#constipation is not what you think

[arttsuka]

I LOVE Teen Stan and Ford, it’s sad they don’t get drawn enough, so thank you so much!

Does Ford ever help Stan when he gets overstimulated? Or maybe when he has a rage response and suddenly starts crying and calls himself stupid?

Here's the other post with Ford

[deletedelight]

DAVEKAT YURI BEAAAMM

[haveihitanerve]

When Bruce first woke up he thought everything was normal. He stood up at three, stretched, did his work out routine, and headed down the stairs to grab a granola or smoothie maybe, one of the ones Alfred absolutely detested, and maybe check in and see if Tim was still awake and force him to bed. He also made a mental note to call Jason, he had missed their latest phone call and if he didn't make an effort Jason would think everything was over and would act fine but be torn up on the inside. And Bruce could not let that happen. “Morning alfred.” He hummed, walking into the kitchen. Alfred looked up in surprise. “Master Bruce! You are awake early!” Bruce sent him a look, digging around in the fridge. “Ha ha. It was one time Alf.” Now the butler was looking at him strangely. Bruce frowned, closing the fridge door. “Are we out of shakes?” he asked. Alfred looked at him questioningly, but Bruce just shrugged, moving to the cabinets. “Thats fine. Hey did you see Tim yet? Or is he still in the cave.” “master Bruce what ever are you talking about?” Alfred asked, finally seemingly having had enough of his nonsense. Bruce turned in confusion. “What?” He asked. Alfred shook his head. “Are you ill? Perhaps we had best forgo the entertainment tonight if you are not feeling well.” Bruce frowned. “What entertainment Alfie?” Last he had checked nothing had been on the calendar. Alfred looked at him worriedly. “Oh dear. Master Bruce it is not like you to be forgetful.” Bruce shook his head. “Alf. What entertainment tonight?” Alfred sighed. “Why we are to go to the Flying Graysons Circus tonight, how had you forgotten?”

[kiingbiing]

The cage… I have a vision

[korrasamibottles]

For @wukoweek2024 Day 5: Angst:

“I've had moon peaches before, Wu."

"Mmmm not like this you haven't,” Wu says, plucking a slice from the plate and reaching for a bowl of hot pepper sauce, his mouth curling up in a smile. His lips look petal-soft, and Mako drops his gaze down to his own hands.

“Isn't that for the dumplings?” he asks, picking at a hangnail and tracking Wu's movements out of the corner of his eye.

“So what?” Wu shrugs and spoons a bit of the sauce onto the peach, bright red over deep gold like an arc of flame at his fingertips. “You can do whatever you want.”

In which doorknobs are melted, insects are rescued, and Mako learns there's more to life than just surviving.

[moonfurthetemmie]

oh uh. so my essay about Lucidity is getting way longer than I meant it to, because I ended up figuring more shit out as I went, but I'm impatient to share my newest fucked up beloved so i'm just going to share some basics + the heroforge ref

JR is gone. Their head quarters literally blew up and there's only a handful of survivors. He didn't take it well.

he took it so badly in fact that he eventually ended up with goddam Jet and Obsidian, because it just so happened that they're looking for the same group that blew up JR to get rid of them! And since Lucidity, in shock and grieving and absolutely livid, is hunting them, they decided to team up.

yeah he lost his goddam mind <3

this whole thing started with me going 'what if i made ds dream evil and made him and obsidian kiss. could i do that?' and it evolved into "so there's a gay evil poly going on, but that's side story because right now we're watching lucidity's descent into evil and low-level madness as he hunts down [group] and otherwise just helps obsidian and jet achieve multiverse domination. because he's having fun."

He's also realized that he does care about nightmare a lot and really doesn't want to kill him, so there's that I guess?

oh the meme squad knows what's happening. they may be the only other ones from their MV who knows but I'm not certain yet

also Lucidity's versions of Obsidian and Jet are presently nicknamed Shale and Nightshade, respectively, though this may be subject to change.

While Lucidity's presence has made the situation in JMV much much worse overall, he has managed to get certain specific things to stop. jade and zuli are doing a little better now.

someone should probably stop them but honestly i have no idea who or how so they're just going to run free and cause severe problems for everyone. except nightmare. lucidity won't let nightmare get involved in any way, shape, or form, including trying to keep him hidden away in the manor. nightmare must go home and stay there.

(Nightmare, Cross, and Error are digging up all the information they can find about what's been happening in JMV. they have no idea what they're going to do with this information, because they're real sure they can't do shit, but they're looking.)

[feitansballsack]

Feitan

18+ bc feitan is LITERALLLYYY an adult get out of here children.

It wasn't always like this. The quiet, the tension, the hushed conversations and silent agreements. No, it wasn't always this dull. Living in meteor city has proved to be challenging, and as you could expect, not a challenge that you wanted to face. However, when your failure of a father threw your family into an enormous debt, only to say "screw you" and dip out when the loaners came to check, you don't really have many options. You shouldn't really know any of that either, but your mom ran out of excuses. Now you and your mother live in meteor city, the home of the beloved and well taken care of- not. This had been your home for a couple years now, you've grown accustomed to its ways and are reaching your ages of teenagerhood. "(reader) you need to go out and make friends. I'm worried about you" Your mother coughed. While you've grown adjusted, the health of your mother has not.

"Why do I need friends when I have you? You're my BEST friend." You giggled, happy to not be alone in this place and have a warm home to come back to with her. "Yes but... Well nevermind. But do play outside for a little bit sweetheart." Your mother smiled, reassuringly waving you off. You nodded, and smiled, taking off out the door to one of the only existing playgrounds in meteor city. The walk was nice, a small breeze in the air (however not big enough to carry the stench from the center), and it was slowly warming up enough to leave your area without a coat on. Realizing you were close, you began to skip towards the swingset. Swinging was peaceful. The playground was one of the few things from your life before that you could retain, for who knows how long, in this current. The swinging motion was peaceful, and allowed you to view the sky in all of it's shades.

Suddenly, you felt the chains holding the swing jerk, bringing you to a stop and almost tipping you. Before you was a short and scraggly looking kid, who looked like he was barely 4. He had knotted hair and cold eyes. Who was this twerp? "Get off." The practically baby spoke, short and flat. "No." "...No?"

"That's right. No."

He stared at you puzzled, as if he was used to be able to intimidate others. You smirked at this thought, a small fry thinking he's tough. Upon seeing your smirk he glared, and pushed you hard out of the swing. "Get off." He said again, this time with a small smile in his voice. He was already celebrating? Jeeze. "You're short AND mean. Pick a struggle toddler." You giggled, regaining your balance quickly.

"I'm not toddler! I 13." He pouted, an angry look on his face.

What the fuck?

[the-casbah-way]

some people will look at my current wip and say that malcolm running his hands through jamie's hair as he sleeps and singing him old scottish songs is out of character but to that i say a) no it's not just hear me out and b) suck my fat cock you can't stop me from making those old men experience Real Human Emotions

[prettyboykatsuki]

listen to me. i believe in poly vbs. but it did not happen at once. there is an order to it. it starts with toya and kohane. introvert x introvert. then an is like i kinda like the guy my girlfriend is dating. and then akito in a complete separate situation is interested and kohane and toya is delightfully smug about it.

akito and an in true hater spirit completely refuse to acknowledge the other as romantic partners. then one of them starts feeling fond of the other. its a massive shit show. they become partners begrudgingly and only show affection to each other when the others are not around to give them A Look about it. are you listening

[eightmakesonebraincell]

*Gasp* you are a teacher?!?!?!?!

I wonder what u teach ur kids🙄

What subject do u teach and what class??

-constipated anon

Ps. Why are u a teacher???

How are u a TEACHER?

I can't imagine u being a tr

Do u call ur students 'lil shit'?

i work in paediatrics so yes i work in schools (and clinics) but not as a teacher LMAO

also fun fact but i don't actually swear irl nor over text i literally only use swearing when i write to add ✨literary emphasis✨ or ✨characterisation✨ sO I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I CALL MY KIDS BY THEIR NAME OR SWEETHEART OKAY 😭

[otterandterrier]

every time I come across that ridiculously popular han/leia fic where just straight up from the summary I can already tell they're going to be at their most stereotypical ooc versions, I get very salty, like... there's way better stuff out there y'all, you should be reading that even if it doesn't have 10k kudos

[rainbowgod666]

Law: listen all im saying is NOT not... not. That i dont do NOT have feelings(n't) for mugiw-

OP!alex, done with his shit

Shut the fuck up truffle you are going to fuck luffy and so help me Oda i will shove the One Piece up your ass if you dont stop using your emotions to shut it off 😃

Law: (currently realized how fucked he is)

[widevibratobitch]

so i am singing that vitellia in the end... but at what fucking cost.

'you gotta sing this softer'

'what'

'this is mozart'

'this is vitellia'

'this is mozart'

'im singing about how much i hate this mf and want him dead before the end of the day'

'this is mozart'

'i wanna murder a guy'

'this is mozart'

'...'

'softer. gentle. mozart'

'...ok'

[spikeyjo]

also uh im kind of not thinking about it much because its insane. but if everything goes right (and i mean a considerable amount of things that probably wont go as planned) but if they DO... i will have a major surgery in like two weeks

[aubins]

she is rasping and literally crawling toward yuri with big wet eyes because the week has been very unkind to her and she's a little scraped up from getting caught in a wilderness trap but don't even worry about it. however! she reaches them and her fluffy head perks up.

"yuri! yuri, we weren't on the same island last week, and bernie didn't want to miss you just in case—" rustle, rustle. from her belongings, she fishes out a lilac-ribboned box. inside there is makeup, carefully curated and dorothea-certified of course, along with a flower accessory she'd made herself. its blossom is the color of their eyes, which she is doing her very best to meet now, thank you very much.

(in fact, she's trying so hard that it pinches her brow just slightly. eye contact will always be her worst enemy but god if she isn't pulling out all the stops to show her earnestness. they deserve that much and plenty more.)

"happy, uh, early birthday...!" the gift is ushered into their possession. then her arms flap at her sides, and she blurts: "please don't get eaten by alligators, okay?! wait, are there alligators on this island? w-well, don't get eaten by anything! please. um, yes." nod, nod. "i don't get this whole competition thing, but you're still bernie's dear friend. and bernie really, really wants to keep being friends by the time your next birthday comes, too."

a pause. then, lips curl into a silly, fond smile that bernadetta can't help but make. "a-and it doesn't have anything to do with this weird island, but, um... you make me happy. so i hope this makes you happy, too."

Yuri Leclerc does not celebrate their birthday.

Sometimes, there are exceptions. Like the treats and surprises of a certain red-haired girl or the odd greeting here and there from Abyssians who have known them for long enough to learn it. Yet no matter how routine these exceptions start to become, they will always be just that: exceptions. Because, for so long, the day they'd said was theirs never really was their birthday anyway. Because, a long time ago, the boy who was born on their actual birthday died on the streets of Adrestia.

“Bernadetta,” is their hummed greeting as their gaze flicks over her, pleased— well, always pleased, really, to see her, and even more so when she appears to be in relatively one piece— their usual smile curling at the corner of their lips. “That for me?” they ask, tone teasing as she fishes the box from her belongings. It's not even my birthday yet, is the follow up, already upon the tip of their tongue when—

“Happy, uh, early birthday...!”

And Yuri blinks, stunned for a moment, because no, they think, they will never quite get used to these exceptions. Even as Bernadetta shuffles the gift into their hands, babbling that they shouldn't get eaten by alligators, if there even are any— “No,” they think they hear themself say automatically, first instinct always to reassure, “I haven't seen any alligators. And I won't get eaten, so don't even worry about it.”— and that they're her dear friend— “...ah?” is the only sound they make in response to that one, a little quiet and a little confused, because there's no automatic answer to it, not one that they want to give to such a genuine effort anyway.

They glance at the box now in their hands for a beat, then pull it open gently, as if afraid it might break. “You didn't have to,” Yuri says, gaze immediately attracted to the collection of makeup within. They know, of course, what it costs, and suddenly mean it doubly so. “Must've cost you a pretty penny. You should've spent it on yourself.” And even if some people would say it just to be humble, humility has never been one of their features. They know what they do and do not deserve.

After all, Yuri is no stranger to gifts like these. Makeup and jewelry offered to them because only the finest of accessories should decorate the most beautiful dolls— and never for free, of course, because nothing in this world is ever for free, and they are quite used to trading both face and body.

They kept them all, no matter how they loathe them sometimes. They may be prideful, but they are not foolish. There is a trunk under the floorboards beneath their bed in Abyss filled with their hoard, bountiful enough to convince someone they are a magpie and not a mockingbird. Bountiful enough to remind them that, now, the Savage Mockingbird can take a noble's expensive gift and slit his throat while wearing it if they wanted, then toss it without a second thought to disappear within their collection.

But while Bernadetta is a noble, she is not like them. (But how do you know? asks a voice. Yuri silences it. They just do— they must believe that.) Not because of this island, she says next, and as much as Yuri can guess where her mind tends to spiral to, they wonder if she can do the same. Because they would have thought it next, yes, wondered about an objective handed to her in the interim that perhaps needed completing or some other game their hosts wanted to play. Even with the reassurance, they might have still wondered.

But maybe it is because it is Bernadetta, because she had known them before they were Yuri, and know all the secrets and vulnerabilities that come with that, because no matter how many times she says she has forgiven them, Yuri is used to bracing for betrayal, that the mockingbird pauses. Briefly, yet completely and utterly struck still mid-flight.

And then they believe her, even when the first instinct ingrained in them is not to.

“It...” they start, then pause. Correct themself. “You make me happy, Bernadetta. With or without the gift. But thanks for thinking about my birthday.” Because it's nice to be thought about, in the end. If it needs to be put simply for her, without the mess of their past, then it— and she— makes them happy. Bernadetta doesn't need to know the rest. Yuri grins, then plucks the flower accessory from the box to hold out to her. This one, they can think about without straining their smile. No shadow haunts it; this one is just Bernadetta. “Help me put it in my hair?”

Next birthday, we'll still be friends. But they do not say it aloud. This one is a promise all for themself. Yuri resolves not to break it.

[fellhellion]

yadda yadda we all have different interpretations of art, but i also feel like "miguel is absolutely retraumatised when mayday crawls all over him and peter is a bad friend for not noticing" just kind of. ignores the intended comedic tone of the scene? as well as the fact miguel has doesn't tense up in the aftermath of baby hold + peter ribbing him. he relaxes.