#conjoined pov | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mikeylo · 4 months ago

Text

A Reason to Stay, Bound to You

Length: 13.2K+words

Genre: Fluff, Sullyoon x M!Manager (age gap, let just say appropriate range), in-depth detail of an idol manager work, 2nd POV style.

Summary: You Y/N being Nmixx manager got into feeling complication with Sullyoon, one of the Nmixx's members (Same goes for Sullyoon with her manager). Multiple instances happened between them in which only strengthen their bond deeper than a mere staff or worker. A controversies strike the group costing your job as their manager. Will their feelings stay intact?

Disclaimer:

First time posting a story on here or ever, English is my second language, technically it is third but the second one in terms of which came first.

Props to my friends for beta read my fic to lessen the mistake in there.

Credit to her for giving the fic such a lovely name. It's so good it freaking make sense

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

Nmixx manager is a diligent worker, always provide what Nmixx needs. That is you, Y/N we are talking about. All Nmixx known for extrovert aura, but Sullyoon is otherwise, well she did have to blend in with the energy of her group in which she already gotten used to it by now, but her old self still lingers around. With all due respect, other girl is easier to interact with, but Sullyoon is a more on the difficult side. You Y/N, their manager also once a shy timid little boy understood her demeanour clearly, it makes her heart flutter you are able understands her without much communication. The moment when two path crosses its way to conjoined, it all started back in the dressing room where the love spark first ignited in midst of a cold season. Being a caring manager you are, you decided to prepare some set of blankets for the girls. So, you entered the room with the folded blanket.

“Anyone needs a blanket” you voice out to the members. The room was hustling with staff going in and out ensuring the showcase smoothly progressing displaying every group distinct music colour, Nmixx the group you are taking care of was not an exception. You hope for the best award every given to them

“Aniyo (no)” member replied in unison except the one at the far back of the room, Sullyoon. At the corner of your eye, you saw Sullyoon turning around with puppy eyes and slightly protruding her lips looking for you. She assumed you will head out again since the member doesn't need the heated blankets, so she was a little bit let down as she was kind of cold by this frigid atmosphere. “Here you go” astoundment was shown in her eyes staring in appreciation towards you. You didn’t notice her heartful stare as you carry on facing the crowd in the room. “You girls need anything else?”

“You need anything?” Your remarks broke her out of her trance. She shakes her head a bit, eyes fluttering waking up her sense back, “No….… opp- manager-nim” she softly spoke. Red hue on her cheeks can be seen but you sensed it as a fleeting thought because you got a lot to take care of, part-time, siblings college fees and any other breadwinner was tasked for.

“Manager Oppaaa, get me pumpkin spice Americano juseyo and…...” in baby voice, Haewon make a call from the other side of the room. Being their manager for almost two years, you are still amazed by how explosive their energy is, the iconic trio, Kyujin Jiwoo Haewon are unstoppable force, adding Lily and Bae is just a cherry on top.

“Make it three oppa” Kyujin interrupts Haewon while holding her left hands up with the number three. You can sense Haewon glaring her eyes out at Kyujin as you take note of the order on your phone. The so-called twin maknae, Kyujin and Jiwoo always teaming up on their unnie. They even sit next to each other in the room.

You inquire their usual order from the rest of the girls, Lily and Bae. You tilt your head a bit since Sullyoon decline her daily caffeine order. You found it weird especially today with her, as if she's not being her usual self. You clearly notice all the member comfortably call you “Oppa or Manager oppa” beside Sullyoon. Well, it's a given as you regularly call her by her stage name. When you were first introduced to the members, they present themself by their stage name which is their real name but only until later you found out Yoona is her real name. By now it's a habit calling Sullyoon her stage name and looks like it doesn't bother her at all. Little did you know, she does get bother by it, seeing you calling every member by their real name make her heart feel unease.

“The order will be here, see you guys in a bit, got some errands to do, ask manager unnie if you guys need anything, FIGHTING!” with fist clench showing unwavering support to them.

Being the head manager usually handling company, production team and event organizer applications for the group, making sure they are up to date. Most of the time you get it done quickly a week before. Having no pending task, in the meantime you watch the members do their idol work from behind the scenes, assisting manager unnie taking care of the girl’s wellbeing 24/7.

Afternoon and evening schedule are filled with photo shoot, interviews and live broadcast on a music shows. Since it takes place at the Seoul broadcasting station, ending a few schedules at the station with an interview with the media outlet at the front entrance with fans cheering in the background.

Unfortunately, your stomach has been feeling uneasy for the past couple of hours as there's some technical issue earlier at Magazine shooting session making the intended schedule falling behind. You are tapping your feet away waiting behind rows of camera witnessing the girls do their interviews, finishing two to three interviewer question, bidding goodbyes to the fans and walk off to their van. To add salt to injury, the interview also taking a few minutes more than what has been planned, so you must guide the member quickly. That's what your hope for, but fate got better plans for you.

As you lead the group and assist the van’s door. The rest of the girls went on the van, but you saw the back of the Bae’s head covering the incident you never expected to happen. A commotion happens to Sullyoon with a media reporter. The reporter looks like on the last thread of his job and would do anything to keep it, even if he must break the standard moral of conduct. The media reporter was crossing the belt barrier holding onto Sullyoon wrist and bombarded her with questions.

“Mr……please…. stop it” She murmured out her discomfort and wince a bit of pain due to the tight hold. To not cause further the havoc. She grabs her left fist with her right hand to make an attempt to flee the situation. Bae hesitantly come closer to Sullyoon trying to snatch her away from the man. “Mr..…we got other schedule to attend… maybe on the next fan meeting” a chance was taken by Bae but doesn't budge the man’s hold on Sullyoon’s wrist.

“You guys are the reason Jini was kicked out of the group, she never left voluntarily!” The reporter shouted attracting more witnesses to the scene. The girls were startled by the thunderous claim by the man. Jinni issue was settled years ago, even Jinni herself say it herself.

You watched as everyone attention was pointed to them, this matter will only worsen as time goes on, you take big step towards them. Yanking the reporter’s hand off Sullyoon. It takes every ounce of your energy to not put a dent on the reporter’s face. With a lot going in your head from delayed schedule, controversial claim to the sight of frightened Sullyoon really boils your anger.

“Kindly put your hands off the idol Mr, they have fixed schedule needed to follow.” You spoke with teeth clench while trying your best to carve a smile on your face, some even may see your veins pulsing on your temple.

“Yahhh, hands off you basta-” The man was ready to throw hands but reconsider his choice after seeing you seething with anger through a fake smile as it wasn't worth to have broken nose and jaw over his job. He broke off your hold and flee the area. You didn't notice your grip earlier left him to massage his wrist.

“Are you guys, okay?” You gently hold on both of their shoulder checking for any injuries. You quickly ushered them to get into their van. After closing the door, you jog your way to the driver seat and drove off.

--------------------------------------

From time to time, you glance at the rear-view mirror to check on the girls, especially Sullyoon. Being assaulted must be putting a lot of weight on her mental health. You cursed yourself for not doing your job properly, probably you should have stayed close when guiding them, or maybe you should have been more attentive about the group schedule last week, then this wouldn't had happened. Today’s occurrence overwhelmed your mind to the brim.

“Oppa, we have arrived” Haewon tapped your shoulder from the backseat. Haewon’s call break you out of your trance. You look over your shoulder and multiple sets of eyes are directed to you. The corner of your eyes detecting your surroundings, makes you realise that you have driven them to their next schedule location instinctively. They have a schedule at Ajou University for rehearsal for upcoming University Festival consert and you brought them here with your mind going autopilot mode. “Your sick piece of shi-” once again you mouth curse word to your carelessness of not being conscious throughout the drive, it could have led to nightmarish accident. “You guys go ahead; I will catch up” signaling them with the back of your hand to go ahead. They all went out leaving you alone in the van. It was one hell of a week you think to yourself. Taking side quest while having a job to take care others was not the most ideal life choice, but the extra cash was needed.

Being a people pleaser really has took a toll on you, having most trusted friends swindle your money with debt still calling your name like student loan, monthly bills. And on top that regular hospital fees for your ailing little sister, Jiu. You wouldn’t want to complain about family burden but it’s still your responsibility. Well, you always hoped being that very unlucky main character to suddenly be granted with the most beautiful reward like those slices of life comic you used to read. You chuckle at your own ridiculousness.

With you having a laugh at your life stories. Sullyoon look back at the van before entering the tent area for the rehearsal. She can't really see you through the window as it was black tinted. But deep within her heart, she hoped that everything would go your way.

For the past years working together, she somewhat able to relates herself with you as both of you are very good at hiding your pain. Back when you have a fever, you pretended to drink an energy drink, but it was actually coughing syrup. You left her flabbergasted taking the sight of others believing your act.

On the side note, it leaves her a hint of excitement and connection knowing both of you have something in common, but it does not last long as hiding one’s pain also hurts her. Like the intense bruise on her wrist after the incident with the reporter that you missed.

“Yoona-yah, hurry up! We have to go” Jiwoo brings back Sullyoon back to earth seeing her standing far from the pack. “Wait up, I’m coming” Sullyoon take one last glance towards the van but this time from afar both of your gazes met as you step out of the van. Both of you stares into one another. Even though her sensory experience is being occupied by the intense swelling of her bruise, Sullyoon still able to shows you her toothy smile and crescent shape eye. Her smile really captivates you that you almost didn’t notice she’s waving at you lightly with her right hand. You sheepishly wave back with an equal smile but grasp something is off with her overall condition.

A sigh of relief as you see her back to her usually demeanour as that what you assumed, she’s a strong girl given a heavy responsibility to hold such beauty in this thorny world. As she turns back to catch up to her member, you furrowed your brows in confusion catching her conspicuously awkward movement. Seeing her stop mid-way to check on something. Witnessing her grasping onto her left wrist with her other hand before disappearing into the cluster of tents. You may haven’t had a meal for today, but your gut’s instinct was stronger than usual after what you had just witnessed.

You grab available med kit and rush to their tent. Despite not being fond of your overthinking traits, but it mads you think she’s been affected by the earlier incident in some way. You ran through manifold rows of tent from various group and almost missing their designated tent. Once you parted the curtain, at your dismay the members weren’t there. Checking the sign pasted outside maybe you could've gone to the wrong tent. “They already went on stage” You heard a voice beside you, seeing Manager Unnie sitting on a plastic, focused on her phone,

Without much thought, you make a beeline straight to the main stage while slither your way avoiding bystander staff. Then you found yourself by the foot of the stair leading up to the stage, since it was an outdoor concert so there are a lot of deployable stage light rigged on some beam and trusses. From there you saw the members getting ready for rehearsal, doing some stretching and vocal warm-up. Adding humorous element to the scene, Haewon poking Lily by the waist while she trying to do vocal warm-ups.

You scanned through the set while walking up the stage’s side stair and your eyes land on the person you're looking for, Sullyoon. She's doing her stretches while she's entering her pensive mode staring into the horizon. One of her few habits you happen to see quite often throughout the years, she always shies her face away when you caught her pondering her mind for too long. But for today, I don’t think it’s the case.

Since she stands close to the steps, the clanking sound of metal stairs from your footing makes her turn her head around and stumble upon seeing you with a med kit by your side. She was a bit startled by your unexpected presence and the sight of the med kit only making her anxious about what's going to happen next. From your perspective, her demeanour changes from her usual ethereal looking beauty to a timid little girl after she’s been caught red handed.

You motion her to come here before you are rummaging through the med kit searching for an ointment and a bandage and she hesitantly obliged. As she stands in front of you fidgetingly, you signal her to give her left hand. She hesitantly places her hand on top of your right palm. As you gently twist her wrist to see the damage, horror came down to you as the bruise patch was quite sizeable with deep colour. Being a manager, acquiring basic dermatology is essential, your concerned only tripled knowing it’s not what you consider a normal bruise but a severe one. After having a knowledge of her injury, you ruffle your hair in frustration, now you wished you had let your intrusive thought of busted the reporter’s nose to extinguish your wrath.

With wide eye you look up from the bruise to her eyes to make eye contact. As if telling her telepathically how serious the injury is, and she is hiding it, but she avoids the mutual glance and averted her eyesight to the ground waiting anxiously for scolding from you. But you are more obliged to attend her injury as it’s a serious one.

“ Does it hurt?” you whisper softly while maintaining your gaze on her. With both of your hand on her left wrist, positioned both thumbs on the bruise mark, just a mere graze of your thumb on her skin causing her to wince in pain. You felt sympathy for her. It really reminds you when you had to endure endless throbbing sensation for weeks on your right thigh from slipping down small steps and not having a luxury of proper treatment. Since she's under meticulous care of their manager, she doesn't need to experience it.

“This is a lot more serious than I thought, you should head back to the tent for now” you comment while spreading some bruise-healing cream on her injury. Since haven't got any cold agent around, you opt to go for immediate treatment for her and wrapping bandage loosely around her wrist.

“Bae-yahh! Come here” you called Bae to come over and continued to inform that she will accompany her back to tent. Subsequently, the rest of the member also joined in as they heard you called Bae. As expected, everyone went bonkers upon hearing the news about Sullyoon getting hurt by the incident, Jiwoo being the sensitive one might make one confuse who’s the victim as she’s about to shed some tears. Lily on the other hand being the sweetest she is, giving Sullyoon a patting at the back and lean her head onto Lily’s shoulder. Upon seeing the eldest giving affection towards to younger one, the rest of the member also joined the love surrounding Sullyoon, in contrast to you awkwardly trying to hold onto Sullyoon’s wrist as you fully aware of how excruciating having a bruise and severe one at that.

Being an Idol in a country that's known for it makes up the competitive nature so any schedule must move on. Meanwhile, you asked Bae escort Sullyoon back to their tent carefully. You advised Bae to hold Sullyoon arm closely leveled to heart level to scale down swelling rate. Conversely, you picked up their pre-ordered meals for tonight from a nearby diner run by a lovely ahjumma (Aunty). Unintentionally, it was the restaurant you used to visit frequently when around the area. And you remind yourself to also buy Sullyoon a sling and a cooling agent pack.

“That's quite a big order you got there, what's the occasion?” You were a bit jolted overhearing a voice close to you as you were patting your attire for your wallet at the counter to pay. You saw a familiar figure with some partially white hair with back slightly hunch due to old age, the restaurant owner. “It's for my sisters” you sheepishly smile back at her, I guess you could consider the members as your little sister knowing how close you guys’ bond together. You are dumbfounded knowing your mind can clearly vision where exactly you left your wallet but to only forget you left it back at the tent.

“Don't worry, the meals are on the house” the old women uttered makes you feel guilty, exchanging your forgetfulness for a free meal, such an unfair trade. “You boys must work relentlessly these days, let me tell you…. don’t overdo it like my deceased son” those final three words meant a thousand sweat and tears both from the son and his mother. You grow up without much preference of your parents other than countless cut and bruises as a remembrance of them and final memory of news about their car accident.

The only driving force that’s keeping you moving is those who are under your care. Sometimes you can be selfless to keep other in check and not worry about yourself but hearing Ahjumma’s words make you rethink on how you would approach the future. You really should take care of yourself better, ending your life accidentally by your own hands is not something you want to imagine of your loved one crying over your passing.

Your heart ached just from picturing them tears up. Your only little sister, your best friends, naughty ahjussi that helps you out of the rut, Nmixx member, Jiwoo, Kyujin, Haewon, Lily, Bae………. Yoona.

*Lub-dub Lub dub, “How does pronouncing a name can make my heart beating so fast?” you voice out internally and you opened your eyes recalling yourself you are still in the restaurant. Both pair of eyes from the cashier and Ahjumma gave you a confused look. To not make your face even redder, you bid them farewell and pick up the meals. As soon as you walked out, you facepalm yourself replaying the moment that’s just happened.

Driving back to Ajou University was never a difficult task but the lingering feeling both coming from the mind and stomach make it so. You chose to think the discomfort coming from your stomach is because of you haven’t had any proper meals aside from snack bar so you felt relief that it doesn’t have anything to do from those earlier thoughts back at the diner. But your minds are playing tricks on you, “Why am I keep thinking of her?” You shake your head every once in a while, but it doesn’t go. It only replaying memories of her but in different scenario. “Manager-nim where is my blanket?”, “Manager-nim, can you help me open this up? “, “Manager Oppa, how does Yoona look?” Haewon asking you about Sullyoon’s dress.

You are about to go crazy with this ridiculous thought repeating every instance of her with you. Fortunately, your mind has more tricks up its sleeves. Constructing a scene beyond your experience. The mind started its magic, and you can see Sullyoon is skip walking towards you with both her hands placed behind her. You think of moving out of the way, but you feel your body is stuck in place. Neither your legs nor your hands can be move. As she about to close the distance, you closed your eyes preparing for a head on collision. But then, you felt both of your hands were held by a set of soft and delicate finger. You opened your eyes to assess the situation and you were displayed by the closeness of her profile. You were charmed instantly, never ever have you gotten this up-close inspecting her allurement. You were aware of her beauty, but this only makes you to not avert your eyes away from her. As you had fully submit to your mind’s desire thinking this is the climax, but your mind knows what you truly wished for. Sullyoon tenderly squeezed your hands and say your utmost desire “Call me Yoona…………. Y/N Oppa”.

You screamed at the top of your lungs not as a figure of speech but literally, so loud that pedestrians walking by look at your van. Thankfully, with black tinted window and you stopped at the traffic light unconsciously, you once again saved face from embarrassment. To make it worst, your throat went sore and dry, it really starting to sting when you try to make a sound. You stopped by a convenience store to buy some cold packs and a sling as you nearly forgetting the most important matter.

Only couple of turns left, you arrived again at the parking lot of Ajou outdoor theatre. Not forgetting their meals in hand and post purchase item. A huff of exhaustion escapes you as you walked down the familiar path toward Nmixx’s tent. With your mind more focused than before to end the day on a good note, you settled on the improvised schedule in your head as they will have dinner here and end the day off with a radio show.

As you parted the tent’s fabric to enter, you saw the girls already finished their rehearsal and waited. “Meals are here” as you placed it down on the nearby table. “What's it, oppa?” Kyujin being the first scavenging through the plastic.

“It's Bibimbap (White rice topped with diverse toppings)” you answered while looking around where did you place your wallet. You swear you put it on top of the table. Searching around the tent, ducking under the seat, maybe it slips out of the tent, just a mere thought filled your mind with dread. With the enjoyment atmosphere from the members ensued in the background over a homemade meal, you noticed two members were absence. You reckon they went to the washroom.

You headed outside to check if your instinct were true. You spotted Bae and Sullyoon headed your way from a potentially washroom. Bae was holding onto something while leisurely maintaining Sullyoon’s wrist at heart level but what's intrigued you was both were looking at it so intently like solving a puzzle. “Where did you guys go?” You questioned them insensitively with arm crossed and raised eyebrow as you eyed the very familiar item in their hands.

“Oh, Oppa is here” Bae was the first to notice your presence and followed by Sullyoon with a slight stun perceiving your existence. Bae are oblivious on how searing Sullyoon’s wound is while holding onto your lost wallet, you can only let out unenthused snicker. “Oppa, who’s this?” Bae extended her arm out showing the inside of your wallet while being clueless of her intrusion of privacy, casually asking you who is the younger girl in the picture. “Little sister” responding with smirk, your peripherical vision detect a drastic change of Sullyoon expression from a stern look to a beaming smile. Unbeknownst to you, in the depths of her heart was a hopeless and resentful devotion upon seeing the picture in your wallet illustrating a girl figure where you wrapped your arms around her shoulder. Never once in her life being this thrilled upon hearing some news, like Christmas comes early, there’s still possibility of her uttermost wish to be granted.

“Foods is here too” Bae lightly throws the wallet up in the air leaving Sullyoon catching and grasping onto the contraband. Bae’s action spooked you a bit, it was not about seizing the wallet but the moment she lets go of her hold onto Sullyoon’s wrist got your instinct kicked in quickly holding on to her wrist. You stared menacingly in the direction of where Bae’s headed. Observing Sullyoon getting left out by Bae only adding more evident to her selfless personality. You bet Sullyoon tell Bae off to not worry about her to much as you just ordered Bae to keep watched on Sullyoon.

“Manager-nim……. your hand” Sullyoon shyly tug your sleeve to regain your attention, as you regain focused, oblivious that you unintentionally holding her hand after you noticed her response. You swiftly retrieved your wallet from her hand as you commanded her to hold her wrist with her other hand to lessen her injury. Although, this is not the first time she held your hand, it always sends butterfly in her guts. The major size difference between hers and yours coloured her cheeks red acknowledging that fact that it could easily wrap your hands arounds hers easily. The rough and sturdy exterior of your hand cradling her tender and delicate palm only contributed to her sensory overload.

With the minor mishap out of the way, you swung your sling bag around to the front to search for the sling you just bought earlier. “Here, put this on” you hand her the sling, and she hesitates, unsure about wearing it. “Manager-nim……. I don’t think I need this, it’s only a bruise” she mildly protests, unable to keep eye contact with you. You take the sling off her palm and do it your own way. You politely request her to lift her left arm to put the sling on, it was done in an instant. But the one on the receiving end was flushed to oblivion, having your arm nearly wrapping her around, your warm breath tingling her ear as you try to connect the slings end. Your hand slightly brushes her hair sending shiver down her spine. A hint of your perfume mixed with your natural scent initiate a malware in her mind.

You take a step back, appreciating your work. “Look, doesn’t take long at all to wear” feeling a bit proud of yourself, not aware what kind of blushing mess you made Sullyoon as she stared down to the ground hiding her face with her hair flow with the gravity. Worried slowly overcomes you upon seeing her current form, is she, sick? Does she really do not want to wear the sling? You leaned in to properly judge the situation. “Are you sick? your face redder than usually” you mutter to yourself, but you are not the only who heard it considering both of your face are inches away. Like any typical method to determine whether one has a fever, using the back of your hand will do the trick. You gently sweep her fringe aside and place the back of your hand against her forehead. A burning sensation started to take its place into your hand.

“Manager-nim stop it!!!!” Sullyoon let out a shriek of embarrassment with fist clench by her side. You raised your hand in defends from any potential blow. You peek between your fingers taking in a sight of fully flushed Sullyoon with an annoyed expression towards you. “Ehem ahhh G-Go eat up inside, there’s bibimbap ready” you stutter and nod tensely towards the tent inside, avoiding eye contact with her after what just happened. Sullyoon stomped off into the tent leaving you scratching your head in confusion.

Brushing the thought aside, you make your way into the tent. Everyone already munching on their respective bowl of bibimbap. “Oppa, ant chu eaching?” Jiwoo mumbled; her mouth filled with rice. “I will, just have to update the company our current status” you replied to Jiwoo detecting the scene Lily slapping her hand for talking with mouthful out of the corner of your eye as you whipped out your phone. Their sibling dynamic proving they are more than just worker but more like a family. You typed away on your phone all the details to inform about Sullyoon’s injury. “Sullyoon-ah, I need to take picture of your injury for proof” calling out her name without honorific giving her goosebumps essentially pronouncing her full name, Seol Yoona. Luckily, you proceed getting the proof without causing another scene.

“How long does she have to wear it?” Haewon posed a question piqued everyone attention. As soon you submit the report, you turned and faced Haewon before answering. “At most 3 weeks if you casually only applying balm on it, but at short as 1 week if it’s under attentive care like wearing a sling, healthy diet, gentle exercise and avoid re-injury will suffice. “It’s going to be a hassle wearing that around, how the media will react if she wears that in public?” everyone focuses on the one commenting, Manager unnie. Hands on your chin, you reflect on your assistant point of view. “Hmmmmmm” you hummed in contemplation as you walk around the space with everyone anticipating your answers.

You stopped your track standing in front of Sullyoon. “Sullyoon-shi, does your hand feel pain when you move your arms around” almost in interrogating tone you question her. “A bit but I feel it is more convenience to- Ahhhhh” sharp pain shot through her joint as Kyujin were sitting beside her raising her knee to scratch her ankles inadvertently hitting Sullyoon’s arm. “Oh My God Sullyoon! Unnie, Are you okay! I’m Sorry!” she freaks out getting everyone on their feet. Promptly grabbing the cold pack, you went and place it onto her affected area and proceed to check-up on her. Your observation conclude that her breathing gets heavier, seeming that her body is trying to cope the sudden twist on her swollen wrist. Beads of sweat started forming on her face

Upon seeing Sullyoon condition worsened, you instantly act voicing out your game plan. “I will drop you guys off at the radio station then I will take Sullyoon to the nearby clinic” everyone nods in agreement. The reason for your urgency was because Seoul traffic gets packed during the dusk hour. By looking at Sullyoon’s current state, it’s only matter of time she will lose consciousness from enduring overbearing pain. “I will get the van closer; you guys steadily assist Sullyoon to the van” you tried to sound as calm as possible despite the critical tension to prevent any mishap occur along the way. You are not in this alone, anyone mistake will hold accountable.

You hasten your movement towards the van and with quick manoeuvre you parked it close enough for them catch up. You grimace at a sight of Sullyoon limping with her arm draping over Bae’s shoulder. With everyone buckled up, you put pedal to the metal heading towards the designated location. “Manager-unnie, can you book a VIP health check-ups at a nearby hospital?” With manager unnie doing her part, conversely you pick up steady pace on the road while not forgetting others safety. Suddenly, the situation in front of you caught your breath viewing a massive traffic jam. “Will we make it in time Oppa?” you imagine Haewon sticking her head out behind the sits. You looked closely through the rear mirror, a sigh of relief upon seeing Sullyoon’s breathing pattern has steadied. You saw a glimpse of her eyes slightly opened and nods in assurance at you that she’s doing okay.

“Everything will be under control, believe me” comforting those under you in critical moment what makes you stand out from others. Ironically, you may construct deep attachment easily with this attribute, but you will have a hard time to let go of that person. Going back to the matter at hand, you reroute your path finding alternative for better chance of arriving early as progressing slowly is better than stuck in a never-ending traffic. Even with the situation toned down, you are still concerned about Sullyoon’s wellbeing and it’s your top priority for now.

Fortunately, with 15 minutes to spare. Everyone disembarks from the van leaving Sullyoon in your custody and splitting our respective path. “See you guys in a bit after I check-up on Sullyoon at the hospital” you bid them farewell through the window and off you went. You take a glance at the rear mirror, you saw Sullyoon soundly asleep like a baby koala latching onto its mother. Seeing her in slumber state only shows how straining the pain is putting onto her mentally and physically.

Upon arriving at Seoul National University Hospital parking space, you looked around you to determine how crowded it is. It’s a given as it’s on national level public service. It wouldn’t be pleasant walking around with an idol by your side. You looked behind your seat, Sullyoon is still sleeping. You felt guilty to wake her up, but you must for the sake of her health. You jumped out from the driver’s seat and slide the door open. The heavy sound of the sliding door woke her up randomly, she looks over her shoulder scratching her eyes.

You proceed to put her cap and mask on to prepare for check-up. You wear your sneaky outfit with a mask and the same black cap on, even though you are only a mere manager, you don’t want to risk of being caught. There’s been multiple occasions of you accidentally inside of Nmixx photos taken by fan, it wouldn’t be surprising if anyone recognize you. The walk to the receptionist was a bit of a hassle as Sullyoon still half-awake from her nap while clutching onto your arm. The reservation registration was done quick with only needing to post your assistant name and trudge to meet up with private medical officer in a consultation room. “Manager-nim, I want to take a nap” you didn’t complain much despite you basically support half of her weight as she essentially leaning onto you with her head rest on your shoulder.

Slowly but surely, you make your way crossing the doorway. “Reservation under Mrs Kim” you state your assistant’s name to the doctor inside for customer identification. You explain her condition to the doctor while she’s still drowsy with her head lean on your shoulder. The doctor instructs you to seat Sullyoon upright in the designated chair. The doctor begins doing his job and start removing Sullyoon’s sling. You were occasionally answering questions thrown out by the doctor as he keeps on his progress. How does she get the bruise? What are the first air treatment that you give her? Did you apply ice pack on it? And you also add that her bruise might be getting worse as there was a small mishap of twisting the joint.

The doctor clarifies more about her bruise severity. The more you understand her condition, the more you treat her with empathy. He highlights the extreme discomfort from the swollen bruise can put heavy stress on the patient’s mind. This justify the reason Sullyoon is drowsy because she’s exhausted put up with the pain. “Manager-nim….”she looks up at you, her lips slightly protruding and her sleepy eyes pleading, as she leans her head against your torso.

“Who is she to you? Your girlfriend?” the doctor asks but shrugged it off. The doctor interrogates you in the meantime he’s spreading arnica gel onto her bruise. You go for simple answer “Idol and manager” as his question got you acting on high alert. You heard light chuckle from the doctor “Don’t worry sir, our customer’s privacy is our priority” as he just finished wrapping up Sullyoon’s arm. You are amused by the doctor sense of humour and were reminded to take medication at the reception.

Luck was in your favoured, you felt grateful things went smoothly as you step into you van with Sullyoon taking the passenger seat beside you. A quick glance at your wristwatch telling you got ample time to even send Sullyoon back dorm before getting the other members back at the radio station. Without wasting a single second, you head straight to their dorm.

--------------------------------------

There’s nothing more enjoyable than driving on a road in which the traffic has thinned out. Saving you more time to grab a bite as you are starting to feel the spike poking your abdomen. As you put the van to a halt in front of Nmixx dormitory, you hear Sullyoon’s yawn and stretch wide awake. “Good morning” you jokingly said to her. She understood the assignment and greeted you back with a yawn, in which you find it cute because of how down to earth she’s in spite of how ethereal she can be.

“It’s time to go to bed, I will need to get back to fetch the member” you utter with a giggle seeing her abrupt aegyo refusing your idea to go to sleep. She whines with a subtle pout; you are about to go crazy with her unexpected adorableness. But at her core, she feels the most comfortable around you just right after you earnestly taking care of her.

You disregard all her cute attacks and carry on bringing her belongings. You hoped and wished everything unfolded as intended, well it did but not the way you least expected. With her bags in hand and Sullyoon clinging onto your arm looking up to you in admiration, you aren’t complaining but this really shouldn’t be happening as you stand still waiting for the elevator.

“Sullyoona-yah, can you get the keycard” you are not falling for her doe eyes, but at least she follows your order. You started to think is this what you called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)? You don’t remember reading an article stating being clinging was part of the disorder. You take your shoes off, lead the way to their living room. With your eyes squint to resist her charm, you command her prepare for bed and go to sleep but she got better scheme to do. “Manager-nim, want to have ramyeon with me?” she requests cutely.

“Naah, I must go back at get your other members, okay? Plus, I’m not hung-” a growling sound stops disrupt you. Your eyes went wide averting towards your stomach. To make matter worst, you heard a giggle right behind you and you don’t want a whole week having the members replaying the same stories on how loud your stomach growl after being offer have ramyeon. You can’t be too certain Sullyoon be able to keep her mouth shut, she will possess the best sleep of her life reimagine this moment with you.

At last, you stayed for ramyeon with Sullyoon in the living room. “Dig in manager-nim” you side-eyed her as you scanned for potential hidden trick up her sleeve but instead you examined her to be going back to her usual self. Despite her inviting for ramyeon, you did all the cooking right at the coffee table supposedly since she got one hand on hold by a sling. You grab two set of chopstick and bowls, serving her one and one for your hungry belly.

“Jal meokkesseumnida (I will eat well)” both of you said in unison before dig in your respective bowl of ramyeon. You hummed in satisfaction savouring the tasty goodness of ramyeon. It wouldn’t satisfy your hunger fully, but it will enough for now. You both enjoyed your ramyeon in silent, but Sullyoon was the first to break it. “Manager-nim…. why are you always so nice to me?” you are in the middle of your last slurp, but her question made you stop and look at her baffled. You swallowed the last strain of ramyeon and reply to her answer defensively “What do you mean? I treat everyone equally”. Sullyoon elaborate more by adding more details proving her claim. She revealed that her member telling her that they see you treat her a little bit better and to illustrate her points clearer, even she and her other members agree that you can telepathically understand Sullyoon better than anyone else, as if you read her thoroughly. She even lay out scenarios where you read her like a book, the member say that they must tell you exactly what they want then you will bring it to them, Sullyoon on the other hand just by reading her expression and body gesture you as if able to decipher what she needs.

You were left in awestruck by how detailed her accusation is towards you. Your brain couldn’t be able to construct a legitimate excuse to defend yourself as everything that she said was accurate to you. With the amount of evidence essentially exposing you, you might as well be transparent to her and explain your whole side of the stories.

“Look Sullyoon, with all the evidence you lay out to me, you could say I’m biased, I’m not trying to refute that claim because from your guy’s point of view it looks like I’m favouring you”. You accentuate your word carefully as to avoid misunderstanding. You continue your clarification by expressing that Sullyoon looks the most vulnerable out of all the members. You even suggest that she’s unable to open-up to you for the first 3 months of you being their manager. Of course, it would imply that you must somehow adapt to each member on how they supposed to be treated. You realized that you are going off track a little bit too much about defending yourself as you started to see Sullyoon eyes starting to get watery.

Before anything going too out of hand, you grab and grasp her right hand tenderly with both of your hand and reassure her about your stance that she’s not a burden nor a cause of unfair treatment towards her members. “Actually Yoona-yah. Whenever I see you, you remind me of myself back then, shy and timid. You can be hesitant at times, but I know you are doing your best to keep up with the world. I know how exhausting it is to take every burden on your shoulder alone. That’s why I’ll take extra measure to assist you. Don’t compare yourself with other members, you will have your time to shine. Other member like Haewon, I know she will do well on her own in a long run but you, Yoona-yah you just need a little more time and care to build yourself up so you can be on par with others.”

You are in deep stare into her eye’s orb, the tears stream down her cheek almost went unnoticed. You were startle by her sobbing tears that you hand subconsciously wipe her tears with your thumb. “Don’t cry Yoona-yah, Aigoo you are big baby girl aren’t you” you smirk while wiping the remaining tears of comfort.

Cleaning up the dishes as you go, you are flabbergasted that you had to tuck Sullyoon to bed. “Sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite” she lightly punches you on the shoulder for treating her like a kid. Well in fact that’s how you view her, a kid who was thrown into society to meet its standard. Well, you once being one of those kids and you don’t want youngsters to suffer the insufferable. Before you turn back, you heard her mutter something. “Do you say something?” you questioned but she only shakes her head. You bid her good night and went straight to the exit.

As the sound of the dorm’s door being locked on the outside, Sullyoon’s heart was racing millions of miles an hour. She whispers to herself something she wished you had heard “Oppa, you paboya (idiot)…………Saranghae (I love you)”.

--------------------------------------

You take a deep breath to awaken your senses back. You thought that was a good way to end your day, but you nearly forget about the other members. Your stay with Sullyoon went a bit too late. So, you hoped that you when you arrived at the radio station, they wouldn’t be questioning your delayed arrival. Without wasting any more time, you drive back to the radio station to pick up the girls.

“ Yahhh Oppa, why are you late?” Bae being the first out of the station is asking you sulkily. You pick your own ears to check if it’s still intact due to her loud voice, Bae’s voice being the most obnoxious one neglected the fact that you almost thought she’s the most normal one out of the six member. But you grow to accept her later on. You decided to ignore her completely and open the door for other members as they walk past her.

With everyone on board, you stroll away down under the night sky of Seoul. “Oppa, why did you pick us up so late?” you sigh in defeat as another one asking you the same question, Haewon peaking her head from her seat. But this time, you answer them as it will only make it even more shady if you stayed silent “I had ramyeon before I left Sullyoon before picking you guys up”. Your anxious mind already predicts the subsequent question after you answered, so you gulp your saliva and willingly admit your fate. “Ouh getting TMI (too much information) from oppa, I was expecting you to say the medical check-up was taking too long.” Haewon said, her voice trails with disbelief . Kyujin follow up with an unexpected question “So you did have ramyeon with Sullyoon?”. The two witty member’s comments had everyone bursting into laughter upon catching you in the act.

Your face went bright red getting fully exposed by the members. You wouldn’t have a calmly ride back to their dorm. You sensed that there’s something going on among the members like a gossip talk among them. You would like to give it more though, but you already fed up with the amount of catastrophe you had to put up today. But your guts unable to detect the fact that there’s a rivalry between who will get your heart, you did not notice Bae being the only one who’s not amused by Kyujin and Haewon act on you as she is saddened by a new revelation about you and Sullyoon.

With everyone going back to their respective resting nest, finally it’s your turn to went back home. Since tomorrow is Nmixx day off, that’s also means your time to compensate lack of sleep on the weekdays. As soon as you step inside your apartment, you waste no time slamming face first into your bed. The bed quickly sucks up your tired body and off to slumber world you go.

The sound of your phone ringing for hours forcing you to wake up. As you squint your eyes to see who’s the caller, it shows on the dialer “Manager-Unnie”. You mutter to yourself “Who the heck would call someone this early”. “Yahhhhh! Y/N -shii, don’t you get my message? Why aren’t you here yet?” and immediately she hungs up the calls. You are puzzled by the unexpected morning scenario, but as soon as you see your phone messenger app was filled with half a thousand unread messages. You are still unaware that one tap of a button to the messenger app would turn your life around completely.

The app was opened, and you still haven’t grasped on what’s going on, you thought maybe just a scammer getting your phone number and spam the heck out of you, you wouldn’t make a deal out of it. You went to Manager-Unnie contact list to check her message. The first message was not a greeting but a news headline link. You starting to feel uncomfortable seeing the link has disturbing wording especially it’s spelling out the group you are taking care of. Adding more horror to you, the picture blurred somewhat showing familiarity about the recent place you have been yesterday.

You tapped on the link, it leads you to Naver News website, as the website starting load its content. Your eyes went wide upon seeing the big red headline saying “NMIXX Male Manager Hurts NMIXX’Fan who’s A Reporter”. Just by reading the main headline, you went to your browser app and see the news feed are filled with your entitled name, “NMIXX Manager” across the screen. You make a call to manager-unnie to analyse the situation. “Palli wah (quick), it would be easier if we discussed this back at the office” She hanged up on you again.

You are frustrated to death waking up into this hell hole, you just want to suffocate yourself with your pillow. Throw you pillow aside, you stared into your ceiling, steadily digesting the uproar you had woken up to. Soon, your breath becoming more stable, and you went to your bathroom to fully wake you up with a splash of cold water shivering your senses to wake. A swig of water cleansing your through, comb your hair to look presentable, donning your jacket and you are ready to face the media allegation.

With van key in hand, you are set to go but you make a quick stop at Ahjussi’s store. “Isn’t today your day off?’ Ahjussi question and pause his daily sweep down the street. “Got an emergency matter to deal with” Ahjussi bid you safe trip before you heading straight to the company.

Cutting to the chase, you are currently running through the company’s corridor making a beeline for the company meeting room. You almost slipped trying to grab a hold of the room door handle. Your stomach immediately sucked in upon everyone arrival making the tension atmosphere tighten. Expressionless and poker face were the only option for whoever enter this room. All higher up who are under Nmixx management are there too including the members, but you don’t spot Sullyoon anywhere. Maybe she went to the bathroom. You tried to squeeze in to take a seat vacant near the girls and whisper to them about Sullyoon whereabout. “She back at the dorm recovering” manager-unnie respond coldly, not even staring at your way.

You felt like you are missing a memo. Surely, it’s just some misleading article. Just pay the whoever posted the article to take it down, right? Thud! You are jolted by the loud hitting sound at the far side of the room and only having you swallowing your saliva upon acknowledging the presence of the CEO himself. The sound of him flaring his nostrils only making you tremble down to the core and unexpectedly he slides a tablet down the tabletop straight to you. The tablet almost slides off, but you managed to catch it. The CEO recognized how clueless you are upon entering the room, not well informed how serious this issue is.

You tried to be friendly by smiling and nodding at the CEO that you will go ahead look what the tablet screen shows. You saw the familiar headline back at your apartment but as you scrolled more into the article, more dread enveloping your skin. The details of what you missed what got you quivering your legs. You were bewildered by how freaking clever they twist the narrative just from a clip that didn’t do you justice. They only add the part of the clip where grab a hold onto the reporter’s wrist.

That bastard reported makes up stories about how you push the reporter away a bit too harsh. He has the audacity to post his injury on the internet to make him the victim. The video cut making a villain impression of you portraying as a villain, saying unnecessary usage of hard force to push away fans and reporter, even there is a picture of you last night with Sullyoon getting medical check-up and adding description that you hurt the idol and make it seem like you try to silent the idol from voicing out their assault by giving them a treatment. They were never assaulted in the first place, now they put their attack and pinpoint it to you.

You voice out your opinion about this absurdity of the situation it is “Sajang-nim (CEO) this is all just altered stories making me look bad, I have never raised my hand on Nmixx member ever, and I- “. You were cut short as you the CEO interrupts you with a question “How did Sullyoon get hurt initially?” his clasped hand covering his face partially investigating you. You carry on explicate what happened beginning with everything going according to the schedule up until the period where it all happened, after the interview. You said Sullyoon was heading towards the van, but a random reporter grabs her wrist cruelly, so you had to interfere as you saw her getting hurt by the reporter.

You were sceptical, you thought you did great explain yourself to them, but you hear everyone in the room murmuring with each other. “Is that all?” question proposed by the CEO got you feeling agonizing, as he stands up from his seat and make his way to you, you tried to look as confident as possible not being hitched by his demeanour. “I’m opened for any possibility, even I would believe there’s an alien attending the interview yesterday. But…….” The CEO gave his insight on this matter, accumulating to your distress there’s a brief interval before he finished his sentence. “If there’s no evidence, there’s no persuasion” The CEO utter his last word.

You were taken aback by the unexpected turn of event. “Ouh Come on Sajang-nim, you guys just going to believe that bullshit of an article” you sound with clear hearing of everyone in the room. You turn to the members “You girls know me, right? We have been together ever since”, you know it very well that the members know you are innocence but seeing their horrified face only proving how powerless they are even if they spoke out the truth, the media had overpowered the truth once again.

You attempt to seek help from the occupants maybe there’s hope among the darkness “Hey, we can fix this together, we got thi-”. You look back to the sound of opening door, you saw a group of people with a dark blue uniform. One of the guys walk up to you with a handcuff “Mr, you are under arrest for assault. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law” prosecuting you by handcuffing both of your hands.

“Sajang-nim! hey Sajang-nim! what are you doing? Is this some sort of prank? Get off me! I’m not finished talking to the CEO” you squirm left and right unable to come to terms with reality as the policemen drag you out of the company’s building. You are then met with million flashes of camera shutter from dozens of reporters from difference mainstream news agency and plethora of mic shoved in front of you. “Did you hurt Nmixx member?”, “What grudge do you hold onto them?”, “Is it related to Jinni leaving”. Avoidance of camera shutter and mic was the only thing you do up until you step inside at the back seat of a cop car. From that point on, the future looks bleak.

Back at Nmixx dormitory, Sullyoon just woke up from her heart fluttering dream of you. She took it as a sign of good weekend, maybe she could even get you to spend time with her. But soon, her initial thought was replacing with questionable silent atmosphere of their dorm. She wonders where everyone went. Did they go to get grocery? She investigates every room, but no one was there. She went back to the living room and detect the sound of doors opening. She doesn’t suspect anything and saw her members returned from somewhere she isn’t aware off.

As she inspects closer to her member and grasp a situation from what it seems to be the members just arrived from a crime scene. Some have dark spot under their eyes, some have tears spot visible. She inquired about what happened this morning. Upon hearing the news, she thought her aching sharp pain on her wrist is the most painful experienced but that turns out to false after what she just heard from the members. Just a mere thought of not being able to see you again shattered her heart to million pieces. Tears starting to shed to thousands off her eyes. She would gladly trade her arm to be able to see you again.

She couldn’t had imagined she would wake up into this nightmare. She slams her affected wrist hard into the ground hoping to wake up from this unbearable nightmare but it only making her wheeping in pain and mourn over your disappearance even more. A total horror shot down upon their members faces as they immediately went towards Sullyoon to stop her from hurting herself. They couldn’t stand anymore seeing their loved ones getting hurt after losing you and couldn’t be possible be her next.

--------------------------------------

It’s been weeks since the article explode, with Nmixx’s manager arrest and their activity was halted after the controversy. And here you stand in the middle of your cell, staring out into the small opening separating you and the outside world. You would be lying if you couldn’t be any better since your arrest. Honestly, it turns out going a lot better than you expected. No need to deal with early traffic, countless paperwork signage, eyes blinded by paparazzi, and…...even free from controversy.

Life’s great in here but there’s lingering void in your heart that you are longing for, the feeling of loving someone, your little sister and the members that you leaved unintended. They are the only thing that you have left, Jiu; your little sister, Haewon, Kyujin, Jiwoo, Lily, Bae and your dearest Sullyoon. By now, you had truly accept your feelings for her, there’s no faking it anymore. *Bang-Bang-Bang- “Wake up sleepy head……you are free now” You are about to scream with anger when the guards interrupt your daydreaming, but the latter comment got you perplex.

No news, no message, not even a pigeon letter informing you about your released. With your former outfit on, the one clothing before you were dragged to jail. You stand cluelessly outside of the prison gate with no goal in mind. You thought of going back inside with now that you don’t have anywhere to go. On the verge of making the decision, you heard a honking noice. “Hey kid, need a ride?” that one pervy ahjussi from the convenience store is here to fetch you after your discharged.

While you and ahjussi strolled down the highway in his muscle car, you end the silence by inquiring him about your release. Ahjussi simply hand you his phone with an article already opened on the screen. “NMIXX’s Manager Was Never It, It Was The Reporter” you read the title word by word, not repeating the same mistake again like how you act cocky towards the CEO for missing the detail about the whole issue. Just right below the title, a display of a video playing a clip.

The clip basically displays how the incident played out from a different perspective. The video capture from the initial grab of Sullyoon wrist with a clear sign of the reporter pulling her wrist forcefully, up until the second you popped into frame interfering the scene showcasing the need of rough grab onto the reporter’s wrist. “Heheeheh, took them long enough to post the video” you let out a feeble laugh on how ridiculous that you shouldn’t have to serve your time in prison if this video went viral, but your realistic mindset brings you back with optimism. “It must be tough mentally for the user who recorded this to post the video” you mutter to yourself.

On top of that, there’s another clip that catches your attention as the thumbnail used was clearly shows Sullyoon’s face. As you tap onto the video, you’re in for a treat as the seconds progressing through the video. Your heart softens and turns into fragile glass witnessing the content displaying Sullyoon speaking the truth to the media.

It was clearly shown it was her own initiative knowing the low-quality recording. “Our manager-oppa actually……...he was never the one that was portrayed on the article. Ever since our debut, he always there for us through thick and thin. He can be selfless at times and still got his insecurity about taking care of people, but he is putting his effort at best……...” she proceeded to explain her whole side of the story supposedly being the most affected victim out of this tragedy. Until reaching the moment where you and she went to the hospital to seek medical attention to treat the injury origin from the earlier event. Adding more sorrowful setting in the video, it was self-evident that Sullyoon was stifling her tears wallowing the past for the sake shedding the truth to the world.

For the first time Sullyoon referring you as Oppa was one thing to think about. Her comforting words heals your self-doubting capabilities of managing them was another. The video’s sound cut off suddenly, marking the end of the video. You rub out your eyes to dry out the tears. “Have you got any place to visit?” he probed you for answers. You choose to visit your little sister, Jiu.

Jiu, being one of those people that you are truly cherishes. But unfortunately, she got chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS). You aren’t an intellectual in diseases but after reading a few articles of it. You are only saddened by it fully understand how unfortunate Jiu’s condition is. Here is the analogy, normally you’re tired, you take a rest, you got better but for these patients they get tired, they take a rest, and they are still tired. Most hurting part about it, Jiu’s smile will always be carved on her face whenever you visited her.

The journey to the hospital where your sister hospitalised was quiet, with you sitting silently contemplating your current situation. The pervy ahjussi was only a nickname for him from the first impression of him. When you first moved into your current apartment now, as you open the door, the sight of him ducking with a bra attached to his face makes a terror out of you. It was a pain in the arse for him to explain himself, but it got solved soon later. Apparently, he was the landlord wanting to check the water pump to your apartment but still that doesn’t explain the bra part.

Soon after knowing him even more, he doesn’t appear to be of what your first impression thinks of him. Yes, he’s the one been there for you at your lowest, betrayed by your fake friends, the genuine one taking his own way to the after world, news of your sister had to be transferred to another hospital due to the lack of service of the former hospital as your sister illness getting more severe. Everything went downhill for that whole week.

It was raining that day; you embrace the coldness of rainwater soaking you in waiting hypothermia to put a full stop of your life voyage. It all change when the drunk ahjussi throwing tantrum you to drink with him because he needs a drinking buddy. You got more confused at a drunk a person taking walk outside in the rain, being drunk should be enough reason to. Entering a new day, you regret drinking with ahjussi as you got a massive hangover. Both of you went to their respective toilet bowl and a sink to ease up the hangover. Who would have known a middle-aged man acting childish to annoy you would extend your lifeline.

Reminiscing the past got you company for the whole car ride. Upon arriving, you inform the receptionist about your presence before strolling down to her room. You asked ahjussi beforehand to stop by a store to buy some flowers and her favourite snack, tteokbokki.

As you look through the glass door of her room, you spot a figure that’s not matching with any of your possible ideas. Wears a black hoodie with a black cap on. Doesn’t look like a nurse here. You don’t remember having an extra sibling or relative. Is it Jiu’s friends? She never tells you about them, maybe she a got a new one during your time in prison? You set the final thought as the possible answer. But you are opened for any possibilities as you heighten your alertness as there’s couldn’t be possible, she got herself a boyfriends

You slide the door opened, attracting all occupant’s attention to you. As Jiu’s eyes set to you, she waved cheerly to you transitioning your facial expression from serious to friendly. Jiu was informed earlier about your visit by the nurse through Ahjussi contact. You saw the mysterious figure turn his face to see whom Jiu’s waving to, but he quickly turns back. You catch a glimpse of his side profile but can’t construct an image who might this be.

“Who is this Jiu-yah?” you inquire Jiu while you cautiously glance at the unknown man’s face, but the man keeps averting his face from you. “She’s been visiting me while you were serving time” you look at Jiu with question mark planted on your face. “She?’ you wide eyed you sister and emphasized the word pronunciation intricately upon this new disclosure. “Yoona-yah, don’t be shy, this is my brother” Jiu nudge Sullyoon’s shoulder a bit gesturing her to face you properly.

“Anyeonghaseyo manager-nim” Sullyoon lightly bow in courtesy and weakly smiled at you after she pulls down her hoodie. You got millions of questions running in your heads upon seeing Sullyoon visiting your sister

After a solid hour of connecting the dots, finally everyone is on the same page. Clearly during your imprisonment, Sullyoon decided to visit your sister as she feels like it’s a right thing to do. You are not the only one having guilt rotting you alive, Sullyoon also felt the same way towards your sister especially, having your loved one wrongly accuse because one’s unable to do anything in their power to save them. With the help of manager-unnie, she could track where your sister hospitalised.

Ever since then, Sullyoon and Jiu were so in tune together, even if it’s only a couple of visits but every meeting mends her heart as she expressed out to Jiu like you were in front of her. While Nmixx schedule suspended and everyone were so stressed handling the issue, Sullyoon able to find tranquillity in the midst of this controversy by visiting Jiu in her free time. Every time Sullyoon visit your sister, she talks a lot about you, in which you aren’t conscious about. Jiu has a knack for digging through people emotion, mind controlling everyone to spill a little too much information. She kind of have a plan as she heard you are going to visit her at the same time with Sullyoon

“Oppa, what are you going to do now? you’re free” Jiu raise a question to you, unconsciously waking you up from staring a little too much to Sullyoon, hitting you back to reality now that you are yet again starting from zero. Sullyoon look at you with anticipation expecting an answer that align with what she hoped for. “I’m not too sure, probably check on Ahjussi about any job vacancy at his convenience store” you respond naively, earning a jab at your torso from Jiu. “What was that for?” you rub the area of Jiu’s jab quite shock by her random attack. “Just because” Jiu half-heartedly displays her fake smile with a scowling amber seeing your air-headed mindset. “Yoona-yah, you guys got a new manager?” Sullyoon shake head in denial.

In front of Jiu, presented two people who are unaware of their mutual affection. Jiu’s trying to play cupid with you two but the way you react mindlessly to the question earlier, makes her sighing with hopeless. “Alright then, I need to go to the toilet, so I don’t think I need to see you guys off, Is that alright?” Jiu clap her hand indicating you and Sullyoon can leave. She hopes that you guys can work this off on your own.

As the three of you walk out, “Bye guys” Jiu bid off cutely before turning around going the opposite way to the toilet. With both you and Sullyoon left alone, awkward atmosphere ensued. In your head, you amused how drastically energetic Jiu had been, you fully understand her condition as one can’t possibly exert themselves to much or they will be drained easily. Truthfully, having Sullyoon giving her occasional visit is good for her recovery in terms of emotional scale. Sullyoon on the other hand went haywire. She never thought she would see you this early after your imprisonment. Maybe at least she expected you to be freed from the charges but not this early after an anonymous video was uploaded online in which it clear out all of the injustice that had happened.

“Has your wrist fully healed yet?” your sudden question diverts her consciousness back, instantly making eye contact with you. You already know the answer as she’s now not constrained to a sling anymore, but you want to hear her soothing voice reply as it would put you more at ease. “It’s been only a week after I removed my sling, so far I can move my wrist around, even the bruise patch is gone” she showed you her wrist that’s been fully recovered returning her fair white skin.

Soon enough, both of you walk together mindlessly, cherishing each other company but reluctant to initiate a conversation. You look around you, empty and tranquil space of open-air area of the hospital encourage you to engage in a small talk with her. “How’s the members doing back at the dorm?” both of you converse with each other at a gentle pace, enjoying the moment. She calmly replies to you stating that the girls recover far better than expected after the incident. She goes on how the members cope with criticism and pressure from the media, reappearance of false accusation of the members kicking Jinni out of the group. There is some instances where Jiwoo was too scared to even go out of her room, locking herself up and many more countless nights crying, exhausting mentally by the insults and isolating themselves from the outside world. You regain solace again knowing the company doing their job rehabilitate the girls. Unluckily, you didn’t ask how she cope her problem considering she had cried countless night missing you so much.

“……. It was really a rough week, but I really wished someone was there to lend their shoulder when we are at our lowest” Sullyoon’s eyes are on you, she tries to push her luck to gauge your response, hoping it relates to you reuniting with the group again……. reuniting with her. You take a nervous deep breath, pretending to ignore her indirect comment towards you. You would be lying that you wouldn’t want to reconcile with them. In the matter of fact, you want to, you need to, but after listening of what the girls had gone through, you can’t fathom at the assumption of you retaking the position as their manager again without a promise that their safety is guaranteed. You done hurting people like how you have hurt your parent heart for being incompetent. Before you know it, nature had taken their lives before you can ask them for forgiveness.

You were so in dazed with your thought that you didn’t notice Sullyoon stop her track. As you feel an empty space right beside you, you look over your shoulder and see Sullyoon looking at you with a sulk as if she’s saying you are ignoring her. You grin, reliving the image of Sullyoon that you used to love but it’s time to let her go. You walk back to her in gentle pace. And as you stand in front of her, you patted her head and say “Yoona-yah………it’s okay, you can take care of yourself now”.

--------------------------------------

5 years after.

“Sullyoon-sunbaenim (senior), how did you guy able to break the 7-year curse? and still maintained as a 6-membered group, and what makes you guys want to renew your contract?” Sullyoon lightly chuckle, seeing her junior getting nudge by her co-partner for asking to many questions in a single sentence. “Well actually, it’s a long story so I hope I can make you guys understand in a brief explanation…….”. She promptly continues her speech act stating the group secret overcoming the curse which is deep understanding to one another. Deep bond comes from extensive communication among the members, they would bicker over little things but communicate through small misunderstanding built into big network of empathy to each other. Additional point, the group made noteworthy changes after the big conflict 5 years ago, Truly reinforced their capability to strive for the future. She ends her answer with a small bow.

Under the span of 5 years, a lot of unforgettable achievements accomplish by Nmixx. For instance, winning an award as The Song of the Year categories under The Mnet Asian Music Awards (MAMA) on their latest comeback and success continues with reaching new audience at the Billboard Music Awards and was proposed as one in the Top Duo/Group category. Focusing on more individual member, every member had done their solo debut. Presenting each respective member’s distinct colour including Sullyoon. Today marking her first solo comeback attaining her first win on Music Bank Show.

“Sullyoon-shii, after this magazine photoshoot, we will end with a fan sign event” Her private manager informed her for the upcoming schedule. She hummed in respond before he leaves her alone in the dressing room. She takes a quick moment looking at herself in the mirror tracing back of fond memories up until now. Ever since then, Sullyoon developed into more confident and independent women then she is. Her dedicated fan would discover that she’s becoming more charming than ever contrasting from her old wary and shy behaviour.

She got a call from her stone-cold manager “Sullyoon-shii, are you still in the dressing room? We need to move to the photoshoot set”. Sullyoon answer coldly before packing up her purse and finish her last two schedule. However, even if she did turn for the better, she prefers her old self, composed and reserved demeanour. In her member’s eyes, she’s still Sullyoon who opted to stay indoors and play games all day. Her on-stage and off-stage aura was so difference to the point where the members joke about her being another whole new person when she’s on-stage.

After the recovery of the tragedy 5 years ago, manager-unnie was appointed as the main manager and got them a new assistant to aid her side. The new assistant who is now her temporary private manager is supervising her schedule strictly and professionally. Sullyoon only had one last schedule to go through. “Huhhhhhhh, when will this end? I just want to go back home and sleep” Sullyoon whined in frustration leaning on her right shoulder on top of the vanity table. With eyes closed, she breath steadily trying to regain her composure after 10 hours schedule with barely any breaks.

As she opens her eyes, she sees her left wrist recalling her past memories. She sorts of wished that there’s more significant trace to preserve her memories of you. The only remembrance she had of you is her unforgettable wrist pain still fresh in her mind till this day. A ringing sound from across the room got her senses heightened, breaking her out of her mental imagery. She stands up slouching to get the phone call from her purse thrown to the opposite side of the room as she enters the room earlier in annoyance of her pack time schedule.

She takes out her phone and see the screen display the dialler’s name “Manager-unnie”. She takes the call calmly “Anyeong, what is it Unnie?”. “Ouh Yoona-yah, there’s some adjustment with manager time shift, it looks like my assistant had to went back to take care of other group itineraries, don’t worry we already got you covered on manager replacement, there will be a new manager on your way to take care of you starting today, Okay”. Before she can respond, manager-unnie hung up on her before she could ask for her new manager’s name. She sighs in disappointment but quickly regain her emotion at a thought of tricking the new manager to skip the last schedule so she can head straight back home early.

A knocking sound of the dressing room’s door can be heard signaling the new manager has arrived, “Wait for a moment” Sullyoon rapidly pack up her belongings to execute her plan. She maybe got a little too carried away of how thrilled this is going to work, taking advantage of newcomer for her own benefit. With her belongings in hand, she scrambles away towards the door. As she’s about to reach the doorknob, the door swings open hitting her in the face.

She lands butt first on the floor, making her flinch in pain “Ouch, can’t you wait outside instead”. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you” the familiarity of the voice got her nerves sending shivers throughout her body. She looks up towards the source of the voice, as her eye regaining its focus. You take her hand in yours helping her to stand up. Sullyoon gasped in shocked upon recognizing the figure she misses the most. “Y/N oppa?”.

-The end-

#seol yoona #kpop fanfic #kpop gg #sullyoon x male reader #nmixx sullyoon x male reader #fluff #nmixx #sullyoon x male oc #sullyoon fluff #nmixx sullyoon fluff #nmixx sullyoon #nmixx sullyoon x male oc #kpopfluff #nmixx fluff #kpop manager #idol manager

239 notes · View notes

gretavanmoon · 6 months ago

Text

The Proposition (S17)

Spinning Now: "Birthday Sex" by Jeremih (2009)

Pairing: Danny x female reader

Word Count: 14.3k

Description: Danny's always been that friend and roommate who you never thought of as anything more, until a birthday proposition presents itself in a way that neither of you can deny.

Warnings: Drinking, Cursing, Heavy Flirting, Praise, Dirty Talk, Touching, Wax Play

Smut: Kissing, Oral M!Receiving, Oral F!Receiving, Fingering, Unprotected Sex (use protection!!)

+ This little diddly of an idea has been swimming around in my head for months now, and I've been so excited to get it going. And thanks to the reader who suggested it be a roomies trope ;) Hope ya like xoxo

Girl you know i i i...

HER POV

White or red?

There is no special occasion, simply just the bi-weekly dinner gathering of your friend group that has turned into an every-Thursday-night habit. Not that an occasion constitutes your wine choice, but still yet, the thought quickly crosses your mind. You are all meeting at your and Danny’s house tonight, along with the conjoined group of friends that has been steadily keeping each other fed for the past two and a half years, now.

You’d been living with Danny for as long as you could remember, taking claim of his spare room sometime after everyone collectively moved out of your parents’ homes. The arrangement worked perfectly, the two of you already knowing how the other ticked after being friends for many years. Your jobs kept both of you busy, giving the other enough room that you didn’t feel like you were invading space in the small house.

You pull your phone from your pocket as you peruse the wine selections, texting the group chat to check on tonight’s menu.

You: What are we making tonight again? I already forgot

Jake: Salmon and quinoa and some other stuff

Jake: God your memory sucks

You: Emma, come get your man he’s being mean to me again

Emma: Quit picking on her babe

You: Ok so I should get white wine, right? Pairs with fish?

Sam: Just get three fuckin bottles of wine, who cares

You: Ok I’m not coming if you guys are gonna continue to harass me

Sam: Too bad it’s your house and you have to be there anyway

You: I’ll lock myself in my room I don’t care

Danny: No Y/N, if they’re gonna be assholes they don’t have to come over. They can stay home and we can order pizza :)

Jake: Shut the fuck up Sam, I’m making the damned salmon and quinoa

Josh: What the fuck is quinoa

You shove your phone back in your pocket as you roll your eyes, the buzzing still consistent as you imagine they are still arguing with one another.

It's funny how much Danny has been defending you lately. He’s still his normal self, your very good friend who sometimes lets his sweet side get the better of him, but in the past couple of months, something has switched. The more the brothers pick on you, the more he stands up for you. It used to be the opposite, with him joining in on your playful dog-piling any chance he could get. But ever since a couple of months ago… ever since his last birthday…

Almost three years ago now, you and Danny had found yourselves wrapped up in each other’s arms in his bed after a drunken night that started out like any other, dinner, socializing, cards, and way too much to drink. It was his birthday party, and after everyone else had cleared out, you stayed up to clean up the multitude of plastic cups and empty bottles that were scattered around the house. You were both fairly drunk, and you knew if you got the majority of the party cleaned up that night, you wouldn’t have to bother with it all while being inevitably hungover the next morning.

“I’ll get out of your hair soon, Danny. I’m about to call an Uber to go stay with Emma.” You’d said as you dried the last of the dishes. He was sprawled out over on the loveseat, his shirt halfway unbuttoned and his mess of curls pulled up on top of his head. You’d always found him attractive, but you’d always been positive he was way out of your league. He’d never even given you a passing glance in that way. Except, that night, he looked exceptionally delicious… and your hazy, drunken mind undoubtedly had started to drift.

“What? Whyyyyy…? Don’t get an Uber, it’s too late,” he’d slurred as you walked over to sit on the ottoman his feet were rested on.

“Becauseeee… it’s your birthday and I don’t want to interrupt your time with whatever guest you might have coming over.” You remember the words felt heavy in your mouth, like it was strange that you had never talked about Danny’s personal life out loud before. Or yours, for that matter. Even after all the years of being friends and roommates, the two of you had always taken things as they’d come… watching as strangers made their way in and out of your bedrooms without a second question.

“Guest?” His face contorted. “I ‘ont have a guest coming over, Y/N…”

You’d let your mouth gape open and your hand clutch your chest in a display of over-dramatics. “Really? No one to give you a happy ending on your birthday?! You must be falling off the wagon, Wagner.”

What you do remember, though, was how hard he laughed at your half-assed attempt at a shitty joke.

“I swear! Just me, tonight.” It was at that very second that you remember becoming enamored with the way he licked his lips, how he clicked his tongue just a little, and how his eyes had fluttered closed under his lashes. He’d reached his hand out for you to grab, so you did.

“You gonna let me be lonely on my birthday, Y/N?” His warm fingers slowly worked their way to interlace with yours. This flirtatious tone wasn’t something you’d ever seen from him before, but for some reason, you found yourself tumbling for it. The deep rasp in his voice signaled something else, something so unexpected from him that you almost laughed it off as him kidding with you.

Your eyes had glanced around the room in confusion, and when you didn’t answer, you felt his foot kick into your leg, bringing your eyes back to look at him. His eyebrow was cocked in the air, as if he was waiting for an answer.

“You’re drunk, Danny… you don’t…” you’d anxiously answered, nodding your head side to side in disbelief.

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t want me to… stay…” for some reason, he was making you nervous, and you were having trouble answering him. There was no way he wanted you to stay, of all people. No way in hell.

He’d laughed, sitting up on the couch and leaning over to take you in his arms in a giant bear hug. His face was buried into your shoulder, pulling you close in the warmest embrace you’d had in a while. It was strange feeling him this closely, and you shivered a little at his touch. You’d hugged him back, and then felt his lips drift close to your ear.

“I actually do… want you to stay here with me. In my room, in my bed, until tomorrow morning…” his voice crackled in your ear, the faint scent of spicy tequila still on his breath. It’d sent chills all over your body, and you had to admit, it was a strangely welcome feeling. Danny had never been this close to you, like this, ever before. His words had shocked your system, though, temporarily deeming you unable to respond.

So when he finally pulled back from the hug and confidently met your eyes again, you let yourself go with it. You were still fairly intoxicated, but this drop dead gorgeous friend of yours who had hardly ever given you the time of day was now throwing himself into your lap. Why turn him down? It was his birthday, after all.

“I never knew you were into me, Danny,” you’d cooed, watching as his fingers drifted across the back of your hand.

He sat back and dropped his head against the cushion again, cracking his fingers above his head. “I‘ve always been into you, Y/N. You’re gorgeous and fun, make me laugh… always been so good to me.”

You’d never admitted it, but of course you had pictured yourself with him a time or two. How could you not? Talented, handsome, kind and genuine…always looking for fun and always including you in his outlandish plans. But this…him laying it out on the line like this? It had your body beginning to physically yearn for him, completely out of nowhere.

“Stop playing, no you haven’t…” you’d argued, still in disbelief.

He held his hands up in surrender, cocking a sideways smile. “I swear. I just… never had the guts to say anything…”

You contemplated it all for a second, giving him a questioning look that begged for his reassurance.

“Why not, ya know? Not like we’re strangers…” you’d muttered through a sharp inhale.

You stood from the ottoman and slowly began stepping one foot in front of the other toward him, standing just between his legs. Your heart rate spiked as you answered him, your face flushing with the reality of what you were about to do. “Just a birthday hookup, huh? Just this one time?”

You let your hand brush against his thigh, your fingers lightly tickling until they reached his hip. It felt as though your hands were disconnected from your body, making their own decision to reach out and touch him as he sat reclined in front of you. Gently, his hands pulled around your waist, his thumbs digging into the flesh, strong and inviting.

“Just this one time…and that’s it.”

That night, the two of you stayed up until the winter sun was striking through the windows onto Danny’s white down comforter, and only then did the two of you finally drift off to a short but sweet slumber, until the alarm on his phone woke you both in a panic.

You’d fallen asleep upside-down on the bed, both of your heads at the foot of his king-size. His arm was draped across the small of your back, and his hair was still a messy bundle of curls at the back of his head.

“Fuck,” he’d muttered, rubbing his eyes. “What time is it?”

“I don’t fuckin’ know, it’s your alarm…”

Suddenly, now, in the light of day and the brightness of the room, the both of you became very conscious of your unclothed selves. You’d felt your cheeks blush at the sight of him, skin still dewy with the after-effects of sweat and sex. You didn’t miss his passing glance of you, too, still halfway wrapped up in his sheets as he maneuvered to the top of the bed to check the time.

“‘S only seven. Shit, I’ve got a headache…” he said, running a hand over his face.

“Me too,” you mumbled as he laid back down beside you. You pulled the covers up a bit more over your body, feeling extremely exposed in the bright sunlight. He propped himself up on his elbows, giving you a sweet and questioning look. “So, what are we supposed to do now?” you’d asked. “Cuddle?”

His laugh bounced off the walls, the glitter in his eye sending a wave of nerves through your body.

“We cuddled plenty last night, Y/N. We didn’t end up falling asleep until like, six,” he said, his voice groggy with sleep, or lack thereof.

“Fuck,” you breathed. “I’m sorry for keeping you up all night, I know you have things to do all day–” he cut you off with a kiss, his neck craning down to meet your lips with the sweetest surprise touch.

After a few fleeting seconds he pulled away, meeting your eyes as he spoke again. “Don’t you dare apologize to me, Y/N. I asked you to stay in here. Asked you to keep me company on my birthday.” His hand reached up to pull the hair away from your cheek, bringing instant flashbacks of his hands on your face and shoulders last night as he pinned you down, fucking you into his mattress. “I was just completely unaware that both of us would last for that many hours…” he laughed, rolling away to cover his face.

“God, Danny, don’t embarrass me!” you laughed along with him.

“What is there to be embarrassed about?! Shit, I think we were great together,” he went on, holding his hand out for you to low-five.

You pursed your lips together, letting your hand clap onto his. “We were, weren’t we? Never would have thought.”

“Shit, I thought about it all the time…” he admitted.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?” you played, smacking him across the chest.

“I don’t know, you’re just a girl in my friend group, ya know? My roommate that helps me with rent…didn’t want to freak you out or something and make you hate me,” he explained.

You propped up on your elbow, shaking your head at him. “So we could have been doing this all along?”

“Oh, so you enjoyed yourself, then?” he countered, rolling you to lie on your back as he pulled himself over you again.

As you gazed up at him above you, small curly strands falling around his face and onto yours, you felt your face get hot, the same need you felt in your stomach for him last night coming back full force. A need you never thought you would have for him. A need that came back to you over and over again the night before, and left you both too exhausted to even bother to see the morning.

“Danny, we fucked like five times, of course I enjoyed myself,” you tried to keep the confidence heavy in your voice.

His nose scrunched up as he giggled, light and airy into the room. He laced his fingers with yours, lifting your hands together into the air and pulling them back down between you again. This time, you took the initiative and kissed him again, straining to keep things from moving as quickly as they had moved once you finally climbed into his lap on the couch last night.

When you finally separated, both of you refraining from letting it go any further, he disconnected your hands and clenched his jaw. “What do we do now?”

You didn’t want a relationship. And neither did he. That much was very known amongst your friend group, the both of you way too busy with your own lives to devote your time to another. You stood strong in that decision, and you knew for a fact that he would, too. So your mind began wandering, thinking of ways to end this entanglement you’d found yourselves in.

“What if we just… did this sometimes?” you proposed.

His brow furrowed. “I’m listening…”

“Our birthdays. Yours in December, and mine in June… it’s perfect. If the both of us are single on our birthday each year, we make a plan to not leave the other lonely…” The idea seemed preposterous, but at the same time, it didn't. A sure-fire way to make each of your birthdays interesting each year, and after the night you’d shared last night, you’re positive he wouldn’t turn the idea down.

His eyes dashed around the room as he considered it, taking a deep breath as he sat up in the bed. You caught a glance of his naked lower half, and your eyes rolled back on their own accord as you pictured his hips pounding into yours last night in the darkness of his bedroom. You sat up too, challenging his gaze.

He held his hand out again, this time for you to shake.

“Deal.”

—-

After deciding on the three bottles of wine, two white and a red, your mind begins wandering off by itself, causing you to hardly pay attention to the fact that you are singing the words to the song playing in your headphones out loud. You bite your lips, glancing around to see if anyone had seen you, or worse, heard your horribly flat singing voice. Luckily the aisle is clear, so you make a mad dash for the checkout line, ready to get out and head back home for dinner.

The drive is short, and when you finally arrive in the driveway, you find that you’re the last one to get there.

“Hello, hello,” you sing as you let yourself inside, kicking off your flip flops at the door. You set the bag of wine bottles on his island where Jake and Sam are busy preparing the meal.

“Thank god, the booze is here!” you hear Josh sing through the house as he makes his way over to stand beside you, opening the drawer of the island to search for Danny’s wine opener. You set all three bottles in line on the countertop in a nice straight line. “Shiraz, Y/N? That’s surely a bold choice…” Josh says, rolling his eyes.

“The label looked pretty, I don’t know!” you counter, shoving your shoulder into his. “It already smells really good, guys…” you say as you leave Josh to the wine, leaning over Jake’s shoulder as he stirs a pot at the stove. Suddenly Danny is leaning over his other side, sticking his finger in whatever sauce Jake is stirring.

“Aht, aht!” Jake swats his hand away just as Danny sticks his finger into the saucepan. “It’s not perfect yet…”

“Tastes good as hell to me,” Danny says, locking eyes with you as he pops his lips over his finger. You feel your insides churn.

“So Y/N, your birthday is next week, you guys planning your weird little bi-yearly birthday hookup still?” Josh nonchalantly asks as he yanks the cork from the bottle of red. Fortunately, it only took nearly two years for your friends to catch on to your and Danny’s little birthday agreement, when Jake inadvertently tried to surprise Danny with filling up his bathroom with balloons, only to find you bent over the bathroom sink.

“Christ, Josh, you have to put it like that?” Danny intervened. “Geez…”

“What?! That’s what it is, right?” Josh says as he pulls glasses down from the cabinet. You feel your face blush, even though it’s an open topic, at this point.

Danny pulls himself up to sit on the corner of his countertop. “No, we simply enjoy the other’s company on our birthdays because both of us suck at the dating playing field and always decide to indulge in one another’s availability, right Y/N?”

“That’s correct,” you confidently agree as you listen to the others groan.

Josh throws his head back and laughs loudly.

“What?” Danny yelps.

“You don’t think it’s funny that neither of you have ever had a significant other on your birthdays for the past what, three years now?” Josh says, eliciting silent looks of agreement from his brothers.

“Mmm, no, I don’t think it’s funny. We both suck at dating, you heard him. This is just…our way of making sure we aren’t alone twice a year.” The attempt at explaining yourselves is transparent, at this point. You know you’re lying to yourselves. It's obvious. Each and every time you pull yourself from Danny’s bed, or he from yours, you feel your bones begging you to stay. You like him, you’ll admit it, but only to yourself.

Twice a year isn’t enough, it was never enough. And you know for a fact that it will never be enough. On his birthday last year, you could have sworn you heard him say something close to the ‘L’ word as he came for the third time that night, his voice low and whining as you clenched around him, bringing him to his completely fucked-out state of mind. Each hookup had gotten hotter, heavier, and more serious. Each time was better than the last, and this last one was so intense, that you ended up staying in his room a second night, completely breaking your own rules.

As you slipped out of his bedroom that second morning, his honey brown eyes were begging you to stay, his lips touching his fingertips and blowing it your way as you quietly shut his bedroom door behind you.

That morning broke you. That morning your heart told you what it wanted.

That morning was the last time you denied it to yourself– you were absolutely head over heels for him. The yearning you’d felt had begun overtaking your whole self. And it wasn’t just yearning, it was something else. Something more powerful, something you couldn’t grasp the notion of, because you’d never felt it before. It’s now become something that makes your days drag by with the thought of him, not only sexually but personally, too. You feel wrapped up in his life, intertwined with his decisions, and some days you barely even have the time to give each other more than a goodmorning and goodnight. Sure, you still meet up every week with your group for dinner, but the subtle touches and the intense glances that are being shared almost on the daily now have become too much. You want to tell him. You need to tell him.

“Hm. Okay, so… what’s the plan this year?” Josh asks, obviously wanting to pry into your business, just like always.

“Josh, it’s none of your fucking business. Can you leave them alone for a second?” Sam says as he empties the box of rice into the insta-pot.

“No, it’s fine. I have big plans…” Danny bites his cheeks in as he denies himself a cheeky smile, swinging his bare feet as he sits on the counter. His eyes are boring into yours, and you swear just a simple word from him would have you on your knees for him, anymore.

“Big plans, huh?” you try to avoid his stare.

“Mmmmhm…” he says, grinning to himself. “Might have you running away and never coming back, though.”

You nearly choke on the sip of wine swirling in your mouth. Throughout the years, you will admit, your hookups had gotten more and more mischievous as time went on, both of you pushing each other’s boundaries just a little more each time. Nothing had ever gotten too crazy, but after his birthday last year, it was an unwritten understanding that not much was off the table, at all.

Sam plugs his ears with his fingers. “La la la I don’t wanna hear details!”

Jake pulls his wooden spoon from the sauce, turning to face all of you. “I do, I wanna hear it. Keep going. What’s the plan?”

“I’m not fuckin’ tellin’ you guys, it’ll ruin the surprise,” Danny argues as Josh hands him a glass of wine.

“Okay well you can tell me after her birthday then, right?” Jake pushes.

Emma steps in front of him, taking the now dripping spoon from his hand and running her tongue up the side to catch it from going into the floor. “Yeah Danny, maybe you should give him the rundown, maybe it’ll get his wheels turning,” she challenges, bouncing her eyebrows to Jake as she places the spoon back into the sauce. You laugh at her, feeling no embarrassment in the least.

“Get my wheels turning?! What is that supposed to mean?!” Jake yells, grabbing her waist from behind and spinning her around the kitchen.

You lock eyes with Danny again as he gives you a suspicious look of excitement, like he’s trying his hardest to keep his idea locked inside.

—---

After a rambunctious and wine-drunk dinner, everyone begins to file out of the house, stumbling away to either walk down the street to their respective homes, or catching a ride out with other friends to the nearest bar. You’re left behind again, like always, helping Danny with dishes and pouring out the remaining bits of wine left behind in the glasses.

“So, next week. The big 2-5. You still down for hanging out?” he asks as he dries the last dish, as if you would ever say no.

“Actually, I think I’m going to spend this year alone, ya know? Keep it low key, order some take-out and curl up on the couch,” you say with a cheeky tone.

His jaw hangs slack as he nearly drops the towel in his hand. “Really?”

You scoff. “No, Danny. Are you serious? We shook on it, and I don’t break my promises,” you laugh. You slowly walk toward him, the line between friend and more than a friend getting blurrier as time goes on. You want to put your hands on his bare chest, press yourself against his warm body, crane your neck up to meet for a sweet kiss, but you don’t. Because you can’t. Because he isn’t yours.

So instead you just simply stand before him, leaning a hand onto the countertop.

He lets out an audible sigh of relief. “Shew, good. I was about to be pissed at you, Y/N,” he breathes as he playfully shoves your shoulder. “Standing me up on your birthday…”

You smile as you realize your feet are carrying you closer to him on their own. You try to stop them, try to tell them no, but you can’t. Now you’re standing in front of him, your chests almost touching as you let your finger trail up his arm to his neck. “I’d never stand you up, Danny. Not in a million years,” you murmur.

You feel his body stiffen as you let your singular fingertip connect with his skin, your touch a featherlight drift. You glance down at his hand balanced on the cold marble countertop, his fingers tightening and loosening under the weight of his own want to touch you back. You hear him breathe in, fast and choppy as you begin to manipulate the line between friends and more, truly unable to keep it black and white no matter how much you try. Finally you let your eyes look into his, dark and brooding and looking a lot like they do after a few rounds of self-indulgence with you.

“Good,” he growls, “because I have a hell of a night planned for us.”

Us.

“Is that right?” you question, still trailing your fingertip across his arm and neck. You can see the chill bumps forming on his skin now, and you can tell he is physically restraining himself from succumbing to his mental constraints. You have to admit, you’re finding it very satisfying, watching his mind tell his body no. The muscles in his arms flex and tighten as you step closer, slowly tiptoeing to bring your faces close, your lips barely ghosting his.

“That’s very right,” he whispers, opening his mouth slightly as if he’s going to kiss you, but instead pulling back a little. The proximity is enough to make you feel soaked already, your entire body buzzing with fire for him.

“When do you want me ready?” you breathe, letting your lips graze across his, your finger now hooked behind his bicep. His hands are still gripping as he balances between the island and the countertop as he leans down to you, restraining himself still yet.

He’s inhaling and blowing air quickly through his nose, and you know for a fact that he’s holding himself back with everything in him. His jaw clenches hard as his eyes stay trained on your lips. “Want you right now, if I’m being honest…” His words make the butterflies in your stomach explode their wings.

You can taste the wine still heavy on his breath. “But it’s not my birthday, Danny…” you retort.

He takes a deep breath. “I’m getting to a point where I don’t care.”

You swallow it down. Maybe your thoughts are mutual… Your heart is absolutely racing, like it would do when you found out your elementary school crush liked you back. You don’t even know what to say, at this point, you want him so badly…your vision blurring with the mental snaps of the two of you wrapped up in one another again.

“You should care, we have an agreement,” you admit through your teeth, as badly as it hurts to say it. “We set our rules.”

He scoffs hard. “I don’t remember signing my name on any dotted line, Y/N,” he spurts back, making you feel that drop in your stomach again. He wants to break the rules, too.

You bite your lips in, deciding to cut your losses. You step back from him, disconnecting your finger from behind his arm, and stepping away. The flushed look on his pink cheeks is enough to make you want to run back into his arms, and the look on his face makes it seem as though he just lost the one thing in his life he never planned on having, anyway.

“I asked you a question, Danny. When do you want me ready?” you say strongly.

He closes his eyes and recenters, swallowing down his thoughts. “Uh, uhm. F-Friday. Around 8.” He finally cleans up his expression and meets you with a smile again. “Be ready to celebrate.”

—--

DANNY POV

Friday rolls around more quickly than you thought it would. The group had decided to rain-check family dinner this week, planning on celebrating Y/N’s birthday the following weekend when everyone would be in town at the same time.

Your palms had been sweaty all day just at the thought of what tonight would hold, and you realize that you hadn’t been this anxious for a night together with Y/N, yet. The nerves are positively eating you alive, but you shove them down, knowing that you shouldn’t be having them in the first place. She doesn’t feel for you the same way you feel for her, and she likely never will.

It’s heartbreaking and wasteful, really, knowing that your sexual chemistry with her is only put to good use twice a fucking year when it should be being shared with her whenever you wanted to show her how much you really care, but. Here you find yourself.

She’s taking up all the extra space in your mind these days. You feel like you’re floating on air each and every time the vision of her face pops into your mind, you feel like you can feel the blood in your veins rising to a hotter temperature than you’ve ever experienced, and you find yourself wanting to give her all the things she’s ever wanted, and more. Your friend, one of your best friends, you’d say, unknowingly spinning herself into your life in a way that you can’t even tell her about.

That last birthday you shared together, your twenty-fifth, wasn’t the same as the rest before it. Sure, fucking her was high on your list of excellent sexual experiences thus far, but that last time, shit. Had your head spinning for days after. Never had a woman gotten you more fucked up than she did after that night. Two nights, really. That was when you knew it was real. When you wanted to ask her to stay, don’t go… be with me here and don’t ever leave… But your pride got the best of you. So you let her walk out, taking every single last bit of hope you had to make her yours with her as she walked out your bedroom door.

Could she not see it? Did she not notice how horribly you want her, all the time? Surely she doesn’t think you’re just being nice when you do little things for her… offer to change the oil in her car, take her lunch to work, send her every single funny meme and video you have ever come across simply because you know they’ll make her laugh…

Apparently not. But you don’t want to push too hard, too soon, either. If it’s meant to happen, it will. Hell, you hadn’t even told Sam about these feelings you’d been having. No one knows. This is a secret you’d kept bottled up for months now.

You come back inside after a quick trip to the grocery store and gently place the items from your arms onto the island, making sure the champagne bottle doesn’t tip over and break. You stick the bottle into the fridge and remove everything else from the plastic bags before rushing into your bedroom to make sure it’s presentable.

While she was at work, you’d spent the majority of the day cleaning up the general guy-ness of your bedroom, putting on a fresh set of sheets and giving the bathroom a good wipe-down. You’d never cared this much, for what she thinks of your surroundings…

…But you want tonight to be special. You want this birthday to be her favorite one, yet. And you’re determined to do so. You’d placed various candles around the surfaces of your bedroom, trying to make it romantic, but not so much that it will make her think you’re trying too hard.

When you decide that your room is as neat as it’s going to get, you go back into the kitchen and tear into the small cardboard box that’s been hiding away on top of your refrigerator for almost a month now. You’d seen an ad for it while scrolling instagram or something, and you knew right then that you had to get it. Your birthdays spent with her were becoming more and more experimental, and the idea for this year had fallen right into your lap.

You rip the packing tape off the box, letting it fall to the wayside as you open the flaps, finding the perfectly wrapped 2 and 5 candles in all their glittering glory. Shiny, crimson red wax with metallic gold trimming, long wicks and a thickness that regular store-bought candles just don’t have. You smirk as you pull them from the packaging and lay them in front of her small cake- chocolate with white buttercream icing. Her favorite. A glance at the clock on the stove lets you know you have an hour until she gets home, so you scurry off to the shower to get a last-minute scrub before you inevitably hear her coming through the door.

—--

Your stomach nearly falls to the floor when you hear the front door unlatch, and you find her a tired and flustered mess after her long shift. You busy yourself on your laptop, trying your best to seem more involved with what you’re doing than watching her unload her things from her arms onto the table.

“Hey birthday girl,” you mutter without looking back at her. “How was your day?”

You feel her lean all her body weight across the back of the couch beside you. “Long,” she huffs, “but not bad.”

You find the confidence to turn your head to her, finding her resting her head into her palm as she eyes you. You have to reel it all back in as you feel her so closely in your presence again.

“Good,” you reply, keeping it short. “Not too tired to skip our date?”

She hums a sweet laugh. “No. Most definitely not.”

“Are we…leaving the house? I’m trying to decide what to wear…” she asks shyly.

You have to remind yourself that she’s your friend, there’s nothing to be scared of, you do this all the time…

“No, actually. We’re staying home,” you reply.

Home. Your home, with her.

“Eight o’clock?” she reiterates.

“Yep, on the dot,” you tease as she stands to make her way to her end of the house.

She sways down the hallway, tossing her jacket over her shoulder as she disappears into the shadows. “I’ll meet you in the kitchen.”

—---

A few hours later, you’re leaned on the island swirling a lowball glass of tequila, waiting for her to emerge from her bedroom. You’d been standing patiently, fashionably early for your birthday date in the kitchen as you listened to the faint sounds of her music playing as she got ready.

Your nerves are already shot, the tequila doing little to assist in qualming the nervous anxiety swirling through you. So when you finally hear her bedroom door open and her steps coming down the hall, you have to tilt the rest back in hopes that it will hit you a little more quickly.

She’s dressed cute, but comfortable, and you can tell she did her hair that special way that you’d complimented a few weeks ago. She smells like sweet sugary flowers mixed with the woodsy smell of rain, and just her scent as she approached you was already driving you insane.

You meet her in the middle of the kitchen, grabbing her hand to twirl her around into your embrace. “Happy birthday, gorgeous,” you mutter, your face falling into her hair for a second.

Her arms lift around your neck, squeezing just a little as she places the sweetest kiss to your cheek. “Thank you, Danny.” You allow yourself to hold her for just a second, your right hand gripping the wrist of your left at the back of her waist.

“You hungry?” You ask as you pull away from her.

“Yeah, whatcha making?” she replies, taking a seat at the island.

You grab the box of the frozen pizza you’d previously thrown in the oven, displaying it for her.

“Oh my god, my favorite!” she squeals. “I’m so excited.”

You laugh as you fold the box up, cramming it into the trash can. “Knew you would be. It’s not a five-star birthday meal, but. Let’s be honest. I can’t cook for shit, and you love this pizza more than you love a lot of things…”

“No, you’re so right. I’ve actually been craving it for a while,” she giggles.

“Wait, I also gotttttt….” You make your way to the fridge, pulling out the bottle of champagne.

“Shit, pizza and champagne? You know exactly how to make a girl happy, Daniel.” She blushes a little, and you know you’re on the right track for the night.

“You gotta open it, though. It’s bad luck if someone else opens the champagne bottle on your birthday,” you lie, scooting the bottle to her across the countertop.

“You’re crazy. Give it,” she rolls her eyes as she takes the bottle, twisting the key seven times and removing the wire casing. She stands from her chair, gripping the bottle in both hands as she searches for somewhere to aim.

“At the wall! Just not toward a window!” you warn, closing one eye as she begins to push on the cork. Finally it pops off, flying toward the wall as the bubbly pours from the neck of the bottle. “Get it, Y/N, get it!”

She cups her lips over the overflowing bottle, slurping up as much as she can before it flows into the floor. The two of you laugh as you bring two glasses over, letting her pour them up. Just then the timer for the pizza goes off, and the sound of the beeps reminds you that time is ticking, making your nerves rush for the main event.

——-

After stuffing yourselves with pizza and downing the bottle of champagne, the two of you are piled up on the couch sharing a six pack of some crazy peach flavored beer she’d bought last week.

You’re seated on the couch as she reclines across it, her legs in your lap. You’d talked a lot tonight, like more than you maybe ever have before. Sure, you’d been friends for many years now, but majority of the time, you’re surrounded by the other guys always intervening on your conversations, or interrupting your discussions.

But after three hours of deep exchange, you swear you could talk to her until the end of time, and never get tired of it. She looks natural with her bare, sunkissed legs draped across your lap, and your hand that’s mindlessly drifting over her thigh and knee looks like it belongs there.

Her drunken laughter bounces off the walls and right into your chest, making your entire self beam with happiness and adoration for her. The way she takes up space in the home you share gives you an inexplicable feeling. Roommates doesn’t even begin to describe what you want to title your living situation with her.

Your faces are blotched red and tears are falling from your eyes as the two of you come down from a laughing fit, and a sweet recovery silence falls over the both of you. Her eyes are bloodshot from the alcohol, and her face is flushed from the belly laughs.

“You’re really pretty, Danny,” she flits, making you whip your head her way.

“What?” you ask, embarrassed.

“You’re pretty. Well, you’re handsome, of course, but. You’re also pretty,” she explains, her words making you feel shy.

“Oh, thank you, Y/N. Don’t think anyone’s ever told me that before…” you respond. Your hand grips into her thigh a little bit as your head falls back onto the couch cushion. You meet her eyes, the both of you staring at each other while everything else in the room disappears. You hold the gaze for a long while, each passing second making your breathing pick up. Fuck, she makes you nervous.

Finally, she stands, pushing her hair back behind her ear as she reaches for you to take her hand. “Take me to bed, Danny…” she whispers.

Okay.

You slowly stand, keeping her hand in yours as she pulls you into the center of the room. Like magnets, your bodies are pulled into one another, your hands finding both of hers as you turn to walk her backwards down the hall to your room. You move in slow motion as the two of you glide across the wooden floors, taking your sweet, special time.

You take her chin between your fingers, and push her hair back again before leaning down to press your lips to hers. It’s gentle and sweet and slow, her lips parting only just a little bit as you guide her down the long hallway. You allow yourself the indulgence of her lips, the feeling of her tongue gently swiping across yours, the flavor of everything that she is. It’s all perfect, she’s perfect.

Her hands finally find your face and hair, entangling themselves like they always do, pulling you further into her. For this only being the sixth time you’ve done this, it feels like the most natural thing in the world to you. It doesn’t make any sense that you waste your time thinking about it, instead of giving her the loving that she deserves.

But you plan on showing her tonight. You may not be able to tell her, but damned if you can’t try your best to show her.

“Wait, I almost forgot,” you pause as you approach your bedroom door. “I’ll be right back. Stay here,” you command, squeezing her shoulders. “No peeking,” you whisper as you watch her eyelids close.

You’d already strategically placed her cake on the table in your room, with two forks and no plates. But the last finishing touch is the sporadically placed candles. You grab your lighter from your nightstand and light them one by one, watching as the flickering flames cast a warm glow across your walls. Perfect. Lastly, you place the 2 and 5 candles in the center of the cake, but wait to light them.

You slip back out into the hall, finding her still standing with her eyes closed. You grab her hands and pull her to walk toward you. “Keep them closed.”

Her smile lights up your entire world. “What are we doing, Danny? I’m scared…”

“Don’t be scared, babe. S’just me…”

You pull her inside, instructing her to sit down on the bed as you grab the cake and lighter. You balance it in one hand and flick the lighter with the other, lighting the wicks of both the number candles.

“Open your eyes.”

Her eyes flick open, finding the room completely illuminated with orange glow. “Ah, Danny…” she gasps, glancing around the room, and finally to the cake in your hands in front of her.

“Hm hm hmm hm hmmm hmm…” you hum the Happy Birthday song, your voice a bit shaky and jittery with nerves. “Don’t forget to make a wish,” you say, watching as her eyes flick to yours, then back to the cake in your hands. She closes her eyes for a few seconds before opening them again, and blowing out the flames of her 25.

“You wanna know what I wished for?” she asks.

You shake your head. “No. But I hope it comes true.”

You set the cake down on your nightstand and you sit back down beside her on your bed. You bring her in close again, letting your forehead balance on hers before you make contact. You swear to it, you could get lost in kissing her more easily than you could get lost in a foreign country. You’d kissed her a hundred times before, but lately…now…

Things move slowly, things move sweetly…normally the two of you waste no time in ripping one another’s clothes off, biting and scratching and devouring each other like you’re starved, but tonight feels like it deserves more attention than that. It deserves to be appreciated.

Your hands drift to the bottom hem of her cream-colored eyelet lace dress, your hand drifting up her thigh. You pull the dress as you go, revealing her thong hugging her hip. Your hand slips below the waistband, and you run your fingers along it and down the front pantyline, the backs of your knuckles skimming across her heat. She whines a little at the contact, and you feel your vision growing blurry.

You continue kissing her while slowly letting your hands explore her in a way you’ve never let them before, taking special care to pay attention to your every move. The kiss becomes more longing when you let a digit slip into her folds, feeling her wetness coating your finger for the first time in six months. Her hands grip onto your shoulders, pulling your upper body into her. You push her back to lay on the bed, never once disconnecting your mouths.

Her left knee is bent into the air while the other one lies flat, so you push it to the side a little as your hand still hides in her panties. Her hand is yanking at the back of your hair as your featherlight touch drifts up and down, finally landing on her sweet spot. She cries quietly into your mouth when you land on it just right, using your middle finger to swirl her wetness across it.

She sits up a little, reaching to your back to pull your cotton t-shirt over your head. You disconnect for just a second to help her, and toss it to the floor. “Mmm there you are,” she mumbles, her hands rushing across the skin of your chest and arms while you go back to work.

You feel her legs spread, giving you the ok to move further. You let your two middle fingers dip inside of her to the hilt, her muscles already tight and twisting around you. “Fuck baby, you’re tight…” you pull away long enough to say. With your words she tightens around you on purpose, clenching herself as you begin pumping your hand in and out of her. You start to wonder if you’re the only one she’s slept with since December. Not that it’s any of your business, but, lately you’d decided that your feelings for her had gathered so heavily in your chest that that six month gap would be worth it, if it meant she could be all yours.

You watch her face in awe, suddenly feeling no ounce of shyness in the least in watching her come undone around your hand. Her bottom lip bites into her mouth as her eyelids flutter open and shut, and the sounds that escape from her lips make you realize how beyond ready for her you are.

You continue pumping your fingers in and out of her, feeling her drip down onto the bed sheets below you. “You wanna let go like this for me, baby?” you ask, having trouble keeping your breaths even.

“No. Yes, but no…” she concedes. “Wanna… want you…”

You smirk. “Go ahead, Y/N, we’ve got all night. You know how we are...” You take the opportunity to twist your fingers inside of her, turning your arm so that your palm is now pressed against her heat instead of perpendicular with it. You lean down and lick a stripe up the side of her neck as you leave your fingers buried deep, stopping the pumping altogether and instead wiggling the tips of your fingers against the spot deep inside her.

“Fuck Danny,” she breathes. “Keep it there keep it there…” Her eyes squeeze shut as you watch her chase her high, her hand squeezing at your pec and gripping onto it with everything she has.

It’s impressive really, how much you’d learned her body after just being with her a handful of times over the course of three years, learning her ins and outs and what drives her crazy for you, and stowing them away at the back of your mind until the next birthday.

You make quick and heady work of brushing your fingers across that spot, pressing your palm against her clit and adding just the right amount of circular pressure in both places. Her legs fall open even further and her head tilts back, all of her muscles tightening as she cries out, giving you her first orgasm of the night. And you had barely even removed any clothing yet.

When she’s done, you gather up her wetness and pull it onto her stomach under her dress, letting your middle finger massage it onto her skin. “Fuck…” she breathes out, wiping the hair from her face. “That didn’t take me long,” she laughs.

“No, it didn’t,” you agree, sitting up on the bed. “Must be excited to see me.”

She sits up and stands from the bed, pulling her flowy cream dress up over her hips and hiking one knee after the other across either side of you. You lean back away from her straddle, resting your arms back on the bed as you get a good look at her, already glowy. She reaches up and clasps her hands behind your neck. “Very excited to see you,” she admits shyly.

“Hm, really? You see me every day,” you poke, trying to feel out her level.

“Yeah but we can’t do this on random Tuesday afternoons, or in front of our friends, now, can we?” she presses, letting her hips fall onto your lap. You reach one finger to her chest and trail it up to under her chin, pulling her into you. Your heart begins pounding as you fall into a ravenous kiss again, this time bringing more heat than you even began to touch on a few minutes ago. Your hands fall to her waist, pulling her down onto you as she moves her knees to sit closer, pressing your chests together. Your hands travel across her thighs and to her waist, then finally around to grip her ass.

Though your tongue is burying itself deeply into her mouth, you’re metaphorically biting it. You want to tell her that yes, you do want to move things in another direction with her, you do want to hold her hand in front of your friends, you do want them to know how crazy you actually are for her. So in an act of boldness, you try.

“Maybe not in this regard, but they probably wouldn’t mind a little PDA…”

She giggles as she wraps her hands in your hair. “PDA? Like flirting with each other? In front of them?”

“Yeah, just like that. They already know we sleep together sometimes, they have to know we, ya know… are allowed to let it flow into days that aren’t our birthdays…” you swallow the words down, feeling so anxious that she may take them the wrong way, or hate them altogether.

“You think they’d make fun of us?” she asks, her mouth kissing behind your ear.

“Oh yeah, they would. But, I’d be there to slap the fuck out of them if they embarrass you,” you respond, squeezing your hands into her hips.

Her tongue is tickling the sensitive skin around your ear as she lays tiny pecks near your hairline. “I think I’d be okay with a little flirting… sometimes it almost happens naturally, anyway,” she says, making your heart rate soar again.

“Really?”

She nods, coming up to face you now, her cheeks tinted the palest pink. “Mmhm, sometimes I have to stop myself from touching you in front of them. You know, just innocently.”

You swallow hard, knowing the exact feeling all too well. When you’re surrounded by your friends making dinner or whatever it may be, you’ve found yourself having to stop your hand from grazing across her lower back as you walk by, from leaning down to kiss her cheek, anything, all the time. She’s right, it does feel natural to want to do that.

“I do, too, actually,” you admit. “You… It feels normal to me. Just a reflex.” You buck your hips up into her as you speak, your body begging you for some contact.

The whimper that leaves her chest ignites that deep carnal instinct inside you, wanting, needing to connect yourself with her again. You gather the soft fabric of her dress in your hands, signaling to her that you want to pull it off. She lifts her arms above her head, allowing you easy access to tear it all the way off of her. As her hair cascades back down over her shoulders you realize that her dress didn’t require a bra. So, you’re left staring at her left only in her thong, her breasts sitting more perfectly than you remember them. “You’re so gorgeous, Y/N, I swear…” you grit, raking over her body with your eyes.

She hops off of your lap, motioning with one finger for you to stand. When you follow her order, she falls to her knees, working her fingers to unbutton your jeans. “Fuck, wait,” you say. Her eyes glance up at you through her eyelashes. “Pull your hair back.”

She does as you say, pulling her hair into a ponytail at her neck while you undo your jeans with one swift movement. She gets done with her hair quickly, swatting your hand away and pulling your zipper down. “Take them all the way off, Danny,” she demands, and the backs of your knees hit the mattress as you lean over, kicking them and your underwear off one leg at a time. You kick them to the side as she walks on her knees closer to you, taking your already over-hard dick in her right hand, licking her lips just a little before she swirls her tongue around the tip. Everything had just happened really fast, her urgency making your blood pump. Her tongue flattened out against you, and she pressed you all the way to the back of her throat, almost making your knees buckle under you.

She grabs your hand, pulling it toward the back of her head. You take the signal and wrap your hand around her hair just as her lips meet your base, and you hold her there, feeling the saliva already beginning to pool in her mouth. “God damnit, baby, fuck you’re so good at this. Don’t even need my help…” You loosen your grip and allow her to drag her lips across your shaft, adding hard suction as she slowly ascends off.

“Want your help, though. Do it…” she motions, so you do. You use her ponytail to guide her up and down you, forcefully pushing and pulling on her head just like she likes it. The first time you did this, you were a bit thrown off, as you’ve always just let whoever was pleasing you do whatever they felt. But she likes it when you tell her when and where you want her to be.

The candles are physically heating up the air in the room, providing a heat that feels like a heavy blanket on your skin. Your mind flashes with remembering the special candles, and you feel a spark of excited electricity shoot through your body. The baby hairs around her face are beginning to stick to her forehead as her eyes glance up to look at you, doelike and pleading.

She hums onto your dick as you squeeze her cheeks together, taking a hard hold on her jawline as your opposite hand guides her motions. Your head falls back as you feel the knot tightening in your stomach, but you can’t let go just yet. Her tongue swirls around your tip and the sounds that her mouth is making sound downright ruthless, spurring on your albeit degraded current situation.

She moans onto you as her lips pull on and off, all by the force of your hand. You pull her hair particularly roughly, watching as the string of saliva connects her mouth to you, still. You take the second to sit down on the bed, physically unable to stand for another second without losing all will to hold yourself up. She moves in closer and digs her nails into the soft skin between your legs, sending a shake through your body. “Mother fucker baby, keep going with that…” you say, biting your bottom lip as you watch her. She scratches at your skin a few more times before you finally decide you can’t take it anymore, pulling and pushing on her head at a quicker pace.

“Mhmm…” she moans as she nods her head ‘yes’, and you feel the deep rumble in your stomach, telling you that you’re not far. She kisses her lips down tightly on you this time, flicking her tongue in all the right places as you feel her throat tightening around you.

“So fuckin’ deep baby, shit…” you say as your hips jut forward a few times, your dick hitting the back of her throat. Suddenly you feel your world falling apart as you let go into her, the dim orange light of the room turning into flashes of black and white as you send your streams down her throat. You wrap her hair around your hand as you hold her just where you want her, pulling her closely into you as you hiss through your release.

When you finally take a breath and your vision unblurs, you watch as she wipes her chin with the back of her hand, standing to her feet again and joining you on the bed, a completely smug and satisfied look on her face.

“The fuck are you grinning about, huh?” you ask, pulling her in toward you again.

“Nothin’, I just really love being the one to make you make noises like that,” she says, biting back another smile.

“Well, you’ve got me figured out, seriously,” you compliment her, and it was the absolute truth.

She shrugs you off. “Eh, I’m out of practice, really.”

Oh?

“No way, you’re like… well seasoned,” you kid.

“You dick!” she yells, stifling a laugh. “I haven’t even done that in six months.” You can tell she regretted saying it as soon as she did, suddenly avoiding your eyes and pulling one of your pillows up to cover her chest.

“...You’re kidding,” you breathe, truly in disbelief.

She shakes her head. “Lame, huh?”

“N-no, not lame. I–You haven’t, since…?” you stammer.

“Nope. Since your birthday. Go ahead, laugh at me all you want,” she says, motioning with her hand.

Her words hit you right in the gut. She hadn’t been with anyone since you…

“I’m not gonna laugh at you, Y/N. I… I actually haven’t been with anyone else, either.”

Her eyes meet yours in disbelief. “Really?”

You nod. “Not this time around.”

She sits for just a second, hugging the pillow to her. “Why not?”

You shrug, the nerves bubbling in your stomach. “I dunno, no one’s really…struck my interest. Not enough to bring back home, anyway.”

She pulls one shoulder up toward her ear. “Yeah, mine neither. I’ve…tried, ya know, but.” She swallows. “My birthday is my favorite holiday for a reason.”

You can’t stop the joy that rises in your chest, your extremities tingling and your heart beating in your ears as she basically admits she doesn’t enjoy anyone but you. She hasn’t made it work with anyone else in six months.

“Six months is a long time to wait, Y/N,” you mutter quietly.

She pulls the pillow down, moving closer to you on the bed. “Not when what you’re waiting for is all you can ever think about.”

Fuck… it feels like your head is going to float right off of your shoulders out of a pure high at her admission. Your chest gets warm and your mouth goes dry, and you swear if you were looking in the mirror, there would be stars in your eyes.

She feels the same.

After a few seconds of disbelief, you find the nerve to answer her, a hardly audible whisper as you bring your face close to hers. “I think I’d wait for you for fifty years, if you wanted me to…”

Her hand cups your jawline as she grits her teeth, pulling you into her again. Your mouth wants to devour her all over again, but instead you take note of the tender moment, laying a sweet kiss to her lips that has a promise behind it.

Her eyebrows furrow together when you pull away, a look you’re familiar with but also one that told you she’s confused. She opens her mouth to speak, probably to ask you if what you’d just said is true. But nothing comes out. She just stares at you in disbelief.

Your hand finds her hip as you yank her body in with a little force, almost nose to nose now.

“Yeah, you heard me right. I’d wait for you, I will wait for you, if that’s what you want me to do…” you say, feeling so anxious for the outcome of this conversation you could almost be sick. It’s either going to end really really well, or so badly that you’d end up alone in bed tonight. But the risk outweighs the outcome, and you are ready and prepared to take it, whatever it might be.

She swallows hard as you watch her eyes become glazed. Her hands are balancing around your neck and across your shoulders, and you can feel the heat rising in her palms as her digits nervously fidget. It feels like a hundred years pass in the time you wait for her to respond, and you contemplate taking it all back. Making up an excuse, saying just kidding, we’re just friends… But the panic stops as soon as she finds her words.

She shakes her head. “Wait for me… you’d, you wanna actually…?”

“Be with you more than just twice a year? Yeah, Y/N, I really would. You– you kinda have held a really special place for a long, long time now.” You swallow again, letting the words you’ve kept pent up for so long finally flow, but still feeling a little embarrassed by the admission. “I just never said anything, ya know, because of our arrangement. It worked so well for us but. I… I don’t know. It feels like more to me, lately.”

She nods hard again, a tiny smile crossing her lips as her eyes stay trained on yours. But she stays quiet.

“Can you say something, Y/N?” you ask through a huffed laugh.

“It is more, Danny. It’s been more to me for a long time, too. You take up more space in my mind than I’d like to admit,” she says, now avoiding eye contact.

Wow… finally. Finally, there it is.

“Why do we both deny it?” you whisper.

She shrugs, massaging the back of your neck. “I don’t know. But I don’t really want to anymore.”

You wrap your arm around her torso, pulling her weight from underneath her as you lay her flat on her back.

“Then we don’t,” you say as you tower over her, the candle light flickering in her eyes and off of her skin. Her body is beautiful, there’s no denying that, but what has always gotten you is how she carries herself…how her body language is always reflective of exactly what she’s feeling in the moment. And right now, as her midsection arches up into you begging you to touch her again, you have no other thoughts than to appease her.

Your mouth travels down her chest and across her belly, leaving long, lingering kisses across her body. As you get closer and closer to her heat, you move to kneel on the floor just as she had for you earlier, slipping your hands underneath her to pull her to the edge. Even in all your wild, drunken sexual adventures with her, for some reason, you’d never concentrated on this. You’d never gone down on her. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to, as it was one of your favorite activities, but the immediate pull to one another on these nights always ended up with getting straight to the good part. Neither of you really ever left time for the embellishments.

She perks up onto her elbows as she gazes at your face between her legs. “Danny…”

“Let me show you what I mean, baby,” you more ask than say, running your tongue down the inside of her thigh. Her body stiffens as she still gives you that look of hesitation. Your tongue drifts over her opening as you tease her, barely ghosting overtop of everywhere but her sweet spot. She shudders again. “Unless you don’t want me to…”

“No! No I want you to. Please. You’ve just…” she finally relaxes her head back down.

“I know I haven’t. And that’s on me. But I wanna show you that I’ve been thinking about this, doing just this since the last time I had you…” you explain, finally delving your tongue deeply into her. Her reaction is immediate, her back arching up again as her hands find your hair. The sounds she makes make you strain to keep it together, and the taste of her finally on your tongue is enough to make you want to stop altogether, and get to the good part, but you savor this instead, realizing you’ve wanted her like this for so long.

You squeeze your lips over her, inching your tongue languidly inside of her and moving it back up to circle her clit. When you finally find it, she squeals, exhaling as her hands rip into your scalp. You glance to the head of the bed, pulling down a pillow and positioning it underneath her back to get a better angle. Your hands snake under her again, squeezing her ass as you pull her in.

“Fuck Danny, why did you hold back on this for so long?” she asks through a pant, her legs opening and closing over your ears. “Shit…” You realize that you don’t really have an answer.

She’s writhing and fighting herself, and you can tell she’s nearing the peak, until she backs off again, likely wanting to make this last. She hums and purrs as you work over her clit, using your tongue and lips to kiss every single drenched inch of her. You feel like you can’t get enough, until you remember. Her birthday gift.

You slow things down, pulling away a bit until you see the disgruntled look on her face at the disconnect. “No, don’t stop… don’t go..” she begs. Her expression is desperate, and you want nothing more than to feel her lose herself at the mercy of your mouth. So you dive back in, this time with a purpose.

“‘M not goin’ anywhere, baby,” you manage through kneads of your tongue against her. You bring your arm up between the two of you, using your elbow and hand to press her legs apart while your free hand’s two middle digits enter her again. Your tongue never lets up, circling and swirling furiously as her muscles tense. You take that as your cue to work harder, feeling her clenching around your hand already. You pump in and out of her again, making sure your tongue is pointed exactly where she needs it.

“Fuck, Danny baby… yes…” she breathes, and the pet name sends a shockwave straight to your dick, hearing her utter your name followed by a word so personal. You cup your lips over her clit, using a quick and harsh suction motion as you flick your tongue across it.

When she finally lets go, her cries and slurs of curses echo through your room, the most beautiful sound you’re sure you’ve ever heard. Her hands stay tangled in your locks, forcing your face into her as close as you can get. You savor it all, the sight, the sound, the taste… you wonder why you ever denied yourselves this piece of the puzzle after all this time, but then again, maybe saving something this intimate for right now is exactly what was supposed to happen.

Her body jolts and shakes as she lets the pleasure wrack through her, and you devour every last bit. You crawl up her once she opens her eyes again, her hand freeing from your hair and back down to your face, pulling across your cheeks and mouth as she wipes her wetness from you. Her voice is strained as she finally speaks. “Fuck that was…”

“Fucking delicious,” you finish, pressing your lips to hers again, making her nod into you.

“Yeah, fucking delicious,” she agrees, wrapping her legs around you and using the leverage to pull you onto her. If you weren’t rock hard before, you surely are now after witnessing her falling apart for you like that. You can tell she’s already ready to get things going again, but you stop her, pulling away like you had done before. You stand from the bed, watching that same look of disappointment come across her features.

“Don’t look at me like that, just wanna give you your birthday gift,” you say, walking around the bed to your nightstand. You grab the cake and place it carefully into your lap, grabbing the lighter again as she comes and sits beside you.

“I already blew out my candles, Danny,” she says, balancing her chin on your shoulder.

“You did, but I didn’t tell you that these are special candles. Not meant to be blown out,” you explain, flicking the lighter to life and igniting them both.

“Not meant to be blown out? Why–”

“Because they’re really an oil,” you say, putting the lighter down and grabbing the plastic tray under the cake again, holding it up between you. “These are candles specially made for us to let melt and drip onto each other. Not like regular wax, these don’t burn as hot. Once they start to melt a little, they turn into a body oil.”

“Like a massage oil?” she asks, and you nod.

“Mmhm, see, you can already smell the lavender and bergamot. They had birthday cake scented, but. I thought that might be overkill,” you smirk. Her eyes drift down to the candles with intrigue, and she bites her bottom lip in. “We don’t have to, if you don’t want to. But, I’ve heard good things…”

She picks up one of the candles from the cake, carefully licking the icing off the bottom. She holds her opposite hand out palm down, and lets the melty wax oil drip down onto the back of her hand, a few droplets of dark red liquid dripping down between her fingers.

“Doesn’t burn at all,” she says, reaching to grab the cake from you to set on the table again. She then takes your hand, letting the wax drip down onto your hand, too.

The sensation is more of an extremely warm electrical pulse than the burn you’d expect, and it quickly dulls as the oil cools. It doesn’t harden like normal wax, instead it just turns into a thick oil. You take your other finger and rub it across your skin, feeling the softness of the lotion-like liquid sink into your skin. “Wow, no, it feels good,” you agree.

“Lay back,” you suggest, and she does, handing the candle off to you.

You question the situation, not knowing exactly where to drip the oil to make her feel the best. You assume maybe her chest and stomach, maybe even down her legs, if she feels up to it. You hold the candle directly above her sternum, raising your eyebrows in final question before you let it drip.

“Yeah, go ahead,” she says, her hand landing on your knee.

The red liquid finally falls through the air, a singular drop that lands and splatters across her chest. Her mouth opens just a little, but then her surprise quickly turns into a devious smirk. “Feel good?” you ask.

“Aha, yeah, actually. It burns pretty bad for a split second but it goes away…shit, do more,” she pleads.

You go along with her request, drizzling tiny drops between her breasts and down her stomach, nearly completely coating her in the oily liquid.

“You sure you like it?” you ask as you watch her face repeatedly turn from a surprised grimace into a devilish look of satisfaction. Thankfully, that second look, you’re more than familiar with.

“Yessss…” she hisses as another drop falls onto her skin. “I feel so…” her mouth lies open as you continue letting the oil drip and pool, the floral scent filling your nostrils.

“So what?” you ask.

Her eyes bore into yours as she bites her lips between her teeth, her hand still gripping hard into your leg muscle. “I like the pain. It’s like… I don’t know how to explain it…” she breathes. “Like a sensation I don’t want to ever end.”

You take your free hand and gently massage it in, taking time to work over her nipples and stomach. “God, that feels so good…” she whispers, her hand now digging into the muscle of your thigh. You place the candle back on the cake, turning to pay special attention to rubbing your hands over her muscles.

The heady scent of the oils mixed with the residual alcohol still flowing through your system brings a whole new dizziness to the atmosphere, and you feel as though the whole situation is only becoming heavier. You reach over to your phone sitting on the night stand, and flip your music to some psychedelic playlist. The distorted guitar and scratchy bass sounds bring you both to a new plane, and you take the moment to recognize the woman you have your hands on, and how she feels underneath them.

Her eyes flutter open and closed as your hands drift, massaging the soft oils across the mountains and valleys of her body. “You want me to do you?” she asks, eyes flicking back to the candle.

You shake your head. “No, shh. It’s your birthday, just relax.”

She smiles a little as she gets comfortable again, moving her body a little closer to yours on the bed. Your hands travel up her shoulders and neck, slowly kneading the tense muscles. Then you move on to her hips and waist, squeezing at the thickness of her. You feel yourself getting turned on all over again just by touching her this way. You watch as her hands drift across the tops of her legs, gripping at her own thighs. The visual is almost too much, watching as her fingertips pull at her skin. You reach to grab the still-lit candle, adjusting your body to sit beside her legs.

“‘M gonna try your legs, that okay?” you ask.

“Yeah, go ahead…” she mumbles, her eyes still rolling around behind her eyelids. You move between her legs and let the wax drip onto her inner thighs, not really caring if any lands on your comforter. “Ffff…” she hisses, biting onto her bottom lip. Her face contorts from pain to pleasure as the oil cools, and you replace the candle, making your way back to massaging her.

Your hands nearly cover the entirety of her upper thighs, your fingertips digging into the skin just as hers had done a second ago. You push the oil all around, paying special attention to start at her knees, and slowly work your way up. You have half a mind to lick into her again, seeing it now from this view, but you stop yourself. Your thumbs rub into the creases where her legs meet her heat, and she practically moans out at your touch.

“You’re being such a fuckin’ tease, Daniel,” she says, her hands cupping her breasts.

“Mmm, I don’t think you understand how hard it is to stop myself right now…” you huff.

She bites her lips again and shakes her head side to side, obviously feeling the same emotions as you. This doesn’t feel like it normally does, and you feel more anxiety than ever to satisfy her. You watch as she reaches her hands for you, signaling for you to get things going.

“Don’t stop yourself then,” she stutters, her voice almost shuddering. Her hand grips into your hair again and pulls you up, your hands crawling up either side of her as her nails claw and pull at your back.

Suddenly your mind finds itself again as you remember to grab protection. You balance your forehead on her sternum, both of you already panting and sweaty as you pull yourself away to reach for your bedside drawer.

“No, just—it’s fine,” she says, grabbing onto your arm.

You meet her with a puzzled look, not quite understanding that she’s changing her mind on a whim. This is one part of your agreement that you both have always stuck to.

“What? I’m—“

“Just…it’s fine. Don’t get it,” she says, giving you a look that could kill. “It’s been six months…right…”

You think it over, rolling the thought over and over in your mind. “You sure?”

She nods, “Yeah, yeah I’m sure. I’m…we’re good. I promise.”

You feel your heart growing in your chest, feeling a new wave of anxiousness and…something else bubbling up. It’s almost blinding you to even think about what’s about to take place, this already feels so different than before.

The slick of the oil across your chests make your bodies slide against one another as you line yourself up, both hands on either side of her head. Her hands gently drift across your hips, a devilish smirk sneaking across her lips.

“Gonna feel you for real for the first time…” she says gently, looking more excited than you’d seen her in ages.

“Yeah, no pressure,” you answer, pressing yourself through her folds. The sensation alone is making you quake, feeling her against you without a barrier.

“What, you nervous or something?” She asks, digging her nails into your scalp.

You clench your jaw, feeling the tip enter her just a little bit. “Kinda.”

“Daniel…shut up. No you’re not.”

“I swear,” you reply, pressing in just a little more. “Different now, like this.” You feel your heart beating from your ribcage.

Her hands grip behind you, pulling you in towards her, but you hold back. “S’okay, just me… please…” Her legs lift and her ankles cross at your lower back.

You push forward, telling yourself it’s okay to fill her all the way to the hilt. It’s now or never, and you’ve waited so long for this, wanted her for real for so long. You make sure to watch her face as you bottom out, taking in every single detail that you can.

HER POV

It’s almost dreamlike…

The dim and comforting glow of the room, the sweet scented oil that’s relaxed your muscles, the dying feeling of excitement from the gift Danny had gotten you…

But mostly, the feeling of his body towering over you and buried as deeply as he can get, finally without the use of protection.

You’d been wanting Danny for real for longer than you’d like to admit, now, and now that it’s finally happening, it’s almost as if you couldn’t have dreamt it up any better. Of course he feels nervous…you do too. Something in the air has shifted, and it’s not just because you both had finally admitted to wanting more than your predisposed agreement.

“Fuck, Danny…” you can’t help but yelp in a pitiful high-pitched squeal. Feels just like you always thought, but somehow better.

Much, much better.

He begins to pick up a pace after you lock your ankles against him harder, forcing his hips to find a rhythm. “You good?” he asks, almost shyly.

“Yeah, better than good, shit…”

His left hand grips your jaw with a little force before he brings his lips to yours in a heated mess. His thrusts are working in perfect time, hitting you in just the right spot to tighten the knot deep inside you already.

“You feel so perfect baby…god, never thought I’d have you like this…” his lips are hot against your skin as he speaks, his teeth nipping at your sensitive spots every few seconds.

“Leave a mark, baby… gimmie a reminder…” you breathe into his ear, making the light nips on your chest switch into slightly painful lovebites that you’re positive you’ll be able to see turn into bright red marks tomorrow. He growls into your skin as his teeth sink in just enough to make you squirm beneath him.

Though the room is flickering with a tangerine glow, the multicolored vibrance of the light flashing behind your eyes brings a whole new depth to what you’re experiencing, an overwhelming feeling of unwarranted pleasure that is undoubtedly ripping you apart at the seams. He’s all you’ve ever wanted, better than anything you’ve ever felt, and he’s been living under the same roof as your best friend for way too long.

You can tell he’s getting closer by the tumbling of his thrusts, but you swear you never want it to end. The euphoria taking over your mind is making you dizzy.

Suddenly he slows down a little bit, rolling himself to the bed but keeping himself inside as he plucks you to straddle his lap. Your hands find his pecs as you begin swirling your hips, feeling him at a completely different angle, now. His curls are laid out behind him on the white blankets, and his chest is gleaming from the oils.

You begin bouncing on him, his hands gripping into the thick muscle of your thighs as you grind on him. His head leans back, his jaw moving between hanging open and clenching tightly. “Y/N, shit…I’m not gonna be…”

You can feel the twist in your stomach, the deep tightening letting you know that you are close, too. You lean down and press a slow and needing kiss to his lips, showing him all the emotion that’s currently coursing through your body in the act. “Me too baby, just do it. Want to feel you…” you stammer through the ravaging feeling of your impending orgasm. You squeeze him hard, sending you both over the edge, tumbling down together in a flustered mess of echoed praises for one another.

He stays buried inside you for just a few seconds as you both come down, neither of you wanting to be the first to speak when you finally catch your breath. After a minute of silence, you let yourself come out of the cloudy bliss, sliding yourself up and off of him.

As soon as your body hits the bed beside him, he’s craning over you again, gathering you up into his arms into the most loving embrace you’d felt from him yet.

“Every six months isn’t gonna work for me anymore, Y/N…” he admits, fully submitting himself with an honest look in his eye. “I just…”

“Me neither, Danny. It’s not enough. Won’t ever be enough,” you admit, taking his face in your hands. And it was true, after experiencing him tonight in the way that you did, there was no way you’d ever be able to wait for him again. There’s too much emotion involved that you’ve both been hiding for too long. Too much still yet to explore.

“Stay, please? And not just for tonight,” he whispers, his thumb gliding across your cheek.

You nod. You know there’s nothing on this earth you want more than to wake up every day next to him…the friend who has always been just a little bit more.

“Okay,” you concede, sliding your body into his.

“Okay? Yeah?” He asks with an excited lilt.

“Yes. I’m not going anywhere,” you respond. “Couldn’t leave you if I wanted to...”

The low chuckle that rumbles through his chest and onto your cheek pressed against it feels so longingly familiar that you wonder why you ever thought it wouldn’t work out to begin with. “What took you so long?” he asks, wrapping and squeezing you hard.

“Could ask you the same…” you laugh into his chest.

You fall asleep with him that night a different woman than the one you were when you walked into his room, and not just because you’re a year older, now. You’d finally gotten everything you’d ever wanted.

Danny nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck, sleep already lacing his voice. A soft feeling of comfort washes over you as you realize how safe and protected you feel in his arms, and how you aren’t too shy to admit that this feels more right than you could have ever anticipated.

Now you won’t have to wait six months to share your love with him again. You’ll be able to share it with him tomorrow, over coffee in the kitchen.

He presses a sweet kiss to your temple as you let the heaviness of sleep overtake you, already falling into a dazed place of complete contentment.

“Happy birthday, baby.”

Taglist:

@wetkleenex-gvf @britney-gvf @gretas-sweat @josh-iamyour-mama @highway-tuna @bestfriendsallstrungout @jjwasneverhere @gretavanbrie @writingcold @thewritingbeforesunrise @myleftsock @edgingthedarkness @its-interesting-van-kleep @jjsooobsessed @ageofcj @starcatcher-jake @capnjaket @cozyjakey @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface @stardustjake @dancingcarbon @builtbybrokenbells @gretavangroupie

283 notes · View notes

princeblue · 4 months ago

Text

People wail and cry for stories that focus on platonic relationships and then discards all platonic relationships for romantic ones. And I feel like the kny fandom is a really good example of this.

Demon slayer is a straightforward story with family oriented and goal driven characters and a story that focuses on the bonds of platonic relationships forefront and center.

Tanjirou wants to avenge his family, keep his sister safe and turn her back to a human.

Zenitsu wanted to honor his gramps (yes that’s his actual reason and I will not argue on this)

Genya wants to apologize to his brother

Sanemi wants to keep genya safe

Shinobu wanted to avenge kanae

Giyuu wanted to avenge/honor his sister and sabito, protect Tanjirou and nezuko.

Muichirou later on wanted to live his life for his brother

Even kokushibos whole thing about how he Hated yoriichi and wanted him dead and to kill him vs seeing a genuinely sweet and caring and loving brother in yoriichis pov and everything kokushibo had ever stood for since yoriichi left/their mother died being contradicted in an instant when we see the flute in his clothing after he dies.

And so on and so forth.

And like anyone ever focuses on, and argues on. Is ships, canon or fanon, and sexuality/gender headcanons. For a series that is set in taisho era japan on the brink of World War One.

And I understand queer people existed during these times and that they had conflicts with themselves and others and etc, that comes with anyone in any time period. But it is still not the forefront of the story, platonic relationships are. All our romantic relationships just, do not have the same significance or impact on the story I have to say.

Obamitsu was a small (and beautiful/painful) moment at the end of the series, tankana didn’t actually happen until the Very end. Same with zenitsu/nezuko, aoi and Inosuke were the same as tankana. The uzuis got their one season but it was about finding each other and then killing ume and gyutaro. WHO speaking of, were literally conjoined together because they didn’t want to leave each other because of a promise neither remembered until they were actually dead.

I could even bring up gyomei and his ordeal with raising orphans and his relationship with genya, so on and so forth. There’s countless amazing platonic/sibling relationships. And yet I’m seeing stupid ass debates on Twitter about how an mlm couple could conceive and have descendants towards the end of the manga. Like ??

(And not to mention how people will horribly mischaracterize complex characters to toxic daddy abusers and woobify the other partner, most typically in mlm ships which would constitute as fetishizing imo.)

And I’m not saying it’s not valid to project or headcanon for fun, because I have also done that many times!! Aroace sanemi, bi genya, genderfluid genya! But there’s a line to it and everything else, when you start discarding the importance of platonic bonds to characters in favor of the romantic ones (aka my biggest problem with people who ship Sanemi with characters because 99% of the time they do this with him and Genya) then it’s no longer fun and it’s no longer cool and it in fact, makes you look stupid.

125 notes · View notes

mikaela-the-slut-expert · 11 months ago

Text

The God of Song's

Second Ascension

Xie Lian x M!Reader x Hua Cheng

Alright listen y'all. I'm adding a previous part to my first glance series. BECAUSE I really want my timeline to follow the novel's timeline and most of the lines follow the novel as well. I want the story to focus on my OC so obviously it'll be his pov. Be patient with me y'all 😭

The whole point of the part is just to give Y/n some depth? To explain partially my OC's background and abilities. Like I had to put some foundation for the ready bro.

Dúshé means poison laced tongue

Mûguô means bitch or whore

Míngqín means song bird

if you see the name Mei Li, just read it as Y/n I tried replacing them all but I'm blind

_____________________________________________

Y/n is a rarity. An unnatural beauty with white hair. A being who uses his siren like vocals and imitation against others. A majority of heaven officials are wary of him and are diligent on keeping their distance. The reason being, he dips between both realms.

Y/n is a ghost, who ascended and became a god. That's why most people don't like him. He's strange and shouldn't possibly exist. A ghost who became a god? That's an anomaly. What could be worse than that? An anomaly that has power.

He's a god of the upper court and yet he doesn't have his own palace. He rejected it choosing to make his own domain in the mortal realm. Just like a ghost would. His reason being? It's closer to Xie Lian. Y/n having so much power as a god and a ghost, with the ability to wipe out a nation leaves the other officials anxious. They'd prefer if he was banished from the Heavens. Which he was. Even then 6,000 temples stayed up in his favor.

They have many names for him: Y/n, God of Song, dúshé, general, and even the name mûguô was passed around for a while. Only Xie Lian uses the nickname, míngqín.

He used to be a general for XianLe and an imperial guard for Xie Lian. They grew up together, along with Feng Xin and eventually Mu Qing. But everyone knows the stories. Mu Qing stopped following Xie Lian after his banishment and never spoke a good word of him again.

Feng Xin and Y/n however stayed loyal. They grew up together, and were banished together. And yet Feng Xin and Y/n grew apart. Feng Xin and Xie Lian grew apart. Leaving y/n with Xie Lian alone. A banished ghost and a banished prince.

So their wishes came true, but not forever. When the bell in the Heavens starts to toll and shake everyone is expecting to see a newcomer. They must be powerful with how hard the bell rings, surely?

The official's hopes were diminished when they saw the familiar silhouette of Y/n and Xie Lian. He ascended a second time!? And Xie Lian he...he...he fucking ascended a third time?!

Y/n looks much different his face hides behind a veil now. Only his striking blue eyes can be seen. He stands by Xie Lian's side as the other officials whisper. None of them notice the bell fall... Or as someone's golden palace gets ruined.

**********************************************************

Y/n stands next to Xie Lian while Ling Wen talks about his highness getting first place, for once. Of course for nothing good. Something about banishment but at least Xie Lian got 100 merits for it.

Y/n gets lost in thought and starts paying attention to his two birds, Wèizhī. It's supposed to be one, conjoined name but the twin birds liked the name for both of them. Yes Y/n has birds. While other gods have families as swords, or ghosts have butterflies. Y/n has his birds. They're Oriental Magpies and they represent Y/n perfectly. Both of them imitate others, and both of them sing.

Y/n's attention is brought back when Ling Wen points at a 'bell'. He looks over to the civil god with an arched brow. "Ling Wen I know you're tired but there's no bell up there", he says with a shrug

"There was a bell there. When general Li and his highness ascended you both caused quite the turmoil. Causing the bell to fall on a passing by heavenly official" she explains.

She points in another direction, "Do you see that golden palace?" Xie Lian smiles, "Ah yes I can."

"It was put up to replace an official's golden palace that was damaged from your ascension" and Xie Lian's smile falls into a nervous one.

"So we've offended many officials from the moment we arrived?" Xie Lian confirms

"If you can make amends maybe not"Ling Wen

Y/n places a hand on his hip and cocks it to the side, "How do we make amends then?"

"Easy, just pay eight million eight hundred eight thousand merits" Ling Wen adds, "Of course I know you both don't have a tenth of that amount."

Y/n gawks behind his veil. He groans and Xie Lian grins. ,"Please allow us to think about what we should do" he heaves a long sigh.

The two of them walk to the side and Mei Li watches Xie Lian crouch down in distraught. " A-Lian I can pay for it, half of it was my fault after all" you frown patting his head.

"Ah no that's not necessary, I'll find a way. So please don't waste your merits on me, míngqín." Míngqín, a nickname Xie Lian made for you long ago. You love it. Yes you are a songbird, and you're his songbird.

Y/n glances away, he'll pay for it when he gets the chance. Right now he'll stay by Xie Lian's side. "Oh we should probably find the array for the upper court. I don't have the password anymore." Xie Lian brings his fingers to his temple and Y/n does the same.

They search through multiple arrays, some even bet on how long they'll stay this time. When they finally find it someone whispers, "So his highness and his general are back?"

Xie Lian brightens when they finally find the array he's looking for, "Yes I'm back!" Y/n cocks his hip and doesn't answer.

The heavenly official chuckles languidly, "his highness and general /n caused a tremendous force this time, yes?"

Xie Lian rubs the back of his neck, "Ah well it wasn't so bad." Y/n crosses his arms.

Another official cuts in, "It wasn't so bad for his highness, but my luck isn't as good" While Xie Lian looks very sorry, Y/n doesn't.

It seems Xie Lian doesn't know who they're talking to but Y/n knows it's Mu Qing. He cocks his hip and Xie Lian thinks to himself, that one day Y/n might pop his hip out if he keeps up. "This one heard that General Xuan Zhen flicked it and the bell split in half though? Surely it didn't cause the great general much pain?" Y/n hums in fake sympathy and checks his nails.

They're interrupted by another official. Y/n sighs at this.

"Who the fuck knocked down my palace?! SHOW YOURSELF!" Y/n covers his ears as he recognizes Feng Xin.

Feng Xin and Mu Qing start bickering about something, Y/n looks over to Xie Lian. To see if he's doing okay with the familiar faces.

Xie Lian laughs nervously, "it was my fault I apologize, I didn't mean for it to get out of hand"

Mu Qing replies sarcastically, "Oh what a coincidence."

This upsets Y/n, he crosses his arms and sets a glare on Mu Qing. "Are you implying we did it on purpose as an act of revenge? General Xuan Zhen I thought you knew by now the world simply does not revolve around you. I think you want to be a victim." He spits. He refuses to sit here while Mu Qing slanders Xie Lian's name. Off to the side he can other people whisper dúshé.

Mu Qing scoffs, but Xie Lian cuts in, "I will try my best to compensate you, I apologize"

Y/n glares at Mu Qing's spot. The man glares back but he falls silent and invisible.

Xie Lian and Y/n leave the array afterwards.

Y/n frowns and plays with a piece of his long hair. "This one is sorry A-Lian, I just couldn't stay quiet"

Xie Lian waves a hand and smiles, "It's alright no need to apologize."

Ling Wen has invited Xie Lian and Y/n to the great hall so that's where they go. Y/n watches over Xie Lian's shoulder reading the scroll she gave them. Apparently they can earn merits if they solve this "ghost groom" issue.

Y/n hums, "We can do it A-Lian we've experienced worse"

Xie Lian nods, but looks back at Y/n nervously. "Yes but I also can't use any spiritual devices", "Then maybe it's better to get the help of some deputy generals?" Ling Wen adds.

"That's why I'm here, I'll gladly do the work for you-"

"But I don't want you to do all the work for me, I'll feel bad, so for my sake let's get help from some middle officials?" Xie Lian smiles nervously, of course he doesn't want to push Y/n. He does so much for Xie Lian already.

Y/n cocks his hip, and glances to the side "I suppose, but who will really come help?"

Xie Lian laughs, "Ah you're right. Ling Wen I'm afraid no one will willingly come to my aid"

She waves a hand though, "I'll get you some help don't worry". Then she goes into the array, and asks who could send two martial officials to help the emperor.

It probably would have worked too, if Mu Qing hadn't ruined it, "I heard the emperor isn't in the north at the moment. This help must be for his highness right?"

Ling Wen sighs, "You're always in the array these days General Xuan Zhen, congratulations you seem to have plenty of time."

"My hand is wounded, I'm currently nursing the injury." Mu Qing replies coyly

"Oh? You poor thing I didn't know it took a bell to take you out General" Y/n adds smugly.

They all leave the array once it's obvious no one is coming to help.

"It's alright A-Lian I don't mind doing it" Y/n hums softly running his hand over Xie Lian's arm.

"Yes, we're used to being alone so we'll leave it as is" he sighs.

"May heaven Officials give their blessings" Ling Wen says.

"No paths are bound!" Xie Lian replies and leaves in a dashing manner. Y/n follows him with a sigh. He has to make sure Xie Lian doesn't fall out of heaven.

__________________________________________________

Okay guys. So if y'all have read this and the first glance series please tell me if you like it 😭🙏.

Tea Shop

#hualian #hualian x reader #tgcf headcanon #hua cheng x reader #tgcf #tgcf x male reader #tgcf xie lian #xie lian x reader #xie lian #tgcf hualian #tgcf hua cheng #hua cheng #mu qing

268 notes · View notes

corneliaavenue-ao3 · 2 months ago

Text

Summer's a Knife (a graveyard fic)

Graveyard fics are fics that I started and will never return to. Some are vague outlines, some are 4 sentences, some are 40 pages. But if they haunt me, I want them to haunt you too.

I am actually sad that this became a graveyard fic. But I truly cannot write it anymore. I wanted to release this first chapter in May of 2022... you see how well that went for me.

This is the first summer after the war from Ginny's POV. It is sad, it is romantic, it deals with grief. It was going to have flashbacks to Ginny's sixth year. It was going to have 4 big chapters and a small epilogue, each chapter focusing on a month. It was going to be one of my favorite things I wrote. Unfortanetly, I don't feel that way anymore.

May (chapter title: so long daisy May) is the only complete (non-edited) chapter. I knew what I wanted to write in June (the best and worst day of June), no clue what July (I've been down since July) would bring, and an idea for August (August slipped away)

I even had a playlist made

Chapter 1 is below the cut because it is 10k words, and I am giving it all to you. After that I will explain the rest of the vibes of the fic with some snippets I wrote. Sorry this is a LONG POST.

You say that we'll just screw it up in these trying times. We're not trying.

If I bleed, you’ll be the last to know

So Long Daisy May

Ginny’s bloodstained trainers echoed on the cobblestone path to her Great Aunt’s house.

Once again, she was sent away for being too young. It wasn’t that long ago her parents were begging her to leave, to come back here for safety away from the final battle. Harry gave her a look that he didn’t want to see her either. She stayed of course. Fought in the war that was her fight as much as any other member of her family’s fight. Probably even more than most of them to be honest.

Now the war was over, she was sent away again. Her mum didn’t want Ginny to stay at Hogwarts any longer than necessary, wary of any lurking danger from Death Eaters still roaming the grounds. The Burrow was not safe yet. Her dad, Bill, and Charlie left soon after Voldemort fell to ensure that their home would be safe for them to come home. Molly Weasley could not bear to convince George to leave his twin’s side in the room of all the deceased. Ron was off somewhere once again, probably conjoined to Harry and Hermione’s sides, unbearable for them to separate.

That is how Ginny ends up with Percy of all brother’s returning to Great Aunt Muriel’s cold mansion that foggy, early morning.

Percy took a moment to knock on the front door. Ginny was planning to just walk inside, finding herself too tired to care about politeness and proper etiquette.

The front door swung open 30 seconds later, a small house elf stood in the entryway.

“Hey, Milsey. We were sent here to update Muriel and wait it out until the Burrow is safe,” Ginny said.

Milsey bowed down, “Of course, anything for Prewett blood.”

Ginny didn’t even try to hide her eye roll. She could practically hear Hermione in her ear ranting about House Elf Welfare.

“You don’t need to bow for us, Milsey,” Percy said. The first words he said aloud since their mum sent them here. Ginny did not know what to make of Percy anymore. He was the only brother who noticed anything was wrong with her during her first year at Hogwarts, and then he was the only one who checked up on her during her second year. Then he stopped caring about her. Ron told her that he got a letter from Percy telling him to stop being friends with Harry during his fifth year. She didn’t even get that. She could not understand how he could ignore his family for two years, and then come back begging for forgiveness.

Fred had forgiven him.

The thought of Fred made her entire insides clench. She wanted to vomit even though she had not had anything to eat in hours.

Percy walked through the front door, Ginny closely following.

“I am 109 years old, I just can’t have people showing up to my house unannounced at the crack of dawn. I have not even finished my tea yet this morning. Ginevra, your shoes are filthy. Take them off before you step on my Egyptian Rug, it is older than me and made from Sphynx fur,” Ginny’s aunt said in one breath.

Muriel stood in the doorway, wrapped in her silk nightgown, arms folded, looking very unpleased to see her niece and nephew. “And where is Molly? I need to speak with her about her inability to raise polite children who give warning when they are going to visit their aunt!”

Ginny felt Percy’s hand wrap around her bicep, warning her to not make a retort. “We will make sure we give you notice next time we visit, Auntie Muriel. Thank you for letting us pop in this morning,” Percy said, using his trademark pompous voice.

Muriel grunted, "I missed you Percy. You were always the most respectable Weasley. The Prewett blood runs strong in you."

Percy squeezed Ginny's arm again as a reminder to stay calm. Ginny turned and gave him a look that read something like I’m not a baby, get your annoying hands off of me. She wasn’t sure he quite got the message, but he removed his hand anyway.

“We are only here until dad gives us the all clear to go back home. I will clear out all of our things we left in your spare rooms. Your favorite Weasley can update you on what has happened in the last 24 hours.” Ginny turned, not even sparing a glance at Percy to see his reaction to the news that he would be the one updating the family about Fred’s death. She crossed over the sphinx rug and stormed up the stairs, making sure to leave dirty footprints with each step.

Her room was first. Her trunk sat in the middle of the floor, a few articles of clothing scattered across the floor, but mostly still packed. She didn’t want to admit it to her mum at the time, but she kept her trunk packed in case they needed to make another quick escape. Now, it seems so frivolous caring about her things when her family is now forever torn apart.

She quickly gathered her clothes strewn around and shoved them into her trunk. Levitating her trunk out the bedroom door and into the hallway.

The Ministry of Magic has more to worry about at the moment than some underage magic.

Her parent’s room was next. Unlike Ginny, they did not have their trunks already packed from school, so they did not bring much from the Burrow. Ginny noticed this on her third day at her aunt’s house when her mum had not changed robes. Looking around the room, Ginny gathered what little items were there and put them into her own trunk.

The twin’s room was last.

Ginny took a deep breath, bracing herself before pushing the door open slowly. Unsurprisingly, the room was a mess. Weasley Wizard Wheezes products piled in boxes on the floor and stacked on top of the bed. Mail in orders haphazardly organized in some system that only made sense to George. In the corner was Fred’s belongings frozen in time, never to be touched by him again.

Flashbacks to the Great Hall flooded her brain.

The smell of burning smoke clogged her nose. Seamus guided her back inside from the courtyard into the entryway of the Great Hall. Everything was too quiet. The emeralds littered on the floor cracked under her step, echoing against the stone walls. Suddenly Bill was there, pulling her from Seamus into his arms. He was crying. Why was he crying? He led her to the middle of the Great Hall where her family was huddled together. She counted the amount of heads, realizing two were missing. Slowly she approached her mum, who was kneeling on the ground in front of - NO.

Ginny stumbled, tripping over a box of sparklers on the ground. Her knees crashed into the footboard of the bed. A spare sparkler fizzled on the ground then ignited the entire box. An impressive explosion lit up the entire room, burning an imprint on the ceiling. Smoke filled her lungs. Spluttering, Ginny sunk to the ground, trying to catch her breath.

Breathe in. Breathe out. In and out. Quicker. Faster.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

She felt herself start to hyperventilate. Her throat clogged up, unable to suck in deep enough breath to fill her lungs with oxygen. Tears blurred her vision. Pressure built in her head, she felt like she was submerged underwater. Unable to catch her breath. Drowning in her tears.

Arms wrapped around her, pulling her close. For a second, she thought she was with Bill back in the Great Hall again before realizing that was not the brother holding her.

“It’s alright, Ginny,” Percy soothed her.

Sobs wracked her body. She was exhausted. She could not keep them in any longer. Tucking her head into Percy’s chest, Ginny cried for her brother. She would never hear Fred tell another joke or have a late night race on the brooms. Her whole body ached. Several hours after his death, she finally felt the magnitude of the loss of Fred.

Percy scratched her back, lightly tracing his fingertips down her spine, soothing her. Just like he had the time she broke down during their trip to Egypt. Slowly, oxygen inflated her lungs and her sobs lessened. Her breath slowed back to a stable rate.

"Thanks, Perce," Ginny said when she finally trusted her own voice.

"Don't mention it," he shrugged. "How about you get some rest, I will clean up the rest of this room."

Ginny was too tired to protest. Pulling herself to stand, Ginny nodded at Percy before slowly making her way back to her guest bedroom. She didn't even bother changing into fresh clothes before crawling into bed. Curled into a ball, she pulled the covers tightly around her.

Her thoughts drifted to the same person she dreamt about for the entire year before the blackness wrapped around her, pulling her into a deep sleep.

Hours too soon she was gently shook awake. Groggy eyes opened to her father smiling down at her. He aged so much within the last year. What red was once in his hair has turned primarily gray, fresh wrinkles were etched into his face. Ginny flung her arms around his neck.

“It’s safe to go home now.”

“Where’s Percy?” Ginny asked, hating how childish her voice sounded.

Her dad stroked her hair, “Already home. Let’s join him.”

Her dad grabbed the trunk on the ground and Ginny’s hand, side-apparating her to the Burrow. Teaching the sixth years how to apparate was not a priority this past year. Just another flaw in her education from the last 9 months. Her landing was not soft. Stumbling a few steps, Ginny stood at the top of the hill, just inside the ward line.

“Everyone else is inside,” her dad said.

Stumbling over herself, Ginny ran down the hill to her home. At first glance, the Burrow looked the same as the day she left it. But as she got closer to the front door, she noticed more things amiss. The treeline looked different like a few branches were knocked away. The grass was scorched yellow like someone burned it. Windows were cracked or blasted open with missing shards of glass.

The front door groaned open with her push. Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat together, heads bent down, all snapped up at the sound of her entering the kitchen.

“Ginny!” Hermione smiled, standing to embrace her in a hug.

Ginny squeezed her friend back. She didn’t get to appreciate seeing the three of them at Hogwarts. Hermione was much thinner than the last time she saw her. They all were.

Ron embraced her next, giving her a pat on the back. She let go and looked over at the end of the table where Harry now stood.

“Hi,” Harry said.

He looked good. Thin like the other two, but still handsome. He had somehow gotten taller over the last year, his hair long, messier than she had ever seen it. The dark rings around his eyes and his hollow cheeks emphasized his green eyes. Staring at her the same way he had a year ago, like he was staring into a brilliant light.

Her heart skipped a beat.

But in the next heartbeat, they were crossing the room to one another. His arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders, hers around his waist. Pulling each other close. She pressed her ear against his chest.

He's alive, heart is beating, lungs are expanding with each breath.

Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive.

The stairs creaked, alerting them to the presence of another Weasley member. Ginny pulled back from Harry just slightly, not completely breaking contact, as George entered the room. Slowly, he crossed the room, giving Ginny a quick pat on the head before leaving out the back door. Reality sunk back in as she watched the back of George’s head.

Fred's dead.

Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead.

She felt her throat start to clog again. The unbearable feeling of loss started to overwhelm her. Slowly, she pulled away from Harry. She could not lose it again, especially not in front of the others who went through so much more than she had. Ron also lost Fred, and he wasn’t breaking down at the sight of George.

And George, who would see Fred’s face whenever he looked in the mirror, did not deserve Ginny breaking down by looking at him. It made her feel like an awful person for almost losing it. No one needed the stress of taking care of her while they too were struggling.

“He hasn’t said anything,” Ron said, filling the silence. Ginny realized her eyes had not left the back door George exited. “Charlie went back to Hogwarts to convince him to leave. He got back maybe 20 minutes before you did.”

Ginny wouldn’t know what to say either when everyone looked at you like they were seeing a ghost.

“Where’s everyone else?” Ginny asked.

Ron nodded to the back door. “Bill and Fleur are out back. They checked the house for curses, but haven’t finished the rest of the property.” He pointed to the stairs next. “Mum’s up in her room. I imagine now that dad is back, she will spend the rest of the day in the kitchen. She shares her love through food, you know. And I think she has a lot of love she will want to share.”

Ron’s prediction that Molly Weasley would cook a feast for dinner was not far off. A few hours later, everyone was crammed at the table, along with enough food to feed them for days. Harry sat next to her with a plate stacked full. Throughout their meal, they exchanged casual brushes and quick glances.

“What are Kingsley’s plans with the Ministry?” Harry asked her dad as he passed the salad bowl to her.

“There is a lot to figure out. The Ministry was corrupted, that is no secret.” Percy kept his head down, avoiding the gaze of his father. Arthur took a bite of his chicken before continuing, “It is fair to assume there will be trials, but those probably won’t occur until later this summer. First, the physical damages of the war need to be fixed before the government can fix itself. Kingsley is working with Gawain to assess the damage first.”

“Do we know how many people lost their lives?” Bill asked.

Arthur shook his head. “It is unclear. There are still those unaccounted for in addition to those in critical care at Saint Mungos. But right now the number is at 43, not including Death Eaters.”

The clattering of silverware halted. Silence overcame the table as the magnitude of the battle overcame them.

“Excuse me,” Harry stood, tossing his fork on his half finished plate of food. He crossed the kitchen and made his way up the stairs, not bothering to look back at any of them.

Ron silently stood too, following Harry up. Hermione paused, eyes following Ron, but she stayed in her seat. “He will be fine,” Hermione reassured the table, not making eye contact with any direct member of the Weasley family as she spoke.

The table remained awkwardly quiet for the rest of the meal. Fleur spoke of Shell Cottage to fill the silence. Ginny excused herself to her room as soon as she felt appropriate to leave.

“I will be right back,” Hermione said as she passed Ginny’s bedroom door later that evening, two plates of food balanced on her arm.

Ginny nodded and continued to get ready for bed. By the time Hermione returned, Ginny had already tucked herself into bed, facing the wall. Hermione silently dressed for bed. “Goodnight, Ginny.”

Her circadian clock was off. Even though her entire body felt exhausted, Ginny lay awake staring up at the cracked ceiling of her own bedroom for hours. Sleeping at Muriel’s threw her off. In other circumstances, she would have taken this opportunity for a night flight. But she didn't feel safe flying alone tonight. Her mum would also be worried sick if she found out Ginny went out alone unsupervised in the middle of the night. Ginny did not need to be an added reason for her mother's stress right now.

So instead she shifted in her bed, trying to drift off to sleep. Counting Hermione's rhythmic breaths as she slept on the cot next to her bed.

One.

Two.

In.

Out.

Ginny tried to prevent her thoughts from drifting to anything depressing. No Fred, no Hogwarts, not even her childhood home. So instead she tried to make her mind go blank, to think of absolutely nothing besides the sound of Hermione’s breath.

Her counts of Hermione’s breaths quickened. “No, please no!”

“Hermione?” Ginny leaned over the edge to peer down at her friend. Her face was twisted in distress. The faded quilt was thrown off her body as she tossed and turned in her sleep. “It’s fake! Please stop!” a blood curdling, terrible scream escaped Hermione’s lips.

Hermione bolted straight up, eyes widened in fear, her hand reached for her right forearm. Ginny crawled out of her bed, squeezing next to Hermione on the cot. Tentatively, she reached out, stroking her back.

Hermione flinched away from her touch before finally relaxing. She tugged the sleeves of her jumper down her arms and pulled her knees into her chest. Ginny continued to try to provide comfort to her friend.

After a few minutes of silence, Hermione finally looked at her. “Sorry.”

Wrapping Hermione into an embrace, Ginny whispered, “You have no need to apologize. I wasn’t even asleep.”

Hermione hummed. “Bellatrix, well…” she trailed off, staring out the bedroom window. The quarter moon provided minimal light in Ginny’s bedroom, so Ginny could hardly make out the look on Hermione’s face. “Nevermind,” Hermione finished, pushing herself away from Ginny, standing. “I’m going to go sleep upstairs, so you can get some rest. Goodnight Ginny.”

She grabbed her wand and bolted out the door, leaving Ginny all alone.

Ginny sighed and crawled back into her own bed. She punched her lumpy pillow, trying to find a comfortable enough position to drift off to sleep. With Hermione gone, she lost her distraction from letting her mind run wild. Now, thoughts of Bellatrix infiltrated her head.

Chaos reigned. Flashes of lights of every color surrounded her. She fired off spells at any person still cowardly enough to hide their face behind a mask. Harry was dead, but Tom had not won. She would make sure of it. Ginny caught sight of her wild mane of black hair before she saw her face. Firing off a cascade of curses, each aimed for Tom’s right-hand woman, each somehow deflected with ease. Bellatrix gave her a wicked smile, and for a moment Ginny wondered if Bellatrix knew exactly who she was and why she was so distraught. Hermione and Luna joined her side to fight Bellatrix. A streak of green passed her head, and for a moment, Ginny thought she would finally be at peace.

All good judgment she made hours prior about not flying tonight was out the window. She needed out.

Shoving her feet in her trainers and grabbing a jumper to combat the cool May evening air, Ginny quickly slipped out of her bedroom. Taking the stairs two at a time, pushing open the backdoor, and sprinting the moment she stepped out into the night.

With no one to tend to it in over a month and Death Eaters to trample it to the ground, the orchard was a disaster. Apples littered the ground, the sweet fruit squashed underfoot. The burnt grass damp with dew.

The broom closet smelled musty. Thankfully, it appeared untouched. Ginny grabbed an old Cleansweep, swinging one leg over the handle in a fluid motion. Her feet firmly placed on the ground, inhaling the cold air, she pushed off into the dark sky.

The common phrase “It’s like riding a broom,” never fit so eloquently. Months away from the sky, and it is almost like she had never left. She pressed her chest closer to the handle to center her gravity, and she was soaring. Past the treeline and the top of her home, she flew lazy laps. Circling the property, spiraling in the open air.

Her lungs expanded with cold air, her heart kicked faster with adrenaline, and her mind forgot old haunts. She felt invincible. She felt alive.

Slowly, she looped closer to the ground.

She noticed his dark hair first.

Once she flew within earshot, Harry started to speak. “Imagine my surprise to be awoken in the middle of the night to the sound of your brother snogging.”

For the first time in days, Ginny smiled "I hope it wasn't with the picture of Aunt Muriel he keeps stashed under his pillow.”

A laugh escaped Harry’s lips. It was one of the most joyous sounds Ginny ever heard. "I think he finally has reason to dispose of that picture."

“Oh?” Ginny questioned, the tips of her toes grazing the grass as she hovered closer to him.

The corner of Harry’s mouth quirked up, “Your brother is snogging Hermione Granger.”

“When did that happen? Oh, you haven’t been stuck third wheeling them this entire time have you?” Ginny asked, sympathetically patting Harry’s arm.

Harry looked down at where Ginny was touching him, slowly moving his other hand up to give her fingers a gentle squeeze. Ginny sucked in a breath.

He shook his head, letting go of her hand, “They didn’t snog until yesterday.”

“But yesterday was the ba-”

“Exactly,” Harry said, interrupting her. “How long have you been out here?”

"I couldn’t sleep, and Hermione had a nightmare,” she said, shaking her head. “It was Bellatrix. That's all that I know."

A dark look crossed Harry’s features. "I can only imagine."

Ginny did not push further. It wasn't Harry’s secret to tell, nor was it her's to know.

Instead, she slid off the Cleansweep and took a seat next to him. Enough space to not touch, but enough to feel the electricity between them. The hairs on her arm stood straight up. All day, tension wrung between them. Each touch sparked every nerve in her body. For months, she dreamt about what she would do when she saw him again, and now she was too overwhelmed to act.

They sat in the silence, staring up at the stars. As each second ticked by, she became more and more unsure how to express how much she missed him. Harry shifted beside her, and Ginny braved a glance to peek over at him only to find his bright, green eyes focused on her.

He hesitated for only a moment before his signature look of determination swept across his features. A look found right before doing something brave and stupid.

And then he kissed her.

If Ginny thought it was easy to return to flying after time away, nothing compared to kissing Harry. The feel of his mouth slanted against hers felt like coming home. Nothing was more natural. An instinct. Just like the instinct of Harry’s hands to wind in her hair and hers to press against his chest.

No words were said aloud, but so much was shared within one kiss. They were always good at having silent conversations. A single look. A single touch. So many emotions and thoughts expressed between them in those moments.

His hands in her hair. I missed you.

Her hands wrapped around his waist. Please don’t go again.

Their lips pressed together. I need you.

Eventually they broke apart after what could have been several days. Ginny always lost track of time when Harry kissed her. Pulling away, Ginny let out an uncharacteristic giggle, relishing in the warmth of an alive Harry.

She shifted her weight, leaning against his side. Her head rest on his shoulder. His arms snaked around her waist. Slot against one another like no time had passed since those days spent by the lake.

That is where they stayed until daylight broke over the horizon.

Days were quiet. Planning funerals drained livelihood out of the Burrow. Ginny found herself helping where she could. Her mum was constantly cooking in the kitchen, so Ginny would help clean. She didn’t speak, she kept her thoughts to herself. When Harry was in the room, they moved like they were dancing. Never touching.

Nights were loud. Hermione would leave her room after everyone officially went to bed to join Ron in his. That was when Ginny would sneak out to fly. Harry would join her minutes later, some joke on his lips about Ron and Hermione and how he wished maybe they went back to fighting. Then they would fly together or sit and talk. Eventually, they would fall asleep under the stars pressed into each other's arms, waking just at the crack of dawn to sneak back into their respective bedrooms.

One bright morning, Ginny followed the scent of fresh breads and sweet sugar down to the kitchen. Her mum hunched over the oven, a faded floral apron tied loosely around her waist. Ginny would not be surprised if she barely missed her mum waking up to slave away in the kitchen right as her and Harry were sneaking back into their beds.

“Morning, mum,” Ginny said, giving her mum a squeeze around the waist.

“Good morning, dear,” her mum replied, leaning into her hug. “I would like you and Charlie to run some errands for me today.”

“Sure,” Ginny said, stealing a pastry from the counter. “What do you need?” She asked, mouth full of scone.

Her mum turned back to the oven to pull out a fresh pie. “I would love it if you could run some of these breads to some families for me. The Browns, the Deacons, and the Rivers. I believe Deacon’s daughter was in your year. Sophie was it?”

The scone in her mouth went stale. Bile rose, burning her throat on the way up. Ginny grabbed a napkin off the counter and spit out the mushed up pastry. “Yeah, Sophie,” Ginny’s voice wavered. She cleared the acid from her throat, pushing the sound of late night giggles about Hogwarts gossip out from her head. “I can do that for you. Where’s Charlie?”

After wrangling her second eldest brother from the yard, the pair apparated, Ginny tightly wrapping her hand around Charlie's arm, to the home of Ron’s ex girlfriend.

Ever the introvert, Charlie left her to do all the talking and condolences.

After giving her final sorrows to the Brown Family, Charlie grabbed her arm and apparated them to the small Wizarding village the Deacon’s lived.

Ginny stumbles forward as her feet crashed into the stepping stones of her dead dormmates home. Steadying herself, Ginny wondered if she would ever get used to apparition. Flying makes sense. Apparating does not.

Grabbing her brother’s arm, she turned him to face her, “Listen, let me do this house alone, yeah?”

Charlie gave her a look, questioning her judgment. “You know you aren’t of age and mum would slit my throat.”

“Please. She was my friend.”

Something in her eyes must have given enough reasoning to Charlie to let her go alone. “I will wait over at the shop across the street. Meet me there when you’re done.”

Ginny pulled him into a hug, wrapping her arms around his thick waist. Charlie was the closest of her siblings to her own height, so she could rest her chin on his shoulder during the embrace. “I won’t be too long.”

She turned away from her brother, the pie her mother gave her rest carefully on her arm. Steadying herself with a shaky breath, she knocked.

A moment passed. And then another. Ginny held her breath as she waited. Maybe she would not have to face them. Maybe she could set the pie down on the step and turn her back and run away from the grief inside the home. But before Ginny could follow her intrusive thoughts, the door opened to a beautiful woman with short auburn hair and laugh lines carved into her face even though she looked as though she had not had a reason to laugh in a long time.

“Hello, my name is Ginn-”

“Ginny come in,” Sophie’s mum invited her in, opening the door wider for Ginny to slip inside.

She shouldn’t be surprised that Mrs. Deacon knew who she was, a classmate of her daughters, a Weasley, a blood traitor whose family housed The Boy Who Lived for years. Ginny did not want to know what the exact reason was that Mrs. Deacon recognized her.

“My mum made this for you,” Ginny said, offering the baked pie that would never fill the Sophie-sized hole in her heart.

“Thank you, that is very sweet of her and sweet of you to drop it off.”

Sophie’s mum took the pie and set it on the kitchen counter filled with other condolence foods. Ginny felt nauseous at the sight.

Ginny sat on the gray loveseat and turned away from the sight and took in the room around her. Light cascaded in and reflected off of the framed photos on the cream wall to brighten the room. Photos of Sophie and her little brother, Samuel, were everywhere. Together with a woman, who must have been their grandmother, standing in Diagon Alley. Sophie singing in the frog choir with her hair tucked back in her signature butterfly clips. Sam tugging on a much younger Sophie’s hair and running away. All moments forever to cycle on repeat, but to never be updated again.

The bile that she swallowed that morning began to rise again.

“Would you like something to drink, dear?” Mrs. Deacon asked, pulling Ginny out of her reverie.

“No, thank you,” Ginny replied, even though she could probably use a glass of water or a shot of firewhiskey.

A grunt from the door leading to the hallway alerted Ginny of Mr. Deacon’s presence. He was a tall man, not as tall as her own father, but much wider. He worked for the Ministry’s Portkey Office. Sophie often boasted about all the places her father traveled for work, and Ginny could see it. A man like him did not belong behind a desk.

“Elric, this is Ginny. She is,” Mrs. Deacon paused, “She was one of Sophie’s classmates.”

Ginny stood to her feet, “Mr. Deacon, I am so sorry for your loss.”

Mr. Deacon waved his hand, his other rubbing his sternum like he too struggled with gastric reflux at the reminder of Sophie.

“I too am sorry for yours. I heard you lost a brother.”

The grief of losing Fred washed over her again like a wave that quickly retreated into a cool, cold nothing. “Yes, I did. Thank you.” Ginny sat back down on the couch. The Deacons sat across from her, gripping each other’s hands.

Silence swept over the room like a cloak. Thick, warm, and suffocating.

Ginny broke the silence first.

“Sophie was-,” Ginny paused, clearing her throat, “she was a beautiful soul. Her voice lit up the dorm room. She would sing under her breath and she studied and then belt songs in the shower. She was wicked at potions and brilliant at Gobstones. She was one of my best friends, and I am so sorry for your loss.”

The all too familiar prickling sensation behind her eyes grew. Rapidly blinking, trying to keep the tears at bay, because she had so much more to say. So she pressed on. “I was there,” Ginny said, looking up to meet Mrs. Deacon’s eye.

The scent of smoke encroached her olfactory system. The feel of Sophie’s manicured hand in her own haunted her skin.

Ginny ignored the memories and pressed on. “When You-Know-Who asked for a pause, I went out to the ground to help.” The words recover bodies left unsaid. “I saw her lying there. She was alive, and she was asking for you. She loved you so much.” The tears building in her eyes escaped, rolling steadily down her cheeks.

"They told us her body was recovered during The Silent Hour, but never by who," Mr. Deacon said, tears brimming his eyes. “Thank you, Ginny.”

The guilt bubbling in her gut was interrupted by footsteps bounding down the steps. Little, 12-year old, Samuel Deacon slid into the room.

“Ginny!” Samuel shouted, eyes filled with joy as though he were seeing a hero. And to him he probably was. She had not seen him in months. Thankfully, Samuel was long gone from Hogwarts during the battle, but the last time she saw him was forever ingrained in her brain. The memory seeped through her pores.

“Pain does not last forever,” Amycus Carrow said to a room full of scared students. “But the memory of it does.” He sauntered across the front of the entrance hall, each step deliberate to draw out the dramatics of what he was saying. Ginny guessed he got this schtick from Tom. “Which is why it makes such an excellent punishment. You remember the pain, so maybe next time you won’t misbehave.” He turned to face her, smiling like a Grindylow ready to to entangle their prey within their long fingers.

“Now can someone please tell me which illiterate idiot graffitied the walls?” Amycus’s voice echoes through the hall. Dozens of eyes stayed focused on the floor. “Was it you?” A finger pointing at a short Hufflepuff boy standing over in the corner. His eyes widened at being called out for a crime he never committed.

“No,” the boy stuttered.

“I don’t believe you,” Amycus sneered, clenching the collar of his cloak, dragging him out into the open. “What’s your name, boy?”

“Sa-Samuel,” the young boy managed to stutter out.

“Well, Sa-Samuel, I hope you remember to never misbehave again.” With those words, Amycus lifted his wand.

Quickly shoving her hand into her bag, fumbling around searching for the jar of paint stashed at the bottom. Her fingers found the cool glass and she yanked it out and threw it at Amycus’s feet.

He turned to meet her, and grinned. The Grindylow caught his prey. “I see I found the illiterate idiot.” He turned his wand to her face, “Crucio.”

“Sam, it is good to see you,” Ginny asked, voice overly pleasant.

To Ginny’s horror, Mrs. Deacon said, “Samuel has told me a lot about you.” She smiled too warmly at her. Like she wasn’t the reason Sam was not almost cursed in the first place. Like she wasn’t the last one to see her daughter alive. Like she deserved forgiveness.

Ginny’s stomach turned and threatened to spill out on their carpet. She needed to leave.

“Thank you so much for your hospitality. I do need to get going.”

Both of the Deacon’s stood immediately.

“Of course,” Mrs. Deacon said.

“Let me walk you out,” Mr. Deacon said.

So Ginny let herself be ushered out. She kept her mouth clamped shut. Afraid to vomit out words along with her guts.

As she reached the door, Mr. Deacon stopped her, “Sophie’s funeral is set on the thirteenth. We would love it if you could make it.”

Ginny couldn’t trust her words, so she nodded in agreement, and burst out the front door. As soon as the door closed, she broke out into a sprint, down to the corner shop where Charlie should be waiting for her.

He was leaning against the side wall, lazily smoking a cigarette.

"Take me home." Ginny said, walking past Charlie.

"But we have one more-"

"Take me home."

Charlie paused before grabbing her arm and spinning on his heel. They arrived in front of the Burrow a second later. Ginny sprinted to the broom shed. Grabbing the closest broom, not even checking whose it belongs to, Ginny kicked off of the ground.

She lapped the Burrow several times, streaking by as fast as the broom allowed her. Up in the air, she could blame her tears on the wind in her eyes instead of the guilt she felt in her heart.

That night, she did not fly.

Hermione snuck out of the room, but Ginny stayed in her bed. Waiting. A soft knock on the door alerted her of his presence. Her bed shifted from his added weight.

They avoided each other that day. Well really, Ginny avoided him and everyone else. Hiding in the sky, and when she was called inside by her mum, she hid in the kitchen. Charlie did not say anything to her, which was a blessing. Her mum did comment on the extra pie brought up, but a quick lie that the Rivers were not home avoided anymore questions.

Harry’s arms snuck around her waist, pulling her against his chest. She tucked herself under his chin as he pressed his nose into her hair. Her hair was still damp from the shower she took earlier that evening, but she knew Harry would not care. In fact, he probably preferred it. The scent of her shampoo freshly washed into her hair. It calmed him.

She wondered if he was struggling with what was going to happen tomorrow as much as she knew she would.

But she did not ask.

Slowly, his breaths evened as he fell asleep behind her. And Ginny fell shortly after.

All mornings have been quiet since the battle at the Burrow. But none compared to this one. Outside, the morning fog was thick and suffocating. Inside, so was the silence.

Weasley family members dressed in black to bury their loudest family member.

When it was time, her father led the family to the grave. Walking in a line to the apparition line on the edge of the Burrow property, and one-by-one apparating to Fred’s final destination. Ginny stood and watched as her loved ones disappeared with a pop. Her dad stood by her side and lifted his arm.

“Ready?”

No.

“Yes,” she said, gripping his arm.

The graveyard was busier than she expected. Her family is large, but so was Fred’s impact.

Old classmates of his, old teammates, old co-workers lined the chairs in the back. Professor McGonagall could be seen from her tall witch’s hat. Hagrid stood off to the side, already loudly sobbing. Ginny felt her tears join his.

She made her way to the front and sat in her seat nestled between Ron and George. The same small wizard that preached at Dumbledore’s funeral and Bill’s wedding stood in the front. A twisted thought crossed her mind about how busy that man is during this week.

And he talked in platitudes. He talked about his sacrifice, how he was a light in the family. But never really about Fred. Ginny wished she had taken the time to write something, then maybe Fred would have gotten the send off he deserved.

George gripped her hand near the end of the small wizard’s speech. “Are you ready to see some magic?”

Ginny grinned, a warmth spreading across her chest. “Always.”

George grinned back at her, reaching into his pocket, pulling out his wand. With a small flick of his wrist. A bang behind the gravestones went off.

Gasps wrang out from behind her. Aunt Muriel gave out a shriek of terror, as fireworks lit up the foggy sky.

Sparks flew above her, spelling out the initials F.W. And for the first time all week, Ginny was crying, but she was not upset by it.

After the funeral, the mood was much brighter, the fog outside lifted with the smoke of the fireworks, and Ginny could feel like she could breathe again.

Slowly, the crowd began to thin. Angelina grabbed George’s arm and loudly declared that they were going to the Leaky to celebrate Fred’s life and a group followed her. Bill, Charlie, and Fleur followed shortly after them. After a moment of contemplation, Percy followed suit.

Her mother gave her a kiss on the cheek before heading further into the graveyard to where her brothers lay. Her father followed a few steps behind her.

Ron and Hermione were still sitting in their seats. Their chairs were now pushed impossibly close together as Hermione almost sat on Ron’s lap with her head tucked against his chest, and Ron’s face pressed into her hair. Masking the tears that he was shedding.

Ginny steadily made her way up to Fred’s grave. Ash sprinkled the grass from the firework show. She lowered herself to the ground, sitting to the right of the gravestone.

“Hey, Forge,” Ginny murmured, closing her eyes and resting her head on the stone. “Miss you.”

Ginny slowly descended down the stairs, unsure exactly which one would creak under her step. She wasn’t sure who would be worse to alert of her late night excursion: her mother or her great aunt.

All she wanted to do was see them and not just take Bill’s word for it that they were safe. Luna. Dean. Hermione. Ron. And of course Harry. Mum nearly locked her in her bedroom when Ginny asked to go to Shell Cottage.

So now she was sneaking to the fireplace in the middle of the night to floo her way over to Shell Cottage. A task significantly less dangerous than any of the times she snuck out in the middle of the night this last year.

The third from the bottom step let out a loud groan.

“Shit.”

“Going somewhere?” A voice from the top of the stairs called down to her. Thankfully, it was the person who would most likely go with her on this adventure.

“I thought getting some nice fresh, saltwater air would be nice at this time of night. Want to come along?” Ginny asked, nodding her head to the living room.

Fred quickly descended the stairs, uncaring if he woke the entire house along the way.

"Is that the plan then? Run off to Shell Cottage without letting anyone know where you're going?"

"You know."

"I know because I caught you sneaking out," Fred retorted. "And when mum and dad wake in the morning and find your bed empty? What will you do after they chain you to your bed?"

Ginny rolled her eyes, "They won't tie me to the bed."

"No, probably not, but you won't be let out of their sight. And when the time comes when it is important for you to sneak out, you won't be able to."

"What do you mean?" Ginny asked, hating that she didn't understand.

"I'm saying, wait. Wait until something big. I will go with you then. Not when you're sneaking out to see your boyfriend."

"Ex-boyfriend."

"I didn't realize you were sneaking off to see Thomas. Don't let me stop you then," Fred teased.

"Oh, shove off," Ginny said, pushing his shoulder.

Heavy footsteps pulled her from her thoughts. Harry stood above her, head of messy hair blocking the sun. He held his hand out, an offer to help her up.

She took it, pulling herself up and into his arms in one fluid motion. He enveloped her in a hug, holding her tight against his chest. Ginny breathed in the scent of him. Woodsy and cool, like the morning air in the autumn.

Reluctantly, she detangled herself from him, keeping her hand intertwined in his. There they stood, hand in hand, staring down at Fred Weasley’s grave.

Fred Weasley

1/4/1978 - 2/5/1998

Mischief

Harry gave her fingers a squeeze before letting go. He bent down in front of Fred’s grave. He paused for a second, before pulling out his wand, waving it carefully. A bouquet of daisies appeared in the dirt. Fresh and white. Harry stood, reaching back for her hand, but refusing to look at her.

“Hermione and I went to my parent’s graves on Christmas. She did this,” Harry said, waving his hands at the flowers on the ground, “I thought Fred deserved some too.” He bent down and picked one from the ground, “Daisies mean new beginnings.”

He shifted his weight, "or at least that's what Hermione told me when she showed me how to do the spell."

Ginny’s gut twisted into a knot. "They're beautiful," was all she could muster out. She wasn't sure she wanted a new beginning. She wanted to start all over.

"For you," Harry said, handing her a single flower.

Ginny smiled and accepted the pity flower. Harry didn't believe in the pity flowers either, but it was thoughtful, so Ginny tucked it into her pocket.

When she got home later that night, she tossed it into her windowsill. With hope that maybe the rest of the summer improved from the beginning.

The next several days were spent in mourning. Traveling from funeral to funeral.

Colin’s funeral was hard because she spent 30 minutes before leaving being coached by Hermione on the intricacies of a muggle funeral. Obviously, no fireworks like Fred’s nor an ablaze casket like at Dumbledore’s. But instead a metal contraption that would slowly lower his wooden casket into the ground.

She sat near front on the side with Neville and Seamus on either side of her. Harry with Ron and Hermione in the back, trying to keep attention off of them as much as possible.

Ginny grieved for her friend. Her Herbology partner. The person who never tired answering her questions about the Muggle World. The same sinking feeling that ebbed and flowed in her since the battle came back. She was the reason why he lost half of his first year lying petrified in the hospital wing. Tom was the reason he lost the rest of his life.

Tonks and Remus’s funerals were next. Members of the Order carried both caskets. Kingsley had tears streaming down his face with Tonks’ casket on his shoulders. Her dad looked more tired than usual under the weight of Remus’s casket.

Only one other gravestone stood in the ground on the plot of land. Tonks’ final resting place lay next to the empty grave of her father whose body was never recovered.

In the last row sat Andromeda cradling a young Teddy Lupin. Remus showed her a picture of young Teddy when he visited the Weasley’s at Muriel’s place. Then, his hair was a bright orange. Now, it lacked any sign of vibrance, instead he wore Remus’s signature sandy hair.

Next to Andromeda sat Narcissa, poised, dressed head to toe in expensive black robes. Looking every bit out of place Ginny is sure she felt.

Harry did a double-take after he noticed her next to his godson. Ginny reached forward and laced her fingers with his, offering a squeeze of comfort. On the other side of Harry, Ron pulled Hermione closer to his body.

Instead of the small wizard, Kingsley stood in front of the graves and gave a speech about hope and love and loss. A personal story about Tonks catching a death eater by tripping on top of him was interrupted by wails coming from the back row.

Little Teddy’s uncontrollable sobs echoed in the cemetery. Andromeda tried shushing him to no avail. Narcissa stood, offering a hand, a moment passed before Andromeda passed over her grandson to her sister. Narcissa carried Teddy further away from the funeral and whispers of the guests.

“She has no right,” hissed Ron.

“It’s fine,” Harry replied, his leg bouncing, looking everything but fine.

Kingsley continued on with Teddy’s sobs quieted by distance. Ron kept anxiously looking over his shoulder back at Narcissa while Hermione stared straight forward. Harry leaned forward in his seat, releasing his grip on her hand.

Ginny, for her part, kept listening to Kingsley and silently wondered if she would ever fully understand what happened with those three last year.

The funeral ended with Kingsley and Gawain Robards casting golden sparks at the pair of caskets before they slowly descended into the ground.

Gradually, the crowd began to thin out. Narcissa carefully returned to her sister’s side off in the back, swaying back and forth, cradling a sleepy Teddy in her arms.

Harry stood and started to make his way back towards where his Godson was.

“Mr. Potter. May I have a word?” Gawain Robards asked.

Harry froze momentarily, and Ginny wondered if he was going to tell the Head Auror to fuck right off before he calmly nodded. Robards stuck out his hand, leading Harry away from the crowds, in the opposite direction of Narcissa Malfoy.

Ginny stood frozen next to Ron and Hermione, both just as conflicted as she felt on whether they should eavesdrop on Robards and Harry’s conversation or confront Mrs. Malfoy.

Her mum approached the Black sisters. Ginny snuck over to the back, Ron and Hermione following her closely, ready to witness whatever drama could unfold between Molly Weasley and Narcissa Malfoy. But instead of sharp words or curses shot from wands, her mum swept both Andy and Narcissa into a warm embrace

“I am so sorry about your sister,” Mum said, pulling away from the Black sisters.

Narcissa placed a hand on her mum’s arm, “We do anything to protect our children.” She gave Andromeda a curt nod and took a slender finger to brush Teddy’s cheek. “I won’t intrude any longer than I meant to. It was good to see you, Andy.”

With a pop, Narcissa disappeared.

Harry stormed by a few seconds later, Robards still standing where Harry left him, hand rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“Harry?” Hermione’s voice questioned.

“Later,” Harry shortly replied before apparating off, not even sparing Ginny a second glance.

Hermione sighed, turning to Ron. “Ready?” Ron gripped her hand and then both disappeared with another pop.

“Wanker,” Ginny muttered under her breath, “You were supposed to apparate me home.”

Kicking a rock on the ground, Ginny begrudgingly walked back to where her mother was now rocking Teddy.

On the thirteenth, Ginny dressed once again in black. Hermione and her traded their black robes so they were not wearing the exact same outfit to every funeral they attended. By the fourth day of funerals, Fleur was offering her wardrobe to them as well, altering her clothes to fit their bodies.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione attended every funeral, each of them feeling like they owed it to the witch or wizard who lost their life. Just yesterday, they attended the funeral of a Slytherin fifth year girl that none of them had even met. Ginny joined them most days. Harry side-along apparating her to the graveyard. Occasionally, other members of the D.A. would be in attendance and Ginny would stand next to them.

Harry planned on arriving right before the funeral started, but Ginny wanted to be there as early as possible. Hermione’s heels clicked as she walked down the Burrow steps into the kitchen. “Ready, Ginny?”

Together they apparated to a large wizarding cemetery. A place where thousands of purebloods were buried before. A place that currently had an unusually high amount of fresh mounds of dirt and 6 foot holes due to the significant amount of deaths during the war.

Ginny found her dormmates immediately. Jessica embracing Elise with Athena rubbing circles on her back. They all looked up as Ginny and Hermione approached the trio.

Jessica let go of Elise to engulf Ginny into a hug. "I am so sorry about Fred, Ginny."

"Thank you, Jess."

Jessica paused before wrapping Hermione in a hug as well.

Athena pulled something out of her pocket and placed it in Ginny’s hand.

"Here."

Opening her palm, Ginny felt that familiar tug of her gut. In her hand was a green butterfly clip, similar to the ones Sophie often donned in her hair. Looking up, she saw her roommates all had one clipped in their hair as well.

"Thank you," Ginny choked out, clipping her loose strands back.

"Do you want to sit with us?" Athena asked Hermione.

Hermione shook her head, "Thank you for the invite, but Ron and Harry should be arriving soon. I will sit with them in the back. You four should sit together."

Hermione gave Ginny’s shoulder a squeeze before walking to the back row of chairs.

The funeral started not too long later. Ginny pressed between Athena and Elise near the front. The four dormmates held hands the entire time, offering gentle squeezes of support to one another as they buried their friend. Little Samuel Deacon sobbed throughout the entire procession, and Ginny wished nothing more than him to have his sister back.

Ginny stayed back after the funeral to watch Harry approach the Deacon family. It was something he did after every burial, apologize to the family. Ginny wished Harry understood that Sophie’s death was not his fault.

Samuel turned away from his parents and gave her a small wave. Ginny lifted her hand, but turned away. The nausea associated with Sophie was churning in her stomach once again.

That night, with her back pressed against Harry’s chest and one of his arms draped across her churning stomach, she lay frozen still.

"You okay?" Harry murmured in her ear.

She wasn't, but she couldn't admit that secret out loud. Especially to the person who carried so much more guilt than she could even begin to imagine. So she lied.

"I'm fine."

Harry had no reason to believe her lie, since it was his favorite lie to tell too. But he pretended for her, pulling her closer to his chest, pressing his lips to the back of her skull.

Not shortly after, his breaths evened out as he was lulled to sleep. Ginny’s brain was ignited on fire, keeping her awake.

“I know, it’s going to be alright,” Ginny lied. Sophie continued to whimper in pain. Ginny could only bear to look at her face, scared of what the rest of her crushed body may look like.

“I want to go home,” Sophie cried out, tears leaking down her face. Ginny felt tears well up in her eyes too.

A sound from behind her drew her away from her dying friend. Ginny couldn’t see anyone, but something in her wanted to get up and follow.

Sophie’s weak cough drew her back in. Blood tinged on her lips, her face losing color as each second passed. “Will you stay with me until I go?” Sophie asked, her voice childlike. She is just a child, Ginny realized. At 17 years old, there was so much Sophie never experienced. So many people Sophie was leaving behind. Ginny’s gut flipped realizing this is why her own mother wanted her to stay hidden.

“Of course,” Ginny choked out.

Sophie’s fingers managed to find Ginny’s. “It’s okay, Gin. You were one of my best of friends.”

Ginny snapped herself out of the memory. Harry still wrapped tightly around her, his heat radiating off his body suffocating her. She wrestled herself out from underneath him, desperately trying to not wake him. She needed fresh air.

Barefoot in the grass, Ginny padded to the paddock and grabbed her broom. She took flight and hoped the night air could cool the fire she felt in her brain.

As the sun began to crack streaks of light in the sky, Ginny crept back into her bedroom. Harry softly snored in her sheets. Ginny smiled as she slid back into his arms. She had been awake for nearly 24 hours, her brain was finally exhausted enough to finally fall asleep.

With no more funerals to attend, the rest of May trickled by. Everyone was stagnant with grief, finding it difficult to progress on. Charlie was growing restless, staying now at Shell Cottage with Bill and Fleur, but not feeling like he could abandon the family back in Romania just yet. Every time he mentioned the country, her mum would burst into tears.

Percy was just there. All the time. He and her dad would attend work, but then he would always come back to the Burrow instead of his own apartment.

Ginny sat with George most days. They had a quiet understanding that talking was the last thing either one of them wanted to do. A few days a week, they would go to Weasleys' Wizards Wheezes and organize the mess. Some days, Lee Jordan and Angelina Johnson would stop by and help up, filling in the silence with endless chatter. Other days, the pair would sit on the front counter, passing back and forth a bottle of butterbeer with the radio blasting Wizard Rock in the background.

Ron and Hermione were wrapped around each other at all times of the day. One couldn't even use the toilet without the other hovering nearby on the stairwell.

She had not seen Harry in days due to conflicting schedules. He would fall asleep in her bed after a long day of performing bullshit politics with Kingsley, and Ginny would join him after her nightly flight. When she finally rose in the late morning, his side of her bed would be cold.

Moments alone were rare, and those moments were spent exploring each other's bodies instead of exploring each other's thoughts. They were two vastly different novels only sharing a page with one another and then snapping the book shut before either one could read any further. So Ginny came to her own conclusions.

The burn marks on his thighs were fresh as though his escape dragon from Gringotts scorched him. The ribs she traced with finger in the dark told her that food was scarce. The lightning shaped scar on his chest told a horror story she didn't want to touch with a ten foot pole. The erythematous circle branded into his chest was the most confusing part of his story.

Ginny hated to think what conclusions Harry was drawing from her body.

On a cool evening in late May, Ginny decided to actually retire to bed at a reasonable time. The sky had opened into a massive thunderstorm which was not relenting any time soon. Harry and her had played a round of Exploding Snap earlier in the day to pass the time.

"Are you falling asleep with me tonight?" Harry asked, bare legs crossed on her bed, his hand propped behind his head. He looked so casual, like her bed was his own.

"Only if you promise not to snore tonight," Ginny teased.

A pillow flew at her face. Ginny snapped it from the air and threw it right back into Harry’s face. With glasses askew and a smile tugging at his lips, Harry reached out a hand to her.

She eagerly took it, being led to her own bed.

Ginny melted into Harry’s side, his hands immediately resting on her hips pulling her close. She tilted her chin to slot her lips against his.

This part was easy. Harry’s body was a map she had traced and memorized a year ago, and, during the quiet dark nights in her dorm room, she recited to herself.

His lips were soft and chapped. Teeth grazing her own lips, threatening to roughen her up with a bite or two. His chest pressed against her own. His hands, one always wrapped around a strand of her hair, tugging her whenever she pressed up against him just right. His strong thighs, one always slotted in between her legs.

That was the mantra she replayed in her head over and over while her fingers wandered down her skin last year.

But now, in the dark of her warm bedroom, it was Harry’s fingers trailing down her body.

“You’re perfect,” Harry murmured into her collarbone as she moaned his name.

Ginny came undone with the touch of his fingertips, her world bursting, once again, into a fire. Her insides ignited for Harry. She felt far from perfect, but with Harry she felt alive.

Her hands worked to remove his faded T-shirt, eager to return the favor. Fingers trailed down his chest, avoiding the new scars on his body. She wrapped her hand around his length and Harry’s breath hitched, a noise escaping his mouth that Ginny wanted to bottle up and savor forever. He never had to say anything to her ever again as long as he kept making that noise.

“Ginny,” Harry moaned, “I don’t think I will last much long-”

Ginny shut him up by capturing his mouth with her own. Teeth grazing his swollen lips. With a few more pumps, Harry shuddered about another moan that made Ginny’s toes curl.

Harry blinked his eyes open, green irises hidden behind his black pupils, staring hungerly at her. He pressed lazy kisses along her jawline, nose, forehead, before finally catching her lips. “You make me forget everything bad,” Harry sighed into her lips.

Ginny’s insides turned cold, the blazing heat evaporated and replaced by an icy tundra. She wasn’t sure why, Harry’s confession or the idea of forgetting, losing memories.

“Goodnight, Harry,” Ginny said, hoping to prevent any more confessions from slipping through his loose lips.

“Night, Gin” Harry replied softly.

Harry’s bare chest rose and fell with each breath, and Ginny wished nothing more than the ability to join him in unconsciousness. Her finger traced the lightning bolt on his chest, her own chest tightening with memories of that day. She thought she lost him. The final blow in a series of blows that kept hitting her over and over again that night.

With everything she lost, she had to keep taking steps. One at a time.

One breath in. One breath out.

Ginny glanced out her window. The rain had slowed to a trickle. The blooming daisy sitting in the window sill caught her eye. She bolted up from her bed, grabbing the flower on her way out the door.

The orchard was still a mess. Her mum had removed the destroyed flowers, but all that was left was upturned earth. Falling to her hands and knees, Ginny dug in the soil. A wand would have made it easier, but she did not want easy.

Taking a step back and admiring her work, the daisy Harry had given her now rooted in the soil of the orchard. Alone. With a promise of growth.

To new beginnings.

The best and worst day of June (chapter 2)

If May trickled slowly like the water on the River Styx, June crashed in like a tsunami under Poseidon's rage.

The back door slammed close after George drunkenly stumbly out

Maps of Australia and pictures of the brain were pinned up on her walls. Gwenog Jones’s face was covered by a colorful poster highlighting the anatomy of the brain.

“Do you need any help?” Ginny asked.

Hermione tutted, wrapping her hair into a bun and sticking her want through it. “I wouldn’t mind a fresh pair of eyes. Thanks.”

Ginny picked up one of the massive textbook with a brain on the cover Charms of the Central Nervous System: Don’t be Nervous! Opening to the back glossary, Ginny scanned the O’s until she found what she was looking for.

Peering over her shoulder, Hermione said “I didn’t obliviate my parents’ memories. I blocked them.”

“What’s the difference?”

Hermione stood from the bed and walked over to the brain poster covering Gwenog’s face. “Obliviation destroys old memories. Burns them. That is why Gilderoy Lockhart will never fully recover because so much of his brain was destroyed. If little bits are taken then there is some neuroplasticity and ability to regenerate what was missing, but if I took 17 years of my parents' lives from them, I would never be able to get that back.” She paused, staring off into the distance, as though she was realizing the challenge she could be facing instead.

Shaking her head, Hermione continued. “So instead of taking away their memories, I hid them behind a wall.”

“The hippocampus stores memories,” Hermione said, pointing to a part of the brain that looked nothing like a seahorse. “So that is where my parents’ memories are being blocked. I just put their old memories behind a wall and put new memories in front of that wall.”

“There has not been a whole lot of research, but in theory, worst case scenario, if I remove their new memories too quickly, I could cause their brain to blow.”

“I’m sorry what?”

“Not like pew pew,” Hermione said, mimicking an explosion. “More like, their brains would swell to fill in the space of the memories that I took back. Which could cause their brain to expand and possibly herniate causing a stroke."

She mindlessly flipped through the pages of the textbook, hoping something would give her hints about memory and memory loss.

Ginny drops comments every now and then about memory loss

She is not very happy that Hermione took her parents memories

“What are you planning on telling your parents when you see them?”

“That I am their daughter and I had to keep them safe.”

“Do you think they will understand?”

“From personal experience, amnesia and having your memories taken from you can be very traumatizing.”

“This is different from the diary, Ginny. I was trying to keep them safe.”

As we will find out in a later chapter, Ginny is not talking about the diary

"Are you going to go with them?" Ginny asks on a warm night.

"No, I don't fancy facing another Winter so soon," Harry replied

And there it was. A hint about what he had faced this past year, but neither one pushed forward. She could ask, and he might answer, but then he might ask the same of her. And that was something she did not want to answer. Some Gryffindor she is.

Harry tells her everything about the horcruxes and how we was one for the last 16 years of his life.

Ginny tells Harry very little about what she experienced this last year.

Hermione goes up to switch beds like they do every night and when Harry is lying next to her, she dreams about him. But when he talks she hears Tom. When she wakes and Harry is laying right next to her, she freaks the fuck out.

The next day she runs away to Lunas

Luna “I always liked being outside. Now I love it even more. It is open, and bright. I’m not a big fan of the dark right now.”

“If you want to talk about it, I will happily listen.”

“Ginny, you are such a good listener, but not a very good talker.”

“You should tell Ron that. He says I never shut up.”

“Oh no you talk, you just don’t talk about what is bothering you. You ask questions about me or how other people are doing, but when people ask how you are doing. You deflect. You talk about how Quidditch is going, or how your family is. But never you.

A few nights later, Harry joins her out flying, and that is when she admits that she is afraid that she was never in love with Harry, but she was attracted to the horcrux within him this entire time.

Harry has to put his big boy pants on and try to be emotionally mature hearing that from her. (Boy does not do a very good job, but at least he is trying)

He tries to get her to open up more about what happened to her and slowly we start to see some things

She picked up a strand of grass, carefully pulling it apart into two separate pieces. A simple distraction. "What do you know of last year?"

"Only what little Neville has told me."

"I'm sure what he told you paints the picture of what happened," she shrugged. She couldn't meet his gaze, she stared at the grass in her hand, delicately tying it into a knot. His hand reached for hers, fingers intertwining. He squeezed her hand gently, reassuringly. Offering support.

---

She is hiding. She doesn’t want to talk to Harry, or see her mum’s broken face. So she is hiding in the one place no one would look.

Laying on Fred’s bed, she could finally be alone.

***enter depressing thoughts here***

---

On June 22nd, she dreams of Tom. She always dreams of him on this day. Their anniversary of meeting face to face in a chamber meant to be a secret. She wants to ask Harry if he remembers, but she doesn't dare for the fear of what he might say.

I forgot.

Lucky you.

So she keeps this nightmare to herself just like she kept the past year to herself. She felt like she was slowly becoming a chamber full of secrets herself.

That night, with her back against Harry’s chest and one of his arms draped across her stomach, was the first time she felt brave all day. In the dark where he couldn’t see her face, when they were alone, unlikely to be overheard since the house was asleep. She finally muttered the truth that haunted her.

“I'm the reason Sophie's dead.”

The only indication that Harry heard her was the pause in his breath. Harry’s arm tightened, pulling her impossibly closer to his chest. And because he understands her perfectly, he does not suggest that she possibly could not be a murderer, he asks a different question.

“Why do you think so?”

She inhales slowly, calming down her nerves. “I left her on the courtyard. We were fighting together, Colin and Seamus were also there. Spells were flying everywhere, and I lost her in the crowd. There just was so much chaos. Then a death eater was in front of me, I think it was Avery, firing curse after curse at me,” Ginny paused, flashes of that night playing over and over in her mind. “I fired a reducto at the arch above his head and it collapsed on top of him. But it caused a lot more damage. It wasn’t much later that Voldemort called for a pause.

“After, well after, I went inside,” Ginny said, skipping over finding out about Fred’s death, “I went out to the courtyard to find survivors. To help. That is where I found her. Underneath the rubble that I caused.”

"You couldn’t have known.”

But Ginny felt like she should have known better. She knew innocent actions have consequences after surviving her first year

I've been down since July

In the cracks of light, I dreamed of you

The Great Depression

Pieces of her life were black. Dark and missing and forgotten. She had soared to unimaginable heights to try to find them, but every time she thought she heard a whisper of a memory, it turned into his voice mocking her, or worse, her own voice laughing at her.

Hermione and Ron come back from Australia

Hermione apologizes to Ginny because her mum cannot forgive her. Her dad had to play mediator in the argument.

Her parents are coming back to England eventually, but not yet. They wanted more time before returning home.

Ron and Ginny conversation

"It's supposed to be easy. Harry and me. How it was before."

"What did you used to talk about."

"I tried prying once to know what he was up to with Dumbledore, but Harry not so subtly shut that down quickly. So we stuck to safe topics. Quidditch, O.W.L.s, how maroon definitely isn't your color."

Ron scowled.

Criminal Trials get announced for the Death Eaters and the date

A brown owl flew into the kitchen, dropping off the newest edition of the Daily Prophet on Hermione’s plate. She reached into her shorts pocket to trade a knut for the paper. Ron fed a small piece of his breakfast sausage to the owl as compensation as well. The owl gave a satisfied hoot before flapping its wings and flying out of the kitchen window.

Ginny pointed her fork at her brother. "Who was the person I suggested you snogged for practice?"

"Are you seriously asking me security questions right now?"

"The Ron Weasley I know would never voluntarily give up some of his breakfast."

Ron stabbed his fork in another piece of sausage, taking the whole thing in his mouth, "Yeah well I've matured."

"Oh! They released the dates for the trails!" Hermione shouted, interrupting them.

Ron looked away from her and turned back to his girlfriend. “When’s Malfoy’s?” He asked, kindly swallowing his food before asking.

The Carrow trials get announced for like August 13th, making sure that they are AFTER Ginny's birthday which makes her an adult, therefore, she is required to speak at them if they summon her as a witness

yeah this was done intentionally, fuck the ministry for forcing my girl to have to relive her trauma

Harry’s birthday

Ginny gets drunk at Harry’s party

I love you, ain't that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?

August slipped away

Ginny’s birthday

Carrow trials

Amycus was a man. He only understood pain in tears and in blood. He didn’t understand that to girls blood meant nothing more than washing their sheets that night before bed. He didn’t understand that girlhood was pain, or that tears could be shed from grief or laughter.

Alecto was a woman. She understood that trauma of girlhood because no matter how horrid she currently is, she was a victim of it too. She understood how to torture a young girl scared of her past. She knew how to weaponize memories, or the lack thereof, so that Ginny could continue to torture herself without Alecto lifting another finger.

Ginny turned to the other side of the courtroom where Amycus Carrow sat. His face emotionless, but his muddy eyes filled with glee, like her reliving her torture was *erotic* for him.

She felt her heart quicken. Calm down.

Breathe in and out.

"Her brother told me."

Her mind brought her back to the floor of the DADA classroom. Those same hungry brown eyes staring down at her, his wand still raised. Every one of her nerve endings felt like it was on fire, every synapse filled with ice. Her mind bounced from one area of her body to the next, unable to focus on what body system hurt the most. Amycus lowered his wand and sneered down at her, "I know Alecto makes you forget her detentions, but I want this one to be unforgettable."

The courtroom was silent. The judge leaned forward in his chair, "Can you please further explain, Miss Weasley?"

Breathe In.

Out.

In.

Out.

• So since I never actually wrote what happened to Ginny during her time with Alecto, I will tell you all now. Alecto would erase Ginny's memory after every detention. Often times, the detentions were tame, because the punishment was the fact that Ginny was slowly losing her mind and she felt like she was reliving her first year at Hogwarts. Alecto figured out that Ginny was the girl in the chamber (because how would people not know this information? like Ginny wrote her suicide note on the wall in red paint) and used that to torment her. Also tying in the fact that Amycus was still torturing my poor girl with the cruciatus curse, Ginny was going through it. And it is not like she could really tell anyone what was happening to her because she didn't know what was happening to her. She eventually pieced it together.

• The coming together of Harry and Ginny officially

You'll Have New Septembers

The epilogue where Harry sends Ginny off on the Hogwarts express

#graveyard fic #hinny #ginny weasley #i could just upload the first chapter.... but that also feels like a disservice to the rest of the fic #Spotify

28 notes · View notes

neomujinjja · 9 months ago

Text

Bite Me

Pairing: Vampire! Jay x Human! reader

Length: 1.43k words Genre: imagine, drama

Warnings: not edited, mentioning wanting to cry, feeling nervous, slight angst, mini argument, use of the words: hissing & snarled, insecure (or is he?) jay, the phrase 'kicked puppy', regret is brought up a lot, mention of killing people, jay's pov at the end, some long paragraphs (especially in jay's pov)

Synopsis: Your relationship with Jay has developed further, and you're sure that he's the one you want to be with for the rest of your life. Speaking of your life, you tell your vampire boyfriend to change you.

Note: This is continuation of 'Still a Monster' but this will still make a sense alone. I use underline italics for sarcasm and underline for emphasis. I wasn't expecting this ending, but the story had a mind of its own and we ended up here 😂

@kim2005bomi

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

"This was such a lovely dinner" you tell your boyfriend as he gathers up the dishes. "Thank you, Jay" you say as you gently pull him down for a kiss.

"Anything for you, baby" Jay said as the two of you separated. Today was the 5th anniversary of your relationship, still going strong despite Jay's worry that you leave after learning about his vampirism.

"I have one more gift for you". Your eyes sparkling as you thought about the surprise you had for the immortal man. He turned to look at you with his brows furrowed and a slight pout (one that he would deny having if you mentioned it).

"You didn't have to get me anything else. You've already given me a new necklace and watch".

"But I want to". Mummering under your breath, you added "it's more of gift for the both of us".

"What did you say?" Jay asked, looking up from the sink. You only smiled and shook your head in return. Taking his hands, you led the male towards the couch; similar to when you learned about his secret. Your heart was beating was fast as you grew more nervous and you were sure Jay could hear it. The vampire tighten his grip on your intertwined hands, as if to confirm that thought, before leaning in to peck your lips once again. Taking a deep breath, you decided to plainly tell him how you felt and your thought process.

"Jay," you stopped looking into his eyes and the love that you found in his made you want to burst into tears. "You're the love of my life and I want to have a forever with you. And I trust you so much which is why I want you to change me" you told him, trying to maintain eye contact but ultimately looking down to you conjoined hands. You were hoping that he felt the same way, that he wanted a forever with you the way that you did with him. Jay cleared his throat and pulled his hands away from yours. It was enough to make your desire to cry grow stronger.

"And what?! Turn you into a monster like I am?!" he hissed as he got up. "No way. There's no way I would willingly do that to you" Jay adamantly continued. He walked away, back into his kitchen and stood at his sink.

"Jay!" you cried out at his words. While you knew he was struggling with the things done in his past, you didn't think that he still saw himself as a monster. "I don't think of you that way, and I know you don't think of the rest of the boys like that" you said, walking up to him and pointing your finger into his chest. Jay snarled at the action and his fangs glimmered at you in warning. "And I know you wouldn't let me do something that I'll come to regret. So other than 𝑚̲𝑜̲𝑛̲𝑠̲𝑡̲𝑒̲𝑟̲ reasoning, what are you scared about?" you argued back, not backing down from the male, glaring into his eyes now opposite of earlier this evening. You weren't scared of Jay, he was only acting tough and trying to get you to drop the subject, he wouldn't actually hurt you.

"And that's why I'm not going to change you!" the male snapped but despite his demeanor, and proving your point, took a step back to create distance. You rolled your eyes in response as you put your hands onto your hips.

"What part of you being the love of my life, did you not hear?!"

"But that's only for now! What happens when you change your mind?" he screamed and it clicked for you why he was against the decision. He was scared, scared of being abandoned, scared of you leaving him.

"Jay, my love, did I leave when you told me a vampire?" you asked him, stopping to wait for his answer. The vampiric male only shook his head, not verbally responding to you. Jay's demeanor had changed dramatically, no longer acting aggressive. If it wasn't for the situation, you would liken him to a kicked puppy. "I've continued to stay by your side in these past five years. And I would hope that you're not, but hearing you say that makes me wonder if you're doubting the love I have for you" you continued before pausing. Turning away from the male, you let out a shaky sigh. "But either way, I wouldn't want to force you into something that you don't want to do". You walked away from Jay, heading towards the bathroom. You didn't want to leave him alone, for fear that you'd be confirming his fears, but you need a moment alone.

ꨄ︎

Jay crouched as he heard a door close, he wasn't sure where Y/N had gone. He leaned his forehead onto the cabinets, scrunching up his hands into fists. Jay banged his head on the door as the sound of muffled crying emerged from somewhere in the apartment. He hated when Y/N would cried, e̲s̲p̲e̲c̲i̲a̲l̲l̲y̲ n̲o̲w̲ when he was the reason behind it. The vampiric male understood Y/N's why, he wanted the same thing. Jay would love to have Y/N by his side for eternity, but this popped up from nowhere. He didn't want his partner to do something that they could come to regret. Jay stood up, abandoning the spot to find the room Y/N was in. Stopping at where the cries resonated from, he knocked at the bathroom door. "Babe, come out when you're ready to talk?" he told the other before walking off again. Jay sat in the couch, after the heated discussion, he wanted to give Y/N space.

ಇ

Jay turned his head around as the door screeched open. Y/N sniffled as they walked into the living room. He stood up but hesitated pulling them in a hug, despite his want to give comfort. Jay watched as they sat in the arm chair to the side, effectively creating some distance between the two of them. Y/N looked downcast, their head and shoulder curled into their chest. The human's hands gripping their elbows hidden in the jacket they were wearing. "Baby.." Jay trailed off as he stared at them, still standing in the same spot he'd froze in. The vampire cleared his throat before continuing and slowly settling onto his previous seat. "Baby, I just don't want you to regret anything. Changing means leaving a lot more behind than anything that you could gain in the immortal future. It means leaving your family, friends, the place you live; basically everything and everyone you know. I don't want for you to look at me with hatred for having changed you in 100 years" he explained to his partner. While Jay's dead heart had fluttered at the thought of Y/N being a vampire with him; he knew they didn't know everything they would be getting into. Jay stills feels guilt from killing innocent people, but he also hated watching his family age and grow from afar. It was torture, one he wouldn't wish on his worst enemy let alone his lover. "You would never be able to return to the life that you have now. Your family would mourn you with a funeral, the people who care about you will cry over your death. You'd outgrow not only your parents, but your siblings and their children. You'd never get to see them up close again; who knows if you'd ever get to see them the way you know them again. Changing you means changing every aspect of your life" Jay pointed out further to the downtrodden Y/N. They had looked up from their lap, Jay could now see how red rimmed eyes and tear-stained cheeks. They let out a whimper at the immortal's words. It was obvious they hadn't realized exactly the full extent they would be giving up in exchange for eternal life. Jay held out his hand in comfort, leaning towards the other's direction, he was surprised by the hand that overlapped his. He squeezed it as much as he possibly could without hurting Y/N. "But i̲f̲ in a year, you still want to be with me like that. Then we can talk about me biting you more, but for now think about it" the vampire let the human know. Jay knew he couldn't ignore Y/N's wishes and words either. So if they really wanted to become a vampire to continue being with him then he'd make that possible, but only after a fully informed decision.

#kpop #kpop x reader #kpop x gender neutral reader #kpop x poc reader #kpop imagines #enhypen jay park #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen jay #enhypen #jay park x reader #jay x reader #jay park #enhypen jay imagines

88 notes · View notes

vigolicious · 11 days ago

Text

helaena targaryen x g!p sister reader with a little bit of alicent x g!p reader at the end

warning: targincest.

y/n pov:

i woke up because of the sunlight shining at my face, and i felt a body cuddling closer to my body. I opened my eyes and i saw helaena, pressing her face in my neck, her hair slighty messy but nonetheless she looks beautiful. Her body is covered in my sheets and she's on top of me, but i felt that my cock is inside her, then i thrust upwards gently then pull my cock out of her sweet pussy.

i got up, making sure not to wake her up then laid her on her back, then i positioned my face between her legs, sniffs her pussy, opened it to see the pink color and saw my seed leaking out of her flower. I fingered her with my index finger then scooped up my seed then tasted it, opened my mouth then dragged my tounge at her clit to tease her while fingering her, then i put my tounge in her pussy to taste our combined seeds. I felt my cock getting hard so i tongue fucking her then positioned my tip at her entrance.

I spit a little bit of saliva at my tip to lubricate it then played her clit with my tip, i then kissed her to wake her up, she kissed back while moaning and letting her hands roam at my silver locks, we stopped kissing because of air then she looked at me while biting her bottom lip, i put my thumb in her mouth to stop her from bruising her lip then i kissed her forehead, and pushed my tip inside her. She gasped then kissed me, i kissed her back then i pulled and push all my cock in her once then fuck her slow and hard, like hammering her pussy with all my might.

She is full on crying and moaning because of the pleasure and i kissed her to conceal her cries because every one is awake now. I was so busy fucking her that i didn't know that someone is entering my room, that someone is our mother, queen alicent hightower. I was busy giving helaena her climax when i heard a scream behind me, i turned around then i saw my mother standing there gaping at the sight, i was gonna stop but when i looked at helaena, her face being half asleep and filled with pleasure, i continued to fuck her, "AHH sister don't stop im cumming!" She moaned while i was still looking at our mother, she was looking at our conjoined sexes then i looked at helaena then i kissed her forehead. I felt a dip beside us, i looked and mother is sitting besides us watching then helaena whimpered and she cummed.

When she is done climaxing she looked at mother and cried " mother " while motioning for mother to come closer, mother approached and hugged her while helaena is naked and my cock is inside her, i pulled my cock out and is standing tall and proud while facing them. "Helaena are you ok?" Mother cooed to helaena, "i'm ok mother just tired" helaena groggily said then fell asleep. Mother turn to me angrily "what have you done to my girl?" She shouted, "just making her mine" i said, then mother came close to slap me but she was slow i caught both her hands then gently pushed her against the wall with her front facing me, mother is tiny compared to me, she is looking at me abit fear in her eyes, holding her hands above her head with one hand the other is holding her face, my cock is standing proud and is red because i haven't cummed yet.

I pushed my tip in her dressed covered pussy slowly grinding it, she gasped looking at me her mouth gaping at me, i smirked then put my thumb in her mouth, "suck mother" mother is proccesing what to do. "Be a good girl and suck it" i said gently demanding her, she procceds to suck my thumb, my other hand holding her arms now in her waist while her arms are wrapped in my neck, she is sucking my thumb for a while in i pulled it away, then pushed her dress skirt upwards and put my cock between her tighs, i then thrushed at her thighs gently, mother gasp my hands on her face now, "you're such a good girl mother" i cooed then proceed to kissed her at her lips gently i pushed tip at her covered pussy hole, she moaned while we were kissing with tounge, pistoned away at her thighs when i felt my self cumming i pulled away then masturbated in front of her then cummed, my hand is full of my seed, i put my seed-filled hand in front of her, "swallow my seed" she swallowed it then cleaned my finger with her toungue "good girl" i said then kissed her.

The someone is knocking at my door, the queen fixed her attire, i just crawled in my bed to cuddle my helaena putting the blanket above our shoulders to conceal what we are doing then closed my eyes to sleep, "my queen, the kingis waiting for you at his chambers" a kingsguard said then i fell asleep.

A/n: been a while, maybe i'll write alicent in the future.

#g!p reader #helaena targaryen x g!p reader #alicent hightower x g!p reader #hotd x reader

18 notes · View notes

cinnamon-bunni · 23 days ago

Text

Day 20: Hot Cider

hiii here is my first (and only, sadly) fic for Obey Me Month!!! i meant to do other days, but alas, i never got around to finishing them;;; which is sad, because i was SO excited to write about them lol (one being about Lucifer being posessed by a ghost, and another of Simeon becoming a fallen angel with Raphael's POV of it happening).

this was also made for AI-less Whumptober! the prompts i had used for this fic were "Enemy to Caretaker" and “'if you weren’t around, I’d be long dead by now'”!

either way!! i really like this one, so i hope you all do as well!! please enjoy it!

read it on ao3! word count: 3.6k pairing: gen (Satan & Lucifer)

Satan should have considered things going awry since the beginning. But he was so sure that it wouldn't, that he was smart enough to avoid whatever accidents or disasters that could have appeared if he didn't follow the rules to a T, but here he was, so sick that he couldn't even leave his bed. He was an idiot.

It had been exactly five months since the Fall; since Lucifer and his brothers had arrived in the Devildom, since Diavolo invited them in, since they started to reside in the House of Lamentation. Five months since her death. The angelic sister to the brothers that he had memories of that weren't his own. It was obvious from the beginning that no one quite knew what to do with him, and Satan had felt the same way towards them. Rage pulses through his veins, leaving him to snap and growl at any of them that got to close—especially him. Lucifer. All of them were annoying in their own right, but it was something about the once great morning star that made him his vision go red and want to destroy everything around him.

Leviathan was an annoying, sniveling so-called demon, who swayed between being a wallflower and a weeping mess. Asmodeus loved to touch him and pretend like everything was fine, leaving Satan to fantasize about ripping off that cheery smile off his face. Mammon liked to flaunt power that he didn't have—proclaiming to be Satan's older brother when he wasn't, they weren't brothers—and tried to boss him around before getting scared by the feral power that Satan possessed. At least the twins left him alone, clearly more focused on sticking together like they were conjoined at the hip, licking their own wounds without much care for anyone else around them. And then there was Lucifer; the one who tried time after time to reign him in, not even batting an eye as threats ceaselessly flew out of Satan's mouth.

Satan hated him. He hated the memories he had, the pride that flowed in his blood, and that look in his eyes. Everyone looked at Satan like that, but it was different with Lucifer.

Satan at least wasn't alone on his hatred towards the eldest demon. Belphegor also hated Lucifer, and he knew it was because her death. Satan never touched that subject—he knew he wasn't allowed to. Thinking about her felt...weird. It was looking at her through a different lens, different pair of eyes. Satan hated Lucifer for that, too. Subjecting that too him. Making him remember things he wasn't even there for. For simply bringing him to existence.

Sometimes it was the smaller things that made Satan blow up, though. The last five months had been the same, sans the hesitance of everyone around him. Granted, they do still sometimes chain him down at times, when his temper takes over and he's "too far gone" in their opinion, but they didn't stare at him with bewilderment as much.

(Lucifer still stared, though. He was going to claw that demon's eyes out one of these days.)

Taking revenge on someone was something Satan started to do after he watched Belphegor do it. He didn't know what had started it, but apparently Belphegor had done something to the soap used for their dishwasher, leaving a huge mess of suds.

"That's what you get," Belphegor had sneered at Mammon, the one who had accidentally started it. It had left the dishwasher broken, leaving the rest of them having to hand-wash everything from then on, but Satan didn't stay mad at long. His mind lingered on those words that the youngest said to his brother.

(Maybe one of these days, Satan could say it to Lucifer, for everything he'd done. Everything he hadn't done. For everything.)

After that incident, which would go down in history as the infamous "the soapsuds incident," Satan figured that he could do the same towards the Avatar of Pride. Why not? Lucifer was always denying Satan of something, always getting on his nerves, and was usually the reason he lost his cool in the first place. It was in Satan's right to get back at him, wasn't it?

Belphegor had done something childish, something simple. What if Satan went above and beyond, something better? Ruining someone’s day ought to be so much easier if it was done with a curse, right?

Satan wouldn’t say magic was his forte by any means, but books were his best friend. And with them came knowledge of sigils, summoning circles, curses, and the hypothetical of potion creating. He doubted he'd ever dabble in the latter, but curses? Curses could be made for just about anything: ranging causing true pain and suffering to your mortal enemy, causing them a terrible death; to feeling as though their hands are constantly covered in caked-up flour that they can't get off; even to just ensuring someone to have the hiccups for twenty-four hours. The possibilities were endless, and it certainly piqued Satan's interest.

Trying out curses, especially in secret, was hard. He stopped doing the secret part of it though, instead deciding to hide it as just a passing interesting if someone—Lucifer—asked about it. Satan was proud of the progress he had made in just the week alone, and after being unjustly denied a trip down to a cafe to relax and have some time to himself outside of the stuffy old House, he decided it was the perfect time to try out a simple curse on Lucifer.

Hard cut to Satan in bed, a fever wracking through his body, with his vision so bad he was practically seeing double. If only Lucifer was the one experiencing this.

The curse was a simple one to give a few symptoms that mimicked the common cold. A bit of a cough, maybe an annoying headache. Something that couldn't be traced back to Satan. So why was he the one to be the receiving end of a much worse version of it? What had he done wrong?

Lucifer probably would have done it correctly. The thought of that made Satan want to tear up one of his pillows, but had no strength to do so. Instead, he wallowed in misery.

(Lucifer wouldn't have royally fucked up, not like this.)

Satan didn't know what time it was. Hell, he wasn't even sure how much time had passed since he first woke up—it was hard to stay awake, much less think any coherent thoughts. His mind mainly lingered on his anger towards Lucifer; everything besides that was fuzzy at best.

There was a knock on his door. At least, Satan believed so. It was hard to hear, like trying to listen to a TV while being submerged underwater (another symptom to be tallied, if he were paying acute attention to it. Safe to say, Satan was not). He groaned at the noise that, quite possibility, didn't even exist in the first place. Time seemed to jump around and also never pass while he was miserable and unable to even able get a single word out. He wasn't able to keep track of how many seconds, minutes, or even hours had passed between every time he blinked.

If Satan strained his eyes to focus, then he could see a shadowy....thing. A humanoid-figure. Two of them, but he was pretty sure that was because of his double-vision. It was someone that hadn't been invited in, who decided to just barge in without Satan's permission. At the faint thought of the violation of his personal space, he growled.

Well, attempted to growl was probably more fitting. Because the second he tried to make a sound, a horrible cough left him instead, his scratchy throat leave him only in pain when he tried to put it into use.

The hovering figure above said something, and if Satan focused hard enough, he could hear the voice. What they were saying, he had no idea; the words could not be processed by his brain in a way that made sense to him. The only thing that stood out was the voice itself. Right as Satan connected that voice to a familiar face, a glove had was pressed onto his forehead.

Satan flinched away from the cool touch, and gave a proper growl this time—his throat hated him for it, but he swallowed down his coughs. No way in hell was this asshole here. But Lucifer continued to speak, more of something Satan couldn't understand. He wanted to yell at the Avatar of Pride to leave him alone, to mind his own damn business, but a soft croak came out in its stead.

Satan then settled on glaring as hard as he could, in hopes that maybe that would deter the demon before him. At first it had worked, or so Satan had thought. He was proud of it, being left alone in his room to lay in his sweat-soaked clothes, but then moments later Lucifer was back.

Something freezing cold was pushed against his lips. He kept his mouth shut tight and titled his head to the side to fight away whatever it was Lucifer was trying to do to him. There was more words that came from Lucifer, ones that Satan still didn't understand.

"Leave," was all he was able to croak out before it was followed by another coughing fit, worse than the last.

More cold, gloved hands were on him, grabbing and moving him like he was a lifeless doll. Not that he could fight it off, as much as Satan wanted to. His limbs felt like lead, and his head filled with fuzzballs. Next thing he knew, he was placed into a sitting position with his back against the headrest. It was cold just as everything else was, and Satan absentmindedly wished to be able to wrap a blanket around his body. Considering how he couldn't even bat Lucifer away from him, he doubted he could do a simple action such as that.

He shivered.

With squinted eyes, Satan watched as Lucifer moved close again, with something in his hand. Whatever it was, it was pressed against Satan's mouth once more, this time with more force to try and pry his lips open.

Satan, again, moved his head away to fight back. Something left Lucifer—a distinctive sigh of disappointment that would've made Satan smirk in triumph. If he had any energy he certainly would have, but right now he was panting like he had just competed in a triathlon just to be able to breathe properly. More talking, more of Satan not being able to understand. If anything, the more he strains his ears, the further away Lucifer sounded.

Which, fine by him. Anything to at least give the illusion that Lucifer of all demons wasn't right beside him.

The item Satan still wasn't able to identify was pressed onto his lips for a third time. Satan repeated the same action for a third time, unwilling to do a single thing Lucifer wanted him to do. He may be sick or cursed or sick via curse or whatever, but he wasn't going to go down easy for Lucifer to laugh at.

He was sure it would work again. And it did, to a point. But then Lucifer pinched his nostrils closed.

His eyes widened at the sudden inability to breathe. He was quick to open his mouth for air, and in lieu of it came a cold liquid. He choked and sputtered on it, the cool water—because it was water, Lucifer was trying to force-feed him water—suddenly turning burning hot the second it entered his throat. He spat out what he could, and with the container drawn away from him, the water quickly soaked deep into his clothes and sheets.

He wanted to yell, to scream at Lucifer. How dare he fucking try limit his breathing just to fucking do that to him? Who did he think he was? What, did he think forcing down gallons of water down his gullet would help? That Satan even wanted his help?

(Satan wanted nothing that Lucifer offered. He wanted nothing to do with the demon.)

Instead of saying any of that, Satan groaned and closed his eyes. He wanted to sleep. Never had his anger made him sleepy before, but he shouldn't be surprised. Right now he just wanted to rest.

There was more talking, something louder against the waves of fuzz that washed through his head. Lucifer should've just been happy that he stayed sitting up; it was probably uncomfortable to sleep on a water-soaked mattress. Satan took in deep breathes as he basked in the darkness, calming himself down. Maybe if he kept his eyes closed, he could pretend Lucifer wasn't even there.

Time passed. It didn't feel like much to Satan, but Lucifer's hand had grabbed onto his shoulder and shook him hard. He opened his eyes back only to glare, before closing them again with a softer groan. It hurt too much to speak. If he could, he would've said a lot of choice words to the older demon, but as of right now, all he could do was to try and drift to sleep.

Of course though, Lucifer wouldn't have that. Lucifer practically lived to deny Satan anything and everything. Something new was pressed against his mouth—really, Satan was getting tired of this bullshit—something warm, this time. Satan didn't have the energy to fight, despite the cursing that was going through his head. He couldn't bring himself to fight off Lucifer anymore.

This time, a warm, gentler liquid was poured into his mouth. It soothed the feeling his throat immensely, a pleased hum leaving Satan as he drank it. There was an aching pain as his throat muscles worked it down, but the soothing elements of the drink won that battle. The taste of it was familiar to Satan, though he couldn't place how. He racked his brain, but he was always brought back to the idea of rest. He kept his eyes closed, his head nodding off to one side. He didn't shake off the hand that fixed his matted hair despite how desperately he wanted to. All he could do was fall back asleep.

~~~

His mouth was full of cotton balls when he woke up. Not literally of course, but the fuzzy feeling there felt new and odd to him. He forced himself to sit up, his sore body protesting as he did so, and stared at the first thing that caught his attention. The more his mind cleared the louder it got in its confusion and protests at the sight that sat beside his bed.

Lucifer was there, seated in a chair that was probably drawn up from the common room, with his head tilted down, eyes closed, and arms crossed. Suddenly, at the clear sight of him there, everything flooded back to him; the in-and-out state he had been in yesterday—or perhaps it had been earlier that day, Satan couldn't remember—where he had been drifting in and out of sleep, before Lucifer had come in to try and help.

Why it had to be Lucifer, Satan didn't know. His grip on his blankets tightened. If had been Beelzebub or Belphegor, or even Mammon, Satan wouldn't have minded as much. But no, it was Lucifer; the demon he despised with every fiber of his being, the demon who taunted and smirked at him whenever he won, whenever he cracked into Satan's own pride bit-by-bit.

(Lucifer would never let him down after this, would he? Satan wanted to kill him at the thought.)

The curse should have worked dammit. Why had it backfired? What had Satan done wrong? He followed everything down to the letter, so why had it hurt him that badly, and not who he had targeted.

Satan hastily grabbed his pillow, and threw it with as much strength he could muster at Lucifer. Which was a lot, despite his sickness just hours ago, because it was enough to almost knock Lucifer out of his chair. It didn't happen, which was a shame, really.

Lucifer's eyes snapped open and quickly landed onto Satan. A glare formed as Lucifer stated, "It appears that you're feeling better, then."

"Get out," Satan answered with. His voice was hoarse, his throat still not in the best condition, but he didn't care. A moment longer with him and Satan was going to go apeshit. "I don't want to even look at you right now."

"Now, is that what you say to someone who saved your life?" And there it was: that smug aura that consumed everything around Lucifer. A cocky, shit-eating grin was on Lucifer's face as he continued. "You should be thankful, really."

"For what? For trying to suffocate me, or for trying to drown me?" He reached behind for another pillow; he tossed it at Lucifer with just as much strength as the last, but Lucifer caught it. Satan growled. "I don't have to say shit to you."

The fucking smirk didn't leave Lucifer's face. Satan wanted to claw it off. "Need I remind you what condition you were in? Or were you too out of it to realize the severity of the situation?"

"I didn't need you," Satan sneered. "I would've been fine."

Lucifer had the audacity to scoff—the sound made Satan bear his teeth. "If I wasn't around, you'd be long dead by now."

"Shut it," Satan hissed, "I don't care what you have to say. Get out of my room."

Lucifer shook his head. "How ungrateful," he muttered, and continued in a threateningly low voice, his glare sharp. "Do you even understand what was happening to you? That you were dying because of your actions? I saw the page you were on in that book of yours—it's an easy curse to mess up. Any mediocre caster would've made the same mistake as you did. And because of that, you almost died. You're severely lucky that I knew how to cure it. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be here right now. So don't go be disrespecting me like that, not after fixing something you caused."

Satan hated that his cheeks flushed, like he was a child being scolded by their parent. He wished he had more things to throw at him and his dumb face—or maybe the power to scratch and bite at Lucifer. That would be nice.

"Whatever," he spat, "just leave already. I don't need your fucking gloating ass in here. I get it, now go away."

Lucifer tsked, and sighed, "Very well." He raised from his chair with poise, dusting off invisible dirt as he did so. "I left the antidote for the curse in that mug. I mixed in some extra ingredients in order to make it go down easier. Drink it. Or don't. Your choice, really, but I'm sure you want to make sure that the curse is completely gone. Wouldn't want to go through that whole ordeal again, now do we?"

With one final flash of a smirk, Lucifer excused himself from the room. The second the door clicked close, Satan searched for a pillow; one was on the floor, the other left on the chair by Lucifer, so Satan instead balled up a blanket, pressed it against his face, and screamed.

Damn Lucifer and his arrogance. He wanted to kill him. The smirk wouldn't leave his head—that know-it-all look, that mightier-than-thou tone in his voice. He wanted to destroy it, to dig his nails into his face until it was a bloody mess.

He stopped screaming. He lowered the blanket a few seconds later, and stared at the conspicuous mug on the bedside table. He hated that his throat was sore, and hated even more that there was no water in sight, nothing other than the drink Lucifer had left as proof that he had won.

Satan leaned over to grab it. The mug was cold. He swished it around; the amber-colored liquid only filled up to a quarter of the mug, and was probably lukewarm. With an upset huff, Satan took a sip of it.

He recognized the taste; it was the same one that Lucifer had forced onto him earlier, the one that had actually went down. He wasn't able to identify the flavors then, but despite being cold, he was able to confidently name the drink this time.

It was apple cider. Hot, once, but now cold enough that it made Satan wince slightly at the worsened taste from being left out. Whatever the antidote was that Lucifer said he had used also messed with the flavor of it as well, leaving him dissatisfied with what once was a good cider. Unfortunately, he drank more of it. There wasn't much left of it anyway, and it helped soothed his throat. In seconds, he drank down the last few drops of it,

(Satan liked hot apple cider. He didn't think he's ever told anyone, though.)

Once he was done, he stared down into it for a moment. His grip on the mug was tight as he replayed the events of what had happened over and over again in his head. Losing to Lucifer, being bested by him by something so dumb as messing up a curse, the utter misery he had felt during those hours, and Lucifer's succeeding smile because he was just so fucking proud of himself for winning. He thought about Lucifer putting the antidote into a home-made apple cider so it would be palatable for him to drink.

The ceramic cracked a bit from his grip. Before it could completely break under his grip, Satan threw it at the door. Distantly, he acknowledged the shattering noise of the mug breaking into pieces, but as it did he buried his head into his blanket once more and screamed until his throat was bloody.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #omswd #obey me lucifer #obey me satan #obey me fic

14 notes · View notes

ngailibrary · 25 days ago

Text

you, me, only (2522 words) by kkomaism Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Persona 4 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Hanamura Yosuke/Narukami Yu, Hanamura Yosuke/Persona 4 Protagonist Characters: Narukami Yu, Hanamura Yosuke, Persona 4 Protagonist Additional Tags: Domestic Fluff, Getting Together, Kissing, Making Out, Post-Canon, POV Persona 4 Protagonist, Living Together Summary:

Love. Love. Love.

One word. One syllable to encompass something that seemed to be, to the rest of the world, the most important thing one could obtain.

Partner is also one word, technically speaking. But Yosuke says it like it's paragraphs of emotion, like he can pack an entire conversation into two syllables. In a way, it is. Partner is a word for the two of them. He is Yosuke's partner, and vice versa. They are conjoined, through that one word. A Venn diagram, where they overlap in a blur of lines and colours.

#yu narukami #p4 yosuke #persona 4 yosuke #yosuke hanamura #p4 #persona 4 #souyo

14 notes · View notes

emmangst · 1 year ago

Text

MAJOR TRIGGER WARNINGS!

⚠️ THE FOLLOWING ARTWORK INVOLVES BLOOD, HEAVY GORE AND ORGANS

IF YOU ARE TRIGGERED BY TOPICS OF THE AFOREMENTIONED WORDS, PLEASE CLICK OFF! Safety is the best policy!

still adding dots, please beware

bonus 1 : my search history for this artwork (biology and human anatomy is fun I prommy)

Ibispaint crashed when I drew the organs HEKLPPE

tumblr showed me @ingo-ingoing-ingone's ABYS october special, Keep Us Together As the Lights Go Dark, so verry, VERRRY late and I sketched this up rq after I read it with a brain that was half-awake.

During the sketch, I verrry much forgot that this was an ABYS spinoff and Emmet was a conjoined twin, so basically, that makes Ingo have situs inversus (genetic condition where your organs are mirrored) 😭

My guy is STRUGGLING to keep himself up

Without the screentones :

pov: you're a ghost and you're desperately trying to keep all your organs in one place as it always should be but your lower torso is missing

(i couldn't stop hearing Sisyphus' music whenever I read the fic and drew Emmet in this gruesome state)

#submas angst #tw gore #tw blood #tw organs #tw horror #← kind of #pokemon emmet #submas #agagsshgsghs I got sick for the 6th time again

64 notes · View notes

mystical-one · 7 months ago

Text

this is always such a jarring transition to me. POV you meet up with your best friend from school who you haven't seen in 10 years because you dropped out and moved away from the city while they chose to stay and finish school even though they hated it. And now they're studying english history or something and they've fully transitioned and just by looking at the edges of their face you can tell that they've long moved away from their comfortable home and have seen too much to recount over a single coffee. And when they wearily laugh into their cup it's all too clear that they're not in the best place at the moment but the fondness is still there and jokes you both crack are still the same and even though your situations are different you will always be conjoined at the soul

#emi's meandering jotts #bob dylan

36 notes · View notes

spacecatbowtie · 10 months ago

Text

I know why - path 3: Sweet/Switch Din

Interactive story (Path 3 of 3)

Base story | Path 1: Dom Din | Path 2: Dark Din | Path 3: Switch Din

After the base story, this is one of the endings. Dark Din.

Warnings: Explicit MDNI 18+

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈

Chapter word count: 4.4k

AO3

Tags: #Angst #Smut #Porn With Plot #Mando needs to work on his communications skills #unprotected p in v #Fingering #First POV #no mention of oc name #No use of y/n #I hate y/n #OC wants to be taken care of #OC wants to be independent #kinda forced proximity #Exhibitionism #Interactive #Daddy Dom Din Djarin #sweet din #switch Din

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈

I jerk my hand out of his grasp. "Don't pretend to have empathy all of a sudden.. bounty hunter." The words roll of my tongue like venom.

"I'm not pretending." The Mandalorian in front of me states.

"You have no regard for my feelings what so ever." He needs to feel what he made me feel in those increasing moments of uncertainty and denial. "I want to go. I can't stand to be near you anymore."

It is silent for a few seconds. As expected he gives as much of a reaction as with every other situation. none. I push past him, colliding with him, witch hurt me probably more than him. But that is not the point. Then I stop I my tracks as his strangled voice reaches me.

"I'm sorry..." It sounds as if it pains him to say it.

Slowly I turn to him. I should just walk away, I should leave.

With a sigh, his shoulders slack. "I'm sorry you thought I was pushing you away, which I really was, I see that now. But I don't want you away, and-" Another sigh, his helmet tips down, as if he does not have the courage to look into my eyes.

Since when did he talk so much? Baffled, I stare at him as he rambles on. My face softens. It is kind of endearing how he acts all uncertain now.

"Look the truth is, I don't want you hurt. Thats why I am hesitant to take you with me on jobs." The warmth of his grip that surrounds my hands and jaw disappears, and appears on both my shoulders instead. He cages me in again. But this time it's not invading. His helmet is still tilted down. Are his eyes closed? Is he looking down at the ground, or my feet, or wherever those eyes are.

I hope he is looking at some part of me.

The unexpected thought makes my cheeks glow warm.

Another sigh from him. "I think another reason I have been pushing you away, is because I know there is something that I know I want. But I know it won't work."

As if he wants to see every detail of my reaction, his visor snaps up at me, and I am still looking at him with wide eyes. I'm happy to notice that my mouth doesn't hang open.

"And I also don't let you come with me, because you distract me."

A nervous laugh that sounds more like a wheeze, is the first thing out of my mouth. "Are.. am.. How.. In what way do I distract you?"

The grip of his hands on my shoulders tighten slightly for a second, before he places them on my hips. "In what ways don't you..." His voice sounds horse and soft. "You always look so beautiful and precious. When you smile, I want to worship you-" His hand reaches up again and a thumb moves over my bottom lip. "When you cry I want to hold you. And when you look at me, it makes me want to..." He hesitates for a second. "Touch you."

This is not happening right now.

Surely, any moment now, I'll wake in my bunk alone and horny. It'll be like so many other times I had dreamt about him. He would always tease me with his voice and his hands, just as he is doing now. However, I would always wake up just before he'd touch me where I need him most.

His warmth disappears when he takes a step back. "I'm sorry. I did not want to put you on the spot like that."

I realize I have been zoning out, and staring through him while in my thoughts about him. "No, it is okay, I just did not expect this." I grab his hands to prevent him from moving further away from me, and he just looks at our conjoined hands. He stares I think. Softly he squeezes back and I smile softly at him. He is cute when he acts shy.

"Thank you for telling me, Mando." My hands let go of his, and slowly follow the shape of his arms, from the wrists until his biceps. They feel solid, and tense even more underneath my touch. I don't know where I get my sudden courage from, but I feel bold. It could just be the sexual frustration kicking in, or the fact that he basically admitted to feeling at least something for me. Whatever it is, I decide to take the next dangerous step. "But maybe-" From his arms, I move to touch his cowled neck and ultimately slide my hands down his chest to lean in close. "maybe, I like distracting you."

There is no reaction from him except the sudden quick intake of breath. Not that I expected him to say something. I suspected he was not very experienced with people in this way.

During the time I've been with him, he has never brought someone to his ship. I suspected that at least a few of the times that he was away, he was enjoying some company, paid or not. But now it appears that this might not have been the case. I think he distracts himself from the need for affection through his profession.

I can work with that.

Unmoving and patiently, he is still waiting for what happens next. I look up at him, my smile turning sly. "I really want to have sex with you right now."

He is so tense, that I can feel it radiating off him.

"Dank farrik." He breathes finally. And with that he envelops me in a tight hug, taking me off guard. "Girl, the things you do to me.."

I let out a laugh and return the hug. Relief floods me, he took that well, he is not revolted by me, like part of me feared. Perhaps he might even feel the same about me, as I do for him.

The distinctive smell of him fills my nose when I breathe in, face pressed against his body. It is a warm smell, like coming home after a long day. The leather scent makes my head feel light and tingly, my need for him builds. There has been enough waiting already. I take advantage of his distraction. Just as Mando had done to me before, I turn him around and shove him back against the wall. He is taken off guard, even though he is big and heavy, he is quite easy to manipulate. His back hits the rough stone, making the beskar on his shoulders cling with a metallic sound.

He does not have time to respond with a clever remark, because I drape against him once more. "Touch me, Mando." I guide one of his hands to my waist and one above my chest. This is near the places I want him to touch me, but I want him to take his time and not to rush him in something he may not be comfortable with yet. In the meantime, I step one leg in between his and stand close. with my upper thigh, I softly apply pressure against his crotch. The soft groan that he fails to hold in, is music to my ears.

I proceed to tease him with smooth motions of my leg. Through the movements , I feel him getting harder. Angling my hips I try to rut his thigh and receive some pressure where I need it. He catches on to what I want and places his foot a little forward, so his leg makes contact with the sweet spot between my legs.

"Use me to get off" He rasps while keeping his hands on the same places on my body as I had placed them. It is as if he is scared to do something out of line.

"You can touch me." I keep moving my core over the beskar piece on his thigh. "I want you to touch me."

Finally his hands come to life, slowly they creep over my body. One to cup my breast and one my butt. "You feel so good." There is a hint of wonder in his voice.

There are too many layers. I need to feel him, every part of him. Even though I can't see his face, I look up at him as I slide my hand down his chest. The visor is dark as ever, not showing a hint of emotion or humanity. It is the way he reacts to me, that I know there is a human underneath the many layers of him.

His breath hitches when I touch his erection through his pants and give him a few teasing taps there. A wicked smile spreads across my face. I can't help but bite my lip at the thought of touching him, the real him, the soft silky skin over the hard shaft that I know is there. With both hands, I open the fly of his pants and pull him out. Finally I touch him, a real part of him. Other than the times I helped him stitch up small gashes, or the time he took off his gloves, I have never seen any part of him.

Moving my fingers around him, I give a few experimental strokes, making him whimper. He out right whimpers with that low voice of his. Something inside me snaps. My pupils dilate and more wetness collects between my legs.

I take a step back and reluctantly he lets go when I release myself from our embrace. Keeping his hands in mine, I marvel at the fact that I can finally feel him. I need to feel him, now that I am finally able to.

Just as I am about to get on my knees to be able to taste him, he stops me with a hand on my arm. "Wait." Instead, he kneels down in front of me. On his way down he softly moves his hands over my thighs and legs, taking his time with feeling me. The gloved covered fingertips slide down the insides of my legs, down until he reaches the leather make-shift armour. Struggling with the laces, he unties the leather chin protection. Carefully he slides them off, followed by my boots.

Never had I thought he could be this gentle. Having him down on his knees in front of me feels strange. It makes me feel powerful, like I could take him on, even though I know I never could.

He gets up again, but I shake my head. "Sit down." My voice is hoarse.

His helmet tilts.

I nod my head at the ground. "Sit down against the wall."

At first I think he is not going to obey, but then he gets down, keeping his visor on me. He sits back against the wall. The heels of his boots leave a trail in the sand as he stretches his legs.

I hook my thumbs underneath the waistband of my pants. Keeping out of his reach, I slide them down slowly. The hands at his sides clench as he watches me. Grinning, I crouch down to straddle him, my legs at either side of his hips. My bare feet dig in the warm sand. Grabbing his length again I continue stroking him, slowly, with a tight grip.

softly, he caresses up and down my lower legs with shaking fingers.

Lifting my hips, I line him up to my entrance. "Do you want this?"

The hands on my thighs squeeze me, seemingly holding himself back from pushing me down on himself. He gives me a nod and a short groan.

"hmm? what's that?"

"I want you." He grunts out.

Dragging his tip up and down my heat, I make sure he is nice and wet. Stroking him, I spread the slick around his length.

He now actually pulls me down on his cock, making us both gasp as the head enters me. The stretch is already better than I had Imagined. I shudder, almost losing myself, but this is about him. I want to make him feel good, I want to give him everything. Everything I have thought about in secret, all the things I have dreamt about.

Moving my hips, I lower myself further on to him. My hands search for support on his shoulders, as he fills me completely.

His strong arms help me gently up and down his shaft, letting me fuck him slowly. The sensation of the ridge on his head spreading my walls feels overwhelming. My insides are cramped every time he fully settles inside me. The sounds he lets out make everything even better, his grunts and suppressed wheezes crackling through his modulator.

Placing a hand on the side of his helmet, I look at where I think his eyes should be. "I want to hear you, don't hold them in." I don't know where the confidence comes from to order something from him, but I feel like there is a part of him that wants to submit to me, even if it is just a bit.

I think he gives me a slight nod, but I could have imagined it. After I sink down on him again, with more force this time, the guttural grunt he lets out is orgasmic. Still I believe he suppresses the sound, but it is louder this time. Perhaps he is afraid others down the street will hear, or maybe he is just shy and does not trust me with this vulnerable side of him yet.

Focusing on the feeling of him inside me I become even more wet. "Oh, Kriff, you fill me so deep, Mando. You feel so good." His hips buck, and he starts moving with me, fucking up into me, still at a relatively slow pace.

"Hmm, you like dirty talk?" I tease him. I slide my hands down his sides where he is not covered in armour, feeling the hard muscle under a healthy layer of fat. Leaning closer, so I can whisper in the crook of his neck I continue. "Never expected this day to end like this. Me, on top of you, bouncing on your thick cock." my neck and cheeks glow hot from the words that spill out of me. Just like I never expected to fuck him, I never expected I could say things like this. I almost regret saying them, what if he laughs at me or does not like it?

Quickly my doubts are disproven when his head falls back against the stone wall, creating a hard clink sound. The hands on my hips tighten almost painfully as he pulls me faster up and down. "I needed to fuck you for so long, mesh'la." He grunts out between heavy breaths.

As I grow more excited, the wet sounds become louder in the silence of the dark alleyway. The fact of what he admitted makes my heart swell. But what if this is just something he says in the heat of the moment, and he does not mean it? I push the thought away and just focus on being present with him.

I pull at the heavy fabric of his cape and cowl. There are too many layers! finally I manage to expose enough of his skin to kiss and lick the part between his shoulder and neck. This is as close as I can get to kissing him, really kissing him. Oh, how I wish I could suck his bottom lip between my teeth and lick inside his mouth, to feel his kisses all over my body. But, this would have to do. His body jumps underneath me as my lips make contact with his skin, then he relaxes and twitches inside me, making me giggle. Who knew this Mandalorian could be so responsive and sensitive.

"Kriff, mesh'la, you are ruining me." He wraps his arms around me and pulls me flush to his chest. It feels like a hug, his body wrapped protectively around me, keeping me close, keeping me safe.

He plants his feet on the sandy ground, bending his knees so he has more leverage. Then he starts this pace of fucking me hard and deep, almost not pulling back at all before he plunges in again. His pubic bone rubs against my clit, causing sparks of electricity to shoot through me.

"Fuck, yes Mando! keep going!" My legs tense around him, squishing his hips as I drown in pleasure. I cling to him as if he is what is keeping me alive, this is not even far from the truth. At this moment he is the only thing for me in this world, his warmth, his smell, this man that is mine right now. I don't care that my bare knees scrape in the rough sand, or the cooling air on my skin. Mando is warm enough for the both of us, his body heat transferring through his beskar armour.

To my frustration he slows the pace down. "Wrap your legs around me, cyar'ika."

All these new words he is calling me, what do they mean? He speaks them almost like a prayer. I'm sure they have a deep significance.

"Come on." Taking my arms, he makes me wrap them around his neck. Still inside me, he stands up, his strong thighs almost having no trouble with lifting us both. I squeal and wrap my legs tighter around him.

Before I can ask him what he is doing, he turns around. One hand on my waist and the other behind the back of my head, he presses me against the wall. The hand makes sure I don't hit the wall too hard. This gesture makes me smile up at him. It causes a warm feeling to swirl in my stomach, it is different from the feeling of lust however. This is closer to what I felt since the moment my feelings for him started to develop. That time he pulled me out of harms way of a blaster bolt, or the time he brought me a sweet fruit cake after he returned from one of the jobs.

Holding me tightly against him, he ruts in to me again. Way to slow for my liking, but when I buck my hips to search for more friction he holds me still by my hips, forcing me to endure this slow teasing torture. I bet he is grinning under his helmet at my pathetic huff.

I have an Idea, and can't bite back the grin on my lips as I cross my ankles behind his back and pull him in. His hips shoot forward, entering me fast and hard. "Fuck me better, Mando. I've had enough of this slow game. I had thought you'd be rough with this."

"You feel too good. I want to last long for you."

A sense of guilt spikes my blood. It is too selfish of me to demand something. I am about to apologise when he speaks again.

"So you have been thinking about this? Me making love to you?"

My eyes widen. Did I just admit to that? And why did he use the words 'making love?' Is that just the way he calls this, or does this actually mean something to him, something more than just a one-time fuck. Could this be more?

"I- eh,"

"Don't worry, I'll give you more to think about." At this, the sluggish pace changes into something that is the complete opposite. He plunges into me, pushing further than I would have thought possible, pressing his hips against mine as far as they will go. Then he almost completely exits, only the tip of his cock inside, before slamming inside me again.

Now it's my turn for my head to fall back. Despite his previous care for me not to hit my head, it still hits the wall behind me as my eyes roll back. I think I am saying things, telling him how good it feels, but I have no control over my body, my words or my hearing for that matter. My eyes open to the evening sky, but they see nothing but bright colours as he fucks in to me, my brain being completely de-wired.

Strong fingers dig deeper in my thighs, my breaths are shallow as he presses his body into me, his smell filling my every breath. With every snap of his hips, his pubic bone grazes my clit perfectly. I am getting close. He must notice it too, maybe due to my trembling legs, or my moans that I had been able to suppress until now.

His helmet is gently placed to my forehead, his visor aimed at my face. I look at it, hopefully staring in his eyes as my orgasm rushes closer.

"You are doing so good, you are perfect." He rambles on. "Come for me, I want you to come around me."

The thought of him feeling me squeeze his length makes my mind run wild.

"You come first." I manage to grit through my teeth, not wanting him to have all the control. "Now."

The pace falters. He curses something in his own language, I think, because the syllables sound foreign to me as he grunts them out. "Where?" It almost sounds as if he is in pain.

"in- inside. It's safe." I hadn't even finished the first word when he starts to throb and continues a irregular pace, slowly fucking his cum deeper inside me.

After a few deep breaths he halts, hips flush to mine. "You didn't... Come." It sounds so sad that I almost regret ordering him to finish.

"Can still." I say breathless as he slowly softens inside me. "But don't pull out. Want to feel you inside me when I cum."

This draws a near whine from him. He readjusts me so he can hold me with one arm, keeping my body from the ground by pinning me tighter to the wall.

His gloved hand hovers in front of my face. "Take it off."

I don't need further explanation. I yank his glove off. Not as fast as I want, it gets stuck on some of his fingers. When the annoying layer of leather is finally removed, I stare at the slightly tinted skin. A broad palm, thick and long fingers. His hand is so big compared to mine, it makes me feel safe for some reason. I want this hand on my skin, I want it traveling up my thighs, worshipping me.

"Now I want to make you come." Slowly he places two fingers on my wet mound, making me jump at the sensitiveness of the nerves there.

His fingers part as he feels how my lips are spread to accommodate him. Even though he came, he is still half hard inside me.

I wrap my arms around his neck and bury my face against his collarbone, breathing him in. "Then do it."

The fingers press a little harder against my core, slowly circling, exploring me. His attentiveness causes me to become more wet. He notices and grunts, the rumble of it vibrates against my chest. "Beautiful." he murmurs while his fingertips move almost ticklish around my mound.

"Stop teasing!" I want to sound strict but it comes out as a pathetic whine.

"Srry ma'am." He hums. His fingers applying more pressure and slipping through the slick with ease.

I dig my nose in the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent. The hot smell is like an aphrodisiac, sending a tingling sensation through my body.

The warmth of his skin, mixed with the structure of his fingerprints on my sensitive clit sends me soaring. I am flying, the fire burning hot as my body tenses and bucks. At the overwhelming bittersweet sensations. Every tenth of a second it grows more intense than I had thought possible.

Noticing my body growing closer to my desperate release he tightens his hold. He removes his hand from my hip, but he keeps me in place by pinning me between him and the wall. My legs are tense enough around him to keep them from slipping. Moving his free hand over my body, he thoroughly feels every bit of me on the way to my face.

The thumb, still covered by the damned glove caresses my cheek, my jaw, and softly down my neck, like slow and loving kisses he is unable to give with his lips. "I will serve you, until my very last breath." He says it softly with his helmet buried in my hair. I dont know if I was even supposed to hear that, but stars, it was hot.

Normally I would probably have laughed at the direct and slightly strange comment, but right now, with him pleasuring me, almost like he is worshipping me, appreciating me, it makes me come. It is the final droplet in the bucket that makes it overflow. I come hard and long, my limbs tightening and trembling around him.

"Mesh'la" He groans in my ear, followed by more words of his language I don't understand. Moving his hips, he slowly rides me through my orgasm. His dick had swelled to his full size inside me again.

My breath finally slows down. "Being so good for me." I let my head rest against his shoulder. "Made me feel so good, Mando."

After a few moments he grabs on to my thighs again to lift me off of him.

When my feet touch the ground, my knees tremble beneath me. Immediately he steadies me. "We have got to get you in your pants again."

He is right, it had been dangerous enough fucking out in the open. On top of that, the night air had dropped in temperature. Goosebumps spread over my legs when a slight breeze goes by.

After helping me pull the tight pants up and buttoning them up for me, he kneels down to slide my boots on my feet.

I grin as I look down at him. "I don't know why, but I like you in that position."

"When we are"When we are back at the ship, I will show you all the things I can do for you in this position." He says while sliding a naked finger from my ankle to nearly between my legs.

His voice is so warm, so loving, so different from what he had sounded like for these few months. My heart swells from relief and happiness. Relief from finally coming and because I finally made my feelings clear to him. He had accepted them with open arms, literally.

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈

Base story | Path 1: Dom Din | Path 2: Dark Din | Path 3: Switch Din

Let me know what u think! Which of the 3 paths did you like more? <3

#din djarin x reader #mando x reader #heavy mando smut #din x oc #din djarin smut #the mandolarian #din x reader

41 notes · View notes

dirtybitfic · 10 months ago

Text

Road trip

Matt sturniolo fan fiction

-smutttttt,kinda long story might be a couple parts lols

(Contains- touching,teasing , gas station fight , dirty talk etc.and I think the rest of the dirty nasty will be in part 2)

Y/n pov-

Me and Matt have been dreaming of taking a road trip to Vail Colorado for years. Ever since we were about 14 me and Matt have just understood each other in a way that non of our other friends did . We have the same interests and music taste and we also both struggle with mental health and throughout the years we’ve helped each other through it a lot .

When Matt got his license we started talking about all the places we’d love to go to and Colorado was always our biggest dream especially during Christmas time since we both love Christmas and they always decorate their city’s and towns so perfectly that they look like the perfect hallmark Christmas movie towns.

As we got older we started to get more serious about planning a get away for a couple weeks but our parents didn’t think that it would be a good idea until we were at least out of high school which we understood and respected. This past year we all turned 20 and me and matt, Chris and nicks birthdays are only two months apart we decided to do a big conjoined party .

Chris and Nick said they had a big surprise for me and Matt and that they wanted us to open their presents after everyone had left the party . We were both slightly confused but we were excited to see what it would be.

After everyone had left Chris and Nick had us sit down on the couch as they placed bags in our hands .

Me and Matt opened them at the same time and at first we were both confused and laughing because the first thing in the bags were matching beanies .

“Chris why did you make us wait for matching beanies” I asked laughing .

“Y/n you gotta keep opening then it will make sense in a second” Nick said giving me a big smile.

We both looked at each other and reached into the bottom of the bag finding envelopes .

I opened mine first and it was a printed out picture of a gorgeous cabin in the mountains of Colorado.

“Okayyy a cabin ? What did y’all buy a mountain or something” I ask still slightly confused.

“Nooo y/n god turn it over “ Chris says lightly smacking my head.

I laughed and turned it over .

“OMG YOU DID NOT” I said excitedly realizing it was and air bnb in vail Colorado.

“SURE FUCKIN DID KID” Chris yelled back at me smiling.

“We’ll Matt you gotta open yours now” Nick says smiling at him clapping his hands.

“Okay okay give me a second “ Matt says as he opens the envelope.

“YOU RENTED MY DREAM CAR WTF GUYS” he says looking up smiling adorably.

“We sure fucking did dude. We rented you guys the car for 4 weeks . You guys have the air bnb for three weeks in December . We wanted you guys to have the perfect trip you’ve always dreamed of “ Nick says .

I immediately got up and ran at Nick giving him the biggest hug then Chris .

“Guyyyys thank you so much I love it and I love you” I said getting a little teary eyed feeling so overwhelmed.

“Really guys thank you this is better than we could have imagined “ Matt says giving his brothers a hug.

“How did you guys afford this like Jesus this couldn’t have been cheap” I say a little worried for their bank accounts.

“ eh you know we have just been saving for a while but thank our fans for that cause no way would we be able to afford this if our YouTube wasn’t doing so good” Chris says .

“We’ll thank you again this means the world to me i don’t know how I’ll ever repay you guys” I say as tears stream down my face.

“Y/n don’t cry “ Nick says bringing me in for a hug .

“I’m sorry I’m just so happy “ I say laughing a little bit wiping my tears away.

“ we’ll we’re glad you like our present “

“LOVE IT” I corrected Chris.

We all laughed and went to bed .

Now it’s a week away from December and I’m starting to get super excited our trip starts at the begging of December and I need to start packing since we’ll be gone for so mf long.

I decided to FaceTime Matt to see if he would go shopping with me for some more outfits I’ll need .

*ft Matt

(Matt picks up- Matt’s blue , y/n is pink)

Hey what’s up

Hey I just wanted to see if you were up to do a little shopping with me I need to get some more winter outfits for the trip

Yeah of course you want me to come get you

Yeah either way I can get you or you can get me doesn’t matter to me

Okay I’ll come get you In say 10 minutes I know you just love to be a passenger princess

Yeah your right sounds good

Okay I’ll text you when I’m outside

Okay see you in a bit love you

Love you too bye

(Call ends)

After about 15 minutes Matt texted me that he was outside so I put my shoes on and ran down stairs. I locked my door behind me and hopped into the car.

“Hey so where you thinkin the mall” Matt asks

“Sadly yes that’s where all the good stores are” I said sadly he knows I hate the mall.

“Alright let’s go then” Matt says as he starts to put in directions to the mall .

He tells me to connect to aux and play some music .

As come here was ending we were pulling into a spot and Matt turned off the car .

We got out and started walking in after we did a little shopping we ended up grabbing some food and parked to eat.

I cant believe our dream trip is only 4 days way

I know I literally can’t wait I don’t know how I’m gonna sleep I’m getting to excited

No seriously god we’ve been dreaming of this for so long I just can’t believe we’re finally getting to go. But what are you telling the fans since you’ll be gone for so long

Oh we pre filled a good amount of our videos for the next couple weeks but I thought it would be fun to do at-least one vlog with you while we’re on our trip you know most of the fans like you

Awww well that actually could be really fun

Yeah they can see us running around in the snow being fucking stupid that’ll be really fun

Oh yeah can’t wait for them to see me snipe you with a snow ball

Oh really

Oh yeah just wait you’ll never know when I’ll get you I’m really sneaky you know

Yeah yeah whatever

We both laughed and after we finished our food we threw away our trash and he dropped me off at home.

Fast forward 4days——

I finally fished packing last night thank god and I just woke up to my alarm it’s currently 4 am me and Matt decided to get and early start since we’ll be driving pretty far to get to Vail and we want as much day driving time as we can get.

Vail Colorado is about 30 hours from Boston so it’s gonna a loooong drive.

-incoming call from Matt

Hey what’s up

Hey I just picked up the car and holy fuck it’s amazing but I’m otw to get you now I’ll be there in a bout 15.

Okay see you then I’ll make sure to have all my shit down stairs by the time you get here

Okay see you in a bit

Yep byeeee

Call ends

I started bringing all my stuff down and grabbed a blanket for the car just in case one of us gets cold and filled up my water bottle and then put on my shoes .

Matt just texted me he was here and I started to grab some of my bags to take them out to the car.

When I opened the door I audible gasped the car was … gorgeous.

(A BABY BLUE BRONCO FUCK YESSSS MUTHA FUCKAAA)

Matt got out and helped me grab my bags .

Omg Matt the car is so prefect

I know right I can’t believe we get to drive this for 4 weeks

Yeah good thing you make good money cause gas isn’t gonna be cheap

True true

We got my stuff into the back after I locked the door .

Hey my mom made you a breakfast sandwich and that matcha shit you love I set it on the back seat

Awww she is so sweet she didn’t have to do that

I know but she wanted to she always says “y/n is the daughter I never had” you know sometimes we think she loves you more than us

Hey you know that’s not true but seriously I’m gonna text her and tell her thank you

After we hit the road we’ve been sitting in comfortable silence listening to my playlist I made .

Was playing as I started to get hot a little bit surprisingly I thought I’d be cold but my dumbass did what every girl does and wore nothing under my sweatshirt. I started to get uncomfortable and shift around in my seat which Matt noticed pretty easily .

Hey you good you keep shifting around

Yeah just getting a little hot

Well take of your sweatshirt then

I… can’t (I say awkwardly)

Why not?

Because I have nothing underneath

Y/n I don’t care if your just in your bra I don’t want you to be uncomfortable

No Matt I mean I have … nothing on underneath

Ohh ohh shit ummm well you could always just take your pants off unless that’s weird then idk what to tell ya

I mean ig as long as it’s not weird for you

No not at all get comfortable

I started to take my pants off and caught Matt glancing over making my face go red . It’s not like he hasn’t seen me in a bikini but I’m wearing a thong which for some reason feels a bit more intimate to see me in .

Matt clears his throat as I look over at him after I finally get my pants off and throw them in the back seat.

I decide to tease him a little bit cause I think it’s funny

What’s the matter Matt

What oh um nothing just getting a bit hot myself

Here I’ll help you get your sweatshirt off

Oh okay (he says as I help him pull his arms out and pull it over his head )

I gasp quickly realizing he had nothing on under his either. I don’t think he heard me though but god his tattood arm gripping that steering wheel and his big veiny hands . NO WTF AM I THINKING THATS MY BEST FRIEND.

I snap out of my trans to look away but he glanced over at me smirking a little bit.

Why were you staring at my hands y/n

What I wasn’t I don’t know what your talking about

Okay so what were you starring at then hmm

God I have to think fast I’m just gonna sayyyy

Yo-your tattoos I was just like looking at them

Oh well alright

Their just really cool

I moved my hand to trance over his key tattoo

I love this one

Oh really why?

I don’t know I just do

He suddenly moves his hand off the steering wheel I didn’t understand why at first but he moved it so I could trace over his other ones.

I really like this one too -I say tracing over his dog one with its mouth open

And why do you like that one or are you just gonna say . He tries to mock my voice “idk I just do”

First of all I do not sound like that you asshole and no I was actually gonna say I like it because it has a dark vibe and I love tattoos like that it reminds me of this hellhound tattoo I wanna get

Oh really well that’s cool . You gotta show me that Pinterest board you have all your inspiration on cause your tattoos are pretty cool

He says as he moved his hand to my thigh racing the dark moth I got for my first tattoo . The way he’s tracing it has my breathing becoming uneven and my heart starts to race. Idk why I’m feeling this way but Jesus I’m getting wet . It feel wrong but it feels so good.

I cant believe you got your first one on your thigh and it’s big too

Yeah idk I just felt like it was the right place for it

It didn’t hurt?

No it felt good to be honest

Ohh your one of those people huh?

What the Fuck does that mean

You just like pain that’s all

Oh ummm ye-yeah I guess I like the feeling of tattoos a lot honestly I almost fell asleep getting all of mine

Mmm interesting

Why is that interesting

No reason

Yeah okay whatever

God if only he knew . Me and Matt have never really talked about our sex lives with each other I mean sure we talked about when we both lost our virginity but other than that it’s not really our typical conversation.

Their was one time he was on my phone looking for a picture and he almost went into my notes app and I screamed at him so fast to not read anything In there . He obviously got scared and threw my phone at me and apologized but the reason I didn’t want him going in there is because my top note is my kink list .

YEAH MY FUCKING KINK LIST . That’s the last thing you want your best friend of like 15 years to read . He tries to ask me why I got so defensive over it sometimes but I’m to awkward to tell him why. Honestly if he read them I’m scared he’d think I was a freak which I mean I’m a freak in the bed but not as a person u mean you know what I mean.

As I’m deep in my thoughts Matt starts to move his hand further up my thigh which causes me to gasp and snap my thighs shut.

Sorry sorry

N-no your fine it just caught me by surprise is all

I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable

He try’s pulling his hand back down but my thighs have his hand locked in

No your fine you didn’t I just ummm I mean you know I have no pants on sooo

Oh trust me I know

He says looking at me with a sly smirk I didn’t know what he meant but my thighs slowly opened back up letting his hand free.

AHHH SHIT BITCH I yelled out this is one of our favorite songs to sing in the car we always goof off and it just puts us in a good mood.

And just when it hit me

He sung as he gently smacked my thigh jokingly causing me to jolt and laugh a little .

PLAY THAT FUNKY MUSIC WHITE BOY

PLAY THAT FUNKY MUSIC RIGHTT

Yesss Matt

I said as I laughed a little and we kept singing along until the song ended I started to get a little thirsty .

Hey do you got any drinks in the back

Oh yeah I packed you a couple doctor peppers in the little cooler can you grab me one of the Pepsis he says pointing to the little black cooler behind my seat.

Yeah one sec .

I unbuckling and turned in my seat trying to reach back to the cooler but the car was a lot bigger than I realized so I kinda had to bend over the middle console to reach as I was reaching over I could feel his eyes on me and as a joke I giggled my hips a little making my ass move . But what Matt did next shocked me .

I felt his hand smack down on my ass hard causing me to scream out from shock and the sting since it was straight skin to skin contact.

MATT

HEY IF YOUR GONNA PUT IT IN MY FACE LIKE THAT IMA SMACK IT

He says putting his hand up in defense . I sat back down and handed him his Pepsi .

You know I know I shouldn’t say this but… you have a nice ass

Oh I…th-thank you

I tried to hide the blush that was creeping on my face .

I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that

No no It’s fine you just made blush

I said laughing a little bit

Oh cute he said smirking at me

Oh shut up

I said shoving his arm playfully .

Do you mind if I take a little nap

No not at all we got a long while to go to so get some sleep I’ll wake you up when I stop for gas in a bit so you can pee and stuff

Okay

I got comfortable and dozed off .

I started to have a wet dream about Matt . He was touching me in places that felt so good and he was making me call him daddy and all this crazy shit and I was just getting to the good party when I got woken up by Matt shaking me telling me we were at the gas station.

Hey I’m stopping for gas you wanna wait her while I pump the gas and then we can go inside to pee and grab some snacks

Huh oh yeah yeah let me put my pants on

I reached back still half asleep trying to find my pants and I grabbed them and slid them back on.

I waited while he pumped the gas then we went inside. I didn’t relize I had to pee so bad until I got to bathroom and Jesus Christ I felt a lot better after I finished I walked back out looking for Matt seeing he was over by the drink section I started to walk over when I bumped into someone.

Oh my god I’m so sorry I said to whoever I bumped into

Yeah you should be fucking sorry princess

The guy says raising his voice at me causing me to take a step back kinda shocked

You don’t have to be a dick it was an accident

Don’t raise your voice at me sweetheart that’s not gonna end well for you he says getting In my face.

I started to get anxious and tears started to well up in my eyes I tried to keep them in to not show this guy I was scared of him.

Awwww you gonna fucking cry

I started looking back to find Matt but I didn’t see him anymore . Fuck he probably thinks I just went back to the car.

I …

You what bitch he spit the words out in my face as he towered over me . My fight or flight kicked in and I started to run away to the door to get to the car.

I opened the door and got half way across the parking lot before I got yanked back by my hair.

Where you going sweetheart. What did I scare you huh he said in my ear making me feel sick.

God where is Matt I started to say in my head as the tears started to stream down my face and I reached back to get the guy to let go of my hair .

That made him pull harder causing me to wine from the pain.

He kept saying mean ass shit in my ear but I was starting to have a panic attack which caused my hearing to go out all the sudden I saw Matt running at the guy and shoving him off me . Matt picked me up like I was nothing speed walking back to the car I was shaking in his arms .

He opened the door and set me down before closing the door and running to his side I’ve never seen him move so fast in my life I just curled into a ball crying from shock of what the actual Fuck just happened .

I’m so sorry y/n I thought you came back to the car or where still in the bathroom I would have never left you in there alone

I… I k-know you wou-wouldn’t I’m okay I - pr-promise I’m just sh-shaken up a b-bit

I know sweet girl I’m so sorry really come here

He said as he pulled me into him engulfing me in a big hug instinctively I crawled over the middle and sat on his lap sideways just wanting him to hold me for a second .

Shhhh it’s okay I got you

Matt says as he rubs my hair and holds me close

I smilled a little as I felt my body stop shaking and my nerves starting to calm weirdly Matt just has that effect on me he always knows how to calm me down.

After a bit I start to laugh a little .

What why are you laughing he said with a small chuckle

I’m a 20 year old woman sitting in your lap crying like your my dad and I’m a little girl having a nightmare it’s just kinda funny

I mean yeah when you put it like that

Okay I think I’ve calmed down thank you Matt

Of course pumpkin he says squishing my cheeks

MATT WHAT THE FUCK I say bursting out laughing

What I was just acting like a dad as a joke from what you said

Okay I mean it was funny and it cheered me up so

Good now get your cute little ass back in your seat so we can get going

Okay okay I’m goingggg

I said with a big smile and blushing checks. Did he just call me CUTE. Omfg he is gonna be the death of me . First my wet dream now this Fuck me this is gonna be a longggg trip.

I qued up some music and layed back in my seat and started getting hot again so I took off my pants. I guess the ac doesn’t work to well in here cause Jesus the heat gets hotter than a mother fucker and unless we wanna roll down the windows we aren’t cooling off anytime soon.

Started playing and I was just shaking my head along reading a couple text from some friends I had missed during my nap.

So uhh can I ask you something

Yeah ofc

What exactly made that guy grab you like that

Well um I had just come out of the bathroom and I was heading over to you by the drinks where you were and I accidentally bumped into him and then he started to get mad and all up in my face so I ran out the door and then he kinda I just chased me

damn all over you bumping into him

Yep I guess so

What a psycho

Yeah cause wtf I even said sorry like 5 times

Well at-least your okay

Yeah thank god you came to the rescue

Also uhhhh what we’re you dreaming about earlier

Oh uhhh why I shifted awkwardly in my chair wandering why he’d wanna know

Well you were kinda sleep talking a little bit

Uh oh what um what did I say

I was getting really fucking nervous now

Well um you said my name a couple times and then well you said daddy a couple times too

Ahahah ohhhh um weirdddddd yeah idk why I said that

Yeah hmmmmm what we’re you dreaming

He said more in a demanding tone

You really wanna know I asked nervously

Yeah I do

Okay I was uhh kind of having a wet dream

Ohhh I see was it about me

Maaaatt stooop

What come on just tell me now I really wanna know

Okay yeah you were in it

Damn well was it good

Mhm yeah sure ig can we move on

No no I wanna know the details

Keep your eyes on the road Mathew

Okay okay if I keep my eyes in the road will you tell me what happened

Yes I’ll tell you

Okay my eyes are glued to this rode now speak

Okay um well you were you know telling me how hot I was and you were asking me if I liked being fucked like a slut and you know I was like yes and you said yes what and I was like yes matt cause I didn’t know what you wanted me to say and you said nope try again and I said yes daddy and you know you started touching me and then you asked me to read my list of kinks to you and so I did and then yeah the dream ended .

Well uhhh I- um

I looked over and saw his face was a little red and he was shifting in his seat.

Yeah well you just begged me to tell you sooo

Yeah well your right I did. Was it at-least a good dream

Yeah yeah it was uh good

Oh yeah . So uhh is that kink list in your notes app

I- uh — ye-yeah

Read it to me

What Matt no that’s so embarrassing

What no it’s not

Why do you wanna know my kinks Matthew

I just do okay

Okay okay fine but you can’t judge me

I would never judge you y/n

Okay let me open it up real quick okay ummm god this is so embarrassing

Oh come on they can’t be that bad

Okay um

Humiliation, dominant x submissive , role play, whips, sadism,exhibitionism,dirty talk, auralism, orgasm control, impact play, consensual non consensual, praise kink, degradation by words, knife play, blood kink and uhh yeah that’s it .

Oh wow ummm alright

So uhhh the dominant one do you like to be the dominant or like

Oh god no I’m absolutely the submissive

Okay good

Good what do you mean good

Oh nothing nothing . So uh what’s consensual non consensual?

Well um I don’t know how to explain it well let me look up the definition, okay well it says it’s a style of bdsm where both people agree but one person acts in non consensual behaviors.

Oh so like if I held you down and told you to take it while you struggle and try to get away would that be that

Oh I uh y-yeah that seems pretty on point yep

At this point I could feel how wet I had become from that sentence coming out of him mouth just imagining him do that made me wanna scream.

I didn’t realize I had been squeezing my thighs together but he did.

Aww is someone getting a little worked up

No Matt shut up

Really then show me proof that you are or aren’t

What do you mean

Spread your legs

What

Spread you fucking legs

He said as he put his hand on my thigh prying them apart.

My breathe hitched as I looked down at his hand moving slowly up my leg.

His fingers hit the lace of the thong over my soaking wet core causing a small wine to escape my lips.

Now why would you lie to me hmm your so wet

I didn’t lie I just didn’t tell you the truth I said then realized that’s the exact definition of fucking lying

So you fucking lied sweetheart he said smirking over at me

Yeah I guess I lied

If I touch you will you be a good girl and stay quite for me

Okay PART 2 coming soooooon…

💋

#spotify #smut #fanfiction #matt sturniolo #dirty nasty

37 notes · View notes

wangxianficfinder · 2 years ago

Text

In the mood for...

~*~

1. Hello! I don't know if you'll get this by then but happy valentine's day! (Or belated) I was wondering if i could be led to a compilation of Good Person/ Parent Yu Ziyuan if you have one. It's hard to find any Wwx & Yu Ziyuan relationships in ao3 since the tags are mostly sarcastic 😂 anyways thank you!

some things go forward by everythingispoetry (T, 73k, WangXian, Modern AU, Hospitals, Teenage Drama, Slow Burn, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Happy Ending) yzy is a very good mother to wwx in this! Content warning for cancer treatments and hospitals, but overall a fluffy story.

And Time Is But a Paper Moon by sami (M, 138k, WangXian, XiChengQing, Time Travel, Fix-It, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Healing, Mental Health Issues, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, BAMF JYL, Getting Together) She starts still on the side of /harsh/ but nowhere near canon levels, and gets better as the story goes. There's also the actual Good Parent Yu Ziyuan (and the one conjoined with JFM) tag on Ao3

Still Waters by PorcupineGirl (G, 6k, wangxian, canon divergence, cloud recesses study arc, YZY pov, protective YZY, arranged marriage)

~*~

2. Any recommendations with the Xuanwu of Slaughter theme? @izamoonie

Cave Survival (or: how the Xuanwu cave could have gone) by cerbykerby (T, 6k, WangXian, Trope Fic, Alternative Events, Canon Compliant, forced stripping, Almost-Crackfic, Pining, Pining LW, JOblivious Wwx, Almost-Drowning, kiss of life and other tropes, Humor, Fluff, Romance)

won't you let me know you now by tardigradeschool (T, 12k, WangXian, Star Trek Fusion, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Mutual Pining, Telepathy, Vulcan Mind Melds, Pre-Relationship, very background 3zun, Protective Siblings, Friends to Lovers)

Outside Another Yellow Moon by Vamillepudding (T, 10k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ WWX, Fairy Tale Elements, Hurt/Comfort, LWJ Needs a Hug, Curse Breaking)

~*~

3. Helloooo!! For the next IITMF, I'd like to request these :

A) fics where Lans are protective of WWX. (e.g. Hoards and Treasures)

B) omegaXian being pregnant and everyone's doting on him (especially Lans)

C) fics where WWX is famous for his invention/books/cultivation etc. (bonus if his parents are alive/he's not a part of the Jiang)

Thank you so much ✨ @utxqia

3A)

Cluster of Clouds by Nika_Raven_Celeste (T, 19k, wangxian, LQR & WWX, JC & WWX, time travel, post-canon lans time travel, cloud recesses study era, confused WWX, soft LQR, soft LWJ, not JC friendly, not YZY friendly, genius WWX, horny LWJ, oblivious WWX, WIP) I think this one counts as protective Lans?

3B)

bridge & shelter by RennieOnIceCream (Hitsugi_Zirkus) (T, 3k, wangxian, ABO, pregnancy, mpreg, unplanned pregnancy, alpha LWJ, omega WWX, comfort, cuddling & snuggling, scenting, light angst)

3C)

To Respect a Scholar by FlautistsandPeonies (G, 5k, wangxian, WWX & LQR, genius WWX, not JC friendly, author WWX)

~*~

4. good day (or night)! I am in search of fics where wangxian are each other's firsts, like they are in canon. first love, first kiss, etc. preferably ratings M or E, but I won't mind anything else. thank you!!

my life’s journey is far from over by thelastdboy (E, 148k, WangXian, Modern AU, Canon Divergence, Madam Lán Lives, JYL Lives, WQ Lives, Post-Sunshot Campaign, POV WWX, Slow Burn, YLLZ WWX, Hurt/Comfort, Modern AU but not too modern™, mlm/wlw solidarity, Kink Negotiation, Kink Exploration, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, WWX Lives, Mental Health Issues, References to Depression, Additional Warnings In Author’s Note, Burial Mounds Ensemble as Family, Single Parent WWX, Selectively Mute LWJ, Eventual Smut, Light Dom/sub)

Half a Bottle of Emperor's Smile by wuzhishan (E, 20k, WangXian, Modern AU, Romance, Fluff, Pining LWJ, Oblivious WWX, Love Confessions, Getting Together, Friends to Lovers, College/University, First Time, A Typical Modern Day No-Angst Get-Together Fluff Fic)

Somebody With Whom to Dance by failedcharismacheck (T, 2k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Dancing, Slow Dancing, Friends to Lovers, Fluff)

In This Reality (it could only be you) by Khashana (E, 5k, WangXian, A/B/O Dynamics, fluff and porn, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Oblivious WWX, Lan Disciple WWX, very light somnophilia, blink and you miss it really, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Alpha-Alpha Sex, Rut Sex, Knotting, no dubcon, Alpha LWJ, Alpha WWX) (I hope the requestor is okay with ABO!) ((Also this I think was the response for a fic finder from before that I cant find 😵 I hope that person sees these tags and clicks on this fic!)

Sweet Ink Nothings by monarch_v (G, 2k, WangXian, High School, Fluff, Mutual Pining, Love Confessions, Secret Admirer, Friends to Lovers)

Rumor Has It by Ulan (T, 4k, WangXian, Getting Together, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Canon Divergence, spoiler warning, CQL-Verse, Fix-It, we were robbed in the ending)

For a Good Time, Call by ScarlettStorm, 1st in series (E, 170k, wangxian, modern, getting together, pining, porn, onlyfans au, sexworker WWX, minor angst, mental health, therapy is good) despite the sex worker Wei Ying tag, WY is only physically with LZ and it’s quite sweet

Teach Me The Ways by likeafox (E, 58k, wangxian, canon divergence, porn with (is) plot, much smut much feelings)

~*~

5. Itmf for fics where lwj is hurt or injured and wwx tames care of him? Im happy with Canon or AU!

Some strange magic by deliciousblizzardshark (M, 15k, WangXian, Fantasy, Witch WWX, Wizard LWJ, Major Character Injury, Sex Magic, Dual Cultivation, Love Confessions, Fluff and Angst, Blow Jobs, Anal Sex, Horny LWJ, Trust Issues, despite these tags, There's actually very little smut)

Careful hands by deliciousblizzardshark (M, 10k, wangxian, canon divergence, BAMF WWX, protective WWX, hurt LWJ, genius WWX, angst, hurt/comfort, getting together, first time, LWJ pov, not a fix-it)

my bones into your bones by butterflylungs (M, 17k, wangxian, post-canon, case fic, established relationship, whump, hurt/comfort, protective WWX, angst w/ happy ending)

~*~

6. bonjour! est-ce que vous avez des fics avec Xiao Xingchen, Song Lan, et Xue Yang, mais ils ne sont pas romantique? merci beaucoup!! (Soft translation - Good morning! do you have fics with Xiao Xingchen, Song Lan, and Xue Yang, but they are not romantic? Thanks a lot!! - Mod C)

Au demandeuse/eur/aire du #6: faut-il qu'il soit en français ? La seule fic que j'ai trouvée en français sur AO3 qui liste même les trois est MDZS en passant par les UA, par TsukiyomiHimeKuran (E, 13k, wangxian, modern, fantasy au, college/university au, high school au, no powers au, stripper au, who framed Roger rabbit setting).

To the querent for #6: does it have to be in French? The only fic I’ve found in French on AO3 that even lists all three is MDZS en passant par les UA, by Tsukiyomi HimeKuran

~*~

7. Hi! ITMF Yunmeng bro reconciliation while they are physically rebuilding Lotus Pier? Ie fics that focus on cutting wood, building houses, setting cobblestones, regrouping with any survivors, breathing the life back into their home.

~*~

8. I'm in the mood for fics like Piecemeal Souls by hypermoyashi

~*~

9. Hi there! 👋 so I have a request for itmf and im not sure if any of you will have much luck because, as often as fic of this general theme is requested, there doesn't seem to be a whole lot of fic written for it. So! Being a little bit more specific here: are there any fics (modern or canon au) where lqr is a jerk to wwx and then, when he realizes he was wrong, actually has to apologize and work to be forgiven? I've noticed a lot of fics where he's not a great person to wwx usually end with "but he loves babies and a-yuan so I guess he has to tolerate wwx now 🤷‍♀️" and I hate it lmao thank you for any help you can give me!

Hello! I was the asker for #9 in the latest itmf. I just finished reading hope blooms and it was good! But lqr wasn't even mentioned at all in it? So not really what I was looking for 😂 maybe my request was just misread but I'm looking for fic with lan QIREN messing up and then having to work for forgiveness, not lan WANGJI. Sorry for the trouble and thank you so much!

hope blooms by orphan_account (T, 3k, WangXian, Hanahaki Disease, Pining, Amnesia, Epistolary, Fluff, with a soupçon of angst I guess?, idk i feel like we all calibrate angst differently, Happy Ending) not sure if this may work for Requestor ?

What Comes After Love by Rainbow_Horizon (T, 17k, WangXian, POV LWJ, Protective LWJ, LWJ Has Feelings, POV WWX, Sad WWX, Jealous WWX, Módào Zǔshī & The Untamed Combination, Post-Canon, Insecurity, Chief Cultivator LWJ, Break Up, Separations, Healing, Husbands, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, marriage issues, Marriage Proposal) Asker, let us know if this works !

Deeper Seasons by piecrust (G, 8k, LQR & WWX, WangXian) I completely misread LQR as LZ 💀 sorry abt that 🙈here is another offering!

Judge Softly by Chrononautical (E, 32k, wangxian, LSZ & WWX, LQR & WWX, accidental voyeurism, non-consensual mind reading, oblivious WWX, bamf WWX, genius WWX, post-canon Fix-it, angst w happy ending, LQR tries)

I'm Sorry & Thank You by Iamnotawriter (T, 12k, WangXian, LQR & WWX, Canon Compliant, Post-Canon, lqr's epipheny, Angst with a Happy Ending)

~*~

10. Hi! I wanna know bout fics where a junior has a puppy crush (that doesn't go anywhere) on wwx. Or no crush but they admire him so much they are constantly hyping him up the way ljy is with lwj. Thanks!!

❤️ The One-Body Problem by metisket (T, 29k, LJY & WWX, LJY & LSZ, wangxian, possession, cohabitation) not a crush per se but ljy is in awe of Wei ying

🧡 I Don't Want to Debut! by countingcr0ws (G, 56k, WangXian, Modern AU, Reality show, Idols, Actor LWJ, Forced Contestant WWX, Tencent's 2021 Idol Producer) same thing here where it's not a crush but the juniors are amazed by Wei ying (modern au no cultivation but the Wei ying awe is real!)

~*~

11. Hi mods! Hope you're all well! For your next ITMF, could anyone rec me a fic similar to Three Together by catty_the_spy? I fell in love with it but I've not found any other fics with that kind of premise. Thank you!

~*~

12. I'm looking for trans man wwx

Trans WangXian Comp

Butter My Biscuit by LikeAFlamingKiss_Consume (E, 23k, WangXian, nonbinary!LZ, Transman!WY, Mpreg, WWX Has a Pregnancy Kink, Unplanned Pregnancy, Vaginal Sex, LWJ Has a Pregnancy Kink, ace spectrum WangXian, WangXian Have a Breeding Kink, Consensual Somnophilia, discussion of transphobia, Hints of dysphoria, Lactation Kink, Breastfeeding, Giving Birth, I guess a bit of sadism?)

strange feeling by siwona (M, 605, WangXian, trans man wwx, cis mxy, Dysphoria, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda?)

butter my biscuit by ariskamalt (E, 2k, WangXian, Modern AU, Trans WWX, Established Relationship, Cunnilingus, Consensual Somnophilia, Temperature Play, PWP)

it was the fault of the lips by luckymarrow (E, 15k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, First Time Blow Jobs, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, trans!wwx, cis!lwj, Getting Together, Deepthroating, Safe Sane and Consensual, Cunnilingus, Fluff and Smut, Misunderstandings, Communication, Transphobia, trans!WQ, Comedy, Romantic Comedy, Sex Toys, Sex Talk, gender euphoria, Masturbation, non-sexual nudity, Squirting, Come Eating, Creampie, Barebacking, Coming Out, Porn with Feelings, Porn With Plot, Switching, Pining while fucking)

our shadows fall away like dust by lamusadelils (T, 4k, LQR & WWX, LQR & LWJ, WangXian, Modern AU, POV LQR, Trans WWX, Supportive LQR, Graduate Student WWX, Coming Out, trans feels, Family Feels, all the feels, Found Family)

Wangxian are Married and Have a Son (But Not Necessarily in That Order) by mercyandmagic (M, 24k, WangXian, Unplanned Pregnancy, trans wwx, Disappointing LQR, Gender Dysphoria)

It is a serious thing just to be alive by Itgoeson (E, 57k, WangXian, Time Travel, Trans WWX, Established Relationship, Angst with a happy ending)

~*~

13. Hey, can you please rec fic(s) where LWJ fucks up badly and WWX does NOT forgive him? And maybe makes a fam of his own w/o LWJ?? @utxqia

To Be Filial by Samstagram903 (G, 3k, past WangXian, WWX/OMC, LWJ/OFC, Modern AU, Break Up, Sad Ending, Depends on Who You Ask, LWJ POV) LZ leaves WY because of 'Duty' and WY moves on 😌

drunk walk home by Anonymous (G, 760, WangXian, Mentioned WangCheng, Cheating LWJ, Sad WWX, Break Up)

drivers license by AG1234VL (T, 11k, WWX/Other, WangXian, LWJ/LQY, Modern AU, Hurt No Comfort, slight comfor?Non-Chronological, Song fic, Crying WWX, ice cream and beer, breakup weight gain, Lots of Crying, Angst, Homophobia, from lqr, wangxian breakup) Good breakup fic (for me is a we ain't never getting back together WWX and sad bunny LWJ). Chap 1 is breakup sad WWX. Chap 2 is happy WWX/ I've made a horrible mistake LWJ.

Infidelity AU Series by Asmayi (M, 38k, WangXian, WangYu, XianNing, Modern AU, Hurt No Comfort, Sad WWX, Cheating, Infidelity, Emotional Infidelity, OOC, Professor LWJ, Engineer WWX, Student MXY, Teacher-Student Relationship, College/University, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Heavy Angst, Married WangXian, Mental instability, Break-Up, Divorce, Not MXY Friendly) The first fic is pure agony and not meant for wangxian lovers. The following fics have WY moving on and finding happiness in a family of his own. There's also a fic with alternate timeline where LZ doesn't fuck up, for wangxian lovers.

~*~

14. Hello✨✨✨ i tagged you in a post but just to be sure, i'm sending this as an ask too, can you pls help us find this fic?

(The OP talks about how if novel and cql wangxian met cql wangxian would all be up in arms bc novel lwj married some rando while novel wwx laughs and enjoys the ensuing chaos)

I think it could be either a mood for or a ficfinder so just put this wherever's next if it's not a bother thank you💕💕 @evadingreallife

💙 feel better love by Anonymous (T, 8k, WIP, WangXian, implied WangXianXian, Post-Canon, Crack Treated Somewhat Seriously, in a haha jk...unless? way, Light Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Crack, Crossover)

Key Differences by pupeez4eva (T, 5k, WangXian, Humor, Dimension Travel, Crossover, Drama!WWX meets Novel!WWX, Public Confessions, Post-Canon)

We always get what we deserve!(Doesn't matter even if you think you don't deserve it. Fate has mysterious ways!) by Ajareenlovesbtsandshinee (Not Rated, 16k, WIP, WangXian, Post-Canon, CQL WWX and MDZS WWX Exchange places, Happy Ending, Post-Canon Fix-It)

The Young, the Horny, the Jaded and the Jade: Partners in Time by Admiranda (M, 43k, WIP, WangXian, Established couple, Crossover, road trip with your older selves, teasing your younger selves about their obvious crushes, yin iron does yin iron things, mdzs/cql crossover, adult wangxian, Teenage Wangxian)

I don't know if any of these are the fic you are looking for specifically but they do have MDZS WangXian meeting CQL WangXian - Mod C

~*~

16. *Holding out a tin cup to the ITMF crowd* A) Wen Ning and the Juniors? Spare Wen Ning teaching and traveling with the Juniors? The juniors supporting and standing up for Wen Ning? Wen Ning being adopted by the kids from various sects, perhaps? Just a crumb of Wen Ning and the Juniors for this poor old beggar?

B) Also, if at all possible -- fics where Wen Ning becomes a sect leader? The particulars don't matter, I just loved Wen Ning becoming Wen-Zongzhu in Time Is But A Paper Moon and now I have a mighty need for more.

Thank you in advance! @lewiscarrolatemybrain

16A)

Waiting On The Night Hunt by JustAWanderingBabbit (G, 50k, Grudging Respect Friendship, Inappropriate use of lightning storms) post-canon; Wen Ning gradually earns the respect of cultivationdom, chaperoning the juniors, helping out on night hunts, teaching cultivational alchemy to Lan Jingyi, and cleaning up some unfinished business of Xue Yang’s

intertwined with

Pieces of Us by JustAWanderingBabbit (Not Rated, 32k, dead characters being dead, Mostly Canon Compliant, Snark, Implied Violence, Happy ending.) the same storyline from sapient fierce corpses Jin Guangyao and Nie Mingjue’s POV

different people with a common pain by littledust (G, 2k, LSZ & WN, Grief/Mourning, Hopeful Ending, Minor OCs get (non-graphically described) cholera but they get better!) in the course of their post-canon uncle-nephew bonding trip, Wen Ning and Lan Sizhui investigate a village’s spate of mysterious deaths; the solution lies in Wen Qing’s legacy of healing

seances are not forbidden in the cloud recesses by EHyde (G, 611, Fluff, [Podfic] seances are not forbidden in the cloud recesses by sisi_rambles) Lan Qiren discovers that Wen Ning has volunteered as a test subject for the Lan juniors’ Inquiry practice

Two fics in which the Juniors throw WN a surprise birthday party:

When Flowers Bloom, the Heart does too by DepthOfMusic (G, 1k, WN's Birthday, WN-centric, Cinnamon Roll WN, One Big Happy Family)

And

gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder by lao_you_tiao (G, 3k, WangXian, WN/Happiness, Birthday Presents, Birthday Fluff, Fluff, One Big Happy Family, Post-Canon, Slightly sassy WN)—along with Wangxian

The Energy of Youth(s) by Laylah (E, WN/Junior Quartet, Sex Magic, Group Sex, literal healing cock, First Time for Everyone, Fierce Corpse Sex, Protect the Ghost General at All Costs) if you’re up for a raunchy take on your request, has the Junior Quartet infusing vital yang qi into WN in a sexual quintuple-cultivational ritual

16B)

Mending the Pieces by JustAWanderingBabbit (G, 98k, 3Zun) sequel to Waiting on the Night Hunt and Pieces of Us. WQL, although not exactly a Sect Leader, is by then in a position of authority and respect, running a non-sectarian night-hunt training camp on Lake Caiyi; his young students include the 3Zun, reincarnated, and an adult LSZ and JL take part in the adventure.)

~*~

17. Hello, hello! Hope you have a wonderful day/afternoon/evening. I was wondering if you have a list of "Wei Ying being adopted by other MXTX couples" or even couples that are not MXTX (ex: WenZhou). There is no list for that, no ~Mod L If not, I guess this could go to "I'm in a mood for...". Anyways, thank you for your hard work 🤠🤠

the hearth series by eccentrick (G/T, 65k, WangXian, HuaLian, Found Family, fluff with plot, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Disabled Character, Ableism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiāngs, slow burn found family, Adopt WWX, Married HuaLian, Post-Canon TGCF, Kid Fic, TGCF Spoilers) "a warm coal in the hearth of our hearts" by eccentrick and "the hearth" series in general

The Young Masters of Four Seasons Manor by gaotamao (G, 91k, WangXian, WenZhou, YeRong, Time Regression fix-it, WKX raises monstrous sons, Not Jiang Sect Friendly, No Golden Core Transfer) or the one specific one I know where WenZhou parent Wangxian that I liked

Spirited Away series by PhantomWriter (T, 45k, wenzhou, WKX & WWX & ZZS, wangxian, canon divergence, WOH crossover, adoption)

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic recs #i'm in the mood for a fic #the untamed #wangxian fic search #wangxianficfinder #long post

150 notes · View notes