#could be filed under

[petshopbutch]

submissive in the way a livestock guardian dog is submissive to the sheep it kills wolves for

[charbies]

"i'm literally the priest's favorite sacrificial lamb because i am so docile and sweet and i hold very still when they put the rope around my neck and i trot along so happily while they lead me to the altar and they do not even have to tie me down because i lie so very still and only bleat once or twice in my lovely lamb voice and when the knife comes down it cuts through me like butter and i offer no resistance and i bleed so prettily all over my new white wool and my guts all unspool like the most beautiful shining yarn and my eyes are animal and dumb and hold no accusation and every time i die i come right back as another little lamb because the priest loves me so so much and he always chooses me for the sacrifice every time and he always places one hand on my small and twitching nose to calm me while he lifts the knife and he doesn't do it for the other lambs only me because i'm his favorite"

[javelinbk]

The Beatles in their suite at the New York Plaza, 7th February 1964

File this under: things that remind me Ringo is the oldest

[hrokkall]

DIVINE AUTOPSY

Text from a post by @bedrock-to-buildheight about angel anatomy and the physical manifestations of regret that can only be purged in a bloody vivisection.

[morganbritton132]

Pleaseeee I need the live stream audience’s (and their fbi agent) reaction to Steve pulling the nail bat out to defend Ozzy’s honour. The series is so amazing thank you for giving it to us!

Considering the fact that Eddie got Steve to sit down on the bed, kissed his forehead, and then left Steve, Ozzy, and the live-stream to go ‘talk’ to Dan, the unanimous reaction among the chat was, what the actual fuck.

Steve, mindless to the live-stream, flops back on the bed with a loud sigh and doesn’t even complain when Ozzy, still wet from what little time he had in his pool, jumps up on the bed next to him. Steve ruffles Ozzy’s wet fur and tells him, “You deserve nice things, buddy. If an asshole breaks your things, you have every right to break their face. That’s justice, right?”

Ozzy puts his paw on Steve’s chest and Steve nods, “You get me.”

Meanwhile, the chat is blowing up with people being like ‘adorable’ and ‘cute’ and ‘I wish he’d pet me like that’ while other people who aren’t incurably horny are just like, ‘are we going to talk about the bat? Why the fuck does that thing exist? Why does it look used? Why is it being wielded by a middle school teacher with fucking ease???’

“He’s a jock,” Eddie answers. “Of course, he has a bat. All jocks have bats.”

‘NOT WITH NAILS IN IT’ The chat explodes.

“Home security?” Eddie tries with a shrug. “I’ve been trying to get him to GET RID OF IT for decades now.”

Steve doesn’t even lift his head when he says, “I got rid of my axe.”

“You had your axe taken away from you,” Eddie replies because that was true. After the gates were officially closed, the government confiscated everything that so much as breathed in the direction of the Upside Down. Both Steve’s axe and Eddie’s sweetheart were taken.

The only reason the nail bat survived was because the government didn’t know it existed.

A couple days later when half his live-stream chats are still filled with people being like ‘why was he so comfortable holding it?’ and ‘this is a prop from a music video, right?’ and ‘please answer or I’m going to actually die,’ Eddie does provide an answer. He says, “Try googling Hawkins, Indiana. I think that’ll answer all of your questions.”

It does not.

It actually asks a lot more questions.

The introduction of the somewhat-alluded-to-before nail bat to the Steddie Conspiracy Forums causes absolute chaos. No one can agree on anything. It validates so many theories and creates dozens more especially when Steve lets it slip in the background of another live-stream that Jonathan actually made the bat and Steve just never gave it back.

Meanwhile, the only benefit to Steve’s particular brand of shitty parents is that he learned how to girlboss gaslight gatekeep from absolute pros. Anytime one of his students asks him about the nail bat, Steve acts like he has no idea what they’re talking about. He has literally never heard of such a thing, “Like the animal? Their fingernails?”

As for their agent.

Their reaction was heard across all the office cubicles in the basement of the building. Just a loud, disbelieving, “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?”

[bluetaho]

TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT EVERYTHING YOU COULD HAVE HAD, SIXER!

Close-ups

[mindibindi]

[essektheylyss]

Does no one else find it odd that magic that had been inhibited by the Malleus Key keeps being slowly and quietly returned with seemingly no changes to the key itself? Is the Solstice still stuck or is it simply progressing very slowly? Is anyone working on this in Exandria? Can we get some answers about this?

[starlight-eclipsed]

A theoretical scene for chapter 23 of A Dark Among the Lights by LuckyLectio on AO3.

Fun fact: this was supposed to be a silly doodle since I was tired. However, being sleepy, I went on autopilot and was halfway through coloring the darn thing when I realized what was happening.

[pilkypills]

Remember how Thorin got everyone to play along when Bilbo was doing his parasites bit but still went all “oooh no thanks to your stupid burglar” after gandalf saved them?? 🤨 what was that all about? Did he get what Bilbo was doing or not???

[asakurahaos]

[formulaonedirection]

Lando and his chosen family 💖

For my most beloved @des-iderate

[tardxsblues]

Clara? You asked me what we're going to do. I told you -- we're going to hell. Or wherever it is people go when they die, if there is anywhere. Wherever it is, we're going to go there, and we're going to find Danny. And if it is in any way possible, we're going to bring him home. Almost every culture in the universe has some concept of an afterlife. I always meant to have a look around, see if I could find one.

[nonapteral]

UNIversary Week Day THREE!!! Your favorite relationship, platonic or otherwise :)

I love these besties soooo much they're so interesting by themselves and so funny and fun together. Here's one of my favorite aspects of the friend group-- when Hilda and Chaos both annoy Gordeau <3

[57sfinest]

JEAN VICQUEMARE -- It’s clear by the tension in his shoulders that he isn’t having it with you today. “Can you, like, shut the fuck up?”

AUTHORITY -- Who is he to say that to you? He’s *your* satellite-- you outrank him. Put him in his place.

RHETORIC (Challenging: Success) -- Say something to throw him off. Something he can’t respond to.

YOU -- “Call your dick rotisserie chicken the way I eat the skin first.”

JEAN VICQUEMARE -- The baffled silence you get in response is a decisive victory. He has nothing to say to that.

KIM KITSURAGI -- Neither, apparently, does the lieutenant, who had only just returned from refilling his coffee when these blows were exchanged. His face is impassive as he seats himself back at his desk, but you can hear him say to himself--

KIM KITSURAGI -- “Maybe the 41st isn’t for me.”

[ewkpop]

#GGNSummer ☀︎ ewkpop's best of summer: ↳Darling by Girl's Day (2014)