#cooking with bombur

[lathalea]

good day my king, it’s jaybird again. i was wondering if you could share any recipes of bombur’s, namely one with potatoes and hearty protein (i know how dwarves favor a carnivorous diet). i’m in need of suggestions for an important dinner i am to cook for some dear friends of mine, and many reliable sources tell me how savory his cooking always is. i hope you’re having a restful day, it’s probably getting very cold around the mountain now. stay warm!

sincerely, jaybird

🍪

Dear Lady Jaybird,

It is a rare honour to receive your letter. I hope the raven I am sending to you with my reply arrives on time and in good health. During the last two weeks we have had three large snowstorms and only today the weather has cleared sufficiently to allow Rawk to travel. If you would be so kind as to ensure that he is warm, well-fed and sufficiently rested before he embarks on the return trip, I would be endlessly grateful.

As you can perhaps imagine, this has been a busy time for Bombur, but as soon as he heard that you are in search of a fitting meal for your friends, he provided me with one of his favourite recipes. He asks your forgiveness since he is not familiar with the units of measurement or volume you prefer nor is he aware of your food preferences or allergies (if any). Please feel free to adjust the recipe as you see fit.

Bombur’s Hearty Winter Casserole

INGREDIENTS 4.5 lbs /2 kgs potatoes 2.5 lbs/1 kg smoked sausage 0.7 lb/300 g smoked bacon 4 onions 4 carrots 0.9 lbs / 400 g green peas (canned green peas work well too) Shredded cheese of your choice (as much as you like) Salt, pepper

METHOD

1. Peel and boil the potatoes until they are still a bit hard. "We do not want them to turn into a mush!" Bombur says.

2. Peel and slice the carrots and onions. When the potatoes have cooled down, slice them too. The slices should not be too thin. 

3. Grease a cast-iron pot (Bofur’s favourite!) or a casserole with oil. Preheat the oven to 350*F/180*C. You can also prepare it on a stovetop or over a fire if you happen to find yourself in wilderness. In that case, you can add half a cup of water at the end and cover the pot with a lid.

3. Slice the sausage and bacon and then fry until golden brown. Bombur says that a bit thicker slices work very well here.

4. Put a layer of smoked bacon on the bottom of the casserole.

5. The next layer should contain potato, carrot and onion slices on top of the bacon. Add some green peas. Season the layer with salt and pepper.

6. Layer the sausage on top of the vegetables.

7. Repeat layers as many times as you need.

8. Put a few slices of bacon on top as the last layer.

9.  Bake for about 30 minutes.

10. Open the oven, sprinkle with shredded cheese.

11. Bake for around 15 minutes more or until the cheese melts nicely.

12. Time to eat! 

Attached to this letter you will find a picture of this fine meal made by the talented Ori.

Both Bombur and I hope that you and your friends will find this meal to your liking!

Your humble servant,

👑 Thorin Oakenshield

[porphyriosao3]

#10 Campfire

They had only been on the road three days and Bilbo was already sick of stew.  Now that they had stopped, he just knew that was what Bombur would make.  Well, to be fair, he was sick of a great number of things; snoring, for one.  Yes, quite thoroughly sick of that.  No proper meals, for another; meals weren't adequate in number, content, nor serving methods.  Oh, and mustn't forget rude comments, they were on the list for certain, as were a few dwarves who were so nosey that Lobelia herself would call foul.  Really, any decent person would...

"Master Boggins, what's that scowl for?  Beards of the seven fathers, you look like Uncle when he's brooding!"  Speaking of rude and nosey, the hobbit sighed.

"Thank you for that, Kili.  And it's Baggins, as I've told you a dozen times already.  I was just reflecting on how different life on the road is than what I was used to, nothing to concern yourself over."  He sniffed and looked away, signaling to anyone normal that the conversation was at an...

"What do you mean?"  The young dwarf's face was guileless and open.  Bilbo wanted to sigh directly in that young face but even he couldn't bring himself to be so rude, especially to one of the few dwarves that would actually speak to him directly.  "This is actually pretty nice as traveling goes.  Better than a camping trip, I'll say, but still I see your point, it's not as good as when we escorted that caravan to Tharbad.  Have you ever been to Tharbad?  They have a building there that..."  Green Lady give me strength, Bilbo prayed.  Kili nattered on about something he had seen in some city Bilbo was vaguely familiar with.  The hobbit opened his mouth to be crashingly rude indeed when Bombur called him over.  Saved, he thought.

"Master Baggins," the rotund dwarf said with a smile, "I wanted to ask you about dinner.  You seemed from the state of your home to be a good cook, and if the food we had was any indication you know your way around a kitchen for sure!  Also," he murmured in a lower voice, "you seemed to need saving, so I hope you don't mind.  He's a fine lad, but a bit fond of the jibjab, bless him."  Bilbo's surprised chuckle was the first time he could remember laughing since leaving home, and that was enough to brighten his spirits a tiny bit by itself.  "Now here's what I have, along with this brace of coneys Ori got with his sling.  What do you think we could do with these?"  As they put their heads together to try to make up something more palatable than more stew Bilbo supposed he would be an accomplished campfire cook by the time he returned home, and that wasn't nothing.

[shirefantasies]

A Headcanon For Each Member of Thorin’s Company

Mini post between full request posts! Just felt like jotting these down hehe

✧ Balin knows a little bit of Elvish, but never lets on to that because, quite simply, it’s infinitely funnier not to. What fun would it be letting the elves shit talk him if they knew he picked up on bits of it?

✧ Dwalin’s dream wife is someone super soft and sweet. He’d die before he admits it, but he loves the idea of being the hero for his princess even if he acts like it’s an inconvenience.

✧ Some of it is natural, too, hardening from many of life’s experiences, but part of why Thorin puts on such a tough act is because he actually feels really awkward in conversations. For example, thus man dwarf cannot flirt to save his life.

✧ Oin hates being dismissed because of his hearing, but also? It can so be used to his advantage. The younger ones are squabbling over something stupid and trying to bring him i to it? Oops, sorry lads, can’t hear ya.

✧ Gloin is the proudest father. He can barely go a few minutes without busting out his locket’s picture of Gimli or telling a story about him…or both! Practically ready to throw hands with Bombur, who isn’t even competitive, on who has the coolest son.

✧ Bifur was quite the heartbreaker back in his heyday. He’s still a great flirt, but less people can understand him now so his lines often go unnoticed.

✧ Bofur quietly envies his brother’s family. He may not want fourteen kids or anything, but being around the wee ones warms his heart and he especially lives the idea of having a little girl someday if Mahal so blesses him.

✧ I of course adore the fanon/cast canon that Bombur has a huge family, but also? By dwarf standards his wife is super hot, so the others may make fun of him, but can’t deny that he scores!

✧ Dori is a way better cook than he seems like he is. The role tends to get passed to Bombur as he loves it the most, but since he grew up taking care of his brothers Dori knows his way around the kitchen!

✧ Nori loves cats. If he sees a stray in a village he offers it food and coaxes it over. The others marvel at how much the creatures love him, too, like some sort of instinctive trust.

✧ The others talk big about the ravishing women they’ve seen and he tries to keep up, but Ori doesn’t really actually get it. That’s how he realizes that, even though there isn’t such a word for it, he is demisexual. He also is more attracted to human women, they just seem softer and sweeter to him.

✧ Part of the reason Fili carries so many blades is because he enjoys crafting them. It’s a skill he learned from his uncle Thorin, standing at his side and helping before taking up the craft himself.

✧ Fili was the one who defended Kili from derision by other young dwarves when he chose to learn archery, an unusual form of combat in their culture. From then on, Kili vowed to become stronger and faster so he could defend those he loves, too.

✧ Bilbo bonds with Ori over sewing and knitting, smiling as he learns he has company because quite frankly he never thought a dwarf would know such arts, let alone join him as they teach each other.

[meteors-lotr]

Thorin cooks Bilbo a meal as a type of thank you for the help and he refuses to take any gold or anything but the lad really loves food so let’s give him that, and he presents it to Bilbo all excited but Bilbo doesn’t eat anything he just stares at like the three course meal that’s in front of him and Thorin gets super nervous because oh no is it bad I’m so sorry Bombur prepped me for like a month for this don’t hobbits eat everything did I somehow manage to cook something that even a hobbit won’t consume oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck but Bilbo isn’t even noticing his panic because his brain is trying to catch up to the fact that Thorin just proposed to him

[bookworm-with-coffee]

Insecurities. . .

(Kili x Reader)

(A/N); Hello and welcome, readers!! As always, thank you for stopping by!! I thought it was high time to write a fic for Kili! After all, who can resist that cheeky smile of his?? Do enjoy! ❤

Plot; Comfort drabble

Pairings; Kili x Reader (Romantic)

Warnings; fluffity-fluff and some angy-angst

_____________________________________

The evening was cheerful, the Company of Thorin Oakenshield having stopped for the night after a long day's travels. Peaceful ambience of the forest began to increase in the nightfall, the breeze light and cool as it swayed through the rustling trees.

Firelight filled the camp with a warm flickering glow, the smell of woodsmoke and Bombur's cooking potent in the air. Conversation was easy to find and delightful, as always. Bofur, Dwalin, Nori and a few of the others were sat together, conversing in what sounded like their native tongue. The intricacies and mysteries of Khuzdul still left you amazed, despite how it was only merriful banter.

You had stood by Bombur, offering to take Bofur's place tonight as the food-server. Each bowl of soup was steaming hot, your steps having to be quick to avoid burning yourself too badly from the scalding liquid as it dripped from the bowl. Each Dwarf had eagerly taken the food that was offered, exhaustion fueling their hunger. Even Bilbo and Gandalf seemed relieved to finally be eating this evening. The days were long and draining, trudging through the wilderness in the everchanging landscape. You too found relief in finally dropping down beside the youngest of the two Princes once your rounds were finished.

Fili, who usually kept him company of a nighttime, was occupied in the audacious conversations nearby. The booming laughter that rang out almost startled you whilst you settled in alongside Kili, him offering the occasional soft chuckle at the words being thrown between bites of his food.

Darting to you, the Prince's hazel eyes glistened with the embers of the campfire. A soft smile of amusement crossed his face, the action always seeming to offer you comfort. "What are they on about now?", you quirked a brow, his expression becoming contagious.

"By this point in the conversation, I don't think you want to know".

"Enlighten me", you encouraged, laughter slipping from the Princeling's lips. It was hard for Kili to restrain his smile when he finally obliged.

"They're taking bets on whether or not Bofur uses his hat in the bedroom".

"Pigs", you huffed, a moment's silence passing before you added, "He clearly does". The Prince snorted, his soup suddenly travelling through his nostrils. Something akin to a guffaw escaped his lips, whilst he desperately tried to grapple his composure in your now shared laughter.

"Agreed", he managed to wheeze out, wiping at his face and mouth.

In moments like this, you appreciated the bond that had formed between you both. Despite the seriousness of the quest at hand, you always found yourself at ease within Kili's easygoing nature and cheeky humour. He always had a way of soothing your anxieties with his jokes and lighthearted conversations, always looking on the brighter side of things. And although he was oblivious to such things, you'd come to find him to be quite beautiful.

It was hard not to when the light of the fire danced over his features, illuminating the strands of hair that fell effortlessly over his face. You'd come to admire those wavy tresses with their now auburn glow, sitting over his strong and broad shoulders. You wondered how he cared for them, keeping them so clean despite the lack of hygiene this quest entailed.

With his head turned and gaze fixed on the forest ahead, you found that his messed half-up had lost a few strands that dangled, masking the Prince's handsome face from your current view. His metal clasp was now sitting loosely on the back of his head. And although it offered him a fitting style, you wished to fix it for him.

Dinner became suddenly forgotten in your new endeavours when you decided to test the waters with Kili. Reaching for the strand that had fallen loose over his face, your fingertips worked the silken strands behind his ear with a delicate precision. The Prince almost seemed to stiffen at your touch, his breaths halting whilst goosebumps ignited across his skin. His lips had parted, lashes fluttering. No woman had ever touched him like that before. And although there was nothing sensual about your touch, it made every part of him light up like fire, craving more of that soothing gentleness.

Sensing his quiet, you became hesitant to continue. "May I fix your hair for you?". Your question had his hazel orbs clouding in confusion, scanning your face for any sign that you may have been jesting. He nodded shyly, his voice seeming to waver slightly,

"Please". That being all the confirmation you needed, you pulled the large clasp from his hair, the thick layers falling loose. Excitement bubbled in your chest whilst you shuffled closer to the handsome Dwarf.

Steadying his breaths, he resisted the shudder that passed through him when your fingers began working through his hair like a gentle comb. You began to remove the small tangles, relishing in the soft touch of his hair. The moisture in the strands was not greasy or dirty in nature and his waves bounced back, unaffected by your touches. The Prince's eyes had fallen closed, his dinner being long abandoned in his blissful state. The sensation of your nails brushing over his scalp had him drawing his bottom lip between his teeth to fight the pleasurable sighs that dared to leave his throat.

The boisterous conversations that once ensnared his attention had faded from his ears. He was barely able to register your voice when you spoke so gently to him. "Your hair is so beautiful", you marveled, spindling his soft hair between your fingers playfully. "How do you keep it so soft and lovely?". The young Prince felt his throat tightening from shock, pondering what your interest was in his hair. In his opinion, there was nothing special about his tresses.

Kili gathered no attention from women, unlike his fellow kin. His complete lack of facial and body hair meant that to any respectable Dwarf, he was considered ugly or unattractive. At your compliments, it was only normal for him to be in a state of disbelief. You were the first and only woman to take interest.

"It's nothing special", he finally murmured. "I just use a light oil after I wash my hair".

"You need to lend it to me sometime", you insisted with a grin, your eyes seeming to sparkle with mirth. "It works wonders on your hair. It's so beautiful". Kili felt his heartbeat increase, his tone falling quieter amidst his further disbelief.

"Do you think so?". In a sudden surge of confidence, you replied,

"I know so. You have the most gorgeous looking hair out of all the Dwarves in this Company". His eyes had blown wide, his lips parting in surprise. "It looks lovely pinned back", you added, finally binding his hair securely with his clasp. "Or left out". You shrugged. He grew confused when you shuffled in front of him. "But, I think I like your fringe the most. It frames your kind face without hiding it".

You were so close now, your (e/c) eyes trained on the delicate strands that made up his bangs. Your touch was featherlight and uncalloused, your face screwed in concentration. In your current focus, you didn't see the admiration and awe for you that shimmered in his gaze. Never had he gotten attention like this, even from a friend. Friend. He despised that word when his thoughts drifted to you. But, how could you possibly ever find him attractive?? His lack of facial hair and muscle was unmanly, even by human standards.

You were strangely beautiful to Kili. You weren't as tall or lithe as the Elves, nor as creamy-skinned or graceful. You had perfect little imperfections in your skin and freckles. Your hair had character, being curly. And you almost always wore your hair out of your face, the odd stray hair coming to frame it perfectly. And from the moment he sensed his feelings for you some weeks ago, Kili had felt his confidence decrease. He felt as if he had no chance with 12 other eligible Dwarves in the Company that could easily win you over with their toned bodies and lavish, braided hair.

The Princeling wasn't oblivious to how you often spent your time with Ori, looking through his books and learning how to knit the varying patterns he practiced. And despite how Ori was much younger than Kili, he had an attractive amount of body hair. He was nowhere near as confident as the Prince, nor as rehearsed in the prowess of battle. However, it didn't stop the envy that crept its way into his heart and mind. Looks had always mattered to everyone else before, so why would it be any different now?

When your cooler hands brushed over his face whilst you worked, it left burning tingles in his skin. You noted the perfect shaping of his eyebrows, running your thumbs over them to smooth any stray hairs. His features were strong, to be expected of a man in Dwarven culture. You swept loose pieces of his fringe from his cheeks, his stubble seductively rough beneath your skin.

Some part of you preferred Kili without a beard. All the hair that hung from the others was so extravagant, but you liked seeing more of his face. His cheeky smile was your favourite thing to see, even on a bad day. Perhaps a beard would hide that?

Raking his fringe up for slight volume, you found yourself taken by how ethereal he seemed. You questioned yourself on whether or not it was your lack of food and rest from the day, but you couldn't ignore the fondness that crept into your soul at being so close with him. A smile marked your face, setting the last strands of his dark locks aside.

"Beautiful", you'd murmured, a sense of accomplishment filling your heart. The warmth of his skin increased beneath your lingering fingertips, his hazel gaze playing over your softer features. To his greater surprise, there was only genuity in your expression. Not wanting you to retreat from him, Kili placed his heated callouses over your own, fighting the way his eyes slightly glazed over with tears.

"Thank you". He offered you one of those boyish smiles, taking comfort in the suppleness of your skin beneath his own. You caressed the stubble beneath your skin, grazing your thumb over the smoothness of his sharp cheekbone. Kili chuckled in amusement, "I look a bit more dignified now".

"Nonsense. Your hair looked fitting either way", you laughed softly, squeezing the warmer hands that held your own. "It's truly beautiful. Stubble and all". His dark brows had risen, wonder filling his kind gaze. You really didn't mind his lack of body hair??

"I always thought my stubble was– I thought it may have been unsightly", he confessed with the hints of a nervous smile, your brows creasing in light concern. "Beards are of high importance in my culture".

"Not in mine", you shrugged, slowly trailing your thumb over his dimples and slightly chapped lips. "Besides, how else would I be able to see that gorgeous smile?". The shy grin that slowly splayed onto his face at your words was the happiest one you'd ever seen on the Prince. Your words had dissolved any unsurities in his heart. "That's the one", you giggled, Kili trying and failing to restrain his smile.

"I think I like yours better", he murmured, sweeping one of your stray curls from your face. "It's the one I fell for, after all".

The small gap between you both closed, Kili's burning lips meeting yours in a gentle touch. It started off unsure and light, becoming almost fervent when your head tilted and lips parted to allow his tongue to slip past them. Using his hand resting along your jaw, he guided your head closer to his own, relishing in the need to be as close to you as possible. His stubble scratched the skin of your face pleasurably, a soft sigh exhaling through your nose.

The both of you separated, your lips swollen and tingling from the caresses and nibbles of his own. Kili's eyes finally fluttered open after a few moments, skimming your face with a soft tenderness. "Abnâmul", he whispered, running a heated digit over your tingling lips. "You'll have to let me do that more often".

"I'll have to think about it", you mused, squeezing the hand that cradled your face affectionately.

"Hopefully not too hard", Kili sighed in pretend dejection, tracing his thumb along your cheek. "I do really love you".

"I'm glad the feeling is mutual", you chuckled softly, pressing your lips to his with a playfulness. No longer burdened with his insecurities, Kili's laughter chased your own,

"Me too".

The End. . .

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Hey, everyone! I hope you all enjoyed this fic! As always, any and all feedback is welcome!! If you wish to be a part of my taglist, check out my masterlist and let me know what you'd like to be tagged in! ❤❤❤

* * *

Translations;

Abnâmul = "beautiful", (Khuzdul)

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TAGLIST; @fizzyxcustard @lathalea @emrfangirl

[pilkypills]

Dwarves + facebook:

Balin: makes it his business to understand how to properly use social media. Technologically savvy grandpa.

Dwalin: does not understand how liking a post works. Instead comments “👍” on everything.

Dori: “I am no longer bringing my apple cobbler to the Neighborhood Association Meeting. Korik son of Morik is a NOSY busybody and MOST UNPLEASANT TO BE AROUND. If you want a piece of apple cobbler you may come by my house tomorrow. Will be cooking. DO NOT TELL KORIK!!!!!!!!!!!”

Bofur, Bombur, Nori, Gloin: young enough to understand social media, old enough to want to use facebook. Normal behavior. Gloin probably only ever uploads family vacation photos.

Bifur, Oin: both refuse to use facebook. Oin does not trust the internet. Bifur doesn’t either, but is still willing to use youtube to watch cat videos and woodworking tutorials.

Thorin: every single status update he has ever posted EVER is accompanied by a near-identical badly-lit selfie taken at an upward angle far too close to the camera. captions are things like “having dinner tonight with my beautiful husband. Mahal is good.”

Fili, Ori: think facebook is Cringe but feel obligated to have an account so they can keep in touch with old fart relatives

Kili: facebook is for lamers. exclusively uses tiktok

[brainrotbabe24]

Ways Thorin’s company will remember you while they are on an adventure!

Balin: In the art books, it said Balin has a lectern he would write on while traveling. So in keeping with that idea, I would say his quill pens would remind him of you. I imagine he has a busy life and tends to forget about the little things. So when he is on a journey, he will curse himself for forgetting quill pens. But lo and behold in his bag would be a new set. He would chuckle to himself knowing that you always looked out for him. 

Dwalin: Dwalin seems like the type of guy who would get a tattoo for you. Not your face or a heart saying “I love y/n” but something small and sentimental. For example, if you were into gardening or the outdoors, he would have a tree sapling on his leg. If you were into baking, he would have a bread knife on his forearm. If you were a singer, he would get lyrics across his chest. Each night he would take some time to look at the tattoo, and images of you would flutter in his mind. 

Óin: You know his skills of healing are important on any adventure. So in the months leading up to it, you see him gathering herbs and other medicinal supplies to bring. To help him out, you would’ve bought a pouch to hold his supplies in. Oin loves it and regularly puts his most precious herbs in there. He doesn’t let anyone touch it and makes sure it’s secure to his body at all times. Oin loves feeling the material and will unconsciously run his fingers over it when thinking about you. 

Glóin: Isn’t it obvious he will have a picture of you in his pocket lol. He can’t stand not seeing your lovely face while on the road and basically demanded a portrait of you made. He made sure on the day of the portrait he adorned you with the most beautiful jewelry, beads, and braids. You loved it! So when he looks at the picture, he sees all his work/love was being worn proudly by you. He likes having your face be the last thing he sees at night and the first thing he sees in the morning. 

Bifur: Such a sweetie! He would’ve kept a wooden toy you tried to carve… and failed at. Back before he left, you would’ve tried making a toy. You had seen him do it a hundred times, so you didn’t think it would be that hard. A little surprise for him would be perfect. Welp, you messed it up and got so frustrated you threw it out. He found it of course and kept it. He carries it everywhere and takes it out when there is free time. He would never tell you he kept it, knowing you would be embarrassed but loves you for trying his craft. He is beyond proud! 

Bofur: Bofur knows you long for adventure and would feel bad when he couldn’t take you on trips. So to help you “see” the world, he makes sure to learn a song from the area. You guys have a tradition: he leaves, learns a song, comes home, and sings to you. I imagine when he is out in the wild he will keep the song stuck in his head thinking of your reaction to it. 

Bombur: Oh, you spoil him!!! Once you heard he was going on a journey, you would instantly go out and buy him new cooking utensils. He would cherish it, though. He would delicately bring them out every evening and refuse to let anyone else touch them. He would clean the utensils until he could see his reflection thinking of you all the while!

Ori: Before he leaves on a journey, He will set up a knitting date with you. You will both make each other socks, a hat, a scarf—whatever comes to mind! Before you give each other the gift, you make sure that your initials are sewn into them. In times when he is uncertain of his journey, he will look to your initials and think of you. 

Dori: I would imagine since he prides himself on appearance he would have jewelry, and one ring (lol) would stick out to him. You can find him fidgeting with it and even staring at it for long times. It was your present to him, and even if he is covered in mud and his appearance is less than perfect, he will make sure to clean his hand/that finger with the ring first.

Nori: He stole something of yours, but you have to guess. It’s less about the object and more of the joke/tradition that reminds him of you. He will look at whatever trinket he stole and think about you looking all over the house for it. He will chuckle at the thought and will smile, knowing that once he returns and shows you the missing object, you both will giggle. 

Thorin: In the book, Thorin had a harp. I feel the rough and tumble adventure would occasionally get the strings to snap. So when he sees a neat bundle of wire in his bag, he would be thinking of you. His face would get red and a small smile would appear on his face. He loves knowing you think of him! I guarantee when he gets home he will play the harp for you, as a thank you.

Fíli: While I want to say a knife... because it fits him perfectly. I would have to say pipe weed. Fili would be the type to enjoy a smoke while by the fire, and since his trips are always long and filled with danger, he savors the nights he can relax. He would sit back, relax, watch the fire, and “inhale you." The pipe weed would remind him of you, the smell bringing back memories of your hands, hair—anything really. And if he was able to share this precious weed with everyone, he would thank you secretly for helping everyone relax. 

Kíli: Kili seems like the type of dwarf that brushes his hair. It’s less in braids, so it probably gets knotted up more. So having a small comb/brush gifted by you to help detangle after a long day is exactly what he needs. Kili uses it so much and will ask Fili to help brush his hair. He will then close his eyes and imagine you are brushing his hair…His dream would be interrupted, of course, by Fili saying, “Brother, please tell me why you have mud in your hair…”lol

Bilbo: He will keep a book! Maybe one of your favorites that you wrote your notes in. He loves looking over your scribbles, ideas, and thoughts you wrote in the margins! His favorite lines are ones he isn’t supposed to know. For example, he once found a note saying, "Bilbo’s birthday surprise will be on Tuesday. Get Cake!” He would blush and think about how much he loves you. 

Gandalf: He was a tough one to think about....Out of everyone, I feel like he will be gone the most. So, he would love it if you helped him sew up any holes in his outfit. When he is out in the world the stitching will remind him of you and how much you care for him.

[welikeimagines-andfandoms]

Thorins Company’s favourite slang word

(Honestly this is mainly for my girl @shirefantasies 😂😂)

- Thorin: Slay (He doesn’t fully get it but he likes that it sounds badass)

- Fili: No cap (Thinks it sounds cool)

- Kili: Ok, Boomer (Mainly just says it to himself when dealing with Thorin)

- Ori: Say less (He’s down for whatever so he likes how it relates to that)

- Nori: Slaps (Thinks it’s fun and will over use it)

- Dori: Low/High Key (Just thinks it’s fun)

- Bombur: Bussin’ (He has never found a better word for food and cooking in his life)

- Bofur: Vibing (This man is a vibe, he lives and breathes it)

- Bifur: Lit (To the point and will over use it)

- Oin: Mood (He’s old and finds it’s a great way to explain life. Not quite sure he understands it but he’s got the spirit)

- Gloin: Yeet (He’s an excited dude and will say this in battle)

- Dwalin: YOLO (Thinks its like a saying of honour and being brave. He will say it with a very serious face)

- Balin: Spill the tea (He’s a girly and wants to know the goss)

- Gandalf: Extra (Hes never found a word that suits him so well)

- Bilbo: Throw shade (The shade queen himself? Ofc he loves it!)

[thorin]

i wrote a little something that i have no idea if i'll continue, but i just really wanted to write a bagginshield fic through kíli's point of view, i thought it'd be fun. so enjoy!

tw: a bit of angst, mention of blood, but nothing too graphic, or excessive.

Contrary to popular belief, Kíli was not stupid.

He knew there'd been something going on between his uncle and Mr. Baggins the second he saw him break a smile —which was already suspicious— at Bilbo at the Carrock before hugging him —even more suspicious— after he'd defended his uncle from what was certain death.

Now don't get him wrong, he was more grateful to Bilbo than he could ever say. He saved Thorin's, and Fíli's, and his life too many times to count. He'd stayed after the battle had died down, and helped the healers, elven and dwarven alike, tend to the wounded and bury the fallen. He'd spent his entire days helping Bombur cook food at the makeshift camp they'd set at the base of the mountain, and when he wasn't cooking, he was stealing peaches and apples from the elves' food carts just for him and Fíli when they were bedridden. And he'd sit beside Thorin and wait for him to wake up when his nephews couldn't be there for him.

Kíli really liked Bilbo. He'd grown on him, all of them, truly. He just couldn't believe someone so small could be so brave, and feisty!

Which is why he was extremely confused when he'd heard Bilbo would be going home after Thorin had woken up.

His first reaction was that he felt abandoned. How could a member of their company simply choose to leave after all they'd been through together? He almost shouted his disagreement, before Fíli took his arm, shaking his head, and looked right at Bilbo: tear tracks on his dirty face. Maybe he wasn't leaving by choice.

He looked to his uncle, sat up against the wooden bedpost. His jaw was set and his adam's apple bobbed, as if it were physically hurting him to not speak up. His eyes were transfixed by Bilbo's back, like if he tried hard enough, his eyes could tell Bilbo all he wouldn't say.

Understanding flashed through Kíli's mind in a second. But it was too late. He tried speaking up again, aware of this new piece of information that he'd uncovered, but Thorin wouldn't have it. And it was frustrating Kíli greatly, because he'd never heard his uncle, his brave, tenacious uncle, speak with such a small, hoarse voice before, and say that if Bilbo wishes to leave, then he is free to go, with his blessing.

None of it rang true. How did no one notice? Why wasn't anyone saying anything?

By the time he'd looked at Bilbo again, he was already out of the tent, backpack on his shoulders.

Kíli was not proud of how he acted. He'd shouted at Thorin, painfully aware of his uncle's feeble health, but unable to contain his grief: he'd killed hundreds and seen another hundred killed, he'd almost lost his brother and uncle, and almost left his mother all alone in this world, and now his friend was leaving him, leaving them all. He'd fought relentlessly for months, why couldn't his uncle fight just a little longer, a little more? Why wouldn't he fight for his family like he said he always would?

Oin kicked Kíli out of the tent the second he saw Thorin's bandages become red. He was horrified. He'd never dream of hurting Thorin, but everything felt wrong. He'd never once cried on this journey. Not when his uncle was knocked unconscious by that foul orc, nor when he'd lost the rune stone given to him by his mother. But now he couldn't hold it in. It all came pouring out as someone —his brother, surely— held him, kneeled down on the ground. He wept until the stars came out.

────────

Months had passed ever since Azsâlul'abad was reclaimed. The harsh Eastern winter had finally given way to spring's sunshine rays, and although the mountain's citizens couldn't say they lived an easy life, they had food and a roof over their heads, which was more than they'd had for years. More and more dwarves were coming home from all over Middle-Earth, as word of Smaug's death was starting to spread. Reconstruction was slow, but steady, and life had shaped itself into a vibrant routine under the Lonely Mountain.

Kíli and Fíli had been crowned princes, and Thorin had been crowned king. His mother had finally come to join them on a caravan she lead from Shahrulbizad, and each member of the company was appointed to some sort of important position in the king's court. It was difficult for Kíli and his brother to get used to their new lives as royalty and the responsibilities that came along with it, and Kíli was grateful for any moment of respite he could have away from the eccentric Iron Hills nobles and Balin's royal classes. His days all looked the same, and yet he found he just couldn't get used to this new life.

Thorin, Kíli had noticed, clearly felt the same, though there was no running away for him. For any person that didn't know his uncle, they'd think he looked perfectly normal, if only a little stern. But Kíli knew that look. It was the same one he'd wear on his face when he attended feasts, sat at his throne, silent, while everybody around him drank and laughed. Or when he attended meetings with the court. Or when he watched Bilbo leave, a winter ago.

Kíli was not stupid. He saw how much his uncle suffered, and how much every single member of the company missed their friend. He missed Bilbo, too.

Which is why he sent a letter adressed to Bilbo Baggins of Bag End in the Shire, pretending to be Thorin II, King Under the Mountain, begging him to come back.

Surely that would solve everybody's problem. Right?

[sweetbutpsychobutsweet]

You Love Bread!

Chapter 8

Thorin Oakenshield x AFAB!Reader

Summary: You wake up from your fainting spell to a group of very concerned dwarves. Thorin in particular would like some answers, and might just have a few ideas up his sleeve to solve your problem...

Warnings: no use of y/n, angst, NSFW, 18+, Minors do not interact, smut, implied eating disorder/starvation

author's note: This chapter ended up being sooo much longer than I anticipated, so I had to break it up into 2 parts. Don't hate me for where I choose to leave this one off😅

Word count: 2121

Someone is pressing a cold cloth to your forehead when you slowly start to drift back into consciousness. You groan as you start to regain feeling in your fingers and toes again. 

It takes a moment for the memory of what happened to flood back in and your breath hitches in a jolt of panic as your eyes snap open and you scramble to get back to your feet. 

“Woah, easy there lass,” Fili’s voice comes from behind you and he removes the cloth from your face to place a firm hand on your shoulder, keeping you from getting back up just yet.

“I’m fine,” you grumble, shaking him off.

“No you’re not,” Kili chuckles from your side. “You swooned into Thorin’s arms like some kind of damsel in distress. You need to take it slow.”

The brothers both bring a hand to your back, gently helping you to sit up further. Fili hands the cool cloth over to you and you sigh in relief as you slide it along your neck and chest. 

Ironically you feel a lot better than you did before you passed out. A gentle breeze blows through your hair, and looking around you can see you are no longer in the same place you were when you lost consciousness. 

Someone has carried you off the path to lie in a patch of grass alongside a small lake. The rest of the company must be waiting nearby as you can hear their booming voices through the trees and can smell the smoke of a campfire and food cooking over the flames. You feel something soft beneath you and look down to find yourself laying on a fur cloak. Thorin’s cloak. 

You look around to try and find him. Farther down the lake you see him conversing with Oin and Bombur. They speak in hushed tones but judging by the troubled looks on their faces it’s safe to assume they’re talking about you.

“She’s awake, uncle,” Kili calls from behind you and Thorin’s head snaps to look over at you. He says something to Oin and they both hurry over to you. 

“Welcome back, lassie,” Oin says, “you gave us quite a fright.”

“You need to eat something,” Thorin says, signaling to Bombur to bring you some food. 

“I’m not hungry,” you tell him, “I just got too hot is all.”

“That wasn’t just heat stroke,” Oin replies with concern, “you’re still very pale and Thorin says you’ve been weak and disoriented all day.”

Of course, he did. You look over at him with a glare. 

“Well then he would be mistaken, I’m perfectly fine.” you lie. 

Bombur finally returns and approaches you with a bowl of soup and some bread but you shake your head, waving him off. 

“I’m not hungry,” you tell them again, “I’m ready to get back on the road I just need a minute to catch my breath.”

“We’re not going anywhere. The others have already started making camp here for the evening, we’ll start up again in the morning,” Thorin insists. He takes the bread from Bombur and shoos him away with the rest.

“But Durin’s day-” you protest, knowing your deadline is fast approaching.

“We can afford to wait a little longer, we already covered enough ground today. Here,” he replies, offering you the bread, “just eat some of this.”

You push his hand away with another shake of your head. You can keep going you know you can. You’ve put a good amount of distance between you and the orcs already; you won’t jeopardize that now. 

“In all the time I’ve known you, I’ve never once seen you refuse bread,” Kili comments with a nervous chuckle.

“You love bread,” Fili agrees. 

You pay them no mind, keeping your eyes locked on Thorin’s as he thoughtfully examines your face. He’s given you no indication yet that he knows your real motives. How could he?

“Leave us,” he instructs the others, still looking at you. 

They all hurry off towards camp without protest. 

Fili hands the damp cloth over to his uncle and gives you another worried look before joining the others. 

Thorin is still looking at you in silence. Your anxiety gets the better of you and you pull your gaze away to look down at the ground, trying to feign innocence. 

He still says nothing. 

Does he expect you to speak first? Perhaps he’s hoping that if he waits long enough you’ll divulge everything to him on your own. 

That’s not going to happen, you laugh to yourself.

He rises to his feet with a sigh, but you still refuse to look at him as he makes his way over to the nearby lake. You hear him dip the cloth back into the water and wring it out before coming to sit in front of you.

He brings two fingers up to your chin, and gently turns your face to look at him. You’re too exhausted to fight him. 

His hand slides down to your neck, gently tipping your head back so he can see you better. You refuse to let your eyes meet his, instead electing to look over his shoulder at the light reflecting off the lake.

You shudder as he brings the cool cloth up to your face, tracing a slow line from your temple all the way down to your jaw. 

“Bombur says he hasn’t seen you eat anything since Rivendell. No one has,” Thorin’s voice is gentle and cautious. Not at all what you were expecting. 

You finally meet his eyes to see they are not angry as you were expecting. Instead, they’re full of fear. You can’t remember the last time you saw this side of Thorin, if ever. 

The cloth makes its way down the column of your neck, inching its way closer and closer towards the top of your breasts. You hate how much you ache for him to touch you there again.

Maybe it’s your desire or his rare show of vulnerability but you can’t help the words that escape your lips. 

“Orcs can smell blood,” you whisper. 

The cloth freezes just above your collarbone and he looks at you in confusion. 

“I’m due to start my monthly cycle in the next few days,” you clarify and can see as the last pieces of the mental puzzle fall into place.

His brow furrows and his hand drops away from your chest.

“You heard what Lord Elrond said. If we are being hunted by Orcs I didn’t want to lead them right to us. I figured if I stopped eating for a while the bleeding wouldn’t start and it would buy us more time to get them off our backs.”

You bite your bottom lip, waiting anxiously for the lecture to begin. For him to yell and shout and tell you how reckless you were, or even worse to send you away from the company until you’re no longer a liability. 

But he doesn’t. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispers. 

You raise an eyebrow at him, “why didn’t I tell you I was about to start menstruating while we’re being hunted by a pack of orcs?”

“Did you think I’d be angry with you?” he scoffs, “over something you can’t control?”

“No, Thorin,” you snap, “I thought you’d send me away. Again!”

He blinks at you in surprise. 

“If me being here puts everyone else in jeopardy, if it puts our quest in jeopardy, then that makes me a liability and it is your duty as king to send me away.”

“Don’t you dare try to tell me what my duty is,” his voice drops into a low growl and his fists begin to clench sending drops of water running down his knuckles from the cloth still in his hand.

“Quest or no quest I am also responsible for the well-being of my people which includes you in case you’ve forgotten. I will not allow you to do something so reckless and idiotic! How can you expect me to successfully lead this company to Erebor if you’re starving yourself while my back is turned? If you had told me earlier we could have found a better solution that didn’t cause you to faint in the middle of the road!”

“You mean if I had told you earlier, you could have left me behind in Rivendell instead of slowing the company down?” you snap back as he moves his face closer to yours. You can see the angry clench of his jaw, and the furrowed lines of his brow that seem to be a permanent facial feature on him.

“I would have thought you’d prefer the company of elves over that of your kin, you certainly seemed to enjoy Lord Elrond’s the other night-” 

You still feel weak from hunger but somehow the rage his words inspire gathers up enough strength for you to roughly shove him away from you. He barely budges and you lift your arms to shove him again, but this time he catches you, grabbing you by the wrists keeping you firmly in place. He pulls you closer into his chest until you’re almost nose to nose. 

“You will stay here with us and you will do so with a full belly. I need you to keep your strength up for the journey ahead and the orcs pursuing us. And I swear to you,” he says with a growl, “ If I ever hear about you trying to starve yourself again, I will personally shove every last crumb down your throat. Do I make myself clear?”

“Oh I have no doubt you’ve been dying to shove something down my throat,” you purr with a wicked grin, “which is why I don’t intend to give you the satisfaction, your grace.”

His grip on your wrists tightens.

“We’ll see about that,” he growls, letting go of your wrists. Before you can even blink his hands are grabbing your face, pulling your lips into his in an angry, passionate kiss. 

You know you should resist him, or at least pretend like you don’t want him as badly as he clearly wants you. But seeing as you are quite literally starving, and he tastes absolutely amazing…

You tangle your hands in his hair and pull him closer to you. You groan in pleasure as his tongue sneaks past your lips forcing himself deeper inside your mouth. His hands leave your face and travel down your body to cup your ass firmly, pulling you into his lap.

You can feel his arousal through his trousers, stabbing your upper thigh, so close to where you want him but not quite close enough. 

He drags his teeth along your bottom lip before starting to kiss a slow path along your jawline and down your neck, biting at your flesh as he travels further and further down. 

You free a hand from his hair and reach it down between the two of you. You press your palm against his length and he growls into your neck. You want to tease him, to drive him to the edge of insanity until he is completely addicted to you. But not as badly as you want to feel him, all of him. You bring your other hand down to help unfasten his pants but before you can succeed he suddenly has you on your back beneath him, wrists held firmly overhead. 

You growl and squirm trying to free yourself but you both know you’re not exactly at fighting strength at the moment. You are completely at his mercy and you can’t stand it. 

“Please,” you whine, trying helplessly to press your body up to meet his again but he refuses to budge. “I need it,” you complain. 

“Oh, I know exactly what you need,” he whispers, his beard tickling your face. He releases just one of his hands, moving your free wrist to join the other and your breath hitches in anticipation, hoping that hand is about to touch you in all the places that ache for him.

You open your mouth to beg for just that when something soft is suddenly stuffed into your mouth. 

You blink at him in confusion before your taste buds can identify the unexpected guest.

Bread!

“You’re going to eat every last crumb,” he demands, “and when you’re done with that you’ll have more. I’m going to stay here and watch you eat every last bite, then and only then, will you get your other needs fulfilled. Do you understand?” 

You nod eagerly, unable to speak around the roll he shoved in your mouth.

His breath his hot against your cheek as he brings his lips closer towards your ear.

“Good girl,” he growls

Next Chapter

Taglist:

@mrsdurin @thetaekwondofeline @enchantingkryptoniteheart-blog

[the-really-lonely-mountain]

Along for the ride, to Erebor - Part 5

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Summary: Transported to Middle Earth, you must Join Thorin Oakenshield's Company as they travel to reclaim Erebor! OR: My take on the classic 'modern girl in Middle Earth' troupe. This is the second installment, so we are following the second movie of The Hobbit trilogy, and falling deeper in love with Kili on the way! This is the second part for the second movie.

Tags: Kili / Reader, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Modern Character in Middle Earth, During The Hobbit, How Do I Tag, Canon-Typical Violence, Kíli Is a Little Shit (Tolkien), implied soulmates, Dwarf Culture & Customs, Freeform, light smut, it's really just a brief description nothing too graphic but i certianly wouldn't want to be caught reading it, Holding Hands, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sleepy Cuddles, Protective Thorin Oakenshield Company Members, Dwalin & Thorin Oakenshield Friendship, Fluff and Humor, Domestic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Where In Middle-Earth Is Gandalf?, Hair Braiding, Dwarf Courting, My First Tumblr Fic, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fíli & Kíli & Thorin Live, Thorin Oakenshield Lives, Fíli Lives (Tolkien), Kíli Lives (Tolkien), sword fight training, kili is a big ole softy and i love him so much for it, tags tbd tbh lol

Word Count: 4,758

A/N: OMG!! I graduated! I got a job! I finally edited this part! I'm so tired y'all, I'm writing this author note at like midnight lol. ~AnywhoOOo~ I hope you enjoy! let me know if you'd like to join the tag list to be directly notified of chapter updates! <3

Divider credit: @cafekitsune

You woke to the usual clanging of pots and pans as breakfast was being cooked. Kili’s hand was still on your waist and his arm was still your pillow, though you were sure it’d gone numb in the night. You gently placed your hand on his cheek and gently ran your thumb over his delicate cheek bone. He looked so handsome sleeping softly beside you, it made you smile like a giddy little girl. You regretted having to softly remove yourself from him, but you had to start packing your things and getting ready for the day, which was so much easier now that you didn’t have to worry about your hair. When you were finished and your bag was neatly packed, you tenderly woke Kili up.

He stretched then his eyes popped open, “Good morning!”, he sat up energized and ready to conquer the day.

“Good morning!” You replied with a kind smile, ever impressed by his liveliness in the mornings, “Start packing, Bombur’s almost finished breakfast.”

He shuffled about beside you while you worked on the final half of your bracelet, waiting for breakfast.

The porridge was the usual white sludge meant for nutrients, not flavor. You rinsed the dishes in the river with Kili’s animated storytelling as you usually did after meals. Thorin had the company moving out when you returned.

The day’s walk was very scenic, mostly idyllic forests with little rivers, where the lighting truly brought it all together. You walked between Kili and Fili so they could give you the basic run-down of sword handling and bowmanship.

By the end of midday, the company was on the border of the forest and a field. Thorin decided to make camp there and told Gloin to make the fire while Nori, Bifur, and Oin set traps in the forest to restock the reserves or something, you weren’t listening, too focused on Kili’s hand in yours as he led you somewhere.

The extra sparkle in his gorgeous brown eyes told you he was very excited to teach you about archery. As the resident Archer, no one (his brother) could compete for your attention by correcting him. He was also excited to watch you use his bow and his arrows; an honor bestowed upon an extremely select group.

Kili was very protective of his bows, not just because of the time it takes to make such an incredibly valuable weapon, but because one time in his youth he worked for weeks carving a brand-new bow from solid wood, making the string by hand, and engraving runic talismans into the handle. He worked very hard on that bow; Only to have one of his snot-nosed neighbors snatch it from him while they were playing and accidentally snap it in half after a misstep. Kili was furious, absolutely inconsolable. Fili had to drag him from the scene of the crime to the forest behind their family house, so he didn’t hunt the kid down and destroy him. He didn’t say anything to Fili, just cursed and milled about the clearing in frustration. At first, his brother didn’t know what he was doing, concerned he was setting a malicious trap for the offending child (such a spiteful trap was almost sprung after another incident of the same nature); but as Fili silently watched, out of arm’s punching reach of course, he realized his brother was just looking for a piece of wood to make a new bow. Fili built a fire to keep the chill of the setting sun at bay, not wanting to abandon his brother to the coming night. He watched the younger mumble curses in dwarfish as he whittled the wood seemingly in his own little world. Kili hadn’t really taken notice of the fire his brother built despite using its light and occasionally throwing more wood on absentmindedly while he stayed up all night to make the string and engrave the handle. Their mother, Dis, saw them through the window in the back door in the middle of the night. Fili was sitting on the ground, relaxed, leaning against a tree while he watched his brother on the other side of the blazing fire, Kili was sitting on a rock hunched over his bow as it came together. Dis knew from that moment Fili would always look after his little brother, or at the very least try his best. The craftsmanship of the bow he made that night was nowhere near his previous bow, but it could still shoot the straightest arrow in the village. It would do till he grew again and needed a bigger one.

Kili brought you a few yards away from the camp, out of ear shot but not out of sight. After the crash course in archery during the day’s walk, you were as prepared as you could be. Kili carved a target into the trunk of a tree with his dagger, not worried about losing misfired arrows in the underbrush because the fletching on the end of all his arrows were bright yellow.

He situated you both at a reasonable distance from the target and demonstrated again how to place your fingers on the string and what position to be in when you pull the string back. When he handed you the bow you were not expecting it to be as heavy as it was. Without an arrow, you tried to pull the string back like he showed but you couldn’t move it. You looked at Kili.

“Just pull it back Y/N.” He encouraged, with a proud little smile on his face.

“I am, Kee,” you said still straining to pull it. It wouldn’t budge. He thought for a moment, trying to figure out what could be wrong—Ah! He got it!

“Here, let me help.” He came up and stood behind you. “The draw weight for my bow must be too high for you,” he said into your ear in a low hushed tone while he got into position. He shuffled his legs behind yours and placed his hand below yours on the handle and his fingers above and below your slimmer, softer ones on the string. They were much stronger and much thicker than yours. Two of your fingers were the same width as one of his, a thought that quickly had you blushing. The irresistible mental image of moaning out for him while being deliciously stretched around his capable digits as he cooed praises, was nearly too much. You thanked God he was behind you and therefore couldn’t see your bright red face.

He let you do most of the work pulling the bowstring to allow you to get a feel for the mechanics and amount of potential energy the movement created.

“And…” he made sure you were ready, “Release.”

You both let go of the string at the same time.

“Perfect! Now let’s try it with an arrow” He got one from the quiver on his back and handed it to you.

You nocked the arrow like he taught you then got into position. He helped you pull the string back like before, allowing you to control the aim.

“Ready…” You said to him this time, “Release!”

The arrow flew across the field and landed smack in the middle of the bullseye!

“No way,” Kili said in complete disbelief. You both went over to inspect the target. Sure enough, the arrow was deep in the carved circle of the tree.

“That’s amazing Y/N!” He turned to you with the biggest smile you’d ever seen. You were as happy as him, jumping up and down excitedly.

“I want to try again!” You walked over to your previous spot and lined yourself up, waiting for him to join you. He chuckled at your enthusiasm and grabbed another arrow on the way over. You repeated the process like a practiced dance, enjoying more than anything that he was your partner. He allowed you to aim again, but this time the arrow didn’t hit its mark or the tree at all; It planted itself firmly into the leaf-covered underbrush.

“Awe,” you pouted, “I rushed, next time I’ll take my time.” You grabbed another arrow from his quiver, accidentally getting your face in his. For a moment, you could feel the heat of his lips and his breath tumbling over onto your own in a near ragged pant.

When you backed away you both politely laughed it off, though you could have sworn he leaned closer to you in that brief moment.

You shot all the arrows he had in his quiver. A handful hit the target, and a few even got close to the bullseye, but none hit the center like the first. Being a good coach, he encouraged and teased when the time was right.  

Once again in your own little world, it was like nothing mattered except him. His radiant smile, his contagious laughter, his excitability; it was all consuming. As the day wore on, your arms got tired, and you were ready for a break. You helped him collect the arrows in and around the tree, so he could show off for a bit like boys do for pretty girls. He did trick shots and action shots and even pinned the pinecone you threw for him to the tree. His skills were very impressive. Your return to the camp was met with impressed exclamations.

“Was that a bullseye on the first shot?!” Bofur asked, having seen the miracle even from the other side of the camp.

“Aye!” You said excitedly, proud of your accomplishment. You didn’t even realize that you were beginning to use their dialect.

“Good job lass!” Oin said, along with the others happily celebrating with you.

After all that working out, you were hungry for a snack. You rummaged through your bag in search of the grapes you had foraged with Bilbo the day before. They weren’t in your bag where you left them, carefully wrapped in your old T-shirt.

‘They couldn’t have fallen out’ you thought as you scanned the camp for the thief, already having an idea of the culprit. You stopped when your eyes fell on Kili across the camp, leaning against a tree with a shit-eating grin as he popped a grape into his mouth.

You were livid. It was a total invasion of your only private property: your bag, and you felt extremely violated.

You couldn’t say anything to the offending dwarf or even look at him in fear of your rage exploding onto him. The camp fell silent as you walked to Kili, your anger evident from your expression.

That feeling in Kili’s chest sunk to his boots when he saw how angry you were; he knew he’d gone too far. You snatched the grapes from his hand and walked (stomped) into the field beyond the camp.

“Y/N wait—” he tried to follow you into the field.

“NOT NOW KILI” you snapped at him over your shoulder in a tone he didn’t quite think you were capable of. He stopped in his tracks at your tone, the same one his mother used when she was very cross with him. The other members of the company who heard the commotion snickered at Kili’s self-inflicted misfortune.

You sat in the field, soaking up the sunshine and eating your grapes while you calmed down. Kili moped around camp like an abandoned puppy; it was quite a pitiful sight.

When you finished your snack, you took a few deep breaths to get the anger from your system and allow your thoughts to come together to properly explain to Kili why you were so mad. The youngest Durin hesitantly joined you in the field when he saw you were done with your grapes, his footfalls crunching the grass beneath him alerting you to his presence. He sat next to you clearly a little nervous by how he picked at the grass.

“I’m sorry,” he said, looking at the ground. “It was just supposed to be a joke, honest,”

“Joke or not, Kili Durin, you shouldn’t have gone through my stuff!” You wanted to make sure he understood how unhappy his actions made you. He cringed at his full name. “You violated the only sliver of privacy I have out here!”

“Sorry, Y/N,” he said in a regretful voice you’d never heard from him before. “I shouldn’t have gone through your bag.”

You sighed and looked over at him. “I forgive you Kili,” You took another deep breath, satisfied he’d learned his lesson, “Just don’t do it again, ok?”

He smiled, happy to be back on good terms with you, “I won’t, I promise”. You smiled too, his infectious charm melting what little remained of your anger. You leaned in for a hug, knowing you both needed physical reassurance.

He sat with you in the field for a while, content to stay in comfortable silence. You’d been eyeing a beautiful patch of flowers a few feet away since you’d sat down. You shifted so you were laying on your stomach to get a closer look at their vibrant hues and decided you wanted to use them, but how? Kili moved next to you, mirroring our position, to see what you were looking at. Then inspiration struck.

“I’ll braid them into your hair!” You said excitedly. He gave you a look of surprised confusion.

“What?! No!” he was immediately against the idea and even backed away from you as if you’d jump on him any second like his brother might, “Why don’t I put them in your hair instead? They’d look much better on you.” He desperately tried to come up with a reason to avoid the inevitable onslaught of mocking he’d have to endure if he agreed to your plan.

You brought yourself to a kneel so you could look him dead in the eyes with a blank expression, “Pussy,” you simply said.

He scoffed and got all huffy and puffy, “I am not a pussy!” He said defensively, his cute accent got thicker when he was flustered, it made it so hard to take him seriously, “I just think the flowers would make you even more beautiful than you already are.”

You blushed deeply at his words and looked away from his charming little smile to keep your thoughts from your more baser mindset and to think over his offer. He started twirling the end of one of the braids he’d done the night before between his fingers. It was a sweet and absentminded motion, to which you relented with a sigh, “Alright, but you have to teach me how to use a sword after.”

“Deal!” He gave a hearty nod. You got your hair stuff from your bag and your bracelet to work on and hopefully finish while Kili did your hair. You picked the prettiest flowers and put them in the extra fabric of your shirt like a delicate basket. He dragged over a stone to sit on and got to work undoing the braids and brushing your hair out.

You didn’t realize how tight he’d made the braids till the tension was released from your scalp. You sighed in pleasured relief as he moved your hair around with the brush. That sound immediately pricked his ears.

“Does that feel good, princess?” He looked down at you and smiled as he massaged the sore parts of your head. You were too lost in the feeling his skilled hands were creating to hear his pet name.

Once he massaged the soreness away, he parted your hair and began braiding. Kili had a vision of what he wanted to do to your hair. He wanted a thick band like a crown around the top of your head and four small thin braids scattered across the rest of your loose unbraided hair.

You were on an entirely different plane of existence. You felt so calm and relaxed and taken care of with his undivided attention, it was like nothing you’d ever felt before. His tranquil voice when he asked for a flower every now and then was the only thing you could hear.

When Kili was putting on the finishing touches, Fili came and joined you in the field to see what you both were doing, sadly breaking you from your lovely state of mind.

“Kili wouldn’t let me put flowers in his hair.” You pouted after the older brother inquired about your change in hairstyle.

“Even after he rummaged through your bag!” Fili feigned offense on your behalf with a smirk as he laid on his side in front of you both propped up on his elbow.

“Shut up, Fili” Kili huffed, ashamed of his previous actions, as he carded his fingers through your loose hair to make sure it was laying properly.

“Awe, Kiwi’s embawwassed,” you said in a baby-talk voice, making you and Fili laugh a little.

Kili stopped combing his fingers through your hair and tangled them in the loose hair at the back of your head. He pulled your head down to make you look up at him looming over you. He was about to say something, but the inadvertent dominating gesture caused an involuntary moan to slip past your lips, stalling any thoughts he tried to voice.

You were both stuck in that trance for just a moment, yet it took an eternity to pass. He was unable to look away from your pleasure pinched eyebrows and slightly parted panting lips. You were captivated by his handsome blushing features and the fire in his eyes. You wanted so desperately to kiss him, to meet his lips in heated passion.

“Good gods you two,” Fili rolled his eyes. His sudden interruption snapped Kili back to reality so he could release your hair. “Get a room,” Fili finished his statement.

“Shut up, Fili,” you both said in unison with faces equally ablaze and eyes cast anywhere but at each other. The elder just looked at you two and laughed to himself, he knew at that moment you were both madly in love.

“Here’s your brush, Y/N.” Kili handed it to you, wanting to change the subject.

“Yes, thank you” You took it from him and hastily returned it to your bag then met Kili back in the field for sword training. His brother was still there passively observing (waiting till he had to step in to correct the younger as this was not Kili’s area of expertise).

Bilbo allowed you to borrow his sword so you could get an idea of what a properly fitted one felt like without your wrists being torn to shreds by the other much heavier swords of the company. Kili walked you through basic moves and positions to teach you how to make your weapon like an extension of your own body. When he tried to speed up the movements and have you come at him in mock battle, you faltered and messed up the arrangement of poses.

When this happened, Fili of course would step in with a simplified version to help you. Before long, you had an audience, and the watchful eyes and extensive fighting prowess of Thorin and Dwalin. Kili was no longer the teacher but the sentient-sparing mannequin. The sequence of positions and movements became longer the more you worked at it. It felt amazing to be capable of so much. You knew it was just choreography, but it made you better now than you were before.

You were beginning to sweat under your thick tunic. The physical exertion was getting to Kili as well. When you took a water break you removed your shirt, the coffee brown padded camisole you wore underneath being far more breathable, but much tighter than your usual outerwear. It left hardly anything to the imagination.

Your less-dressed return to the now-stamped-down grass of the makeshift training area was met with impressed exclamations, wolf whistles, and light applause. You blushed and pretended to be a fashion model at the end of a runway. They found it very amusing.

Kili came back after wondering what the commotion was about.

He saw you waiting for him, you hadn’t noticed him approaching yet, too busy putting on a silly little show. He loved seeing you like this, confident and carefree, not worrying about how you looked and focusing on something that was far more rewarding: having fun. He used the few seconds you were distracted to admire you. Your half up half down hair he’d just braided and styled, was blowing softly in the wind, and your short unruly baby hairs were matted to your sweaty forehead giving you a halo of sorts. Your camisole highlighted the alluring curve from your ribs to your hips like nothing Kili had seen before. The hem of the fabric was ridding up on your waist, revealing just a sliver of your lower tummy. Your pants kept where they were, hugging tight to your thighs and bottom.

‘Two can play that game’ Kili thought, not even trying to hide his mischievous smile. He took his shirt off and threw it in his bag.

You looked up and saw him coming to meet you. The long bangs that framed his face were clinging to it now from his perspiration. He was smirking, knowing he caught you slightly off guard. His prominent pectoral muscles bled into his strong thick arms. His waist tapered into his hips where his pants were beginning to ride low, revealing his defined adonis belt in its retreat. He exuded power as he walked towards you with his arms out a bit from his side, and his palms facing you, as if he were accepting your challenge.

“Ohho, it’s serious now, is it?” you said over a light chuckle, feigning being taken aback by his friendly challenge.

“Oh, it sure is.” He returned your light laugh and with a smug expression he tapped his sword against yours where it hung at your side. He knew he was flustering you. He could see it in the deepened flush that colored your cheeks and how your thumb picked at the leather-covered hilt of your sword.

You had to bite the inside of your lip rather hard to keep your eyes above his exposed shoulders. It had been so long since you’d felt so physically and mentally attracted to someone. The way he was looking at you made your panties dampen at the scandalous thoughts that his honeyed chocolate eyes made race through your head.

If Thorin hadn’t said, “Ready positions”, in that barking tone of his, you’d have jumped Kili’s bones and rode him off into the sunset.

You both got into the starting positions you preferred. Thorin shouted ‘Commence’ in Dwarfish. Kili came at you with harsh blows, which you perfectly countered like you’d been taught. You were able to quickly move yourself, so you were standing at his side. You took the opening and swung for his exposed ribs, but he easily blocked your attack. You pressed your blade against his to force him back and give up some ground. He stood steadfast in his heavy boots, however, and pushed back against you, getting his face close to yours to tease you.

“Good job, you remembered how to keep your grip on the sword.” He said with mock celebration. You gritted your teeth, determined to keep your footing. He glanced at your lips where your teeth were worrying your lower lip; A habit he noticed when you were focused or nervous.

“I’ve been taught well, Archer.” You shot back, as suave as you could manage under the conditions. He threw you back so he could reset his stance.

“We’ll see about that, Ibinê,” he said, flustering you again with that mischievous grin as his native language easily rolled off his tongue.

You charged at him, and your blades collided with a loud metallic clang. Your sudden advance surprised him, he backed up a few steps. Cheers came from your audience.

“Ibinê?” You strained while your blades met again in a brute force pressing match. “What does that mean?”

Kili shoved you back and swiftly turned around, a trick he hadn’t yet revealed in your spar. He abandoned his blade somewhere off to the side and turned around again but crouched in his movement so he could swipe your legs from beneath you. You fell to the ground with a muted thud, your weapon knocked from your grasp. Kili scrambled to straddle your hips, pinning down your legs with his and your wrists above your head. You tried to fight against him, but his strength and weight are much greater than yours.

He panted above you, smiling like a cat who got the canary, “If only it were you straddling me,” he whispered under his breath and winked at you discreetly. Your chest was heaving, making your breasts ebb and flow with the rhythm. The erotic tension was palpable between you.

“We have a victor!” someone said from the sidelines to break your daze. Kili blushed and stood and helped you from the ground. Your audience clapped a little then dispersed to the camp a few feet away. You leisurely walked away from the encampment along the edge of the forest to catch your breath. The extra sway in your hips enticed Kili to follow you. He walked beside you, you looked up at him delighted he got the hint and followed you. He leaned in close to say in a voice that was deeper than normal, “Ibinê means my gem.” His words took a moment to register, causing a delayed blush to color your chest and neck.

He bit his lip as a thought played behind his eyes. Growing bold from the adrenaline still in his veins, he wrapped his hand around yours, he picked up speed till he was running. He took you far from the others. The sun was setting, painting the sky in those vivid colors only seen at dusk and dawn.

Kili slowed to a stop and used his grip on your hand to bring you in front of him. He took a step into your personal space.

“Labathmizi means I adore you.” He gingerly placed his hand on your cheek like he was handling the thinnest, most precious glass in the world. You were blushing profusely, your gaze danced from his eyes to his lips. “Abnâmulzi means you are beautiful.” He pecked his lips against yours for a moment then backed you against a tree and pinned you against it with his strong hand on your hip. His voice was low and rough with arousal, “Azralizi du-nâmrul, Ibinê, means I want to fuck you, my gem.” He pressed his lips to yours in a kiss that surpassed any expectation you had. His lips were soft against yours; his hand tenderly held your cheek. You lifted your leg over his hip, his hand moved to from your hip to your thigh, and it felt like it was searing into the cloth covered skin. It slid up to your ass cheek and urged you to grind against him. You whimpered as his hardening member pressed against your soaking core. Kili met your movements, making himself hiss at the delicious friction you were both craving.

When you broke the kiss for air as lust flooded your mind and loins, “That’s really hot” was all you could manage.

You were becoming addicted to his kiss. The way his thumb would glide against your cheek and the soft, barely there little whimpers he was making as you deepened the kiss were driving you mad with need.

Your hand was on his bare shoulder and the other tangled in his hair scratching and pulling lightly on the soft brown tresses. His tongue won its fight against yours when he gyrated his hips perfectly to grind into you, causing a moan to bubble from you.

He broke away, panting. He looked at you, suddenly silent with his eyebrows pinched in a sudden focused confusion. This immediately concerned you.

You opened your mouth to ask if he was ok, but he put his finger to his lips to silence you. He closed his eyes to focus on something; dwarfs and their connection to the environment around them still confused you.

His eyes shot open in a panic, and he tore himself away from you so he could pick you up bridal style.

You clung to him as he broke out in a dash back to camp, “A pack of orc’s are coming.”  

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Taglist <3: @letmelickyoureyeballs, @nessarosefiction, @akari-rioan

[fili-urzudel]

Dating Fíli Headcanons

More headcanons, lucky you!! I figured before I get too big of a collection I might want to post some content about the namesake of this blog lol.

Warnings: None

Word Count: 0.4k

- Y'all ever heard of The Belly (TM)?

- Literal heaven on earth cuddling with this man

- He is THEE best cuddler because: 1) bear 1a) belly 1b) hairy 2) he bathes regularly and makes an effort to smell good (look at that face and tell me he doesn't smell like lavender and thyme)

- He's more likely to fall for dwarrowdams than his brother, probably because he's just always been more appealing to his own folk

- He prizes how interesting and captivating a potential partner is over their rank, much to his family's chagrin (cue Kili aggressively cheering him on)

- He's a very diligent student, and the more cautious of the two brothers

- That's why he takes a while observing you from afar and making sure that he won't be wasting your time if he asks to court you

- That same studiousness makes him very attractive to you

- If he didn't know before, he quickly learns to cook at an artisan/Bombur level to impress you

- He plays the fiddle very skillfully, though he relies on you to come up with new tunes for him to serenade you with

- He loves to read, and if you do too, he will fall HARD when you can discuss the books you read together

- He learned to dance to impress at balls, but he takes to twirling you and waltzing with you in hallways, often early in the morning or late at night when no one else is around

- He definitely spends most of his time forging, however--where do you think all those knives came from?

- You'll have a whole collection before you even get married, with a few gauntlets/bracelets/necklaces in there somewhere

- He gets a huge confidence boost from you oohing and ahhing over his muscles, which thankfully you do often

- One form of affection you both share is playing with each other's hair--it's a perfect way to get each other to relax after long days

- Naps naps naps naps naps naps

- Once again, I cannot emphasize this enough: most ideal and best pillow because he is warm and soft and also he loves you what more could you ask for

[distinguisheddwarffriend]

Today on Hobbit-Headcanons:

What would the company of Thorin Oakenshield enjoy about the Modern World?

One of my WIP transports the company to our world shortly before they're supposed to reach Rivendell, and into the apartment of my OFC.

So here is a list of things I think each character would enjoy about the Modern World:

Thorin: Google Maps, Siri (will totally argue with her like she's real), Shows like The Crown, Game of Thrones, but also Bridgerton, Democracy (yes you read that correctly), Rock music

Fili: Birth Control (can finally fuck around without risking the royal lineage), Superhero Movies (has an huuuhe crush on Black Widow), Tinder, Martial Arts, Feminism, Henley shirts to show of his muscles, bars & clubs

Kili : TikTok (LOVES cat videos, Top Content Creator about Archery, 'deep thoughts'/rambling, 'prank my uncle/brother with me', does EVERY challenge, accidental thirsttraps & flustered by the comments), Parkour, Man Buns & (Hipster-) Fashion, LGBTQ+ - Community , karaoke bars, team sports, the zoo

Bofur: modern music (especially pop songs with dirty lyrics), Tumblr (is no. 1 shit-poster), music festivals, arts&crafts blogs, Christopher's Streets Day

Bifur: Google Translate, Modern Medicine, Pain Medication, ASL, RomComs (trust me), helps out in an animal shelter, country music

Bombur: Cooking Shows (has his own Online Show), Kindergarten (he had so many children, the reprieve would be SO appreciated), international foodstuff to try

Dwalin: Guns, MMF, store-bought cookies, sport shows (AGRESSIVE fan for whatever team he randomly picks), Barbecues

Balin: Twitter (the political possibilities!!!), mental healthcare (he's sending the whole line of Durin he had no time for their shit), Spa Days, public schools, classical music

Oin: Modern Medicine (Duh), hearing aids, physiotherapy

Gloin: bitcoins, the stock market, Facebook (posts daily about Gimli)

Dori: hair tutorials, fashion shows, tracking devices (has totally microchipped a drunk Nori at some point)

Nori: hacking, movies with the lovable rogue as the MC (Pirates of the Carribbean, Deadpool etc.), spy movies (duh), the mafia (yes, he becomes a boss within weeks)

Ori: Wikipedia, public libraries, tutorials for EVERYTHING (knitting, cutting your own hair, how to talk to royalty, fancy war cries, you name it), fantasy novels, public schools

Bilbo: Food blogs, the "ignore call"-button, Instagram, university (will mayor in at least three subjects), museums

Gandalf: the Internet as a whole, email/ instant messaging, yard sales, modern weed, museums (has a knack for finding cursed items), adventure movies (after watching Indiana Jones he seriously debated obtaining a whip)

[shirefantasies]

Heyyy i just wanna say that I LOVE your writing. Its so so comforting 🫶🫶🫶

Can I request a story/headcanon about how Thorins company/ specifically Kíli would react if (fem) reader got her hair braided by her (non dwarf) friend, and it was just a friendly thing, but the dwarves thought it was a courting braid?

Pairing Fem!Reader x Kíli

Thank youu🫶💗

Omg thanks! Comfort writing is a big honor 🥹

Mission of Misunderstanding- Kili x F!Human!Reader

Shout-out to my girlies in the unbraidable hair community lmao 🤝 Warnings: one minor swear lol, a couple suggestive remarks

One more step and your feet were going to fall off. Surrendering to the burn, you all but fell down onto the log, tilting your feet so only your heels rested upon the earth. A sigh escaped your lips and you didn’t even move when the rustling sounded at your back.

A familiar voice spoke your name. Bilbo. “Are you quite alright?”

“Yes, my friend,” you breathed, “so long as you don’t count anything below the knee. Or my hair. Can’t imagine how much dirt and leaves have gotten in it after all that.”

"Well, yes," Bilbo chided, ever the little mother-hen, "you've got to keep it back. Why don't I braid it for you?"

Your heart burst, and not from exertion this time. "You would do that for me?"

"Of course," the hobbit shrugged, "haven't had much practice of it of late, but certainly I can give it a go for you. I understand. I wouldn't want the mess either. Come here."

Thanking him again, you scooted closer to where Bilbo stood, gritting your teeth for the pain of him detangling your hair, only to relax at the gentle touch of his nimble fingers. Eyelids fluttering shut in contentment, you sat as Bilbo worked his magic neatening your hair up and making fresh braids of it for you. Feet still elevated and aching, but less so the longer you sat off of them. When the hobbit pulled back with a quiet, still-focused finished, your first instinct was to reach up around your head, touching the new set of braids with a widening smile.

"And now it shall be free of my face! Truly, thank you, Bilbo!" Pulling him into a quick hug, you vowed to repay him somehow with a teasing final statement. "Since I doubt you want me to braid yours."

"That is quite alright, thank you," he chuckled, "let's head back to camp before Bombur chases us down, eh?”

Camp was nearby, and still sparsely populated as you approached it. Bofur and Bombur were there building a fire, and Thorin stood a ways aside having a conversation with Balin. Dwalin and Gloin sat playing a game with a rock as their table, and Ori sat knitting. The others, you presumed, were hunting, saddling ponies, or else getting attention from Oin. Thinking nothing of it you sat down again, this time near Dwalin and Gloin, asking who was winning and if they were taking bets just to laugh at their responses. Bilbo helped Bofur and Bombur get set up for dinner a few feet off, propping up sticks strong enough to hold the cooking pot.

Sure enough, the rest of the company began trickling in, Oin, Bifur, and Nori first, the latter two with poultices and bandages. You winced. Perhaps you should complain less about your feet. Next up came Dori and Fili, who each carried one half of a felled deer, shot clearly with one of Kili's arrows. The younger prince had a bag in hand, likely having won whatever silly game determined who got the lightest load. Smiling and meeting his eyes, you gave a quick wave, indicating your amusement at the game behind you with your eyes.

Kili smiled back and waved, then swiveled his head away and back again in a double-take. You found yourself frowning as he averted his gaze to help his brother, blinking as you wondered what that was about. All you'd done was say hello. Not even say, really. Did he think you were making fun of the others?

Perhaps it was nothing, but considering your feelings for the prince, it was everything in your mind. Cycling ideas began overtaking your brain like mist. Had he suspected malice of your joke? Had he simply heard something? Why had his expression shifted so? Maybe he was just worried by what he heard.

~

"What did I miss while we were gone?"

At Kili's words, Dwalin simply frowned, peering at him like he'd thoroughly lost his marbles. "What do ya mean, lad?"

"Did...did anything happen?"

"Took Gloin for a right fool on the card table," the older dwarf replied with a smug look, chest puffing and shoulders widening.

"No," the prince shook his head, "not with you, with..."

Despite the way he trailed off, Dwalin gave him a knowing smirk, crossing his tattooed arms. "Ah, I see," he nodded, "not with me, not with me at all. With the lass, eh? Why, she didn’t greet you with a kiss?”

Having an older brother really steeled one to teasing. Much as Kili wanted to fight, to protest and say oi, quit that or I’ll make you, he knew it was exactly the rise Dwalin would’ve wanted to get from him. Beside the other fact that his elder could kick his ass easily.

“‘Course not,” he replied nonchalantly as he could, “I just noticed someone had braided her hair was all.”

Even Dwalin had cause for surprise at that, dark eyebrows shooting up to his metaphorical hairline. “Just since this morning?”

“Yeah,” Kili replied, trying not to sound as deflated as the words made him feel, knocking the air clean out of him now that he’d said them out loud, “thought maybe you’d seen who did it.”

“Hadn’t even crossed my mind, but I think it was like that when she and Bilbo headed back to camp.”

“Bilbo?” He’d lose to a three and a half foot…grocer? “Well now, I’d not have expected that, eh?”

“I can tell ye don’t actually want to laugh, son.”

Sighing, he finally let himself deflate. Bilbo? You and Bilbo?

~

“I hardly see them talk that much. Do you?”

“Not nearly enough to warrant a marriage. Those take time.”

“I know, Fee.”

“Spark.”

“I know.”

“And I thought you two had it. Not even just saying that because you’re my brother. You know I’m honest with you. The only reason those two would have is both feeling like outsiders, and that hardly seems cause to f-”

“Thank you, Fili, yes. Perhaps I was just wrong. Perhaps she could never have loved me after all. She wasn’t my One.”

“Now, brother,” grabbing him by the cheeks with one hand, Fili pulled his younger brother’s gaze to meet his, “not so hasty. Have you talked to either of them yet?”

“Wasn’t ready,” he mumbled, shaking out of the squishing grasp.

“Well, perhaps you should. Knowing is pain, yes, but it is also the thing that keeps us going in the end.”

Kili dropped his gaze thoughtfully before meeting his brother’s eye again, smiling faintly. “Remember our old espionage days? Maybe it’s time we had another mission.”

“Alright,” Fili nodded and smiled, “for old times’ sake.”

~

“Well hello there, Master Burglar.”

“Whatever it is, I won’t fall for it.”

“Now, now, so dry and for what?” Fili wrapped an arm around the hobbit. “I was just wondering how you you were coming along with…a certain member of the company.”

At that, the hobbit’s face crumpled in disgust. By Fili’s reckoning, Master Bilbo seemed barely interested in romance and certainly not with any of the types he currently ran with. He needed someone more doilies and dishcloths and the lot. You may have been the closest to his type, but still far too much of an edge, far too much indeed.

“I beg your pardon?” Bilbo simply replied.

With a conspiratorial wink, Fili leaned in and whispered your name, glancing back to the hobbit’s eyes, which narrowed slightly. Suspicious.

“Uh, w-well I would say,” Bilbo stuttered, shrugging lightly, “well as we could be, all things considered.”

“All things considered?” Fili’s grip tightened a bit. “There are things to be considered?”

“There are plenty of things to be considered!” The burglar shot back. “Why, is she upset with me? Last I heard, she liked the braids and I made her feel much more comfortable. Have I done something today?”

Blue eyes closing to near-slits, Fili released his grip entirely, arm falling back to his side. “Did she ask you to arrange her hair?”

“She complained about it,” Bilbo replied, shimmying in his newfound freedom and using his released arm to slide his pack closer, “so I offered to do something about it. Can’t imagine that is much of an outrage…oh. Oh, good heavens! No! Oh, no. No. She could be my daughter, who on earth sent you over here to…?”

Blonde brows raising, Fili’s head shot back in surprising hard enough to send his mustache braids swinging. “Wait, so you do know about courting braids?”

“Gloin was just telling me all about his,” the hobbit replied, freezing in place even in spite of his awkward, hunched-into-his-pack-hands-deep posture, “neither of us thought a thing about it. Privately I was hoping she and Kili would do whatever it was to get the tension out there, you know?”

Fili did know. He knew, all right.

~

“Psst! Psst! Hoo! Hoo! Caw!”

Kili’s head snapped up at the sound, dark eyes meeting his brother’s fair head popping from the scraggly bushes surrounding camp. One gloved hand waved wild beckoning at the younger prince. Rising from the rock he’d sat down on, one with a strategic view of some conversation between you, Uncle Thorin, and Balin, Kili strode to the edges of camp.

“Reconnaissance successful,” his older brother hissed.

“What?” Jaw dropping, Kili felt his hands leave his chest and clench in surprise. “That was fast. Nothing for me to do?”

“Not true, brother. Not true at all,” Fili smiled, “your part is far more important. You have to go talk to her.”

With a sigh, Kili nodded despite the heavy clunk of his heart in his chest. All the childhood playtimes were nice and all, but at the end of the day he had to be a dwarf about things. Face his fears, just like Uncle Thorin and his father and even Fili.

“You’re right. Though I dread it in my heart, I must speak to her. Even if my love is never known.”

“I wish you the greatest of luck,” Fili patted his shoulder, smiling eagerly, “and trust me. She won’t do a single thing to hurt you. I know it. Alright?”

Another nod. “Alright.”

Inhale, exhale. One step, then another. It was hard sometimes. Putting on the bravado. Fili was always so capable and Uncle had high standards. Not that he shouldn’t, but…it just got easier to act unafraid of everything. In truth, there was much Kili didn’t understand. Much he feared. Perhaps even his own heart, and that was why he had allowed himself to play games with it for so long. No longer, though.

Crunching across the dry campsite ground, he marched up to you as your conversation ended and asked to speak with you, frowning slightly at the nod Balin and Thorin exchanged. Focusing instead on your gaze, the way your eyes were intent in his and the-admittedly quite adorable-way shock bloomed across your face before giving way to a smile and a nod.

“Of course,” you said, and that was that.

How was it that one little smile from you could simultaneously calm Kili's heart and set it leaping like nothing else? There truly was no denying that you were special. Perhaps Bilbo had seen what was so dazzlingly obvious, too. Guess that wasn't too much of a shock.

You both ventured toward the tree line, stopping next to a particularly sturdy trunk. Eagerness was written across your face as you leaned against the smooth bark, encouraging Kili with a smile he couldn't help faintly mirroring even as tears swam in his eyes.

"Are congratulations in order?"

"For me?" You asked, head tilting and hand reaching to your chest. "Forgive me, but what are you asking? I thought maybe I'd upset you last night, but now I really fear it. Or are you teasing me again?"

All thought was scrubbed from Kili's brain at your words, a thick blanket of confusion draping over the prince's mind and furrowing his brows. Is this what Fili meant? Were you not to hurt him because you thought him cross with you? That hurt a bit in and of itself. Perhaps you'd known he would be jealous. But then again, you had greeted him so casually, giving him a cute little wave when he came back...

"Please," he all but begged your name, "the suspense is just killing me. Is that not a courting braid you've been given? I know it is new as of yesterday."

"Is that why you looked so perturbed? Courting...courting braid? Kili," you laughed, "my hair was full of sticks and leaves and all manner of muck, so Bilbo detangled it and got it out of my face for me! Bilbo could be my father!"

Still a bit shaky, but Kili's face surrendered a smile at the teasing smack you gave his upper arm. "Oh, forgive me for being a dwarf," he shot back, "I was hardly the only one who noticed."

"But you were the only one who was jealous," you teased him back, "is that not right?"

Kili could tell by the faltering smirk you gave, by the dart of your beautiful eyes, that you did not truly believe it, but by Mahal, you would when he was done with you.

"Madly," he agreed, eyes boring into yours, "never let anyone but me braid your hair again."

Eyebrows shooting up to your hairline, you peeled yourself from the tree as if to get a closer look. "Kili..."

"I mean it," he implored your name once more, gently taking your shoulders in his hands, "please. This isn't a joke, but if you'd like me to convince you..."

Surging forward, Kili closed the gap between you two, his lips soft against yours and stubble pleasantly tickling against your skin, which shifted as you moved in response to his kiss. Your hands found purchase in his hair, tangling in it and eliciting a sound Kili was too focused on you to be embarrassed about. When you finally pulled away for air, he pulled you back, resting his forehead against yours with a growing smile.

"So, you convinced?"

Your eyes glittered with mirth, joy, mischief...perhaps even love, and Kili knew he should have never doubted you were his One. "So convinced I practically want you to rip out all of Bilbo's work and do it over again yourself."

"You don't have to tell me twice."

Taglist: @lokilover476 @fuckyoumakeart @mossthebogwitch @ibabblealot @kilibaggins @joonies-word @stormchaser819 @pirate-lord-of-narnia @datglutengoblin | Reply/Ask/Message to join 🥰

[klarex]

I would love to dance and sing with him!

Genre: fluff

Warnings: none! Just a cute fic

Summary: Dancing around the campfire with Bofur.

Paring: Bofur x reader

Dance the night away

Pov. (Y/n)

The company stopped in the middle of the forest. The fire was lit. Bombur was cooking some stew. Everyone talked lively with smiles on their faces.

Today was a happy day. I didn't know why. It just felt like it. Maybe because we didn't get attacked today, or maybe the weather was nice? I had no idea.

I was sitting next to Dori, talking with him and laughing, while we waited for our supper. Bombur stirred the stew, and he tapped the spoon on the pot two times. I heard someone clap and tap their foot. I knew a song was coming.

Bofur stood up and started singing. Everyone stopped talking and looked at him. The smiles creeped on every person from the company. Some of the dwarves joined Bofur. He spun around the fire, singing a happy song. I laughed at a sweet moment, but then the singer stopped before me and pulled his hand out for me. He had this silly smile of his on his face.

- Ye mind dancin' with me?

He said with his thick accent, and I placed my hand in his. He pulled me up on my feet.

- No. Not at all.

I said and smiled. He spun me around, singing and laughing. We jumped from foot to foot, waving our hands. Now everyone was having fun.

When the song finished, Bombur stood up and poured the stew into our bowls. We all sat down and started eating in silence, but with smiles. The talks started after a while again.

Bofur was looking at me from across the fire. When I caught him staring, he looked away, blushing and focusing back on his supper.

After eating, the talks started growing again.

- Bofur! Sing us something again!

Ori said, and Nori nodded, hitting his thigh.

- Aye! Go on, lad!

Dwalin said, and Bofur laughed, leaning on his knee and standing up. He cleared his throat and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. He started singing and opened his eyes. Everyone looked at him and bounced in their seat, humming the tune. This time Fíli stood up and walked up to me, pulling his hand out. I grabbed it, and he helped me get up.

He spun me around and put his hand on my back while dancing. Then I felt a strong grip on my waist, and someone pulled me their way. I lost my balance and landed on their chest. I looked up and saw Bofur giving Fíli a death stare, but still singing.

I looked around and saw that no one paid attention to us. They just enjoyed themselves while singing, laughing, and dancing once again. Fíli walked away with a chucke and wink to Bofur. He blushed and looked down at me. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and he put his on my hips.

- Don't be jealous, Bof..

I whispered in his ear, and he shivered. He squeezed my hips and pulled me closer, if that was even possible. Other folks sang their hearts out, minding their own business. I put one of my hands behind his head and gently leaned in. I pecked his lips and gently pulled away, looking into his eyes.

- I'm only yours..

I whispered with a smirk. His cheeks dark red and eyes wide. It took him a second to process what happened. Then he passionately leaned in and kissed me hungrily, but softly. I kissed him back. His moustache lightly tickled me, and I laughed, pulling away. I looked at him with love and a warm smile. He smirked and quickly lifted me up in his arms.

- BOFUR!!

I shouted, putting my arms around his neck to secure myself from eventual fall. Everyone around the fire now looked at us. Bofur was laughing and spinning me around, joining others in singing again.

The night went on and on. Everyone got tired after a while, so we stopped dancing and singing, but the talks were still heard.

I was sitting next to Bofur, leaning on his shoulder. He had his arm wrapped around my waist. I tried to focus on the conversation between the dwarves, but it was hard, because of a warm body pressed to mine and exhaustion taking over me. I yawned, and Bofur looked down at me.

- Ye tired?

He asked with a smile. I nodded, and he wrapped his arms around me, lifting me up. He excused himself and walked to our bedrolls. He gently put me down, and I lay down. He kneeled next to me and wrapped a blanket around my body.

- Wait her'..

He said and slowly stood up. He walked up to his bedroll, took it, and walked back to me. He put it beside mine and lowered himself. He put his blanket over himself, but enough to cover us both.

When he lay down, I immediately hugged him tightly and nuzzled my face into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me tightly and kissed the top of my head.

- Goodnight, Bof..

I whispered, running my hands up to his neck. He kissed my head again.

- Goodnight, princess..

He whispered back, and we fell asleep, secured in each other's arms.

♡~masterlist~♡

[obsidiancreates]

He Was A Dwarf, He Was A Hobbit, Can I Make It Anymore Obvious

How can I be more obvious?

Thorin should probably be listening to the meeting more intently, but his mind can't help it's focus elsewhere.

He's given Bilbo armor of Mithril, not only a metal more valuable than any other single item in the treasury, but a piece of light weight and easy maneuverability, such as fits Bilbo's methods of fighting and defending.

He did so in front of the whole company, and professed that he trusted only Bilbo of all of them. Perhaps these were dismissed by the hobbit as acts of pure madness, which would be... more than fair, but Thorin had reiterated Bilbo's deserving of the gift many times after The Battle, to prove the act genuine.

He defends Bilbo at every turn, against any who dare question his place in Erebor. He's had plants and books and cookware and even soil itself brought over from Hobbiton specifically, after learning of the various Shire settlements. He's asked Bilbo about his family history many times, always prompting Bilbo to go on when the hobbit worried he'd become too long-winded.

Mahal knows those times were near brain-melting, with how each family branch came with several stories, and those stories came with stories, and how the family tree was really more a twisting vine that kept merging and then splitting off and merging again with other vines.

But he'd paid attention, and made sure to let Bilbo know by referencing some of those stories sometimes. And it always made Bilbo smile brightly, gleam brighter than any jewel, than even the Arkenstone itself.

And yet, Bilbo seems to remain under the impression that the only intent is friendship.

Even when Thorin asks him to weigh in on "Matters of the royal family". When Thorin says he considers Bilbo apart of the family.

So obviously, the question occupies him often.

How can I be more obvious?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bilbo angrily shoves another pie Bombur's way. Bombur looks at him.

"Not that I'm complain', Bilbo," he says, grabbing his fork. "But this is the third one, you know."

"Well aware," Bilbo huffs. "But the meat's too dry again. I'm still struggling with adjusting to cooking so far below ground."

"Is it that different from your smial?"

"You've no idea," Bilbo grumbles, rolling out more dough. "It may be under dirt, but under dirt is very different from under stone. Not to mention cooking with coal instead of wood. And the difference in grain types, herbs, even the texture of the meats are different."

"Can't get it to taste like home?"

"I'm not trying to make it for myself, I'm trying to perfect it for Thorin."

Bombur grins. "Really?"

"Mmm, he mentioned once the texture he prefers his meats to be in pies, and I haven't been able to get it right yet. If I was at home, it'd be perfect every time, mind you."

"Why're you so focused on that, then?" Bombur hopes this means Thorin will finally stop with his shameless and, frankly, desperate flirting.

"Trying to court him, obviously. But don't you dare tell him I said so!"

Bombur chokes on the pie. "What?!"

"No way to start a courtship, asking outright like that. Makes a bloody scene of everything," Bilbo mutters as he puts the new pie in to bake. "The things I would hear about Primula after she asked Drogo, just out in the open like that, ha! Good for them that it worked out, but I'm too old to risk that kind of humiliation now."

"Humiliation?"

"The gossip." Bilbo's tone is so somber that Bombur wonders if perhaps 'gossip' means in Hobbiton what 'beheadings' means in Erebor. "Everyone knowing you're trying to start a relationship with someone, it always breeds misery."

"How?"

"Well," Bilbo starts with a rueful chuckle, "Angry competition, for one! If everyone knows who everyone's after so obviously, things sour quick. Attempts to ruin the courtships, mainly. The lies Prim had to deal with, just unbelievable, all to try and drive Drogo away from her."

"There's that little respect for courtships?"

"On the surface, there's plenty. Behind one's back, though, that's when it becomes a dreadful business. Not to mention the risk of rejection. Better for a quiet one where nothing goes anywhere and things can stay amicable. If it's public, well." Bilbo shakes his head. "That always gets messy."

"You think Thorin would you reject you?"

"I've no idea. Which is exactly how I want it." Bilbo sits down. "As long as I continue with this path, Bombur, I might never have to have my heart broken."

"And... what if he doesn't know you're trying?"

"Same result."

"And you'd just never ask?"

"Nope."

"... How do you think dwarves court, then?"

"I heard something about gifts, I think. Three of them, right?"

"Usually, yeah." Like a Mithril shirt, for example. Or moving almost the whole of Hobbiton into the mountain. As to if that counts as one gift or as many, that depends on who you ask.

"And something about braids and beads, I believe."

"Right. Has Thorin asked to braid your hair?"

"No, of course not. I don't know if he could, actually." Bilbo frowns suddenly, and touches his hair. "It's a bit too short for dwarven braids, isn't it?"

"He could make do."

"Mmm... but we're talking as if he'll return the affection."

"What would he have to do, then? To return it?"

"Usually it's done quite slowly. Having something to give back when food is brought over, like having a tart ready at the table. Checking if they're low on anything, as well, which basically amounts to sharing one's kitchen. Offering to mend things that may need mending in return, and then after a bit insisting it's no trouble and no return needed. And sharing, that is what really makes it official. Especially if in public."

"Really?"

"Sharing a pie in public is as good as shouting it from the top of the hill."

"Never would've thought Hobbits to be subtle courters."

"Please," Bilbo huffs again. "If we were anything but, I assure you idle gossip sessions would end up more like what happens here after insulting someone's metalworking in the forges."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"That's the problem?" Kili groans and plops his forehead down onto the table. "Uncle's been going mad, and Bilbo's been flirting right back the whole time!"

"Why don't they just ask each other about courting rituals?" Fili says, throwing his hands up. "We're the ones suffering watching all of this!"

"Tauriel and I talked about all this ages ago," Kili says into the stone tabletop. "How has Uncle not realized Bilbo has no way of knowing Dwarf courting?"

"Should we tell him?"

"Someone has to, he'll never figure it out at this rate."

"Should someone tell Bilbo, also?"

"Can you imagine? Bilbo learning Uncle has been very publicly trying to court him this whole time? He'll die of shame!"

"He won't ever figure it out either, though."

"You tell Bilbo then, Fili. I refuse to watch him turn to smoke and ash when he finds out the whole mountain knows about this."