#crybaby does a thing

[qoldenskies]

i think its so funny when people take the way donnie acts at face value even though its a horrible lie because he's a horrible liar, while understanding leo is bullshitting very well despite him actually being GOOD at bullshitting. many such cases

[myokk]

It's a clear, beautiful summer's day, the type of day that starts out bright and full of birdsong, that ends looking up at the stars and the moon while crickets chirp and fireflies show soft bursts of light. When the air is warm and full of life and the smell of hot grass and lavender and honey permeates everything.

The whole summer had been like that, really. Running outside with abandon, chasing each other through the tall grass deliriously happy and lying down in the fields surrounding their village, watching the clouds float by while they eat cucumber sandwiches. It's the summer before their first year at Hogwarts; the Sallow twins know that their life's about to change and are determined to enjoy their last summer of childhood.

Maybe they're too old for this sort of thing - they are eleven, after all, but both of them know that this summer is a turning point for them and they want to cherish every moment for as long as possible. Their parents have been encouraging them, often sending them out for the whole day, piling journals and ink and quills and picnic baskets full of food in their hands, encouraging them to research and be curious about the world around them as they had always done.

This day, however, their parents are almost eager to push the twins out of the house. Their mum's smile doesn't quite reach her eyes. Sebastian feels nervous about this, but doesn't realize why until much later, when the memory is analyzed and remembered during his dreams. (definitely not while awake). When they leave the house in the morning, she makes sure to kiss each of them on the cheeks which she normally never does and Sebastian pushes her away in disgust, much to his future horror. In the moment, all he can think is that he might still be holding on to the last moments of his childhood, but he's too old to be kissed by his mum.

(but now, Sebastian doesn't know if his memory is faulty and he is adding moments that never actually existed in the first place. the mind is a tricky place)

He never allows himself to think about these halcyon days, the perfect-until-it-wasn't summer before they went to Hogwarts; this day in particular is forbidden to remember. His unconscious mind rebels against his iron will.

They spend the morning looking for the fairies that Anne had dreamed about the night before. She's convinced that it's a prophetic dream and they march around in circles in the little copse of trees - a forest to the two children, who haven't really ventured out of their village - as Anne tries to remember where she had seen the fairies in her dream.

Sebastian is happy to follow her even if (maybe especially if) he thinks it's a futile adventure - what else are summer days for?

They're in that strange junction between childhood and adolescence; desperate to just grow up already and become the people they were always meant to be, and yet just wanting to spend their days being kids, without a care in the world.

"Come on, Sebastian," Anne calls to him, a tiny stream gurgling between them. In one hand, she's holding the map that she drew as soon as she woke up; in the other, boots stuffed with her stockings.

Sebastian huffs as he trudges behind her, arms full with their bags, his shoes, and the picnic basket. Anne had offered to help him carry things, but he refused on principle. Their dad is always doing small things like this for the women in his life, and Sebastian wants to be just like him.

Anyways, Anne has her own role as the leader today, and it won't do to have her bogged down.

And he's eleven, more than old enough to carry everything.

He steps through the tiny creek, mud and slush squishing through his toes, and he smiles. There isn't anything he loves more than being outside, except maybe being outside with a good book.

"Keep your eyes peeled for a tree with a knobby trunk, with lots of knots that look like faces," Anne tells him, glancing over her shoulder, then turns her face back to her map and scrunches up her face. "In my dream, the fairies lived nearby."

They spend the rest of the morning continuing their fruitless search, laughing as they walk in circles, then set up their picnic in the field next to their house.

"What do you think Hogwarts will be like?" Anne asks, a dreamy look on her face.

Sebastian doesn't look at her when he answers. He lies back and stares at the clouds. They've already had this conversation hundreds of times since their Hogwarts letters arrived, both of them have their parts memorized. "Amazing. I can't wait to actually be able to use our magic instead of just reading about it."

Anne rolls to her side and props herself up on her elbow, getting a better look at her brother's face. With a smirk, she says, "I think I'll like Transfiguration the best. I can't wait to be able to turn you into a -"

A huge noise interrupts her before she can continue. Sebastian sees the confusion in her face before he truly registers that something has happened. It's like everything's moving in slow motion and all he remembers clearly whenever he dreams of this day are his feelings of confusion and disbelief and the smell of fire.

There's a huge explosion and the air is full of smoke and he and Anne are scrambling up, the picnic blanket tangled up around their bare feet and -

Hand in hand they run in the direction of the huge black smoke that is billowing up. It coats the air - they can't see anything and the smell of burning fills their noses and the smoke fills their lungs and they're coughing coughing coughing -

Sebastian doesn't want his sister anywhere near the blackened husk of their former house but he is also terribly afraid to be alone. They stand in the middle of what used to be their house, blackened half-walls, charred wood that used to be their table, the old couch they read on every night, it's all smoldering, all gone, the thick black smoke making his eyes water and choking and smothering everything in its wake. His mind can't comprehend what he's seeing. Everything is so familiar and yet so wrong.

He doesn't know how long he and Anne stand there, clutching each others' hands like they are a tether to reality. Which, he supposes, they are. They might be there thirty seconds, ten minutes, one hour, an eternity...

Then, neighbors are running to the twins, coughing, covering their faces in the crooks of their elbows as they conjure blankets with their wands and wrap Sebastian and Anne up and drag them out of what is - was - their home.

This part is always hazy. Sebastian can't remember if he cries. Or if he even says anything. He just stands there with Anne, the smoke thick and oppressive as it pours out of their house. Everything is crumbling apart.

(A hand gently caresses his scalp, fingers light and reassuring as they dance through his hair)

Their neighbors try their hardest to salvage what they can. The daguerrotype that their mother had cherished more than anything, taken a few years before, miraculously survives. Sebastian stares at it, the tiny figures moving and laughing and smiling as though everything is perfect. He wants to throw it and break it or maybe rip it up to shreds but he can't bring himself to do anything but stare.

Their father's wand is also shoved into Sebastian's hand, unscathed. It was found just outside of his father's curled fingers, lying pristine on the ground as if mocking the destruction that it caused.

At some point, their Uncle Solomon, who they've only really seen once a year growing up, shows up with a loud crack and tears through the rubble, tears carving wet tracks through the soot on his face. His voice goes rough with desperation and when he walks up to the two orphans, he is almost unrecognizable.

As if in slow motion - maybe an after-effect of the curse that has destroyed their lives is that the air has turned into molasses - Sebastian watches his uncle stagger over to them. He looks much older than Sebastian remembers.

Later, when Sebastian looks at his reflection in the mirror of his new home, the boy staring back at him also looks much older than he remembers.

Before It Felt Like A Sin, Chapter 14

[antikittysocial]

yeah uh idk

[musubiki]

lime offhandedly making a comment to coco that mochi is such a crybaby (affectionate), and coco says "The hell are you talking about? I've never seen her cry once since I've known her." and lime realizes for the first time that maybe hes the only one that she actually shows that side of her

[anonymousbutgay]

[sunsetsover]

just saw the 'it's jungkooks first life' edit followed by a tweet comparing firstkhao to jikook and fell to my knees in my kitchen

[flovoid]

when an alcoholic single dad with a messed up past have three kids that are named after alcohol beverages…

[catboyfurina]

focalette / neuvalors whatever the ship name is orz

[malhare-archive]

I really loathe how empathy and sensitivity are so often viewed as naivety and weakness. I went through that whole nihilistic apathetic bullshit and let me tell you, trying to remain kind and tenderhearted is a lot stronger and braver

[c0rpseductor]

i dont want to like qrt this moron or anything and im really mostly posting this to banish them from my mind so i can play sims instead of be mad, but like

idk where ppl get off on being like "uhh its dumb how we use childhood trauma to mean stuff like [insert dismissive example of emotional abuse here] AND [insert very severe sexual abuse here]" or any other similar like, "ummm you must have had This much of an objectively bad experience to ride" nonsense

it's a failure to understand what trauma actually is (essentially one's mental/emotional damage related to the event in question) AND a failure to understand how much more vulnerable children are than adults (yes, insulting a child in a way that won't bother an adult is going to hurt the child, jesus christ, they're children), and it's also like.

how does that help people with "severe" traumatic experiences as you, apparent god-king of suffering, define them? i don't think it helps me, as somebody who was severely abused growing up. certainly you don't see people making these kinds of comparisons ever doing anything useful for survivors of severe abuse beyond, like, putting down other traumatized people by way of using us as a cudgel, because they don't care about ANY of us, they just want a socially acceptable excuse to call some people pussies.

i get that like, sometimes that is the knee-jerk response. it also does not absolve you of the responsibility to shut up and remember that everybody is different. like, so what if someone else is less resilient to cruelty? they shouldn't have to be treated cruelly in the first place. be fucking nice. common decency is not a limited resource that must be budgeted for only the most put-upon

[selamat-linting]

i love it when im obsessed over a guy so much that my mutuals get to know him too. saw my mutual in the dash explaining to their mutual in law about who cm punk is and im just <3333 my powerr ✨✨✨ i bet they sighed and go "oh. this guy" yes he is!!!

[derelictheretic]

Which Tragic Greek Figure Are You?

I was tagged by @aceghosts and @strangefable (and others at some point I can't remember ahsjsjd) to do this uquiz for my monsters <3 Thank you!!

Tagging @shellibisshe @bluemojave @deputyash @eur0paa-2 @ishwaris @jollybone @bl-beater @trashcatsnark @viktor-sinclaire @wewillryesagain and anyone else who wants too!! <3

Achilles

best of the greeks, eager for honor, and quick to rage: you could easily live content and easy until you're gray-haired, but glory and fame call for you just beyond the horizon. you are not prone to self-reflection and trip into the same pits of wrath at bruised pride over and over. are you truly ready to sacrifice everything so that your name will be immortalized? is your fury what you want to be remembered for?

Odysseus

you are that which men dream to be: strong, courageous, and noble, with more intelligence than you know what to do with. and, like all men, you do not account for your overabundance of pride. you long for your name to be wrapped in glory and honor, and your journey home is only made longer by your search for fights to win and monsters to trick.

Antigone

(there was no text for this one so I did some research and wrote my own lmao)

envious and gluttonous for recognition and gratification, you are stubborn and loyal to a fatal fault. You crave the fulfillment of your own desires to the point you are blind to all reason, you will seek to sate yourself even if it brings upon your own and others death. In life you will be known for your secrecy and desperation, in death your pride and loneliness.

Cyparissus

young cyparissus, innocent cyparissus, it was all only an accident. your stag, finding relief from the relentless summer sun of Apollo under the forest's trees, did not deserve the cruel wound of your javelin stuck within him, and you did not deserve to inadvertently be the cause of his death. but grief does not care about intent and accidents, does it? even now, your cypress trees cry your mourning tears.

[hauntingblue]

I think this flashback episode is very cruel to show us luffy as a child suffering because of the same thing current luffy is going thru. Enough

[salsflore]

[katyspersonal]

Had kinda anxiety-inducing dreams tonight. A lot of themes of misfitting and caution. You know those dreams about meeting people you only know online in reality? Had one of those, but it was focusing on trying to befriend a person I don't even know much and only briefly interacted with for two times at most, before we became enemies against my will (and from what I could conclude he really hates me, to the point it'd effect how he feels towards other people).

Internet is just so fucking RICH for parasocial connections to exist. You can never really talk with someone but they'd still bother your mind sometimes, simply because it is impossible to 100% avoid something online. The dream was just too fucking unnerving. I knew who that person was, but he didn't know it was me, so I just kept asking questions about his interests or ideas, or being mindful if some help was needed (there was some sort of important activity going on that I wasn't a part of), but still kept the distance from fear. The dream also ended in a really strange way; a large centipede appeared from somewhere, but it had human intelligence and language. It judged me for not honestly confessing who I was despite knowing that person loathed me and saw me as a monster, maybe even wished me harm, and when I tried to object, it just said "You can go now" in that sorta.. dismissive manner, and I woke up. Like if it disconnected me from the dream.

I really don't know what the FUCK that dream meant, other than some sort of psychological twist on how I must be secretly hurting over not being able to be acquaintances under the waking mind layer of hostility. Makes me wonder how many of the people I hate I not actually hate, but just convince myself to hate out of fear. It is creepy sometimes, what internet can do to people. I think everyone I am close with had weird dreams about people they only saw in the internet at least a few times, so maybe it is more normal than I think. It is just.... this is strange.

A centipede is also a weird choice for manifestation of anxiety, fear and disgust with myself because I love centipedes, but it is what it is.... and, well, I've found strange kinship with Laurence recently anyways, heh. I want to say I wonder what the fuck happened to me to make me be so prideful and insufferable about my flaws but then think that a "positive" feeling such as wanting to maybe fucking NOT be enemies makes me a terrible person, but I know what, don't I. It is just a lot of mocking from normies, for years. That just tends to internalize, whether you want it or not. You just end up inflicting their insults and accusations on yourself even when no one is there.

[tittyinfinity]

Depression/PTSD recovery is wild because you could be doing greater than you've ever been in your life but then one small thing happens that reminds you of "that time" and suddenly all of the past emotions flood back into you and you feel like you're back to being the kid who's crying and shaking in the corner wondering if the people closest to you would be so much happier without you