#Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies

[the-really-lonely-mountain]

To Erebor - Part 5

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Summary: Transported to Middle Earth, you must Join Thorin Oakenshield's Company as they travel to reclaim Erebor! OR: My take on the classic 'modern girl in Middle Earth' troupe. This is the second installment, so we are following the second movie of The Hobbit trilogy, and falling deeper in love with Kili on the way! This is the second part for the second movie.

Tags: Kili / Reader, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Modern Character in Middle Earth, During The Hobbit, How Do I Tag, Canon-Typical Violence, Kíli Is a Little Shit (Tolkien), implied soulmates, Dwarf Culture & Customs, Freeform, light smut, it's really just a brief description nothing too graphic but i certianly wouldn't want to be caught reading it, Holding Hands, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sleepy Cuddles, Protective Thorin Oakenshield Company Members, Dwalin & Thorin Oakenshield Friendship, Fluff and Humor, Domestic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Where In Middle-Earth Is Gandalf?, Hair Braiding, Dwarf Courting, My First Tumblr Fic, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fíli & Kíli & Thorin Live, Thorin Oakenshield Lives, Fíli Lives (Tolkien), Kíli Lives (Tolkien), sword fight training, kili is a big ole softy and i love him so much for it, tags tbd tbh lol

Word Count: 4,758

A/N: OMG!! I graduated! I got a job! I finally edited this part! I'm so tired y'all, I'm writing this author note at like midnight lol. ~AnywhoOOo~ I hope you enjoy! let me know if you'd like to join the tag list to be directly notified of chapter updates! <3

Divider credit: @cafekitsune

You woke to the usual clanging of pots and pans as breakfast was being cooked. Kili’s hand was still on your waist and his arm was still your pillow, though you were sure it’d gone numb in the night. You gently placed your hand on his cheek and tenderly ran your thumb over his delicate cheek bone. He looked so handsome sleeping beside you, it made you smile like a giddy little schoolgirl. You regretted having to remove yourself from his warm embrace, but you had to start packing your things and getting ready for the day. A much easier task now that you didn’t have to worry about your hair. When you were finished and your bag was neatly packed, you woke Kili.

He stretched his arms above his head then his eyes popped open, “Good morning!”, he sat up energized and ready to conquer the day.

“Good morning!” You replied with a kind smile, ever impressed by his liveliness in the mornings, “Start packing, Bombur’s almost finished breakfast.”

He shuffled about beside you while you worked on the last half of your bracelet, waiting for breakfast.

The porridge was the usual white sludge meant for nutrients, not flavor. You rinsed the dishes in the river with Kili’s animated storytelling as you usually did after meals. Thorin had the company moving out when you returned.

The day’s walk was very scenic, mostly idyllic forests with little rivers, where the lighting truly brought it all together. You walked between Kili and Fili so they could give you the basic run-down of sword handling and bowmanship.

By the end of midday, the company was on the border of the forest and a field. Thorin decided to make camp there and told Gloin to make the fire while Nori, Bifur, and Oin set traps in the forest to restock the reserves or something, you weren’t listening, too focused on Kili’s hand in yours as he led you somewhere.

The extra sparkle in his gorgeous brown eyes told you he was very excited to teach you about archery. As the resident Archer, no one (his brother) could compete for your attention by correcting him. He was also excited to watch you use his bow and his arrows; an honor bestowed upon an extremely select group.

Kili was very protective of his bows, not just because of the time it takes to make such an incredibly valuable weapon, but because one time in his youth he worked for weeks carving a brand-new bow from solid wood, making the string by hand, and engraving runic talismans into the handle. He worked very hard on that bow; Only to have one of his snot-nosed neighbors snatch it from him while they were playing and accidentally snap it in half after a misstep. Kili was furious, absolutely inconsolable. Fili had to drag him from the scene of the crime to the forest just behind their family house, so he didn’t hunt the kid down and destroy him. He didn’t say anything to Fili, just cursed and milled about the clearing in frustration. At first, his brother didn’t know what he was doing, concerned he was setting a malicious trap for the offending child (such a spiteful trap was almost sprung after another incident of the same nature); but as Fili silently watched, out of arm’s punching reach of course, he realized his brother was just looking for a piece of wood to make a new bow. Fili built a fire to keep the chill of the setting sun at bay, not wanting to abandon his brother to the coming night. He watched the younger mumble curses in dwarfish as he whittled the wood seemingly in his own little world. Kili hadn’t really taken notice of the fire his brother built despite using its light and occasionally throwing more wood on out of habit while he stayed up all night to make the string and engrave the handle. Their mother, Dis, saw them through the window in the back door in the middle of the night. Fili was sitting on the ground, relaxed, leaning against a tree while he watched his brother on the other side of the blazing fire, Kili was sitting on a rock hunched over his bow as it came together. Dis knew from that moment Fili would always look after his little brother, or at the very least try his best. The craftsmanship of the bow he made that night was nowhere near his previous bow, but it could still shoot the straightest arrow in the village. It would do till he grew again and needed a bigger one.

Kili brought you a few yards away from the camp, out of ear shot but not out of sight. After the crash course in archery during the day’s walk, you were as prepared as you could be. And excited as ever. Kili carved a target into the trunk of a tree with his dagger, not worried about losing misfired arrows in the underbrush because the fletching on the end of all his arrows were bright yellow.

He situated you both at a reasonable distance from the target and demonstrated again how to place your fingers on the string and what position to be in when you pull the string back. When he handed you the bow you were not expecting it to be as heavy as it was. Without an arrow, you tried to pull the string back like he showed but you couldn’t move it. You looked at Kili.

“Just pull it back Y/N.” He encouraged, with a proud little smile.

“I am, Kee,” you said still straining to pull it. It wouldn’t budge. He thought for a moment, trying to figure out what could be wrong—Ah! He got it!

“Here, let me help.” He came up and stood behind you. “The draw weight for my bow must be too high for you,” he said into your ear, his low hushed tone not going unnoticed as he got into position. He shuffled his legs behind yours and placed his hand below yours on the handle and his fingers above and below your slimmer, softer ones on the string. They were much stronger and much thicker than yours. Two of your fingers were the same width as one of his, a thought that quickly had you blushing. The irresistible mental image of moaning out for him while being deliciously stretched around his capable digits as he cooed praises, was nearly too much. You thanked god he was behind you and couldn’t see your bright red face.

He let you do most of the work pulling the bowstring to allow you to get a feel for the mechanics and amount of potential energy the movement created.

“And…” he made sure you were ready, “Release.”

You both let go of the string at the same time.

“Perfect! Now let’s try it with an arrow” He got one from the quiver on his back and handed it to you.

You nocked the arrow like he taught you then got into position. He helped you pull the string back like before, allowing you to control the aim.

“Ready…” You said to him this time, “Release!”

The arrow flew across the field and landed smack in the middle of the bullseye.

“No way,” Kili said in complete disbelief. You both went over to inspect the target. Sure enough, the arrow was deep in the carved center circle of the tree.

“That’s amazing Y/N!” He turned to you with the biggest smile you’d ever seen. You were as happy as him, jumping up and down excitedly.

“I want to try again!” You walked over to your previous spot and lined yourself up, waiting for him to join you. He chuckled at your enthusiasm and grabbed another arrow on the way over. You repeated the process like a practiced dance, enjoying more than anything that he was your partner. He allowed you to aim again, but this time the arrow didn’t hit its mark or the tree at all; It planted itself firmly into the leaf-covered underbrush.

“Awe,” you pouted, “I rushed, next time I’ll take my time.” You went to grab another arrow from his quiver, accidentally getting your face in his. For a moment, you could feel the heat of his lips and his breath tumbling over onto your own in a near ragged pant.

When you backed away you both politely laughed it off, though you could have sworn he leaned closer to you in that brief moment.

You shot all the arrows he had in his quiver. A handful hit the target, and a few even got close to the bullseye, but none hit the center like the first. Being a good coach, he encouraged and teased when the time was right.  

Once again in your own little world, it was like nothing mattered except him. His radiant smile, his contagious laughter, his excitability; it was all consuming. As the day wore on, your arms got tired, and you were ready for a break. You helped him collect the arrows in and around the tree, so he could show off for a bit like boys do for pretty girls. He did trick shots and action shots and even pinned the pinecone you threw for him to the tree. His skills were very impressive. Your return to the camp was met with impressed exclamations.

“Was that a bullseye on the first shot?!” Bofur asked, having seen the miracle even from the other side of the camp.

“Aye!” You said excitedly, proud of your accomplishment. You didn’t even realize that you were beginning to use their dialect.

“Good job lass!” Oin said, along with the others happily celebrating with you.

After all that training, you were hungry for a snack. You rummaged through your bag in search of the grapes you had foraged with Bilbo the day before. They weren’t in your bag where you left them, carefully wrapped in your old T-shirt.

‘They couldn’t have fallen out’ you thought as you scanned the camp for the thief, already having an idea of the culprit. You stopped when your eyes fell on Kili across the camp, leaning against a tree with a shit-eating grin as he popped a grape into his mouth.

You were livid. It was a total invasion of your only private property: your bag, and you felt extremely violated.

You couldn’t say anything to the offending dwarf or even look at him in fear of your rage exploding onto him. Your anger evident from your expression, the camp fell silent as you walked to Kili.

That feeling in Kili’s chest sunk to his boots when he saw how angry you were; he knew he’d gone too far. You snatched the grapes from his hand and walked (stomped) into the field beyond the camp.

“Y/N wait—” he tried to follow you into the field.

“NOT NOW KILI” you snapped at him over your shoulder in a tone he didn’t quite think you were capable of. He stopped in his tracks at your tone, the same one his mother used when she was very cross with him. The other members of the company who heard the commotion snickered at Kili’s self-inflicted misfortune.

You sat in the field, soaking up the sunshine and eating your grapes while you calmed down. Kili moped around camp like an abandoned puppy; it was quite a pitiful sight.

When you finished your snack, you took a few deep breaths to get the anger from your system and allow your thoughts to come together to properly explain to Kili why you were so mad. The youngest Durin hesitantly joined you in the field when he saw you were done with your grapes, his footfalls crunching the grass beneath him alerting you to his presence. He sat next to you clearly a little nervous by how he picked at the grass.

“I’m sorry,” he said, looking at the ground. “It was just supposed to be a joke, honest,”

“Joke or not, Kili Durin, you shouldn’t have gone through my stuff!” You wanted to make sure he understood how unhappy his actions made you. He cringed at his full name. “You violated the only sliver of privacy I have out here!”

“Sorry, Y/N,” he said in a regretful voice you’d never heard from him before. “I shouldn’t have gone through your bag.”

You sighed and looked over at him. “I forgive you Kee,” You took another deep breath, satisfied he’d learned his lesson, “Just don’t do it again, ok?”

He smiled, happy to be back on good terms with you, “I won’t, I promise”. You smiled too, his infectious charm melting what little remained of your anger. You gave him a hug, knowing you both needed physical reassurance.

He sat with you in the field for a while, content to stay in comfortable silence. You’d been eyeing a beautiful patch of flowers a few feet away since you’d sat down. You shifted so you were laying on your stomach to get a closer look at their vibrant hues and decided you wanted to use them, but how? Kili moved next to you, mirroring our position, to see what you were looking at. Then inspiration struck.

“I’ll braid them into your hair!” You said excitedly. He gave you a look of surprised confusion.

“What?! No!” he was immediately against the idea and even backed away from you as if you’d jump on him any second like his brother might. “Why don’t I put them in your hair instead? They’d look much better on you.” He desperately tried to come up with a reason to avoid the inevitable onslaught of mocking he’d have to endure if he agreed to your plan.

You brought yourself to a kneel so you could look him dead in the eyes with a blank expression, “Pussy,” you said.

He scoffed and got all huffy and puffy, “I am not a pussy!” He said defensively, his cute accent got thicker when he was flustered, it made it so hard to take him seriously, “I just think the flowers would make you even more beautiful than you already are.”

You blushed deeply at his words and looked away from his charming little smile to keep your thoughts from a more baser mindset and to think over his offer. He started twirling the end of one of the braids he’d done the night before between his fingers. It was a sweet and absentminded motion, to which you relented with a sigh, “Alright, but you have to teach me how to use a sword after.”

“Deal!” He gave a hearty nod. You got your hair stuff from your bag and your bracelet to work on and hopefully finish while Kili did your hair. You picked the prettiest flowers and put them in the extra fabric of your shirt like a delicate basket. He dragged over a stone to sit on and got to work undoing the braids and brushing your hair out.

You didn’t realize how tight he’d made the braids till the tension was released from your scalp. You sighed in pleasured relief as he moved your hair around with the brush. That sound immediately pricked his ears.

“Does that feel good, princess?” He looked down at you and smiled as he massaged the sore parts of your head. You were too lost in the feeling his skilled hands were creating to react to the pet name.

Once he massaged the soreness away, he parted your hair and began braiding. Kili had a vision of what he wanted to do to your hair. He wanted a thick band like a crown around the top of your head and four small thin braids scattered across the rest of your loose unbraided hair.

You were on an entirely different plane of existence. You felt so calm and relaxed and taken care of with his undivided attention, it was like nothing you’d ever felt before. His tranquil voice when he asked for a flower every now and then was the only thing you could hear. It felt like you were floating, your body sun warmed and peaceful.

When Kili was putting on the finishing touches, Fili came and joined you in the field to see what you both were doing, sadly pulling you from your lovely state of mind.

“Kili wouldn’t let me put flowers in his hair.” You pouted after the older brother inquired about your change in hairstyle.

“Even after he rummaged through your bag!” Fili feigned offense on your behalf with a smirk as he laid on his side in front of you both propped up on his elbow.

“Shut up, Fili” Kili huffed, ashamed of his previous actions, as he carded his fingers through your loose hair to make sure it was laying properly.

“Awe, Kiwi’s embawwassed,” you said in a baby-talk voice, making you and Fili laugh a little.

Kili stopped combing his fingers through your hair and tangled them in the loose hair at the back of your head. He pulled your head down to make you look up at him looming over you. He was about to say something, but the inadvertent dominating gesture caused an involuntary moan to slip past your lips, stalling any thoughts he tried to voice.

You were both stuck in that trance for just a moment, yet it took an eternity to pass. He was unable to look away from your pleasure pinched eyebrows and slightly parted panting lips. You were captivated by his handsome blushing features and the fire in his eyes. You wanted so desperately to kiss him, to meet his lips in heated passion.

“Good gods you two,” Fili rolled his eyes. His sudden interruption snapped Kili back to reality so he could release your hair. “Get a room,” Fili finished his statement.

“Shut up, Fili,” you both said in unison with faces equally ablaze and eyes cast anywhere but at each other. The elder just looked at you two and laughed to himself, he knew at that moment you were both madly in love.

“Here’s your brush, Y/N.” Kili handed it to you, wanting to change the subject.

“Yes, thank you” You took it from him and hastily returned your bag to camp. You met Kili back in the field for sword training. His brother was still there passively observing (waiting till he had to step in to correct the younger as this was not Kili’s area of expertise).

Bilbo allowed you to borrow his sword so you could get an idea of what a properly fitted one felt like without your wrists being torn to shreds by the other much heavier swords of the company. Kili walked you through basic moves and positions to teach you how to make your weapon like an extension of your own body. When he tried to speed up the movements and have you come at him in mock battle, you faltered and messed up the arrangement of poses.

When this happened, Fili of course would step in with a simplified version to help you. Before long, you had an audience, and the watchful eyes and extensive fighting prowess of Thorin and Dwalin. Kili was no longer the teacher but the sentient-sparing mannequin. The sequence of positions and movements became longer the more you worked at it. It felt amazing to be capable of so much. You knew it was just choreography, but it made you better now than you were before.

You were beginning to sweat under your thick tunic. The physical exertion was getting to Kili as well. When you took a water break you removed your shirt, the coffee brown padded camisole you wore underneath being far more breathable, but much tighter than your usual outerwear. It left hardly anything to the imagination.

Your less-dressed return to the now-stamped-down grass of the makeshift training area was met with impressed exclamations, wolf whistles, and light applause. You blushed and pretended to be a fashion model at the end of a runway. They found it very amusing.

Kili came back wondering what the commotion was about.

He saw you waiting for him. You hadn’t noticed him approaching yet, too busy putting on a silly little show. He loved seeing you like this, confident and carefree, not worrying about how you looked and focusing on something that was far more rewarding: having fun. He used the few seconds you were distracted to admire you. Your half up half down hair he’d just braided and styled, was blowing softly in the wind, and your short unruly baby hairs were matted to your sweaty forehead framing your face. Your camisole highlighted the alluring curve from your ribs to your hips. The hem of the fabric was ridding up on your waist, revealing just a sliver of your lower tummy. Your pants kept where they were, hugging tight to your thighs and bottom.

‘Two can play that game’ Kili thought, not even trying to hide his mischievous smile. He took his shirt off and threw it in his bag.

You looked up and saw him coming to meet you. The long bangs that framed his face were clinging to it now from his perspiration. He was smirking, knowing he caught you slightly off guard. His prominent pectoral muscles bled into his strong thick arms. His waist tapered at his hips where his pants were beginning to ride low, revealing his defined adonis belt in its retreat. He exuded power as he walked towards you with his arms out a bit from his side, and his palms facing you, as if he were challenging you.

“Ohho, it’s serious now, is it?” you said over a light chuckle, feigning being taken aback by his friendly challenge.

“Oh, it sure is.” He returned your light laugh and with a smug expression he tapped his sword against yours where it hung at your side. He knew he was flustering you. He could see it in the deepened flush that colored your cheeks and how your thumb picked at the leather-covered hilt of your sword.

You had to bite the inside of your lip rather hard to keep your eyes above his exposed shoulders. It had been so long since you’d felt so physically and mentally attracted to someone. The way he was looking at you made your panties dampen at the scandalous thoughts that his honeyed chocolate eyes made race through your head.

If Thorin hadn’t said, “Ready positions”, in that barking tone of his, you’d have jumped Kili’s bones and rode him off into the sunset.

You both got into the starting positions you preferred. Thorin shouted ‘Commence’ in Dwarfish. Kili came at you with harsh blows, which you perfectly countered like you’d been taught. You were able to quickly move yourself, so you were standing at his side. You took the opening and swung for his exposed ribs, but he easily blocked your attack. You pressed your blade against his to force him back and give up some ground. He stood steadfast in his heavy boots, however, and pushed back against you, getting his face close to yours to tease you.

“Good job, you remembered how to keep your grip on the sword.” He said with mock celebration. You gritted your teeth, determined to keep your footing. He glanced at your lips where your teeth were worrying your lower lip; A habit he noticed when you were focused or nervous.

“I’ve been taught well, Archer.” You shot back, as suave as you could manage under the conditions. He threw you back so he could reset his stance.

“We’ll see about that, Ibinê,” he said, flustering you again with that mischievous grin as his native language easily rolled off his tongue.

You charged at him, and your blades collided with a loud metallic clang. Your sudden advance surprised him, he backed up a few steps. Cheers came from your audience.

“Ibinê?” You strained while your blades met again in a brute force pressing match. “What does that mean?”

Kili shoved you back and swiftly turned around, a trick he hadn’t yet revealed in your spar. He abandoned his blade somewhere off to the side and spun around again but crouched in his movement so he could swipe your legs from beneath you. You fell to the ground with a muted thud, your weapon knocked from your grasp. Kili scrambled to straddle your hips, pinning down your legs with his and your wrists above your head. You tried to fight against him, but his strength and weight are much greater than yours.

He panted above you, smiling like a cat who got the canary, “If only it were you straddling me,” he whispered under his breath and winked at you discreetly. Your chest was heaving, making your breasts ebb and flow with the rhythm. The erotic tension was palpable between you.

“We have a victor!” someone said from the sidelines to break your daze. Kili blushed and stood and helped you from the ground. Your audience clapped a little then dispersed to the camp a few feet away.

You leisurely walked away from the encampment along the edge of the forest to catch your breath. The extra sway in your hips and a casual glance over your shoulder enticed Kili to follow you. He walked beside you. You looked up at him delighted he got the hint and followed you. He leaned over to say in a voice that was deeper than normal, “Ibinê means my gem.” His words took a moment to register, a delayed blush colored your chest and neck.

He bit his lip as a thought played behind his eyes. Growing bold from the adrenaline still in his veins, he wrapped his hand around yours. He picked up speed till he was running with you trailing behind. He took you far from the others. The sun was setting, painting the sky in those vivid colors that only dusk and dawn brought.

Kili slowed to a stop and used his grip on your hand to bring you in front of him. He took a step into your personal space.

“Labathmizi means I adore you.” He gingerly placed his hand on your cheek like he was handling the thinnest, most precious glass in the world. You were blushing profusely, your gaze danced from his eyes to his lips. “Abnâmulzi means you are beautiful.” He pecked his lips against yours for a moment then backed you against a tree and pinned you against it with his strong hand on your hip. The prolonged eye contact was making you pant. His voice was low and rough with arousal, “Azralizi du-nâmrul, Ibinê…” His head ducked down so his lips brushed against yours. “…means I want to fuck you, my gem.” He pressed his lips to yours in a kiss that surpassed any expectation you had. You lifted your leg over his hip, his hand went from your hip to your thigh, an encouraging movement, and it felt like it was searing into your cloth covered skin. It slid up to your ass cheek and urged you to grind against him. Your hand was on his bare shoulder and the other tangled in his hair, scratching and pulling lightly on the soft brown tresses at the nap of his neck. You whimpered as his hardening member pressed against your soaking core. Kili met your movements, making himself hiss at the delicious friction you were both craving.

When you broke the kiss for air as lust flooded your mind and loins, “That’s really hot” was all you could manage.

You were becoming addicted to his kiss. The way his thumb would glide against your cheek and the soft, barely there little whimpers he was making as you deepened the kiss were driving you mad with need. His tongue won its fight against yours when he gyrated his hips perfectly to grind into you, causing a moan to bubble from you. When he broke away, he looked at you, panting.

He suddenly went silent and perfectly still. His eyebrows pinched in a sudden focused confusion as he looked past the tree you were pinned to. This immediately concerned you.

You opened your mouth to ask if he was ok, but he put his finger to his lips to silence you. He closed his eyes and turned his head to focus on something; dwarfs and their connection to the environment around them still confused you.

His eyes shot open in a panic, and he tore himself away from you so he could pick you up bridal style.

You clung to him as he broke out in a sprint back to camp, “A pack of orc’s are coming.”  

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Taglist <3: @letmelickyoureyeballs, @nessarosefiction, @akari-rioan

[dizzzydancin]

Lights, Camera, Mouthwash!- Chapter 2

THIS JUST IN: NEW CHAPTER JUST DROPPED! Make sure you read the prologue before this chapter, though I feel like that's self explanatory lol

College has just entered the spring semester—you know what that means! Final projects are being assigned, and luckily for Jimmy, he has a brilliant idea. Introducing: Mouthwashing- a psychological horror film written by Jimmy himself.

Enjoy!

[werewolves-and-winchesters]

Summary:

Gojo Satoru decides to spend the summer working as a lifeguard with his best friend Ieiri Shoko at a popular beach in Okinawa. He falls in love with a beautiful surfer. Based on artwork by Blargberries Lifeguard!Gojo and Surfer!Geto

[hellcheerficdatabase]

bound to deliver

Author: @ebongawk

Rating/Warning: Explicit

Chapter Count: 1/1

Description:

“I, um. I think about that sometimes. About you doing that.”

Eddie grinned, his eyebrows hidden behind his bangs. “I mean, I love doing things to you, but you’ll have to be a tiny bit more specific.”

or

Chrissy and Eddie try something new.

Tags: Alternate universe- everyone lives and nobody dies, established relationship, smut, fluff, plot what plot, we only know smut, alternating POV, one-shot, status: completed

[darkimpala1897]

"Morning."

Gareth, Eddie, Jeff all wake up together very confused luckily everyone was clothed. They all looked at each other confused.

"Honeymoon breakfast for the newly weds."

Gareth getting up shaking his head because he's pretty sure nobody got married.

Gareth: "Um, sorry dude. You've got the wrong room. No one here got married."

"Really? That one should check his finger."

He points to Eddie was trying to remember the night before. He realizes he's wearing a wedding ring.

Eddie: "Why am I wearing a ring? Did I marry Chrissy, Robin or Nancy? I married Chrissy didn't I? God I have a problem saying no to beautiful women!"

Steve coming out of the bathroom because he woke up in the bathtub for some reason.

Steve: "Hey. Does anyone know why I'm wearing a wedding ring?"

Eddie absolutely going wided eye to the point his eyes looked about ready to pop out of his head.

"You married that guy."

Steve and Eddie looking towards each other in shock.

Steve: "I married Dustin best friend."

Eddie: "I married the babysitter."

Jeff trying to make the situation better.

Jeff: "Okay, okay. This still doesn't explain Jason and the dolphin in the hot tub."

"The babysitter really? That's oddly a new one, and this is Vegas. I'm gonna go enjoy your breakfast."

Everyone just stares at each other so confused, because where was everyone else and how the hell did Steve and Eddie get married?

[askthekraliekrew]

alex and his bbgs tazerig tim (the tool man taylor) wright

___ Tim : Uh. I’m gonna... go. And forget I ever heard that.

Alex : ...

Alex : Well, on the bright side, that’s the first time he’s talked to me without trying to knock my teeth out since we started living here.

Alex : ...I think he’d kick me out if Jay wasn’t here.

[eyitzme]

ᵗʰᵉ ʳᵒᵃᵈ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ⁿⁱᵍʰᵗ ; ˣᵃⁿʳᵉⁱ ⁽ᵈʳᵈᵗ⁾

Summary: Xander Matthews and Arei Nageishi are trying to get home after spending the day with their classmates. Traffic, rain, and construction go against their wishes, and they're not making it home until a few more hours. Xander can deal with it, but when Arei's phone dies and she can't listen to music anymore, a conversation starts between them. It's not that bad. Word Count: 3,401 A/N: If I had a nickel for every Xanrei fic I made that happened during the night, I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but isn't it weird how it happened twice? So, this fic was supposed to be Xanrei driving to some place, sitting on top of the car, looking at the night sky, and talking. (I have three nickels if you include ideas.) The moment I started writing this, my brain wondered about traffic, and the whole direction of the fic shifted before I even knew it. Writing is so weird. Faint traces remain, but you couldn't even tell what the original plan was unless I told you. I'm still proud of writing this entire one shot in one day, though, since the Xanrei fic I posted the other day did, in fact, give me motivation to write more Xanrei. Applaud me! (I'm imagining you, the reader, as a genderless being vaguely shaped like a human applauding for me right now.)

it isn't so bad being out here with you.

Xander Matthews enjoyed car rides. They were, most of the time, a nice experience that helped you get along with those around you. There were plenty of things you could do in the car, and the small stops through the trip, if it was a long one, gave you a short break from the others if you needed it. The question of where you were going was great as well! The possibilities were endless!

Today wasn't "most of the time."

Xander and his classmate, Arei Nageishi, were trying to go home after a long day of taking a break from school at a park five hours away from campus with the rest of their classmates. According to some of them—half, actually—Arei wasn't allowed to drive or even be in a car alone. Xander wasn't sure what the big deal was, but it wasn't like he spoke to Arei much. Whatever the case was, he found himself in his car willing to drive her home. It didn't seem like that bad of an idea, especially since Arei was busy with whatever music was playing in her headphones. The silence was a bit unnerving for Xander, especially considering who he was in the car with, but he was fine with it.

But then they got onto the highway and were stuck in traffic thanks to some construction. It was already getting late, and it just had to start raining too. They were barely moving a centimetre about every few minutes, and with how it was already nearing 11 P.M., he wasn't sure they were making it back home before midnight.

Xander's car was one of the more silent ones. He wasn't honking his horn obnoxiously like the other cars, and there wasn't any conversation going on either. The conversation part changed the moment Arei declared from the backseat, "This is the worst day ever!"

"It isn't that bad," Xander told her.

"Yes, it is. My phone died, and we're not even home yet, right?"

"You didn't realize we're stuck in traffic?"

"We're stuck in traffic?" From the rearview mirror, he could see Arei putting her headphones on her shoulders and looking out the windows. Her backpack rested on the ground in front of her. "Oh, we are. That sucks."

With his eyes still on the rearview mirror, Xander asked, "You actually didn't notice?"

"No," she answered. "I was going to listen to music until we got home so I wouldn't have to talk to you, but now my phone's dead."

"What's so bad about talking to me?"

"You're British."

Xander sighed. "You're not funny..."

"You're not funny," Arei repeated in a horrible attempt at a British accent.

Xander wasn't sure why he even attempted to talk to her. Arei pushed everyone's buttons almost too easily, and he was no exception. He wasn't sure what her deal was, but she could so annoying at times!

"How long until we're back home?" Arei asked.

"We're probably not getting back until after midnight," Xander answered.

"What time is it now?"

"11:48 P.M."

"I bet all the others are already home by now. I should've went with one of them instead of you."

"Too late now." In his mind, Xander repeated, Don't get annoyed. She's trying to make you annoyed, so giving her a reaction would be giving her what she wants. Don't get annoyed.

"It's Friday, right?" Arei leaned back against the backseat. "Nothing to do tomorrow. I'd be upset about the traffic if I had something important."

"You're not the one driving," Xander said.

"Hu Jing doesn't let me drive," she scoffed. "She says I'm not allowed to after what happened last time."

"What happened last time?"

"I don't feel like hearing a speech about being a good citizen or whatever you talk about, so I'll keep that a secret."

"I wasn't going to give you any speeches..."

"Better safe than sorry. By the way, you should really stop giving people speeches. David is right there. He gives better speeches than you. Stop."

The mention of his idol and classmate, David Chiem, put a smile on Xander's face. "Of course David can give better speeches than I can! He's amazing! You should've heard his speech the other day at—"

"Fanboy." Arei rolled her blue eyes. "Just get used to him already."

"I am used to him—"

"Doesn't look like it." She lowered her voice and put on her fake and terrible British accent. "Oh, David, be my partner for this project, love! David, look at these fish and chips I made for you! It'd be great if David could see me right now, innit? I need to give this bottle of water to David right now! David, David, David, David!"

All the reminders Xander had been giving himself to not get annoyed were immediately forgotten. "First, I don't sound like that! Second, your excuse of a British accent is just you not pronouncing the T's. Third, you know I've never said anything you think I say. I swear, you're the most annoying and selfish prick I've ever—"

A sniff interrupted his dialogue. Small teardrops started to flow from her eyes as Arei rubbed them away. "Y-You're so mean..."

Xander's heart shuddered. Her tears were fake. She always did that to get what she wanted. He knew that, but he still wanted her to stop. It was how he felt with everyone, but it was different with Arei. Instead of just the general "stop-crying", he had a more specific want. He wanted to comfort her, take back what he said in a hopefully more meaningful way—that probably wouldn't be the case, though—and possibly putting in some physical contact. He couldn't place why it was so different with her.

As usual, he had to ignore that want, mainly because his brain always went into panic-mode the second someone had tears start to show. "Arei, I didn't mean that..."

"Yes, you did. I get it. I'm the most annoying, selfish, pathetic, and ugly prick you've ever met. You never wanted to deal with me, but everyone else forced you to...!" She rubbed her nose against her sleeve, her blue nail polish looking darker than normal.

The car in front of them moved forward a couple of centimetres. Xander moved his car as far as he could, but the car behind them honked anyway. That made the other cars around them to start honking. Xander really couldn't deal with this plus Arei crying in the middle of the night.

He turned around in his seat to look at her from the front. He had to use the only card he had. "Arei, I promise I don't think of you like that. I won't ever call you that ever again. I won't even think about you like that."

She sniffed. Their eyes met in the rearview mirror. Something about the rain, the streetlights, and the surrounding headlights made her blue eyes with fake tears look bigger than normal. "Promise...?"

"I promise." His voice came out quieter than he expected it to. He figured it had to do with how quiet and soft her voice was. That, at the end of the day, was just another part of her tricks.

He turned back to the road as Arei immediately stopped crying and said, "Good. I'll remember this, Xander. If you break it—"

She was interrupted by a car near them honking their horn loud and long enough to probably be heard throughout the country.

She sighed. "Stupid drivers... We get it, it's late, you want to go home, now stop honking your horns and annoying everyone else! It's not doing anything to speed this up!"

Taking a peek at the rearview mirror, he noticed she was scowling. Normally, he didn't think people scowling was good as it showed they were annoyed at something that maybe they shouldn't be annoyed. True to it, he didn't like seeing her scowl, but a small part of him thought the flash of emotion in her eyes and the way her nose scrunched up was adorable.

He was probably tired. That was probably what it was.

Putting his eyes on anything else as the cars inches forward again, Xander asked, "Arei, do you get road rage?"

"Only when I'm the one driving," Arei answered. "Why?"

"You seem like someone who would."

"I'm taking that as an insult."

"It wasn't meant to be an insult."

"It sounded like one."

"Did your road rage make Hu Jing and everyone else decide you can't drive?" Xander asked to make her think about something else.

"I'm not telling you. What happened last time is a secret, Alexander." Arei pronounced his full name slowly like she was trying to make every letter of stick into his brain. He never told her what his full name was, and he always wondered if Teruko Tawaki had something to do with it. She was the only one in their class who knew his full name.

Xander turned his head to the window. Rain splattered onto it as he looked through the darkened windows to the car next to it. A man was asleep in the passenger seat as a woman drove the car. He wondered where they were going, where they came from, and why they were out so late. They, or at least the woman, could be wondering the same thing about him.

"What music do you listen to?" Xander almost jumped at the sound of Arei's voice. She had released herself out of her seatbelt's hold without turning on the sound of the alarm and was leaning over from the back. Her head was near his, her hair falling over the side her face as she searched through his glove box.

"Stop looking through my stuff!" Xander swatted her hand away. He was a second too late from her opening one and finding a charger.

She grabbed it before he could stop her and inspected it. "This one won't charge my phone. Useless." She dropped it in the passenger seat.

"You could at least put it back..." His grumbles went ignored, so he had to put it back.

"Where's your phone?" Arei asked. "Do you have, like, any streaming services? I wanna listen to something. Play some British song."

"I left my phone at home—"

"Who leaves their phone at home? What is this, the 2000's?"

"We're not listening to music," Xander said. "Sit down before someone sees you."

"We're going at one metre per hour. No one cares." As if she was trying to prove her point, she straightened her back while still sitting in between the passenger and driver seat. He had to tilt his head up to talk to her.

"What if we get into a car crash?"

"How bad are you at driving that we get in a car crash when we're barely moving? At that point, I'd take my chances with Ace driving while Levi does his scary stuff sitting in the passenger seat, Arturo sitting next to J in the backseat taking about J's mom, and Teruko's in the trunk here for her bad luck."

"Why is Teruko in the boot?"

"'Boot?'"

"Trunk," he quickly corrected. "Why is she in the trunk?"

"British people." Her nose scrunched to show disgust, but he knew she didn't actually feel that way. Maybe that knowledge was the reason why that simple act tugged on his heart. "There's no more room in the backseat, and Teruko has to be somewhere if I'd rather risk being in a car with her than you. Oh, yeah, if Arturo and J sit in the backseat with me, I don't have enough room to stretch my legs..."

"I was wondering why you sat in the backseat instead of the front."

He expected Arei to say something about her choices in car seating arrangements, but instead, she asked, "You have a tongue piercing?"

Xander was confused for a second before realizing she didn't know he had one. "Oh, yeah, I do. My old school had a strict rule that didn't allow any piercings, so I pierced my tongue. If a teacher walked by, all I have to do is close my mouth."

He stuck out his tongue so she could see his lip piercing better. The actual lip piercing wasn't anything special, but it was the act of getting one that was. To him, it was an act to fight against the rules that didn't make sense. That was his job! He pulled his tongue back into his mouth so he could explain what he was thinking back then when he noticed Arei expression.

It was oddly unreadable. She always kept the emotions she wanted others to see on the surface, so having a blank face was weird. Her eyes were trained onto his lips, and for a few seconds, silence took over. Then, her eyes lifted off his lips to his eye. He wasn't sure if it was just him or if she truly did stiffen ever so slightly, but he wasn't going to ask. The atmosphere between them felt...different. Like a blink alone could ruin whatever was going on between them. Not like he knew what was going on between them.

Xander wasn't sure how long they stayed like that. It felt like hours. It was probably no more than a few minutes, though, especially when the car behind them honked their horn. He turned to the road and realized he could move forward.

Arei slipped into the passenger seat when the car honked. After he moved the car as far as he could, he forced himself to expand the suddenly uncomfortable silence for a second to try to get used to it. He couldn't, so he asked, "I thought you didn't like sitting there."

She shrugged. "I like it. It's just that I like stretching my legs out more. There's not enough room here, and I can't even lay down."

"If you're sitting here now, put your seatbelt on."

Surprisingly, she listened. His surprise could only be held for a few seconds before she started rummaging around in his glove box again.

"I told you to stop looking through my stuff!" He swatted at her hands again.

"Why? Do you have something to hide, Xander Matthews? Do you have drugs in here? Porn magazines? Condoms? Were you planning—"

"I don't have any of those, and I wasn't planning anything!" Even though the streetlights and the headlights made it relatively easy to see, he hoped it was too hard for her to see how red his cheeks were.

"That's what they all say." She took a five-second break before going back to it.

To focus on something that wouldn't give him a headache, Xander looked out the window to see if he could see the man and the woman who were in the car next to them, but they were gone. A new car was there was two new people. They were a different man and woman. From what it looked like, they were having a lively conversation with each other, one filled with laughter and smiles. He couldn't make out what they were talking about, but they looked like they were enjoying each other's presence.

"Xander, say, 'Cheese!'"

"Huh?"

When Xander turned his head towards Arei, he found her holding his phone towards his face, unlocking it with facial I.D. Before he could stop her, she went back to the backseat and went through his phone, keeping it out of his reach. She readjusted her seatbelt to be around her again as she said, "Liar, liar, liar," each "liar" getting a shake of her head. "You said you kept your phone at home, but it's right here? I knew no one kept their phone at home nowadays! What kind of things are you hiding in here?"

"Nothing, now give me my phone back!" He tried to reach for it from the driver seat, but his seatbelt stopped him from getting too far.

"I'm only checking what music you listen to." She showed him the phone screen briefly as proof. When she turned it back to herself, she stayed silent as she scrolled through. He wasn't sure why he felt nervous about her knowing what he listened to, but he did. After a minute, she smiled and said, "You would listen to this."

The smile on her face and her voice were different than everything he got used to with her. It was small and gentle, and her voice was soft with no hint of teasing. They worked together to give her a look of sweet understanding. It was unusual, considering who it was coming from, but she looked so pretty that he couldn't look away.

He wished he had the photographic memory of their classmate, Rose Lacroix. Just remembering that look on her face would be enough, but if he also received her artistic skills, then it would be even better. Being able to paint how to the light from their surroundings hit her, how the screen reflected on her eyes, how her being in his car like it was the most natural thing in the world would be a dream. He could even frame it somewhere and show off the moment he realized—

No, he didn't realize anything.

Arei leaned down and opened her backpack. She shuffled through it until she pulled out earbuds. Despite already having headphones still resting on her shoulders, she plugged the earbuds into his phone and said, "I'm listening to your playlist now. How much time do we have left until we get home?"

Xander forced his eyes back to the road. The car in front of him moved farther than before, and even with the rain, he could see that there was less traffic not that far up ahead. "Once we make it past here, we should be home in around two and a half hours."

"That's enough time to listen to your playlist. I'm telling you my opinions on it tomorrow—and you better care about them." She put her earbuds in, leaned back against the car seat, and closed her eyes. Even though he couldn't tell what she was thinking, she looked more peaceful than normal.

The construction site was coming to an end. In less than half an hour, he should be able to drive more freely. The rain would be a little bit of a bother, but it was nothing he couldn't handle. He already had Arei inside his car. But then again, his mind went back to the sweet smile on her face every time he thought of her. He would happily deal with her if it meant he got to see that smile more.

As time went on, their car made it further through traffic. They just about reached the end when Xander felt someone nudge his shoulder. He looked over and saw Arei sitting in between in the driver seat and the passenger seat and holding out one of her earbuds.

He hesitated, but he took it. Once he did, she sat on the passenger seat and put the seatbelt on wordlessly. He still hadn't put the earbud in his ear yet.

"You need to stop moving so much," he said.

"I'll stop now," she replied. "We're actually moving, so you can get into a car crash now."

"I don't want to get into one."

"Good, I don't either. If you do and I die but you live, I'm haunting you." Her eyes flashed as she looked at him. "And if you try to haunt me if I'm alive but your dead, I'm exorcising you in the most painful way possible."

"I don't want to kill us both, so I guess we both have to live."

"Good thing we agree on that."

Xander realized he still hadn't put the earbud in. When he did, he realized his playlist was playing. His phone sat between them as music went through to both of them. Arei was looking out the window with that unreadable expression she had when she found out he had a lip piercing.

Xander wasn't sure what to think of it, but he had to drive right now. He wasn't risking any haunting from Arei. She could push anyone's buttons, but she would make for a cute ghost.

[green-fifteen]

Author: LinguisticJubilee

Fandom: The Hobbit

Relationship: Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield

Summary:

Balin blinks, shifting backwards. “Laddie, it’s—it’s been a year. Bilbo has returned home, to the Shire.” He looks at Thorin, then says more gently, “I did not realize you counted the hobbit among your treasures.”

Tags:

Angsty Schmoop, Tropes, Cheesy, The amount of cheesy in this is not to be believed, Fix-It, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies

Podfic length: 0:1:02:29

Streaming, MP3, and MB4 available.

[asoiafzambi]

Chapters: 9/12 Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, House of the Dragon (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Daemon Targaryen/Rhaenyra Targaryen, Aegon II Targaryen/Rhaenyra Targaryen, Aemond "One-Eye" Targaryen/Helaena Targaryen, Aemond "One-Eye" Targaryen/Lucerys Velaryon (Son of Rhaenyra), Baela Targaryen/Alyn Velaryon, Sara Snow/Jacaerys Velaryon, Criston Cole/Alicent Hightower, Garmund Hightower/Rhaena Targaryen (Daughter of Daemon), Daemon Targaryen/Leanor Velaryon|Addam of Hull Characters: Daemon Targaryen, Laenor Velaryon|Addam of Hull, Alyn Velaryon, Rhaenys Targaryen Velaryon, Rhaenyra Targaryen, Aegon II Targaryen, Lucerys Velaryon (Son of Rhaenyra), Aemond "One-Eye" Targaryen, Helaena Targaryen, Alicent Hightower, Criston Cole, Otto Hightower, Garmund Hightower, Rhaena Targaryen (Daughter of Daemon), Baela Targaryen, Daeron Targaryen (Son of Viserys I), Aegon Targaryen (The Younger), Viserys II Targaryen, Cassandra Baratheon Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Study, Everyone Is Alive, Angst, Seperation, Reconciliation, Aging, Polyamory, Crack Treated Seriously, Work In Progress, POV Alternating, Targcest | Targaryen Incest (A Song of Ice and Fire)

Summary: A different time. A different king.

A/N: Chapters 6 to 9 are up now. Sorry it took so long.

[the-greatlibrary]

Finding Your Place by lvmehtme - E, One-shot

Bilbo is meant to return to the Shire at the start of spring, but he's conflicted when things develop between him and Thorin. Tauriel is a good friend and helps him think through the pros and cons of staying in Erebor, until, finally he comes to his decision. Also, Dwarves are odd when it comes to age differences between the races and Bilbo has had it up to here with their coddling!

[the-really-lonely-mountain]

Along for The Ride - Part 1

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Summary: Transported to Middle Earth, you must Join Thorin Oakenshield's Company as they travel to reclaim Erebor! OR: My take on the classic 'modern girl in Middle Earth' troupe. With this first installment, we are following the first movie of The Hobbit trilogy, and falling in love with Kili on the way! Slow burn with this one y'all, nothing spicy till the next work I'm afraid.

Tags: Kili / Reader, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Modern Character in Middle Earth, During The Hobbit, How Do I Tag, Canon-Typical Violence, Kíli Is a Little Shit (Tolkien), wrote this while I had covid, in like 4 days lol, implied soulmates, Dwarf Culture & Customs, Freeform, Holding Hands, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sleepy Cuddles, Protective Thorin Oakenshield Company Members, Dwalin & Thorin Oakenshield Friendship, Fluff and Humor, Domestic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Where In Middle-Earth Is Gandalf?, Hair Braiding, Dwarf Courting, My First Tumblr Fic, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fíli & Kíli & Thorin Live, Thorin Oakenshield Lives, Fíli Lives (Tolkien), Kíli Lives (Tolkien)

Word Count: 6,292

A/N: I was utterly appalled by the lack of Kili writers on here and Ao3. Y'all who write for Kili, I've been eating your crumbs like it's the shit (cause it is) for weeks, but one can't be sustained on crumbs alone so I've prepared a feast!! This is the first fic I've ever wanted to post, please be gentle. Comments, Likes, and Reblogs are loved and treasured!!

Tagging the amazing Kili writers I've been living off of for the past few weeks and who have inspired me so they might share in the feast as well lol go check out their stuff too: @mikathemonster, @cowboybeepboop, @littleenglishfangirl, @ethereal-inquisitor, @sweetpeakili

Photo credit: @immawriteyouthings

Divider credit: @cafekitsune

You were having one of those days that made you want to run away from everything. Instead, you walked on the golf course behind your house after hours; no phone, no umbrella, no bag this time, just you. You had what you could fit from your hands in your jean pockets as you walked the grassy field. Something twinkled and caught your eye on the far side of the fairway, there was a sparkle in the ferns. You walked over and began looking through the underbrush. Your hand grazed a smooth stick with a mangled end that encased a gem. You picked it up hoping for a better look but were transported to another world instead!

You appeared in the new world holding the staff. You were standing beside an older fellow with a pointy hat and long grey beard. You looked around and saw many other gruff, burly-looking men sitting in an encampment. They looked as confused as you. You did the only thing you could think of doing at that moment.

You turned around and took off running as fast as you could.

The wizard whose staff you were running away with asked the younger dwarves in his company to fetch you for him. They ran after you as quick as the wind. You dodged trees and hurdled bushes, making an all-around great effort. You were slowing down though. You stopped for a moment to catch your breath and plan. A twig snapped in the distance; quick footsteps closed in on you. You took off again. You needed a place to hide, a moment to think for God's sake. You were afforded no such luxuries. They were gaining, you were tiring. In your drained haste, you tripped on a bush which sent you stumbling and struggling to regain your footing given your momentum. You finally fell and scampered to take cover behind the roots of a great tree. Their footfalls grew slower and drew nearer. They were so close you could hear their words now.

“…She’s hiding, Fili,” one said much closer than you expected them to be.

You tried your best to steady your breathing. Your heartbeat was so loud you knew they could hear it.

“Stop scaring her Kili,” The other chastised. “You know she’s got to be scared half to death”. He walked past you, studying the ground. The other came up the other side of the tree doing the same.

You gripped the staff preparing yourself to be found. They turned in unison following the same tracks and looked up at you simultaneously. They were both panting but not as hard as you. Fili, the elder and more experienced of the two knelt where he stood a few yards from your curled trembling form.

“My name is Fili” He put his hand on his chest and motioned to the man next to him, “This is my brother Kili. We mean no harm to you.” He kept his distance and showed his empty hands. You stayed firmly pressed against the tree trunk, your chest heaving rapidly and your eyes as large as saucers. They could have tackled you, beaten you, or done any number of terrible violating things, but they kept their distance and spoke softly.

“What’s your name?” Kili asked, with a charming smile as he crouched beside his brother.

“Y/N,” you said in a shaky freaked-out tone.

“Y/N, that’s our friend wizard’s staff,” Fili said, “If anyone can figure out how you got here, he can.”

“But you gotta come back to camp with us,” Kili said reaching out his hand as a peace offering. So many horrible things could happen to you in the wild of this new world, but even more on top of that could if you didn’t go with them.

“How can I trust you?” You asked them. They looked at each other.

“How can we trust you?” Kili threw back at you with a suspicious look and recoiled his hand.

“Touche” you nodded returning his look.

“Seems we are at an impasse then,” Fili huffed at his brother, “You want to get home, and our wizard can do that. The only way that can happen is if you come with us back to our camp. We can only offer you our word and promise on our honor as dwarven princes that you will not be harmed by any in our company.”

You thought for a moment and nibbled at your lip, “You promise?” you looked up at Kili this time.

Kili looked you deep in the eyes, and very seriously said: “No harm will ever come to you, on my honor as a prince.”

You nodded at this, “Very well”, and tried to stand up but were stuck against the tree. The 2 men easily lifted you back to your feet. You followed them back to the camp.

You tried your best to hide behind Kili as you approached the wizard smoking a pipe. You peeked from around his shoulder at the other men in the camp. They were looking at you.

“Please sit, my dear,” The wizard said to you, motioning to the rest of the long log beside him “We have much to discuss.”

Your legs wouldn’t move you from behind the dwarf. You were still quite afraid.

“She seems to have taken a liking to you Kili,” the wizard said to him. The rest of the company let out a soft chuckle of agreement. You couldn’t see it from your angle, but Kili smiled and nodded.

“Sit down child, we aren’t going to hurt you,” One of the dwarves sitting across the fire said. You took a deep breath to gather your courage. One false move by any of the others would have you bolting again.

You moved from behind Kili and sat beside the wizard still clutching the staff.

“May I take that from you?” the wizard politely asked. You handed it to him. He explained how this type of thing had happened to a couple of his wizard friends before, but he didn’t know the remedy or spell to undo it or how to prevent it from happening again. You sat quietly listening and nodding. He explained to you and the rest of the company that he was leaving to travel to his friend and inquire about your predicament. In the meantime, he convinced the company and its leader, Thorin you came to know, to keep you in the company as an innocent bystander to help around the camp and whatnot till Gandalf (the wizard) could figure out what to do with you. Gandalf gave you a small sack of coins, instructing you to get a bag, a bedroll, clothes, and any other necessities you’ll need at the next town.

As the fire died down so did the company. They got out their bedrolls and sleeping gear like a synchronized unit and as quickly as they started, they were all asleep snoring softly. Kili had first watch and was sitting on the ground next to you leaning against the log you were on. You slid onto the ground next to him curled with your knees to your chest. He looked over at you. You looked over at him.

“I don’t know what to do now,” you said not hiding the waver in your voice very well, “I’m so scared.” You couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. You cried into your hands as quietly as possible, so you didn’t disturb and anger the others. If you had looked at Kili, you would have seen him in a slight panic and at a loss for what to do, he didn’t know how to console crying women. You sobbed into your hands knowing you just needed to let it all out then you’d be fine. Kili looked at the fire and put his hand on your back. Physical contact of any kind back home was next to nonexistent, it felt nice to know he was trying his best to comfort you. After a few minutes of uncontrollable sobbing and hiccups wracking through you, you began calming down. When you were able to breathe properly, you wiped your face even though tears kept falling. You sniffled and rested your chin on your knees letting the tears fall silently now.

“Do you feel better?” Kili guessed in a soft tone and rubbed his hand on your back.

You nodded at him, “Yes” You took a deep breath and wiped the tears from your eyes as best you could, “Thank you” You looked at him and smiled a little. He smiled and nodded too, still concerned but returned his hand to his lap. You sniffled and looked at the fire.

“Really though I don’t know what I’m doing,” you said. “I’ve never been camping before,” you paused to think. “I don’t know how to fight or use a sword or make a fire or hunt or-or—” You were working yourself up and starting to cry again. Kili cut you off before you could start sobbing hysterically again.

“WOAH! Woah!!” alarmed, he put his hand on your back again, “It’s ok. Calm down.” he said harshly, “Take a deep breath, that seemed to help last time,” He mumbled the last part under his breath. That made you smile despite yourself.

“You don’t know how to console someone, do you?” You took a deep breath and wiped your eyes. He shook his head and took his hand from you. “Seems we’re both out of our depth then,” you said making the mood a bit lighter.

“In my defense, I was raised in a pack of manly men,” He smiled fondly “It’s a wonder my mother got through to me at all.”

“So, you do have a mother,” you said, making him look at you quizzically “I assumed you were raised by wolves,” You shrugged. He laughed and you couldn’t help but smile.

“You’re not completely wrong about that,” He smiled, looking over at the men across the fire. There was a momentary silence. “We’ll teach you those things, how to fight, how to make a fire, all that,” He looked over at you, “I mean who knows how long Gandalf will be, and you’d have to be pretty stupid not to pick up a thing or two even from this bunch.” You smiled and nodded; this calmed your nerves a little. A moment of silence fell between you again.

“Is it ok if I stay up with you?” you innocently asked, “I’m not very tired.”

“Sure,” he said casually, “May I ask about your life back in your world?”

“OK,” You nodded.

“What do you do?” he asked, you gave him a weird look. “Like for a living, how do you make money, how do you spend your days?”

“I’m a student at university at the moment.” He looked at you confused this time. “I spend my days studying at a desk, it’s boring and dull” You quickly summed up.

“Ooohh,” He said, “No wonder you couldn’t run for shit,” He laughed.

You scoffed, “So rude,” You huffed, failing to hide your smile. He was glad you were cheering up a bit.

“If it’s so boring and dull, why don’t you do something else?” He asked, naive to your world and its ways.

“It’s…complicated” you sighed “I have to study to do what I want to do for work even though I don’t want to work or study or do any of that, but I have to make money somehow because I need money to do stuff and buy things because the world I live in is shitty that way and it’s so frustrating sometimes,” you gritted your teeth to make your point.

“Well, what do you want to do then?” he asked, trying to understand your strange world.

“Sit on the beach,” You said without hesitation “…Listen to the waves…sleep on a blanket in the sun,” you sighed wistfully. “Die happy and rich.”

“That does sound nice” He agreed “I’ve never seen a tropical ocean before, the seas near the Blue Mountains are all frozen over.”

“Surely there’s a beach somewhere in this world,” You refused to believe the universe sent you to a world without a beach.

“There is! I’ve heard stories of Southern Gondor, where the sun makes the sand hotter than forges, and the water falls over the horizon in every direction.”

“That sounds like the beaches from back home,” You felt a little bad for him. You’d been practically raised at the beach because it was the only free thing to do in your hometown.

“May I ask a question?” you asked this time.

“Of course,” He shifted to lean against the log and face you.

“What are you guys doing?” you gestured to the camp around you.

“We are on a quest!” He said proudly, “A quest to take back our ancestral home from the dread dragon Smaug,” he said in a sinister voice. He explained about Erebor and the dragon and Thorin to catch you up. You listened, nodded, and took it all in, asking questions and giggling at his jokes. He was a decent storyteller.

“And I’m just along for the ride I guess,” you said deflated about your role in all this.

“If it’s any consolation, you’re quite good company,” He indulged; Kili always got so lonely on watch.

“Yay!” you said over a yawn, “I’d hate to bore any of you,” you replied, genuinely fearing your stories may never measure up to theirs. You leaned over and laid on the soft grass, curled in a ball with your arm as a pillow. You tried not to shiver from the cool evening breeze. You heard some shuffling of fabric, and then a blanket fluttered on top of you. You looked at Kili who smiled and said: “I’m quite the furnace at night, I’ll be fine without it,” he reassured.

“Thank you,” you said over another yawn. You didn’t expect to fall asleep but the next thing you knew it was early morning and you were awoken by the clanging of pots and spoons. You sat up and looked around to get your bearings.

‘Still in the same strange world’ you thought not fully awake. Kili appeared, greeted you good morning, and handed you a bowl of white goo he called porridge. You thanked him and ate your breakfast in silence like the rest of the company. While the men packed up the camp you were tasked with washing the dishes in a nearby stream. You were struck by the beauty of the incredible woods around you even in the dim morning light. You returned to camp and put the dishes in their bag, which was taken by one of your new companions. You felt out of place without a task among everyone who knew what to do. Balin saw you standing in the middle of the camp looking lost. He asked Thorin what they were to do about their lack of an extra pony for you. They decided you could ride with Kili seeing as he was the lightest (next to Bilbo) and his pony could take the weight and because you seemed the most comfortable with him. The old dwarf with a white-grey beard curled up at the ends approached you with as much of a nonthreatening air as he could muster.

“Good morning, my dear!” He greeted you with a chipper smile. “My name is Balin”

“Good morning,” you replied. “I don't quite know what I’m to be doing,” you said sheepishly.

“That’s ok lass, it’ll come with time,” he reassured, “For now, you’ll ride with Kili so you can see if he needs help getting ready.”

“Ok,” You nodded and started walking in Kili’s direction. You stopped in front of his pony and petted its nose and down its neck. “I’ve been told that I’m to ride with you,” you said timidly looking at him adjust his saddle. Kili looked at you and nodded.

“I’ll be happy to have a lovely conversation again” He smiled and looked back at his saddle, making the final arrangements.

He turned to you and said, “I’ll give you a leg up,” And jabbed a thumb at his pony. You nodded and approached the animal. You put your hands on the ponies back and bent your leg waiting for him to help. He leaned forward so he could whisper in your ear: “Wrong leg”. You blushed quite profusely at that and switched legs. He heaved you with such strength he nearly threw you over the other side of the pony. You made yourself comfortable behind the saddle before he hooked his foot in the stirrup and carefully mounted so he didn’t knock you off.

“You ok?” he asked over his shoulder.

“Yep!” you smiled. He nodded. You were excited to see new lands even though you feared what they harbored.

“If you need to hold on to me when we get going you can,” he said, making you both blush despite yourselves.

A few moments later Thorin called out: “Company ready?” in a deep booming voice, “Aye!” They all replied in unison. “Company, move out!” He bellowed and urged his pony forward. The rest followed behind him one by one. When your animal lurched forward you grabbed Kili's waist for dear life. The company was silent till they got to the end of the forest. You had your cheek pressed against Kili’s shoulder and your chest against his back. The fur of his coat was very soft against your face as you turned your head to look over his other shoulder. You yawned but didn’t realize you did it right next to his ear and breathed down his neck. He determinedly kept his eyes on the pony ahead of him to keep the blush rising in his chest at bay.

“You can take a nap if you need to,” he said over his shoulder in a soft voice for only you to hear.

“That sounds like a good idea,” You yawned again. You buried your face in the soft spare fabric of the hood on his back and cuddled closer to him to rest your head on his shoulder. You closed your eyes and sleep swiftly took you. He knew this because he could feel your breathing slow on the back of his neck. He was happy you could sleep and couldn’t help his smile. You shifted now and then, turning your head one way then a while later turning it the other. Kili tried not to talk or move too much in fear of waking your delicate slumber. By midday, you felt very well rested. You took a deep breath and released your grasp on Kili to stretch your arms above your head, arching your back to wake yourself up. You quickly slipped your arms around him again, so you didn’t fall.

“Good morning!” He chirped, “Well afternoon really,” he corrected with a smile, “Sleep well?”

“Mhm,” You hummed against his shoulder “I haven’t slept that well in a long time,” you said thinking back on the restless weeks before your arrival in Middle Earth.

“Good,” He nodded. “Happy I could be of service.”

“Yes, you make quite the comfortable bed,” you replied.

An easy silence settled between you for a while. You contentedly watched the landscape pass by while he kept the pony on the path.

“What’s a good weapon for a beginner?” You asked knowing you needed to start wrapping your head around the fact that you could be stuck here forever and needed to protect yourself. He thought about that for a few moments.

“I’d have to say a bow,” He shrugged, “I don’t know honestly, lemme ask Fili,” he kicked up his pony to walk faster to be next to his brother. “What is the best weapon for a beginner?” He asked him. Fili glanced at you and thought for a moment.

“Hmm I think a sword would be easiest,” He replied, contradicting his brother.

“A sword?!” Kili said incredulously “No that’s one of the harder ones,” He swatted his hand as if to swipe the words from the air.

Fili scoffed “For you maybe,” he said barely keeping his teasing smile under control “But not to the rest of us, my weapon-challenged brother.” That made you giggle. Kili huffed and pulled his horse back, so he wasn’t beside his brother anymore.

“Are you that bad with a sword?” you asked, trying not to laugh too much.

“No!” he exclaimed, “I’m just better with a bow and arrows,” he pouted.

‘Awe he’s so cute when he pouts’ Your thought took you by surprise.

“Perhaps you can teach me, Archer,” Your voice was lower than you intended, making you both blush. Your breath ghosted over his ear making him shiver just a little. He turned his head to look at you over his shoulder, his face so close to yours. He looked at your lips then deep into your eyes holding eye contact.

“Maybe I will,” he said in a deep gruff whisper that made you gasp and goosebumps rush over your skin. He turned back and smiled; proud he could get a rise out of you. You huffed and distanced yourself from him by leaning back, needing the space to calm down.

As night drew closer, Thorin led the company to the edge of a forest and found a shallow cave, more like a cliff overhang to make camp for the night. He told Fili and Kili to take care of the ponies and Oin and Gloin to make the fire. After the meals had been handed out Thorin told you to take Fili and Kili a bowl. You walked through the forest and found them looking at a downed tree in panicked awe.

“Something took 4 of the ponies,” Fili said to you, hoping you’d have the answer to their predicament.

“Yes, and…” you nodded at them trying not to panic yourself “What are you going to do about it since it’s your problem?”

The brothers decided to see what took the ponies and if they could handle it themselves, no need to worry Thorin, right? You followed them as they tracked the pony-nappers. Kili hid behind a tree and peeked around, you hid behind him and peeked over his shoulder. 3 large trolls were something to worry about, and a sight that made that dreadful feeling drop from your chest into your stomach. Your grip on Kili’s coat tightened.

He turned to you and said in barely a whisper, “Go back to camp and tell Thorin”.

Fili was immediately against it, huffing and puffing from behind his tree. Kili shrugged and motioned with hands as if to say, ‘What else would you have us do?!’ Fili huffed again and snuck around the tree. He tried to cut the rope fence with his sword, but he took too long. The trolls caught him. They were deciding ways to eat him when Kili looked at you in alarm and told you to go back to camp. You ran as fast as you could.

“Ponies! Big grey troll things took the ponies!” You said out of breath pointing the way you just came “Fili…in…danger”. Thorin cursed in dwarfish and rallied the company. Balin told you to keep your distance, so you didn’t get caught in the fight.

The dwarves fought bravely but were captured. Bilbo bid for more time while you thought of a plan. You heard the trolls complain about daylight coming and that gave you an idea. You saw the trolls had made camp in the shade cast by a large boulder. You wedged a branch under the rock and used the leverage to try to roll it. It was very heavy, and you were not. It took everything in your power to push the branch to roll the boulder down the ditch edge it rested on. The trolls were washed in sunlight, turning them to stone and freeing the company. They cheered when you stepped over the branch and into the clearing. You helped them from their confines and smiled and blushed when they praised your good job.

Back at camp the company gathered their things and discussed what to do now. Fili suddenly hushed the company.

“Warg howls in the distance,” He whispered to Thorin “They are coming!”

“RUN!” Thorin yelled at the company. Following Thorin everyone started running. You all ran as fast as you could onto a hilly plane sprinkled with trees and boulders. You ran and ran till the Wargs finally caught up. They began to encircle you. The company fought the beasts, taking them down as still more came at them. You went to hide behind the rock formation but fell into it instead. You climbed out as the Wargs were closing in.

“Down here!” you called “There’s a passage this way!” you slid down to make room for the others. Thorin was the last one, as he slid down a horn was blown near the entrance to the passage.

“I can’t see where it leads, do we follow?” One of the dwarves asked.

“Yes! We follow!” Thorin barged through the dwarves and led the company through the narrow pass. You all walked for a few minutes, but then Thorin rounded a corner and slowed as he realized where he’d unwittingly led the company. The rest kept walking around him, but Bilbo stopped and said in admiration: “Rivendell”. You stopped as well to take in the view before you. It was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. A small town on the side of a mountain with water flowing from beneath some of the glittering structures.

As Thorin led the company over a bridge, you grabbed Kili’s arm to steady yourself as you looked around and took in the ornate statues and architecture of the front steps of a large building. A man much taller than you or the dwarves approached the group.

“We would like to speak to Lord Elrond,” Thorin said through gritted teeth. He was swallowing his pride for the betterment of the quest, that much was clear through his clenched fists and tense shoulders.

“Lord Elrond isn’t here,” The elf said regretfully.

“Then where is he?” Thorin’s patience was growing thin. A horn was sounded on the other side of the bridge you’d just crossed. Everyone turned to see a group of horses galloping towards them. The dwarves began shouting in dwarfish and closing ranks with their weapons ready for battle. You were pushed into the very center of the circle as tall horses and riders circled you. They stopped suddenly and the one on a black horse dismounted.

“My Lord Elrond,” The elf who first approached you said with a bow.

“Lindir” Elrond bowed his head at him then turned to the leader of your group, “Welcome Thorin son of Thrain,” He looked over the dwarf “You have your grandfather's bearings.”

“I’m afraid I know you only from the stories my grandfather told me,” Thorin was doing his best to be polite. (You were later informed that the stories were mostly about him being a ninny.)

“I’d like to offer you and your company a taste of our elfish hospitality,” Elrond said with a warm smile.

“Does that mean we’ll eat?!” Bombur called from the back. The company chuckled at him.

“Yes Bombur, that means we’ll eat” Dori replied. The company cheered at the prospect of a full belly and a warm hearth.

Not long after, you were sat next to Bilbo and Kili at a large table. The salad appetizers were very good despite the dwarves not liking green food very much. You giggled at their jokes about how bad the music was or how they wanted chips and meat. Thorin was sat at another table across from Elrond discussing something you couldn’t hear, but you could tell it pained Thorin to be in the other man's presence.

You turned to Kili beside you. “Thorin looks constipated,” you said in a low voice barely containing your laughter “He can’t even pretend to be enjoying this”. Kili looked over at his uncle and laughed with you.

When the meals were served there was boisterous laughter and general dwarfish shenanigans, the usual at any merry dwarfish gathering. Bilbo looked like he was having PTSD from when they were doing the same at his house at the beginning of the quest. At the end of the meal, Thorin and Balin disappeared with Elrond to discuss a map. You asked Kili if he would escort you to the markets with as much innocent girlish need as you could muster to solidify your security. He agreed and walked with you through the corridors and to the market. He helped you get a fair price on a bag, a blanket, and a bedroll. The next thing you needed was clothes to blend in.

“What do the women around here wear exactly?” You asked him. He shrugged.

“It depends, I guess” He had his hands shoved in his pockets as he followed you around the clothing stalls like a puppy.

“Gee, that’s a big help.” You teased.

After some more wandering you found a stall selling clothes that looked your size. You purchased a dark blue form-fitting tunic that stopped above your knees and had slits on the sides that went up to your hips. It paired very nicely with the brown pants and brown coat with dark blue highlights you bought as well. Kili helped barter with the merchants since you didn’t know the fair price of things here. In another section of the market, you bought spools of black, blue, and pink thread. You put your belongings in your new bag.

“Are we done?” Kili asked, sounding slightly annoyed. He was ready to go back to the others and be away from so many elves. You sighed and rolled your eyes playfully and nodded. He led you through the busy crowded markets by holding your hand. You were thankful he was in front of you so he couldn’t see your blush. You made it back to the group, who had set up camp in a courtyard garden at the end of a hallway. Just as you arrived two female and two male elves came down the hallway.

One of the males stepped forward, “The bathhouse is ready for you now” he said to the group.

“Bath?! We don’t need no stinkin’ bath!” Exclaimed a dwarf from behind the fire. The rest heartily agreed, not ready to drop their pants on elvish soil it seemed.

“I’d like a bath” you timidly said, not wanting to make a fuss but very much wanting to be clean.

“Very good mistress dwarf, if you’ll follow us,” one of the female elves said. You were tense as you followed the four elves down the corridor, not sure what you were doing.

“You best go with her lad,” Dori said to Kili, “You never know what an elf might try to pull.” He glared at the back of the elves as they walked away. Kili nodded and ran after you.

“Y/N!” He called making you and the elves stop.

“Oh, change your mind, Kili?” You asked with an innocent smile, happy to have his company.

“Yeah, I guess so.” He smiled too.

You were led to a large door that opened into a covered hot spring that flowed over the balcony to create an assumably gorgeous waterfall. Columns lined the outer edge of the room which was split down the middle by a cloth partition. The male elves walked to one side of the divider with Kili in tow, while the females walked to the other. The elves asked that you wash under the heated shower of water off to the side before entering the hot springs. They left you to your own devices.

“I’ve never seen anything like this have you?” You asked Kili across the large room.

“No” He smiled at the wonder in your voice from seeing new things and making discoveries. He thought it was very cute.

You placed your bag and new clothes on the vanity in the corner. You undressed and stepped under the warm shower. You used the bar of soap you found to wash your hair and body. It was the best-smelling soap you’d ever had the pleasure of experiencing.

“Hey, Kee?” You hollered.

“Yeah?” He yelled back.

“Do you plan on keeping your soap?”

“No…Why?”

“I’ll take it then. I’ll need extra anyway,” And you were so happy you did. That soap made your hair silky smooth and stronger than ever. You rinsed the suds away then stepped into the hot springs.

It felt luxurious. You couldn’t help but moan a little as the heat pulled every knot and tense muscle from you. Relaxed, you floated in the steamy water.

“You still there Kili?” you asked suddenly nervous he’d left you.

“Yeah, I’m here” He replied, “We shouldn’t take too much longer though, Thorin could be back any minute and who knows what kind of a mood he’ll be in.”

That made you enjoy the bath a little faster. Not long after you began drying off and getting dressed. You took the hairbrush and beads and other miscellaneous hair trinkets that were on the vanity. You looked in the mirror at your new outfit. It fit as you thought, though a little snugger in some places than others, hugging your curves to allow for movement yet still baggy for breathability and insulation. Overall, a nice ensemble.

“Ready Y/N?” Kili asked from across the partition.

“Yeah, you can come over, I’m just packing my things.” You replied, folding your old clothes, and putting them in your bag with the rest of your things.

“Here’s the soap” He handed it to you.

“Thanks!” You smiled at him; you simply wrote his flushed cheeks off to the hot water. When you stood, he was able to get a much better look at you in your new clothes.

“A perfect fit I see” He smiled, looking you up and down. He couldn’t help but imagine what you’d look like wearing nothing but his tunic. A line of thought he blushed at and quickly willed away.

“Does it look alright? I don’t know how it’s supposed to fit” You fussed with the hems and the folds trying to make them lay better. He grabbed your hand to make you stop fidgeting.

“You look great,” he said with a genuine smile. You smiled and nodded your appreciation.

You walked back to camp, making moneyless bets on what mood Thorin would be in when he returned.

As you approached Fili saw you in your new outfit and said, “Well look at this…” Making the rest of the company look at you too, “Our wee lass looks like a bona fide middle earther now!” They cheered at your near-complete indoctrination.

“Now she just needs to learn how to fight like one.” Bofur quipped from beside the fire.

“Then I wouldn’t need any of you to protect me!” You put the back of your hand to your forehead feigning a damsel in distress, making the company laugh. You sat on the ground beside the long chair Kili was now examining his weapons in and leaned against it. You held out a stone fish figurine to him.

“As a thank you for helping me” you cleared your throat “…And for being my friend.” You couldn’t meet his eyes, but you knew he was smiling a little around his reed pipe. He took it from your open hands. You know it wasn’t much but it’s all you could offer.

“Maybe one day you can return it to the ocean,” you said, referring to your previous conversation.

“Maybe I will,” he smiled down at you with genuine fondness.

“Bombur!” Bofur called before throwing a sausage to his cousin. The table, which took skilled elfin craftsman months, even years to craft and carve out of solid wood, collapsed under the massive weight of Bombur. Everyone erupted in laughter, it was nice to be part of the group and share in the merriment.

~~

Thorin stopped Balin on their way back to the camp, “We should leave her here,” He said, “She is a liability.”

Balin had a terrible sinking feeling in his round tummy when he thought of splitting you up.

“So what if she is, Thorin?” Balin said near pleading. “Have you ever seen your nephew that happy or open with a girl that quick before? I’ve never seen the lad so engaged in a conversation that didn’t have to do with weapons before last night. So what if she dies on our quest, at least we gave them a chance to happen, and if fate finds their pairing favorable it will all work out!” Balin was desperate to keep you and the young prince together if only to keep the sinking feeling at bay.

Thorin huffed, “Very well, but her blood is not on my hands,” He walked away and into the camp.

~~

Thorin and Balin returned, and the tone became slightly more serious—slightly. The company settled and laid their bedrolls in the grassy parts of the garden. You laid yours out as well and prepped for sleep by removing your shoes and coat. The night was warm enough that your blanket would suffice. You looked up at the stars wondering if any of the constellations were the same as back home. You cuddled your coat to your chest relishing the feel of the soft fabric. The low conversation between Fili and Kili, while they sat on watch across the fire, lulled you to sleep.

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

[dizzzydancin]

Lights, Camera, Mouthwash!- Chapter 4

Long time, no see! It's been a few weeks since I've updated, but my interests have shifted, PLUS I'm working on another fic on top of this, so I'm keeping myself busy! That being said, LCM won't be going anywhere anytime soon, so enjoy the latest update!

College has just entered the spring semester—you know what that means! Final projects are being assigned, and luckily for Jimmy, he has a brilliant idea. Introducing: Mouthwashing- a psychological horror film written by Jimmy himself.

Enjoy!

[julianbutnotliketheking]

Overview

Chapter 1: Inverted Things

Word Count: 2, 709

Everything felt loud. All Sal could hear was a sound of all kinds. Chatter, things dropping, the scraping of rubber soles, everything. 

It was the last day of the year. Well, at least for Sal and Ash. Larry had graduated a year ago, and Todd was a year behind them. Everybody else in their year was excited, yelling, talking to one another. Sal wished that he felt happy for them all. He wished he was just as excited as them. Instead, he had backed himself into a corner with his hands pressing hard against his ears. Instead, he was shaking as every tiny noise overwhelmed him. It made him feel nauseated. He couldn't stand it.

Every time Sal thought he might be able to try and relax, he tried to pull his hands down. The noise only got louder when he did. It got louder and louder, and louder, and he could not handle it anymore. Tears pricked in his eyes and his legs started to feel weak. 

"S..." 

There was finally something distinct in the noise that had practically static. Sal couldn't quite figure out what it was saying, though. It blurred into all the background noise.

"Sa..." 

The voice spoke again, and now it sounded warped. It sounded like when you flick through radio stations and hear small snippets of each one.

"Sally."

Everything fell silent. There was no more noise, and now all Sal could hear was the overbearing silence and the strange voice. It called out to him, and he cracked open his eyes. In front of him was a man, and he lit up the darkness that now surrounded him. He was illuminated with a dull pink light, and there were large pipes that came from his hunched-over body. They were bright, so bright that it hurt Sally's eyes to look at. A bright blue was now burned into his retinas, and he could see it even when he closed his eyes again.

"Sal, there's something you need to do."

The deep voice rang out into the void surrounding him and Sal, but it hurt Sal's head to listen to. He had to cover his ears again and try to silence it out. Nothing helped, though. The voice was loud as ever, reverberating through Sal's ears. It hurt. His whole body hurt.

The man craned his neck up and looked at Sal dead in the eye, and his mouth started to move again. 

"Sal, I need you to listen to me."

Then it all ended. The static was back, and Sal's head pounded. His eyes shut again, and he held his head tightly in his hands in a desperate attempt to ease his pain, but to no avail. He felt so sick because of it, and he swore that the pain threatened to spread over his whole body. He started to ache, but as quickly as it started it had stopped.

The noise had passed again, and this time when Sal opened his eyes he was greeted with the sight of the nurse's office. He wasn't quite sure how he got there, but at least he knew that he was safe during whatever that episode was. 

Sal looked around the room groggily, still feeling like his skull was about to split in half. He sat very still, other than trying to take in his surroundings, and he noticed there was a figure in the room with him. 

Travis sat opposite him, but he didn't move. He didn't speak. It was freaky. 

"Travis?" Sal spoke up, his voice quiet and barely piercing the silence that hung between them. He got no reply. 

"Trav?" Sal tried again, and now he was trying to see if he had any reason to be in the nurse's office. Usually, he would have been in a fight of sorts, but there was no evidence of one anywhere visible. 

There was still no reply, so Sal began to stand up. Only then did Travis seem to notice him. 

"What are you doing?" Travis asked, and he spoke as if he hadn't just been staring blankly at nothing in particular. He stayed freakishly still like some kind of cryptid.

"Uhm, I was leaving?" Sal answered a tad nervously. He wasn't sure what exactly was going on, and honestly, he wasn't entirely sure if he wanted to.

"Are you okay, you were just staring... blankly. At nothing."

Travis looked at him as if he was stupid. As if he was making stuff up. 

"What're you talking about, Sally Face?" Travis asked, clearly unimpressed by Sal. 

"Nothing,," Sal mumbled, uncomfortably shifting his weight on his feet. He edged his way towards the door, then lifted his calloused hand to the handle.

"Cya, Travis."

Sal didn't wait for a reply before he left, because he didn't know if he wanted one. When he got out into the linoleum-lined halls he felt far more uneasy that he did before. Travis's weird behaviour was one thing, but the pure silence everywhere else was worse. It wasn't a normal kind of quiet where you could still hear the buzzing of the electricity, though. There was <i>nothing</i>. Absolutely nothing. 

Sal walked through the halls, and he swore the layout had changed mildly. He walked down the math hall but instead saw science classes. He walked to where he remembered the main exit being, and found himself in the courtyard. It was weird, but he tried to ignore it and shake off the funny feeling he felt in his stomach. 

Each step he took after finding the courtyard seemed to grow louder and louder. Sal swore to whatever Gods there were, if any, that sometimes he would hear a second set too. Anytime he looked around, though, he saw nothing. Nobody. 

Finally, he found the exit, and he hadn't ever left a building quicker. He shoved the heavy door open with whatever strength he had and stepped out into the cold air outside. It was raining, but there was no smell of rain. There was barely any noise of it either. And here Sal thought he would be able to feel a bit more normal again if he got out to go home. He didn't even know if school had ended, but he could only assume it must have because of how empty the building was. Other than Travis... Alone, in the nurse's office.

Sal continued his walk, making his way down a long road. He looked around and saw nothing out of place. He must have just gotten lost in the school. He must of, somehow. Maybe he was disoriented from the migraines he had earlier. That was the only explanation he could think of. Maybe that's what was making him feel so strange right now. Maybe he was just out of it.

Praying that the only reason everything felt off was because of the strange episode he had earlier, Sal continued his way home. The road was empty, but that was nothing strange. Nockfell was a small place with very few people. Most of the students came in from the other towns around the place. 

Sal's unease didn't go away at all as he walked home, but he tried so desperately to ignore it. It was probably his anxiety playing up. He hadn't taken his meds, probably. He probably forgot them this morning, as well as the other meds he had to take. That must be why he felt so off. Maybe. He wasn't sure, in all honesty. How long had he been off them?

Finally, though, he approached the apartments. They were the only thing so far that everything seemed normal about. It stood where it always did. There were a few windows with the lights on, and the paint on the walls outside was spray painted over or chipping. It looked like a horrid place to live, just like it always had. Just like it should. 

Sal pulled out a key that he needed to get into the front door of the complex, stuck it into the keyhole and twisted. He stepped inside, the small water build up on his soles leaving footprints as he walked along the hall. He walked through the hall, and then stopped at 102. Perhaps speaking to Terrence could make him feel a bit better. He was always sweet enough. 

Knock knock knock.

The letterbox opened, and Sal could see two little eyes peering through the gap.

"Good evening, Sal," Terrence greeted cheerfully as ever. It relieved him to hear that voice. He would usually greet Terrence on his way to or back from school. Or just whenever he felt like saying hi before or after going somewhere. The two had become rather acquainted.

"Good heavens, isn't it a bit late for you to coming home from school?" The tone that Terrence spoke in changed instantly when he realised the time, and that only made Sal wonder just how late it was morekm. The sky was no good tell, it was mid summer. 

"Oh,,," Sal mumbled, fiddling with his hands as he tried to think up some kind of excuse, "I had detention." 

That was the best thing that he could think of. It seemed to work, though, because Terrence let out a small understanding hum.

"Oh dear," Terrence said softly, and Sal could see him shaking his head through the letterbox. "That's the first you've ever had, isn't it?"

Thankfully for Sal, Terrence didn't sound annoyed or disappointed at all. Despite never having seen him properly, he felt close to Terrence. He honestly spoke to him more than he spoke to his own father at this point.

"Well, it was bound to happen some day. I trust it was the fault of somebody else, and you were just dragged into their trouble?"

Sal just nodded, and hummed out a soft 'mhmm'.

"Did Larry come and see you when he came home?" Sal asked curiously. He assumed that he would have just gone down to the basement, but maybe he spoke to Terrence too. The two of them usually did that. They felt quite bad for the man, really. Always feeling like he should hole himself away in his apartment. Sal understood how he felt, given it was something he did because of insecurities.

"Larry?" Terrence hadn't ever sounded so perplexed before. Had he somehow forgotten who Larry was, or was he just playing some kind of joke on him? 

"Yeah, Larry. Johnson? He's Lisa's son?"

Terrence started muttering to himself, but none of it sounded very sure of anything. Sal hadn't ever been more confused in his life.

"They live... Down in the basement?" 

Sal tried desperately to give more of an explanation, but nothing seemed to help at all. Sal didn't understand why Terrence couldn't remember Larry or Lisa. 

"Don't worry about it, Terrence," Sal finally said, putting a pause in the mans thoughts. "I should be getting home, Gizmo will be needing fed."

"Of course," Terrence said gently, "Fare well, Sal."

Then he closed his little letterbox and disappeared back into his bedroom. Sal took a few slow steps away from the door, and then he made his way to the elevator at the end of the hall. With unsteady hands, which was nothing unusual, he pressed the button to call the elevator to him. 

The doors opened to beckon Sal into the small space, and he stepped in. Raising his hand to the number pad, he realised that something was wrong about it. All the buttons were there for each floor, but there was no card slot for the basement. It just,,, didn't exist. He stared for a few seconds, then slowly pressed the button for the fourth floor. The pad beeped as he did.

The doors closed behind him, locking him into the elevator until it reached where it wanted to go. It beeped as it passed each floor, and then gave a louder beep as it got to the fourth floor. The doors opened, and Sal stepped out. The paint on the walls was still chipping, especially near the top where moisture from the upstairs came through. 

He walked towards door 402, and then pulled his keys out of his pocket again so he could unlock the door. He stepped inside, and locked the door behind him.

"Gizmo!" Sal called out, expecting to hear a soft 'murr' and a thud from him jumping down off something. He didn't hear that, though.

"Dad?" This time he spoke more confused sounding. He wasn't particularly calling out for the man, but more wondering if he was there. Seeing another person could help ground him back to reality, and whatever was going on now would stop. Henry of all people would make sure that he knows that he's acting crazy. 

He got no reply, though. The silence rung out around him as he walked further into the livingroom. 

"Daaddd?" Sal called out again, hoping that maybe the man wasn't listening. Or maybe he was at work? Sal prayed that was the case. When he still got no reply, he made his way through the house to his room. Gizmo was nowhere to be seen. 

Sal kicked off his shoes as he entered his room, and it was only now that he realised he wasn't carrying a bag or anything. He hadn't taken anything home from school. 

"Shit,,," He muttered quietly to himself, and then walked over to his bed. On his bedside was his walkie talkie, which he stared at for a couple minutes before deciding to pick it up. 

He pressed the button, "Larry?" And let go. Static buzzed out. There was no reply. "Larry, this isn't funny."

Sal had no clue what was going on, or how Larry might have managed to pull off some kind of joke like this. He was certain, though, that <i>had</i> to be what was going on. Larry has to have coordinated all this, because who else would? Who else would put this much effort into something just to fuck about with him? 

Sal put his walkie talkie down, hoping that Larry was finding whatever kind of joke this was funny, and he sat on his bed silently. A couple of minutes passed, and the talkie started to make weird sputtering noises, which Sal swore made him jump out of his skin. 

"S.... S.... S," The talkie hissed out sounds that Sal couldn't understand, but he picked it up anyways to try and listen better.

"Sal," He finally understood something, but it wasn't Larry talking to him. No, it was the same voice from earlier. The one attached to the strange man hooked up to the oversized life support. 

"I need you to listen to me." That was the first coherant sentence Sal could understand. His hands shook a bit, but he didn't quite know why. He wasn't scared. He didn't feel scared. He felt almost like he had experienced this before. 

His head started to ache again as the voice spoke to him, but nothing made sense. All the sentenced were jumbled or static-y. None of it made any sense, and at this point it was just stressing Sal out that he couldn't understand the man that was desperately trying to reach him.

Nothing eligible came out of the man again. The attempt at speaking came to an end, and Sal could feel his head pounding. Despite the silence, Sal swore that he could still hear the sounds of the gargled voice. It echoed throughout his walls and infected his brain. He couldn't stop hearing it.

Sal felt strange, but he put his walkie talkie back down on his bedside and stared at it for a few more minutes, waiting in case anything else happened. It stayed silent. 

With the day that Sal had, he decided that he just wanted to sleep. He didn't care what the time was, whether it was strangely late or strangely early, he just wanted it all to be over with. His head hurt, and his eyes felt heavy, and his legs felt weak. He began to strip himself of his clothes until he only wore his boxers, then placed his prosthetic onto the bedside too. 

[hellcheerficdatabase]

Valentine’s Day 1990

Author: a_strange_inkling

Rating/Warning: Explicit

Chapter Count: 2/2

Description:

“Happy Valentine's Day.” He murmurs softly when he pulls away to breath, tracing his nose along hers. She beams happily, lifting her chin and chasing after his lips, wanting more of him. All of him. It’s never enough. She strokes his jaw as she keeps kissing him sweetly in fluttery gratitude. “Was that my surprise?” She ponders out loud, fingers in his hair as she lays back against the pillow just to gaze up at him in wonder.

“Oh no,” he replies with a breathy laugh. “That was purely selfish.”

Tags: alternate universe- canon divergence, alternate universe- everyone lives and nobody dies, post-vecna, 90s au, established relationship, smut, fluff, alternating POV, two-shot, status: completed

[darkimpala1897]

Steve sitting with Eddie looking at him.

Steve: "Eddie have you slept with anyone other then me?"

Eddie shakes his head.

Eddie: "No I was pure before I was with you."

Gareth, Jeff, Kevin, Chrissy, Jason, and Andy could be heard snickering from wherever they were. Steve looks at him shaking his head.

Eddie: "Okay I can explain."

Steve holding back laughter: "Of course you can."

[sterekeverlasting]

our love is as boundless as the sea itself

fic by @evanesdust and @sterekbros, featuring art by multiE for the Sterek Everlasting Summer 2024 Edition

You can read the magazine online here

Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Additional tags: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Chef Stiles Stilinski, Marine biologist Derek Hale, Getting to Know Each Other, Falling In Love, Derek Hale Loves Stiles Stilinski, Stiles Stilinski Loves Derek Hale, Top Derek Hale/Bottom Stiles Stilinski, Meet-Cute, Ocean, Beaches, Beach Sex, Walks On The Beach, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Blow Jobs, Happy Ending, No Angst, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies

Summary:

Derek tried not to stare, but Stiles was even more attractive up close—with lips that he absolutely shouldn’t want to kiss, considering they were strangers. He had to mentally shake the thoughts away because this wasn’t like him. He cleared his throat and nodded toward the trucks. “So, do you have experience with turtle rescue? We’re always looking for more volunteers.” “Yeah, yeah. I used to help sometimes with my mom here when I was a kid, but I’ve been volunteering in New York for the past seven years.” Stiles rested his hands on his hips and glanced around the beach before his eyes returned to Derek. “I’ve read one of your pamphlets though.” Stiles’ eyes trailed down and then up Derek’s body. “How many do you think are out here?” Was he…? Derek paused, his thoughts momentarily scattered by Stiles’ blatant once-over. Usually, he didn’t care for attention like that, but Stiles’ gaze was oddly flattering. It was different somehow. Refreshing. “We’re estimating hundreds,” he finally responded. “But we won’t have a clear idea until we’ve scoured the entire area. It’s going to be a long day. Think you’re up for it?” Derek hoped he was. ...or the one where a chance encounter led to more.