#dad look it’s the good kush

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Mozart: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body.

Dazai: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot.

Mozart: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!

Arthur: Hmm... I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where you're getting your facts from...

[vibranium-sheilds]

Masterpost

Everything on the account

By clicking on the tags it should bring you to all the posts with that tag on my account

Part 1  (Avengers, Black Widow, Guardians of the Galaxy) Part 1

Part 2  (Shang Chi, WandaVision, Loki, Hawkeye, Moon Knight, Ms. Marvel, TLaT, Deadpool)

Spiderman and Venom (Holland, Maguire, Garfield, Venom, No Way Home)

Avengers cast

[hoppinkiss]

> ao3 tag "so much flipping fluff"

> word count 622

[strawberry-mousse]

MASTER POST

Fandoms in this account are:

Supernatural

Vikings & The Walking Dead

B99, Youtube & Uncharted

Good Girls

Slashers

Stranger things

18+ Works

[myster10n]

kenny's relationship with his dad is. complicated. fucked up. idk. but when it's good it's literally the 'LOOK DAD IT'S THE GOOD KUSH' vine.

[eveningalchemist]

Black Sails ended in 2017. Vine died in 2017.

Coincidence?? I think NOT!!!

[Video Description: a compilation of clips from Black Sails, with the audio replaced by Vines. transitions are a ship, the Walrus, exploding. a full description of each Vine is written beneath the cut. end ID]

I think we're gonna be friends kazoo kid vine over Silver and Flint in the we might be friends by then scene.

Screaming kid good morning vine over Joshua trying to jump scare Gates.

Don't fuck with me vine over Jack Rackham fighting for his first prize with another pirate captain.

The fuck this shit I'm out song over Silver watching Flint beat Singleton to death. Silver jumps overboard after.

The when will you learn vine over Max shouting at Eleanor during their break-up scene.

The yeet vine over Flint tossing Richard Guthrie's wig off the boat.

The free your mind vine over Vane's speech before he fights the logging camp leader. Fast-forward though the fight to Vane getting his face kicked in.

Sail! vine over a beautiful opening shot of the Walrus. A crew member shouts. Cut to the Walrus being blasted apart with cannon-fire.

Today I will be playing Mozart vine over Miranda about to play on her clavichord before being interrupted by Flint collapsing at her door.

Kitty! I want to sing you a song vine over various scenes of Randall and Betsy, the ship cat.

Do you ever want to talk about your emotions vine over Gates chastising Flint outside in Nassau, cut with Billy interrupting.

Gimme your fucking money vine over Eleanor arguing with a pirate crew, followed by Vane throwing Ned Lowe across his cabin, cutting to his warning sign that reads, I angered Charles Vane

Saw you hanging out with Katelyn yesterday vine over Billy confronting Dufresne about his betrayal, with pirates reacting in the background.

I am the sand guardian vine over Flint and Silver on the beach after the Walrus is wrecked, cutting to Dufresne walking away from them.

It is Wednesday my dudes vine over the island's Puritan priest practicing his sermon in a field looking distressed, overlaid with the scene of Miranda seducing him.

Barbecue sauce on my tittles vine over the scene of Gates and Flint drinking during the storm, with Gates giving a solemn speech. Cutting to Flint laughing drunkenly.

Welcome to Chili's vine over Anne going to Max's room, interrupted by Jack appearing while they are in bed.

Harry what's for dindin vine over a crew member walking up to Silver while he's giving his goings-on report. He punches Silver in the gut and Flint makes an 'oh' face.

Bop-It! vine over quick cut scenes of Jack, Anne, and Vane, including various fuck-you jack moments.

Welcome to my meet or greet vine over Colonel Rhett of Charlestown welcoming Flint into the city, unfriendly.

Dad look, it's the good kush! vine over Vane rolling a cigar, cutting to Blackbeard standing in his tent looking tired.

It's an avocado vine over Woodes Rogers receiving Eleanor's embroidery attempt.

Do you have any ice? vine over Thomas Hamilton explaining his plan to pardon the pirates to Flint, who looks baffled.

Somebody left an ice cube on the ground vine over Silver walking into Nassau's tavern to call-out the pirates for taking pardons. He hits Dufresne with a mug.

Get on top of the fridge vine over Flint yelling at Billy during the storm. Cut to Billy clinging onto a yard as the ship nearly capsizes.

Look at this graph vine over Silver trying to use navigation instruments and explaining them to Madi. Madi looks increasingly concerned.

Road work ahead? vine over Jack in Roger's carriage as they are approached by pirates on horseback. The carriage crashes.

You should get the orange soda vine over Eleanor and Max talking in her office after Eleanor's return from London. Eleanor is the orange soda woman and Rogers is the waiter.

Two bros chillin' in the hot tub vine over quick cuts of scenes of Silver and Flint, including sitting on the beach after the doldrums, staring at each other across a gap, and Madi in between them giving Silver a pointed look.

Release all of those sounds that are trapped in your mind vine over Vane talking to Eleanor while he's in prison. Cut to Eleanor screaming in the corner.

The fuck is in the air vine over Jack arriving in Boston and complaining about the snow.

I love you, bitch, vine over Vane getting punched by Eleanor, then getting a noose slipping around his neck as she watches.

It's finals week vine over Silver scenes across all seasons, from pleading his innocence in season 1, to getting his leg removed, to trying to save Muldoon from drowning, and then pulling a gun on Flint in the final episode.

[tf2incorrectquotes]

Spy!Dad AU:

8 years old!Scout: Dad, look, it's the good Kush!

Spy: *flatly* This is the dollar store, how good can it be?

[inkwell-illustrations]

Maxie: Dad look, it's the good Kush! Husk: This is the dollar store, how good can it be?

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

Jane: Dad look, it’s the good kush!

Dad Crocker: THIS IS THE DOLLAR STORE HOW GOOD CAN IT BE?

[realtalkswithfinn]

The Olympians as Vine References

This is from forever ago, but I found it in my drafts and it still makes me giggle. Enjoy.

Zeus: “I said whoever threw that paper, your mom is a hoe.”

Poseidon: “I see you don’t have a lifeguard here at your beach.” “I’m not at the beach this is a bathtub-“

Hades: “YOULL BE A DED SONOFABITCH ILL TELL YOU DAT-“

Hera: “for everytime you don’t yell at your kids, put a quarter in your sock and soon you’ll have a weapon to beat-“

Demeter: “Dad look its the good kush.” “It’s the dollar store how good can it be?”

Hephaestus: “this is why mom doesn’t FUCKING LOVE YOU-“

Ares: “I’ll rip your face off, bitch!” “What did he do?” “He fuckin pushed me -“

Athena: “that is not correct, because according to the encyclopedia of phlphlphl-“

Apollo: “wOw”

Artemis: “go back to sleep, and starve.”

Hermès: “oh my god they were roommates.”

Dionysius: “two shots of vodka.”

there WILL be a part two.

[moony2moon]

Arc of a Scythe Incorrect Quotes pt 2 LETZ GOOOOOO

Greyson: What is love?

Sister Astrid: An emotional minefield.

Thunderhead: A neurochemical reaction.

Morrison: Baby don't hurt me.

Rowan: Is Goddard always like this when he loses

Volta: Oh yes. You should've been there for the great Jenga tantrum of the Year of the Gecko.

Goddard: YOU BUMPED THAT TABLE AND YOU KNOW IT!!!

Faraday: Rowan...

Rowan: I can tell by the tone of your voice that you are disappointed. Alas, I must further disappoint you by affirming how little I give a f*ck.

Goddard: *Standing in front of a baby changing station* Baby changing station, *puts hand over the letter C on the label* baby hanging station.

The rest of the New Order: *Starts cheering and clapping*

Goddard: ARE YOU READY TO F*CKING DIE!?!

Rowan: No! I'm a bad b*tch, you can't kill me!!!

Goddard: BIT-

Curate Mendoza: Alright flock, we're gonna play a little game called the name game, you can go first.

Greyson: *Lowers raised hand* My name is Shacka-Umph-Ka, and my dad knows god.

Curie: We did it! You're gonna be a father!

Faraday: I'm reading Harry Potter the Prisoner of Azkaban, what do you want???

Citra: *Holds up package* Faraday, look, it's the good kush!

Faraday: This is the dollar store, how good can it be?

Goddard: It's summer, I got my hat on backwards, and it's time to f*cking party- *Hits head on doorframe*

Xenocrates: Oh that was delicious, I am stuffed to the BRIM.

Constantine: Did anyone here say "room for dessert?"

Xenocrates: You bet your f*cking *ss-

Citra: I'm in Marie's car! Vroom! Vroom!

Curie: Get outta me car!

Citra: Aaaaawwww....

Like for part 3? Plz?

Do you want a cookie???

[cursed-40k-thoughts]

The tyranid hotness list absolutely depends on your type.

Gaunt: average in every way

Genestealer: Finger game and aftercare are absolutely top notch, but a bit too interested in sharing you with their friends

Gargoyle: the twink, you will probably break them

Warrior: you’d like six legs to go with a six pack

Venomthrope: For the after session kush

Toxicrene: For the *good* after session kush

Carnifex: Your friends say that your thing for dad bods has gone a bit too far but they don’t know what they’re missing

Ravener: You like constriction

Tervigon: You *really* like constriction

Lictor: Best sex you’ve ever had, immediately ghosts you

Deathleaper: somehow even better than lictor, but ghosts you even quicker, and then you spend the rest of your life worried you’ll bump into them again

Hive guard: Either knows the shocker or how to impale you, thinks that’s all there is to sex, terrible at everything else

Tyrant guard: Pummels you, but has incredibly tender aftercare

Hive tyrant: You want to beg mommy to step on you.

Spore mine: It’s over a bit too quickly

Pyrovore: don’t look now but the shy kid turned out smoking hot

Biovore: Size isn’t everything. But sometimes, it helps…

Exocrine: Sometimes it DEFINITELY helps.

Haruspex: What that tongue do? Everything, it turns out.

Zoanthrope: Complete incel, do not engage

Harpy: Double the gun, double the fun, the flying is an added bonus

Crone: It gets very messy.

Maleceptor: Complete brainfuck

Harridan: MILF

Hierodule: DILF

Hierophant: You are so desperate to get stepped on that it makes you look stupid

We have an initial list of sorts! Thank you, anonymous monster fucker #17!

[its-been-rose]

Forrest and Peggy’s relationship can be summed up in that one vine where the girl goes to her dad with a packet of asparagus and goes “dad look, it’s the good kush!” And he looks at her deadpan and goes “this is the dollar store. How good can it be?”

…..which I put in my killer frequency vine compilation here

[harrowitzer]

Mobius looks away from the report on his screen, up to the clock on the wall by the emergency exit. It takes a moment before the hands swim into focus. Four fifteen. The long, dark tea-time of the soul. Too early to slip out unnoticed, too late to start anything new. He rubs his eyes, which burn from the light of the screen and the flickering fluorescent overhead. He takes a deep breath and puffs out his cheeks as he blows it out, pursing his lips to make a sound like a miniature whoopie cushion.

"Who let the baby elephant in?"

His head snaps toward the owner of the voice. It's Ravonna, standing on the navy-grey speckled carpet outside his cubicle in her stockinged feet, one hand in her cardigan pocket and one holding a steaming mug of tea

Mobius turns back to his desk and collapses his chin into his palm. "Just trying to get these reports done. Seems like I'm behind a desk more often than not recently."

"That's what it's like at the top, Mobius. If you really want that promotion to Research, you gotta put in the paperwork time, just like the rest of us."

"The ole' ladder of success is greased by bureaucratic ink, huh?"

"Sure is. Keep it up, day's almost done." She raises her mug to toast him, then wanders off.

He calls after her, "You know, when I signed up for this, I didn't think the most dangerous part of the job was getting papercuts!"

She gives a laugh from several cubicles away but doesn't turn back.

Mobius picks up a kush ball off a stack of books and yo-yos it absentmindedly by one elastic cord. He glances around his cluttered desk at an array of more fidget toys, pens and paperclips, office supplies and folders and binders. His kids, holding a soccer ball and a trumpet respectively, peer out with fake smiles from a "World's Okayest Dad" frame. He smiles. It was a father's day gift, his ex probably bought it out of spite. He doesn't begrudge her, though. He loves it. He glances at the clock again. Four seventeen.

It's not like going home early would be any better than being here. It's not his night with the kids. He'll just heat up a lonesome microwave dinner and watch something mind-rotting. Maybe catch up on his reading.

He rolls his shoulders and cracks his neck, then straightens himself at the keyboard. Might as well finish the report. Maybe knock off another after this one, too. Burn some midnight oil. It'll look good if he's still at his desk when Ravonna leaves, anyway.

. . .

Mobius opens another set of double doors and enters the space. It's another large empty room, hastily abandoned or never occupied. Lights half off, and a glowing exit sign paints the far corner green.

He hurriedly sets out across the room, but stops suddenly in the middle.

The carpet is a navy blue-and-grey static pattern that looks strangely familiar. He looks up. The walls are a tone of warm gray he knows well. Mobis takes a step forward. Then another. In a few more steps, he's standing under a flickering fluorescent light. He stops and turns.

There are the indentations on the carpet where the walls of the cubicle should be. There are the five points of the wheels of his chair. He looks toward the exit sign. There, on the wall, is a circle of brighter white - as if something was hanging there, blocking the light that yellowed the wallpaper around it. A clock.

This is the the SCP office where Mobius works.

Only that's impossible. It couldn't be this cleared out. He was just here earlier this afternoon. Wasn't he?

What day is it?

How long have they been in this place?

. . .

Or: AU in which Mobius is an SCP containment officer, Loki is an SCP, and they get lost in the backrooms of the SCP building (it's bigger on the inside). The Polybius game, Sylvie and Hunter B-15 are intragal to the plot.

[fottitimioamore]

Gaz: Look, dad! It's the good Kush!

Price: It's the dollar store, how good can it be?

[feel-the-fire]

Katrina Von Kapital: Dad, look! It’s the good kush!

Baron Von Kapital: This is the dollar store. How good can it be?