Buck said, pursing his lips. He took your hand again and squeezed it. This news shocked him, he wasn't ready for it, but he knows for sure that he is ready to do everything in his power to make you remember him.

“The best thing you can all do is put her in the environment where she has been for the last 5 years. Guide her slowly and carefully tell her the events she has forgotten. Memories can come in flashes and this is normal, it means that she remembers and after a while she will remember everything. But I must warn you that there is a chance that she will not remember anything.” — the doctor said and gave Buck a soft look. Unfortunately, he has to deal with many cases of amnesia and the hardest thing is to see the patient's family and know that they don't have the slightest idea what to do next. “Now, if you excuse me, I need to check on another patient.”

There is a chance that she will not remember anything. These words ring in Buck's head. What if she really doesn't remember anything? Would he have to win her love all over again? Would he have to propose to her again? Will they have to build everything again for another 5 years?

2 months later

The door opens. You came back from grocery shopping. Apparently, this is the house that you and Buck moved into after your wedding. Home sweet home, only you don't feel at home. You remember that you lived alone, there wasn't even a man on the horizon that you liked, turns out you're already married.

Buck is very sweet, he hasn't left your side for a second since you woke up. He showed you pictures of you together. Here you are at Bobby's birthday party, here you saw Jee for the first time, here you are at Chim and Maddie’s hospital wedding, here you are spending a free day at the beach. And you could remember those events, but you don't remember living them with Buck.

Yesterday Buck told you that you were supposed to fly to Europe together for the first time in 2 weeks. It's been your dream all your life and Buck was happy to make it a reality. He was happy to share memories with you that would keep you both warm in the future. But the trip will have to be canceled, because he doesn't want to overwhelm you.

“I know it’s a lot and you probably want to run away, but listen, I’m here if you need me. I know you don’t remember me, but I remember everything and my love will be enough for both of us for now.” — Buck put the bags on the floor and came over to you. He stopped in front of you and didn't know how to behave. He wanted to kiss you, but would it be too much? He wanted to hug you, but wouldn't that scare you off?

Seeing how he hesitated, you hugged him yourself. You hugged him to you as hard as you could. The thing is, you were very scared. But Buck instilled a sense of security, he was your safe place. You didn't remember him, but your body remembered exactly how to react to him. And you trusted that instinct.

So far, you have agreed to sleep in separate bedrooms. You didn't want to rush things, and he didn't want to push you. So when night fell, you said goodnight to each other and went to your rooms.

You lay down on the bed and put your head on the pillow, it smelled like Buck. His cologne, his shower gel, the whole room seemed to be filled with him. You looked at the bedside table and saw a photo of you together. So happy and beautiful, in the photo you were somewhere in the park.

“I promise I will remember you. For us.” — you said quietly to yourself and fell asleep.

It was a beautiful sunny day. You look at yourself in the mirror and you're wearing an amazing wedding dress. Your hair, makeup, jewelry — all this made you feel like a princess.

“Athena, I’m so nervous, I don't think I will remember my vows.” — you turned around to Athena while she was preparing your veil.

“(Y/N), you and Buck have been preparing for this wedding for six months, if something goes wrong, it will definitely be Chim that got into some shit again.” — she laughed and took your hand.

“Listen, don't memorize your vows, speak from the heart. Remember how he makes you feel, remember his every look and touch, remember how he looks at you. And don't forget to add his nickname at the end. What do you always call him?” — Athena looked into your eyes and smiled. She knew for sure that your vows would be perfect.

“Light of my life.”

You woke up and were breathing heavily. It was a flashback from your wedding. Of course, you always called him "light of my life." Because he saved you from the darkest stage of your life.

You had your favorite white tulips at the wedding. Buck wanted everyone to come in colorful outfits, but you insisted on a dress code. And the cake ended up being 5 times bigger than you expected, so at the end of the day you handed it out to each guest, so they could eat it at home.

You remembered. Panic began to take over your whole body. Or is it just your love for your husband has returned and your body is responding to it?

You lifted the blanket, got out of bed, and hurried to the room where Buck sleeps. But he wasn't sleeping, you saw the light in his room and opened the door.

“Buck…” — you whispered and felt tears on your cheeks.

“Hey. Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” — Buck saw how panicked you were and rushed to stand next to you. He put his hands on your shoulders and looked into your eyes. “Talk to me.”

“Light of my life.”

He froze. Did you remember? Or is he dreaming? He didn’t want to move to not scare the reality. He just wanted to stay in this moment.

“You don't like oranges, so we immediately told the pastry chef not to offer us cakes with oranges. You really want children, so on our second date we started choosing names for our children. When you were struck by lightning, you pretended to be a Flash for 3 months, and when I dyed my hair and didn't tell you about it, you started calling me because you didn't recognize me, even though I was standing next to you the whole time.” — you started rattling off the facts of your relationship quickly, as if you were afraid to forget, but you remembered everything.

You saw the tears in Buck's eyes and started crying even harder. You couldn't even imagine what he was going through these two months while you didn't remember anything.

“I knew you would remember.” — he said and had the biggest smile on his face. “C-can I kiss you?”

“Please.” — you said it and pulled him to you for a kiss. So desirable for both of you.

“Don’t cancel Europe, we need more memories.”

Buck just laughed, picked you up and carried you to the bed. It's going to be a long night.

[kenacoki]

A Night To Remember

// Pairing // Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley x Fem!Reader

// Genre // fluff

// Summary // With your birthday right around the corner, the 118 decide to throw you a surprise birthday party. Unbeknownst to you, that wouldn’t be the only surprise of the night…

// Word count // 3.5k

// Warnings // none!

// Dividers // sister-lucifer

“No, no, no…a little to my left—yep. Perfect!” Buck glances down at the clipboard in his hand as he checks off the final box on the list. “And that’s it!”

Hen and Eddie look at each other as they descend from their ladders, both stepping back to admire the banner.

‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY (Y/N)!’

“It looks great, Buck.” Hen smiles as she spares a glance behind her to the entrance of the firehouse. “Does Bobby have the cake done yet?”

“Yep! He had to let it cool for a minute, but he’s up in the loft icing it now.” Buck explains as he sets down the clipboard. “I’m going to go change before (y/n) gets here.”

Eddie checks the time on his phone, “Better hurry, man. She should be getting here anytime.”

By the time Eddie looks back up, Buck is already gone from his sight. He laughs to himself as he trods up the stairs to the loft, “He’s hopeless.”

Eddie’s only upstairs for a few moments before he hears your voice calling out from downstairs.

“Hello! Buck…Hen…Eddie…? Where is every-”

“SURPRISE!”

The abrupt chorus of cheers catches you off guard causing you to panic at first. Jumping slightly, you look up towards the loft and see most of the crew peering down over the railing looking at you.

“Jesus Christ, are you guys trying to give me a heart attack…” you laugh, hustling up the stairs. As you reach the loft, you feel your breath hitch in your throat at the sight of the decorations.

The room is filled with twinkling lights, giving off a dreamy atmosphere. The tables are adorned with white tablecloths and celestial-themed centerpieces, adding to the starry ambiance. The walls are adorned with streamers of various shades of dark blue and black, resembling the color of the sky after the sun goes down. The entire space has an almost whimsical touch.

“Oh wow…” you glance around the room in disbelief, overwhelmed with happiness. You let a shaky breath escape your lips, “You…you guys did all of this for me?”

“Is it someone else’s birthday and we don’t know it?” A voice speaks up from behind you…Buck. You whip around and catch sight of your best friend hustling up the loft stairs, “Cause the cake says (y/n)…and that’d be a real pain to change.”

A smile curls at your lips as you playfully roll your (e/c) eyes, “Ha. Ha. Where’d you learn that joke? The back of a cereal box?”

Buck’s hand plops down onto the top of your head as he ruffles your (h/c) hair, causing it to become messy.

“Hey!”

Buck laughs and walks over beside Eddie. You grumble to yourself as you attempt to fix your hair. While you’re doing this, Bobby quietly grabs the chocolate cake he’s prepared and carefully walks over to you.

“Happy birthday to you…” Your head snaps around as you hear Bobby begin to sing, your eyes widening at the sight of the cake.

The rest of the 118 starts to chime in, “Happy birthday dear, (y/n)…” Bobby holds the cake out in front of you, and the reflection of the candle on the cake flickers in your eyes.

“Happy birthday to you!” With a deep breath, you close your eyes and gently blow the candle out…

“What’d ya wish for?” Chimney questions, taking the pan from Bobby as he starts to cut slices of cake for everyone.

For a moment, your gaze drifts over to Buck…his face contorted in a smile at something that Eddie’s said. The outer corners of his eyes are crinkled from how hard he’s smiling. You can’t help it as your heart flutters in your chest at the sight.

Of course, it’s right then Buck would avert his attention to you. Your gazes lock briefly…you can feel the hair on the back of your neck raise as your cheeks take on a slight twinge of pink. Coughing, you avert your attention back in the direction of Chimney.

“If I told you, then it wouldn’t come true. Do you want that for me, Chim? For my wish to die.” You joke, attempting to cover the flustered expression on your face.

Bobby smiles as he rolls his eyes at your behavior, letting Chimney place a piece of cake on his plate. Chimney places a piece onto his plate, “You know, this whole surprise party idea was Buck’s, believe it or not.”

His brown eyes meet yours as he places a piece of cake on your plate, “The man is a menace when he gets a clipboard.”

The group can’t help but chuckle at Chimney's comment, Hen and Eddie giving Buck a sly smile. Meanwhile, Buck’s face turns a light shade of red in embarrassment. You smile in amusement at Chim’s teasing.

Buck clears his throat, trying to change the subject, “Anyway…” he mutters, a hint of redness still apparent on his cheeks as he approaches Chimney. “Give me a slice of cake.”

Chimney dramatically groans before plopping a piece down on Buck’s plate, “There you go, buckaroo.”

Buck looks at him unamused as he strides toward you, his voice quiet so only you can hear him.

“C’mon…” He walks over to the emergency exit door. Your brows furrow in confusion as you cautiously trail behind him, cake still in hand.

“Uhh…where are we going?” You question, watching as Buck uses his behind to open the door. He brings his finger to his lips, silently shushing you.

“You’ll see…” The two of you start up the stairs, the noise from the party slowly fading into the background as you get closer to the roof. Your mind is filled with curiosity and anticipation as you follow him, your guys' steps echoing throughout the stairwell.

Reaching the top of the stairs, he pushes open the door and steps outside onto the roof of the firehouse. The warm night air of L.A. surrounds you as you step outside, the heavy door closing behind you. The only noise provided being the sounds of the city off in the distance.

Buck walks to the edge of the roof that overlooks the city, taking in the bright lights. He sets his plate of cake down on the parapet surrounding the roof, he puts his hands in his pockets. There’s a small, almost contemplative smile on his face.

“You better have a good reason for dragging me away from my party, Buckley.” You jokingly tease, settling yourself beside him. You rest your elbows on the stone parapet, turning your attention towards Buck.

He glances at you from the corner of his eye as you speak, his eyebrows raising in amusement. He lets out a small chuckle as he turns to fully face you.

“Oh come on, am I not allowed to have a private moment with you on your birthday.” He teases, a wide smile on his face.

He slowly takes a step closer to you, nervously rubbing at the back of his neck. The smile on his face is coy like he’s got something up his sleeve.

“I uh, wanted to be the first one to give you your birthday present.”

Your eyebrows raise at his words. He-he got you a gift? A wave of curiosity fills your mind as you wonder what he could have possibly gotten you…

He reaches into his back pocket, his hand emerging with a small, crumpled-up black velvet bag. He holds it out to you, a sheepish grin on his face, “Here ya go. Happy birthday.”

You tentatively reach out and take the bag, your heart skipping a beat as your fingers brush against his. Your heart pounding in anticipation as you bring the bag closer to you.

You slowly open the small bag, your eyes widening as you peek inside. Reaching inside, your fingers brush against something cold and metal. You glance up at Buck curiously…just what exactly did he get you?

Holding the object in your hand, you raise it to eye level so you can see it properly. Your breath catches in your throat as you get a good look at the item in front of you. It’s a delicate golden necklace, a small sunshine charm with your initials engraved on it dangling from the center…

Your heart involuntarily skips a beat at the sight of the necklace, any words instantly dying in your throat. You look up at Buck, your eyes meeting his with a look of complete shock and awe on your face.

Buck smiles back at you, a hint of shyness in his expression. He looks almost nervous as if he’s waiting for you to say something, “You, uh, like it?” he asks, a small bit of uncertainty in his tone.

You open and close your mouth a few times, struggling to find the words. You’re completely stunned by the gift, your heart swelling with emotions. After a moment, you manage to find your voice.

“I…I-It’s beautiful..” you whisper. “I love it.”

Buck’s crooked smile widens, his nervous expression turning to one of pride. He clears his throat, his eyes studying you for a moment, “Do you want me to put it on you?”

Your heart nearly beats out of your chest at his question, the idea of having him put the necklace on you making your heart race in your chest. It’s such a simple, innocent act…and yet, here you are feeling like this. A small shiver runs down your spine as you look up at him; the butterflies in your stomach back in full gear.

“Would you?”

Buck’s eyes seem to gleam at your question, “Yeah, of course. Turn around for me.” he replies, his voice soft.

You spin around slowly, your back now facing him. Your heart is pounding like crazy, every fiber of your being filled with anticipation as you feel him step up right behind you. Buck basically pressed against your back. You feel his fingers brush against the nape of your neck, his warm touch sending jolts of electricity shooting throughout your body. You have to refrain from involuntarily shivering as he leans closer to you.

Buck is incredibly gentle as he brings the necklace to your neck. You feel the cool gold of the necklace against your skin, the metal sending another shiver down your spine. His fingers graze the back of your neck, his nails brushing against your skin as he carefully fastens the clasp.

The feeling of his touch against your skin is enough to almost drive you insane. Your heart thundering in your chest as you desperately try to control yourself.

Slowly, you turn around to face him, one of your hands instantly reaching up to touch the necklace that’s now sitting delicately on your collarbone. As you look up at Buck, you notice the way he’s staring down at you, his eyes taking in the sight of you with the beautiful necklace around your neck.

Buck stares down at you for a moment, his eyes taking in the way the necklace hangs across your collarbone as you toy with it with your fingers. He seems unable to tear his gaze away like you’re a piece of art that he’s admiring.

After a moment, he seems to catch himself, and he clears his throat softly, “It, uh, looks good on you…” he mutters quietly.

A small smile immediately forms on your face at his words, your chest fills with a warm, fuzzy feeling. You couldn’t deny that knowing he bought this and put it on you sent butterflies through your stomach, “Thank you...”

Buck’s smile warms at your response. He reaches out and gently fiddles with the necklace, his fingers brushing against your skin as he toys with the small sunshine charm, “I…I was hoping you’d like it. I wanted to get you something special for your birthday.”

You feel your stomach flutter as his fingers keep brushing against your skin, the sensations overwhelming you. You swallow down the lump in your throat, trying to compose yourself as you speak again. “It’s-it’s absolutely perfect, Buck. I’m so grateful you got it for me.”

Buck’s eyes meet yours as you speak, he seems to study you for a moment. He’s still standing incredibly close to you, so close that you can practically feel his body heat and breath on your face. The butterflies in your stomach are fluttering wildly, your heart pounding in your chest…you break your gaze away and look back towards the rooftop door.

“We…we should uh, get back to the party before—”

However, before you can finish, Buck slowly reaches his hand out and places it on your cheek; his touch sending another jolt through your body. He gently guides you to look back at him, his blue eyes locking with yours. You can see the fire in them, a hint of something in his gaze that you can’t quite decipher.

“I-I want to give you one more thing..” he says, his voice quieter than before.

Your heart skips a beat at his words, the thought of another present from Buck sends even more anticipation through you. Your mind races, unable to even fathom what it could be…you nod at his words, your own voice now a whisper.

“Yeah?”

Buck nods in response, his thumb gently caressing your cheek in the process. He hesitates for a moment, almost as if he’s debating how to proceed, “Just- just close your eyes. I want this to be a surprise.”

Your mind is spinning as he speaks, your thoughts racing a mile a minute. You give him a tiny nod, the anticipation making your hands shake. You close your eyes like he asked, your mind racing with a million different questions.

Buck’s touch disappears from your face for a moment, your heart clenches at the loss of contact. You hear him shifting, his body moving and his feet shuffling against the roof. After a moment, you feel his touch on your cheek again, his hand moving back to its original place. He gently guides your head towards him.

As you keep your eyes closed, your heart is practically racing out of your chest as you wait for what’s about to happen. Then suddenly, you are completely overwhelmed with the scent of him, the intoxicating scent of his cologne filling your nose.

He lets out a shaky breath, “You-you mean the world to me…” His tone is slightly pleading as if he’s begging you to trust him.

You’re tempted to open your eyes, curiosity making you itch to see what he’s about to do..your mouth opens as you start to question what he’s doing—

But before you can speak, you’re interrupted by a feeling of his soft lips pressed against yours. Despite being told to keep your eyes closed, they immediately shoot open. All thought leaves your mind as he kisses you, your body instantly responding to his touch. He’s incredibly gentle, his lips softly moving against yours like he’s afraid to push you too far.

You feel his hand on your cheek drift up into your hair, his fingers tangling in the strands. he gently tilts your head back, the action pushing the kiss even deeper. Your mind is overwhelmed with sensations, the feeling of his body against yours, of his lips moving in unison with yours; your eyes flutter back shut.

You raise your hands instinctively, bringing them to his torso and clutching onto the soft fabric of his henley shirt. The need for air becomes too much, causing you two to break apart from one another.

Buck’s breath is shaky as he rests his forehead against yours. Your faces are still just centimeters away from each other. You slowly open your eyes, your vision still slightly blurred by the shock of what just happened. His eyes stare back at you, a mixture of emotions swirling behind them.

He looks completely flustered, his expression filled with a mixture of awe and slight worry. His hand is still on the side of your face, his other hand resting on the dip of your waist; he’s still holding you incredibly close.

You’re both quiet for a moment, neither of you wanting to be the first to say anything. As your heart pounds, your mind still struggling to process how this just happened. Buck finally breaks the silence, clearing his throat and loosening his grip on you.

“I-I’m sorry I…I couldn’t stop myself... I just…” he mutters, his voice shaky and filled with a hint of uncertainty, he looks like he’s scared you’re going to hate him for what he just did.

You’re frozen for a moment, still trying to recover from the shock of what just happened. However, you can’t ignore the fact that as shocked as you are, you absolutely loved every second of that kiss. Your heart flutters and you bring your hand up to his cheek, your fingers caressing his skin gently.

“Don’t…Don’t apologize..”

Buck’s eyes widen slightly at your words, shock, and relief appearing on his face as he realizes that you’re not mad. He gently leans his face into your hand as you touch his cheek, his body relaxing as he realizes that you’re not going to yell at him.

“You, uh, you’re not upset that I did that..?” he says, some of the shakiness still in his tone.

You almost scoff at how ridiculous that sounds. You’re the exact opposite of upset, and it shocks you that he doesn’t know that.

“Upset? No way.” you reply, your heart still fluttering at the idea of him doing that, of him kissing you so intensely, “Why would I be upset about something that I’ve wanted for so long..?”

Buck’s eyes widen even more at your words, his expression morphing from slight shock to disbelief.

“Y-you-you’ve-you want-” He seems momentarily stunned, like he’s not quite believing what you just said. He swallows the lump in his throat.

“You-you’ve wanted me to do that?” He asks, his voice a tad bit quiet.

You nod slightly at his words, heat rising back up to your cheeks. It’s almost comical how surprised he looks that you wanted him to kiss you, or that you like it. You smile slightly when you respond.

“Why else do you think my heart’s beating a mile a minute?” You tease. “Of course, I’ve wanted you to do that..”

Buck’s expression changes even more at your words, now shifting from slight shock to pure bewilderment. He’s looking at you as if he’s not quite sure he’s hearing everything right.

“B-but…you’ve never said anything to me..never gave me any kind of hint..” His tone is still slightly hesitant.

You sigh, leaning against the parapet and looking back out at the city, “I…I never thought that you felt the same.”

“You thought…you thought I didn’t feel that way?” he asks, his words filled with disbelief.

You sheepishly nod at his words.

“I…I mean...yeah. I didn’t think you were at all interested in me. Honestly, I thought you just saw me as a friend.” You reply, your heart clenching at the realization that you had both been pining for each other this whole time, both thinking the other didn’t want more.

Buck looks at you for a moment, completely stunned at that information. His eyes are wide, the look of surprise still etched on his face as he speaks again.

“So what you’re telling me is…we’ve been idiots this whole time..?”

You nearly laugh at the statement, realizing that he was completely right. You both thought the other didn’t feel that way when in reality, both of you wanted the same exact thing.

“Yeah…yeah I guess we have...” You gently respond.

Buck continues to stare at you for a moment longer before small, toothy grin forms on his face. He shakes his head slightly, he can’t stop himself from letting out a small chuckle at the ridiculousness of the situation. You can’t help but laugh along as you slide your other hand down and intertwine yours with Buck’s.

You two laugh for a moment; You have both been pining for each other this whole time and had really no idea. After a second you both manage to regain somewhat of your composure, Buck’s smirk still on his face.

“You ready to get back to your party?”

You let out a dramatic sigh before rolling your eyes. At the moment, the last thing you really wanted to do was go back to your party and pretend everything was normal. Hell, you’d just kissed your best friend who you’d had a major crush on for years.

“Ugh. Yeah... I guess we should.” You say, your words laced with a hint of playful sarcasm.

Buck chuckles under his breath at your sarcasm, clearly amused at your demeanor. He gives your hand a small squeeze as he responds, “C'mon. The faster we get back down there, the faster we can leave and go do something else..”

Your heart flutters at the way he emphasizes the words “Go do something else”. You know exactly what he’s referring to, he wanted to be alone with you as much as you wanted to be alone with him. You nod slightly at him, smiling as you respond.

“That sounds like an absolutely fantastic idea…”

[targaryenluvs]

AT FIRST SIGHT

PAIRINGS: Dark!Evan Buckley x Fem!Reader

SUMMARY: Never in his life would Buck have ever thought that he’d end up with the girl of his dreams. How she ended up with him doesn’t matter, right?

WARNINGS: Lovesick Buck, obsession, memory loss, kind of Stockholm syndrome, lying, gaslighting, fluff, kisses

a/n: this literally popped into my head after reading @mrsdarkandyandere7 fic on their firefighter so this is definitely inspired by it, go check it out! i know evan’s character isn’t like this but i just thought it’d be cool to explore maybe what could’ve happened if buck’s breakups and general trauma had taken a toll on him 👀

WORDCOUNT: 3.8K Words

Gif not mine, credits to the owner!

Buck was enjoying his day off when he first saw you, waving his way. He turned his head, expecting a friend of yours to be behind him but was thoroughly surprised when you approached him. “You’re a firefighter aren’t you? I saw you on the news.”

Buck smiled at the recognition and nodded along, “Yeah I am, how’d you know?” You laughed at his joke before smiling, “You did an amazing job there, just wanted to let you know. I know sometimes you don’t get the props you deserve so… just wanted to come over.” You looked gorgeous, and your smile was infectious. Buck had been lonely lately, feeling as if he’s behind everyone else.

Always wondering what would’ve happened if he never changed, at least he’d have girls around, right?

But then, he met you. And all of a sudden, he was glad he wasn’t the original Buck. The Buck who felt the incessant need to get into bed with almost every girl he wants. “I sadly have to get going, but it was nice meeting you.” Enraptured with your smile, he watched you walk away. As he smiled to himself he realised, “Wait! I didn’t—,” You’d entered your apartment already, and he didn’t know your name. But you had left your purse on accident.

He sighed deeply, settling back into the bench he was sat on as his hand tightened around his coffee cup. “Stupid Buck, should’ve asked her name straight away.” Whilst plotting about how he could find out your name, the smell of smoke invaded his senses.

Your building was on fire.

He sprung up straight away, his hands sliding all over his phone whilst calling 911.

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“23 Rayweo Drive, there’s a fire!”

“There’s already been multiple calls sir, units are on their way. May I ask who’s calling?”

“Uhh, Evan Buckley. I’m a firefighter!”

“Okay Evan, can you please—,”

All composure faded away the second he saw you at your window, arms waving frantically. “Help! The doors blocked!” The muffled voice coming through his phone was discarded as he made his way up the fire escape. The conjoining apartment had a balcony only about three to four metres from yours, Buck jumped across before grabbing the metal table on yours.

Your apartments glass door shattered as Buck made his way inside, the sirens were getting closer. “Hello? Where are you?” Buck held his arm infront of his face, searching the place for you. “In here!” Your apartment wasn’t fully engulfed yet, the kitchen and entrance were inescapable. But the rest only had small fires, yet to grow. Your bedroom door was untouched but had ceiling debris blocking you from leaving.

Buck went right into action, carelessly throwing the debris to the side before bracing himself, “Move away from the door!” You stood in the corner of the room as Buck pummelled through, ending up on the floor. You rushed over, “Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?” His coughs were rapid, “I’m— i’m okay, let’s get you out of here…” A soft smile came across your lips, “Y/n.” He smiled back, “Buck.” The two of you slowly made your way out, but you stopped and stared.

A painting of yourself and your best friends, hung on the wall. The frame was gold, and melting. Your first ever apartment, up in flames with some of the most precious memories and moments of your life. “Hey, I know it’s a bit of a shock but we need to go.” Buck turned around to look at you, and at the right moment since the ceiling caved in on you. “Wait!”

Your hand waved around trying to grasp something as you held your breath. Were you going to die? All you could feel was a throbbing pain in your head, you’d fallen head first. And as your eyes closed you felt two hand grasp your arm, attempting to pull you out. “Stay with me!” Buck pleaded.

You woke up as you were being lifted onto the stretcher, eyes adjusting to the brightness. “Where— what’s happening?” The paramedic to your right smiled, “Welcome back, can you tell me your name?”

“Y/n/n!” Buck rushed to your side as you smiled, “Buck.” His hands brushed away the hair from your face, “Yeah, I’m here. Right here baby.” You smiled as they lifted you into the ambulance. Buck looked up, “I’m riding with you guys Hen.” The girl, who you assumed to be Hen nodded. You held onto Bucks hand the entire ride, earning some stares from Hen and Chimney.

When they thought you were out, they started questioning him. “You know her don’t you?” He nodded, “I do.” You opened your eyes, as everyone’s attention fell back on you, “Hey there, how ya feeling?” Chimney asked as you smiled, “Good, heads hurting a lot though.” Hen nodded, “You did take a bit of a fall, it’s a given. Your vitals look normal, seems like it’s just a concussion and some smoke inhalation. A few nicks and bruises, you’ll be out in no time sweetheart.”

“She’s right, you’re gonna be okay. Is there anyone you’d like us to call?”

“My mom. Her number is…” Your eyebrows furrowed at your lapse of memory. “Her number is…” You tried again to no avail, “Oh my god, I can’t remember. Why can’t I remember?” Hens face drained, “Uhm, you may have hit your head harder than we thought. Is your phone on you?” You shook your head, “It broke when I fell.”

The ceiling was all of a sudden the most interesting thing in that ambulance. How the hell did you forget your own mother’s number? You tried your hardest to recall but it was hopeless. You tried your fathers, and nothing.

“Maybe a sibling? A boyfriend?”

“I don’t have siblings. No I do, a sister maybe? Or is it a brother? My boyfriend… I—,” Buck watched as you tried your hardest to remember things, and he hated it. He felt horrible, watching you struggle. He just wanted to shout at you that he was here, you didn’t need anybody else. He muttered under his breath, “I could be your boyfriend.” You turned your head, “You’re my boyfriend?” Hen and Chimney looked up at him, “You’re the man? Why haven’t you said anything?”

He was going to disagree, he really was. But with you looking up at him so hopefully he couldn’t help himself. “I didn’t want to confuse her, especially if she didn’t remember. That’s not wrong.. is it?”

You shook your head. “No, no it’s not. I’m just glad you’re here.”

The last few days had been a blur, sitting around or laying down. Nurses fluttering in and out with a million questions of ‘How are you feeling?’ or ‘Do you need anything else?’

Yes, to go home. You wish you could yell at them, but then again, you didn’t have a home. But through it all, you had your boyfriend. Who was nothing short of a gentleman. Always with a smile on his face, always asking how you were. And with him you just wanted to answer his questions.

“Discharge papers are all signed, you’re free to go sweetie.” The nurse beamed as you sighed, “Thank you so much. Have a nice day.” As she left you squealed before hugging Buck, “Whoa there, slow down sweetheart.” You rushed back, “I’m sorry, I’m just so ready to leave this place, and eat real food.”

Buck laughed at your growling stomach, “I promise to cook for you every night.” He pledged with a hand to his heart, “Oh shut up! Quick question, does this mean I’ll be staying with you? Until I find a new place and talk to my insurance company?” Buck frowned at the idea of you leaving him, “I know this might seem a bit quick but, what’s the point in you moving out? When you could just move in with me? I mean… you’d never have to worry about a fire with me.”

You grinned at him whilst picking up your purse and slinging it over your shoulder. “I already look like you since I’m wearing your clothes. You sure you want me 24/7?” He’d want you glued to him if he could. “Of course, I could never get sick of someone so pretty.” Buck flirted as your cheeks heated up, his hand traced your back sending tingles up your spine. He cupped your face and brought you closer.

Your lips were soft and sweet, the lip-balm you used was flavourful and he couldn’t get enough. His hand traced down your back, pulling you closer into him as you smiled into him, “Buck.” Your voice was muffled as he continued on, you put your hands on his chest and pushed back, “Stop, we’re in public.” You giggled as he threw his head back, “If anyone looks at you I’ll just punch em’.” You gasped, “Buck!”

He raised his arms, “What?” The two of you finished packing up before saying your goodbyes to the nurses that had taken care of you. “You never told me you had a jeep.” Buck laughed, “I was kind of hoping you’d remember, you love her.” You nodded at his words, “I can definitely see why I did, or do.” When you arrived at his place you were irrevocably in love.

“I love the exposed brick!” Buck set your purse down on the counter as you ran your hands along the walls before making your way to the couch. “And the couch is tucked away, it’s like a bit of privacy yknow?” Buck leaned against the counter with his arms crossed, “Well duh, you’re the one that helped me pick it.” He knew you hadn’t of course, but it was somehow easy for him to block her out and replace her with you.

“I did?” You looked his way as he walked over before standing in between your legs, “You loved this place a lot. So I got it as a surprise.” You smiled at him before pulling him down on top of you, “Why don’t we spend the rest of the day at home, and you tell me all about you and me?” He smiled at the sound of ‘home’, your home.

And that’s exactly what happened, the rest of the day he spent making up an ideal version of the two of you. Of how you met, how the two of you were yet to tell anyone since you really loved keeping it to the two of yourselves. And how he was always a ‘in the moment’ type person, explaining the lack of photos together. You then went out to buy yourself a new phone, and trade over the SIM card.

“Hey babe?” You called out to him as he cooked in the kitchen, “Yeah what’s up?” He glanced over his shoulder to you, “I can’t find you in my phone.” Buck breathed in, he forgot about that. “We… had a bit of a fight the day before. Pretty sure you blocked me or something, and since I’m petty, I did the same thing.” You stared at your phone in confusion, “I’ve never blocked someone, especially over something as simple as an argument.”

“Well, you have. Your brains a bit fuzzy babe, it’ll come back to you soon enough.” You glanced up at him, suspicion filling through you. “Alright, can I grab your phone and put my number in?” He nodded before pointing to the bed upstairs. You jogged upstairs before unplugging his phone. “My birthday.” You quickly filled in the password and were met with a million messages and calls.

Hen: Buckkkk, reply to us. Are you okay?

Cap 🔥: Buck, you need to call in if you’re not coming.

Maddie ❤️: YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?

Eddie: There’s no way you have a girlfriend and just forgot to tell me.

Eddie: I’m coming over.

These guys must be his friends and coworkers. But you couldn’t help but wonder, had he seriously not told any of them that he has a girlfriend? Not even a hint? The last text from Eddie was only half an hour ago, which meant—

RING!

The doorbell rung out as you made your way downstairs, “Hey, no I’ll grab the— door.” Buck was late to it, as you swiftly opened the door to reveal, “Eddie!” He smiled, “Hey Buck, and you must be?” You grinned, “Y/n, but you can just call me Y/n/n. Please, come in!” You opened the door wider to reveal a kid, “And who’s this?” Eddie had his hand on the kids back, “Y/n, meet my son Christopher.” You kneeled infront of him before stretching out your hand, “Well hello there Chris, I’m Y/n and it is very nice to meet you.”

“Hello Y/n. Buck never told us he had a girlfriend.” You laughed at the comment as the two shuffled in before settling on the couch, “Well, if it’s any consolation, we hadn’t really told anyone yet. So technically you’re the first to officially meet me. None of my friends or family know about Buck yet.” Chris smiled, “What do you mean officially?”

“Well technically, everyone’s kind of met me already but I was rescued from a fire.” Eddies face dropped, “Oh my god, I completely forgot to ask, are you doing okay? It must’ve have been hard to recover.” You appreciated his empathy, “Yeah, it was a bit difficult at first but I was in the hospital. I mean, it was my first apartment and it went up in flames, it’s pretty hard to just get over it. But Buck has been an absolute angel, I’m really lucky to have him with me. I’ve been having memory issues, to the point where I wake up and forget where I am,”

“Oh god, have you been put on any medication?” You nodded, “I have, and it’s been helping. I think with the days my memory will come back. I mean I didn’t even remember Buck and I were together in the ambulance.” You laughed as you looked over at Buck, he chuckled at the joke whilst Eddies eyes flicked between the two of you before laughing dryly.

“Dinners ready!” Buck shouted out, the conversation was getting a bit too much for his liking. The four of you stuck to light topics at the dinner table on account of Christopher as well as you. And it was super enjoyable for you, Eddie is an amazing father and you could see how close Buck was with him and Chris.

“Well I think it’s time for this one to go to bed.” Eddie rose up before collecting the plates, “Hey no, you’re a guest, you don’t have to clean up.” You spoke as you grabbed the plates from him, “No no, you should be resting Y/n/n.” You both made your way around, “Okay we can both do them. You wash, I dry.” Buck sat on the couch with Chris playing video games, whilst simultaneously trying to eavesdrop.

“It’s way too late for the two of you to be driving home no? I’m sure you could stay. Me and Chris upstairs and the men on the floor seems just right,” Eddie threw his head back laughing, “Ohh, I see how it is!” You bumped his side and he bumped right back.

If all of Bucks friends were this great, he would’ve had to be one of the luckiest people around.

Chris and Eddie did end up staying the night, but the two men couldn’t sleep. So Eddie and Buck ended up having a few late night drinks, “So, Y/n. She’s absolutely incredible. So I have zero clue how you ended up with her.” Buck shoved his arm, “Hey I am a catch.”

“That I’d throw right back out.” Eddie joked as Buck rolled his eyes, “But you never told us anything about her, and I’m not gonna lie, I’m a bit disappointed. We usually talk about everything Buck. And I know you well enough to know when you’re talking to someone.” Buck sighed, “It’s… complicated.”

And the weight of his secret was bound to come crashing down at some point, right?

Eddie stood with his head in his hands trying to understand everything his best friend had tried to tell him. “So you kidnapped her?” Buck immediately turned to him, “What? No! We were in the ambulance and she assumed I was her boyfriend, and god if you’d seen the look on her face you’d understand why I said yes. She was all alone, her apartment was burned down and her phone was broken. Maybe if it was some random person I wouldn’t have said yes, but I’d talked to her before. I knew she didn’t deserve anything that was happening to her. And she wouldn’t have a place to go if she couldn’t even remember her friends or a phone number.”

“So you took her in, to be a nice person? Were you going to kick her out when she remembered? What if she calls the cops?” Eddies head had about a million scenarios rushing through right now, “Eddie, please. You know me, I’m not a bad guy. If she starts to remember then I’ll tell her. But, we’ve gotten along so well these past few days, like you said she’s incredible.”

“Oh god, don’t tell me you fell in love with her.”

“Well…” Buck scratched the back of his neck as Eddie groaned, “Buck are you serious?” Eddie screeched, “Shh! Do you want to wake her up? Look, if she realises then I’ll explain everything I promise. But it’s not like I’m holding her hostage. I’m just trying to give her a place to call home before she gets back out there.”

“Buck, she calls you ‘babe’, and you do too. You have a million nicknames for her. Every time you get the opportunity you kiss her. It’s wrong, she has no clue what’s happening here.” Eddie tried to rationalise with him but it was no use. Buck sighed, “I know, it’s just— I know her. I met her before the fire and she was so nice, I was going to ask her out but then this all happened. And it’s not like she doesn’t like me either, is it really so wrong?”

“I guess not, but you need to tell her. If she really likes you, then I guess she’ll give you another chance to actually take her out.” Buck rushed forwards and hugged him, “You think she’ll give me another chance? Thank you Eddie!” Eddie scoffed, “You really like her huh?” Buck couldn’t help but look back up at you, “I do.”

Your eyes were wide open, adjusted to the dark. Eddie and Bucks conversation was playing over and over in your head, he lied to you. But again he wanted to keep you safe, would you be homeless right now if it weren’t for him? Or would you have found a friend?

The good and bad parts of the situation were equal in your eyes. He’d been lying to you, kissing you and treating you as if you were his girlfriend. Taking advantage of your state of mind, but you’d met before, and he was going to ask you out. And if he had, you knew what your answer would have been.

Yes.

And it wasn’t as if he was dangerous, or at least you hoped not. Tiredness came over you, the last thing you remember hearing being the sound of Bucks voice wishing you sweet dreams.

By the time you woke up Eddie and Chris were long gone, Buck was busy cooking up breakfast. “There you are sleepyhead.” His smile was always bright when directed at you, and with the morning glow you could only see the good. “Buck, we need to talk.”

Who knew five words could strike such fear?

And you sat infront of him, “I know. I know about the fire, and the fact that you aren’t my boyfriend. And hey—,” Buck didn’t waste a second apologising, “I’m so so sorry I knew I should’ve told you straight away. But when you said I was I went along with it and that was stupid. But I didn’t want you to be alone and if you want to go I will—,” Your laugh stopped him in his tracks, “It’s okay Buck. I’m not mad, well I am a little since you’ve been kissing up on me every chance you get but… you’re just a bit dumb in how you went about it.”

Buck smiled as he set out breakfast for the both of you, “Now how about this. We finish up breakfast and then you take me out on a proper date where we get to make all of our firsts for real. I really do like you Buck, your heart was in the right place, execution? Not so much.”

And the rest of the morning you spent laughing at Buck and his love sickness. “You know you’re kind of obsessed with me, it’s a bit creepy.” Bucks face immediately drained, he stared at your back as you washed the dishes. “But my heart was in the right place right?” He sounded desperate with the sentence, “Sure.”

You liked Buck, there was no denying it, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of weirdness.

As the two of you continued getting to know eachother Bucks happiness sky rocketed. And everyone could tell, “If you smile any longer we’ll need to tattoo it onto your face Buck.” Bobby joked as everyone teased Buck, “I am in a happy, loving relationship. Be proud of me.” Eddie couldn’t help himself, “Does she know that?”

The whole table burst out laughing as Buck groaned, “She has her memory back can we please not joke about it.” Hen pointed at him with her fork, “Trust me, we’re not laughing at her, we’re laughing at you Lover Boy!” The footsteps coming up the stairs were drowned out by the sea of laughter, “If Shakespeare was alive you’d for sure be an inspiration Buck.” Chimney spoke from the kitchen.

“Wonder what he’d name it.” Your voice caused the five of them to turn your way, “Y/n!” Eddie shouted as you engulfed him in a tight hug. “If I squeeze too hard you’ll forget my name,” He joked as you punched his abdomen, “Don’t make me hurt you.”

“There’s the famous Mrs Buckley.” Bobby smiled as you made your way over to him, “Cap!” He opened his arms up to you as Buck grinned, his team finally meeting you made him feel happy. “Great to finally meet you, but I feel like we already know you.” He spoke as he pulled out a chair for you. “He’s right, Lover Boy never shuts about you.” Chimney teased as you kissed Bucks cheek.

“Well aren’t you sweet? We all know how lovesick he is I presume?” The team laughed as Buck rolled his eyes, “Yeah, yeah let’s get the jokes out the way.” You smiled before holding onto his hand.

Buck downplayed just how much he loved his team, they were like a family, and now you were apart of it too. Buck was grateful to be in it, especially with you being the new addition. But every once in a while he couldn’t help but remember how he got you.

Love At First Sight.

[megalony]

Eddie Diaz (911) Masterlist #2

I've gotten to that point again where I have reached the limit of links I can add into one post. So here is my overflow masterlist.

Eddie Diaz:

I'm Scared Part 2

A Little Too Eager Part 2

I Failed Part 2

Our Army Part 2 Part 3

A Family Gathering Part 2 Prequel

Attacked Part 2

Stress Levels Part 2

Make It Stop Part 2

Saving Grace Part 2

I Need To Help You Part 2

The Proper Experience Part 2

Dark! Eddie:

Good For Us

Ruin You

I Won't Be Merciful

Doctor! Eddie AU:

I'm Her Doctor

Cause Of Malpractice

I'll Take Care Of Her

[deans-angel67]

Bruises and Surprises

Summary: When Eddie is acting off and then comes home late Evan and Y/N start to worry. But when they find out why he's been acting off, it causes some problems.

Pairing: Eddie Diaz x fem!reader x Evan Buckley

Wordcount: 2.5k

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing possibly, mentions of violence and injuries

A/N: This was inspired by @megalony Late Night Fights. I hope you guys enjoy this, thank you for the support.

____

The four of them sat at Eddie's kitchen table that morning. Both Evan and Y/N had the day off, Chris was going over to a friends house for a sleepover today. And Eddie decided to pick up an extra shift at the fire house.

"You know you didn't have to take that shift Eddie." Y/N says as he pours coffee into a turmos mug. It was rare that the three of them had a day off at the same time. So naturally she was a little disappointed when Eddie said he chose to do an extra 12 hours.

"I didn't realize you were off today, I'm sorry mi amour." He says dropping a kiss on the top of her head.

"You got all your stuff ready Chris?" Chris nods at Eddie's question and then gets up to go grab his things.

"You know there's no harm in taking a day off right. I mean you've been working a lot lately." Evan pitches in concern evident in his voice. As he puts his mug down on the table.

"You should be taking better care of yourself Eds." She said putting a hand on her stomach, masking a slight discomfort that made it's appearance.

"You two are blowing this way out of proportion." Eddie had been acting off lately. He was shorter tempered and he had been picking up a lot of extra hours. He was tired and overall frustrated often. They were both a little worried. Y/N hadn't seen him act this way for a long time. She was getting really worried.

The last time Eddie had acted this way she ended up getting a call say that he needed to be bailed out of jail. But she hadn't seen any bruises or marks on him, maybe she was over reacting.

"Why don't you call in sick?" Evan proposed, only to receive a scoff from Eddie.

"I said I'd be there, Buck. Come on, Chris!" Eddie gave them both a quick kiss before his son finally entered the room. Y/N and Evan said goodbye to Chris and just like that the house became quiet.

"He's acting strange right?" She asked Buck, her hands wrapped around the mug as she stared at the dark liquid before glancing at him.

"Yeah, he is." Evan confirmed.

~~~

Y/N stood in the kitchen cutting vegetables for supper. Two hands made their way to her waist and then her front. Buck leaned his chin on her shoulder as she hummed along to the song playing.

"Why don't you go sit?"

"Babe, I'm fine." She told him pausing to look up at him, kissing him on the cheeks.

"You were sick all morning." He presses. She put the knife down and turned in his arms so she was facing him. Her hands came up to cup his jaw.

"I promis, I feel fine. Good even." She spoke softly giving him her full attention. He let out a sigh searching for something unusual in her features only to find nothing.

"You promis? And if you start to feel even a little off you'll go sit?"

"Yes baby, I promise." She gave him a sweet smile and a kiss on the cheek.

"Well, then let me help. What can I do?" Evan asked going over to the sink to wash his hands.

"You can take over cutting while I get started on the sauce." She took a pot out and placed it beside the one with water. They didn't get to cook together often. It was often Buck or Y/N never Eddie. They were scared they wouldn't have a kitchen by the end of it, or taste buds.

By the time everything was ready it was 8pm. Late compared to 'normal' hours but their schedule was so weird that they got used to eating at odd hours.

"Shouldn't Eddie be home by now?" Y/N asked looking up at Evan with worry.

"His call must have run late. It happens all the time." He reassured her wrapping a hand around her waist and hugging her, his head going down to her neck.

"We should wait for him."

They ended up eating an hour and a half later. Without Eddie.

It was 11pm when Y/N wanted to go to bed but was to busy paissing their living room.

"This can't just be a call Evan."

"Sweetheart-"

"Theres no way he has been on a call for over 3 hours!" He was also getting worried, he just didn't want to show it. It wasn't impossible, but another unit would have gotten there and they would have been able to go back to the station, and back home.

"Baby stop, please." He gently grabbed her arms stopping her movements.

"How about you go to bed-" she shook her head and open her mouth to protest but Evan stopped her.

"How about you go to bed and try to sleep, and I'll go down to the station and see what's going on." She let out a sigh, hesitating.

"Your exhausted and you have work in the morning, Sweetheart. I wasn't really asking." Evan made himself more clear. Her hands went to his biceps and his to her waist.

"Fine."

~~~

It was dark in the house when he came home. Using his hands to make sure he didn't run into anything.  When he reached the kitchen he turned the light over the sink on. He grabbed the first aid kit from the top of the fridge groaning from the pain it caused.

He took his shirt off letting it fall to the ground, he looked down spotting the dark bruises painting the various parts of his body. He took out some rubbing alcohol and cream setting them on the counter.

"Eddie?"

He turned around to find Y/N standing in the doorway of the kitchen. She was just about to fall asleep when she heard the front door.

"Baby where have you been? Why didn't you answer your phone?" She rushed forward only for her to stop a few feet away from him. A small gasp left her when she actually took the time to look at him.

"A call ran late, I'm sorry." He explained. She approached him gently running her fingure tips over a bruise on his stomach to which he winced.

"Eddie..." His name was spoken so softly he barely caught it.

"It was a rough one. It looks worse than it is, mi amour." He said, he put a hand on her arm trying to comfort her. But then she caught sight of his bloody and bruised knuckles. She took in a sharp breath standing up straighter. It all clicked in her head.

"You've been fighting again, haven't you?" She looked at him disappointment flooding her eyes.

"What? No, of course not." The slight hesitant in his voice told her otherwise.

"Edmundo, do not lie to me." She said angerly, tears welling up in her eyes despite her attempts to stop them. He took a deep breath closing his eyes and tilting his head slightly up.

He wasn't planning to do it again but a few weeks back an old buddy from back when he did illegal fighting contacted him. Said then needed someone because some guy left last minute. It was supposed to be a one time thing. But one turned to two, and two to three until it got out of hand.

"Baby-"

"Why!? Why would you possibly do that again?!" She was livid, rightfully so. She took a step back until she hit the kitchen island.

"It's complicated." He said looking back at her. Letting out a sigh, he didn't want to explain.

"Complicated? How could it be Complicated? This was in the past, we left it there, with the lawsuit, and the heartache and- and jail. We talked about this." 

"It's not the same. I'm careful I know what I'm doing." He tries to explain, but it wasn't good enough.

"You also knew what you where doing when you broke that guys nose!" She yelled, not hearing the front door over their arguing.

"That's not fair."

"Look at yourself!" He swallowed hard. He was littered with cuts and bruises. He knew he shouldn't come home looking like this.

"Eddie?" Evan stood at the other end of the kitchen, his voice caused them both to look over at him.

Y/N kept a concern look on her face but a weight on her shoulders was lifted knowing that Buck was home and okay, it was one less thing to worry about. Eddie seemed surprised, he though Evan was sleeping.

"Thank God, your okay. I've been looking everywhere for you." Evan drops his keys on the counter and rushed to hug his boyfriend. Y/N letting out a sigh and ran a hand through her hair.

Eddie inhaled sharply as Buck hugged him and winced. He returned the affection and then pulled away a little.

"Buck." It was strained and said through gritted teeth because of the pain. When he finally pulled away he got a good look at Eddie.

"What the hell happened?" He said anger in his tone. When no one answered he turned to his girlfriend for help.

"You don't talk about fight club right?" She said sarcasticly causing Eddie to roll his eyes.

"What?" Bucks face filled with confusing looking between the two.

"He's fighting again." She explained moving to the other side of the island to create space between her and the boys.

"What!? Why?" He turns to Eddie brows furrowed, he wasn't there when he did the fights in the past. Y/N was. He had heard of some of them from her, like the one where he broke a guy's nose so bad he choked on a piece of cartilage.

"Can we please not have this conversation again." Eddie felt like they were going around in circles, and it didn't help when his girlfriend just pick up the conversation where they left off when Evan arrived.

"They know what there doing as much as you do. How do you know how it's going to end? Next time it could be you, and they won't stay to help you, they'll leave you there." She didn't want to fight with her boys tonight, not with all the stress that she was under. Today was supposed to be a good day, and it only seemed to take a turn for the worst.

"Y/N-"

"She's right, I thought you were donne with it Eddie." Evan cuts in, concern and confusion evident on his face and in his voice.

"Apparently not." She muttered her hand rubbing her temple

"Do you know how much you scared us tonight?" Evan tried to make him understand. Y/N started to feel a slight discomfort, but she was unsure from what.

"I'm sorry." He really did feel bad, he knew he was extremely late. The missed phone calls and texts were unlike him.

He fished his phone from his pocket and set it on the counter. The screen was shattered and the back metal panel was missing a few pieces falling out of the phone as he sets it down.

"Eddie you can't start doing this again, I wasn't there when you did it before but Y/N told me it got pretty brutal." Evan explained his concern about his past, scared that it might repeat.

"Look it's just a few fights, and they help. I come home and I'm not angry or impatient." Eddie tried to reassure them but it wasn't working. He ran a hand through his hair.

"No, you come home bloody and bruised. Like thats any better." Y/N pitched back in sarcasm lassed in her voice. A hand going to her stomach now understanding where the discomfort came from

"Eddie you can't keep doing this, not after tonight." Evan almost pleaded.

"You don't get it!" He argued back, getting more frustrated by the minute. Y/N winced gripping the counter with her free hand.

"Then explain." Evan continued to try and reason with him but nothing seemed to work.

"I can't!" Eddie shouted, the two boys to engrossed in their argument to see the clear pain their girl was in.

"This isn't healthy, I though you talked about it with your therapist." Buck continued to try and understand.

"Evan-" He was cut off by Y/N.

"Uhh! Will you two stop!" She was hunched over, one hand still on the counter for support the other on her stomach. A pained look on her face.

"Y/N?" Eddie turned to her and took a few steps in her direction.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Evan was extremely concerned. He rounded the island and stood beside her placing a hand on her hip.

"You two are stressing me."

"Mi amour, that can't be stress." Eddie gently rubs circles into her back.

"Since when does stress cause you pain?" Evan asked, she stood back up straight.

"Since I've been pregnant."

They both look at each other, wanting to have confirmation they heard the same thing.

"Pregnant?"

"Baby, are you sure?"

"I was hoping for a little more excitement boys." She remarked.

"Okay, how about we get you to the couch?" Eddie spoke looking at Evan.

Once she was seated on the couch the boys sat on either side of her.

"How long have you known?" She looked over at Buck and took a deep inhale.

"A week." She leaned back until her back hit the couch and looked between the boy. Trying to see both their reactions.

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"I was going to, but you both have such a hectic work schedule that I was trying to find the right time. And then Eddie decided to work today so... This isn't how I wanted to tell you." She looked down at her hands in her lap.

She had spent so much time trying to plan the perfect moment. Tonight was gonna be it over some dinner the three of them. So they could figure out how to tell Chris together. But everything went wrong, it usually did with them. The execution was terrible, but the result was always good. Buck set a hand on her shoulder squeezing slightly to give her a little comfort.

"Where does it hurt?" Eddie asked concern painted on his face.

She looked over at him and set her hand on her lower stomach to show him. He reached over lifting her shirt a little and pressing a hand in different areas. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

"I'm sorry baby." He apologized glancing between her and Evan. He hated that he had cause this. The stress and pain. He never wanted this to happen.

"It's just you two are constantly risking your life at work. I don't-"

"Hey, I get. I won't go to the fights anymore, I swear." Eddie stopped her to explain. He understood how much this meant to her to both of them. She gave him a small smile before it turned to a frown when she spotted Evan leaning down to be slightly above her stomach

"Now, you gotta stop giving trouble to your mom little guy." She let out a giggle running her hand in his hair only to lift his face and give him a kiss

"I don't think thats how it works Buck."

[boybandbaby]

Secret (Evan Buckley x SingleMom!Reader)

word count: 1343

warnings/tags: nervous buck, 18+ mdni (mention of sex), as always please let me know if i missed anything

note: part of my single mom reader universe which can be found here

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Buck had noticed your change in demeanor from the first two dates. He thought things had been going well but he’s starting to second guess himself.

He starts to think that maybe he had worked up this idea that things with you could be end game. I mean it was only your third date and he was already thinking of engagement rings.

He had been scolded by each member of the team and his sister when he asked Chimney which ring shop he went to. They all told him to slow his roll and not to get ahead of himself. Though they were excited for him and his new situationship, they didn't want him to get too ahead of himself.

He wonders if maybe you had noticed that he was beginning to really have feelings for you. Maybe now you had found him creepy or too pushy or too needy. Was he texting you too much? Was he asking to see you too much? Had he made you uncomfortable and now you were trying to figure out how to break things off already?

Then he remembered a joking comment from Eddie on yesterday's shift. He had been discussing the movie you picked out for both of you to see and that he was really excited to spend more time with you.

"How long have you guys been seeing each other?" Eddie had asked.

"We've been talking for a little over a month but it's officially our third date." Buck replied, buttoning his shirt up.

"Ooh, third date? You know what that means." Eddie wiggled his eyebrows. Buck knew he said it to be funny but now Buck wonders if you maybe live by the ridiculous rule of sleeping together after the third date.

What if you’re expecting sex tonight? Or what if you’re freaking out about him wanting sex tonight? Or what if you don’t want sex with him at all, ever?

Buck can feel himself sweating through his shirt in the very well air conditioned movie theatre. He’s glad it’s somewhat dark or he’s sure you could see the sweat beads rolling off his forehead. He knows you very well may be able to see him as he can see your face clearly in the light from the screen.

You’re quieter today. Face bright under the movie lights with a small smile that has a hint of nervousness in it. The popcorn bowl is still quite full and candy boxes unopened despite both of you stating you loved movie snacks.

You spend the entire movie silent and rigid in your seats. Your hands found each others' the first two dates. The first time over the table at dinner and the second time on the car console on your way to the beach. Now, they lay in your lap and his on the arm rests. You're itching to hold his hand but you're just too nervous about the secret you're holding in.

Buck knows he has to confront you kindly after the movie about what’s going on and hopefully reassure you he’s not in this just for sex. So as you’re both finally leaving the theatre, the last ones, he goes to speak when you do first. “That was a good movie, right?”

“Yeah, yeah. I enjoyed it.” He smiles, hands in his pockets as you stand in the cold, face illuminated by the neon lights of the signs out front. Buck cannot remember who was even in the movie, let alone the plot. “Look, I wanted to talk to you about something…” he trails off.

“Oh? Um, yeah sure.” You look around and guide him to a near by metal bench. “Everything okay?”

Internally, you’re spiraling. You know you haven’t been acting normal tonight but you hoped that he would just ignore it. You’ve only known him for a few short weeks but you know parts of him by now. You know Buck has a habit of overthinking things so you’re sure he’s picked up on it. You’re wondering if somehow he knows your secret.

“I know it’s our third date and there’s this like third date rule that people follow. I just want you to know that I’m not expecting anything from you. I hope that’s not why you’ve been quiet all night. I know we’re still getting to know each other but I hope you know that I would never try to pressure you into doing something you weren’t comfortable with.” Buck rambles, hands flexing and squeezing on his thighs. He can feel sweat accumulating on his palms and he realizes he hasn’t even looked at your face since he started talking.

When he looks up, your eyes are slightly glossy and he’s not sure what he’s said to make you…upset?

“Y/n…”

“I have a daughter!” You blurt. When you search his face for any sort of information on how he’s feeling about this news, you’re met with furrowed brows, mouth slightly agape, and silence. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled it out like that. All night I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell you. It’s the third date and yes I’m aware of the third date rule but I of course know you weren’t trying to sleep with me. I just figured the third date is either make or break and it was time for me to tell you about my daughter. You know, that way you can decide if you want to continue seeing me or get out before it goes any further.”

“What’s uhhhh, what’s her name?” He stutters.

“Her name is Evie. She just recently turned 7. Her father isn’t in the picture but that’s a story for another time.” You wave off. “What do you think? Or like how are you feeling about all this? I'm so sorry I haven't said anything up until now."

“It’s doesn’t change how I feel about you. I’m surprised, sure, but I know you probably kept it a secret for a reason. I can’t imagine it’s easy being a single parent and trying to date.”

“It’s not just that. I don’t want to bring someone around her until I know that it’s serious and it hardly gets to the serious state. I really like you but I was scared this would scare you away. I’m also scared that we’ll get in too deep and you’ll realize you don’t want to be with a woman who has a kid or that the other shoe will drop and you’ll be this horrible evil guy.” You finally grab his hand. "But I know you're not a bad guy."

“Just breathe.” Buck kisses your knuckles. “Breathe, babe. I totally understand where you’re coming from. We'll take this as slow as you want. Your daughter comes first and I want to be part of your life and eventually hers if you'll let me."

"You're seriously so sweet, Buck." You pull him in for a hug. "I don't want to force you to stay or make you feel like you have to be okay with this."

"You're not forcing me to do anything. I really really like you and I want to make this work. I'll be as involved as you'll let me and I'll be patient with you just like you are with me and my job." He rubs your back before kissing your forehead. "Please don't ever scare me like that again, though. I was freaking out the entire movie."

"I'm sorry! I was nervous!" You laugh. "I could barely pay attention to what was happening."

"I don't even remember what movie we were watching." He smiles. "You want to go for ice cream? Or do you have a curfew?"

"Shut up, I don't have a curfew." You push his shoulder. "I could go for ice cream, as long as you're buying."

"I think you should buy me ice cream since you had me on edge all night." He winks. "Come on, milfy."

"Evan!" Your eyes widen as he starts running to his car. "I can't believe you just said that!"

─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───

[eddiazx]

the bet part 2 - evan buckley x reader

part 1 here!

You already took a shower today. Buck knows this too, but it still doesn’t keep him from shedding his clothing and stepping into the shower behind you. You don’t acknowledge him, keeping your back to him instead, because this is a battle of wills and you weren’t going to be the one to break first. So you go through the usual routine of grabbing your loofah, squeezing an exorbitant amount of body wash on it, but before you can run it over your body, it’s pried away from your hands. Score, you think.

Buck takes the loofah, and starts the journey from your shoulders, washing down your back, your butt, and behind your legs. He maneuvers you to face him, and does the same down your front. You don’t miss the twitch of his dick when he passes your breasts or between your legs. When the warm water washes the suds away, Buck puts the loofah away, turns the shower head off, and urges you to sit on the shower bench you made fun of when he first bought it, but have since come around to see the appeal. Buck drops to his knees in front of you, takes one of your legs and puts it over his shoulder, giving your core a long, appreciative once-over. “So wet for me, sweetheart.” He murmurs, a dark smirk gracing his features.

“Well, I just took a shower.” You retort, albeit half-heartedly.  

Buck shakes his head fondly, because of course you had to get the last word in, before changing topics. "Gimme a number, honey.”

“Huh?” You question, puzzled. 

“How about six? Or wait, maybe eight?” Buck continues. 

“A number for what?”

“How many times I can make you come today. It sounds like a fitting prize for the winner, don’t you think?”

You’re not given much time to answer, before Buck is licking a stripe up your folds, and suctioning your clit into his mouth.

As you pull on Buck’s curls to keep him in place, you’ve decided that you should always place bets, if it meant getting this lucky as a result. 

[redocity]

kinda emergency request. Okay so I’m super sick right now but I also had a lot to get done this week so I pushed through and ended up collapsing. It was a whole thing and I went to the hospital for a few days. I hadn’t eaten cause I was nauseous or slept because I was in pain. Any way would it be possible to get a Evan Buckley x reader on that. Sorry it’s a lot I know! But thank you!

PUSH THROUGH — E.BUCKLEY

Being sick and being a firefighter were two things that should never exist at the same time. when you push yourself a little too hard and end up collapsing, buck gets more than a little worried.

WARNINGS: gn!reader, sick reader, mentions of nausea and wanting to throw up, reader faints

evan buckley x reader || hurt/comfort || 3.0k || requests open!

a/n: i hope you’re alright and get better soon!

₊ ⊹ masterlist!!

Being a firefighter was hard. It consisted of long and physically taxing workdays, a lot of mental scarring, and most prominently, a lack of regular breaks.

Some days were okay, slow days where you only had three or four calls in a 12 hour shift, but on days like today, where you had spent a grand total of 35 minutes in the station in the last six hours —with the first 20 of those being before your shift even started— being a firefighter felt like you were living through your own personal hell.

“Hey—” Buck nudges you with his elbow, and you blink your eyes shortly before turning your gaze to him with a small hum, breaking yourself out of your dissociation of staring blankly across the lounge room.

“I’ve been calling your name for like a whole minute, are you okay?” Buck’s eyebrows furrow in an obvious concern for your well being, a dark line forming at the top of the bridge of his nose that you fight the urge to smooth out with the pad of your thumb.

You might have an unprofessional friendship with Buck, but even you knew what boundaries were unsafe to cross.

“Mhm, I’m fine,” Your voice is distant even to yourself, like there’s a layer of cotton coating the inside of your ears.

“You’re not though,” Buck presses the back of his hand against your forehead to feel for a temperature, and you swat it away lightly with a small shake of your head, something that does nothing in disproving Buck’s theory. “You’re all quiet and warm, and I can see your hands shaking,”

You clasp your hands together at the last part, interlocking your fingers and holding them securely in your lap so that they can’t move without your consent anymore. “I’m fine,”

He sighs at your continued dismissal. It was obvious that you weren’t okay, so why would you keep trying to pretend like you were? “Have you eaten anything yet? Maybe you should eat something, you know, replenish all of those nutrients or whatever,”

“Okay Dr Buckley, no need to treat me like a five year old,” You roll your eyes with a short laugh, and a small smile etches it’s way onto Buck’s face at the flicker of your usual personality shining through despite your current condition. “I’m not hungry right now—” Buck opens his mouth to argue, but you hold up your hand before he can get a word out. “—But, i’ll see about getting something after our next call okay?”

He lets out a short breath through his nose as he concedes defeat, leaning back against the lounge sofa dramatically. “Fine, but I will make sure of that,”

You hope he doesn’t.

You’d tried to make yourself a piece of dry, bland toast this morning to quell the growing ache in your stomach from how little you’d fed yourself over the last two days, but it ended up with you feeling so sick that you had to take almost ten minutes of your morning doing deep breathing exercises so that you wouldn’t throw it back up again. You didn’t fancy a round two of that.

“Yes sir,” You exaggerate your response through a mock salute, and he gives you a short laugh and a pat of his hand on your lower thigh, squeezing it lightly.

You take the end in the conversation to relax against the back of the sofa, but as soon as the back of your head meets the top of the cushion the alarm rings out and you curse your own downfall.

Buck gives your leg another pat as he stands, holding out his hand for you to take so he can help you to your feet, something which, although you would keep to yourself to stop him from worrying about you even more, you were grateful for in the wake of your staticed vision in the first few second of you standing upright.

—

It wasn’t the worst call in the world, some driver going 10 over the speed limit managed to swerve off the road, over a patch of grass, and land right into somebodies six foot hedge lining their yard. All you had to do was winch the car out and check that the driver didn’t have any injures. It took less than half an hour.

But by the time you climbed back into the truck you felt like you had absolutely no energy left whatsoever, your shoulders slumped and your head limply resting backwards against the headrest in fatigue.

You were just absolutely exhausted, probably not helped by the rough nights you’d been having because of the phantom pains that seemed to plague you whenever you moved so much as an inch.

You considered asking to stay at the station for the next call, or just asking to stay at the station for the rest of your shift entirely at this point. You weren’t sure you’d have the physical capacities to be of any help at all, and if you were to tag along you’d just be a nuisance to everybody else as they tried to do their jobs.

You didn’t have to make that decision yourself, your body made it for you.

Buck had been extra attentive to you on the call, and that didn’t end once the truck parked in the station, he climbed down the truck’s side ladders before you, turning to hold out his hand so you’d have an extra balance point if you needed it whilst climbing down, but instead he was met with your clouded gaze, literally watching the moment your consciousness seems to slip away from your body as your foot misses one of the steps and causes to stumble forward.

He catches your weight in his arms before you can hit the floor, a panicked “Cap!” echoing through the engine bay as he lowers you to lie on the floor with your head resting on his thighs, all colour drained from your face as your eyes flicker underneath your eyelids.

Hen and Chimney are at your side before Bobby is, but he’s not far behind as the rest of the team circle you in concern.

“What happened?” Hen furrows her eyebrows as she watches Chimney check your heart rate, tightening a blood pressure cuff around your arm.

“I don’t know they just collapsed—” Buck’s voice mirrors his expression it’s panic.

“105/70, alright, lay them down on the floor, Eddie, put your jacket underneath their feet,” Hen removes the blood pressure cuff as Buck and Eddie rush to follow her instructions, and her and Chimney share a nod as they both confirm you’re not in any medical danger.

“Are they okay?” Buck hesitates to lie your head on the concrete floor, so his leaves his hand as a barrier between you and the floor.

“They’re fine, it’s just hypotension, do you know if they’ve eaten or drank anything today?” Hen puts a comforting hand on Buck’s shoulder to help calm his panic as the adrenaline from your collapse slowly dissipates.

“I asked if they were hungry earlier and they said they’d eat something later,” Buck presses his lips into a line, feeling mildly guilty about not pushing you to eat something earlier when he had the chance to.

Your head twitches in his hand before he has the time to drill himself into a spiral over it, and soon enough you’re squeezing your eyes shut tighter before flickering them open.

“There you are, welcome back to the land of the living,” Chimney rubs your shoulder with his hand as you wake, and promptly pushes you back to lying flat when you try to sit up. “No, stay there, you’ll only pass out again if you sit up too quickly,”

“What happened?” You squint your eyes under the harsh overhead lights, covering them with the back of your hand.

“You collapsed on the way out of the truck, gave us all a scare there for a moment,” Bobby crosses his arms as he steps into your line of sight, tone carrying reprimand but his expression laced in concern.

“Right… sorry,”

“Don’t apologise,” Bobby shakes his head shortly, “When was the last time you ate?”

“Uh…” You don’t know whether it’s the fact that you’ve just fainted, or the weird angle you’re currently at that’s making you slower than usual. “This morning,”

“It’s almost 4pm—” Buck’s voice announces you of his presence like he hasn’t been protecting your head from the concrete for the last five minutes with his hand, and you crane your head backwards to look up at him.

“I felt sick, I didn’t want to throw up everywhere that’s gross,” You groan slightly as your neck begins to ache. “Can I sit up now?”

“Slowly,” Hen takes your hand as she carefully pulls you to sit upright, and Buck remains on his knees behind you in case you need to lie back down again. “How are you feeling? Still lightheaded?”

“A little,” You rub the knuckle of your thumb over your forehead in an attempt to alleviate some of the tension lingering there, and Hen hums.

“Alright, it’s time for you to eat,” Buck places both of his hands on your shoulders as he stands, squeezing them softly before extending a hand out to help you back onto your feet, which you take without complaint.

“Okay,”

You let Buck lead you up to the open lounge with mild guilt written across your face. Guilt and embarrassment at the fact that you’d passed out in front of everyone.

“Okay, so we’ve got tomato and onion pasta bake, left over macaroni and cheese, uh…” Buck rifles through the fridge for what’s left of different Bobby creations over the last few days. “Ooh there’s lasagna in here, I might have to keep that for myself,”

He knows it’s not the funniest thing he’s ever said, but when he turns back to check on you, the way you’re sat blankly staring at the table doesn’t spell anything good.

“Hey,” Buck abandons his fridge endeavours with a small sigh, walking over to put his hand on your shoulder. “Are you alright? Really?”

You barely so much as acknowledge him, giving him a small hum as you rest your forehead on the palms of your hands. “I think I should go home…”

Your tone causes the worry to flood back into his features. “You have to eat something…”

“I don’t know if I can stomach it right now,” You close your eyes momentarily, slumping forward so your entire upper body weight is resting against your hands. “I still feel sick,”

He can’t really argue with you about that. Nauseousness was a pain in the ass. But that didn’t mean you didn’t need something in your body to help whatever deficit you were going through right now.

He takes a moment to think through his options, biting the inside of his cheek. “Uh… What about a protein shake? I’m pretty sure I left a few packets here somewhere—” Buck leaves your side to look through some of the kitchenette cupboards for protein shake packets he’d stoad hidden from the team.

“Ah,” He makes a sound of triumph as he retrieves them, holding them up above his head as he’s crouched behind the kitchen island so you can see them. “We have…” He turns the packets in his hand one by one. “Chocolate, banana, vanilla, strawberry, and… blueberry, take your pick,”

You give him a look that tells him you’d rather not have any of them, and a worry line forms in his forehead once more. “Come on… It’s like a milkshake, and you can drink it as slow as you want,” He walks back over to you slowly, the packets held out in his hands towards you so you can choose one. “Please? You’re starting to worry me for real now,”

You begrudgingly take one of the packets from his hands with a small sigh. His concern was appreciated, but it was also mildly daunting. You didn’t like the way his face furrowed when he was concerned about you, it didn’t suit him like smiling did.

“Thank you,” He takes the packet back from you once you’ve chosen which one you want, leaving the others discarded on the table as he prepares the drink for you. “Drink this and then go home and get some rest okay? I’ll drop by your apartment after the shift is over to check on you, and if you still feel really bad then we should go to the hospital,” His words are spoken unevenly as the exertion from shaking the drink canister reaches his vocal chords.

“I don’t need to go to the hospital Buck, I’m fine, i’ve just got the flu or something and pushed myself too hard,” You shake your head adamantly at his suggestion, and he mirrors it himself as he pours the drink into a glass and puts it on the table in front of you.

“Some people go to the hospital when they’ve got the flu and don’t push themselves too hard,” He points at the glass once it’s on the table. “Drink it,”

You oblige with a roll of your eyes, your first sip barely even considered one as you try and force yourself to swallow it through the invisible blockade in your throat.

“And maybe try and take a nap or something? You look exhausted,”

“Oh thanks, that makes me feel so much better,” a your voice is dripping with sarcasm, and it leaves a small smile on Buck’s face.

“You know what I mean,” He shakes his head lightly as he stashes away the remaining protein shake packets. “How much sleep did you get last night anyway?”

He asks you the question right as you go to take another sip of the shake, and you force yourself to swallow it uncomfortably to answer him. “Maybe like three hours? I had a really bad migraine and my lower back was hurting,”

Buck sighs loudly as he pulls out a chair to sit behind you, and he opens his mouth to say something, but you beat him to it.

“I know I know, that’s not good, i’ll work on it okay?”

“That’s all I can ask,” He gives you a small smile with a shrug of his shoulders.

—

You didn’t have to think about complying to Buck’s suggestion of going home, and after a long hour of trying to digest the protein shake in front of you, that’s exactly what you did.

The station felt remarkably quieter without you there, but that was arguably because everyone was still shrouded in a combined worry for your well being that left them more solemn than usual, their usual banter getting lost in the process.

Once the shift was over, Buck kept his word in heading straight to your apartment, knocking the door with no answer.

He questions whether he got the number right at first, but he’s been to your apartment enough times to know that he hasn’t just stumbled to the wrong door. And the longer it stays shut in his face the more worried he gets.

So he tries the door handle, and it opens, meaning you’d left your apartment unlocked.

He calls your name a few times as he walks in, a small rush of adrenaline making its way through his veins at the slight possibility that something could’ve happened in the few hours since you’d been home alone.

A small breath of relief escapes him as he finds you.

You were circled up into yourself on your couch, TV left on standby as you slept in what Buck assumed to be an extremely deep sleep.

How you manage to make that tiny sofa look like the most comfortable place in the world he doesn’t know, but you seem to be more than happy wedged into the corner with a decorative pillow clutched tightly against your chest.

It’s a welcome sight after everything you’d been through today, and Buck rifles around to find a blanket to throw over you before taking a seat on the other end of the couch and settling in for an evening of watching random movies on your TV until you woke up.

Even if that meant him staying overnight.

[ruewrote]

𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑦𝑜𝑢.

PAIRING: evan buckley x fem!reader WARNINGS: worries of future of relationship, no use of y/n GENRE: angst to fluff SONG INSPIRATION: based off of tightrope by michelle williams WORD COUNT: 1.5k REQUESTED: yes

navigation | ask | evan buckley masterlist

you always knew loving buck wasn’t going to be simple. he was magnetic in a way that pulled you in, but with that same intensity meant there was always something just outside of your reach. a sense of unpredictability. 

from the moment you met him, there was a charge that made everything with him feel alive. the late night conversations, the lazy mornings, the spontaneous laughter. it was all beautiful, but it was never easy. not with his job, not with the constant risks he took every single day.

and yet, here you were.

tonight, that all too familiar feeling crept back in, that gnawing unease you’d been trying to push down. buck wasn’t home yet. you sat on the couch, staring at the clock as it ticked away the minutes, trying to ignore the worst case scenarios playing on repeat in your mind. it was past midnight, and your phone was quiet. too quiet.

this wasn’t the first time you’d sat in the dark, wondering if he was okay, wondering if tonight would be the night he didn’t come home. that was the reality of loving someone like buck. someone who ran toward the danger, who put himself in harm’s way for others. you admired that about him, the way he cared so deeply, but sometimes it left you hopeless.

a sigh escaped your lips as you ran a hand through your hair, the tension building in your chest. you hated this feeling, hated waiting like this. most of the time, you could manage it, push it to the back of your mind. but tonight? tonight felt different. maybe because of how late it was or the heavy silence in the apartment, but something inside you twisted painfully as the seconds dragged on.

just as you were about to grab your phone and text him again, the sound of keys in the lock jolted you out of your thoughts. the door opened slowly and buck stepped inside, his shoulders slumping with exhaustion. relief flooded through you at the sight of him, he was okay. he was safe. but the knot in your chest didn’t unravel right away.

“hey,” he said softly, closing the door behind him and tossing his keys on the entryway table. he looked worn out, his face smudged with soot, his hair a mess. “i’m sorry i’m late.”

you swallowed the lump in your throat, trying to keep your voice steady. “you didn’t text,” you said, sharper than you meant to. it wasn’t anger, more like the fear spilling out before you could control it.

buck’s brow furrowed as he walked toward you. “i know. i’m sorry. we had a crazy call, and i didn’t have a chance to check my phone. i should’ve texted as soon as i could. i didn’t mean to make you worry.”

the apology should have been enough, but the words didn’t soothe the ache you’d been carrying. you stood up from the couch, crossing your arms over your chest as you looked at him. “i know you can’t always text me, buck. i get that. but…you don’t understand what it’s like sitting here, not knowing if something’s happened to you. not knowing if you’re okay.”

his expression softened, and he reached for your hand, but you pulled away, stepping back. the space between you suddenly felt wider, like there was something unspoken lingering there, something neither of you had addressed yet.

“i can’t keep doing this,” you whispered, your voice wavering despite your best efforts to keep it steady. “every time you walk out that door, i wonder if it’s going to be the last time and tonight… tonight i couldn’t shake the feeling that something had happened.”

buck’s face fell, and he looked down at the floor, guilt flashing in his eyes. “i’m sorry,” he repeated, quieter this time. he took a deep breath, his voice thick with regret. “i didn’t mean to scare you. i didn’t–”

“it’s not just tonight,” you cut in, shaking your head. the frustration in your chest bubbled up before you could stop it. “it’s every night. every time you go on a call. i’m terrified, buck. terrified that one day you won’t come home. and i don’t know how much longer i can handle it.”

there. you’d said it. the words hung heavy in the air between you, and the silence that followed felt deafening.

buck looked up at you then, his eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite read. guilt? pain? he took a step closer, his hands reaching out for you again, but this time, you didn’t pull away. his fingers wrapped around yours, warm and familiar, grounding you in the moment.

“i know,” he whispered, his voice barely above a breath. “i know it’s hard. i know i don’t always make it easy for you.” he paused, searching for the right words. “but i love what i do and i love you. i don’t know how to make you feel better about this, about any of it, but i promise you, i’m always going to do everything i can to come back to you.”

you blinked back the tears threatening to spill over, your heart aching at the sincerity in his voice. “but what if one day you can’t?” you asked, your voice cracking. “what if one day something happens and you don’t come back?”

his grip on your hand tightened, and he pulled you closer, his free hand coming up to cup your cheek. “i can’t promise you that nothing will ever happen,” he said softly, his thumb brushing across your skin in a gentle, comforting motion. “i wish i could, but you know i can’t. but what i can promise is that i’ll always fight to come back. no matter what.”

you felt a tear slip down your cheek, and buck wiped it away with his thumb, his eyes never leaving yours. there was so much emotion there, so much love, fear, and vulnerability and for a moment, you didn’t know what to say.

“i don’t want to lose you,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

“you won’t,” he replied, his voice firm but gentle. “i’m right here. i’m always going to be right here.”

he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you against his chest, and you let yourself sink into him. his warmth, his strength. it was all so familiar, so comforting, and for a moment, the fear melted away. you could hear the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your ear, and it grounded you, tethered you to this moment.

you didn’t know how long you stayed like that, wrapped up in each other, but eventually, you pulled back just enough to look up at him. his hands slid down to rest on your waist, his fingers tracing small, absentminded circles on your skin.

“i hate that i’m so scared all the time,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “but i love you, buck. so much. and that’s why it’s so hard.”

he nodded, his eyes softening as he leaned down to press his forehead against yours. “i know,” he said quietly. “and i’m sorry i’ve made it harder. i don’t always think about what it’s like for you, waiting here, wondering. but i swear, i’ll try to be better. i’ll do whatever i can to make this easier for you.”

you closed your eyes, letting his words wash over you. it was a promise, one you knew buck would keep. he was reckless at times, but he was also loyal to a fault. if he said he’d try, you believed him.

“i just need you to talk to me,” you said softly. “let me in when you’re scared or when something’s bothering you. don’t just keep it to yourself.”

buck smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he nodded. “deal. but only if you promise me the same thing.”

you let out a soft laugh, your chest feeling a little lighter now. “okay. deal.”

he leaned down and kissed you then, slow and sweet, like he was savoring the moment. when he pulled back, there was a quiet intensity in his gaze that made your heart skip a beat.

“i love you,” he said, his voice thick with emotion. “and i’m not going anywhere. you’re stuck with me, whether you like it or not.”

you smiled, feeling a wave of warmth wash over you. “i like it,” you whispered, wrapping your arms around his neck. “i love you, too.”

later that night, you lay in bed with buck beside you, his arm draped over your waist, holding you close. the soft rise and fall of his chest was soothing, a quiet reminder that he was here, safe and sound. you pressed yourself closer to him, letting the warmth of his body chase away the lingering fear that had settled in your bones earlier.

buck shifted beside you, his fingers brushing against your arm as he spoke, his voice low and sleepy. “i know it’s hard,” he murmured. “but we’ll figure it out. together.”

you nodded, your heart full as you closed your eyes. “yeah,” you whispered. “together.”

and for now, that was enough.

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