#I have a useless degree
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I’m an equal distance from 20 as I am to 30 rn, and while I know 30 isn’t very old it still feels scary. I’ve been an adult for 7 years and have nothing to show for it besides a string of bad decisions and wasted time.
#I have a useless degree#still live in my dads house#currently unemployed#what am I even doing#like I’m going back to school in the fall to complete my bachelors so I can have a slightly less useless degree#since a bachelors opens doors that an associates degree does not#what am I doing#never been in a serious relationship#never lived on my own#don’t have a car#spent 7 years to decide on a careeer path and I’m still not sure about it
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I think people forget that I moonlight as a historian and I'm fluent in two dead languages
#dispatches#original content? on this blog?#kiri rambles#discourse related#in light of recent events#no I'm not telling you which ones#I'm not just an ass on the internet and your local explosives expert#I have a useless degree#I use it to make things and cook weird dishes
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son of neptune is also funny because the characters have no significant issue with each other. every other previous mainline book involves some kind of tense dynamic with the questing characters. in tlt it's percy and annabeth. in som annabeth hates tyson and percy is defensive of him whilst trying to swallow the fact that he's embarrassed to have a monster for a brother. in ttc percy and thalia and zoë are all fighting with each other constantly. in botl percy is back to childish quarreling with annabeth over the luke/rachel stuff + grover is scared of tyson + annabeth is intensely antagonistic towards rachel. and in tlo percy and annabeth are bickering again + percy strangles nico for lying to him. even jason and piper (though jason is still immediately jumping off a cliff to save her whilst unaware that he can fly) have instant tension in their dynamic that runs through the veins of tlh and beyond + leo struggles with feeling like a third wheel + piper is worried about betraying them for her father and that impacts the way she interacts with them
and then son of neptune rolls around and percy is immediately just like Wow you two are just awesome. I know we just met but we're besties now. and frank and hazel both already like + know each other and they immediately stick their necks out for percy and like him. like this has never happened in any other book before. they don't clash with each other At All. they have uncomplicated affection for each other in all directions of their trio and that kindness and affection is the soul of son of neptune. they are just so so friendly to one another and the only source of awkwardness among the main characters is frank's crush on hazel since the start of the book, a crush that barely even results in any real tension or conflict because they're still best friends from the jump and hazel likes him too, she's just a lot less willing to do anything about it because she hates herself and thinks gonna die by the end of the week
#some would say that this makes son a boring book and I'm never going to tell someone they're wrong for finding something#boring because that's 100% a personal taste thing. but imo the extreme degree of internal conflict#that all three characters have makes up for it. percy has never been angstier. hazel is convinced she only has a few days left to live#+ has the most tragic backstory in the franchise. frank is convinced of his own uselessness and has no goddamn#idea how he's going to LEAD a quest when he literally just got to camp jupiter and his mom JUST died and then his grandma dies too#everyone is so so depressed. they really love each other through it tho. I think that's neat#baye.txt#pjo#hazel levesque#frank zhang#percy jackson#son of neptune#heroes of olympus
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some business to take care of
#i was tempted to caption this as she was a skater boy and she was also another skater boy but#duck scribbles#midoyuzu#enstars#whats up guys im being embarrassing again on main#been wanting a new phone wallpaper and this was born. its the lesbian version though im not showing that#midori takamine#yuzuru fushimi#yuzumido#ensemble stars#also have additional doodles that r kind of corny and im too ashamed to add into the main post so i might add on a reblog or maybe not#midterms were so awful i had to keep reminding myself i can go ham drawing whatever i want once im done. and naturally its this#anyways ive always liked midos city rider fit it suits her so well#always wanted to find a good one to pair w it and the wink killer 2nd half xscout was toooo good i was inspired immediately#finally could use this good ref pic ive had saved since forever i need to draw backgrounds more too it was rather fun somehow#mental state has been yoyoing an insane degree lately like come on i dont need to be reminded i am a useless hunk of meat every other day#with nothing good going for them. college is amazing at reminding me of such god bless#i have bad tendencies to self isolate behind the excuse of concentrating that i am trying to fix . but its hard to get back when i do#not to mention the entire Big Event happening over in good ol amerika serikat!!! my apathy is naturally immense#but whats some peace of mind here and there idk. im gonna read yuri
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as some of u know already i have a test tomorrow in my anatomy class. i’ve never studied this hard for anything in my life and i still know nothing. i have a bachelors degree in three separate fields, i graduated with college magna cum laude with separate honors in two of my majors, i took 7 ap exams, i took the sat, i have a certification that is incredibly hard to get. i have never been more stressed for an exam in my life. i know too much and also nothing at all. how do you stem people do this in like four classes at once.
#things that have made me realize my college degree is useless: this class#not a tag#from saph#ive given up and if i know it i know it if i don’t i don’t#it was something like 435 locafions of things plus other shit i had to memorize#aa#only got 3 Bs in my whole college career but i’ll be over the moon with a b on this
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Vi is gifted kid burnout but in the english major way
#she’s the best characterization I’ve seen of gifted kid burnout outside of super-genius characters#like. as a burnt out gifted kid by legal designation. she is me#trying to succeed at everything because that’s what you’re told to do or what you think needs to be done to be worth anything to anyone#being rigid to change because it’s not being done right but at the same time accepting change so long as people stay with you#and also how that ties in with being an eldest sibling#because ik folks love the whole ‘gifted kid jinx’ thing (not me but ya’ll do you) but ya’ll—#YA’LL DO NOT UNDERSTAND MY NEED FOR BURNT OUT ACADEMIC VI—#because Vi never got the chance to be a kid and learn and grow and find what she actually enjoyed in the world outside of the last drop crew#but look at her. the way she speaks and the way she tried to teach powder the lessons she earned the hard way in the gentlest way possible#in the way she so desperately clings on to people and memories#my girl would be a WRITER#my girl would be writing poetry drunk in her shitty basement apartment after hooking up with a girl#my girl would be writing novellas in prison and getting her degree#because you know she sees the world like a romantic. her world is art and emotion and devotion. to her family. to anything she cares about#i need more literary! student vi. i need more academic vi. i need more grudging debate-team captain vi#i need vi getting her own place and having an extensive book collection that she develops because of the loneliness#Her gkb is going from a leader & soldier to someone who could be useful regardless to someone who is useless & being okay w/ it ->#to being needed again and not knowing how to handle it but knowing she refuses to fuck it up this time#GIVE ME VI W/ MY GIFTED KID ARCCCCCC#this probs makes no sense and is like 4 tangents but I’ll expand on it later ‘cause im tired#coherency is for losers and the well-rested#vi arcane#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane season two#vi
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I don't remember if you answered this question, but did you go to art school or are you self-taught? Have you studied from YouTube videos?
nah, I never did art school. I learned a few things from books when I was a kid and got signed up for a short summer art class one time, since I was thinking about being a professional artist and my parents were trying to help me along. I learned how to use digital art programs from tutorials when I was a teenager, but I haven't used tutorials much besides that. pretty much everything I know has been from observing other artists online and experimenting. so yeah, I guess that means I'm self-taught, haha.
I went to school for music and vocal performance, but I could tell a long story about the university I went to, how they weren't really qualified to train musicians and how I dropped out. I've already been working professionally as a performer for 7 years, working with a private teacher and as a teacher myself, and I have tons of experience that I never would've gotten at school, so it's all working out really well.
#this is a tirade but I think that college singing programs are generally pretty flawed#there are educational elements to being a singer but experience is SUPER important and colleges give you next to no experience#and you're so freaking busy in college that you have zero time or energy to even practice your craft#like the reason young artist programs exist is because they don't do that stuff in college#people spend a load of money on a college education that will make them fill their degree with useless GEs and electives#and then they have to spend even more money getting actual necessary stage experience#uh oh. I'm having opinions again#barring that college kind of sucked for me specifically lol#school and I didn't get along#asks
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my dreams have grown smaller and kinder and far more difficult
#robin processes emotions on main#(calm with rage. oceanlike. I hate the American system. 大嫌い)#I'm currently thinking about jobs and how I really just want to work in the local independent thrift store or somewhere similar#even though I know my grandparents want me to seek prestige and the white middle class#I don't want to be a part of that#not that I probably COULD be part of that. not with my useless college degree and my autism. but anyway#living with my parents for cheap rent might enable me to spend some years working part time and not destroying my own soul#but I don't want to be dependent on my parents forever#I want to have a home to share with others I want to be a host#also my parents and I have some quite different views... simply put I'm closeted and I want to live in a house not a closet#but is that achievable? time will tell#time will tell!! and I will do my best to live kindly and fully even if I never make it to where I want to be#even if I make false starts and have to start over. even if there's periods of stagnation I will keep standing up and going on#as long as I can
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I LIKE FINDING OUT INFORMATION!!!
#takes a hit of wikipedia. we all have vices hon (i say. my voice tired raspy and full of wisdom). you'll get it when you're older#they teach you things in school but that's the kiddy stuff. if you're not careful you're gonna wind up like me.#stuffing your head full of useless minutiae from the internet. contemplating getting more degrees.#high school don't prepare ya for the real hard stuff. the nasty stuff. that's what the school of life is for#i know details about minor internet celebrities and irregular verb conjugations and fictional universes that no one even cares about#(takes another drag of wikipedia) but you'll find out eventually kid. you'll find out.#that's what i did. i found out. and then i nevah quit
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last batch of doodles from this semester. officially half way done w/ bachelor’s 💪💪
#i have an associates degree now. which im pretty sure beyond showing u can do two years of college is useless. but i do have it#doodle break#xephna#yogslash#yogshipping#xephos#lalna#deerphos#twilight forest au
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i love watching a new show and being like holy shit that actor was on doctor who! and that one! and this one! and that actor hasnt been on doctor who but theyre married to someone who has!
#so fun#i also like playing degrees of separation with dw if i watching something that has no dw actors in it#its actually extremely easy (especially when you have a brain thats wired to remember stupid useless bullshit)#.txt#doctor who
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you know i act very hee hee ha ha about it but sometimes being in the humanities is very scary when all anybody talks about is how you're really dumb if you pursue a humanities degree and how there's no way that jobs exist in the field that you love and that it's not worthwhile to do literally anything but stem. even though i know this isn't true obviously especially bc i'm surrounded daily by people who disprove this but damn........... can we stop being so mean :(
#is it naive to think that if you just do what you love and try your best things will work out? maybe but i don't gaf#bc like what else are you supposed to do??????? i've never understood the narrative that if you suffer through a degree and a job that you#don't like purely for money that somehow the rest of your life will just fall into place and you'll manage to be happy#you know what. i actually think that THAT'S naive.#like maybe some people can live like that but i simply couldn't . so i'll take my chances with my 'useless' degree bc at least i don't want#to kms.#also it's literally just a lie that there are no jobs for anything other than stem like sure maybe not if you want to guaranteed make a#million dollars. but if you're normal that's just not true. and i know this bc i know so many people that have jobs that people don't even#know exist. but are doing important work AND they're happy#crazy stuff huh. so i have to believe that it'll go that way for me bc there's just no other option#so actually i'm back to being hee hee ha ha about it bc i've decided that it's fine.#and you're a bitter jaded hater if you believe otherwise
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you have to go to uni otherwise your life will go nowhere why would you go to uni these days the trades are dying we need more people in the trades no no we don't want more women in the trades we need more doctors nurses teachers so you have to get a degree or multiple degrees why are you complaining about debt you chose to do this you have to get at LEAST a masters degree because bachelors are basically useless they're handing degrees out like sweets these days you shouldn't go to uni if you can't afford it you have to get good grades at a level to get anywhere wait you don't want to go to uni? then what the fuck do you expect from life? student loans are fine they're not like other debt the highest student loan debt is £230,000 you'll be repaying it for your whole life there are so many useless degrees they need to get rid of them STEM is the way to go why is art and literature and music so bad these days the top earners at unis are on six figure salaries your student loan interest will go up year on year and btw we are really looking for someone with a higher level of education for this entry level position
#SCREAM BITING KILLING FUCK THE TORY LIB DEM COALITION#starmer if u do one thing get RID of student debt PLEASE#im sooo stressed like i have one more year of this degree to do and i WILL do it#but the amount of debt i'll have afterwards + interest....insane fr#i hate it when people say 'uni is useless/theyre letting too many people who get bad grades into uni/if you cant afford it then dont go!'#like why do you want to exclude working and lower middle class students even more???#oh yeah lets just let universities be attended by private school students only. i mean they get the highest grades so dont they deserve it!#uk politics
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Quick what's a career i can get where everyone will be so nice to me and i can work at my quiet little desk and nobody yells at me and its relaxing and then i can go home and it also pays me a billion dollars
I have a ba in accounting if that helps
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graduation was technically yesterday but i didn't go bc im hashtag cool and hashtag apathetic about the whole thing but that means i am no longer a student anymore which means i can't even lie to people and say i have exams to study for when i'm avoiding them nooooo
#ugh it's whatever. i'll just tell people to their faces that i dont want to speak to them bc they suck ass#anyway i want my diploma in fhe mail pls#gimme the paper pls. physical proof that i finished school instead of killing myself pls. i also wanna gloat abt it bc i graduated at#a younger age than eveyone else bc i have a desperate need to be better than other people and for them to feel inferior to me don't quote me#on that. also i want to set it on fire#i have been advised against this but i actually hate everything and everyone and my stupid useless fucking degree that will only be useful#if i go back to fucking school which pisses me off so fucking bad but again that need to feel superior i need to get a doctorate but also#fuck everyone and everything and my stupid baka life and also ough i gotta sort out my plans for grad school /sobbing /killingmyself
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“Autism is a superpower” mfs when you show them this




#alastair campbell#tony blair#nulab#can’t believe I don’t even do a politics degree#I’ve literally read all those books#do you know how much useless knowledge I now have?
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