#dan immediately coming back with the entire timeline of how he ended up with all these lamps

[ex0tic-butters]

prompt: what was the worst gift you've ever received?

[innuendostudios]

I was invited to give a talk on GamerGate over Zoom in early 2021. I've long been frustrated that there isn't a good timeline of GG and its origins on YouTube. When people ask "what the hell was GG anyway?" they often get referred to my or Dan Olson's videos on the subject, but both of them were made while GG was ongoing, and presumed a degree of familiarity on the part of the audience. There was just too much to say about what was already happening to spend time getting the audience up to speed, and it was safe to assume our audiences had enough context to follow along. But time moves fast on the internet, and many people who now care about such things weren't there while it was happening, and are lacking the necessary context to follow the better videos. For a long time, I've only been able to direct them to RationalWiki's timeline, which is excellent but so exhaustively comprehensive that it's likely to scare off first-timers.

I realize an hourlong lecture isn't necessarily helping matters, but the first 20-or-so minutes of this video are my attempt at streamlining the timeline such that people can be up to speed on the most important stuff fairly quickly. The rest is talking about what it all meant, how it prefigured the Alt-Right, and using it to better understand digital radicalization.

This video was made with the help of Magdalen Rose, who edited the slides to the audio while I was laid up with a back injury. Go sub to her channel! And please back me on Patreon.

Transcript below the cut.

FUCKING VIDEO GAMES? FUCKING VIDEO GAMES. THEY MADE DOZENS OF PEOPLE MISERABLE FOR YEARS OVER VIDEO GAMES! NOT EVEN FUCKING VIDEO GAMES, FUCKING ARTICLES ABOUT FUCKING VIDEO GAMES. THIS IS WHAT PASSES FOR LEGITIMATE GRIEVANCE. ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS SHIT??

Hi! My name is Ian Danskin. I’m a video essayist and media artist. I run the YouTube channel Innuendo Studios, please like share and subscribe.

I’m here to talk to you about GamerGate, and I needed to get all that out of the way. I’m going to talk about what GamerGate was and how it prefigured The Alt-Right, and there are gonna be moments where you’re nodding along with me, going, “yeah, yeah I get it,” and then the sun’s gonna break through a crack in the wall and you’ll suddenly remember that all this is happening because some folks - mostly ladies - said some stuff - provably true stuff, I might add - about video games and a bunch of guys didn’t like it, and you’re gonna want to rip your hair out. By the end of this, you will have a better understanding of what happened, but it will never not be bullshit.

Also, oh my god, content warning. Racism, sexism, antisemitism, homophobia, transphobia, rape threats, threats of violence, domestic abuse - I’m not going to depict or describe at length any of the worst stuff, but it’s all in the mix. So if at any point you need to switch me off or mute me, you have my blessing.

Brace yourselves.

Some quick prehistory:

In 2012, feminist media critic Anita Sarkeesian ran a Kickstarter campaign for a YouTube series on sexist tropes in video games. And, partway through the campaign, 4chan found it and said “let’s ruin her life.” And a lot of the male general gaming public joined in. And by “ruin her life” I’m not talking 150 angry tweets including dozens of rape and death threats per week, though that was a thing. I’m talking bomb threats. I’m talking canceled speaking engagements because someone threatened to shoot up a school. I’m talking FBI investigation. The harassers faced no meaningful repercussions.

And in 2013, Zoe Quinn released Depression Quest, a free text game about living with depression. They received harassment off and on for the next year, most pointedly from an incel forum called Wizardchan that doxxed their phone number and made harassing phone calls telling them to kill themself. The harassers faced no meaningful repercussions.

(Also, quick note: Zoe Quinn is nonbinary and has come out since the events in question. When I call Zoe’s harassment misogynist, understand I am not calling Zoe a woman, but they were attacked by people who hate women because that’s how they were perceived. Had they been out at the time things probably would’ve gone down similarly, but on top of misogyny I’d be talking about nonbinary erasure and transphobia.)

Okay. Our story begins in August 2014. The August that never ended.

Depression Quest, after a prolonged period on Greenlight, finally releases on Steam as a free download with the option to pay what you want. In the days that follow, Zoe’s ex-boyfriend, Eron Gjoni, writes a nearly 10,000-word blog called The Zoe Post, in which he claims Quinn had been a shitty and unfaithful partner. (For reference, 10,000 words is long enough that the Hugos would consider it a novelette.) This is posted to forums on Penny Arcade and Something Awful, both of which immediately take it down, finding it, at best, a lot of toxic hearsay and, at worse, an invitation to harassment. So Gjoni workshops the post, adds a bunch of edgelord humor (and I am using the word “humor” very generously), and reposts it to three different subforums on 4chan.

We’re not going to litigate whether Zoe Quinn was a good partner. I don’t know or care. I don’t think anyone on this call is trying to date them so I’m not sure that’s our business. What is known is that the relationship lasted five months, and, after it ended, Gjoni began stalking Quinn. Gjoni has, in fact, laid out how he stalked Quinn in meticulous detail to interviewers and why he feels it was justified. It’s also been corroborated by a friend that Quinn briefly considered taking him back at a games conference in San Francisco, but he became violent during sex and Quinn left the apartment in the middle of the night with visible bruises.

Off of the abusive ex-boyfriend’s post, 4chan decides it’s going to make Zoe Quinn one of their next targets, and starts a private IRC channel to plan the campaign. The channel is called #BurgersAndFries, a reference to Gjoni claiming Quinn had cheated on him with five guys. A couple sentences in The Zoe Post - which Gjoni would later claim were a typo - imply that one of the five guys was games journalist Nathan Grayson and that Quinn had slept with him in exchange for a good review of Depression Quest. Given the anger that they’d seen drummed up against women in games with the previous Anita Sarkeesian hate mob, #BurgersAndFries decides to focus on this breach of “ethics in games journalism” as a cover story, many of them howling with laughter at the thought that male gamers would probably buy it. This way, destroying Quinn’s life and career and turning their community against them would appear an unfortunate byproduct of a legitimate consumer revolt; criticism of the harassment could even be framed as a distraction from the bigger issue. Gjoni himself is in the IRC channel telling them that this was the best hand to play.

The stated aim of many on #BurgersAndFries was to convince Quinn to commit suicide.

Two regulars in the IRC, YouTubers MundaneMatt and Internet Aristocrat, make videos about The Zoe Post. Incidentally, both these men had already made a lot of money off videos about Anita Sarkeesian. Matt’s is swiftly taken down with a DMCA claim, and he says that Quinn filed the claim themself. (For the record, in those days, YouTube didn’t tell you who filed DMCA claims against you.) Members of the IRC also reach out to YouTuber TotalBiscuit, who had been critical of Sarkeesian and dismissive of her harassment, and he tweets the story to his 350,000 followers, saying a game developer trading sex for a good review might not prove true, but was certainly plausible.

This is where GamerGate begins to get public traction.

Zoe Quinn is very swiftly doxxed, with their phone number, home address, nudes, and names and numbers of their family collected. Gjoni himself leaks their birth name. The Zoe Post, and the movement against Quinn - now dubbed “The Quinnspiracy” - make it to The Escapist and Reddit, which mods will have little luck removing. The Quinnspiracy declares war on any site that does take their threads down, most vehemently NeoGAF. People who defend Zoe against the harassment start getting doxxed themselves - Fez developer Phil Fish is doxxed so thoroughly, hackers get access to the root folder of his website.

In what I’m going to call This Should Have Been The End, Part 1, Stephen Totilo, Editor-in-Chief at Kotaku where Nathan Grayson worked, in response to pressure not just from The Quinnspiracy but an increasing number of angry gamers buying The Quinnspiracy’s narrative, publishes a story. In it he verifies that Quinn and Grayson did date for several months, and that not only is there no review of Depression Quest anywhere on Kotaku, not by Grayson nor anyone else, but that Grayson did not write a single word about Quinn the entire time they were dating.

In response, The Quinnspiracy declares war on Kotaku. r/KotakuinAction is formed, which will become the primary site of organization outside of chanboards. The fact that their entire “movement” is based on a review that does not exist changes next to nothing.

Some people start to see The Quinnspiracy as potentially profitable. The Fine Young Capitalists get involved, a group ostensibly working to get women into video games but who have a Byzantine plan to do so wherein they crowdfund the budget and the woman who wins a competition gets to storyboard a game, but another company will make and she will get 8% of the profits, the rest going to a charity chosen by the top donor. 4chan becomes the top donor. They like TFYC because the head of the company has a vendetta against Zoe Quinn, who had previously called them out for their transphobic submission policy, and he falsely accused Quinn of having once doxxed him. 4chan feels backing an ostensibly feminist effort will be good PR, but can’t resist selecting a colon cancer charity because, they say, feminism is cancer and they want to be the cure to butthurt. They also get to design a character for the game, and so they create Vivian James, who will become the GamerGate mascot.

Manosphere YouTubers Jordan Owen and Davis Aurini launch a Patreon campaign for their antifeminist documentary The Sarkeesian Effect and come to The Quinnspiracy looking for $15,000 a month for an indefinite period to make it, which they get.

In what will prove genuinely awful timing, Anita Sarkeesian releases the second episode of Tropes vs. Women in Video Games, and, despite not being a games journalist and having nothing to do with Quinn or Grayson, she is immediately roped into the narrative about how feminists are ruining games culture and becomes the second major target of harassment. Both she and Quinn soon have to leave their houses after having receiving dozens and dozens of death threats that include their home addresses.

After being courted by members of the IRC channel, Firefly star Adam Baldwin tweets a link to one of the Quinnspiracy videos and coins the hashtag #GamerGate. This is swiftly adopted by all involved.

In response to all this, Leigh Alexander writes a piece for Gamasutra arguing that the identity that these men are flocking to the “ethics in games journalism” narrative to defend no longer matters as a marketing demographic. Gaming and games culture is so large and so varied, and the “core gamer” audience of 18-34 white bros growing smaller and septic, that there was no reason, neither morally nor financially, to treat them as the primary audience anymore. Love of gaming is eternal, but, she declared, “gamers,” as an identity, “are over.” Eight more articles contextualizing GamerGate alongside misogyny and the gatekeeping of games culture come out across several websites in the following days. GamerGate frames these as a clear sign of [deep sigh] collusion to oppress gamers, proving that ethics in games journalism is, indeed, broken, and Leigh Alexander becomes the third major target of harassment. These become known as the “gamers are dead” articles - a phrase not one of them uses - and they make “get Leigh Alexander fired from Gamasutra” one of their primary goals.

Something I need you to understand is that it has, at this point, been two weeks.

Highlights from the next little bit: Alex Macris, a higher up at The Escapist’s parent company, expresses support for GamerGate; he will go on to write the first positive coverage at a major publication and cement The Escapist as GamerGate-friendly. Mike Cernovich, aka “Based Lawyer,” gets GamerGate’s attention by mocking Anita Sarkeesian; he will go on to hire a private investigator to stalk Zoe Quinn. GamerGate launches Operation Disrespectful Nod, an email campaign pressuring companies to pull advertising from websites that have criticized them. They leverage their POC members, getting them, any time someone points out the rampant racism and antisemitism among GamerGaters, to say “I am a person of color and I am #NotYourShield”; most of these “POC members” are fake accounts left over from a previous, racist disinformation campaign. Milo Yiannapoulos gets involved, writing positive coverage of GG despite having mocked gamers for precisely this behavior in the past, and gets so much traffic it pulls Breitbart News out of obscurity and makes it a significant player in modern conservative news media.

[Hey! Ian from the future here. This talk mostly addresses how GamerGate prefigured the Alt-Right strategically and philosophically, but if you want a more explicit, material connection: Breitbart News took its newfound notoriety to become, as its Executive Chair phrased it in 2016, "a platform for the Alt-Right." That Executive Chair was Steve Bannon, who threw the website's weight behind The Future President Who Shall Not Be Named, and, upon getting his attention, would then go on to become his campaign strategist and work in his Administration. So, if you're wondering how one of the central figures of the Alt-Right ended up in the White House, the answer is literally "GamerGate." Back to you, Ian from the past!]

In what I’m calling This Should Have Been The End, Part 2, Zoe Quinn announces that they have been lurking the #BurgersAndFries IRC channel since the beginning and releases dozens of screenshots showing harassment being planned and the selection of “ethics in games journalism” as a cover. #BurgersAndFries has a meltdown, everyone turns on each other, and the channel is abandoned. And they then start another IRC and things proceed.

It goes on like this. I’m not gonna cover everything. This is just the first month. It should be clear by now that this thing is kind of unkillable. And I worry I haven’t made it obvious that this is not just a chanboard and an IRC. Thousands of regular, every day gamers were buying the story and joining in. They were angry, and no amount of evidence that their anger was unfounded was going to change that. You could not mention or even allude to GamerGate and not get flooded with dozens, even hundreds of furious replies. These replies always included the hashtag so everyone monitoring it could join in, so all attempts at real conversation devolved into a hundred forking threads where some people expected you to talk to them while others hurled insults and slurs. And always the possibility that, if any one of them didn’t like what you said, you’d be the next target.

To combat this, some progressives offered up the hashtag #GameEthics to the people getting swept up in GamerGate, saying, “look, we get that you’re angry, and if you want to talk about ethics in games journalism, we can totally do that, but using your hashtag is literally putting us in danger; they calling the police on people saying there’s a hostage situation at their home addresses so they get sent armed SWAT teams, and if you’ll just use this other hashtag we can have the conversation you say you want to have in safety.” And I will ever stop being salty about what happened.

They refused. They wouldn’t cede any ground to what they saw as their opposition. It was so important to have the conversation on their terms that not only did they refuse to use #GameEthics, they spammed it with furry porn so no one could use it.

A few major events on the timeline before we move on: Christina Hoff Sommers, the Republican Party’s resident “feminist,” comes out criticizing Anita Sarkeesian and becomes a major GG figurehead, earning the title Based Mom. Zoe Quinn gets a restraining order against Eron Gjoni, which he repeatedly violates, to no consequence; GG will later crowdfund his legal fees. There’s this listserv called GameJournoPros where game journalists would talk about their jobs, and many are discussing their concerns over GamerGate, so Milo Yiannopoulos leaks it and this is framed as further “proof of collusion.” 4chan finally starts enforcing its “no dox�� rules and shuts GamerGate threads down, so they migrate to 8chan, a site famous for hosting like a lot of child porn. Indie game developer Brianna Wu makes a passing joke about GamerGate on Twitter and they decide, seemingly on a whim, to make her one of the biggest targets in the entire movement; she soon has to leave her home as well. GamerGate gets endorsements from WikiLeaks, Infowars, white nationalist sites Stormfront and The Daily Stormer, and professional rapist RooshV. And hundreds of people get doxxed; an 8chan subforum called Baphomet is created primarily to host dox of GamerGate’s critics.

But by November, GamerGate popularity was cresting, as more and more mainstream media covered it negatively. Their last, big spike in popularity came when Anita Sarkeesian went on The Colbert Report and Stephen made fun of the movement. Their numbers never recovered after that.

Which is not to say GamerGate ended. It slowed down. The period of confusion where the mainstream world couldn’t tell whether it was a legitimate movement or not passed. But, again, most harassers faced no meaningful repercussions. Gamers who bought the lie about “ethics in games journalism” stayed mad that no one had ever taken them seriously, and harassers continued to grief their targets for years. The full timeline of GamerGate is an constant cycle of lies, harassment, operations, grift, and doxxing. Dead-enders are to this day still using the hashtag. And remember how Anita had nothing to do with ethics in games journalism or Zoe Quinn, and they just roped her in because they’d enjoyed harassing her before so why not? Every one of GamerGate’s targets knows that they may get dragged into some future harassment campaign just because. It’s already happened to several of them. They’re marked.

(sigh) Let’s take a breath.

Now that we know what GamerGate was, let’s talk about why it worked.

In the thick of GamerGate, I started compiling a list of tactics I saw them using. I wanted to make a video essay that was one part discussion of antifeminist backlash, and one part list of techniques these people use so we can better recognize and anticipate their behavior. That first part became six parts and the second part went on a back burner. It would eventually become my series, The Alt-Right Playbook. GamerGate is illustrative because most of what would become The Alt-Right Playbook was in use.

Two foundational principles of The Alt-Right Playbook are Control the Conversation and Never Play Defense. Make sure people are talking about what you want them to talk about, and take an aggressive posture so you look dominant even when you’re not making sense. For instance: once Zoe leaked the IRC chatlogs, a reasonable person could tell the average gater, “the originators of GamerGate were planning harassment from the very beginning.” But the gater would say, “you’re cherry-picking; not everyone was a harasser.”

Now, this is a bad argument - that’s not how you use “cherry-picking” - and it’s being framed as an accusation - you’re not just wrong, you’re dishonest - which makes you wanna defend yourself. But, if you do - if you tell them why that argument is crap - you’ve let the conversation move from “did the IRC plan harassment?” - a question of fact - to “are the harassers representative of the movement?” - a question of ethics. Like, yes, they are, but only within a certain moral framework. An ethics question has no provable answer, especially if people are willing to make a lot of terrible arguments. It is their goal to move any question with a definitive answer to a question of philosophy, to turn an argument they can’t win into an argument nobody can win.

The trick is to treat the question you asked like it’s already been answered and bait you into addressing the next question. By arguing about whether you’re cherry-picking, you’re accepting the premise that whether you’re cherry-picking is even relevant. Any time this happens, it’s good to pause and ask, “what did we just skip over?” Because that will tell you a lot.

What you skipped over is their admission that, yes, the IRC did plan harassment, but that’s only on them if most of the movement was in on it. Which is a load of crap - the rest of the IRC saw it happening, let it happen, it’s not like anybody warned Zoe, and shit, I’m having the cherry-picking argument! They got me! You see how tempting it is? But presumably the reason you brought the harassment up is because you want them to do something about it. At the very least, leave the movement, but ideally try and stop it. They don’t, strictly speaking, need to feel personally responsible to do that. And you might be thinking, well, maybe if I can get them take responsibility then they’ll do something, but you’d be falling for a different technique I call I Hate Mondays.

This is where people will acknowledge a terrible thing is happening, maybe even agree it’s bad, but they don’t believe anything can be done about it. They also don’t believe you believe anything can be done about it. Mondays suck, but they come around every week. This is never stated outright, but it’s why you’re arguing past each other. To them, the only reason to talk about the bad thing is to assign blame. Whose turn is it to get shit on for the unsolvable problem? Their argument about cherry-picking amounts to “1-2-3 not it.” And they are furious with you for trying to make them responsible for harassment they didn’t participate in.

The unspoken argument is that harassment is part of being on the internet. Every public figure deals with it. This ignores any concept of scale - why does one person get harassed more than another? - but you can’t argue with someone who views it as a binary: harassment either happens or it doesn’t, and, if it does, it’s a fact of life, and, if it happens to everyone, it’s not gendered. And this is not a strongly-held belief they’ve come to after years of soul-searching - this is what they’ve just decided they believe. They want to participate in GamerGate despite knowing its purpose, and this is what would need to be true for that to be ok.

Or maybe they’re just fucking with you! Maybe you can’t tell. Maybe they can’t tell, either. I call this one The Card Says Moops, where people say whatever they feel will score points in an argument and are so irony-poisoned they have no idea whether they actually believe it. A very useful trick if the thing you appear to believe is unconscionable. You can’t take what people like that say at face value; you can only intuit their beliefs from their actions. They say they believe this one minute and that another, but their behavior is always in accordance with that, not this.

In the negative space, their belief is, “The harassment of these women is okay. My anger about video games is more important. I may not be harassing them myself, but they do kind of deserve it.” They will never say this out loud in a serious conversation, though many will say it in an anonymous or irreverent space where they can later deny they meant it. But, whatever they say they believe, this is the worldview they are operating under.

Obscuring this means flipping through a lot of contradictory arguments. The harassment is being faked, or it’s not being faked but it’s being exaggerated, or it’s not being exaggerated but the target is provoking it to get attention, which means GamerGate harassers simultaneously don’t exist, exist in small numbers, and exist in such large numbers someone can build a career out of relying on them! It can be kind of fun to take all these arguments made in isolation and try to string together an actual position. Like, GamerGate would argue that Nathan Grayson having previously mentioned Zoe Quinn in an article about a canceled reality show counts as positive coverage, and since Grayson reached out to Quinn for comment it’s reasonable to assume they started dating before the article was published (which is earlier than they claim), and positive coverage did lead to greater popularity for Depression Quest. But if you untangle that, it’s like… okay, you’re saying Zoe Quinn slept with a journalist in exchange for four nonconsecutive sentences that said no more than “Zoe Quinn exists and made a game,” and the price of those four sentences was to date the journalist for months, all to get rich off a game that didn’t cost any money. That’s your movement?

And some, if cornered, would say, “yes, we believe women are just that shitty, that one would fuck a guy for months if it made them the tiniest bit more famous.” But they won’t lead with that. Because they know it won’t convince the normies, even the ones who want to be convinced. So they use a process I call The Ship of Theseus to, piece by piece, turn that sentence into “slept with a journalist in exchange for a good review” and argue that each part of the sentence is technically accurate. It’s trying to lie without lying. And, provided all the pieces of this sentence are discussed separately, and only in the context of how they justify this sentence, you can trick yourself into believing this sentence is mostly true.

So, like, why? This is clearly motivated reasoning; what’s the motivation? What was this going to accomplish?

The answer is nothing. Nothing, by design. GamerGate’s “official” channels - the subreddit and the handful of forums that didn’t shut them down - were rigidly opposed to any action more organized than an email campaign. They had a tiny handful of tangible demands - they wanted gaming websites to post public ethics policies and had a list of people they wanted fired - but their larger aim was the sea change in how games journalism operated, which nothing they were asking for could possibly give them. The kind of anger that convinces you this is a true statement is not going to be addressed by a few paragraphs about ethics and Leigh Alexander getting a new job. They wanted gaming sites to stop catering to women and “SJWs” - who were a sizable and growing source of traffic - and to get out of the pockets of companies that advertised on their websites - which was their primary source of income. So all Kotaku had to do to make them happy was solve capitalism!

Meanwhile, the unofficial channels, like 8chan and Baphomet, were planning op after op to get private information, spread lies with fake accounts, get disinformation trending, make people quit jobs, cancel gigs, and flee their homes. Concrete goals with clear results. All you had to do to feel productive was go rogue. In my video,

How to Radicalize a Normie, I describe how the Alt-Right encourages lone wolf behavior by whipping people up into a rage and then refusing to give them anything to do, while surrounding them with examples of people taking matters into their own hands. The same mechanism is in play here: the public-facing channels don’t condone harassment but also refuse to fight it, the private channels commit it under cover of anonymity, and there is a free flow of traffic between them for when the official channels’ impotence becomes unbearable.

What I hope I’m illustrating is how these techniques play off of each other, how they create a closed ecosystem that rational thought cannot enter. There’s a phrase we use on the internet that got thrown around a lot at the time:

you can’t logic someone out of a position they didn’t logic themselves into.

Now, there are a few other big topics I think are relevant here, so I want to go through them one by one.

MEMEIFICATION

So a lot of interactions with GamerGate would involve a very insular knowledge base.

Like, you’d say something benign but progressive on Twitter.

A gater would show up in your mentions and say something aggressive and false.

You’d correct them. But then they’d come back and hit you with -

ah shit, sorry, this is a Loss meme.

If I were in front of a classroom I’d ask, show of hands, how many of you got that? I had to ask Twitter recently, does Gen Z know about Loss?!

If you don’t know what Loss is I’m not sure I can explain it to you. It’s this old, bad webcomic that was parodied so, so, so many times

that it was reduced to its barest essentials, to the point where any four panels with shapes in this arrangement is a Loss meme. For those of you in the know, you will recognize this anywhere, but have you ever tried to explain to someone who wasn’t in the know why this is really fuckin’ funny?

So, now… by the same process that this is a comics joke,

this is a rape joke.

I’m not gonna show the original image, but, once upon a time, someone made an animated GIF of the character Piccolo from Dragon Ball Z graphically raping Vegeta. 4chan loved it so much that it got posted daily, became known as the “daily dose,” until mods started deleting every incident of it. So they uploaded slightly edited version of it. Then they started uploading other images that had been edited with Piccolo’s color scheme. It got so abstracted that eventually any collection of purple and green pixels would be recognized as Piccolo Dick.

Apropos of nothing, GamerGate is a movement that insists it is not sexist in nature and it does not condone threats of rape against the women they don’t like. And this is their logo. This is their mascot.

If you’re familiar with the Daily Dose, the idea that GamerGate would never support Eron Gjoni if they believed he was a sexual abuser is so blatantly insincere it’s insulting… but imagine trying to explain to someone who’s not on 4chan how this sweater is a rape joke. Imagine having to explain it to a journalist. Imagine having to explain it to the judge enforcing your abuser’s restraining order.

Reactionaries use meme culture not just because they’re terminally online but also because it makes their behavior seem either benign or just confusing to outsiders. They find it hilarious that they can be really explicit and still fly under the radar. The Alt-Right did this with Pepe the Frog, the OK sign, even the milk glass emoji for a hot minute. The more inexplicable the meme, the better. You get the point where Stephen Miller is flashing Nazi signs from the White House and the Presidential re-eletion campaign is releasing 88 ads of exactly 14 words and there’s still a debate about whether the administration is racist. Because journalists aren’t going to get their heads around that. You tell them “1488 is a Nazi number,” it’s gonna seem a lot more plausible that you’re making shit up.

MOVE FAST AND BREAK THINGS

Online movements like GamerGate move at a speed and mutation rate too high for the mainstream world to keep up. And not just that they don’t understand the memes - they don’t understand the infrastructure.

In an attempt to cover GamerGate evenhandedly, George Wiedman of Super Bunnyhop interviewed a lawyer who specializes in journalistic ethics. He meant well; I really wish he hadn’t. You can see him trying to fit something like GamerGate into terms this silver-haired man who works in copyright law can understand. At one point he asks if it’s okay to fund the creative project of a potential journalistic source, to which the guy understandably says “no.”

What he’s alluding to here is the harassment of Jenn Frank. A few weeks into GamerGate, Jenn Frank writes a piece in The Guardian about sexism in tech that mentions Anita Sarkeesian and Zoe Quinn. In another case of “here’s a strongly-held belief I just decided I have,” GamerGate says this is a breach of journalistic ethics because Frank backs Quinn on Patreon. They harass her so intensely she not only has to quit her job at The Guardian, for several months she quits journalism entirely.

Off the bat, calling a public figure central to a major event in the field a “journalistic source” is flatly wrong-headed. Quinn was not interviewed or even contacted for the article, they were in no way a “source”; they were a subject. But I want to talk about this phrase, “fund a creative project.” Patreon is functionally a subscription; it’s a way of buying things. It’s technically accurate that Frank is funding Quinn’s creative project, but only in the sense that you are funding Bob Dylan’s creative project if you listen to his music. And saying Frank therefore can’t write about Quinn is like saying a music journalist can’t cover a Bob Dylan concert if they’ve ever bought his albums.

And we could talk about the ways that Patreon, as compared with other funding models, can create a greater sense of intimacy, and we also could comment that, well, that’s how an increasing number of people consume media now, so that perspective should be present in journalism. But maybe it means we should cover that perspective differently? I don’t know. It’s an interesting subject. But none of that’s going on in this conversation because this guy doesn’t know what Patreon is. It was only a year old at this point. Patreon’s been a primary source of my income for 5 years and my parents still don’t know what it is. (I think they think I’m a freelancer?) This guy hears “funding a creative project” and he’s thinking an investor, someone who makes a profit off the source’s success.

The language of straight society hasn’t caught up with what’s happening, and that works in GamerGate’s favor.

In the years since GamerGate we have dozens of stories of people trying to explain Twitter harassment to a legal system that’s never heard of Twitter. People trying to explain death threats to cops whose only relationship to the internet is checking email, confusedly asking, “Why don’t you just not go online?” Like, yeah, release your text game about depression at GameStop for the PS3 and get it reviewed in the Boston Globe, problem solved.

You see this in the slowness of mainstream journalists to condemn the harassment - hell, even games journalists at first. Because what if it is a legitimate movement? What if the harassers are just a fringe element? What if there was misconduct? The people in a position to stop GamerGate don’t have to be convinced of their legitimacy, they just have to hesitate. They just have to be unsure. Remember how much happened in just the first two weeks, how it took only a month to become unkillable.

It’s the same hesitance that makes mainstream media, online platforms, and law enforcement underestimate The Alt-Right. They’re terrified of condemning a group as white nationalist terrorists because they’re confused, and what if they’re wrong? Or, in most cases, not even afraid they’re wrong, but afraid of the PR disaster if too much of the world thinks they’re wrong.

ACCOUNTABILITY AND CONTROL

A thing I’ve talked about in The Alt-Right Playbook is how these decentralized, ostensibly leaderless movements insulate themselves from responsibility. Harassment is never the movement’s fault because they never told anyone to harass and you can’t prove the harassers are legitimate members of the movement. The Alt-Right does this too - one of their catchphrases is “I disavow.” Since there are no formalized rules for membership, they can redraw boundaries on the fly; they can take credit for any successes and deny responsibility for any wrongdoing. Public membership is granted or revoked based on a person’s moment-to-moment utility.

It’s almost like… they’re cherry-picking.

The flipside of this is a lack of control. Since they never officially tell anyone to do anything but write emails, they have no means of stopping anyone from behaving counterproductively. The harassment of Jenn Frank was the first time GamerGate’s originators thought, “maybe we should ease off just to avoid bad publicity,” and they found they couldn’t. GamerGate had gotten too big, and too many people were clearly there for precisely this reason.

They also couldn’t control the infighting. When your goal is to harass women and you have all these contradictory justifications for why, you end up with a lot of competing beliefs. And, you know what? Angry white men who like harassing people don’t form healthy relationships! Several prominent members of GamerGate - including Internet Aristocrat - got driven out by factionalism; they were doxxed by their own people! Jordan Owen and Davis Aurini parted ways hating each other, with Aurini releasing chatlogs of him gaslighting Owen about accepting an endorsement from Roosh, and they released two competing edits of The Sarkeesian Effect.

I say this because it’s useful to know that these are alliances of convenience. If you know where the sore spots are, you can apply pressure to them.

LEADERS WITHOUT LEADERSHIP

One way movements like GamerGate deflect responsibility is by declaring, “We are a leaderless movement! We have no means to stop harassment.”

Which… any anarchist will tell you collective action is entirely possible without leaders. But they’ll also tell you, absent a system of distributing power equitably, you’re gonna have leaders, just not ones you elected.

A few months into GamerGate, Randi Lee Harper created the ggautoblocker. Here’s what it did: it took five prominent GamerGate figures - Adam Baldwin, Mike Cernovich, Christina Hoff Sommers, Milo Yiannopoulos, and Nick Monroe, formerly known as [sigh] PressFartToContinue - and generated a block list of everyone who followed at least two of them on Twitter. Now, this became something of an arms race; once GamerGate found out about it they made secondary accounts that followed different people, and more and more prominent figures appeared and had to get added to the list. But, when it first launched, the list generated from just these five people comprised an estimated 90-95% of GamerGate.

Hate to break it to you, guys, but if 90+ percent of your movement is following at least two of the same five people, those are your leaders. The attention economy has produced them. Power pools when left on its own.

This is another case where you have to ignore what people claim and look at what they do. The Alt-Right loves to say “we disavow Richard Spencer” and “Andrew Anglin doesn’t speak for us.”

But no matter what they say, pay attention to whom they’re taking cues from.

AD CAMPAIGN

George Lakoff has observed that one way the Left fails in opposition to the Right is that most liberal politicians and campaigners have degrees in things like law and political science, where conservative campaigners more often have degrees in advertising and communications. Liberals and leftists may have a better product to sell, but conservatives know how to sell products.

GamerGate less resembles a boots-on-the-ground political movement than an ad campaign. First they decide what their messaging strategy is going to be. Then the media arm starts publicizing it. They seek out celebrity endorsements. They get their own hashtag and mascot. They donate to charity and literally call it “public relations.” You can even see the move from The Quinnspiracy to GamerGate as a rebranding effort - when one name got too closely associated with harassment, they started insisting GamerGate was an entirely separate movement from The Quinnspiracy. I learned that trick from Stringer Bell’s economics class.

Now, we could stand to learn a thing or two from this. But I also wouldn’t want us to adopt this strategy whole hog; you should view moves like these as red flags. If you’re hesitating to condemn a movement because what if it’s legitimate, take a look at whether they’re selling ideology like it’s Pepsi.

PERCEPTION IS EVERYTHING

One reason to insist you’re a consumer revolt rather than a harassment campaign is most people who want to harass need someone to give them permission, and need someone to tell them it’s normal.

Bob Altemeyer has this survey he uses to study authoritarianism. He divides respondents into people with low, average, and high authoritarian sentiments, and then tells them what the survey has measured and asks, “what score do you think is best to have: low, average, or high?”

People with low authoritarian sentiments say it’s best to be low. People with average authoritarian sentiments also say it’s best to be low. But people with high authoritarian sentiments? They say it’s best to be average. Altemeyer finds, across all his research, that reactionaries want to aggress, but only if it is socially acceptable. They want to know they are the in-group and be told who the out-group is. They don’t particularly care who the out-group is, Altemeyer finds they’ll aggress against any group an authority figure points to, even, if they don’t notice it, a group that contains them. They just have to believe the in-group is the norm.

This is why they have to believe games journalism is corrupt because of a handful of feminist media critics with outsized influence. Legitimate failures of journalism cannot be systemic problems rooted in how digital media is funded and consumed; there cannot be a legitimate market for social justice-y media. It has to be manipulation by the few. Because, if these things are common, then, even if you don’t like them, they’re normal. They’re part of the in-group. Reactionary politics is rebellion against things they dislike getting normalized, because they know, if they are normalized, they will have to accept them. Because the thing they care about most is being normal.

This is why the echo chamber, this is why Fox News, this is why the Far Right insists they are the “silent majority.” This is why they artificially inflate their numbers. This is why they insist facts are “biased.” They have to maintain the image that what are, in material terms, fringe beliefs are, in fact, held by the majority. This is why getting mocked by Stephen Colbert was such a blow to GamerGate. It makes it harder to believe the world at large agrees with them.

This is why, if you’re trying to change the world for the better, it’s pointless to ask their permission. Because, if you change the world around them, they will adapt even faster than you will.

THE ARGUMENT ISN’T SUPPOSED TO END

Casey Explosion has this really great Twitter thread comparing the Alt-Right to Scary Terry from Rick and Morty. His catchphrase is “you can run but you can’t hide, bitch.” And Rick and Morty finally escape him by hiding. And Morty’s all, “but he said we can’t hide,” and Rick is like, “why are we taking his word on this? if we could hide, he certainly wouldn’t tell us.”

The reason to argue with a GamerGater is on the implied agreement that, if you can convince them they’re part of a hate mob, they will leave. But look at the incentives here: they want to be in GamerGate, and you want them not to be. But they’re already in GamerGate. They’re not waiting on the outcome of this argument to participate. They’ve already got what they want; they don’t need to convince you GamerGate isn’t a hate mob.

This is why all their logic and rationalizations are shit, because they don’t need to be good. They’re not trying to win an argument. They’re trying to keep the argument going.

This has been a precept of conservative political strategy for decades. “You haven’t convinced us climate change is real and man-made, you need to do more studies.” They’re not pausing the use of fossil fuels until the results come in. “You haven’t convinced us there are no WMDs in Iraq, you need to collect more evidence.” They’re not suspending the war until you get back to them. “You haven’t convinced us that Reaganomic tax policy causes recessions, let’s just do it for another forty years and see what happens.” And when the proof comes in, they send us out for more, and we keep going.

The biggest indicator you can’t win a debate with a reactionary is they keep telling you you can. The biggest indicator protest and deplatforming works is they keep telling you in plays into their hands. The biggest indicator that you shouldn’t compromise with Republicans is they keep saying doing otherwise is stooping to their level. They’re not going to walk into the room and say, “Hi, my one weakness is reasoned argument, let’s pick a time and place to hash this out.”

And we fall for it because we’re trying to be decent people. Because we want to believe the truth always wins. We want to bargain in good faith, and they are weaponizing our good faith against us. Always dangling the carrot that the reason they’re like this is no one’s given them the right argument not to be. It’s all just a misunderstanding, and, really, it’s on us for not trying hard enough.

But they have no motivation to agree with us. Most of the people asking for debates have staked their careers on disagreeing with us. Conceding any point to the Left could cost them their livelihood.

WHY GAMES?

Let’s close with the big question: why games? And, honestly, the short answer is:

why not games?

Games culture has always presented itself as a hobby for young, white, middle class boys. It’s always been bigger and more diverse than that, but that’s how it was marketed, and that’s who most felt they belonged. As gaming grows bigger, there is suddenly room for those marginal voices that have always been there to make themselves heard. And, as gaming becomes more mainstream, it’s having its first brushes with serious critical analysis.

This makes the people who have long felt gaming was theirs and theirs alone anxious and a little angry. They’ve invested a lot of their identity in it and they don’t want it to change.

And what the Far Right sees in a sizable collection of aggrieved young men is an untapped market. This is why sites like Stormfront and Breitbart flocked to them. These are not liberals they have to convert, these people are, up til now, not politically engaged. The Right can be their first entry to politics.

The world was changing. Nerd properties were exploding into popular culture in tandem with media representation diversifying. And we were living with the first Black President. Any time an out-group looks like it might join the in-group, there is a self-protective backlash from the existing in-group. This had been brewing for a while, and, honestly, if it hadn’t boiled over in games, it would have boiled over somewhere else.

And, in the years since GamerGate, it has. The Far Right has tapped the comics, Star Wars, and sci-fi fandoms; they tried to get in with the furry community but failed spectacularly. They’re all over YouTube and, frankly, the atheist community was already in their pocket. Basically, if you’re in community with a bunch of young white guys who think they own the place, you might wanna have some talks with them sooner than later.

Anyway, if you want to know more about any of this stuff, RationalWiki’s timeline on GamerGate is pretty thorough. You can also watch my or Dan Olson’s videos on the subject. I’ll be putting the audio of this talk on YouTube and will put as many resources as I can in the show notes. The channel, again, is Innuendo Studios.

Sorry this was such a bummer.

Thank you for your time.

[knights-past]

Stargirl Spring Break Special: Reaction

This will not be a full review of the Stargirl Spring Break Special, but more a quick capture of my immediate thoughts after reading it. Keep in mind, there will be spoilers.

I’ll be honest, it’s kinda weird that the Seven Soldiers of Victory are this idea that keep getting revisited in the context of this character. I get why, and it worked when they were revisited in the original Stars and S.T.R.I.P.E., but how much mileage can we really get out of a team who, while all being interesting characters on their own, don’t really have much of a *thing* when they gel together. Still, this brings back some characters who had been lost to limbo like Greg Saunders/Vigilante, Sir Justin/Shining Knight, and the second Crimson Avenger, the latter of whom made me more interested than anything else as she was a character that never really caught on when introduced and was sadly left to flounder.

One thing that I though was interesting is the way the presence of Green Arrow and Speedy is addressed. While the post-Crisis takes opted to simply retcon them away (replaced by the Spider and Stuff the Chinatown Kid respectively), in the spirit of the post-Death Metal, “everything counts/it all matters” stance, it’s established that the contemporary Oliver Queen and Roy Harper were sent back in time early on in their careers. In fact, it’s even posited that the events of that time travel are what eventually lead to their growing apart as seen in the events of Green Lantern/Green Arrow by O’Neil and Adams. Admittedly, I’m not entirely sure that works, timeline or meta wise, but hey. 

Beyond all that, it’s a fairly simple story featuring the Seven Soldiers reuniting in an effort to save Lee Travis the original Crimson Avenger from a time-travel plot involving Clock King and Per Degaton’s time machine. It’s worth noting that Emiko Queen/Red Arrow fills in for Roy Harper much like how Courtney fills in for Sylvester. And honestly, that’s one element that I really like and will probably appeal to some fans who are in this for the young heroes of DC - Courtney and Emiko’s meeting and forming of a relationship. The pair bond over their shared experiences as younger heroes, particularly after the Crimson Avenger bars them from participating in the mission for fear of their safety. I admit, I’ve not read much with Emiko Queen, so I can’t say how much it resonates with her character in other books, but it works here. It retreads some ground we’ve already seen with Courtney, but as this is supposed to somewhat serve as an introduction to the character for new readers, it makes sense to revisit.

In fact, that aspect of “the dangers of superheroics for young people” is kind of at the forefront of this issue, with the topic of the original Crimson Avenger’s sidekick/Eight Soldier Wing (who for some reason is drawn with a question mark on his chest) and his sacrifice being a key plot point and the revelation that Wing, Secret from Young Justice, and Dan the Dyna-Mite all being trapped by something called the “Childminder” along with other lost children. Obviously this is set up for a future plot point that will be continued in the teased Stargirl #1. Now when will we see that? Only *time* will tell. 

Speaking of teases, the book ends with Per Degaton appearing before Clock King and revealing that he has a plan that will hurt the JSA - in not one, not two, but THREE iterations!

And of course we see a fancy group shot of our new JSA, featuring several of the members that returned during Doomsday Clock (though not all of them; Ted Grant/Wildcat I, Sandy Hawkins/Sandman, and Jesse Chambers/Jesse Quick/Liberty Belle are all absent). And several members also have updated designs, most likely designed to reflect upcoming media appearances. I’m a bit mixed on them, but easily the worst are Mister Terrific and Hourman. 

Overall, while I enjoyed this issue as a fun superhero one-shot, it felt more like a “Seven Soldiers of Victory Spring Break Special” than a Stargirl Spring Break Special. While it makes sense to use Courtney as a viewpoint character to learn about these older characters, it places far more import on those characters than Courtney herself. And frankly, when it *is* placing the focus on Courtney, she comes off rather flat, more akin to how she was in the early bits of Stars and S.T.R.I.P.E. than as the more rounded, take-charge character she became throughout that series and her later appearances. It’s emblematic of Geoff Johns (*sigh*) and his tendency to focus on past stuff rather than building new things going forward, a tendency that only got worse with Rebirth. And with the tease for Stargirl #1 hinting that it’s gonna be all about Courtney looking for Wing and the others, it looks like that streak will continue. Even the teaser for the new JSA story focuses more on the JSA’s past than on building a new future. Don’t get me wrong, I love my continuity bs, but after a while it becomes old hat.

Oh, also of note: this issue sees a number of elements from the Stargirl TV show have made their way into the DC comics canon, the biggest of which being the semi-sentience of the Cosmic Staff. Now they also continue to reference Sylvester Pemberton as “the Star-Spangled Kid” and never address him as Starman or as the previous owner of the Staff like the show (and the New 52) presented. Given that they also make references to stuff from the original Stars and S.T.R.I.P.E. run, this implies Jack Knight was still the one to give her the Staff and the mantle. Will this be followed up on? Probably not, but it’s at least interesting to think about. 

[feelingofcontent]

DNP Rewatch: Draw My Life | AmazingPhil

Date video was published: 02/01/2013 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 167

The first Draw My Life video! Videos from both DNP were less frequent here at the start of 2013 than in 2012, likely because the radio show was taking up a lot of their time. (They weren’t just doing the live show, but even filming extra stuff for it as well. Please watch that video, I beg you.)

0:07 - “escaped the uterus” is a very Phil-way to describe being born

0:19 - Phil’s people-drawing skills are...something, lol

0:24 - this is so sweet and sad; he talks about this again later and you can tell he treasures those memories

0:34 - the animal documentaries explain a lot

0:43 - why does the weatherman have cat ears, lol

0:58 - I bet their parents blamed Martyn for that one

1:11 - the “KOOL KATZ”!

1:20 - this comes up in Are we Best Friends or FIENDS?! on DAPG later on!

1:50 - Buffy had to come up in this, of course!

2:04 - that is horrifying, but I guess one way to find out if you don’t want that career

2:15 - *snort* he doesn’t lie about the 1 week thing though

2:20 - ah, I knew when I wrote the post about The Breakup that he used Ian’s actual name later on! And the little shoutout to him 😊

2:35 - the fact that he got the camera from a cereal box and that led to YouTube is just crazy

2:49 - I love this. And that he currently follows the Instagram for “Long boi” duck at York. And of course we now know that part of the reason he liked uni was that he could be more open about his sexuality. (Also, why does the duck in the drawing have 4 legs?! 😂😂)

3:06 - also the stationary store where he had one of his first big crushes that ended in disappointment

3:23 - this story about his housemate dying is so sad and probably also really scary at the time. I can’t even imagine having to get through the rest of the year of uni after that. I’m glad Phil can look back on happy memories now.

3:48 - Faintheart mention again! He just talked about that in THE ATTIC too.

3:56 - is this the first time he’s talked about The Weakest Link? I think it might be.

4:05 - awww, PJ! They’ve been friends for so long now.

4:19 - really glossing over meeting Dan at this point and fudging the timeline a bit

4:23 - but there is an immediate switch to “we” for the entire rest of the video

4:33 - calling out the breakfast bar specifically 👀

4:41 - so many things they did together that first year!

5:00 - “the happiest I’ve ever been” 🥺

5:26 - reading all of the comments is so much 

5:31 - Phil’s birthday! He started celebrating with board games and chocolate. 😊

This video is a lot more personal than most of the content Phil was making at this point. Instead of just telling about things from his life, he talks some about how he was feeling in each moment as well.

[thelittlesttimelord]

The Littlest Timelord: The New Doctor Chapter 12

TITLE: The Littlest Timelord: The New Doctor Chapter 12 PAIRING: No Pairing RATING: T CHAPTER: 12/? SUMMARY: With the Doctor newly regenerated, he and Elise must now navigate their new relationship. The Doctor is an old man and Elise is a headstrong young woman. She is no longer the scared little girl the Doctor saved all those years ago. Will Clara be able to keep them from killing each other?

“Am I safe now?” Rupert asked from his bed.

Clara sat on the edge while the Doctor played with Rupert’s orange robot.

“Nobody's safe, especially not at night in the dark, Anything can get you. And all the way up here, you're up here all alone.”

Clara smacked the Doctor in the head, causing Elise to smile.

“What was that for?” he asked.

“Shut up, leave this to me,” Clara told him. Clara picked up a box of plastic soldiers. “These yours?” Clara asked Rupert.

“They're the home's.”

“They're yours now.”

“People don't need to be lied to,” the Doctor said.

Elise hit him on the arm and gestured for Clara to keep going.

“People don't need to be scared by a big gray-haired stick insect, but here you are. Stay still, shut up.” Clara started to set the toy soldiers around Rupert’s bed. “See what I'm doing? This is your army.”

The Doctor started to stand up. “Plastic army.”

“Sit!”

The Doctor sat back down.

Elise smiled. Clara commanded him like River once did. Elise could only imagine having that much sway over a person.

“And they're going to guard under your bed.”

Clara held up one in particular. “You see this one? This is the boss one, the colonel. He's going to keep a special eye out.”

“It's broken, that one. It doesn't have a gun.”

“That's why he's the boss. A soldier so brave he doesn't need a gun. He can keep the whole world safe.”

Elise noticed the look on the Doctor’s face and wrapped her hand around his arm, giving it a light squeeze.

“What shall we call him?” Clara asked.

“Dan.”

Clara’s head snapped up. “Sorry?”

“Dan, the soldier man. That's what I call him.”

“Good. Good name.”

“Yeah. Would you read me a story? It'll help me get to sleep.”

“Sure.”

The Doctor stood up and walked over to Rupert. “Once upon a time…” He touched Rupert’s forehead and he fell back on the bed, asleep. “The end. Dad skills.”

Elise frowned. “You never did that to me.”

The Doctor shrugged. “Never had to.”

They went back to the TARDIS.

“So is it possible we've just saved that kid from another kid in a bedspread?” Clara asked.

“Entirely possible, yes. The bigger question is, why did we end up with him, and not you?”

“I got distracted.”

“But why that particular boy? You don't have any. You don't have any kind of connection with him, do you?”

“No. No, no, no. Of course not. Why do you ask?”

The Doctor tinkered around with the console. “The TARDIS was slaved to your timeline. Theoretically, there should have been some connection.”

“Will umm, will he remember any of that?”

“Scrambled his memory. Gave him a big old dream about being Dan the soldier man.”

Clara sighed and put her head on the console, letting out a pitiful whine.

The Doctor carefully approached her. “Are you okay?”

Clara raised her head. “Doctor, I am sorry to ask, and, you know, I realize this is probably against the laws of time, umm. Er, could you do me a favor?”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

They stepped out of the TARDIS. They saw past-Clara walking away.

“Is that what I look like from the back?” Clara asked.

“It's fine,” the Doctor told her.

“I was thinking it was good.”

“Really?”

Clara walked back into the restaurant and they watched Clara interact with a man.

Elise sighed wistfully. Ever since Trenzalore…

“Oh, not you too!” the Doctor groaned, “I don’t need two starry eyed girls on my TARDIS.”

Elise would never understand why the Doctor made falling in love sound so horrible. The older Elise got, the more she wanted someone to spend her time with.

“I’ve got an idea. Come on,” the Doctor said.

“Wait, what?”

The Doctor wrapped a hand around her arm and pulled her into the TARDIS.

“Oi!” Elise tried pulling away from the Doctor, but his grip was too strong. She was a second away from biting him when he let go of her.

“Now, the TARDIS is still slaved to Clara’s timeline, so…” He threw a lever and the TARDIS took off.

Elise missed the days where the TARDIS would shake and sway as they traveled through the vortex.

The TARDIS landed and the Doctor left, coming back with a man in a spacesuit. They landed back at the restaurant and the Doctor sent the spaceman into the restaurant to find Clara, while he disappeared somewhere into the TARDIS. The spaceman returned a few minutes later, Clara following.

“I am trying to have a date. A real life, inter-human actual date! It's a normal nice, everyday, meeting-up sort of thing. And I would just like to know, is there any other way you can make this anymore surreal than it already is?”

The spaceman took off his helmet. He looked exactly like the guy Clara had been on a date with.

“Hello,” the spaceman said.

The Doctor re-entered the control room. “Ah, Clara! Well done, you found her. Now this is really a bit strange.”

“Danny?” Clara asked, with wide eyes.

“What's gone wrong with your face? It's all eyes! Why are you all eyes? Get them under control,” the Doctor told her.

“Er, who's Danny?” the spaceman asked.

“This is Colonel Orson Pink, from about a hundred years in your future,” the Doctor explained.

Clara let out a nervous laugh. “Orson Pink?”

“Yeah, I laughed too. Sorry. Do you have any connection with him?”

“Connection?”

“Yes, maybe you're like a distant relative or something?”

“How, how would I know?”

To someone like Elise it was glaringly obvious.

“Right. Okay.” The Doctor turned to Orson.” “Er, well, do you have any old family photographs of her? You know, probably quite old and really fat-looking?”

“I don't,” Orson said.

“How did you find him?” Clara asked.

“Well, you left a trace in the TARDIS telepathic circuits. I fired them up again and the TARDIS brought me straight to him. So he is something to do with your timeline,” the Doctor explained.

“Okay.”

“And you'll never guess where I found him.” The Doctor fired up the TARDIS and they landed in a capsule.

Clara walked over to one of the windows and looked out onto a desolate wasteland. “Where are we?”

“The end of the road. This is it, the end of everything. The last planet,” the Doctor said.

“The end of the universe?”

“The TARDIS isn't supposed to come this far, but some idiot turned the safeguards off. Listen.”

“To what?”

“Nothing. There's nothing to hear. There's nothing anywhere. Not a breath, not a slither, not a click or a tick. All the clocks have stopped. This is the silence at the end of time.”

Nothing could be heard except the sound of Orson transferring things from his locker to his backpack.

“Then how did he get here?” Clara asked, “If he's from a hundred years in my future.”

“Pioneer time traveler.” The Doctor sonicked one of the computers to show some news footage. “Rode the first of the great time shots. They were supposed to fire him into the middle of the next week.”

“What happened?”

“He went a bit far.”

“A bit?”

“A big bit. Look at him now. Robinson Crusoe at the end of time itself. The last man standing in the universe. I always thought that would be me.”

“It's not a competition.”

“I know it's not a competition. Course it isn't. Still time, though.”

Clara looked over at Orson, who was still stuffing things into his backpack. “He looks like he's packing.”

“He's been stranded for six months, just met a time traveler. Of course he's packing.”

He ran over to them. “You can do it, then? You can get me home?”

“I just showed you, didn't I? A test flight to a restaurant,” the Doctor told him.

“Yes, but to my family, to my own time?”

“Easy. I can do that, can't I, Clara?”

“He can, yes.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, fine. I'm fine.”

“Do I know you?”

“No. Nope.” Clara was still staring at Orson with wide eyes.

“Is she doing the all eyes thing? It's because her face is so wide. She needs three mirrors,” the Doctor said.

“Doctor!”

“We can't leave immediately, though. The TARDIS needs to recharge.”

Elise looked at the Doctor. The TARDIS doesn’t need to recharge.

Of course she doesn’t.

Elise rolled her eyes. You’re curious about something, aren’t you? Of course I am.

“Oi. Stop doing that Timelord mind thing,” Clara said.

“Overnight, that should do it, shouldn't it, Clara?”

“Overnight?” Orson asked.

“One more night. That's, that's not a problem, is it?”

Orson hesitated before answering and it made Elise think that maybe the Doctor was onto something. “No. No, no problem.”

“It's a shame, isn't it?” the Doctor asked.

“What's a shame?”

“There's only four people left in the universe, and you're lying to the other three. It was the first thing I noticed when I stepped in here. You must have seen it, too, Clara. You've got eyes out to here.”

“Seen what?” Clara asked.

“The universe is dead. Everything that ever was is dead and gone. There's nothing beyond this door but nothingness forever. So why is it locked?”

“Please, don't make me spend another night here.”

“Afraid of the dark? But the dark is empty now.”

“No. No, it isn't.”

[nonsexylucifer]

Why do people hate season 4 of Community?

I've seen the show a few times through, and I do understand that the writing and stories are the worst of the show, (due to Dan Harmon's firing). However some of the episodes and storyline for that matter, I genuinely enjoy. So for people in new who are like me, lets go through each episode to see what was good and bad. Side note, I originally tried to post this to reddit but it immediately got removed by a moderator. This is also my first time posting to Tumbler.. please be gentle(as a top that's the first time I've ever said that)TL;DR: I believe the only reason people don't like Season 4 is because the bad episodes are so bad, the make the good episodes not worth the while.

History 101: In History 101, I enjoyed seeing The Deans passion for Jeff and the lengths he'd go to keep him at Greendale.

Paranormal Parentage: Admitted unnecessary need of full episode in Pierce's house. We also never knew enough about Pierce's dad to care enough about his death, or it's impact on Pierce himself.

Conventions of Space and Time: Abed trust in someone he's never met feels unlike him. The Characters don't act like themselves in this episode.

Alternative History of the German Invasion: The repetitiveness of trying to get to the study room before the German students bores me. However one of the funniest jokes of the whole season, ( at least to me) at the end of the episode when Jeff and the study group think the the teacher set up the Germans as a ruse to get them to learn a lesson and the teacher just turns them down, it shows all of their vanity for themselves as a group, and individuals.

Cooperative Escapism in Familial Relations brings depth to Jeff's character through the story about his need for people to care about him and how he strives to be liked.

Advanced Documentary Filmmaking is really good in my opinion, at least until the last few minutes. Chang is one of my favorite characters so I suppose that could be bias but I do think that its a good episode.

Economics of Marine Biology: They spend the entire episode getting a rich due to come to their school, only to never bring him up again. Also the P.E. teacher storyline is stupid, If you've seen it, you know.

Herstory of Dance: Herstory of dance shows us actual emotion in Abed that we can sympathize with. Rachel to me was like a glasses for Abed, where we could partially understand Abed, but Rachel made him clearer. She was a great character and I was sad to see her go, ( I'll probably bring her up again ).

Intro To Felt Surrogacy: The puppets, greenscreen, and singing are objectively bad. I'm not a big fan of any of the non-film episodes, excluding the Foosball anime scene and Digital Estate Planning.

Intro to Knots: Funny episode that delves into the flaws of the study group and the faculty of Greendale. To me, a big example of the bad writing in Season 4.

Basic Human Anatomy: I like this episode, Annie and Sherley are a great unlikely pair which we've seen in the Season 1 Episode, The Science of Illusion. Troy and Abed's Freaky Friday storyline is weirdly comforting in a way. It's quite hard to explain but I feel like this was the most natural way to do the breakup and, as I will later weirdly rant about, I don't really care for their relationship. But this makes me actually sad for the two of them, or in this case three.

Historic Origins: I love this episode. The way the stories intertwined, with individual stories that actually made sense to the respective characters. Really good episode over all.

Advanced Introduction to Finality: I think the only reason I don't like this episode is because they stole it from Dan Harmon. The widely regarded best episode of the whole show, Remedial Chaos Theory, was perfectly crafted so that you learn little details in each different timeline, leading all the details to come together in the darkest timeline. It is unobjectively smart, and widely considered funny. Then for the season 4 finale, they throw the very anticipated follow-up episode out a GOD DMAN WINDOW. I apologize for yelling, but Dan Harmon could have done so much better if the writer didn't need to fill another episode slot. Also a sad excuse of a paintball episode.

If anyone is still reading, why, my opinion shouldn't matter this much, but if I still have your attention let me rant about some storylines.

Jeff and Pierces Father/Son Dynamic: Their characters work so weirdly well together. Jeff needs a father figure, any father figure and I think he finds that in Pierce weather he likes it or not. Pierce is objectively a not to great person, but that doesn't matter. Pierce shows Jeff that he needs to take other peoples feelings into consideration. I get a feeling the Pierce gained something from Jeff in the sense that Pierce has these decades of knowledge, although be it sometimes bad knowledge, that he needs to get out. He gives this knowledge to Jeff throughout the season before he dies. To me in a weird way, Pierce lives on through Jeff.

After credit darkest timeline scenes: See #13.

Troy and Brita's relationship: It just feels wrong to me. I have a friend who actually wishes that the pair stayed together. To me they just lacked chemistry. Do you remember in high school when you dated that one person that you throughout you had feelings for but when you look back at the relationship the only reason you stayed together was because you saw each other every day and you didn't hate them, which applied to almost every girl in high school because you kind of just wanted to feel some kind of emotion that was never shown to you by your parents... (r/oddlyspecific ) … that's what Troy and Britta feel like to me.

Jeff's hair: What in the actual fuck is Jeff's hair in Season 4.

Chang/Kevin's ties to Greendale City College: I feel like the writers added this storyline after filming so they had to do reshoots to put it in afterwards.

I expect this to die in new and no one to read this, but on the off chance someone does, comment on what you agree or disagree with, I would love to start a conversation about this great show. If anyone, be it people in new, or people who want to know my worthless opinion for some reason, thank you for listening, I needed to rant about something and this seemed to be the most harmless and prevalent thing, seeing as I am watching Season 4 as I'm typing this. And incase I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening and goodnight.

[twintailedcryptid]

How The Hideout Got It’s Name

Description: A short oneshot exploring the night that the mekatrio moved into the hideout from Kido’s perspective, thinking that this is somehow their father’s fault ec.

content warnings: Referenced physical abuse & suicide

Notes: Hi ahdiogu this is pretty old now but I’m moving from the hell site that is ao3 so i wanted to post what I had posted already here.

Unpacked boxes littered the barren room when the three siblings finally retired. They were exhausted from the day’s turmoil and from the task of lugging multiple boxes up several flights of stairs. In the moment they regretted bringing so many of their things but they all knew that they would be grateful for the added effort when they needed to take comfort in what little they still could claim for themselves. Even the little things, like old stuffed toys or a beloved book, would offer them the strength and solace they needed to continue on, and that is why when they were dragging a hand-truck of boxes up the stairs together that none of them had complaints as to what the others had deemed necessary to bring.

Finally done, Kano kicked off his shoes and took a few steps before nearly jumping. “The floor’s so cold!” he declared, a slight mix of dismay and amazement in his tone, as though he were impressed with the floor for being cold.

“It’s an abandoned building in November, what do you expect?” Kido asked tiredly before following suit and shuddering slightly as her socks made contact with the floor.

“Ah, that’s right…” He heaved a sigh. “I want to ragdoll but it’ll make me colder…”

“I’ll get the blankets then,” Seto said from behind them. “We left them in the rental.”

“I’ll go with you!” Kido said, her face falling with guilt at the idea of making her brother walk back outside alone in the dark.

“No, stay there okay? It’s fine!”

He left before they had the chance to object and Kido heaved a sigh, sitting down on the floor and not minding the cold. She had other reasons for wanting them to stick together, entirely unpleasant ones that amounted to their safety. Not only that but she didn’t want to be alone with Kano right now, already feeling tense in the awkward silence as Kano followed suit and sat down a little ways away from her.

The worry and guilt from the past two months weighed down on her as she glanced in his direction and then back down to the floor again. He’d been a lot quieter lately, almost the way he had been at the facility over half a decade ago. This time she knew that it was because there was a lot he wasn’t telling them, a lot that she supposed he was afraid to say.

She’d known right away something was wrong when he came home with bruises, on the night of Ayano’s death no less. He’d tried to hide them but like the faint handprints on either side of his neck, she had noticed them. When she asked about them he froze up and looked half ready to sob but simply said it didn’t matter anymore before isolating himself in his room. She’d been confused then, well no, she’d had her suspicions but she’d chosen to ignore them because she was a coward and that was her current guilt to harbor. Still, there was no denying what had happened when he began to flinch up around their father.

She should have noticed sooner, then maybe she could have stopped it all from happening. Her mother's death, Ayano's suicide, and her brother's abuse all could have been prevented if someone had noticed. And yet here she was, despite all the evidence hoping that maybe she had it all wrong. Maybe she was too quick to judge her own father for a bunch of different things and yet here they were, running away from him at Kano's suggestion. Surely, that could only lead to one thing.

She was just a coward in the end.

"Hey," Kano's voice was quiet as he stared over at her. "You okay?"

Before tears could sting her eyes she nodded and slid her hands into her pockets, staring down at her lap and pressing her lips together tightly. "Yeah…"

She breathed a heavy sigh and continued, not daring to look up again, her gaze feeling just as heavy as the rest of her. "I know you're not ready to talk about it...I'm not ready yet either…but…"

She didn't even know what she should say, she never was good with words, that was always his specialty. She searched and searched but nothing suitable- nothing that did this horrible series of events proper justice- was coming to mind so instead, her voice shook and she finally looked up at him.

Her brother- less than a year older but possibly far more mature than she could ever be- was staring at her in concern just like he had been for months. Like always, he thought of everyone before himself and had no time to care about it.

She took a trembling breath and came closer, taking both his hands into her own. "Can you tell me if you're going to be okay?"

His face softened but he could see the pain behind the expression as she began to cry a little. He sighed and carefully pulled her into a hug, letting her cry quietly into his shoulder. He rested a hand on her head to smooth out her hair and for a long while he said nothing.

Finally, he spoke up softly. "Have you been worried about me this whole time?"

"Of course you idiot! I've always been worried." Her voice didn't have any real bite to it as she clung to him. "Now say it! Say you'll be okay so we can make it happen!"

He chuckled lightly but tears were streaming down his cheeks when he nodded. "Twist my arm why don't you? But seriously, yeah, I'll be okay, okay?"  

The door opened just then, causing them both to flinch up but of course, it was only Seto. Kido carefully pulled away to wipe her eyes as Seto stared awkwardly in concern a moment before sighing and shutting the door behind him, making sure to lock it.

“Okay...We can make this work,” she said, more to reassure herself than anything before she stood to help Seto with the blankets.

Together, they piled the blankets and pillows onto the floor directly next to each other and then snuggled up to fight the cold of the new, rather unfriendly looking, place that they would now call their home. They wanted to go to sleep immediately, to wake up in a time and place where they could feel happy again, but in the dark with nothing but a dim flashlight propped against the wall to keep their bearings, they felt more vulnerable than ever and could not sleep.

“Are you sure this place isn’t haunted?” Kido asked in a whisper, not to any brother in particular.

“I didn’t have much time to case the place, sorry Tsubomi…” Kano passed up teasing her because he pretty clearly wasn’t in the mood either.

“Well, if we encounter any ghosts I’m sure they’ll be totally understanding,” she replied in gentle sarcasm.

“Maybe the ghosts will be nice,” Seto reasoned. “If they’re people who have already died then maybe… well we know people who have died and they were nice.”

“We’ve known evil people who have died too,” Kido pointed out, referring to her biological father but she left this up to interpretation. “I hope ghosts aren’t real though...I’d like to think that… well that they’re somewhere better right now...and not watching this dismal display.”

Seto swallowed and stared up at the ceiling sadly. “Yeah...I hope so too… I think this would make them cry…”

They were silent for a little while and then Seto spoke up in a whisper again. “Do you think they’ve found each other already?”

Kido tried to imagine it, Ayano and their mother reunited in some sort of afterlife or resting place, it was a comforting thought to some degree but on the other the thought of it made her want to scream. Why were they gone? Why was she left to huddle in the dark with her siblings like castaways when she’d been so sure that their troubles ended their last day in the facility? She loathed it entirely, she wanted to scream, cry, lash out, do whatever it took to bring them all back to a good timeline again. Instead, she forced the beginnings of a smile for her brother’s sake and nodded. “I’m sure of it…”

“If they can they have…” Kano said it with such certainty that it gave Kido a pause but she dismissed it as being Kano’s optimistic nature.

Some time passed and they managed to fall asleep for a few hours, then they heard a noise and all jolted awake, ready to fight some unknown attacker or beg a ghost for mercy, only to find after doing a quick search of the apartment that it was still empty. As they shivered and returned to their pile of blankets, Kido ran her hands over her torso and stretched, groaning. “I can’t stand this.”

She felt ready to cry but Kano smiled a little. “At least we won’t be woken up for breakfast at six in the morning.”

“And we aren’t in the monster room…” Seto added helpfully.

Kido just groaned again. “Don’t remind me…” She laughed dryly then. “You’re right, now we’re in the monster apartment.”

“I don’t like the sound of it…” Seto whined as he laid back down and the others joined him.

“What did you say our group name was again, Kano?”

“Ah fuck...what was it? Uhhhhhhh…Oh right. We’re the Mekakushi Dan.”

“Fine, Mekakushi apartment it is then,” she said dryly.

“Isn’t that kind of a mouthful though?” Seto asked meekly.

“Is it?”

After a few moments of silence, Kano announced quietly, “Hideout. We’ll call it the hideout.”

The others agreed with this and then started to fall asleep again but Kano’s words struck her. That really was what they were doing now, wasn’t it? Hiding from their own father, their mother and sister dead, the three of them orphans again. They even went back to calling each other by their old surnames again, just like they had at the facility. Just like that everything they had, all the happiness they had built was dashed away again.

Here they were back at square one but this time around that square seemed a lot less charming.

Still, as dismal as everything was now, she took a deep breath in and reminded herself; She was happy once, happy twice, and if they survived this they could learn to feel that joy again. She’d only have to wait and see.

[hackedmotionsensors]

Hey I feel like you’ve already answered this but what are some of your favorite iron man or Captain America comics and why? What story lines would you recommend? I’m curious about the more modern stuff. What’s some of your fav comic artists when it comes to marvel?

OKAY SO. 

holy shit this got long so UNDER THE READ MORE WE GO

This is always kind of a hard question to answer because I personally have not read everything in regards to either Iron man or Captain America. I’ve read the Tales of Suspense stories a lot because I keep trying to start over from the very beginning. And that’s not always helpful if you just wanna dip your toes or give Iron Man/Cap a go.

So what I CAN tell you is here’s what I did when I was first getting into comics around 2012.

I went to Borders/Barnes and Noble and a I read a bunch of the compilations they had in the store. Someone has already done the work FOR you so its really easy to just pick up a book and read from there. 

I started out with Invincible Iron Man  (I’m gonna link to Amazon but I suggest not buying from them because Bezos is a demon [comixology is owned by amazon as well but it is a convenient app]) 

Marvel has its own comics app but if you also read and pay for other comics its not ideal. There are places to “read comic books online” and for older stuff I definitely do this now but for newer comics I’ll try to pay for them especially if its indie. Support indie comics!!! 

Anyway. Invincible Iron Man. A polarizing story in terms of Iron Man lore. But its definitely an easy one to get into and read especially if you’re coming in from MCU and are just testing things. You don’t necessarily need to know all of his history but it covers the basics. 

Next I’d try Demon in a Bottle It’s the original alcoholism arc. A must read for general Tony’s lore. This isn’t the one where he ends up a hobo on the street where Cap helps him escape from a burning building. But this is where he goes off the rails the first time. Bethany Cabe is his current girlfriend and tries to help him. And he kind of recovers. I’m not sure this is exactly a FAVORITE but it has a lot of the important shit for Tony. His temper is something that doesn’t get talked a lot about I think but he DEFINITELY has one. The art is very..........lol its not BAD per say but its also not like wow what gorgeous art. 

Another important Tony lore is Armor Wars So you wanna read the first few times Tony and Steve fight about REAL SHIT. This is it. This is the classic story where he realizes his tech is being used by bad guys and HE’S THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN STOP THEM NO CAP NOT EVEN YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE A GOOD GUY AND I MIGHT HAVE TO GET DIRTY. It has the classic Steve sitting in a dark room waiting for Tony to come back with his date and then throwing his shield at Tony going “I don’t want your trash”

It also has a lot of good Tony being in a morally grey area. *chef’s kiss* 

And then basically read all the fun stuff with Kurt Busiek in Vol 3 (This isn’t an amazon link but the marvel database so you know roughly where to start) 

VOLUME THREE HAS SUCH HITS LIKE

The Sentient Armor: Tony accidentally kills Whiplash in a lightning storm. The Armor comes to life. The armor falls in love with Tony and WANTS TO BECOME ONE WITH TONY. Tony does not want this. Tony is beat up and kidnapped and taken by the armor to a deserted island. The Armor is like Tony I love you so much GET IN ME NOW. Tony is about to die from a heart attack. The armor RIPS ITS HEART OUT AND SHOVES IT INTO TONY. Bye Tony I love you now we’re one forever. RIP

Tiberius Stone’s 2 arcs (they’re not in consecutive order but they’re both hella gay): Tony’s old boarding school friend shows up again and is a TV mogul and is DEFINITELY NOT Slandering Tony in the press or blowing up his buildings or framing him for MURDER oh my god Tiberius is a pain in the ass and we definitely boned down as teenagers but he would never frame me for MURDER but his TV devices that seep into your brain like the boob tube thing from Batman Forever are pretty suspicious. Oh no Tiberius IS a bad guy and he got me naked (why?) and hooked the both of us up to the TV machine and now we’re trapped in his horny tv dream why am I dressed like Alice in Wonderland???  ALSO HE SLEPT WITH MY GIRLFRIEND!!!!??

(This is why I will FOREVER get upset that Killian in Iron Man 3 isn’t Tiberius Stone. He IS LITERALLY FOLLOWING THE TIBERIUS STONE PLAYBOOK INCLUDING THE PHYSICAL LOOK WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE FEIGE YOU OWE ME MONEY!!!!)

Also at the beginning of Vol 3. Tony gets the absolute holy hell bejesus shit beat out of him. And that lasts for a WHILE and seeps into the Avengers Vol 3 (which you should also read its fun and I like that George Perez actually tries to make people look ethnically diverse but also you can tell Clint from Cap)

There’s also a part in vol 3 where Monica from FRIENDS shows up at a party and that’s a wild thing that happened.

But basically I think you can start just about anywhere with Iron Man and have a good time if you’re a deep Tony fan. He has a lot of great stories and its why he’s my favorite. Even this last run with Slott I still KIND OF LIKE ANYWAY??? bc its Tony. Its not always written to what a lot of long standing Iron Man fans would say is canon but I mean.....he’s got 57 years worth of comics behind him so he’s bound to change here and there. He was once a super villain, died, brought over as a teenager from an alternate timeline, and then merged with another Tony I forget the details but its silly lol

Side universe reading Iron Man Noir, Ultimates (Hickman’s run is very fun but also Ultimates 1 and 2. DO NOT READ ULTIMATUM IT IS GROSS, I HAVE READ IT FOR YOU ALMOST EVERYONE DIES ITS GROSS.

Ultimates is literally half of the basis for the MCU. Don’t read Ultimates Iron Man tho. Not only is it written by a creep its also extremely stupid and doesn’t even really make sense in terms of what happens later in Ultimates. It basically gets RetConned immediately.

Also Ultimates universe has Gregory Stark. Tony’s fun evil twin brother who for some reason is blonde. I can’t really give you a specific story to read with Ultimates because its the most god awful confusing universe to try and find stories from so I literally don’t even remember. I’d check an Ultimates fan blog for that.

AS FOR CAPTAIN AMERICA.

I love Steve Rogers. I really do. I think he’s a fun character. B U T. His comics for me can be very boring. He has some great arcs as someone who is supposed to be a representation of what a GOOD AMERICA can aspire to or whatever. But America often times SUCKS A LOT (our current times being very obvious). Cap definitely fights for what he believes and so that’s why he often takes off the garb of Captain America and runs around in a slutty v neck and a cape as Nomad. Or when he comes back from the dead and his BFF is the new Cap (WITHA  KNIFE) and wears the sexy Secret Avengers uniform. Very sexy. We stan the Colonel Rogers uniform very much. But his early comics are a lot of “OH MY GOD I KILLED BUCKY ITS ALL MY FAULT BUCKY!!!!! RICK JONES PUT ON BUCKYS CLOTHES THIS ISNT CREEPY I PROMISE”

A GREAT run in Avengers is the Cap’s Kooky Quartet or as I call Cap Joins the Baby Sitters Club. This goes WAYYYYYY back to Avengers 17 

It runs for a very good while before Giant-man and Wasp come back because Giant Man can’t shrink back down lmfao idiot. But its a lot of fun and establishes Cap as being a really good leader even tho he’s thrown into the hot seat because he was out on a mission and everyone else was like “We’re taking a vacay bye Cap. Good luck with the kids” *John Mulaney doing Andy Cohen impression* HUH WHAT WHY

I have no idea what to Rec really lol I know @sineala is part of a SteveTony 616 discord and they do readings every month(?) of either very SteveTony based arcs or specifically Steve or Tony arcs. But I think they have a better grasp of Steve stories than I do.

I would say most recently the run with Mark Waid and Chris Samnee as the artist is a VERY good read. The story is pretty nice and dry lol but the art. Holy shit.

I know there are a bunch of artists that really REALLY get Cap but Chris Samnee is probably my number one favorite Cap artist. Even his sort of retro style works with Cap SO WELL. And I like Mark Waid’s writing. Or at least I don’t think I’ve ever been really mad at it like with Dan Slott or Gillen (We will never forgive for what he did to Tony’s backstory and taking Maria from him) lol

Uh...but as far as I could tell the entire run where Bernie is his girlfriend is VERY good. She first shows up in Captain America 247 . Cap is an illustrator on the side (or as his main job) and man what a dope. His art habits are worse than mine like get a desk Steve. But this arc through Bernie goes through a lot of Steve being kind of stuck in the past and not knowing how to embrace the modern or future and Bernie is there being the coolest fucking chick in the world who’s studying to be a lawyer, watches Wrestling, listens to Bruce Springsteen (I think lol I forget), dunks on Cap for being a weirdo old dude. Very put together woman of the 80s. She proposes to Cap and because I think the writers changed he’s like I HAVE TO LEAVE IMMEDIATELY BYE. 

This isn’t on any of the main timelines but its a good read Captain America Man Out Of Time. Basically Cap coming to grips with the future and realizing the past sucked ew. lol Also he listens to Radiohead which Tony gives him a personal concert for because of course he does.

And then of course there’s this fucking TOME of a story Captain America: The Winter Soldier .

Im gonna sound a little negative but I don’t mean it against anyone’s favorite but I have the most exhausting time trying to read this story. I’ve tried at least three times lol. I think maybe Brubaker’s weird obsession with the Cold War (Remember when he called people who were yelling at Slott for being a creep a ‘Bunch of Commies’) is just so fucking heavy handed that I can’t personally get through it. I would much rather watch the movie.

HOWEVER. There’s good old Bucky coming back from the dead. Natasha. Sam Wilson. Sharon Carter. All big players in this story. So uh lol good luck with this one. If you’re also a Bucky fan this is a must read but as I only peripherally like Bucky I don’t care to read this one. 

So I’d check out this arc.

Also a personal fave of mine is 

It starts here on Captain America 402 . Its the best story IN THE WORLD. ITS SO ICONIC. NOTHING CAN COMPETE. I LOVE CAPWOLF SO MUCH lol

[iris-sistibly]

I carefully zipped my suitcase after packing all of my clothes and other stuff, I double checked my list to make sure I didn’t forget anything, and when I was I was done, I threw myself on the bed and let my eyes scan through the entire room, “I sure am gonna miss this place,” I said to myself, as soon as I said that, anxiety slowly crept over my system. Tomorrow I will be leaving Pyongyang and head to Russia where I’ve decided to fulfill my dreams and finally start a new chapter. It’s not like my first time to go overseas, but at this moment it felt different. I sighed and glanced at my ring, my most treasured memory of him, how long has it been? Three years? I don’t really know, I’ve lost count...or perhaps I just didn’t want to count the days, or I just wanted time to stop just like how my world stopped spinning when I lost him. 

Moments later I heard a knock followed by the sound of the door knob being twisted, “Dan?” my mom entered my room. I got up and met her eyes, “Are you all set?” she asked. I nodded, she smiled and sat next to me, she placed her hand on mine, “You wouldn’t be here for awhile, so I want you to take care of yourself okay?”

“I will mom, you too,” I answered, “And please be extra careful when you go on dates, don’t drink too much.”

“Oh you don’t have to worry about me my dates are such gentlemen and not to mention very good-looking as well,” a muffled squeal escaped her mouth, she’s been acting like a teenager lately, she has been so adamant of remarrying eversince she consulted that weird fortune-teller she wouldn’t stop blabbing about. I shook my head, three years ago I was engaged to a man who never reciprocated my feelings yet I was crazy at being so determined of pushing through the marriage, I heard Ri Jeong-hyeok has been discharged at the military and went to Switzerland to pursue a career in music and the woman he truly loves as well, I hope they’re happy. While I on the other hand, after learning to accept and let go have decided to remain unmarried despite of my mother and uncle’s persuasion to find myself a new man, have I become “allergic” with the idea of marriage?

I rolled my eyes at my mother, “Whatever,” I said and stood up, I snatched my coat from the closet and wore it. My mom crossed her brows, “Where are you going?”

“I’m going for a walk, I just want some fresh air.”

The chilly breeze immediately brushed onto my skin the moment I stepped out of the house, it was quiet yet I appreciated the solitude, somehow it made me feel at ease, I walked around the neighborhood and as if on cue, memories of the past started playing in my mind. Our first meeting and the second, I thought he was cute but an idiot at the same time, despite of all my efforts to win the heart of my ex-fiance, for some reason I always end up being with him, but I actually didn’t complain, there’s something about this guy that made me trust him. Coincidence or not he was always there, he put up with my antics at trying to make the man I thought I loved fall for me, he was there when I had my heart shattered over and over, he was always there for me and I knew I’ll never be alone. It was never Jeong-hyeok, it has always been him...I just failed to realize and acknowledge it right away. 

I stopped by the nearest park, the sky was full of stars tonight, and it was pleasant to see. Suddenly I saw a shooting star, many people around the world believe that when you see one and make a wish, it will come true. I thought it was ridiculous, yet I found myself closing my eyes, hands clasped together, and wished for a miracle. Well, there’s no harm in trying right? Just this once, I thought, I want to feel his presence.

Moments after, I felt the wind blew gently but it felt different. It felt so...warm, the kind of warmth that was so familiar, I slowly opened my eyes and looked to my side, my eyes went wide, my heart skipped a beat, I don't know why or how, but beside me is the man I’ve been longing to see all these years. I froze in astonishment, is this real? No, this can’t be! I must be dreaming, or hallucinating, there’s no way this could be real...

But does it matter?

“Gu Seung-jun…” I muttered. He didn’t say a word but he smiled at me, his face was so serene, sure he has always been good-looking but I've never seen him so happy, so at peace. He caressed my cheek, my heart was overflowing with joy for the first time in three years.

Right then and there, I was reminded of a very special memory, the night when he gave me my ring. I can never forget the sound of his voice that’s now echoing in my mind, “When I am doing better and if you’re still single, then please give me a chance...I like you Dan, because I like you, I will keep in mind where I am going, I will live that way, I will do that from now on.” 

I’ve been asked so many times why at my age haven’t found a suitable husband, the answer is simple, because I’ve already found the man that I have been looking for, and I intend to keep him in my heart for the rest of my life. He is a bittersweet memory I would never want to forget, and if I would be given a chance, I would go back to the day I met him no matter how painful or tragic our story ended. Because he was the only man who made me feel good about myself, who made me feel loved, who valued me until his last breath.

I still want to give him…us a chance and I will hold on to that no matter what it takes. It may not have happened in this lifetime, but who knows? Maybe in the afterlife, or perhaps in a different timeline and place? One day, someday we’ll be together again. The idea gave me hope, and the fact that I'm seeing him right now is proof that the universe is full of endless possibilities, and I will hold on to that chance. For now, I am contented knowing that he has indeed been better, and for that I am grateful, I on the other hand promised to live my life as best as I could and be happy...always. I finally smiled back at him and said the words I’ve been yearning to tell him all these years, those words I should have told him long ago, “I love you…Gu Seung-jun…” then his image slowly rippled and faded, I was left alone once more, but this time I never felt empty again. 

-

Seo Dan’s Wish by: Iris

Written from Seo Dan’s (duh) point of view

Drama: Crash Landing on You

~Damn, Seo Dan and Seung-jun made me shed buckets of tears. Never thought I would love the 2nd couple but daaaaaamn! They had one of the most unforgettable scenes in the show, Seo Ji Hye and Kim Jung Hyun executed their scenes so well, it’s sad that these two ended their love story in a tragic way. Seo Dan is a badass, she’ll be fine but I still fancy the idea of her and Seung-jun getting the happy ending they both deserve. 

Also, I haven’t written a fanfiction in ages so please bear with me 😂😂

[tessatechaitea]

Justice League Spectacular #1 (1992)

Just off-panel: Bibbo's ice cream truck.

I probably shouldn't be reading this or Justice League Quarterly before I read the Giffen/DeMatteis Justice League but what can I do? That's the order they were placed in the short box! It would be a different story if free will were not an illusion but since it is, my hands are tied. It's either read this or, um, I don't know. Die from a temporal paradox? I won't risk it! I was looking through a bunch of my old writing and art last week and discovered a bunch of the kind of sentimental and sort of intellectual crap young people write. It's the kind of stuff you hide away and never show anybody ever and hope that when you die, it'll just get tossed in a dumpster with your old porn and Magic the Gathering cards. But it got me thinking about how brave I am! So brave! The kind of brave you wouldn't hesitate to call some jerk who signed up for the military because he couldn't live as a civilian. No, no. More braver than that! And being this super brave kind of person, I thought that maybe I should share some of this old poetry with everybody! But not yet! You have to work up to being truly brave! So instead, I'll share this piece of artwork I did that was supposed to be the first in a lengthy and disgusting series. It's of Lord Fondlerot, a character I created for the Dwarflover online comic I used to do. He was really into fucking things and I thought, "Hey! I should do a series of drawings where he fucks every creature in the monster manual!" But instead of doing an entire series, I drew one picture and grew either bored or disgusted with the concept. So here's that one picture:

Lord Fondlerot fucking an Axebeak.

Now you're probably wondering just how terrible my poetry must be if I'm opening with that! Well, you'll see soon enough! This issue begins with Sue Dibny still alive and visiting a Florida theme park with her husband, The Elasticated Man. Wow, remember when Sue Dibny was killed and all the heroes freaked out about their secret identities and considered doing intense brain damage to every single person who ever knew any of their identities until they found out that The Atom's ex-wife Jean Loring had gone cuckoo for Atom's cocoa puffs? She wanted them back so bad that she began threatening and murdering the loved ones of all the super heroes. It was the kind of story DC sometimes does where you read it and think, "Well, the twist at the end of that mystery was definitely worth the destruction of the most stable marriage in the DC Universe and also the death of Firestorm and Captain Boomerang! So good!" I mean it doesn't make you think that. It makes you think the exact opposite. Tom King would eventually do pretty much the same thing in Heroes in Crisis but instead of Jean Loring fucking up by accidentally killing Sue Dibny and murdering more people to cover her tracks, Wally West fucks up and kills Poison Ivy and some others and then tries to cover his tracks. But at least Tom King's had all of those entertaining scenes where the heroes are doing therapy and we get to see how much they're all suffering from PTSD. That's always a fun aspect of super heroes we never get to read enough about. Dammit! I keep doing it. I meant it was the opposite of fun! Although I still liked it because sometimes I just like seeing other people in pain. Not in a sick perverse way where I pop a boner or something! Just in that way where you sit around all day thinking, "My life is terrible and everything is wrong and I hate my parents for bringing me into this wretched existence and the only thing that might make me feel better is to learn that Superman sometimes feels the same way." Oh, remember when Tom King was writing Batman and he had that two issue Booster Gold arc where we got to see how fucking insane Booster Gold was from living through all of those horrible, wretched, dark alternate timelines? And the only way he can deal with the trauma and the PTSD is by making a joke out of everything? I'll have to think of that as the canon Booster Gold when I'm reading Giffen and DeMatteis's Justice League. Maybe it'll make all of Booster and Beetle's inappropriate joking more appropriate. Back to the story, Sue Dibny, alive and well, and her husband Ralph "The Elasticated Man" Dibny are busy showing a bunch of European diplomats around the non-Disney World theme park.

See? You can tell they're European because they're all smart and shit.

The first stop in the park is to Alice's Wonderland where the diplomats are attacked by the Royal Flush Gang. They are a gang whose theme is playing cards and not expensive toilets. Their powers are the ability to ride on gigantic cards and to make poker puns.

If looking good in tight fitting costumes is also a power, it's my new answer to the question of which super power would I choose..

Ten's outfit reminds me of the days when nipples were allowed to show through tops without being erased away through some kind of editing software. The 70s were a wild decade! Sure, there were also nips on television in the 80s but the 80s, generally speaking, sucked and were a huge contribution to the downfall of America.

The King of Spades mansplaining their entire concept to the Queen of Spades.

It's true that the royal flush beats any other poker hand but I doubt Superman is going to surrender after this concept is explained to him because, in the end, they're not fucking playing poker. It turns out Maxwell Lord paid the Royal Flush Gang to make a little trouble so the Justice League could beat them up and get some media attention. But the Justice League has apparently broken up and The Elasticated Man just isn't hero enough to save the European delegates all by himself. He might have been if the Royal Flush Gang had done what they were told and not really fight back. But why would they do that?! Wouldn't they still be in trouble with federal agents?! Booster Gold finds Blue Beetle busy pouting in the old Justice League cave headquarters. Booster has decided to try to cheer his old buddy up although why wouldn't Booster just travel to a timeline where Ted Kord is already cheered up? Is that how time travel works in the DCU? Or did Booster already try that, it went horribly sideways, and now he's a little more fucked up in the head when he returns to the "real" timeline?

For some reason, Ice and Fire have also come down to the cave. Probably to accidentally go on a double date with Booster and Beetle. Booster and Fire and Beetle and Ice hear a news report about the Royal Flush Gang and decide to go save Ralph. Superman also hears about the situation and heads to Florida where he's almost immediately defeated by The Royal Flush Gang. Not because they're dangerous and competent super villains but because some mysterious benefactor has give them weapons capable of knocking out Superman's powers. Maxwell Lord is not that benefactor so who could have done it? Certainly not Guy Gardner, right?! What would he want with getting the Justice League back together. Isn't he busy being Warrior or something by this point? Power Girl, Metamorpho, and Guy Gardner all join in on the fight. The guy behind it all is that Weapons Master dude who is desperate to get a new weapon for his arsenal: a Green Lantern ring. The attack on the Royal Flush Gang fails to get him the ring so he decides to attack directly. But not in this issue! He has to wait for a regular series issue. Ice uses Guy's ring to contact Hal Jordan because somebody finally decided this Justice League wasn't really a big league Justice League. Everybody reading it knew it for years. But I guess Dan Jurgens was assigned the task to get a new, more believably powerful League together. So Hal Jordan flies around to pick up some new members to save the day. He chooses The Flash and Aquaman which seems about right. But he also chooses Crimson Fox which seems like sliding backwards into goofy Justice League territory. Not that I totally approve of Aquaman but I have to admit he's a "serious" choice for the League.

Doctor Light also joins the party. Although why she'd keep the name of a pedo, I couldn't guess. Just become Lightwoman or something. But no! Once some jerk earns their doctorate, they just have to demand to be called Doctor.

I'm sorry. I was too distracted pointing out that Doctor Light joined the fight and how her namesake was a pervert to comment on Metamorpho acting like a huge fucking pig. Crimson Fox beats up some guys dressed as cards and admits that she's a boring idiot whose favorite part of the game is shuffling the cards. I understand the need to think up some kind of goofy one-liner when you go into battle but shouldn't you at least try to think up one that doesn't make yourself sound like a pathetic asshole? Weapons Master's plan failed but he figures he has enough information to get Green Lantern's ring next time. He'll then sell it to a Dominator for a few bucks and maybe some slaves. The big hitters talk it over and decide they should start a new Justice League without the approval of the United Nations. Yeah! Who needs some stupid Earthly authority when you've got an invulnerable Kryptonian, an all powerful space cop, and the king of the seven seas! All they need is a Greek Goddess and a mentally ill furry with a long history of violent behavior and they'll have the big team back together! Booyah! I mean, without that stupid Booyah shit because Cyborg is basically a toaster at this point. Maybe. I don't know! What am I, Johnni DC, Continuity Cop?! The heroes make one more decision: split the group into two Leagues. So once again, they're forming Justice League America and Justice League Europe. How come I don't remember this shit?! Did the comics get canceled in '92 and then immediately fired back up? I don't seem to remember two different incarnations of these teams. Maybe I should have stored my comic books in chronological order so it would all make sense. Justice League Spectacular #1 Rating: C. I just read the letters pages and it looks like this comic book takes place between JLA #60 and JLA #61! So editorial decided the teams needed to be shaken up and the best way to do it was to disband the League in the regular series, have a special one-shot comic that gets them back together but with a different roster, and then send them back to work in the next issue of the regular series. I guess I should just shove this comic book into the middle of the regular series so when I reread it all again in my 80s, it'll make more sense! Let's close with the worst drawing of Aquaman I've ever seen:

Actually, he looks a little bit like Grunion Guy.

[shookethbrooketh]

seven days (i’ll find you in any world)

day six

summary: dan is stuck in the wrong timeline. one day, he kisses phil goodnight. the next morning, he’s completely alone. he doesn’t even recognize where he wakes up, and little details in the world around him have changed. he has no clue what’s happening or where to go next in an effort to fix it; all he knows is that he has to find phil.

genre: sci-fi, a lil bit of angst, happy ending

warnings: just some swearing!

fic word count: 16.0k chapter word count: 2.4k

a/n: yes, i am back with the second to last chapter of this fic! i haven’t updated this fic in months, but i wanted to come back and finish it for you guys now that i’ve got some free time. i hope you all enjoy!! 

written for the @phandomreversebang ! inspired by the awesome moodboard/edits by @maybeformepersonally ! beta’d (beginning to end) by @i-might-just-leave-soon !

out of the corner of his eye, he caught phil being thrusted violently into a blue and purple void, but he didn’t have much time to focus on his counterpart, as he was being pulled backwards into his own void. his limbs were thrashing uncontrollably, and it took all he had not to open his mouth and let the bag escape him. as he fell farther away from phil’s flat and the universe he had come to know for a day, the edges of his vision began to go black, and all faded away into the darkness. 

read it on ao3

or keep reading below!

“The paper!” Dan whispered to himself with a sense of urgency; unlike days past, today Dan hadn’t managed a few seconds of blissful ignorance upon waking up. He stared at his open hands, and even his sleep-blurred vision could tell that there was no paper waiting for him. He jumped out of bed, barely taking notice of the fairly nice bed he’d woken up in, and began immediately tearing it apart in search of the paper. He must have dropped it in his sleep, he kept telling himself, although he knew it wasn’t true. A frenzy later, the room was in shambles, and the paper was nowhere to be found. 

“Fuck,” was all Dan could say as he slumped back onto the bed and put his head in his hands. At that point, he couldn’t help but take a few moments to simply cry. That moment was one of the ones where he’d missed Phil the most; he wanted nothing more than to call Phil and cry to him, explaining to him how overwhelming the past week had been for him, but even his support system had left him, and he had nothing left to do but sob out the occasional ranting phrase to himself.

About half an hour later, he’d tired himself out, and his greatest desire had become going back to sleep, but he knew that wasn’t what the day had planned for him. Overcoming his serotonin deficiency was almost as hard if not harder for him than overcoming the fact that he was literally ten years in the past, but he had to do it. He could feel how close he was to Phil, HIS Phil, and that alone was keeping him going. 

“I remember seeing a phone around here somewhere when I was destroying everything in a five foot radius of the bed,” Dan muttered to himself, all of a sudden realizing the possibility that there was someone else in the residence. He paused for a moment, poking his head out of the bedroom door. “Holy shit,” he said. The apartment he was in was even nicer than the one he and Phil had, and they had a pretty expensive flat. “Who the hell am I?” he asked no one in particular, and he was lucky to find that no one answered. “A rich loser, apparently,” he noted. 

He found the phone, which was, unsurprisingly, an iPhone 3GS. To Dan, it appeared archaic, but he remembered getting it shortly after his eighteenth birthday when it was brand new, and it was the absolute top of the line at the time. “This must be the timeline where I have ridiculously rich parents,” he quipped as he dressed himself. His clothes were nearly as fancy as the flat, but luckily what society found snobby in 2009 was nowhere near as atrocious to his 2019 brain. 

It also didn’t take Dan long to find an excess of cash lying around, and it took him even less time to figure out what he was going to do with it. He opened Google Maps and immediately found a Starbucks within a mile, and there was no doubting that he needed something to perk him up after such a devastating morning. 

Dan made his way down to the street and started following the map to the energy boost. The walk only took him about fifteen minutes, but he was already exhausted by the time he got there, and he needed that coffee almost as much as he needed to find Phil. As soon as he opened the door, though, he found he could kill two birds with one stone. 

“What can I get you?” a 2009 Phil asked the person in the front of the line. Dan couldn’t help but lock onto him; it felt a bit odd, as if his brain had shouted, “target acquired”, but he was just naturally and immediately attracted to Phil. 

The few moments standing in line waiting were agony for Dan, but he finally reached the front of the line and ordered a Pumpkin Spice Latte. “Y’know,” Phil said as he made the drink, “I’ve never tried one of these before. Is it good?” he asked, turning to face Dan and looking him up and down. “Or is it just one of those rich boy tastes?” 

Dan felt a shiver run down his spine; this Phil was aggressive. “It’s pretty good; it’ll be real big in a few years.” 

“Come again?” 

Dan’s eyes went wide as he realized what he’d said. “Nothing.” 

Phil raised an eyebrow before turning back to the drink machine. He finished the drink and pulled out a sharpie to write Dan’s name on the cup. As he did, he looked up at Dan, making eye contact with him, and seemed to make a deeply analyzed decision before adding something else on the cup. 

“Dan!” he shouted, although he really didn’t need to, and handed him the cup. Dan read it; there seemed to be a phone number and the time “4:00” printed sloppily below his name. ‘Call me after I get off,’ Phil mouthed to him from across the counter. Dan took a deep breath before finding a place to sit and sip his coffee. The day had begun. 

A few hours later, Dan was sitting back in his flat of the day, staring at Phil’s phone number. After ten years and multiple universes, Dan would have thought he’d be able to call Phil without becoming extremely anxious, but still he couldn’t seem to pick up the phone. “Bullshit,” he muttered as he frantically typed the number into the keypad, rushing to push the call button before he changed his mind. 

“Hello?” Phil responded through the phone. 

“Hey, uhm, it’s Dan. The bo-” 

“Boy from the coffee shop, yeah,” Phil interrupted and finished the phrase for him. “You should come over to mine. Like, now.” 

Dan was right--this Phil was definitely quite aggressive. 

“Oh, sure. What’s your address?” 

Dan scrambled to find somewhere to write down the address and listened intently as Phil recited the numbers for the third time. Thankfully, his idiocy didn’t seem to put Phil off at all. 

“Great, I’ll be there in a few minutes,” he said once he’d gotten the address written down correctly. They said their goodbyes, and Dan was on his way. 

Dan couldn’t help but get inside his own head as he walked down the sidewalk. “He was really intent on getting me to come over, wasn’t he?” he mumbled to himself. “If I hadn't known him for ten years, I might have been a bit creeped out.” He stared at his feet as he walked. “I suppose I really haven’t known him for ten years. Not this him, at least.” 

He walked in silence the rest of the way; anxiety was beginning to eat away at him. He was starting to get an instinctual feeling in his stomach that something was wrong, but he couldn’t turn back. He had to go meet Phil; it was his only way of getting home. 

Finally, he reached Phil’s flat, and he was sweating profusely by the time he knocked on the door. Phil opened it almost immediately, with a huge smile on his face. “Dan! Come in.” 

He followed Phil into the flat and was immediately taken aback. The entire space was filled with makeshift scientific machines that Dan couldn’t even begin to imagine the function of. It was like the garage in Rick and Morty, but these contraptions looked like they’d all been shakily built in the last few hours. 

“So, Dan,” he said, sitting on a couch in the back of the room that seemed to be the only functional space in the flat. “You’re a time traveler?” 

He liked to cut to the chase, apparently. 

“Uh, y-” 

“You’re here from 2019.” 

“Yeah, I am,” Dan said cautiously, fear coursing through him. 

Phil strode up to him, close enough that Dan could feel his breath on his face. “Me too. And I think you’re the reason why.” 

“I haven’t done anything to cause this!” Dan shouted, suddenly defensive. He was having by far the worst six days of his life, and he wasn’t exactly happy to have the blame put on him for it. 

“You’re the anomaly, Dan,” Phil said, putting an edge on his name that sent shivers down his spine. “Now tell me exactly what you’re doing here.” Phil poked him directly in the chest, and Dan jumped back. 

“This is fucking insane. I don’t want to be here! I just woke up in a different universe a few days back, and now I’m stuck here.” 

Phil’s face softened a bit. “Hmm.” He frantically searched for something to write on, and Dan couldn’t help but wonder if he was on some sort of stimulant. “Tell me everything.” 

Phil was serious when he asked Dan to tell him everything. They talked about their recent experiences for hours and hours, continuing even as darkness began to enclose Phil’s flat.

“I think it’s clear what’s going on here,” Phil said after a rare moment of silence. 

“How is anything about this clear?” Dan asked, exasperated after dealing with Phil’s cokehead rambling for hours. 

“The Phil you talked to a few days ago had it explained perfectly. Another Phil tested on you, and he screwed up your timeline. Then your Phil went after you. That’s why I’m here.” 

“How do you know that?”

“Just sounds like the kind of thing he’d do, from what I’ve heard.” Dan rolled his eyes. “Even if it isn’t him, some Phil went after his Dan. There’s certainly piles and piles of parallel universes where you’re together, so it makes sense. And this is my first day stuck here, so he must have left yesterday.” 

“So now all the Phils are screwed up too?” Dan asked, a pit growing in his stomach. He didn’t have a scientific understanding of the situation like Phil did, but he knew that both of them being lost in parallel universes was not the best situation for Dan finding his Phil. 

“Sort of. But that could be very dangerous. When two anomalies take place at once, they could collide.” 

Dan’s eyes popped out of his head. “What the hell does that mean?” 

“See, this is the one thing that the other Phil you talked to was wrong about. Not all Dans and all Phils are screwed up quite yet. Anomalies are a ripple effect,” Phil responded, starting to draw on a chalkboard he somehow had in the flat. “They start in one universe, and then spread to all of its parallel universes,” he said, providing a visual involving way too many circles for Dan to follow. “Then they spread to the next layer of universes, and so on and so forth. If two anomalies collide,” he started, writing up a formula that confused Dan even more, “the timeline splits beyond repair after 24 hours. That’s when every Dan and every Phil will be affected, and that’s when neither of us will ever be able to get our timelines back.” 

“Wait,” Dan tried to interject, but Phil vocalized his concern before he could even think it through fully.” 

“And judging by the fact that I’m pretty confident that a Phil tried to time travel to get back to a Dan affected by the anomaly, they’ve definitely already intersected.” 

“What are you saying?”

“If we can’t fix this by tomorrow, we never will.” 

Dan sat in silent awe for a moment. He looked up at Phil, and just for a moment he saw the 22-year-old boy he’d fallen in love with. He blinked, and that Phil was gone. All that was left was a form who met him just that morning. “One more day,” was all he said. One more day, and he’d never see his Phil again. 

“One more day,” Phil confirmed. 

Dan took a deep breath before standing up. “Let’s get to work.” 

Dan spent the next few hours acting as Phil’s secretary as he calculated every possible formula and attempted every possible test to repair a timeline. 

By the time the night was up, Dan had made multiple runs for coffee and office supplies, and the entire floor of Phil’s flat was littered with crumpled papers. Finally, Phil looked up at Dan with desperation in his eyes. “This is it,” he said, holding up a paper. “This is the only thing I think could work.” 

Dan stared expectantly back at him. “Then try it!” 

“It’s only five minutes until midnight. There’s no time.” 

Dan could feel his body beginning to shut down. “But you have to do something!” he shouted, shaking as his heart beat out of his chest. 

“There’s nothing I can do!” Phil shouted back. “You have to take this to your next timeline,” he said, holding out the paper he’d written his solution on.” 

“Me? Why me?” he asked. “You’re the one who understands it!” 

“I can’t,” he said. “You remember that Phil telling you that we can feel the rights and wrongs of the timeline?” 

Dan nodded, his breathing suddenly slowing.

“Trust me. You’re the one who needs this.”

Dan reached out and took the paper, a wave of calm coming over him. “What do I do with this? The last time I tried to take something from one day to another, I lost it.” 

“Put it in your mouth,” Phil said almost too quickly. 

“That’s disgusting,” Dan responded. 

“Just do it! It’s a basic of time travel,” Phil snapped.

“Can you at least put it in a bag so the ink doesn’t run?” Dan asked, visibly annoyed. Phil found a Ziploc and handed it over, allowing Dan to put the paper inside. Dan put the bag in his mouth, and only a few seconds later he felt the ground come out from under him. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught Phil being thrusted violently into a blue and purple void, but he didn’t have much time to focus on his counterpart, as he was being pulled backwards into his own void. His limbs were thrashing uncontrollably, and it took all he had not to open his mouth and let the bag escape him. As he fell farther away from Phil’s flat and the universe he had come to know for a day, the edges of his vision began to go black, and all faded away into the darkness. 

[class-wom]

When news first broke that Legion’s third season would be its last, it caught fans of the off-beat X-Men��inspired series created by Noah Hawley (Fargo) off guard. But it was pitched to star Dan Stevens as a three-season story.

“Noah’s intention was always to bring it in to land with three. And so, I always knew where the story was headed, I just didn’t know how,” Stevens told Rotten Tomatoes.

He also felt “no amount of time that you could do full justice to something like Legion.” And soon when the final season of the FX series debuts on Monday, fans will see for themselves if the series does indeed land with a modicum of justice.

Set roughly a year after the events of the second season finale, Legion picks up with a new character, played by Lauren Tsai, diving headfirst into Legion-style madness. As is mutant tradition, she adopts the name Switch and quickly becomes key to David Haller’s (Stevens) plans as she can travel in time — an ability realized in the trippiest, coolest way possible. When we met with Tsai, Stevens, and other members of the cast on the set of the series in April, the actor described Switch as someone “searching for her place in the world” and “still trying to figure out her abilities.” But the place she finds David inhabiting will leave viewers wondering about his own state of mind thanks to the dozens of seemingly drugged-out young people in his thrall.

Stevens, who described David as a “love junky,” said the apparent cult sates him with a manic devotion, while he offers them something unavailable in the rest of the world. He even added Lenny (Aubrey Plaza) is “quite happy with this setup,” serving as a Ma Anand Sheela–type character to his Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (fans of Wild Wild Country will get the comparison immediately).

Plaza added during a recent phone call: “It’s the closest we get to Lenny’s ideal, aspirational self. When the season starts, she’s kind of right where she wants to be. She’s not being tortured by the Shadow King. She has power and control and a clear idea of what she wants, finally. It was very satisfying.”

The situation in David’s commune might seem beneficial to all involved, but Stevens admitted David is not entirely happy with the way things worked out for him. “He wants to see if he can sort of unpick this unholy mess that he’s created,” the actor explained. It leads – in the most Legion way possible – to David’s fascination with Switch and her abilities. As Stevens put it, “Can he change some of these awful things that he’s done?”

One of the terrible things he did in the second season was change Syd’s (Rachel Keller) memories of events so they could be lovers again. She eventually discovered the violation, and, as Keller told us, it led to the character “kind of crawling back into herself.” But the year between seasons also saw Syd recommitting to her mission; even if it seems like an obsession to some of the other characters.

Then again, her dedication may eventually derail David’s time travel plans. Going back to Stevens’ question about changing the past, he added Syd’s viewpoint: “Yeah you can go back and you can change all these things, but does that really change who you are as a person?” It is the sort of philosophical debate which makes Legion a true X-Men work even as its arresting visuals and unusual pace set it apart.

Another thing setting it apart is the way it re-invents itself each season. The first season saw David trying to figure out if he was ill or if there really was a devil in his mind. In the second season, he sought revenge on that demon — a mutant telepath named Amahl Farouk (Navid Negahban) — and destroyed his friendships in the process. The third sees David as the antagonist even as he attempts the heroic thing … or, at least, something he considers heroic.

“[David] feels like his life was ruined in that moment when Farouk came into his head when he was a baby,” Hawley explained. “And what he wants to do is to go back to that moment and protect himself as a baby and keep that from happening.”

The plan might seem heroic to David, but to Syd, Farouk and the others at Division 3, it may finally be the way his prophesied part in the end of the world finally comes to pass. The story idea is a key element of David’s comic book history – his attempts to travel back in time to kill Magento led to Professor X’s death and the Age of Apocalypse storyline – but it also gave Hawley a way to pivot David toward the role of villain. Not that anything on Legion is that simple or binary.

“What’s interesting is to challenge the audience to say ‘Well are you with him now? Are you with him still?’ And if you’re not with him, we have to make sure that you’re with the other characters. That you want Syd to win,” Hawley said.

Subjective reality is still a key element of the series, and while audiences may still end up sympathetic to David’s pain, Hawley hoped viewers “realize over the course of the season how this need for love — that he feels is solely about him — begins to distance us from David a bit [and think,] ‘Oh, he’s a very ill man.’”

But even in that, his illness does not necessary equal villainy in the Golden Age comic book sense. David’s selfishness may, however, lead some to see him that way. “We expect our characters to learn and to be redeemed, but there are some people who aren’t really capable of that,” Hawley said.

Meanwhile, Amahl Farouk is, in fact, trying to redeem himself. Though, as Negahban put it, “it’s more about saving the world and also saving David. He really cares about David.” Despite being the unambiguous evil orbiting David’s life in the first season, Farouk is a changed person when we meet him at the beginning of Season 3. “He’s trying to be a good boy,” the actor said. “There has been a struggle for him to kind of determine whether [that is] right or wrong for him. And he’s trying to discover that through his journey.”

In some ways, the journey, as Negahban relayed it, parallels David’s major internal conflict. “He came from nothing. He became somebody, he had the power. He got lost in his power; he didn’t know what to do with it. And his rage and anger took over,” he explained. “It goes full circle and it gets to the point that he realizes that that rage and anger is what is destroying him. So if he can get rid of that, he can redeem himself. He can redo everything.”

To some extent, Hawley said the conflicts mirror the tension between childhood and adulthood, adding that at least some of David’s issues go back to the moment his birth parents gave him up for adoption. And David’s attempt to stop Farouk in the past means he may run into his father, X-Men founder Charles Xavier (Harry Lloyd).

Lloyd told us not to expect the “straight-laced Charles we know” from the X-Men films or animated television series.

“It’s trippy stuff,” said Stevens, adding there is “a lot of confusion and hurt, obviously” in regards to David’s feelings on Xavier.

“It is nice to finally to have this string that ties our crazy balloon to the main raft of the X-Men stories,” he continued. “And I think that will be satisfying to people who know and love X-Men and Legion.”

He also suspected Legion viewers not well-versed in X-Men lore will become curious about the Professor and his Merry Mutants: “[It] might cause them to go and watch some other X-Men-y type things.”

Of course, it remains to be seen if David will follow in his comic book counterpart’s footsteps and end the world as viewers have known it. That story was ultimately resolved when somewhat familiar mutants from the new timeline learned about David’s actions and prevented Xavier’s death. It is a pretty out-there idea and, yet, fits pretty well into the framework of Legion. No one on set was willing to divulge if the ending resembles David’s most infamous comic book turn, but Stevens said the end gives the whole story “a meaning” not readily apparent before.

“It’s really delicately done, I think. And very beautiful,” he said.

[notesofarichlycolorednight]

but like if Diana was suddenly Alive, how would she react to Luke and Tori's relationship, both pre-war and during it?

hey, thanks for being so patient with me on this!

i had to flesh Diana’s character out a little more so i could get inside her head and think of how she might respond to Tori’s relationship with Luke

so without further ado, hcs below!

so Diana is suddenly just…like Alive, prolly the year that Percy comes to camp, let’s say (which means that Luke has already stolen the lightning bolt and helm of darkness, but it’s like mid-january, just for timeline reference)

she wakes up in a hospital, the doctors say she came out of a coma but she’s pretty sure she died

she can’t remember where she was during the interim, and the doctors can’t recall how she ended up in the hospital or who was even paying for her to remain on life-support for so long

whenever she asks, they stutter a response before going completely silent and getting a glazed look in their eyes for a few moments only to come out of it, smile, and change the subject

she’s discharged from the hospital after a abt a week (idk if that’s even realistic lol) of monitoring and recovery

and as she’s getting dressed, a million thoughts race through her head abt if she still has a place to live, if she has a hospital bill that will kill her again, where her children are

and once that thought pops into her head, that’s all she can think abt

so even with all those other worries she finishes dressing and jumps off the bed, heading straight to the front counter to check out

but she pauses when she sees a familiar-looking man flirting with the nurse at the desk

she wants to confront him immediately, but doesn’t want to look crazed in front of the nurse so she shoves him out of the way, interrupting their flirting session

“i’m Diana Williams, checking out, is there anything i need to do? sign?”

the nurse is miffed and has enough dignity to look ashamed for ignoring Diana before grabbing a clipboard and pen for Diana to sign, explaining info abt bills and the like

Diana can barely hear, she scans the paper and signs before handing the clipboard and pen back to the nurse

she turns to face the man then

it’s Apollo if you haven’t figured it out yet

he’s abt her age, with brown skin and hazel eyes, short curly brown hair but she knows its him, she’d be able to tell from a mile away

he opens his mouth to say smth, but she grabs his arm and pulls him outside

“where are my children?”

flashing sideways to Tori, she’s at camp, totally oblivious to what’s just happened, as is Dan (still not claimed btw)

the next day they’re called to the big house before breakfast with no explanation

Diana is waiting with Chiron, in his wheelchair form, in the front room

Diana’s always been good at making friends, so she’s chatting with Chiron easily and honestly he’s more uncomfortable abt this whole situation than Diana

the doors swings open and Dan comes in first, quickly followed by Tori

they both pause when they see their mom and Diana stands, flattening the wrinkles in her dress and smiling nervously at her children

Dan rushes forward and pulls her into a hug, tears flooding his eyes

Tori is still frozen at the door, afraid this is some cruel dream or hallucination

when Dan is done hugging Diana, he pulls back, keeping one of her hands in his and turns to face Tori, who is still frozen at the door

Diana smiles softly and holds out her free hand, and like two magnets, Tori’s hand raises and she slowly approaches Diana

when their hands meet, Tori breaks down into tears and Diana rushes forward to throw her arms around her daughter as they both sink to the floor

it’s harder for Tori than it is for Dan, bc she was there when their mom died

Tori is afraid to let go of Diana’s hand or lose sight of her bc she’s so afraid Diana might just disappear, revealing that this was indeed some weird dream or hallucination

they settle into the front room of the big house and talk to Chiron abt this whole situation

he knows as much as Diana, which is not much and the gods sure as hell aren’t saying anything

when Chiron brings up the fact that they could just be summer campers, Tori hesitates and Diana notices

Dan looks away, annoyed but doesn’t say anything as Diana asks Tori what’s wrong

Tori blushes and looks away but doesn’t say anything

Chiron excuses himself and asks Dan to accompany him to whatever task he’s just made up. Dan goes reluctantly

Diana takes Tori’s hands into hers and says, “someone special?”

despite how much fear fills her that she’s going to blink and Diana’s going to disappear, it’s amazing how easy it is for Tori to fall back into this relationship with her mom

“his name is Luke.” Tori mumbles. “i don’t even know if he likes me back, but…well we’ve grown close you know over…well, over sh-shared pain”

Diana doesn’t meet him then bc everything is still settling, with her being Alive again and all

Diana reluctantly goes home, but promises to IM them that night and tomorrow (Apollo’s provided her with some drachmas)

Tori’s claimed that night bc Apollo got a stern talking to after Diana found out he hadn’t claimed her yet

but Tori sneaks over to the Hermes cabin that night to talk to Luke abt this whole ordeal

he’s not sure what to think, honestly, but some small part of him is afraid he’ll lose her now that her mom is back. and it’s stupid and irrational, but he can’t help but feel that way

but he lets Tori decide if she wants to go home until the summer (she ends up deciding to stay bc she knows smth is up with Luke)

Dan leaves for home

Diana IMs Tori any chance she can get thru those months leading up to summer

bc of his irrational fears of losing Tori, Luke confesses his love for Tori sooner, when summer begins (rather than right before he leaves for Kronos’ cruise ship)

so when Diana visits to drop Dan off for the summer session, Luke meets Diana

tbh, Diana’s shocked when she sees Tori holding hands with a white boy but she hides it behind a smile as Tori and Luke walk down half-blood hill, outside the barrier

Luke is nervous af but he also hides it behind a smile

Dan says goodbye to his mom before heading up the hill, not wanting to be there for the meeting

Diana and Luke shake hands

she looks at Tori and says, “oh, he’s quite handsome for a white boy”

Tori stares at her mom and Luke jumps like he’s been shocked before his entire neck and face go red

“oh, and he’s sensitive too, that’s good” (and she means it; i’m not trying to make it sound like some kind of jab to his masculinity or whatever)

when it’s revealed that Luke was the lightning thief and he goes off to kronos’ cruise ship, leaving Tori at camp, Tori goes home for that winter

of course she tells Diana everything and Diana just wants to tell her that he’s trouble and Tori shouldn’t be with him anymore

but Diana can also see how heart-broken she is and doesn’t want to make it worse

until Tori decides she’s going to go find him and convince him to come back to camp that next summer

“you can’t save those who don’t want to be saved”

“you don’t know that he doesn’t! i have to at least try! i owe him that much”

Diana can tell how much Tori loves Luke, and she’d hate to take such a thing away from her, but Diana’s scared that Luke is going to get Tori hurt, right after they got each other back

she wants to tell Tori that sometimes love is just like that

she loved Apollo, still does, but had to let him go bc he’s a god

they have a bit of a falling out right before Tori goes to find Luke bc of this

Diana tries IM-ing Tori while she’s on the cruise ship but they aren’t going thru and Diana starts to worry

she contacts camp but Tantalus and Mr. D are no help; the only thing she can do is talk to Dan

she feels utterly helpless so she starts praying to Apollo; she’s not sure what good it will do, but she does it anyway bc all she wants is for her children to be safe

Tori IMs Diana when she decides that she can’t stay on the ship, and that maybe Luke doesn’t want to be saved after all

she’s sobbing as she tells her mom this, and although Diana is relieved to hear that Tori’s coming back, she comforts her daughter and avoids any “i told you so’s”

but then Tori is stabbed by Kelli

Diana finds out bc Tori IMs her the night that Luke trades his life for Tori’s

when Diana learns this, the cold realization dawns on her that this isn’t some summer fling that she’s seen all her friends have before

it’s not even akin to what she and Apollo share

Tori and Luke’s love for each other goes far deeper and is the type of love that can’t be expressed with words

and when she realizes this, dread fills her entire body and she feels the most helpless since this whole ordeal began

Apollo’s told her abt loves like those in greek mythology; during their late-night talks when they were together

but she never imagined one of her own children would have found smth like that; it’s almost cruel bc greek myths rarely had happy endings and she’s afraid that smth may happen to her daughter

she can’t sleep for days afterward, IM-ing Tori as much as possible just to see her tho she doesn’t know what to say

Diana knows now that there’s no convincing her daughter to come back home or to give up on Luke

she continues to pray to Apollo

one day, tired of feeling helpless she IMs Luke and to her surprise he answers

she’s angry as soon as she sees him, but she doesn’t precisely know why bc he saved her daughter’s life–his love is strong for Tori and that should mean smth to Diana, but it only makes her angrier

tears fill her eyes as she spits out, “you swear on the styx you will protect my daughter, no matter what, do you understand? you are not to let any harm come to her”

and bc he loves Tori, Luke swears

she hates him after that point, but she loves her daughter more

and as long as Luke keeps his promise, then there isn’t much else Diana can do

Tori makes sure not to tell Diana any details abt what goes on as the war ramps up

some small part of Diana wonders how Tori could love someone such as Luke

but she also wonders if she could ever fall in love like that and with someone like Luke--can she really blame Tori?

Tori goes home after the summer that tbol takes place and Diana is there with open arms, esp bc Tori is devastated that she’s lost Luke

some part of Diana feels like its her fault bc she made Luke swear on the styx to protect Tori

but another part knows that Luke would have with or without her prompting; she’d done it bc it was the only thing she felt she could control at the time

Diana avoids talking abt Luke too much, just lets Tori vent as much as she needs

being home allows Tori a much-needed break, and Diana tries to encourage Tori to find the strength to keep fighting (heavily implying Tori needs to find the strength to move on from Luke)

Diana tries to stop Tori from going back to camp that next year bc a war is coming, but Tori feels she’s responsible for letting it get that far and Diana doesn’t argue despite being scared sick that Tori may die

she begins to pray to Apollo again bc both Tori and Dan feel obligated to help chb in some way during the war

when it’s all over and Luke dies, some part of Diana is relieved

but seeing how badly Tori takes it evokes that same anger toward Luke

Tori clearly deeply loved him but with him gone, he broke her heart and his promise

and Diana resents him for that

some small part of her wishes that Tori had never fallen in love with him in the first place

he was nothing but trouble

well, almost

bc it was clear that he made Tori happy

and Diana wishes nothing more than for her children to be happy

i hope that’s kind of what you were looking for

thanks for sending this in!! ^_^

FEED ME SEYMOUR

[astrodances]

This is That AU + bonus Resistance Cell AU (Danny Phantom)

(This turned out way longer than I intended, but god it’s a fun idea. If anyone creates anything out of this, please send it my way! And if you have any ideas to add, feel free!)

Danny Phantom “The Ultimate Enemy” AU where the future is the Ghost Zone and the Ghost Zone is the future (aka they’re switched, and the future is thought of as a location in time).

Skulktech’s medallion falls off? The gang’s sent 10 years forward in Amity Park, and Danny’s introduced to the mayhem he causes firsthand. Perhaps Clockwork has headquarters set up there now bc Dan drove him (and all the other ghosts) out of the Ghost Zone.

The Ghost Zone itself, much like the human realm, is also destroyed, but even more so. When Dan was done with Earth he invaded the GZ and didn’t look back. He declared himself the Ghost King, and when he learns the Ghostly Wail, he uses it to wreak even more havoc and scare off any lasting threats to his reign.

The ghosts that dare to stay in the GZ are either:

trying to appease Dan by doing his bidding so they’ll be spared (not that it helps much)

actually want to side and fight for him (like the Fright Knight)

got stuck in the aftermath of the invasion and are basically prisoners

or are part of the small resistance cell that tries to take Dan down (like Valerie in TUE)

So Danny and co. end up running from Clockwork into the GZ (which is also 10 years in the future) and Danny meets Dan and all that. Things go pretty much like the episode, except everything’s adapted to the switched environments:

The trio doesn’t need the medallions to stay in/leave the GZ, but perhaps they’re still wearing them from their fight with Clockwork anyway. Perhaps they work the same way for Sam and Tucker, but when they take them off before being crushed, they end up back with Clockwork in the future and not back in present-day Amity Park.

Since Dan knows keeping Danny’s medallion tethered to him would be pointless, he just takes it and uses it to go back to present-day Amity to ensure his future.

Dan throws a tied-up Danny through his self-created portal back to Earth. Whether Danny ends up back where he started with Clockwork or somewhere else entirely is up to you, but oooh, consider the ramifications of both:

He goes back to Clockwork:

he’s with Sam and Tucker again. He can explain everything he learned to them and they can come up with a plan, perhaps form a team with Clockwork and others.

BUT as a result, he doesn’t learn the Ghostly Wail (at the very least, not here, and possibly not at all bc up to this point, he probably hasn’t seen the Wail in action: he didn’t see Dan through one of Clockwork’s screens, and Dan didn’t use it on him during their first encounter. So it’s likely that the first he’ll see of it is when Dan uses it during their fight at the present-day Nasty Burger).

He ends up somewhere else entirely:

he could end up alone somewhere random, and possibly the only thing that saves him is the Boooo-merang that’s floated through time and the GZ (bc Jazz probably doesn’t know which realm he’s in in the future?) and found a natural portal to Earth?

Or maybe he ends up exactly where he needs to be, in Vlad’s lair, and although he doesn’t need the medallion removed, Vlad can at least free him from being tied up and can explain things, maybe help him get back to Clockwork.

Or maybe he ends up alone but then finds/is found by some ghosts (much like in canon). Maybe they still act like his enemies and he gets aggravated enough to learn the Ghostly Wail (à la canon). Maybe he doesn’t and they destroy him and (unknowingly) their chance to have things be different. Or maybe he can convince them that he’s not the same guy as Dan (yet), and they work together to organize an attack against Dan, maybe even with some humans (since this is Earth, and Dan destroyed both their homes, I’m thinking at least some groups of ghosts and humans would sympathize with each other and learn to live together). They also find Clockwork, Sam, and Tucker, since they need Clockwork to go back in time. (And maybe even future!Valerie, if she’s around?)

Or maybe Danny just ends up alone and stuck somewhere, and just...dies completely, leaving everyone and everything doomed.

However he gets back (if he does) and whoever with, the present-day story has a few key notes:

Unless Clockwork decided to send Sam and Tucker back, Jazz’s role is pretty much the same, only she might be a bit more worried about not being able to find Danny or his friends anywhere to confront him about cheating. When she sees Dan (posed as Danny) for the first time, she might be a relieved at first, maybe even hugs him, before going into the cheating thing. She’ll also try to send the Boooo-merang, but again, the odds for it finding Danny in the future are very slim since he’s in the human realm.

Also regarding Sam and Tucker: if they return, they end up tied to the sauce at the Nasty Burger like in canon. But if they’re still with Clockwork when Danny finds him?? Hoo boy, just you wait.

The final battle with Dan is the big present-day difference:

Danny likely doesn’t have the Ghostly Wail, so unless he learns it like right after Dan uses it against him, Dan will probably win and ensure his future (particularly if Danny fights him alone).

But if Danny has allies (regardless of how he got them/who they are)? You better believe the odds go up in his favor. That’s a whole lot of organized firepower, and it leaves Dan with only 2 truly useful powers: the Ghostly Wail and duplication. But Team Danny did a lot of training. Heck, the ghosts probably told Danny about the Ghostly Wail, so even if he doesn’t learn it/hasn’t actually seen it yet, they can all be prepared to take cover or whatever when Dan uses it.

What’s more, while most of the team is fighting Dan, a small group (either humans with ecto-weapons or w/ghosts’ help) can free Jack, Maddie, Jazz, and Lancer (and Sam and Tucker if they’re tied up, too; otherwise they’re probably leading this whole group). Now they got all the Fentons fighting Dan (and a much more motivated Danny).

Basically, Team Phantom wins and then some.

But consider this: in any of the scenarios where Sam and Tucker are fighting Dan alongside Danny from the get-go, something glitches in the plan and while they’re able to defeat Dan, they’re not able to save Danny’s family + Lancer. And for whatever reason (either Dan defeated him or he just decides to let this one play out or whatever), Clockwork doesn’t reset the timeline.

What does that leave Danny with? Two best friends (and possibly some allies, maybe even future!Valerie (which is a whole ‘nother rabbit hole to dive into)) that support him through the grief and loss. Perhaps they make him feel less alone, and he grows stronger bc of this and learns some lesson about the value of friendship or “some such nonsense.” 😉

But maybe Danny doesn’t see that lesson. Maybe Sam and Tucker are there to see him struggle with this new reality. Time after time he tells them that he’s afraid of turning into that monster, and no matter what they do, they watch as their best friend slowly evolves not into a Dan created through a fusion of two ghost halves, but a (still half-ghost?) Dan bred out of fear, anger, and self-hatred. Not the same Dan as the original; perhaps something much, much worse, and much more personal (YOU try shooting your evil best friend when you know there’s still good in him, you hope).

And yet another alternate ending to all this (bc apparently I can’t be stopped): perhaps Dan does survive the Nasty Burger fight and sees his goal through of stalling Danny just long enough to see the Nasty Burger explode and ensure his future (or so he thinks). He just isn’t able to defeat all of Danny’s allies. Heck, maybe they’re even able to free the Fentons + Lancer in time. All that’s for certain is that when the Nasty Burger explodes, Dan vanishes, leaving Team Phantom with their Ultimate Enemy™️ at large (and likely still with a time medallion).

Enter the Resistance Cell AU (and the opportunity for me to work in DS9 references): all the survivors of the Battle at the Nasty Burger band up behind Danny, and while everything’s fine in the world at first, they immediately start hunting down Dan to try to stop him before he can screw things up again.

This, of course, is way harder than it sounds (and depending on Clockwork’s status/willingness to help, could be even doubly so).

Depending on the original battle’s outcome, Danny might be motivated in part by a desire to avenge his family (which could lead to some conflict within the group). In any case, he’s definitely motivated to not turn into Dan, though sometimes he needs reassurance from Tucker and Sam late at night.

The way I picture it, Dan slowly sends the world into chaos yet again, with Team Phantom usually one step behind him. (Though maybe, they’re able to at least form some relief teams to help victims after they hear about an attack and try to gather clues to hunt him down? And maybe these victims join the team and help the fight, and maybe Dan doesn’t end up as powerful this time.)

But to go the angsty route, Dan basically gets a second chance to take over the world and GZ, and ten years later, the only thing stopping him from achieving complete domination is an undercover resistance group led by a young man who’s kept his vow to never become like him.

The only thing is, Dan has an ally of his own this time around (one more powerful than the Fright Knight): Vlad Plasmius.

[lemon-dropshot]

Day 17 - Royalty

Phanniemay 2018

Not A King

“Are you really going to let a 15 year old rule?”

“Clockwork,” an observant strayed from the assembly, floating briskly over to the time ghost with an amused demeanor. “Of all people, I would think you would be one to support the boy’s ruling. After all, you’ve taken quite a liking to him.”

The taller of the two shifted from his grandfatherly form to his adult. “I don’t mean to say that I wouldn’t support Daniel, but is it truly wise to let a high schooler rule the land? While this might result in a better timeline as opposed to a timeline with no ruler, the boy will struggle with balancing both his human and ghost identities.” 

Observants, no matter how they display themselves personality-wise, will always put the timeline first and foremost. That being said, they would not feel even the slightest bit remorseful for dumping an entire dimension on an adolescent who already has too much to worry about. Honestly, Clockwork wasn’t surprised when the observant he was talking to simply nodded and headed back to their station without another word of rebuttal. In fact, it hadn’t even been a likely possibility that one would answer his question at all.

He supposed young Daniel would have to just “deal with it,” as many high schoolers nowadays said. There were already numerous responsibilities on both his human and ghost halves to preserve, but hopefully the boy would find some joy in leading. After all, Clockwork himself lead the observants (or at least tried to) while watching the progress of every timeline and reality in existence.

And so, within the next week young Daniel was brought to the tower with no knowledge of what to expect, other than the letter the time ghost left for him on his dresser that asked him to attend a meeting.

Of course with Daniel Fenton would always come Samantha Manson and Tucker Foley. The three friends went together in most nearby timeline occurrences, so Clockwork made sure to save three seats in the front pew.

“Hey Clockwork! We’re here!” There really was no need for the halfa to shout; Clockwork was floating next to his monitors, which wasn’t far from the open doors.

“Ah, so you are.” His red eyes swept over the three of them. “I believe the observants have some interesting news for you, Daniel.”

The boy in question nervously stepped behind his friends, who both spared him anxious glances. Tucker cleared his throat, speaking instead. “This isn’t about, uh, Dan, is it?”

“I’m afraid this may be worse than Dark Dan.” The ghost sighed, looking towards the dented thermos across the tower floor. “Although he has been acting rather odd lately.” Danny gulped, his eyes following the other’s line of sight.

“So what… is this about?”

Clockwork pinched the bridge of his nose, his hood shifting forward as he floated towards a lower placed monitor. He directed it upwards to the humans’ eye level with his staff, showing them a screen of the tiring fight between Daniel and the former king. “Since you defeated Pariah Dark, the observants have deemed it entirely appropriate to crown Daniel king of the ghost zone.”

All three teens froze for a moment, their jaws slack. What could one even respond with to a statement such as that? Being king was an honor, usually, but not for a child, and most certainly not for one who is at a rivalry with most every ghost he has encountered.

“M-me? King?” Danny held his finger pointing at his core. “But what about all the ghosts that hate me? I can’t be king!”

Sam snapped out of her trance, shoving a hand down on Danny’s shoulder. “Yes he can!” She corrected, grinning down at her bewildered friend. Tucker looked back up at the screen in awe.

“How cool would it be to rule a kingdom? You could finally show up all your enemies, Danny!”

“I…” The shorter boy paused, looking down at the tower floor. At a loss of words, he loosely fiddled with the white split-ends of his hair, before giving up and turning human to tug at the bottom of his shirt. “I’m not fit to be a king.”

Clockwork faintly smiled at the bashful teenager. “I know.”

“If Danny doesn’t want to be king, then can he pass the job off to someone else?” The two human boys perked up at Sam’s suggestion, then anxiously turned to the time ghost for his response.

The ghost lightly chuckled. “That’s why I invited you three here today. Hopefully, you can convince the observants to choose another ruler of this reality. They refuse to listen to anyone but the possible timelines.” Clockwork smiled somewhat darkly. “But if Daniel denies the position, then they cannot force him to accept it.”

“Since Danny doesn’t wanna be king, can I be the king?” Sam laughed and shoved the joking techno-geek away. Danny snorted loudly at Tucker’s expense, holding out a hand to help him up from where he fell on the floor.

“Clockwork, do not tell me you are influencing the boy’s decision.” The three teenagers immediately startled at the new voice that floated into the room.

“And what does that matter?” The time ghost slowly turned towards the observant that rudely interrupted. “It is ultimately Daniel’s decision whether or not to allow persuasion.”

The observant heavily sighed, their large eyeball rolling around as if a human child. “It is time for the meeting.” They gestured to the young boy, ignoring his friends, to follow them. Irritated, Sam burned a hole through the back of their head with her glare.

Suddenly stopping, the observant turned to Danny and looked him up and down, unimpressed. “You should transform into your ghostly form.” After he did, no one said a word as they four dutifully followed the observant.

When they finally reached the large assembly room, it was filled to the brim with hundreds of observants, all staring down at them as they entered the doors. Taking a shaky breath, Danny nervously glanced up at Clockwork, who was failing at hiding a smirk. He didn’t feel as confident.

They were then guided to the front row of clothed pews. Since when did leather survive in the ghost zone?

“Daniel Fenton, a half-human half-ghost, and conqueror of past ruler Pariah Dark, is the rightful heir to the throne. Of the possible timelines discovered, a new successor of Phantom is the sixth most likely occurrence, and the one of the more desirable, as compared to a future timeline of human extinction, and a future timeline of chaos among ghost kind.”

Clockwork slightly slid down in his seat, hoping to help ease the nerves of the three teenagers. “They only know that because they keep sneaking into my tower at night and sifting through timelines.” The first chuckle came from Sam, who clamped a hand over her mouth as soon as she did so. Some observants sitting nearby bristled at her rude behavior.

Danny, while smiling at the ghost’s snark, was perplexed. Would someone bring up his human realm crimes? His thousand year sentence of Walker’s prison? He knew could prove he was innocent, but how many would believe him? Absorbed in his own thoughts, he failed to realize that the room had gone completely silent.

Sam nudged his arm with her elbow. He looked up to find that every eye was focused him, a boy who was fiddling his thumbs together and sweating immensely. He gulped, standing up on his shaking legs. They were waiting for an answer to a question he hadn’t heard. He supposed he only had one answer, anyway.

“I don’t- I can’t accept the position. Sorry.”

There were appalled murmurs throughout the congregation. Danny looked down at his friends, who were smiling proudly at him (although Tucker looked a bit upset at the fact that he wasn’t suggested as a replacement ruler). Clockwork, however, had such an unreadable expression that Danny started to question if he had truly made the right decision.

The single observant on the stage tapped their microphone twice to call order and attention. “Daniel Fenton has denied himself as the rightful ruler to the Ghost Zone. A case like this has only happened once before, in which a ghost has chosen another to lead.” The ghost paused, coughing away from the speaker into their fist. “That, of course, was before our knowledge of the timelines. Now, we must resort to a further possibility.” In the audience, three teenagers leaned forward in their pew.

An observant from across the wide room floated up from those around them. They cleared their throat quickly. “The ninth most possibility seems adequate.” Another observant three rows down from the first stood up in disagreement.

“The ninth most possibility will soon crumble into a disaster! I say we should use the thirteenth most.”

“The thirteenth most probable?! That would be the unluckiest of them all!”

Clockwork, having predicted the outcome of an argument, was already guiding himself and the three teenagers out of the room. Let the observants fight, while he figures out a solution himself, but the humans would not need to see it happen.

In the hallway, Sam crossed her arms. “So what will happen to the Ghost Zone? Who’s gonna lead, if not Danny?”

“Well, Samantha, we shall wait and see.” The time master chuckled. “Personally, I believe the second most possible occurrence would be an excellent choice, no matter how unwilling the observants see it fit.”

Tucker blinked. “What’s the second possibility?” A knowing glint appeared in Clockwork’s eye.

“Oh, you mustn’t worry over that. Just do not be alarmed if any ghosts start to appear… unusual.”

Danny peered up at the time ghost. “What do you mean by that?”

Clockwork simply smirked at the question.

[douxreviews]

True Detective - ‘The Hour and the Day’ Review

“I wanna know the whole story.”

The fourth True Detective episode usually features a big action scene that solidifies the halfway point in the story. The harrowing one-shot sequence in season one. The relentless shooting spree in season two. This is more of a prelude to this season's intense powder-keg separating the first half of the story from the second. It's another way that this new story toys with paying lip service to what came before while contenting itself with being its own thing.

What this does instead is take its sweet time in fleshing out what exactly is going on in each of the three timelines and the states of the characters as they exist within each of those eras. It sets the stage for what comes next in the season, while also being character and dialogue heavy. It also takes more time to explore the themes of the season, which I especially enjoyed.

Racial Divide

The issue of race is finally examined, which I feel the show has been dancing around until now.

I felt it was always in the background, noticeable in the lingering, guarded or just suspicious looks that are directed at Wayne Hays, the black detective in rural Arkansas. I've noticed it from the very first episode. Some people don't realize that prejudice is not always overt. In fact, I'd say a majority of it goes understated or unspoken, in that Travis Bickle sort of way.

The thing is most of the people who regard Hays in this way probably aren't even malicious about it, or would even consider themselves racist; I know people like this. You've got ones like state prosecutor turned Attorney General Daryl Kent who clearly looks down on Hays with this smug, dismissive superiority. Then you've got people like Mrs. Faber who will maintain politeness but always see him as an other, holding that look of thinly veiled fear and suspicion. Then there's guys like Tom Purcell, who'll drop racial slurs in moments of anger or frustration and then quickly feel ashamed; that reaction exists somewhere in their upbringing, but they know it's wrong.

No matter the shade in which it presents itself, there's no doubt it sticks in the craw of men as dignified as Hays.

Or men who aren't, as displayed when Hays and West pay a visit to Sam Whitehead, a possible lead on the one-eyed black man who bought the ominous dolls. Was his immediate rabble-rousing and accusations of racial profiling and witch-hunts just a natural reaction from an old black man who has experienced decades of injustice from white cops, or was it an easy way of avoiding direct answers to the questions he was asked? It's not entirely clear.

The hectic encounter with Whitehead and the other residents of that local ghetto did highlight the nuanced dynamic between Hays and West, which I've enjoyed throughout this season. While clearly a bit of a good ole' boy, West does not seem prejudiced. He even seems rather progressive for a man of his era, region and occupation, given his deep respect for his partner and stony admonition of Tom for his aforementioned drunken insult toward Hays. And Hays, while constantly on his toes about the racial divide between them, seems to recognize West's empathic quality, even enjoys it when West jokingly needles him about this sensitivity. It's another reason I dig this partnership, that understanding between two no-nonsense individuals.

Another character who appears not to be clouded by the resident race elephant is the priest at the Catholic church attended by the Purcells. Although West distrusts him on account of being a priest -- which would make even more sense today than in 1980 -- the man is very helpful in organizing his congregation to aid the detectives. He seems sincere in his assessment of Will and Julie and he hopes Hays, a former altar boy, would be open to confession. Nice guy, but there were certain things about his scenes that made me wonder if he might be involved in what happened to the kids.

Couples Counseling

More personal than societal, but equally important are the various relationships we are faced with in this story. It's heavily suggested that they have quite a bit of bearing on what's going on.

The big one is Wayne and Amelia's relationship. The contrast between their blossoming romance in 1980 and their rocky marriage in 1990 is very striking. We first see that the later stage is marred by feelings of resentment from Wayne and accusations of inadequacy from Amelia, despite the love they still share. After ten years, they've become worn down by the flaws and neurotic tendencies they seemed so excited about discovering at the start of their romance.

The first dinner date between Hays and Amelia was certainly the best scene in the episode. It was very cute, even sexy in a surprisingly subtle way. And their dialogue back and forth was just wonderful. Despite being so different in terms of background, occupation, politics and temperament, there was an instant chemistry that both recognized. Almost like these two people who each claim to have never wanted marriage or kids saw in each other the possibility of a future together in this first foray into intimacy.

Initially, though, there's Tom and Lucy Purcell. A couple whose furiously tumultuous marriage bred an unhappy family life, which may have played a factor in their children's secretive meetings with mysterious strangers and their eventual abduction.

Amelia gains an insight into this as she tries to comfort the distraught Lucy, and ends up getting the feeling that Lucy might be hiding something and ends up getting cursed out by the latter thanks addressing it. Not a very good first attempt at junior detective work, but she may have just unearthed a clue without realizing it. Lucy claimed that "Children should laugh", the same phrase included in the cryptic letter sent by Julie's abductor. Either Lucy was just wistfully acknowledging the logic of that message or it could be that she had something to do with what befell her children. It's still ambiguous.

As for Tom, we get to see the beginning of his and West's odd friendship as West gives the heartbroken Tom a place to stay away from his sad home. It's another indication that West is a naturally empathetic person, despite occasionally coming off as a hardass. Though it might be that his empathy has dampened somewhat in the years since.

It's a shame that the 1980 dynamic between Hays and West doesn't return when Hays is brought on board the task force of the second Purcell case ten years later. A shame, but realistic. No way the dynamic is the same after Hays got the shaft and West became the successful, award-winning career lawman who shook hands with young, pre-controversy Bill Clinton. And the fact that Hays, lead detective on the original case, is now expected to follow West's lead doesn't help. No-nonsense or not, old friends or not, pride asserts itself. To put it bluntly, dicks will inevitably be measured and pissing contested.

Haunted Houses

Now let's get more cerebral. The first season's tagline was "Touch darkness, and darkness touches you back", vey Nietzsche-like. That seems to be a constant theme throughout this series. The ways in which human horror and trauma can have dramatic effects on a person's sense of self and their reality. How they might serve as some explanation of what we see as the spiritual, supernatural and even paranormal.

It's introduced well-enough. Tom and Lucy Purcell feel trapped in their house, the place where the kids, the only thing that united them, were raised. Tom can't stay there, broken by their absence. And Lucy seems to stay in it as self-imposed prison for her failings as a mother. A disturbing situation where the place that is meant to be home feels more like hell.

The Hays household experiences a similar phenomena later, which Old Hays admits. He came to believe his unending obsession with the case infected Amelia and their children, sullying their chances at a stable, happy family. That he ended up cursing them with his own restless demons.

This takes on what could be a more literal meaning as Old Hays finds himself reminiscing on the past at the same time he struggles to beat back the ghosts in his mind. It's an incredibly haunting scene, watching him struggle to grasp the memories of his life as men he killed in Vietnam (and one caucasian man in a suit) close in and hover over him like phantoms, whispering, accusing. And the show has played so fast and loose with the line between psychologically unhinged experiences and what might be darker forces that exist on the fringes of existence. Rustin Cohle had his drug-induced visions which at times appeared to grant him insights into hidden otherworldly realms. Ray Velcoro's near death experience offered a bizarre yet prophetic glimpse into a possible afterlife. Now Wayne Hays' years of multi-faceted PTSD compounded by dementia conjure menacing ghosts from the past.

"Purple" Hays, indeed.

Escalating Confusion

But themes aside, the more concrete plot points are there as well.

In 2015, a dogged Old Hays enlists his son -- revealed to be an Arkansas State Police detective like his father once was -- in finding West to help him remember the details of the two Purcell cases. To my surprise, he tells Elisa Montgomery in their private meeting that the 1990 case haunts him most of all. Elisa informs him that she and her team of investigators discovered that the skeletal remains of Dan O'Brian, Lucy Purcell's cousin and suspect in both cases, were recently found in a drained quarry after he went missing around the time of the second case.

Which is interesting, because Dan O'Brian was already missing prior to 1990.

But Hays makes a possibly huge development in the second case when he spots a mysterious young woman who could very well be a grown up Julie Purcell on the security footage of the store where her prints were found.

Meanwhile, in 1980, Hays and West end up traumatizing Freddy Burns when his prints are discovered on Will's abandoned bike; I'd totally forgotten him drunkenly riding it at Devil's Den in the first episode.

The detectives and feds are drawn away from this obvious red herring when they catch wind of the redneck lynch mob advancing on Brett Woodard's home, who has prepared for this event with a military arsenal that's sure to deliver on the action spectacle we've all been waiting for.

Bits and Pieces:

* “The Hour and the Day” was co-written by David Milch, creator of Deadwood. This explains why the characters, dialogue and themes felt even richer than usual in this episode. Milch is almost as acerbic and literary as Nic Pizzolato, if not more.

* There's a framed picture of a brunette woman on West's desk in 1990. I'm betting that's Lori, the girl he was putting the moves on at the church.

* Hays sarcastically raising his hand during a briefing was another fun little callback to the first season.

* Not sure if it was explicitly stated before, but Kent, the state prosecutor in 1980, appears to have blatantly used the Purcell case to snag himself the Attorney General office. What a guy.

* Black Sabbath has been around since the late ‘60s. Seems kind of strange that a bunch of men in their 30s act as if it’s some strange new thing in the early '80s. Perhaps its mainstream recognition in my generation is simply coloring my perspective.

* During his ghostly encounter, Old Hays makes note of a dark sedan that is staking out his house.

Quotes:

Amelia (1990): Let go of me, Wayne. Hays (1990): Stop talking shit about me! Amelia (1990): Or what? Hays (1990): … Or I’m gonna start crying. Wasn’t expecting that.

Sam Whitehead: And you. How’re you gonna wear that badge? Hays: It’s got a little clip on it. Ha!

Hays: Can we say this was anonymous vandals? West: We’re not going with irate negroes?

Hays (1990): We ain’t doing any of that shit they just said, right? West (1990): Wasn’t planning on it.

Priest: Would you like to confess now? Hays: I reckon I’ll let it pile up a little more.

Hays: Thing of it is, Father, we’re about ninety percent sure that whoever took Julie or Will are one of yours. Priest: I find it difficult to believe that anyone here could something like that. Hays: They don’t exactly wear a signboard says “psycho killer.”

Four out of five Claymore mines.

Logan Cox