#cpa notes

[bloggin-til-cpa]

Final (and only) review on exam day 🥹

Will debrief of the whole past month after my exam.

Wish me luck!!

[taycpastudies]

8/16/23

Yesterday was a little frustrating. I “passed” my mini exam with a 57 (the study software says over 50 is “passing” even though it doesn’t feel great!) but I flagged just about every multiple choice question and totally bombed one of the simulations. But that’s ok, on I go!

I definitely got like a 30 on my first mini exam for audit, and it turned out fine, so I’m just gonna keep moving and I’ll take it again after I go through all the review material in a few weeks. If I bomb it then I’m in trouble, but for now I’m trying to find my peace with it. I do hate not raising my “Total Completion” score everyday, but I know the mini exams are important.

My goal is to finish Unit 3 on Sunday or earlier, which will be a little tricky since my boyfriends sister and her husband are coming into town tonight, but they know how important this is to me!

On to the next!

[fazcinatingblog]

Might waste another $1000 on a CPA subject like Australian taxation just for the fun of it

[togrowoldinv]

Secret Santa

Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader

When Natasha gets your name for Secret Santa, she tries to think of the perfect gift for you

Note: I’m back! Well, technically I never left but I’ve been up to my ears in studying for the cpa exam. I took what was hopefully my last exam today, and let Natasha come back into my brain lol. Enjoy this holiday fluff!

Natasha Masterlist 1, Natasha Masterlist 2, Natasha Masterlist 3, Main Masterlist

“Okay, on to the topic of the Christmas party. What if do Secret Santa names this year?” Tony suggests.

“What does that entail?” Steve asks what everyone else is thinking.

“Well, we’d all write down a few things we like. It gives the person who gets your name an idea of what you want,” Tony explains.

“I like it,” Steve agrees. “What does everyone think?”

A chorus of sures and okays follow.

“Y/n, can you take care of it?” Steve asks.

You agree easily. You’ve always loved the holidays so the idea of helping the Avengers have a good one is exciting. Especially since it’s your first year with the team.

You get everyone’s names on notecards and spend the rest of the day getting everyone to fill them out with gift ideas. Wanda helps you collect them from the team before the next team meeting the next morning.

“Okay, everyone I have all of the names here. Draw one and whatever you get is what you have. No switching allowed,” you tell the team, mainly Tony.

You eyeball him as you say it and he at least pretends to look offended before he grins.

When you get to Natasha, you smile at her shyly.

“What if I get my own name?” She asks with a smirk.

She reaches into the bowl of names before you can answer. Her expression is unreadable as she looks at the card.

“Good?” You ask.

“It’s good,” Natasha replies.

You move on and keep going until everyone’s been picked. You got Wanda, which should be super easy.

On the other hand, Natasha got you. She thinks about it for a few days before deciding that she doesn’t want to get you anything on your list. She decides to go to your best friend on the team for advice.

“You got a second?” Natasha asks, knocking on Wanda’s open doorframe.

“Oh,” the girl is caught off guard. She doesn’t spend much time talking to Nat aside from about missions. “Sure.”

Natasha walks in and closes the door behind her. She sits down at Wanda’s desk across from where the girl sits on her bed.

“Is everything okay?” Wanda asks.

Natasha doesn’t immediately assure her it is and she gets worried. “So, I got y/n for secret santa.”

Wanda’s tenseness goes away and she can’t help a little smirk forming as Nat is talking.

“And I know she has things on this list,” she says. “But I don’t think a single one of these things is good enough for her. I don’t know what I should get for her, but she deserves the best gift.”

“Natasha,” Wanda interjects. “You’re taking this way too seriously.”

“Oh,” Nat expresses. “She- well she loves Christmas, right? I saw how excited she’s been about the tree and then the secret Santa and the movies. All of it. I want it to be special for her.”

“That’s really sweet,” Wanda says. “You like her, huh.”

“Can you help me?” Natasha keeps the focus on the conversation at hand. She does like you though.

“Of course. Anything for y/n.”

“Thank you,” Natasha says, feeling the relief set in.

The two brainstorm ideas for a couple of hours. When Wanda shows late for your usual nightly dinner, she wears a grin.

“What?” You ask her. “Fun with Vision?”

Wanda chuckles and you share a laugh with her.

“Who’d you get for Secret Santa?” You ask her.

“I can’t tell you,” she says.

“Sure you can.”

“Who’d you get?” She counters.

“I can’t tell you.”

“Sure you can,” she mocks you.

The rest of the days leading up to Christmas go by fast. Unfortunately everyone had to go on a mission on Christmas Eve, so you’re all exhausted on Christmas Day morning.

Tony postponed the gift exchange until later in the day, and everyone is much more rested by then.

Even with the hustle and bustle, you notice Natasha hasn’t made it to the get together yet.

“Hey Clint, where’s Nat?” You ask the archer. He was working closely with her on the mission.

“I think she just needed to take some time alone.”

“Oh, okay.”

You go about the party for a few more minutes before deciding to go check on Natasha.

You go to her room and knock on the door. She takes a minute to answer, but finally the door opens to reveal a distressed Natasha.

Her hair is messy and she’s wearing a hoodie and sweatpants. You haven’t seen her this way before.

“Hey,” you say. “We missed you down there.”

“Sorry,” she says. “Uh, come in.”

Her room is clean and exactly like you expected it. There are a few photos of Natasha and Clint’s family on a dresser, but that’s really the extent of the decor.

“Are you okay?” You ask her.

“Yeah, just a bad mission.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Nat says. “It’s a me problem.”

“Hey, we’re teammates. And- we’re friends. It’s an us problem.”

Natasha can’t help but smile a little at that. You make her feel better by just being here.

“I don’t think I’m in the party mood. The guys aren’t so sensitive to my feelings.”

“Hey, that’s alright. I’ll just take your gift if you want me to. I’ll make sure it gets to the right person,” you explain.

“Oh, actually I had you. And I didn’t get a gift off of your list.”

Your eyes go wide. You didn’t even consider that Nat would get you. Thinking back to your list, you hope she didn’t find anything you wrote down as lame.

“Not because they were bad ideas. It’s just- I wanted to do something more meaningful,” she reads your mind.

Natasha crosses the room and grabs a box out of her closet. It’s wrapped nicely.

“You wrapped that?” You ask.

“You seem surprised,” Nat jokes. “I have skills.”

“Oh, I’m aware,” you say before blushing a bit. She smirks.

She hands you the box and you sit down on the edge of her bed together to open it. Nat watches you shyly as you open the gift.

“Natasha,” you whisper as you reveal the gift.

It’s a beautiful locket necklace.

“Open it,” she says.

On the inside of the locket, there’s a photo of your family. Your favorite photo to be exact.

“How did you-“

“Wanda helped,” Nat says. “I know you’ve been missing home since you joined the Avengers. I thought you’d want to have a piece of them with you on missions.”

“Natasha, that’s- well that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for me,” you say, fighting back tears.

“You like it then?”

“I love it. Thank you,” you say sincerely. “Will you put it on me?”

Nat nods and takes the necklace from your hands. She unclasps it and stands behind you to put it around your neck. Her hands are gentle as she clasps the necklace and brushes against your skin.

“Beautiful,” she says when you stand and face her.

“You are, yeah,” you surprise her by saying. You dare to reach out for her hand. She takes it easily and interlocks your fingers. “I wish I got you something.”

“Oh, I think you just gave me the best gift,” Natasha says.

“I did?”

“Mhm,” she confirms. “Come here.”

Natasha leans in, pulling you closer to her with the hand that’s free by the back of your neck. Her gentle hand from before has a bit more urgency.

You can’t help but smile as she kisses your lips. Finally, both of you think. Finally.

“Merry Christmas, y/n,” Natasha says when she breaks for air.

“Merry Christmas, Natasha.”

It doesn’t take long before you add a photo of Natasha to the other side of your locket. She’s with you always. Right beside your heart.

[kazumist]

SWEETLY BAKED WITH LOVE .ᐟ

✩ — in which zayne finds himself in a problem with his older patients relentlessly introducing and telling him about their daughters and granddaughters to him because he's single. what's a good way to shoo them off? perhaps wearing a keyring and fake dating your friend would do the trick!

✩ — includes: zayne x f!baker!reader. fluff. fake dating trope (not executed properly sorry i dont think i gave it justice), not much drama and confession scene is a bit boring imo :/, pace is a bit messy, based of that one part in the cdrama "the best thing", cw: food mentioned (baked sweets and wine), they're both idiots in love, wc: 7,166. i went insane Yes so what.

✩ — note: hi babes @koiukiy-o it's finally finished like can u believe it. i finished it in one fucking day initially but i woke up at 6am in the morning today (its around half past 7am by the time posting this) and added a bit more.

for zayne, being a young, famous, and favored doctor in akso hospital isn’t as pleasing as it sounds. only because the majority of his older patients try to match him up with their daughters with every given chance during their appointments scheduled with him. 

at first, it wasn’t all that serious. zayne even initially thought that maybe elderlies these days have started to grow accustomed to sharing stories of their children—of their daughters, specifically, who are coincidentally in the same age range as him. perhaps it was a new thing; yeah, that was probably it.

until the introductions became more frequent. 

ONE: AS SURPRISING AS A SUDDEN BLUEBERRY CHEESECAKE AT YOUR DOOR.

from a father whose daughter is a successful certified public accountant (CPA) to a mother whose daughter is currently a cardiology resident in a nearby hospital, the names and positions of these women have started to jumble in his head. all zayne could do is take a deep breath and smoothly deflect the questions of his patients regarding his current relationship status.

“dr. zayne, you know, i have this daughter..." here we go again. zayne tunes out whatever the old woman was saying, nodding every now and then to convince her that he was interested. the old woman’s daughter was something of a business owner, though it’s not like zayne is actually paying that much attention to the description his patient was giving him. his focus is solely on the results that are in his hands.

“do you have someone special in your life right now, dr. zayne?” zayne pauses; the shuffling of the lab reports in his hands stopped as he processed the question. 

does he?

zayne doesn’t think that he does.

he has a few people that he cherishes in his life, yes. but does he think of himself settling down with someone by his side? well… not really—not yet, at least. zayne hasn’t given it that much thought himself. “before i answer that question, let’s discuss what your results have given us…” this method of zayne changing the subject works like a charm every time he does it. and with a blink of an eye, the old woman forgot her question and left after getting her new prescriptions from him.

zayne leans back on his chair, taking off his specs and pinched the bridge of his nose for a moment. he takes a deep breath, until his peace is interrupted by a knock at his door. the old woman should’ve been the last one; yvonne just came in and told him so not so long ago. he sits up right, fixing his posture as his professionalism starts to take over.

yet when the door creaks open to reveal you, zayne’s shoulders relax as he sits back once again.

maybe his peace wasn’t interrupted after all.

“what brings you here?” he asks you, eyeing you suspiciously as you’re obviously hiding something from him behind your back. “i come bearing gifts—one sweet little blueberry cheesecake from your favorite bakery! tadaaaa!” you say, revealing the little box to zayne and settling it on his desk, hoping he’d also envision the imaginary jazz hands you were doing before putting a plastic fork on top of it for him to use.

zayne has a sweet tooth and that’s practically common knowledge to you. and with you owning a bakery... well, let’s just say that the youngest heart surgeon in linkon city plays his favorites when it comes to shops that sell sweet pastries. 

a smile cracks onto his face as he sees the box. gently removing the fork on top and opening the box, zayne inspects the blueberry cheesecake before him as if contemplating if he should eat it now or save it when he gets home. “you don’t have to eat it now, silly. i just wanted to drop it off before your work ends today,” you say.

“no, it’s alright. i’ll eat it now. the toppings could get ruined when i travel back home.”

as he starts taking a few bites, you propped your chin onto your palm and lean on it, staring at the sweet dessert that’s slowly being consumed right in front of you. “sooo, do you have someone in your life right now, dr. zayne?” you asked him, putting emphasis on the way you called him as a sign of mockery.

zayne deadpans at your question, suddenly stopping himself from getting another bite. his expression is clearly conveying a message to you wordlessly: are you being serious right now? but zayne just sighs and continues on getting another bite before replying. “how did you know about that?”

“i heard you two through the door. and when your last patient came out—she was a delight, by the way, greeting me so kindly—she suddenly asked me if i was your girlfriend! i obviously didn’t answer her properly and good thing yvonne came in to save the day and escort her out of the cardiology department.” you told him.

the sweetness of the small piece of blueberry glides across his senses as he listens to you. zayne finds himself sighing deeply for what seems like the nth today, twirling the fork in his hand as he thinks. he doesn’t like burdening this problem of his with you, especially when you have nothing to do with it. “seems like you’re thinking about a lot there. are your thoughts being consumed by the numerous names that got mentioned to you?” you teased.

“i beg your pardon?”

“i was only kidding! you looked so deep in thought there. is everything alright?”

zayne doesn’t know either. he doesn’t know how long he could keep deflecting and changing the topics when his patients try to pry into this part of his life. he has a soft spot for his patients, sure, and he’s satisfied with his job. though zayne didn’t know that he would be signing up for this when he became a cardiac surgeon.

“yes, my apologies. i seemed to have spaced out for a moment there.”

you glance over him, observing his mannerisms and his habits. whenever zayne twirls or plays with the item in his hand, it means he’s thinking. whenever he sits back on his chair, that means he’s relaxed. yet you never seen him space out—not until now, at least—and that’s what’s different.

odd.

but you didn’t push the topic further, as you’re well aware that zayne isn’t the type to express himself so freely. and as if a light bulb literally just gained it’s light inside your brain, the gears inside your head started turning as you suddenly got an idea. “i think i just got the greatest idea of my life.” you asked him.

“and what would that be?” he asks back. should i be scared? he thinks.

“you’ll see! just you wait and look forward to the next time i’ll drop by and visit.” you flash him a grin as zayne finishes the last bit of the blueberry cheesecake.

TWO: AS ENTICING AS SIX MACARONS SERVED RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU.

the next time you saw each other, you didn’t visit zayne. zayne visited you, striding towards you sitting behind the counter. today was a saturday. and during saturdays, you open your shop a bit later than your usual opening time during weekdays. 

seeing the doctor visit your shop sometimes gives you a pinch of nostalgia coursing through you. you never would’ve expected to form a connection with a praised doctor in linkon in your life. but you don’t really have any regrets about it. you enjoy the surgeon’s company and he seems to enjoy yours.

“and what brings you here today, dr. zayne?” you say, greeting him as his eyes scan the pastries displayed before him. “please, refrain from the formalities. do you have anything new to recommend?” he replies.

your gaze follows his as you join him in looking for a pastry to offer. “hmm… oh! i know! you could taste test a new macaron flavor i’ve been trying. would you mind taking a seat while i got get them for you?” zayne nods before finding himself a seat and you take that as your cue to start running towards the kitchen located at the inner part of your establishment. 

when you got out, you joined him at the two-seater table he decided on, sitting across from him. “lately, i’ve been indulging myself in making macarons, right? and i wanted a different flavor for a change so i paired two ingredients together! take a bite and guess what it is.” you said, pushing the box of macarons towards him.

zayne inspects the macarons in front of him, attempting to deduce the flavor. it has a light brown color, with the filling having a deeper shade of brown. could it be two types of chocolate? he thinks. 

“staring at it will get you nowhere if you don’t actually taste it, you know.”

he snaps out of his thoughts at your words. he awkwardly coughs into his fist, avoiding your gaze. you stifled a laugh at him but zayne noticed it, feeling his ears grow hot. “ahem. pardon me for that. i’ll taste them now.” he says, grabbing a piece of the pastry. as soon as he takes a bite, the familiar taste of coffee beans (perhaps roasted?) and nutella washes over his tongue.

you were right; this was a different flavor that you don’t see often. “it’s delicious. were the coffee beans roasted? or were they grounded?” a small gasp escapes your lips at his question. “it was roasted, yeah! i’m surprised you noticed that; i didn’t think anyone would.”

“i felt the small chunks of the coffee beans as i chewed. and nutella as a filling balances the taste of the beans. i’d say it’s a good product to endorse.”

“really?”

zayne hums in agreement, finishing the macaron in his hand before grabbing another one from the box. “i recall that you haven’t told me your “idea” yet since the last time we saw each other.” he says, before taking another bite.

“oh! sorry about that; i keep forgetting to stop by akso hospital lately. but worry not—i didn’t forget about my idea!” you replied, fishing something out of your pocket. it was a keyring, though it wasn’t that obvious at first glance. “your idea is... a keyring?” he asks.

“wrong, the keyword is ring!” you say, grabbing his hand to check if it fits on his ring finger.

you seemed unaware of the effect of your actions, suddenly taking zayne by surprise by your sudden touch. he feels the cold metal wrap around the ring finger of his dominant hand. “look, it’s a perfect fit! just remember to always have it on, especially when you have appointments and surely those introductions would be gone, right?”

zayne inspects the keyring around his finger, flipping his hand as he takes it in. “i never would’ve expected that a keyring could act as a marriage ring.” he states. “m-marriage ring?!” you exclaimed. i never really thought of it as that. you thought, mentally sweatdropping. “is it not supposed to be?” zayne’s gaze at you shows obvious confusion. “well… i guess it could serve as that. i just thought of it as some fake promise ring that you could use at most.”

“the purpose is the same. i don’t think it matters what it stands for—the main purpose of this is to show my older patients that i’m taken, right?”

“yup! it’s nothing much, really, but i feel bad for what you have to endure when you have your appointments. do you think it would work?” you reply.

“we just have to play our cards right and then we’ll see.”

“mhm! wait—we?”

“yes, we. did i say something wrong?” there he goes again with the confused look.

“what do you mean… we?” this better not be what i’m thinking. you hoped, bracing yourself for whatever bomb he was about to drop.

but just as your luck to that runs out, zayne replies. “i thought we were both going to be wearing keyrings?” fuck, i knew it. you thought. inside your head, you can envision yourself on all fours, punching the ground as you also try to think of something—anything to reply with. 

“but you’re the only one who has this... conflict. what use would it be if i also wore one?”

before zayne could even realize it, he already took a step and started sailing in dangerous, uncharted waters. “you told me a few times, including the time that you last visited, that my patients have wondered and asked if you were my significant other. wouldn’t it be more convincing if we were to uphold that sentiment?”

you swore you could feel your soul drain itself out of your body.

“so you want us to... fake date, basically? so we could stop your older patients from introducing their endless amount of daughters and granddaughters? did i get that right?” you ask again, just to be sure if what you’re hearing is actually right and real.

“yes, you’re quite spot-on.” 

“you’re lucky that i have two keyrings by coincidence.”

well, it’s not like it’s going to be anything serious. and it’s also beneficial for me because they also pester me with their questions every time i visit. the offer is way a bit enticing for it’s own good—but everything should be fine.

with a soft sigh and one macaron left on the box (you and zayne were snacking on them as you had your discussion), you spoke again. “you’ve got yourself a deal. you better start wearing that keyring, dr. zayne.”

“i don’t think you should be calling me that when we’re supposed to portray ourselves like a couple.” he remarked.

you choke on your own saliva at his statement. “w-we’ll talk about the other details another day! how does the next time i visit—which i actually promise to do now—sound?” cursing yourself for stammering (but how could you not when he caught you so off guard?), you try your best not to embarrass yourself any further. “that sounds good.”

as the last macaron on the box you served gets consumed, you find yourself securing a peculiar deal with a certain heart surgeon.

THREE: AS SOUR AS A BITE OF STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE MELTING ON YOUR TONGUE.

staying true to your promise, you visited zayne a few days after his visit to your bakery. you had the same keyring wrapped around your ring finger, hoping to find zayne the same. “are you busy?”

he glances at you from his monitor and you notice that his shoulders relax again when he realizes it was you in the doorway. “what pastry do you have in store for me this time?” he asks you as you approach to have yourself a seat on the small couch.

“sadly there’s no pastry today; i accidentally forgot to grab one from the bakery’s fridge before i left but next time i’ll bring you some strawberry shortcake!”

“i’ll take note of that.”

zayne then continues to speak. “about where we stopped our discussion last time... would it be okay with you to completely drop with the formalities in general? you don’t have to call me dr. zayne, especially when we’re in the hospital.”

“what do i call you then?”

“zayne would be just fine. almost no one calls me that here.”

“zayne, huh… zayne, zayne… zayne.” you repeat his name to get yourself used to it. “alright then, doct—i mean, zayne.”

he nods at you in acknowledgement as you shift your gaze at his dominant hand. surely enough, you saw that keyring on his finger. “i see you’re wearing the keyring. did it work so far?” you ask him. “actually, yes, it did. the introductions lessened and i found myself at peace with most of my appointments today.”

“so my plan does work. huh, i never would’ve thought.” zayne takes this as an opportunity to reply. “how about you? did your keyring work?” 

“not yet, i guess? when i arrived, yvonne told me that your appointments and checkups were done for the day. so i didn’t really encounter any of your patients today. maybe next time.”

-

zayne visited your bakery during the weekend again. although unfortunately, you weren’t there. one of your employees said that you were busy with an errand today so zayne just got a slice of yet another blueberry cheesecake on the go and quickly made his leave.

(he doesn’t see why he would stay when he isn’t sure of what time you’d return.)

-

the next time you and zayne saw each other, you had forgotten to bring the strawberry shortcake you told him back then. but what did happen is that you encountered a few familiar patients of zayne’s. they were all women who looked like they’re in their mid-sixties in a group of three. they were chatting nearby the entrance to zayne’s office when they spotted you.

and apparently, one of them recognized you.

“hello, dear. you’re the one who brings dr. zayne snacks, right? i remember seeing you here before.” she says, approaching you. “ah, yes! that would be me.” you let out a soft chuckle at her. “how kind of you to do so! are you perhaps his girlfriend?” another woman asks. the woman who approached you (who introduced herself as violet), shushes her friend. “don’t throw sudden questions at the lady! sorry about her, dear.”

the third woman in their group suddenly perks up and points at your hand. “look violet, her ring looks familiar... where have i seen it before, i wonder?” as soon as she said that, all three of the women’s attention was now all on your hand with the keyring on it. 

“isn’t that like the ring on dr. zayne’s hand?”

there was then a moment of silence before they all realized what that question meant. 

after escaping the clutches of their neverending queries (that you tried to answer as much as you could, and you never could’ve escaped without yvonne’s help of escorting them out), you finally got to knock on zayne’s office.

“come in.” his voice sounds muffled through the door.

once you settle down yourself inside, you let out a huge and relieved sigh. “was there a commotion outside? i heard multiple voices through the door, one of them being yours.” zayne asks.

“ah, well it turns out that your patients are really observant. did you know i had to make up some fake story on the spot of how we met?”

“is that so? do you mind telling me what this story is? they might ask about it the next time they come for a checkup.” he replies. 

the actual story of how you and zayne met wasn’t really that far off from the one you told the small group of old ladies. 

(it was dusk when you encountered zayne on the sidewalk; you accidentally bumped into him and he noticed you were seemingly in a rush. “oh my god, i’m so sorry! i wasn’t looking where i was running.” zayne waves his hand dismissively. “it’s alright, are you hurt?” 

“not at all—” you checked the time with your wrist watch. “crap! uhm, excuse me, sir. do you know if there’s a flower shop nearby here? i’m in a terrible need of dried flowers at the moment.” you ask him.

zayne thought about it for a moment, trying to recall if there is one. he then tells you the directions to the flower shop he has seen in the area and you immediately thanked him. “thank you, thank you so much! feel free to drop by the cozy oven. my treat for helping me! thank you again, kind sir!” you say before running off in the direction he told you.

that was first time you met him and you were sure that was also the first time he met you.

but what if it isn’t?)

“oh, you know, i just told them some silly old cliche where i bumped into you while holding two bouquets of flowers and decided to treat you to some coffee as an apology. nothing that out of the ordinary, really.”

“noted. they’ll probably ask me about which bouquet it was next time.” this time it was his turn to let out a sigh.

“oh yeah! one of my staff members said you visited the bakery last weekend. sorry, i was busy that time. my friend ordered a cake for this event and i was also invited to it so i had to leave the job of handling the bakery to my employees.” you told him. “it’s alright, don’t fret.”

that day ended with zayne offering you a ride home.

-

the next few times you and zayne were together after that, you swear something was changing.

you never thought zayne could be the touchy type; he grabs ahold of your hand, going as far as interlocking your fingers together. hell, he even puts his hand on your waist when you’re walking in public.

you knew what you were getting into when you both agreed on that deal. but it’s just so... strange. scary, if you think about it.

how is he so good at this? no, more like—

why does it feel so real?

zayne is an attractive man, and that was certainly a fact. smart, rich, handsome, and well-mannered—he’s even soft spoken for goodness sake! that man has got it all, which is no wonder why some of his patients would want to set up their daughter with him. any woman would be lucky to experience what it’s like to be loved by him.

but is this what it feels like?

perhaps.

that was all you could say—after all, this is all just a fake setup so you both could shoo away his patients.

yet if it was all fake, why were your faces suddenly so close to one another right now? your lips were close to brushing against each other; one small nudge and you’d find out what it was like to kiss zayne.

the sudden phone ring echoing somewhere in the room snaps the both of you out of it.

as you both pull away out of surprise, zayne picks up the phone. “this is zayne speaking.” he says.

you just sat there on his couch, wondering many things.

it’s just a fake stunt. don’t get sidetracked, (y/n).

but why is it that whenever you remind yourself that it is fake, an uncertain pang hits your chest? you never could tell zayne this; he might think you suddenly have a heart condition and be concerned (and you wouldn’t be surprised because he is someone who is under cardiology).

this could be nothing. no, scratch that; it is nothing. zayne is an impossible man to reach, and he is only a friend to you.

nothing more, nothing less.

-

the next time you visited zayne at akso hospital, you finally had a slice of strawberry shortcake stored safely in a box for him.

you were still distracted by the time you two almost kissed, but you couldn’t let zayne know that for obvious reasons.

at this point in your fake dating plan, his patients are all convinced that you both are together, finding it cute and squealing in awe when you see each other in the hallway where his office is located. you were surprised at how well you and zayne were pulling this off. 

“special delivery for dr. zayne?” you say, peeking through the door to check if he’s busy. “and what did i order this time?” he asks back. you take that as your cue to step inside. “one slice of a promised and long overdue strawberry shortcake!” you told him, setting down the small box and another plastic fork on top of the box.

“about time you remembered.” he says, taking the fork and opening the box. the familiar scent of strawberry shortcake then circulates around the two of you, which made zayne take a bite almost immediately. “are you planning on visiting the bakery this weekend?” you then ask him.

zayne swallows before he speaks. “i have thought about it, yes. and i was actually planning to ask you about your weekend plans today actually.”

“oh? why?”

“i was just wondering if you’d like to make plans with me since i’m usually off-duty during weekends.”

you become a bit awkward as soon as zayne says that. and zayne, being as observant as ever, obviously noticed it. “is there something wrong? it’s okay if you’re busy.” you waved your hands at him, “no, no! it’s not like that. well, kinda i guess? ugh, it’s just that…”

“i may or may not have agreed to go on a blind date this weekend.”

if zayne hadn’t listened that carefully, he would’ve missed it. but no, he caught every single word that slipped out of you. the sour taste of the sliced strawberry, along with the spongy texture of the cake, suddenly felt like sand in zayne’s mouth. and as ironic as that, he suddenly feels iffy as soon as you say that—like he was also sour. “is that so… that’s alright. you should enjoy your plans instead.”

“wait. you’re not mad?”

am i mad? zayne mentally asked himself. he doesn’t think he is, but he does somewhat feel disturbed by the idea of you going on a date with another man, and that doesn’t feel right to him either. “i’m not. why would i be mad?” a lie.

you stiffen at your seat, trying to come up with an explanation. that question just slipped off of your tongue; you didn’t mean to ask that. “well, uhm.. you know, because we’re in this fake dating thingy, i just thought it would be weird to you if i were to go see someone else and all that, yeah.”

“you said it yourself; this is all fake. so i’m not stopping you if you want to do that.”

ouch? why does his confirmation that it’s nothing serious get a kick to it? you thought. “really? okay then, thanks for letting me know.” 

zayne couldn’t shake off the sourness of the strawberry from his tongue. and the thing is—the strawberries that you use for your products aren’t even that sour. it was more sweet than sour in the first place. so why? why can’t he get the sourness off?

why does he suddenly feel so bitter at the thought of you seeing someone else?

the rest of the hour felt a bit suffocating after that.

FOUR: AS BLAND AS MISSING THE DELECTABLE TASTE OF YOUR COMPANY.

when the weekend rolled around, zayne didn’t visit your bakery. he didn’t find a need to because you weren’t there. he wasn’t close to your staff and he doesn’t really want to get close to them. and zayne isn’t that close with a lot of people in general, so he decided to spend his weekend at home.

he thinks about the conversation he had with you when you brought up the topic of having a blind date scheduled today.

and he still feels sour about that. he doesn’t know why. 

then he suddenly remembers the one time when he was so close to feeling your lips on his. zayne hoped that he wasn’t obvious but this moment had perhaps made him short circuit. your face was so close—he could take every little detail of your features with the distance.

but you just had to have this blind date today.

zayne feels even more sour after that.

he was a doctor, yes, but he obviously isn’t an expert in psychology or emotions. so as he unlocks his phone, he opens the web browser installed and types in the search bar.

now, jealousy was a foreign concept for zayne. 

he stares blankly at the results his search shows him, a part of him refusing to believe that what he was feeling was jealousy and the rational part of him telling himself that if this isn’t it, what else could it be?

but another question puts him in a dilemma. why is he even jealous in the first place? 

of course you can go see other people. he doesn’t have the right to be mad about that. zayne didn’t own you, and you didn’t own zayne. if he were in your position, you’d just let him go on that blind date.

yet the idea of you falling in love with another makes him uneasy.

oh.

oh.

zayne wasn’t stupid. he didn’t need to drown himself in any more thoughts on this matter to realize what was happening to him.

he was falling.

falling for you, to be specific.

and there’s nothing that could help him.

-

being forced into a blind date never goes well. and you swore that you'd strangle your friend who forced you into this in the first place.

“so, what do you do for a living?” your date asks before sipping from his glass of red wine. “oh, i’m a baker. i run a bakery, actually. it’s located nearby akso hospital.” 

“is that so? what do you usually bake?”

“i bake all sorts of things! from cakes to macarons—“ you pause when you say macarons. you suddenly recall the day when you asked zayne to taste test your new macaron flavor. you cleared your throat to regain composure.

“sorry about that; something just came to mind. but like i said, i bake a whole lot of cakes and pastries. i like to experiment with new flavors, you see. what about you?”

“oh, i’m currently a resident at akso hospital actually!” the man before you says. “really? under which department?” you ask him. “cardiology. i always found the heart a fascinating thing to study.”

you tried to hold yourself back from choking on your wine. “c-cardiology, you say…?” hearing the term come out of your date’s mouth has something uncomfortable bubbling up inside of you. your mind finds itself drifting back to zayne—

what am i even thinking? get a grip (y/n)! you’re on a date for fuck’s sake!

“mhm. one of my mentors is really nice, a bit cold but i know he’s just really like that. his name is dr. zayne, by the way.” and as if the universe is mocking you right now, your date just had to say that his mentor was zayne of all people.

“i think i’ve heard of him once or twice, yeah. he’s a good heart surgeon, right?”

as time seemed to pass by, you could feel yourself feeling more distracted. when the waiter came to ask if you’d like any dessert, your mind immediately thought of zayne.

while looking through the dessert menu, you wondered if zayne would like what this restaurant is offering. what would zayne’s opinion be on this? 

and your date continues to speak, the sole fact that he’s a resident under zayne, was enough to sidetrack your mind towards him. 

zayne, zayne, zayne. this whole date has done nothing but remind you of the doctor.

by the time the date was over, you entered the door to your apartment complex (which is located above your bakery) and slid against the door as soon as you closed it.

removing your heels as you were on the floor, you let out a sigh. “what the fuck is going on with me tonight?” you asked no one in particular.

the date wasn’t even bad but nothing about it felt right for you. like there was something clearly wrong with the whole principle of you going on a blind date in the first place but you didn’t know what it was.

you try to recall what happened before the blind date happened, trying to see if something would have triggered your current state.

your recollection brings you to the time you told zayne about the blind date a few days ago. 

something felt off about him when you dropped the bomb on him that time. it’s as if something shifted in the air when you revealed your plans for the weekend to him.

“oh, god. you have got to be kidding me.” you facepalmed when the realization dawned upon you.

your thoughts were running. how could’ve i been so stupid? it was written all over my face in the first place! i like zayne. holy shit i actually—

but it all stops there when you then realize what you just said. 

-

you didn’t visit zayne after your blind date. and when he visits your bakery, you hide yourself from him in the kitchen (and you also told your employees to not spill a word about your actual whereabouts, making them form excuses on what you’re up to). 

simply to say, you were avoiding zayne.

it scared you. you didn’t know what to do with your new feelings, especially when the whole fake dating thing was still ongoing for the both of you. 

how can you keep faking it all up when everything just feels so real? when you couldn’t help but wonder if you’re still friends after everything you’ve done?

zayne: Are you going to visit today?

zayne: I miss getting my special delivery.

you stared at his message, trying to process it. why did he have to say it like that? what does he mean by that? you thought.

(y/n): sorry, i can’t. 

(y/n): i need to prioritize some cake orders for now. maybe next time.

zayne: Oh, alright then.

you know full well that there most probably won’t be a next time. you’ll just keep denying and deflecting as much as you can—and as long as you can.

however, zayne knew you were avoiding him and he most definitely didn’t need to be a genius to notice that. 

but he doesn’t know why. was it something that he did? were you alright? perhaps you haven’t been feeling well as of late. were you overworking yourself lately?

zayne thinks about the time you two almost kissed again. maybe he should’ve gone for it. maybe he shouldn’t have answered that goddamn phone call. maybe—

maybe he shouldn’t have let you go on that blind date.

your phone vibrates against the pocket of your apron. you pull it out to check the notification and go blank at the sender.

zayne: Have you been well?

zayne: We haven’t seen each other lately.

his clinic hours are not the same as of late. zayne got so used to you visiting him at akso—to seeing you in general—that it just feels... bland now that you’re not present.

zayne misses you. and he wonders if you miss him too.

FIVE: AS SWEET AS KNOWING THAT I WASN’T TOO LATE.

(before you bumped into zayne on the sidewalk, you two had actually met.

once in a cafe, and once in the grocery store... zayne had noticed that since you two lived in the same community, it was bound that you’d encounter each other a lot—although you don’t really seem to notice him.

when zayne met you in the grocery store, the first thing that he noticed about you was that your shopping cart was halfway filled with baking ingredients. there were at least three (or was it four?) dozen of eggs stacked, two packs of all-purpose flour, a small bottle of sprinkles (both the colorful and chocolate ones), and a whole lot more.

at first glance, any other person would ignore you. zayne would be one of them—he had no clue why he noticed you and your shopping cart. he was only in the aisle because it’s the way to where the bread was located.

that was the first time zayne sees you.

the second time he saw you, zayne encountered you in a cafe this time. weeks passed since he saw you while he was out for groceries and you had papers sprawled all over the small table in front of you. zayne didn’t really get a good look at them but he assumed that it was all sorts of cake design from the single glance he got to have.

wedding cakes, birthday cakes, anniversary cakes. there were a whole bunch of designs. perhaps you baked for a living.

again, at first glance, any other person would ignore you. and zayne would still be one of them—though would this become a lie because isn’t it strange that it has happened twice? not like there’s anything bad with noticing you. it’s just... out of his character, per se.

the third time zayne meets you, it was the time you also recall—the encounter on the sidewalk. now, what were the chances that zayne would meet you there that late afternoon? he didn’t know. 

and with that small conversation between the two of you happening, zayne’s assumption was correct. the baking ingredients, the cake designs, and now you telling him to visit your bakery—

maybe he should visit the cozy oven during the weekend.)

around three weeks have passed since you started ignoring him. you were surprised at how well you were doing so far. not like it was hard doing so. the real challenge was to ignore his texts and make yourself reply late. 

and when he visits the bakery, which is what’s going on right now.

it was almost nine in the evening when you finished closing up your bakery. you heard footsteps getting louder, signaling that someone is walking towards you. 

“there you are.” you knew that voice anywhere.

“zayne? what are you doing here at this hour?” you ask him out of surprise. “well, a certain someone seems to be hiding from me, so i thought it was time to change my strategy and do a surprise attack. it looks like it worked.”

“ah. sorry about that... work has been a bit busy. you know?” you take in zayne’s appearance before you, eyes slightly widening at the keyring that is still on his finger.

(how ironic because you were also wearing yours at the moment. your excuse would be “it was out of pure habit.”)

“so busy that even when i visit you hide yourself from me?”

he got you there. “i—no, no! it’s just that—“ zayne cuts you off with another question. “did i do something wrong?”

“what?”

“you heard me. (y/n), did i do something wrong? i understand that you’ve been busy but something feels different. like there’s something more to it than just you being busy.” he then says. why does he have to be always so observant?

the guilt of your decisions as of late started to eat you up inside. “i… i don’t know.”

“you don’t know?” zayne asks again.

“i mean, it’s not like i literally don’t know but it’s just... did we even do the right thing? you know, fake date and all of that.”

zayne could feel the unease creeping up on him with your question. “the plan worked, did it not?”

“no, zayne. what i mean is that did we do the right thing with fake dating in the first place? because for the love of god, we almost kissed! and—and we’re both old enough to realize that friends don’t just... kiss.”

“is this about your blind date a few weeks ago?” you don’t know what he means by that. because you never met up again with that blind date, telling him that as much as it was nice to know him, you’re not really interested in giving romance a whirl for now. 

you didn’t know what to answer to that. “so it is.” he then says. you wanted to say no, but no words came out of you. it was as if your lips felt like they were sewn closed. “i guess i was too late then.”

too late?

“wait—what do you mean too late?”

zayne’s look in his eyes confused you. you couldn’t decipher the emotions that were present in his gaze. “aren’t you still seeing your blind date nowadays?”

then it all made sense to you.

zayne thinks the reason you started avoiding him was probably because he thought you hit it off with your blind date. before you could answer his question, he speaks again. “to be honest with you, recently, especially during your absence, i have come to the realization that i like you, (y/n).”

wait. what?

too speechless to cut in, he continues. “i felt off when you first said that you agreed to that blind date of yours. i just brushed it off back then but later i realized that it was because i was jealous. i soon regretted not doing anything about it—and when you started ignoring me, i couldn’t help but think that maybe you didn’t want to visit me anymore in my office as a sign of respect to your new lover.” in other words, i missed you.

you try to process everything that he just came clean about. but there is only one highlight in everything he said—he likes you. zayne likes you.

and you like him too.

“first of all, i’m really sorry for ignoring you, zayne. i honestly only did it out of fear because i recently realized that i like you too.” zayne was about to speak up when you raised a hand to shush him. “let me finish first. i never met with my blind date again after our first meeting. i told him that i kindly told him that i didn’t want to try romance for now—though that was partially a lie because i only find myself wanting to try romance out with you.”

zayne also only got one highlight out of that—you like him too. that’s all that matters to him.

“so i wasn’t too late?” he then asks.

you take a few steps closer to him. “no, zayne. you’re just in time.”  zayne’s hands find themselves on your waist. “then can i kiss you?” you shoot him a playful glare. “are you sure a phone call isn’t going to interrupt us this time?” you then say, arms wrapping themselves around his neck.

“i’m sure.”

“then you can.”

and without hesitation, zayne leans in to capture your lips with his. he could feel you smiling in the kiss, and zayne savors the faint taste of your lippie—not minding that it might have smudged on his lips now.

when you both pulled away, you couldn’t help but giggle. zayne’s lips were covered in some of your tinted lip gloss. you reach out a hand to smudge it away before pecking him a quick kiss to his nose and asking him, “do you want to come inside? i have a new macaron flavor for you to taste test.”

“is that so? what is it this time?” he replies, hands not leaving your waist.

“salted caramel! but not the ones that are sweet; i made sure that this one actually has a salty kick to it!”

zayne definitely has a sweet tooth.

yet there’s nothing more sweet than knowing that you like him too.

[karadin]

While you were sleeping ...

Federal judge puts back funding to USAID

Federal judge demands US put back health related federal websites

Judge Tanya Chutkan investigating Elon Musk's ability to run DOGE

The Department of Energy blocks firings of hundreds of employees who work for a key agency maintaining the U.S. nuclear weapons stockpile

Federal judge stops Trump from sending detainees to Cuba

Federal judge stops Trump from shutting down Consumer Protection Agency

DOGE now at CMS which covers Medicare, Medicaid, the Children's Health Insurance Program, and the Health Insurance Marketplace and are allied with Rachel Riley who worked at privatizing healthcare under Trump's first term.

Trump seeks to gut the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration and privatize the nation's weather reports and news

Judge blocks DOGE from sensitive Treasury Dept payment system, system being studied and re-programmed after DOGE invasion. expected to finish in August 25.

DOGE database on DOGE site found compromised, anyone can open and edit

Hundreds of federal workers illegally 'fired' from FEMA, DHS, CIS, CPA, the Coast Guard, USCIS, DHS' Science and Technology Directorate, the VA, Education and the US Forestry Service as well as half of the CDC Epidemic Intelligence Service, The Indian (Native American) Health Service. Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services and the National Institutes for Health, HUD and NOAA.

There have been illegal mass firings of 'probationary' federal employees, those who have just taken on jobs up to those who have were hired 2 years ago.

After seven prosecutors quit refusing to give a Trump deal to NYC mayor, prosecutors put into room and all told they would be fired unless a prosecutor signed off on the deal - Eric Adams case has been dropped and as a result, Adams is allowing Trump immigration to invade NYC.

Trump signs order to block funding for schools that mandate Covid vaccines

Trump has already captured funds to house the homeless in NYC that were disbursed by FEMA

Elon Musk has charged the US gov 16 million to hack at government departments so far.

Elon Musk was granted a 400million deal to sell the US gov cybertrucks

Elon Musk is now going after NASA, despite being a contractor for NASA, Trump says Musk will 'police' his own conflicts of interest.

Trump inserts himself into 'negotiations' between Russia and Ukraine, siding with Russia and not guaranteeing that Ukraine will return to pre-war borders.

Apparently at negotiations, US handed President Zelenskyy a note (mafia style) seeking half of Ukraine's mineral rights, which Zelenskyy refused to acknowlege.

at Munich Security Conference VP Vance pushes the right-wing in Europe, shocking and angering NATO allies, changing US policy towards Putin and China. Trump now says there is no US intent to 'beat China'.

FAKE DOGE 'employees' appear in San Francisco city hall demanding access to state systems and data, leaving when confronted.

Trump makes himself head of the Kennedy Center for the Arts many staff resign and many artist pull out of sold-out shows.

[exitrowiron]

My DEI Experience

The very public cancelations of DEI programs got me thinking about my experience as the Executive Sponsor of a DEI program at a major global software company a few years ago.

There were several DEI groups (ex. LGBTQ, Pan-Asians, Blacks, etc.) and I was sponsor for the Black group. It was an enlightening experience for me and I'm proud that I helped many members secure interviews for internal positions and several were promoted.

My company's DEI program didn't have any hiring quotas, instead it was more of a networking and training opportunity for DEI members to share their experiences, learn some new skills and get exposure to sr. executives and hopefully secure the executive's support and encouragement.

As the sponsor of the DEI program, I couldn't help but acknowledge the advantages I'd enjoyed throughout my career as a tall white-guy, with similar tall white-guy professionals as family members. When graduating from Indiana University in 1989, I went to work at Price Waterhouse in St. Louis, the same office my Dad worked at when he graduated from college 25 years prior. I met all the hiring criteria (GPA, interviews etc.) and passed the CPA exam, etc. so the decision to hire me wasn't a favor to my Dad, but it certainly didn't hurt that a few of the partners knew my name and if nothing else, I didn't have imposter syndrome. My Dad had done this job and nearly everyone else doing the job looked like me as did almost everyone in sr. mgt.

My second job was with a company that employed my father-in-law. I don't think that influenced the decision to hire me, but it certainly didn't hurt. At this second company I entered the industry where I spent my career, much of it working for a guy who had attended my wedding as a guest of my in-laws. I'm confident that any of my colleagues would agree that I excelled in my various roles, but having those initial personal connections didn't hurt and there were other candidates and colleagues without the benefit of my network by birth and marriage. Through it all, I recognize that I looked like the hiring manager and the last person to have the job I was seeking.

One of the most enriching aspects of my DEI experience was gaining an understanding of how being a minority introduces an entirely new suite of uncertainties. On the rare occasion I received a less than stellar performance review or was passed over for a promotion, I never considered that my race/gender/sexual orientation might be the reason. But the conversations with my DEI colleagues confirmed that this is ALWAYS in the back of their mind, especially working for an overwhelmingly white company. Every colleague could cite examples of overt, incontrovertible racism they'd experienced (not necessarily at the company) which had made them question whether quiet racism was influencing their experience at our company. For example, was their supervisor just generally a jerk, or was the supervisor especially unpleasant to the employee because of her race, gender, etc.? If you've been on the receiving end of maltreatment, it can be difficult to be objective.

My role as the DEI sponsor was pretty straightforward. I did basic things like help critique resumes and provide interview coaching. I encouraged the candidates to overcome their imposter syndrome and apply for aspirational positions. Most importantly, I tried to be the networking resource they lacked. I sent notes and arranged brief phone calls with hiring managers to introduce the candidate. I was very careful not to inadvertently pressure the hiring manager (I know that just receiving an email from me created anxiety). I simply asked that the hiring manager/interviewer give the candidate an interview. I'm proud that my DEI group experienced above-average promotion velocity in the company.

Americans love to celebrate the 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps' story and white males especially want to believe that they are self made men. DEI programs can be challenging for guys like me because it can cause introspection which is humbling. It requires a person to acknowledge that maybe, just maybe you had some help along the way or at a minimum, you didn't face the external and internal obstacles of other candidates who may have been just as smart and capable. It is humbling to admit that at the very least, you benefitted from the fact that you looked like the last person who did the job; that's why I think white males are so intent on dismantling DEI programs.

[archelangeli]

accrued interest. | hinata s.

ACCOUNT HOLDER: an introduction to academic victims

hinata shoyo

first-year marketing student. the wheel of names chose his program for him because he was indecisive, but he ended up liking marketing. while he’s not the brightest, his enthusiasm and determination definitely make up for it. however, the practical aspect of their accounting subject has him in tears lately, and he blames their rarely present professor for having the audacity to give assignments. procrastinates a lot and would cram with others in the group call.

kozume kenma

second-year marketing student. supposed to be busy with marketing research but often hops on his computer to go gaming instead. he still manages to pass his classes with minimal effort. roommates with hinata, and since they’re in the same program, hinata got notes from him for most subjects. kenma couldn’t help him with accounting, though. he dealt with the same professor last year and forgot the lessons in that subject since that professor had more absences than attendance.

nishinoya yu

second-year communication student. tourism management was his first choice but due to the height requirements in the program, he wasn't qualified and ended up in communication instead. the incident has been a running joke in the group chat ever since. a menace. the biggest yapper ever and the only thing that shuts him up are tight deadlines. talks a lot during group calls where the everyone is doing homework only then to be told to shut up by an annoyed tsukishima.

yachi hitoka

first-year interior design student. she is the one that balances out the chaos in the group but sometimes, she needs a little saving from them. the biggest sweetheart ever and the go-to person for advice or a listening ear. her talent for designing spaces and creating beautiful layouts makes her a standout in her program, but her shy nature often leads her to second-guess herself.

yamaguchi tadashi

first-year architecture student. sleep-deprived because he always pulls all-nighters to finish his plates. he is often found sleeping in the oddest places, in any uncomfortable position, and through any noise. although architecture is stressful most of the time, he’s still having fun with it. just don’t ask him how much coffee he consumes in a day. roommates with kageyama and tsukishima, who are firsthand witnesses of his suffering.

kageyama tobio

first-year sports science student. currently waiting for the intramurals sports since he has a clear goal getting into the university volleyball team. he never hesitates to speak what's on his mind and call anyone out, especially if that person happens to be hinata. a lot of people are intimidated by him, but he actually just doesn't know how to function properly in social settings.

tsukishima kei

previously featured in CPA (can't pass accounting).

previous transaction. | masterlist. | next transaction.

[broz0neglitters]

Dating Clay ˚ ༘♡ 📗⋆｡ ˚ ❀

Warning: Smut/NSFW!

⚠️(Also I will be using words like dick,cock and Other stuff so if you're uncomfortable with those words you click away once you finish reading dating clay part I don’t know any other word for those again this blog/headcanon is for mature audience so yeah just giving you all a heads up!) ⚠️

Anyway, This is my first Smut I'll include the dating part, too as well before we get to the spicy part I hope you guys enjoy this, and please excuse any mistake I have made

-Also, I don't know the difference between Smut and NSFW. I'm assuming they are the same thing; gosh, I'm so dumb-

Dating Clay: •~•°.🐢

-Since he's a licensed CPA, He will rarely have time for you but he'll still make an effort to spend time with you -You guys first date is basically sitting around watching him do his work and talking most of the time is completely quiet b/c he's working -Your 2nd date will be more like a mini picnic, but of course, Viva interrupts you two; you tell her that you and Clay were in the middle of a date, and she apologizes and leaves and won't do it again unless it is a real emergency -He isn't a big PDA Guy. He will link arms/pinky with you, but sooner enough, he'll even let you hold his hands, even just a kiss on the cheek he rather have PDA In private cause he's a serious boy Clay -When you're sad/angry he would usally avoid making eye contact with you and he would leave you alone until you're ready to vent to him -When you vent to him he will take notes to make sure he doesn't trigger you or upset you ever again

-He will be fun boy clay when his brother aren’t around or in private -he will sing you all of his part in brozone and give you a mini concert -you even wore his romper sweater that one time b/c you want to match with him he will think you look silly but he thinks you look very cute -That dude can bake you anything you like from cake to cookie you name it -He's not a big sweet tooth kinda guy but he will definitely have some milkshake or sweet with you because it makes you happy

-He will definitely take you to his sad book club when he crys he will be hugging you super tight while you pat his hair -He's a super tall troll so do expect him to put his arm or hand on your hair and he will definitely asked you "How's the weather down there?" -He's over protective of you he will stand close to you at all cost to the point the trolls mistaken clay as your bodyguard -He's not big on nickname that's a different story *wink wink* but the only nickname he has for you is babe or short stuff

-He too shy to say "I love you." to you but the ways he shows it is hugs and kisses privately but overtime his shynesses goes e away and he says it with full confidence

-------------------

(Okay now onto the spicy Part again I've mention I'll mention some uncomfortable words but I'll try to find a different way to say it anyways again this is 18+ so DNI If you're a minor click away after you read dating clay part or just click away in general I'll do a non-Smut version!)

----------------------

Clay Smut/NSFW: 💚💐💋

-He will take it slow on your first time -During the first time he will dry hump you which makes you turn on -He likes touching your lady part when you're doing dishes etc he even attempted to rub it to see you moan or see if you can keep a straight face -he once rubs your lady part while you were cutting vegetables you almost cut yourself because you couldn't hold it in because of how good it felt when he was fingering you... -He likes it when you beg for him -He's big on nickname once it comes to sex He'll called you Sexy,Baby,Mama and Bitch (He dosen't mean it as a bad way it just his thing when you guys do the deeds) -He will go to town on you like literally he's a rough fucker -His cock is thin and long -when putting his cock into your lady parts he will say thing like "Stay still.. I'm almost done" "mm.. u Feel good ma" etc. -While he's fucking you he will make you moan out his name no matter what he isn't worry if anyone could hear you moan his name he wants everyone to know who his little bitch is when going to town on you

"What's my name mamas?" "Say it louder, say it you mean it moan out my name babygirl.","I can't hear you let me hear you beautiful."

-He loves it when you suck him off -He loves cockwarming so do expect him to ask you to cockwarm espically when he's working -He will most likey fuck you in front of john dory cuz that amazon box ass hole was telling clay that he couldn't go to town on you so clay will prove it to John dory -He's a rough finger fucker he will finger you really roughly but he goes slow on your first time -Usually clay will dominate you during sex but he'll let you dominate him sometimes -He will leaves a bunch of hickeys on your thighs and lady parts

-He will cum all over your hot body,mouth,face he will even cum inside you if you let him his cum is super thick

-----------------

Anyways I hope you enjoyed my first clay smut anyways I'll do more clay smut soon eventually anyways this was just a introduction anyways I hope I did well 🤭

Like and Follow are very much appreciated ᯓ★

[bloggin-til-cpa]

Had my iPad’s Notes App crash and caused me to lose written notes in addition to heating up so it was no longer comfortable to continue writing on my iPad. Decided to look into it and found out it was a bug with the iPad and that others are experiencing the same issue.

Downloaded Notability to try out. I like it!!! Just don’t like having to pay for an app or else be subject to a usage limit 🥹 discount codes are appreciated! Lol

[jtl-fics]

Time After Time:

Math Nerd AU

May 19th, 2020 (in the past future [before the reincarnation])

Math Nerd AU | Unusual Fic Asks

Neil was coming to accept that he wasn't going to die of old age as the doctors told him the recovery time for his twisted knee. He would need to do physical therapy before he could even have the surgery and then additional physical therapy afterwards.

It would take too long.

The Moriyamas would cut him as a useless thread. "Mr. Josten, you'll play again." The Doctor assures, "You will just-"

"Thank you Doctor, yes I understand." Neil interrupts. "Let's schedule a time to start the physical therapy." he says because a part of him feels spiteful. He knows how Ichirou works, knows that his death will look like a suicide.

People who are committing suicide don't make plans right? Maybe his death would be just enough to topple it all to the ground and save Kevin and Jean. He makes his appointment and hobbles out of his doctor's appointment to find Andrew in the waiting room.

He wonders how much longer he'll get to look at him.

He'll never actually be ready to stop.

Andrew's gaze snaps to him and Andrew has always been able to read him like a book. "It's too long?" he asks.

Neil laughs because, as usual, there was no point in hiding things from Andrew. "I've had my will ready for a while. I'm leaving-"

"Stop." Andrew raises his hand, "you aren't dying. Not before me. I'm older." Andrew argues.

Neil smiles and wishes to say the three words that bubble up in him but he wants them to be the last ones he says to Andrew if he can manage it. Saying them now would only make Andrew upset and possibly leave.

"Let's go home. I wanna see the cats." he says instead. It doesn't matter too much, his will spells out where everything is supposed to go. Andrew helps him into the car and puts his crutches in the backseat. They drive in silence and Neil finds himself looking at every black car with out of state licenses.

He looks at his phone because there's no point in worrying. His fate was sealed the moment that Ohio player rammed into him. He hopes Andrew likes one of the options he listed in his will. He hopes he stays close to Andrew, hopes he can protect him from beyond.

He prepares texts for all of his friends as he goes. Most are just I love yous and some thanking them for being especially kind to him. His text to Matt a long note on how sorry he is that he won't get to watch his god daughter grow up. His note to Aaron to make sure that his daughters take after Katelyn when they're born.

They get home and Neil is glad to see that there are no cars in their driveway. It does not mean that Ichirou isn't there, but it gives him a bit more time to look at Andrew.

Andrew's jaw is tight as he pulled into their garage.

"I've had arrangements made and paid for Andrew. It's going-"

"Shut up." Andrew hisses and gets out of the car.

Neil's phone rings and he sees a familiar area code he looks as Andrew shuts the door as he enters the house.

He hits accept. 32 wasn't bad considering he never expected 20.

"Hello?" he asks.

"Wesninski." Ichirou greets and Neil lets his eyes close. "I hear you will not be able to pay me." he comments.

"It will be quite some time before I can work on the court again My Lord." he doesn't lie or try to hide it. "I understand what this means for our deal. May I-"

"I wish to strike a different deal." Ichirou interrupts and Neil blinks.

"You...wish to strike a different deal?" he asks.

"I am in need of someone with your certifications Wesninski." Ichirou says.

Neil's jaw tenses. He can't do his father's work. He'd rather just have Ichirou shoot him and let it be done.

"You have kept up to date with your CPA certification from what I understand?" Ichirou continues.

Neil blinks.

What?

[anamelessfool]

Scenes from the Void AU Ages and Timelines Masterpost

Note, this is my AU. Ages and years are different. Also they're Americans. Why? Rule of cool, bro🤘

Primo

b. 1953 New York City d. 2001 Ministry HQ

Irving Robert Olson Parents: Nance and Nihil

Left the Church in 1960 with Nance, returned after her death in 1972.

Bodyguard for Mater Emeritus Jocasta 1972-1979, Groundskeeper/Super for Ministry HQ until elevation

Papa Emeritus: 1994-2000, died from exhaustion caused from the Papa Emeritus Curse

Secondo

b. 1961 Ministry HQ

Michael Aulenbach changed to Michael Leider in 2008 Parents: Rebecca and Nihil

Rebecca passed over for a promotion to Mother Imperator due to her surprise pregnancy (the magic ritual would kill the fetus)

Child prodigy pianist. Tours eastern United States as "Modern Mozart" from the ages of 6 to 10. Piano teacher to this day.

Magician of the Church 1977-2008. Head of the Conclave of Magicians 1990-1999. Papa Emeritus II 2001-2008.

Married Sandra Leider in 2006. Three children Paul (2004), Eden (2010) and Samuel (2013). Left the church in 2008 to help Sandra's family run the Leider Memorial Home. Funeral Director.

Terzo

b. 1965 Milan Ministry location d. March 2018 Ministry HQ

Arsenio Moretti Parents: Nihil and a Catholic novitiate only known as "Maria"

Fathered during Nihil's first major tour of Italy. Mother died and so he was returned to Nihil in the US in 1969.

1984 Last seen at Bishop Camino's funeral in NYC. Missing for two years, returned to Ministry in 1986 and never speaks about it to anyone (except Omega eventually) Now has photography and filmmaking skills.

Director of promotional materials, films Primo's tours 1994-2000. Elevated to Cardinal in 1998. Choir Director until his elevation to Papa Elect in 2004.

Summons Omega in 2005.

Papa Emeritus III 2008-2017. Forcibly removed from office 2017 for [REASONS REDACTED].

First Papa Emeritus formally executed by the Church in 300 years for the crimes of [REDACTED]. (you will have to read hehehe)

Copia

b. 1976???? Unknown

Copia is his real name. Unknown origin. Unknown parents, although raised as prev characters' youngest brother.

Found by Primo in mysterious circumstances in 1979. Parental figure found murdered. (My fic Violence and Gentleness focuses on this mystery)

Raised primarily by Primo. Homeschooled by Rebecca until 13. Secondo is his piano teacher.

He had a very strong bond with both Primo and Secundo and considers them father figures. Primo taught him how to be a moral person and Secondo taught him how to be an intelligent person. Secondo started teaching him piano at the age of five and by fifteen he was learning on the organ.He had an interest in math and science and pursued that at the academic level. He was the first of the family to actually go to a college outside of the Ministry. He graduated top of his class as a CPA in 1997, and immediately began working under the Head Treasurer. He was head treasurer for the Ministry from 2005-2017.

Met Cardinal Marian in 2006 was in a relationship with her until 2017, then back again in 2019.

Elevation to Cardinal 2010. Elevation to Papa Elect 2012. Finally Papa Emeritus upon Nihil's death in 2019.

Nihil

b. 1930 Milwaukee, WI d. 2019 onstage Mexico City

Robert Irving Olson Parents: Betty and Irving

Father gambler and alcoholic. Mother church organist. Church choir and guitarist. Older brother Archie lost at sea in 1946 (WWII Navy). Forced to drop out of school and work to support family in machine shop. Ran away from home in 1947. Rode the rails with the nickname "Zero". Picked up by the Satanic Church of the Void in NYC 1950. Multi-instrumentalist in Bishop Camino's house band until 1958. Odd jobs all throughout his life from taxicab driver, singing telegram, model, busker, roadie, trucker, etc.

Transferred to Ministry HQ thru Bishop Camino's recommendation. Brought Nance and Primo with him. Affair with Rebecca led to Secondo's birth and Nance leaving the church altogether. Elevated to Papa Emeritus 1963. First American Papa since Papa Camino in 1940s. Sister Imperator 's first Construct (after she underwent her magical rite she bestowed on him the Curse to make him Papa). Toured Italy and Europe 1964-1965. Secret bastard child Terzo discovered in 1969.

Got his ghouls terminally addicted to slot machines in 1972, foisted from position for that mistake. Protegee Jocasta took over until 1979.

Personal Assistant to Sister Imperator 1972-1984. Leader of the College of Cardinals 1986-2017. Return to Papa Emeritus 2017-2019.

[heckcareoxytwit]

The mutants of Krakoa are sent on their mission to investigate who is behind the terrorist attack and they help the survivors of the bombed city. Also, they fend off the Watchdogs who are harassing the mutants and survivors.

The mutants who do things in this comic are...

Storm disperses the biotoxic gas in the air and she helps out in fending off the Watchdogs. She also creates an oxygen-rich bubble environment to enhance Triage's healing powers.

Cyclops and Monet St Croix do most of the fighting in fending off the Watchdogs who are harassing the mutants.

Bishop helps out the survivors as well as fending off the Watchdogs.

Cerebra and Tempo analyze the skull and they found out that the skull belonged to a young mutant who was kidnapped and used as a living weapon by Orchis.

Thunderbird frees the trapped man inside the car, he also knows that the Heritage Foundation might have something to do with the X-Gene used to create the exploding mutant so he informs the CSI team that they were buying native X-Genes.

Iceman creates ice bowls for the dogs to drink water out of. He also uses his ice golems to do CPA stuff in the office, helping the town prepare for upcoming bureaucratic and budgetary battles.

Triage works to heal the critically injured and notes that half the town is sick or infectious due to the "dirty bomb" explosion.

Tag's powers are great for evacuation and he "tags" destroyed cars and buildings to help people escape them, while Karma telepathically guides people out of complexes.

Angel helps out in not only taking the trapped survivors out of the window from the building, he also helps out Cyclops, Monet, Bishop, Jean Grey and Bishop in fending off the Watchdogs.

Jean Grey ends up her telekinesis levitating most of the Watchdogs and after reading their minds realizes they're not part of the false flag operation. They actually believe mutants are responsible for the attack. She gets them out of the way and has them "chasing their own tails." Jean Grey also rebuilds people's homes using their memories as blueprints.

Somnus keeps the wounded but stable victims dreaming comfortably as they rest.

Thumbelina uses her shrinking powers to perform microsurgeries inside the survivors' bodies.

Wicked the Genoshan mutant connects the deceased with their loved ones as grief counseling. Bishop notes that without backups of these people the Phoenix Foundation can't bring them back.

Icarus singing local tunes to lift the hearts of the victims.

Escapade switching places with trapped people as she seems good at escaping.

Crave the random mutant eats the contents of biohazard bags that have been collected, neutralizing them. He also finds them delicious.

Northstar and Aurora light up the night sky.

Sanjar Javeed (Horseman Death from Remender's Uncanny X-Force) boosts the immune systems of the most vulnerable.

Brutha Nature grows air-scrubbing flora all over town.

Alchemist (Sudi Abadi) purifies the contaminated water.

Theia also helps to reassemble the streets, businesses, etc.

Greycrow cooks a massive pot of seafood boil while Madrox fills and passes out bowls.

Eye-Scream the obscure mutant makes ice cream for the children.

Hindsight uses his telemetry to do more investigations.

--- X-Men: Before the Fall - Mutant First Strike #1, 2023

Whew! What a list!

[togrowoldinv]

Memory

Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader

You feel like you’ve met her before, but you just can’t remember when or how. It turns out there’s a lot you don’t remember

Note: Hey y’all. I have been swamped these last couple of weeks studying for and taking a part of the cpa exam, but I finally had a free moment to have some fun. I went and saw Argylle, so this is loosely inspired by that. Enjoy it!

Natasha Masterlist 1, Natasha Masterlist 2, Natasha Masterlist 3, Main Masterlist

The room is silent aside from the clicks of a keyboard as Natasha tries to break through a firewall. She’s smart, but the person who created it is slightly smarter than her.

The redhead smirks when she is one step from breaking through, but her cheekiness doesn’t last. An alarm sounds and she’s met with at least ten agents swarming all around her.

“Oh hey, guess you guys found the party,” she says in her usual cool under pressure tone.

She uses the agents’ hesitation to begin attacking them to deal the first blows. She takes them down two at a time until there’s only one left. She knows who he is.

“Are we going to do this the easy way or the hard way?” Natasha asks.

“You know what I want,” he says.

“And you know what I want,” Nat replies.

The two of them keep their guns in ready position. Nat alerted for backup, but she knows most likely she’ll have to handle this on her own.

“Where is the woman?” The man asks. He shakes his gun at Nat. She sees a weakness in the way he’s holding it. He won’t last.

“If you give me the intel, I’ll give you her location,” Nat says.

“You’re lying!”

“Maybe. Or maybe I’m telling you the truth. They’re never really that different, right?”

“Drop your weapon,” he tries another tactic.

Natasha just smirks. She moves her left arm down and the man mistakenly thinks she’s giving in. The moment he shifts his aim Nat takes a shot at him. It’s an easy shot for her.

He goes down and Nat finishes gathering her data from the computer before she quickly gets out of the building. That backup she was waiting for finally arrives as she’s making her way outside.

“Thanks for the help,” she says sarcastically as Steve opens the door for her.

“Sorry,” he says. “We can’t be everywhere all the time. What were you even doing here?”

“Gathering intel,” Nat says simply. She shows him the flash drive and he just shakes his head. “The more I can find out the better I can help her, Steve. It’s an easy choice to make.”

“Nat, she’s so far gone,” he tries. “It might be worth stopping.”

“I’ll never give up on her. She’ll be herself again. I know it,” Natasha says. “Now, will you help me get this to Stark to decode?”

“Of course I’ll help you, Romanoff.”

She nods in thanks. For the rest of the drive, Natasha thinks about what her next step should be. There’s no easy fix to this situation. She needs to go where her mind works best.

Meanwhile, you are working on cleaning tables when the most beautiful woman walks in. You’ve seen her in here several times since you started working here.

She always sits at the table in the corner and orders coffee and a piece of chocolate pie. It’s always the same thing. You’ve never waited on her before, but somehow the stars align today and you’re covering that section.

You walk to her table and take a deep breath. She’s even more beautiful from this close up.

“Hey, how are you today?” You ask her.

“I’m okay,” she replies. “How are you?”

“Can’t complain,” you say. It’s your typical response when a customer asks you that question. “What can I get for you, ma’am?”

She orders her usual. You feel her eyes linger on you as you pour the coffee and bring her slice of pie to the table.

Something feels familiar about the way she smiles at you in thanks.

“Do I know you?” You ask her. She doesn’t reply, but you notice she looks away from you. “Sorry, it’s just that I had some memory loss so I’m just not quite sure who I know at this point.”

“Oh, I’m very sorry,” she says. “I don’t think we know each other though, no.”

“You seem familiar,” you tell her.

“Well, I am an Avenger so maybe that’s it,” she says. “I’m Natasha.”

“Right. The superheroes. It’s nice to meet you, Natasha,” you say. “I’m y/n.”

You hold out your hand for her to shake. When she does, you swear there’s still a lingering feeling that you know her. Maybe you’ve just seen her on television.

“I better get back to work,” you say.

“Nice to meet you, y/n,” Natasha says.

She stands from her chair and drops cash on the table. Walking towards the door, she stops short and turns back to look at you. You offer her a smile that she returns.

With that, she disappears into the city. The rest of the day goes by seemingly without any other excitement. You can’t stop thinking about your interaction with the woman, which is why you thought you were dreaming when she shows up at your door.

You blink hard to try and wake up, but the reality is that she’s truly here.

“Natasha?” You ask confusedly.

“I don’t have time to explain,” she says. “Can I come in?”

“I- what? Okay?”

She takes that as a yes. She walks inside and goes straight to the corner of the room where she picks up a piece of the floor to reveal a secret storage area.

Natasha fills her bag with the weapons that were stored under the floor.

“What is happening?” You ask her.

“Just trust me,” Nat says.

“I just met you today and you somehow know about this secret area of my house I didn’t even know about. And I’m supposed to trust you?”

“Yes,” Natasha replies. “Come on. Get some shoes on. We have two minutes.”

“Two minutes before what?”

She doesn’t get the chance to answer before a loud bang comes from outside. A series of car doors close simultaneously.

“Look, I know you don’t know me but you have to trust me. These guys are after you and if we don’t bail in the next thirty seconds we’re dead. Got it?” Natasha says.

“What?” You ask. It seems to be the only word in your vocabulary right now.

She grabs your hand and pulls you through your house. Once you’re outside, you go through the fence to the neighbors yard.

“Here,” Nat says, pulling you to a motorcycle that’s waiting there.

“I am not riding on that,” you say.

“Then you’ll be dead within minutes. Come on, y/n,” Nat says. She puts the helmet on your head involuntarily.

You have no choice but to listen to her. Hopping onto the bike, you hold on tight to her middle as she drives through the streets. At some point, a van is tailing the two of you. Natasha turns down every alleyway and street she can to get you away from the tail.

“When I say jump, you’ve got to jump!” Nat says over the roar of the engine.

“What?”

You’re quickly approaching a road that you can see has no end. She drives full speed ahead before letting go of the handlebars.

“Jump!” Nat shouts.

You cling onto her as you both jump. You have no idea how far the drop is but somehow you land in water. Natasha pulls you to the surface quickly.

You get to shore and try to gather yourself some. You’re so confused about all of this.

“Are you okay?” She asks.

“Am I okay?” You ask her. “Seriously, you’re asking me that? I don’t know who you are or what’s happening. We just got chased by a van through town and jumped off a motorcycle into a fucking lake. Do you think I’m okay?”

The woman has the audacity to smile at your words.

“I’m sorry, do you think this is funny?” You ask her, feeling fury seethe inside you.

“No,” Natasha says too quickly. “No, it’s just- nevermind. We have to get to the Avenger’s compound.”

“I’m not going anywhere with you,” you tell her matter of factly.

“Y/n-“

“Don’t!” You interrupt her. “Just leave me alone.”

Nat raises her hands in surrender and watches as you walk away. She lets you get ten steps ahead before she follows after you.

“I told you to let me be.”

“You’re up there all alone. I just happen to be walking in the same direction,” Natasha reasons. “Although, the compound is the other way.”

Despite the fact that you were just doing insanely dangerous tasks with her, you feel a certain safety in her presence.

“Why should I go with you?” You pose a question.

You notice her hesitation in answering. Like she wants to tell you something but she just can’t.

“If you just come with me, I’ll explain everything there. Okay? Please give me a chance,” Nat says. “I won’t be responsible for them finding you and finishing the job.”

“What job? I’m just a waitress. Who could I possibly have wronged?”

“I promise I’ll explain later,” Nat says. “Please follow me.”

You relent and follow her. There’s no reason for you to trust her but somehow you do. It doesn’t take long to get to the compound once Nat hot wires a car.

“Y/n?” A girl asks when you are inside. You look at her despondently and she frowns. Natasha gives he’s her a look.

You follow Natasha to what seems to be a laboratory. There’s a large screen on the wall.

“Ah welcome,” a man says. You recognize him as Iron Man. “You’re just in time.”

“For?” You ask.

“The truth,” another man answers. You’re pretty sure he’s Captain America.

Before you can speak again, photos of you litter the screen. There are some of just you and some of you and the other Avengers.

“What the hell?” You wonder aloud.

“Y/n, we wanted you to remember on your own but it’s taking too long,” Tony Stark explains. “Natasha tried to jog your memory just by being in your presence, but that didn’t work.”

“So I do know you?” You ask the woman.

“You know all of us, y/n. You’re an Avenger.”

“But I’m- no. I’m a waitress,” you say. Your head feels like it’s spinning.

“That’s what they made you think, but you’re not. You’re a special agent,” Steve says. “And one of the best.”

“I don’t believe you. This is all a joke, right?”

“It’s not a joke, y/n. Why do you think we knew those people were after you? Or that I knew about the floor in your house?” Natasha asks.

“That’s easy. You’ve been spying on me.”

“No,” she says simply.

“Then how?” No response. “This is just insane. I’m leaving.”

You start to walk away. You hear Natasha’s footsteps behind you.

“Natasha,” a warning voice comes from Tony. “Don’t.”

“You know what, you go ahead. Take a car of ours, y/n,” she says.

She holds up a pair of keys. You reach for them, but instead of giving them to you she throws a punch your way.

You surprisingly dodge it with ease. Natasha smirks at the way you look at your arms in confusion.

“How did I do that?”

“Come on, throw one,” she taunts you.

You do your best to punch her, but of course she dodges it. You spar back and forth until you’ve both had enough.

“Great, now that that’s over. Do you believe us?” Tony asks.

“I’m not sure,” you say. “How could I not know I’m an agent?”

“Brainwashing,” Natasha answers. “Very effective brainwashing.”

“But why?”

“Because you were going to uncover a huge invasion of Hydra in the government,” Steve explains. “We still can’t find the data that you had before they took it from you and erased all of your memories.”

“So the memory loss, that was a real feeling I was having?”

“It was,” Nat says. “The reason why wasn’t a car accident as they told you though. They captured you and essentially knocked you senseless.”

You rub your hands over your face as you try to take all of this in. Just a few hours ago you thought you knew who you were, but they’re telling you something completely different.

“We wanted you to remember on your own, so it might not be so overwhelming,” Nat says.

“So, we’re all what? Coworkers? Friends? I don’t remember any of you, or anything you’re describing,” you say.

“We’re friends,” Steve says. “You’re friends with all of us and with Nat-“

“Steve,” Nat interrupts. “She doesn’t need to hear that right now.”

“I don’t need to hear what?”

There are shouts down the hallway that interrupt your conversation. Tony suits up and Steve grabs his shield.

“Get her to safety,” he tells Nat.

She grabs your hand and takes you down the hallway to a door and down a ton of stairs. Nat locks a door behind her once you’ve reached the lowest level.

“They’ll handle them,” Nat says. “But the further you are from the fight the better.”

“What was Steve going to say?”

“Hm?”

“About you and me,” you prompt her.

Natasha tears her eyes from yours much the same way she did when you questioned if you knew her earlier.

“Natasha, please just tell me. Clearly, everything I thought I knew was a lie. What’s one more thing?”

“Okay,” she agrees. “We were- you and I were together.”

“Together?”

She nods.

“Define together. Like dating?”

“Kind of yeah,” she says. You look at her for more details. The silence prompts her to continue. “We were married. We are technically married.”

“Oh,” you say.

“Yeah. I didn’t think you were ready to learn that,” Nat says.

“So that’s why you knew your way around my place?”

“Our place,” she says. “But they moved all of my stuff out before you went back there.”

“Natasha, I don’t- I can’t remember anything,” you say.

“I know,” Nat says sadly. “We kept our distance once we realized what they did to you, but we’ve never stopped making sure you were safe.”

You hear the sound of the fight getting closer. Natasha reaches for your hand. She places a loaded gun in your palm.

“I want to remember.”

“You will,” Nat says. “But right now, you’ve got to fight.”

To be continued…

[the-sentimental-spymaster]

Shadowy Grinding

Okay. I've heard a lot of things about Shadowy being really hard to grind or being a stat that lags behind. I've also seen some recommendations for grinds that top out at ~3 CP per action, which is worse than finding a menace free check and using a Weasel of Woe.

With the help of my good friend @adorablegorilla, I learned of a much more efficient grind - and, as it happens, it uses Watchful!

TL:DR - 16+ CPA Shadowy grind at peak efficiency

Requirements:

150 Watchful for 100% on checks.

17 Palimpest Scraps per run through, maximum. You can use fewer based on an Airs style randomness.

Access to Moloch Street and Spelunking in the Sunken Embassy.

Access to the Dome of Scales, Occupied.

This is most efficient when done in multiples of four, but is generally more efficient at higher repetitions.

Instructions:

Spelunking in the Sunken Embassy, use the Consult Scholarly Tomes action (unless Locate an Inner Sanctum is available, in which case use that), get up to 600 Fragments and turn them in for an Oneiromantic Revelation.

Turn the Oneiromantic Revelation into 5 Vitreous Almanacs, which you can then turn-in 4 of for 275 Shadowy CP at the Dome of Scales.

Analysis:

If you have 150+ Watchful, this takes 20 actions to generate 5 almanacs. After four runs through (80 actions), you can turn in 5 times, getting 1375 Shadowy CP over 85 actions total.

This calculates out to 16.176 CP per action, and 19.6 levels (once you're above level 70) over four runs.

A single run is only 13.1 CP/A, but that is still quite significantly better than selling casing gained in the Flit, or Woesel farming.

Comments:

I don't count the action or honey used to get into Parabola because I'm assuming you'll turn in the grind whenever you need something else from beyond the mirror. Also, the minor profit you get in nevercold steel will definitely cover the cost of that honey if you're truly worried about it.

If you have VERY high Watchful (297+), you don't need the Palimpest Scraps, and you'll get slightly more steel in the end. I don't know how to farm Palimpest Scraps - I bought them from the Rat Market for some Uncanny Incunabulum.

I'm not sure exactly how this compares to Loitering Spam (where you farm a ton of Hastily Scrawled Warning Note with another account and then sacrifice them in your Social Engagements tab). This just happens to be single-player and, as far as I can tell, more efficient.

I'm not counting the Watchful CP gained from the checks, though you can estimate that you'll get about 14 CP per run through on average (so, ~0.67 CPA). Not as important, but a nice bonus if you're not capped on Watchful.

Plus, turn-in grinds are very fun to finish, as you get to see massive leaps in your stats all at once!

[inkstainedheartbeats]

What’s this? Another silly AU? (Please note silly does not mean this is gonna be angst free). Modern AU, Upside Down Events still happen, but I’m unsure if I wanna keep the deaths.

This now has a name: Learning to be Loved

It takes everything inside Tommy to not pull over on the side of the road and throw up. He left this town as quickly as he could. Wanted nothing to do with it, with the constant death, with his father and brothers. Leaving his mother, leaving the little plot of land where his sister sleeps was a blow to the gut but he needed to go. His hands tighten on the steering wheel, he ran because Hawkins would have been his death. And now here he is running back.

Ten years older and thousands in debt thanks to a degree he never even got to finish. Still, his eyes flick back to the three little girls sleeping in their seats, it wasn’t all bad. Sure Lloyd was probably the worst Alpha Tommy could have let knock him up, he was everything Tommy hated he had become in high school, but he had treated Tommy right at the start. He treated Tommy like an equal instead of the way most Alphas did here in Hawkins. They’d spent three years dancing around each other, two of them Tommy spent fixing all the shit in his head… okay, not all. Up until he fled he’d had a therapist visit every other Wednesday, but most of it. He recognized that painting ‘Nancy the Slut Wheeler’ was a shit thing to do, that spreading rumors that could get them hurt in their small, often backward ass, town was a morally indefensible thing to do. He’s grown. Has had to grow. He has children to raise and an Alpha who showed his true colors the moment Tommy got pregnant. Raging and throwing things, breaking things before turning toward Tommy. The baby couldn’t be his. He wouldn’t raise the bastard.

Only when the twins were born, a week and a half early Lloyd had come crawling back. Begging to be part of their lives. And like a fool Tommy had said yes. Carol’s parents had divorced and while her dad was amazing he hadn’t known what or how to raise two kids on his own. And if Barty couldn’t do it, how could Tommy?? He stayed too long. Let Lloyd stay too long. Muscle memory has him almost turning onto Loch Lora before remembering that Steve doesn’t live there anymore.

“Daddy? Where are we?” Bellamy asks, her big brown eyes looking around.

She has his eyes but Tommy likes to think she got the brown from Steve. That there was a tangible connection between them. He’s pulled over, car idling as he digs out his phone. Can’t stay here long, the neighbors get pissy, but he needs to look up Steve’s address. Dr Marnie would be disappointed in him, dropping by an old ex friend’s house unannounced. But even when they were on the outs Steve looked out for him. The pact made between Omegas never weakened.

“We’re in Hawkins, babydoll, daddy’s just gotten a little turned around is all.”

Plus Steve’s facebook profile is public for the world to see. Complete with address and place of employment. Steve’s a teacher nowadays. Tommy hadn’t dared look further than that. Didn’t have the right to, which makes just as little sense now as it did when he mentioned that to Dr Marnie. He’d done the same to Carol. Looked at that little About section, only addresses and place of work. Needed to see how they were doing. Carol is an accountant, or maybe a CPA, not that Tommy knows what the fuck that means. Finding the address he gets to driving.

It doesn’t take long to get the quaint little house. The outside is painted a cheery yellow the neighbors must hate or love. There are toys in the yard. This is it. He takes a deep breath, steps out of his shitty second hand car that barely fits his three daughters and all he packed for them, and starts the process of unloading the girls. They gather close around him, nervous about the new environment. Together the little family approaches the round green door. Knocks.

“Heya, Steve.”

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Hope you don’t mind the tag @busyheadkeepbreathing but you sounded super into this idea part two available