#cw child manipulation

[purgemarchlockdown]

Read this tl of the news and literally everything about the MV screams “Kotoko what the fuck did you do” to me.

Why is the same girl in two separate warehouses?

Why does Kotoko not pay any attention at all her to her both when she’s reading the article and when the girl is Clearly waiting for her?

(She looks around in this shot, she's Actively looking to see if Kotoko is coming along this path)

Why does the girl look Angry at her in the first shot?

It makes Sense for Kotoko turn into the werewolf (Jacques) if she set that girl up. It makes Sense for Kotoko to feel so conflicted about it because Kotoko is a person who really does want to do "good" it makes...way too much sense with how the girl is Dressed as well

All of this is already a lot but...Kotoko does actively manipulate a child in Milgram canon...she does it to Es.

Yonah

K: You think long-term restrainment is not violence too? E: It's not. K: So you tolerate all of the psychological abuse going on in this prison, but draw the line at the physical one? What double standards you have! E: You're speaking nonsense! I'm the one who sets the rules for this prison. It's all of my choice.

If she really cared about this she would of Said it earlier in the conversation when they were first talking about the punishments, and Kotoko also never brings this up again once Es relents to her.

The context of this scene is Es actively criticizing her actions, and Kotoko is Deflecting that by criticizing Es instead.

Are there things to criticize? Yes, Definitely. But, again, Kotoko is Using this, not to get Es to STOP doing psychological abuse, but to let HER continue her physical abuse.

She also Repeatedly wears Es down in this VD, calling them weak, questioning their abilities as a warden, even calling them useless.

This is what you say when your trying to Wear Down Someone, you make them unsure of themselves, you make them trust their own abilities less and it makes them more willing to trust You more.

Questions about Es success as a warden aside, that isn't really the point of this, and it all culminates in the hug.

E: Kotoko... K: Come here. E: No... I d-don- K: It's gonna be alright. E: L-let me go, Kotoko... K: I know it well. It's so hard to hold the responsibility of a guard all alone. I've also felt this way. You are such a kind person. You can't stand the prison changing with the power of your choices. So you need someone to be with. Leave all of the dirty work to me. E: I'm... a kind person?.. K: Does your head hurt anymore? Don't worry. Leave it to me, and together we'll be able to create the right MILGRAM. E: I see... that MILGRAM...

Kotoko is calling Es a kind person, giving them validation, making them feel loved and cared for...right after repeatedly calling them weak and useless, and then asks to "Leave it to her."

Come on, rely on me, go on

This is actively exploiting Es vulnerability and emotional instability (instability she partially caused) to get Es to Agree with her. This is unfortunately consistent behavior, it makes me like her more as a Character, but also dear god Kotoko what the fuck did you do.

[ryderdire]

Example

—-

I hate the whole “zal supposed to be smart but he dumb hehe” “he’s so oblivious” meme

He is TRAUMATIZED. Let him BE!!!! Like yeah it is shitty of him to defend Vinlo to other victims but this man RAISED HIM. Not only that but he raised him with so much emotional manipulation and even some indtimadation like we saw in that flashback at the end of act 1.

Like come on guys he’s scared out of his mind for the latter half of act 2 while he’s posing as an amesiaic for the sake of his friends of couse he isn’t fully thinking with a clear mind. And honestly running the wrong way was clearly a descion he made to keep them away from his friends so they could escape he wasn’t running he was protecting them!!!!! And like emotional intelligence is wildly different from other types of intelligence especially given how neurodivergent coded zal is.

Stupid creative writing assignment

Write a fandom discourse post about your character like your a fan of the thing they exist in

[bambiraptorx]

Content Warning: ableism, disfiguremisia, emotional manipulation/ emotional abuse

[I.D. First page of a three page comic, using Big Mama from ROTTMNT and a fan design for her assistant. In this comic, Venus is a small child. She is based on a yellow-bellied slider and has stripes around her eyes, going up her forehead, down her chin and neck, and around her arms and legs. She also has a mixed bilateral cleft lip, with a complete cleft on the right side of her mouth and a much smaller incomplete cleft on the left. She's missing a tooth under her complete cleft.

In the first panel, Big Mama holds her hands out towards Venus, and says "Turtleboo!" Her speech bubbles are cloudlike, with small dots and hearts hovering around them. Venus reaches out too, an excited grin on her face, and yells "Mama!!" In contrast, her speech bubbles are much smoother. In the second panel, Big Mama holds Venus and kisses her cheek. She says "How is my darling girl?" Venus smiles happily and says "Happy to shee you!" Big Mama responds, "Oh, good. I've come for a little chizzy-chat." End I.D. 1 of 2.]

Rest of comic under the cut, mind the content warnings above.

[I.D. The second page has three panels. The first is a closeup of the bottom half Big Mama's face, Venus leaning her head contently against Big Mama's cheek. Big Mama frowns very slightly. In the next panel, she smiles, and says "I've decided you need a new name, my poppet." Venus looks up at her with a questioning expression. In the third panel, Big Mama is shown from farther away, her eyes cut off by the panel's borders, with Venus in her arms and looking at her. Venus asks. "But why? I like Venush, Mama."

The final page has two panels. In the first, Big Mama bends down and sets Venus on the floor. Venus holds onto her hand and looks confused as Big Mama says "Oh, dearest, it just doesn't fit you." The next panel shows a close up of Venus' face, a look of shock and betrayal as tears gather in her eyes. Big Mama's hand rests on her head as she says "Venus was beautiful." The words are written in cursive, and lay over Venus, partially see through. Behind her is a pattern that looks like a heart beat monitor line, then transforms into a cluster of jagged, squiggly lines. End I.D. 2 of 2.]

A little backstory for why my version of Big Mama's assistant is referred to as both Venus and Frida: she originally was Venus, but was forced to pick a new name.

Big Mama does have her reasons for doing this (given that she basically kidnapped Venus from Draxum, the name change helps to hide her identity so Draxum won't try to get her back), but at the end of the day she knows it's cruel. She doesn't say things like this much, but when she does it's very intentional.

[bonefall]

So, your Clear Sky post is absolutely horrifying, but it was very needed, so thank you. What are your general thoughts on tackling his abuse for the AU? Like you've said, pretending he's a good guy is not the way to go, but are you planning on toning down *some* of the situations, just to give some of the cats a break? Clear Sky is a very realistic depiction of abusers, but that seems to come across even without victim number 25, yknow? I'm very curious about how you'd like to go about this.

My most recent big change was bringing Slash back into the fold, because I realized that it was actually a disservice to not address where DOTC's themes dip into Colonialism. It's a hard topic, and I'm still trying to work out the details, but I realized it was important.

With how BB!DOTC is such a MASSIVE overhaul, to properly address abuse and the ways it impacts you, ableism and its violence, and xenophobia broadly, a huge reworking of Slash belonged here too. He's one of the greatest examples of how badly WC demonizes non-Clanborn cats. I shouldn't dance around it.

That's what I need to do with Skystar.

MANY of his victims have happier endings than canon, though. Bumble is one of the most famous, bumped up into a major character and directly responsible for the formation of ThunderClan. Bright Storm is taking most of Gray Wing's roles. Birch and Alder are getting examined, with either a father who wants his kids back or Milkweed as the mate of Misty.

A lot of people will die because of him, even more will be hurt, but I see BB!DOTC as a story about victims and survivors.

Others might grab POVs here and there, but as a response to canon which I feel is Clear Sky's story told in many parts, I center this rewrite around Thunder Storm. The path of kindness he marches down, with love and with anger, and the people he helps.

So BB!Star Flower...

Previously I was playing her as ENTIRELY just manipulating Clear Sky. She was loyal to One Eye and trying to get at Skystar to bleed him dry for 8 lives to sacrifice; but connected to Thunderstar over recognizing him as a victim who deserves her idea of justice. So, she offers Thunderstar the final kill, so her father will be grateful to him and he'll get power AND the death of his abuser.

(When Thunderstar looks upon Skystar, pathetic and neutralized down to one life, he thinks about the collateral damage that will descend upon the forest if he accepts the deal. He decides that he has found the line between Justice and Justification. Of course he wants the power to make his enemies cower, protect his people, and eliminate Clear Sky so he never threatens them again; that's not the problem.

He can still do these things. He wouldn't NEED the power of a war god to do so.

But if One Eye returns, he will be endlessly hungry, ruthlessly dedicated to revenge, and set out to devour the whole forest. Everything would get worse, and even more people he loves would die. It's where his desire to destroy a monster would lead to him BECOMING one.)

Even on its face, it was previously missing an element. There's a step between "Starf decides to bring One Eye back" and "Starf offers Thunderstar the final kill" that was bare. This is the piece that was missing-- That she, herself, is trying to reach out to the only person who's ever really understood her.

But more importantly... I do feel this topic belongs here, in BB!DOTC. Abuse is a MAJOR theme. SKYSTAR is a monster already. He's harmed two wives in BB (Bright Storm and Falling Cry) and played toxic games with all three kits (Thunder Storm, Pale Sky, Tiger Sky).

And I'd avoid Star Flower being abused... why? Because it's uncomfortable to confront the pattern that Clear Sky displays? That in-canon, he tries to cut all his victims into the same ideal shape, from Storm to Thunder to Star Flower? ...it should be uncomfortable. Everything that I described in Clear Sky Is A Monster is rooted in the same desire for control, power, and punishment most abusive people share, he just happens to be a severe example.

Yes. That includes how he treats his child and romantic partners. The parallels that are drawn between Starf and Thunder are there because he wants power in the form of obedience. Starf replaces the son as a narrative award for his "growth" of not killing random people anymore for a while.

A cookie cutter is an effective tool because IT ONLY MAKES ONE SHAPE.

You know what's more uncomfortable? Reading canon!DOTC and seeing someone who hurt you reflected almost perfectly in the character the writers think did nothing wrong. Because of "good intentions" that were not there.

I will say though, just to be clear; I don't see a purpose in being more than PG-13 about serious topics for this project. I promise none of my intentions have changed. Nothing will be more graphic or gorey than canon WC-- just more intentional.

I'm keeping the sacrifice because it's dope. No one is taking this from me. Girl Moment: Killed her awful husband 8 times to count as 8 sacrifices and offered the last life to her buddy as a show of good will. How else do you make friends outside of high school

But I know now that Star Flower NEEDS to keep the canon fact she has very little agency, UNTIL that moment she snaps.

She's sacrificing one abuser to try and bring back a bigger, badder one, because in spite of everything, her father One Eye always made her feel safe. Even though he promised her off to Skystar, and expected her to be willing to die for him. She's followed every command, every order, past the death of his mortal vessel.

The first, and only, selfish choice she's ever made was in reaching out to Thunderstar to offer him the power of her father.

Thunderstar's Justice is a story about a Thunder Storm at the pinnacle of his arc, how the survivors of his Clan are settling into the new normal after the carnage of The First Battle, how Skystar's arrogance brings a violent god to the Forest... and the connection Thunderstar makes with the daughter of a monster.

[howlsofbloodhounds]

The newest newsletter just made me think of sn!Chara a LOT

Chara is not necessarily a "good person" but they were just a KID who was HURT

I believe that Chara just let their anger and pain out on Killer

Because hey, now that they have a "powerful" monster in their control, nothing can hurt them anymore

Nothing can hurt anyone anymore

(Idk what I'm yapping about but the newsletter just made me think so much about sn!Chara and their obsession with the number nine and having all the power just because they never had that power to begin with back on the surface and they believe they're having this twisted sense of protection mentality and believe they're saving everyone)

That was my first thought upon reading that very specific quote/letter too! I talked about it a bit here, but I’m glad others saw it too.

I subscribe to the idea that SN!Chara was a very hurt, badly abused child who eventually went on to continue the cycle of abuse by inflicting it on Sans and then later Killer.

Given the hints from Asriel that Chara wasn’t really the greatest person, it isn’t a stretch to think that maybe they weren’t always the kindest friend or sibling to Asriel, either. Even if the two did love eachother.

Of course none of this justifies what they went on to later do, but also important to remember that the Player has a part in Something New as well. A bigger part then it’s possible for us to play in the actual game, given all the code hacking and the possibility of basically completely changing the game—similar to the way XGaster is capable of doing to his universe with his Overwrite.

Basically anything Chara tried to do to stop us or hinder us or even inconvenience us that worked in the game didn’t work in Something New. The Player is truly above consequences. Chara, at the end of the day, is not real; nothing more than coded lines of script.

That type of thing can really give someone perspective. And likely not for the better.

So Killer was intended to be everything they wanted and needed. He fills the criteria for something new, what the player wanted to see, but hes much more than that to Chara.

Eventually, even if not from the beginning. Perhaps at first he was intended to be the to free them from the Player, even. Destroy the world and move on to the next.

He’s their friend, their partner, their creation. Their weapon. Their protector. I’m sure he was made to fulfill any role they required of him.

Perhaps Chara even started to grow reattached to the world through Killer, which he undeniably began to see as weakness and caused him great dissonance and confusion—as it went sharply against everything they spent all these years teaching him. Against the image of Chara that had been cultivated in his mind—as someone invincible and untouchable.

Chara wouldn’t make it obvious that they’re the one who needed him, after all. What if he realizes that he doesn’t need them anymore. What if goes back to being Sans and he hates them for what they did. What if he tried to leave. Then who will keep them safe.

{ @orchidlikesgamez }

[venusandsaturnsrings]

sigh… i need to talk more about frat boy taru, he’s plaguing my mind…

he’s a nasty sleaze not above drugging you to get his way. star of the football team, top grades in all his classes, a slew of students and professors alike wrapped around his fingers, and yet he’s enamoured with you. perhaps it’s the dichotomy between yourself in him. a slightly egocentric and manipulative sinner wrapped in a pretty package of false smiles, teasing fingers, and suave comments versus your own doe eyes, bashful nature, and innocently dense disposition. his cock throbs at the mere thought of imbuing you with his own degeneracy. make no mistake, the whispers of his vile nature are true, but he’s got a soft spot for you. give him what he wants, no needs, and you’ll have the world in your soft palms. maybe you just need a little push, a bit of sabotage here and a dash of nauseatingly sweet touches there and you’ll be his.

[abubblingcandle]

Augusnippets Day 21 - Delirium - Ted Lasso

cw concussion, past child abuse, manipulation

“I’m fine,” Jamie growled, “passed your fucking tests didn’t I?” “I think we’ll let the professionals tell us that Jamie,” Ted scoffed. Jamie was flushed red, his eyes were flicking everywhere and there was already a solid bruise working it’s way to the surface on his cheekbone. “He passed all the tests.” “See Jamie … wait what?”

Here on AO3 @augusnippets

This match had been a cacophony of disasters. It was no one’s fault it just seemed like AFC Richmond had collectively broken a mirror and had seven years of bad luck bestowed upon them. This display of celestial hatred culminated in Jamie sat on the turf with physios checking his brain for any bumps. The boys were grabbing drinks apart from Isaac who stood there looking very bashful as it was his shoulder that had caused Jamie all of this bother. But thankfully Jamie was ushed back to his feet and was batting off the hands of the physios as they tried to help him to the sideline. Jamie locked eyes and glared at Cockburn who was warming up to come on in his place if needed. “I’m fine,” Jamie growled, “passed your fucking tests didn’t I?”

“I think we’ll let the professionals tell us that Jamie,” Ted scoffed. Jamie was flushed red, his eyes were flicking everywhere and there was already a solid bruise working it’s way to the surface on his cheekbone.

“He passed all the tests.”

“See Jamie … wait what?” Ted was so ready to use the physios answers to tell him to head down the tunnel but he was fine?

“See I told you now the lads are playing a man down and they need me out there so any more fucking questions or can I go play?” Jamie spat out. That was odd. Jamie was being Loanee Jamie levels of defensive and he really didn’t look good.

“I don’t know,” Ted hummed looking to Roy and Beard for help. Beard shrugged but Roy was staring at Jamie with intent. “We are told if in doubt sit it out, there were very convincing posters in the training I have finally been forced to do.”

“There is no doubt. I can walk in a fucking straight line. I met all my baselines. I answered all the questions right. My face really hurts but that’s cause Isaac’s got a hard shoulder not anything else. You want me to answer more questions, I can tell you who the president is. I can tell you my birthdate, my address,” Jamie ranted, inching and inching towards the pitch.

“What did you have for breakfast this morning?” Roy asked. Both Ted and Jamie turned to look at him with a frown.

“We’re still one man down coach,” Beard reminded Roy.

“Tell me what you had for breakfast this morning and you can go back out there,” Roy stood his ground.

“Granola, strawberry bits, natural yoghurt, honey and a protein shake,” Jamie rolled his eyes and turned to face the pitch.

“That’s wrong.”

Jamie stopped in his tracks, “that’s what I always have for breakfast before a game.”

“Not today. Today you had cheese and spinach omelettes because Phoebe found a recipe on tik tok. Cockburn you’re on,” Roy declared grabbing Jamie by the shoulder only for Jamie to flinch and topple precariously to the side. Now Roy had called him on his bullshit it was a lot easier for Ted to see the flaws in Jamie’s façade. He was barely remaining upright, that was why he didn’t want to be touched by the physios. His eyes were flickering side to side as he was taking in information, Jamie had no clue where he was. And now his skin took on a dangerous   shade of white as his breath hitched. The subs board was being prepared and Jamie’s struggles, now in Roy’s grasp, resumed.

“I’m fine. Get off. They need me out there,” Jamie protested but Roy’s grip remained too strong.

“No. We are going inside.”

The end of the match, a dirty 1-1, found Roy, Ted and Jamie sequestered in one of the away treatment rooms. Jamie was still in his muddy kit and the bruise on his face nearly matched the mud stained home kit in colour. His hair was dried stuck in all sorts of directions, his pallor was sickly and his head was in a bucket. “We need to talk about this Jamie?” Ted sighed, leaning up against the treatment bed Jamie was sat on.

“Can we not, my head hurts,” Jamie whined so pitifully that Ted was actually considering letting Jamie go get some rest and then having this conversation.

Roy was not, “oh so now your head hurts. Got over it and spill.”

Jamie looked up and levelled Roy with a glare that might have been intimidating if he didn’t look like a sickly child throwing a tantrum.

“Spill,” Roy growled again.

“There’s nothing to spill. I thought I was fine then I wasn’t,” Jamie sighed.

“How did you pass your baselines? Why did you start lying about what you could remember when you clearly couldn’t remember it?” Roy was really taking no prisoners from where he leaned against the door, blocking Jamie’s exit even though he was in no condition to make a break for it.

The silence stretched out between them and Ted only managed to keep his own mouth shut by observing the battle of wills between the assistant coach and the star player. “A concussion is two weeks off after symptoms end,” Jamie broke the deadlock with a timid whisper.

“Yes it is, for good reason,” Roy sighed.

“I can’t afford two weeks off. The team can’t afford two weeks with me off,” if the room had been two feet bigger Ted and Roy wouldn’t have heard the confession.

“Jamie,” Ted leapt to try and reassure Jamie that the team could survive without him as he healed but Roy cut him off with a shake of his head.

“And so what did you do?” Roy asked.

“It’s something my dad trained into me. Cause like if you can run then you can play and any missed playing time is a missed opportunity. So have a pre-game routine. Same breakfast, same workout, same way of getting to matches, same outfit,” Jamie’s grip on the bucket was white knuckled but he was in a flow now. Ted shouldn’t stop him from talking but he deathly wanted to. They had enough of the picture right. They could stop Jamie spilling his metaphorical guts.

“So that if anyone asks you about it you’ll know off by heart even if you can’t remember that morning,” Roy groaned.

Jamie nodded, slowly and then leaned back over the bucket.

“And …”

“And he taught me how to quickly pick up information about around me to work out about the match. Looking at the crowd and stadium to work out where we are. Find the scoreboard as quickly as possible. I also rigged the basline tests,” Jamie’s head was nearly in the bucket in his embarrassment.

“How do you rig concussion tests?” Ted asked even though he really didn’t want to know the answer.

“Under perform in the beginning of season baselines,” Jamie whispered. Ted’s heart sunk. That was … god that was worse than Ted could have thought it would be. This wasn’t just a spur of the moment, here’s how to lie so you can play. This was planned. Jamie must have been doing this since he was a minor. His father, if the man even deserved that name, had got so in this kid’s head that for half his life he had been lying to be able to put himself in more danger. That was …

“I’m going to kill him,” Roy growled and for once Ted was verging on joining him.

“Roy, it’s nothing,” Jamie sighed. “Just a habit.”

“Well we can break habits. Beard managed to kick his recreational drugs habit with my help and I can help you too,” Ted forced a smile to his face but they could all see the pain in his eyes.

“Beard absolutely still does drugs,” Jamie muttered.

“Well second time lucky,” Ted shrugged and that dragged a pained chuckle from Jamie.

“I am taking you home to mine, where I can watch you and make sure you don’t get into any more trouble. You are taking off those two weeks after the symptoms are gone and it will be a medical professional who decides when that is. Then you are redoing your baseline tests, you will do them properly or I will feed you your own intestines. Are we clear?” Roy stated, walking forwards just adding to the thin layer of menance.

“Crystal,” Ted nodded.

“Not you Lasso,” Roy groaned.

“Yeah coach,” Jamie signed resigned to his fate. Ted did not envy the lad the motherhenning he was going to experience over the next three weeks. But he deserved it. Dear god did he deserve it.

[oboetemasuka]

Lights, Camera, Make a Wish!

@purgemarchlockdown is my Milgramblr bestie!

And you know what Milgramblr besties do? Get sweet, sweet revenge on the people who attacked them!

@good-beans, you have a lovely little AU here.

How would you like it...

...if we destroyed it?

(CWs: Cults, Child Manipulation, Child Abuse)

(Nott Note: Conceptually this is close to Es Quest in some ways but this Isn't Es Quest. Make of that what you will.)

(3233 words)

-

Amane stared at the chair where the cat once sat, now left with only the broken collar and the handkerchief. Her mother did this... How horrible. But...

If it was such a horrible thing to do, then it was only right for Amane to carry out punishment as she had been taught. She flipped her frown into a grin as she headed home.

Such a shame about the cat, though. This won't bring it back. I wish it didn't have to die...

Just then, a rabbit with a hat and antlers bounded up to her.

"Hello there, Amane-chan!" 

It could talk? And how did it know her name?

"Oh, sorry to scare you. If you'll spare a moment of your time, I'll make it worth your while."

They were approaching a bus stop with a bench and an overhang.

"Okay."

Amane took a seat on the bench and closed the umbrella. The rabbit hopped up and sat next to her.

"Amane-chan, I heard you've been having troubled thoughts lately."

"Hm?" How could it hear thoughts? And wouldn't it be rude to presume she was troubled?

"You were going to do something drastic when you got home. Something you wouldn't be able to take back."

What was it getting at?

"You were going to kill your mother."

How could it know that? She hadn't uttered her thoughts to any other soul. "What is the goal of this conversation? What do you intend to do with what I tell you?"

"Well... I was wondering if I could change your mind."

"Why?" Was this rabbit about to get all preachy?

"Life is full of trials. It's all part of being human. But if you make such a big choice on impulse, it could follow you for the rest of your life. I wouldn't want you to have regrets."

"What are you..." Amane huffed. "How arrogant."

"Say, Amane-chan, if your mother hadn't killed the cat, would you be on your way to kill her?"

How did it know about the cat?

"Hesitating, are you? You can be honest. I won't tell a soul."

Amane contemplated her response. "No." She wouldn't be able to justify her actions if her mother hadn't killed the cat. The action would not have been warranted under the rules of her faith.

Just then, a cat walked under the overhang, soaking wet. It had a red collar with a bell, and a handkerchief was tied around its leg. It pounced up next to Amane, on the empty side of the bench.

Could it really be? Amane had seen the discarded accessories earlier. This might be another cat. But when Amane checked the collar, she found the same markings she had left on it before.

"What- what do you want from me?"

"I just want you to believe in me. Here, have a token from me." 

The rabbit hopped onto Amane's shoulder, and she felt a little weight around her neck. She brought her hand up and felt a band and a smooth, round charm hanging from it.

"That is a heart choker. A symbol of your unyielding compassion. Now, Amane-chan, I'm going to need you to do some things for me."

"All of a sudden?"

"Consider it an exchange for your cat."

Amane nodded, though she wasn't so sure about the rabbit. If he wanted something from her…

"When you go back home, your father will be there. He will be very proud of you. Great things are going to happen tonight. I understand you might feel a bit uneasy, but you'll understand in due time."

The rabbit hopped back to the bench and onto the ground.

"Farewell, Amane-chan. I will see you again."

Huh. What a strange encounter.

-

Just as the rabbit said, Amane found her father waiting for her as she opened the door. She cautiously walked up to him, worried that he might have heard about the cat incident. But instead, he knelt down to hug her and pat her head.

"Amane, I heard that you have been a very good girl while I was away."

"I… Yes, I was." She looked over her father's shoulder to see her mother sweeping the living room, her back turned to them.

Her father let go and stood up. "And so I wanted to surprise you." He handed her a letter stamped with a golden M. "Our community has been invited to be featured in a documentary. Specifically you."

"Documentary? What is that?"

"It is a movie that showcases parts of real life. In this case, it is about faith. You will be representing the community."

Amane nodded respectfully, waiting for her father to continue.

"You leave in a week. In the meantime, we'll be helping you prepare to look your best. We arranged your absence with the school."

That was sudden. Amane was worried that this might be an excuse to discipline her for longer behind closed doors, but to her relief, her parents did not lay a hand on her for the entire time. Her mother hardly looked at her.

The next week, before the sun rose, Amane stepped out of her apartment with a lightly packed bag. Her father guided her to the car waiting for her on the street. He gave her a hug before she got in the car and one last wave before it departed.

Amane leaned back into the seat and closed her eyes. Part of her was sad that her mother didn't bother wishing her goodbye after making breakfast—or even speaking to her all week long. But what would her mother have said anyway? Honestly, their relationship had gone sour ever since the taser incident. Or… had it been much longer ago? Didn't Amane's mother love her? But what did love even mean anymore? To spread mercy with no limits. But where was the mercy all this time?

No matter. Maybe some distance would do them well.

A little bell rang. Something pressed down on Amane's thigh. And then another thing. Something small. Something that tickled. Amane's eyes snapped open, and she saw a little fuzzball curling up in her lap. The cat! She checked the collar and confirmed it was her cat.

"Is that yours?" the driver asked. "It seems to be quite attached to you."

Amane stroked the cat between the ears. "Yes. It is mine." She pet the cat a little more before drifting off to sleep.

"Welcome, Amane-chan, I've been waiting for you." A short-statured man greeted Amane as she stepped out of the vehicle. She rubbed her eyes and looked around at the empty indoor lot before he led her into a bright lobby.

"Who-" She was still trying to reorient herself after the nap. The man held her bag, and the cat walked by her her side opposite to the man. "Who are you?"

"I am the creature that visited you on your way home yesterday."

"You?" The ridiculousness of that statement shook her awake. "You are that rabbit?"

"Rabbit? No! I'm a Jackalope. You would do well to remember that."

"You can… change forms?"

"Indeed!" He sounded so cheerful that it was startling.

"Jacka… lope…"

"Part jackal, part antelope," he said patiently. 

"Jackalope…"

"There you go. No need to be scared of me. I will be your best friend around here."

Jackalope led Amane to a hallway and opened a door to one of the bedrooms. "This is where you will sleep in the off-season."

"Off season? Why would there-" Amane saw a strange garment hanging on a hook by the doorway. A white coat with black straps.

"That will be your uniform when the season begins."

"Uniform? That looks a bit too restrictive to be-"

"That's just for show. Oh! Pardon me, I ought to come clean with you. The project isn't a documentary about faith."

"Then…" Amane blinked, trying to process everything she had just seen. "What did my parents agree to?"

"I apologize, but I had to twist the truth a bit. This is actually a project about murderers—or rather, would-be murderers—showing the inner workings of their mind through music videos."

"This was all a trick…?"

"I had to do whatever it would take to get you out of there. Otherwise, one of you could have died. It would be tragic to lose a lovely young life as yours, and it wouldn't do well for you to be a murderer either."

Jackalope quickly described the experiment to Amane. An amnesiac teenager was going to decide whether her "crime" was forgivable?

Amane looked around the room with uncertainty.

"Chin up, Amane-chan. This is a great opportunity for self-reflection. Besides, this time away from your parents will be good for your growth."

That was not assuring at all. But it wasn't like she wanted to run back to her parents now.

-

"This is too flashy. I refuse to wear it." Amane gave the frilly skirt one more glance before turning away. Then she turned back to look at it again. She couldn't help but admire the pastel yellow and the volume and the cute little puffballs at four corners-

"Would you like to tone it down, then?" one of the designers asked.

She was about to nod her head in response, but an impulse led her to shake her head instead.

"No, not at all! I mean, if it's for a higher purpose, I will take it."

Amane twirled in front of the mirror to see the skirt poof up. She giggled and twirled again. And again. And again.

"Alright," the director said. "That's enough spinning for now. We have a video to film."

But Amane stole one last glance before she would step onto the set. The red heart on the choker—a substitution for the costume's original bowtie—popped with the rest of the costume's red accents.

She smiled as she stepped onto the bright, colorful set, then gasped in awe when she saw the mascots standing before her. For a second, the worries came back to her. Why did these people—this Jackalope—know so much about her personal life? But she shoved those thoughts aside. In this strange and unfamiliar place, the mascots were a piece of home.

Amane's vision for her music video was to display the righteousness of her faith. There was no need to bring up her almost-victim; all that mattered was that she conveyed why the deed was the right thing to do.

-

In contrast with the rest of the facility, the panopticon was dark and gloomy. No amount of lights could lift the atmosphere on their own.

Jackalope guided Amane across the panopticon to her cell. It was far less extravagant than her dorm, but it would do. All the better not to spoil herself. Still, Jackalope allotted her a nice collection of textbooks.

"If it helps, you could consider it a sleepover with the other prisoners."

The other prisoners? What would they be like?

Amane began sorting the textbooks after Jackalope left.

The girls were quick to invite Amane to spend time with them. Yuno, Muu, and Mahiru. All of them were considerably older than her but more than content to play frivolous games. Yuno did a few cat's cradle tricks, and Amane had to pretend she was impressed for the sake of politeness. She didn't do a very good job of plastering emotions on her face. A shadow cast over her, and she turned to see a guy standing and staring intently at Yuno's tricks.

"Hey, Fuuta, is it?" Yuno waved at him with a rickety bridge wound across her fingers. "Want to join us?"

Fuuta snapped out of his trance. "N-no! I don't have time to waste on shallow games like that. Brats." He turned away.

"Rude," Yuno muttered.

Muu managed to catch Jackalope in rabbit form and invited Amane to pet him. Amane made the biggest racket as she rushed to take up the offer. As she settled, Mahiru offered to style her hair. Amane didn't have much of it (less to take care of and be tempted by), but she couldn't resist getting a style that would last all day without falling apart. 

The cell was too dark to study in. Not that there was anything wrong with the lights, but the slate-colored walls didn't reflect much of it, making it feel dimmer. Amane picked up the cat—Neko-san, she now called it—and headed out of her cell.

As she made her way to the dining hall, she bumped into a guy who was hunching his shoulders and staring at his feet.

"Ah!" He stepped back and glanced at her and Neko-san before looking away again. "I- uh- I'm s-sorry!" He quickly turned tail towards the cells.

A woman walked by Amane in the hallway, looking her tensely in the eyes and giving a quick nod.

Three men were gathered at one edge of the dining table. Amane ignored them and placed Neko-san on a chair at the other end. She put her backpack down next to it and dug out a Japanese workbook.

"A cat…" the oldest one remarked. "I'd have liked to have one."

"Is that… what is a child doing here?" the light-haired one muttered. "How could someone so young be driven to kill?"

How rude. Why couldn't people just keep their thoughts to themselves? Amane tried not to listen as she took a seat, but it wasn't easy when the room suddenly went quiet. She looked up and glared at the man who said that.

"Shidou-kun, did you have to say that out loud?" The youngest-looking one of the group nudged him before walking over to Amane.

"Sorry about Shidou-kun. He's the sentimental type." The young man held out his hand. "I'm Kayano Mikoto. And you are?"

Amane gingerly shook Mikoto's hand. "I am Momose Amane. I hope Milgram will not be this…"

"…inhospitable? Yeah, I hope so too. I think we're all just terrible at first impressions."

As the other two men returned to their conversation, Mikoto pulled up a chair and sat next to Amane. "So, you're the studious type. What for? It's not like there's any school going on."

"It is something I do for fun."

"Ah, is that so? I'm just glad I don't have to study anymore. You see, I only did the bare minimum…"

He stopped his sentence when Amane began scrawling notes in the margins of her workbook.

“My father is a truly wonderful person. He’s honest, values fairness and justice above all else, and will work himself to the bone for other people’s sake…” Amane said. Mahiru surprised her with the question but she didn’t mind answering it. Still, she was curious. “Why do you want to know?”

Mahiru hummed. “Oh, I was wondering what sort of parents you must have to raise a good child like you. I’d like to have a family someday you see.” She chuckled. “Maybe I’ll do so well you will want to be a part of my family too!”

What? “I-I see. Well, I am already pleased with the family I have now, Mahiru-san. I am not looking for another one.”

That response made her giggle. “I was joking, Amane-chan.”

Oh, then-

“But, if your looking for another member if your family, then I’ll be happy to join yours!”

…

“Alright, Mahiru-san.”

-

The process of choosing was always a bit stressful but Jackalope was very pride of his selection this time around.

Eight of the candidates were fine, nothing special but fine for his purposes. 010 would have been rather entertaining to watch and her drive to fight was truly something awe-inspiring, but in all honesty she scared him a bit. Some entertainment is just not worth the risk.

001 was a bit more remarkable than the rest. Isolated, anxious, and hungry for praise. He would have been a better choice if he did actually kill his sister really. But then it would have been harder to set this up. Plus he would have burned out faster than the rest of them. Tragic really. That boy was still not good enough for the praise he so desperately wants.

But 008…He wanted to ignore her at first. Too stubborn, too opinionated. The risk was too high for the reward. But, as usual, humans do all the work for him. He was still careful. Still cautious. But the humans have once again rejected her. Even if she didn't even see that fully.

Amane Momose…that's a good name. He'll make sure it'll live on forever in people's hearts.

-

Guilty. Unforgivable.

"She needs to realize her sins."

Es's voice rang throughout Amane's brain. Not just Es's voice… so many unfamiliar voices.

There were some words of support mixed in, but they were drowned out by the harsh reprimands.

How did it come to this?

If she had actually gone through with this, would she have been safe from the judgment of outsiders?

Or would her community have reacted differently than she expected?

If she had gotten home before her father and gone through with the deed, would her father have praised her? Or would he have looked at her with scorn? Or worse?

Was he still planning to have her represent their community? Would he still have presented it as a treat? Or would it have been a punishment, being sent away?

So many possibilities ran through Amane's mind.

Is this why Jackalope insisted on getting her away from her home before it was too late?

To prevent any of these from becoming reality?

Es pitied her as this poor, brainwashed child of a cult but still tried to correct her by being harsh on her. The nerve of them…

-

When Amane woke up she felt a tightness around her neck. She sat up and heard the noise of a bell. She looked around and found Neko-san sleeping beside her. Strange, maybe it was moving in its sleep? 

She walked over to the mirror, a bell still ringing. She looked back to the cat but nothing seemed to have changed about it. She took a gulp of air. Something's wrong.

She looked into the mirror. The choker was on her neck. Did she not take it off before going to sleep? Her brow furrowed. The unease settled into the room before, cautiously, she shook her head.

A bell rang.

She shook it again.

The bell rang. 

Amane looked over to the cat, and to her. Did one of the prisoners do this to annoy her? That's rather immature of them. And unnerving, they shouldn't be able to get into her room. And she would have noticed them if they went in or messed with the collar.

Why is she calling it a collar? That's not what this is. That's not what this is. That's not-

She reached her hand up towards it. 

She found herself on the floor. Shaking. Neko-san must have woken up because it was right next to her. Rubbing her head on- no. No don't touch her. She moved away. It'll get shocked as well...It shouldn't...

What was she talking about? She was wet all-over...even worse considering the shock shock shock- No, that didn't happen that didn't actually-

She held herself closely. In. Out. In. Out. She's not there right now. Neko-san's fur is here. She can't be there because its fur is here. Something else happened then. What was that? 

What happened to her?

[cafeleningrad]

Akio is undoubtedly the manipulator in the shadows, keeping the cyclical nature of (patriarchal and power) abuse spinning in his self made world of Ohtori. And yet I had the thought that he too is the product of such cyclical abuse. Both Touga and Anthy are the characters directly showcasing the cyclical nature of abuse. Touga is complicit because Akio's system promises him maybe, eventually gaining the absolute power so none could ever have the power to exploit him again. My theor is that Akio kinda did the same. (Probably I will write a longer meta about the thin line between manipulation and agency at Ohtori in the future, although I will leave it at Akio being very conscious of what he does, Touga to a certain degree, too.)

There never was a pure princehood because even at best and pure intentions like Utena, Dios as a child/young teen, Touga in Adolescence, that ideal necessitates someone to be made weak in order for the prince to shine. For the prince itself following the princehood in his idolized (unreal) form will only lead to death. Touga drowned saving Juri, Dios was at the brink of death before Anthy saved him.

What's notable that both boys at their most noble die in the stage of boyhood. The role of the prince will kill them when they're idealistic and naive. Dios especially had his duty put on externally from countless people. The consequences of him failing them would be to endure their collective, unrestrained wrath. Which leads me to speculate that the prince at his idealised stage (the prince in boyhood) can be exploited, is to a degree rendered powerless to the will of those who demand him serving their needs. That's not to say there's either the boyhood prince stage or the corrupted prince stage at his most powerabuse but that all performance of ideals comes to a high cost of oneself. Dios as child might not have had an understanding or perspective how his power selfishly for the very adult things Akio uses it.

If that is the case, Akio in adulthood, like Touga, flipped his role. Realising that the princess' happiness depended on the prince, Akio could exploit the princess to have her be the one to be the prince. As a child Dios was demanded to serve his purpose to exhaustion. As an adult Akio considered how people could exhaust themselves for the prince. Edit: In the end princehood always necessitates the exploitation of all believing in it. Foremost the princess, and also the prince if he tries to perform his role ideally.

[lyacinthus]

SLIGHT BLOOD TW !!!

"Father"

[purgemarchlockdown]

I like calling Lucky, Kotoko's "Damsel" Because what Kotoko did is basically the modern day equivalent of rescuing a kidnapped princess from a tower. With how Lucky was Actually Kidnapped and how it's possible that she was Related to the Kidnappers (thanks candckirby for that thought) and if she Is that would make her related to the CEO (the king in a sense) it really works out like that.

Kotoko is Lucky's Hero, her prince, her savior. She idolizes her completly and truly and wants to be like her but is that really good for her? Savior and Victim (Prince and Princess) are such binary concepts, ones where agency is only allowed for one side and the other has none.

Come on, rely on me, go on

Useless weaklings need to shut up and let her protect them. Their role is to be powerless while her role is to be powerful.

And if a Savior has no one to save then they have to Make someone else Their victim.

(Yonah)

Es: L-let me go, Kotoko... Kotoko: I know it well. It's so hard to hold the responsibility of a guard all alone. I've also felt this way. You are such a kind person. You can't stand the prison changing with the power of your choices. So you need someone to be with. Leave all of the dirty work to me. Es: I'm... a kind person?.. Kotoko: Does your head hurt anymore? Don't worry. Leave it to me, and together we'll be able to create the right MILGRAM.

[bit-b]

CW: Groomers, Abusers, Manipulation

In this extra-long episode of 'Internet Safety Bit', I detail the warning signs of being manipulated by a groomer.

[fnaf-is-awesome201]

Haphephobia

Haphephobia [haf-uh-foh-bee-uh] noun- the fear of being touched.

During her time in control, Vanny made sure that the murders she committed were an unforgettable experience for Vanessa…

Here we go, we got another one. Once again, based on an idea from @halogenrobotics ‘s idea list. This time, one based on Idea 6. Once again, it’s pretty long, so most of it will be under the read more.

WARNINGS: This story contains blood, death, and descriptions of violence. If that’s not something you’re comfortable with, feel free to scroll past it. You have been warned.

-------

A scene that was all too familiar was playing out in the darkened, maze-like hallways of the Pizzaplex. Vanny stalked the halls, following a fresh trail of blood to find her target, her laugh echoing off the walls as she pranced along, getting closer and closer.

“Oh, the children always want to play hide-and-seek!” Vanny chuckled to herself. “Too bad they always lose…” She giggled gleefully as she skipped down the hall, the blood trail starting to form small pools, with more and more pools dotting the floor the further she went. “Isn’t that right, Vanessa?”

“Please… you don’t have to do this…" Vanessa said from within her mental prison. Vanny could feel Vanessa trying to resist, trying to force her to stop. She laughed and continued down the hall, now slightly faster.

“Aw, do you really think so? Why not? Why should I stop?” She paused for a moment to find the trail again, the blood beginning to blend in with the dark floors in the low light.

“Because it’s wrong!” Vanny scoffed at Vanessa’s response, tilting her head to the side.

“You’ve tried that one already. I couldn’t care less if it’s wrong or right!” She heard a faint noise behind one of the doors near the end of the hallway. She hummed quietly to herself in amusement, adjusting her course slightly and making her way to the door.

“… don’t you have enough by now? Don’t you have enough to ‘fix him’, as you said?” Vanessa replied, desperate for a way to convince Vanny to stop.

For a second, there was nothing but silence and the sound of Vanny’s footsteps as she approached the door. Then, Vanny began to laugh, her slight chuckle quickly building into a maniacal cackle as she paused in front of the door.

“Oh, Vanessa… poor, sweet, naive Vanessa,” she sighed as she attempted to control her laughter. “You still think this is all for Him?”

“… w-what?” Vanessa replied after a moment's pause. 

Vanny quietly giggled to herself as she ran the finger of her glove across the blade of her knife, leaving streaks of blood behind on the light fabric. After staring at her bloodied glove for a moment, she raised her hand up to her mask, motioning for Vanessa to be quiet.

“Shhhhhh… Want to hear a secret, Vanessa?” She lowered her voice, now speaking just barely above a whisper. “I only needed one child to ‘have enough’ to fix him.” She put a hand over the mouth of the mask in a shocked gesture, letting out an overly dramatic gasp before snickering at Vanessa’s stunned silence.

“...but… why-” 

Vanny leaned against the wall next to the door, letting out a sigh as she gently shook her head.

“You don’t get it yet?” She tilted her head to the side and mockingly tsk-tsked at Vanessa. “Don’t you see? It’s all because of you!” She pushed off of the wall and meandered around the space in front of the door. “I revel in your misery. The sound of your suffering is music to my ears!” Her tone was suddenly very stern, her words practically dripping with venom and contempt. She hummed slightly as she walked back over to the door, leaving her hand hovering on the door handle for a second. “Besides, it’s just too much fun!” She cackled again as Vanessa stayed silent.

Vanny slowly opened the door, the creaking hinges echoing into the darkness of the packed storage room behind it. She stared into the darkness, scanning every inch of the entrance before taking a step inside.

“Ready or not, here I come!” She began wandering through the rows of shelves stacked high with boxes, searching high and low. “Where are you?” She hummed quietly to herself as she continued on, the eyes of her mask casting a slight red glow on the space around her.

Suddenly, she heard the sound of boxes falling over near the back of the room, the contents clanging against the metal shelves. She whipped around to face the noise and laughed.

“Found you…” She quietly strolled through the maze of boxes, making her way to the back corner of the room. She took one last turn, and sitting curled up in the corner was a young boy. He was sitting in a small pool of blood, his now red sweater wrapped around a deep gash in his leg. Tears were streaming down his face as he tried to stay quiet, hoping Vanny would just pass by him.

Vanny slowly walked forward, pretending she couldn’t see the boy and searching the shelves instead of looking at him. As she passed in front of him, out of the corner of her eye she noticed him trying to grab something on the floor in front of him. She quickly turned towards him and pounced, using her arm to pin him against the wall. He dropped the flashlight he was reaching for, causing the light to turn on, casting a flickering beam of light onto Vanny’s mask.

“No! Stop it! Leave him alone!” Vanessa’s pleas went ignored as Vanny stared deep into the child’s eyes as he sobbed loudly, his face twisted in pain and his eyes full of fear. She reached a hand up to her mask, and the lights flickered off for a moment. When the light turned back on, Vanessa’s face was staring back at the child, her eyes wide and an unnerving smile spread across her face. After a moment, the boy’s face dropped as he recognized the face staring back at him.

“V-Vanessa…?” The boy’s voice was quiet and weak, his face pale from fear and loss of blood. “Wh-why…” Vanny lifted the knife in her hand, the remaining blood on the blade glinting in the light. The boy tried to free himself, but he was far too weak to fight back against Vanny. She laughed at the boy, amused by his futile struggle.

“STOP! PLEASE, STOP!” Vanessa internally cried out.

“I win…” Vanny said as she brought the knife down, plunging it deep into the boy’s chest.

“NO!” 

 Vanny placed the knife down at her side, staring into the boy’s eyes as he bled.

“Time for my favorite part.” She hugged the child close to her chest as he began to bleed out, watching the light leave his eyes.

“Please… no… not again…” Vanessa thought to herself as she felt the blood start to seep through the fabric of the costume. The boy’s pulse slowed, and his breathing became slow and shallow. ”No… no… I…”

Vanny stood up and laughed, a terrifying smile spread across her face as she put her mask back on.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” Vanessa thought before slowly going silent, her guilt and grief weighing down heavily upon her. Vanny hummed to herself as she carried the child, calmly making her way back to the door.

“Oh, come on now, why so blue?” She giggled softly to herself as she made her way back out into the hallway. “After all…” she paused for a moment, her gleeful facade fading away as her tone shifted, becoming far more serious and sinister, “This is all YOUR fault.” She skipped down the hall, her own bloody footprints trailing behind her. “YOU found Him. YOU found all the pieces. YOU put him back together. YOU are the reason we’re all here in the first place.” She sighed and tilted her head to the side. “Face the facts, Vanessa. If it weren’t for you, none of this would have happened in the first place. It’s all. Your. Fault.”

“...I-I didn’t know, I…I thought it was just… a game…” Vanny tipped her head back at Vanessa’s response and cackled so loudly that the sound created a metallic ringing as it echoed off of the metal doors in the hallway.

“You really think that matters, Vanessa?! It changes NOTHING! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!” She continued to laugh, seemingly unable to stop, as she carried the child through the winding halls of the Pizzaplex, going deeper and deeper into the caverns below the building.

“I think that’s enough for now, don’t you?” Vanny paused for a moment, looking down at the child in her arms. “Goodbye, Vanessa. See you again real soon…”

“WAIT-” 

Vanessa’s world faded away, her plea again falling on deaf ears, and once again she was alone, trapped in a void with no escape.

Over the next several months, Vanny continued on her rampage, tormenting Vanessa. The number of missing children continued to grow as time went on. She was an ever-present, looming threat, showing no signs of slowing down or stopping. Then, one day, something changed…

—

As her surroundings began to focus back in, Vanessa could feel that something was different this time. Vanny was running up towards the catwalks that led to her hideout, and Vanessa could feel Vanny’s anxiety building. She wasn’t laughing as she usually was, and she wasn’t calmly tracking someone to their inevitable demise. She was furious, locked in a frenzied chase with an unknown target.

Instead of being scared, Vanessa felt confused for some reason. “Why does this seem so… familiar?” she thought to herself.

Before she could continue this line of thinking, her attention was drawn to a familiar door at the other end of the catwalk.

“I wouldn’t want you to miss THIS one, Vanessa…” Vanny tightened her grip on the knife as she ran towards the door. When she got to the door, she was shocked to discover that it refused to open, no matter what she tried. As she looked through the window, she could see that it was locked from the inside, and there was a child inside her room, trying to finish the game on the arcade machine she had hidden there.

“... Gregory?” Vanessa could feel Vanny getting angrier, seething with rage as she tried to think of a way to get in.

“You think you can stop me so easily, you brat?!” Vanny grabbed the railing to the catwalk and pulled as hard as she could, breaking off one of the bars in the process. “I CAN’T BE STOPPED!” She raised the piece of railing, and quickly bashed it against the window, causing it to crack and splinter. She threw the railing down and punched through the weakened glass, pushing the button on the other side to open the door.

As the door slid open, she charged at Gregory, her knife held high above her head. Gregory turned to try and run, but it was already too late. The knife pierced deep into his chest just as he turned, and he fell to the floor, his eyes wide in shock.

Vanny let out a triumphant cackle, taking her knife and throwing it to the side.

“I ALWAYS WIN!” She laughed for a moment or two, staring down at Gregory as he began to bleed onto the floor. However, her laughter was soon silenced as she heard a noise from the arcade machine. She turned towards it and froze. The screen flashed to black, and an error message was flashing on the screen. Gregory had finished the game.

“No…” Vanessa watched as Vanny’s vision started to dissolve into a mess of glitches and static. “No, no, no!” She watched as Vanny desperately slammed her hands on the buttons of the machine, trying in vain to undo what had been done. “NO!” She could feel Vanny fading away, still desperately clawing for control over Vanessa even as she began to disappear. Vanessa could hear Vanny’s shrieks and screams echo inside her head. It was the first and only time Vanny had ever expressed true terror. Finally, her cries ceased. Vanny was gone.

Vanessa reached out and braced herself against the wall, trying to keep herself from falling as she regained control of herself. As soon as she could, she quickly reached up and grabbed the mask, tearing it off and throwing it across the room, the red lenses shattering as they hit the wall. She gasped for air as soon as the mask was off, still too stunned to speak. She snapped out of it when she heard a faint gasping noise from elsewhere in the room.

“Gregory!” She ran over to him and knelt down beside him, staring in terror at the blood pool forming on the floor. “No no no, what have I done…” 

She tore off her gloves, holding them against his chest to try and stop the bleeding. The blood quickly soaked through the fabric, staining her hands red. After a second, she ripped off part of the costume to use to stop the bleeding, smearing blood on her white shirt underneath in the process. Vanessa desperately tried to wrap his wounds, doing anything she could think of to try to save him. 

“I-I’m so sorry, I… I didn’t… I would never… I-I…” she said through tears that were welling up in her eyes.

“I-is she… gone?” Gregory asked.

Vanessa froze, startled and worried. Gregory sounded very weak, his voice just barely above a whisper, his words uttered between choked gasps. Vanessa couldn’t respond at first, unable to form words. All she could manage to do was nod in response. Gregory let out a shallow sigh, somewhat relieved.

“I… I did it.” He smiled weakly at Vanessa. “At least I did… something right… something… good…before-”

Vanessa felt her stomach drop. While Gregory’s voice was weak, his tone was calm and sincere, despite the dire circumstances. He struggled more and more to speak as time passed.

“NO, don’t… please don’t say that… you won’t die, I-I promise. Just… just stay with me!” Vanessa replied.

Vanessa knew she couldn’t fix this, at least not all on her own. She looked around the room, desperate to find something she could use to call for help, but the room was barren. She looked back at Gregory, noticing that he was already bleeding through the fabric she had bandaged his wounds with. Seeing no other option, Vanessa carefully picked him up and carried him out of the room, trying to get to a phone.

“Vanessa?” Gregory was shaking and cold, and his skin was pale from loss of blood. “I… I-I’m scared…”

“No no no, i-it’s okay… y-you’ll be fine, I promise. Just hold on, please…” Vanessa said, trying to reassure him.

Vanessa picked up her pace, walking quickly through the maintenance hallways, trying to think of where she could find a phone. She could hear her heartbeat pounding in her ears, and her blind panic blurred her surroundings, making it harder to navigate through the maze of hallways before her. After walking for a little while, she wandered through a door and found herself by the front desk at the entrance to Fazer Blast. She looked around and saw a phone sitting on the front desk. She sighed, relieved, and took a few steps towards the phone. It was then that Vanessa noticed something that made her freeze dead in her tracks.

Gregory wasn’t moving.

Vanessa’s heart sank as she looked down at him. His eyes were closed, and his arms hung limp and lifeless at his sides.

“Gregory?” Vanessa got no response. “Gregory, please… wake up…”

The tears that Vanessa had been struggling to hold back now flowed freely down her face.

“Please wake up… please, I-I’m sorry, I-” She paused for a moment, her face slowly twisting in anguish, before she hugged Gregory close to her and fell to her knees. “Please… please, no, you can’t be… please… come back!” Vanessa begged. She closed her eyes so tight that it hurt in an attempt to keep herself from breaking down completely. 

“Please don’t go… I’m sorry, please, please don’t go!” She hugged him tighter as she begged, even though she knew he was already gone.

“No, please… no… no no no no…” She couldn’t hold it in any longer. She broke down, sobbing loudly as a river of tears flowed from her face. She tossed her head back and wailed at the top of her lungs, crying uncontrollably. “NOOO-”

“Vanessa!” 

Vanessa’s eyes snapped open and she sat bolt upright in her bed, gasping in shock. Her face was wet with tears, causing strands of her hair to stick to her face. Her breathing was heavy and panicked as her eyes darted around the room, struggling to focus. When her vision was finally able to focus, she could see Gregory standing beside her bed, next to him was a remote control Freddy doll that was given to Freddy so that he and Gregory could keep in touch after he left the Pizzaplex. The lamp by her bedside had been turned on, casting a warm glow throughout the room.

Vanessa stared blankly at them for a moment, still trying to catch her breath.

“Are you alright, Vanessa?” Freddy asked. Although the doll’s face remained expressionless, Freddy’s voice was filled with concern as he stepped closer to Vanessa.

“Yeah, you okay? We heard you screaming from my room,” Gregory yawned. “You even woke me up, and I’m a pretty heavy sleeper.”

Vanessa looked around once again, scanning the room, reassuring herself that everything was okay. It had just been a nightmare. She was at home, far away from the Pizzaplex. Vanny was gone. Gregory was safe. She was safe. 

Vanessa breathed a shaky sigh of relief as she wiped the tears from her face. She looked back towards Gregory and Freddy, feeling slightly guilty.

“Yeah, I… I-I’m fine. Just… just a dumb nightmare… i-it’s fine.” She said, taking a deep breath while wiping more tears from her eyes.

“It didn’t sound fine…” Gregory replied, not convinced.

“I have to agree with Gregory. It sounded like a bad nightmare. Would you like to talk about it?” Freddy inquired, tilting his head slightly and awaiting a response.

Vanessa froze for a second, her heart starting to beat faster, the sound of Vanny’s laughter echoing in her memory as she thought back on her nightmare. She quickly shook her head, as if trying to make the memories disappear, before looking back towards Freddy and Gregory.

“NO, no… i-it’s alright, really.” She took a deep breath and sighed. “Look, I-I’m sorry I woke you up. I’ll… try to be quieter.”

“That’s not the problem here, Vanessa…” Gregory grumbled, just barely loud enough for Vanessa to hear him.

“I’m fine, Gregory, really. Please, just go back to bed.” Vanessa closed her eyes and put her hands on her head, trying to keep herself calm.

“Yeah, there’s no way in hell I’m leaving you like this-”

“Gregory! Language!” Freddy interjected in a disapproving tone. 

Gregory rolled his eyes and continued, “Look, it’s obvious that there was something really bad about this one. Maybe if you tell us what happened, it will help.”

After a moment or two of complete silence, Vanessa sighed and relented.

“Alright, fine.” After a brief moment of hesitation, she took a deep breath and tried to explain. “It… it was about… THAT night… at the Pizzaplex…”  She glanced over at Gregory. “You know the one.”

Gregory nodded in agreement, then waited for Vanessa to continue.

“But this time SHE… She got to you… after you finished the game…”

Gregory’s eyes widened in shock. He stared blankly at Vanessa as she began to break down, struggling to continue and trying her best to hold back tears, her voice breaking from the stress.

“And I… I-I tried to… I-I tried to save you but… there just wasn’t anything I could do and… and…” Vanessa held her head in her hands, covering her face. 

Her voice was barely above a whisper as she continued, eyes filled with tears. “You… y-you died in my arms…” She couldn’t hold it back anymore and burst into tears, unable to speak.

Gregory and Freddy looked at each other, unsure of what to do at first. Then, Gregory turned back towards Vanessa, clambered up onto the bed, and gave her the biggest hug he could. 

Vanessa gasped softly and froze, startled at first. A feeling of dread filled her chest as her breathing became faster and she could hear her heartbeat pounding in her ears like thunder in a lightning storm. She remained frozen in place, even though every thought racing through her head was screaming at her to get Gregory away, to get him somewhere safe and away from HER.

After a moment, Vanessa noticed that something was different. Gregory’s heartbeat wasn’t slowing down, his blood wasn’t soaking through her clothing, and he was still breathing. He wasn’t dying. Gregory was fine. She could hardly remember the last time something like this had happened.

Hesitantly, she started to close her arms around Gregory. As she fully reciprocated the hug, Vanessa felt her panic start to dissipate and a rush of emotions came crashing down on her. She hugged him tightly, holding onto him like he was a lifeline, grounding her to reality. Everything was fine. She was fine. She wasn’t a monster. She wasn’t Vanny.

“Everything’s okay. We’re both safe, see? Nothing bad is going to happen. I promise.” Gregory reassured Vanessa while hugging her tightly as she cried, giving her the time to let her feelings out. Freddy joined in on the hug, clumsily crawling up onto the bed and gently hugging Vanessa. After a few minutes, Vanessa managed to calm down, her crying reduced to quiet sniffling. Gregory and Freddy stopped hugging Vanessa, backing up to give her some space.

“Are you feeling better now, Vanessa?” Freddy asked. Vanessa nodded as she wiped the remaining tears from her face.

“Yeah…” Vanessa smiled slightly, her voice quiet and calm. “Thank you, I really needed that.”

“Hey, no problem! You needed help. We weren’t just going to leave you like that.” Gregory replied, smiling at Vanessa.

“Hey, can… can you guys stay with me for the night? Please? I just… I don’t really want to be alone right now… if that's okay…” Vanessa said hesitantly. 

Freddy and Gregory looked at each other, thought for a second, then nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, sure! It’s fine with me.” Gregory answered.

“Yes, it will be like having a sleepover!” Freddy stated enthusiastically. Gregory and Vanessa chuckled at his response. 

Vanessa scooted over and lifted the blanket, allowing Gregory and Freddy to get under the covers. They stayed up and talked for a little while, mostly discussing what they wanted to do the next day. Slowly, one by one, they all started to fall asleep.

As Vanessa started to drift off to sleep, she looked over at Gregory. She gently brushed his hair out of his face and carefully pulled the covers up and tucked him in for the night.

“Thank you, my little knight… Sleep well.” Vanessa whispered, trying not to wake him up. She smiled, taking a deep breath before reaching over, turning off the light, and closing her eyes. She breathed a sigh of relief as she finally fell asleep, her mind clear of nightmares for the first time in a long time.

[pain-is-my-game]

I love how parents deny small acts of kindness from us in order to teach "responsibility" but we're still expected to show them those same acts of kindness because if we don't it's considered selfish and uncaring.

[venusandsaturnsrings]

UGH ANGEL GF WITH MEANER TARU!!

Inceltaru who wants you to only talk to him! Only lok at HIM!! Imagine him seeing you interacting with a fellow angel </3 he's just so heart broken you would ever talk to someone else when he's right there!! You have to be punished for talking to someone else <33 him messing with the base of your wigs till your sobbing, ofc he just adores you but he's still has to teach you a lesson:(( or maybe he get you a costume collar with his name on it so everyone knows your his<33 maybe even something more permanent as carving his initials into your skin<33 just think of how disgusted all the other angels would be when they find out that your mats is a human and what you're letting him do to you :(( you might even be banished from the hevanly realm </33 but who care if that means more time with your precious taru even if he was so mean earlier! Humans have such a funny way of showing others that someone has a mate after all<33

-chubby darling anon who is not doing this out of force but bcs I'm silly and love my nasty little guy

bait placed and effectively grabbed YIPPEEEE my excuse to ramble abt inceltaru punishments is here!! it’s arrived!! thanks to you!! <3

cw: for blood, knifeplay, incel themes, abuse, and manipulation <3

when it comes to his adorable little angel, Ajax is… selfish to put it lightly. you’re his angel are you not? so why bother gracing others with so much as your gaze; it makes no sense to him. he does his best to drill a firm set of rules into your head but with such a sweet disposition you naturally slip up on occasion under the preface of helping others. Ajax can’t exactly blame you for it, by all means you’re a species designed to aid others, but it still builds an ugly ball of jealous in his gut and mind.

when it comes to punishments, he doesn’t frame them for what they are. he’d rather go about it explaining it as something normal that all humans do!! you would hate to be left out, right? he mumbled sweet yet backhanded praises while gently tracing your throat before fastening the collar around it. a little bit of, “this is what’s supposed to happen,” and a dash of, “c’mon pretty girl, you want to be good don’t you? so quit fussing and let me fix this up.” he’s sweet when he gently cuts his initials into you too. hands smoothing all over your plush skin and trailing kisses wherever his mouth leads him as if it’ll soothe the bite of the blade digging into your flesh. he wipes your tears off and assures you this is what humans do to show affection and ownership!! everyone does it so behave!! with that, you do even if you’re squirming and sobbing the whole time.

when the other angels see what you’ve let him do? oh, they’re horrified. you let him mangle you so eagerly without a word of defiance? rather than ostracizing you immediately, they attempt to save and help you, urging you to leave this foul human and never let him near you again!! yet, you can’t. you just love him so much that when you come back teary eyed and explaining how they want you to abandon him, Ajax his wrapped around you in seconds. he sighs and mutters about how they just don’t understand the way you do. you’re just naturally better than all of them, you get him. he’s a wonderful gaslighter!!

-☆★☆-

i’m the canon universe he’s far less subdued with punishments. there’s no need for him to beat around the bush so hard since you already know the type of guy he is; a ruthless harbinger with inclinations towards distraction and a major desire for power. he doesn’t need to manipulate the situation so hard because there’s nothing to be manipulated. it’s easy math to him, one plus one is two and you did something bad so you’re getting punished. makes sense, no?

he’s a bit traditional when it comes to these sorts of things. his first line of defence is laughing it off when murderous intent in his eyes and a firm pat to your head that clearly says ‘don’t push your luck’. if that isn’t effective, then prepare for a harsh talking to that’s full of degradation and a bruising grip on your wrists. following that it gets more… humiliating. forcing you to address him as ‘sir’ in public, making you get off on his shoe in front of new recruits, spanking you in Zhongli’s office, and so on… anything above belongs in the category of you fucked up but to a lesser degree. things like back talk, finding work arounds to the rules hes laid out, or not listening to extra orders he’s given to you. he can get far meaner if the situation calls for it.

lets say you did something to make him look a fool in front of his coworkers, god forbid the other harbingers, regardless of if it’s on purpose or not. he’ll be brandishing a small hydro blade and lurking where you least expect him. sometimes it’s in an alley way and sometimes it’s in the darkness of your shared home. you’ll be lulled into false security after he brushes it off in the moment and doesn’t immediately act on punishing you. it’s only when all you’re muscles have relaxed that Ajax slinks out of his hiding spot and presses the blade to your throat just enough to draw blood but not enough to do any serious damage. he’ll revel in the way you sob and cry as with practices precision he makes clean and almost artistic cuts across you’re whole body. Ajax is careful not to draw enough blood to actually put your health at risk but sometimes he gets close; he just adores the deep wine colour especially when it’s coming from your body. numerous degrading terms and many slices of his name will cover your head to toe by the time he’s done making you suffer. it’ll be impossible for you to move without serious discomfort so he’s quick with gliding his cock through the trails of your blood before spreading your pussy open for him to use. it’s close enough to being lube, surely!! any complaints will only make him rougher so be good from there on out. <3

[fictionkinfessions]

People misunderstand me so often, I saw a video recommended to me of a therapist analyzing canon-me and felt almost sick. Like, yeah, sure, maybe he's actually going to pay attention to things like the concept of everyone else except my brother knowing, or "hey, Father LIED TO ME FOR LIKE TWO THOUSAND YEARS and then when I confronted him basically told me he intended to use me as a political pawn and that I had failed at even that", or any number of other traumatic events. Or he's going to go into the psychology of manipulation and just focus on all the bad things that I did rather than any of the bad things that happened to me.

And what makes it worse is that I don't think canon acknowledges most of my childhood. It portrays Father as if he was some magnanimous parent who tried to raise both of his sons to become kings (something we both knew was impossible, and pretty early on, I stopped really wanting it as long as my brother still saw me as his equal). It leaves out the part where he went easy on the people who wanted me kept in a cage, on a leash, muzzled, who wanted to put me down like a rabid dog. It probably doesn't portray the children who threw stones at my back. I haven't watched all of it, but if it was going to, the first movie was where to put that stuff.

Sure, I did bad shit. I was a villain for a while, I won't deny it. But that doesn't mean I was evil to my core. But why would anyone give me a fair shake. I was a god, and this universe's version of the relevant faith has had issues with demonizing this universe's parallel to who I was unfairly, to the point even supposedly good and accepting groups don't accept people who worship them. Or didn't, I know at least one changed their rules, but having had that rule at all and only having removed it when some people were revealed to have been hiding that they broke it because it was unfair doesn't really reflect well on them.

Perhaps no Loki will ever get a fair chance at anything. And it's sad that I'm afraid to watch videos about myself because of that. I changed. I grew. I want to see people understand me, at least canon!me, because even there, where so much context just doesn't exist because they wanted to spend time getting my brother a girlfriend (who, to be fair, is perfectly lovely, though he didn't date her in my timeline and a half, long story, anyone who knows anything about Marvel's timeline fuckery will vaguely understand, but she did put up with him when he acted like he had no concept that manners are cultural and he was within a different culture), there is depth most people miss because they just want to hate the villain. Sometimes, I almost wish I could be the villain they think I am. Because at least then, it wouldn't hurt so much.

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