#cucking I guess?

[growth-opportunities]

You can still remember a time when your friend Anna was flat as a board, though it seems you're the only one. She had been your best friend growing up, not that she did a lot of growing. Puberty gave her a few inches in height and moved on to bless others, leaving her a lamentable AA. On the one hand, you tried to console her by telling her that she could still be sexy without huge tits, but on the other, it was exciting in a way to hear her talking about busty women with intense envy. She'd send you pictures of women on Instagram and TikToks of women bouncing their tits in front of the camera, saying that she wanted to make them look small, all while half-teasing you for the fact that you probably jerk-off to what she sends you.

But there was one thing she wouldn't budge on.

"Nuh uh, no way. My personality wouldn't change that much. I'd still be hanging out with you and playing video games and wearing baggy sweatshirts. Though maybe not as baggy." Anna grabbed the front of her sweatshirt and pulled it forward, demonstrating just how much space she planned on filling. "You won't catch me dead doing one of those stupid dances. I'd still be me! Just, y'know, with massive bahonkadonkers!"

In hindsight, you probably should have been more careful with your wish. Who knew that magic wands from shops that mysteriously appear in the mall and then disappear the next day could be so finicky? But your desire to have a best friend with mega tits won out and you didn't stop to think it through.

Now you have two sets of memories: one in which Anna grew up alongside you, flat as a board and a playful tomboy, bashfully flirting in her own way; and one in which Anna started blossoming early and quickly, skipping right over training bras entirely, eventually getting scooped up into the popular crowd as her curves drew mote attention than she had ever gotten in her old life, widening the gap between you and her until the friendship crumbled away. With no memory of her disdain for e-girls, Anna quickly became one herself, showing off her growing tits with just the barest bit of plausible deniability (though the ones where she squishes her tits together, makes direct eye-contact with the camera, and slowly counts down from ten are a harder to deny.)

At least she seems happier like this, even if she complains for her fans about how hard it is to go bra shopping and how she has to rest her gigantic boobs on her desk. And she's still providing you with plenty of jerk-off material. Albeit in a slightly different way.

[mirakurutaimu]

when you are seated at the dinner table.... is it in proper etiquette to suck the cock to your "left" , or to your "right" ? in this world, it is the person who sucks the first cock who decides the order in which the cocks should be sucked. my dream, johnny hoestar, is to be the one who "sucks the first cock". that’s right. i will "suck the first cock". for america

[lunarin64art]

That feeling when he can't stand to see you that way, no matter what you do, no matter what you say😩😭💔

[luuxxart]

suing robbie daymond for once again voicing a character that makes me sob my eyes out

[houseswife]

one of my favourite things that the house md writers ever did was balancing out the overwhelming Heterosexuality™ of huddy’s getting-together episode by adding in whatever the fuck you call this

[northernsuccubus]

Don’t just sit there watching, make yourself useful. Crawl over here and worship my feet while my date fucks me.

[homefryboy]

fry & leela: *basking in their love as they’re finally married*

zapp right next to them:

[yallemagne]

Seeing how we've established we want Morph and Erik friendship goals.

Morph: You know what. Screw this! I want out of this Jean, Maddie, Scott and Logan bullshit.

Morph: Scoot over Rogue! Let me sit on Erik's lap+

Erik: What?

Logan: WHAT?!

Morph: Come on Mags. We'd go great together. I'm bald. You're old, powerful and violent. I'd bring out the fun in you. You make me feel pretty

Erik:

Erik: You don't feel pretty?

Morph: If we don't make Rogue jealous. We'd definitely make the professor envious

Erik:

Erik: Okay now-

Morph: I'm not hearing a no!

Erik: I...am not saying a yes.

Logan: **rolls eyes*

Morph would soooo insert themselves into others' relationship drama. They're just so tired of basking in the angst of watching the man they love pine over the ultimate power couple: a duo who could only be wedged apart by a clone of one of them. Girls (gender neutral) just wanna have fun.

And they'd get so fucking into it. They're like "I'm sick of this baby garbage, I want some real drama. I'm gonna go fuck with the Magneto/Rouge/Gambit with a sprinkling of Chuck thing going on over there. And listen when I tell you: I'm going all the way. I was never able to chink the armour of Grey Summers and get between those two to stir the pot, but I'm playing multiple teams here, buddy, you just watch, I'm romancing all of you. You're all gonna be fighting over me by the end of this, and you won't even know where you started."

The whole team is watching on in horror like "this is worse than when they were being mind-controlled by Mister Sinister..."

(also I love Erik hearing Morph's pitch and only replying "...you don't feel pretty?" like he's already geared up to shower Morph with compliments after it's implied they're insecure. man is hooked.)

[satanic-fruitcake]

WHY ARE MY FAVOURITE CHARACTERS ALWAYS VOYEURS

[moocha-muses]

[serenescribe]

Hi! I saw ficlet frenzy was open so I'm jumping in! I'm a Jamil x Silver shipper and was wondering if you could do something where Jamil likes Silver but Kalim, innocently, keeps getting in the way, leading Jamil to wonder if Silver and Kalim like each other.

[✐] ficlet frenzy i've not written jamil very much before; this was quite fun!

“Jamil! I’ve been looking everywhere for you— oh, hi Silver!”

Jamil can only stifle a sigh as Kalim crashes into his conversation yet again. It certainly hasn’t been the first time it occurred, though he’s long since lost count of just how many times it’s happened again and again. Irritation and frustration flares within him as his narrowed eyes watch Kalim sweep Silver off into another tangent of a conversation, babbling on and on about something of little consequence that has captured his attention for the day.

He should be used to this by now. Kalim interrupting is nothing new. It’s nothing special; it happens all the time, as a matter of fact.

And yet, Jamil cannot help the exasperation that vexes him as he watches them. Kalim and Silver. Silver and Kalim. They’ve been friends ever since they landed in the same class together at the start of their second year, with Kalim sweeping Silver into a whirlwind of events, pulling him out of the tiny, closed-off circle of Diasomnia students he frequently spends his time with.

Prior to this, Jamil hadn’t paid Silver much mind beyond looking into him out of his duty towards Kalim’s safety. But after Halloween…

(Memories flicker to mind: the two of them, traversing a perilous Spectral Realm together. Bonding, just a little bit. The flicker of curiosity and desire to know more about Silver, interest piqued by the stories he tells him.)

He’s tried to spend some more time with Silver after that. Subtle invites to lunch together — lunches that always get interrupted by Kalim’s arrival. Asking him if he needs help with his studies, only to get crashed by Kalim bursting in, whining over how difficult a particular section of their homework is. Even when Jamil succeeds in catching Silver alone, his mood is often ruined when Silver asks him about his history with Kalim — out of an innocent curiosity, Jamil’s sure, but it doesn’t dissipate the annoyance that runs through him as he hears that name.

He simmers in resentment now as he watches the two of them talk, an ugly feeling coiling around his heart, hissing like a viper. Jealousy, that’s what it is; he envies the easygoing attitude Kalim wields with ease, the evident bond of friendship between them — a friendship Jamil cannot achieve, if only because Kalim and him are so colossally different, and he approaches Silver with an edge of uncertainty to his actions and words, his fluttering chest betraying his usual confidence and poise.

He has always lost, always coming in second to Kalim. And as Jamil watches the ghost of a smile grace Silver’s face, he narrows his eyes.

He’s destined to lose this game of love too, it seems.

(Has he already lost right from the very start? He hates thinking about that question, about the possibility that the answer to it is yes.)

[nerime]

saw this tweet and had to draw my warden and alistair. BEST sleeping position

[largishcat]

Laziest person you’ve ever met: im not unemployable in any way. i just think I should get a paycheck for staying in bed.

and they’re so right 👏 👏 👏 👏 fucking stay and slay queen give us nothing at all literally who cares 👏 👏 👏 the whole point of having a society is so we can all help each other survive and thrive literally 👏 👏

but no thank you for your directly-counter-to-the-evidence strawman, i appreciate you taking the time out of your day. i know you have a busy schedule of polishing your manager’s boots with your tongue and going “thank you daddy” as the capitalist class jerks off on your face. which, to be clear, would be fine if it were just a sex thing. but for you it’s the opposite of a sex thing. it’s Protestantism

[soppingwetratboy]

I’m 1976 anne rice decided to use a guy as a storytelling device and now people do crazy things to his cervix on tumblr dot com

[vanagore]

Absolutely baffling to me that people don’t like Orin. All this talk about “unhinged and unlikable female characters” and “feminine rage” and y’all can’t even handle her?? I’m lost

[danmeichael]

What's the kink for watching someone get cucked because I think I feel some sick sort of pleasure when I see SQQ's male harem getting cucked

i think the name of this kink is "person who reads ntr hentai"