#currently unemployed

[mushroomwillow]

I guess if people see this and they have thoughts, lmk. I can’t guarantee that itd work in my situation, but I’d be willing to hear people out.

Ok I quit. Boss msgs me, asking if I’d be willing to do a leave of absence. I said I’d be ok with talking to her over a call.

However, I already went to her and explained I need time off. I can’t do the job due to mental and physical health. And a billion other reasons.

So please tell me, even tho you’ve been an incredible boss, how you’re going to convince me that causing trauma to a child is going to be worked around. How you’re going to magically have a solution to me being over worked.

I’m genuinely curious in the most bitter way.

I’ve figured out with my fiance that in order to pay my bills, I need at least $750 a month. Of course I also need groceries.

On his income alone, we could apply for food stamps. It won’t cover a ton, but it’ll cover a bit.

And as far as me making the $750, food delivery, donating plasma (which has other benefits of actually helping people) and babysitting. Hell there’s the little girl across from us I could talk to her mom about it. I could also walk dogs, they also have dogs, not saying they’ll be all for it, but it’s worth a shot. Who knows. There’s apps for it too.

And all of this I could do while still having my daughter when she comes back from her dad’s, and focus on school. It’s going to be hell. But maybe less of a hell than being forced to cause trauma, when I am literally getting my degree to help people with trauma.

I’m angry, I’m depressed. I’m impossibly anxious. Idk what to do with no education, physical and mental illness, and needing to provide for myself, my daughter, and helping my fiance.

I’ve googled and searched YouTube and Pinterest. Everything seems so redundant. Start a blog, do surveys, idk how that’d give me $750 a month. Hell idk if I can afford the gas to do food delivery considering gas is $4 a gallon.

[alexandraisyes]

I’ve never advertised my commissions on here actively but this is a new thing I wanna do while I’m working on my Sinker AU! Feel free to shoot me a message if you’re interested! And if not could you help me out and reblog this? It would mean a lot while I’m in between jobs!

[sh3nlong-promakh0s]

i want to be a voice actor or storyboarder so bad

but also i want to never work ever but just do that shiz for fun anyway

[abandoned-as-mustard]

why do i need an english degree to be a copyeditor. is it not enough to have had a lifelong career with the autism grammar police

[therapythoughtstogether]

Just wondering if I'll ever have a family...

If you happen to pass by my blog on a somewhat regular basis, you can all the that this weekend things are heavy on my soul. Well, heavier than usual...

I hear people talking about the upcoming Christmas and how they are going to celebrate with their families. It's not that this Christmas I won't have a Christmas tree for the first time in my life...it's very possible that I may not even have a safe place to stay.

Since I was little I always wanted to be a mom. People always said I'd be a great mom. I'm a teacher after all! My little students loved me and their parents always said that I was like a second mom to them.

I don't know if I'll ever find a person who loves me for who I am and wants to be with me without hurting me. I'm deeply traumatized by now. I'm afraid I'm "broken beyond repair". I don't know if I'll ever have children and the nice loving little family I've always dreamt of.

I know that right now my main concern is safety and survival, and preventing an unwanted pregnancy to the best of my abilities. But with the holidays approaching I'm afraid that dream will never come true.

[letthegrxxngirlgo]

Its not healthy for me here but I can’t survive on my own

[intotheelliwoods]

A well deserved rest for these guys 😌 <3 <3

[the-bot-named-r0z]

My derailleur got fucked up and I had to replace it, she shifts better than before

[wileycross]

SPOILER WARNING!

For a few seconds of Spy Another Day and for the first scene of the Spies are forever commentary, (definitely go watch both of those first if you can, they’re amazing) pls don’t click play if you don’t wanna be spoiled (it’s nothing big but it is a funny moment!)

Anyway, I laughed out loud when I saw the bananas falling! Then I thought “didn’t they mention this before” and went back to check, so proud of them for getting the budget for the bananas falling all these years later!

[tea-time-terrier]

Just a fish.

[trianglesimpfordpines]

ok so like 2 people said they wanted to see the "ford is the most realistic genius" post and that's all the encouragement i need. i'm probably gonna sound pretty full-of-myself on this post but that's just how it be like sometimes.

a lot of the time, "intelligence" is assumed to mean "knows more things." fictional characters who are supposed to be geniuses typically just...miraculously Know information they have no real way of acquiring, anticipate events that cannot reasonably anticipated, or every other character just suddenly gets stupid when the genius character is around so that the "genius" character just doing the logical thing comes off as particularly smart.

so you have a character who supposedly has a really high iq, but in practice they may as well be psychic.

as someone who actually has an iq of 147 (bear with me, because this isn't a flexing post), being "really intelligent" does not mean Just Knowing Things. what it means is that someone who's "smart" (in the traditional sense) can process more information, draw more conclusions, and do so faster than most people. it also usually means being really good at rationalizing things. so if you're someone who's well-adjusted and well-informed, that can definitely look like knowing all the right answers...but if you're someone who's not well-adjusted or well-informed, it can, if anything, make you even wronger. you get better at rationalizing your mistakes and digging yourself in deeper. and heaven help you if you have paranoid tendencies, because it's that much harder to convince someone they're being irrational when they're on a whole 'nother level of finding information to back up their irrationality.

ford is a genius. he learns incredibly fast and thoroughly. but he's also constrained by the information he has available to him, and by his own biases and past trauma and people issues.

that one writing advice post that made the rounds saying that a character's biggest flaw is usually their biggest strength in the wrong situation is very true of people who are very intelligent. it's why, for example, you'll sometimes see doctors, academics, experts buy into conspiracy theories. it's not because they're stupid; it's because they're smart enough to recontextualize all their knowledge to support their biases and beliefs.

and so many people do not understand this because they still think of "intelligence" as "knowing & being right about everything." so you get people arguing that ford isn't really a genius, because he was wrong and he made mistakes. but in my opinion, the mistakes he makes make perfect sense because he's a genius. that kind of recklessness is exactly what you get when you combine abnormally high iq with ford's myriad of personal issues. you get someone who's great at rationalizing, great at taking in information, and great at finding surprisingly well-thought-out reasons why their paranoia and antisocial tendencies are totally just the rational response.

think of it this way; the smartest people alive in the medieval era believed in the miasma theory. they weren't too stupid to understand what bacteria and viruses are; they just didn't have the tools needed to observe them. so they came up with a theory based on the information they did know, wrote essays and papers about it, made medical practices based on it...and it was completely incorrect, because genius without correct information leads to spectacular and very well-thought-out mistakes.

anyway, all this to say, as someone who could nominally be considered a "genius" but has been hella wrong about a lot of things in my life, i think ford is an incredibly realistic take on what most "geniuses" are really like. impressive in the right situations, not so much in the wrong ones, and very much not magical beings capable of mysteriously knowing all the correct information because they're Just That Smart. and very much not immune to emotional and personal issues getting in the way.

thanks for coming to my "i-just-slept-for-20-hours-and-my-brain-is-a-bit-scrambled-right-now" ted talk

[rainingskeletons]

Hey everyone! Just a little heads up that posts are gonna be really sporadic in the next 2 months (even more than usual sorry!)

I can't garentee that I'll be able to get much free time to draw since lots of stuff happening in my irl and I'm in a deep motivation dip right now buuut it won't last forever! things should will return to normal soon. I'm so excited for the things happening in CH 5 but it's going to have to wait a bit longer.

As always I am overwhelmed with the love you guys share for this AU, you've made sharing this story so fun. Thank you!

[therapythoughtstogether]

I feel unloveable...

I've struggled with self esteem and self worth for long. But with all the things that have happened over the last weeks and are still happening, I feel like I lost all the value in me.

I know that everyone has value as a human, as a person...except for me...I feel like no one can love me, I'm just used for other people's pleasure.

I feel like without an income, I have no value. Something that I would never tell to any other unemployed person. I'm so depressed and anxious that I cannot be a good company.

I'm afraid I will never be cute again. I used to take care of myself, and now I struggle to brush my teeth and hair. I don't have any self care products because I cannot afford them. I cannot go for walks alone because I don't have the key to this place, so mostly I'm alone in the room for hours each days, and I go somewhere with this guy once a week o Sundays. Even then I don't want to go... I cannot do yoga because I don't even have a mat now...

I do my best not to drink alcohol, but sometimes reality is too painful and I do end up drinking. I cannot choose what I'm given to eat, and it's lots of my fear foods. My eating habits are erratic and I turn to food for comfort. I'm gaining weight and it makes my body dysmorphia so much worse. I cannot face my reflection...

As I said before, I feel like my spirit is broken, my will is withering, my light is fading...

I know right now is just survival. But I actually do want to be loved. I honestly do want to be taken care of. I want someone to brush my hair and hold me. I want a friend to go for walks. I want to do face masks again and choose what I ca eat within what I can afford.

I don't think anyone can lie me anymore. I'm fighting hard to stay alive.

[5qui99l3draws]

one fairysona with a pigeon friend for @pfandghoul!

commission info here

bonus thumbnails because they're cute: