#but ever since then she doesnt/tries not to cry in front of anyone else

[musubiki]

lime offhandedly making a comment to coco that mochi is such a crybaby (affectionate), and coco says "The hell are you talking about? I've never seen her cry once since I've known her." and lime realizes for the first time that maybe hes the only one that she actually shows that side of her

[thepictureofsdr]

friendly reminders

- alastair was on his way to self love, was finally in a good place, dyed his hair back, cut off charles, and tried to apologize, only to have it all come crumbling down and ran out of the room in tears

- alastair is so secure in the idea that he is truly despised that he assumed the thieves would laugh about elias’s alcoholism

- alastair had to deal with his fathers death and getting involved in a murder investigation only to get out and be manipulated into seeing charles

- alastair is now dealing with the death of his father, his pregnant mother, and the reputation of the family all alone because the one person he thought he could rely on ran off to paris leaving him alone once again

- alastair denied himself a relationship he desperately wanted partially because he believes he’s unlovable and partially to protect the person he adores

- alastair thought charles was a good partner beause alastair has never witnessed or experienced true unconditional selfless love

- pretty much everyone knew about elias’s alcoholism and did absolutley nothing, the thieves still continued to harass alastair 

- alastair has been was threatened with being thrown into the thames, told he deserves cruel treatment, and it was insinuated that alastair makes his sister uncomfortable, all in front of her during HER WEDDING (and she did practically nothing)

- according to cordelia elias “had broken his son’s heart in a dozen different ways”

- alastair is probably so well spoken because he had to take over official house correspondences while elias was too drunk

- alastair never had a childhood

- alastair has never had a true friend

- alastair is the only character to have been fully alone almost his entire life

- alastair is despied for things he did years ago as a child that he didnt even want to do in the first place

- he still blames himself and carries the guilt 

- hes been punishing himself since he was a child

- he still hates and punishes himself 

- alastair has been enduring abuse and trauma from the age of 10 and has been alone the entire time

- alastair does things for people all the time and all anyone does in return is take 

- people insult alastair even when hes not there

-alastair doesnt believe he can be loved

- im putting all of these in one place 

- thomas said he was thinking of how alastair must be feeling after the death of his father and alastair began to cry because he is just that unfamiliar with the concept of people caring about his feelings and he so fully believes that because of his past actions, (which he never even wanted to do in the first place) he does not deserve love

- thomas’s closest friend group created an environment where he could never them about the person he’s increasingly liked and loved since his first year of school, where he’s had to put everyone before himself for years, where he’s had to keep the affections he has for the only person hes ever loved a secret his the whole time

- alastair sees a travel year as a vacation when everyone else considers it work because his entire life has been such a draining job that working away from his normal life and the demands forced on him every day makes him feel like he’s on vacation and not on an official job posting

- alastairs friend group for 90% of his stay at the academy were the boys who had spent a year bullying and beating him into a person he despises

- alastair himself has said he has absolutely no friends and that sona wouldnt even question why he would be with christopher because she would be so delighted at the idea of him having a single friend

- alastair intended to protect cordelia from elias’s alcoholism forever, and never intended to tell anyone he was trailing thomas. he gives so much of himself to the people he loves in secret without ever expecting anything in return, we will never know just how much he has done for others because he never tells anyone how much he sacrifices, because everything comes from the unimaginable amount of love in his heart with expectation of nothing, kindness just for the sake of kindness

- matthew still partially blames alastair for what happened to the baby, and this will 100% eventually be revealed, most likely revealed to alastair with a cruel accusation of guilt, and alastair won't think and say "you cannot blame me for your actions," he will completely blame himself on top of everything else he blames himself for and all we can do is hope this amount of guilt won't send all his progress and sanity crashing down

- the only person alastair can somewhat rely on, his sister, has literally said the words "I suppose you think I am terrible, still loving him" about him

theres so much more but honestly im too sad for this

[plan-d-to-i]

(google translate again, yeah)

(I forgot to thank you for the last answer, I really didn't know that the drama used the music of my compatriot, it was a pleasant surprise for me)

I don't know if anyone has asked you this before, but do you think JC was good with WWX as a kid?

I mean not just their childhood, but the time of their training in Gusu.

I really love JC, and I understand perfectly well that he is the most dick in character, but I love him precisely during my studies at Gusu, I can not give any arguments that then JC was directly GOOD to WWX, but he is clearly cared a little about him and even ... worried? at least that moment after the punishment where JC helped WWX get to the room...

Yay - I'm so happy to hear about Stravinsky :)

Hahah loving jc as the dick that he is is the way to do it! go for it. :) also, sorry this was so delayed I wanted to reread the Cloud Recesses arc so it would be fresh in my mind before answering.

In terms of jc the Cloud Recesses arc is perhaps the most 'mellow' we see him aside from the Lotus Pod Extra but for me it's still impossible to find him a worthwhile person. I can already see the faults in his character that I know will only get worse as he grows older. Canonically I don't see how he would have any friends studying in the Cloud Recesses if he didn't come as a package deal w Wei Wuxian. I mean I doubt jiang cheng would have any friends without WWX period. In fact jiang cheng doesn't make any friends over the course of 13 years. He's also unable to find a wife bc of his temperament and behavior...

What we can glean about their relationship in the Cloud Recesses arc (and even the Lotus Pod Extra) is that any time WWX gets a kind word or understanding from someone, jiang cheng scoffs at it. Any time someone shits on WWX, jc is there to agree, to relish the idea of WWX being punished, and shit on him some more. He would be an immensely exhausting person to be around. He doesnt believe in WWX's ideas and ingenuity, (as NHS does for example), he doesn't believe WWX is hurt, he always assumes the worst of him, he doesn't believe LWJ might like WWX. The only thing he ever seems to believe is that WWX will dishonor YunmengJiang and that WWX should be punished. So for a kid who supposedly wants his father's approval so badly he instead constantly acts like his mother's mouthpiece/minion. He reprimands WWX like he's trying to become Madam Yu 2.0. I see jc stans all the time being like oh he had to keep WWX in check bc WWX was such a lOOooose canon, for the good of the Clan!! lol listen JFM didn't give a f...about WWX's behavior (in his letter to LQR) why are you so concerned? JFM would have preferred for jc to try & save his peers in the Xuanwu cave or at least to understand why that was the correct course of action rather than for him to just sit in front of the class in the Cloud Recesses and tell WWX off for giving LQR as good as he got, while actually still breaking the rules himself but eschewing punishment.

salt up here, quotes below :

Even when Nie Huaisang picks up on the fact that WWX is being treated unfairly by LQR, jc dismisses it and piles on WWX instead.

Nie Huaisang said, “Old Man Lan really seems like he’s coming down especially harshly on you. Every time he reprimands someone, it’s always you.” Jiang Cheng grunted. “He deserves it. What kind of answer was that? He can get away with saying that sort of nonsense at home, but he had the nerve to say it to Lan Qiren’s face. He was practically asking for the old man to kill him!”

But does WWX get away with ANYTHING in Lotus Pier? When we know he is punished constantly for EVERYTHING? This is jiang cheng fully being his mother's mouth piece. It's not something WWX would get away with, it's something jc knows JFM wouldn't mind. Which is why he's so pissed off. Which begs the question if JFM would not be upset with WWX's behavior why does jc need to criticize him? Again :

A dark expression shadowed Jiang Cheng’s face, and his voice was filled with anger. “Why are you so proud of yourself? What is there to be proud of?! Is being told to get out some amazing accomplishment? You’re making our entire clan lose face!”

and his glee at the idea that WWX will be punished leaves a bad taste in one's mouth considering how WWX was perpetually punished in Lotus Pier by jiang cheng's mother for... existing.

Jiang Cheng smiled grimly. “Now that you’ve thoroughly offended both Lan Wangji and Lan Qiren, you’re basically dead tomorrow. No one’s going to clean up your corpse either.”

and again

Without the old one, only the young one remained. This would be easy to deal with! Wei Wuxian rolled off the bed and laughed while putting on his boots. “Heaven’s charmed clouds are blessing me with shade.” Jiang Cheng was beside him polishing his sword with loving care when he decided to spill cold water over Wei Wuxian’s head. “Just wait until he gets back. You can’t escape punishment.”

Where others like NHS see value in WWX's thoughts

Nie Huaisang thought for a while. “Actually, I thought what you said was very interesting,” he said, not entirely able to hide his envy and yearning.

jc is always dismissive of WWX's ideas. These are inventions that WWX realizes. Demonic cultivation in the first conversation and The Spirit-Attraction Flag and The Compass of Evil in the second:

“Enough,” Jiang Cheng warned. “Whatever nonsense you spout, you better not head down that sort of dark road.”

-

Changing the topic, Wei Wuxian said, “If only there was something like fishing bait that could draw the water ghosts in. Or, something that could point in the direction they’re hiding, like a compass, that sort of thing.”

“Lower your head and watch the water,” Jiang Cheng said. “You’re letting your fantasies run wild again. Concentrate on looking for water ghosts like you’re supposed to.”

“Hey, mounting swords and flying was also only a fantasy once!” Wei Wuxian said.

He's also a hypocrite. Because even though he berates WWX for misbehaving, he himself breaks the rules. He drinks, he even goads WWX into buying liquor, the only difference is that he doesn't get punished for it, and he doesn't feel like coming forward and getting punished for it :

Naturally, Jiang Cheng was too embarrassed to talk about what Wei Wuxian had been up to. After all, all of them had egged him on to go and buy alcohol, and they all deserved to be punished as well. He could only speak vaguely. “It’s nothing. It’s nothing. It’s not that bad! He can walk. Wei Wuxian, why haven’t you gotten off yet?”

It's no wonder WWX is so impressed by LWJ's integrity in spite of his social status, when he's clearly used to the other dynamic :

“Lan Zhan, I really admire you,” Wei Wuxian said sincerely. “After I told you that you had to punish yourself too, you actually did it. You didn’t let yourself off at all. I can’t argue against that.”

A dynamic which is shown repeating in the Lotus Pod Extra where WWX is the only one to get punished for sunbathing, and which repeats here when Wei Wuxian here stops jiang cheng from confronting Zixuan over YanLi's honor (and jc's) and does it himself.

Zixuan :“Why don’t you ask what about her could make me satisfied?” he said in return.

Suddenly, Jiang Cheng rose. Wei Wuxian pushed him away and stepped between them, smiling coldly. “You think you’re very satisfactory? As though you have the right to be so picky!”

Zixuan: “If she’s unhappy, then let her break off the engagement! I certainly don’t cherish your wonderful disciple-sister. If you cherish her so much, why don’t you take it up with your father? Doesn’t he love you more than his own son?”

After hearing the last sentence, Jiang Cheng’s eyes narrowed, and Wei Wuxian was no longer able to contain his own fury. He flew at Jin Zixuan, his fist raised.

WWX takes the punishment alone. Same way he offers to do when he hurts himself falling from a tree because jc threatened him with dogs. meanwhile jc is gleeful to see him being punished.

[Wei Wuxian] was kneeling on the stretch of pebble road to which Lan Qiren had assigned him when Jiang Cheng walked over from afar and mocked him. “You’re kneeling so obediently.”

“It’s not like you don’t know I have to do this all the time.” Wei Wuxian’s voice filled with schadenfreude. “But this Jin Zixuan guy, there’s no way he hasn’t been pampered and spoiled rotten since birth. No one’s ever forced him to kneel, I’m sure of it. If he doesn’t wind up crying for mommy and daddy today, I’m not named Wei.”....

Wei Wuxian "...It’s a good thing you didn’t do anything.”

“I was going to. If you hadn’t pushed me away, the other side of Jin Zixuan’s face would be hideous too.”

“Stop it. His face is uglier for being lopsided."

WWX is happy to have spared jc from getting into trouble but jc makes the whole thing about himself anyway (like everything else ever) and is upset JFM would rush over for WWX - in his mind. Even though JFM clearly had to rush over to meet with Jin Guangshan not to coddle WWX in any way.

"Jiang Fengmian had never rushed to another clan in less than a day because of him. Regardless of whether what happened was big or small, or good or bad." Never

WWX on the other hand tries to be observant of jc's feelings and reassure him & distract him from his moods :

When Wei Wuxian saw Jiang Cheng’s melancholy expression, he thought he was still upset with what Jin Zixuan said. “You should leave. You don’t need to keep me company any longer. If Lan Wangji comes again, he’ll catch you. If you have time, you should find Jin Zixuan and watch his pitiful kneeling.”

Later in the book after nearly dying in the Xuanwu cave WWX leaves his sick bed to run after jc and comfort him after his mother's rant, even though WWX had to listen to his parents (and himself) being slandered by YZY. jc doesn't spare any thoughts for how other people might be feeling or suffering. His entire perception of the world is centered around himself. To him even WWX's greatest fear doesn't generate empathy, only amusement or later on a form of torture.

From that point onward, they made trouble everywhere together, and if they encountered a dog, Jiang Cheng would always chase it away for him, then enjoy a peal of derisive, unbridled laughter at Wei Wuxian’s expense beneath whichever tree the boy had leapt atop.

he grew up on the streets, often having to fight for food with vicious dogs. After several bites and chases, he gradually became extremely scared of all dogs, no matter the size. Jiang Cheng laughed at him because of this quite a lot of times.

This brings me to the last point. jc's resentment of WWX's interest in Lan Zhan, or in a serious friendship outside of him. I see so many ppl say that bc WWX fought he was kicked out of the Cloud Recesses early... but was he?

Jiang Cheng was somewhat taken aback. “Lan Wangji? What was he doing here? He still has the nerve to come see you again?”

“Yeah, I think his bravery is laudable if he still has the nerve to come see me. His uncle probably told him to check on me and see if I was kneeling properly.”

Jiang Cheng’s instincts were sending him ominous signals. “So were you kneeling properly?”

“I was then,” Wei Wuxian replied. “But I waited for him to walk away a bit, then took a tree branch, lowered my head, and dug out a hole in the dirt near me. It’s the pile right by your foot—there are ant tunnels there. It took me so much effort to find them. Anyway, I waited for him to turn back and see my shoulders shaking. He had to have thought I was crying, so he came back and asked. You should have seen his face when he caught sight of the ant tunnels!

“…” Jiang Cheng said, “Why don’t you just get the hell out and go back to Yunmeng? I bet he never wants to see you again.”

Thus, that evening, Wei Wuxian packed up his things, got the hell out, and went back to Yunmeng with Jiang Fengmian.

Repeatedly throught his stay in the Cloud Recesses even while NHS was observing that LWJ's behavior around WWX was strange and unique, jc was telling WWX he is hated and bothersome. When WWX wanted to apologize to LWJ jc is completely dismissive of it :

“He hates me already? I was thinking of apologizing to him,” Wei Wuxian said.

“Oh, so you want to apologize now? It’s too late!” Jiang Cheng said derisively. “He’s exactly like his uncle. He thinks you’ve been wicked ever since you were an embryo, so it’s beneath his dignity to pay you any attention.”

Later on when WWX mentioned wanting to invite LWJ to Lotus Pier jc categorically says no.

“Jiang Cheng had on a stern expression, “Let’s make this clear. I don’t want him to come, anyhow. Don’t invite him.”

BONUS

jc also always doubts WWX. He suspects him immediately of wrongdoings. He doesn't believe that getting hit with the discipline ruler in Cloud Recesses actually hurt him until LXC confirms that WWX might take more than a few days to heal. He doesn't understand WWX is in actual trouble from the Waterborne abyss and assumes he's fooling around luckily Lan Zhan is there to rescue him:

The disciple’s lower body had already been swallowed by the black whirlpool. It spun faster and faster, and he continued to sink deeper and deeper, as though something hidden beneath the water was pulling down on his legs.

Mounted on Sandu, Jiang Cheng had risen calmly until he was about sixty meters above the whirlpool before he looked down. Filled with displeasure at what he saw, he shouted and dove down. “What are you up to now?!”

The suction force inside Lake Biling grew ever stronger. Wei Wuxian’s sword was optimized for agility, and consequently, its strength happened to fall just short, and they were nearly pulled to the surface of the lake. Wei Wuxian steadied himself and held on to Su She with both hands.

“Someone help! If I can’t pull him up soon, I’ll have to let go!” he shouted.

Suddenly, the back of Wei Wuxian’s collar tightened, and his body was lifted into the air. He twisted his neck and saw Lan Wangji holding him up with one hand.

He maintains this same mindset when he tries to whip LWJ and WWX as they're attempting to leave Lotus Pier after the ancestral hall confrontation when WWX passes out.

Is jc evil in the Cloud Recesses ? No. He's just an annoying, basic, disagreeable asshole who doesn't bring anything positive to someone like WWX. People like jc become obsessed with kind, outgoing, generous people, people who don't set boundaries on what they give and what others take in their friendships. Even though they're dependent on them for their social interactions, because who else would socialize with them willingly, they resent them in equal measure, but at the same time they wouldn't be drawn to another selfish, self centered piece of shit person like themselves.

On a personal note, even Cloud Recesses jiang cheng is someone I would exclude from any personal friend group. Friendship with him is adding a minefield of jealousies and snide comments to every interaction. Things that then others will need to compensate around because he won't compromise or empathize w issues outside of his own concerns.

Translation source : x

[mistymorningdewdr0p]

The Little Things You Keep Hidden From Me

~~~(this is a long one so bear with me! using she/they pronouns for namaari btw!)~~~

namaari likes things—she really really does! she just, well, never really knows where to put their stuff, just shoving it into a basket to get it out of sight...they had never really thought of it as a problem, just something that was obvious since she was so busy with all of her royal duties, but the longer she’s around raya the more they realize something might be up.

when raya and her start dating, they naturally begin to spend more time at each other’s homes, more specifically in each other’s rooms. the third time raya spends the night in fang since they’ve become official, she finally asks namaari just why her room is so incredibly bare, claiming it looks more like a spare room in a random inn rather than a living space. namaari is actually stumped by this question, answering that “she’s just too busy to put any posters up or little figurines out.” raya doesnt believe it though, she can tell there’s something else by the quirk in namaari’s brow that the fang princess does often without even realizing. nevertheless, raya let’s it go and cuddles deeper into her girlfriends neck, taking a mental note to bring it up when they’re both more awake.

the next time raya brings it up, however, is when the girls are sparring together to blow off some steam. namaari had already been slightly agitated from an argument with her mother so it probably wasn’t the best for raya to bring up right then. despite that, the princess of heart had tried to play it off in a joking manner, snickering a bit as she told the other princess that they should travel to talon sometime to pick up decorations so namaari can stop having such a “bare ass room”. the kick to the gut raya received immediately notified her that it was definitely a bad time, especially as she moaned on the ground in pain as namaari stormed off. despite it only taking them two days to reconcile after that, raya promised she wouldn’t bring it up again, even though namaari still hadn’t told her why the question bothered them so bad.

even though raya had said she wouldn’t bring up the issue again, she began to rethink after a short talk with sisu about the matter. the dragon had brought up a very good point: “why not just add things here and there and see how namaari reacts? that way nothing is permanent and namaari wouldn’t have to try and put her feelings into words, just remove what they didn’t want.”raya didn’t have the best feeling about this but she sensed that this issue was more than it seemed and that it needed to be explored so she took sisu up on her offer and put the plan into effect on her following trips to fang. she’d place a poster by namaari’s bed or a small dragon carved of trees from spine on the desk one day and place a plant or a book by the door the next. the first two items disappeared within the hour of them being up and the second two held out for a day. raya tried this again two more times and the same pattern followed. she was now missing a poster, the wood carving, the book, a throw pillow, a small teddy bear, and a plant—this only concerned her more as namaari hadn’t brought any of it up. just as raya was starting to give up on this experiment, a breakthrough moment happened.

it had been a exhaustingly long day of meetings and diplomatic hearings and all the two princesses wanted to do was sleep. they hung out on namaari’s bed, cuddling as they chatted with sisu who was perched on the windowsill before namaari decided she was going to shower. sisu said goodbye and raya started gathering her own belongings from her bag for bed. normally she’d join her girlfriend in the shower but they were both feeling much too sluggish for that kind of shower at the moment.

as raya was taking off her jewelry, one of her arm bands rolled off the edge of the bed and under the closet door on the other side of the room. she sighed in exasperation but got up to retrieve it nonetheless. when she opened the closet door and reached in to grab her jewelry, she was surprised to see a large basket placed in the middle of the chamber among her girlfriend’s clothes. she knew she should probably ask namaari if it was ok to open it but something in her gut was screaming at her to peak inside, so she looked behind her to make sure no one had entered the room without her knowing and moved to open the basket, face contorting in confusion when she saw what was in it.

in front of her sat all of the objects that she had placed in the room, all situated in such a way so that nothing was broken or squashed. raya also noticed some other objects like books and pages of artwork hidden under the materials she had lost. it took her only a moment to sigh sadly and put the lid back onto the basket. she made her way back to the bed and sat on it, head in her hands as she waited for namaari to return.

“i can’t believe how much dirt can stick to you when you sweat, it’s absolutely disgust-“ namaari said as she walked back into the room, now in her night clothes.

“raya? what’s wrong, why do you look so sad?” The fang princess said, closing the door behind them with a worried expression.

raya was silent for a moment before exhaling and standing up from the bed, walking over to her girlfriend and taking both of their hands in her own.

“when i was getting my stuff together for my shower, one of my arm bands fell off the bed and rolled under the closet door. i saw the basket, maari.” raya said, looking down at their conjoined hands.

“you didn’t open it, did you?” namaari said, voice clearly wavering as her eyebrows creased together.

“you know i had to. it didn’t feel right...” raya replied sadly.

“well it doesn’t mean anything, it’s just a stupid basket.” namaari huffed, pulling her hands away from raya and walking away from her and towards the window, back to their girlfriend.

“that’s not true namaari. you and i both know what that basket is for.” raya could tell namaari was getting upset, their shoulders were tensing and her fists were squeezed into balls.

“i said it was nothing. drop it raya.” namaari warned, chest heaving as she started to get worked up.

“i will not drop it! why didn’t you tell me that you don’t keep any of your personal items out because you’re afraid you’ll have to flee fang one day and don’t want to risk leaving them behind?!” raya shouted, temper fully exploding.

to anyone else, that may seem like a ridiculous stretch, but raya knew better. she knew this is what namaari had done because she had done the same thing all her years of searching for sisu. since she had no time to gather her belongings the day the dragon gem broke, the only mementos from home she had left were the clothes and accessories on her body, tuktuk, and her father’s sword. for years as she traveled she never once took them out of her bag, in fear that she’d be ambushed and would have to outrun bandits or druun. she longed to be able to take out her clothes she was wearing that day and hold them close to her chest, focusing on how beautiful that morning had been with her father still in her life, but she was more terrified of losing them in the event she had to run for her life.

the basket was large but also made out of a very light material that was abundant in fang. the handles were designed to not pinch or strain the hands and the bottom was weaved in such a way that running with it would not be too much of a hinderance. raya immediately knew that this basket was bought for a specific purpose and the person who bought it hadn’t even realized how heartbreaking the situation was.

“so what?! i just want to be prepared, get off my case about it!” namaari shouted back, turning to face raya with a deep scowl on her face.

“namaari, being prepared is packing a bag with the essentials for survival! maybe even some extra clothes that mean a lot to you, this is not prepared! this is paranoid!” raya shouted, gesturing around the bare room with flailing arms.

“i am not fucking paranoid! who knows what could happen tomorrow?! who knows who i could lose at any moment in my life! just because i want to keep my things at the ready does not mean i am paranoid, it means i’m smart, don’t be jealous because you were too dumb to think of it!” namaari all but roared at their girlfriend.

they both froze for a moment, just looking at each other in a huff as they took in namaari’s words.

“i’m smart enough to know when someone is going through something and i’m smart enough to know that i need to step in to help. but yeah, guess i’m the fucking idiot for trying to check on you, my own girlfriend. my bad, though, i’ll try to be less dumb next time, yeah?” raya said, face stone cold as she grabbed her coat and left the room, leaving namaari with tears streaming down her face behind her.

~~~

namaari absolutely hates crying. not because they feel like they don’t have the right to do it, but because once she starts, she can rarely ever stop. she bottles up so much and when that bottle explodes every negative emotion she’s had just comes gushing out. they cried and cried, head feeling like it was going to split as she sobbed into her hands. they hadn’t meant to hurt raya’s feelings, they were just so incredibly ashamed their fears had gotten to them so badly. it took her an hour for the tears to stop falling from her eyes and one hour after that to fully compose herself enough to stand up from where she had sunk to the ground. they walked over on shaky legs to their closet and opened it, pulling out the basket and dumping the contents out onto the bed. she looked over the objects, finally understanding it had been raya who had placed them all in her room out of care and not her mother to spite her, the thought only making her want to cry again. she shoved it down and kept looking, eyes finally landing on the bear plushy that had rolled farther down her bed. she picked it up and sighed, holding it close to her chest as she bit back more tears.

“i hate it when you two fight.” sisu said solemly from the windowsill, voice soft but still startling namaari on accident.

“you and me both.” namaari responded, voice weak from their sobbing.

“she’s ready for you, you know.” the dragon said, making her way into the room to stand beside the fang princess.

“i know. it just, continues to shock me just how much she trusts i’ll always come back to her. i don’t think anyone but my mother has fought for me that hard.” namaari said, toying with the plush in her hands.

“i don’t think she’s ever wanted to fight for anyone as much as she fights for you, other than her father.” sisu replied, placing a hand on the human’s shoulder.

“i really messed up, sisu. i feel awful.” namaari said, leaning into the touch.

“nows your chance to make it right then, come on, she’s waiting.” sisu said, waiting for the princess’ consent before grabbing her by the waist and flying them out the window.

~~~

raya absolutely hated being angry. the feeling burned like thousands of fire ants under her skin that were crawling through her nerves and stinging at her body to get out. she just wanted to help namaari! that’s all. she had been exactly where the fang princesses had and it was eating her alive that she felt like namaari wasn’t trusting her.

after leaving namaari’s room she had managed to make it to the water front uninterrupted in an angry haze before sisu stopped her.

“woah, woah, woah, hold it right there, grumpy!” sisu said, stopping right in front of the heart princess.

“what’s with the frown?! did namaari kick you out again because you snore?” sisu said, completely oblivious to the fact raya was deeply upset by this.

“no sisu and i don’t want to fucking talk about it right now, move.” raya said harshly, pushing passed the dragon and continuing her stomping.

sisu was back in front of her in seconds, face now contorted in a scowl as she towered over the princess from heart. they had talked about how much sisu hated when people cursed at her, even if it was all light hearted, and it seemed like raya had forgotten and needed to be reminded.

“don’t talk to me like that. it’s disrespectful, princess.” the dragon all but spat at the human.

rayas eyes went wide, weak inhale filling her lungs as she understood what the dragon was saying. after a moment of them staring at each other, raya sighed, hands pressing onto her eyes as she started to tear up.

“you’re right. i’m sorry. i just—god i’m just so angry!” raya said, tears falling freely from her eyes at this point as she sunk to the ground. they were at the water front now, sitting on the edge of where the boats would dock.

“what happened?” sisu asked, gently wrapping her arms around her friend.

“namaari and i got into a fight about all of the missing stuff. i don’t know why i hadn’t put two and two together but she was hiding it in a basket in her closet because they were afraid they’d have to run from fang.” raya said, leaning into the dragon’s touch.

“why would they still be afraid? the druun are gone now.” sisu asked, face pulled into a worried expression.

“i would’ve asked them but they got defensive when i told them about the basket and you know when she gets defensive she starts acting like a jerk.” raya said, wiping her tears as they fell.

“sounds like someone else i know...”sisu said, smile clearly present in her voice.

raya laughed softly, sisu’s comment cheering her up slightly. she sighed and pulled away from the dragon, pushing her hair out of her face.

“i don’t want her to be afraid that they’ll come back. we’ve only talked about them a little bit i know she also has nightmares about it and it keeps her awake when i’m not with her. i just didn’t expect them to be so fearful that they refuse to keep anything permanent up in their room because they don’t think they’ll be able to take their belongings with them in case they have to flee.” raya said, now looking down at her hands.

“i know you just want to help but getting over stuff like that isn’t always easy, especially when you think you’re moving forward and it seems like ten things push you back. i know i’m not the best at relationship advice but maybe try letting her talk at you rather than with you.” sisu said.

“like how?” raya asked.

“let her get everything out: the nightmares, the objects and what they mean to them, all that stuff. no arguing and little to no commentary. just free talk. through that you might understand the underlying cause of all of this paranoia. which i’m also guessing you made her feel bad for so you should apologize for that asap.” sisu replied.

“you’re right, i know you are, it’s just—hard. i’ve never felt like this before, so in love with someone who has their own stuff to work through too, and i don’t want to mess it up because she deserves happiness.” raya said, looking up from her hands and at the dragon by her side, who she was surprised to see was wearing an expression of absolute surprise at what she had said.

“what? why are you so surprised? was it something i said?” Raya began—in that very moment realizing it was something she said. she covered her mouth with both hands and matched sisu’s wide eyes.

“raya, you said the L word.” sisu whispered.

“oh my god i said the L word.” raya echoed.

“sisu—i...” raya tried to speak but the words were caught in her throat. she had really said it out loud that she was in love with namaari, like fully and deeply in love with her and it was so overwhelming she began to cry again.

“i’m so proud of you, girl! admitting your in love is a big step. i’m so happy for you.” sisu said, pulling raya into a hug that was beating the edge of way too tight for a human and not tight enough for raya.

“thank you, sisu, you’re an incredible friend.” raya smiled.

“yeah, i know. i rock!” sisu chuckled, pulling away and getting up from where she had been sitting.

“now, i’m going to go get that other grumpy princess and you two are going to talk some things out, ok?” sisu said.

“ok, tell her i’m ready for her.” raya said, smiling as sisu sprang into the sky and glided to the palace.

~~~

even though it would seem like namaari would be afraid of heights, it was actually quite the opposite. they loved being in high places and looking out at the world around them. soaring through the air with a dragon, let alone the sisudatu, was not something she ever thought she’d do in her life—now? they wouldn’t have it any other way.

“this is your stop, your majesty. oh! and be on your best behavior or i’ll drop you in the ocean when i come back.” Sisu said, placing namaari on the ground next to raya.

“and that goes for both of you! best. behavior.” sisu added before flying off and leaving them alone.

both princesses sat in silence for a moment, both not entirely sure where to start.

“look, maari, i’m—“ raya began.

“No!” namaari countered, effectively cutting Raya off.

“you always take the first step. i don’t want you to think that i won’t meet you there. if it’s ok, i’d like to go first.” namaari said, sitting down next to the heart princess.

“ok, go for it, i’m here to listen.” raya replied.

“i’m really sorry for how i reacted. I didnt mean to hurt your feelings or imply you’re not intelligent. I was so ashamed that i let my fears get the best of me that i started acting like a...” Namaari began.

“A jerk?” Raya asked, mouth slightly quirked up at the corner

“A bitch.” Namaari smiled softly.

“I should’ve listened to what you were trying to tell me. I was being paranoid when i should’ve just toughened up.” Namaari finished.

Raya sighed and took her girlfriend’s hand that wasn’t holding onto the little bear.

“Don’t say that. You are not a bad person for being paranoid and it’s not so easy to just “toughen up” when it comes to trauma. I’m so sorry I made you feel that way, i was so wrong for that, maari. And i’m also sorry for opening the basket without your permission.” Raya confessed, making good on her agreement with sisu to apologize for making Namaari feel less than because of her fear.

“thank you, that means a lot to me, raya. I just dont want to start thinking that the druun will never return only to be proven wrong if they do, it makes me feel stupid and like i should’ve known better than to expect better. the nightmares and the second guessing and the stress of being alone on a lot of open land with no water source...it’s all so hard to deal with sometimes. but i think i’m realizing the more i push it down the worse it gets.” Namaari confessed.

“as much as i wish i knew what i could do to make it hurt you less, I don’t think i’ll ever fully understand how you’re feeling, even if our situations used to be similar—so i’m gonna work really hard to prove to you that you can always come to me and get comfort, even if i don’t always know what it’s like. i guess i was just feeding my own fear that you didn’t trust me instead of realizing you were so afraid because you do trust me.” raya explained, squeezing her girlfriend’s hand tighter.

“i dont want to lose you, not like i did before.” namaari said, unshed tears making their eyes gloss over as they squeezed raya’s hand tightly.

they both knew they were talking about when raya turned to stone, since namaari was uncertain if putting the pieces back together was going to work at all—if they hadn’t that would mean raya would be gone forever.

“i promise you i’m not going anywhere. i love you far too much to not fight for you.” the heart princess said, placing her hand softly on namaari’s cheek to use her thumb and brush away a stray tear.

“please never stop loving me.” namaari pleaded, tears rolling down her cheeks now.

“i wouldnt dream of it, dep la.” raya said, pulling the fang princess in for a long overdue make up kiss. she firmly pressed her lips to namaari’s as she pulled the princess’s face towards her, love confession making her needy. though she wanted to savor namaari (thanks to her newfound energy of course), she knew that this kiss was all they needed right now.

“if you want, we can start taking one thing out from the basket at a time,” Raya said as she broke the kiss, “i think we should start with the plant since it hasn’t had water since i got it and is probably dead.”

namaari chucked at this, “of course you’d get me a thirsty, half-dead plant to slip into my room. you’re a menace.”

“maybe,” raya began, breaking her sentence up by pressing another kiss to namaari’s soft lips with a smile, “but i’m your menace so you can’t get mad.”

“i love you, dep la.” namaari said, leaning over with the bear still clutched in their hands to rest their head on raya’s shoulder.

“and i love you, princess.” raya echoed, placing an arm around her girlfriend to pull her closer as they looked out at the water as the moonlight glistened on it.

[laboflove]

Oikawa & Iwa X FR

•Aged up•

Word Count- 2363

❗Warnings❗{Smut, angst, praising, infatuation, ridiculing, cheating, body shaming}

A/N: Thicc Y/N who's dating Oikawa and although he says he loves her it doesnt seem that way.

He smiles as he sees your eyebrows pushed together, you were always so cute when you were angry, he just wanted to keep making fun of you to see that face. "Tooru" you suddenly say making his smile fade, "Yeah?" He says confused and your phone buzzes, "Nevermind, I have to go, Iwa is here" you say then kiss his cheek before leaving.

A frown forms on his face as he sees you walk off, you were always hanging out with Iwaizumi. It made him mad because you were HIS girlfriend not Iwaizumi's. He huffs then leaves as well, whatever, hed just make you remember how great it is to date him.

You walk in to find him on your bed and he smiles, "Hey" you both say, you climb onto the bed forgetting about today at work and he pulls you onto his chest. "Did you gain weight? Damn" he says with a chuckle making the thoughts come back, "I think, I'll lose it dont worry" you whisper as you move off and onto the side.

He pulls you close, his hands trailing your body making you anxious, you werent skinny like other girls, you had curves and Oikawa would always tease you about it, middle school to now and you always tried to lose weight but youd gain it back. An endless cycle and honestly the last thing you wanted right now was for him to be touching you like this.

Yet you dont stop him, instead closing your eyes and trying to fall asleep but his hands get more touchy, soon enough spreading your legs. "Not tonight Tooru" and his frown appears again, that's the second time this week you've called him that. "Okay" he says then turns around and you both fall asleep, one angry and confused and the other filled with dark thoughts.

"I just dont understand, shes been calling me Tooru this entire week, why?" He says as he passes the ball to Iwa, "Its your name" He says making him huff. He knew it was his name but you've never called him that before, so why now?!

"I dont like it, she never calls me that so why now? Did I do something wrong?" He says and Iwa stops, "You always make fun of her, im surprised she hasn't dumped you yet" and Oikawa's mouth goes dry. His biggest worry, something he never wants to happen, for you two to break up, you meant everything to him, youd always lift him up, give him pointers and take care of him. You couldn't leave him, you're all he had.

"S-she knows I'm just kidding, I don't mean any of it" he says then the ball flies towards him, "Iwa-!", "It always sounds like you mean it, you tell her shes fat, that shes not pretty enough, that she isnt smart, terrible shit but you never say that you're just kidding. Even then you shouldnt say shit like that to someone who already deals with criticism as it is, you especially shouldn't say it to her because shes your goddam girlfriend" he leaves and Oikawa clenches his fists.

"Hey!" And he looks back, "Do you like her?!" He yells out earning a nod making his blood boil, "I've liked her since middle school, even more in high school and the most right now, but she made the stupidest decision on dating you" and he walks off again.

"Youd never leave me right?" He asks as he rests his head on your chest, you dont answer making him look up with dim eyes, "You would?" He asks and you sigh, "If something were to happen yes but just breaking up with you for no reason would not happen" and he nods. "Um, what would be the reason?" He whispers remembering the conversation with Iwa, "If one of us cheats, I'd never do it but well..." you stop and he looks up at you.

"I-im sorry, I'll never hurt you like that ever again, so please dont leave me" you nod then place a kiss on his head.

He looks back at the tv but hes barely focusing on it, only remembering that night. He was drunk, saying terrible stuff and when he woke up he found you in front of him, sitting down, looking super tired and your eyes were so dry and red. He didnt know why till he looked around and found unfamiliar clothes, women's clothes.

You didnt talk to him about it, none of you brought it up and soon you were both back to normal but he knew that all trust created was gone.

His thoughts are broken by the familiar buzz pattern and you pull the phone to your ear, "Hey" you say with a smile, why cant you smile like that when you talk to him? Why doesnt your voice get all cute and soft with him? Why is it only with Iwa?

"Oh I'm with Oikawa" you say as your hand runs through his hair, he smiles and even more as you rest it on his cheek. "I-iwa" your hand twitches slightly and he can feel your aura change, "Dont call me until your done with that crap, God, you're worse than Oikawa" you put your phone down and he looks up at you.

"What's wrong?" He asks but you shake your head, "Its nothing, just Iwa being a bit of an asshole" he nods and you look at the tv.

"He doesnt love you, he says all that shit which he shouldnt be saying, what if he cheats on you again huh? "

You let out a sigh then close your eyes, uh oh, you're pissed.

"Hey" you hear, turning around you see them and shoot a smile, "Hey guys" you say as you slowly come to a stop. "Whatre you doing here?" One asks, "Oh uh well you know working out" you say and they nod. "Any specific reason? You look perfect already" you laugh making them confused, "Yeah right, if I was Oikawa wouldnt judge me 24/7" you say and they tilt their heads.

"Anyways, I'm gonna get back to this" you say with a small smile and they head to the other side, "Whatre you thinking?" Akaashi asks as Bokuto glares in your direction. "I'm thinking that I want to kill Oikawa", "As much as I'd love to help you do that, its illegal" he says and he huffs. "Only if i get caught".

"Whatre you doing?" He asks as his arms wrap around your waist, you step off and you smile, "Yes" you say and he rubs your stomach, it's not as squishy as before. "I finally lost 15 pounds" you whisper with a large smile and although he should be congratulating you it doesnt make sense. "Whyd you lose weight?" He asks and you look back, "For you, you wanted me to lose it remember?" You say and he looks at you in the mirror.

"I'll love you no matter what", "Haha, yeah right Mr. I want a trophy wife who's beautiful and perfect" you say then move away, his heart clenches hearing you say the words he regrets telling you. He didn't want anyone but you.

"Y-you know I love you right?" He says and you look at him, you dont say anything making his heart break. "I do Tooru, it's just hard to believe" and he looks down, "Okay".

"Y/N" he says for the thousandth time this night, "Are you even listening to me?! It's like you dont care about me! You're always off with Iwaizumi doing God knows what! Why cant you just love me! Only me!" The tears keep falling but you dont look back and you dont let a sob escape. For three days it's been like this, him finding anything to ridicule about and making sure you knew how terrible of a girlfriend you were.

You stand then look at the tree your parents gave you, well it was meant for both of you, something to resemble your love for each other, always growing and alive till death.

A sigh escapes your lips and you walks up to it, "Just as I suspec-", "If I cut this down does that mean were done too?" You ask surprising him. "What does that mean?" He asks and you turn to look at him, "I want to break up" and he looks down. You're crying, you're actually crying, hes never seen you cry, you always refused to look at him whenever you did so hes never got to see it and he wishes he never did.

"Why?", "Why? Why?! Why else Tooru?! Every second I spend with you hurts me! The love in our relationship cant even compare to the amount of pain there is! You give me so much shit and i try to be better, i try to become someone perfect for you but theres always something! I dont love Iwa like I love you! I never have! I only love you but it's like you dont think i do! Even though you're the one that cheated! You're the one that broke the trust! I should've broke up with you before!" You cover your mouth realizing what you just said and you look away.

You were right but why did you say all that stuff to him, he looks at you but quickly looks away. "I'm leaving" you say then rush past him, "W-where are you going?" He asks as he follows you upstairs, you couldn't leave, not like this. He has to say sorry, he has to fix it, he cant lose you!

"I dont know but I cant stay here" you pack stuff up as you avoid his hands, "No" he suddenly says as you reach for the front door. "Bye" you leave in a rush and he looks around, "NO! GET BACK HERE!" and he falls to ground. It actually happened, you left him, you left him and it's his fault, who's going to love him now? Who's going to help him when he gets sick and who's he going to tease?

He leans in as he holds you close, "I love you" he whispers but you stop him, "Its been two months yet you still push me away", "I didnt have sex with Tooru till we were five months in" you say but he doesnt stop, "Oh c'mon, you know you want to so ju-", "Can you stop? I'm really not in the mood for anything like this" you say as you push his hands away from your stomach and thighs.

"Oh I get it" he says as he pins your hands above your head, "You think I'm like Oikawa, that I'll point out your flaws, that I'll think you're ugly, that I dont actually want you" he says into your ear and you look away, he was right and you both knew that. "Well guess what, we all have flaws, I dont think you're ugly and damn do I want you" he kisses you hard but your squirm in his embrace.

"N-no Iwa stop" you let out with a soft moan as he rubs his knee against your clothed heat, "Why? We both want this, you just cant admit it" his tongue trails up your neck as you resist him only making him want you more. "So soft and you always smell so good" he murmurs as you grind against his knee although your mind is saying you dont want this.

"So pretty, especially these moans" desperate whines leave your mouth as he slowly undresses you, "Heh, I think we should take this to the bed" he says as he looks down at your naked body.

Your arms cover yourself as much as they can as he lifts you bridal style, "M-maybe we should wait, i-i should lose a few m-", "Shut the hell up or else I will tie you up" you nod fast and he places you on the bed. "Fuck me" you turn red seeing his eyes take you in, he reaches for his shirt and you move up to help him but he pushes you down making you bounce a bit.

"Stay right there" he undresses as you watch, once hes done he spreads your legs making your body heat up and filling you with so many emotions. "So perfect" he says as he pushes in slowly, you hiss slightly at the feeling you havent felt in such a long time. "Ah- no, Haji-!" He thrusts harder and faster making the frame hit the wall, over and over.

"So warm, so tight and it feels so good" moans leave his mouth making you bite your lip, this felt so different, way too different. "Dont think about him" he says as he thrusts hard sending your eyes wide open, "I-I dont know how he fucked you, or if hes a goddamn sub but dont! Fucking! Think about him!" He growls out with a thrust each time, feeling angry that even now you're still thinking about him. "Sorrysorrysorry!"

Pants leave his mouth as cries leave yours, "God I love you, I love you so much" he mutters as he looks at your pink cheeks and tears falling down your face, he lowers next to your ear as one hand holds your thigh as the other holds your head close to him. "I love the way you just clamp around me" his hips slow down, grinding against you, "I feel like coming every time I thrust into you, that's how good you feel" you tighten around him as the praises keep coming.

Why did this feel so good? Just his words were getting you there and it was so embarrassing that he made you feel this way. "I just cant believe that the woman I've loved since I was 13 is finally mine, that were here together and you're in my arms" he stops to kiss you and you sniffle slightly, "You can come now" a soft cry fills the room as you come and he thrusts a bit more leading to groans and a warm feeling in your core.

"You're mine, only mine".

[flooffybits]

What About Us?

Idol: Jennie Kim (Blackpink)

Anon: hii! can i request a jennie scenario wherein she read a lot of comments/tweets about her fem s/o about how her s/o is only using her for her money/fame and bc of that she kind of believed it and grew distant and her s/o overhears her calling her a gold digger in front of the other members while they were hanging out and s/o gets hurt and just leaves and try to give back all jennie's gifts or something like that? angst with fluffy ending pls!! i love your scenarios always!!

Author’s note: I went too angsty with this and I had no idea how to make it fluffy, but it doesn’t end too sadly hopefully

pretty sure she doesnt even care about jennie

shes obviously dating jennie because shes in blackpink

such a fake

Jennie’s frown deepened when she saw the many malicious comments online. Of course, she’s used to people sending her hate and having rumors spread about her. But this time around, the hate was not directed at her, but rather her girlfriend.

It’s been half a year since she’s come out to the public and introduced you to the world, and even with the various support she’s gotten for having the courage of coming out, the backlash of it was the people attacking you with so many hurtful words.

Jennie knows you’re aware of them, but you’ve never spoken up about it that she wonders if you find them bothersome or not. It’s made her think.

Were you only with her because of her fame? Did you really love her?

Lately, she couldn’t help reading such comments. When she first introduced you to the public as her girlfriend, she kept watching, wanting her fans to be accepting towards you and having the same respect that they had for her. But the longer time passed, the more assumptions were thrown at you.

And your dismissive behavior did not help in easing her worries.

As a result, she’s been pulling herself back whenever the two of you were together, always eyeing you when you spent time with her and trying to notice the way you would react to her every time. Were you being sincere to her or not?

She hadn’t even realized how much she let the comments get to her head.

“I just don’t know.” She sighed once when she was with her members, eating breakfast. You were sound asleep in her bed when she left you, so she decided it was the best time she could talk to her friends about the mess that was going through her head.

She didn’t think talking to you about it would help her because obviously, she think, you’ll defend yourself.

Jisoo pursed her lips at her friend when she lowered her fork. “I don’t really think Y/n is like that.” She stated. “I mean, she’s been with you longer than the public knows. You haven’t had these thoughts before.” She added and Chaeyoung nodded. “She’s right. Y/n is a sweet girl.”

“Maybe when in public? You know that gold diggers pretend to be nice to get what they want.” Jennie reasoned and this time, Lisa cut in, a deep frown on her face. “Hey, that’s not fair. You’re not sure if she’s being genuine, but that doesn’t mean you should be calling Y/n unnie a gold digger.” She retorted, making Jennie sigh as she rubbed her temple.

“Then how am I going to tell? I can’t flat out ask her because that’s obviously too forward.” She huffs, unknowing of your presence lingering by the door.

You had woken up a little after Jennie left the bed. And in your tired state, you didn’t get up right away, only when your stomach grumbled. But as you neared the kitchen and heard more of the girls’ voices, your sleepiness began to evaporate and your heart started to crack when you heard the things your supposed girlfriend was saying about you.

The moment she had called you a gold digger, tears had already fallen from your eyes and you quickly but quietly left for her bedroom to collect your things. You switched out of the clothes Jennie had lent you the night prior, tossing them in the basket, and then slipping on your hoodie and jeans. When you had everything, you hurriedly left her a note on her nightstand, making up the excuse that something came up before silently leaving the dorm after making sure that all of the girls were still in the kitchen.

"Unnie, if you can't trust Y/n, then what's the point of being in a relationship with her?" Chaeyoung couldn't help but ask and Jennie quickly quieted down, staring at her plate. "If you're having thoughts like these, I don't think it's fair for you to be doubting her like this when she could possibly be with you without the thought of money or fame."

"Chaeyoung is right. Personally, I doubt she's ever really thought of doing that to you. She's been sweet and loving to you, we can see that when you're together." Jisoo frowned. "It's just sad that you're letting other people's opinions cloud your view of your own girlfriend."

That made Jennie wince as she dropped her head and just stare at her plate, no longer hungry when she realizes that her friends were right. You’ve been together for years, and yet she only began to doubt you because her fans refused to trust you.

She just couldn't seem to shake off the doubt that was implanted into her brain after all the things she's read for the past few weeks.

"In my opinion, break up." Lisa says sternly, pushing her chair back as she brought her empty plate to the sink. "If you don't trust her, there's no point in staying."

Chaeyoung sighed as she looked to her best friend. Of course, the younger girl was right and she understands why she's upset, but they had no right interfering with Jennie's relationship because it simply wasn't their business. The best they could do was listen and give her advice, the rest was for Jennie to deal with.

"I'll go talk to her." The blonde murmured, quietly exiting the kitchen and leaving the two older girls alone.

Jisoo eyed Jennie from across the table and kept her arms crossed, her lips pressed into a thin line. She wanted to help her friend. But she also wasn't very happy with the way she had quickly discarded all the struggles you went through together before this moment.

She was your friend, too, and it would be a lie if she said she didn't care for you as much as she did for her members.

"Why don't you get ready? We have a shoot in a few hours." She tells the younger girl and Jennie sits there for a few more minutes, contemplating if she was capable of looking at you after everything she's just said about you.

Eventually, she does go. Quietly, she heads to her room, wondering if you were still asleep since you haven't come out yet. But when she peeks inside, she's surprised to see no one there.

The bed is made, the clothes you used were put properly away and then everything else was as she left it except for the piece of paper that was left on her desk.

Upon further inspection, she recognizes your handwriting and furrows her brows at the message. It makes her suspicions grow, but at the same time, her stomach churns. She was unaware of you hearing her conversation with them, girls so she doesn’t give it too much thought, simply sending you a text to say you should text or call her when you were free before she proceeded to her closet and pick out her outfit for the day.

..

Jennie doesn't hear from you for the rest of the day, which confuses her.

You've always texted her throughout the day to see how she was doing, always asking her if she's eaten or drank enough water. So, now that you weren't checking up on her has thrown her off the loop.

It was already evening and she was checking her phone in case she missed a text or call, but found none.

Instead, when she arrives back with the girls, she's surprised to see you leaving her room, hands tucked in the pockets of your jacket with your head down.

Something about it sets her off, and without thinking, she scoffs at you while crossing her arms. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" She asks you, and you're surprised to see that she's already home.

"So, you ignored me for the whole day because you had something "important" to do. And when I come, I find you trying to, what, steal from me?"

"Jennie." Jisoo calls warningly while Chaeyoung and Lisa looked worried when you refuse to look at them.

But Jennie didn't mean to say those things. In her fear of finding out that you were using her, her emotions blinded her and had forced the words out, her heart pounding against her rib cage before she's watching you finally bring your hand out of your pocket and show her the spare key she had given you for the dorms.

"I came to drop this off." You try to keep your tone even, but it's so soft and fragile that the worry in the girls worsened. Jennie's expression even softened, but the confusion set in at your words. "What?"

You lift your head and Lisa gasps when she sees the tear tracks and red eyes, a clear indication that you've been crying. But before any of them could say anything, you were already dropping the key on the table.

"I'm leaving. Don't worry, I didn't touch anything."

"Y/n-" Chaeyoung tried calling for you, but you only shook your head and walked to the door, but Jennie tailed after you, latching onto your hand right before you could leave.

But before she could say a word, you yanked your hand away, whirling around to glare at her despite the hot tears that were already cascading down your face. "Don't fucking touch me." You gritted out, pain laced in your voice as Jennie stared at you in disbelief.

"Y/n, what is your problem?" She snapped back, your attitude setting her off from being ignored the whole day, but instead of backing out like usual, you glared back at her. "You left without even a proper goodbye, ignored me the whole day, and suddenly you're in the dorm without telling anyone, then you have the audacity to be angry?"

At that, you scoff before stepping closer to her. "I have no reason to explain myself to you." You say while stubbornly wiping your face. "The only reason I wasn't replying to you was because I was looking and packing everything you own and then dropped them off here."

At your words, Jennie's anger vanished and she looked at a loss. Her things?

You stared at her for a while before shaking your head, defeat on your features as you step away once more. "I'm not gonna stick around with someone who'd rather believe what everyone says instead of trusting me and calling me a gold digger, where her friends were the ones who defended me behind my back. I'm done."

Her heart jumped to her throat when she realized that you'd heard what she said to the girls. With the sudden revelation, she isn't quite sure what she could tell you.

"I just... I thought-"

"That the people who don't know a damn thing about me were right? That the person who stuck up for you every single time would actually treat you like a fucking toy?" You guessed for her. "They're my fans!" She defends and you frown at her, seeing clearly just where she held you.

"Yeah. And what did that make us?"

You knew that some fans wouldn't accept the fact that Jennie was dating, much more a girl, but you didn't really think that she would choose them over you, especially like this.

"Forget it, Jennie. All of your things are in your room. Goodbye."

But Jennie wouldn't let you leave when she moved to shut the door just as you opened it. "Can we talk about this?" She pleaded, panic running through her veins despite her earlier anger.

"Talk about what? Jennie, you called me a fucking gold digger because your fans said so?" You shot at her. "Do you realize how that makes our relationship?"

“I’m sorry!” She yelled back, refusing to budge as she blocked your only exit. “I know that it was dumb of me, but please, let’s talk about it.” She tries again and you try so hard to fight your tears back with the inner turmoil that was inside of you.

You wanted her to be sorry, you wanted her to take back everything she’s said behind your back, but you know that once words were let go, there was no turning back. The damage was permanent and there was no changing that no matter how many times she apologized.

Yet your heart was so damn stubborn that you couldn’t outright deny her request. So, she saw that and used it to her advantage, no matter how wrong she knows it is.

Leading you back to her room, she had noticed that her members all disappeared to their own quarters and she just hopes that they can leave things to her. That is, if she can handle what’s about to happen.

Entering her room, she spots the two boxes at the foot of her bed and she inhales sharply, seeing the necklace she had given you for your first anniversary sitting at the top of them. Only now did she notice that you weren’t wearing it, knowing fully well that you never took it off once she gave it to you.

“Y/n, I know that this is messed up, but please just... we can work this out, I swear.” She starts and you stare at her in disbelief. “What can you do to make this work? What did I do to make you even think of me like that, Jennie?” You ask in a broken voice that makes her heart crack.

“You know me. I have not once asked you to spend a single dime on me or this relationship. I have never demanded that you get me gifts or to pay for me when we go out. You know that I argue with you on who pays the bill. So, why?”

For the first time in her life, Jennie didn’t know what to say. She was always so sure of herself and the things she wanted, but now, staring at you while you desperately tried to understand where things have gone wrong has rendered her speechless.

You stand, staring at each other, and your tears refuse to stop as you covered your face with your hands and let out a shaky breath. Jennie withers at the sight of you looking so weak, so vulnerable, because of her. So, she doesn’t hesitate as she steps forward to wrap her arms tightly around you.

“I know that I was wrong to believe them.” She mutters when she feels you weakly pushing against her, but she holds on tight, refusing to let you go. “I was  just so clouded with what everyone was saying and I was scared of talking to you about this.” She closed her eyes when your pushing started to weaken. “You’re right. I made our relationship look like an absolute joke for trusting someone who isn’t you and you have every right to be pissed at me. But please, I’ll do my best to be better at this. I should have known better, and you deserve so much more than what I put you through.” She could feel her own tears start to fall, but she doesn’t bother them.

You’ve stopped resisting her and just let your hands grab a fistful of her shirt, sobbing into her chest. “Please, just give me one last chance. I promise, this won’t ever happen again.” She whispers and the room is only filled with your sobs.

You’re both on the floor when Jennie feels your legs giving out. She holds you because she knows that you’re in pieces.

“Why did you have to say it?” You cried into her chest and she kisses your head while frowning to herself. She shouldn’t have done it, but all she could do now was make up for it.

She’s ruined three years in a single moment. But she swears that she’ll spend the rest of her life making up for it, even when you move past this and maybe forget about it happening.

“I’m so sorry.”

[milkacchan]

Request for anon: Omg could you please make a part two of an S/O who's stupid good with kids but with Shinsou, tamaki, deku, and aizawa??

This is a lil long bc it was 4 characters! And I kinda changed Aizawa up a little bit so I hope you still like it.

Deku-

• Shit happens

• Shit happens all the time

• This specific incident involved a quirk manifestation and a child.

• You and two had just been walking

• Just chilling out after a rigorous training day

• Then there was screaming and panicking. Your head snapped in its direction, he hadn't fully processed it before you'd taken off

• Some kids quirk had manifested. It seemed pretty severe.

• It looked like some kind of energy quirk, like a force field or something.

• The kid was scared, she was panicking and thrashing from her place in the air

• He stood behind you, surveying the environment to find a solution

• And he almost missed you jumping in until her heard your voice.

"Okay baby, look at me, just look at me and breathe. You'll be okay, Just breathe."

• You were walking towards her, trying to get her to slow her breaths. The more she panicked the worse it would get.

• He stood where he was, he didn't want to overwhelm her, he decided he'd let you take care of it.

• He watched quietly as you breathed with her, again reassuring that'd she'd be just fine.

• And he watched as the field flickered away and the girl fell. His body lurched foward on instinct and he was beyond relieved when he saw that you had caught her.

• He let out a breath as the girl gripped your shirt and sobbed into your shoulder.

• A hand reached up to hold the back of her head

• "it's okay," you murmured and he smiled

• It seemed to come easy to you, nurturing people. It seemed to come easy calming this girl down.

• He turned his attention to reassuring the bystanders that the two of you were okay and that you'd be taking the girl home. They dispersed slowly after his urging for them to leave.

• You were standing now, the girl still in your arms, holding on for dear life.

• Poor thing was still shaking

• "Look," you hummed. "This is my friend, he's going to walk with us to get you home. That okay?"

• Your hand was rubbing her back now and your cheek was pressed against her temple

• Dekus heart fluttered

• God you were beautiful

• And strong

• And just everything he ever wanted

• The small girl nodded, keeping her face hidden, whispering a soft sorry

• "Don't be sorry princess, you didn't do anything wrong." You pressed a kiss to the top of her head and Deku sees the girls grip tighten.

• He has a hand on your lower back during the walk to the girls house, you'd somehow managed to find where it was even with all the crying the girl did

• He watched as you hand the girl over to her mother who profusely thanks you

• Information is traded as she says she wants to make it up to you even after your assurance that it was no trouble at all

• And he's holding your hand again when the two of you leave, going on and on about how well you did in the situation

• He's so proud

Shinsou:

• He realizes just how good with kids you are when he she's you interact with Eri

• I mean everytime the two of you are together its wholesome

• He takes note when Aizawa tries to apologize for her always being with you and you brush it off

• You enjoyed her company and found no problem in it

• Shinsou tucked that piece away for later

• The girl adored you, genuinely

• And you stopped at nothing to make sure she was okay

• She'd spend a lot of time in the 1-A dorms with you, just as he would.

• If she said she was hungry, you'd be up to make her food in no time

• If she cried, you'd have her on your lap, wiping the tears from her cheeks as you assured her it was okay

• and he'd watch, soft smile gracing his lips

• She'd spent the night with you on more than one occasion

• Nightmares were prominent with Eri

• Staying with you seemed to help that

• He'd sit beside you as you braided her hair

• He'd listen to her ramble to you and he'd watch you nod and hum in response

• He'll lay on one side of you and Eri will lay on the other side, curled into your side as she watches whatever disney movie she picked

• and his heart will swell when the two of you sing along to the songs

• When Eries feeling down, she comes to you for comfort

• You'll tell her how beautiful she is

• He'll watch you hold her to your chest and rub her back

• He watches you play with her hair, kiss her cheeks, telling her how amazing she is

• How you're lucky to have her with you

• He'll watch as she falls asleep in your arms, content

• And it always makes him realizes just how lucky he is to be with you

• How lucky he is to have /you/

• How lucky Eri is to have you

• I mean this man fr fr in love w you

• This one time, you and shinsou had fallen asleep watching a movie, it was about 3am when there was a small knock on the door

• You get up to answer it and Shinsou wakes up to you getting up

• Sure enough its Eri, she's sniffling and holding her stuffed animal

• And immediately your kneeling in front of her wiping her cheeks

• "Baby what's wrong?"

"I had a nightmare...I didn't want to wake mr. Aizawa up. I didn't want to make him mad..."

"Oh honey," you kiss her nose and pick her up, rubbing her back in response to her small whine. "You want some tea? Then you can stay with me for the night? We can tell Mr. Aizawa in the morning, he won't get mad."

She nods, laying her head on your shoulder. "Hi Shinsou," she waves weakly. "I'm sorry for waking you up too."

"Hi Eri," and he gets up too, walking over and running a hand through her hair. "It's okay, you're safe here. We won't let anything happen to you."

She nods again

He follows the two of you down the hallway and to the kitchen

Mina, Kaminari, and Sero are still up on the couch. He snickers as you glare at them.

"You guys should be asleep. Get out."

Mina groans and Sero grins knowingly, pulling the other two out.

• I mean shinous heart is melting rn

• you're like totally momming out

• You've got Eri in one arm, humming by her ear as you turned the stove on to get a kettle boiling

• You're swaying gently, readjusting her so she's in the center of your chest

• you run a hand through her hair and she smiles

• And Shinsou swears he could die right there

• Just looking at you interacting with the kid he considers a little sister is enough to kill him fr fr

• His poor heart can't take much more

• Eri lifts her little hands up to cup your cheeks. "You're not going to leave right?"

"Never ever," you smiled, touching your nose to hers.

Then she looked at Shinsou and this man about passed out. "Never." He puts a hand on her head. "We'll always be here,"

• The tea is made, the three of you drink it at the table, bent on getting Eris mind off her nightmare

• And then you carry her upstairs again and down the hall into your bedroom.

• the three of you settle down and you out on a movie (volume low of course) that she can fall asleep too and it's not long before she's out, pressed into your side.

• Shinsou smiles and kisses your temple. "I love you, you know,"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"I love you too. Now stop being a sap, its gross." You stick your tongue out and he let's out a low chuckle.

"You're good with her."

"I want her to be happy," you mumble. "She deserves that at least. And if the world doesnt have anyone else doing it, then I'll do it."

He kisses your temple again. "I know."

• Ever since Eri came to live in the dorms, you've gotten up earlier, mostly to make the girl breakfast

• The whole class realizes it, sometimes they'll try to steal some but you'll obliterate them for trying

• You've always got Eri in some proximity to you when you're cooking. Usually she'll watch

• Shinsou finds himself sneaking into the 1A dorms in the mornings (much to his classes distaste) but how could he not?

Aizawa-

• He realizes that you talk a lot of shit about how much you 'hate kids' but when it comes to them, you're always doing your best to make sure they're comfortable and happy

• Its another pro hero moment

• His class is attacked and you happen to be there and this man watches you go FERAL protecting these fucking teenagers and his heart swells and he'd filled with so much fucking pride

• The dumbass villain who fuckin tried is now on the ground in front of you completely beat to a pulp

• Poor guy had no chance

• As soon as you knew he was out your attention had turned to the kids behind you

• You checked for injuries, concussions, made sure they felt okay

• Mina looks like she's on the verge of tears, deadass hits you with 'can you be my mom?????'

• Kaminari and Sero are nodding in agreement. 'Pls'

• He tried to tease you about it

• "Shouta I'll knock your ass out too, shut your fucking mouth,"

• 'Reluctantly' becomes class mom

• Deadass

• You find yourself bringing snacks or making them something and Shouta brings it in 🤢

• Ur like oh god ew

• 'Shouta take this shit in for ur fuckin kids'

'You mean OUR kids'

• That was instance one

• Happens again but this time in the city during a robbery with smaller kids, much smaller

• And you don't waste a second, you're by their side

• Checking to make sure none if them are physically hurt

• So then you work on calming them down, telling them to breathe and just look at you

• Gently rubbing they're cheeks and keeping them close to you

• Shoutas 🥺

• Midnights 🥺

• Hizashis 🥺

• "M scared-"

"I know baby, but its gonna be okay. We won't let anything happen, okay?"

• And you carry these little fuckers out

• Ones on your back

• You've got one on each hip

• And another sitting on your shoulders

• Aizawa see's right through you

• "So...you say you don't like kids??"

"Hizashi I will LITERALLY hang you by your underwear, get away from me."

• God one time he see's you singing to this kid who's panicking and he deadass thinks he's gonna cry bc you're so precious

• And then Eri comes into the picture and you dont even pretend to hate kids anymore

• This child becomes your daughter

• And he's v happy about it because he wasn't one to really think about having kids

• But he's not gonna let Eri go, she's been through to much

• Not to mention practically adopting shinsou

• He's glad you're doing well with them

• They've seen your soft sides, much to your distaste, but they dont know that

• speaking of shinsou

• You do lowkey mom him

• Not to a super extent

• You're more like the cool aunt w mom tendencies

• But they're both happy to have some consistencies

• Shinsou knows that he's always welcome to come talk to you (and Aizawa but you know sometimes shit pops up that he's not particularly comfy w and you seem to be good at that)

• And he does

• Aizawa has accidently overheard his fair share of conversations between you two

• It always makes him happy that you all connect on that level

• I mean he wouldn't mind having a biological child

• But he's content with the family dynamic they have rn

• as much as you deny it you'd be a great mother

Tamaki:

• Tamaki isn't /bad/ w kids but he's not super great with them either

• Anxiety do be a bitch

• You always seem to ease up around kids

• He likes to watch

• Kids just seem to gravitate towards you, regardless of where you are, genuinely

• At the park? Oh boy he's ready to watch you interact with the kiddos

• Restaurant? Oh yeah, he's ready for some 5 year old to waddle up and talk.

• But in particularly rough situations, he's always super impressed. You seem to do WONDERS to calm kids down.

• The other pro heros could never.

• Endeavor? No.

• All might? Who she?

• No baby, it's all you.

• Anyway, one time, yall were out on a date.

• Y'all were f i s h i n g

• Aka you had been itching to go outside and decide to teach Amijiki to fish and he agreed bc why not

• So there you are, outside in the hot sun, in a crop top and shorts on a dock

• He's about 6 feet away, still talking distance, but far enough so your lines wouldn't get tangled

• He's not having a bad time at all, he's trying to ignore anyone else that might be there

• bc he wants to be w you and is tired of his anxiety getting in the way

• anyway, he almost misses the little girl that walks up.

• He looks over and she looks like she's gonna cry.

• She prolly has anxiety too tbh

• "Um...can-can you help me?"

• you look down and smile, "yes ma'am, what can I do for you?"

She held up her own small rod. "I uh...I lost my hook and I forgot how my dad tied everything on.."

"Want me to show you?"

"Yes please," her gaze flickered down.

"Okay first things first, do you have sun screen and water?"

She shook her head.

• So before you do anything, he watches you spray sunscreen on the little girl and give her a water bottle, which she only takes after you reassure that it's okay for her to have

• Then you call him over

"Amajiki, baby come here so I can show you how to do it too."

And he listens, reeling his line in and sitting next to you

"This is Amajiki, he's my friend okay? I'm teaching him how to fish too."

• The girl seems to relax at that and you get to work

• But he's not paying attention to what you're actually doing

• He's watching you

• You've got a bright smile on, your voice is soft as you show her the steps

• And once you get done tying the swivel on and putting a hook on, you hand her a worm

"Go on, bait it,"

• The girl does so with a small comfortable smile

• His heart melts

• You're just so damn good with them like you're literally a goddess already

• And this just makes it better

• You show her how to cast right and then she's all set

• She ends up sitting with you two for a little over an hour

• Then she waves goodbye and bounds off

• Amajiki kisses your nose gently. "You're so cool, bunny."

"You big sap, she told me you were her favorite hero. Did you zone out or something."

"Yeah," his face flushed. "I did."

[perksofhs]

‘Please forgive me, I need you baby’

Harry and the missus disagree, and as always, the missus is right but it may be too late...

It had been 3 weeks. 3 weeks since he’d left. 3 weeks since you’d last seen him. 3 weeks of unbearable pain that you could no longer endure. All you could think about was him. You’d find your mind wandering, thinking about where he was, what he was doing, and especially who he was with. The argument that ended things had started with you being jealous of one of Harry’s female friends who, although he couldn’t see it, was getting a little too touchy feely and you’d been honest and told him how you felt. The argument then turned nasty, misguided accusations from both sides. You’d always trusted him and he’d always trusted you but in a fight you’d both bring up things from the past to back up your stupid arguments and this time it was too much and he couldn’t take it.

“Fine then Harry do whatever you want, go call your best friend, I don’t give a fuck! I’m sure she’ll love the attention that she seems to so desperately crave from you!” You’d regretted it the second you’d said it but there was never any stopping you in the heat of the moment. “For fuck sake! You bring her up all the time! I’d never do anything with her and I never fucking have either so stop! Do you not trust me? Is that it? 2 years, 2 years I’ve been nothing but loyal and for some reason every argument we have you throw it out there that I’m somehow going to cheat on you! I can’t take it anymore! If there’s no trust there’s no relationship!” Tears were brimming in his eyes and yours, your lip was between your teeth, physically stopping yourself from saying anything else because you knew, you knew that it was the last straw. “Don’t say that, you know I trust you, I always have, I just don’t trust her around you Harry, and I’m sorry but I just can’t see it any other way” you were now quietly sobbing. 

You’d never been the jealous type in any other relationship you’d had, but to be fair you’d never gone as deep and were never as committed to a relationship before this. You were in so deep and that scared you a little, the thought of it being taken away and you being alone again was just too much and when an argument arose you’d find yourself so shaken that you couldn’t control your insecurities and they’d just blurt out. It was strange though, Harry had women fawning over him wherever he went but none of them had ever made you insecure like this one particluar friend of his did. Mel was a tall leggy blonde, the typical LA instagram model type, and you were not that at all. You weren’t model thin or 6ft tall. You weren’t immaculately dressed in designer labels from head to toe every day. You didnt drive a luxury car or live in an expensive hill top home. You were just you. 

Unbeknownst to you, you just being you was what Harry loved the most about you. He loved that you weren’t like anyone else he had ever met. He loved that you were unequivocally yourself and you refused to change to yourself to fit a stupid mold. He loved that you didn’t give a single fuck about followers or likes or any sort of ‘public image’. His past relationships had all ended with the realisation that he was just being used, almost all of his ex girlfriend’s used him as a springboard into fame and nothing more. You were the opposite, you were grounded and real and he couldnt have bene more in love with you if he tried. He’d fallen just as hard as you had, he had planned out your future together, he could picture it all. He was so sure you were the one that he’d even bought a ring. 

“I don’t get why you think Mel would ever try anything like that with me? She knows we’re together, she even tells me how much she likes you and how much she wishes she could find something like what we have! You;re just fucking paranoid for fuck sake” Harry says, his brow furrowed in frustration and confusion. He cannot fathom why you would be so threatened by her. “Harry how can you not see how she looks at you? Or how she speaks to you or even about you! She like you and you’re fucking blind if you cannot see that!” You yell, hurt and genuinely baffled as to how he has been so oblivious to her advances. You let a sigh of frustration as the tears continue to rolls down your already mascara stained cheeks. Harry’s head was now in his hands as he tried to make sense of the argument. He was mad, upset and confused like he had never been and before you knew it he was on his feet, grabbing his keys and slamming the door behind him as he fled the small flat. 

You shake your head to stop yourself from playing that moment back for what feels like the millionth time since that night. You couldn’t stop thinking about him, about what you had and what you could have had if that night hadn’t happened. As you lay in the bed you had become pretty much attached to for the last 3 weeks your phone buzzed on your bedside table. You heart skips a beat still every time a text comes through, just hoping that its him, praying that its him, but it never is. 

Reluctantly you roll over, reaching for the phone and adjusting yourself to sit up for the first time this morning. You rub your eyes before tapping the screen and watching as your phone unlocks and revelas the message. Your heart stops as you read the 4 words on the screen. 

Harry xx: I’m coming over 

It took you a full minute to take in the words on the screen. 3 weeks of nothing and then suddenly this. It makes no sense. You quickly reel yourself back in, jumping up from the bed knowing he doesnt live far and he always texts you just before he pulls out of the driveway. You pad across the room to the nearest mirror, taking in the sight of your tangled hair and dark cirlces. You looked as you’d expect someone who hadnt slept for more than a couple of hours in 3 weeks would look. You were only in one of his soft tees, he had a drawer full at your flat, his excuse for it being ‘back up clothes just in case’, but really he knew how much you loved wearing them and he liked knowing that there was always a piece of him there all the time. 

You wandered into the living room, noticing the dirty dishes and used tissues you give the room a quick tidy. Knowing your appearance would enough of a giveaway for your state of mind without the flat giving away just how depressed you had been. After you tidy you find yourself on the couch, your head swirling in an attempt to prepare for what may be about to happen. Is he coming to officially break it off? Is he coming to make up? Is is coming back for his things? You can’t stop yourself from catastrophising the situation. The door buzzer snaps you from your thoughts and you approach the intercom. Even on the poor quality of the door cam you could see that he was tired, the bags under his eyes almost as big as yours and if you’re honest it makes you feel a little less self conscious. You press the receiver button and stutter out a “Its open” and watch as he enters the building. 

You wait by the door, your hand already on the door knob when he gently knocks. As you open the door you tak ein the sight before you, he’s in sweats,  his hair disheleved, his eyes puffy and tired. He does the same with you, he can tell immediately the state you have been in, it hurts him to see you just as tired and still just as hurt as when he walked out. He takes a quick breath in an attempt to hold in his tears before letting out a soft “Hi..”.

 “What do you want Harry?” it comes out harsher than you had wanted but he knew you had every right to be mad. “You were right. You were right about everything.” he says, tears welling in eyes. “What do you mean Harry?” you say now even more confused. “You were right about Mel! Fuck baby you were right about it all!” He says, pushing past you into the room. ‘Baby’ god how you missed him calling you that. “Let me get this straight? The last thing you said to me was that I was ‘paranoid’ and now you’re here telling me that I’m not?’ you shoot back, not wanting to immediately accept his grovelling. You could see the guilt as he dropped his head staring at his hands as he fidgeted with the rings on his fingers. “She tried to kiss me” he says, your eyes widening at the revelation. 

Harrys eyes find yours, a wave of panic comes over him “I didnt kiss her back! I promise I didn’t baby. Fuck how could I have been so fucking blind?” he proclaims, walking over to you as you remain gobsmacked by what has just been announced. “I knew it..” you whisper, looking down at the floor with teary eyes. you were amazed that your body could even produce more tears at this point. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you. I’m sorry I called you paranoid, you had every right to be suspicious. I’m sorry that I left you. I’m sorry baby, I’m so sorry.” by this point he’s standing in front of you, desperately trying to get you to look at him. “Please forgive me, I need you baby” he says, gently clasping his fingers with yours, you instinctively grasping his much larger hand. You;d imssed his touch so much. 

You slowly trail your eyes up from ground to finally meet his similarly teary eyes. “Harry you hurt me, you really fucking hurt me” you can’t hold back the tears now. “You couldn’t see what was obvious. You made me think i was crazy. You made me doubt myself. You have to know how painful the last 3 weeks have been.” He could see how hurt you were, and it killed him to think he was the reason. “I know. And I will never be able to apologise enough. I was mad, I thought I finally had a friend who wasn’t trying to manipulate or use me. I was blind. I was stupid. And I’m sorry I didnt call you or message you. I coudlnt bare being left on read or having my calls go unanswered. I also couldnt bare the thought of hearing you cry again. I know my excuses are poor but I just couldnt take it.” tears were now rolling down his cheeks as well. He let go of your hand, rainsing his hands to gently wipe the tears from your cheeks, his gaze not leaving yours for a moment. You unwillingly melted into his touch, you were still hurt but you couldnt deny how much you wanted him to just hold you. You could tell he was genuine in his apology. “Please baby, please say you still love me. Please.” he pleads once more. 

“I never stopped loving you Harry, I could never stop loving you no matter how hard I try.” your heartbreaks the thought of him thinking you didn’t love him because there was no way you couldn’t. “I forgive you, but you have to promise me that you will never do that to me again? I’ll promise to not blow up as easily but you have to promise to believe me. I can’t go through this again. I just can’t” Harry hangs on every word you say, releife evident in his face after you say the words he has been dying to hear. He can’t help but smile “I promise, I promise I will never do that to you again, fuck I love you so much” he says cupping your face before crashing his lips on yours, the kiss expressing how much you both needed each other. You rejoice in that moment for as long as you both need to. The kiss soft yet passionate. As you pull away, your smile matches his. “I missed you baby” you say before pecking another kiss to his lips just to feel them again. 

As you pull away, you bury your face in his chest, taking in the familiar warmth, his arms engulfing you in a much needed hug. Harry presses a kiss to the top of your head, holding you closer than he ever has before, not wanting to let go. “God I love you fucking much.” He says, kissing the crown of your head once more, “I love you too Harry, so fucking much.”. 

Finally, you were both back where you belong, both of you vowing to never hurt each other again. Content. Together. 

Hi lovelies!! This has been sat in my drafts for genuinely a year, a lot has changed since last time I posted. This is yet another installment of ‘The Words You Speak” series. I love writing a bit of fluff on a Sunday! I hope you’re all keeping safe in these crazy times. Enjoy and let me know if there is anything else you want me to write! Requests are always open xx 

[sloppykyuu]

I have another idea but its angst and pretty cliche and I'm so sorry in advance cos u said it makes u upset but I'm in a mood forgive me please

The 3rd years (in this scenario they r in their mid-2nd year) r "secretly" full of shit and not as nice and lovely as everyone thinks even tho they act that way most of the time unless it's just them. So one day during lunch they're sitting in their classroom eating bento together and they're alone and the only other person that is somewhat around is a girl from their class that's sitting alone in the hallway and Iwa points out that she always on her own and that he thinks she has a crush on Issei to which Issei laughs and says that it's just bullshit so Makki bets him to try to talk to u and ask u out so they find out if u r actually into him or not and Issei says yes cos Makki bets a month lunch bentos so Issei starts talking to her the next day and it stays like that for a while and after a few weeks he asks he rout and she says yes and now they're together but Issei being the Idiot he is forgets about it the second he brags to the others about winning until the next day where Makki brings him a lunch and they're about to eat and the girl comes up and asks if she should eat with them and all of them look at her absolutely confused and a bit shocked and ask her why she is asking and when they hear her answer that she wants to spend more time with Issei they all laugh and shes confused and feels uncomfortable but then Oikawa points out that it was just a harmless joke, a prank nothing more nothing less and they're so prepared to see her lose her shit and scream but then it's just quiet and they slowly stop laughing and hear her laugh to herself and watch her walk out of the classroom with her bag and they're uncomfortable now but dont think any of it until a week passes and she hasn't shown up to school since then and they wonder what happend but they dont want to ask anyone cos their reputation and also no one else seems go care or to notice but its starting to stress Issei to the point where he cant sleep but he doesnt tell anyone until he sees her in a bookstore at the end of his 2nd year and sees her school uniform and is shocked to find out she changed school and he goes up to her and wants to apologise but she just laughs in his face and leaves and ever since then he cant sleep and one night he goes out to her place and knocks on her door and when she opens it she wants to slam the door shut again but he is so quick to put his arms around her and slowly he is falling asleep while leaving against her (◍•ᴗ•)

“You ever notice that girl over there?” Iwaizumi had noticed you awhile ago, sitting alone in the hallway, right across from the door. - seemingly content. “She’s always eating alone.”

The other three turn to look your direction. You don’t notice them as they not so inconspicuously stare at you eating your lunch and listening to music. Their silence is broken my a snort from Makki. “She’s probably got a crush on one of us.”

“I’m betting Mattsun.” Iwaizumi adds.

“Dude shut up. She doesn’t even know me how would she have a crush on me?”

“I don’t know man, but you know girls.” The other three boys just look at Makki, eyebrows furrowed because ‘no they don’t girls’. “You should ask her out.”

“That’s kinda fucked u-“

“I’ll give you a month worth of bentos.” Makki cut him. “Ask her out and find out if she likes you.”

He was hesitant at first but how could he pass up free bentos for a month? So, he picked himself up from the seat and made his way over to you. The other three couldn’t hear what he was saying to you but it must’ve been good because there a smile plastered on your face and a small smirk on his.

“Guess who just got himself a date.” He says throwing the piece of paper with your number down on the table.

It was going good. Really good. He hated to admit but being with you was enjoyable so the moment he found out you liked him, he asked you on a proper date. Not just going to some arcade or cafe. And he was going to until you showed up at lunch after Issei so cockily bragged the night before about how he had won and Makki better pay up.

“Do you guys mind if I eat with you?” The four of them looked up at you, confusion written all over their faces.

“Uh, why?” Makki asked you, looking at you like you were insane.

“I just wanted to spend more time with Issei.” You teeth tugged your bottom lip, anxiety creeping up your neck. Why were they looking at you like that?

“Oh, babe. You misunderstood.” Oikawa gave you a small smirk, on the verge of laughing. “We were just playing a little joke. Harmless prank.” Iwaizumi held back the urge to smack him, fully expecting you to break down in tears and scream at them for being terrible people.

But when you just laughed in their faces and walked off, it shocked them to say the least. Because, what the hell, that’s not what they were expecting but at least there wasn’t any scene. They shrugged it off and went back to eating.

The next day, Issei was expecting you to be in your normal spot glaring at him and his friends but you were no where to be found. He wasn’t concerned, the other didn’t even seem to notice. You were probably just trying to recover from the embarrassment right? Sure.

Until a week passed and there was still no sight of you. That’s when the other boys started to notice. Makki having been in a class with you, saw you weren’t showing up and none of the teachers even called your name out in class. It was weird but they wouldn’t show that, no they have a reputation to keep up.

“Be quick, dude I’m starving!” Makki groaned out rubbing his belly. Issei only rolled his eyes and walked into the convient store. He was strolling along the aisles looking for something to snack on. There was a girl in the aisle, nothing unordinary, but why did she look so familiar?

“Y/n?” He felt his heart dropped when you turned around a furrow in your eyebrows. You stood in front of him wearing a maroon skirt and white blazer, what the fuck?

You didn’t say anything, didn’t smile at him, didn’t glare at him or yell at him. You just looked at him. “Hey, I, uh, just wanted to apologize for the whole prank thing. It was fucked up and I actually really enjoyed being with you-“

There it was again, another laugh and shake of your head before you walked away. It was unsettling the way you reacted to him, he almost wished you would break down and cry so at least he knew how to feel but you just laughed at him like you didn’t care. Maybe, you didn’t.

“Fucking finally, dude. What took so long?” Issei just rolled his eyes throwing the bag of chips at Makki.

That night, he couldn’t sleep. Why weren’t you mad at him? Why didn’t you throw a fit when Oikawa told you, you were being pranked by the guy you liked? It made his chest ache, thinking of the look on your face- why didn’t you care?

It went on for a whole week, tossing and turning in his bed every night thinking of you. Why was he even thinking of you?? He hated it. Hated the way you swirled in his brain when he tried and failed to sleep each night, hated that you didn’t accept his apology, hated himself.

It was late at night when you heard the frantic knocking at your door. Maybe you shouldn’t have opened the door in case it was intruder but it was late and you weren’t thinking straight having been awoken from your sleep. You didn’t think about it until you were staring at a tired looking Issei.

He looked like shit. Face sunken, eyes dropping with heavy bags placed under them. You just rolled your eyes before attempting to close the door. Why couldn’t he just leave you alone? It was heard enough not to break down the day he embarrassed you or the day he saw you at the store.

He saw you reach to move the door closed and quickly wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his chest. For the first time in two weeks, he finally felt tired, finally felt his heart rate slow down even as you squirmed in his hold. “Please, stop moving.” He mumbled into your hair. When you stopped he finally felt himself falling asleep, because you wrapped your arms around him.

[haderpjs]

Eddie lives.

But Richie at the beginning isn’t allowed to see him, (no one is, obviously, he’s under surgery) the losers try to take him to the Town House so he can sleep and change his filthy clothes, they try, more than once each, until Richie finally agrees.

Eddie had more than one surgery, Richie wasn’t paying so much attention to what the doctors were saying to them. All the things they had to do to save Eddie's life sounded numb and far away because he was occupied thinking on how he might be so close to losing Eddie a g a i n, after just having got him back.

Now clean and rested (not really he couldn’t sleep more than two hours because he made the mistake of entering to Eddie’s room and see the blood all over the bathroom floor) he is finally allowed to see Eddie, it’s been almost 10 hours since they first brought Eddie to the hospital. It hurts to see his dearest friend all pale and weak and tied to diverse devices and machines but it’s a million times better than what he saw in the deadlights.

They stay all the hours the doctors allow them to, when the night comes he’s the only one who doesn’t go back to the Town House. He stays besides Eddie because he is afraid of leaving his friend alone, he is afraid of Edie dying even when the doctors said he was in no danger anymore, he can’t leave Eddie, he can’t lose him after he just got him back, -you don’t ‘got him’ don’t be stupid, he is married and you know it- he tells himself.

Richie sits on the chair besides Eddie’s bed, since the bed is taller he can rest his head on the mattress. He knows he should put his glasses on the table but he finds himself being comfortably at peace por once since he arrived to Derry and he might not want to fall asleep but he is so tired, without realizing or thinking much about it his body is already reaching out for Eddie’s, Richie holds his friend’s hand and lets the [beep beep beep] of the heart rate monitor drift him to sleep, -it’s practically the sound of Eddie’s heart- he tinks and sure it isn’t the most comfortable position but he won’t let go of Eddie’s hand.

He wakes up in the middle of the night all startled and alarmed, he adjusts his crooked glasses and once his eyes adjust to the darkness of the room and then he can see how the dim glow from outside lightens Eddie’s facial features, Richie feels like crying for the nth time since he woke up from the deadlights. And jus now he had dreamed what he saw in those fucking magic demonic lights.

‘‘Hey Eds, you ...  you have to wake up man’‘ his voice is barely a whisper

[beep beep beep]

‘‘Not like, right now I know you’re on a lot of drugs and very weak from the surgeries but-huh’‘ he whimpers and tries to calm himself

-Of couse Eddie will wake up, we killed that fucking demonic clown, we won, and we remember each other and we’ll not forget this time!-

‘‘y’know you’re the strongest person I know right?, and you’re so brave Eds, I hope you know I meant what I said down there in the sewers, you are braver than you believe you are’‘

-Eddie will wake up and I’ll tell him how brave he is to his face until he believes it-

‘‘But you’re an Idiot too’‘ he can’t contain the little giggle that escapes his mouth

‘‘Why did you save me?’‘ he asks to the unconscious man lying in fron of him

[beep beep beep]

-It should’ve been me- that thought is been in Richie’s head since they were draggind Eddie outside from neitbolt.

He was the one with the stupid trashmouth that got himself in the deadlights and he probably should have died with his brains fried or whatever. It sucked that Eddie had to rescue him only to nearly die impaled. If Richie just hadn’t acted stupidily. But he knows Eddie did it because they are best friends, the same way Eddie would have done it for Bill or any other of the losers, Richie also knows he would have done the same thing, bitch he did what he did because Mike was about to die and even if it wasn’t the most smart thing to do he’d do that again just so Mike or any other of his friends wouldn't die.

[beep beep beep]

‘‘Why did that fucking clown had to hurt you?’‘ He lets out a sob and burries his head on the space between Eddie’s arm and the right side of his torso

-to hurt me, It did it because he knew my secret, always knew and It did it in front of my eyes, because he knew my dirty little secret because It knew one of my biggest fears is losing you-

Sure the moment pennywise died Eddie’s bleeding had stopped and when they put Eddie in the ambulance Richie is sure the hole in his chest wasn't as big as pennywise claw must’ve first pierced through Eddie’s chest, but Eddie still lost plenty blood and the internal damage still was there. He wishes Eddie’s injury had dissapeared the moment they killed that demonic clown.

‘‘I know you’re out of danger now but you didn’t deserve this, you didn’t have to, for ANY reason, especially not for me’‘

[beep beep beep]

He hated himself for being the cause Eddie was now lying almost lifeless on a hospital bed, with a big-ass scar on his chest and back, not to mention who knows how many months of physical therapy ahead of him.

‘‘Eds, I am so happy you’re alive, umm I thought-’’ he whimpers

‘’I thought I had lost you, when we were dragging you out and you wouldnt wake up, I held your almost lifeless body on my arms and it felt fucking horrible’‘ a deep breath escapes his mouth

[beep beep beep]

‘‘it felt like my life was being drawn away from me’‘ he lifts his hands and presses his palms under his glasses against his eyelids

[beep beep beep]

The only sound in the room was Richie’s pained voice and the constant [beep beep beep] of the machine, not that he was expecting Eddie to wake up and reply, but he was so used to Eddie always replying to him, most of the times some annoyed comebacks because of Richie’s jokes about Mrs. K, sometimes just Eddie’s giggles at Richie’s most stupid jokes, and the good ones too.

‘‘Because since the moment I remembered you, I felt like the most alive person on earth’‘

[beep beep beep]

‘‘I didn't know I missed you so much until I saw you’‘

[beep beep beep]

‘‘The void in my heart took your form after my brain reclaimed your name’

[beep beep beep] ‘

‘‘I want you in my life forever’‘ -and the rest of the losers of course-

[beep beep beep]

‘‘i don’t think I can make it another 27 years without your- friendship being a constan in my life’‘

[beep beep beep] 

Richie thinks about confessing his feeling to Eddie, since well... Eddie wasn’t really listening and also, he wasn’t sure if he’d ever had the guts to do it when Eddie was actually listening, and if he ever dared to tell him how he felt, well... Eddie was married anyway and he had a life in NY, Richie would have to conform with Eddie’s friendship.

Eventually Richie fell asleep again, he didn’t dreamed about Eddie’s death this time, he dreamed they were fifteen again and they were on the hammock reading comics and annoying the shit out of each other. Until an ugly whiny voice woke him up.

‘‘[I AM HIS WIFE and I have all the right to see him!]’‘

Richie could see the shadow on the closed curtains of the window that a nurse was standing between the door and a woman, blocking her way in.

‘‘[Mrs. Kaspbrak I understand you are concerned about your husband but I already told you he is stable and these are not visit hours]’‘

-SHITSHITSHITSHIT EDDIE’S WIFE IS HERE-

Richie stood up from the chair and started pacing the room, he had stayed past visit hours and he wasn't supposed to, but since the nurse that came last night into the room to check Eddie’s vitals didn’t say a word he supposed it wouldn’t be a problem if he slept there.

Now he had no way of sneaking out of the room and they were going to find him in there and honestly, he didn’t care if the doctors disapproved his actions, he didn't want to see Eddie’s wife, but he didn’t want to leave Eddie’s side just so Mrs. Kaspbrak would take his place

-It is NOT your place! stop it!!!-

‘‘FFFFUCK’‘ he muttered

‘‘[... else do you need me to sign?, I am going to demand this hospital if you refuse to let me see my husband]’‘

‘’fuck Eds she really is Sonia 2.0, Jesus man what did you got yourself into?’‘ Richie whispered towards Eddie

‘‘[... and sorry I don’t mean to be rude, I am just very *hiccups* very worried abut my husband and i just need to see him, I haven't seen him since he left three days ago, pleease even if it’s just 5 minutes I need to see him!, you can’t imagine the pain I was in when i found out he!- *wimpers*]’‘

Richie reaches out for Eddie’s hand and sqeezes it, Eddie looks so peaceful now and he really can't hold himself out, he leans down and pressed a kiss to Eddie's forehead.

He was just leaning back up when the door opened

‘‘You can stay but when the Doctor comes in for the routinely check-ups you'll have to leave, that gives you about 20 minutes-’‘ the nurse stopps when she sees Richie standing beside Eddie’s bed.

‘‘Oh!, I didn't thought-’‘ anyone would be here

‘‘No i was just le-’‘ Richie doesn’t finish because Myra interrupts him, walking towards Eddie’s bed while observing Richie’s being very meticulously

‘’WHO ARE YOU?’’ Myra demands looking at Richie now with a flash of disgust on her face

Richie doen’t like how demanding she sounds, and he certainly doesnt like how she’s looking at him, he feels vulnerable and he feels exposed like he just got caught doing something that he isn't supposed to, allowed to. He hates it.

‘’No one, I am leaving’‘ He answers almost very apathetic and walks down past them towards the door. Hands on his pockets and head slightly facing down

‘‘are you one of Eddie’s friends?. He said he came to visit some friends, were you with him when this happened to him?’‘

He stops in the door frame but doesn't turn to face her

‘‘Yeah’‘... -yes I was there and I didn’t do enough to keep him from being hurt, yes it’s my fault he’s there ... -

Richie leaves the room.

[ofstarsandfireflies]

@hello-strangelove helped me a bunch with this one! Love ya boo!

Just Go With It-

A desperate doctor recruits his assistant to be his wingwoman and fake ex-wife for love.

Stephen didn’t believe in love.

Not after he’d experienced it and lost it to...how many people had his fiancé slept with?

A number he knew when he was sober anyway.

Money.

That’s all it came down to.

That’s why she’d been with him.

Why she wanted to marry him.

And he’d been blind to it.

He fiddled with the ring on his finger.

He should get rid of it, toss it in the ocean.

But as he stands up to do this, he bumps into a fairly attractive woman, causing her to spill her drink.

And as she accuses him of attempting to hit on her, she notices his ring.

Then she’s apologising and asking about his wife.

Stephen, a little taken back and not thinking clearly, made up a fake wife who was a lying, cheating monster, even creating fake kids that he stays in the marriage for.

There was no satisfaction when he earns the woman's pity, but when she took him home with her to show him how he should he treated, Stephen realised he could get any woman in bed with him, just as long as he had his wedding ring.

So he began wearing the ring everywhere he went and, if he saw someone he thought looked decent enough, he’d lie and lie and lie until he was lying in their bed.

Then he’d move on to someone new.

He could get used to this kind of life:

No strings attached, a different warm body any night.

Plus he was rich, he could do whatever he wanted to whomever he wanted.

It didn’t matter about the shame and self-hatred he felt afterwards. Or how they were using him just as much as he was them.

It didn’t matter that he wanted to stay with half of them, the fear of them rejecting him or cheating on him again keeping him alone and isolated.

And one night, after slipping from whatever-her-face’s house after way too much alcohol, Stephen loses control of his car and with it, his hands and career.

It would take years of study to become the Sorcerer Supreme he is now, having to let go of his old life.

But the one thing he couldn't let go of was the ring.

Stephen had formed an alliance with the Avengers, offering his services both mystical and medical and was soon considered part of the team.

Tony even allows him to have the medical wing as long as he gets to be Stephen's assistant.

He has three doctorates after all, though he never goes into any details as to what field they were in.

He’d never do this for anyone else, but it’s different with Tony.

Stephen and Tony are very familiar.

Stephen was there when Tony needed help getting custody of his two kids Peter and Harley, both of whom Stephen adores, and Tony was there every morning with his favourite cup of tea and asking him about who he lied to this time when he sees Stephen walk in with a hang over.

They’re best friends, each happy with their single lives.

That is until one particular night at a high class gala in the honour of the Avengers.

Here is where Stephen encounters Christine.

Christine was beautiful and intelligent and funny and everything Stephen had ever wanted in a life long partner.

So, thinking he might have a chance without the ring, he pockets it for the first time since he started wearing it.

They talk, they laugh, they can be themselves around each other, but after spending the night on the beach with her, she discovers the ring, which had slipped out of his pocket.

And she is pissed.

And while Stephen is desperately trying to explain, which he doesn’t exactly know how to do without sounding like a playboy, he loses her.

Stephen tries to go to Tony for help with this situation, being a former playboy himself.

Tony just rubs it in his face that he never used a wedding ring to get dates, that he didn’t have to, and that he told Stephen that that ring would come back to bite him on the ass one day, but when he sees how distressed Stephen is, he comes up with a brilliant plan.

Stephen should just say he’s divorced! Problem solved!

But when Stephen tries this on Christine. she wants to meet his ex wife.

And when she asks for her name, all Stephen can say is Tony Stark.

Christine is not amused.

Tony Stark?

Stephen Strange has been married to Tony Stark?

All Stephen can do is nod, hoping she believes him.

She doesn’t.

Thinking Stephen is just a liar, Christine tells him to bring Tony Stark to lunch so she can hear it from him.

So Tony, wanting to make the best impression, dresses up in his most expensive suit, arrives as the Iron Man so there can be no doubt that it’s not just a look alike, and walks in like he owns the place.

And Stephen almost falls out of his chair.

Tony always dressed nice at the tower, but this was something different.

He showed up in moderate attractiveness, in raw beauty, accustomed to Stephen's tastes, wearing a tie that matches Stephen’s eyes.

Stephen’s always loved that tie.

Tony is hitting on everyone and dragging Stephen’s name through the mud and Stephen is trying to tell Tony he’s had too much to drink this early in the day until things get taken a bit too far and he tries kicking him under the table, missing Tony completely and kicking Christine instead.

Having to cover that blunder up, Tony says he has leg spasms and kicks Stephen.

This is Stephen’s punishment for making him go through with all this.

Christine can’t believe she’s talking to Tony Stark and it’s going well until he gets a phone call from his kids, which Christine over hears.

So, naturally, she wants to meet them when both men have to confirm the kids are from their marriage.

The next day Stephen immediately sets to work on recruiting Peter and Harley to be his fake children.

Tony doesnt like the fact that Stephen is bringing his kids into this sick spiraling plan of his now, but when he hears that Harley actually smiled and Peter finally ate something, he decides it can’t hurt if he lets them in on this if it’s going to benefit them.

And, as a family this time, they all meet up with Christine again.

The kids are weirdos, as to be expected, and Christine is getting along fine with them until Harley starts crying about his mother breaking her promise to spend time with him and teach him how to swim in Hawaii.

After a very confusing conversation trying to solve that little slip up, and getting a very stern look from Christine while Peter tries to comfort his brother, Stephen has no choice but to take everyone to Hawaii because Harley couldn’t play pretend for a couple of hours.

Upon arriving in Hawaii and booking a couple of suites, Stephen intends to spend as much time alone with Christine as possible, but things never ever go his way.

As they all have dinner and the lies pile up over and over one another, Tony can’t take it anymore.

He can’t keep lying to this woman just so Stephen can have a relationship with her. Stephen seems serious about it but Tony’s had experiences with relationships built on lies and they never last.

As he’s trying to leave and Stephen is trying to make him stay, Tony hears his name being called out by the last person he expected to see here.

Rhodey, an old frenemy from his MIT days, is here with his wife Carol.

And Tony can’t bear the thought of Rhodey knowing about his life as a divorced single father of two while he’s still happily married.

So, dragging Stephen over with him, Tony instantly starts laying down lies of his own, threatening Stephen that if he doesn’t play along, he’ll take the kids and leave.

Stephen has no choice and talks up their fake marriage, the complete opposite of what he’d been doing this entire time.

Tony brags about Stephen, adoring him and preening over his success as a doctor and sorcerer, making Stephen feel incredibly exclusive, and making his face embarrassingly red.

And when they parted arm in arm, they both couldn’t help but feel a little lighter.

The next day, as Christine takes Tony out so Stephen can spend some time with his kids, he finally gets around to teaching Harley how to swim, Tony coming in just as Harley decides to tackle the pool by himself, he and Christine joining in the cheering to encourage his son to the end.

Harley makes it and they all erupt into applause, Christine rather taken with Stephen just as Tony is too.

No one has ever done anything like this for his kids before.

It’s as Peter and Harley are getting out of the pool, Tony runs into Rhodey again, who wants to know who Christine is.

And becoming confused when she says she’s the girlfriend.

Peter manages to shut her up by pushing her in the pool and Harley tries to distract her until Tony can get rid of Rhodey.

Panicking, Tony accidentally accepts an invitation to a double date dinner, and he knows he needs Stephen’s help with it.

After their evening at the pool, Christine offers Stephen a night to themselves, finally, and Stephen is excited to have proper time alone with her.

However, that same evening, Tony calls from his room and pleads with him to be his date that night for Rhodey and Carol.

Stephen immediately tries to refuse, all he’s done is spend time with Tony and the kids, he deserves some time alone with Christine.

But Tony, frantic to prove himself to Rhodey, and making sure to remind him of everything he had already done so why can’t Stephen just do this ONE thing for him, Stephen agrees to go on the date.

Stephen tells Christine that they'd have to postpone their alone night because Peter and Harley wanted to spend the night with her, and she understands.

So they go to the dinner full of passive aggression, trying to hold back their laughter while watching Rhodey and Carol be so affectionate and sappy with one another.

At some point, Rhodey mentions how he and Carol recite what they love about the other every time they separate.

And he wants to see Tony and Stephen try it, right there at the table.

Not wanting to chicken out in front of Rhodey, Tony turns to Stephen with clear intent, clearing his throat and licking his lips as Stephen waits for him to start, smiling.

Tony proceeds to list off to Stephen how he loves his perseverance, his humor, his sarcasm, and how he gave Tony a solid match in wit.

He loves Stephen's mind and talent, and especially his heart, which he couldn’t hide from him and how much he really cared, even when he tried to pretend he didn’t.

Stephen's hands tremble.

He feels sick, but not in a terrible way. All he could focus on was Tony.

Tony, sitting facing him with those clear brown eyes, open and honest.

Tony, with an almost vulnerable expression on his face as if he were waiting for Stephen’s acceptance of something.

Tony, wearing that tie he loves, who deserved to be appreciated so much more than the this one night Stephen can give him.

Taking a deep breath, Stephen recites everything he loves about Tony.

How much he loved his intelligence, his generosity, and thoughtfulness. He loved Tony's willingness to listen and how he made Stephen feel better than he was.

He loves Tony's support and even his snark.

And his smile.

God, that smile, the one Tony had this very moment, the one that makes Stephen’s heart skip a beat, was the only thing he looked forward to everyday they got to spend together.

Tony can only gaze back into Stephen's ocean eyes, absolutely starstruck and dumbfounded.

It was a moment. A beautiful, glorious moment.

A moment that was interrupted by Rhodey with the dessert that had just arrived.

Dinner continued perfectly.

Tony stopped caring about what Rhodey thought, instead giggling over glasses of wine and bites of cake with Stephen.

Afterwards they returned to the hotel, laughing and talking about the night, stopping outside Tony’s suite to stifle their laughter and calm down.

And while they do, all they can do is stare at each other.

Then staring turned into leaning in.

Tony’s eyes fluttered closed and Stephen’s hand moved up to his shoulder to hold him.

Then they were jumping apart as Tony's door flung open to reveal Peter and Harley, who'd been waiting for him to come back.

Christine was waiting in the room, perking up when she saw Stephen.

She attached herself to him immediately, excitedly telling the two how while she had been watching over Peter and Harley, they confessed to her that Stephen had talked about marrying Christine and had even shown her the ring he’d bought her.

And Christine wanted to marry Stephen immediately.

Stephen's stomach churned with anxiety, yet he reluctantly agreed as he watched Tony's face fall.

While Christine was making reservations that night, Stephen couldn’t sleep.

He was going to get married, but now he wasn’t at all certain he was marrying the right person.

He called Tony and asked him if marrying Christine was the right thing to do, secretly hoping that Tony would tell him it wasn’t.

Hoping for some hope that Tony would want him instead.

Tony doesn’t. Instead he tells him that he’s planning to expand the Avengers tower, so he would be managing a separate section of it.

Tony would have to leave the medical wing, and in the process, leave Stephen.

Stephen couldn’t sleep for the rest of the night.

The next day, while Stephen and Christine were getting married, Tony sat alone at the island bar, drinking away his despair.

He’d thought about running in shouting his objection, but he didn’t want to ruin Stephen’s happiness.

He’d chosen her.

He’d gone through this whole elaborate scheme just to be with her.

Tony couldn’t stand in the way of that. Of all his hard work.

He wasn't alone for long however when Stephen suddenly appeared next to him.

To say Tony was shocked and confused was an understatement.

He tried asking about the wedding, thinking it was over already, and Stephen told him.

He told him he had been standing there, looking at Christine walking toward him, ready to start their lives together, and all he could think about was how she wasn’t Tony.

What he had wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted a chance with Tony and his kids.

He wanted to be a part of his family and to keep working together.

Tony's heart was hammering in his chest as Stephen closed the distance between them, and then absolutely melted as Stephen kissed him.

And soon, Stephen finally got to wear a wedding ring, for real this time, with Tony’s matching.

One he would use to show off to anyone around him, that he was taken.

Quotes-

“I told you that this whole fake marriage thing was just gonna come and bite you in the ass. Why don’t you just tell her the truth?”

Tony taking the piss out of Stephen.

“And I love that you secretly have a huge heart, and it’s just filled with kindness and humility...”

Tony trying not to let his feelings show and failing.

"You know what I love? How you just do everything for everybody else and you never expect anything back. In fact, when I say thank you, I don’t know, do you hear that or not? It’s cute. And I love...I just love...You’re the only person I’ve never lied to in my life. I swear to God. I just trust you more than anybody in the world. You know every secret about me. I love your smile. That smile is the magic.”

Stephen telling Tony what he loves about him and realising he’s actually in love with him.

"You are the only real thing I've ever had in my life."

"Oh, Danny, come on, man. I don’t...she's beautiful and she's...I’m not 23...I'm not that."

"She's good, she's very nice. There's only one problem; she's not you...She's not you."

"I have two kids. I can't just drive them off a cliff, you know?"

"I love those kids more than anything in the world, Guv’nor."

Stephen reassuring Tony that he's the one he wants to be with.

Fling Ring -

Stephen asks Tony to pose as his ex husband when trying to lie his way into a woman’s heart.

Missed a Day? Catch up here!

Day 1 Day 2 Day 3 Day 4 Day 5

Day 6 Day 7 Day 8 Day 9 Day 10

Day 11 Day 12 Day 13 Day 14 Day 15

Day 16 Day 17 Day 18 Day 19 Day 20

Day 21 Day 22

[randomsevans]

PAIN OF BEING IN LOVE

Part 2

Chris Evan's x Reader

@jtargaryen18 30 days of chris 2020

summary: following the news of Chris's engagement you find your way back down memory lane . To the finding and first crack in your love for Chris that would only lead to the current pain you are in

The part couple of hours have been a blur ever since Lisa had announced that Chris was getting married to his actress girl friend ,Minka . You feel like your mind was somewhere as your body floated around not releasing what was going on , feeling numb . You dont know how or when but you laid on your bed under the covers in the pitch black . Finally letting the tears fall . You knew this day would come , but it doesnt stop the pain , the constant stabbing in your chest . You always knew loving Chris was bad for you , but you did it anyway, you still do . And you know deep down no matter what the future holds for you or who you have in your life you will love Chris . And you will always love the joy and pain he brings into your life , without anyone knowing, well apart from Scott now . And you know no one , ever , future ,past , present will have the same effect on you as those blue eyes do . You will always love chris , different love no one could ever be able to beat or match or even go higher But you kept it a secret long enough and it will always be . It's not like you expect somewhere down the line you two might end up together, that was never gonna happen . His to good for you , and his sees you as a sister . An Minka is perfect for him in every way . You are happy for him truly getting the life he has always wanted . But that doesnt stop the pain. You cant help but remember to the day you realised you love him and how he could never be yours , you never would allow it .

+++++++++++++++

Flashback

'The dickhead , errrrrrr knew it was too good to be true , I bet his getting a proper kick out of it ' 14 year old you was standing outside the cinema. The movie you were ment to be seeing playing, probably half way through now . Your date never turned put and to be honest your not that disappointed, he seem like an asshole anyway . Your just annoyed he probably thinks it's fun and thinks your crying. (You wouldnt allow your self to cry over something so pathetic in your eyes ) But you can't help on single tear roll down your cheek , this was ment to be your first date . You didnt want to go , you wasnt interested, but Scott kept pushing you to give it a shot. At least one lesson was learnt , dont listen to Scott but it's a lesson you already knew all to well .

To make things worst Scott wasnt picking up his phone . Probably to busy was something stuiped as always . Once you called him the 10th time you started to become stressed . How was you gonna get home ? You felt more teare escape due to the stress .

Scrolling though your contacts you came across Chris . You held your thumb over the name of awhile debating whether to call him or not . He was Scott's older brother ,you didnt want to make a fool of your self and seem like a little girl who cant look after her self but at the same time he said he you ever needed him he was one phone call away .

So that's what you did . With your phone now up to your ear you waited to see if he would answer. 'Hes probably busy with his new girlfriend '

But to your surprise he answered

"Hello "

"Hi " your voice cracked and tears began to run down your cheek at the sound of his voice.

"Y/n are you okay ?" You could hear the panic in his voice , you just let out a loud hiccup as your tried not to cry "... tell me where you are I'll come and get you "

"But ... a... arnt you .u busy ?"

"I'm never to busy for you . Now where are you ?" He demand as you heard on the phone and loud slam you could only assume a door and a seconde later you heard his car engine.

"Umm Chris it's fine, I should of called "

"Sweetheart tell me where you are ,or I swear I'll look on every street in Boston. "

"Umm but "

"Y/n " he warned

"I'm at the cinema 15 minutes away from your and Scott's "

"Okay I'll be there in 5 " he ended the call .

How can he be here in 5 , its 15 minutes away . Unless he is going to speed . He better not. Maybe he already knew where I was . Oh who iam kidding his nee girlfriend probably leaves 5 minutes away .

And with that you waited ,not much else you could do . Your tears died down . Still feel stuipid of crying over something or someone or somewhere you didnt even want to be

As if in a blink of an eye a battered dirt coloured trunk pulled up in front of you . The windows rolled down to show a very conserndier Chris showing lines on his youthful face as he frownd . "Get in " he muttered by in a tone that was not to be argued with . So you step forward hesitant at first but then you remember you did call him . As as you open the car door and I one footed jump into the truck , shuting the door behind you placing your bag in front of you , inbetween your feet as you fiddled with the seat belt .

"So ... " he began " why are stranded at the cinema "

"I was... um "

' Why am so nervous '

"I was ment to be on a date ..." it was then you final met Chris eyes that showed a flash if emotion as if he was almost hurt at the thought of you on a date . But it was probably because you interrupted his own . But you still felt a need to explain as if to avoid hurting his feelings.

"He ..he stood me up.. its not like I even wanted to go it was all Scots idea ." To quickly finished quite nervous as if you did something wronge .

Chris raised an eyebrow "Scotts ha ?" You nodded

"I tried calling him but he didnt pick up "

"So you called me ?" You nodded " so why was you crying if you didnt even want to be on the date ?"

"I was not!" You never like showing your emotions it made you feel weak and you are anything but weak .

"I heard you on the pho..." he chucked trying to lighten the mood

"I was just stress I didn't know how I was gonna get home "

"Well iam here now "

"So can you take me home ?" You questioned

"No !" You were shocked by his sudden answer.

"What ?"

"I'm not taking you home, not yet anyway " he said with his sights smirk .

"So where ?"

"Surprise!" He said starting the engine

"But ... but dont you have to get back to your girlfriend?"

"Pfff girlfriend?" He looked confused.

"Yeah Scott said you had a girlfriend "

"You shouldn't listen to Scott "

"I know that " you giggled now looking out the widow watching the world pass away. Unaware of certain blue eyes keep glancing at you with a smile only for you .

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

" you didn't have to do this you know " said while manching on your fries in a dinner Chris brought you to .

" I did !" He agreed with a mouth full of his burger ." I couldn't make you go home with a frown " he said with his mouth. You blush at his words but disgusted by his manners .

Throughing a scrunched up napkin you giggled playfully " dont speak you your mouth full "

He raised an eyebrow and smirked a little sorry .

"Why do you care anyway , why do this just to make me smile " you giggled certainly in a better mood , his blue eyes stared into your in awe and a quite mutter you just about heard " if only you knew " but you swear you heard him wrong some you moved on to your next question . As those also familiar butterflys return to your stomach when ever your around Chris .

" So is that your job to make me smile " you ask while putting another frie or two in your mouth .

"Among other thing "

"Like ..?" Your curiosity getting the better of you .

" Give me the punks name ? " he glared at you but still in a soft manner as if to tell you his anger wasnt towards you

" what ?"

" the idiot who stood you up I want his name " he demanded as if a man on a misson .

"Why? "

"Because he made a mistake standing you up "

"And whys that ?"

Because he stood up the best girl in Boston, I know I wouldnt if I was him" the last part came out a bit shaky and quite .

"It doesn't matter anyway " you felt the butterflies raise to your chest as your heart began to faster .

"Because it does "

You couldn't argue anymore , abit scared by his tone you gave him the boys name . But you were still under the spell of his blue eyes . And it was at that moment everything your mother said as a child when you ask about love , princess and prince, clicked in your head . She expain how the flurry feeling never goes away as their around, how theirs a smile on your face always. And how their a feeling. A feeling only there can make you feel . It was at this moment you realised

Holy shit I'm in love with Chris

As you stared at those blue eyes surrounding a 17 year old Chris you knew you always had a little crush on him . You were pretty sure half of the girls in school did . But it never accrued to you just how far those feelings ran .

"Why do you care ?" You titled your head .

"Because your Scotte best friend " he smirked with yet another mout h full of his burger. You giggled at his terrible manners .knowing full well he was doing it because he knew it annoyed you .

And it was in this moment you knew

'He will never be your y/n and keep it that way to keep both Scott and Chris in your life '

You put on a small smile , as the first crack appeared on you new found love for Chris that will forever be on you heart . If only you knew it would be the first of many. Leading to the one big hole you feel currently. But that's the pain of being in love

[artificialqueens]

Stupid For You, Chapter 7 (Crygi, Jankie, Jaida x Nicky) - Metaluna

Fic summary: A cliche lesbian AU. It’s the summer before Gigi goes to college, and she decides it’s time to take a job at a local amusement park. There, she meets Crystal, a beautiful girl that she with bonds over the anxiety of the service industry. Almost immediately, Gigi gets it BAD for Crystal. Meanwhile, Jackie definitely ISN’T gay. She likes men. Only. Men. What happens when a beautiful girl named Jan comes into the picture? And lastly, Nicky flirts with anything with a pulse. Jaida falls for anyone who gives her attention. This is going to be one interesting summer

Chapter summary: If anyone knows how to party, it’s the staff of Paradise Isle. When Brita turns 21, she’s determined to have the biggest party Paradise Isle has ever seen.

A/N: Hi everyone! I officially outlined the rest of the fic so it’s going to be 10 chapters total, three more to go!!

By the time Gigi made it down the exit ramp, all she wanted to do was leave. She heard Jan behind her, but kept moving forward. Her heart beat was pounding in her ears and she began to feel warm tears form in her eyes.

“Gigi, wait!” Jan called.

Gigi didn’t listen and instead kept walking. Jan managed to chase her all the way into The Landing until Gigi stopped dead in her tracks, rested her face in her hands and started crying. Wordlessly, Jan went up to her and wrapped her in a gentle embrace. Once Gigi broke away, Jan led them to a bench, and stayed quiet. She knew Gigi was about to explode at any second.

And she was right.

“How could she do that? What the hell? If she didn’t want to see me, she could have just fucking said something! I have no idea what the hell I did to her and why she’s acting the way she is, but I guess fuck my feelings! Right? Just fuck them!” Gigi threw her hands up in frustration before crying into Jan’s shoulder.

“Shh, it’s okay,” Jan cooed rubbing Gigi’s hair. She knew Gigi’s mascara was staining her shirt, but it was something she could worry about later.

“How could she?” Gigi’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“I don’t know, baby. There’s no way to know what’s running through her bizarre little head.”

Gigi wiped her eyes, trying to salvage what was left of her makeup. “I’m overreacting.”

“No, you aren’t. You need to feel whatever it is that you’re feeling. Your feelings are valid and you’re entitled to them,” Jan said firmly.

“I want to hate her.”

“Why?”

Gigi sighed. “I want to hate her, because that means I wouldn’t be in love with her anymore.”

“Wow,” Jan began. “I didn’t realize you were in that deep.”

“Jan, it’s bad.”

“Sounds like it.”

“If I could just hate her, I could be done and move on. I hate that when I see her pictures on Instagram with her shitty boyfriend, all I can do is think about how I wish it was me. I hate that she’s the first thing I think about when I wake up, and the last thing I think about when I go to bed. I just want to hate her.”

“Do you honestly believe do any good?” Jan questioned.

Gigi mulled it over and sighed. “No. What am I going to do?”

“I wish I knew what to tell you, Gigi, but I don’t. But, we can figure out what we’re doing tonight. Do you want to leave, or do you want to keep hanging out with everyone? After the look I gave her and what I said to her, I don’t think she’ll come anywhere near you anytime.”

Gigi looked stunned. “Jan what the hell did you tell her?”

“Don’t worry about it.” Jan winked.

“I’m not going to let her ruin my night.” Gigi’s tone was determined. “Let’s go.”

–

Nicky and Jaida were awkwardly left behind in the queue. Since they were next, they ended up going on the roller coaster. Jaida had to admit, a roller coaster was a lot less fun when one of your friends was experiencing emotional trauma, even if you were in the front.

“Should we go find them?” Nicky asked as she grabbed her purse.

Jaida thought for a moment and said, “Honestly? I don’t want to make it worse. Gigi trusts Jan and I want Gigi to talk through all the emotional shit she’s feeling.”

“Good point.”

Jaida and Nicky made their way through The Backlands. Jaida knew that she had feelings for Nicky that Nicky didn’t share. Jaida also knew that every time they slept together, she felt herself falling a little harder. As much as Jaida didn’t want to break her own heart for her final summer at the park, she swore something felt different about Nicky.

As they walked, Jaida swung her hand forward making contact with Nicky’s to test her response.

“Sorry,” Nicky mumbled putting her hand closer to her side.

The response is not the one Jaida was looking for, which caused her to sigh.

Nicky slowed her pace. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Jaida forced a smile. “Just tired.”

“Gotcha.”

Jaida wondered how dense Nicky could be. Even though Jaida couldn’t be mad that Nicky didn’t return her feelings, it still frustrated her. While Jaida knew it was a horrible idea to keep going with their fling, she liked Nicky so much that she’d rather have her physically than not at all.

 Or did she?

This wasn’t healthy for her mental state. Jaida had enough on her plate already. Between writing essay after essay for law schools throughout the country as well as working six days a week, Jaida was nearing her limit. As much as she tried to tell herself that her fling with Nicky helped her decompress, she knew that wasn’t the case. It made everything much, much worse. Before she could think on it further, she was interrupted by her phone vibrating with a text from Jan.

so I honestly cant tell if gigi’s more hurt or pissed at crystal and honestly it really doesnt matter but she did say she wants to keep the night to keep going so I say let’s do it! we’re at the landing rn, where are you??

Quickly, Jaida reiterated to Nicky the situation, and texted back, Okay, good! We’ll meet you there.

The rest of the night was filled with memorable selfies, laughs that were mostly at the extent of Jan’s inability to ride roller coasters, and by the end of the night, Gigi felt great, and was determined to not let one person ruin what was already an incredible summer.  

Following National Roller Coaster Day, Jaida, Nicky, Jan, and Gigi bonded even further, and became inseparable. Through hanging out with Jan, Gigi also developed a very close bond with Jackie. Gigi never had a group of friends before, and was thankful she had such an amazing group of friends.

Gigi formed such a close bond with her friends that she all but forgot about Crystal. At times, they ran into each other in the break room, and every time, they didn’t so much as look at each other. While the environment was tense, there was never any negativity. No one was outwardly mean to each other. In fact, everyone but Gigi maintained being friendly with Crystal. Gigi couldn’t allow this to upset her, since they were all adults and could choose their friends. At times though, it did feel like a punch in the gut when Gigi was on her breaks and saw Jan stop to talk to Crystal.

One day, Gigi sat in the breakroom. As she at her lunch, Brita sat across from her.

“Hey, Brita,” Gigi greeted.

“As you know, my birthday is drawing near.”

All Brita talked about was how she was going to turn twenty one in a couple of weeks. Everyone knew it was Brita’s birthday, including people who didn’t even know Brita.

“So I’ve heard!”

“My parents are actually going to be out of town. So, I’m going to have a party. Not just any party. No, this party is going to be so big and so memorable that they’ll be talking about this like five summers from now.”

Gigi raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

Brita nodded. “I’m inviting literally everyone I know who works here…”

Gigi caught on to what Brita was saying. Even the people who weren’t well versed in what happened between Gigi and Crystal knew something was wrong. “That’s fine, Brita. I’m not going to let my relationship, or lack thereof, with someone ruin your birthday.”

“Good. It’s this Wednesday, starting at 10. That way everyone has time to get ready after work. Thank god for shortened park hours.”

The scheduling gods smiled upon Jaida, Nicky, Gigi, and Jackie. Somehow they all ended up with the same days off, one of which being Friday. It helped that Jaida always sweet talked the scheduler, and the scheduler knew who her friends were. Jaida wasn’t about using her feminine charm to get what she wanted.

The girls all agreed to get ready at Gigi’s, because she had the largest space. Getting ready with others was much more fun for Gigi than getting ready alone. Although, she had to admit it was a different feeling when she and Crystal got ready together for Heidi’s party. She forced that thought out of her head as she put on an 80’s playlist. Deciding what to wear to a party was Gigi’s favorite part of getting ready. Even if she didn’t want to admit it, she wanted this party to be the exact opposite as the previous party. Because of this, Gigi opted to wear a tight orange halter top with an blue high-waisted shorts, which was the exact opposite of her black and white outfit.

“You look like your room,” Jan teased eyeing Gigi’s room decor. 

Gigi rolled her eyes. “It’s not my fault that my two favorite colors look amazing on me.”

“Fair,” Jaida mused as she rummaged through her bag. “Shit. I forgot my eyelash glue.”

Nicky, who was sitting cross-legged on the ground blending out a smoky eye tossed hers to Jaida. “Here.”

“Thank you,” Jaida smiled sweetly expertly applying an eyelash.

Jackie looked on incredulously. “I have no idea how you do it.”

“Lots and lots of practice,” Jaida said as she batted her eyelashes in Jackie’s direction.

“Do you ever wear more than mascara and eyeliner in your waterline?” Nicky questioned, admiring her appearance in a hand mirror.

Jackie shook her head. “I just… don’t know how to do anything else. One time I tried to do wings and it looked like a drunk toddler did them. No wait, a drunk toddler would have done better.“

Jan’s face brightened. “Can I please do your makeup? Please?”

After hesitating, Jackie said, “What the hell. Why not?”

Jan squealed as she made her way over to Jackie, who was sitting in the chair at Gigi’s desk. Watching Jan do Jackie’s makeup made Gigi feel a pang of jealousy. All through high school, she’d never had the desire to date. Of course, she definitely didn’t want a boyfriend. But, she never thought about having a girlfriend either, and only knew that she liked girls. She also never had a friend group like the one she had now. She also never thought she’d have a group of friends she could trust as much as she trusted the friends she made. For once in her life, Gigi felt safe enough to come out. Other than her family, Jan was the only person who knew, and the only reason she’d told Jan in the first place was because she was about to have a mental breakdown. But, it was time. Gigi paused the playlist.

“Everything okay, Gigi?” Nicky questioned.

Gigi took a breath. “Yes, but there’s something I have to tell all of you.”

Jan locked eyes with Gigi, already knowing what she was going to say.

“What is it?” Jaida asked setting down her brush.

“I like girls.”

Jaida ran to Gigi to give her a hug. “We love you.”

Jan laughed. “Welcome to the club.”

As Gigi unpaused the music, she breathed a sigh of relief as she topped her nude lip with gloss.

“All done!” Jan announced as she brushed powder off of Jackie’s face.

Once Gigi saw Jackie, she exclaimed, “Oh, wow.”

Jackie was already an extremely beautiful girl, but Jan’s handiwork enhanced her features. Because she knew that Jackie wasn’t one for the extravagant, Jan stuck with neutrals that gave Jackie the most effortless no-makeup-makeup look. Gigi knew that Jan was a talented makeup artist, but the makeup she did on Jackie proved it, because it was the exact opposite of Jan’s colorful halo eye she did on herself.

“Holy shit! I look good.”

Jan rolled her eyes. “You always look good, baby.”

“Thank you,” Jackie said as she kissed Jan on the cheek.

“We must commemorate this momentous occasion,” Jaida said dramatically as she signaled everyone to come in for a group photo.

“You have to take it,” Nicky said. “You have the longest arms.”

Jaida rolled her eyes. “Always.”

Once there were a few photos they were all satisfied with Gigi looked at her phone. “If we need to make a liquor run, we should probably leave now.”

Everyone piled in to Gigi’s Jeep, the group was enthusiastically discussing the night ahead. On the way to the liquor store, Jaida, who was already twenty one, made a list of what she had to purchase.

“Y’all are gonna make me look like I have a drinking problem. You best be Venmo-ing me interest,” she teased.

“We don’t have interest in France, I don’t know what that is,” Nicky joked.

Jaida playfully hit her. “You’ve lived here for over ten years.”

 Nicky shushed her. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Jesus Christ, just kiss already,” Gigi teased as she pulled into the liquor store’s parking lot.

Once Jaida was inside the store, Jan spoke up. “What’s actually going on between you two?”

Nicky shrugged. “Just something for us to blow off some steam.”

Jackie hesitated. “Nicky, you realize that Jaida’s never had a girlfriend before.”

“Yeah, and?”

“She also falls really hard really quickly.”

Nicky exhaled. “She never told me that. She told me that she was good keeping it casual. She tried to bring it up a while ago, but I just thought… I feel terrible.”

“It’s not your fault, honey,” Jan said.

Before Nicky could respond, Jaida returned to the car.

“That was fast,” Gigi said.

“I’ve been to that store so many times, I know where everything is.”

Gigi had heard from other people that Brita had a large house, but she didn’t expect it to be quite so big. The driveway which was lined with cars spanned the length of most people’s front yards. The house looked to be three stories and was a modern build, which was a contrast to the other ranch-style houses in the area. The music could be heard from outside of the house, and Gigi mused about how Brita was lucky that she had no neighbors.

“Damn,” Gigi said as she shut her car door.

“Yeah,” Jaida began. “Brita’s parents are fucking loaded.”

“Clearly,” Jan said.

The inside of the house was just as grandiose as the outside. Gigi thought that it looked like the sample rooms inside of furniture stores. She didn’t realize that people’s houses actually could look like that. The living room was decorated with fairy lights and streamers, and in the corner were two gold balloons that said 21. The party was already abuzz, the entirety of the first floor was full of people, most of which Gigi didn’t recognize, and was almost certain Brita probably didn’t either.

Brita greeted them at the door, pulling them into a hug. Gigi could already smell the alcohol. “Hi, babes!”

“Happy birthday, bitch!” Jaida exclaimed handing Brita a fifth of Everclear.

Brita’s laugh was loud enough that it could be heard over the music. “You rotted bitch.”

“On our first season together, Brita drank way too much Everclear and got super hungover, and had to call out the next day,” Jaida explained. “You best be getting that drunk again tonight. If I see you at work tomorrow, I’m going to be pissed.“

“I have tomorrow off,” Brita said smugly.

“You’re going to need it,” Jan teased.

“Thanks! So over there we have a photobooth, beer pong in the dining room, the pool’s available if you want, too. Oh, and if you need a place to get down and dirty,” she looked at Nicky and Jaida. “Just don’t use my bedroom.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Jaida said, rolling her eyes.

As everyone was about to explore, Brita screeched, “Wait!”

“What?” Gigi asked.

“Let’s do a shot of this.” Brita raised the bottle of Everclear.

“Oh dear, God,” Jackie said making gagging noises.

“It’s my birthday, bitches!”

Since nobody could argue with that, they went in to the kitchen. In the attached dining room, an intense game of beer pong was going down with Widow and Heidi against Crystal and some boy Gigi vaguely recognized as being one of the team leads in games. Trying to stay casual, Gigi waved to Heidi and Widow who smiled in return. Thankfully, Crystal’s back was turned to Gigi, and by the time she turned, Gigi had her back turned to take the shot.

“I’m already too drunk to pour the shots,” Brita slurred.

Jaida rolled her eyes as she took the bottle and expertly poured shots.

“To Brita!” Gigi said raising her glass.

“To Brita!” Everyone repeated as they toasted, set the shot on the table, and took the shot.

Gigi thought she was good at taking shots. But, Gigi had also never had Everclear. Convinced that its reputation preceded it, she didn’t properly prepare herself. She thought she was just taking a shot of cheap vodka, not a shot of rubbing alcohol.

“Merde!” Nicky exclaimed.

Jackie set her glass down as she winced. “That was so bad, Nicky forgot how to speak English!”

Because she couldn’t get the taste of shitty vodka out of her mouth, the only thing Gigi could do was to drink something else. The Whiteclaw Jaida bought for her tasted like juice in comparison, so much so that Gigi drank it a lot faster than she should have.

As Gigi felt the alcohol hit, Jan said, “Let’s go take pictures.”

Most of the time, Gigi found photobooths to be tacky. They were a staple of boring weddings and basic-ass graduation parties. But, because she already had a nice buzz going, she gladly posed with oversized sunglasses. 

Everyone sat on a red leather couch as they began drinking. Jan and Jackie shared a bottle of rum that they chased with Diet Coke. Jaida was chasing her Jack with ginger ale. Nicky, on the other hand, was shooting whiskey like there was no tomorrow. Gigi felt lame that everyone else wad drinking liquor but her, but she didn’t care. She wanted to enjoy what she was drinking.

When a Madonna song began playing, the girls screeched and made their way to the dancefloor. Gigi had decent rhythm, but tonight, as far as she was concerned, she was killing it. As she dropped low, she almost fell, but kept her balance as she made her way back up. While she watched Jackie and Jan dancing closely and watched Nicky grind against Jaida, Gigi couldn’t help but feel like a fifth wheel. She remedied the situation by cracking open another Whiteclaw. 

“I need a break,” Nicky announced when the song ended.

Jan whispered something in Jackie’s ear before saying, “We’ll be back!”

“May I have this dance, Ms. Hall?” Gigi asked holding her hand out.

“Oh, bitch, you know it.”

After a few songs, Gigi announced, “I’ll be back!”

It was the time of the night that Gigi needed to break her seal. Unfortunately for her, there was a line for the bathroom. She dramatically jumped up and down until she made it to the bathroom. Once she finished, she was greeted by a sobbing Jaida.

“Jaida, what the fuck is wrong?” Gigi asked leading her into a bedroom upstairs.

“Nicky,” Jaida managed.

“What about Nicky?”

“I went to go find her to see if she wanted to dance or something, but then… I saw her… and I saw Brita. On the couch… making out.”

It was very clear that Jaida had too much to drink. For a while, Gigi was convinced that this year would break the streak of Jaida getting her heart broken. Even though Gigi wanted to give Jaida some tough love and tell her she and Nicky weren’t exclusive, she knew it wasn’t the time for that. Instead, she wrapped her in a hug.

“Hey,” Gigi said stroking Jaida’s hair. “It’s okay.”

“I knew that she didn’t want a relationship. Why does this hurt so much?”

“Because you like her, clearly a lot.”

“Why does this always happen?” Jaida wailed.

Gigi knew she wasn’t good at comforting people, but decided to try her best. “I don’t know. But Jaida, your makeup is far too pretty to cry it all off.”

Hoping that Jaida would find her comment funny, Gigi tried to laugh. This only made Jaida cry harder. Fuck. Gigi knew she wasn’t any good at any of this, but she knew who was. She needed to find Jan before Jaida lost her mind.

“I’ll be back,” Gigi said leaving a sobbing Jaida in the bedroom.

Gigi searched the entire first floor for Jan with no luck. Eventually, she ran into Jackie. 

“Gigi, what the hell is happening? Jaida’s apparently crying, Nicky left… What’s going on?” Jackie demanded.

“I guess Jaida found Brita and Nicky making out.”

Jackie groaned. “Of course Because why would she be able to make it a summer without getting her pretty little heart broken?”

When Jackie and Jan made their way back in the bedroom, Jaida was right where Gigi left her.

“Do you know where Jan is?” Gigi questioned as Jackie was hugging a very distraught Jaida.

“I think she’s outside.”

“If anyone knows how to handle this, it’s her,” Gigi said as she walked downstairs.  

Gigi realized just how drunk she was as she stumbled around trying to find Jan. Eventually, she found her comforting some random drunk girl. To Gigi’s horror, the random drunk girl ended up being Crystal. 

“Uh, I need you,” Gigi said awkwardly walking to Jan. 

Jan looked at Gigi and mouthed, “Help me,” as she broke away from Crystal. “What’s up, gorg?”

Crystal awkwardly stood next to Jan, swaying back and forth. Gigi couldn’t help but wonder how much Crystal had to drink.

“It’s Jaida.”

“Oh my God, I haven’t seen Jaida in ages,” Crystal slurred.

Jan shushed Crystal. “What’s wrong with her?”

“She found Nicky making out with Brita,” Gigi explained.

Jan groaned. “This is bad.”

“That’s really not good. Are they fighting?” Crystal tried as hard as possible to not slur her speech. “Fighting is bad.”

Rolling her eyes, Jan said, “Yes, honey. Fighting is bad. Really bad.“

Crystal stumbled toward Gigi. “Gigi, I’m really sorry we’re fighting.”

Gigi ignored her. “Jan, can you do that thing where you comfort people when they’re crying?”

“I can try,” Jan said.

“Gigi! Stop ignoring me. We’re fighting! And I don’t want us to!” Crystal pouted.

“Crystal, we can discuss this when you’re sober,” Gigi said firmly.

“I’m sober enough!” Crystal said jumping up and down. She then stopped and put one hand over her mouth and one on her stomach.

“Crystal. No!” Gigi screeched.

It was too late. Crystal lost all the alcohol she’d consumed. Jan reacted quickly enough to take a step back, but Gigi wasn’t that lucky. Gigi screamed as her favorite boots became covered in vomit.

"What the fuck?!” Gigi screamed. 

[onewfantaesy]

Taemin is adjusting well :D does he ever get the courage to go visit his guardian angel parents in prison after a few years? Write them because he still loves them? Or is he advised by sooman and his therapist to completly block them out of his life?

Upside Down: The Letter

(tw abuse, kidnapping)

Taemin is advised by both his therapist and Sooman to not seek out any contact with the couple who kidnapped him, at least not so soon. It might do more harm than good right now, they told him.

They’re in jail for a long time, but not forever. Fifteen years. Taemin had been told that was a lenient sentencing. He didn’t think it sounded very lenient.

It wasn’t hard to find out how to contact them. A private browser and a few searches later, and he had mailing addresses for both of them, for the two separate prisons they were in. It still made his heart ache at the idea of his parents being in prison. Like criminals. They weren’t criminals.

He can’t go visit them. There was no way it would work. He’s a minor and the supposed victim and he would no doubt need Sooman to sign him in, not to mention how he would even get there?

So he decided to write a letter. The same one to both of them, pretty much.

Hi Mom,

It feels really weird writing you a letter and not being able to just talk to you. But a lot of people told me I can’t talk to you yet, so I can’t even try to call you and it sucks a lot. I want to visit you so so bad but I know no one will let me. I just want you to know I miss you a lot and I want to see you really bad, but for now all I can do is send you letters. It’s better than nothing I guess. I hope you’ll write me back.

This has been the absolute worst year of my entire life. Every time I thought it couldn’t get worse, it got a million times worse.

The people they sent me to, my “parents,” were the worst. They were evil. Completely evil. Then they said I was actually fourteen not sixteen and they wouldn’t even let me go in the right grade at school, they would get all pissed whenever I said I wasnt supposed to be in first year, and they made me repeat it. I hated it. My new school was stupid and gross and everyone was stupid and gross.

I won’t tell you what else happened because I don’t want to make you upset. I ended up getting taken away from them after a few months. I was happy to be away from them. But I thought it would mean I would get to go back to you, but it didn’t, and it just made everything worse. But they’re not my parents. You and Dad are my parents. I just want you to know you’re still my parents. You’ll always be my parents, I don’t care what anyone else says. Everyone else says I have Stockholm Syndrome. I don’t even really know what Stockholm Syndrome is but I know I don’t have it.

Then I ended up at this group home. It was called a boys home or something. Like forty other teenage boys all in this one big gross house and there were four of us in each room and it was the worst. I’m never gonna complain about the SHINee dorm ever again.

Then I got sent to another new school and they still put me in first year and I hated it even more and no one would listen to me at all. And my roommates were crazy and evil.

But then Lee Sooman visited me and he promised everything would be okay. I thought he was gonna say he found a way for me to go back to you and Dad. But he said I had to wait. And to fight back if anyone hurt me.

So I fought back but then I got in a lot of trouble and so I ran away. I went to the company building. And then Sooman adopted me. He adopted both of us. And I hadn’t seen brother at all and I missed him so much but he’s here now. I still can’t believe Sooman adopted him too. He’s really nice. I think he’s a good dad.

And I still don’t really know what’s going and everyone still says I’m only fifteen and it all feels like a nightmare.

I miss you. I miss you so much. Please write me back because I miss you more than anything and I still feel like I’m in a nightmare.

I told everyone I think you and Dad are my guardian angels. Because you didn’t kidnap me, you saved me. Right? Because you love me.

I love you. Please write me back.

Love,

Taemin

Taemin includes both the address for the dorm and for home for them to write him back. And for weeks, Taemin checks both mailboxes religiously, to best anyone else to them, so no one will see if he gets a letter from a prison. It has to be a secret. It has to be a total secret.

But when he still hasn’t gotten any letters after three weeks, he loses hope. He gets frustrated and upset and angry, and he thinks he’s never going to hear from his parents ever again.

Until he comes home after school one day to find Sooman sitting at the kitchen table holding his head up, a letter in front of him. Just a single letter, still in the envelope. Unopened.

“Are you mad at me?” is the first thing out of Taemin’s mouth.

“No,” Sooman says immediately, and he sits up straight and motions for Taemin to come sit down with him.

So Taemin goes over, sits in the furthest end from Sooman as he can, and he keeps his backpack on his lap to hug close to him.

It’s a letter from his mom. Sitting there in the table. Staring at him.

“Can I open it?”

Sooman sighs and runs a hand over his face, but he pushes the letter over to Taemin.

“You can open it,” he says softly. “But I want you to read it here first. With me.”

“Out loud?”

“No, not if you don’t want,” Sooman says. “I just would like to be with you while you read it.”

Taemin tears into the envelope with eager fingers, rips the paper out, and unfolds it so fast he almost tears it in half.

And the first thing he does is run his fingers over his name written in his mom’s handwriting. Because it’s something so simple but he missed seeing it, reminds him that she still exists, that she’s still there and still thinking about him.

But not even halfway through the letter, he’s gripping the paper too tight and he’s got tears in his eyes. Because she’s telling him he’s wrong. The one person in the world who should be agreeing with him, who should think exactly the same as him. And she’s saying exactly what everyone else is.

Taemin, your father and I love you more than anything. We took you in because we love you. But we aren’t your guardian angels. And we never were.

What we did was wrong. We wanted to help you and we wanted you to be our child, but we did it the wrong way. And we will never regret taking you or your brother, because we will always love you, but that doesn’t make it right.

“She’s wrong,” he argues through fresh tears, shaking his head. “She’s wrong. They are my guardian angels, they are. I know it.”

He’s crying and his head is dipped low, the letter crinkling in his hands.

All Sooman does is move into the chair next to Taemin, and he puts a comforting arm around Taemin’s shoulders, squeezing his arm. Taemin tries reading the rest, tries to get through the end of the letter, but the tears are blurring his vision and the sobs he refuses to let out are wracking his entire body, and he just can’t.

“I think now,” Sooman says softly, letting Taemin turn into him, hugging him back, “you understand why we said it was too soon to try to contact them.”

“But why?” he asks, his voice muffled. “I don’t - I don’t understand.”

“I don’t either,” Sooman says. “They may not even understand.”

“I just - I can’t-” he stammers, “If they’re not my guardian angels, then - then what are they?”

Sooman is quiet. Doesn’t answer for a few minutes, just continues holding Taemin close. And Taemin is sure he’s going to get lectured or yelled at about how his guardian angel idea is stupid and childish and he’s been told before that it isn’t true so he needs to stop believing it.

Instead, Sooman’s voice is soft and reassuring as he tells Taemin, “They were your parents. And in many ways, they will always be your parents. Because I do truly believe they loved you. And they loved your brother. And they loved the family you all were together.”

It surprises Taemin, because it’s not really something Sooman has ever said, not really something anyone has said since all of this started.

“But I want you to know,” Sooman says, “that you have a family right here that loves you, too. And we all only want what’s best for you.”

Taemin nods, tears still falling from his eyes.

The letter is put away somewhere safe. Somewhere Taemin can read it again later. When he’s ready. And when the letter from his dad comes, Taemin asks Sooman to keep it with the letter from his mom.

“Just until I’m ready,” he says.

“Just until you’re ready,” Sooman agrees. “And you can tell me whenever that is.”

It helps. Taemin is glad to know they’re in a safe place, even if he doesnt know when he’ll be ready to finally read them.

[kunoichi-ume]

For the WIP sampler: while I'm curious about Noara's death, I'd much rather hear about her adventures!

Send me an ask with the title that most intrigues you and interests you and I’ll post a little snippet of it or tell you something about it!

Sure you don’t wanna hear about Noara dying? About Torian getting there just in time to be too late to save her, but early enough to get to say goodbye? To say an edited version of the Mandalorian wedding vows because even if she doesnt know it he won’t make her lie to him (about raising children together I mean)? About Noara asking if now she can sleep, just for a moment, and Torian knows it will be longer? 

No? Okay. 

Actually writing her dying at all was a writing exersize that @cinlat sort of dared me to do, sort of a “you never know your character until you put them through ALLLLLL the hell” thing cause I don’t really plan to kill Noara. (Sith Noara however... her days are numbered.)

Noara’s adventure log started when I felt I didn’t really know Noara well enough to keep writing I’ve Got You and was kicking myself for starting the fic so far into the canon story so she wouldn’t be able to grow through her experiences as I worked on her (instead she had to be a finished product and that was bugging me so much!) so I started on Tython and getting into her head from the start.

Have a couple snippets, cause the start of this post was rude I know. They are a bit on the long side, but other than @cinlat who I am pretty sure I shared this doc with, odds are no one else will see this fic if and when I pick it up again because it was more character study than anything but damn if I didnt have fun with it.

Noara’s thoughts as she arrives on Tython to start her trials:

This was the farthest from home she had ever been, not counting wherever she had been before the Jedi brought her to the enclave she’d been raised in. Now she’d left the only home she’d ever known to prove her worth and, hopefully, pass her trials. If she didn’t her dreams of traveling the galaxy and helping people would be gone. She’d be stuck in a research position or raising crops or something else equally unfulfilling even if she understood the necessity of it.

Failure wasn’t an option, not for Noara.

If all the times she had snuck out of her academic classes were any indication, she wouldn’t enjoy life as a scholar.

And the first time she takes a life, even if it’s a Flesh Raider determined to kill her is a big moment for her too:

Noara followed the rock formations, giving her on side where an ambush was less likely, and rounded a corner to see exactly what she had worried she might when she heard their name. Three of the reddish-pink rough skinned creatures crouched on the ground feasting on dead bodies. To make it worse two of the bodies were Jedi and one was their own kind. Flesh eaters and cannibals. That image was going to stick with.her. 

Adjusting her grip on her sabers, wishing she had weapons as real as this fight was going to be, she stepped around the rocks and crouched slightly. Pulling the Force around her, she leapt, propelling herself the considerable distance between her and the Flesh Raiders. They reared up as she landed, one coming at her with a training saber it probably stole off one of the dead Padawans, while the other two drew blasters. 

Reacting quickly, she blocked the first Flesh Raiders first strike before Force pushing it away to buy her time to deal with the other two. As it stumbled away, she slashed her blades at the two firing at her. They knew how to use the blasters, but their aim was horrendous. They hadn’t had these weapons long and she was easily able to sidestep their shots and cut each across the chest with the electrified edges of her blades. 

The creatures cried out, horribly gargled sounds by their misshapen mouths, as they fell. An angry cry behind her reminded Noara of the third Flesh Raider and she turned just in time to block a strike aimed at her skull. Before the beast could react to her quick movement, she stabbed it through the gut with her other weapon. 

It fell, dead, at her feet and Noara had to yank her training saber out of it’s ribcage where it had gotten lodged. She turned her sabers off and frowned at the blood, a sickly brown color, that clung to them. She wanted to clean them but had a feeling this wouldn't be her last fight and that it would be a wasted effort. 

It wasn’t until the smell hit her that what she had just done really sank in. She’d killed them, hadn’t even hesitated. Noara waited for the regret, the sickening guilt her masters had told her would accompany every life she took, but it didn’t come. Just relief that it was them lying on the ground and not her and the familiar thrill she always felt when sparring. She’d assumed that it would be different in a real fight, that it would be less exciting to win when it meant something else died but it wasn’t.

That thought scared her, because she knew how it sounded. It went against everything Jedi stood for and were taught. Taking a deep breath, she pushed all of that away to meditate on later. She was in a dangerous situation and there were other Padawans depending on her. 

And younger Noara might just have an attitude problem, but ya gotta admit the Flesh Raider problem on Tython was seriously mismanaged...

When Noara answered her com a small image of Knight Weller, bending down to brace a wound on his leg, appeared. He looked her image over in relief. “You’re unharmed, good. A Flesh Raider shot me in the leg while I was rescuing some Padawans. No idea where they got blasters, but they know how to use them. I’ve been evacuated to a medcenter but the fighting isn’t over.”

Noara sighed but bit back the comment she wanted to make. For a planet that should be full of some of the galaxy's best warriors they were pretty bad at crisis management. “Will there be reinforcements coming? I’m up to my neck in monsters here.”

Weller nodded. “Some are already there, but they keep pouring in. We need to stop them at the source. Padawan Unaw Aharo found a cave the Flesh Raiders tunneled through to get into the valley. I need you to go and make sure they don’t get more reinforcements through it.”

Noara closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Her patience was wearing thin, the handling of this situation left much to be desired and her understanding was that all Jedi on Tython were meant to be taking their trials. How any could be at that point and defenseless was beyond her. As far as she had seen, she was the only competent warrior on the whole planet but she wasn’t near arrogant enough to think she could take on every Flesh Raider out there on her own. “I don’t know how much I can do on my own, but I’ll do whatever I can to push them back and see if there is a way to seal the tunnel.”

“You won’t be alone for long,” Weller reassured her. “Master Orgus Din is on his way as well. We need to end this conflict before anyone else gets hurt. Find the cave along the east mountain ridge. May the Force be with you.”

His image winked out of sight and she huffed in annoyance. It had been a few hours since she had been sent into the field to fight the invaders and they were finally sending a member of the council to come help? What were the Jedi Masters doing while Padawans were being captured and killed? So far all she had learned on Tython was that she was lucky to have finished her combat training on Naboo before making the journey, being sent here without it could have been akin to a death sentence.

Master Doran had warned her the trials would be difficult when he tried to talk her into putting them off until she was a little older, but somehow Noara didn’t think this was what he meant.

And then her day just gets worse and worse when she gets to the cave and has to face the rogue Jedi commanding the Flesh Raiders:

The rogue Jedi lunged at her, swinging his lightsaber toward her neck. 

Noara just managed to dodge the blow, stepping quickly back. The second swing she caught with one of her training sabers, the blue energy blade crackling against the metal. 

“You think to defeat me with those toys?” He laughed, pushing her back with his superior strength and leaving marks in the ground where Noara tried to keep her footing. When most of his weight was committed to pushing her, she dropped to the ground, ducking under his arm and slipping behind him as he stumbled past her.

Using a move Master Doran always called reckless, she leapt into the air. Using the Force she propelled herself across the cavern to where his Flesh Raider backup was. Noara knew that if she wanted a glimmer of a chance to get out of here alive, she couldn’t face all three of them at once. Landing between them, Noara pushed the Force in a ring out from her body and knocked both away from her and to the ground. Stunned, neither stirred. She turned just in time to block the rogue Jedi’s attack with her training sabers crossed in front of her. He pressed forward, forcing Noara to step back again.

Obviously he had an advantage in both size and strength over her. She was going to need to be faster and cleverer. Before he could make her step back again, Noara kicked him in the gut. Not letting up when he stepped back, she followed him, pushing his lightsaber away from her with one of her blades and hitting his sword arm as hard as she could with the other. He dropped the saber with a sharp cry. 

Noara turned, releasing one of her training sabers to call his weapon to her. Before she caught it he tackled her, his shoulder digging into her gut. As they tumbled to the ground she lost her grip on her other weapon. She was never much of a grappler, her creche mates had often wiped the floor with her in unarmed spars but she had learned enough to know she couldn’t let him pin her. They landed hard on the ground, rolling a few times before he had straddled her waist and punched her in the face.

Lifting her hips off the ground, Noara tried to throw him off  but he was too high on her torso for that to work. Leaning forward he pinned her with his weight and wrapped his hands around her throat. Clawing at his fingers, she turned her head back and forth, trying to find a way out of this before remembering she was still armed. Pulling her leg up as close as she could, Noara blindly reached for her boot. Each of her boots had a dagger hidden in a discrete sheath inside the boot. 

Noara’s chest was on fire as she gasped for air and her vision was starting to dim. Reaching out to the Force for strength, she managed to grab the dagger’s hilt and pull it out of her boot. Without hesitation she stabbed him, driving the dagger into his side. He cried out in pain, releasing her neck and she was able to breath again. She ripped the dagger out of his flesh as he fell off of her. Running on pure adrenaline she followed him, burying the bloodied dagger hilt deep into his chest. 

Blood gushed around her hand and when he coughed it left bloody spots all over his face. “Killing me changes nothing,” he gasped wetly, “long live the new order.” The rogue Jedi took another gurgling breath before going limp under her and she felt his life force fading. 

Pushing herself away from his corpse, Noara tried to breathe through the pain in her chest and throat. 

“Look out!” Aharo cried, making Noara turn her head just in time to see the two forgotten Flesh Raiders approaching her. 

The dagger was still in the dead man’s chest but she spotted the lightsaber lying on the ground. She pulled it to her hand, activated it and threw it at them. With the Force she controlled it’s trajectory to strike them both. The Flesh Raiders fell to the floor, making similar death rattles to the ones she had heard all day. 

For a moment Noara didn’t move, leaning on her hand to keep herself upright while she waited for the next attack. When it didn’t come she slumped on the ground let out a shaky breath. Aharo, holding his gut, limped over to her. 

“That was amazing, I thought we were dead for sure,” he said, dropping to his knees next to her. “Are you alright?”

Noara nodded where she lay. “Yeah, I think so.”

[duker42]

(1) Hi! Im not sure if you are taking request or not but if you are can you do a levi x reader where the reader and him dated when they were living in the underground and he promised hed come back for her before going up to kill Erwin but obviously never did because he couldnt so he tried to forget about her and she (reader) ended up leaving the underground and eventually joined the scouts but he doesnt recognize her because shes changed a lot since they were kids/teenagers and she recognizes

💜Old Lovers💜

Y/N blinked as she looked at the Captain as he stood on the stage and looked over the newest recruits to the Survey Corps. Her breath caught as his eyes passed over her briefly before moving on to glare at the others that remained standing the in courtyard. Levi....

~~~~~

“Levi, I don’t trust this Lobov, don’t agree to it!” Y/N pleaded as she watched him inspect his ODM gear.

He looked over and raised an eyebrow at her protest. He had thought she would have jumped at the idea of living on the surface. Her face was worried as twisted her hands out of nervousness. The candlelight shone on her brassy red hair.

He put his triggers handles down and walked over to her, setting his arms around her lightly and pulling her against him. ”Everything’s going to be fine Y/N. As soon as I finish the job, I’m coming back for you.” He promised, a small smirk on his face as he looked down at his lover.

“Really?” Y/N looked up at his grey eyes which were quickly darkening as he leaned forward.

“Of course, I want you beside me on the surface. But before I go, why don’t you send me off properly?” He asked, cocking his eyebrow at her and flashing a wicked grin as he covered her mouth with his own.

~~~~~

She wondered if he didn’t recognize her because of her hair. He had only known her with the red dye she had soaked her hair in, hiding the true white blonde hair that would have attracted too much attention in the Underground.

She was upset that he was standing there, looking exactly like he had the day he left her in his bed. The day he had disappeared out of her life for the past four years. He had forgotten her and moved on.

Her eyes lowered as Commander Erwin continued to speak to the recruits that had chosen to join the Survey Corps, talked to her.

~~~~~

Levi scowled as he looked over the pitiful few recruits that had found the balls to join the Scouts.

He eyes paused on the tiny blonde, before moving on. His thoughts immediately went to Y/N and it pissed him off.

He shoved down the guilt that rose up in his chest. After everything had gone to hell and Farlan and Isabel had been killed, he had given in and pledged his life to the Scouts. Decided to follow Erwin.

He had tried to convince them to let him go back. To bring Y/N up to the surface with him. But Commander Shadis had thought that his newest weapon would just disappear into the shadows of the Underground and he hadn’t been able to convince him that it wouldn’t happen. He just wanted her with him.

When he realized it wasn’t going to happen, he buried his heart under layers of ice and tried to forget the woman he still dreamed about. The one that he still woke up and expected to see beside him, four years later.

The fact that a brat reminded him of her could be nothing but trouble. He growled and turned away, ready to return to base and the solitude of his office.

~~~~~

Commander Erwin called Y/N into his office, making her very nervous to have a face to face with her highest superior her first day in the Scouts.

“You’re Y/N, correct?” Erwin asked, looking through her file as he motioned for her lower her salute.

“Yes, sir.” She answered, looking closely at the tall man that Levi was supposed to kill four years ago, sitting there very much alive.

“And you are from the Underground?” He sounded bored and Y/N wondered if this was routine for the Commander to verify everyone’s information on their first day.

“Yes, sir.” She stood a bit straighter, unwilling to let anyone look down on her because of her background.

“You’re a bit older than the average recruit.” It wasn’t a question but she felt that he wanted an explanation.

“I lost my....family, four years ago. It took me a year to finish saving up for the passage to the surface.” Y/N said looking directly into the Commander’s blue eyes.

He studied her for a long moment before nodding thoughtfully. He leaned back and appraised her. She twisted her hands behind her back and she saw his eyes drift to the movement.

He sat up and made his decision. “Report to Captain Levi. You’re dismissed, Y/N. Welcome to the Scouts.”

Y/N saluted and turned on her heel and marched out of his office.

She missed the smirk on his face as he watched the door close behind her.

~~~~~

Levi looked up at the knock on the door with irritation. “Come in.”

The recruit that reminded him of Y/N opened the door and he sighed. He should have known that Erwin would have picked up on his unease. Bastard never missed much. He wondered why he would send the girl that reminded him of his past lover to him now.

He had only ever mentioned Y/N once, after having far more to drink than he should have. He hadn’t been drunk, but his tongue had loosened. When Erwin had told him about his lost love Marie, Levi found himself sharing his memories of Y/N. The way she looked, the way she smelled, the way she twisted her hands when she was nervous.

The next morning, Erwin hadn’t mentioned their conversation, but Levi could be certain that he had never forgotten. He wondered if he was making him face his past, or just pouring salt on that wound to harden his shell a bit more.

“What do you want?” He asked irritably, looking down at his desk.

Y/N blinked at his tone. He had always been surly, but it had increased during their time apart. She moved deeper into his office and looked around. It was clean, making her smile. Some habits never died it seemed. The smile slid off her face as she started getting nervous about being in this room with him.

Her hands came together and started twisting together as she tried to tell herself that she didn’t love him anymore, knowing that it was a complete lie. She had always loved him, would never stop.

She didn’t notice him looking up and freezing at the sight of her hands twisting. His eyes widening before narrowing intently as they darted up to her face. She was too busy looking out the window, wondering how she was going to stand being around him without being hurt.

He caught her attention when he appeared in front of her. He was always so damn fast. His hand caught her chin between his fingers and pulled it up to he could look at it more closely.

“Y/N?” He whispered.

Her breath caught at the sound of her name on his lips again. It had been long since she heard it.

She didn’t answer, couldn’t answer because his mouth was covering hers, his tongue pressing into her mouth desperately. It was like he was starving and she was his meal. He pulled her against him, anchoring her to his body with his strong arms as he plundered her mouth.

She felt like she was drowning in him, his scent surrounding her and the taste of him on her tongue after so long being without it made her start to cry.

He pulled back, tasting her tears and brushing his fingers across her face to flick them away. His lips are gentle as they cover hers again, sweet and loving. Y/N sighed into his mouth and he couldn’t help but pull her harder against him again.

“Y/N, Gods, I’ve dreamed of you for years.” He whispered, running his lips down her throat as he placed his hands on her ass, pulling her up against his hardening groin.

“Why didn’t you come for me?” She asked, dousing cold water on his desire.

He looked at her sincerely as he answered. “They wouldn’t let me. I begged for months. The old Commander wasn’t as trusting in me as Erwin.”

Y/N nodded. Levi may have been a lot of things, but he was never a liar, not to her. His eyes asked for permission and she pushed her lips back against his in answer.

He groaned and pulled her up into his arms, carrying her through a door into a bedroom and covered her body with his own as he laid her down. “Y/N, I need you....” He groaned against her neck, his fingers starting to strip her of the straps of her gear.

Her own hands push insistently at his own, wanting to feel his skin under her hands and against her own.

They were bare in minutes, their skin hot and slick with desire as their mouths continued to tangle. She wrapped her legs around him and cried out as he desperately drove himself into her body.

His own strangled gasp at feeling her again almost made her come undone. His invasion of her sex was a little painful, she hadn’t been with anyone since him.

He felt her tighten around him, knew that like him, she hadn’t been with anyone else. He felt a sense of pride that she had waited for him, that she was in his arms again with no ghosts between them. His eyes rolled back as she flexed around his cock and a low moan escapes his lips.

It wasn’t a hard pace, but it was steady, his body rocking into hers with even thrusts. He couldn’t stop his hands from moving over her body, feeling as much of her as he could as tried to keep from coming too soon.

Her body responded to his like the last time they were together was the night before, not four years earlier. She felt herself shudder as his cock beat steadily against her back wall, making her gasp with every thrust. Her moans were getting louder, causing Levi to muffle her with his own mouth as he pushed her over the edge.

Bolts of pleasure shot through her as she cried out into his mouth, Levi eagerly swallowing the sound of her pleasure. He felt her pull him deeper into her body as she came around him. The feeling making his body tingle as he came to the edge of his own release.

Levi pushed hard into her body and stilled, gasping loudly and throwing his head back as his cum shot out of him with a force he hadn’t felt in years, making him weakly collapse against her, spent.

They barely had time to catch their breath before there was a knock on the door. Levi hurriedly redressed and walked out to his office to answer the door while Y/N slipped back into her own clothes.

She listened at the door and her eyes widened as she heard the voice of the Commander in Levi’s office.

“So I see the old lovers are reunited.” He says clearly, an amused tone in his voice as he addresses Levi.

“Yeah, so get out of here so we can continue.” Levi spat out.

“I’m happy it’s her, Levi.” Erwin said quietly.

“Me too. Now get the hell out of my office.” Levi said, moving him towards the door. “And Erwin? We won’t be leaving this room tomorrow.”

Erwin laughed as he open the door. “I expect nothing less from old lovers. You have years to make up for.”

Y/N smiled as she heard Levi flip the lock and call out as he headed back to his bedroom. “You better not have put your clothes back on, Y/N. You won’t need them for the next 24 hours.”

She grinned as the door flew opened and he settled his hot gaze on her, his smile wicked as he advanced on her hungrily.

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