#cuz i’m an introvert and don’t talk to anyone

[the--last-great-american-dynasty]

apparently we’re supposed to introduce ourselves on this thing so

hi

my name is elise rebekah 👋

i’m a 19 year old nursing student. my pronouns are she/her (i’m good with they/them too) and i’m a lesbian (Andrew Garfield is my exception). i probably have adhd but i’m a 19 year old woman who’s gotten straight A’s her whole life so i don’t have a diagnosis. besides, who has time to go to therapy? (that’s a joke, please go to therapy)

i’m honestly pretty boring so idk really what to put. i am good at making lists though, so imma just do that.

LIKES:

the colors pink and purple

reading

pastel interior design

cozy cottages in the woods

daydreaming

wishing i had magic powers

both dogs and cats

chocolate and coffee

doing cool lab experiments

thai and vietnamese food

the 2005 Pride & Prejudice movie

pretty flowers

women

converse

cult documentaries

colorful pens

biology and anatomy

musicals

fashion analysis videos despite the fact that I know nothing about fashion

going on walks

those gold ornate vintage mirrors

pretty pictures

daydreaming again (it’s how i spend most of my time)

FANDOMS:

stranger things

pjo and hoo

harry potter (but NOT jkr)

dead boy detectives

heartstopper

legendborn

bridgerton

loads more but my brain doesn’t work rn

FAV SHIPS:

byler (will byers x mike wheeler)

jancy (jonathan byers x nancy wheeler)

percabeth (percy jackson x annabeth chase)

lumax (lucas sinclair x max mayfield)

steddie (steve harrington x eddie munson)

wolfstar (sirius black x remus lupin)

payneland (edwin payne x charles rowland)

also loads more but my brain still isn’t working

MUSICIANS:

noah kahan (fav song: part of me)

taylor swift (fav song: the prophecy)

chappell roan (fav song: california)

hozier (fav song: talk)

grace power (fav song: water worship pray)

dove cameron (fav song: sand)

conan gray (fav song: people watching)

MUSICALS:

hamilton

wicked

dear evan hansen

six

les miserables

in the heights

the greatest showman

newsies

tick, tick, boom (shout out to andrew garfield, loml)

BOOKS:

pjo and hoo

emily wilde’s encylopedia of faeries

legendborn

acotar

the cruel prince

the house in the cerulean sea

cultish: the language of fanaticism

the inheritance games

a hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy

six of crows

the hunger games

paula

bridgerton

there’s a million more books i could put here

also my tbr list is ridiculously long

MOVIES & SHOWS:

the 2005 pride and prejudice

knives out (my comfort movie!!!)

greta gerwig’s little women

stranger things

dead boy detectives

anne with an e

derry girls (my comfort show!!!)

brooklyn 99

new girl

heartstopper

bridgerton

red notice

oceans 8 (and oceans 11)

do revenge

wine country

wednesday

my lady jane

abbot elementary

tick, tick, boom!

marvel movies

the hunger games

in the heights

i could go on forever

i’m a college student, work in the ER, am an introvert, and am chronically online, which means i have no life and am perpetually single.

guess that’s about it

you should follow me, it makes me feel good about myself

XOXO

your friendly neighborhood lesbian

elise rebekah

[obxsprincess]

I’m going crazy

Absolutely losing it over the idea of Miguel being a piano instructor very cocky about being the greatest one out there too, plus his clients are usually rich cuz not anyone can afford

And like just BARE WITH ME

This one rich family hires him for their shy daughter who is just introverted and sheltered AF she’s just so sweet so anxious so goddamn quiet with round eyes (somewhere between 20-25) 🎀🧸 typa girlie.

Everyone can guess the rest right? 🥺 shy girlie drooling over her older instructor mentally; but never flirts back until one day he tries a physical approach WHILE TEACHING HER saying something about new methods.

And she doesn’t retreat nodding her head to everything with an occasional low “yes.” so just he progresses further… telling her to focus on the musical notes while pulling her on his lap. Her back pressed to his chest.

Miguel is soooo mean, bullying her into making some noise because all she has done is play the wrong notes and trembling in his arms while his hands roam under her clothes her skirt and everything…

( I’m sorry needed to talk to someone about this brain rot of mine. 😭 your tumbler gave me the vibe that YOU would understand.)

YES yes yes this made me FERAL omgieeee !! as a 🎀🧸 girlie I-I I need this (∩˃o˂∩)♡

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

just imagine he’s all coy about it too — gliding his hands over your bare thighs, rubbing idle circles. he’s knows your head is absolutely fuzzy :((

“too fucking tense sweet thing, necesitas relajarte princesa” (you need to relax) and of course the only thing you can do is nod dumbly

just like you mentioned — he prides himself on being the best… so of course he knows what he’s doing when his hands travel under your skirt, feeling you squeak on top of him. “need’ta help you loosen up princess. ya wanna feel good playing don’t you?” you both knew the answer 🥺. “Así es cariño. I’m the best instructor you’ll ever have, don’t you’ worry.” (that’s right, sweetheart)

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

[oracleact]

You can totally choose to look past this cuz it might be a lot (Tw trauma?) I just got Carried, you know when Carrie (from the movie) she gets a bucked full of blood over her head on prom? A guy asked me out and to my surprise, I was blessed with ketchup, eggs and flour by him and his friends, the subway didn’t let me in and no Uber would accept me getting in a car, so I had to walk home. No one asked me what was wrong

I’m still processing that actually happened,. I’m assuming it’s bc of my weight, I’m tall and overweight, I mainly keeps things to myself, am a introvert, idk what other thing could be a reason besides my body. Could you please write a comfort scenario with the tmnt boys? Or one of them, you can choose, Could be platonic, romantic, idk, just reader (who’s usually friendly but don’t talk much about their romantic life cuz they don’t feel like it’s worth investing time, and when they finally decide to change that, thst happens) crying as a mess in front of them for the first time, saying they are tired of living in a body that feels more of a curse than anything,

It’s a lot, I know, you can delete this if you aren’t comfortable doing it (I’m 100% serious)

Thank you Eitherway and hope you have a good day

first of all, I’m so sorry that happened to you. back in high school, I was doused after classes so I can definitely understand your pain here. they are absolutely pathetic for even thinking about doing that to someone; they are total assholes because they acted on it too and I wish for it to haunt them one day when (or if) they mature. you did amazing on your way home that day - I hope that, with time, things will get better for you. you deserve great things. I haven’t written anything with all of the boys before but I wanted to give it a try for you to cheer you up. I wish you well, and I hope you can find comfort in our wonderful turtles!

« got your back »

tmnt x reader / angst + fluff

notes: 1.6k words, all turtles included, platonic relationship, gender neutral reader (no pronouns used,) first person pov, I was thinking of 2012 tmnt while writing this but it probably fits with most iterations.

I can’t believe I’m walking home in the dark, completely covered in miscellaneous goop. I’m glad I didn’t tell anyone about the date that was supposed to happen tonight because, if someone saw me right now, I don’t know what I would do. no public transport let me on covered in eggs and flour, the same for taxis, so now I’m stuck dragging myself home by my own two feet. they are awfully heavy despite my hurry to get back which doesn’t seem fair at all - it’s like my body is laughing at me in equal measure to the rest of the crowd back there.

put your head down and keep walking, put your head down and keep walking, put your—

“hey guys, look!” I stop in my tracks as soon as I hear that voice echo through the night sky. it sounded too much like mikey to simply ignore it.

“mikey, for the last time, shh! ninjas, remember?” that was definitely leo. they all must be up on a roof somewhere but I don’t dare to look up. my feet won’t move anymore regardless, they’re refusing to pick up and run. my body really does hate me tonight huh?

“mikey is right though, look down - hey there!” I slowly crane my neck towards the sound of their chatters and am met with possibly the worst sight I could see at this exact moment: all four of my mutant friends standing on a nearby roof, just as I suspected.

“hi everyone,” I give an awkward wave as they stare down at me.

“want to meet up at the entrance to the lair to hang? we’re just heading back,” raph calls out.

I need a plan, and fast.

thankfully, they can’t see that I’m covered in mush from where they are, but if I go to the lair then that will change. however, if I say ‘no’ to hanging out with them then they’ll get suspicious anyway and follow after me. they’re my best friends, my favourite thing in the whole world is hanging out with them. even if I genuinely can’t hang out we still find a loophole to be together.

either of these choices leaves me doomed to talk about this disaster of a night eventually so…

“sure, you go ahead and I’ll be there in a second.”

…I go with option one.

I knew the boys would get there first so I’ve had more time to come up with some lame lie before I face them: one point to me. I slap on a brave face and a ridiculously wide smile in the hopes that it would distract them from what I have going on all over my clothes. taking a deep breath, I turn the final corner to enter the lair.

“hey bud!” mikey bursts through the rest of the guys and comes skipping towards me. I freeze and simply wait for him to see me in the light. “woah, what happened to you?”

after hearing mikey’s question, everyone starts to crowd in around me, thinking I had been hurt or something on the way here. to their surprise, I have no cuts or scrapes…just a bunch of different types of produce in my hair. they begin to mutter more questions but my mind is too hazy to hear them clearly, opting to stand there and stare into the space behind them. leo notices me zoning out pretty quickly and leads me to the seating area in the middle of the lair by my arm, the rest of the boys following with worry in their eyes.

I sit down on the couch; raph bends down in front of me, donnie sits on my right, mikey hangs over the back of the couch to lean on my left, and leo rests his hands on my shoulders from behind me.

“who did this to you? I’ll kill them, I’ll punch them into the ground I swear to god—“

“raph, calm down. we need to know what happened first before we start going haywire.” I’ve never seen donnie look so aggravated before. it looks like he secretly wants to join in with raph’s immediate anger instead of acting ‘rationally’ this time.

“no need for punching anyone or anything ha! I— uh— tripped while I was walking home and fell straight into a pile of garbage surrounding a dumpster. how clumsy of me ha! I’m so silly. I wasn’t watching where I was going and it was dark so…” my words trail off as I finally look directly at my friends. none of them are believing this story at all.

“tell us the truth, it’s alright. you’re safe here.” leo speaks with such a warm tone, it makes holding back my tears even harder than it already was.

“I’m fine! I promise I’m fine, really I just tripped!” I force my lips into a thin line, trying to twist them into some kind of smile, until mikey pokes at my cheek. I turn to him.

“please tell us what’s wrong.” is he giving me puppy eyes? damn it mikey…

I couldn’t push back my tears any longer and the flood gates exploded. I was in hysterics, sobbing so loudly it bounced off the walls of the lair. I couldn’t stop, each sob rippled through me and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. the boys cooed at me, all of them placing a hand somewhere on my body to ground me and to let me know that I’m not alone as I cried. they tried still asking me questions but I couldn’t get out any words, only heartbreaking whimpers left my mouth. they accepted their fate of silent sobs though and simply stayed beside me.

after a while, I’ve calmed down slightly, and I see the boys look at each other and nod in the corner of my blurry eyes. then, all of a sudden, raph and leo run off. they come back not long after with a basin of water, towels and some other things that I can’t quite see cradled in their large hands. my curiosity is answered in a split second though as the four begin to wipe away the dirt that covers me, still allowing me to ride out my cries in the meantime.

raph gets back into his bent position to gently clean my face, donnie and mikey clean down my arms, and leo starts to brush my hair the best that he can. it must be a brush that april keeps here at the lair, since I don’t think I’ve left one here before.

they continued like this - softly wiping and rinsing - until they were sure that they had done all they can do to rid me of this sticky mess, and until I was able to stabilise my breathing and speak somewhat clearly again.

“april is going to be mad that you got ketchup on her hairbrush,” I say lowly between hiccups. leo laughs and assures me that the brush is perfectly fine; no need to worry.

it is silent (apart from the sound of my sniffling) while they put down their tools and clear them away from the couch, until donnie speaks, “we don’t want to push you to talk but we are here to listen if you want to.”

maybe it is finally time to talk about it. as much as I don’t want to, I think I need to. I’m always the one with a bright smile and cheery attitude but I need to let that go for now. I need comfort, and I need to admit that to myself - even if it’s for this singular moment.

I begin to explain the story of the date and how it went terribly wrong - just the vital details to build the story rather than adding my feelings about it. being vulnerable like this isn’t my strong point so I need to prepare myself to talk about that part with truth and from the heart.

I can see the pure rage in raph’s eyes as he sits in front of me, his teeth grinding together and a low growl coming out of him. he goes to say something but donnie stops him with a hand on his shoulder. he gives red a pat and he seems to understand what he is signalling, inhaling and exhaling with his eyes closed before fixing his posture to listen to me again.

“you know, I don’t know if I want raph to rough up him or rough up me at this point,” I let out a laugh to try and soften the atmosphere but the expressions of the boys tell me that it didn’t work. they look confused; sad. “a good rough up might fix whatever is wrong with me, because it’s obviously me. look at me! why else would he have made plans to humiliate me like that? what do I need to punch into shape - the way I look? the way I act?” I laugh again with the same intent as earlier despite knowing that it is going to do nothing to lessen the impact of my words.

“did he specifically make you feel like that?” raph says through gritted teeth, “that you’re not good enough?”

“no, I guess I’ve been feeling that way for a while. he just made it worse - a lot worse.” my eyes start to burn again with more tears. I’m surprised I’m not dehydrated yet.

mikey grabs my face in his hands, his eyes also look clouded with tears, “you are so beautiful. really, you are. I remember when I first saw you I was like ‘woah, they’re even prettier than the humans I see on tv!’ you don’t need to change anything about the way you look, I can tell you that for sure.”

“nor do you need to change anything about your personality or how you act,” donnie chimes in. “why do you think we like you so much? you’re awesome! you’re smart, kind, caring, plus you treat us like we’re golden and we’re literally in the sewers right now,” we all giggle at the last statement he makes.

leo pats me on the head, signally me to look up towards him, “you are the greatest friend we could have ever asked for, and if we need to remind you of that more then we will. you deserve to feel that you’re worthy and loved and I can tell you with certainty that you are when you’re here with us. there’s no need to hide from us, we’ve got you’re back.”

raph grabs my hand, “and seriously, if you want us to go and talk to that guy we will.”

“raph!” the others shout. I laugh at the slight panic hiding in their voices - it’s fully directed at their brother and his fists.

“what?! I said talk not bash into the ground so what do you want from me?!”

[winterwump]

Hi may i request gun smut? Maybe the scenario can be like, both of us are Yakuzas and we are in Japan, we hate each other sm however we end up on the same bed 🫦 love your writing <3

Tension - Gun x F!Reader

Author’s Notes: Thanks so much for requesting this Anon. I played it kind of fast and loose with smut. It’s definitely still smutty tho so don’t worry lol. This is a long one too so have fun with that. Sorry it took forever and a goddamned day to get this out, I swear that life hates me lol😝

Content Tags: Teasing, Fingering, and Enemies into Lovers (if you squint)

Word Count: 1.7k

It was the night before the month-long Yakuza summit, and you were beyond miserable. But you didn't start off like that by any means. You were excited about the summit, you got more money, the food was free and endless, and you weren’t expected to talk to anyone aside from the foot soldiers. It's not that you were underpaid, malnourished, or a complete introvert. You just like that the summit made everything easier for everyone regardless of rank, and you happened to be ranked rather high. And even with your ranking, your job had been simplified to ‘Stand still and look menacing. Wait for a fight’. And that was fine by you.

It was until you were informed by the Big Boss himself that there was a change in plans and that you were to closely accompany his son to the provided room and board…and stay with him for the duration of the summit. Now that wouldn’t be a huge problem in itself if the Boss’ son wasn’t well…himself. It’s not that you disliked Gun. Okay, that was a lie, you really couldn’t stand him in all honesty. He was a standoff-ish, money-hungry, sadistic pervert as far as you were concerned, and you spared no expense in telling about himself. But orders are orders, and you were pretty sure that Gun was also miserable with his placement as well.

It felt like you were on autopilot all day on the way to the summit location. The travel for the two of you went smoothly enough, but that was only because you two had an unspoken mutual agreement to not talk the entire way there. Which was mostly adhered to, except for when Gun got a call from Goo - his “friend who isn’t his friend but they do friend things” :

“Heyyy how’s the summit?!” - Rang Goo’s voice as soon as Gun picked up.

“I told you it’s not happening until tomorrow. Do you have a listening problem?” - Gun pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Oh yeaaa…whatever!! So is Y/N really your chaperone for the summit?!” - You tried not to roll your eyes at Goo’s attempt at whispering your name despite being on speaker.

“I’m hanging up now.” - Gun’s voice was heavy with exasperation.

“No wait!! Is she? cuz that’s fucking hilar-” and Gun ended the call with a huff.

And that was that. It was nightfall by the time you two actually made it to the room, and you were beyond ready to sleep. As per your job, you went in first to inspect the room and you weren’t surprised by the luxurious state of it, but you were surprised (if not struck with a wave of annoyance) by the single king-sized bed smack dab in the middle of the room. Your mouth hung open in a comical display of disbelief, but that was cut short by Gun all but pushing you out of the doorway to get in. Ugh…

“Close the door. And don’t give me any shit about the room tonight.” - Came Gun’s voice as he made his way to the dresser, setting his bag down. Of course, it was a designer brand…

“You think I like this setup either?!” - You ask with some bite to your voice as you slammed the door closed. Your annoyance was starting to rear its head.

With his belongings settled, Gun made himself busy with a new cigarette. You could’ve sworn it was his 10th one today…

“Ughh will you put that out? You can smoke in the morning. You need to be well-rested for the summit!” - You say, sauntering towards him with your hand held out. Your motion was something akin to what a teacher does when a student is chewing gum in class. The look he gave you in response said it all…

Yeaaaa that didn’t work out, and one verbal altercation later, the room reeks of ‘high-quality’ cigarettes. You decided to yield and let him smoke himself to sleep because you knew that you’d go to jail if he caught an attitude with you again. You knew that feeling went both ways at least.

Both of you were stalling. You both busied yourself with baths (separately) and once that was over, Gun busied himself with a nighttime skin routine that you didn’t know he had. And you busied yourself with checking all of your weaponry. Both doing everything but getting in that bed. But fuck, both of you were tired.

To your surprise, Gun caved first and got in the bed. Well, it wouldn’t be caving if he did it without acknowledging the awkwardness in the air? Either way, you’re no bitch, you’re not gonna let him just have the bed to himself. So in your spite-fueled pep talk, you plop yourself down on the opposite side of the bed.

“You stay on your side, and I stay on mine. Got it?!” - You said with a venom-laced huff. God, the bed felt like heaven.

Gun let out a pained groan - “Jesus, you got it. Would you ease up though? I’m not going to touch you.”

“You wouldn’t dare, you know better than that.” - Your tone was playful, but still had a spiteful edge.

“I should be saying that to you don’t you think? You can touch me. Wouldn’t want to lose your job, now wouldn’t yo-“

His words were cut off by the swift motion of you pinning him down onto the bed's plush surface. It was not the first time you had him pinned, but doing it sparsely dressed was a first. You wouldn’t let that detail sink, because even though the room was dark, you could tell he had a shit-eating grin.

“I hit a nerve. Cute. Now get off me before we do something we’ll regret” - The grin was still there.

“Something we’ll regret? You wanted something to happen didn’t you?!” - You half-whispered. 

“Something like that…”

You had Gun’s lower half trapped between your legs, and your ass rested against his pelvis. Of course, something was bound to happen. So you decided to let it happen. What could go wrong? You leaned down face to face with Gun, grinding yourself down on him:

“Let’s rack up some regrets then” 

That was all Gun needed to hear because before you could really register what was happening, it was you who was pinned to the mattress. You couldn’t help but let out a gasp when you felt his tongue travel up the side of your neck. Just his breathing alone was getting you wet and tingly. The heat was already beginning to be too much.

“Already wet for me?” - Such an obvious question, but it was one meant to get you even more flustered. 

Deciding that you wouldn’t let him get the best of you, for now at least, you responded with a kiss. A fervent and passionate kiss. One that you hoped would shut Gun up, but you were wrong:

“I’ll take that as a yes” - He said in between kisses.

Despite Gun’s few words, they were getting you wetter and wetter. You didn’t respond verbally - but Gun knew how much he was affecting you, and he felt it too. The grinding of bodies would soon not be enough for either of you so you weren't too surprised when Gun hoisted both your legs up in a hurried manner, taking your panties off along with that motion.

The room was so dark that parts of Gun’s face were obscured, but you wanted him to look at you, so badly. It was killing you not knowing what his expression was, so when he leaned down to whisper in your ear:

“I’m about to get you off.” - You knew what that meant. How could you not?

A grin was plastered on your face as he brought his hand between your legs, you hoped that the teasing wouldn't go for too long, you were too wound up. But you couldn’t help but feel that his teasing was not without reason, but all you could do is trust that he knew how much you wanted to let go of the tension that was coiled so tightly inside of you

After properly getting his fingers lubricated from your generous flow of liquids, Gun slides two fingers inside of you. The intrusion was a welcome one and thus didn’t cause any pain, it instead left you with waves of pleasure as he began massaging your inner walls at a languid pace. You could feel your breath quickening and your heart beginning to race. You wanted Gun. For the first time, you felt like you could actually tolerate - no, like him. But that could just be your pussy talking. You wouldn’t know…

His fingers began moving at a faster pace inside of you the feeling left you spasming inside and out. With every one of his movements, the pressure kept building, and Gun was taking far too much pleasure in your unravelling. You bit your lower lip and let your head hang down as you focused on the feeling. You started moaning a little and, unable to control yourself, you let out a soft whimper. He was definitely playing with you right now - he was always playing with you and there was absolutely nothing you could do about it.

You began moaning louder and louder. Your body began to shake as your hips rocked and a rush of wetness began to soak the sheets below you, as well as Gun’s hand and forearm. You never knew you could squirt, but here you are. He was manipulating your pleasure and, for once, you didn’t mind at all.

“Ah!” - You felt your body explode and, within a few seconds, you were coming hard. As your orgasm took over, you let out a rather loud sobbing breath. Your body was still shaking and you found yourself not caring if Gun, or anyone for that matter, heard cry out in ecstasy. But when your orgasm finally lulled and your head stopped swimming, you heard yourself whine at the newfound emptiness you were feeling.

Gun had taken his fingers out, and you were crushed. But seemed as if he was elated if not extremely amused by the show you put on for him. In an attempt to soothe your growing concern, Gun simply encapsulated you in his arms. You never thought you would be in this position, but damn did it feel nice.

“We got the rest of the month to keep racking up regrets, Y/N” - He whispered - “Next time it won’t be my fingers”.

Hope y’all enjoyed this one. BYE!!!

[whumpy-wyrms]

are you okay?? what happened?

went to a party for the first time last night (senior party, we graduated and wanted to celebrate), drank for the first time, got drunk, crazy stuff happened. it was genuinely super fun though!! i knew everyone there since they were from my school so i was definitely safe the whole time, and i had a ride home.

ALSO (for context: i’ve always been the most quiet anti social kid at my school who literally never talks or gets involved in anything, just likes to draw and write and be an introvert. people have never bothered me about it either since i’ve always been like that and they all kinda respect it.) anyway the second i showed up at the party everyone in the room literally CHEERED because i was the one person they LEAST expected to be there it was awesome

i think i just liked having like no social anxiety and was able to interact with people really easy and stuff haha. like at one point i literally started rolling around in the grass and staring at the sky while giggling like a maniac it was awesome. everyone was calling me jay too which was so cool guys!!!! (for context i live in a very small conservative rural town which makes it very surprising that there aren’t that many transphobes) like i hardly talk to anyone in my grade but they’re all super supportive of me anyway and i genuinely felt so happy about that. like wooww these people can be assholes sometimes but they respect me and i’m gonna miss them

eventually everyone was kinda grouped at the front of the house and i went to check what was going on and there was a guy in a vest and the second i realized he was a cop i just ran to the backyard and followed like three other people out of there. we ran around town and eventually just sat in a field and waited for a ride it was crazyyy

i did get a ride home (not the one i originally planned lol) and everything turned out fine. i don’t think anyone got charged either (we all were underage drinking lol) so yeah. i also left my ipad there (brought it cuz i didn’t really know what to expect from the party and thought id go on it when i got bored lmao. i went on it once because i wanted to draw anton but gave up after like two doodles because drawing while drunk was literally impossible hahahha i’ll post the doodles when i get my ipad later though). anyways i feel completely fine now i just really wanna get my ipad back haha

[urlocalnonbinarybastardwrites]

oh my goodness :D hi hi hi!!!! i lit just found your blog and saw you do ships which is like soooo cute omgggg!!! soooo… i was wondering if i could get a match up too? 🤭

anywayyyysss, my name is Lalia! i’m 15 and turning 16 in september. I go by she/her and i’m pansexual. I am of south east asian and white descent (happy aapi month wooo!!!) here are some other physical attributes: 5’3ft tall and slim; i have short black hair (but i’m gonna dye it red over the summer); i have big eyes that are dark brown; and i never go outside so im pretty pale😭

my personality on the other hand is not as easy to describe as my appearance… ive taken a lot of personality tests that often describe me as: introverted, listening, creative, logical, thoughtful, determined, daydreaming, and melancholic. i don’t think that my personality is good or bad; in fact, i think that i am a true neutral. I also feel things very deeply, which has led me to be in situations where my feelings get out of control causing something bad to happen (like me ending up in the hospital and psych ward💀). BUT IM OKAY!!! i have anxiety medication and go to therapy lollll. But even though i keep to myself, i still like to talk to people and do things like acting, singing, dancing, and just performing in general!!! i actually love love LOVE to sing and play my guitars sm<33 but some of my other hobbies include writing books or poetry by myself or reading and drawing :3 i do believe that i am confident/ bold but i also tend to be pretty shy around people i don’t know. maybe cuz in middle school i was bullied a lot??? 😭 but i feel like that experience helped me to gain a lot of empathy for people who don’t fit in either,, so i always try my best to always be kind and stick up for people!! But yeah, im really excited for summer cuz i hate school and i never try but i still get all A’s :D

ERM ANYWAYS… idk why im yapping sm SORRYYYYY and TYSM FOR DOING THIS i hope you have a good day/night!! <3

Happy aapi month! Also about being in the psych ward or the hospital, I just wanna let you know that it has a lot of really nasty stereotypes and people who go to psych wards are honestly just cool because they care about their mental health and the fact that you found help and made yourself go or you know, even just didn’t refuse to go I’m really proud of you because it means that you’re taking care of the beautiful person that you are so Never be ashamed or let anyone call you crazy for any up in a psych ward or hospital because it just means that you were prioritizing you and for that it just means that you are very self-aware and I love you Pookie. I love you for prioritizing your mental health. 

Your Outsiders Ship: Ponyboy Curtis!

Explanation: I think he loves your short black hair and your eyes and think that it’s adorable that you’re so pale from never going outside. I personally think that he’s more on the tan side because I think he spends a lot of time outside but I think the contrast between you guys would be pretty hilarious. you seem like the type of girl that he would be very interested in in the fact that you are very thoughtful. Kind of more quiet. I think that you remind him of kind of a more academically based or you know deep thinking Johnny like that’s kind of the vibes I’m getting from you and I think that he would absolutely be in love with that. He usually take things from a logical standpoint and less emotionally so he would absolutely get that and I feel like you guys would have really deep meaningful productive conversations with each other that are interesting. Like I feel like you guys could be putting in room and you would never get bored of talking to each other because you would just be so invested in your conversation and you guys would have pretty good banter too. He also feels things incredibly deeply so I feel like you know he’s the most “” sensitive greaser so I think he would really get that and kind of you guys would get each other away that really no one else in the time period Can understand. He loves it when you sing and dance and thinks it’s pretty amusing he would definitely go to all of your shows and you really loudly or at least really loudly and I feel like he would be so proud afterwards and walk you home with the biggest grin on his face and he would also help you with acting. I don’t know why but I think he’s a surprisingly good actor. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s pretty good at character and analysis but I think that he’s a great actor and could help you out with your performances. He’s also into reading drawing and writing so I feel like that’s something that you guys could do together something kind of cute like you guys can make a little comic together or something like that and reading and music dates. You would absolutely have a lot of. he’s kind of similar in the fact where he doesn’t really love school, but he does get all A’s because he doesn’t want to disappoint his brother anyway you guys are cute and honestly, I didn’t have to think very hard about this because you guys are so similar, and I think you guys would be great for each other, you guys also have a habit of both always always standing up for the underdog and things like that so I think you guys could relate in that aspect of having similar kind of morals and values. 💚💚

[run-on-lightning]

Polykessoku Headcanons

look man, this is just me dumping my favorite tropes on Kessoku Band because i don’t have the strength or energy to write a proper fic right now. your mileage may vary and read with care.

a few headcanons for s1 era:

Kita-chan was already aware of Bocchi since the start of the school year, way before she found out Bocchi plays guitar, her curiosity slowly burning until Bocchi’s attempt to talk to her broke the ice.

Nijika and Ryo have an on-and-off-romantic-chicken thing going on in the background for years, where they’ll flirt (or react as if being flirted with) but the first one who gives in and kisses the other loses.

the following stuff is way down the line, where Kessoku Band is more established and our girls have known each other for much much longer:

Nijika is the first one who realizes she has feelings for multiple people, when she realizes she likes Bocchi and Kita-chan, on top of whatever she has going with Ryo. She’s also the first one who brings up her feelings for their bandmates with Ryo, and Ryo’s pretty chill cuz the two of them were never official nor exclusive and Nijika’s well aware of the random flings and what-not Ryo finds herself in. (also, imagine these two going on research binges when they first started exploring the idea of polyamory. Nijika is a smart hardworker and Ryo hyperfocuses.)

Kita-chan has never heard of polyamory and at one point she was heavily agonizing over her feelings for both Bocchi and Ryo. Once she musters up the courage to talk about it with a separate party, she brings it up with Nijika, who is like “You don’t have to choose between them.” and introduces Kita-chan to a whole new world.

At some point, the three of them (Nijika, Ryo, Kita-chan) come to an agreement that they will not do anything that would make things official with anyone until they’re all sure how Bocchi feels (and they all hope Bocchi is also open to the idea of all of them dating each other). Romantic Chicken has expanded to Kita-chan lol. She’s torn between regret and elation because Ryo and Nijika are especially merciless when they tag team flirting with Kita-chan, but teaming with either of them to flirt with the other is a thrill and joy like no other.

Like Kita-chan, Bocchi has also never heard of polyamory and is actually deeply in denial of her feelings for any of them, dismissing her bandmates’s flirting and skinship as just something close friends do... or worse, as something bands do for fanservice (”band gals being pals”).

The denial dam breaks when at one of their major liveshows, Kita-chan pulls off an amazing improv solo to buy time for Bocchi to fix some technical issue before her guitar solo part. It was just like in their very first Cultural Festival performance, but on a grander scale. The guitar solo turned into something like a duet, with the two of them improvising riffs and fills between them. Bocchi is so overwhelmed with so many different feelings and they’re all directed at Kita-chan, so in a spur of the moment, she actually leans in and kisses Kita-chan as they ended the solo.

Of course, poor Kita-chan wasn’t expecting a kiss, so she froze for a few seconds and missed her cue to sing the next stanza. Good thing Ryo is fast on the uptake and sings a few lines as lead until Kita-chan could sing again and Ryo could go back to singing backup vocals.

(To Be Continued another time...)

ok i’m tired and i need to sleep, but please enjoy a few random headcanons regarding dates before i go:

Bocchi feels comfortable in silence with Ryo and would be very down to hang out one-on-one more, if she weren’t worried about getting scammed of her money because, well, Ryo being Ryo. Once she learns to manage her money better (and earns more of Bocchi’s trust), Ryo takes Bocchi some of the stores she normally visits alone, where they’ll browse and listen to the stuff they like and only occasionally chat (cuz, yknow, Team Introvert)

Nijika and Kita-chan’s dates are very normal (meet at station, brunch at a cafe, watch a movie, window shopping afterwards), and they like it that way. They have other partners for crazier stuff.

Kita-chan and Bocchi’s early dates are also very normal... or they try to be, but there’s always Something that neither of them expects and one of them has to bring the other back from the brink of whatever Bocchi Time-esque episode they find themselves in.

Nijika and Ryo’s dates can go anywhere from super normal and low key to wild and random. They bicker and joke around a lot but there’s always, always at least one moment where they both fall silent while standing/sitting next to each other, hand in hand, fingers interlocked tightly with each other. Then they would look at each other, feeling how much they mean to each other’s lives while their eyes are locked... until one of them can’t take it any longer and looks away or waves it off with a laugh because they’re both blushing so hard. They usually end the day sleeping over in one of their houses.

[dejadoodles-101]

✨INTRODUCTORY POST✨

Hey yall! I’m gonna go ahead and finally introduce myself on here since a lot of you don’t really know who I am. So allow me to introduce myself! 💕

☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡

🪷My real name is Rhiannon, but that’s not a very good name so just call me Deja :)) (I have other nicknames too such as Rhi, Rhia, Jade and etc)

🪐I am an Aries ♈️ My bday is March 27 and I’m currently 22 years young but turning 23 soon!

🍄My pronouns are she/her/hers

❤️My sexuality is heterosexual (straight) as of for right now. Having some thoughts about becoming bisexual

🪻Introvert (INFJ-T)

🎨I am an artist. I sketch, digitally draw and paint on canvases sometimes.

🇺🇸 I live somewhere in America.

☘️ I’m also Irish-American.

💜 My favorite color is purple, but I also love blue, green, pink, black, red, gold and silver. And other variants of those colors

🖤I am considered as a goth, emo, and scene person. I’m also an aesthetic kind of person. (I’m into a lot of things lmao)

🧁 I really like sweets~ <3 (and other foods too)

🌴 I love the warm weather

😎 I guess I’m also considered to be cool lol

☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡

What I’ll mostly be posting on here is art, memes, fanfics, incorrect quotes and etc. The fandoms I’m in are The Owl House, Amphibia, Helluva Boss, Inside Out, Futurama, Big Hero 6 and etc. Expect a ton of TOH and IO art cuz that’s what I’m really into right now lmao 😂

Here’s a list of other things I’m also into:

•Goth/emo/scene stuff

•Cosmology/astronomy

•Nature

•Plants

•Jewelry/crystals/rocks/gems and such

•Dream/weird core

•Witchy stuff

•Rock music as well as pop, heavy metal, punk, dubstep and etc

•Creepy things

•Aesthetic stuff

☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡

-Do I do art requests, commissions, trades or whatever? All of those are currently closed. I DO NOT do art commissions because I don’t have access to do any of that. I probably will open art requests at some point as well as trades, but I’m just SUPER busy with art that I still need to get done.

-Am I LGBTQ+ friendly? HELL YEAH 🏳️‍🌈⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ I am an ally and I don’t care if you’re bisexual, pan, lesbian, gay or whatever! Just be yourself and don’t give a shit abt what anyone else says!

-Can minors interact with me? That really depends on the age. I am an adult and still a stranger here so I think I really prefer if ppl around 16+ can talk to me. I’m just kinda uncomfortable with the fact that there are 13-14 year olds on here and I’m like 10 years over those ages. If you are under 16 and wanna be my friend, I guess I’m okay with that but please just remember that I am an adult and just please be careful :) I am a nice person though!

-Other socials? I have 2 Instagram accounts. One of them is MissBigHero6 (my private account; the username will be changing soon tho) and the other is DejaDoodles101 (my art account). I have a DeviantArt (DejaDoodles101). I also have a discord account and that is under the name of Ariezthetic.

☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡

-I am obsessed with a ton of characters such as Emperor Belos and The Collector (TOH), Loona and Verosika Mayday (Helluva Boss), Anxiety and Envy (Inside Out), and many more lmao. Btw I’m a HUGE Belos simp 🤭

-My favorite ships are Lumity, Raeda, Huntlow, Gustholomule, Veesha and Belrin (my OC Erin x Belos, (TOH) Joy x Sadness, Disgust x Anger and Anxiety x Ennui (Inside Out) Millie x Moxxie (Helluva Boss)

-I have a ton of OCs and I can’t wait for you guys to meet them! Both original characters and from shows and movies I watch!

☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡

Kinda running low on other things to say abt myself so I’ll probably just stop here for now. I’ll try to add more at some point!

Go ahead and follow me if you’d like! Def need more followers and friends on here cuz I’m such a loner lmao 😅 Also looking forward to meeting you all! 🩷

[spamgyu]

Yk I just had this thought and it’s really making me want to kms cuz I don’t have a KIM MINGYU for myself and if I’m suffering you have to suffer too (I love you)

Ok so we all know how mingyu is a total extrovert and he doesn’t have any problem socialising with basically anyone, making friends everywhere he goes and even keeping in touch with them INVITING THEM TO SVT’s concert😭. He exudes TOTAL golden retriever energy.

So imagine him with someone total opposite of his personality. Someone who’s a total introvert, doesn’t like talking that much, likes to keep it to themselves, also a little socially awkward, really calm and collected. Basically someone with black cat energy.

I’m crying cuz as an socially awkward introvert myself just thinking abt how even though sometimes they would have to compromise with e/o, Mingyu would totally be fine with it and he would encourage her to go out and have fun yk help her get out of her shell and just be the sweetest bf EVER!!

If her s/o wants to stay home and cuddle, no problem he’s on his way to order pizza and already picking out her fave movie but if they are out let’s say a party he’s there with her, keeping her close to him and just being happy when he sees her just having fun and if her s/o runs outta her social energy he’s ready to say goodbye to his friends and taking her home even if it’s only been 2-3 since the party started.

Overall he would just be the sweetest bf ever!!

Every girl deserves a Kim Mingyu for herself😭

Anyways that was really long but yeah now 👹SUFFER WITH ME👹

Love yaa🥰

JDEJFJE "if im suffering u have to suffer too" yeah okay that's valid.

Wow okay wow that sent me into a spiral hello??? I no longer want Mingyu.... I NEED Mingyu bc I might just kms. Sweet bf Mingyu who knows that after a social gathering you need time to decompress and let's you sit in silence and just brainrot on your phone. He gives you space, while you sit on the couch in your own world and he just comes over with glass of water and a throw blanket. Like it's his way of saying hey I'm still here but you do ur thing

I need to be put down, sedated, taken out.

[slugcats-and-ghosts]

Mm post time..

Introducing

The Neighbourhood Au

An au by me and my friend @zyekno involving all the scugs as though they were people with houses, jobs and silly clothes :))

And the iterators are like mayors or presidents and stuff idk-

I know this is like a lot of info but I like info dumping so if u read it all, thanks :D

Anyways scug lineup! And their houses i guess-

Including all 9 scugs (some designs which are partially based on the outfits from @zyekno’s fashion meme)

Gourmand, everyone’s dad: constantly hosts barbecues for the whole neighborhood, platonic marriage with Saint??? And they were roommates….

Saint the all knowing: loves History, archaeology and all other scholarly subjects, loves teaching the younger scugs about stuff

Inv/Enot/??? the billionaire and landlord: acts as a platonic sugar daddy to Nightcat lol, keeps offering to just give Arti her house for free but she’s stubborn

Nightcat the gamer: lives rent free in Enot’s mansion streaming and playing video games, comes with the full gamer package

Artificer #1 punk mom! Single mother of 2, struggles to pay rent but Hunter helps her out with groceries sometimes, employed by Five Pebbles

Hunter #2 momdad dadmom! Lives with Survivor and Monk and helps take care of them somewhat, Arti’s kids see Hunter as a second mom/dad/parent, employed by No Significant Harassment

Survivor and Monk! (Might redesign them in the future tbh) can’t decide if they’re kids/teens adopted by Hunter or young adults in need of help (if kids then they like to play tons of games and roleplay together :D)

Rivulet the extrovert: can make friends with anyone, will make friends with everyone, constantly has sleepovers with Spearmaster, might be crushing on Spearmaster but don’t tell! They have a shared treehouse in their backyards. Also really close friends with Moon (the mayor??)

Spearmaster the introvert: Very shy doesn’t talk much to others except for Riv, kinda tired all the time but still somehow really strong, also crushing on Riv but they’re both too oblivious to realize, friends with Seven Red Suns cuz ya, likes to bakes??

Anyways ya that’s all of em. Anyone’s welcome to like use this if they want and even like make up their own version of the au cuz it’d be cool to see what other people think so ya have fun :)

(Also I might colour the scugs eventually I’m just impatient and wanna post it now lol)

[awaitingfall]

07.23.24

135.3

Yay lost a pound! Definitely was mostly period water weight I was holding onto. But I’m sure the weekend snacking didn’t help. Still confident that I can reach my goal of 133 by Friday.

Might not have too much to do today at work, which is okay with me, especially after yesterday. We had some kid come in to shadow everyone and he was with me for the first hour and I was trying to make it as entertaining as possible for him since I was the only one out on the floor (everyone else was either in a meeting or on lunch), but it went fine.

I’m usually nervous when talking to strangers, but I’ve gotten over that in the past year and a half. I really can’t give a shit about what anyone thinks of me cuz in the end if they don’t care for who I am as a person then they’re not going to be part of my life anyways. You can’t try and make everyone like you, it’s too exhausting and not natural to have every single person you meet become your friend. And it’s better to be a little more outgoing anyways to help make the other person feel like they can be more open and comfortable around you. You’d think as an introvert you’d prefer being around quieter people, but the more people I was around that were loud and outgoing and were like an open book towards me, the more comfortable I became just being myself around others. Obviously I still prefer calm and quiet time by myself, but when I’m with others, I prefer more outgoing interactions.

Sorry I got off on a tangent there.

Hopefully the rest of the work week will go by quickly/smoothly and then this weekend we’re going on another picnic, but this time with my bf’s family since his grandma, aunt and uncle are up visiting from Puerto Rico. We wanted to go ring shopping too, so we’ll either do that before or after the picnic 💕

[stellas-starry-stories13]

Hello! I hope you’re having a great day , I’d like to be paired up with Genshin impact.

Please , don’t pair me with anyone that’s a teenager ….

I’m a 21 year old female who prefers being indoors rather then being outdoors , I’m more introverted , but whenever I’m with my friends , i just have a massive confidence boost .

I’m not usually the one who interacts with people , people interact with me when we first start a conversation and I usually just listen and perhaps give a few comments here and there.

While I am more than ready to pick a fight with anyone that tries to hurt my friends , I also chicken out . I’m fairly good at encouraging people and pep talks and advice . I’m loyal and smart , but I can also brag a bit and I’m not exactly a good teacher …

I also happen to not really smile a lot and have a resting bitch face so people naturally avoid me .

I’m sensitive to loud sounds and sometimes light whenever it happens to strike my eyes directly. ( though I think that’s natural)I’m sensitive to insults since I’ve received a lot of them growing up .

I tend to do origami and piano , sometimes I write purely indulgent fanfics I also do tennis sometimes . I’ll also go to the shopping mall with my friends but I usually don’t buy anything they have to buy me something since I’m too shy to actually nab a piece of clothing. I also like naps.

I can draw pretty well and I’ve managed to make like 400 origami flowers in a day ,( I’m surprised there isn’t a paper shortage….) I’m fairly good at straw weaving and prefer soft yarns when I do make a scarf. And my piano is good!

I prefer a s/o that’s honest, nice , and willing to display affection , it doesn’t have to be outside but affection is wanted for me.

I really don’t like a s/o that’s rude or teasing and distant .

Thanks for reading this! Have a nice Day/evening/Night!

` . < Genshin Impact No.1~! > . '

A/N: make sure not to look at the tags or youll spoil it by the x reader!!! hello anonie! Hope you're having a grea tday as well :) man, making this made me realize that genshin only has like... Seven men?! Right?? Am i forgetting someome.. Cuz doesnt liyue only have zhonglie and inazuma only have ayato? Someone correct me if im wrong but. Wow. Genshin has a shortage of men.

Anyway, for the grand reveal, I match you up with....

` . < Baizhu~! > . '

A/N: was debating between him and zhongli but i thinm baizhu would be more interested in the fact that you like to weave and do origami more than zhongli. Anyway, I hope you were satisfied with this! This might be a bit ooc, I don't know a ton about baizhu

Most of the time you guys hangout you guys probably just go on a walk or maybe on a picnic, something simple like that

Though if you guys ever go shopping he will probably buy you a bunch of stuff like yarn maybe it paper

He might even start weaving himself after hanging out with you

He admires your protective side and understands it when you chicken out

If youre ever defending him, he'll probably give you a pat on the head and say that he appreciates it but he can handle it and you don't need to get physical

At random times he'll pop up at you're place and show you something he learned from you like an origami flower or a sraw hat, hoping that you'll crack a smile

He's always there to comfort you if you ever get insulted and probably shoos the rude person off

I don't think he'd be the most affectionate person naturally but if you ask he will definitely give you as much affection as you need

[grimmwolf]

👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎

Dumping / Journaling / Ranting / Updates / Venting - Basically the whole lot XD ( May be updated )

Idk what to post anymore. I haven’t had any shifts cuz I’m an animal or whatever basically every single second of my life, or I’m depressed and I can’t express my animality how I want to, or I can’t tell the difference between any of them because I identify as all animals and whatever else, I can’t or have become tired of trying to pinpoint and label all of them. All I do is lay down most of the day because my back aches so bad that I can’t even sit normally, so I am unable to express myself physically even less nowadays. I’ve been so depressed as well that I don’t talk much anymore nowadays, I’ve lost the ability to socialize, I don’t know how to connect with anyone anymore, or I feel like I can’t because I feel so different from literally everyone and no one can truly understand me, even if I try to explain things, even if someone tells me they understand. I know they don’t. I feel so alone, like no one likes me, especially since I’m so strict with my dni rules. There’s little to no one left who I follow ( alterhumans ) because of it, which makes me feel even more alone, but at least I’m placing and keeping my boundaries, that’s gotta count for something, right? And me identifying as Gaia or Mother Nature or whatever doesn’t make my situation any better. What normal alterhuman identities as an actual god? The creator of all life? I don’t even know if anyone believes me, so it makes me keep to myself about it. I do believe it though, I feel it, isn’t that proof enough? I feel the pain of the Earth, the Universe, how can I prove that? By continuing to be depressed? I guess that’s doable. I’m sorry to all I’ve not spoken to in a while. I guess I’m isolating myself for my own comfort, and because I’ve been so depressed lately. It’s nothing personal, I swear. I want to reconnect, I just don’t know how, or if I can keep it up. I don’t like texting anymore, I want an in person connection. I’ve lost all my irl friends, I’ve been friendless for a few months now. It’s not good for me, to say the least.

And I’m too shy, bashful, introverted, antisocial, socially anxious, awkward, depressed, afraid, afraid of rejection and finding someone who’s not good for me and then have to start all over again. I don’t know how to human anymore, I even had a normal childhood. How can I be so bad at this? How can I be so different from literally everyone else? I can’t even be a normal alterhuman, I’m a freak even in this community. Everyone else has one or a few, or even a whole clade of theriotypes. I don’t even call them theriotypes. I see myself as all animals and see them as my children, which is a bit controversial, I would think, seeing as though therians see themselves as animals. Basically calling everyone my children would just be weird, or unbelievable, right? Well, I don’t consider therians to be my children, for the record, but that’s the interpretation that others would get from this identity of mine, I would think. I wanted to be one of those alterhumans who posts everyday or often enough that no one thinks I’ve left the community, but I pretty much have. I wanted to write essays, and journals, and updates about me and my identities. But I just can’t get myself to believe that anyone even believes or cares the slightest bit about any of that. Or I’m too depressed and tired to write anything anymore. I feel like I’m more of a prick or a black sheep in this community because of my beliefs and identities and morals and such. What am I even supposed to say anymore? How do I explain myself to others? I’m terrible at explaining things. Even if I tried, still no one would fully understand.

I’ll try to explain something right now, I guess. When it comes to how I see myself, I feel like I’m everything, and everyone. Yet, nothing and no one at the same time. Yet, not at the same time, yet, all at once, and neither, and both, and… I can’t even understand it myself. I feel like I am infinite, yet, finite. I am life, I am death. Light, dark. Good, bad. Pure, evil. Love, hate. At peace, angry. Calm, anxious. Beautiful, ugly. Happy, sad. Left, right. Ocean, land. Water, air. Fire, ice. Stone, snow. Nature, humanity. All animals, no animals. All humans, no humans. Man, woman. Both, neither. All life, no life. All death, no death. Eternity, not eternity. Eternal, non-eternal. All time, no time. Existence, non-existence. Existing, not existing. Real, unreal. God, not god. Goddess, not goddess. Supernatural, natural. Mystical, non-mystical. Mythical, non-mythical. Mythological, non-mythological. Divine, infernal. Celestial, cosmical. I am all opposites, and similarities, and everything in between, and everything surrounding. Yet, neither opposites, nor similarities, nor anything in between, nor everything surrounding. At the same time, yet not at the same time. It feels like all a blur in my head, a fog, a cloud. Yet, clear. It feels like wires tangled and knotted in my mind. Yet, untangled and unknotted. It feels like my mind is just a cave, and the only hole of an exit is blocked off by one singular ginormous boulder, and a man is trying to get free by going at the rock with a chainsaw, never making any progress. Yet, the cave is empty, and the way is open, boulder pushed to the side, or never existed in the first place. It is all so confusing and complicated and complex. Yet so simple, and easy, and basic. This is how I can explain what I feel every single second of my existence. I don’t l know how to live like this, with myself. I don’t know how I feel like this, or why. Sometimes I feel like I’m God and sometimes I feel like he’s me. Why do I feel like this, like it’s true? Is it true? Am I delusional? Probably both. Probably neither.

I am me, yet I am you, yet I am everyone, yet I am everything, yet I am no one, yet I am nothing. I am, and I’m not. The only other way I can explain this is with these three dots lol.

…

👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎👋🌎

[ramblinggaijin]

So for context the female Kyoto Sensei at my smaller ES is the mother of a former male coworker of mine whom I used to talk to a lot.

Said coworker was transferred recently to another town, but still comes home during longer breaks. He’s very much a homebody and also very introverted. Kind of the opposite of his mom who is more definitely a bit more extroverted.

Me: Lady Kyoto Sensei! How is your son doing? Did he come home during Obon and do his usual routine of just staying in? I remember when we worked together he said that cuz of the summer heat he usually just liked to stay home during Obon and watch baseball/play Switch games.

Lady Kyoto Sensei: Yes he did. -exasperated sigh- He is such a hikkikomori.

Me:

Tbh I just wasn’t expecting her to straight-up call her son a hikkikomori. Guy is a bit of a shut-in outside of work but definitely not a complete shut-in.

I’m not 100% sure cuz culture/language context but I would think that’d be an offensive thing to say about/to someone given that actual hikkikomori suffer from severe mental disorders and basically have completely withdrawn from society.

Like straight up don’t work, don’t interact with anyone, and don’t leave their rooms.

So not something I would say about someone. Granted I’ve heard kids/teens throw it around loosely when talking about/to friends. But also these are kids not adults. So idk.

[whumpy-wyrms]

(Addition to my previous ask)

What are their personalities/dynamics with each other (Dew, Hayden, and Layla)?

Also does Sir Bonkles like the ball python (Hayden’s snake)?

yay i’ve been wanting to talk about these silly guys :D (also adding Sawyer in cuz he’s Dew’s best friend, just not his roomate)

also this got long so i’m putting it under the read more :3

i’ll start with personalities:

so Layla is just overall very silly but also extremely smart and a genuinely nice and caring person. she’s the embodiment of quirky weird girls but doesn’t let people’s negative opinions of her affect her life. she loves animals and nature, especially insects and plants (also frogs and cats). she also really likes astrology but idk what her star sign is cuz i haven’t figured out their birthdays yet. she likes watching cartoons and anime with Dew and Sir Bonkles. she’s also a programmer and video game developer i think, her and Hayden wanna make a game together :3

Layla’s pronouns are she/her, she’s 23, autistic (because i can’t write a neurotypical character for the life of me), shes trans, bi, and 5’4 (one inch taller than Dew HAHAHA)

Hayden is my blorbo i love him. he’s a super nice and playful person, often goofing around and trying to make his friends laugh and have fun. he’s very hyper a lot and def has golden retriever energy. he loves reptiles and will not stop talking about them to anyone who would listen (same) and spends lots of time with his snake Mars. he loves to play video games but also likes being active outside and plays some sports. he and layla are definitely the two extroverts of the group lols

Hayden’s pronouns are he/they, he’s 23, he’s also autistic and has a special interest in reptiles, he’s got ADHD, he’s asexual, pan, and he’s 5’6 (my height)

Sawyer’s a mystery. he’s very closed off and reserved, doesn’t like talking to people much and doesn’t have much friends. but he’s really really nice when you get to know him, it just takes him a while to open up to people because of his social anxiety. he loves to play video games (his special interest) and is overall very introverted. but he loves his dog Rufus more than anything and spends a lot of time taking him on walks outside. he’s also kinda punk rock and has some piercings and tattoos, and he likes playing guitar and making music with Dew :)

Sawyer’s pronouns are he/she and she’s bigender, he’s 22, autistic, has OCD, she’s pansexual, and is 6’1 (the youngest AND tallest of the group)

alright so now their dynamics with each other and Dew:

Sawyer is Dew’s childhood best friend, they’ve been through everything together. Sawyer also has a crush on Dew, but has been too scared to tell him for years. after Dew’s parents died and he moved in with Layla and Hayden, he and Sawyer kinda started drifting further apart. this is because Sawyer didn’t know the other two that well, and she’s just a really socially awkward person and is scared talking to new people. also some other secret spoiler stuff i can’t say, but yeah.

Dew also likes Sawyer but he also likes Hayden and Layla (who are in a relationship) and is scared to tell any of them. i should also probably mention that they’re all polyamorous because i’m on the aroace spectrum and don’t know ANYTHING about romantic relationships, and monogamy just seems boring to me (/lh). so yeah Dew has a crush on all his friends but is a literal CHICKEN (they also like him back but don’t mention it to him. it’s also super obvious i mean Dew is a terrible liar).

Hayden and Layla are the gayest straight couple ever LOLL they’re silly!! (also not straight cuz they’re both bi/pan) they love each other!! i’m happy for them :) don’t know much else to say about that haha. like i said, Sawyer isn’t super close to them or anything but they like to have video game nights together so that’s fun.

Rufus, Sir Bonkles, and Mars all get along with everyone. Hayden doesn’t really let Mars near the cat that much because he can get the zoomies sometimes and go crazy (talking about Sir Bonkles but Hayden is also like that), but yeah they’re chill :) they get along and don’t try to kill each other!! (also not a good idea to introduce a snake and a cat irl)

i thiiink that’s about it about them? there’s probably more but those are all the main things!! OH YEAH Hayden is a huge sci-fi nerd and he sometimes desperately wishes he could be abducted by aliens and go on fun space adventures (same bro). and i’m making an alien abduction au with him being a main part of it, so im excited about that :3

[imsopierced]

Here’s the thing. One of my boyfriends good friend moved his girlfriend out here to live with him. So being that she doesn’t know anyone out here she texted me one day and told me that she wanted to have drinks. Being me and how I’m really a introvert I’m like I’m used to being in the house and I don’t go anywhere without my hair being done. She was like I understand and I’m like we could get something to drink tomorrow and maybe go to one of our houses. Fast forward the next day we go in the park for a lil while with our kids and my weird as sister in law comes. Now mind you they was suppose to go to a whole other park. She get there and she trying to piece together why the other girl is there. She finds out that I been texting the girl and she texts me and says that she’s jealous that me and the girl is creating a bond and she don’t wanna feel left out. Like you sound weird first off and second off I’m not even texting the girl like that to begin with and third off I can talk to whoever the hell I want to. Fast forward during the week she starts texting the girl lying to me saying that the girl asked for her number and the girl really didn’t ask for her number she really started texting her because she found out I was texting her. My thing is Idc about her texting the girl it’s the fact that if you really wanted to text the girl you been would’ve you just did it cuz you found out I was. That’s weird as fuck to me. And it’s like she don’t want nobody to be cool with me. She wants everybody to be cool with her. What if I just want to have a relationship with somebody outside of you? Somebody else I could talk to you know. I just want somebody to myself but I’ll never have that 🤷🏿‍♀️