#completely monotone too SMH

[shadow-lag]

Oh boy,, welp. Time for another long post of rambles. This time I'm watching the '03 tmnt B)

I'm on episode 4 and while I wasn't gonna do another one of these I've already had to put my phone down and walk around my room so here we are.

Fair warning: this will ofc contain spoilers. Everything I say will be random with limited context. (I dont expect anyone to even find this so-) And I'm a massive dork B) let's do this

I remember literally 80 seconds in I couldn't take a damn thing seriously- this is gonna be veryyy fun to watch

I can now see so many references rise (18) made and I'm going insane /pos New iterations make references to its past media! Who knew!

I think April is missing a rib or two /hj girl is absolutely snatched. I love her pants, I want those irl. (Classic big pants little shirt combo (why am I so gay))

Oh look! The boys are bonding over their anger issues! Why are they even fighting rn o(-( rise Casey is so small. Why is this Casey jacked- "for a little green dude, you are totally nuts" WHY IS HE SO SHORT YOURE RIGHT. he tough but smol. Lmfao. "Well isn't this romantic" HELLO??!??? guess I wasn't the only one getting enemies to lovers vibes over here, but you didn't need to point it out- damn. (Am I getting baited? In the ripe time of 2003?) Should Mikey have a personality outside of just being the funny guy? Yes. Do I appreciate all the jokes still? Yes. Yayy validate his cool new kick (I hate how Leo and Raph always beef. I need more happy brotherly bonding)

For brothers who aren't meant to be on the surface, they sure do make quick besties with the "surface dwellers" (as splinter would call them lol). Man any hope we had is gone fellas. The hets are here /lh? Casey within seconds has flustered April. This a lost cause smh. Casey you are on thin ice,, And in today's new. Local alley man parents a robot built in front of his very eyes (for money ofc). Mans is getting real emotional over this robot son rn. Wow this episode is actually pretty telling about parenting if you look at it too long. Yeah! Tell it to him straight April! Misogynistic characters don't belong in our silly little shows /srs

Bro just compacted his bike. Interesting to see them all have different sets of wheels and not just skate boards. Would have been cool to see that return. Or at least the roller blades (yes I'm 100% biased) I'm sorry if I've terribly read that. But did he just call the big blonde dude "hun"? What? (/neu) HE FLIES!! jet pack is much cooler but this is fun. WHY ARE THEY TAKING A BODY SHAPED THING FROM THE WATER? WJAT IS THAT. Is that a krang husk? The krang is in 03 isn't it? (Unfortunately (I hate the krang)) OH NO THATS DEFINITELY THE KRANG NOOO

Why IS Raph and Casey so buddy-buddy. I just feel like raph isn't the type to open up to someone so quickly o(-( Oh boy the foot is advertising turtle skewers all over the city. I don't think they're all too fond of raph little friend lmao. Casey why are you so ignorant- God yeah they reallyyy don't like casey rn lmfao BRO THEY STOLE RAPH AND THE DRAGONS ARE GONNA BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF CASEY? DUDE that's a little fucked up ngl. Ah I see. Smart moves case now go save your boyfriend. "This is some nice steel. How about telling me who gave them to you?" "Your mama" DAMN!! FOR REAL? WOW (I didn't think that clip was real ngl-) ah yes ofc he escaped he had plot armor my bad. Oh they're gonna drop Casey in the infinite water swirl. YOOO let's go Mikey!! Yippee the day is saved once more! Lmfao they really don't like when casey visits. I'm confused. I know this other ninja guy is most probably the shredder but who is his enemy is this? Does he work with the krang or like?? Maybe just a case of them connecting the wrong dots ig. Now who the fuck are the three monotone council members o(-(

Ooh boy fallen angel. Quite the title. Geez what did Casey get into now- hm I feel like fleeing the city would solve several problems but is a completely overlooked solution /hj man they look so goofy is normal clothes. Skivvies? What is that supposed to mean Raphael 🧐 I'm starting to think big guy isn't even human- nahh I think a wee bit of murder here would in fact be justified.

Ah yes vehicular manslaughter for this episode /j omg they've befriended the homeless and they are so sweet what the heck :(((( I'm crying /pos (no bc this is actually how it'd play out realistically. Outcasts stick together and I'm just- it says so much about our society but it's just a silly turtle show:( no wonder it attracted so many queer/trans folk with rise) don't you laugh at that sweet old man>:( help him get his friends back. Just got a very blunt lesson on capitalism. Based. Oh shit and now we are getting into slave labor. Uh- this episode is really touching up on reality huh. Oh god who the hell is this ugly dude gross. Please make him stop talking. What a veil thing. Yes good fall to your doom. NO WHY SAVE HIM? HES A HORRIBLE PERSON

Wait do they actually have tails? Mikey don't lie to me like this o(-( I wish with the design overhauls in rise they would have gotten tails. I know like it's easier to not animate them though so. I guess I can't complain too much. Oh the swords are important you say? Bad choice to say that out loud you're definitely going to lose them now. For plot ofc. And character development. NO YOU IDIOT DONT GO ANYWHERE ALONE. someone wack him with some rolled up newspaper and tell him you're proud of him please. Not funny-haha, funny weird. -Mikey, probably. I need tone tags on this guy /hj. Is he pulling my leg rn? What are you going against? No way he's not the shredder with the foot clan. Dude is definitely lying. Leo needs to leave. No don't accept the sword. No way it's real. Sincerity my ass o(-( dude. Council? Of krang right? God this show- so I'm assuming the krang and the foot doesn't like each other then? At least it's not mutual at least. Oh geez leo throw your brother off the building why don't you- Okay yes he is the shredder then. Ninja rat moment! Gotta throw in the tragic backstory. Bro got straight electrocuted to death /hsrs. Dang. Poor rat man. Wow Leo really did get played. L. Oooo fight scene in the storm! Come on give this big doofus another scar. God these council people are weird. Oop- here comes the shredder.

Oh okay so Hun is that dudes real name- I'm just dumb-

[a break in the rambles. Notes? Idk. This is gonna be extremely long huh- barely even through the first season and it's already an essay. Maybe I should tone it down a bit. I mean surely tumblr has a character limit]

"Whats the one thing I told them not to do? Face the shredder. Surely that's what they're doing then" (paraphrased) ofc. Like most rebellious children lmao. (My siblings for example lmao) welp they just broke into someone's apartment- lmao that poor kid. Raph is going to kill Mikey for that one if the foot doesn't first lmfao. Noo you can't leave the old (rat) man to figure out technology come on donnie. Bro is that the sword light saber thing from the mando? Wait so are they allies with the potentially the krang guys now? Master splinter had the look tm. Hmmmm I feel like the shredder will somehow survive that. Yep. He'll be back. L.

Bro there's super heros in this too- they'd accept super heros but not our favorite turtle bros? Not very cool new york. Don't make fun of his art :( damn poor mikey. Yes! April support!! Oh no who's this guy. THE MAGIC SCHOOL BUS? Oh. Super hero. Lmao in their faces.

"Meep"

There is literally so much lore in this series holy cow

I saw something something "kirby" on screen and damn near exploded. They are nothing alike at all. But man does my brain like to play me like a fool. Man this series was written by a bunch of crystal girls (/neu) oh my god donnie took kirby (the tmnt version) to dreamland /j holy shit kirby fucking died (please know my main coping mechanism is humor) (it's actually kinda sweet to think he's in a land of his imagination!)

[Okay this is so much longer than what my rise one was already omg- I should just close tumblr and give it a rest lmao. Honestly if Casey and Raph first interactions didn't seem so enemies to lovers this would have never happen /hj]

"Of the four of us leo is the one turtle you never have to worry about" *cut to leo fighting like 20 dudes by himself in the rain* Whats with Leo and getting thrown off buildings??

No it's not a great loss they're not dead just like walk through the fire and save them or something o(-( m a n

Wow calling the next one tales of Leo makes it sounds like he's actually dead damn- omg we get turtle tots in this one too this is amazing. The sillies<3 Raph. Buddy. Goofball. ITS OKAY TO SHOW EMOTION (that isn't just anger) COME ON

I was gonna say we need more light hearted goofy episodes like monster hunter but was completely cut off from, and I quote, "Someone once said, "The only difference between men and boys is there size of their toys." " and I am literally jaw dropped to the floor bc I did not take that line well- I am fighting demons rn (trying not to laugh in the middle of the night) I am so thrown off by that line-

Bro why did Leo call Baxter Stockmen a fruitcake💀 I'm sorry- did he just cut shredders head clean off??😭 sorry shredder but there's absolutely no coming back from that one lmao. EXCUSE ME?? well damn I guess there IS coming back from that one. So, not human?

If it weren't for like ninja honor and morals and all that Raph would 100% have these goons dead. Raph goes blind (real) Raph making friends with literally every "hothead" he meets in alley ways (part 2)

Oh these guys are absolutely wack job krang. EWWW NO THEY ARE KRANG D: oh man the boys are in trouble now. Just like give them their dad back and we can allll go home. Why is splinter in the orange juice. They really have no reason to fight. Like. Listen, crazy idea now. Just communicate. OMG THEYRE FUCKING GONE. THEY'VE BEEN DISINTEGRATED.

Okay wowza that's only season 1. 6 more seasons to go- this is going to be one wild ride huh. This show really knows how to keep ya on your feet. All this is doing though is making me wish we got more Rise o(-( how come this wack iterations (/pos) got so many episodes, but rottmnt barely got 2 seasons and a movie?

Starting season 2 same day ofc. I have to binge this show as quickly as humanly possible /hj perhaps I'll try to write less, maybe I'll write even more who knows. Eventually I'm sure I'll hit some sort of limit. This singular post is about to be more words than any fanfic I've ever wrote lmao.

Bros just got reconstructed in space. Mmm the star wars tmnt crossover all us nerds wanted. The guys are always getting into so much trouble 😭 I like how Mikey is more worried about how the colors of the dress clash with his bandana more than the fact its a dress. Based and real. Oh god the blue dude is hitting on Mikey o(-( yeah yeah kick his ass! Oh noo don't get caught. :0 It's chewy but blue! Girlboss Mikey!! Girlboss Mikey!! "You go girl!" Bro I'm dead lmfao. Finally they all have,, GUNS

"The big house" oh man they're going to jail. Oh wow yeah they're in jail. And now they are going to bust out of jail. Wonderful. Damn it Raph. Well dang guess spoons are a weapon. Welp off to the games they go then. Oh boy they've taken a hostage of a dictator. THE ROBOT IS GOING TO KILL HIMSELF?? Okay no he doesn't die (yet?. Hopefully not) Wow they all have horrible aim. It is truly bizarre all the shit the turtle bros get themselves into to. (How many times am I gonna have to say that before I can have a silly goofy episode o(-( ) Also can I say those tube things they have in their mouth for oxygen make no sense- like I can understand how that would actually work properly- I can only imagine it was just the easiest solution (to draw) They look so silly in the space suits /pos. Just makes me wish they would have been given tails in the rise redesign hauls </3 Oop the krang is bringing them back it seems. HOW MANY PARTS ARE IN THIS ONE?? ITS LIKE A WHOLE MOVIE AT THIS POINT LOL. Okay well it's to be continued, but this one is a different part 1, 2, ect. Oooo and now the new yorkers are suspicious. SPLINTS!! HES BACK!! YIPPEE. Ooo wait what they're buddies? Utroms. So um. Not krang? But like. Sorta similar? Do the krang and utroms have like a civil war or something I'm so confused o(-( Oh. My. God. Baxter is a fucking spider. I agree with Mikey I would not go in the pod. Okay okay. So this criminal utrom is gonna be the krang then, right? OMG THE SHREDDER IS THE EVIL UTROM DUDE. BRO. NOW IT ALL MAKES SENSE. BAXTER YOU MOTHER FUCKER. WHY CANT YOU JUST DIE ALREADY. I genuinely can but believe there's 7 seasons. Like. What on earth (or within the rest of the universe for that matter-) could they possible get into after this?? The shredder is literally a roach, how does he keep coming back o(-( at least stockmen is free from his control? Even know he has like just a head left- YIPPEE!! THE BOYS ARE GOING HOME!!

Splinter I have like 27 IQ what's with all the riddles. It's so odd seeing them without their bandana on lol. Raph you don't have to be a jerk all the time smh smh. Leo just happens to be better than all of you half of the time. No big deal- (kinda feel bad for raph and mikey. Mikey mostly. It feels like they don't have anything special:( I mean hell donnie is extremely smart, he's probably the most special. But leo has that edge in combat) Yep family B) *distant punches and screaming*

Oh boy quite the intro. Leo just dies. Right off the bat. /j what. Why does he seek leo o(-( icecream!! Raph seems to like mint chocolate chip! Win! Oh right this guy. Wonder what his deal is- DITTO!! Huh- this is so dumb >:( agreed very over dramatic. Also didn't shredder kinda like,, defeat himself. It was his bomb thing after all. Omg did this dude just portal away in his cape. Metaknight?? Is that you?? /s literally stole mks moves smh. Haha take the L random ninja dude. Now he's the real greatest warrior in the galaxy. Wow this episode is so random lmao I love it. Can the time be right like now- I'm so confused o(-(

The little intro things are so silly. They're like interviews at the beginning. No Casey it's not a date or anything at all nooooo. (I wish it wasn't a date smh get your romance out of my goofy ninja turtles show) dude I kinda feel bad for this robot kid thing. If only the nanobots ended up in better hands. LMAO "and when will you have her home young man?" AS IF YOU ALL ARENT FRIENDS IM CRACKLING. Thank you donnie finally someone wants to help it. NO NO KISSING>:( GO BACK TO BEING SILLY AND GOOFY

Yes you are absolutely always getting into wack ass situation Mikey great observation. Finally someone said it. Noo Mikey is about to be eaten by a giant gator- bros just trying to live and they're messing with him lmao. HUH? Are those like magic glasses o(-( oh no he just talks normally. Just a normal everyday fellow mutant. Swear to God if he's working on a new body suit for shredder- who *somehow* is still alive. SEE RISE RAPH COULD HAVE BEEN SO MUCH COOLER WITH A BIG TAIL. YO cool he's a mutant dude too. Wait was he there when the building exploded and all that? Yes. You the one it just scanned fight it first. YEAH GATOR GUY KICK HIS ASS!! Bro,, :( thats so sad what the hell.

This show was absolutely written by a bunch of crystal girls. (/neu (I have a bunch of crystals myself lol)) These guys are insane. Where do they get the funds for all this stuff anyways- damn right you're proud of him. Dude is insane intelligent-

Ooo starting this one with a song huh. The foot? And the wacky tie guy? Oh shit right it's the gang wars episode isn't it- TURF WAR (my brain is impeccably small) [splatoon reference]

Ya know I wonder if these sorts of shows have like idk psychological affects on kids? Like do they leave any sort of impression on them? Are kids who watch these "crime fighting or hero" shows more likely to be "good-do'ers" and have better morals bc they are given an example of the hero and see how the bad guys always lose, have bad endings, and inflict so much pain (and property damage lol). Are these kids more likely to take up jobs like police officers? What even makes a person want to be a cop anyways lol. Idk. Food for thought I guess. All coherent thoughts must go to the mega-post after all.

BAXTER? IS BACK?? AGAIN??? I shouldn't even be surprised anymore.

Honking

Have I mentioned how much I envy their voices sometimes. Bc damn o(-( it's just occasional lines. Here and there. Lmao transmasc things ig.

Bro. Raph. Leo. Stop fighting you dingdongs. Ofc Hun is back. BROS GOING TO BLOW. Karai? Haven't I heard that name before. YOU CANT JUST COME IN HERE AND KILL OFF LEO LIKE THAT LADY. genuinely how do they make this last 7 whole seasons lol

Why are those two dudes like super yellow- I can only imagine this is sorta racist..

I'm sorry is that the shredder?? Broooo. Oh- yeah yeah that makes sense. That's what I was thinking lmao. This is just- dude o(-( would have been cooler if the plan worked. RAPH!! SPLINTER!!!!! God damn it he is actually back. Where is your honor!?

I'm so sorry, Baxter? Uhh that's a bit too far now. Please just kill him off. This is getting ridiculous 💀

Woah the plot twists in this one is crazy fr ZOG NO!! he killed a man in cold blood,, the turtles would have been toast without you Zog. Rip <//3

Uhh I think I skipped one but WOAH TINY ROBOTS ROBBING THE COMIC STORE! They've got the tiny guy. Ofc Don is tracking the old men lmao. Plot twist, the two super heros had,,,, SEX. Win day for Mikey tho let's goooooo.

THE BATTLE NEXUS USED TO BE HONORABLE? Wow splinter is even more of a nut than the boys. BUNNY BOY??? REAL?? I remember absolutely nothing anyone told me about usagi? (I forgor his name) aww splints:( the boys are all grown up. Uh oh. Traximus sounds so close to Draximus which is my dogs name lmao. BUNNY BOY-O IS BACK OMG. omg he's so dumb looking lol. Ooo toffas! The shredder?? Well his helmet anyways. So uh. When do they kiss? (Joke) wait what if splinter and like leo both make it to the very top? Do they just fight each other? Aww donnie:( poor dude he will never live this down lmao. Woah the ninja dude is just as bad as the shredder. L. This guy is so lame. Kill him off! LMAO ofc. Quite the match ups. Mikey sorry you're out lol. Aw splinter you're so cool. Okay that makes more sense tbh- dude is about to get clapped by his son. (Uh killed that is) Oh? Kinda surprised Raph won that. Okay. Ohhh noo. I am so normal about this show (lie) Okay I'm not quite down with this one but I don't see how the ship stands as of now- unless the fandom is literally just clinging on anything we can get lol [boy this is making me what to do a video essay just rambling about this show. Just overall. And some of its themes and topics it discusses. I have my gripes, but I'm overjoyed to watch it still] anywaysss. Uh oh leo! Donnie to the rescue! (Wrong target tho don!) You stupid red haired jerk. Welp big powerful dude is dead. Oop. Wait until raph and mikey finds out what happened. YOU SCUM DONT FRAME THE RAT >:( Usagi the doctor bunny! Mikey! Stop running your mouth! Eep! You red haired mf>:((( stop>:(( ofccc it's the dragon. Uh oh. Uh oh. They don't even get to see what happened to Leo. Lmfao now it's raph and mikey that's hilarious. Oh my God mikey being annoying is a genuine strategy lmfao. This is hilarious. Crackling rn. Raph that's absolutely stupid?! Let's go!!! (Love this trax guy) uh hating this stupid shadow creatures tho. Yippee! Donnie and Usagi saving the day! I can certainly see why everyone loves Usagi. He's such a little critter /pos /aff. Brave Usagi!! Yippee!! NO DONT SKEWER THE RABBIT. Oooo leo! Mikey for the win!! It would absolutely be the most funny outcome. Yeah good! The staff should fight back! Too bad it didn't fight back hard enough. Oh boy a dimensional rift huh? Is kirby coming to eat a car? (Sorry) ((lie)) bye bye red losers! Fall to your own evil plans. WOOOOOOO LETS GO MIKEY!! That's it with Usagi? A bit surprised. The sillies<3 once again mikey is technically the most powerful lol. No- not the dinos coming to invade earth- God that was a long one. See ya in the next!

Hm perhaps it is in fact the end of the world. Donnie D: looks like we're going back to space boys

Raise the stacks? Who is this guy? Wait I thought the justice league knock offs were all old and stuff. This show is so confusing o(-( oh boy they're bringing out the nukes. Oh- do they actually survive nukes? Yes ofc they do. I agree with Mikey. Hand over my happy ending. Damn poor donnie- BRO JUST NINJA-ED HIS WAY OUT OF THAT?? Wow this is going to kill the economy fr. Come on donnie your brothers can totally kick ass (plus they're like not even on earth rn-) oh god they're gonna get shot. Yippee!! Another rebellion dude! Double ship theft. Poor mikey. He just wants credit for all their hard work lol. Did he- did he just come back to earth?- this little bot is a funny guy. Uh oh I think that's the other space nerds isn't is? The,, government? Makes sense. Raphy is such a cute nickname. It's hilarious how he's the one with that kind of nickname since he's the 'hothead' ughhh the American government is here. Leave the space stuff to the mutants please. Oh they're just goons o(-( Uh nvm government? No it is the military? I'm so confused. Why do they have laser guns. Yeah Don that's what I'm saying. Heyyy splints time to go. Yes take them with you and go. Now we fight the US military. WHO IS THIS FREAKY GUY???? ew stop. Bishop. Yeah. More like bitch hop out of here right now. Stop speaking like that. I hate this show. Where is the justice. Well hopefully honeycutt actually like wiped his memory or whatever. This is why you can't trust the government kids. No leatherhead D: stuck in a drawer.. gross. Holy shit I hate this bishop guy. Yall better hurry before they look their DNA and shit (and their lives-) GO SPLINTER JUST LIKE KILL SOMEONE FOR ONCE. (sure it goes against the ninja honor whatever but this guy deserves it!!) HE IS ONE SCUM BAG MAN WHY THE HELL IS HE WINNING??????? Hate this. Someone give raph a gun and permission to kill. Oh boy he IS the system. Rare good side win. Still hate bishop an insane amount. Let's keep in mind these guys are like what 16? The trauma is off the charts o(-( another honorable hero lost o7. This show is so wacky and weird. At least they won? I mean obviously some things are foreshadowed but things are still so unpredictable- I wonder what trouble the boys will get into next. I mean bitch bishop will be back, so will the shredder and the foot. And I guess baxter is to some degree alive??

Oh god who's this guy. A true ultimate power bump? I suppose? Raph this is why we don't cheat in racing. He's a good guy you goons o(-( yay! Old lady to the rescue! Finally a cat that likes Raph. Rise!raph wishes. Um? The train can't really get them right? Plot armor and ninja quickness and all- If anything happens to this old lady I'm coming after everyone myself. Ah yes thinking. A brave new world for mikey. Awww he gave the money to the old lady:D yippee!! Literally the best part of the whole show calling it now. Finding out one of them isn't dead? Cool. Helping this wonderful old lady? Absolutely awesome! I hope raph gets another tea party with her honestly-

And this episode, trauma response, nightmares! Poor LH:( oo the evil turtles are scary. Oh no. Mikey is out- aw:( dudes got landmines fr. I love how they look after each other and joke around <3 the sillies <3 okay back to the saddness- what the fuck why is everyone in this place absolutely wackjobs with no heart and morals??? o(-( YAY!! Can't handle another sacrifice. :) family

Oh boy this one is titled hate. Can only wonder what this is about. They always get into the wackiest situations- lmao never alone april and casey. Bro I thought that was Casey and he got shot- damn- lmfao bro got pants. LMAO I have a solution hate crimers to kick the aliens out of New York we are gonna,,,BLOW UP THE ENTIREY OF NEW YORK. Quite the plan. Uh oh mommy's home casey. Aw Ma likes April. Lmao she found about splinter and the turtles too that's amazing. Ma is another character we must protect at all costs.

BATMAN? nobody?? Huh. Mikey be like mom said it's my turn with the video games >:( lmao. Dudes covered in true black paint lmao. Wow they touch and go guys are back. L. Broooo why are there so many villains in New York. What does the rest of the world do? Do they have villains? Who fights there weird crimes? Villains across the globe be like. Ya know what'd be cool? If we went to new york permanently. Hell yeah he's a someone now. I think Hun is gonna be fired lmao. I think a certain group of everyone's favorite green boys accidently pulled an all nighter lmao.

Uh guys maybe you shouldn't leave casey out at night. MORE TURTLE TOTS!! omg they're so cute. Young casey? Why doesn't anyone remember this? They're so silly. Lmfao they are horrible liars. They're so adorable. They're so goofy omg. This is so silly that's why casey scream goongala or whatever all the time- lmfao theyre all confusing him. It seems like leo and donnie were the first to take any sort of training to heart. They are all still horrible liars tho lmao. Busted~ oh well I guess casey was just sorta a natural in street fighting-

Ooo Christmas episode? Please tell me mikey gets to keep the cat pleaseeee (I'm sure he'll like give em to the kids or something but man it would have been nice) how does clunk say in his coat through all that- oo raph? I didn't think he was the type to be into interfering with people's romantic relationships (trying to make casey and april kiss with mistletoe lmao) I guess it makes sense. Cj and him are the closest. USAGI!!!! what did he say o(-( aww they got swords for each other lmao. I wonder if he will actually use it. Lmao L casey. I too love cookies. Aw:( where's mikey? Just in hot pursuit with the cops no big deal. He's literally causing more harm than good o(-( lmao beautiful. PLEASE LET HIM KEEP THE CAT. Aww. rat santa. Wait does this mean he keeps the cat?????:D

Did she just break his neck- dude stop fighting each other lmao. I wonder who keeps calling donnie? This is the second time now. Dang did they actually train the foot clan this round? Bro:/ stop hitting on the foot lady. B o o m. Karai? Good. That's right. Eventually she'll be on the good side. Confused,, always.

Excuse me. Did master splinter just fucking die as the intro o(-( THE CAT IS HERE!! uh oh. What. Why does Don just know Italian lol. Welp time to fight the dead. Okay so this isn't real. I wonder what this all means? What they fear most? IVE SEEN THIS CLIP WITH RAPH AS SHREDDER BEFORE? HUH? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN. IM SO CONFUSED HELP. Hmm so Leo's is about not like being independent enough? A good enough leader to not need help. A good enough ninja to not get his own father killed for coming to his aid. He fears being a disappointment and a failure. Oh o(-( Uh. Donnies? Maybe afraid of losing those he's meant to protect ig? Having people not listen to his own orders and paying the price.? I'm not really sure on that one. It's a bit confusing and probably could be interpreted more than the others. Mikeys seems tied back to that one deal leo almost made with the shredder. But also a fear with losing his brothers in whole. Raph is clearly afraid of hurting those he loves whether it's directly or indirectly. Probably due to his consistent rash course of action. Those are just my quick theories though! I did drop out of psychology after all lol. What happened to the staff? Ah there it is. What would leo even do with all kinds of power anyways lol. Oh my that must be spooky to watch- oh. Welllll guess it's not dead:/

Oop new guy is finally killing off baxter. Ohh the calls were from her. Damn he doesn't get squashed. Or the calls are from honeycutt. I'm not paying attention enough lmao. Omg they've been shoved into a crate haven't they? Rude. Can't just drop them like that. Let's go professor!! Welp wrong direction oh well at least it's not in the air. Kinda feel bad for karai.

Wow that's a lot of lore. Just out of basically no where lmao. Woah these filler episodes are getting out of hand- bizarre.

Okay. And I thought last episode was crazy. Dude just tried to attack time. Okay,, so that all happened. Wack. How do you think they tell these to splinter? Do..they even tell him? Is it worth trying to explain-

Bro can't bishop just die please. Poor raph is bike is gone. Surely baxter doesn't make it out of this one.

Bro donnie just appeared- oh wow. He's back. They are back? Ohh wait so they do actually tell splinter of all the shenanigans they get into lol. Or some of them at least. Omg so I guess that one time when donnie said during the second nanobots episode that if splinter were evil they would also likely be evil. I guess he was wrong. At least in this universe. The turtles are always the good guys. Omg that's absolutely hilarious mikey really knows how to leave his mark huh?

Good morning all beings and forms huh? I think that one. Wayy better than ladies and gentlemen.

Okay I was gonna comment on raphs more (speaking of the other two, I wonder what these mean? The others so far seemed less harmless than this one, if anything they were enjoyable (sure mikey had to save the world but he loves superheros so) I can only assume donnie will be saving this world, or trying to anyways, or teach someone(s) a valuable lesson (like raph did) I'm just confused as to what part of this could be possibly enjoyable for donnie. I've actually heard a good overview of this episode. Guess I'll actually have to watch the full thing before I come back huh lol. Oop- it's crazy to think in a similar reality they would split up. You would think leo would stay, but it makes senses it's actually mikey. Oh- hes dead. Holy moly they've merged. It kinda makes sense after all that hun and baxter would form a (probably forced) alliance and join the rebellion. Oh. Nvm. They still hate each other lol. Damn donnie better watch his back now- oh my they look worst for wear too. Oop straight to the room it seems. Damn he's huge. Finally! April has a gun! Oh- guess hun is a goner- Mikey? MIKEYYY. AIM FOR THE HEAD DAMN IT. How does leo fight so well blind? Oh damb there goes leo- holy shit this uh doesn't end well does it. Uh? Are they not really dead then? Um. Yay! They did it? Guess he saved this world. Woah. Quite the episode. I wonder why his was so,, bad? He too saved people and taught a lesson. It'll be interesting to see Leo's now.

So leo goes to usagi land it seems (idk where that dudes from sorry-) oh wait so we don't see Leo's part in that one? Just usagi somehow contacting leo and taking him to the battle nexus area. Okay still going with this plot line. Very confused. Oh- what-? Is this for real? o(-( it's so funny to think so one realizes they're ya know green and such when they have clothes on. Uh oh- this isn't good. Why even is Usagi so like loyal to Leo? Maybe it is just some honor thing and this is how a friendship would work. I mean Raph has Casey. Oh dang so he gets all of them at once. Crazy. I guess he would have the most focus. Dang poor donnie- looks like they're a but more powerful than what they thought. Oop- quite the few episodes.

Icky sound I hate it. When can bishop just like idkkk pass away maybe? Please? Hate this guy. Wow he really does get around for an earthling. Uh maybe that's where he got the tech. Evolution? That thing is half robot. Aw he pushed mikey out of the way:( oh god he's ugly. Ew he just disappeared. Let's go honeycutt! Well there is 4 more seasons I'd say they do something right you freaky jerk. Dang conceded much? Can it truly be over with bishop. I really hate this dude. Oh- wish came true? Guess they really hung this guys career to dry then. I'm surely not complaining. Damn. I never win smh.

Oh? Interesting. Ooo he actually got a shot in? Wait isn't donnie and LH in the tunnels?? Oh dang. Brawling moment. How the hell is this bishop dude so good at combat. Huh? He didn't know? I would have thought he knew. Dumb blob. Looks like the end for you. Damn you karai stop being a dumbass. Oh shit donnie. Jump jump jump! Let's not forget this is only the half way point of all this-

Welp to space we go then. Oh god he's got an even uglier body. Does splinter like make it to the finale of all this? WHAT HELLO EXCUSE ME HUH DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN IS LEO OKAY HE MAKES IT RIGHT SURELY THIS IS LIKE TOTALLY FINE RIGHT. Oh man. I am just. I'm gonna need to pace around the room. Wow Karai finally using your brain here. Leo? Man:( honor to the end huh. I just want to know how they actually survive all this. Bc if they do surely the shredder does too. YES UTROM!! THANK YOU. Too bad bishop didn't magically end up on the ship. Wish he would die too lol. Wow this dude has caused so much harm. Finally. Dude is gone. Too bad Karai. You could have stopped this yourself. Woah this is great. Rare turtles win:) really should have just totally killed that evil blob tho. Would have been easier and for the better- lol they're gonna need a new intro now.

Well shit they can just never catch a damn break- oh sweet yeah new intro. I guess shredder is really gone then? Who is this weirdo. Ofc wack job has a gun. Oh my God they've put Raph in the closet. Lmfao. That's perfect. Uh oh mikey. Hard to fight with no legs. Finally some good luck lol. Hell yeah you are all that and a bag of chips mikey B) lmfao. I need to see donnie with more winning one liners. Nightie night dragon boy bam! (I don't mention enough how much I love 03 donnie. Hes just a funky lil guy.) Lmfao the little doodle. I haven't been keeping proper track of my favorite episodes but I'd say this is one of them. S4E1. Let's go ninja April!! Raph you're such a butthead lmao. Aw that's cool. What would they do with a bunch of money anyways?

There's no such thing as boring around here mike. Omg I just noticed. Usagi is in Leo's little intro thing. Perhaps I can see where the fandom is coming from with these two. Damn. Leo:( omg casey you dork. Uh oh- can't even watch the stars around here smh smh. Woah raph stopping leo from hitting something? The universe has shifted lmao. Why so many flowers o(-( (does he stink? Eh probably) Dude just got picked up like bird food. Amazing burnt pancakes. The sub plot love story is really coming together. Dude mikeys legs will never heal at this rate- oop into the bubble you go weird crazy blue lady. What? Interesting gift ig? But a gift nonetheless?

Man leo:( always so hard on yourself. He's definitely got that leader syndrome. Uh fish lady? Oh more of those ancient people. "Where we could spawn" excuse me- how do they stay under water that long. Leo's shell :( I didn't notice the slice until now. Oh god I didn't know those things were called "dikes" it sounded like donnie was calling me a slur 😭 "Um, just a little guy in-" nope cut. Stop right there. You are in fact just a little guy. End of sentence /aff yeah idiot. The turtles are good do-ers! Lil fish people live!

Hm?. Leo going out without the bros. But bringing casey? This is a bit confusing. I agree with case he's definitely be eating out of raphs bowl a little too much. No one thinking for you blue one. What has gotten into him anyways:/ Leo's lost his mind. Was that the sound of bones breaking? I'm sorry has he actually gone nuts? Oh boy whats in the ice crate. Agreed what on (totally not) earth? Oh creepy demon thing. Why does the military have that beast anyways- damn I'd just leave if I were Leo. Looks like they've got their hands full anyway. Ew- oh. He's in two pieces. Leo actually goes insane (real) oh. That thing is a test subject ain't it. Oh god that's nasty. What is this show rated- they don't show much blood violence but uh body gore is in the table- do you think Leo's shell ever heals all the way? Ouch- Bishop you whore. Well damn looks like everyone knows the boys are back in town. Aw:( that's so sad dude. Everytime I see bishop I hate him even more.

Is that the clone thing guy? That the turtles took out? Yeah I'd say so. Mikey is so goofy /pos. That's a lot of rats- oh no mike- this ain't good. It's the damn rat king. How does this guy control the dang rats anyways o(-( the boys are going home with a million and a half diseases tonight- that whole building is going down. Leo stop trying to take things by yourself it's not going to redeem yourself. I agree with raph. Something has definitely gotten into leo. Oh my God that's so many rats. Gone to the rats. The like one million rats. Why didn't the rats eat him. I'm so confused. What does he even have to do with rats??

Oh boy mikeys gotta do a rematch. Huh? Are they training or actually fighting leo?? Oh okay training. Lmfao mikey. Aw even all the shit he talks about mikey he's still the first to jump in and save him. Sore loser much? LMFAO poor mikey. Okay so like really what's with leo. Doesn't he technically still have a match in the battle nexus? Sureee "play". Dude might actually kill mikey. Nope I think he is in fact talking about himself. Mikey o(-( you have to be serious. Damn- very VERY sore losers. Dude is speaking in key board smashes. Holy moly what a jerk. Mikey is going to have rights to gloat after this one. (So will leo honestly) LETS!! GO!! MIKEY!! Lmfaooo yeah they are never hearing the end of this. This is hilarious.

What just happened to splinter? What's with the water o(-( OH NO KLUNK! You are not about to tell me that poor little cat drowns:( no klunk:((( that was so uncalled for:( ew people. BISHOP YOU BASTARD YOU KILLED KLUNK. YOU WILL KNOW PAIN. yeah maybe a bit of a show off- DUDE- what the fuck is wrong with this damn bishop guy. Dude. Casey and April are basically dead without their plot armor. Shredder,,,,,, no way. He can't be real. This must be a trap. They've made mock robots before. Down to damn soup cans. This is not my silly little turtle show. Perhaps this is a vision. Oh wow he is good. The element ninja things? I've seen faint things about an early version of the mystic powers in 03. Is this how they get it? Klunk is okay:D Karai you bitch why are you like this.

Have I mentioned how much I absolutely hate bishop? That creep isn't fully human is he. No wonder bitch boy is so good at combat. Oh no that goop is not going to be good for the sewers.

Lmfao splinter. Read em and weep boys. Aw klunk. Raph is really rubbing off on Leo huh.

Uhhh idk where I left off here or if what I had saved. Uhh anyways! Yippee casey you actually used your thinking skills! Oh shit it sounds like hun broke raphs arm- uh oh. Have I mentioned how funny it is they replace cuss words with "shell" it's hilarious (to me). Lmfao donnie with the missiles! Casey. Remember what raph taught you. Your honor. Or what your dad said ig. Oh boy. Gotta have some wicked on the fly driving skills huh donnie- yes you are amateurs. You're like 16- damn leo is going off- aw he's gonna visit his dad:( wait did they just leave leo? Awww dude:(

Oh it's that nobody guy again? Oop- lmao poor mikey. Always getting slapped upside the head lol. Dude looks wack in the shadows lmao looks like xray might be in trouble- lmfao mikey in the dress again /pos. This isn't good for xray. Yeah everyone needs to packing! (But as transmasc reference) the gang shit in 03 goes insane fr o(-( it's so funny how absurd everyone's aim is. Let's go xray. Uh. Doesnt jencko still have a gun? Who let all these thugs have such high tech weapons- uh oh- he's nobody>:) success! Lmfao he's still in the dress. Ugh hun. Oh wait wasn't she supposed to go to jail?? Wonder what they're hiding in that statue. Karai can't you just like turn to the good side. Where's your honor? (Or morals for that matter-)

Halloween episode!! Shell yeah!! (Lol) I also love Halloween:D but uh for different reasons lmao. Ofc they ruin Halloween too- lmfao raph just stabs his pumpkin. Ofc donnie uses the laser. Uh oh werewolf. And a witch and uh pumpkin king? Uh- what if it wasn't a costume. How could he be so sure before he sliced at his face o(-( couldn't he have just paid for it? Like- agreed. Carmel apples are yummy. Lmfao. Looks like raph and mikey sorta get their way? Leo stop being such a downer smh. Aw:( that's so cute. Ooo-kay. Lol. So silly how they always managed to get involved in all this. Was the door too good for them o(-( ooo fun fact. Good pearl necklaces actually have knots between each bead to protect the pearls while wearing and in the case of a weak string snap very little pearls will fall off. So a good quality pearl necklaces should not snap and go everywhere like that:) little creepers. Aw don. How powerful are their kicks? Oh dudes made of stone. Yeah:) they are nice kids:) little nicer than what you'd like officer-

Wow good quote actually. Looks like we get more usagi! Excited to see what he does this time. Agreed. Leo is losing it. Geez mikey really laying it down hard huh? Saying it as it is- raph should totally train his temper lol. Miyamoto? Haven't I heard that name before? Lmfao. Why does he have shades on? Maybe they just can't handle the light of the city. Why is leo separate from the group:l bounty hunter? Why is everyone after leo- damn. You would think more people would be after mikey. Champ of the battle nexus and all. Damn how does bunny boy read him like an open book- time to trauma dump. Maybe this is why people think he's gay /lhj. Man rabbit got some trauma of his own. HA even got big guy scared. Usagi is not impressed lmao. Casey to save crazy rhino. Raphs gonna slap him for that lmao. Uh oh. Lmao they're just in the window. Oh no. Ooh Leo's got the look in his eyes fr. Leo o(-( oo little spin move there. God Leo stop being such a hard ass o(-( move on. Crazy. Even splinter sees Usagi has a special bond with Leo. Hope I get to see him in more future episodes. Aw damn mikey lost all his comics- guess he'll have to train now lmao.

Answers to what you fool o(-( damn Leo. Maybe you should listen to your family dingdong. And your closest friend. Raph:( Leonardo dude.. guess he's getting shipped off- man the bros looks so concerned for him. Lmfao they called him a poopy face ha- Yeah he is a bit cranky. Think about the proper response. See! Think dumbass! Crazy to think he goes off on his own like this. Wow this little dude is uh? Something else lol. Did this dude really train yoshi? I have a feeling that's the plot twist. Why does this guy fart so much lmao. This is gonna be some journey for leo huh? Oh? Interesting. Finally all that just to comes to terms with something- well now I can only wonder if Leo will be back in time for the next event in new york. By the looks of it he's got a few episodes away first.

Oh. Yikes- Guess they aren't taking too easy to that. TWO MONTHS?? HELLO? That's so long:( what does kumquat mean?- shredder? No no wait karai. Dumb bitch. Oh shit. What are you doing in my house? What are you doing in my house???? /ref. Ugh foot scum. It's Karai bc she's dumb and a jerk. God damn you Karai. How is this honorable? HMMM? Damn all their stuff is totally gone after this:( how could you>:( damn you. Oh damn oh damn oh damn. Man o(-( honestly they probably should have stuck together. How were they preped underwater too- that more kitty:( it's so adorable how much mikey cares for klunk<3 damn- a bit much don't you think?- I love klunk a normal amount (lie) drilling out of here- damn can just never catch a break. Wow. Woooowwww. Great honor KARAI you asshat. >:( why is everyone so mean- um- what- what the fuck- WHAT. you know what I'm honestly surprised that she let april go. Honestly.

KICK HER ASS LEO. Ughhhhh I want to scream and pace around the rooommmm. Poor guys man:( just let them live in peace. I want my happily ever after please- aw leo found them all:) ughh leo leoooo why couldn't you just make this a supply run:/ wow leo a lot more noble than what I could have been- personally she didn't deserve mercy. I can only hope she uses this last chance for good. Though I can only have my doubts. Aw a gift :) how sweet.

I knew it. Bitch shop is part alien tech. Which is why he's even good at fighting in the first place. Oh god- Yeah I honestly for the worst for donnie everytime something gets destroyed. He puts so much time and effort into his work. Poor guy:( ewww what is that. Nasty. Agreed I too hate bugs- vile. Ewww. I might skip this one- ew didn't think I'd be getting nightmare fuel from tmnt but here we are ig- and I thought the krang stuff in rise was bad. Ain't seen nothing yet huh- Bug bite?? That can not be good. Isn't that alien language? I bet bishop has no issue hacking into any computer,, oh? April's uncle huh. Wow these people are fantastic. Is this real- in my 2003 tmnt? Peace? I see. Ofc it was too good to be true. How did she just remember all that- gross the bugs are back.

If baxter wasn't so absolutely insane I'd almost feel bad for him. Something bad happens to his mom doesn't it. Gross- ewww his finger. Dude you're like melting rn and you go to revenge?? Dude is deranged. You can't let your traumas define you stockman. So uh who's maning the helicopter? Man. *almost* feel bad. I love how donnie just steals stuff from the enemy every few mission's lmfao. Love that guy.

Omg donnie is a dinosaur guy. Woah they look so goofy. Okay he's been "under the weather" a couple times now. Holy shit what is this foreshadowing- nothing good I'm sure and probably something to do with that bug bite. Lmao they got scared. Wha- even splinter is fed up with their bull shit lmfao. Saved by a sneeze lmao. Also imagine if mikey actually changed history with the potato chips- think we scared it off? Nope. Think something really horrible is coming now? Yep. DUDE. LMAO. poor bros literally can't catch a break. Wow donnie! You've saved humanity! Again! (Except your brothers didn't die this time) ((man same as it never was goes insane-)) what. They just. They're just gone for 3 whole months. Damn- lmfao. They just be wildin ig.

Oh? Yoshi seeking revenge? Not exactly the honorable thing to do. Mikey lmfao. Raphs in trouble with splinter lmao. Story time story time!! Gender? Doesn't matter. Can you kick ass? -raph, probably. Yoshi is a natural so it seems. I wonder what happens to his friend in this. Aw. They are brothers now. Aw she cared for the rats. Tang<3 oop. Why does love have to get in the way of good relationships. They take the girl don't they. Mortu! Guardians hm? They are so going to take up the position anyways- more jealousy between the boys. Not gonna be good- Wouldn't they kinda be sister and brothers tho? Uh. He doesn't actually kill her over this right- Wooooww. Okay. That's lame dude. Shredder is just everywhere. Dude. All this over a girl. L. I wonder how old the ancient one is. Wow splinter is a reminder of failure- odd name. Interesting. Oh? What's he doing? What is this thing? Things? Huh o(-( oh boy. Sounds like trouble is nothing else.

What. What happened to donnie? Donnie and that massive brain of his. Saving the whole world and shit. Where Don then- Is that donnie? wow casey actually cleans up? Ah he's still sick. Hopefully this isn't some sort of horrible plot point. Surely he'll be totally fine. Damn poor Casey and April. They wanted to go out lmao. Never a break in new york city. They really do relentlessly bully mikey lmao. Ew god no. Tmnt is not immune to some light body horror huh. Oh boy they in area 51 fr. Did they save stockmen? Oh- bad idea dude- go get the guys o(-( why does he look like that? Ooo I wonder if that's where they got the idea for rise raphs plastron. Damn now they gotta fix donnie. I knew this cold was so much more than just a cold. Lmfao guess mikey isn't the biggest fan of case. Leo's just like. For fuck sake. Lmao. Raph deserves an F word pass from nick. Damn:( Leatherhead is so sweet dude. Geez. What do they do now? Wow. Bishop I to am going to ram my foot so far up your ass for this.

Damn bro. I mean plot armor and all ofc they get him back. INVISIBLE FLOOR TILES? (DR/UT reference) I kinda thought this was gonna be a call from the boys. So uh. Who's this bastard? Karai why are you so annoying. It's funny to see area 51 talked about outside of that one 2019? 2020? 'Storming' of area 51 lol. Hell yeah "convince" this bitch. (I hate him with a passion). Wait did the cloaked thing have to do with the basement things from ancient one? At least see what the hell is wants first o(-( how do we know he will actually help donnie? Ughhhh. DONT YOU DARE. God I hate bishop. Man this has got to be rough for leo. And the rest of them ofc. They can't just leave donnie with these monsters:( bishop really is making a deal with the devil. He is so evil. Ofc he lied. What an asshole. They're busting in to foot hq (again) uh oh. The things they're about to do for donnie- I wish people cared about me to even a faction of that degree lmao. Oh? Did the element dudes send the message? God bishop is so fucking annoying. Raphs gonna have fun with this one. "Crud" please just let them say fuck. Lmao. Man can they really handle this alone? And without that one sword. Interesting. This whole thing is one big confusion. BOOM. What does it do? Fucking communicate maybe 💀 are the elite magic? Oh? Interesting. LMAO RAPH. Uh oh. This ain't good. Dude. Talk maybe? Tell him what it is even?? Say how horrible bishop is perhaps??? Ofc they fulfilled their side. Anything for their brother. I hate this guy so much. At least explain what it does. Let's fucking go leatherhead!! Brilliant!! What a fantastic character LH is. Totally not much trouble at all. Certainly. If it were not for LH and donnie getting mutated (again) none of that containing the outbreak would have been possible. Wait? So what did that do then? Set the elements free? Yeah. Welp they're smart I'll give them that. Omg they're gonna bring that blob back?? Oh shitttt.

Magic tree man? Self healing magic tree man? With honor?? Uh? Maybe? "You tried to eat my leg" lmfao mikey is so offended by that. Even with all the angsty chaos I'm glad there's still lots of humor in this show. (Probably the only thing that keeps me coming back lmao. I couldn't handle pure angst. 2003 mikey I'm convinced absolutely enjoys wearing dresses. Or at the least flowy clothing. OOP- raph just tackles him off the building- ooo. It's interesting what they are able to build (and then build again-) down under new york. Oh? Ancient one? Again? What has begun again? Aww. They are brothers your honor. Oop. Doesn't feel too good anymore. Hm. Lmao mikey is just goofing off. It's hilarious how they play back. I can only assume these are those elemental guys? I wonder why they're doing this? Did they just want to beat them up? Oh? Where are they gonna take them? Interesting? Sounds a little odd too pin them against each other though if you need warriors you would think you'd want them all alive. Aw. We love good dad splinter. So confused. Hm. Where are these other four from then? I am beyond confused. OOOO WAIT will the brothers get their mystic powers (or 03s equivalent anyways) through this? Why does splinter need to save them? What do they know that the bros don't? Why is this show so bat shit crazy and confusing o(-(

One more season down. Honestly. I'm not sure what my favorite episodes are. I certainly like some more than others though. And I definitely and not looking forward to this being all over.

Oh I see. So they've gotten like save the entire universe again I see. Honestly I'd say, even as weird as they are, they're like the utroms and possible on the good side. Wait why exactly do they look like the shredder then? Or how would the shredder know of them then? Where's the fifth? Looks like there should be a fifth? And the underside down foot symbol? OMG DONNIE you nerd /affectionate. I can definitely see some reference taken from here for rise. This show wildin. Fr. They really just go head first into any fight huh. Bro joi is gone- Um. Okay. Um. Uh.. alrighty then! Wow this show is a lot!

Starting to look like being a skilled ninja is not all that cool anymore lmao. Donnie is a man of science and does not understand this dude lmao. Damn it mikey o(-( "oops" DUDE this show omg. Anri for raph. Inazuma for Mikey. Byakko for donnie. Banrai for raph actually? Wait what happened to Leo's? Wait what about leo D: mike. I swear. BRO IS A FUCKING BEYBLADE?! Don is a tornado. So Leo can just use others weapons? Orrr not- My oh my does this just like. Wow.

I am blinking rapidly. Alright so saki was a good guy at one point? Is this the like same blob we are talking about here?? Wow. Well. I think this is enough confusion for one night I'll pick this back up in the morning. I viewed the thumbnails for the upcoming seasons. It seems season 7 sees an art style change? And we are left on a cliff hanger. I'm honestly not sure if it's worth continuing. So the odd look humans are now god like fantastic. Wait he just becomes a dragon? How does he recover from this to go to new york?- dragon fight! (I- I guess) so I'm guessing the boys will have to learn to form laser beams out of their hands too.

So are we gonna ever get am explanation as to why Leo never got his weapon? Come on raph I've seen you become a beyblade you've got this. It makes sense how donnie got it so easily but Leo? Not getting it? Aw they really needed that support. Damn. Poor splinter:( aw donnie is just talking about his projects back home. Mikey is just sonic now. I wonder what they all will become. Leo? Also a dragon! I knew it. This still doesn't explain why he doesn't get a weapon lmao. Woah. Just the projector image of Leo's dragon melts them- It seems they wanted them to take all the pieces. In all fairness it does seem kinda dumb to keep them all together.

Dude what happened to being immortal? And like. Shouldn't they have some form of communication to tell the others to stop? Devour of dreams? Sounds like a kirby boss. So the sword was meant for leo? This is so strange. Did he know he was going to die this whole time? What. How did that just happen? Damn. They really can't have shit huh?😭 the five gumbas lmao. So they just totally killed that quiet "immortal" guy. Why did they get the most annoying voices lmao. Bro :'0 dude. What the fuck man o(-( kinda lame how these all powerful ninjas were taken out so quickly. Oh? 03 leo has portal powers too? (Sorta)

I'm gonna be honest. Despite a few small things (and how hard leo is on himself) I absolutely adore the 03 gang. I'm disappointed it's all serious shit all the time though. Sure there's a bit of goofing around and such. But not at the same level I was under the impression I'd get. I suppose this is a different iteration. Some people actually prefer the silliness to stay very limited. I don't know. I guess litte mx. doesn't like violence should stay out of cartoons with lots of action hm?

Lmfao mikey was so ready for this day. God why don't they just say sparring or training or just like roaming around idk- I've read one too many fanfics to take "blowing off steam with _" seriously o(-( man last thing we need is nanobots in stockmens hands. See silly little episodes<3 limited fighting for their lives at least-

Ah. Terrifying. Karai? Right what is she doing here? Feels like a bit of a time skip- right a dream. I've always known Karai had good in her. See this is the kind of shit that happens when chaos wins the splatfest. Smh. Damn it Karai. Welp. Guess you die now. Damn well. Looks like saving donnie is the end of the world but him dying is also the apocalypse. Interesting. Don't. Don't mercy this thing. Don't. No. Ugh. She fell for it. Damn starting to hate this things more than bishop. How are they gonna banish the shredder again tho? After all of this is finished? If the ninja tribunal had to watch over his body forever won't they suffer the same fate? But how? Dude was dead o(-( how does that work?

[teyvattherapist]

7, 17, 22, and 24 for the interview questions? both ohm and sandrone

Ah yes. More opinions from them, questionable.

7 - Who do you look up to?

"Many people have aided me on my journey and all are noteworthy of their own accord. Though if I were to choose one person, perhaps Xiao. The yaksha, for all of our differences, has always been there for I. We are very similar and yet entirely different, it leads to a mutual understanding of sorts. Though, I can only hope to match his prowess some day."

17 - What makes you laugh?

"I find I quite enjoy watching Master Diluc and Sir Kaeya arguing, they care for one another and yet they throw the silliest insults. It's the unawareness that gets me I believe. I also like puns in general, I find them very.. Punny.."

22 - What’s the easiest way to flirt with you?

"A flustering question. I'm not entirely sure, I've seen many people try admittedly, but not much has piqued my fancy in terms of flirtatious gestures. Though, I suppose just saying what you want is a good way to do it. No beating around the bush that way."

24 - What would you consider your main love language(s)?

"Giving would more than likely be words of affirmation and physical touch. You must understand, I do not have a lot of time. In my previous relationship I tended to leave affirming notes on the bathroom mirror. It's the little things, right? Receiving is acts of service or quality time. As social as I am, I'd prefer nothing more than a quiet dinner in my office."

7 - Who do you look up to?

"Tartaglia is my closest friend in my line of work. My only friend actually. Most of the relationships I form are fake, but at least I know I have him to count on. As such it is only natural I look up to him of all people. Everything he does these days is for his family, and while there are times I find his methods stupid his cause is honourable. He's very young to put so much on his plate, and yet here he is." 17 - What makes you laugh?

"A good joke I suppose. Whenever my job requires me to. I'm not sure. I don't really think about what exactly is making me laugh when I do. Though, watching Tartaglia run smack into Scaramouche's hat has brought me to tears in the past. They're so useless." 22 - What’s the easiest way to flirt with you?

"Don't." 'Sandrone give a proper response.' "Fine, uh. I find courting pointless. Get right to it without being sexual off the bat preferably. I must admit I question your choice in men if you wish to flirt with me. What a question. What's next? Can we go to the next one?" 24 - What would you consider your main love language(s)?

"I am traveling constantly and there are times I'm deep undercover for months. As much as I'd love to spend time with a partner, I simply don't have any to spare. I tend to give gifts, besides books I don't spend my Harbinger salary on anything else, may as well put it to use some way or another. I've been told I'm very good with acts of service as well. Anything you need, I will do my best to provide. As it should be. I like receiving words of affirmation and handmade gifts I suppose. They feel more personal."

[reallyromealone]

Hello! How are you? I hope your good! I have a request and it’s ok if you ignore it :)) I was hoping I could get a reader with uncanny Valley vibes X bonten. If you don’t know uncanny valley is the feeling you get when something looks human but just seems like it Isn’t. So like kinda the reader has eyes that stare into your soul and don’t reflect light, or the reader seems like they have one to many teeth so when they smile it’s really creepy and there bones make loud snapping sounds like there breaking when they stand up after sitting for to long or they have completely silent footsteps, or no matter what there always extremely cold :) if you don’t want to do this it’s ok! I hope you have a good day! I’m sending you happy vibes :) <33

Boo, I'm gonna need those good vibes because the bullshit I'm dealing with smh

Going to an 80s themed party in a few weeks and fuck my aunts gonna be there and she's gonna be bleh.

Also me?? Fun fact I'm not allowed to go to my mom's shows because my resting face is "unsettling" according to my mom

♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

One place Bonten as a collective dreaded going was to meet up with the information brokers meeting spots.

Why do you ask? Why do these men dread going there?

Because of (name) (last name).

He was fucking weird.

Like he was normal but... Incorrect in a way?

Like he just looked not human but he was?

His eyes lacked that light people had like they never saw it reflect light, hell mikeys eyes were black but they still reflected light!

Not to mention they have never heard the sound of him walking it was fucking weird, even on gravel!

"Hello gentlemen" (name) said with a too perfect smile, his teeth unatrually white as the smile didn't quite reach his eyes "hello (name)" Koko said trying to seem not unsettled by this horror movie of a man "do you have it?"

"I sure do, do you have what I want?"

Ran was silent beside Koko as he snapped his fingers and one if their goons presented a briefcase, snapping it open to show 1.2 million dollars in not coded diamonds "oh how lovely" (name) said unblinking, something he did often with that same monotone but pitched voice.

"So we have a deal?"

"I believe we do"

(Name) kept his unblinking stare and eerie grin as he offered his hand to be shook, the Bonten men reluctant but shook it and like every time it was frigid.

"Glad to do business"

The men left, (name) still making no sound as he left and the moment they got into Bontens park limo Ran snapped "I am not doing that shit again!"

"Well one of us has to!" Mochi snapped back "the guy isnt right! And that's saying something!"

"Next time Sanzu can handle it then" Mikey said calmly, masking well how weirded out he was by (name), last time they met was at a restaurant he never saw him eat but food was vanishing off his plate.

It was weird as hell.

[csbinnie]

SOMEONE PRETENDS TO BE YOUR FRIEND JUST TO FLIRT WITH TXT

REQ . . may i request txt reaction to someone flirting with txt in front their s/o? or maybe their s/os best friend flirting with txt when their s/o is not around, bUT WHEN S/O IS AROUND THIS FRIEND ACT REALLY FALSELY LIKE,,,, “hEYY CUTE^^ YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE TOGETHER” lol i freaked out a little at the end sorry<

˒ i hate people like this ugh. so this was v cathartic to write LMAO

YEONJUN

he is kind of a flirty person, but he would never ever do anything to make you doubt your relationship. he’s such a loyal boyfriend, honestly, so he would act completely different around your fake friend. he doesn’t talk to her unless absolutely necessary. unfortunately, this doesn’t deter her, to the point that one day she comes over and, as she’s gushing about his hair, starts running her fingers through it. that’s when he decides he has to be really clear and probably hurt her feelings.

“listen, you can’t do stuff like this. i’m sorry, but i already have an s/o. i don’t need another one.”

SOOBIN

he would honestly be so confused. like he knows what she’s doing, but he doesn’t understand how she could ever think it would work??? lmao. i think bin would be the most uncomfortable member. he just doesn’t know what to do because he hates being rude to people, but he also can’t stand this hoe and wants her to leave him alone smh. seeing him so anxious whenever she comes over would make you so upset, and honestly this whole situation would probably end with a confrontation between you and her. at this point you’re upset on soobin’s behalf more than yours.

“thank you, y/n,” poor bin would be so relieved and thankful. (and he also kind of thinks you’re hot when you’re angry, so… it’s a win win). “i’m so glad we don’t have to talk to her anymore.”

BEOMGYU

he would shut that shit down IMMEDIATELY. he hates fakes, but he hates fakes who hurt your feelings even more. he would just not indulge her AT ALL. no matter how bubbly she acts around him or the two of you, he’s dead faced and monotone. it usually goes something like this:

ur bitch ass friend: omg gyu you’ve gotten sooo tall since we last hung out! y/n is sooo lucky :(

gyu: omg yeah they are (-_-)

aaaannd *silence*

TAEHYUN

tae knows exactly what she’s doing, but he kind of just thinks it’s funny. he mostly ignores her, but sometimes he likes to say something funny just to jab back at her because honestly, anyone out to hurt you is like an insult on his part too. you’re in this together so he takes that stuff personally.

pick me girl: tae can you help me get this off the shelf? it’s sooo high and i’m so small i can’t reach it :(

ur bf: huh that is high :/

LIKE HE WOULD NOT INDULGE HER AT ALL

HUENINGKAI

okay, don’t hate him for it, but kai honestly wouldn’t even notice. he’s just too oblivious to notice your friend’s weird behavior LMAO. like he honestly just thinks she’s really friendly and probably always walks away from conversations with her like: wow! she was so nice! like it would never click for him that she could be flirting or being fake until he notices how angry/sad you are after every interaction. after that, he would avoid her like the plague because of how awkward he feels around her. you’re the only one for him and he thought that was obvious smh.

[cheelduh]

How to bet your way into someone’s heart. (Highschool AU)

Pairing: Childe x fem!reader

Warnings: Fake weed. Poor Signora smh. Oh yes, lots of swearing. UNEDITED ASF IM LAZY BYE.

Synopsis: Childe is being an infatuated idiot, Lisa has eyes for vending machine chocolate, and Kaeya is desperately in need of a pencil. With all these distractions, there’s no way in hell you’ll be able focus on the task at hand.

This is crack.

I don’t have time.

You think as you race down the hallway, shoes slapping against the floor as you expertly dodge multiple students in your way.

Bullet. You're as fast as a bullet, because everyone around you is a blur and you don't stop, can't stop, not until you meet your target.

It's funny how one can accomplish many challenges and feats they were unable to, merely due to pressure. Pressure is a twisted ugly thing that can gnaw its way into the pit of your stomach and grow like a parasite. Pressure is a parasite that can either bring the best in you, or the worst, but at the cost of one's peace of mind.

"Move it Signora!" You shouted a warning at the senior blocking your way. There wasn't any time for you slow down at that point, and you'd risk bumping into the breakfast club's stall if you swerved to the side, sending juice flying everywhere.

Signora's eyes widened momentarily, getting the gist albeit her anger, and choosing to back up flatly against the locker.

Her lipstick nearly slips from her fingers as you swerve past, a thick gust of wind in your wake.

It messes with the hair she woke up two hours early for.

Signora plots her revenge. You still don't have time.

You nearly kick the door to your home room down, but you can't risk the perfect image your teachers have of you. So you pat down your t-shirt, take five tempting deep breaths, and tentatively knock the door.

The door opens and you're met with a young man, familiar amber pupils welcoming you.

You try not to huff and puff at the cost of your stamina. Thinking back, there's no way in hell you could have physically been that fast.

"Good morning Y/N," Your homeroom teacher gives you a small smile, moving aside to let you in. "Class is just about to start."

You check your watch, then turn to him with an apologetic tone, trying not to crack under the eyes of your classmates. "I'm so sorry Mr.Zhongli, I slept through my alarm."

Your idiot ass forgot to set one because you studied till four in the morning.

"You're like thirty seconds late, cut the shit." Beidou boos from the back, causing your stance to stiffen.

"I don't wanna hear it Beidou. If anything, you're two periods earlier than usual." Ningguang calls her out for you, but you have a feeling it's more so on behalf of a personal vendetta.

Ignoring the two bickering, Mr.Zhongli gives you the handout. "Take a seat. Do not fret over such minuscule things dear."

Relief washes over you. Your impeccable attendance is not on the line.

Childe tries to flag you down next to him but you send him a pointed glare and sit next to Lisa instead.

"You should give him a chance you know." Lisa doesn't even have to open her eyes to know what's going on.

"Please," You scoff, digging through your bags to collect your notes. "As if I have the time to fool around with a shady kid like him."

Your friend sighs in disapproval, and makes no move to take out her own notes as Mr.Zhongli begins the lecture on the Archon war.

"You should really pay attention." It bothers you that she doesn't, but then again it's not your place to tell her what to do or not to do.

"I don't need to." She yawns, blinking an eye open towards you. "I have you after all."

"I'm tired of saving your ass." You groan and pull a pen out of your pocket to get started on the exercises as Mr.Zhongli talks in the background.

The course outline contained all the topic, and you made sure to teach yourself as much as you could before class to stay ahead.

Immersed in the worksheet, you blinked away your sleep and tried to answer as many questions as you could at the moment. You didn't hear the slight shift next to you, and the change of breathing, or the rate of which time went by.

A familiar scent makes its way into your nostrils.

"Lisa. Why do you smell like mango juul juice." You know the scent from when Signora blew a mango flavoured fog in your face yesterday at lunch when you said you were hungry.

A chuckle erupts and you freeze in place. "That's because I'm not Lisa."

You blink. Once, twice, and then crane your head to the side to meet a pair of teasing cerulean eyes.

Fingers loosening in shock, the pen drops on the desk with a short thud.

You whisk your head towards the front of the classroom, and Mr.Zhongli is nowhere to be seen.

"There's no saving you now." Childe's smirk widens, and he scoots closer to you. "Mr.Zhongli had to get something from the staff room. The staff room is near the cafeteria."

"Which is also near the merch stall." You grumbled, bringing both hands to massage your temples as a headache is beginning it's reign.

"Tsk tsk. Smart girl. I'd like to add that he's forgotten his wallet in his office as well, which is in the south wing."

"Son of a..." You mutter underneath your breath, and opt to scoot further back, but your efforts are futile because your desk is in a corner.

Your next beacon of hope is Lisa, so you scan the room full of chattering students, only to find her pestering her crush, Jean.

Shit...there's nothing getting you out of this one.

"What did it take?" Is your only question, the despair starting to brew. How much did it take for your best friend to betray you?

"A dollar and fifty for vending machine chocolate."

You take a moment to breathe, calming your nerves and burying down the urge to screech. "What will it take?"

"For what?" Childe replies back innocently, and you can't believe how fast he can change masks. You almost give in.

"For you to leave me alone."

"Aww come on girlie," He whines, closing in the distance. "Don't be so cold."

What did your mom tell you that one time? Oh yes. That if you were ever backed against a wall, then just break the damn thing down.

Too bad it's figurative. You're just about ready to sock him in the face if you didn't know he was into that sort of thing.

"I'm serious about you," He says, and it sounds so real, so genuine, nearly makes you sputter. "See? I've even bought school supplies.

He unzips his light backback and spills the contents on the table.

A lone piece of paper flies out, a lighter, and a mechanical pencil with no lead that follows straight after. There's also a pocket knife that you choose to ignore.

You're not the least bit surprised.

"First of all, how the fuck are you passing this class. Second, do you really think I'm into nerds?"

"Well, considering that you are a nerd—"

"You're making things worse."

"My bad, my bad." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "But on a serious note. I'll do anything."

You cross your arms. "I'm not just another one of your conquests Childe. It's not like I have the time. There are better things to do."

"You need to relax." He says so simply, with complete disregard as to what you are trying to say.

"I am relaxed." You reply, picking up your pen to continue your work. If he's going to annoy you, then you might as well get shit done while he's at it.

You're not wasting any more time.

"When was the last time you got a full eight hours of sleep?" His voice is soft, too soft, and it's not at all like the Childe you know.

Your pen stops momentarily, but you will yourself to continue writing. The words look fumbled, but you don't care. The best thing to do is get your work done and ignore the idiot next to you.

"C'mon, Zhongli won't be back for another half an hour at least. Let's go." He kicks the bottom of your chair to urge you.

The pen shakes in your hand, and you narrow your eyes at the paper, digging holes into poor question eight. "I'm trying to work here. Let me work." You'll say anything to get him off your back.

"Fine fine fine..." He raises both hands in mock surrender. "I'll stop bothering you."

Your ears perk up at that, and you turn to him so fast he has to hold in his laugh. "Really?"

"Yeah," Childe nods along, bringing your hopes up. "If you win a bet, that is." And they're back to ocean level.

You roll your eyes. There's always a catch. That doesn't mean you're any less interested.

"What's the bet?" You ask curiously, all your focus now on him. Just as he longed for from the very start.

He flicks a thumb towards the door, leaning closer to whisper next to your ear. "We bet when Zhongli comes back."

"Are you kidding me?" You aren't bothered at all at the close proximity, mainly because you're too tired and only care about the freedom that will come with your win.

Childe, however, is a completely different story. His heart is beating a thousand times a second, but his face doesn't show it. Not one bit.

Kaeya leans in from the seat behind you two, interested in what's going on. "Ooooh secrets."

"Shut up Kaeya." Childe and you monotonously drone in sync, still having your little staring contest.

The captain of the skating team smiles, about to ask—

"No. We don't have an extra pencil. Even if we did we wouldn't give it to you." Childe finally breaks his gaze to scare off Kaeya.

Kaeya raises a smug brow, and leans back in his chair like the jerkwad he is. "Then don't let me keep you two love birds."

That's all it takes for him to earn Childe's unwavering respect and loyalty for as long as he lives.

After the two are done creating an elaborate handshake as a mark of their newfound friendship, you decide to just forget about the handout. It's not like you're getting anything done anyways.

"Anyways, back to the bet." Childe says, resting his cheek on his fist as he stares at you dreamily. You try not to break under his gaze.

"If I win, you have to go on a date with me."

"No way in hell—"

"Then I'll bother you for the rest of highschool."

Highschool is eternity. You don't want to live through an eternity of this.

"Fine." You answer, and for the first time he sees genuine fear in your face, it makes him waver slightly. Not enough for him to pity you.

"If I win..." You trail, thinking loud and clear as you ignore the excited chatter of your classmates. "I want you to pay attention to class."

"What?" He exclaims incredulously, blinking in disbelief. "I thought you'd get me to stop talking to you altogether."

"If you're paying attention in class, you don't bother me as much and your grades go up." You grin smartly, and oh archons it livens his entire day up, and it's only nine in the morning.

"You care about my grades?" Childe bites back a smile.

"Not at all." You lie, and quickly look away. Woah the floor tile looking trippy.

He decides it's better to get on with the bet without causing you any more distress. After all, you've given him such cute facial expressions today. He's feeling quite generous.

Pulling out his cracked-as-shit latest model phone, he unlocks it and tinkers with it a bit before turning the screen towards you.

"We'll be using this to time both of our predictions at the same time. Whoever has the closer time to when he finally swings by is the winner." The rules are simply put, no room for error.

You tilt your head in confusion. "Why am I seeing a slime review?"

"SHIT!" Childe fumbles with his phone, aggressively tapping on the screen. He lowers his head and voice as if he's been through fifty consecutive hits in the face. "It's uh, Teucer's account."

"Yeah...okay." Is all you can say.

"Ok what do you bet?" He changes the topic to unfuck the situation.

Putting a finger in your chin, you think for a minute, calculating the average of all the times Mr.Zhongli has left the classroom for a considerable amount of time.

"Fifteen minutes." You're sure of it. It's like clockwork every day.

"Hmm..." Childe crosses his arms, seemingly in deep thought. "Five minutes." He places his bet, and both timers start simultaneously.

Five minutes?! Is he serious?

You laugh inwardly. This challenge is in the bag.

The sense of victory you feel dulls when your ears pick up the echo of footsteps nearing the classroom.. Both your heads snap up to the doors.

There's something scary about Childe once his competitive side comes out. "Looks like I've won." He turns to you, eyes darkening evilly.

"What? There's no way in hell a ginger is right." Your palms are clammed up, eyebrows furrowed in panic. You calculated every single variable, how could this be?

You race to the front, Childe right on your tail as the entire class clamps up. The footsteps get louder, causing even whispers to become total silence.

Then it hits you. The shitty music about getting bitches and bars playing on the other side.

The door is swung open by Childe, and you're face to face with an idiot sophomore with a speaker in his pocket.

Childe’s grin is long gone, and you sigh in relief.

The false alarm encourages the class to return back to their idle chatter.

"Scaramouche?" Childe spits, narrowing his eyes at the unamused boy. "I thought it was Signora's shift today."

By "shift" he means being a complete dickwad and scamming fake weed to students in return for their souls. It only really works on the freshmen.

The only reason the club still runs is because Signora threatened the principal with some sus pictures she snapped of him and his assistant.

"Apparently she had an emergency." Scaramouche explains, lowering the volume on his outdated beats pill. "Something about a hair appointment because she got ran into by a, and I quote "lecherous imbecile.""

You steer clear of the conversation, finding the whiteboard far more fascinating and worth your while.

A loud cough is heard from behind the kid, and you're met with a crestfallen look on your beloved teacher's face.

You go through a whiplash of emotions, becoming completely numb towards your loss.

"They were out of slow cooked bamboo shoot soup." He sighs, handing a stack of papers to Childe, who is wearing the fattest smirk on his face at his victory. "Please hand these out to your classmates Childe, and we will begin shortly."

You check down at the timer despite knowing who’s won. Five minutes and twenty five seconds. Somehow, you don't feel as dejected as you thought you'd feel.

Maybe the date will be fun. Maybe Childe isn't so bad. Maybe...you do have time to indulge in these sort of things. If he’s so hell bent on getting your attention, perhaps it’s possible that you can make some room in your heart for him.

However, all those thoughts fly out the window when Childe hands you the new worksheet.

“I hope you're ready for our date tomorrow. We'll be sparring till sundown, and after you’ll be feeding me with chopsticks." He winks, and it makes your heart flip even though all you want right now is to go to the bathroom and barf your guts out.

Feelings are complicated.

You smile back at him nauseously, tight lipped and all, then you pull out your phone, go on maps, and search for the closest cliffs to jump off of.

After he's done, Childe slouches back in his original seat with a different kind of enthusiasm, and opens up his messages. He texts Zhongli a "thank you <3".

[why-this-kolaveri-machi]

it wasn’t power i coveted; it was acceptance.

Titans 3.06

y’know, i was just thinking the other day that 1.06/1.07 and 2.06/2.07 were the best episodes of their respective seasons, so i have great hopes going in to this one. fingers crossed!

as always, typing this up as i see the episode.

SPOILERS AHEAD

1. oh! um... that was a Cold Open, all right. *nudges* get it? cold? because it’s snowing? and two people got murdered in cold blood? eh?

... oh, i’ve just started.

1.5. i wonder if “i want to be sipping pina coladas on a beach with you” is the new “i’m just one day away from retiring.” i was so on edge after that--i kept expecting that car to explode. even so, the way they died wasn’t an anticlimax: brutal, and quick. 

1.75. so i’m assuming that’s the titular lady vic! this show better bring up why this doll was important or why these two cops needed to be killed, and not leave it to the ether like jericho’s little mindscape jaunt in 2.08 (i’m still dying to know what that was about???)

2.

i love how deliberately unappealing wayne manor is. 

(sorry for the pic quality. i don’t have hbo max! ssshhh.)

2.3. i love the many references to “home” and “our house” when they’ve been here for less than a week and saw one of their friends get blown into pieces. i mean, i unironically love it: home is where family is, after all!

2.5. i’d like to say that kom is playing some sort of long game here, especially given the build-up we had last season and some of the more niggling details this season: why did kom choose now to use her bond to lure kory when she’s been on earth for months? why did justin call kory now, just around the time that she started getting kom’s visions? and what about kom’s ability to exactly imitate other people? hmmm.

2.75. the reason i wrote i’d like to say is that i’ve made the mistake of assuming plot complexity where there is none; i was so invested in the jason todd orchestrated his own death theory for instance, when it turns out that oops! ra’s al ghul just happened to leave a little lazarus puddle in gotham, and oh yeah! scarecrow just happens to have a network of henchmen working for him on the outside and a fully functional laboratory and a weapons cache fit for a new supervillain in the basement of the high security psychiatric unit/prison that he’s in! 

(no i’m not bitter, why do you ask)

2.8. iiiii don’t know what to say about the implications of sex slavery being a thing on tamaran, so i’m not going to say anything at all. for now.

3. gotham, six years ago... wasn’t it five years before s2 that jericho died and the titans disbanded? and when was the flashback from 1.06 where dick let zucco die? i think it was after the events of 2.08: jericho? i can’t seem to find any transcripts or reliable information online, so i’m going to have to rewatch 1.06 at some point. 

(i love the old-fashioned batman music in this heist scene)

3.5. “security is a joke... it’s my way of keeping my dad on his toes”. what you’re an ethical thief now, like an ethical hacker? i don’t think that excuse is going to sell, barbara, on the day you do encounter a decent security system and your father is forced to arrest you.

(then again, gotham’s security is piss-poor. did you know that you could just walk into arkham asylum without any official clearance, ply one of its most dangerous inhabitants with contraband, and said inmate could get away with having an entire laboratory and weapons cache--NO I’M NOT GOING TO LET THIS GO)

3.8 so that flashback between dick and barbara was really cute! and also illuminating:

a) dick sounds so light, so... um. look. i have some apologies to tender to mr thwaites, because while i’ve always thought he does a fine job as dick grayson, i’ve never been terribly fond of his cadence as he delivers dialogue. it’s often monotonous, i thought, but then again, he’s usually delivering exposition or dealing with one soul-crushing crisis or the other. so i was pleasantly surprised to hear dick sound so carefree and alive in his conversation with barbara, laughing frequently, his emotions so bare and bubbling to the surface. it’s really a fantastic contrast to the traumatised and world-weary dick grayson that we see now, even more so than the costume department just bunging a backwards-baseball cap on mr thwaites’ head and hoping that will convince us of his relative youth. 

b) and god, when he wakes up from that memory, all alone in his bed, bleeding from bullet holes in his shoulder (bullet holes that are--in a somewhat convoluted way--barbara’s fault)? yikes. it’s great. you have my apologies, mr thwaites!

c) can you imagine dick just... crawling back to wayne manor, trying not to be seen by anybody, shedding his suit and just... collapsing onto his bed without even tending to his wound? the sheer emotional and physical exhaustion of it? 

d) it’s so interesting to see how barbara and dick approach the idea of legacy--a big theme on the show!--in this flashback. barbara is the one bucking the idea that she should follow in her father’s footsteps, while dick seems pretty content with the batman-and-robin setup, and even tries to get barbara to join their team (robin-girl. pfffft). obviously after this several traumatic things happen wherein dick ends up questioning and then resenting his role as robin, his relationship with batman or even returning as a vigilante at all. and barbara... ends up replacing her father as commissioner. it’s tragic, really. 

e) the dynamic between dick and barbara in the flashback reminds me of how it was between dick and donna in 1.08 and even between kory and dick in early s1. it’s like having an older, strong-willed woman by his side means he gives over the steering wheel for a while and lets himself... unspool, a little bit. it’s kinda endearing.

also:

*pinches his cheeks*

3. you know, we talk about dick and Eldest Daughter Syndrome, and that’s definitely valid, but here gar seems to me the embodiment of it, with all the emotional gardening and firefighting that he’s expected to do. he’s kind of the guy expected to keep his shit together and take care of everyone else while they are falling completely to pieces, unable to carve out time to process his own trauma. he’s also picked up dick’s and kory’s tendencies to bottle up their struggles and shun appearing vulnerable, and he’s struggling in the shadow of both dick and kory undergoing acute crises, his best friend (and frequent confidante) on the other side of the world, and seeing hank die, utterly helpless to stop it. 

i’m glad that he got a chance to tell dick even a smidgeon of what he really feels, and i hope this is at least a semblance of a wake up call for dick to actually sit down and work with the people he repeatedly calls family.

3.5. it’s heartening to see that dick immediately makes it his priority to go talk to gar. but don’t blow off kory in the process, man!

4. i’m really loving this dynamic between kom and conner--i get the idea that both of them consider each other as Unknowns, alien two times over. but conner’s only ever known the titans, who embrace being different, and kom’s only ever known... well. 

anyway, kory is Really Stressed, and honestly? #relatable. 

when you’re forced to bring an estranged family member to hang out with your friends...

4.5. i love that the titans are spending so much time in the kitchen. a real family!

5. jonathan crane is a creep and i absolutely cannot stand him.

5.25. how did he get a whole lab setup (in the basement of a hospital...?) with a bunch of whitecoats to work for him? how did he just waltz into the viewing room of an operation theatre when he’s one of the most wanted men in gotham right now? why is jason wandering around maskless when--presumably--as the adopted son of the most famous person in gotham he’d be a tad more recognisable than your average joe?

why do i expect this show to answer anything anymore?

5.5. that’s not necessarily a criticism, mind; i’ve said since season 1 that titans is very comics-like in this aspect, all about the Aesthetic and the splash-page splendour rather than the niggling unimportant details of how or when the characters got to said location. like. the camera gliding over the operation being set-up, lady vic bursting in and doing her murder dance (imagine the luck of the poor intern who chose this day and this surgery to assist) and jason, shocked and slack-jawed, framed by blood.

5.75. it’s a sobering reminder for jason that, though he chose this path in order to gain control over a world that seemed like it was rapidly spinning out of his grip, he’s only succeeded in handing over even more control to a man with an agenda that is very clearly not aligned with his own. he’s in too far to stop now, though.

5.9. i have a lot more thoughts about jason! saving it up for the end of this recap, though.

6. more kitchen time! i better see dick do some cooking soon...

(”our kitchen”! it still delights me! kitchens are So Important)

6.25. so much of dick’s issues have revolved around his relationship with bruce, so it’s completely understandable that in the wake of a huge crisis where bruce literally asks dick to replace him and be a “better” him, dick would default to all the worst things he learned from the man. and i’m glad kory’s having none of it, but come on, guys. the woman’s literally fetched her fratricidal sister out of a hole in the ground with no idea what said sister is going to do next and experiencing a burgeoning sense of guilt far, far beyond her history with the titans, and dick’s too far into his autocolonoscopy that he can’t see that she needs help.

6.5. “he services your urges”--well, as far as we know, kory is the last person he had sex with...

7. “i hope [gar] isn’t angry with me...” SIR! i thought you’d already spoken to him! smh, as the kids say. kory wouldn’t be needing to reassure you if you just took the effort to build two way emotional relationships with the rest of the team. @superohclair​ was taking about dick’s relatively low emotional intelligence? i agree.

7.5. “i got my own problems [...] you and barbara? fix it.” YOU TELL HIM, KORY

8. man i really like this weird, sad tension between dick and barbara--this sense that both of them are approaching the other based on how they remember them and are ultimately disappointed by the truth. barbara thought she could trust dick to... well, be a better batman, but dick has not only failed at that in her eyes, but repeatedly undermined her while exploiting the authority that she gave him. in dick’s eyes, this is nothing like the barbara that he knew, rebellious and ready to do whatever it takes to find something. 

like. this show sometimes really hits me in the chest about the ways it shows kids grow into adults and into caretakers, and the way it’s stop-start, the ways nothing can happen at all for a long time and then it’s Crisis Central all at once and there’s no space to breathe. the weird sort of sadness that comes with nostalgia. 

8.5. oracle name drop! i agree with barbara, any system that can just randomly tap into gotham phonelines is a monster.

8.7. (i don’t know if it’s my imagination, but is dick holding himself... differently in this episode? like that wound is definitely bothering him, and he’s running on fumes)

9. man, that was a really sweet scene between kom and conner. “feeling alien in your own world”... “not quite here nor there”

honestly this team runs on conner and gar’s faith in their value as a family, and it’s a sign of conner’s generous heart that he extends that opportunity to blackfire. this arc of maturation for him, where he’s now able to consciously choose which parts of himself he can use to do the thing he wants to so--save people--has been so fulfilling to recognise. this baby’s grown with the titans! and what he’s learnt is that people can get fucked up, but the titans is a place where they can be fucked up, and grow.

MY MAN CONNER

10. oh man i’m drinking in the gar-dick interaction in this episode like i’m three days into the desert and it’s the only source of water for miles around!

a) gar is absolutely not dealing with dick’s bullshit this episode and I LOVE IT. it’s such a far cry from the man who was idolising dick/robin back in s1 and expecting him to solve all their problems. dick is fallible, dick is fucked up, but he Tries His Best and that’s ok.

b) dick, huffing and puffing through that vent, unable to put any pressure on his left shoulder, trying to have a heart to heart with gar... fuck i love this asshole. 

c) bruce took in a kid who was suffering... “and made him into a weapon”. well. i absolutely agree with dick that it was bruce who put these kids into these horrible situations with him and they came away with a bucketload of trauma to add to the one that they already had. but we know that bruce was really trying with jason, and at the end of s2, dick was coming to acknowledge that bruce had offered him something that wasn’t just darkness. jason’s death and bruce’s reaction to that shattered that fragile progress.

d) “gotham got to me too.” i feel more sympathetic towards dick running off on his own than most, and it’s not just because i’m an unapologetic stan.  we’ve seen before that dick... devolves when overwhelmed, and he lashes out and makes ill thought out decisions and just Does Not Deal. it happened after hearing the news that deathstroke had returned in s2, and it didn’t help that everyone around him was reeling at the news, either. this time, however, he has his salvation in his family, and despite some stupid decisions like running off and kidnapping supervillains without telling his team, he’s been really on the ball this season. thinking clearly and logically, holding it together and working on a plan, thinking two steps ahead of the villains... yes.

e) gar needing to believe that jason isn’t beyond redemption... there’s a lot of blood on his hands, too, from when he was manipulated by cadmus last season. it makes sense why he’d relate to jason’s predicament, and i hope dick picked up on that.

f) my head just added a plaintive ow after dick jumped feet first into the storage room

i need, crave gifs of this scene!

11. *sits on hands* i’m going to talk more about red hood, i promise!

12. more gar and dick! is it my birthday??!!

(actually, according to the tamil calendar, it is my birthday! my “star” birthday)

12.5. excellent. dick using some implausible training that bruce taught him to solve a mystery? passing some of that knowledge onto gar? that proud smile when he sees gar perfectly execute moves that he taught him? MY HEART IS EXPLODING

13. aw, i love flashback!dick and barbara, they’re so cute <3

13.25. why does it not surprise me that the way he proposes a relationship to barbara is by saying “we make sense”? this guy can deduce exactly who was present where and what weapon they were holding from a garbled audio recording but other times he’s utterly clueless, and that’s a consistent character beat right from s1

13.5. so.... that’s why lady vic has it out for... barbara....? i don’t get it. it’s flimsy. but hey! the fun thing about titans is that i don’t have to get it. the payoff has nothing to do with the plot.

14. i can’t believe that barbara fell for that, but at least that wheelchair fight looked awesome, so.

15. oh yeah, i forgot that red hood bullied the mob into helping him and scarecrow... at least that explains the whitecoats and the elaborate set-up.

15.5. honestly i love how this dynamic between kory and kom is developing, though i wish more of the team would pay attention to it. time to call justin, i think!

16. i wonder what happened after that second flashback where barbara got hurt during that heist. did she give up on doing any more (maybe jim caught her)? was it because dick was called away by bruce and then the titans and got caught up in his own issues? maybe barbara froze him out because she wasn’t looking for the relationship that he was looking for? maybe the idea of doing that with someone turning into batman-lite was just... unappealing? scary?

whatever it is, it doesn’t look like dick ever processed the end of that relationship. it’s very intriguing to see where their dynamic goes next.

17. so.... what, did vic deliver some fear toxin to barbara? i... what?

17.5. and i TOLD YOU that they would never explain that doll or why vic attacked those two cops at the beginning! oh, titans. never change. 

18. did jason just randomly have tim’s restaurant burgled? god, i’m feeling a bit nauseous... are they going to kill tim’s father?

18.25. i feel like the rest of the season is going to wrestle with jason’s culpability in the horrible stuff he’s doing and i’m already seeing that prospect divide fans. on one hand, his story is taking a lot of oxygen away from other equally interesting story arcs, and he’s done some truly awful things, like indiscriminate murder, threatening to kill children, blowing up hank, and potentially killing tim’s parents. 

there’s something to be said for the kind of hold that crane has over him, and the so-called ‘anti-fear’ drug that he keeps plying jason with--he’s alone, drugged almost constantly (to the level of dependence), fresh from the trauma of being bludgeoned to death. he hasn’t conquered fear; he’s ruled by it. on the other hand, given that he’s the one character on the show given an obvious and identifiable ‘mental illness’ arc (maaaaybe dick too), one can argue that it’s irresponsible to show this progress into such violence: jason was vulnerable because he was struggling, and that left him vulnerable, but it took only a push before he became a fucking serial killer.

but that could mean we underestimate the degree of that vulnerability, and the mechanics of this universe where he fell into the clutches of the one supervillain perfectly designed to exploit that vulnerability. that helpless spiral into further and further self-destruction is all too real. it’s valuable to know that someone who has sunk that low can still seek help--actual help--and get it. 

18.5. i don’t know. it’s not a question i’m going to resolve at the end of an overlong recap at 1 in the morning. i don’t believe it’s even a question that titans can resolve. but i am interested in where they’re going next with jason.

19. this episode was genuinely great! i’m pumped for the rest of the season!

[be-the-spark-flyboy]

One Step Forward Two Steps Back

Call It What You Want (7/?)

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Med student!Poe x reader

A/N: Poe needs to calm down in this one smh that gif is so fitting

Chapter Summary: Poe tries to talk to you, but you make his life infinitely more difficult since you’re still under the impression that he was still with his girlfriend

Warnings: swearing, dash of angst, everyone being dumb asses

Word count: 2.4k

You don’t remember the walk back to your place, your mind too occupied with the thoughts of what had just happened with Poe fucking Dameron. You kissed him. More like, he kissed you first but you still went with it, way too eagerly, head empty of any rational thoughts. He has a girlfriend. How could you forget that, if even for a moment? How could he forget that? 

You used to be sure Poe wasn’t the type of person who would cheat on someone, but now, not so much. And the worst part? You enjoyed kissing him, so goddamn much. You should’ve pushed him away, should’ve stopped him before he kissed you. How could you be so reckless? 

Before you know it, you’re walking up to your front door, too busy mentally kicking yourself, to notice the cardboard boxes lying around the floor. Your foot catches on one and you almost go tumbling down, but an arm shoots out to steady you before you could fall. 

“Oh god, I’m so sorry!” A woman around your own age exclaims, her hand still firmly clamped on your arm as you wobble in surprise. She chuckles awkwardly, an easy smile settling on her face as she sticks a hand out to you. “I’m Rose Tico. I just moved in next door,” She tells you. Oh, your new neighbor. She seems nice, you think. You shake her hand, introducing yourself.

“You need any help moving in?” You offer, though you don’t really feel like putting yourself in a social situation. Thankfully, Rose declines. After a quick exchange of numbers, you rush into your home, hoping Jessika was already at home. You find her sitting cross-legged on the counter, happily munching on a muffin from your stress baking batch. 

“Poe kissed me,” The words are out of your mouth before you could even think about how you were going to reveal the news, and the bite of muffin Jessika takes almost goes flying out of her mouth.

“WHAT?” She screeches, scampering down from the counter, crossing the room in record time before shaking you by the shoulders. “Woman! What? Is my ship finally sailing?”

“What? No!” You break away from her grip, grimacing. “He has a girlfriend, Jessika!” She makes a gagging sound at your protestations.

“But she is a bitch and everyone hates her,” Jessika states like its the most obvious thing in the world. You still have absolutely no idea what made everyone hate her so much. If anyone knew about it, you’re pretty sure that it would be Jessika. But would asking her about it mean that you care? That you’re admitting your feelings?

“Yeah well, that not the point. Kissing someone else is basically cheating, isn’t it?” You swing back to the problem at hand. What happens in their relationship isn’t any of your business, you decide.

“Well, yeah.” She shrugs. “Maybe you should talk to him about this. He might have an explanation for things, ya know? Poe just doesn’t seem like the type to be so careless about someone’s feelings,”

“Huh, since when are you an expert on Poe?” You ask her. It surprised you how Jessika could be so intuitive and heartfelt at times, so at odds with her usual carefree nature.

“I am an expert on everyone, honey,” she says, dramatically flipping her hair over her shoulders.

“Yeah, whatever,” You push past her, still not very convinced. “Oh, did you meet our new neighbor?”

“Rose?” She asks, going back to her muffin. “Yeah, I don’t think she likes me very much.”

“Not an expert on Rose?” You laughed.

“Not yet,” she tells you.

---

“Just ask her, man!” Finn exclaims, sitting opposite Poe in a crowded coffee shop as his best friend nervously shuffles his phone from one hand to the other.

“Urgh, how do I even phrase it? Isn’t it weird if I just ask her out of the blue?” Poe asks.

“You’re thinking too much,” Finn crosses his arm, glaring at him. “Since when are you so afraid to talk to a girl?” 

Finn hates seeing Poe like this, a complete mess and totally out of his element. He had been that way since you left in the hurry the previous day. And in the past almost 24 hours Finn has been the one to put up with all his whining. As much as Finn pities Poe, he also wants to strangle him just to get some peace and quiet.

“Since I fucked up and kissed her and now she probably thinks I’m an asshole who cheats on his girlfriend!” Poe whines.

“Dameron you’re such a fucking drama queen. Just text her!” Poe reluctantly punches in a few words before flipping his phone around for Finn to see. 

“Is this okay? Too short? Too formal?”

“No its fine,” Finn reassures him. Finally, they were getting somewhere.

“What if I just- Hey! What the hell, Finn?” Poe shoots Finn a look of betrayal as the other man pressed send on the text before he could snatch back his phone.

“See! It’s done. Nothing to worry about,”

“Easy for you to say,” Poe mutters indignantly.

---

Your phone buzzes in your pocket in the quiet corner of the library. You were looking for reference books for your latest project from hell which was sucking your soul. You pull your phone out of your pocket, welcoming the distraction.

Poe: Hey, it’s Poe. Are you free around 1 later? Do you want to join me for lunch? :)

Or not. Oh shit. You know Jessika told you to just talk to Poe. Communication is the best way to sort things out, but it’s always easier said than done isn’t it?

Does he want to talk about the events of the previous day? Is he going to tell you that he likes you and that was why he kissed you? But what if he apologizes for it and tells you that it was a mistake instead? You can’t decide which one would be worse.

You don’t want to have lunch with him. Just the thought of seeing him again makes your chest constrict in panic. But you can’t just leave him hanging, you have to reply. And you find yourself thinking for the millionth time, if only I hadn’t gotten so close to him.

Your fingers were dancing above the keypad, contemplating what excuse to give as another notification pops up on the top of your screen. And then another.

Ben: Bro, I need your help.

Ben: Pleeeeaaaassseee I’ll buy you lunch

You spend years getting lunch all alone most of the time and suddenly two boys are fighting for your attention on the same goddamn day. Fun.

It really isn’t a difficult decision to make. Your friend needs your help, so you gotta put that above some casual lunch right? Yeah, totally, you decide. It isn’t because you want to avoid Poe, not at all. You just have somewhere else to be.

And so you take the cowards way out.

You: Okay, where do I meet you?

Ben: Wow that was fast did I speak too soon about lunch?

You: NOPE you’re still buying

—-

“She hasn’t replied. Why hasn't she replied Finn?!” Poe’s fidgeting puts Finn on edge as he watches him pick up the phone and check the notifications, place it down, then pick it up to check the notification, again and again. 

“Because you just texted her, Poe. Maybe she’s busy,” Finn takes a sip of his coffee, Poe’s cup already drained. Finn considers buying him another cup of coffee just to give him something else to do. But knowing his friend, he probably already had at least two this morning. He does not need more caffeine. 

His phone buzzes again and Poe sweeps it up. “It’s not her...” he groans, looking at the screen with barely veiled disappointment.

“Okay, gimme that,” Finn snatches the device from his hand as Poe throws himself back into his seat, pouting like a five-year-old with his toys taken away. “You need patience dude, a lot of it,” Finn shakes his head at him.

Usually, Poe had plenty of patience. But not when it came to you apparently. He doesn’t regret kissing you at all, but maybe he moved too fast? He definitely should have talked to you first, or maybe asked you out first instead of just kissing you. Or told you that he broke up with Sarah. Yep that one, that’s the first thing he should’ve done.

The phone pings again and Poe almost flings himself over the table trying to snatch it from his friend’s hand. “Christ Poe, calm down! God!” Poe pays no mind, but his face falls the second he unlocks his phone. 

“She said she can’t make it,” Poe deflates. “She’s meeting up with someone else for lunch. Finn, she’s avoiding me, right? She doesn’t want to talk to me anymore. How am I supposed to explain anything to her like this?” Poe goes on rambling for- Finn has lost count of the number of times he has heard it. 

“You got anything lessons later?” Poe shakes his head, already starting to sulk in his seat again.

“Let’s go to that diner off-campus you like so much,” Finn suggests. That’ll cheer him up.

---

“Jesus fucking Christ,” You curse, catching your cup before it tipped all the way spilling some of its contents on yourself in the process. A few heads turn your way in the diner but you pay no mind to it. 

“That’s the second time I’m watching you spill something on yourself,” Ben clucks handing you tissues yet again.

“Shut up, Solo,” You snap at him, but take the tissues from him anyways, trying to blot the dampness from your sweatshirt.

“No no, I was right. You do need a nanny following you around cleaning up after you,” he sounds so monotonous but you just know he’s laughing at you.

“Oh, look at me I’m Ben Solo, I’m a med student and I need help to write a fucking essay!” You mock him in retaliation.

“Okay smartass, what about you help me instead of destroying more tables,” you flip him off as he pulls his laptop out of his bag and moves both your cups out of your reach.

“You’re mean, you know that?” You admonish him and not a second after the last word leaves your mouth, a heavy fabric hits you in the face.

You almost roll it back up and fling it back at him before he says, “Put it on, you’re going to be cold,” He had a point. Your half drenched sweatshirt wasn’t going to dry anytime soon. And the huge blot of brown didn’t exactly look great on your light grey sweatshirt.

“Thanks. You’re that mean,” you pronounce before draping it over your shoulders. 

---

“Rey could help,” Finn suggests, rubbing his hands together in efforts to gain some warmth in the cold weather.

“She definitely will not help, I ate the last cookie,” Poe answers dejectedly scuffing the heel of his boot on the sidewalk, hands buried deep inside his pocket as he drags his feet beside Finn.

“I’ll ask her for you,” Finn offers. There was only so much whining a man can take, at least this way he will be helping Poe, and himself. Two birds, one stone.

Poe pushes open the door to the diner, the sounds and the smell immediately lifting his rotten mood. The diner is relatively small, but the checkered tiles and the smell of greasy burgers never fail to make him smile. 

The diner is crowded as usual, filled with the sound of loud conversations and cutlery clinking together. Poe hadn’t taken two steps in when his heart plunges straight into his stomach.

He sees you there, looking gorgeous as ever, laughing with your friend. A jacket, clearly not yours, around your shoulders as the two of you sat squeezed into the same side of the booth. You pay no mind to anything else, he’s too far for you to notice him there.

So that’s why you ran away after kissing him. Poe has this sinking feeling that he has been reading the situation all wrong. You never did like him. It was Ben all along. And last night the kiss must have been a heat of the moment thing, not because you actually liked him. That was why you have been avoiding him since. Because you feel guilty. 

It all makes sense now. He never should’ve kissed you.

Finn walks right into Poe, frozen in place. “The hell, man?” He slaps him on the shoulder. The actions seem to startle Poe out of his trance. He turns on his heel and storms off, not bothering to wait for Finn to catch up with him.

---

“She ditched me for Ben Solo,” Poe was positively fuming. “For Ben fucking Solo. Of all people Finn! Ben Solo,” he exclaims. Rey sits cross-legged on the sofa beside Finn, watching her friend slowly lose his mind. Clearly, the problem is Ben Solo related. Again. She has no idea what happened this time, but something tells her, now is not the best time to ask Poe about it. She could just ask Finn later.

“Calm down you’re gonna summon him or something,” Finn says looking for lunch to order, watching Poe pace. Clearly, lunch was the last thing on his mind, but Finn was hungry.

“Calm down? Ben Solo, Finn!” Poe exclaims.

“Jesus H. Christ,” Finn mutters under his breath.

“I need to take a walk. Come on Beebs,” The corgi happily jumps up from its perch on the sofa at the sound of the keys jiggling, following Poe hot on his heels.

“Oh my god, he’s gone crazy,” Finn mutters again, watching Poe walk out, almost slamming the door behind him.

“What was it this time?” Rey asks and Finn sighs heavily before explaining in great detail the events of the day.

“It could be a misunderstanding and maybe they are just friends. But given what happened last time, I don’t really blame Poe for assuming otherwise. Rey, you gotta talk to her. It already a big mess, we need to help,” He concludes, sprawled across the couch, his head resting on Rey’s lap as she thoughtfully munched on an apple.

“Okay, I’ll help him this time,” she nods slowly. “But I still don’t forgive him for eating the last cookie. It was supposed to be mine,” She huffs.

---

The Dameron taglist (open): @writefightandflightclub​ @arkofblake​ @yougottakeeponkeepinon​ @multifandomlife22​ @skymerons​ @smol-peter-parker​ @rae-rae-patcha​ @demigod-dragonrider-schoolidol​ @spider-starry​ @hkmultifandom​ @cloud-leader​ @elmoakepoke​ @staringmoony​ @valhallavalkyrie9​ @the-cry-of-youth​ @liadamerondjarin​ @m1rkw00dpr1ncess​ @takemepedropascal​ @xremember-me-notx​

[daydream-ideas]

The Shadows

I’m not sure if this an actual real life concept, as yet again, I have not done any research, but I saw it in a few manhwa’s and stole it for my paracosm hahaha. 

The Emperor’s Shadows. 

People who are tasked with following and protecting the emperor in secret, away from the eyes of anyone who might be watching, even the emperor’s own knights and average guards. They’re useful for protection when the emperor has to go somewhere discreetly and the addition of knights would give away too much, plus, they can be sent on errands to gather intel as spies. 

Lyr gathers up all the assassins who previously worked for the king of Misian (though the king said that he ‘owned’ them) who Lyr usurped the throne from and makes them into his Shadows, having them be spies rather than assassins as they previously were, since the skillset is rather similar (having to be stealthy, etc.) but I still just refer to them as assassins anyway.

—

warnings for: torture, conditioning, assassins (wow shocker), war mention, human experimentation, drugs, addiction, slavery, forced labor

Silas  – the first assassin

He was the best of the five, and the one sent to kill Lyr when he first claimed the throne of his home kingdom, Avimier. Lyr defeated him (which honestly was just kind of luck and Lyr’s paranoia since he’d just gone through a coup at the hands of his knights, so he was really on edge, but Silas is super good at fighting) and had him sent to the dungeons, where he pretty much forgot about him for the next couple of years lol. When he sentences Silas to be imprisoned, he tells his guards to “find out who sent him” which, given the history of Avimier’s past monarchs who were typically cruel, the guards interpreted the order as “torture the assassin until he reveals who sent him” which Lyr does not consider at all (he’s new to this and doesn’t yet know how things work) and that’s how Lyr accidentally had a man tortured 😬 

He later releases Silas when he discovers what’s been done to him in the dungeons, but this isn’t until after the war with the Sylnera’ti kingdom which occurs much later in the timeline (it’s the third kingdom he conquers) and the king who sent Silas (the Misian king) is already dead. 

The Misian king (he doesn’t deserve a name) tortured all his assassins so he could condition them to follow him as living weapons and nothing else, and as a result, Silas had shut off any part of himself that could feel emotion as a way to survive, long before he ever even met Lyr. Due to his past conditioning, him hearing Lyr’s name during the vicious torture he endured in the dungeons, it rewired his brain to be absolutely loyal to Lyr as his king, rather than as a target. 

This is something that brings great discomfort to Lyr when he finds out because it’s not like this is something he wanted to have happen, even if it does technically benefit him. It’s also not something I was planning on sharing here? because it is super fucked up and Lyr is still my precious bean even if he did something like this, but yeah, there’s that. 

Silas has long white / silver hair and grey eyes that hold no emotion. He’s the most anti-social para of the whole cosm and prefers to skulk in the library rather than interact with anyone. People also don’t like being around him as even his presence unnerves them — they don’t even know he’s an assassin, it’s just that monotone, expressionless way about him that creeps them out. He likes to nap in odd places that aren’t meant for sleeping. 

—

Casimir – the second assassin

Given a less dramatic backstory than Silas, as the remaining assassins all dispersed from the Misian castle after Lyr usurped the throne, going their separate ways to try and hide out while making a life for themselves — not that it was really much of a life. 

Casimir had it the best out of all the assassins being that he was remarkably average. He was still tortured by the Misian king just as the rest of them were, but didn’t garner any unwanted attention for being the best or worst. 

After leaving the castle, he joined a band of mercenaries and used his skills to complete jobs and earn a little bit of money, and for once feeling a semblance of freedom, though he was still bound by the anger and bitterness of his past. 

He was the easiest to find when Lyr went looking, as he wasn’t really being inconspicuous, though he was not happy to see another royal. Lyr, being a supreme idiot who wanted to gain Casimir’s trust so that the assassin would come back to the castle with him, allowed Casimir to take out his anger on him without fighting back (well, it’s the trust thing and also a bit of Lyr’s guilt complex but we’re not gonna get into that) and so this just, did not go very well with Alex, Lyr’s personal guard. The two still don’t get along. 

Casimir did end up joining Lyr, but is also now filled with guilt about how he treated Lyr because Lyr is nice to him unlike the Misian king, though Casimir would never admit to any of this and just takes to deliberately annoying Lyr to cover up how much he wants to apologize for what happened. (me: smh, why are you like this.) 

He develops a taste for the finer things in life after going back to the castle with Lyr, as Lyr starts giving him a stipend for his work (which the Misian king never did) as well as actually decent meals (which he also never got) and so Casimir is overwhelmed with guilt, kindness, and nice fancy things he has no idea what to do with. 

—

Ghislaine – the third assassin

contrary to Casimir, this one had it the worst out of all the assassins. He was the worst at being an assassin, and the most rebellious during the ‘conditioning’ stage, and generally disliked by the Misian king the most, which lead to a whole variety of unpleasantness. 

He was tortured even more than all the other assassins, which left him with hundreds of tiny, meticulously cut scars all across his hands, arms, face, and chest. The Misian king also decided to try and ‘enhance’ Ghislaine’s abilities by experimenting on him to try and make him a SUPER ASSASSIN which notably, didn’t work out so well. 

Because of the experiments, Ghislaine now survives on this custom-made drug which damages him and keeps him alive in equal measure — he needs to take it or else he’ll die, but it’s also getting him addicted and giving him terrible side-effects that cause him great pain. He takes as much of the serum as he can when he escapes the castle when Lyr usurps the throne, but he still runs out of it some months later and has to break into the castle to try and get more. This is when he meets Lyr, as he’s captured while trying to steal the serum. It’s early winter, just before the big snows but at the point when things are starting to frost, and Lyr can see how withered Ghislaine has become. 

He’s been living on the streets as no one will take him in—whether at an inn or for a job, because no one wants to look at him because of his scars. They’re very apparent and impossible to hide, so they make it hard for him to go anywhere without being chased off, so he ends up on the streets. 

Lyr makes him a deal that he’ll let Ghislaine have the serum and will have his potions man try and engineer something that doesn’t cause as much damage to his body, if Ghislaine will stay and serve him. Ghislaine doesn’t want to serve another royal after what happened to him at the hands of the last one, but he also knows he can’t stay out on the streets during winter, and needs that serum to survive. 

He’s also my favorite of the five ❤

—

Devere – fourth assassin

This one I know the least about since I haven’t really daydreamed with him too much, but he’s a good boi. He leaves the castle and goes to the coast to work on a ship, even though he’s really not suited for it or good at it. He’s constantly harassed, teased, mocked, bullied, and beaten by the other sailors and shipworkers, but he prefers that to everything he went through in the castle. His soul is slowly dying like this, but he pushes away the feeling because he knows it could be so much worse. 

He’s the most reticent of all the assassins when Lyr comes to try and retrieve him, so it takes a lot of negotiation in order to get him to go back to the castle. He doesn’t try to harm Lyr like Casimir did, taking out his anger and bitterness on a figurehead, rather, he just shuts down and tries to ignore them like he’s trying to ignore his own trauma.

—

Zev – fifth assassin

He’s the last acquired assassin due to being the hardest to get to. He’s not even in the empire, but in the kingdom of Inscitus, which is ruled by a king who’s not actively at war with Lyr, but the two still don’t have a good relationship because of reasons.

Zev was sent away to the salt mines of Inscitus by the Misian king, before Lyr usurped the throne, where he was imprisoned and forced to mine as basically a slave for several years. He’s gaunt and thin and sickly when Lyr finds him, and since Emperor!Lyr can’t just go and ask another kingdom for a prisoner without raising suspicions or endangering relations, it’s time for Servant!Lyr to do a prison break with a very willful assassin.

Lyr, Alex, and Silas rescue Zev from the mines and escape the kingdom, having to travel back to the castle on a small wagon through the forest with an angry, sick man who didn’t even make it to death’s doorstep, he passed out on death’s front lawn.

Probs my second favorite of the five right now

 —

[1-800-seo]

1-800-𝗦𝗘𝖮'𝘀 𖣘 "𝗬𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗺𝘆 (𝗨𝗻𝗶)𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗲"

- 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: 𝖩𝗎𝗇𝗀𝗄𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝗑 𝖸/𝖭

- 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿/𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝖼𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗄/𝖻𝗎𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗍𝖾𝖽/𝖾2𝗅/𝖼𝗈𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗀𝖾 𝖠𝖴

- 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀 (𝖺 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗄𝗂𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗌), 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝖺𝗍𝖾𝗌 𝗅𝖺𝗎𝗇𝖽𝗋𝗒, 𝖽𝗈𝗆!𝗃𝗄 𝗂𝖿 𝗎 𝗌𝗊𝗎𝗂𝗇𝗍, 𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗆𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌

- 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀: 2984

- 𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: 𝖶𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗅𝖺𝗎𝗇𝖽𝗋𝗒 𝗀𝖾𝗍𝗌 𝗆𝗂𝗑𝖾𝖽 𝗎𝗉 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖺 𝖼𝖾𝗋𝗍𝖺𝗂𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗈𝗇𝖾'𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗈𝖿 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗍𝖾'𝗌 𝗀𝗈 𝗉𝗂𝗇𝗄, 𝖺 𝗀𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇𝗀𝖾 𝗉𝗅𝗈𝗍 𝖾𝗇𝗌𝗎𝖾𝗌, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿 𝖾𝗇𝖺𝗆𝗈𝗎𝗋𝖾𝖽 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗈𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖽𝗈𝗋𝗄.

doing laundry is absolutely one of your least favourite things in the world beside soggy socks

so you’re in a bad mood as soon as you walk into the campus launderette to say the least

the launderette is empty bar one dude you’d seen around the global technics centre

if you remember rightly he’s a European studies major

odd choice but you do you and all that

now you’re not weird or anything but you have a preference on what type of washing machine you use

I know I know kind of unorthodox

but the old washing machines take 30 mins longer so you’d prefer a newer one

unfortunately the only one left is directly next to this familiar-faced stranger and his laundry

your better judgement is telling you no but your impatience is telling you yes

and so you dump your laundry onto the floor next to the stranger and his and start sorting through for all your whites

your piles mingle a tad as they overlap beside each other like Venn diagrams of assorted underwear and other garments

his consisting of only whites

yours a jumbled mess since you had to wash all of your stuff

in sync you both pick up your washing and put it into the machine

you catch his dark wide eyes as you both straighten up and he lets out an awkward low-voiced giggle

your cheeks immediately flush pink and a bashful smile creeps up to your lips

“you’re from the global centre, right?”

you ask testing the waters

“I am, I’m a European studies major, my name’s Jungkook. I recognise you, you’re in linguistics class right?”

“Yeah, I’m a linguistics major so you’ll mostly see me there, it’s nice to meet you Jungkook”

you say with a smile as your hands fidget with the door handle of the washing machine

“It’s nice to meet you too, I thought I recognised you from somewhere, but it’s because I see you sometimes when I have to do extra credit European language projects. What’s your name?”

he says tilting his head like a curious puppy

“its ______”

you say as you bow to him politely

“Can I ask you something? I have to do a project on European languages and their similarities to others. The professor wants us to speak to outsiders for references so would I be able to collab on a project with you sometime in the future, if it’s not too much to ask?”

he averts his eyes from yours and blushes lightly

“Oh yeah sure, that’s no issue! It’ll be beneficial to me too because the linguistics portion of the course is coming up soon, so it’s a great idea.”

you beam at him

“Could I get your number?”

their is a pause that feels like an eternity between your next words and his last

the cause of this is your mind being far too focused on his wavy dark hair and his clear doe eyes

you snap out of your daze

“yeah totally, one sec”

you pull out your phone from your backpack on top of the washing machine and input his contact name and number as he reads it out

“Thanks for that, it’ll be a big help, let me know when you want to link up” he replies

and with that you had his number and continued on with your washing

21/10 18:32

Jungkook ༄ : not to be accusatory but do you happen to own a pair of RED socks?

You: yes, why do you ask??

Jungkook ༄ : well ALL of my washing seems to be PINK!!

You: just because I own a pair of red socks doesn’t mean it was me 😠

Jungkook ༄ : yes but you were the only one in the launderette when I was there,,

Jungkook ༄ : smh gonna be turning up to class in pink tshirts and and socks, everyone be thinking ive made a new fashion choices when it’s really just because SOMEONE can’t keep their clothes separate from others B/

You: 1) it’s not my fault that my socks decided to migrate to new lands

You: 2) why, are you scared of pink or something? your ego too fragile to wear a ‘woman’s colour’?

You: 3) did you really use a sunglasses sad face emoticon lol

Jungkook ༄ : girl u owe me big time for all these clothes you ruined 😩

Jungkook ༄ : also im not scared of pink I just dont want to be wearing pink shirts to all of my formal events for the next ten years

Jungkook ༄ : and yes im sWaG so my emoticons are sWaG duh

You : ruined? ruINED? RUINED? I did not ruin anything, I simply spiced up your wardrobe boo x

You : oh no he’s a 2012 hype beast 🤦🏻‍♀️

Jungkook ༄ : how dare you call me something so sacreligious as a hypebeast!!

Jungkook ༄ : I am gucci not channel thank you very much

Jungkook ༄ : anyways I gtg write a report, speak soon red socks

Seen ✓

Jungkook was in fact not writing a report

he was planning revenge dun dun dun~~~

his plan was to do the exact same thing you had done to him

but he had to be cunning about it

and so the week went on

he was scrolling through twt when he received a new follower

it was the one and only @_______

and lo and behold their last tweet was “tysm Seokjin oppa for buying me a personal washing machine,, now I can do my most hated thing but at home!!”

hehehe

an idea sprung into kookie’s head

he didn’t have to try and spike your washing at the launderette

he could do it in a place you’d never suspect,, your home

now he only had to find out where you lived

just stalkerish tingz

he had to be lowkey about this

so he decided to ask his best mate and social butterfly of a friend Taehyung whether he knew you

and of course he did lol

“Hell yeah I know where she lives, she had the best party of the whole term, Jimin was so drunk he started chatting himself up in the mirror”

“Damn that sounds like a good time, probs should start going to these parties you invite me to”

“defo should, anyways I’ll tell u as long as you promise not to spread the information or use it for pervy or questionable reasons”

“I promise not to spread it or use it for pervy or questionable reasons”

he replies in monotone voice and his hand on his chest like an oath

and so that was how he acquired your address

simple enough really

and so that’s the events that lead him to be crawling through your dorm window however paused like a deer in headlights at the questionable sounds coming from the room across

he was squatted on the window ledge like spider man, red sock in hand and hood up

it was 9:00pm and your university apartment was supposed to be empty at this time

you had your class on now but he hadn’t accounted for your roommate

hence why he had frozen at the unsavoury sounds echoing round the apartment

low moans and grunts emanated from the room across

dEsGöStEn

he had to get to the kitchen without alerting the dusk time love makers

he could do it if the floor plan was the same as his apartment block and he bet his reputation on that

if he got caught he’d never hear the end of it from his mates and your roommate might even call the campus police if they were spooked enough

and so he clambered through your bedroom window and onto your bed underneath

unmade bed might he add but what did he expect from a uni student

with wide eyes he listened for any noise of suspecting roommates and examined your room

the desk was littered with papers and an oversized lava lamp stood stout in the corner of the room

a lacy bra was hung over your wardrobe handle

he shoved away the idea of you wearing it and continued with his night time plot

slowly and stealthily he crept through the halls of the apartment and out to the kitchen

on the maiden was already a neatly hung load of whites

he’d have to assume it was yours otherwise he’d have to go back to your room to get laundry

he bundled up the clothes and shoved them in the washing machine with the incriminating red sock he’d brought and set it to economy spin

round and round it spun, getting progressively louder as it went

he had to get out of there asap

tip-toeing as he went past the questionable lewd noises, he finally made it to your bedroom

he made one last check to see if he’d left any damage in your room

his eyes fell upon that same bra

damn his manhood making him think predictably

he shoved the thought away and departed

25/10 22:08

You: what in the hell did you do to my washing!!!?!!!

You: unless it was a ghost it HAD TO BE YOU JEON 🤬

Jungkook ༄ : wym I don’t even know where you live 😑

Jungkook ༄ : what’ve you done now?

You: IT HAS TO BE YOU!! SOMEONE FRIGGIN TURNED MY WASHING PINK AND I PROMISE YOU IT WASNT ME

Jungkook ༄ : how would i do that?? I don’t have like magic clothes dyeing skills boo

You: I SWEAR it was you!!

You: what do you want to bet it was u

Jungkook ༄ : I won’t bet anything I’m poor

You: that means you did it!

Jungkook ༄ : if you come with me to Taehyung’s party tomorrow I’ll tell u everything

Jungkook ༄ : but only if you go, that’s the terms of agreement

You: that’s all the incriminating evidence I need!! you basically just admitted to it you know?

You: however for reasons sake I will attend 👀

Jungkook ༄ : see you then red socks x

You: I suppose u will x

time passed quickly and soon it was Taehyung’s party

You’d known Taehyung since middle school however since starting college you hadn’t seen much of him

schedules clashed often so the only time you got to see him was at a good party

nothing wrong with that, you just probably haven’t had a completely sober conversation with him in 2 years

he’s good fun, Taehyung, so you hoped Jungkook wasn’t as much as a killjoy as he’d been this week

his little antics (that you’d yet to figure out) had caused your work uniform to turn bright pink

and thus the ‘pink princess’ nickname at work began

you felt like sharpay, everyone in white, but you pink

you’d quite like to knock Jungkook down a peg after that

and so you made your way to the infamous Taehyung’s party

he welcomed you as you entered the large door of his fraternity house

behind his head of black curls you could see the mess that is a raging college party

young people, at assumably different levels of intoxication, were everywhere

some were stood all the way up the expanse of the stairs even

you looked around and spotted a familiar brunette in the kitchen sat on the large marble counter tops

he’s chatting to some pink haired girl beside him

you stalk up to him like a woman on a mission and jokingly (a little too hard for jokingly) push his shoulders with both hands

he immediately snaps his head round to face you and his eyes widen with shock

“I have a bone to pick with you.” you say as stern as you can

you grab hold a fistful of his black T-shirt and drag him into a side room

once you enter only then do you realise it’s a laundry room

how fitting 👀

you say “Come on, tell me how you did it.” as you cross your arms and glare at him

“Did what?”

“you know what I mean, don’t play dumb with me, how did you turn all of my washing pink, and might I add, my work uniform too!”

“Ohhh that, it was far too easy. You really should keep your windows locked when you’re out.” he says as he laughs, like the whole thing is amusing

“So you’re telling me you broke into my apartment?! How did u know where I live??”

at this point you’re pacing around the room, arms flailing wide at the sudden discovery

“Well, I may or may not have asked Taehyung, and he told me, and then I entered, I did not break into your apartment. Anyway, I didn’t touch anything but the washing machine and I had the lovely experience of being serenaded by your roommate’s sex symphony.”

he made a step forward towards you, almost in a challenging way

“Oh I’ll be having harsh words with him later...” you say as you uncross your arms and put them on your hips.

you stand thinking for a second before it sinks in

“Wait.. what did you hear? You said sex symphony, right?”

“Uh yeah, your roommate was proper going at it with someone. At least he had the decency to do it whilst you were out, I guess.” He chuckled

“Oh my days, that means Hobi must’ve had Hyerim round! Go him I guess, but also ewww”

“Anyways we’ve bounced around the issue enough here, you ruined my clothes and broke into my apartment!” you exclaim backing up against the wall

Jungkook starts to close the gap between you two

“So? What’re you going to do about?”

your back pressed flush with the wall, you start to realise how close he really is

you can see the small freckles that dot the bridge of his nose, the thick eyelashes that frame his eyelids, the totally sinful look in his eyes

like this you start to realise how shockingly handsome he is

no wonder he has a slight reputation in class

you had no idea why he was looking at you this way

“I-I’ll call campus security..” You begin

“Will you really now?” he retorts as he slams his hand into the wall behind you, caging you in

“I w-will” a whisper that falls on deaf ears

before you even register, his lips have attached themselves to yours and you feel his thumb under your jaw

he works his lips against yours and you feel your legs start to tremble

he tastes sweet and robust, like syrup on your tastebuds

you mould into his kiss and then break away, panting for air, wanting more

everything felt so wrong, yet so right at the same time

it was as if your current issue had melted away and the only thing you could focus on was the way he looked at you and how his soft lips felt against yours

“J-Jungkook? What’re we doing?” you asked, a giggle leaving you

you rest your head against chest, clasping at his tshirt

“I couldn’t resist, you’re so hot when you’re angry”

he places a firm kiss against your cheek, takes your hand in his, and leads you back to the party

you couldn’t believe you’d just done that, let him kiss you so easily

but once you let him, it felt so right, like it was supposed to be that way, him lapping you up like a parched man to water

it felt so natural to have his arm round your waist like it was now

the pair of you approached Taehyung, still clutched together

“What happened to you two? I heard _____ went off on one and then you both were missing for ages. And now you both show up all over each other... what went down 👀”

“Well you know, hate and love are both forms of passion.” Jungkook says with a smirk

“excuse me? Assuming I love you? I let you kiss me once and you say it’s love? I’ll show you love” you retort

“Oooh she’s feisty; so you kissed? Damn, things’re moving quickly for you two, one minute Jungkook’s asking me for your address, the next you’re sucking each other’s faces off. I’m one of hell of a wing man, if I do say so myself.”

Taehyung flips an imaginary lock of hair out of his way like a sassy high school cheerleader

You both just laugh, at Taehyung, and because of how crazy it is,

It’s almost like you didn’t know you liked him like that until it smacked you in the face

“Do you want a drink? A beer?” Jungkook asks pouring himself a glass of punch

“That’d be great, thank you” you reply as you realise how much more time you want to spend with this annoying but totally handsome dork of a boy

༄ 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝗈 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀! ༄

This was just a little fic I wrote a while ago which had formatting errors so I fixed it for y’alI, Hope you enjoyed it ☺️ Let me know what you thought of it and feel free to like and reblog <3

[ichirakukpop]

Trick or Treat

Genre: angst/fluff

Characters: You x Hoseok

Word Count: 1.8K

Plot: You really want to go trick or treating with your boyfriend, but an exam you forgot to study for (and an intruder), tells you otherwise.

TW: breaking in, a possible murderer, that’s it i think lol

“Come on Hoseok, it’ll be fun!” You pleaded, grabbing onto your boyfriend’s arm. “Are you kidding? We’re so old, it’ll be so embarrassing!” Hoseok replied. You were trying to get Hoseok to go trick or treating with you. You knew you were way too old for it, but it was free candy, how could you pass on the once a year opportunity? “Besides, Namjoon is hosting a Halloween party tonight, remember?” He stated. “Oh yeah,” you said in a dull voice as you let go of his arm to let him enter the kitchen on his own. “We don’t have to dress up do we?" Hoseok laughed as he stuffed his mouth with some potato chips before turning back to you. "So you wanna go trick or treating… but you don’t wanna dress up?" "Ugh,” you rolled your eyes. “I just want some chocolate. And some candy. And maybe even some chips–” Your list was interrupted when Hoseok stuffed some chips into your mouth. “There you go. Chips!” Hoseok smiled. You narrowed your eyelids as you started to chew, causing him to chuckle. Ding It was your phone. You took it out of your pocket and read the notification. Suddenly you froze and your eyes opened wide. Hoseok knew something was wrong by the look on your face– and when you stopped mid-chew. “(Y/N), what is it?” He asked, sounding concerned. “Is everything alright?" "I… I have an exam tomorrow,” you said without any emotion as you starred off into space. Hoseok starred at you looking more confused than ever. You held your phone to his face so he can read what was on your phone. “Psychology midterm tomorrow! Make sure to study!” Hoseok read out loud. He took a minute to re-read the sentence, trying to understand it. “Okay…” he said, backing away from the phone. “What’s the problem? Are you not ready or something? I saw you studying–” You quickly snapped out of your shocked state and frowned. “Ugh no, Hoseok! I thought it was next Wednesday, not this Wednesday– AKA tomorrow!”

Hoseok still looked a little confused and you just dropped to the ground with your hands running through your hair.

“I’m not ready.  I only have chapter one memorized… I can’t read half of the textbook in one night–”

“Uh, okay calm down (Y/N),” Hoseok said as he helped you up and lead your distraught self to the bedroom. “Just go start studying now, you have to at least try." "I can’t fail Hoseok! My GPA is already so bad. I need to ace this exam!” You whined as Hoseok sat you down in your computer chair. “Okay then you’re just gonna have to pull an all-nighter,” Hoseok helped you get out your notes from your bag as he tried to encourage you. “I’ll help you write out your notes and–” “No, thank you though. I won’t be able to focus with you here. Just go to the party–” you said.

“What?– but it won’t be fun if you’re not there, YN.” He whined.   You looked up at Hoseok with an unamused face. “Yeah, I’ll just go help Namjoon set up early,” Hoseok said, backing up before leaving the room to go grab his things. Before leaving, he came by the room once more. “Alright, I’ll see you later love. When I get back I’ll quiz you. Hoseok kissed the top of your head, "Good luck. Make sure to take a few breaks and don’t forget to eat!” A couple of hours later, you were still in your room studying. You only studied about a third of what you were supposed to. You were tired, stressed out, and definitely sad about missing out on Halloween. But it didn’t matter, nonetheless, you had to ace your midterm and you were determined to do so.

It was now 11 pm and you were completely drained. You weren’t finished studying, but you needed a short break. You headed to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of coffee. You waited for the coffee to brew and watched the steam as it floated up. You were so focused, almost in a trance as you watched the steam, that you didn’t notice the strange sounds coming from the front door. It sounded like someone was trying to open the door. Since it was only 11 pm, you knew it couldn’t be Hoseok. It was still pretty early for him to be home from a party. It couldn’t be trick or treaters either because your apartment didn’t allow trick or treating in the first place.

You were about to go look through your peephole. to see who it was but then you saw the doorknob turning completely. Whoever it was, they were trying to get in.

You ducked behind your counter. You weren’t all that worried because Hoseok was the only other person to have the key to the apartment. Whoever it was couldn’t get in. However, when you heard the door creak open, that’s when you knew you were in trouble. You quickly covered your mouth with shock and so the intruder wouldn’t hear your panicked breathing. You ducked further underneath the counter and made yourself into a ball to be small.

You heard a few footsteps walking around the living room and then to your bedroom. Tears suddenly fell down your face and you felt your heartbeat getting faster and faster. Suddenly, the footsteps stopped for a moment and you held your breath. You hoped that the intruder gave up, that maybe he thought that there was nothing to rob and he’ll just leave. But you were wrong.

You heard the footsteps getting closer and closer. The intruder sounded like they were looking for something specific–no, someone. You began to cry more but you had to keep quiet. You covered your mouth and tried your best not to make a sound. In your mind, you begged for Hoseok to come home. You also cursed yourself for choosing such a stupid place to hide. Why didn’t you lock yourself in the closet or something? smh fool lol jk The footsteps only got closer and eventually, it felt like the person was right behind you. You covered your eyes but kept a little space open between your fingers.

Out of nowhere, the intruder peaked from behind the counter to tapped your shoulder and you screamed. “LEAVE ME ALONE!” You shouted as loud as you could before quickly getting up to grab a wooden spoon from the counter. You held the spoon up to defend yourself and you cried as the person stepped toward you.

The figure was slender and tall. He wore all black and had on one of the same masks as those worn in the purge movies. You always thought those movies were stupid, but now you were living it. You were about to die. “Stop, please,” you cried. You didn’t know what to do so you just stood there and cried. The man didn’t move.

Suddenly, you heard a very muffled laugh. At first, you didn’t know where it was coming from, but then you quickly realised that it was from him. The laugh was loud and sounded very “hahaha” like. That’s when you accepted your fate. Out of nowhere, the figure fell to the floor, still laughing, while grabbing his tummy. His laugh stopped sounding so scary.

You wiped your tears and stared at him in confusion, still holding the wooden spoon in front of you.

“What the hell,” you asked with a sniffle, more confused than ever. You remained back and didn’t even think of going near the man. Although his laugh wasn’t evil sounding anymore, his new state scared you even more. Soon the man stopped laughing and sat up. He turned to you, possibly staring at you– you couldn’t tell because of the mask. He chuckled once more then grabbed the back of his mask to remove it. Hoseok’s face was revealed and he started laughing once again. You stared at him first with shock, and then with anger. You should have known it was your stupid boyfriend when you heard his loud ass laughter. “I hate you,” you said in a very monotone voice. You didn’t know what to think. “I hate you SO MUCH” you cried. You jumped towards Hoseok and started hitting him. Hoseok laughed and tried to protect himself from you, even though you weren’t punching hard. “I’m sorry,” he said in between his laughs, “I couldn’t help it!” Hoseok kept apologizing, and when you got tired of hitting him, you stopped. “Why would you do that? I actually thought someone was breaking in and I was going to die,” You shouted in his face in between some sniffles. “You’re so mean, I hate you SO much." Hoseok chuckled and pulled you into a tight hug. He kissed your cheeks as he apologized a few times more. "I’m sorry (Y/N), I didn’t mean to make you cry. I know you hate me, but do you think these will help you forgive me?” Hoseok lifted up a big bag from behind the counter and placed it in your lap. You looked at him, confused, before opening it. It was a bag full of candy. A whole big bag full of chocolate, candy, chips, even some granola bars and more. “What is this? How did you–" "I went trick or treating. It was pretty embarrassing. I got so many funny looks from parents and the kids would always hide their bags whenever I came near them. I don’t think the sound of ‘aren’t you too old to be trick or treating’ will ever leave my head.” Hoseok said in a very serious manner.

You laughed at his story as you imagined it. “But the party…" "I helped Namjoon set up a bit, but I left before the party started. I knew it wouldn’t be fun without you and I thought these would maybe help you feel better, since you know– you forgot about your midterm.”   You chuckled with disbelief as you thought about how kind Hoseok was– aside from his stupid prank. You put the candy to the side and threw yourself on him to give him a kiss. “Thank you Hoseok, I love you so much!” You said as you hugged him tightly as he slouched back rolling his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can’t have any of the candy until after your midterm though, so save the 'I love you’s’ for after you get your A.”

You laughed and hugged Hoseok one more time. You knew it would be hard to get an A, but you had to at least try. Not for the candy, but because if Hoseok, a grown ass man, could go out trick or treating for you, then you could get him an A.  

thanks for reading!! :) i wrote this last year around CHRISTMAS smh but our requests are open so send in any requests!  & we’ll be posting our old requests soon, sorry for taking so long to do them! :(

back like we never left😏

[alocalband]

“He’s grumpy because he cares,” Chowder says solemnly.

Nursey abruptly stops staring at the wrinkle between Dex’s furrowed eyebrows—even halfway across a crowded room it’s still distracting--in order to turn and look at C instead. “He’s grumpy because he’s an asshole.”

“Well, that’s convenient. You know, since you’re kind of an asshole, too.”

Nursey sputters, and then clutches one hand in a desperate fist over his heart, playing it up. “Chow. Bro. You wound.”

Chowder rolls his eyes, and then starts not-so-subtly scouting the crowd for Cait so that he has an excuse to get out of Nursey Patrol. Not that Nursey needs the babysitting tonight. He’s only had one beer and doesn’t feel much like going for another.

“I love you both,” Chowder tells him, distracted, “but I will also murder you both if you guys don’t get your shit together already.”

“Hey, we haven’t fought in, like, weeks, alright? I have my shit perfectly together, thank you. I am now the resident SMH expert in dealing with all things Poindexter.”

“Are you also now the expert in pining? Because you know some of the guys have got a pool going.”

Nursey freezes. He, in fact, did not know that.

He tries not to go too visibly tense, but it’s a lost cause. Even if he were able to hide it completely, Chowder knows him too well not to read right through his pseudo-chill mask and see the silent freakout he’s suddenly having.

“Oh hey, sorry, fuck. I’ll tell them to stop, alright? I thought you knew.” Chowder puts a comforting hand on Nursey’s shoulder.

Nursey shakes his head in an absent no, trying to readjust his worldview to something that includes his teammates knowing he’s secretly head over heels for his roommate and defense partner. He thought he’d been so careful... “Um. Everyone knows?”

Chowder looks so apologetic it borders on outright sadness. “I’m sorry, Nursey, I really thought you were in on the whole thing. They wouldn’t have started anything if they didn’t think you were cool with it.”

He clears his throat and breathes in deep through his nose, bracing himself. “Does Dex...”

“No! No way,” Chowder is quick to reassure. “He is completely oblivious, I swear.”

Nursey sighs a little, at least marginally relieved and nods, more to himself than to Chowder. “Okay. Okay, chill.”

“I mean, oblivious about your feelings, anyway. He knows about the bet.”

“What?”

“We thought you both did! We thought you thought it was funny! Dex just thinks it’s all a joke, Nursey, seriously. Like, ‘oh, ha ha, all me and Nursey do is fight, must be from all that sexual tension.’ He thinks it’s just the guys giving you two a hard time.”

And Nursey doesn’t think Chowder is lying to him, exactly, but Nursey is the current ‘resident SMH expert’ on all things Dex for a reason, and he knows Dex figures out puzzles faster than any ten people combined. There is a very good chance that Dex has figured this out as well. Figured out that it’s not really just the guys teasing them, and that Nursey has been reluctantly falling in love with the guy for over a year now.

Shit.

The not knowing is going to give him an ulcer quicker than the stress of just ripping off the band aid will. So Nursey steels himself and lets his gaze find Dex again.

“Listen, it’s-- It’s fine. Sort of. Go find Farmer already, I think she’s by the backyard keg.” Chowder doesn’t look convinced, but Nursey starts walking away before he can do anything. Walking with purpose through the throng of bodies, straight toward the only person at this party that he hasn’t been able to convince himself to lose sight of.

It’s not like Nursey wants to have a crush. And he especially doesn’t want to have one on his grumpy asshole roommate. Derek Nurse is not, in fact, that much of a masochist. But his heart has, for the last several months now, had other ideas, and it’s been a losing battle ever since they moved into the Haus together.

“Well you’re refreshingly sober,” Dex greets him, but the small smirk on his face is amused. Playful, even. It’s a little devastating.

Nursey valiantly swallows back all of the emotions that that smirk threatens to call up to the surface, just like he’s done all school year. “And you’re depressingly sober. Not feeling it tonight?”

Dex shrugs. “I don’t think I’ve ever really ‘felt it.’ Parties aren’t my thing.”

“Oh come on, you manage alright.”

Dex chokes on an abrupt laugh. “High praise from the guy that needs an assigned babysitter when at a kegster.”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Poindexter, but it’s been awhile since I’ve actually needed that.”

The expression on Dex’s face softens minutely. It’s so subtle that Nursey isn’t quite sure if he’s imagined it or not, but he knows he’s not imagining the softness in Dex’s tone when he replies. “Yeah. I’ve noticed.”

Nursey clears his throat and shuffles his feet. He is the least chill he has ever been while at Samwell right now, and he can’t seem to make his body get back in line. “Hey, do you think we could...” he trails off awkwardly and motions towards the staircase with a raise of his chin.

Dex nods easily and follows him upstairs. And then, before Nursey knows it, they’re standing in the middle of their bedroom, facing each other, something charged between them that Nursey’s half convinced is all in his head and just the product of his own frayed nerves.

“So. Uh. You know,” he says, wanting to get this over with quickly. Maybe, if he’s lucky, he won’t have to move out of the Haus due to embarrassment. But if he does, he’d like to know now rather than when all his feelings blow up in his face.

“I know?”

“About...” Nursey gestures vaguely at himself, and then at Dex. “The pool.”

Dex flushes. “I don’t... not know about it.” Then he stops, blinks, and tilts his head like he’s figuring something out. “Wait. Did you not know?”

Nursey shakes his head and swallows.

“Oh.” Dex frowns. “Are you, like, pissed off about it? I don’t understand what your face is doing right now.”

“Why would I be mad?” Nursey tries for casual, and probably misses by a mile or three. “It’s just a joke, right?”

Dex grimaces a little. “Right.”

Oh fuck.

“So you know they’re serious,” Nursey says, monotone and numb. He feels hollowed out, empty, a self defense mechanism against the heartbreak he can see coming.

“They’re... half serious.” Dex shrugs. “They don’t mean any harm. They figure we both are just taking our time.”

“Taking our time.”

“Yeah. I really thought you knew.”

“I--” Nursey stops short, and narrows his eyes at the relaxed set of Dex’s shoulders, the genuinely calm and soft expression on his face, and he wonders if they might be having two very different conversations right now. “You’re a lot more easy going about all of this than I thought you’d be. What gives?”

“Oh, well, uh. Yeah.” Dex offers a wry smile. “The thing is that if you kiss me before the end of the school year, I win a couple hundred bucks. So.”

Nursey blinks owlishly. Dex’s cheeks are bright red, as are his ears, but he continues to hold Nursey’s gaze with steady conviction.

“You were that certain that I would?” Nursey asks, his voice turned into a rough whisper without his permission.

“I was hoping, anyway.”

“You were?”

“Well, I kinda thought we were on the same page about it all. But I guess not.”

“You thought I knew about the bet. You thought I knew...”

“That we were taking our time. Yeah.”

“Oh.” Nursey swallows thickly. “Wow.”

“So now that we’re actually on the same page...” Dex trails off uncertainly, his eyes wide and just a touch too nervous now to really be called hopeful. And, well, screw that. It may have taken Nursey a stupidly long time to catch up to where apparently everyone else already was, but he didn’t get here just to screw it up now.

Nursey takes a step forward and reaches a hand out to Dex’s flushed hot cheek. “Hey.”

Dex smiles, and it’s blinding. “Hey.” His voice is soft and earnest and not at all like he’s ever directed at Nursey before. “Does this mean we’re done taking our time now?”

“Well, Chowder does think we’re both assholes who deserve each other, and I wouldn’t wanna disappoint him.” Nursey grins, leaning forward. “Plus, I hear you’ve got a couple hundred bucks coming to you if I kiss you right now. Can’t have you losing that bet now, can we?”

“No, definitely can’t have that,” Dex murmurs, and then they’re kissing. And somehow, miraculously, Nursey has finally got his grumpy asshole roommate in his arms, the both of them now on exactly same page.

[soomstudies]

grocery shopping with svt

a/n: i!! went grocery shopping with my friends and suddenly got inspiration lol enjoy sorry the lengths are uneven AHAHAHA ( can be idol or non idol au )

Seungcheol

i feel he kinda tries to get only what’s on the shopping list

but he fails miserably at it

“we came here for eggs and rice only!”

“but the ramyeon... is on sale...”

carries all the shopping bags because he insists that he should do it

and even if he doesn’t insist, it kinda becomes the norm for him to carry

Jeonghan

he doesn’t go grocery shopping until you’re down to the very last ramyeon packet or the last cup of orange juice

when he realises, he immediately rushes out with you to go shopping

like you’re just chilling and suddenly

BAM

“we need to go shopping tonight.”

“sure”

he tries to buy as much as possible in one go so he doesn’t need to go again so soon??

y’all struggle a little carrying so many bags back to the dorm/house/apartment but he insists it’s better to struggle at once than to go all the time

yes i really had to use this gif for jeonghan

Jisoo

so you two go shopping pretty normally

it’s nothing super special

but he likes to shop with one hand holding the basket and the other holding yours

soft bb i love shua i mean who doesnt

and you guys talk about your day as you shop

about the cute cat you petted on your way to school/work

or about the new project hes working on

or sometimes you even complain about those stupid classmates/coworkers or at how annoying it is that the train was delayed

and as you’re complaining, he quietly adds some strawberries and chocolate into the basket

because the moment you go home, he rushes to make some nice strawberry chocolate desserts because he knows you love them

and he just wants to make you feel better and make sure you end your day well!

and after a delicious dinner that you may or may not have cooked together,

you two fall asleep satisfied with your tummy filled, and cuddled together under the warm blanket

Jun Hui

sneaky boi he makes sure you two eat before shopping so you’re not hungry and impulse buy

psychological stuff yo

he’s not cheap he just wants to stick to the list

because if not i feel he just impulse buys a lot ;;

you: hey im gonna go grocery shopping tomorrow, you wanna come?

him: !!! yes!! but after dinner

you: sure sounds good

it usually works pretty well

just that sometimes he gets so excited about dinner with you that you two completely forget to go grocery shopping 

smh cuties

it ends up you have to go on a completely different day

even then sometimes he makes a booking for a nice restaurant that’s nowhere near a supermarket

and the process repeats

but how can you blame him? he just loves spending time with you

hes a cute dork hes the best

Soonyoung

hes the one who wants you to sit in the trolley and pretends its a racecar

going nYOOOOOOM down the aisles and drifting to the next one

you kinda fear for your life

but don’t worry hes got it under control!

for the most part.

there was this one time he accidentally let go of you and you went right into a tower of chocolate powder tins.

it was super embarrassing and no one stops teasing either of you over it.

you two raced in the grocery store a little less after that but still occasionally do have your fun!

Wonwoo

you know the video of the dude making ikea puns with his gf?

yeah that’s wonwoo in the grocery store

and he does it in this really monotonous voice

“hey... do you think we should’ve taken a trolley instead of a basket?”

“hm? why?”

“i don’t think we have mushroom left”

“...”

“...”

his nose scrunches up in his iconic laugh and you have to laugh because hes so adorable!!!!

“but really, i think we need a trolley instead”

Jihoon

the type to go to the grocery store and stand in the freezer aisle for ten minutes in the summer

he’s not browsing he just wants free aircon

hes also the one who sees grocery shopping as a chore the most. :(

if hes alone he tends to just grab what he needs and get out as quickly as possible

but if hes with you he doesn’t mind have to stay a little longer and ponder over which type of ramyeon he wants most that week or which packaging of cola he wants to have today

he wont say it, but if it gives him an excuse to spend a little more time with you, he’ll stay

Ming Hao

the one whos a master at finding discounts and the most “worth-it” item.

you: “let’s just get the 4 pack one...”

hes keying it into his phone calculator

“no no this is better. buy 5 get 1 free”

he just puts it in the trolley and you go with it

you: hm. looks like the cereal price increased a little...

him: the cereal whAT?!??! excuse me who the Fuck decided they can do this

“boi u can buy gucci???? but not a little more pricey cereal????????”

“look ok-”

Mingyu

hes the main reason i wanted to write this ok 

as a man who can cook, he must go grocery shopping once a week

he likes to drag you along

if you’re short he likes to tease you because you can’t reach things

like you’re halfway diving into the icecream freezer because the icecream you want is at the very back and he’ll just be giggling for a bit

of course he helps you in the end what a gentleman

lol jk he puts it even further at the back

because he really loves seeing your cute pout and you hitting him lightly in annoyance

and he really just likes to spend time with you so he drags this on for as long as possible until he finally helps and passes you the icecream you wanted

ugh im so soft for bf!mingyu :(

Seokmin

he does the thing that dude in the vine does where he pronounces everything weirdly

i can see him doing it in his high tone rap voice too

“yo look at these kehloggeh’s frosetitties flakuhs” 

“ras kraspas yo”

i really dont know how to write what hes saying forgive me

and sometimes he will pronounce regular korean words in a really bad foreigner accent??

“당근 구매하자” -> “danggoon gumayhayjya” pardon google translate

overall super fun to shop with and always makes you laugh while shopping

Seungkwan

i feel that... he (like minghao) tries to buy food at a cheaper rate...

to the point he buys wholesale.

he also likes to phone his mom a lot

mama boo knows whats best

whatever she suggests, he will buy straight away, and he’ll make sure to get enough for you too

except cucumber and tomato

he steers very clear of those

Hansol 

the worst at grocery shopping sorry

like you HAVE to go together because if you don’t,

hes just walking around with his headphones in and spacing out while looking for some peanut butter idk (like im sure yall seen the clap choreo video)

cute

when you go shopping together, he makes sure to take out his earphones but he likes to hum a lot when you guys shop

he also likes to talk a lot about new artists he’s into and songs he likes!

and even though it’s been a long day and you had to go shopping or starve,

because it’s his voice, you feel at peace and like all the stress has left you

hes your healing <3

Chan

a little different and cliche this is way longer than expected

you were shopping late at night and realised you wanted to buy some squid for supper

you go to the seafood section and are relieved to see there’s just one left

sp you run to it but you grab it at the same time as some really cute guy

the two of you look at each other for a while in awkwardness but he finally lets go and says “sorry, you can have it”

mc why didnt u talk to him

the next week you went again for shopping but guess what happened at the fruit aisle this time?

the dude from before is there and he grabbed the same pack of blueberries!

he lets you take it once again

and this just keeps happening all the time, even when you try to go at different times??

sometimes he lets you take it sometimes he asks for it claiming “the hyungs will kill me” whatever that means

one day he’s with a friend and the moment they see you, they start walking to you very quickly

??? two cute guys coming closer what they doin

the friend pushes him to you and tells him “ok chan go talk to the cute person”

he very awkwardly goes “hi i’m lee chan and uh... well i think you’re pretty cute. could we go shopping together sometimes?”

he’s nervous and blushing and cute and hoW CAN YOU SAY NO

it’s the start of the cutest relationship

[writinghq]

😃 headcanons for ushijima? Fluff headcanons?

hey! hikari was struggling to find some inspiration for this lmao but voila, here it is! we hope you enjoy! i have the slightest feeling she based this off me smh

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

“Hold on tight.”

“R-right.”

“Alright. Pedal.”

It was their first date together, yet for some reason they were sitting on a bike, with Ushijima holding them and the bike upright from behind

“How did I end up in this position?” Ushijima’s s/o thought to themselves

Ushijima had planned this whole first date down to a tee

Picking them up at their house, heading to a nearby cafe, taking a walk to the park, renting bikes to ride together, grabbing ice cream afterwards, walking by the river as the sun was setting

Tendou did send Ushijima’s s/o a message the night before to “expect nothing less from our captain”

Tendou must’ve had a lot of fun helping Ushijima put together this shoujo manga-like plan

Ushijima’s s/o was having a bit of trouble stifling their laughter as Ushijima relayed the whole plan out to them when he arrived to pick them up

Nevertheless, they found it absolutely adorable

There was just a little problem

They couldn’t ride bike

They didn’t know how

Ushijima’s s/o enjoyed the first part of the date, but the worry still lingered in their mind

How would they tackle the situation when it came?

Should they wing it?

No, there’s no way you can just “wing” riding a bike

They were almost finished with the third step, walking to the park, when Ushijima’s s/o finally admitted to Ushijima about the matter

“… You don’t know how to ride a bike?”

“I’ve never gotten around to learning it.”

Ushijima’s eyes widened slightly, enough for his s/o to confirm that this really was a shocking confession

A hint of guilt clenched in their chest

“I’m sorry I ruined your date plan.”

Their eyes that had been on him throughout the date were now look down at the ground, embarrassed and guilty

They both stopped in their tracks, right in front of the entrance to the park, an air of silence around them

“Ushijima—“

“Do you not like bikes?”

“It’s not that, it really is just that I never had the chance to—“

Ushijima’s s/o doesn’t even get to finish their sentence as Ushijima takes a hold of their hands

He grips their hands gently and leans his face a bit closer to their own face

His gaze was locked on to theirs

Ushijima’s s/o felt like their lungs had stopped working for a moment there

Maybe their heart too

“Wait here for a bit.”

He retreats, releases their hands, and runs off somewhere  

Ushijima’s s/o was still a stunned by what had just happened

It took a minute calm down their heart, that was now beating strongly

As instructed, they waited at the exact spot he had left them

In a few short minutes, Ushijima came back, bringing a single bike with him

His s/o ran a few scenarios through their head as they opened their mouth to speak

“I-Is that for you…?”

“No. You.”

Their face scrunched up into that expression of theirs that indicated confusion

Their eyes widened, their eyebrows furrowed, their nostrils flared a little bit, and their mouth went into a little pout

“Bikes were next on the plan.”

Ushijima’s s/o’s expression remains the same

Ushijima’s usual monotonous expression cracks into a small smile

He extends his right hand to them, his left supporting the bike

“Let’s go.”

They made their way to a section of the park that was vacated so that there won’t be any… casualties

It took a quite a while for them to even get on the bike

Ushijima held the bike upright as his s/o examined it as if it were some foreign and complex contraption

“So, I just lift my leg over here, sit down, put my feet on the pedals, and hold on?”

“Yes.”

“And you’re positive I won’t fall?”

“There’s no guarantee.”

They take a few steps away from the bike, and Ushijima silently watches as his s/o jumps around to try to shake off the panic

They look straight into Ushima’s eyes with a look that begged for mercy  

“Ushijima!”

“As long as you do it right, you won’t fall.”

His s/o does a little pout at him before finally coming closer to the bike and getting on

Ushijima makes a small comment about how the grass could serve as a cushion if ever they may fall to ease their worries, but it only makes them panic again

“Maybe this isn’t a good idea after all! Uh, can you just hold on the entire time?”

“But then I wouldn’t be able to teach you properly.”

“But I don’t trust myself to be able to pull this off!”

“___.”

They turn around at the call of their name

“You can do this.”

“O-okay.”

They face forward again and grip strongly onto the handle bars, bracing themselves for what was up ahead

“I got you, so all you need to do is focus on what’s in front of you.”

They turn to Ushijima, a small gracing their lips

Ushijima returns the smile, slightly

They face forward again, trying to hide how their smile was growing bigger and bigger

“O-okay! Let’s go.”

“Hold on tight.”

“R-right.”

“Alright. Pedal.”

There was a lot of questions going around their head, but Ushijima had told them to focus so that was what they were going to do

They took a deep breath before pressing down on that right pedal

They were pedaling slowly on the paved walkways, Ushijima holding them up from behind the whole time

Things were starting to go quite smoothly, so he assumed it was about time he let go

He released his hands from the back of the bike, and his s/o started moving straight forward on their own

For at least three seconds

As soon as they discovered his absence from behind them, the panic rose again and they started tipping towards the left

Ushijima quickly rushes forward and holds on to them and the bike before they fell too far

His s/o whips their head towards him, silent and frozen panic spread across their face

Ushijima gives them a small pat on their head, though their expression remained unchanging

“… I’m sorry.”

They slowly turn their head straight forward

“It’s okay.”

“Maybe we should keep moving slowly for a bit longer.”

“Yes, please.”

They proceeded as they did before, his s/o slowly pedaling, and him supporting them from behind

This went on for awhile

As time passed, they were starting to get the hang of it

The pace picked up a bit, and Ushijima felt that he didn’t have to put in that much effort to hold them up straight anymore

It seemed that they were able to find their own balance already

Of course, his s/o was completely unaware of their progress

And from what happened before, Ushijima thought that maybe it would be for the best if he stayed silent about it for a bit longer

Gently, he let go, and he watched as they rolled on forward on their own

The gentle breeze blew at their hair and the setting sun shone on them just right, making it seem as if they were sparkling, the scene tainted by the color orange

Ushijima couldn’t tear his eyes away from the sight

His steps came to a halt as he continued to admire the scene

“Beautiful,” he silently thought to himself

His heart fluttered, but he still didn’t fully understand why, even if he already was in the relationship

Both of them had been there the whole day, and sure, Ushijima’s plan had already been scrapped at this point, but it didn’t matter to him anymore

These feelings were only confirmed at the sound of his s/o’s voice, now in the usual cheerful tones that he knew and loved

“Hey! Ushijima! This is actually quite fun!”

There was no response

His s/o called out to him a bit louder

“Ushijima?”

Ushijima responded from behind

“You’re doing it!”

His s/o kept their eyes and head ahead as they continued speaking to Ushijima

“I am?!”

“You are!”

“Oh my gosh!”

Ushijima can hear their laughter tickle his ear and his chest starts feeling all tingly

He lets out a breath through the nose before slowly walking closer to his s/o who was now getting faster and faster

He made sure they were always in sight, and he continued to follow them around the park

They biked all the way to the nearby lake, the sunlight dancing on the water

“Ushijima! I’m actually riding a bike!”

A small chuckle escapes his lips

“You are.”

“Ushijima!”

“Yes?”

“How do you stop this thing?”

Ushijima realized that the bike was now heading straight for the lake, showing no signs of stopping

Actually it was speeding up

Who decided to make a downslope near the lake of all places?

Ushijima picked up the pace, charging straight for them

He pulled them off the bike and rolled onto the grass

The bike rolled on for a bit more before falling onto its side, right before the water

Both of their heart rates were up, one from physical effort, and the other from emotional stress

Ushijima immediately started checking his s/o for injuries

“I’m fine, I’m fine. But seriously, that was something.”

They let out a laugh

“And you actually were right about the grass.”

Ushijima’s expression was unchanging, but his s/o noticed his arms around them, and how strong his hold was

He turned his gaze away

“Maybe the bike wasn’t such a good idea after all. I’m sorry.”

His s/o tilted their head at him

After all, they had so much fun today

What was there to apologize for?

“Hey.”

Ushijima turns to them once again

His s/o then plants a small peck onto his cheek

His eyes widen slightly

“Don’t apologize. I loved today. Thank you.”

They give him a smile

Ushijima stares at them for a second longer right before burying his face into their shoulder

He was making attempts to fix the expression on his face that even he didn’t know

He couldn’t understand how so much emotions could well up inside him from just one smile

“I enjoyed today immensely as well.”

Ushijima’s s/o pats him on the head before releasing themselves from the embrace and standing up

Ushijima looks up at them

“Wait here for a bit.”

They then run off somewhere

Obediently, Ushijima waits on the grass

They come back, two ice cream cones in hand

“Is that for you?”

“How can I eat two ice cream cones on my own?”

They take a seat in the space next to him on the grass and hands him one cone

“Ice cream was next on the plan, right?”

Ushijima takes the cone silently, choosing to admire the person in front of him rather than the food

“Yes.”

[anonymoushouseplantfan]

A DM comment regarding MM's recent comments at the BBC forum: "Her response was rather argumentative and focused on semantics, as her intellect is lacking to do anything else. It was simply not good manners." THIS. It's quite possibly why I find her to be disengenious. She speaks in platitudes & regurgitates common media sound bites (remember the CNN comments regarding Trump's misogyny). This whole idea of her being some feminist or great intellectual or "humanitarian" is completely hollow. 1

I really did prefer her candor in her former blog (even if she did come across as a diva) but it was her voice - not contrived, canned messaging. Thought we mighy see more of her "whip-smart" chat and conversational prowess on display during the easy PR walkabouts in Birmingham, Cardiff, Briston but all we got is "so amazing", "uh-huh", "exactly", "absolutely". SMH. It's become quite apparent how contrived she really is, hasn't it? I honestly didn't think it would happen this quickly though! 2

I really did prefer her candor in her former blog (even if she did come across as a diva) but it was her voice - not contrived, canned messaging. Thought we mighy see more of her "whip-smart" chat and conversational prowess on display during the easy PR walkabouts in Birmingham, Cardiff, Briston but all we got is "so amazing", "uh-huh", "exactly", "absolutely". SMH. It's become quite apparent how contrived she really is, hasn't it? I honestly didn't think it would happen this quickly though! 2

This is all true, but the weirdest part is that it’s affecting Harry too. His last speech was veering into Meghan’s patented “word salad with monotone delivery” territory.

It’s pretty clear now that it took a cast of thousands to make Meghan sound good. I’m now pretty impressed with Kruger Cowne’s coaching staff. They pulled a miracle with that UN speech. Ditto the pilates girl and lion medallion guy who wrote her Tig articles. Ditto the NBC glam squads who kept her clothes neat and her hair brushed. 

Plaid Coat Amy has her work cut out for her with this one. People thought they were getting the Meghan who spoke eloquently about representation at the UN and wrote about women’s hygiene in Time Magazine, but instead they are getting “grilled lettuce” Meghan.