#cuz damn if I’m gonna help someone who isn’t even trying to help themselves

[animazed]

k this may be the withdrawal irritation talking, but literally I need to just channel my aggravation towards yehudit and her failings and just apply them to myself next time I need to do something

[bicheetopuff]

Dynamight and All Mights Character Arcs

⚠️MHA Manga spoilers⚠️⚠️Discussion of ch362⚠️

Okay… this is the only serious post I’m making regarding Katsuki’s death scare. I’ll answer any asks about it but other than that I’m not gonna make anymore posts about this particular topic. Mha isn’t within any of our control and predictions are just that… predictions. In reality, this is Horikoshis story and if he decides to truly break all of our hearts then so be it.

Also I’m not gonna talk about OFA theories and more so their characters themselves. Mainly cuz OFA is complicated and it’s difficult to pinpoint what might actually be happening to it or what it’s doing. I’m just going on based on what would make sense as their arc resolutions and why I think so. Anyways…

Contents:

I: Unfinished business

II: Katsuki’s Stubbornness

III: All Mights incomplete arc and Nighteyes vision

IV: Horikoshi’s writing style

V: Quirk Society

VI: Some Parallels

I: Unfinished Business

So I’m pretty sure we all came to the conclusion that Katsuki’s arc is incomplete and this supposed “death” feels abrupt, rushed, and unsatisfying. Not that if he died at another point it’d be satisfying but with how Horikoshi has written other deaths (which I’ll bring up again later) it’d be very out of character of Hori to present the second male lead with a death that feels so incomplete and tragic.

I’m gonna cut straight to the point: Katsuki has been reflecting on himself for almost 250 chapters. Slowly accepting that he’s in fact, not the best. Thinking about what he did to Izuku when they were younger and finding ways to atone for it. Learning that showing you care about someone isn’t a sign of weakness. Overall trying to be less of an asshole. And most important (in my opinion) learning how to accept help from others. I wanna talk about this point specifically.

Izuku is “win to save” right? His thing is about helping people even when they don’t ask for it, and at the beginning that’s what bothered Katsuki the most about Izuku. Izuku tried to help him when Katsuki didn’t need it and Katsuki thought it was offensive because why would a kid who is good at everything with an amazing quirk need help from a quirkless loser?

This development is what stemmed the “if I can’t save myself, I’d rather not be saved” attitude that he has at the beginning because having to be saved makes him feel just as—if not more—inferior as losing.

(Is this picture recycled from another meta I posted? Yea… yea it is. But the highlighted parts still apply)

It took him a while to be even somewhat okay with accepting help from someone else and the first example was Kirishima in the hideout raid. Y’know, that time where Izuku let someone else be the one to reach out to him no matter how much he wanted it to be him. He said it had to be Kirishima because he knew that Katsuki wouldn’t have accepted his hand. Because he never has. And still hasn’t (no, heroes rising doesn’t count until proven otherwise).

After DvK2 Katsuki became almost hyper-fixated on the fact that he’s been misunderstanding Izuku for damn near 12 years. But also after DvK2, Katsuki hasn’t been given another chance to accept Izukus hand. And yea it’s pretty sappy but it’s an important part of their relationship and Katsukis development that theoretically can happen in the vestige world but wouldn’t make sense in terms of an actual resolution (in my opinion).

II: Katsuki’s Stubbornness

Katsuki is persistent and always has been. Aizawa and All Might have pointed it out several times. He’s grownup being good at everything and at UA is when he starts to be told there’s things he can’t do. He starts to get a taste of failure and tries his best to do what he’s told his incapable of anyway. The earliest example I can think of is during the sports fest when Tsuburaba tried to block Katsuki with his solid air and Monoma’s team is like “heh he can’t break through that.”

And he did anyway.

Or final exams when he was determined to try to beat All Might. Even though he didn’t he still tried his damnedest which I think is the best example despite not winning the way he wanted to. It’s also the first time he accepts Izukus help no matter how much he doesn’t like it. (The amount of parallels from this fight to 362 is crazy when you look at it closely)(we also get a taste of the actual frustration he feels when someone tells him he can’t do something).

“We had no hope of beating you without taking a few risks.”

“Even if it messes me up, I chose this path to victory.”

(…and we call Izuku the self sacrificial one)

Seem familiar? This quotes seem oddly relevant in light of 360-362. He’ll break himself if it means he tries his best for the outcome he wants and…

Meaning: as long as he’s able, he’ll fight to win. It’s apart of his character to not go down easily. He’s simply too stubborn to and it’d be extremely unfulfilling to go down mid-fight and not get back up. Yea, he didn’t get up a second time in his final exam because he passed out but, Izuku still made sure he claimed a victory even if it wasn’t the way he wanted. Plus he didn’t need to get up a second time. Katsuki deserves a victory to actually go his way this time, not for the victory itself but to prove his own expectations of his strength. He wants to be the strongest, right?

Who is Katsuki Bakugou if not someone that lives up to their own word?

If not for himself then for Izuku. To be the person Izuku looks up to.

III: All Mights incomplete arc and Nighteyes vision

So All Might has always been one to keep secrets from most people. When Izuku found out that All Might kept the fact that Nighteye knew about OFA and didn’t like him before they even met, he was offended, remember? And offended by the fact that Mirio was supposed to be the successor that All Might was settling with. Emphasis on settling.

Nighteye made it clear that he thinks Izuku is a lousy choice in a successor because he thinks “the burning desire to help people” isn’t enough to be a suitable candidate despite the fact that that’s how All Might was metaphorically born. And he still believes that despite Izuku’s quick improvement (up until his dying moments at least, but that’s beside the point).

So theory time:

I’ve actually been thinking about this for a while I just didn’t think Katsuki would have to get so hurt for it.

Some of Nighteyes dying words was about how Izuku proved that the future can be changed but during the Chisaki battle Uraraka and Izuku also proved that it takes will and conviction to change the future. To change fate. However, All Might has already secretly accepted that he is going to die which is why he never told the foresight to Izuku.

However…

He’s fighting to live for Izukus sake. Not his own. From this point in the story, yea Izuku needs him and All Might knows that. But later, after endeavors agency arc All Mihht starts to slowly believe that Izuku doesn’t need him anymore and in Izuku’s vigilante arc, All Might starts to see his thoughts being proven correct.

“You won’t need to look back to me.”

All Might began to realize that he’s not someone Izuku needs anymore, as harsh as that sounds. He became someone Izuku sought out to protect rather than the other way around and being aware of that is frustrating for him.

The panel of All Mights response was small and on the next page so I didn’t add it but all he said was “thank you.” He didn’t go on some kind of tangent about continuing to fight to live.

He recognizes that he’s not keeping the promise he made to Inko. He’s supposed to be the one protecting and teaching Izuku but the table turned (in a more obvious way since Izuku has been the one protecting and teaching All Might in the first place). But in the same way that he recognizes himself as not being someone Izuku needs anymore, he recognizes the people that Izuku does need. I think when it comes down to protecting himself or protecting someone he knows that Izuku still needs in his life, he’d choose the latter because he’s dedicated the rest of his life to doing things for Izuku’s sake. Not his own. And who’s the person that’s been most recognizable to All Might as the most important person in Izuku’s life?

I think All Might is gonna see Katsuki on the ground and be prepared to die for him just as Katsuki was prepared to die for Izuku (ch285). It would come full circle from when he was unwilling to try to save Katsuki in chapter one until he saw Izuku go for him first.

This is where I’ll start to sound desperate but it’s a legitimate thought I’ve had for a while. All Might can still go into his muscle form. And there’s no proof that OFA is completely gone other than ‘a feeling’ All Might had in his fight in Kamino. The original theory about why All Mights vestige is still ghostly was because he’s still alive but, what if it’s because he still has shreds of OFA and since he still has it, he hasn’t become a true vestige yet? This is something I thought of way before 362 because something just never felt right about it? Why would Nighteyes vision take place after All Mights retirement?

Nighteye didn’t say he’d encounter AFO again, assuming he knows what AFO looked like and what state he was in after All Might “beat” him 6 years ago. Just like All Might was able to recognize AFO immediately, Nighteye would too.

Do you remember his run in with stain? How stain threatened to kill him for talking down on himself? Stain showed All Might that despite feeling useless, there’s still people that believe in him. And he hit him with this:

A hero only exists for the sake of others…

That’s what he’s been doing, hasn’t it? Except in the state he’s in, he can’t be a real hero anymore can he? He’s felt useless. Like a Deku.

OFA is a power all about will and love. Katsukis in trouble and Katsuki means something to Izuku so… he’ll pull through despite thinking he can’t. Just like he did here:

Yes, it’s sad. But in my brain it makes sense and it’d complete All Mights character nicely. I think he’s being brought up to often in this fight for him to sit there and continue to just watch.

I’m sure Katsuki isn’t the only person that’s realized this about Izuku and has been inspired by it. And I think All Might being able to use OFA immediately with no drawback when he got it adds a tinge of irony there.

Do I think he’ll be the one to save Katsuki? No. But I think he’s gonna “face that other villain” while someone else heals Katsuki and OFA does whatever it does. And hopefully Izuku will be there eventually to lend a hand that Katsuki can finally accept.

Also I’d like to point this out before moving on:

Beginning of the story, rain started. The beginning of this shitshow.

Right after Izuku was found by Katsuki and brought home by his classmates. All Might letting someone else protect and raise him because he knows he can’t do anything that he considers meaningful for him anymore. The rain stops. When All Mights attitude changes after Stains lecture.

Weather has a sudden change again and it’s about to rain. What if it’s All Might heading to the battle field? He accidentally caused the rain before when he protected Katsuki (ch1). So what do you think will stop the rain once it’s started? I personally think it’ll be All Might accepting his unfortunate fate and dying happy doing something he always loved doing again. Being a hero and dying a hero. Not dying as some retiree.

Anyways…

These next two points are a little more logistical.

IV: Horikoshis Writing Style

There haven’t been very many deaths in mha. But each time they died with someone they cared about around or someone that cares about them (minus midnight).

-Twice saving Toga and compress and giving back Togas Handkerchief

-not a death scene but Mirio and Tamaki using each other as crutches when they were both really injured.

-Nighteye dying in the presence of All Might, his sidekick, disciple, and the kid that changed his negative attitude about his foresight (Izuku changing the future but not dying to Chisaki).

-again not a death scene but Kirishima sacrificing himself for Mina when Gigantomachia tried to grab her.

-not a death scene again but Katsuki sacrificing himself for Izuku.

A sudden change in that pattern just wouldn’t make sense in my opinion. Katsuki taking a senseless beating and dying is inconsistent writing to me so he’s gonna get back up cuz I say so.

V: Quirk Society

There’s not much to this so I’ll get straight to the point:

Recovery Girls existence

Best Jeanist survived a massive hole in his abdomen from AFO despite not being able to be healed for damn near half an hour (and we didn’t know he was still alive for like 150 chapters). Izuku gets his shattered bones healed in minutes despite it taking months to heal that kind of injury naturally. Katsukis injury seems healable when you take the verses medical care into consideration.

In terms of strategy when it comes to this fight I think it’d be dumb to not have Recovery Girl and a medical team on standby in AFO or ShigAFOs battlefields. I’m sure there’s medical and rescue on standby at the other battle fields too for after fights but it’d be dumb not to have at least someone at the fight against the biggest threat.

VI: Parallels

This is just stuff I haven’t already pointed out

heh yea…

Half-assed Conclusion

Katsuki accepting Izukus help and Izuku potentially saving his life isn’t him being a damsel. It’s a resolution to his character and is purely his own. I don’t think any other conclusion to his character arc would be satisfying until he accepts help from Izuku. Will it kinda be a test of Izuku’s control over his heart? Maybe. Will Izuku probably go ballistic? Probably. But whatever happens with Katsuki is Katsuki’s development only (and some all might).

Idk this may be me being in denial and desperate but this last chapter kinda screwed me up and made me think about the story a lot and how weird and out of place this chapter feels. It makes me feel better to word dump and put my thoughts somewhere that isn’t my brain so. This post probably doesn’t make much sense cuz I wrote it pretty quickly. Sorry in advance I guess lmao.

I’m not talking about this anymore and I’m probably gonna take a little break from mha for a bit. I’ll still be updating my fic for anyone that’s keeping up with that but other than that I’ll be avoiding the manga for a bit which is why I won’t be talking about this subject for a while.

[obeiii-mee]

How will the bros react to MC self-doubting themselves? Like saying bad things about them or can't be serious someone give them compliment.

Supportive demon bois coming right up! Sorry I took so long to write this anon! Thank you so much for the ask! (Also, thank you all for the love on my previous posts!)

————————————

The Brothers with an MC who self doubts themselves:

Lucifer:

-As the embodiment of pride itself, Lucifer has an overwhelming amount of confidence, almost all the damn time

-So, he was flabbergasted to learn that you weren’t the same

-He always insisted that you aren’t anything but perfect, yet you always seemed to brush the compliments off with a shrug and an awkward smile

-Well, shit, we can’t have that

-Lucifer just got 10x more serious about the matter

-He pulls a really stupid concerned face whenever you insult yourself and he looks more and more like a 48 year old man/dad each time it happens

-He, as of late, increased the number of pet names he has for you and the amount of compliments he gives you each day

-He refuses to let you talk badly about yourself anywhere, at any point in time and encourages every little step you take towards bettering yourself like crazy

- Lucifer wants to prove to you that you are an absolute ray of sunshine and he will go to any lengths to do just that (do not ask)

-He’s even more affectionate than usual which confuses just about everyone in the House of Lamentation, yourself included

-His brothers are feeling a disturbance in the force and they don’t know how to feel about it

-You are possibly the best thing that’s happened to him since he fell as angel and Lucifer is ready to do whatever he can to help you realise that

Mammon:

-“You’re an idiot!”

-“*Sigh*, I know.”

-“Wha-Wait! Y-you can’t say thAT!”

-The Great Mammon is seriously worried about his human

-Being the dense motherfucker he is (i still love him tho) it took him weeks to realise you’re not all that confident in yourself

-At some point in your relationship, he jokingly called you annoying and you just went “Yeah I’ve been told. Sorry.”

-His jaw literally dropped and he almost cried

-He would have choked if he was drinking something

-Tsundere Mammon has gone bye bye and here comes the cuddling teddy bear that is your boyfriend

-He also doesn’t have as much self love for himself as he sometimes pretends to have so he’s kinda in the same boat

-Which means your boat is leaking and you’re perfectly fine with it while he’s panicking and trying to throw water overboard with his hands

-His brothers call him an idiot a lot but he’s a very sociable guy with people skills that he uses all the time in order to coax you out of your self pitiying shell

-Will whine every time you call yourself ‘useless’ or disagree with his compliments because what the hell, you’re literally the most gorgeous being ever let me love youuuu

-When it comes to you and your happiness, he ain’t fucking around. He will snarl at anyone that even looks at you in the wrong way

-Did that to Lucifer once, guess a what happened

-You’ve definitely helped him come to terms with the fact that he is loveable and not a good for nothing scum

-So now it’s your turn!

-Let him kiss your insecurities away please

-Your presence makes him feel wanted so he wants the same for you!

Levi:

-Well then

-It takes two to tango ya know?

-He is the KING of self loathing and no confidence whatsoever in anything he does so every time you put yourself down, he counters it with a self deprecating insult as well

-“I suck.”

-“Nah, you’re pretty awesome normie. I’m the shut in, disgusting otaku who can barely set foot outside his bedroom without having an anxiety attack.”

-It’s like you’re trying to outdo the other on who is worse

-Truth is, he really admires you, especially knowing you chose to date him; an anime nerd with no social life and no communication skills whatsoever

-It hurts a bit, every time he builds up the courage to actually compliment you and you not taking it seriously

-That’s because he recognises that he’s the same and just as harsh on himself as you are

-Levi knows self hatred is something that takes time to demolish

-But you are his Henry after all (also his partner but whatevs)

-He’s not gonna leave you hanging when you need him the most

-He also gradually stops calling you a normie as your relationship progresses, though it still slips through every now and again

-Basically, the first time he realised that you think negatively of yourself, his immediate reaction was: Haha lmao relatable

-But now, every time it happens, he gets all serious

-Puts his controller down and everything, it’s like witnessing a very rare phenomenon and it’s creepy as shit

-He’s also made an effort to be more physically affection though he is kinda shy about it because damn it he just wants to hug you every time you speak badly of yourself

-Probably writes a list at some point stating all the reasons why you are better than him and Ruri chan combined, it’s rlly sweet

Satan:

-He’s a bit curious as to where that mentality has come from

-What triggered you to be so self doubtful?

-He’s basically your psychotherapist and asks you a lot of questions trying to find different causes and solutions for your issues

-Honestly, he puts so much effort into trying to understand, reading books about it from the human realm and whatever he can find in order to help you

-He scrunches up his nose every time you call yourself an idiot or anything of the sort

-Satan knows that insisting you’re wonderful won’t exactly help you overcome this problem of yours

-But that doesn’t stop him from doing it

-It’s not like you can ignore his comments because he will keep complimenting you until you accept them

-He also repeats a lot of pick up lines but that’s just part of being his partner

-What do you mean you’re worthless?!! He would literally give away all of his books and his hatred for Lucifer in exchange for your well being!

-Satan is possibly the smartest out of all of his brothers, so he uses a tactical approach on this one

-Direct affectionate gestures don’t work on you so he’s gonna be more subtle

-Would slightly hint that you are amazing every time you do something for him, like fetching him a book or something

-“Ah thank you. I don’t know what I would do without you love.”

-He’s a lot smoother than he gives himself credit for

-He just appreciates your existence and that there’s someone out there that he doesn’t need to be act hostile or fake toward

-Satan is ready to sit down and listen to you talk about your insecurities for hours on end

-You would quietly say something bad about yourself and he would run through the House of Lamentation before bursting into the room you are in, shouting ‘No! That’s wrong!’ (going Danganronpa on your asses)

-“Welp, I fucked up again. I can’t do anything right.”

-And then, in the distance you hear boss music starting

Asmo:

-*Shocked Gasp*

-How could you say such things about yourself???? Is that even leGAl?

-Of course, the literally prince of Lust, with all of his narcissism, has never experienced things like ‘self doubt’ of ‘bad self esteem’

-Pfft, the fuck is that?

-He only uses the most positive of words when he describes himself

-So obviously he almost falls off the bed when he hears you insulting yourself for the first time

-But ya know, that would leave bruises on his beautiful skin

-“Oh darling, you’re not annoying or a moron! You’re not anything like Mammon!”

-That was a below belt fatal hit, press f in the chat for the second eldest

-At some point, he just genuinely believes you’ve been spending too much time with Levi and that his negativity started rubbing off on you

-But then you tell him you’ve always been like this and he almost has a crisIS

-He’s like ‘Haha, no, we’re going to get a spa day out tomorrow and a few shopping sprees so I can prove to you that you are magnificent in every way imaginable.’

-Asmo loves pampering you in general but on the days he sees you feeling extra sorry for yourself, he goes above and beyond

-Gets very hurt when you brush off his compliments because he just wants you to accept the fact that you’re beautiful

-He’s like a supportive mom lmao, whenever you’re feeling self doubtful, he goes “You’re doing great sweetie, keep it up I’m really proud of you.”

-It’s up to you to decide whether that helps or not

-He’s such a sweetheart in reality, it’s hard to remember that he’s supposed to be horny all the time

-Well he is but that’s not the point, you’re way more important

-Asmo is so much fun to write cuz I can make him so dramatic it’s hilarious

Beel:

-Oh no :(

-He gets very sad everytime you self deprecate yourself

-You can’t do it with him in the room because he’s going to start crying and give you this kicked puppy stare, it will break your heart

-Beel kinda comes over and goes “If I give you some of my food will you please stop saying bad things about yourself? Because it’s not true.”

-Well you can’t say no to that face

-He feels like it’s his fault you’re this self doubtful even though you’ve tried to explain to him you’ve always been like this

-He goes crying to his twin half the time because he doesn’t know what to do

-“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to drop it! Fucking hell, I’m such a fucking klutz.”

-“Sniffle no you’re not.”

-He’s like, giving you large portions of his food now

-Because food makes him happy so he wants you to be happy too

-🙂

-His brothers go in shock every time because the only other person Beel has ever shared his food with before was Belphie

-Physical affection goes through the roof with this guy

-Bone crushing hugs btw

-Your self worth is so immeasurable with him, you can’t even measure it

-W h o a

-I’m being serious, don’t talk badly about yourself in front of him unless you want to be hugged into next week

-You are a literal angel in his eyes, of course he thinks highly of you

-He’s just hoping his presence isn’t making your self esteem worse, that’s the thing that keeps him up at night

-Idk why but he does think that he is a bad influence on your mental well being since he’s a demon

-Beel gives you compliments all the time and it confuses him when you laugh them off uncertainly because he wasn’t joking or lying??

-He’s always supportive of your choices and encourages you to be more confident

-The same way you show your support everytime you come to his games to cheer him on

-Overall, he just wants you to feel special and appreciated

-Because you deserve it

-IneedmyselfaBeel

Belphie:

-He feels like absolute shit

-Becuase he’s well aware he‘s called you a few...not so nice words in the past

-Back then, he only thought he meant everything he said but now that he’s hearing you accept his insults and actually repeating them yourself?

-It hurts his brain and he wants to smash his head against all four walls of the room for being such a cretin

-You do tell him it’s not exactly his fault you think so badly of yourself

-But he still believes he fueled it

-So now he needs to fix it

-He’s tried everything and I mean everything

-It’s kinda working, slow progress is made which he’s really happy about but you know, it’s gonna take a while

-He finally settles on physical affection as the best way to communicate his gratefulness for you being youself

-Oh, he wasn’t hugging you before? He is now, get your ass next to him and let him cuddle you

-Handholding has increased by 69% in the last month, sorry for the loss of your right hand with how much he squeezes it

-Sometimes, he can’t help but a throw an insult at you in a playful manner, because he’s an asshole

-But he always makes sure you understand that he was just joking

-He’s such a little shit, you would be having a chat with him and you would subtly drop a insult at yourself hoping he wouldn’t notice

-But then he stops dead in his tracks, kisses you, says “Shut up, you’re stunning” and then he goes right back to the previous conversation like nothing happened

-Accept his compliments damn it otherwise he will continue to bug you about it for the rest of the day

-He’s an eboy and he’s a dickhead a times, but he just goes soft for you tbh

-If you’re feeling really bad about yourself, he won’t even say anything

-He will just big spoon you for the next 24 hours, good luck going to the bathroom or any meals during that time

-Because once you’re in his grip, you’re not getting out that easily

-He gets so pissy if anyone says something even slightly negative about you to your face

-One time, a random demon called you stupid in one of the classes at RAD and he was like ‘bïtch excuse me what?’

-Snapped his head around at him and everything

-He would have done something worse but he was lazy and feeling really petty

-So Belphie kicked him in the privates from under his desk like a damn spoiled brat

-And then he turned his head back to you, all smiles and rainbows and puppies

-I’m simping so hard for a fictional character wtf

-I had to write more protective Belphie cuz I can’t find anything of the sort anymore and I need flUFF

(Haha, I don’t know what this post is, my writing has officially taken a shit lmao. Sorry this took so long to finish, I kept going back to edit all of them)

Al~

[riofann]

Rio Random 4

Things got a lot better after that, to your surprise. But you had both decided that you were basically going to do a redo and actively  work on your relationship. It was a bit difficult at first. But you felt better when you saw Mick removing drugs from your house. He also got you a security system that you could look at from your phone to see who has been in and around the house. You didn’t smell Beth around your house as often either. You actually didn't hear much about Beth, as far as you were concerned things were being dealt with.   

Rio would stop by two times a week at least on top of dates breakfast, lunch, brunch, dinner, or dessert. He was a romantic at heart actually, you would find flowers at home or at work sitting on your desk. He often used to look at you and smile which made you blush. You also met Marcus and Rhea one night at a state fair. Rhea was like Rio, hard to read you could see why the two ended up together. All together your relationship was far from perfect but you could honestly say you were happy. 

One late afternoon you rushed home from work. Rio had sent you a text saying he had left a present for you. He often did this when he found lingerie that he liked and wanted you to wear it. Some dates he had dressed you from head to toe, others he provided the undergarments. Not that your taste was bad but he enjoyed doing this. 

When you open the door to your home you hear voices coming from the bottom of your house before you could turn around and walk away you come face to face with a strange woman. 

“Uh hi” Ruby greets uneasily 

“Who are you?” You ask 

“Uh Krystal”

Quickly Beth comes around the corner “Oh Y/N I was just ummm....”

You close your door now pissed, what are you doing in my house. Mick had moved all the drugs from your home, Rio had promised you nothing was left in your house. You looked around to see your house in disarray before turning your attention back to Beth  and these other women.

“Oh well Rio wanted me to drop off something”

“Did he? Inside my house? He doesn’t even have a key, so how’d you get in?” 

“Well Mick helped with that” “Okay what are you dropping off” 

“Uh,” “Right let me just give him a call I’m sure he would love to hear about this”

“NO! Let's not bother him you know he is busy right Be... be be because he wouldn't like that right Krys?” Annie interjects

“Or should I call the police?”

Without warning Beth pulled out her gun and pointed it at you

“What are you doing?” Ruby asked in horror 

“Alright Sit” she says motioning with the gun 

“Are you gonna tell me what you're doing here in my house Elizabeth?”

Instinctively the two women looked at her as she looked shocked as well “How did you?” 

“Elizabeth Boland, you have  5 children with your ex husband Dean right? Used to be a stay at home wife? Did I get that right?” 

“SIT!” she demands “No, what are you gonna do? shoot me?”

“SIT!” she turns to look at Annie and Ruby before turning her attention back to you “Who told you?” 

“Oh uh Mrs. Doubtfire...  Yea i was stopping by to give you that book i borrowed and she said there was no such thing as Krystal had no idea what i was talking about then she told me everything”

“That damn woman” 

“SIT!” 

���NO!  If you're gonna point a gun at me then I expect you to shoot.” 

Ruby tugs at her arm “Beth lets just go” “NO ITS HERE” she yells while yanking her arm back  “you think you are so special, that's what he does you know. Make you feel special then he just dumps you like you're nothing!”

“But I’m not you Beth, and i'm not Rio, so whatever you're looking for its not here and whatever beef you have take it up with him”

“I SAID SIT!” 

“I'm not deaf i don't know why you're yelling” 

“Beth” Annie tries to calm the situation Beth with a bewildered look turns to look at Annie “NO!”

“This is bad” Ruby comments 

“You can't just threaten her life because of some guy....Beth” Annie states  

“I am not all I need her to do is sit Annie!....I know that it’s here it just has to be...” 

As they argued within themselves you felt like it was the perfect opportunity to sneak away as you got close to the door. You turned abruptly to open it when you heard commotion followed by  sharp pain on your side, you looked down to see blood seeping through your clothes. You slowly fall to the floor back resting against the wall. 

“OH MY GOD BETH!” “SHE WAS GETTING AWAY” she defends “HE IS GOING TO KILL US” Annie states looking at her sister like she had 5 heads “I’M SO SORRY Y/N” she says rushing towards you 

“YOU BITCH” You kick her in the chest causing her to fall back, you groan and hold onto your side 

“This isn't good please don't kick me none of this was supposed to happen” Ruby says slowly crouching down next to you

“Put pressure on it” Annie instructs

“I need towels!” 

“It's gonna be okay” Ruby tries her best to sooth you “I can't believe you” 

“I didn't” Beth says while holding onto your wound

Annie rushed back with towels in hand

“Uh guys we have to take her to the hospital” You don’t know when it happens but you start to fade away “Y/N! Can you stand?” “Y/N!” Annie calls your name “she's not... Y/N stay awake 

“What's wrong with you?” Ruby scolds

“What? Ruby..” 

“Why are you trigger happy”

“It was an accident, help me get her in the car!” 

“Well we can't go out the front door”

“Then help me get her through the fucking back door Annie”

“Oh my god” Annie says throwing her hands up 

When 30 minutes pass Rio is beyond infuriated with you. You were not picking up his calls or answering his texts and from what he knew you were at home.He doesn’t  know why you flaked on him, he thinks you were in a drunken slumber wondering how you got back into it, you had shown signs of improvement. 

When he gets to your house however he opens the door, he hears Coconut’s barking and he immediately spots the pool of blood by the door

“Go find her is all he needs to say to Mick”  

He walks through your home, there were multiple holes cut in your walls, holes in the cushion seat on the couch, furniture overturned. When he walks into the bedroom everything is in disarray just like the living area. Carefully he walks down the steps and spots your bag. He thinks you were ambushed. His mind goes into overdrive and is thinking of who would have the gull to do such a thing as far as he was concerned everyone knew enemy wise especially in this line of business that children and wives/girlfriends were out of the question. So whoever had the gull to do such a thing was bold and he’s wondering who it could be. He makes a few calls before he’s sitting in front of your laptop trying to log in. another phone call and he’s given the password. When he looks through the security footage nothing but rage takes over. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After pacing the floor in silence Ruby explodes with emotion “He is going to kill us!” 

“He doesn't know where we are” Beth counters

“I have a child Beth and I need to call Stan and let him know what’s going on!” 

“So do I Ruby, I have 5 to be exact,  he wont do anything she's just a placeholder anyway”

Ruby looks at her in disbelief “Are you kidding me he broke up with YOU to be with HER she is no placeholder”

“She's not special he can find another woman  like her anytime soon” Beth states dismissively 

“Beth i don't like this you need to call him and tell him it was a  mistake” Annie jumps into the conversation 

“Relax he doesn't know where we are he’s not stupid plus Dean will throw his ass in jail”

Putting her hands up Ruby states “I can’t believe you” before she walks away A brief moment of silence before Beth’s phone starts ringing

When they all look at the phone only unknown flashes through the screen after the 5th time the screen is black for good

“Elizabeth please for our sake just tell him” Ruby pleads “we can’t be hidden forever” 

“NO! Now shut up and let me think!” 

“Or what you're gonna shoot me” Ruby expresses frustrated 

“It was an accident!” 

Ruby scoffs, “Like shooting him too? I'm starting to think you’re trigger happy”

“Don't start accusing me you shot someone in the foot!” 

“That was an accident! We all know it was, but you just can't let this life go huh. You can't let this power go so whoever stands in your way you're gonna get rid of them” 

Beth walked up to Ruby looking at her right in the eye “You're right so move out of my way” she didn't have time to be arguing with her so if that meant intimidating her she would. 

Annie quickly got between the two and separated them. “Guys i cant right now please not now, i can't deal with this, we just need to stick together” 

Beth was right Rio couldn't locate them at first but he had found you. You were in the surgical icu stabilizing after your surgery. Because you were considered a Jane Doe no one was really allowed to see you, but Rio had his connections and he walked in to see you fast asleep before walking out. He says nothing as Mick drives him over to Beth’s house. Nothing was out of the ordinary except Beth was missing. He also had other cars posted outside of Ruby’s house and Annie's. 

“Aii bet” he hangs up the phone irritated that no one could locate Beth, she had become a protégé, so good at hiding things from him now. 

"You gon’ have to get rid of her” Mick states before looking at Rio,  “She shot you, planned your assassination," he scoffs "stolen, sabotaged, lied, how much more you gon let her get away with"

“I cant get rid of her, if i do i gotta deal with the other 2, not to mention the stupid ass husbands that's almost 10 kids in foster care, too much heat its bad for business now anyway, plus I'm still under the microscope cuz of Turner” 

“Both can’t co exist  though, so you either with Beth or you with Y/N.”

“Fuck me”

“Gotta make a move boss”

“Ima figure something out” 

It takes 2 days but he finally locates them. Abruptly woken from their sleep and thrown in a van they find themselves in an unknown place, kneeling in front of him, with plastic bags underneath them. 

“Please i have children” Beth tries to plead her case 

Rio’s shoulders roll back before he speaks “Nah see you can’t keep doing that mama, you can't keep provoking me and asking for mercy cuz you got kids.”

“I'm a mother, they need their mother!”

“Please Rio” Ruby interjects 

“See that's the problem, I hoped you being a mother, you would actually be more careful but I get it now. You just wanna be reckless and use me as your cover. Shoot me 3 times it's my fault. Steal my fault, lie my fault, plot to kill me my fault" his shoulders roll "what was Y/N’s fault why you shoot her?" Already knowing the answer he wanted to see what she would  say 

"She knows my name I know you told her"

"She's my girl"

"Right just like I was but unlike her you can't replace me you need me!” 

"Humor me Beth, are you jealous?" 

Beth scoffs “of what?"  

"Y/N"

She scoffs again "you wish! You probably get off knowing 2 women want you" 

He licks his bottom lip and smiles. It takes a minute before he speaks “So what should i do with you, all of you? I know I’m tired of this game, we’ve been playing it for too long. Aint y’all tired of wondering if im gon kill you?” He asks addressing Annie and Ruby

“Please I promise to walk away” Annie offers 

“Annie shut up!” Beth scolds 

“NO! YOU SHUT UP BETH GOD YOU ARE SELFISH! ALWAYS HAVE BEEN!” 

“Annie I’m trying to....” Before she can finish she stops after she hears her phone ringing  

Rio looks down at the phone “Talk it out I gotta take this call” he says before walking away 

The girls don’t say anything but look at each other. When they see him return Beth comments “I got this let me speak.” waiting for him to sit down before she begins “You can’t kill us and you know it. So you can run back to your little girlfriend and kiss her wound and tell her she's special and I'll go back to doing my thing” she says snidely Both Annie and Ruby looked at her shocked.

“She is, it could have been you but the 3 bullets kinda changed my mind”

“OH MY GOD! Can you let that go!”

“I did then I found out you hired a hitman and some kid to shoot me. Things change all the time between us,  you know this”

“So what are you gonna do? Because we have work to do”

“I know.” He nods at the men behind them. The zip ties are cut before he walks away “I’ll see you around yea?”

When he leaves they all look at each other shocked that he even let them walk away. They remain in that position until all the men leave. 

“See I told you!”

“I can’t do this Beth you need some serious help and I’m not willing to wager my family as collateral for it”  Ruby states “It worked” “For you! Not for us, you think it's just a one woman show where you do everything? Like your actions don’t have any effect on our lives'' “Ruby it worked I don’t know why you’re being such a baby about it” “Yea well better that than you” 

Annie interjects once again  before things get heated “Guys can we just figure out how to get home”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So what now?” Mick asks frustrated with the whole thing. “She still working for you?”  he knew the pattern all too well Beth would do something to get back at Rio 

“Nah we moving, leaving Michigan, getting new headquarters. She wanna run the business? Cool, but no protection, no muscle, no supply of weapons, no connections, yea she can print money but she can’t operate or deal, not without me. Make sure everyone knows if they entertain her they are dead. I don’t care what it is if I find out I’m putting a bounty on your head. She right though I can’t kill her but i can kill her business” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It took a few days but when you regain consciousness in the hospital you see one of Rio’s men at least you’re assuming he is sitting by you. You two don’t speak and you go back to sleep. The next day police stop by to question you about your shooting, you tell them the story Rio’s guy told you, a home invasion gone wrong. They leave satisfied with the explanation. Rio comes to visit a few days after  you have been moved to a step down unit that was more private.

The door opens and you watch as he walks in “Rio”

Hey mama he approaches you with hands behind his back and as he gets closer a cute teddy bear that has ‘get well soon on it’ 

“How you feeling?”  he asks taking a seat next to you on the bed 

“I got shot” you state factually

“You got shot” he says moving the hair from your face 

“Where have you been? The cops came to see me”

“I know they stopped by, I was handling something. Did you tell them what Honcho told you to say?”

“Yes” 

He smiles and looks at you with a face you can’t quite read

“So where is she?” 

You were hoping he would say dead in a ditch somewhere or something along the lines of ‘you never have to worry about her’ but what he said made you more angry

“At home”

“She's alive?”

“Yea” 

You roll your eyes, was she gonna be thorn on your side for the rest of your life with Rio? “But she won’t bother you” “Yea said that last time and now i have a bullet hole on my side that says otherwise” “Nah she won’t be able to reach you this time cuz we leaving, after you get discharged” 

“What? You want me to move?” 

“Yea,we can...”  You interrupt "There's no we anymore, you're like a bad omen. In less than a year since  i met you I get shot and now i have a bullet wound because of your unhinged ex that you couldn't keep in check and you still think there's a 'we' " 

“I told you,” he runs his hand down his chin “i asked you to be patient” he speaks softly 

“Be patient, meant with you! So you could change not ‘be patient, my crazy ex who i can't control will shoot you months from now but i still need you to understand” you say sarcasm laced in your tone 

“Y/N” “You told me to treat you like any other guy on the street, so I am. We are done!” 

“You can't stay here” he stresses “Why not?” “Beth isn’t my only enemy, and once she finds out my plans she will go to them for revenge” 

“So where are we going? I have a career here! Aunt Brenda and Mia, my parents, I visit their graves often”  

“They can come visit you, You can always get another job, it’s not safe for you here Y/N”

“Was it ever safe? Didn’t you have enemies before? Was I not in danger then” 

“This is different, Beth is vengeful I can’t risk it” 

“Where are we going?” 

“I can't tell you, not now I’m still figuring that out” 

“Typical” “Listen i'm packing up your house I’m gonna get you a new place in a new city you'll get a job” 

“Rio are you kidding me you want me to just up and leave?” “Yea,” he stands up and looks down at you  “it’s non negotiable, i gotta protect you, after you get discharged we leaving” 

“Protect me? From who? The only person I need protection from is you. Rein que le diable (nothing but the devil)” 

He stares at you for a moment  “get some rest” he says before kissing your forehead. He didn’t care about how you felt in the moment protecting you, Marcus, and Rhea were his top priority and he knew that always came with push back no matter who he was talking to.

A/N: as always tell me what you think. Not really a fan of this chapter didn’t know how to go around it. 

[zhansww]

I’ve been wondering how exactly the misunderstanding of my last rambling post came to be and I think it’s cuz of one of two things; cuz I didn’t make it clear what I consider the word “queer” to mean or cuz I didn’t make it clear that the post itself was my own, subjective opinion. I’m not sure how consistent I’ve been with tagging it but I kinda differentiate between (what I think are) rational opinions I have vs emotional ones. The latter ones are obviously subjective and should not be taken as me, lecturing anyone or implying that everyone should feel the same. You either share the same sentiment or you don’t, there’s nothing wrong with it either way. And if my words in those posts seem hostile/condescending, it’s cuz I don’t feel the need to censor any of my subjective views/feelings. What I do think is important and what I try to pay attention to is not to let the negative emotions that certain things evoke in me control my actions. When I see something that I disapprove of in any way, I don’t hijack that post or report it. If my emotional reaction is particular strong, I’ll vent about it in my own post, not theirs. I considered this to be the decent thing to do but I’ve been told by at least one kind, respectful and open-minded person that I am actively making people’s lives worse with those posts, that my words are violent and that my behavior is that of an “unhinged monster” (the irony here is not lost on me). So I’ve been reflecting and I think the next time I feel a particular strong, negative emotion that makes me want to vent, I’ll put a disclaimer beforehand. And now, let me just actually clarify what my point was of that post. I believe that yz is real so I obviously do not assume they are straight. If they are indeed together, then they are queer - i.e. not straight - but that’s literally it. I have no theories or thoughts about what their specific orientation might be and I won’t ever speculate about that either. I wouldn’t mind knowing but unfortunately, they can’t be openly together right now but when they someday are, they’ll hopefully also feel safe and loved enough to share something like that with us. I know for a fact that figuring out your sexuality is a confusing and intimate process which is why I am opposed to speculating about it. I consider it to be too intrusive. But again; that is my subjective opinion based on my own experiences. I do not expect everyone to share this sentiment. One person said that I should expect such speculation and that might be true, maybe I should expect it but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. Seeing certain bxg get mad at solos for assuming yz are straight but then turn around and assume they are [insert any specific sexuality except het] is hypocritical and disappointing in my opinion. I think it’s perfectly fine to have such emotional opinions as long as you don’t let those emotions cloud your judgement and lead to you, reacting in a way that is unreasonable and possibly harmful. I also think that everyone should be willing to have their rational opinions questioned but when it comes to an emotional opinion, it doesn’t have to make sense and it’s probably not gonna change either. To give another example; I hk disapprove of yz r/p/f. And that’s not me, saying it is inherently wrong and that no one should do it. In fact, you could try to make a case about how I should like it and approve of it but it wouldn’t make me change my mind precisely because this opinion is not based on logic but just on emotion. And again, as long my emotional reaction to something doesn’t lead to unreasonable actions, then the emotion itself is alright to have. And like I already said, I thought it was okay to vent those emotions in my safe space but apparently, it isn’t. No one should take those posts personally or like I’m talking to them or lecturing them. I thought that this was all obvious but since I got told otherwise, I will be more concise from now on.

You know, when someone starts a “discussion” by insulting you (implicitly or not), that’s usually a clear sign that they’re not even trying to understand you. I’ve seen at least one person reblog the reblogs and seemingly take some kind of vicious pleasure in seeing someone else sh-t on me. Something like that leads me to think that they already had a negative impression of me to begin with which is why their minds gladly misunderstood me and jumped to the worst possible conclusion. They also all seemed to either ignore my explanations or seemed intent on misunderstanding me, no matter what. To be clear, I don’t blame them entirely for it because I could have expressed my point better but for them to immediately think their misunderstanding is the right one - instead of asking me to explain myself perhaps - is also wrong. Mind you, I don’t expect those people to see or care about this post. The main reason I’m trying to clarify myself is for myself. I said I’ll try to be more concise in expressing my views (regardless of whether it’s a subjective one or not) from now on and I thought I should let this be the start of that. There was one reply in particular that ... affected me a lot harder than I thought anything could. I think it’s cuz my depression already makes me feel like I’m a waste of space 24/7. One thing I take comfort in, though, is the fact that, at the very least, the only one who’s hurting because of it is me, no one else. At least I don’t hurt others. But I got told otherwise. I got called an unhinged monster. The unhinged part is true but also being a monster... it made me feel like I’m less than a waste of space. Like, let’s say if normal people always feel like a 1, I always feel like a 0. Getting insulted like that made me feel like a -1. Instead of feeling like a read newspaper, that’s just waiting to get thrown in the trash, that insult made me feel like I’m the asbestos in the house, something that is actively harmful and you need to get rid of. Does that make sense? Anyway... I engaged in “discussions” despite my better judgement and now, I have to pay the price for it so I also decided that I won’t do that again. Hopefully, there won’t even be any more misunderstandings but if there are and someone hijacks my posts and insults and/or willfully misunderstands me, I will just block them. For my own sanity. And for the record, if there’s something in this or any of my subjective/emotional posts that can be misunderstood, that I didn’t make clear enough; please feel free to ask me about it. Please don’t immediately think the worst of me. And when it comes to my more objective/rational opinions, I am always open for discussions as long as we can remain respectful throughout.

I would also like to express my gratitude to anyone who reached out. I’m not sure if the damage can be undone to be honest (it doesn’t feel like it right now) but anyone who offered words of advice, understanding, support or kindness helped soften it. I cannot express how grateful and appreciative I am for it all, any replies or private messages. You helped make me feel less shitty and I thank you so so much. I’m definitely gonna save all the mental health advice cuz I really did not know how to deal with that overwhelming desire to... stop existing in that moment and I want to keep it in mind if (or when) I get affected this badly by something again. I intend to also reply to the messages privately ofc but for now, please accept all of my love and gratitude~

I’m gonna put the rest - which is more personal - under a cut and also tw cuz I’ll elaborate on my mental health/depression. This isn’t exactly something I want to share tbh but I think I shouldn’t shy away from it either. And I feel like I need to explain myself, just for anyone who cares to know.

—

If you compare life to walking on a path, then I at some point - I don’t even remember when - stopped walking and starting digging a hole for myself. It musta been years ago. Right now, that hole is so deep that I have no idea how to get out of it on my own, much less how to move forward. I think I always knew that there must be something wrong with me mentally. This isn’t something that is being talked about in my family, though, so I never extensively thought about it. Not until earlier this year, when my sister told me that she thinks I’m sick and I should see a therapist. My immediate reaction was to reject the idea but I really couldn’t do that for long. As of right now, I have been tentatively diagnosed (not sure if that’s what you call it in English) with depression but I haven’t actually found a permanent therapist and therefore also not started therapy yet. I have no idea what exactly is wrong with me and this not-knowing makes it somehow worse. I haven’t been properly functioning for the past two days - ever since I got called unhinged monster - cuz those words are burned into my brain by now and keep repeating themselves. It feels like my mind was given another weapon to slowly k-ll me with. It keeps reminding me that that’s what I am and then I start trembling and my breathing gets weird and it’s harder than usual for me to distract myself. And this is all so overwhelming for me, I have truly no idea how to deal with any of it. I don’t even know if I named it right, if it really is called a “depressive episode”. I’m hoping I’ll get to find out what exactly is wrong with me and how I can cope with it once I find a therapist. My lack of knowledge regarding what I myself am going through makes it all very confusing and difficult. Another reason why I kind of organized my thoughts and wrote them all down here is cuz I hope it will help me somehow, make my mind stop letting those really bad thoughts in. But in that moment when I felt especially f-cked up, any words of advice or kindness helped. I hope everyone who reached out knows that. Just... thank you. So damn much.

[keziha-writes]

Coffee College And Skeleton Roomies 1/31

Inspired by this flufftober prompt list

A reverse harem fic focused on Sans and Papyrus from UT, UF, US, SF.

You had to leave that place, you knew transferring wasn't going easy but you couldn't stay, you just hope this time... this place... these people... it could be better. You just didn't quite expect to be meeting this many Skeleton monsters never mind just on your first day. Maybe these guys could be your freinds, your allies...? only time will tell.

Chapter 1

The first day

Bring… ring… bring… ring… bring… ring...

Your alarm sounded once again, that annoying ringtone echoing through the room, that tone seemed like a good one when you set it but now you're regretting it. Last night was pretty rough… How much sleep did you even get? You contemplate ignoring it... you could just switch it off for good this time and turn over and cuddle into your… sleeping bag?? 

You curse under your breath, you’d forgotten. How could you forget? Damn. You jump out of your sleeping bag and look over the mostly empty room for the clothes you set out. How many times have you hit snooze? 

You rush to get ready as fast as you can. No time for breakfast. You're gonna be so late and on your first day. Thankfully you’d at least had the brains to pack most of your stuff in the car yesterday, which is why tonight you slept on the floor in that old sleeping bag… 

Why couldn’t they just let you get in your dorm yesterday? Or something? This is what you get for transferring halfway through the term. You check the time, there's about 30 minutes before your first class, if there was little traffic you could get there in 25… maybe you could make it.

***********

You park up, grab your bag and check you have everything, “phone…? Check… notebooks? Yep. pencil case? Ok. wallet? Don’t forget that!”

You grab your wallet from the glovebox and jump out the car. 

Time…? 3 minutes.. Ok you got this.

You run into the college.

Humans and monsters alike walk around in their clicks, some hanging around by the stairs, others wonder aimlessly, they're either skiving or have later classes, you thought but there wasn't much time to dwell on it as you hurry passed, take two seconds to look at the map to check where you needed to be and booked it for your classroom. 

This class was pretty close to the entrance and easy to find, you knew the next wasn’t going to be half as easy. 

You made it with less than a minute to go, you step into your class after double checking it's the right one. 

It's a rather small lecture hall, most of the students are chatting amongst themselves. Your nerves are spiked by all the unfamiliar faces, but that was good, unfamiliar was why you were here right? But still you just hope you can make good use of this new fresh start. You look around for an empty seat… it took a second but you found one and sat down. And it was just in time because the professor walked in just then. 

He calls the class to attention and everyone takes their seats with some grumbling of course. Then he got right into the lecture. 

You got your things out and started scribbling down as much as you could. 

“Psst...” 

 Was that for me? You think, looking around just in case and see the skeleton next to you looking over.

“Hey… um… new girl, I forgot my pen……” he whispers and you get the hint.

It was inevitable someone was going to ask you for a pen, thankfully you came armed with spares just for that reason. So you hand him a pen.  

“Thanks darlin’, you're a lifesaver,” he hummed. 

Did he just call you darling?? Ok…… 

“Just remember to give it back.” you whisper back, before turning to your work. 

Hopefully the bit you missed wasn't really important… 

Class flew by and you thought you understood most of it, then you had to have a quick chat with the professor to make sure what you learnt in your other college lined up with what he’d taught this class, it was pretty much the same but you still had a little extra homework. 

You take your extra work, overly expensive textbook and your things out of the room. 

You think about how you're probably not getting that pen back, because there was no way that dude was gonna hang around till after your chat with the professor was over. You turn to go back and have a look at that map, you have a while to go before your next class but this one won't be as easy to find so you want to make sure you know where you’ll need to go. 

“Hey new girl!” a small shout comes from behind.

You turn and it was him, that skeleton who borrowed your pen. The first thing you noticed about him though was how tall he was, like he is really compared to you, in fact he towered over you. The next thing was that… like damn this dude has a gold tooth? You didn't see it before since it was on the other side of his skull, he also has a crack through his eye socket. His fashion style? Well you think he must frequent Hot Topic or something, cuz that black jacket with the fur trim hood with that rusty orange sweater?… This guy is edgy as hell. 

“Here.” he holds out your pen to you. 

“Um.. thanks.” you take the pen and toss it into your bag. 

“So… I’m um… curious you got a name darlin’.”

Darlin’ again? Is he trying to hit on you? He seems pretty genuine, maybe he isn't, you don’t really get the vibe that he is but then that one word kinda throws you. So you just smile and give him your name. Oh how about a bad joke!

“Nice to meet you curious.” you add before you can stop yourself, only to cringe seconds later…

Wait is he laughing? No way he liked your dumb dad joke? 

“Good one,” he chuckles. “The names actually Rus, and it’s… um nice to meet you too.” He gives you a shy little smile, that somehow really suits him despite his style. Then Rus holds out his hand for you to shake.

So of course you do, only to recoil. 

“Ouch.” then you laugh. “Was that?”

“A hand buzzer, yeah…” he chuckles again. “never gets old.” 

From looking at him you would have never guessed he was just a shy jokester. Well as they say don’t judge a book by it's cover.

“Say, um… have you… you know... had anyone show you around yet?” he asks.

“No, I haven’t but it can’t be that hard to figure out right?”

“You’d be surprised, you know  I got some time… so... if you do… and-and only if you want, I could... like... show you around.. or something?”

“Are you sure? It would be really helpful but I wouldn’t want to ask that of you.”

“You ain't asking, I'm offering.”

“Alright, If you really wouldn't mind.”

So your new classmate Rus showed you around and he was right it was pretty complicated to get around, you tried your best to take note of the different classes you need to remember but every corridor seemed to look the same, that's one of many things that make the first week or so in a new college so hard. Friends was another but hopefully you were already winning in that area. Rus is rather shy, and quiet but also pretty funny, if you can help it you'd definitely want to hang out more. Seemed like lending him that pen was a wise choice.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next chapter!

I know it's kinda short but I hope you guys liked this chapter, please let me know what you thought of it. Oh and can you guess which prompt this one was? XDD

I'll hopefully post the next one tomorrow at some point.

[real-jaune-isms]

RWBY Volume 8 Chapter 7 Review/Remix

Last episode before the holiday break. The long long long holiday break. And here I am only posting my review the night before we come back... I was having a lot of fun playing my new video games, okay? Let’s just get right into this with the joke everyone has already made. War: What is it good for? Actually a lot, if you can believe it. Only in this specific context though, because the warfare in the American streets these last few days is disgusting and emblematic of what has been wrong with the country for a while. A government leader sending his followers into the nation’s capital on a mission of rage and personal catharsis? Ick. At least in RWBY the tyrant isn’t attacking members of his own population... Oh wait, Mantle. :P

For a moment you might be fooled into thinking we’re starting back in the farmlands of Mistral, maybe getting another look at Oscar’s earlier life or seeing a little more of Nora’s mysteriously tragic past before she and Ren met. But no, these are the wheat farms on the outskirts of Atlas and Sabyrs are charging through like raptors through the tall grass in Lost World. A battalion of Atlesian soldiers, human soldiers I might add, stand armed to meet them. But even if they’re armed they are by no means ready. Monstra keeps coughing up a new wave of Grimm, and I do mean a wave, every minute or two and Atlas is pretty damn whelmed in the face of it. There are some big bots with guns standing in straight lines, but the majority of the defense put up by Remnant’s supreme authority on military power and strength is mortal men with fear in their hearts rather than expendable robot soldiers. And the big bots seem to be lined up in a way that the ones in the front block the ones in the back, so that’s just poor planning too. It’s just a concerning sight all together, and they are not efficiently handling the coming enemy. We cut up to Ironwood in his office, and it seems he is not dealing with this situation well at all. We know he’s under a lot of stress from all the recent events, but they are in fact mostly his own fault due to his poor decision making skills in times of crisis, and his single minded drive he calls a Semblance. Speaking of the eternally expanding list of Ironwood’s bad ideas, he decides to evacuate all the civilians into Atlas’ below ground subway tunnels. Fun fact: There were Apathy among the Grimm Monstra has been spitting out. Second Fun Fact: Apathy were last seen thriving and murdering in an abandoned underground tunnel system beneath a well. If one is familiar with fantasy television pop culture of the last decade, the Crypts of Winterfell might pop into your mind as a similarly poor place to hide all your unarmed women and children. Y’know, cuz in Game of Thrones they were facing a guy who could raise the dead as his minions and crypts are just tunnels full of corpses. Just saying, this could end up being a non-birthday massacre. Whatever captain of lieutenant Ironwood was talking to is hesitant to go along with this idea, but Ironwood puts his foot down by putting his fist down. And so his voice comes on over the city-wide PA system to tell everyone they need to get down into the subway for their own safety. Compared to the organized marching and relative calm of the poor folks down in Mantle, these rich fat cats practically trample each other to run and scream down the stairs. A father is concerned his daughter is going to get snatched up by a swarm of Lancers, but seems even more upset by the squad of airships swooping in to combat them. 

Speaking of airships, we cut to the one Marrow and Harriet are flying. The Ace Ops have arrested YRJ, because of course they did, and they all hear radio chatter as pilots are reporting in about how Monstra is too tough for them to pierce from the outside with any of the weapons available to them. Winter checks in over comms to report her team’s limited successes, and Ironwood tells her to stay on jailor duty for a bit. Yang snarks at Winter for continuing to follow orders despite the circumstances, but conversation is stifled by Monstra coming into view for the group. Jaune laments that the beast now serving as Oscar’s confinement is larger than they had imagined from a distance, and Vine continues to be rigid in his assertions as to just what Grimm can and cannot do. “Grimm don’t take prisoners” he says, as if that’s an irrefutable fact. It’s not like any Grimm have done anything new or unheard of recently, like talk or grow wings or exist within a river of evil sludge or shoot up miles into the air as a geyser or have gravity Dust crystals in their underbelly to fly, or as you are witnessing right now belch out ponds worth of sludge from with waves of Grimm are emerging to fight your ground troops. Yep, we definitely know every single thing a Grimm does, especially one brought here by the mistress of the entire Grimm collective who is commanding most of them here. You sure are smart, Vine... Yang continues to be riled up and ask they be let go to help, but Elm and Vine hold her in her seat. Ironwood is heard giving the Manta jets new orders and reveals Command is working on a solution for Monstra. Winter, naturally wanting to be kept in the loop, asks what that might be. He reveals the science team is putting together a bomb that might be able to take the whale out if detonated inside it. That means Winter and the Ace Ops will be delivering it into the literal belly of the beast. I don’t know if he intends for it to be a suicide mission with the bomb going off as soon as they’ve got it inside, or if it’s just incredibly risky to try and get inside Monstra at all, but Winter pales at this news and her eyes go wide before sadly drooping closed again. She composes herself and grows determined again as she accepts the new marching orders. Jaune and Yang are again audibly against these plans due to the risk to Oscar’s safety, but they are subdued as needed, though we see Winter’s act isn’t absolute and her hands are shaking.

Meanwhile, Salem is having the time of her life doing her best Mickey Mouse impression. Classical music plays as she conducts the waves of Grimm sludge out of Monstra’s mouth like the Sorcerer’s Apprentice playing conductor to the stars themselves. Emerald watched from a distance, and seems less than thrilled about the whole thing. She heads down the halls and has to use her Semblance to keep a Seer from noticing her and potentially reporting her going where she doesn’t need to be to Salem. And where she’s going is the door outside Oscar’s torture room. He’s coughing up blood, and Hazel is still insisting he start telling the truth before Salem loses her patience and just kills him despite how futile it’d be. Instead Oz starts asking some questions of his own: Does Hazel know why Salem sought to recruit him in particular? It turns out she approached him with the promise of making a new world order where there won’t be any kingdoms or Huntsman Academies. Oz just has to laugh at that naiveté. When Salem gets the 4 Relics, there won’t be a world at all. She’s been around for so goddamn long, all she wants is for it to end, and she thinks taking the whole world down is the only way to get it anymore. This just frustrates Hazel, and we learn why. He’s pretty damn sure Salem can’t die at all, because when she first approached him about working together he spent the better part of a day killing her over and over and over again. This man, whom we know from the Battle of Haven to have massive reserves of Aura and strength to endure and keep fighting, kept fighting until he was too worn down and exhausted to lift his fists again. And in that time of weakness and awe at her power, Salem made her sales pitch that even if he couldn’t kill the one leading the Grimm he could at least have vengeance on the establishment sending young people to their deaths against her. Oz points out that that’s exactly why she went to him, because she could make him believe this was the right way, that it would bring him closure. It’s what Ozpin deserves, Hazel argues, and Oz does not disagree. But does Oscar deserve it? Do the innocent people who haven’t been affected by Salem or Ozpin yet?  No, this isn’t for justice, this is personal. Because Salem said it would help Hazel. Has it?

We don’t get an answer to that, instead going back up to Weiss’ room in Schnee Manor where she’s reapplying Nora’s bandages. Still mostly unconscious, Nora mutters “Now what... am I good for?” I can think of a great many things Nora is useful for outside of her great strength and straightforward approach to combat, but its a damn shame no one has actually bothered to tell her that before now. Before Weiss has a chance to offer any, Blake and Ruby enter the room with cups of tea. I’m not ashamed to admit I initially thought they were hot chocolate cuz I’m not used to tea being that sort of amber color. Weiss admits that she’s done the most her limited medical knowledge can offer, and Nora needs more than that. Blake expresses her concern for the other half of their group, but almost slips up and says... well we’re just not sure, but we like to assume she was gonna say she’s especially worried for someone in particular. The shippers can fill that in how they like. Their moping is interrupted by May entering the room with some less than stellar news from Fiona and the others down in Mantle. They haven’t seen Yang’s team in a while, and with everything going to hell like this a search party is at the bottom of the priority list. She’s about ready to get back on the airship and head back down to Mantle, but Weiss protests and this sparks a debate. May points out that Mantle doesn’t have the luxury of the Atlas military protecting them so Ruby’s group and the Happy Huntresses are the only thing keeping the people safe from the chaos of the invasion, but Weiss argues that there are still people suffering up her and I have to agree. Just because a police force is around doesn’t automatically mean they’re doing the best job of keeping everyone safe. But Weiss pushes the wrong button by asking about May’s family. The Marigold’s were ashamed of the way their “son” acted, wanting to help the suffering down in Mantle. And so May would no longer let herself be called that, she became a woman proudly working as part of the Happy Huntresses for the service of the people. She kicked her Marigold name and reputation to the curb and her cousin Henry stepped up as the socialite snob instead. 

This cannot have been an easy scene for Kdin to record, but we all need to give a standing ovation for her performance in it. Powerful words that likely hit very close to home. What a queen.

May is sure Weiss gets where she’s coming from with their families casting them aside in favor of a more obedient heir, her being replaced by Whitley after her outburst at the charity concert. Weiss wants to voice her disagreement, but May questions whose side she’s on in all this. Blake doesn’t like that, they’ve heard this talk about taking sides before and judging by her tone she’s none too happy to be hearing it now. May is about to give her a strongly worded piece of her mind too but Ruby stands between them to remind everyone there are no sides. All of humanity needs to be united, and Salem is the one creating the tension that’s dividing them so their real enemy is her. The only question now is how do they get out of this problem? The solution might be hiding just around the corner, literally. Whitley has been listening from behind the door, and he seems a little inspired.

Meanwhile Oz seems to have just finished telling Salem’s dark cursed backstory to Hazel, and it seems her final plan really is to have the world so divided and ruined that when the gods are brought back to judge it they will deem Remnant a failure and destroy it and hopefully her with it. Hazel seems less than inclined to believe this story though, he still holds a damn hard grudge over his sister. Oz is getting nowhere so Oscar asks to be put back in the lead, and so he is just as Hazel is about to wallop them again. Oz is willing to trust him so he can earn Hazel’s trust in return. So he goes right ahead and tells the big guy Jinn’s name and that it’s how you summon her for one last question. Hazel seems mad that Oscar gave up the info so effortlessly after all that, but Oscar asserts that he’s not telling Salem. He’s telling Hazel, and letting him decide what to do with the knowledge and the chance to gain deeper knowledge still. Pretty rad strategy. Wouldn’t you know it though, Emerald is still listening outside the door and heard everything. She goes to tell Mercury, but he’s busy packing a duffel bag for a trip to Vacuo. Guess Salem doesn’t need him here right now so we’ll get to see him again in Volume 9 or 10. He’s less than convinced that they should try and use this behind the scenes knowledge to go against Salem, cuz if Hazel couldn’t do it then why would he change his tune now? And why would they risk their necks too? It’s not like Oz was telling the truth, right? Salem isn’t really gonna destroy the world! But the teens get another surprise lecture from Uncle Tyrian: Of course Salem plans to destroy Remnant!! You couldn’t tell from the start? Everything about her screams end of the world, and it is beautiful! And if you thought she’d do anything different then you must really be crazy... Bold worlds from a psychotic serial killer, but we already know he’s unhinged. Mercury doesn’t much like getting this rude awakening though, especially since Tyrian will be the one going with him to Vacuo. Merc and Em share one last sad look, but he’s made his bed and now he’s resigned to lie in it. Bye bye Mercury, see you after Emerald has probably switched sides and will have to face you as an enemy...

Speaking of ships soaring through the air, we go back to the Ace Ops and YJR heading for Monstra. Yang is protesting the bombing plan since Oscar is still inside, but Vine insists they can’t afford to wait and risk further death and destruction. Jaune offers a side plan, send the three inside Monstra ahead of the bombing squad to scope things out for them and try to rescue Oscar while they’re doing recon. Marrow is shocked that they’d be willing to go into the literal belly of the beast alone, but Yang asserts he’d do the same for one of his teammates if they were in this position, right? He doesn’t have an answer for that. Elm argues that trading their lives just for one other person is stupid, but amazingly it is Ren who objects. Oscar is their friend, and they will do whatever it takes for someone they care about like that. A real turnaround from his attitude of closing himself off emotionally, but I guess he’s realizing how ridiculous it sounds coming from other people? Harriet gets out of her seat to do what she does best and start talking down to someone as naïve and wrong. Feelings are stupid, the job is what matters. When you lose someone you just replace them and forget about them. We find out that Winter is indeed meant to be the new leader instead of Clover, and before Marrow there was apparently a member of the team named Tortuga, but Ren is not about to let anyone tell him that someone is replaceable. You don’t say that to Team JNPR, and we definitely don’t say that about Ren... Not now. In his outrage, Ren suddenly finds... clarity. He starts seeing the world a little differently. In less cryptic terms, his Semblance seems to have evolved and he now sees people’s emotions swirling around them as colorful bursts of flower petals. Harriet is actually furious about losing Clover, she’s lying to herself and trying to suppress her feelings. She does not like being called out like that, but the rest of the squad needs to be put on blast. As opposed to Hare’s red petals Marrow is surrounded by blue that I guess would mean sadness or depression, Elm has orange and some red, and Vine is clouded with green. The meanings of the last two are a little less clear, but they’re all definitely feeling some strong things that they’re trying to hide under a calm façade. This is the reason the Ace Ops lost to RWBY, they’re all held back by trying not to connect with each other so unity and team bonds never formed. Elm does not like being told she’s a loser because she won’t make friends, but at least it’s a a reaction, which means he’s absolutely right. She’s about to deck Ren in the face but Winter steps in to get everyone calmed down. She looks these three “fugitives” over, and makes a decision. She’s going to trust her sister’s friends. They will get the teens in close and give them a small window of time to try and get in and out before the Ace Ops need to bring in the payload and blow it all away. Harriet is pissed Winter is giving these “traitors” a chance, and questions her decision thusly. But you’re outranked, you boob, and you can’t do a damn thing to stop her from showing human decency. They have a very tight schedule to attempt this rescue, and Jaune accepts that fully. The three get uncuffed and are given their weapons back as the ship lands at the front lines. Ren tries to appeal to the doubt and regret he can see in Marrow to get him to switch sides while the getting’s good. Marrow wants to, but he sticks to the job for now. Yang and Jaune head out first, while Ren lingers to tell Winter he knows she doesn’t want to be a part of all this anymore either, and we see a rainbow of many emotional petals around her head. Either she has a balance of many emotions in check and is the most levelheaded of the Ace Ops, or she has the most emotions repressed and her mind is a tempest of feelings that aren’t being addressed and may spell her end... take your pick.

As this militant Schnee considers her options, we go homeward to see Weiss and the others heading for the front door. May isn’t keen to stay her any longer than needed, and the kids need to make a choice about where she’s dropping them off. Either they go to the front lines here in Atlas or back down to Mantle to help with the chaos there. No other options, and especially no breaking their jailbirds out for an assist. May doesn’t have the optimism and heroic hope that Ruby still holds dear, she won’t entertain the idea that this can become a complete victory all around. This isn’t that kind of world. Either they help one place, or they help another. And even then, that’s no guarantee wherever they go will be successful at stopping the invasion. It’s very depressing, and it’s on these kids to accept the facts and make the hard decisions. If you take a look at the last few Volumes, Ruby does seem to have a bit of a habit of ignoring the dreadful possibilities/facts in favor of pursuing a hopeful and bold plan that could fix everything immediately so she doesn’t have to cope with reality and actually grieve her mistakes and losses... I’m not saying it makes her a bad character or that she’s wholly wrong for trying to see a bright side whenever possible, just that this is an unhealthy strategy for a leader with so much on her shoulders. But before anyone has time to make a decision right now, there’s a hard knock on the front door. Everyone draws their weapons and approaches slowly, before Weiss cautiously opens the door. In a most definitely welcome surprise, she is greeted by Klein!!! She missed him dearly, and apologizes for whatever fault she had in his being fired, but while cycling through personalities he assures her she has nothing to be sorry for since it’s all Jacques’ fault, the bastard. Turns out, Klein is here to use his medical knowledge to treat Nora. What, didn’t you know all butlers to heroic millionaires have field medic training? Alfred Pennyworth set the gold standard, I dare say~ But of course, Weiss didn’t call him and none of her friends know his number so who told him to come?... Would you believe it, Whitley is responsible and we could not be more proud of him! Weiss certainly is, and she gives him what might be his first genuinely loving hug in years. Klein heads upstairs to begin treatment, while the rest of the group share a hopeful moment. But this silence too comes to a crashing halt as there is further ruckus outside. This time Ruby answers the door, to see a smoking crater in the front driveway. RWB rush outside and kneel at the edge of the crater as the smoke clears. Penny has crash landed, and lies there in a pool of what we can only presume to be her green synthetic blood. All she has the strength left to do is apologize before she passes out and the screen darkens with her. There lies the end for the next 6 weeks, and we were left to panic and speculate all the while. Too bad I’m a lazy bugger who only got this review out now and there’s no tension left before the thrilling continuation comes tomorrow morning. So lets all get one last panicked sleep in before the living nightmares come for our girls! Penny is totally gonna be under Watt’s control, the Hound is coming, it’s all gonna be a huge damn mess... Can’t wait, can you?~

[schiste-argileux]

Idw Prowl is an evil SOB (took him two years to send the Wreckers to Garrus-9 and help Maxy (who was protecting all the war crimes the Bots did), put Maxy’s torturer and a war criminal on board the Lost Light cuz why not, sent Pharma to Delphi knowing it was DJD territory)

Prowl... Prowl’s creation and competence in his area of work is astounding. He is brilliant, creative, and defiantly apathetic of this world. But, he is very human in his own way. IDW Prowl is selfish, yet not. He is a unique in that aspect because most people make decisions like his for the sole reason of benefiting themselves. But Prowl’s sole reason of existing is to create PEACE. 

Peace. Peace can only be done when people are complacent, happy, and satisfied. When things are stationary. Stable. 

But life is never stable. Elements desire to form bonds, yet are almost always leaning towards to instability... Prowl’s form of PEACE is a world where there is no fighting. But everything sentient requires to fulfill its desires. As long as there is desire, people will fight. 

A world of PEACE would be a world of full control, there are no surprises, no change. Safety, routines, and constants. No creativity, no development... nothing. stagnant. 

But I must admire Prowl’s tenacity and dedication to this world! 

He sacrifices everything for the sake of the directive, preserve cybertron, PEACE. He sacrifices his morals (Robot Gets Bullied By a Human), his dignity (Recent News, Cop Accepts Orgy For The Means of Establishing Peace, his body (Recent News, Cop gets Molested by A Spider for The Autobot Cause), and of course, thousands of lives (Not Recent News). :D Prowl respects and understands that there will always be chaos and instability, and he is so very flexible around it all! He literally can maximize everything and anything he has. He is the embodiment of consequentialism with a lil dash of politics. I wish my group project members were 1% as productive as him! Prowl tries to put everything black and white, and he gets upset when things get far more tricky, and wants to get everything in control so people can stay safe and remain in peace and not fight! And that’s a respectable goal! Control can be good, it means one understands and is able to retain themselves and the thing they are controlling. But Prowl doesn’t want to accept that there are things out of his control. And Prowl likes to think he’s justified when he controls the uncontrollable. 

I mean, yeah, if he didn’t do what he did, the autobots would have been six feet under A LOT EARLIER. Optimus is not a good leader, preserving organic life over his own soldiers? Psh. Look at Spike, he’s got valid points and can I understand why he left the ‘bots. Prowl’s probably thinking everyday, DAMN, OP, WHY R U SO DUMB. LISTEN WE NEED TO FEED OUR SOLDIERS AND PRIORITIZE OUR SPECIES LIVES INSTEAD OF THIS FUCKING CARBON BASED CIRCLE. HELLO??? And literally Prowl could have been like I’m gonna get ya assassinated so I CAN HAVE IT MY WAY. But Prowl was BORN for the RULES. To follow, to MAKE PEACE. Killing the prime figurehead is against that, even if it would make his life way easier! (hence, not that selfish and also sad that your life is the rules. That’s a short leash, but he makes due)

Honestly I feel bad for Prowl. Must suck to be so big brain that everyone hates you when you say the truths (but also you could learn some more tricks from Jazz to be nicer and hide the truth, but that’s scary because a nicer prowl means more people he can trick and use. Thanks Prowl for being so straightforward! Now people can avoid you easier). He's so straightforward about things that need to be done, he’s in constant denial about the grey area of life!

That’s why when Spike slapped Prowl with reality slaps, Prowl lost some of his shit. Remember, nearly everyone had the edgy depressed time in their teens or young adult years where you realize the world is truly unfair and nothing is black and white? Yeah. Slap that on a 6+ million year old robot with a battle computer and is capable of big brain CPU-age, and was literally built for the sole purpose of enforcing rules and making peace? And no one really cared about Prowl enough to understand him and his background. So Prowl goes through his angst moment alone with his huge titties, frustrated. THIS. IS. WHY. YOU. COMMUNICATE. YA DINGUS. 

Prowl doesn’t become a school shooter like Pharma cuz hes got bigger brain and a lot more power and control over himself, but he literally becomes Shadow The Hedgehog (Even if the world’s against me I’ll fight like I’ve always have). HE’S GONE ROGUE. MA’AM, SIR, THE FUCKING OREO COOKIE HAS TRANSFORMED AND ROLLED OUT.  like. OP was the one thing holding prowl back, which was good! But now prowl’s on the roll and bumblebee is too nice and passive to hold him back. + the bombshell brainwash? feels so bad. being prowl sucks. because Prowl is a necessary evil. 

At least he’s wonderfully blunt about his goal to create a peaceful cybertron, which makes it easier if you want to avoid him or smth. meanwhile you have fake people IRL that smile their way through and then slit your throat and you won’t even know it was them (hey jazz, no offense, but that’s what spec ops does). Fakers are the scariest enemy, but Prowl is still a threat, just not as big as a someone who fluffs you up on a balloon and then pops it. Prowl would just be like, hey, you’re really useful, come over here in my white van i wanna show you something and then maybe you get destroyed. But hey! You were the one with the highest chance of surviving compared to other people! Isn’t that great? You’re so skilled WOW. (Prowl gets punched. Again!) Prowl represents the necessary evil in society. We WILL ALWAYS HAVE EVIL people in this world. But Prowl is a far better evil than people who do evil for their own selfish reasons. It’s like how we have law enforcers and politicians . It’s basically giving them legal rights to do illegal things (lmao). BUT we need them regardless. We need those people to get their hands dirty, possibly killed, so that people can live in innocence and peace. 

I don’t think Prowl ever realized that he was a necessary evil, and when Spike showed him that, he was bitter. But he accepted it. Which I respect because most people can’t be bothered to understand themselves and just throw themselves in denial, and point fingers for their flaws. Prowl sucks up and understands who he is, and he makes the best of it to achieve his goal.  I mean, honestly? Prowl is probably a miracle worker. Not in a Ratchet sense. But look at the way modern governments run, nothing gets done, everything is stalled because no one has the guts to make sacrifices. Prowl would have gotten a shit ton of things done, man, and take quick efficient action. Even if he sacrifices many things for it.  (Warning. I do not condone any taking of lives, NO ONE has the right to judge whenever a person should live or die.)  Prowl reminds me of 秦始皇 (Qin Shi Huang), the king who unified China and sacrificed millions to make the Great Wall, canals, and road systems that last to this day. If it wasn’t for these accomplishments, China wouldn’t have been what it is today. Was it a good thing? For the future residents of China? Hell yeah. But the costs? Those are sins that can never be erased, and they are horrible and shouldn't be done ever again. Was it necessary? Perhaps. But that’s another discussion. Is Prowl evil? Depends on your definition of evil. Perhaps he’s justified, perhaps in his world, he’ll go down as the Qin Shi Huang of the Cybertronians. Regardless, Prowl like Pharma, is an EXCELLENT example to study on public ethics, and administrative officials should analyze him and learn from his mistakes and sins.  I think Prowl is not evil in a sense that he wishes to harm others, but evil in a sense of his apathy. Prowl is a necessary component to a functional society (someone to plot, to use people, to enforce rules even if some are sacrificed, someone who can get their hands dirty). He lives a terrible and sad fate, and I do not wish ANYONE to live a life like Prowl’s or look up to Prowl. Yes, he’s so clever and brilliant, but that kind of power will make you the loneliest person on Earth.

Thanks Prowl for taking the entire load of sin on your shoulders! Big MVP! You get nothing from the world except hate and contempt.  I would go on about him more but I have IRL stuff to do. I love Prowl as an example to tell people that MODERATION. COMMUNICATION. AND COMPASSION are important factors to have a healthy and good mental state. Prowl is the perfect example of someone who doesn’t want to empathize (haha so many people are like this today), who doesn’t want to try to use more braincells and friends help to make better plans that are more moderate and not extreme, and who doesn’t want to talk to anyone thinking its a waste of time or have difficulty explaining things.  BUT I LOVE G1 PROWL because he has far more patience and manners, and doesn’t take a darker, route for his goals. awhohdohd he’s baby,,, i wish all cops had patience and manners and in general open-minded yet cautious enough not to be taken advantage of,,,, perhaps then we wouldn’t have so much polarization and fighting with authority in this world.... 

uwuwwuwuwuw they did prowl so dirty in idw WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ;____;   Again, you are welcome to disagree or agree! I wrote this really quickly so I’m sure there will be points that could be clarified or edited. Prowl’s really complicated and I do not like to talk about current IRL problems, but Prowl represents a lot of problems in society. And I think it’s critical if we try to look at both perspectives to get an understanding on WHY people do these things, and is there a solution to AVOID making those same mistakes? There’s a couple of controversial things in this short essay I wrote, esp. about cops IRL. So feel free to have at it! Or ignore it! Whichever is more comfortable for you! Thanks for coming to my ted talk! Again, Prowl is a bad influence and a sorrowful life to live. please do not try to be like prowl. xD I won’t intrude on you if you do, because you have a right to live the life you want as long as you’re not hurting other people’s interests and wellbeing! 

[animegenork]

Fruits Basket Season 2 Episodes 21-25

So obviously life happened and I never finished out season 2 with my not-so-reflective analyses of the Fruits Basket episodes. Well, season 3 has officially started (and this is the one time in my life I waited for the sub before watching it) and it’s about damn time I did this.

Hold on to your pants--

Episode 21

I would like to make it very clear that Baby Yuki is Baby and most be protected at all costs. With that in mind, let’s begin.

The episode starts with Yuki meeting Akito for the first time, back before he became a mess and way before he ever met Tohru. There is already an internal conflict here with what he wants versus what the zodiac spirit wants, and that is to see Akito. Due to the “God” role Akito plays, Yuki wants to see Akito... but Yuki himself knows deep down that he does not.

We see Yuki spending more and more time with Akito, which makes sense, since we’ve known for a while that they were “friends” of the childhood sort. Perhaps new information is Shigure comforting Akito whenever he was upset, but that’s not important to the storyline at hand. Everything was all fine and dandy until, Yuki notes, Akito became twisted.

This is where it starts to get bad for Yuki.

Sometime during the latest tantrum, Akito begins turning his inward self-hatred to Yuki, telling him that the Rat is hated and no one wants him. Of course, we’ve seen similar poison towards Kyo, and frankly, I’ve always loved this juxtaposition toward them. Kyo and Yuki’s zodiac spirits are hated in similar ways, and while they hate each other superficially because of this, they also hate themselves more than anyone else. Both of them have remained on the “fringes” of things for most of their entire lives, which is probably why we get to see more of them than really any other zodiac member.

Naturally, this causes young Yuki to seek Kyo out when he hears about someone else who’s on the outside looking in. They meet, and Yuki’s all gung ho to try to make a friend. Unfortunately, Kyo has seen his own shit and is convinced Yuki is to blame for his suffering. So he tells Yuki he should just disappear from this world.

[A moment to cry over Baby Yuki’s expression. *sob*]

As most children do when faced with something awful like that, Yuki goes to his mother for comfort. Instead, she slaps him. (I just really hate her.) This leads into a scene of Akito spouting his usual poison at Yuki, brainwashing him into thinking everything is hopeless and bleak and that he’d be better off not going outside (to paraphrase). It doesn’t help that when he reaches out to his brother, or to anyone else really, he’s rejected. So, really, it’s no wonder he became such a mess, when the whole world has been working against him from the beginning.

Following this, we get to see Yuki going to school and attempting normalcy, even making some friends. Of course, we all know how that turns out, because Yuki has told us before: his friends’ memories were erased when his curse was revealed. Props to Hatori, I guess, for not succumbing to Baby Yuki’s cuteness when he begged the older boy not to do it.

Yuki reveals, in another interaction with Kyo in which our resident cat boy refuses to take back his hat because Yuki touched it (while I can’t blame him, I’ll always be a little mad at Kyo), that he really just wanted a home. A place where he was happy. Even Kyo had friends and a foster father, despite any verbal abuse launched his way.

When he falls ill, Akito tells Yuki more about Kyo, heartbroken over the loss of his mother and swearing that he’ll kill the Rat and make amends. If possible, Yuki falls into a greater despair and decides to run away, donning the hat that once belonged to Kyo. In a way, this is where we see Yuki’s selfless side, which has always been there--he ran away in order to alleviate some of Kyo’s sadness, which he believes he caused.

GIVE. THIS BOY. A HUG.

So he runs and runs until he finds a woman talking to the police. Her daughter is lost. Now, obviously this is Kyoko--who else could it be--but Yuki doesn’t know that. However, he had seen a little girl crying somewhere and went to find her again. The girl, our lovely Tohru, follows him when he tries to go find Kyoko again to tell her, so he begins to lead her home. When they get there, before they can meet or hug or anything that would put her in danger, he gives her the hat and runs away.

Thus endeth the story of Tohru’s “prince.”

In some ways, this one event helped alleviate some of Yuki’s pain. He was useless and needed. He’d helped someone feel better. That can be the best feeling in the world for someone like Yuki.

Now, the funniest part about all this is Yuki was caught up in a memory. He’s not telling Kakeru any of this. Kakeru himself is a little weird, so he’s not terribly surprised. Yuki finally explains that he met Tohru once and didn’t realize that he had until sometime after they met again. Through her influence, Yuki decided to perservere, as he says, and keep trying to live for himself. Unfortunately, Akito’s influence is strong as well. He became twisted once more.

Poor Yuki. All this time, he wanted that stupid Cat to be his friend. That is one of the most interesting revelations, I think, that we ever see in Fruits Basket. I don’t think we ever find out if Kyo feels similarly, but the fact that Yuki, the one always insulting Kyo, just wanted to be friends is him, is somehow mind-blowing.

Then in comes Tohru again. She was there for him, time and time again. “She accepted me time and time again.” And really, that was all he ever wanted. To be accepted. To have someone care and give a shit. “Like how the sky feels so close, yet so far.”

“Like a mother.”

So, yes, folks, that’s the truth of it: Yuki sees Tohru as the mother he never had. I feel like for some this isn’t the type of truth you ever wanted to see, but here’s the important part to remember: for Yuki, romance wasn’t entirely important. He needed a parent. Someone to care for him. And Tohru gave him that time and time again. Perhaps, at one point, his feelings skewed toward the romantic, but over time, he realized that Tohru wasn’t that for him. She was something he needed much more.

Kyo has his father. Yuki has his Tohru.

And that’s all I’m going to say on that. Because the rest is a matter of what you think.

Episode 22

Y’all forgive me it’s so hard to find gifs months after the episodes air a;lsjdkf;ajsdfas this gif is NOT mine

Hi, I love Kyo.

Anyway.

We pick up right where we left off with the series-changing revelation that Yuki considers Tohru to be his mother. Kakeru is the voice of “lol what do you mean she’s our age”. Yuki explains that he’d always yearned for a parent’s love (haha it’s like I knew that) and valued Tohru’s care so much that it just seemed natural to consider her that way. His inner monologue realizes that’s what Rin was looking for, too.

And like I said before, it takes him a while to realize this is the particular feeling he had prescribed to Tohru. It started when she went after Kyo, the night we see his true form. Of course, as with all the zodiac members, he probably hadn’t been able to put voice to the feeling just yet. It happens. But he even admits that he tried to be romantic with her, but eventually, it just felt too wrong to do. I get it, since I have a friend I consider my father, and when people told us we looked like a couple, we were grossed out beyond belief. So yeah. Makes sense.

Kakeru goes, “Well people look for romance with people like their mom all the time.” First of all, Kakeru, Tohru is nothing like Yuki’s mother. Okay. Second of all, Yuki clarifies that he doesn’t see her as a woman. But Kyo does. The Cat always knew how he felt about her. And you can see the same feeling radiating from Tohru.

*sobs* Okay. Sorry.

Yuki resolves to live on, spurred on by Tohru’s encouragement and love. Kakeru responds by throwing a soccer ball at his face.

I’ve mentioned before I love their relationship, right?

Shenanigans ensue, and Yuki says he might be able to tell Tohru precisely what he told Kakeru, but not right now.

BACK TO THE PLAY! Tohru is attempting to memorize her lines, and Shigure finds out Kyo is the Prince. This angers Kyo, naturally, because no way in hell does he want that Dog to embarrass him. He confiscates Tohru’s script (I cackled at this part) and tells her not to tell Shisho (but she obviously did already). Basically, we get some unintentional flirting between these two until Yuki cuts in using the classic Fruits Basket slapstick.

Yuki tells Kyo that Tohru has the hat in a moment of just sheer understanding passing between them, and Kyo goes to his room to sulk. Cuz Kyo.

A lot of what happens next is pretty self-explanatory: Ayame is Ayame, Yuki is the resigned brother, Tohru can’t play an evil stepsister to save her life, yada yada. The class eventually decides to rewrite the play because obviously a non-evil stepsister ain’t gonna work. Kyo is nowhere to be found. Tohru offers to find him, but Yuki takes over.

Ah, yes. The classic.

Here we see a classic rival clash, but it’s not physical. It’s verbal. Yuki’s very good at putting on a certain face in front of Kyo, but it’s always when Kyo needs it most. Kyo yells that Yuki has his parents. He’s loved and praised. What it all boils down to is that Kyo doesn’t think he’s worthy of being a prince. That’s always been Yuki’s crown to wear. It’s a case of the simplest thing triggering a much deeper emotion. Kyo claims Yuki doesn’t understand, but we all know that’s not the case at all. Yuki understands all too well. So Yuki asks if he really wants to achieve this impossible thing (defeating the Rat), if he really wants to not have anyone to hate.

Kyo punches a window.

We have a brief scene of Machi coming by and saying something about Yuki not being a prince. While the other classmate with her is appalled, Yuki is just stunned. Because that’s probably exactly what he’s wanted to hear all these years. (Go Machi!)

Returning to the classroom, Kyo finds the ever-cheerful Tohru with the revised Cinderella. As she babbles about how he’ll probably be able to do the play better this time around, he reflects on Yuki finding him sulking. Tohru notices his injured hand, and he just leans on her. He’s very good at this, I’ve noticed. The leaning. Makes my heart pound every time. And clearly, it worked on Tohru, too.

Kyo tells her she better not laugh at his performance, and they go home.

And scene.

Episode 23

To be frank, this episode doesn’t need much analysis. It’s mostly comedy and shenanigans and everything one could love about Fruits Basket.

Also, woof. Kyo with long hair.

We’ve got a narrator telling the classic Cinderella while the play goes in an entirely different direction. Cinderella Hanajima loves her Stepsister Tohru deeply but fears the prince taking her away. (Oh wait this is an allegory or something isn’t it.)

Flash forward to the ball, Prince Kyo wants nothing to do with all of this, and Buddy Uotani is telling him to get the hell up. Kyo doesn’t budge, refusing to dance with anyone, until, of course, Tohru approaches. He wigs out, because that’s what Kyo does, and tries to call her back. It’s almost like he forgets this is a play or something as he deflates from rejecting Tohru.

Cinderella arrives, she and Kyo clash, she leaves, wishing she’d eaten more meat. Naturally, a glass slipper is left behind. Kyo says he doesn’t really want to go find the girl, and Uotani begins the second most important scene of the episode.

With passionate urging, Uotani tells Kyo not to waste this chance to see her, saying that some people don’t get to see the people they want to. Then she screams, “COME SEE ME, DAMMIT” and we all know that’s aimed at Kureno.

We got to the classic glass slipper scene, and Hanajima enters and pulls quite the badass move. She asks Kyo if he plans on deceiving himself forever and keeping himself locked away. Most of the audience doesn’t really know that she’s referring to his feelings for Tohru and, to us the viewer, the way he’s going to willingly give up his freedom after high school ends.

Kyo: “So what if I do? Does that hurt anyone else?”

Tohru knows precisely what conversation is happening, and she starts to say that she doesn’t want to lose him. But, being Tohru, she’s not quite able to put it into words. But Kyo picks up on this, and he’s taken off guard. He’s an idiot, not picking up on her feelings for him in their entirety despite all the hints thrown his way. Even Momiji and Kisa know what’s going on here.

Awkwardness ensues, Yuki swoops in and tells Kyo to make his wish come true on his own in a classic “Broheim you better FUGGIN do it YOU HEAR ME” way.

The play ends, we see Shisho, Kyo tells him not to get married (because Hanajima is swooping in), and we find out Haru told him about the play. Obligatory reference to shirtless Kyo. Shisho picks up on Kyo’s conflicted feelings about Tohru while Kyo tells himself Tohru probably wasn’t trying to say what he thought she was.

Shenanigans ensue again, this time with Haru and Hiro, which is pretty funny, and then we check in on Yuki and Kakeru, who see Machi getting bullied. Petty girls being petty about a girl who’s not petty. How petty. Machi makes it clear that she thinks Yuki’s an airhead (which hits him like a brick LOLLLL) and then she says he seems lonely. That gives him pause, because she picked up on the one thing no one else at the school (besides other Sohmas and Tohru) have picked up on. She’s amazing like that.

BACK TO KYO I LOVE HIM. He meets up with Tohru and they start walking together. At the exact same time, they tell themselves that it couldn’t be, the other doesn’t have feelings for them. “I won’t let myself think it.”

And they break their own hearts in the process.

Pardon me, I have to sob again.

Episode 24

Once again, the gif is not mine. Apologies, y’all, I’m bad at this.

MACHI TIME!

The student council is going out to party--er, not really party, but just have lunch, I guess. Machi doesn’t really want to come, and Yuki tries to get her opinion on things so they can make everything more amenable. She tells him he doesn’t need to make such a fuss, that her opinions aren’t his concern. He says she’s right, and that he just wants to see the world through her eyes.

Does he REALIZE when he does that??? Probably not.

Anyway, everyone goes home, Yuki and Kakeru are THEM at its finest, and Machi goes home. Her mother calls, and we see a little bit of her past, where her mother pressured her to be better than Kakeru at everything. This suppressed her personality to a point of what her mother calls dullness. And Machi agrees. She knows she’s dull, that she struggled to make people happy, only to be abandoned and left an empty shell. 

She then reflects on how Yuki’s changed. Even when he smiled before, it seemed lonely, not genuine. But now he’s changing to smile for real. While he’s changed, she’s remained stagnant.

Machi ends up going to the student council gathering, reflecting on how she’s not sure if she means something to the world. She’s stopped in her tracks by Yuki calling out to her, saying he’s glad she came. And she drops everything.

What happens next is typical rom com. Yuki notices she kept the maple leaf and says he’s happy, Machi yells that there wasn’t any special reason behind her keeping it. Understandably, Yuki is confused. Kakeru makes her embarrassment worse by popping in, but it’s a cute moment, because Yuki finally gets the answer to the question, “What’s your favorite color?” Because of course he remembered.

We cut over to Tohru, who’s staying with Shisho for New Year’s so she’s not lonely. Good call on the part of the Sohmas. Yuki and Shigure really just didn’t want to leave Kyo alone with Tohru, which is funny in itself since Kyo is a harmless kitty, but alas.

But they’re not alone with Shisho; Rin’s there! And Tohru goes in for a hug only to splat against the wall. Poor thing. We find out Rin and Kyo don’t exactly like each other, but they don’t dislike each other either. Very confusing, but I don’t question it.

We cut over to the banquet and a riveting shot of Hatori (fanservice for Hatori’s fanclub hehehehe) and we get some Ayame and Shigure shenanigans. I love them dearly, ridiculous as they are. We see Akito try to do the thing with Yuki again, saying he forgives him for his transgressions, and Yuki just says that he forgives Akito as well. He’s tired of blaming others, sick of it. He needs to move so he can change.

Akito sees something in his eyes, and she has a flashback to something involving Kureno. So he attacks, demanding Yuki apologize. The rest of the zodiac is stunned and confused. Ayame mobilizes to get Yuki some medical attention, and Hatori helps him out. Yuki takes a moment to apologize for blaming Hatori all those years for what happened when he was a kid. We see that Hatori felt indebted to Yuki for that as well and had resolved to keep an eye on him. They have a brotherly moment.

We see Tohru resolve to wish for the curse to be broken this year, and Momiji gives Kureno the DVD of the play where Uotani yells for him to see her. Haru goes to see Rin, who’s fallen asleep. Overall, Tohru says, she wishes for change.

Dun dun dun.

Episode 25

The plot thickens.

So we start off with Kureno and Akito, where Akito feels kinda sick after the episode with Yuki (episode as in incident, not---anyway). Kureno promises to stay by his side, and we immediately cut to Uo still missing him, but not saying so in so many words.

Tohru reflects on what happened during New Year’s, including Yuki coming back with a bandage on his forehead. He explains that he stood up to Akito, and he asks her if she thinks he did a good job. Now he’s just milking the mom thing, but she doesn’t seem to notice as she says yes.

Back to the present, we see that Shigure and Akito are fighting. He says something snarky about how Akito’s the one who’s always with Kureno, and Hatori treats this like it’s a childish argument. It is. Because Shigure’s a bit of a child. But it’s a bit deeper than that. They discuss how Kureno feels different than the rest of the zodiac, but they don’t say exactly what it is. That’s for later.

Kureno watches the DVD of the play, and he struggles with his feelings for Uo and his loyalty to Akito. He calls Shigure’s house and gets Shigure, and then we see Tohru come home and go right back out for an errand. She ends up at a park and sees some sparrows (AH YES, THE SYMBOLISM), and Kureno walks over to her, causing the sparrows to fly away.

What’s important here is to remember that members of the zodiac attract the animal they have the spirit of. We see it most often with Kyo and the cats. So why is Kureno chasing away the sparrows, the bird he turned into? Even Tohru is confused, until he hugs her and nothing happens.

That is to say, his curse is broken.

Kureno explains that he’s not sure how it happened--which disappoints Tohru, considering her quest to break the curse--only that it did. Now he’s resolved to stay by Akito’s side, meaning he can’t see Uotani anymore. He tries, unsuccessfully, to make himself feel better by saying that he doesn’t need to see her--their meetings were flukes. Then Tohru puts her hand on his face, and he admits that he fell in love with Uo.

And thus, we reach the crux of Kureno’s conflict: he’s free to do whatever he wants now, but because of that, he needs to stay by Akito’s side. And really, it’s because he can’t stand to see that child cry again over an ancient bond. He needs to be there for Akito, so that he can always be there and never abandon “that sorrowful girl.”

Tohru is shocked, and yet something seems to fall into place when she realizes Akito is a girl.

And that’s where the season ends.

~ ~ ~

That was a long boy, so sorry about that, folks! Now I’m off to finally watch the first episode of the new season! See y’all next time!

[nekoannie-chan]

Universus

Pairing: Brock Rumlow X Reader

Word count: 1777 words.

Summary: It seemed like a normal training day for you and Brock until Johnny came to ruin the day

Warnings: Angst, this is an Horror AU.

A/N: Universus means Universe.

This is my entry to the @star-spangled-beard-burn ‘s Season of Fiction Writing challenge 2020 with the fall prompt #1:

“I TOLD you I can’t do haunted houses”.

Also my entry to the @marvelgirlonamarvelworld ‘s Val’s 500 Writing challenge with the dialogue prompt #3:

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t the one who fucked us all up. What trouble did you get yourself into now, sweetiepie?”

And my entry to the @anika-ann ‘s 500 Celebration Challenge with the Arrow prompt #5:

“You tell anyone about this, I will kill you”.

“…That’s just an expression, right?”

Is a horror AU.

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistake please let me know and I will correct it.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics be posted in other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and is not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

My other media where I publish: Wattpad, Ao3, ffnet.

If you like it please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @navybrat817

You slipped and winced; Brock turned around and saw you on the floor, he went back to check if you were hurt.

“Are you okay?” He asked offering his hand to you.

"Yes, it's nothing, I just got distracted," you answered taking his hand and standing up with her help.

“Are you sure? You've had a lot of accidents and been distracted all week,” Brock commented with concern.

You dusted yourself off and looked at your boyfriend smiling.

"Come on, we've managed to survive that guy with the weird cloak and the girl who takes daggers out of her hands, as well as the group of weird kids who have a dinosaur."

"I still don't understand why they have a dinosaur," Brock questioned, putting a hand on his beard.

"After all we've been through, are there still things that surprise you?" You questioned incredulously.

"Not exactly, rather it surprises me that without having powers, I am still alive," he replied.

"That is because I’m healing all your wounds in the missions with my powers, but your destiny would probably be different if I didn’t do it," you agreed with satisfaction.

"Always so modest," he said wryly.

“Of course, well next time I won't heal you and I don’t know who’s gonna help you.”

"I don't think you will be so cruel ... are you?" He asked nervously.

"Challenge me and you will see," you threatened.

"You know I love you so much, right?" Brock replied, trying to sound friendly and approaching you.

"Don't even think about it," you stopped him by putting your hand on his chest.

"Don't be mad, babe, but as soon as the fair will be in the town, I will take you to the haunted house."

He got closer and started kissing your arm.

"Noooo, you know I hate haunted houses, let me," you said laughing, you knew what he was trying.

If you let him continue, he would achieve his goal and you could no longer pretend that you were upset with him, although obviously, at night you were going to take revenge. You saw the time and decided it was better to return to compound before they will start looking for them or they will find you in a "compromising" situation.

 Baxter Building

 Johnny saw the object in his hands, he had heard Ben talk about it, and obviously, Reed had created it, although he could not understand what it was for, he shook it a little, but nothing happened.

Maybe he could take it with Y/N and Wanda and see if they could find out what that item was doing or what it was for.

He immediately saved it and went to the compound, it would surely be a very fun visit, as long as the three of you were there you used to have many adventures.

 Compound

 "Hello ladies," Johnny said, entering to the place.

“What are you doing here?” Brock asked.

Johnny and Brock didn't get along at all since Brock thought Johnny liked you.

“What is that?” Wanda asked when she saw what Johnny was holding.

"I don't know, I found it in Reed's lab, but you two are very smart and I know you'll help me find out," Johnny replied, ignoring Brock.

"Well ... it seems ... something Reed is probably going to be very upset if he doesn't find it when he looks for it," you said.

“Oh come on! I don't think…!”

At that time the Multisect activated and everything went dark for a few seconds.

 Unknown place

 You opened your eyes confused, you felt stunned, you assumed that the others were too, you turned looking for the rest, who were lying in the place, you did not know where they were, and you did not even seem familiar.

“Is everyone okay?” Johnny asked, getting up.

“Where we are?” Brock asked sulkily, he was sure you were going to have problems.

"This place is very dingy," Wanda said scared.

"I just hope a madman with a machete or an electric saw doesn't show up and wants to kill us," you said.

"Well, Tinker Bell, take us back to the compound," Brock ordered.

"Yes, of course," Johnny muttered as he waved the Multisect.

You and Wanda exchanged glances, you knew Johnny, and so you would have to find another way to return to the compound… although perhaps you should first find out where you were. Johnny seemed nervous, he didn't know how said object worked.

“Well, well, well. If it isn't the one who fucked us all up. What trouble did you get yourself into now, sweetie pie? ”

“Brock, this is not the time for sarcasm, we must find out where we are supposed to be and, above all, how to return to the compound…”

“Your idiot friend brought us who knows where, we have no weapons apart from those we carry for training, or anything to defend ourselves as we know, we will have to improvise and worst of all, we have not the slightest idea of what the ground, ”Brock interrupted.

"We have Wanda who has powers, Johnny has powers, I have powers, we will be fine, and apart from that is what training is for, right?"

Brock growled disgruntled, he did not like what was happening at all, of course, he could have hand-to-hand combat, which was his speciality, but he knew well that for some things, having some kind of power was more effective and weapons they were a great help too.

“Johnny please, don't lose that thing, I don't care if Reed scolds you, but we surely need it to return home…”

You heard a sound nearby as if someone was dragging chains and stepping on leaves, the four of you put themselves in a position to defend yourselves if necessary.

“What was that?” You asked scared in a whisper.

"I think your question is rather where we are?" Wanda corrected.

"We have two options, or we stay here like idiots while Tinkerbell tries to fix that shit or we start walking to find a way out, obviously we shouldn't separate," Brock suggested.

You turned to see Johnny, who smiled nervously.

"I don't know how it works," he admitted.

Brock sighed exasperated, you would have to walk without knowing what dangers there were.

"I don't know who is more useless if this one or Rogers, although at the moment I think we already have a winner," Brock mumbled.

“Then what do we do? “You asked.

Johnny pushed himself to be able to fly, however, it did not work, just as Wanda tried to use her powers creating a field, there was no success either.

"Okay, we are screwed, I think we will have to walk to get to the highway ... or somewhere that can bring us closer to a populated area, maybe there we can get a phone to call the others and come for us," you said while you were looking for the compass in your pockets.

Once you found it, you started walking towards where the compass indicated that it was the north, Wanda took your hand to try to control the fear that both of you felt, Brock had an angry and Johnny tried to make a flame appear in his fingers.

The forest seemed huge and endless, you lost track of time, you no longer knew if you walked for hours or minutes, each time the place became gloomier.

“Are you sure it's the right way? “Wanda questioned.

"I don't know, I don't even know where we are, I'm just following where the compass tells me its north," you replied.

Suddenly Brock stopped them, you looked at him asking for explanations; however, he put a finger to his mouth to silence everyone, you hid behind a huge tree.

A group of people with masks passed by, it seemed that they had some hostages that they were taking somewhere.

"We should help them," you whisper.

"We cannot care about others."

"Although I never liked him, your boyfriend is right," Johnny said.

you began to walk slowly so as not to attract attention and to run away when you were far enough they ran into another guy wearing another mask, so Brock and you shot him, you did no harm him, he began to chase you, you separated into two groups, you and Brock, Wanda and Johnny, without realizing it.

After you made sure you weren't chasing them anymore, you stopped, turned around looking for your friends while trying to catch your breath.

"Brock ... where are Wanda and Johnny?" You asked raggedly.

"I don't know ... I thought they were coming after us."

“Do we look for them or what do we do?”

"First, not to separate, second, we have to walk trying to avoid those damned fools and find them."

You held hands and began to walk, it was difficult to determine if you had already walked through the place or not, at times you had to run again when you were being chased.

"I TOLD you I can't do haunted houses".

"This is not a damn haunted house, it is a fuckin’ haunted forest," Brock replied.

"Anyway, Brock, I'm seriously scared, we must find Wanda and Johnny," you whimpered.

You were surrounded, it seemed that there was no escape, you tried to run until you ended up crashing into the other couple.

“Are you okay?” Wanda asked terrified.

“We are still alive, but I don't know how long…”

Impulsively Johnny threw the Multisect at the attackers, which activated at the exact moment when it looked like they were going to attack you.

You saw the others without understanding, nobody knew how you came to the compound, and the only thing that mattered was that you were safe. You and Wanda hugged each other while Brock grabbed Johnny by the collar of his shirt to threaten him.

"You tell anyone about this, I will kill you."

"... That’s just an expression, right?"

"No jerk, I'm serious ..."

“Brock is enough, Johnny already learned the lesson, he is going to return the object to Reed's laboratory, right Johnny? “You broke in separating the men.

“Yeah, yeah, of course.

"You know what, we're going to go with Johnny," Wanda said.

You entered the laboratory and Johnny left the Multisect where he had found it, then you went to the hall and there you found Reed.

"Hi guys, haven't you seen my Multisect?" Reed asked.

“Your…what?”

“The Multisect, it serves to travel to other universes… you know, forget it, I don't want you to get into troubles.”

"Doctor Richards, if you knew ..." You spluttered as he left.

[dream-girls-evil]

Ratched: Episode 7 Reactions

Oh wait Hanover has a family??? A child?!

Ahh a classic case of a doctor married to his work

Oh no this is heartbreaking

Ahh and this is when he meets Lenore and Henry, pouring himself into this work

Huck!! The sweetest boy!!!

Ohhh does he like her?? Omg this is precious

I hope she’s honest with him about why she can’t. Cuz he’s so kind and accepting.

And this is the first time she’s really said this out loud to someone

Why couldn’t Dolly have fallen for Huck?

“Blowsy, alcoholic jazz baby” XD that is exactly what Louise is

Finally we’re back to this! Fuck is Betsy going to find out that they’re siblings?!

Oh FUCK SHE KEPT THE PRIEST’S TESTIMONY!!! YOU NEVER KEEP THE EVIDENCE!!!

Damn and Betsy not wasting any time confronting her about it! Everyone finding out her secrets!

Wait she...wants to help her? Is this gonna be actual help or like blackmail “we can benefit each other” help?

“Now I don’t know what I think he deserves” called it! Her conviction is wavering!

Betsy doesn’t think Edmund deserves the death penalty either? Now that’s a surprise. Ah well, I guess she’s got Hanover’s view on things.

Ooh was she discharged for killing that guy? Multiple men, I guess.

Betsy being so understanding is...weird. But I kinda get it? She really has seen Mildred be kind and caring and strong. She knows she’s far from a heartless killer.

Ooh Betsy has a plan? To save the hospital?

Ahh they’re trying to get full private funding, and maybe take over the hospital themselves? Remove Hanover from his position?

Oop Mildred didn’t share everything she knows about Hanover lol

Bucket’s shock is so funny XD that wasn’t on the list!!!

Make Huck head nurse!!! Give him a purpose!!!

So Mildred is definitely setting things up so that she can cut and run, with or without Edmund, when she needs to

Go Betsy go!!! I love her dismissing Hanover

“That’s why I’m letting you go” aw they kinda reconciled

He’s gonna know this is all because of Mildred tho

I bet Charlotte’s gonna regress

Yay racism

Something’s not right with Charlotte. Is she gonna die? Oh no oh no he put her in a closet. She’s gonna regress.

Oh fuuuuuuck and that’s the end of Hanover

Aw poor Charlotte. I’m glad she called Mildred. Mildred’s going to help.

This makes three patients they’ve literally just spirited away on buses or trains lol

How does Mildred know about the hospital in Mexico? I wonder if she’s planning on fleeing there herself

Getting lye for the body? Or a saw?

Oh hey lol now she can deliver his head after all

...I do have to wonder if Charlotte getting triggered and killing Hanover was the best-case scenario all along

Haha IN A HAT BOX

Lenore totally has a little bit of a thing for Mildred

Is Henry gonna kill her? He looks like he wants to kill her.

Dude literally how do you think this is going to work out for you? She’s the one who wipes your ass.

Louise must be so tired of people coming to visit Mildred 😂😂😂

Oh!! The social worker!!!

Justifiable homicide!!! GOOD.

Aw wow Mildred had been looking for him for so long

Hmm why do I feel like he’s not gonna be there when she shows up to get him?

I’m completely lost with the timeline here. How many years ago was this? Did he give her the slip to go kill the priests?

Haha we’re back to “doomed since conception”

Wait, did Mildred not know why Edmund killed the priests until now? That changes things.

Aaand here we go, Anna’s going to confirm to her that Edmund is a lost cause

Gwen’s going East. I wonder if she’ll go to Boston lol

Why the weird focus on her drinking the water? And why looking through this car window?

Okay it’s just Mildred watching from the car

Ooh they need to talk! So things are not all good between them.

Ah yeah Gwen’s pissed. And she’s right on the money. Mildred does whatever is best for Mildred.

Honey this is not time for a love confession. This is time to apologize and then let her decide how she feels.

Gwen doesn’t want a part in this!!!

Really? Cancer? Jesus.

Tbh I’m...not about this kiss?

I BET LENORE LEFT EVERYTHING TO PETUNIA HAHAHA

Lmao Mildred’s look when Betsy says she’s an example of grace

WHO NEEDS DOCTORS okay Betsy loving the confidence but also...you do. You need doctors.

Thoughts and Theories

Only one episode left to go!!! Tbh, I keep waiting to suddenly realize the meanings between the red and green lights, but it seems like they’ve abandoned the whole thing at this point, so who knows? Also, pretty sure my favorite character in this whole thing is Betsy Bucket. She’s just so delightful. I also really liked how she called Mildred out this episode, and I love that she got over Hanover and realized she deserved better and could run things on her own. And speaking of Hanover, what an ending! I feel horrible for Charlotte, but we all saw this coming. And despite everything, I really like Hanover as a character. He’s weak-willed and very idealistic and has a drug problem, but he’s a compassionate man. I think he’s a really good example of how despite the rampant corruption and abuse in psychiatric hospitals at the time, which Cuckoo’s Nest was written to comment on, there were also a lot of very well-intentioned doctors and nurses who truly did believe these treatments were what was best for their patients. They were products of their time. 

On to other things, I must admit I’ve been excitedly waiting for Gwen and Mildred’s first kiss and I was...really disappointed by the whole scene. I don’t like how Gwen’s very real and reasonable objections to being in a relationship with a liar and murderer are dismissed as a tactic to make Mildred go away because Gwen is scared of dying. I don’t like how Mildred reacts in the scene either. The way keeps trying to touch Gwen even though Gwen is batting her hands away is not an okay thing to do, and she really seems to thing that everything should be fine between them and she should be forgiven because she had reasons for killing and hurting people, but that’s not a decision she gets to make for Gwen. She doesn’t really seem to acknowledge or respect that Gwen is not comfortable being with her, and in a situation like this where someone is trying to tell you “no” and trying to explain their feelings, insisting on how much you love them is not a comfort; it’s a manipulation.  Idk, the friends I’ve talked to who have finished the season say that their dynamic improves in the last episode, so I’ll try to go in with an open mind, but this is not what I’d hoped for. It’s completely understandable that Mildred has some unhealthy relationship behaviors, but they need to be portrayed as such, and this kind of thing often isn’t. Gwen has always been so straightforward and insistent about being heard and respected that her giving in like this seems out of character, too.

[hu4ngs]

Ten as a boyfriend pls! Thank you!!

ohhhh boi

omg this baby

first of all congrats, you’ve got yourself a MAN

so let’s go from a to z

you met him when you attended your friend’s (let’s say guanheng) sports match

you weren’t all close to guanheng, so you have no idea who’s in his friend’s circle

and you were very much surprised that he asked you - of all people - to go to his match

so as a token of gratitude, you attended

you sat on the bleachers

you sat next to ten ;)

your first thought when you saw him was that you think he looks so much alike guanheng

when ten caught you staring, him being a lil shit, he just HAD to call you out, playfully, of course

“take a picture, it lasts longer”

you’re confused and taken aback

“i’m sorry, what?”

he laughed at you, before shaking his head

“i was kidding!” he told you

and then you laughed, but you were still very confused

ten, on the other hand, just brushed it off

although he’s a little embarrassed that his joke didn’t come through

there was an awkward silence between you two now

“so who are you here for?” he asked

“my friend, guanheng. he said this is his first time being a regular, so he wants every one he knows to -”

“to go see his match?” he finished your sentence for you

you’re really confused with this man

you nodded nevertheless, “how’d you know?” 

surprise surprise

guanheng and him are friends!

so you two exchanged instagrams cuz why not

he’s hot, you’re hot, i don’t see a problem here

and then it just continued on since then

you’d reply to his story

he’d reply to your story

it continued on like that for about two months

and then ten finally tells you that he’d like to have your number

you’re more than happy to give them to you

then you two started playing imessage games together

ten: damn you really suck at cup pong, y/n

you: literally leave me alone

ten: saving your number as ‘loser’ now

this goes on for a few more months i tell you

because ten is a prideful person

he’s not just gonna give in and admit to himself (or to anyone, for that matter) that he has fallen in love

plus, if you’re gonna get TEN to have a crush on you, you’re gonna have to wait longer than 3 months, this man isn’t here for puppy love, he’s here for LOVE love

after months, and you two are noticeably comfortable with each other now, you started opening up a little

every now and then you’d talk about your day to him

and ten appreciates that

he feels needed

he feels wanted

and he loves feeling that way

he loves feeling important to someone

even if he doesn’t open up as much as you do, you didn’t mind

you figured when he wants to open up, he will

and he noticed this about you, and totally loved this about you

plus to you, it’s not a big matter anywas

oh, you’re so oblivious with your feelings for him that was increasingly growing that’s why you’re so tolerable for him

one fine day

more like night

you were texting him

and ten asked you out

das right

just you two, out on a date

he was so straightforward about it??? big dick energy right there

n e ways

you’re like holy shit holy fuck oh my god wow

of course you said yes

only an absolute fool wouldn’t say yes to ten

so the next day yall meet up

he looks stunning

you look stunning

oh god i love a power couple

ten’s a little shy than he was the last time you saw him

and when he’s shy, he giggles and smiles a lot its adorable i tell you i’m so in love with you, ten

anywAys

he took you out to see a movie

and there wasn’t any bomb movie at that time so yall settled with a horror movie

but its shitty though

but it’s okay bc it’s the memories that matters xoxo

ten purposely picked the couple seat btw

he’s a sly fox

like i said it was a crappy horror movie so you weren’t really scared

but ten was surprisingly kept on his toes during some parts

considering all the times ten had teased you thru text

you decided to jumpscare him

you whispered-yelled a ‘boo!’ to him during the suspense part

and he actually S C R E A M

mans screamed LMAO

the few people who came to watch the movie gave you two quick glances

“i’m gonna beat your ass, y/n!” he told you

but you were too busy laughing to react to him

after the movie ended

ten was still a lil mad that you embarrassed him like that

so you decided to take him to an arcade 

ten quickly got over it and was excited to beat you in games like he usually does

“try beating me in real basketball the same way you did in the imessage version, loser!” ten told you

and obviously he won

virtual basketball and actual basketball are two different things

and you sucked at sports, even if its just an arcade game

i hope you know what basketball game im talking about omfg

and then you decided to play that shooting game where you have to kill zombies

it was nerve-wrecking 

you two were literally SO loud with letting out frustrations about how the zombies should just ‘leave you alone’ and how they should ‘go fuck themselves’

but yall actually won the game!!

you losers actually WON!!

you were so happy because you’re so used to losing in games

that you just,,, pulled ten into a hug

as you excitedly laugh, happily telling him that you’ve won because of how good your teamwork was

your ear was pressed exactly to where his heart was

and you’re surprised that his heart was beating so fast and so loudly

maybe it’s just the adrenaline from playing the game

so you brushed it off

then you went out to eat together

and when yall were eating

you talked to each other a bit more

talking about random things and facts about yourselves

you know,,, small talk and shit

ten, at this point, had already acknowledged that he has feelings for you

but after knowing how much you’re well educated about things he’s interested in, he falls harder for you

as you were busy talking

he couldn’t help but hold one of your hand that was on the table

you quickly became quiet as you stared down at his hand

“ten?”

“hey, y/n?”

you nodded as a response, wondering what the hell is he up to now

“do you think i’m a dumbass?”

you laughed at that question, not thinking much of it

you are, in fact, more intrigued with him holding your hand like that

“sure, sometimes you are”

he chuckled at your answer

and then he made eye contact with you

“well am i a dumbass if i told you that i like you? and that i wanna date you?”

you almost choked on your food

“wait! wait, wait. do you mean that?”

“of course”

you didn’t think twice

you’ve never been so sure about an answer your WHOLE life until now

“then yes, you are a dumbass! but, i like dumbasses. especially cute ones like you”

oh boy ten loves his baby confident like that btw ^

and voila! ever since then you two became a couple

NOW i was so into writing this

let’s get to the point

him as your boyfriend?

nothing changed much

except now he takes you out in so much dates

he loves you so much, and he’s constantly reminding you

he’s not one to admit his love as often as it seemed, so he’d show it through his act of kindness

he knows how much you appreciate the little things

so, he’d shower you with little things

he’d tell you to be safe when you’re on your way to somewhere

facetimes/calls you whenever you tell him a good news, just to congratulate you and say ‘i love you and i’m proud of you, baby!’

he has a lot of petnames for you

baby, angel, babe, honey, darling, fatass, loser, the list goes on

he comes over so often you have a hard time trying to sneak him out whenever your family member comes back from work/school

he’d tease you a lot for being scared to introduce him to your parents though

but he doesn’t mind, when you’re ready, you’re ready

he doesn’t really hug a lot

he kisses you a lot though

he lovesssss giving you a peck on your lips

when you two meet up? kiss

when you’re going back home? kiss

when you made a funny joke? kiss

when he finds you adorable? kiss

oh my god your first kiss with him was totally accidental

ten was showing you his new art and you complimented him

it boosted his self confidence

and then he was jokingly saying “your boyfriend is such a genius artist, don’t you think?”

he was walking towards you at the same time

then he accidentally tripped whilst he was rambling on about how amazing he is

but it’s okay he landed straight into your arms so you managed to catch him before he falls and breaks his nose

BUT his lips landed a centimetre away from your lips

when he pulled back he was like O__O

“did i kiss you?”

“no”

“aw, that sucks”

you were kinda blushing now

he saw you like this, and took this opportunity

he quickly wrapped his arm around your waist, and leaned in to kiss you

it wasn’t THAT passionate

but it was sweet

he was smiling in the kiss when you kissed back

when he pulled away, your noses were still touching

and he took the time to admire your beautiful face

“i love you, babe”

ANYWAYS!! OH MY GOD THIS IS GETTING ME IN MY FEELS!!!!

he compliments you a lot too

he’s constantly reminding you that you’re beautiful

sometimes he invites you when he’s going out with guanheng/taeyong/johnny because he wants everyone he cares about to meet you

he talks about you a lot to his family, too

saying how lovely you are, and how smart you are

and that his family would absolutely adore you when you meet them

god he praises you so much he literally boosts your confidence

oh ALSO!!!

he’d go to every event you joined

you’re doing a performance at your school/college? he’s there to support you

your school’s doing an open carnival and you’re the host for the event? he’ll be there

you’re at a math championship? he’s sitting amongst the crowd praying you’d do your best

you’re volunteering? you’re going together because no way in hell is he gonna let you do all these hard work without his help

you appreciate this so much, it means a lot to you

during your anniversaries/birthday, he’d surprised you a lot

he’d buy you the gift that you didn’t remember telling him that you wanted it

along with 10 other gifts that he bought you 

he’ll take you to that fancy restaurant you’ve been eyeing a lot whenever you two go out

he’ll also remind you how much he loves you because you just mean so much to him

whenever you two argue

he’s usually a dick ngl

he’s got a sassy mouth

it’s not his fault if he roasts you

also

you two argue quite often too

some more serious than the other

ten builds a big wall around his heart because he’s just a guarded person in general

it takes a long time for him to open up and trust someone

but once he does, he trusts said people very dearly

even so, whenever you argue, it’d take a while for him to cheer up

it takes an even longer time if he was in the wrong, because he’s quite an egotistical person

but once he cools down completely

he’ll go see you

and he’ll cuddle with you for as long as he can

caressing your hair

whispering sweet nothings into your ear

he does feel guilty of course, but its kinda difficult for him to apologise, so he does these act of kindness instead as an apology

he doesn’t mean anything that he said when he argued with you though

he was simply just trying to win the argument

he’s so glad that you’re able to tolerate with him

because not a lot of people can

he appreciates you a lot for that

he makes it clear that he’d do anything for you because you’re simply worth the effort

in conclusion

ten would be an amazing boyfriend for you

he loves you dearly

he will be the best boyfriend ever

his hugs will linger with you for days

his kisses gets sweeter each time he kiss you

although he can be an ass sometimes

it can’t be helped, that’s part of ten’s nature

he’s a lil mischievous, so you need to tolerate with that, the same way he’ll have (and will) tolerate with your bad sides too

please don’t ever let him go

ten as your boyfriend will make you forget about you exes, he’s just THAT amazing

i said it countless times but im gonna say it again

he loves you so much, so so so so so much, you’re his own personal angel to him

[anxiety-trademark]

The week in review:

Raw 09/21 NXT 09/23 NXT UK 09/24 Smackdown 09/25 Clash of Champions 09/27 + Main Event 09/24

Raw:

Billie’s not wrong. None of these people are wrong. That title has fallen so fucking far since Becky held it, Jesus.

Interesting to see Billie Kay be somewhat (?) supportive of Peyton. Manager?

I implore women to stop using red eyeliner unless you’re trying to look possessed.

Oh at least Mickie’s gonna have her last match with her snazzy pants on.

God that theme music is so outdated.

If there was one person on the roster that could convince me they wrestled in the Diva’s era, it’d be Mickie James.

Beautiful Octopus, dare I say best in the division. Look at those crossed legs. Just beautiful, Zelina.

Man it was cool watching Zelina reverse the powerbomb attempt into a rollup, but Mickie couldn’t be bothered to get her shoulders down for a 2 count before the reversal. Shame.

Zelina needs an increase to her speed to pull off the style she’s going for, but it’s a fun style.

oof I think Mickie actually caught Zelina’s forehead with that high kick.

Seated Senton off the top rope is garbage and I hate it.

Lmfao Zelina won with a backstabber. She’s literally Sasha-lite. Okay.

Word was Bianca was the star of the pc combine, right? So if you wanna showcase her strength, do it against someone I fucking know lmao. Who was this bro? Of course she’s stronger than a nobody in the pc. Friggin Alexa Bliss can effortlessly give piggy back rides to Sheamus. That’s impressive, because I know how strong and big he is. This could’ve been done better is all I’m saying. Maybe do a sitdown interview with her pc peeps hyping her up, or show footage of her blowing everyone in the combine out the park. Idk.

Ruby stop hyping up Nia and Shayna individually, individually they suck lol lesbireal.

So did Ruby just give Liv her shirt? …You know what, it works, I’m not gonna dig into this.

I feel like all women use the same starting moves against Nia and it’s a little tired ngl. They do this headscissors into a standing crucifix hold, and then slide down to try and roll her up. Then she picks them up and headbutts them. Come on peeps.

Mk just throw Lana through another table, she’s as useless in the ring (kf wise) as Liv is on commentary (non-kf wise)

Let me rewind, how did Nattie get taken out this time? A punch again. COOL. Nattie confirmed worst tag partner in the history of the division.

Lmfao rip Lana. Bye.

Wow we just said fuck entrances huh? Ugh God. Imagine Becky not getting an entrance as a damn champion.

So Peyton forgoes jumping for the German suplex, which could’ve resulted in her landing on Asuka’s head, and her reaction is to laugh. Consummate professional. Becky Lynch’s optic cranial nerve injury (caused by a failed German suplex) called, it can’t seem to find the humor.

Idk what that double underhooked move was by Peyton, but it was nice.

What bothers me about Peyton’s spinning heel kick, is as high as she gets it, she only hits people with her calf. Awkward to see.

That attempted transition into the Asuka Lock was... something.

Highlight: Lana going through the table

---

NXT:

Did Tegan say “why me” to Candice fucking her knee up with a metal pipe? Somebody get this girl some tissues.

Haha watching Tegan writhe in pain is funny. Candice gets points. And I do not like giving Candice points.

Really appreciate Rhea’s theme after hearing so much generic garbage lately. She’s so done with nxt as a performer, she has passed literally all of them by.

Not to be that person, but seeing so many people in the ring together bothers me. If one person was sick, literally all of them are sick now. It’s just kinda yikes.

Did they forego having a crowd? If so, wise. There’s enough ppl in the ring and at ringside.

Rhea fucking yeeted that girl into the barrier lmaooo.

“...Marina Shafir who’s done some great things on Raw Underground recently,” lmao sure.

The absolute half-assed attempt by that girl to pull herself up before Rhea booted her down to the floor was questionable.

So adding all these random peeps from the pc to this battle royal was done solely to have Raquel and Rhea flex for their feud in 4 months, huh.

Kacy does cool shit, wbk lmao. Gets kicked out, lands on her back, rolls into a handstand, rotates, pulls herself up into the ring using her feet on the ropes; gets kicked out, lands on the side of the guardrail, pulls herself up, uses the plexiglass to help balance herself, jumps onto the stairs; gets kicked out, lands on the side of the guardrail, stands on Kayden’s shoulders and gets chauffeured back to the ring. Brilliant. Would be overkill in a Royal Rumble, but it works here.

R&R eliminate each other/themselves together. Fitting. Dakota “help me I’m useless on my own” Kai is shook.

Why is Indi in the top 5? Or top 7? How is this girl so damn prestigious??

Kacy really just slung herself around the ringpost. I’m becoming a fan of her antics/performances in multiwomen matches.

I see Shotzi’s character is, “I come so close yet cannot manage to touch the gold.” I feel for her... cuz I can’t stand Candice.

Boooo

I love how Io carries herself. She’s a shining example of not allowing her heritage to hold her back or make her feel unimportant. She responds in Japanese, and without missing a beat, translates in perfectly spoken and quick English. Never dances, never smiles, never looks like a chump. Serious and answers the damn question. She gets points.

Highlight: Kacy shenanigans

---

NXT UK:

Lol I love KLR so much. Just ducks out of the ring the first time she’s bested.

“KLR is well versed in mental manipulation,” that she is. She’s honestly a top competitor in that sense; equal to the likes of Sasha and Charlotte when it comes to psychology.

Piper’s got power. Ragdolling KLR here.

That’s right, performing with Charlotte Flair at wm is an accolade one can only hope to achieve (I’m annoying I know) no but seriously, KLR vs Becky Lynch? Take my money.

Nice Superkick, nice Tornado ddt.

Dear ref, stop yelling at her and restart the count. Dweeb.

Lmao self inflicted wreckage of her knee. 

This ref is a walking headache. We’re now getting into the autumn of overbooked women’s matches. And UK’s first title match back. Yikes.

That senton was awkward and looked painful af for KLR’s neck. If you’re gonna risk that move while selling a leg injury, make sure you have more space to correct your landing.

I almost wish that turnbuckle came undone naturally because KLR is already such a good seller, but I’m gonna assume this is a worked move since it’s been left exposed.

Yeah see there are issues with that spot. Positives: KLR didn’t purposefully undo the turnbuckle, so it’s not on her to give another title match; the spot has potential, as I’m guessing that would be genuinely painful. Negatives: Piper is too big of a woman to hit the lower turnbuckle doing the cannonball, so she ended up hitting the middle... which was padded. Good ending on paper if you don’t do the equations, but poor execution. Not Piper nor KLR’s fault though.

Slow pacing and I hate overbooked garbage, but this obviously isn’t the only match they’re having so *shrug*

Highlight: Clean tornado ddt, and I do love KLR’s selling

---

Smackdown:

Lol Bayley has her chair. She automatically gets a point every time I see it.

Top of the ramp this time? Okay, sure.

Stop cutting to the fancams, production. I don’t care about their reactions.

A fine enough promo to move along both of her angles, but production sucks. Wbk though.

“...one of the most complex personalities,” which personality of Alexa’s are we referring to, though?

Their timing on her pyro was off and now I’m sad. The pops during the breakdown leading into the fountains are fucking amazing and honestly cannot be topped by any of the other women.

When did Alexa stop wearing her gloves to the ring? Probably when she turned face. Shame.

She just called Lacey bitter, southern tea, and you know what? What a fucking drag. Imagine bitter southern tea. As someone who was raised in the south, that is a disgrace to southern tea. Sweet sun tea or pass.

Look at Alexa: selling Lacey’s strength, full of agile speed, and yet here’s Lacey not even bothering to put her shoulders down for her pin attempt. SAD.

A problem I consistently have with SD in particular is how they set up commercial breaks. They always do something dramatic, cut to commercial, come back and shit’s always completely different. How you gonna cut from Alexa leading and hearing the Fiend’s laugh, to return to Lacey in charge ???

Dear Cole, why are you calling her Alexis lol. Like I know that’s her real name but, hello??

oof Alexa’s midsection is beet red.

Lacey has not been putting on a “clinic” stop tossing that term around, Cole. Good bump by Alexa though.

Love how Lacey doesn’t mind landing flat when her moonsault misses. Respect. Her and Charlotte both eat that so perfectly.

LOVE how the monitors of people turned into Fiend’s face. POINTS.

It’s like she’s reverted back to her heel persona. This is literally 2016 Bliss, right? Right??

Roman is a large, strong, intimidating guy... but holy shit the visual of 5′1 Alexa staring daggers into the back of his head is intense af. I almost complained that he cut off her exit, but well done with the continuity.

Highlight: I’m really digging the Alexa/Fiend story

---

Clash of Champions:

Loving the red roots, hate the eyeshadow.

See, if Asuka wants to fuck around in the ring, you won’t hear me complain. I just wish she took her non-wrestling segments more seriously.

The patience Asuka gave Zelina to set up the arm kick was dumb.

“A hard arm bar by Asuka,” he says, even though her legs were completely bent. Easy on the credit given plz.

Zelina telegraphs too much. None of the bumps she takes ever catch me by surprise.

In the spirit of being fair, put your fucking shoulders down and let her attempt a pinfall, Asuka.

Haha Sasha-lite did meteora in the corner.

Nice roll into a kick, half point for Zelina.

No you don’t get to sell frustration or disbelief yet, that’s not buyable.

I don’t know wtf Zelina was going for with that counter before the Asuka Lock, but honestly idc. Could’ve been a kickoff match indeed. State of Becky’s title btw.

Every week it’s the same shit with Asuka. She gets on the mic, speaks Japanese, barely accomplishes anything, then gets interrupted/slapped/attacked... with dancing and smiling inbetween. I really wish she was more like Io.

Nikki isn’t “medically cleared to compete”, and the tag team titles aren’t being defended. My memory is fuzzy but wasn’t there some covid concerns going around back then? Was that just baseless speculation?

Love that Bayley turned this into an opportunity to be a bigger douche than she already was lol.

IS SHE DOING A VICTORY LAP LMAO

I want to hate this from a smarky “give other women a chance” perspective, but Bayley is an ass and this is great for Asuka to build credit as a face, and after being made to look foolish yet again. Lesgo.

Lol sounded like Bayley said, “you think you can cuck me?” I’m sure she didn’t. I’m choosing to believe she did though.

I never know exactly who to blame when Asuka’s Codebreaker looks ugly, but I swear Charlotte is the only one it looks impactful with. Sell job isn’t the problem, but taking that actual move is always dicey af.

Great kick by Asuka. Rekt.

Bayley says nah fuck this rofl. Fair ending; a fun little sprint of meaningless jabs.

“Chairwoman of SD” I like that too, Graves. Points to you.

LMAOOO Bayley set that shit up perfectly kekekek what’s up Sasha.

She be looking fucking incredible, but that neckbrace is a mega bummer.

Character wise, I’m surprised Bayley’s choosing to dole out punishment rather than taking her title and bolting.

Welp maybe she should have, Sasha going to town lmao.

oof peep that red line going down Bayley’s arm. eesh. Welts all over her back.

Highlight: Sasha beating the shit out of Bayley with a kendo stick

---

*BONUS*

Main Event:

You don’t pan the camera over to fucking commentary during Bianca’s entrance. Do better @ production.

Ruby puts her confidence in Liv even though everybody knows Bianca is winning this match lmao.

LOVE Liv’s boots.

like 20 seconds into the match and it’s already 10x better than the Bianca vs Billie Kay one. Don’t even waste a spot on Main Event for Billie Kay. No, I’m not not sorry for saying that.

It’s not that I hold issue with Bianca’s showboating or mannerisms, but it’s all so much more fitting for a heel.

Beautiful stalling suplex, but Liv is rather small.

Beautiful distance on that dropkick to Liv. Liv gets points for throwing herself so far.

We have enough women who rip their shirts off deep into matches, me thinks. Don’t need it from Liv as well.

Momentum could’ve been split better, but that was a decent match.

---

*Clash of Champions would be my highlighted event mostly thanks to Bayley, but if that’s a cop out, I’ll give a slight nod to Smackdown’s handling of Alexa.

[acidmatze]

A Fractured Sense Of Self

About one year ago I made a post about Hawks possibly having Dependend Personality Disorder since I saw so many things in him that I saw in myself.

After several talks with my therapist however it became more and more apparent that I had been close but didn't really hit the target.

I'm not here to push a diagnosis on Hawks. He's just fictional after all and I am just someone overanalysing things and not a professional of any kind.

I'm probably gonna lay out the “symptoms” or rather.... Behaviours of Borderline Personality Disorder, see if they fit Hawks and how and then try to somehow make sense of his state of mind and how it ties in with how he acts.

Trying to make sense of whatever the hell is happening in the recent chapters.

So when my therapist said “I looked some things up and I would say his behaviour fits BPD the best.” my brain immediately went to “No that can't be. Isn't that a thing teenagers have?”

Even though I Should Know Better. Damn you, media.

Ableism is so ingrained in society even people with mental illnesses themselves aren't safe.

But anyway, this isn't an essay about me doing parkour to avoid feelings and problems this is more about HAWKS doing the same.

Part 1  So what is BPD anyway?

BPD is characterized by the following signs and symptoms:

Markedly disturbed sense of identity

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, and extreme reactions to such.

Splitting ("black-and-white" thinking)

Impulsive or reckless behaviors (e.g., impulsive or uncontrollable spending, unsafe sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)

Intense or uncontrollable emotional reactions that often seem disproportionate to the event or situation

Unstable and chaotic interpersonal relationships

Self-damaging behavior

Distorted self-image

Dissociation

Frequently accompanied by depression, anxiety, anger, substance abuse, or rage

Says Wikipedia

Let's see if and how Hawks fits these behaviour patterns.

(If you read this and suddenly realise “Oh shit I do stuff like that!” then please know you are in no way a horrible person. You did not choose any of these things. Stay safe cuz the world needs you.)

I'm intentionally leaving the Identity part for last.

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, and extreme reactions to such.

And

Splitting ("black-and-white" thinking)

I'm gonna take both points on at the same time cuz they are dependend on one another and one thing causes the other.

Why did he suddenly switch from “I don't want to fight you! I want to help you!” while looking desperate and disturbed (and meaning it!) to a pretty much emotionless “I have to kill you” (and meaning that too)?

He wanted to help Twice!

He really believes that Rehabilitation is the way to go for him.

After all, Twice is a good person and good people should have no troubles in hero society, right? Only bad people are villains, right?

If Twice is a good person he should have no problems choosing Rehabilitation and come back to the hero side, right? They are friends and that's what friends do right? Friends agree with one another, right?

And then Twice declines and insults the one thing Hawks really believes in (because he never was taught anything else).

Which caused Hawks to:

Perceive Twice as an enemy instead.

Friends agree with one another and Twice does not agree which means he is not a friend which means he is an enemy and should be killed.

Hawks (probably) has never killed before and it's not the job of a hero even. Heroes should go out of their way to avoid murder and bloodshed.

So in my opinion this sudden switch from “my friend” to “enemy” is definitely fueled by Hawks own emotions. The feeling of betrayal; not only did Twice insult the hero system he also insulted Hawks himself because Hawks cannot seperate himself from the System. As far as he perceives it they are one. It is Hawks sole identity.

It is easy for us to say there are bad heroes and good villains.

Because what is Good and what is Bad can change from situation to situation and is always dependend on circumstances.

A person can both be good and bad at the same.

A person can give lots of money to charity. We would say that's a good person.

The same person can also constantly lie to people and be unreliable towards their friends.

We would say that's a bad person.

But we know it's the same person and we all do things that are good AND bad. We all do good things. And we also have done bad things.

What I wanna say is, no person is completely black or white. We are all shades of grey.

“I really love to have Joe as a friend. He's such a great listener and we have amazing talks but he really has to come clean to his girlfriend about crashing her car.”

For Hawks, this is not so easy to understand.

In his mind a person can either be good OR bad.

All villains are bad. All heroes are good.

This ties in with his own anxiety about not solving a situation in the best possible way.

Making even one mistake is not an option. Heroes are good people and good people don't make mistakes.

He was So Close to realising that Twice is a good person even though he is a villain but one of these moments cannot undo over a decade of brainwashing.

“The contradictionary truth that things or persons can be black and white, good or bad, etc At The Same Time, seems unimaginable.”

(Fragmented Selves: Temporality and Identity in Borderline Personality Disorder by Thomas Fuchs)

Impulsive behaviour

This one is either easy or hard, depending on how you look at it.

We don't know what Hawks does in his free time and if he even has anything like such.

But reckless behaviours are basically part of his job so he probably already gets his fill there.

Intense or uncontrollable emotional reactions that often seem disproportionate to the event or situation

See his reaction towards Twice.

Unstable and chaotic interpersonal relationships

Or rather, a complete lack of any relationship whatsoever.

He either idolises people (Endeavor) or demonises them (Twice right now).

One could argue that as of now Hawks is completely incapable or forming any sort of emotional connection. He himself says he doesn't get attached, sees it as a weakness. For me it sounds like a defense mechanism.

He Did get attached to Twice and we saw how that played out.

But Hawks getting hurt over and over is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Thinking of someone as either completely good or completely bad does little to aid a friendship.

Endeavor’s abuse getting exposed would probably cause Hawks to go through a crisis. He idolises Endeavor. In his eyes Endeavor can do no wrong.

Normally I would say this is something that must be avoided at any cost but in Hawks case, it is probably a necessary step to help him break the lock of his golden cage.

Self-damaging behavior

“If corrupting myself is enough to put everyone at ease then I will gladly take on this job”, anyone?

Hawks sending all his feathers to Endeavor to help him anyone?

When is this bird NOT hurting himself?

There are many ways to self-harm and this is Hawks way to do it.

Isn't it convenient that nobody would question is since he's just doing his job?

Distorted self-image

Goes hand in hand with the very first point which I wanna do last, just in case it gets really really long.

Dissociation

To be honest, I couldn't find any signs of that in Hawks. If someone of you can, just correct me.

Frequently accompanied by depression, anxiety, anger, substance abuse, or rage

Hawks seems to vaguely know that something is going wrong in his life and he absolutely does not like his circumstances.

He wishes to be free.

When he looked at Twice and smiled and said “A cage is not where I belong” it seemed to me like he looked more pained than genuinely joking.

He mentions drinking alcohol after work so this could or could not mean anything.

Maybe he wishes he could get smashed after work?

Who knows.

But he is definitely depressed and tries to cover it with jokes. Some depressed people joke even more the worse they feel.

Seriously, his interactions with Twice seemed to be the most genuine ones, where he was/is the most vulnerable.

The jovial, easygoing, chatty Hawks is a lie. A lie he has forced himself to believe in.

A role he has to play. But he played it for so long he forgot that it is just a role in a play and not real.

Part 2 Hawks must die

Okay, that sounds really harsh. I promise it's just a metaphorical death. I'm side-eyeing Horikoshi so hard right now.

Now we will take a look at his identity, or lack of one.

Lately what I really was reminded of was this “Inner child” thing.

We only caught glimpses of Hawks as a literal child. He probably grew up in an unstable home. Probably had no one really looking after him, why else would such a young child roam around the city alone so freely that it has the chance to help in a car crash?

He didn't look much older than 6 or 8.

The Hero Commission discovered him and took him in and “provided for his entire family”.

What happened was that he was apparently completely removed from his family and was put into a clinical environment, cold, not suited for children at all, hell probably barely suited for any human being.

Hawks remembers that even as a child he was taught interrogation techniques. Espionage.

From a very young age he was taught to leave himself behind. To mold himself into whatever he needs to be to complete the mission. To be a chameleon. A mirror. Just a reflection of what others expect him to be.

He has to be A so he becomes A. He has to be B now so he ignores he ever was A and is B now.

He has to be Hawks so Takami Keigo becomes Hawks and leaves himself behind.

The last time he was Takami Keigo was when he was a child.

Change is a normal part in humans. It's very important during puberty. That's why teenagers experiment with it so much.

“Oh, it's just a phase” sneer the adults when the teen wears only black and say thats the “Real me”. In a few months the same teen probably tries something else.

That's a good and normal thing. Even as adults we are constantly changing and adapting.

But we never forget the person we once were. We stay connected to it, maybe remember it fondly and think of the friends we found that way.

Or sometimes we look back and cringe because “Wow, my parents really let me go outside like this?”

It forms one fluent narrative. All these changes are still us. We know that we are the same person as we were last year even if last year's us was completely different from today's us.

Hawks doesn't have this continuity.

He became Hawks and wasn't allowed any further change and he also wasn't allowed to be Takami Keigo at the same time. He is a tool to be used.

Takami Keigo is a frightened child. A child that made a decision and thought he did well and now this decision is his downfall.

Takami Keigo was never allowed to grow up. He was pushed away, so he can be Hawks instead, probably as an attempt to gain approval, to be praised, to be liked.

Hawks is an amazing actor, likeable, chatty, funny and witty, very competent at his job and smart.

Takami Keigo is a scared child.

If Hawks stops being Hawks there is nothing he can go back to.

Normally people with Borderline ofc also go through “phases” as everyone else does but instead of putting them all into a single narrative and file them all away under “That's me” every phase is it's own seperate story.

All energy is put into one “phase” as much as neurotypicals do but once this phase is over there is nothing that comes after it. When people without Borderline change “phases” we know a “home” we can revert to while we change. Our Self still exists in us wether we are currently obsessing about Ballett or Comics or Dinosaurs or Architecture or whatever.

For someone like Hawks theres either Ballet or comics or dinosaurs or whatever. No neutral spot. You are either the person who puts all their energy into becoming an archaeologist or you're nothing. Being something gives you a goal to work towards to. It tells you who to talk to, what to talk about, what to do in your free time etc.

Hawks being Hawks gives him a goal, a worldview, things to believe in, topics to talk about, a job, people to talk to, opinions to have etc. It gives him an identity, ready-made and easy to consume.

He cannot be anything else but Hawks. He is nothing beyond that.

Takami Keigo plays Hawks, they are not one and the same person.

He is Hawks but Hawks isn't Takami Keigo.

Takami Keigo holds no opinion of his own, no worldview, no goal, no hobbies, nothing.

Hawks has to die so Takami Keigo can heal. So the frightened child can finally grow up.

[is0gild]

Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Chapter 10

Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC

Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.

Word Count: 7,783

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

Credit for super friggin’ cute and super friggin’ amazing cover art goes to the super friggin’ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

It’s times like these that I really do wonder which is more nerve-racking: being thrust into a social interaction unwillingly with a whole bunch of people? Or unwittingly with just one single, solitary person?

With the large group, it was definitely and without a doubt overwhelming. Just finding the strength alone to speak up and join in the conversation was a skill that still escaped me. And even if you did manage to get so much as two words out, that meant all eyes were suddenly on you. What if you talked too much? Or too little? What if you forgot what you were saying at all? Or worse, what if you said something stupid? What if you embarrassed yourself so bad that there’d be no showing your face ever again in the light of day, much less to another human being?

Which, if I’m being totally honest, I would probably find kind of amazing.

Hermit for life, yo.

But then, there were also advantages to the crowd. The biggest one being that an antisocial, cave-dwelling troll like me? More often than not could get away with saying nothing at all. Everyone else could handle all the chit-chat while I simply faded into the background and soaked up the ambiance. That way, I could just make an appearance and give the illusion of being socially active without actually being socially active.

One-on-one exchanges, on the other hand? Now those were a whole other beast. No, make that whole other species.

There was no fading into the background here. There wasn’t even a background to fade into. All there was was you and the other person. A person you were expected to carry half of the conversation with. When put on the spot like that with someone I barely knew, forget having a back-and-forth dialogue like a normal and well-adjusted friggin’ adult, I was lucky if I got anything out of my mouth more sophisticated than “uh” or “um.” Then there were the awkward silences where I’d frantically try to come up with something, anything to say only to have my useless lump of a brain play possum and draw a total blank. I died a thousand and one deaths in those damn silences.

And okay, sure, this was Lea we were talking about. An individual who by now I’d shockingly, and on more than one occasion no less, made reasonably successful small talk with. But a few minutes of a lunch break here or some brief, friendly banter while I was taking his order as my customer there was completely different than now finding myself alone with him in a booth at some random pub on a Friday night.

And besides, it was Lea. Lea, who I’d seen shirtless and slathered in ice cream. Lea, whose lips my lips had thrown themselves at within the first five minutes of meeting him. Lea, who-

Damn it, brain, really? Was now really the best time to be playing the highlight reel of Elsa’s Greatest Embarrassing Hits?

Needless to say?

I.

Was.

Terrified.

Anna Fryse, if you could please report to the table in the back right corner, your older sister is waiting for you and is in desperate need of someone to hide behind right about now.

Also, Anna, if you were ever planning on developing the ability to psychically read thoughts, particularly mine, now would be the time to do it.

...of course, for her to hear that message, she’d need to already be psychic.

And if she was, that meant she was ignoring me.

Which she totally would do.

Brat.

Checking back into reality momentarily, it was in this second that it came to my attention that I was staring at Lea without realizing it. Well now I realized it. Particularly because he was looking back at me with a smile. My heart flatlined, my face paled and my eyes darted away.

Oh god, I had been staring. Did he know I’d been staring? ...of course he did, Elsa you dope! That’s generally what two people do when they're sitting together at a table talking.

Talking. Right. That was a thing I should be doing.

Alright, brain, I know you’re doing your best impersonation of the sound of a mime convention in there right now, but I’m going to need you to work with me here. Think of a word. Any word. Just something to get the conversation rolling. Oh yes. I can feel it. Here it comes. And that word is…

Flamingo.

...seriously, brain? Hadn’t we already said all that there was to say on the subject of flamingos earlier during the little palm notes debacle? Need we bring that back up again? I mean, I do see where you’re coming from - once you ask a man what he does in his flamingo, what else more is there to discuss with him, really? Might as well just-

“Fabracadabra?”

Lea’s voice broke through my thoughts, drawing my eyes back to him.

Wow. Now that was a really good word.

Way better than my lame word. Pssh, flamingo? What was that even about?

Wait… his word was also the name of another one of our ice cream flavors.

He took a swig from his ale as he studied me for a second, cocking his head before at last shaking it. “Nope. Too fruity sweet. You’re the type o’ gal who likes something with a lil more...” he clicked his teeth together with a smirk, “...bite to it.”

I blinked, some of my tension relaxing. Then my lips were doing something strange. Was it that crazy thing all the kids were doing nowadays, what’s it called? I believe the term was… grinning? “You’re… still trying to guess which one is my favorite?”

“Just you wait and see,” he scooched around the booth to sit closer to me, sliding the Ifrit bottle along the table with him, “I’m gonna get it. Mark my word.”

Turning my head slightly, I gave him some side-eye. “...you seem pretty sure of yourself.”

“With good reason! I’m twelve-and-oh, baby. Haven’t been wrong yet. Trust me, your top pick off the Ice Palace menu is as good as called.”

“Who ever said it was an Ice Palace signature flavor?”

His head rocked back at that, then he narrowed his eyes, “You play dirty.”

I hid a smile behind my fingers. “Want a hint?”

“Nah,” he leaned back, propping his elbows on the high back rim of the booth and stretching his long legs out under the table, crossed at the ankles. “Hints are for game show contestants and lame-os who lack self-confidence.”

“And you certainly have no shortage of confidence.”

He beamed, closing his eyes. “Nope! Who has two thumbs and is one cocky ass mofo?” Said two thumbs pointed at himself. “This guy.”

A soft snort escaped me and I shook my head. “No doubt about that,” I murmured as I looked away.

You know what? Maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad afterall. Actually, it was turning out kind of... nice.

My gaze settled on Anna and Kristoff out there. It was all the poor boy could do to keep up with my sister on the dance floor. She even tossed him out into a spin at one point, much to his surprise if the face he made was any clue. But he seemed to be coming around to the whole experience. It even looked like he might be, dare I say it, having fun. They both did. Watching the two of them had me feeling an upward tug at one corner of my lips.

“So how ‘bout it?” I heard Lea ask.

I looked back at him, quirking an eyebrow. “How about what?”

His eyes crinkled as he nodded towards an open spot out in the middle of the pub. “Wanna dance?”

Cue sound of shattering glass.

“Ack! My drink!” Rayne yelped from the booth behind me. “Sorry, I’ll pay to replace the cup!”

As for me? I’d choked. On what? My heart launching itself up into my throat would be my guess.

“W-with you?” my mouth blurted out without consulting me first.

“No, with Grand High King Fuddy-Duddy over there sporting the scar,” he tapped a finger to the bridge of his nose, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, with me.”

Why? Why would he ask-? What could he possibly be- Oh! Oh I get it now! He was just being nice! Yeah, that had to be it. He just wanted to make sure I had fun tonight. That I felt included. He was being a good friend. He really was a very sweet guy.

But me? Dance with Lea? Me? Who cowered and fled at the first sign of any form of human contact? Nope. Couldn’t do it. Quite simply no way, no how. Dancing with Lea meant I’d have to get close to him. That I’d have to touch him. Er… not to say that there was anything wrong with touching him! I mean, it actually might be quite pleasant to-

Wait, what?

Uh… let’s just put a pin in that wayward thought there and come back to it later, like say, oh I don’t know… never. In the meantime, Lea was still waiting on my answer.

I opened my mouth to give it.

All that came out was a squeak.

...let’s try that again, shall we?

Clearing my throat and snatching a wisp of my hair to tangle around my fingers, I at last got out a hasty, “No, I don’t think so.”

Was that harsh? It sounded harsh. Ugh, this is why I don’t do people!

He tsked and sighed. “It’s cuz I’m ugly, isn’t it?”

“What?!” I blanched before quickly shaking my head. “No! No, no, no! That’s not it! Not because you’re ugly! I mean, you’re not! Ugly, that is! Not at all! Far from it, you’re very-” I slapped both hands over my mouth, face roasting.

Shut up. Shut up right now.

I watched him bend forward, planting one elbow on the table and chin in his palm as he now eyed me with a wide, cheshire grin. “Do go on, I’m all ears. I’m very…?”

Oh this smug, son of a…

My eyelids drooped and I lowered my hands. “...very manipulative in fishing for compliments.”

“Guilty,” he snerked, leaning back once more and slouching a bit into the cushions. His grin twitched wider, “So, that’s a hard no then?”

I couldn’t help a tiny smile of my own. “Sorry. I... just don’t dance.”

“No worries. Figured you might say something like that. But couldn’t pass up the chance to ask either,” he winked, taking another sip of his drink. Then he paused, pursing his lips to one side and rubbing the nape of his neck. “...so what is your story anyway?”

Brow furrowing, I asked, “My story?”

He struck up a finger, “You’re twenty-two. Fresh outta college. Guessing Ivy League no less just by the look of you, but total shot in the dark there. And you just got your first job… in a mall food court. Which, ya know, absolutely nothing wrong with that, but it’s the type of gig that only teens, university students, and college dropouts go for. Take it from me, a dropout twice over now, but back at it again for round three hoping it sticks this time,” up the hand went again, now with index and middle digits crossed.

“Why didn’t it the first couple times?” my head tipped to one side.

Who, me? Trying to take focus off myself? Deflecting? Psssh, I would never!

He splayed a hand out over his chest, “Believe it or not, I wasn’t always the well-adjusted, level-headed and responsible individual that you see before you today.”

“Really?” I snorted, squinting at him. “Is that what I’m seeing before me? I hadn’t realized.”

“Shush, you. Trust me, six, seven years ago? I was a real punkass troublemaker. The kind of boy you don’t bring home to your parents, all about the sex, drugs and rock-n-roll scene, ya know? That whole college thing sounded lame to me, but all my friends were doing it, so figured hell,” he shrugged, “why not give it a shot? But me and college didn’t really play well together. I didn’t take it seriously, not really. So eventually decided it wasn’t for me and kicked it to the curb. Few years later? Thought myself older, wiser, ready to give the big ol’ four years and a diploma deal a second chance. But I was just fooling myself, I hadn’t changed one bit. Wasn’t long before we were parting ways once again.”

I folded my arms on the table, “So what’s changed? Why is try number three going to be different?”

Lea frowned up at the ceiling. “I guess you just hit a point in your life when you realize you don’t want to be slinging pizza dough at minimum wage forever. Even a screwup like me’s got dreams. Nothing too fancy... just maybe something like owning and operating my own place. Maybe a lil ice cream parlour by the beach, a real mom and pop kind of store.

“Ah, it’s silly,” he chuckled, shaking his head, “but either way, I know jackshit about running a business. And that’s why I’m back to hitting those books once again and this time I’m doing my damnedest to hammer some knowledge into this thick skull of mine,” he pointed to his temple. “I’ve really buckled down and, uh…” his eyes darted away, “...shall we say, kicked some old habits.”

“You sound like you really want to make it work this time.” I propped one elbow next to the Shiva, leaning my cheek into my hand. “I haven’t known you that long, but based on what I do know about you, I’m guessing there isn’t much you can’t do once you’ve really set your mind to it.”

“Thanks!” he laughed. Then his smile turned a shade wry, “Don’t think I didn’t notice you trying to change the subject on me.”

...fudge.

He went on, “You got my story, now I’d love to hear yours.”

“I told you already,” I frowned, my hands reaching for a napkin to start twisting between them. “My, er… my major didn’t work out. This job… it’s temporary and-”

Lea cut me off with a wave of his hand, “Yeah, yeah, I know what ya said. I’m more interested in what wasn’t said.”

I grimaced, my fingers strangling the poor paper napkin harder. “It’s… a long story.”

“I got time. Loads of it. Only if you want to talk about it though. No pressure, it just looks like you need it.”

Did I? What was that supposed to mean anyway? “...It’s kind of personal. I’m not even sure if it’s something I really should be talking about.”

His forehead wrinkled. “What, like it’s a secret?” Then his face brightened. “I love a good secret! Okay, how about this. Let’s do a trade. I’ll give you one of my secrets, you give me one of yours. Could be anything, big or small, just whatever you want.”

I blinked at him.

Apparently, he took that as a yes, for now he was hunching forward, bringing his face closer to mine and whispering, “So here’s one that only one other person knows and only cuz he’s known me since he and I were in diapers. Not even the kiddos are in on it. Okay, so, my first name?” He gave one more quick glance around to make sure the coast was clear before lowering his voice even further, “Not actually Lea.”

My eyebrows knit together. “It’s not?”

“Nope,” he shook his head. “Middle name. Go by it cuz I hate my first name.”

“Which is?”

His face pinched. “Axel.”

“...Axel,” I repeated flatly, one eyebrow arching.

“Yup. Apparently, my folks were total diehards for Guns n’ Roses. But the real kicker? The couple o’ useless junkies that gave me life were apparently too high off whatever drug o’ the week they were on to even make sure the name was spelled right on the birth certificate. So instead of having a rockstar singer for a namesake, I’m named after a goddamn skateboard trick all thanks to one stupid E that wasn’t s’posed to be there,” he grumbled, throwing himself back into his seat and slumping down, crossing his arms.

I just stared at him for a second, silence stretching. Then I spluttered and burst out in laughter, trying to smother it behind my hands.

“Wow, rude much?” he deadpanned.

“I’m sorry, I really am! It’s just, with the name and that whole story and your pout…” Oh gosh, that pout! I thought he was supposed to be twenty-five, not five. Still giggling but sobering somewhat, I continued, “I just couldn’t help myself. I really am sorry though, I know I shouldn’t have found it funny.”

“Bah, it’s fine,” he brushed off with a grin. “I’ve had my whole life to get over it and yeah, it’s a lil funny. But now it’s your turn, Missy. Gimme a secret. Anything’ll do. And don’t worry, I’ll be a lot nicer about it than some insensitive clods at the table,” he gave me a pointed look, smirk still in place to show he was only teasing.

Oh. Right. That. I’d almost forgotten. Though technically, I’d never agreed to anything. Then again, he did just kind of bare his soul to me. And I did just kind of ridicule him when he did. So maybe… in a way, I sort of owed it to him?

“I…” My voice wavered as I hesitated, hands mangling the napkin again. I gnawed my lower lip, looking down, hearing the thudding in my ribcage get louder. Finally, I squeezed my eyes shut and opened my mouth, not fully sure what was going to come out. “My parents… have no idea where I am right now. They haven’t for a while.”

His eyes widened slightly at that. Whatever he’d be expecting, apparently it hadn’t been that.

Hey, same boat here, buddy.

“Oh… I see,” was all he said at first, taking another slow pull from his drink now as he turned this new little tidbit over in his head.

And that wasn’t even the half of it. I hadn’t mentioned the type of family I was from. Or that’d I’d been in a relationship, no, engaged with a fiancé. Or that’d I’d left him at the altar on my wedding day. Or that when I had, I’d made the split second decision to abandon the only existence I’d ever known and was now stumbling through life with absolutely zero clue as to what the frick I was actually doing.

...yeah, that would have been a lot. Perhaps a bit too much for sharing time. I think I’d made the right call with dropping only this one tiny piece of the puzzle. At least for now. And who knows? He seemed pretty perceptive, maybe it’d be enough for him to read between the lines and answer some of his questions about me. Then again, maybe not.

At last he leaned forwarded onto his elbows, one arm tucked behind the other, and said, “Alright, I’m gonna take a crack at this and you can let me know if I’m right. Or not. You don’t even have to say jackshit, you can just let me blather on like the big lunkhead that I am who likes the sound of his own voice too much, which I’m used to so no worries, totally your call.” He paused, steepling his fingers to his lips as he seemingly gathered his thoughts. Then, “Up ‘til now, I’m guessing you’ve probably led a pretty sheltered life. One where you were maybe used to having all the decisions made for you. But then, for whatever reason or other, you recently decided to cut the cord. So now you find yourself out in the big, bad world that no one really prepared you for, scrambling to find a foothold, scared shitless and just trying to figure out what the hell to do with yourself, let alone with your future.”

Holy… how on earth did he…?

Swallowing hard, I fiddled with the straw in my cocktail and mumbled, “Wow, you are good. Ever consider becoming one of those windup psychics in a box that spits out fortunes on little cards?”

He snorted. “Sure did, but was too dang tall to fit into the glass case. Too bad, those lil dudes have it made.” Then he tilted his head. “...want some unsolicited advice?”

I shrugged, now absently stirring the blue liquid of my drink. “Sure, why not.”

“Get out there. Explore. Try new things. Right now, I’m guessing your worldview is very small, so you need to expand it. It’s the only way you’ll figure out what to make of your life. Cuz as glamorous as it is, I suspect you’re like me and don’t exactly want to be working the food court all the way up into your golden years.”

Now I looked up at him, a crease forming between my eyebrows. “...are you telling me to get out of my comfort zone?”

Lea chuckled, scratching his cheek, “Sure, I guess that’d be one of way of putting it.”

“That’s actually something I’ve been hearing a lot lately,” I sighed, sinking further down into my seat. Sure, it sounded good in theory. But in practice? Easier said than done. “...any suggestions on where to start?”

He gave a low hum, rubbing a curled knuckle to his chin. Then his eyes lit up and he snapped his fingers. “Got just the thing! Be back in a jiff!” Then he sprung up to his feet, one hand on top the table to catapult himself over it and out the booth. As soon as his shoes hit the floor, he raced off, disappearing into the bar crowd.

...okay?

Should I be afraid? Yes, I think I should be afraid. Very, very afraid.

My eyes squinted, scanning the crush of soberly-challenged people out there, searching for that distinctive fiery head of hair. Should have been easy given Lea was a living embodiment of Mount Fuji, but even so, I was having trouble spotting him.

A sudden blur darted out of the throng and landed hard on the cushion beside me, crashing into my side and distracting me from my hunt.

Said blur was Anna. Surprise, surprise.

“Whew!” she puffed out happily, sweating and fanning herself with one hand while the other crammed fries into her mouth. “That boy… Kristoff, was it? Man oh man, would he be in trouble if I didn’t already have a boyfriend!”

Both eyebrows shot up my forehead.  “Boyfriend?” That was news to me. “Since when?”

She froze mid-bite, shoulders stiffening and eyes going round. Then she snatched up her drink, slurping it down as her eyes shifted rapidly about. Then with a loud gulp, she at last let out a weak laugh, “It, uh… it’s new! Yeah, we… met… at the wedding! Sorry I didn’t tell you, I just didn’t want to say anything because I, er… felt bad! With, ya know, your love life all in the toilet and the bombed engagement and whatnot, so… heh…”

“Oh,” I averted my gaze with a tiny frown. At the wedding, huh? Was it someone from his side of the family? Or maybe a friend of his? Regardless, it didn’t really matter I supposed. I directed a soft smile her way, “I’m fine, really. There was no need for you to hold back. You know you can always tell me anything.”

“I know that!” she laughed, flicking one hand dismissively. “But please, it’s me. I have a new beau like every other week, so it’s hardly anything to stop the presses over! No, the real scoop here is what’s the deal with you and Lea? I wanna know everything!”

“Lea?” I creased my brow, making another quick visual sweep for the guy in question. Still no dice, but I did see Yuffie across the way playing a game of Darts with Meg and Terra. Though… could it still really be called Darts when the projectiles being used were more of those little ninja stars? Either way, it came as little to no shock when next a scowling Leon could be glimpsed making a beeline for the trio. “What about Lea?”

“Don’t play coy! I saw you two getting all cozy-like in this booth here all by yourselves just a minute ago!” her eyebrows waggled.

I scoffed. “There was nothing cozy about it. We were just talking.”

“And smiling. Like, a lot.”

“So? People smile when they talk.”

Anna rolled her eyes. “Yeah, people. You don’t. Except for with me and Ray-Ray.  Plus,” and here she got in my face, jabbed a finger into my collarbone and paused with all the drama of Sherlock Holmes about to reveal the key piece of evidence at the climax of an epic murder mystery.  “...you laughed.”

Eyelids drooping, I grumbled, “I laugh all the time.”

“Nu-uh! And not like this, you don’t! Gawd, it’s been… I don’t even know how long since I heard a noise like that out of you. You can’t fool me, there’s definitely something between you two. A… a spark!”

A half groan, half huff escaped me. Anna was always like this. She’d binged one too many romantic comedies in her as of yet short existence on this earth. I’d been considering telling her about the Kissident, but now? Bad idea. Like, in all the history of bad ideas, it would just be the absolute worst. She’d have a field day with that one. Better to keep it on the hush-hush for the time being. “There is no spark! There’s not even a… a flicker! Or a glimmer! Or a glint! Not even a fizzle, okay? We’re just friends. Besides, I just broke up with a fiancé not even a month ago, so alleged sparks are the furthest thing from my mind, understand?

“Methinks the lady doth protest too much,” she slyly brought the Golden Chocobo back up to her lips.

Eyes narrowing dangerously, I cracked my knuckles, “Methinks if the little sister doth enjoy breathing, she’ll knoweth when to zip it.”

“Methinks the little sister is zipping it forthwith!” Anna chirped with a two finger salute. There was a lull as she plucked another fry to give it a nibble. Then, “Sis, can I just tell you how amazing this is?”

My head dipped to one side. “What is?”

“This!” Her arms spread out wide before bringing both hands in to gesture at me, “You! Being out in the real world! Making it on your own! Meeting new people! Having a job! All of it! You’re different! It’s a good different! And this is just the start too, I can already see it, you’re gonna do great things. I’m so proud of you,” she cooed, pinching my cheek.

I swat her hand away, “Great things? Please, Anna… I scoop ice cream at a mall.”

“Yeah, for now! But that alone was a huge step for you. I mean, c’mon, if someone had told you a year ago that you’d be out from under Mom and Dad’s tyrannical thumbs and doing the whole independent thing, you’d probably would’ve just thought that person was spouting crazy talk.”

“I suppose that’s true,” I murmured, feeling the hint of a grin pulling at one side of my mouth. “I guess… I never knew what I was really capable of.”

“Well, now you’ve had just the kick in the rear you needed to find out!” Her smirk then slowly faded into a tiny grimace. “Listen… I’m so sorry about what happened. If I’d known how unhappy you were, I never would’ve let you get all the way up to the day of wedding bells before-”

“No, it’s okay. You don’t have to apologize,” I shook my head, putting my hand on top of hers. “It wasn’t your job to save me, it was mine. I just… should have done something about it sooner. Then maybe things wouldn’t be the disaster zone I imagine they are now back at home,” I puffed out a heavy sigh.

Anna laughed, “You got that right! Mom and Dad? Still hella pissed! So any thoughts on when you’re gonna talk to them?” I winced, looking away. She hastily tacked on, “No rush or anything! And you don’t have to worry about me spilling the beans to them either about where you’re laying low! Take all the time you need. I just think-”

“Sorry to interrupt ladies!” We both jumped slightly in our seats as Lea made a sudden reappearance, skidding to a stop beside our table, eyes bright and ear-to-ear grin splitting his face in two. “But I’m gonna need to borrow El here for a minute!”

“Of course!” Anna giggled, standing up from the booth to clear a path out for me. “She’s all yours!”

Um… excuse me?

Don’t I get a say in this?

“Thank you!” he singsonged before snatching my hands in his and yanking me up out of the booth and onto my feet. “Come on, we’re up next!”

Up? Up where?

He started to turn but stopped, tapping a finger to his pursed lips. Then the smile was back with a vengeance as he picked up the Shiva and shoved it into my hand. “Lil liquid courage never hurt!” he gave a firm nod before taking my other hand in his once again and sprinting off, me doing my best not to spill the drink as I stumbled and tripped after him.

I had a bad feeling about this.

“Where are we going?” I called out as we weaved a path through the crush of people, ignoring the soft, weird buzz I was feeling where my fingers were interlaced with his.

Not breaking stride, he turned his head just enough to glance at me out of the corner of his gaze, eyes crinkled. “You’ll see.”

My bad feeling now had an added side of gut-wrenching dread thrown in on the house.

Particularly because I was pretty sure we were heading straight for the-

“Next up on the karaoke stage,” a female voice suddenly rang out over the speakers high above while the music coming from the jukebox faded away, “we have Elsa and Lea here to sing a duet for us! Please welcome them with a round of applause, everyone!”

The room erupted in cheers and clapping as we at last broke out of the dense crowd to find ourselves directly in front of the stage.

Aka my worst nightmare.

Well… at least at the moment.

My nightmares had a tendency to pass around the highly coveted and sought after “Worst” title, depending on which one was most pressing at any given second of the day.

There wasn’t that much to it. The stage was made of dark, polished hardwood with maroon, heavy velvet curtains hanging behind it to decorate the back wall. There were a couple of stands for the cordless mics accompanied by a lone barstool between them. And of course, the karaoke machine itself, front and center with a large screen on top of it for displaying the lyrics. As a whole, it was almost deceptively innocent looking in its simplicity.

But I knew better.

I’m on to you, you miniature torture chamber cleverly disguised as fun for the whole family.

“Surprise!” Lea beamed down at me. Then another tug at my arm and I was staggering to keep up once more as he brought me around to one side of the stage and up its stairs. I tried to put on the brakes, but my legs had turned to jelly, rendering them useless. Instead, it was all I could to stammer and splutter as he chipperly explained, “So as far as available songs go, it was slim pickings when it came to duets, nothing but cheesy love songs. But I think I picked the best one of the bunch, super energetic, should be loads of fun and-”

“No!” I at last managed to get out, jerking my hand free, whirling on my heel and marching back down those steps at warp speed.

He was quick to follow, grab me by my shoulders, spin me back around and guide me up again, still with that stupid grin in place. “Aw, c’mon! You asked me for ideas on new things for you to try! So here you go!”

“Who says I haven’t done this before?” I hissed, feet now scraping across the stage as he slid me along it.

Lea snerked through his nose. “I took a wild guess.”

“That was awfully presumptuous of you.”

“So what, you telling me you’ve sung karaoke?”

“No, but that doesn’t make you any less presumptuous!”

We came to a stop now next to the mics. He stepped in front of me and bent down to my eye level, his hands still firmly gripping my upper arms to keep me from bolting. “Come on, El! Do it for me! As a favor to a friend!”

I shot him a deadpan look. “Fun fact: we’re no longer friends.”

“Since when?”

“Since ten seconds ago when you dragged me up here against my will.”

“Pfft, you don’t mean that,” he finally released me, ruffling my bangs and rolling his eyes before stepping over to the mics, unblocking my field of vision. That’s when I saw it.

All.

Those.

People.

Watching. Murmuring. Waiting. I’d already known the bar was packed, but now, up here, sensing every single last one of those eyes on me, the place seemed to be all but bursting. There were just… just so many! I-

Wait, was the crowd shrinking? And not as is thinning out, but were the people actually getting... smaller?

“Oof!” I wheezed out a surprised grunt as my back collided with something.

Oh.

That’d explain it.

Apparently without me even realizing it, my feet had taken it upon themselves to back me away from the edge of the stage, away from the people and straight into the curtained wall behind me. My hand started groping about, looking for the edge of said curtain, latching on when I found it and sweeping it out for me to hide behind. Everything went dark.

I am stealth.

A ghost.

A ninja.

Sneakiness personified.

Unseeable, unknowable, and-

The curtain whipped away and I winced as light returned, revealing Lea standing before me. He laughed, “There you are!”

I squeaked, grabbed the curtains and yanked them in front of me once more.

Now where was I? Ah, that’s right… ahem! Unseeable, un-

The velvet curtain flew to the side once more and Lea hooked his hand in my elbow, pulling me out and back towards the karaoke machine. “Trust me, you’ll be fine!  You got nothing to worry about! I’ll be there the whole time, hamming it up and just in general making a big idiot outta myself, so no one's even gonna be looking at you. All you gotta do is stand there and sing your parts when they come up, 'kay? Song’s super short too, so it’ll be over before ya know it!”

My lips parted to tell him exactly where he could take his “super short song” and stick it, but was interrupted by the spotlights suddenly flicking on. One zeroed in on Lea, the other blasted me like a paralyzing ray and I just stood there, eyes wide and unblinking, mouth hanging open and alcoholic beverage still in hand.

Another wave of applause went up for us as Lea tossed me a mic. Frozen stiff, I made no move to catch it, instead just watching it dumbly as it arced up through the air before streaking straight down in front of me to clatter against the stage. He snorted, bent down to pick it up and put it in my free hand, pressing my numb fingers to close around it before he moved to stand in front of the other mic.

My breathing was shallow, my heart was a jackhammer and my feet no longer seemed to work, now just glued to this spot.

Oh god, was this really happening?

 That’s when the music started.

Apparently, yes. Yes it was.

The tune was led in by a quirky, rubbery bassline and a playful piano. Wait… I knew this song. Yeah, it was from a musical. The one full of leather jackets, summer lovin’ and grease lightning. Musicals were a good thing. Musicals were a thing I knew. Kind of a guilty pleasure of mine. Used to sing along with them all when I was little. It could actually be considered kind of pathetic, the sheer percentage of my brain that was still to this day crammed full of all the words to famous Broadway hits.

All that said though… it did absolute friggin’ zilch to calm me down.

“I got chills, they’re multiplying,” Lea started off, dipping his mic stand dangerously low and giving it a wide sweep around before straightening back up and removing the mic from the base. He was no Travolta, but his voice actually wasn’t half bad. “And I’m losing control,” he sang on, spinning on one foot once, twice, three times before abruptly stopping to point at me with a smirk, working some hip action. “Cuz the power you’re supplying… it’s electrifying!” His whole body spasmed from head to toe as he fell to his knees then full on faceplanted at my feet, causing me to jolt back a step.

 ...hamming it up? Please, more like going whole hog! Jeez!

My part was coming up in about five seconds. I could hardly hear the music anymore over the thundering of my heart or the hiss of breath hyperventilating in and out of my nose. That’s when it happened again.

Everyone and everything around me was suddenly in slo-mo.

Man, I really needed to get a handle over my powers of time control!

It was in this uncanny second of my wildly burgeoning mutant ability (ha, if only) that I spotted them. Rayne and Anna, in the front row of the crowd with big smiles to root me on. As I locked eyes with one then the other, my sister gave me an excited nod of encouragement while my roommate was mouthing something to me. Couldn’t be sure, but it looked suspiciously like the words ‘comfort zone.’

Then I looked down at my hand holding the Shiva.

...liquid courage, huh?

...fine. Let’s do this.

Nostrils flaring, I raised the drink to my mouth, knocking back several gulps before slamming the glass down on top of the barstool. Still shaking, I jerked the mic up to my lips, knuckles white around the handle. Like a dam bursting, the words started flooding out before I could even think them. “You better shape up,” oh gosh, was that a quiver I heard in my voice? My free hand down by my hip clenched tightly. “Cuz I need a man, and my heart is set on you.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Lea still flat on the floor but now propped up on his elbows and gawking at me. I looked away, heat flooding my face. Come on now, I know it’d been a while since I last sang so I was rusty, but I couldn’t be that bad. Stubbornness flaring, I took a deep breath and continued, words stronger now, “You better shape up! You better understand to my heart I must be true…”

“Nothing left, nothing left for me to do,” Lea came back in with a fierce grin as he scrambled up onto his feet. “You’re the one that I want!” we both sang the chorus as he landed to my right, doing the iconic dance from the scene in the movie, with a thumb hooked in the waist of his pants and swinging his hips to and fro. “Oo-oo-oo, honey, the one that I want!” In a shuffling side-gallop, he passed by in front of me to my other side and repeated the move. “Oo-oo-oo, honey, the one that I want!” Again with the side-gallop, this time behind me, and again with the little jig. I was biting back a smile. Well, at least he was true to his word… he really was making a big idiot out of himself. It was getting harder to stay mad at him. Harder… but not impossible. “Oo-oo-oo, the one I need, oh yes indeed!”

Lea now moved several steps over to his side of the stage, giving me room as the song shifted in preparation for the second verse that I was going to be starting off. I tensed, spine ramrod straight as I recalled what the next lines out of my mouth were going to be. Feeling my blush creeping all the way down to my toes, I wrung the mic in both my hands now as I stiffly brought it back up and squeezed my eyes shut. “If you’re feeling affection,” I wasn’t here, I wasn’t me, “you’re too shy to convey.” No, I was Olivia Newton-John at the school carnival, oozing confidence in a smoking, skin-tight outfit showing off her killer bod. “Meditate in my direction.” Oof, the next part. How did Olivia pull off that breathy purr? Maybe something like, “Feel your way.”

Harsh feedback screeched through the speakers, making my eyes snap back open. Apparently it had come from Lea’s mic, which he was clumsily fumbling to keep from dropping it. Now having it firmly back in grip, he brought it back up in time to croak out, “I better shape up!” He cleared his throat, banging a fist to his chest and now looking a little red in the face. I guess all that prancing around must have been catching up to him. “Cuz you need a man…”

“I need a man who can keep me satisfied,” I sang back, quirking an eyebrow at him.

Whatever his malfunction had been, he was now bouncing back, face brightening as he ran into a knee-slide, stretching a hand up towards me, “I better shape up if I’m gonna prove-”

“You better prove,” I rolled my eyes and shook my head at his antics, “that my faith is justified.”

“Are you sure?” he asked, hopping back up before my voice joined with his, “Yes, I’m sure deep down inside! You’re the one that I want!” The chorus started again and Lea grabbed my hand, catching me off guard and twirling me into a spin. “Oo-oo-oo, honey, the one that I want!” Now he pulled me up against him, flashing me a cheeky grin as one hand wrapped around my waist and the other took hold of mine, mic sandwiched between them. “Oo-oo-oo, honey, the one that I want!” Unable to resist any longer, a laugh bubbled out of me as he swept us around in circles in time with the upbeat music, bringing his mic up between our lips whenever we needed to sing the next line. “Oo-oo-oo, the one I need, oh yes indeed!”

The chorus repeated a couple more times, Lea continuing to dance us about the stage the whole time. Once when I was able to catch a glimpse out into the audience, I even spotted Rayne and Anna busting a move themselves on top of one of the tables, Riku on the ground frantically gesturing for his wife to get down. When the song finally started to fade, the room erupted in applause and whistles. Lea released my waist, but didn’t let go of my hand, instead tugging me towards the edge of the stage. There he raised my arm up high before he bent into a flourishing bow for the adoring fans, pulling me down into one as well. As we both straightened back up, a smile tugged at my lips and I breathed a sigh of relief as my heart rate finally began to calm down.

I’d done it. I’d actually sung in front of all those people and lived to tell the tale.  And oddly, I was even... almost kind of giddy about it? It couldn’t be that I’d actually enjoyed that? No. No way. That was just the adrenaline talking as it still coursed through my body which was finally getting to relax now that the danger had passed. I was just happy it was over with! Yeah, that’s all it was. It had to be.

As the bar quieted down once more, Lea returned the mics to their holders before jumping down off the front of the stage and pivoting around to smirk up at me, “Damn, El, why didn’t you tell me you were packing a gorgeous set o’ pipes on you?”

There that blush was again, creeping back up my neck. I gave a soft harrumph, “Stop, I do n-”

I was startled into silence as he picked me up by the waist, my hands hastily going to his shoulders as he lowered me down off the stage and deposited me on the floor beside him.

Okay… so that happened.

“I’m serious!” he pulled his hands back, planting them on his own hips as he hunched forward slightly. “You’re trying to figure out what to do with your life, right? Well, I think we hit a ringer here! Ever consider being a singer?”

I turned my back on him with a snort and walked away, heading towards our booth. “Oh, sure. I’ll just have to hire professional wranglers to drag me kicking and screaming up to the mic for every performance.”

“Oh, c’mon, it wasn’t that bad, was it?” he caught up and fell into step beside me. “You had fun and really got into it, I could tell!”

Only because Lea had been distracting me the whole time. “It doesn’t matter either way, only fools try to make a career out of singing. Do you know how hard it is for most people to make it big in the music industry?”

“Yeah, but most people don’t have a voice like yours.”

I groaned, “Please, can we just drop it?”

“Fine, fine, dropping it,” he raised his hands in surrender.  Then, “So… are we friends again?”

I side-eyed him, wrinkling my nose. “...probationally.”

One corner of his mouth twitched upward and he slipped his hands into his pockets. “I’ll take it! And hey, at least something good came outta our lil musical adventure.”

I gave him a questioning look, to which he grinned wider.

“I got to dance with you after all.” 

Author's Note: For those who don't know it, the song they sang is called "You're the One That I Want" from the musical "Grease" - a rather problematic musical at that (as I discovered from rewatching the movie while writing this chapter after not having seen the movie in over a decade) but I still love this song and you can pry it from my cold, dead hands xD Also I may or may not have watched 50 (thousand) youtube videos of couples singing this song at karaoke for IMPORTANT RESEARCH reasons before writing up this chapter. I must say, just simply writing the karaoke scene felt almost as mortifying as if I'd actually had to go up on stage and physically sing the damn song myself! I don't normally write songs lyric for lyric in my stories, but I just figured with what an anxious bundle of nerves Elsa is in this story, it was kind of important not to just gloss over and hand-wavy the karaoke. So yeah, I don't usually write singing scenes, but hopefully this one turned out halfway okay? Anyhoo, on another note, Elsa is a lot better at this whole holding-a-conversation thing than she gives herself credit for… once she gets over her crippling anxiety at the very idea of stringing more than two words together! And lastly, I found a way to give Lea both his names in this fic, woooooooo!

Next chapter, this thrilling night out continues! What further adventures in Friday night drinks await our hermit heroine? Is a career in singing ACTUALLY on the table for consideration or will it forever remain a pipe dream? Will Elsa ever perfect her ninja skills, which seriously leave something to be desired currently? Stay tuned!

Thanks for reading, I super duper appreciate it! And an extra BIG thank you to those of you hit that like button last chapter, seeing that always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

[do-what-the-knight-tells-you]

So I saw a post on here talking about how, when you take the shit Geralt says in the TV series at face value, it’s unbelievably hurtful and cruel towards Jaskier, just, downright mean, and callous, and designed to make Jaskier feel he’s wasted two decades of his life.

But I hate that, because it makes me sad, and on a rewatch, I found an alternate take.

So whether Geralt is neurodivergent in a way we recognize clinically (ASD perhaps? I won’t address that here, but I love Autistic!geralt headcanons), or whether he’s just built himself a particularly abrasive method of interaction over 100 years of shit, prejudice, and abuse, his really rough, rude abrasive words towards Jaskier are not genuine.

And I would expect/choose to believe, that if Jaskier has continued their companionship over two decades, he has not only recognized this about Geralt, but decided he’s more or less okay with it.

So I had the thought particularly during the djinn episode– saw it pointed out somewhere, how un-comforting Geralt is when the elf-healer tells Jaskier the Djinn-curse can kill him. Jaskier turns, desperate, scared, says “fuck, Geralt!” and Geralt sort of awkwardly pats him on the back and says “yeah, we’re not gonna let that happen” in a fairly begrudging way, as if suggesting that the whole situation isn’t that big a deal.

So what if that response has less to do with not caring, with being callous towards Jaskier’s life and fear, and more with either a genuine awkwardness and discomfort with the idea of comforting someone, he really doesn’t know what to say, he’s not used to being a comfort (most ppl are scared enough of him that even when he rescues them, they’d still prefer he left than comfort them in any way), and he’s probably received very little comfort in his life, doesn’t know how to do it, and is barely experienced with the idea of admitting one might want or need it.

And/or, we see the candid, unemotional way he reacts to the ghoul bite in ep7, to the knowledge that he’s seconds from death. So clearly the smooth, stoic, sarcastic, unaffected thing is his usual method of handling scary shit. He doesn’t even raise his voice unless it might help (i.e. out-yelling Yennefer to be heard over the djinn-hurricane, hoping that he can persuade he to give up the really terrible course of action she’s on that’s gonna kill her).

So the other part of it could totally be a case of him downplaying the danger, trying not to think, speak, allude to, mention the danger, possibly as his own coping mechanism (a lot easier to be “fearless” when you repress the shit out of whatever might scare you. if you never let yourself think about the possibility that things might go horribly wrong, then it’s a lot easier to conduct yourself as if nothing bad might happen).

So when he awkwardly pats Jask on the back, distractedly, begrudgingly, patronizingly says, “yeah, we wont let that happen.” It’s genuine awkwardness, and/or a coping mechanism to not let himself think about how bad it is (focus on the solution, not the problem, solve this one, and then the next, etc… he’d do a good job surviving alone on Mars, I think), and/or an attempt to keep Jask calm by not validating his panic, like how if you don’t make a big deal out of a kid’s scraped knee, sometimes then the kid doesn’t panic either and it’s fine.

And likely Jaskier has been his companion long enough to know some of that, maybe even to actually be comforted by Geralt’s lack of panic. Imagine how goddamn frightening it’d be if your super brave/tough/stoic friend actually looked scared.

(the line, when the elf dude starts talking about how in love with Yennefer Geralt must be, when Geralt says “you’re making me uncomfortable?” It’s definitely a funny line, but also it’s possibly genuine. Geralt genuinely expressing himself)

And then later in the episode, Jaskier delivers that line about “wait, is this the moment you decide to finally care about someone other than yourself?” We literally saw him drop everything, ride across the countryside (putting you on Roach, which he never does), seek help from several unknown sources, including this sketchy sorceress chick (and he admits to her and the audience that his concern over saving Jask’s life was such that he A: skipped the opportunity to seek help for his tortuous insomnia issue and B: was more than a bit willing to sell himself into indentured servitude/ something that looked a bit like prostitution)…

Like, fuck off, it’s clear he cares an awful lot about you Jask, and you have to know that. so are YOU being cruel back? or, are you playing along with what Geralt seems to be comfortable with, caring about you so long as neither of you look at that straight-on, or make him talk about it.

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okay, so than the mountain-top divorce. like, Geralt’s p harsh through a lot of that episode, but there is a tiny bit of playfulness I think still in that dig about worthy travel companions. And if this is a method of talking to each other that they engage in regularly, that Jaskier willingly keeps subjecting himself to…

and then Jask comforts Geralt after the mountain crossing, and when he floats the bit about them traveling together again (maybe implying that these recent adventures are new-ish again, perhaps after a period of separation, perhaps Geralt is extra harsh… perhaps this is a normal-ish thing that Jask has noticed, that Geralt is always more brusque, more accidentally hurtful rather than just dry, right at the beginning or end of their travels together, a defense mechanism of sorts? protecting himself from the pain of separation he’s trying not to acknowledge even exists?) anyway, he floats the line, and I’m p sure Geralt nods.

Jaskier seems to know him pretty damn well.

So none of this makes what Geralt says not shitty, and not hurtful, but rather than let myself wallow in the idea that Jask is completely devastated, feels he’s wasted twenty years of his life on a person who is literally ready to throw him away…

Hopefully not. Hopefully he knows Geralt well enough not to… not to give him a pass, necessarily, Geralt def needs to learn from and atone for that really gross behavior… but enough to know that Geralt’s just very bad, unpracticed, and a bit oblivious when it comes to hurt feelings, to understand that Geralt’s just in a shitty toxic place, that it’s got nothing to do with Jask, that the best thing for all of them is for him to remove himself as a target and let Geralt sort his shit out in his own.

That Jask knows this is one of those times where he can trust his friend with his body, but not his feelings/heart.mind/energy, and he needs to take care of himself first.

So hurt, yeah, but not like devastated, knowing that Geralt didn’t mean his words, but did mean, in that moment, to hurt Jask genuinely and drive him off, not in the light-brusque-teasing way that they sometimes have between them. Knowing both that Geralt was reacting to Yennefer, to other hurts, not to Jask, but also knowing that Geralt was willing to put his own momentary vindictive satisfaction over Jaskier… and so knowing that is was time for them to part for a while, for his own sake. That pushing through at this time was gonna be more masochistic than beneficial or productive, so it was time to look after his own mental health.

Like, this is sort of a pattern I’ve seen in folks in the real world. There’s someone close to me who struggles with some nasty bipolar shit (he’s not found a good med combo for him yet, and even when he’s in a more healthy place, lots of his tools and learned behaviors are mostly crappy still from years of this barely coping while undiagnosed), and sometimes he’s cruel as hell, usually when he hates himself the most, and is lashing out partly in an attempt to get you to say nasty shit back, and justify both his resentment of you, and his belief that he is a worthless shitty person.

And when he’s in those periods, it behooves many of us to just… walk away. like, if you can be/are willing/able to be the person that supports someone through that kind of shit, that’s totes your call to make, and might be a really awesome thing for that person (and that’s where professional help and support can also be awesome! Ppl who have trained to be able to hear the bad shit without taking it personally, and to still be able to guide you to better tools afterwards!)

But sometimes, you also have to take your own health and energy and stuff into account and go “I know this person is being a cruel asshole because they are sick and/or hurting… but also I do not need to swallow the shit just cuz there’s an explanation. so imma peace out until they get their shit together a little more, and are gonna be less toxic/hurtful to me, stop taking it out on people. I can help them, maybe, but their mental health is NOT my sole responsibility, and I do a disservice to both of us if I decide it is, and abdicate personal responsibly for my OWN health in the process.” Put on your own mask first, and all that.

(I’ve seen this in alcoholics I know, as well, and the other side of that is letting them know “hey, I know you feel like you have no control, but one area where you do have some, is how you treat people. and if you’re acting like an asshole, then ppl won’t want to be treated that way. They aren’t leaving because You suck, they are leaving because Your Behavior sucks, and if you want to be around them in future, you should maybe work on your behavior. You are not inherently a Mean Person, but the things you do and say to people are Mean, and they don’t need to sit there and let themselves be abused” Like, it is possible to be ill, and make mistakes!, without being consistently cruel to folk.)

So, magical shenanigans and hissy-fits not a perfect analogy for BD, but it resonated a bit, so I figured I’d share