#communication is hard work
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No one is born knowing how to communicate
A: And that's okay...
Dr Kuseno made it look so easy. He just swanned into Saitama's apartment, proferred him a gift of beef and the hero's hostility melted away.
Fubuki felt positively foolish, and yet encouraged.
Since then, however, she's found that the only thing meat bribes pull in are dogs. Literal dogs:
And even dogs need more than meat to be loyal.
What gives? Well, it's obvious that Fubuki mistook Dr Kuseno's gift for a bribe: more on that later. Probably. And yeah, it's funny, but it's more interesting than that.
Learning how to communicate is complex. There are a ludicrous number of unspoken conventions and rules in every human society, so much so that we don't fully learn how to smile socially until we're in our forties. Dr Kuseno carefully judged his gift: he had a legitimate reason to offer Saitama a gift in the first place, out of gratitude for Saitama going out of his way to mentor Genos. Then he chose a gift Saitama would be sure to appreciate and presented it at a time when Saitama would be thinking about dinner. The worst that could have happened is that Saitama took the gift but insisted on the doctor going home (and taking Genos with him) -- it would still have left the desired positive impression. And things went really well. Kuseno made it look effortless.
Fubuki is only in her early twenties and her experience to date has been far from typical. She's learned that either she can intimidate people or she can flatter them into doing what she wants. With Saitama (and later Bang, Bomb, and Kuseno), she has to learn how to talk to more powerful people whom she cannot overpower, over whom she has no leverage, and who are unimpressed by her looks, simpering, or flattery.
Fortunately, Fubuki is nothing if not astute. She's worked out that she needs to develop complementary skills if she's to make herself useful to the S-Class heroes she wants to hang with. How to talk to them to get the help and cooperation she desires? Ah, that's a work in progress.
B: ...Unless it's not
Let's move onto another miscommunication.
Something that I hadn't before was that, unlike the webcomic version where Saitama only thinks to himself that Genos seems depressed, in the manga, Saitama out and out asks him if this is the case. He wants to know.
It mirrors King asking Saitama that very same question and getting Saitama to open up and be vulnerable for the first time (ever, in any version of the story). So it is very appropriate to see Saitama trying to do the same for Genos, particularly as he is openly fond of the guy.
However, it goes wrong. Saitama feels himself under pressure to say something wise to make it better. So he puts on his best 'confident' face and inadvertently makes everything much worse. Oh dear. What makes this particularly painful in the manga is that Saitama is much more invested in trying to reach Genos, and it's made Genos think that Saitama saying that he doesn't see what he's doing must mean that earlier times when he's praised him must have been just Saitama being nice. For sure, Genos could have pushed back and made Saitama clarify what he meant, but he's even worse at communicating: and Saitama's glib remark about being bright struck him square in the insecurities.
I'm going to come to something that I only realised once I started typing this up. Even though I've pointed out their abilities to communicate, neither King nor Kuseno have the perfect words to say. Kuseno started out by first committing a faux pas in bringing his great big outside boots into Saitama's flat, then nearly boring Saitama to death with a long-winded explanation. King started out by trying to guess what was bothering Saitama. Both, however, did the most important thing about effective communication: they picked up on their going wrong and changed tack.
It's not about saying the right thing: it's about responding to the person you're talking to.
The thing that King did that Saitama was trying to do for Genos was to ask Saitama open questions, and shut up in the interim, letting Saitama talk to fill in the silence. He'd only speak to ask more open questions when Saitama ran out of things to say, and through that, gently started to challenge Saitama's thinking.
But doing so means being comfortable with several seconds of silence. And that is excruciating. It is almost irresistible to jump in and say something, anything. And it would have been a longish wait, for Genos to slowly sit down and decide to start speaking, which might well have started being about something only tangentially related to his worry. King did that for Saitama: Saitama started out talking about what was bothering him on the surface -- being too strong -- before eventually coming to what was really bothering him, feeling lonely and profoundly isolated from everyone around him. Saitama does not yet know how to wait a person out.
It's a problem in this case because it's introduced a big barrier between those two, not an insurmountable one for sure, but one that could easily compound later.
Ah well, no one is born a communicator. We just have to wait and see if they work out a way to open up and be honest with each other. So it goes! There's more ways to introduce conflicts than to have a monster trample Tokyo, after all!
And so help me, the struggle to learn how to communicate is 1000% worthwhile.
#OPM#meta#Saitama#Genos#Dr Kuseno#Fubuki#King#communication is hard work#I love how well ONE brings across some of its subtleties#the pressure we put ourselves under to stay the 'right thing' when listening and openly receiving what we're hearing is more important#the true struggles for the characters are rarely monsters#but rather lie within themselves and between the people they want to understand#damn that's a little too IRL for comfort#ah well no one is born knowing how -- let's all struggle forward to do better!
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I have been sketching. So much tma. Here's some expansions on my Jon and Martin designs I've been doing.
Another note I forgor to mention is I love how after hearing Simon go "it's enough to make your hair turn white" about Martin's office in s4 many of us collectively agreed his hair turned white because of his association with the Lonely. The shared consciousness is real and we use it to play hot potato with the communal brain cell dedicated to the sillies.
Closeup of apocalypse boyfriends (also to the person who said they love my s5 Jon's fancy white girl updo: I think about that every day)
#s5 Jon in his white girl era#whatever the fuck that means#I'm still not done w the archives cuz busy n stuff but Jon needs to let Martin know wtf goin on#God may work in mysterious ways but you do not have to. Communicate with your man please#my art#the magnus archives#tma fanart#tma#tma season 5#tma spoilers#jonathan sims#tma podcast#martin blackwood#tma jmart#jmart#jmart fanart#jonmartin#there's so much going on in these and I am not sorry welcome to my chaotic mind#hope y'all read the tags cuz I need to announce before I fully make my Jon character sheet that his favorite band is linkin park#it's so funny and just right#tbf linkin park goes hard I'm tired of pretending it doesnt#but come on he totally was totally an edgey prick when he was younger#and older. he hasnt changed huh#anygays he totally loves linkin park and type o negative and three days grace and green day and evanescence#georgie was a paramore girlie I just know it#wish gerry were here he and jon would jam to type o negative so much :( and jon could introduce him to this cold night :(((#ok enough byeeeee
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UGHH TPOT 14 KILLED ME i love twogaty & now theres angst... great 💔
#object shows#tpot#twogaty#fanart#two tpot#tpot gaty#object show community#PPLEEASSEEEE REBLOG I WORKED SO HARD FOR THIS#gattwo
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By the way, when I say that I really do believe that we will make it, I am 100% saying that as someone who has been following good news extensively + basically daily for over two years now, and has come to that conclusion slowly and deliberately, based on extensive available evidence. It's not a platitude. I genuinely do mean it, and I could write you a whole dissertation on all the reasons why.
(you know. if I had the time and an in-progress doctorate. rip.)
#worth emphasizing that I am NOT a scientist#but I do have years of experience working in science communication#which is weird to say tbh#partly because we also did a lot of things that weren't science (or were more indirectly science)#and partly because psychology is so often considered not a science or not a “hard science”#but technically my professional specialty literally is mental health and Evidence Based psychology#anyway#not news#me
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Batman 'firing' Robin will never sit well with me because having the authority to fire someone implies they applied for a job, and a job includes payment.
So, Batman firing Robin is like saying he's paying Robin for doing his job. Except, is he paying? The simple answer would be no, but then the next logical option is assuming that the payment comes with everything he does for a Robin.
Since Batman provides the equipment he has the right to take it back and that's not the part that bothers me. What bothers me is that there's another crucial thing that Batman does for Robin: provide a home.
And while, yes, Batman's intention isn't to take away the safe space of Robin or to make him believe he's making him leave his house, intentions don't matter in miscommunication.
Firing Robin means not 'paying' him anymore. It means taking away what he's giving him because he isn't doing his job correctly.
For Robin, it means losing his home.
#i don't think I'm making sense#but basically it's a matter of miscommunication and misunderstandings#this is mostly about dick grayson but it can apply to any robin if you want it to#i think this perception of Batman's actions is specially easy to misinterpret for Dick because he wasn't adopted before he was fired#i beg Bruce to learn to communicate better because kids can give a whole new meaning to badly expressed words#Batman trying to protect Robin always backfires because of this#bruce wayne#batman#robin#dick grayson#dc robin#dc comics#dc#this is why dick worked so hard to become independent
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I love how basically the entire ninjago community is in agreement that Arin shouldn’t get powers bc that would ruin the point of his character but the nexo knights community is just totally chill with clay getting powers even though that also ruins the point of his character
#ninjago#nexo knights#ninjago arin#clay moorington#literally clay is not special in any way he’s a normal guy and he only became a knight bc he dedicated himself to it and worked hard#the entire point is that he’s a normal guy who’s not special or inherently talented#god please nexo knights community please realize this
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Sharing valuable resources is one of the most important ways borrowers show that they have bonded with another individual/family/clan.
You are a human who has recently discovered the borrower living somewhere in your home.
You have been as gentle and reassuring with them as can be. They still seem skittish, preferring to run away than have a conversation. But at least they've started accepting the food you leave out for them! You were worried about their diet.
Then one morning, when you stumble into the kitchen for breakfast, in place of the food you left out, you find a perfectly butchered rat. Gutted, cleaned, skinned and presented to you on the once clean plate.
It's a valuable gift. Clearly a lot of time and energy went into this.
But you're not a borrower, you're a human. And there's a dead rat on your counter. What do you do when the (still skittish) tiny person starts bringing you cat gifts?
#to reject it may be interpreted as disdain for the hard work and lifestyle of the borrower#it would put your efforts to befriend the tiny back by months#a scenario for the G/t girlies#g/t#g/t community
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The Valentine kitchen ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི₊ ⊹
#i need to work on my interior screenshots ugh#interiors are not my strongest suit :( it’s so hard#interiors*#valentine*#the sims 4#ts4#sims 4#s4#sims 4 screenshots#sims 4 interior#sims 4 build#sims 4 aesthetic#simblr#showusyourbuilds#show us your builds#the sims community#sims 4 gameplay#ts4 simblr
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Writing: Things I Learnt the Hard Way #5
If you can’t seem to figure out your plot, you might be making it too easy for your characters. Make more people hate them, take away their resources and limit their initial knowledge. This will also help your exposition come naturally over the course of the story instead pouring everything out on page one.
Your characters have to want something.
#my writing tips#female writers#writers life#writing is hard#creative writing#writer#writing stuff#creative writers#writing#tumblr writers#aspiring writer#tumblr writing community#writer problems#queer writers#writersblr#writers and poets#writerscommunity#writing community#ao3 writer#writblr#writing problems#writing blog#writer stuff#writing thoughts#writers on tumblr#writing life#writeblr#worldbuilding#work in progress#book adaptation
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#for survivors#trauma#abuse#doing the work#doing the hard stuff#healing#recovery#self compassion#give yourself credit#mental health#not everything is a gift#not everything is meant to teach you a lesson#community care#get some help
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I feel like she'd get a kick out of watching me play Skyrim, considering how awful I am at it
#i know this isnt how lighting works. but. hear me out:#my wife is pretty#sorry for the sloppy doodles ive been pretty caught up in the music and school and everything so it's hard to polish a piece rn#trying reeeal hard to still make some time for my wife in between it all bc she deserves everything#jasver 🧡#silver's art#self ship#fictional other#yumeship#self ship community#steven universe self ship
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One thing that's starting to really get to me with the James Somerton stuff is a real strong undercurrent of disdain toward his fans. And yeah, I was one of them. A good scam artist isn't as easy to spot as y'all seem to think. You forget that you have all the information right now. Two days ago most of you had never heard of him and it would have kept going. Anyone can fall for a scam, nobody is immune. I would love to have had whatever resources you guys think we all should magically know about so I could have kept my sad $5 a month I really needed but thought was going to something worthwhile. Some of us can only devote so much energy into things and when you have no idea whatsoever that something is amiss of course you're not going to go digging for sources, why would you when everything is fine as far as you know? I really wish I could have seen the dissenting opinions on him but for many, many reasons that aren't just that the dissenting voices weren't widely circulating at the time all I had was the thought every now and again that "huh that doesn't seem right" and then go on with my day. And I think that happened to a lot of us. So yeah. Say what you gotta say about Somerton, he has more than earned it with the damage he's caused, but maybe don't shit so hard on his former fans because that is going to be you someday with something, it happens to everyone sooner or later.
#james somerton#hbomberguy#todd in the shadows#I really am greatful for Harris and Todd's hard work in exposing all of this#and I am glad I get to see the real voices I did like that james was stealing#I'm just tired of all these people jumping on the drama train taking a dump on folks who are also victims of these crimes#razz rambles#this whole situation is upsetting me in the weirdest ways#I'm distraught but I'm not at the same time#and yet it's 6am and I can't stop reading through the tags and seeing the takes I missed#vaspider's essay and remarks from an AIDS pandemic survivor are especially good#I lived through that shit too but had no idea I was living through it#cuz that's what being blind and impoverished in rural community was like#queer wasn't even something I knew I could be until like 2010#so it's nice to see my own history#it's not just the young queers who have little to no knowledge of our history
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YT link
#art#my art#animation#animation meme#video#ii#inanimate insanity#osc#object show community#mephone4 ii#suitcase ii#knife ii#mephone x ii#pickle ii#taco ii#fan ii#paintbrush ii#apple ii#bow ii#steve cobs#siiigh i know its hard to see bows face i shouldve made it darker#but ive been working on it for a while i didnt wanna replace everything#but whatever!!!#at least its done finallyyyy#I CAN WORK ON SOMETHING ELSE NOW!!!!!!!!! YEAAAAAAAA#also#the song is pretty cvnt#in case you wanted to know :3#ill update this with the yt link when i wake up. this is scheduled#my animations
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Tim I noticed a lot of indigenous patches on your jacket, are you Native?
Idk what my dad was 'cause I never knew him, but yeah my mom is (or... Was.. I guess..) Muscogee, the tribe native to the part of Alabama I'm in.
If I remember correctly she came to Alabama from Oklahoma (where a lot of Natives were displaced to in the 1800s) to "get back to her roots."
But yknow, I was separated from her in childhood (which tbh is upsettingly common for Native families) and I was raised in a very white very Catholic asylum so I'm not as connected to the culture as I'd like to be.
-Tim
#OOC: Olea speaking#this is kind of a self-indulgent headcanon but HEAR ME OUT it adds a lot to Tim's character specifically#we're talking about a character who was separated from his mom in childhood and locked up in a psych ward#suffers from chronic physical and mental illness made significantly worse by the institution that was supposed to be helping him#forced to regulate his emotions more than other people have to so he isnt misinterpreted as a threat#struggles with addiction#had to work twice as hard as anyone else in his friend group just to be given the same opportunities#a much more common experience inside BIPOC communities#and he clearly has ties to the land (especially the park) nobody else has#you know how in season 2 Alex starts yapping to Jay about how the park is cursed?#maybe he was right#maybe that *thing* has been here for hundreds of years#and nobody was ever able to settle the land so eventually the Department of Conservation turned it into a state park#and Tim isnt some random “patient zero”#but he has ancestral ties to the land and was more receptive/at risk to Operator Sickness (but was also more resistant to it long term)#JUST SAYIN 👀#im half Katu and I desire my comfort character to be a halfie with me we need more non-white rep in mh#ask.txt#marble hornets#mh#tim wright#afterlife au#slenderverse#Native!Tim
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Ok but what if I was a rental pet someone could sell to you and you could choose what clothes and wearing and what amount of clothes i'm wearing when i show up? And you could do anything from simply have me sleep in the same bed as you to getting off on pushing me around for hours on end? What if the idea of being handed off each night and not knowing if you're going to care for me or hurt me gets me off? Maybe having a few reoccuring customers whom i either look forwards to or dread?
#bottomposting#subposting#t4t nsft#wlw nsft#nb nsft#horrordynamic#butch sub#hard k1nk#dark k1nk#sex work tw#bd/sm pet#bd/sm blog#bd/sm puppy#bd/sm masochist#bd/sm community#bd/sm kink#bd/sm sadist#mommy k!nk#abuse k1nk#fear play#pain play#dubcon tw#bd/sm cnc
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I’m going to club with a two by four the next snide asshole who goes “only a lib would cry about the election results because they think voting is the only thing that matters.” Be so for real. The refugee organizations I’ve been working with for months boarded their doors up in anticipation of election violence, and now the inertia for our projects is cooling off because we’re going to lose our funding and the organization is restructuring toward “just keep people alive.” The election makes a material difference in my clients starving.
#it’s really hard to put in my time on *doing community work* island without any grant money#I didn’t see you there by the way 🧐#real firebomb a Walmart energy
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