#comfort zoning I don’t have the energy to do anything else

[crow-art-zone]

Trying to replicate graphite digitally. Maybe I’ll finish it later

[cuteniaarts]

@rokurookajima HI HELLO I’M CURRENTLY HALF ASLEEP BECAUSE IT IS 1:50 A.M AND I HAD A LONG DAY, BUT!! AS PROMISED, METALBANDERS AU RAAVA, RENDITION BY YOURS TRULY:

She’s judging you (¬`‸´¬) (you = Wan being a stinky bastard man /affectionate)

I HOPE YOU LIKE HER <3

[p1utofairy]

★ your next glow up?

note — i wasn't gonna post this now but i figured fuck it why not?! enjoy, my loves! this is for entertainment purposes only <3 take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. p.s. come in my ask box and tell me what you think!

PILE ONE.

pile mf ONE, you are really stepping into a new era! when i tell you this new you is gonna turn HEADS. tuh, you’re gonna be looking like new money. nicki minaj’s ‘new body’ verse is coming to mind lol “you ain’t fuck me, you fucked the old body. you ain’t fuck nicki, you fucked nicole body! ain’t no miles on this here new body, off with they heads these bitches is nobody’s.” OH YEAH OKAYYY, PILE 1. maybe you’ll be hitting the gym more, switching up your diet or possibly getting some cosmetic work done?

whatever you’re doing differently, it’s gonna be noticeable. people are gonna feel like something changed with you overnight like “um when did pile 1 get so bad?” and this isn’t to say you aren’t already attractive…there’s just something about your energy and confidence that just amplified x1000 and people are really gonna feel and see this change in you. you might start experimenting with your outfits a little more, giving off a more seductive vibe. it’s like you're breaking out of your comfort zone especially if you usually opt for baggier clothes or a more conservative look. wait cause why am i thinking of ‘pretty little liars’ when emily is talking to aria about hanna and she’s like “haven’t you heard? she’s the it girl now.” PERIOD, PILE ONE. giving serena page vibes from love island.

there will be a lot of talk about you and even if you don’t hear it directly, trust me, people are gonna try to keep tabs on you. i’m seeing people re-watch your instagram stories tryna figure out who took you that place and who you’re doing it with — oh these people are spiralingggg. this could very well be potential suitors tryna scope out the scenery, but they’re not sure if you’ll be interested in them. they might fear rejection because you just look so damn good and it looks like you’re in such a better space in life and got your shit together; whereas they feel like they lack the resources/finances to be with you. these potential love interests see you as high value, pile 1. they’re intimidated by your beauty and aura. you’ll be more so focused on attracting a partner that can actually make shit happen.

you don’t have time for the cat and mouse games. you want the real deal and i do see you getting the person that you want. you manifested this person into your life and i sense them feeling like they won the lottery with you! i’m hearing that you are sooo mesmerizing on the outside and your heart & personality makes you so much more beautiful. there’s layers to you and i think this next glow up will allow you to really shine and be yourself unapologetically – you’re leaning into the different aspects of yourself that makes you unique. if there’s anything you’ve got your mind set on or something specific you want to do, go for it! whatever you do, you’ll stand out effortlessly and be successful. say yes by floetry is coming to mind. “see, i’ve been watching you for awhile…your smile and style. wanna know if i can be with you for the night, alright.” i meannnnn need i say more?!

how to tap into this energy?

listen closely to your intuition! work on your third eye because i’m hearing that you’re a powerful manifester and you don’t even truly know it. even if you do know this, you start doubting yourself and limiting your own thoughts. always think big and bigger because it’s in your reach. don’t get so caught up in the “how?” because your manifestations can appear in many different ways, not just one. you have a clear vision into the future – you just gotta adjust your lens and focus on what it is that YOU want. who cares if it doesn’t make sense to anyone else, as along as you see the vision then it’s a go! listen to ‘i want it all’ by sharpay evans lol you need to embody that song and its energy.

PILE TWO.

hey, pile 2! i’m hearing you’ve been putting up with the bullshit for wayyyy too long and this next glow up is gonna be a proper FUCK YOU to all your haters! i feel like people take your kindness for weakness and you feel like you don’t get the respect you deserve. you can deal with a lot of passive aggression in your relationships or friendships and people expect for you to suck it up and be okay with it. what i’m mainly picking up is that you like to keep the peace. you don’t want to ruffle anyone’s feather, but it just makes it worse for you because you’re not truly expressing yourself and your emotions. this keeps you up at night like “ugh! i should’ve said this or I should’ve stuck up for myself and finally cussed so and so tf out.” but you don’t because you know why, pile 2? you’re better than them, simple as that.

you wouldn’t treat anybody how some people treat you, and the reality is that it’s so much harder to be nice than it is to be mean. anybody can be mean and say hurtful shit if they really wanted to, but to always be graceful and kind in the face of adversity and ignorance? rare af. +10000 aura points! don’t let anybody make you feel less than or like you can’t speak up for yourself. this next glow up you’re going to use your voice and really make it known that you are not to be fucked with, okay?! you will be standing your ground and really popping your shit in the most calm and collected way possible & people are gonna be like “wait…did [y/n] really just clock me like that?!” and you’re gonna be standing 10 toes down on it as you should. they’ll have no choice but to respect you lol. you will start to realize what is worth your time & energy and what isn’t.

you might start cutting off people that don’t mean you any good and really start to focus on yourself and your energy. no more walking on egg shells and sparing peoples feelings, this is YOUR life and you have a voice just as much as they do – so use it! i think you’ll also be meeting new friends & a potential love interest during this next glow up. i’m hearing ‘how stella got her groove back’ lol so yeah some of you might be playing the field a little bit.

some of you might just want something casual and nothing more because you just want to focus on your own healing journey. you’ll start to understand why things had to happen the way that they did & why certain relationships didn’t work out the way that you thought they would. you’ll be able to decipher what you are and aren’t willing to put up with and honestly i just see you bossing tf up and advocating for yourself no matter who doesn’t like it. that tiktok “nobody loves you baby! you should only love yourself – ON MY SOUL!” just randomly came to me lmfaooo this is your ‘i’m focusing on what really matters aka me’ era and i think it’s exactly what you need pile 2.

how to tap into this energy?

i think you need to transmute the negative energy that people try to project on you into something positive. 12:12 on the clock, yeah. like look at this way, if people doubt you, don’t respect you or don’t feel like your capable of achieving great things then use that to your advantage. let them underestimate you all they want, and then BAM boss up on them and show them who tf you are. what they don’t know only makes you stronger. you have the power to make some powerful ass connections and make a name for yourself so be calculated & strategic with your moves. people will be eating their words when it comes to you, pile 2.

PILE THREE.

pile 3 your next glow up is gonna be a bit of an emotional rollercoaster ngl, but very rewarding nonetheless. i’m hearing that one tiktok sound “you gotta take the good with the bad, smile with the sad. love what you got and remember what you had.” so yeah i think you’re really gonna be figuring out how to transmute your energy and create something from it – whether that be a job opportunity, a love offer, a trip, etc. there’s something that you really want and you’re doing the work to make it happen. you have the plan, you just need the platform lol.

for some of you, i see a major relationship coming to an end. this could be a lover or a best friend, but this person will be exposed because they’re not who you thought they were. this person has very sneaky/deceptive energy and you’ve been in the dark about this for way too long. this person/connection means a lot to you, so you will feel like this is a tough situation to completely walk away from; but my sweet pile 3’s you will be more than okay! you will be spectacular! 10:10 was just on the clock.

allow yourself to sort through your emotions and learn from the situation, don’t let it weigh you down. sometimes we get too caught up in how long we’ve been with somebody and all of the good memories we made with them, that makes us hesitant to move on. sometimes things just run its course and you’re no longer in alignment with that person. you can’t force anything or anyone in your life that doesn’t align with your highest self and that can be very hard to process when emotions are involved but i’m happy to let you know there’s light at the end of the tunnel.

i see some of you traveling to a place you’ve always wanted to go and possibly meeting a potential love interest. in this next glow up, you’ll be doing things that you’ve always wanted to do cause there’s no one holding you back. you’re stepping out of your comfort zone and just taking a leap of faith – high risk, high reward. you’re gonna be making time for yourself and also prioritizing your hobbies/interests. this is beautiful, pile 3. i see you really getting in touch with who you are at the core. be kind and gentle with yourself, because you are a precious gem that a lot of people value and care about.

how to tap into this energy?

stop giving your power away. work on your throat chakra, my loves. your voice is your power and it’s one of the major keys to your success. a closed mouth doesn’t get fed, so you need to speak up and communicate what it is that YOU want and not just say what people want to hear. this next glow up will really have you standing in your power. release is needed especially verbally cause you know that tight feeling you get in your throat when you’re tryna stop yourself from crying? yeah no more of that. no more walking on egg shells, pile 3. say what you feel and stand on it & watch how the tides turn in your favor. mwah!

PILE FOUR.

alright, pile 4! for this next glow up i see you moving. some of you might actually be moving into a new home or apartment and it’s gonna grant you so much peace and comfort. for others of you, this could be you moving on emotionally from a toxic relationship and/or familial bond and finally getting the clarity and peace you need to cut all ties and move onto something better. whatever the situation may be, it was weighing heavy on you and making you feel very down.

you’re gonna feel so free when you leave this situation behind, it’s not even funny. i’m hearing that you were a gilded bird in a cage. some of you could’ve been moving from place to place, not feeling quite settled or financially stable. if you feel lost right now and like you don’t know what to do with your life/where it’s taking you, i just wanna say keep going – W.A.Y.S. by jhené aiko is coming to mind. “if there's one thing that i learned while in those county lines, is that everything takes time. you have gotta lose your pride, you have gotta lose your mind just to find your peace of mind.” awww yeah that’s your theme song for this next glow up. things might not make sense right now, but please trust me when i say that everything is going to work out in your favor & things will be better than you could ever imagine.

you will be blessed with the tools you need to get to this next phase of your life. you are the source, pile 4. whatever you put your mind to, you can surely achieve! don’t let 3D circumstances throw you off, you are so abundant and prosperous you will see in this next glow up just how much of a powerful manifester you really are. you’re still trying to find yourself and figure out where you fit in in the world, but you don’t have to put yourself in a box, pile 4. pave your own way and once you do others will want to follow suit. no one can see your future the way that you do, so keep doing your thing because i’m seeing that you will come across people/friends that share similar interests and niches as you. awww pile 4 you’re going to find your soul tribe.

you have this flighty energy about you (air sign energy/esp gemini) like you’re from one thing to the next and you can’t figure out what you truly want to do. some of you might be in college or almost about to graduate and when people ask you “do you know what you want to do?” you’re like uhhhh….]>|>]^>.]€]€]£ like you truly don’t know but like that’s okay cause actually you do know! on a soul level, you know. what’s understood doesn’t have to be explained pile 4 lol people might not get it now but when you pop out living the life you’ve always dreamed of, TUH. they’ll understand then.

how to tap into this energy?

get out of your head so much and just vibe, pile 4. you can plan plan plan all you want but the reality is: shit happens! it might annoy you or make you feel incredibly frustrated when another problem or inconvenience pops up in your life, but there’s nothing you can’t overcome. it’s life. you will be greatful for these experiences in the long run because it will be another bridge that you’ve already crossed and dealt with, so you won’t fold under pressure – you’ll just already know what to do. you got this, pile 4. shit is about to get really good for you.

[violetrainbow412-blog]

Day 23: stormy night

Masterlist flufftober 🎃

Reblog if you liked it!

You were sitting comfortably on your sofa, watching who knows what on TV while listening to the shower blending with the storm raging outside.

Unfortunately for your boyfriend, the weather event had caused a power outage in his building, so he called you to see if he could spend the night with you. He needed to shower, iron his clothes in the morning, charge his phone, and review some work files, making it impossible to do those tasks in the dark.

They say that the misfortune of some is the fortune of others, for although your boyfriend had to step out of his comfort zone, you were extremely grateful that he was there. You hated storms; they always made you very nervous, and you usually couldn’t sleep when one was raging outside. That’s why you were happy.

Maybe it was a somewhat archaic idea; however, having your man at home made you feel extremely safe and protected.

You were covered with a gray diamond-patterned blanket, waiting for the hot chocolate in your kettle to finish boiling when you heard the sound of water in the bathroom stop. You knew that Spencer was probably too tired to want anything more than a quiet night, so when you headed toward the bathroom, you did so with no other intention.

You knocked twice, just as a matter of courtesy, and he opened the door. He was wearing a red robe with a black trim, and in his hands rested a brown towel that he was likely about to use to dry his hair.

As soon as he saw you, he asked if something was wrong, given your anxious expression. You still hadn’t dared to tell him about your fear of storms, so he couldn’t know.

“It’s nothing. I just wanted to see you,” you replied, moving closer to him to try to hug him.

“You’re going to get soaked,” he murmured. Still, he didn’t reject the contact.

“You’re so warm; how is that possible if you just showered?”

“The water. While cold temperatures have some extra health benefits, I always shower with hot water because it helps reduce tension in the muscles and relaxes me. It’s like… a moment to disconnect from everything.”

“I hope I’m not ruining it,” you murmured, looking up to meet his eyes.

The height difference between you was something that had always driven you crazy, especially the way he looked at you—with so much love.

“Not at all. You’re actually improving it.” You were about to say something else when a thunderclap resonated in the distance, making you jump into your boyfriend’s arms “Are you scared?”

“A little,” you replied tersely. You didn’t want to look silly in front of him, plus it was a rather childish fear. “The storms, the thunder, and all that… they startle me. That’s all.”

“Did you know it's called astraphobia? The irrational fear of thunder, lightning, and storms in general,” he began to ramble. “It’s a fairly common phobia that can cause intense anxiety or even panic when people experience a storm, particularly electrical ones.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“But you shouldn’t be afraid; storms are part of the natural cycle of the Earth and help balance the atmosphere, providing water for plants and refreshing the air. Although lightning may seem dangerous, it’s very rare for it to strike a person since it generally falls on high points like trees or buildings. As for the sound of thunder, while loud, it can’t cause physical harm, as it’s just rapidly expanding air. Being at home is one of the safest places to be, as buildings are designed to withstand storms and safely discharge lightning energy…”

“Honey,” you interrupted him. Your hands went up to his neck. “You don’t have to fix it with science. Sometimes, I just want to hear that everything will be okay.”

The man felt embarrassed for rambling on about it, but to make up for it, he leaned down to give you a soft kiss.

“Everything is fine, baby. I’ll be with you.”

Another thunderclap resonated, and even though you felt uncomfortable, being with him made it more bearable.

“What would I do without my handsome, strong, and protective man?”

“Are you talking about me? Or are you cheating on me with someone else?”

You rolled your eyes at his joke and tried to walk away, but he pulled you back to ask for a kiss. You didn’t resist, of course.

“I made hot chocolate. Do you want a cup?”

“Uh-huh. Let me get dressed, and I’ll be with you in a moment.”

You went to the kitchen to meticulously prepare a couple of cups with the drink and made sure to include marshmallows, as he liked. Additionally, you added pumpkin spice that you had specifically bought for his visits, knowing it was one of his favorite flavors of autumn.

When Spencer came out, dressed in pajamas that looked too comfortable and warm, you felt happy watching him. You had already placed his cup on the desk where he would be setting up, where several files and notebooks were already resting.

He thanked you with a kiss on the forehead and took a seat, not daring to lie on the couch next to you because he knew he wouldn’t get up again after that.

“Do you need help with anything?” you offered, even if you knew it was probably work too complex for you to do.

“No, it’s not necessary. But if you want, you can stay and keep me company while I work. I’d feel much better,” he replied.

You hummed in agreement and settled back into the armchair, beginning to sip from your cup while keeping the TV off, knowing that Spencer was bothered by noise when he was working. You felt a bit like an intruder in his workspace, but the idea of having him close calmed you.

As Spencer reviewed the printed files, you decided to watch him. His expression was one of concentration, with his brow slightly furrowed and his jaw clenched. It was evident that he was absorbed in his world of research, perhaps analyzing a recent case or reviewing the reports he had received.

You remained silent for quite some time until your curiosity grew, and you dared to ask:

“Is it a lot of work?”

“Kind of. I need to check a couple of details before sending a summary to the office,” he replied without taking his eyes off the paper. The familiarity in his voice gave you a sense of connection, even though you weren’t directly interacting.

“Difficult case?”

“A bit. There are many variables involved. I’m trying to break down the information to make it easier to understand. Sometimes work can be a puzzle,” he said, and although he seemed immersed in his task, there was a tone of passion in his voice that made you admire him even more.

That said, you decided not to interrupt him while he continued working. In his world, he could be a bit more reserved, and while you wanted to know more, you also understood that he needed his space.

As time passed, the rain continued to hit the windows, creating an enveloping atmosphere. Spencer seemed completely absorbed in his task, and at some point, he looked up at you and smiled, albeit briefly, before returning to his concentration. It was a simple gesture, but it made you feel included in his world, even though he was focused on something else.

“You know? I’m glad I came here,” Spencer suddenly said, breaking the calm. “I mean, not just because of the electricity, but sometimes work can be exhausting, and… I know, I feel overwhelmed, like I have a million things on my mind. But when I’m with you, I feel like I can set all that aside. It’s like your presence gives me a breather.”

You looked into his eyes, searching for that sincerity that had always captivated you. It was a vulnerable moment, and you felt grateful for his trust. Without saying anything, you got up and went to him to sit on his lap, letting him wrap his arm around your waist.

You both remained silent for a moment, feeling the weight of the night and each other’s closeness. But it was also evident that the day had been long for him. You noticed the tension in his body manifesting in his posture (despite having showered), as his shoulders were slumped, and his gaze, though still bright, showed signs of fatigue.

“You're not done yet?” you asked softly, running your hands through his still slightly damp hair. You had bought him a conditioner that smelled delightful and gave a silky feel.

“I did. I just need to sign off on the file to submit it at the office tomorrow.”

The vulnerability in his voice resonated with you.

“Do you want us to go to bed then?” you suggested, even though you felt there was more you could share.

Your boyfriend nodded with his eyes closed, a clear sign of exhaustion, and you promised him you’d be with him as soon as you finished tidying up in the kitchen. Spencer organized the desk, and once everything was ready, both of you headed to the bedroom. It was a cozy space, with the lights off, and the sound of the storm could be heard through the window. You got into bed, and he quickly joined you.

When he wrapped his arms around you from behind, the warmth of his body enveloped you and you felt all the tension you had built up during the storm melt away. You nestled against him, enjoying the sensation of his closeness.

“I like being here with you,” he murmured as he wrapped his arm around you. Spencer took a moment to breathe deeply, as if he were grateful for the small moment you had “I always have trouble falling asleep, but with you in my arms, it’s not so difficult"

The sincerity of your boyfriend moved you, and you felt him place a soft kiss on your shoulder, to which you responded by leaning closer to him.

You both stayed silent for a while, listening to the sound of the rain beginning to diminish. The tranquility of the night was like a blanket wrapping around you.

Finally, as the heaviness of sleep started to assail you, you felt the weight of the day fade away.

“Goodnight, Spencer,” you said in a whisper, feeling the peace his presence brought you. “Love you.”

“Love you more,” he replied.

And as his eyes closed, you realized that despite the storms raging outside, there was a place where you both felt safe and comfortable.

[blissfullyecho]

Advice for having a fresh start in life? Your advice is always spot on and I'm definitely getting your book and templates.

How to Reset Your Life & Have a Fresh Start

A fresh start doesn’t come from some “motivational” quote you read on Instagram. It doesn’t come from “clearing your mind” or waiting for the perfect time. A fresh start is for the people who realize one very simple truth: everything you want is already within your reach, you just have to stop making excuses and claim it.

Here’s the deal: You don’t need a “fresh start” in the way most people think. That’s just their way of trying to press reset because they’re too scared to be ruthless with their own potential. What you need is a transformation, and that’s something no one else can give you. If you’re looking for a fresh start, stop playing small and start living like the person you want to become today.

Rule #1:

Stop waiting for life to give you a break. No one owes you anything, and the world isn’t just going to hand you what you want. If you want a fresh start, you need to take it. You need to be so unstoppable that the world literally can’t ignore you. You want a fresh start? Create it by burning the old version of yourself to the ground. Forget the person you were last week or last year. That person doesn’t exist anymore, and you’re about to be something completely different.

Rule #2:

Cut the dead weight. People, habits, places—anything that doesn’t elevate you, cut it out. You can’t have a fresh start while carrying around the old junk that’s weighing you down. That means saying goodbye to anyone who doesn’t bring you closer to your goals. Your energy should only be spent on things and people that reflect your highest potential. If they don’t add value, they’re a distraction—and distractions don’t deserve a seat at the table.

Rule #3:

Get comfortable with discomfort. Growth doesn’t happen in your comfort zone, and if you think a fresh start is going to be all rainbows and sunshine, you’re already sabotaging yourself. It’s going to be uncomfortable, it’s going to test you, and it’s going to push you to your limits. But guess what? That’s exactly what it takes to be successful. Embrace the grind. Embrace the hustle. You want change? Work for it like your life depends on it—because it does.

Rule #4:

Never, ever apologize for your ambition. A fresh start doesn’t mean getting humble—it means owning your power. Stop being shy about what you want. Stop waiting for validation from people who will never understand your vision. You’re not here to play nice or make people feel comfortable. You’re here to dominate.

Rule #5:

Set a standard for your life that’s so high, most people will think you’re delusional. But here’s the kicker: the higher your standards, the faster you’ll get there. I didn’t get to where I am by settling for less than what I deserve. If you’re not aiming for the top, then what are you even doing? The only fresh start that matters is the one where you don’t settle, you don’t back down, and you don’t stop until the world is at your feet.

Rule #6:

Become obsessed with your vision. Most people try to balance their lives, but if you want a fresh start, you need to be all in. No more distractions. No more “maybe next time” or “I’ll try again.” You’re in this to win, and you’re going to make it happen. A fresh start is about becoming relentless in your pursuit of your goals. You don’t give up. You don’t wait. You just make it happen.

A fresh start isn���t a cute reset—it’s a complete reinvention. It’s shedding everything you thought you were and stepping into the person you were always meant to be. You don’t need permission. You don’t need a new year or a new month. You need to look in the mirror, decide you’re done with who you were, and step into your future now.

Now go out there and remind the world why you’re the one they should be watching.

[knottedhearts]

Argument: M.S

Summary: You and Matt are arguing because he's being awfully loud, and you're on your period.

The evening had started off fine. You’d both been sitting in the living room, enjoying a quiet night in. But that peace quickly shattered as Matt’s loud voice carried through the room like a sledgehammer. He’d been talking non-stop about some random topic, laughing at his own jokes and rambling without noticing how overwhelming it was. You were curled up on the couch, trying to get comfortable despite the aching cramps that came with your period. You wanted nothing more than to curl up and zone out to a movie or even just close your eyes for a few minutes of silence.

But Matt’s energy was impossible to ignore. His laughter echoed off the walls, and his voice cut through the air with each sentence. It didn’t matter how much you tried to focus on the TV screen or ignore the noise—it felt like his presence was all-consuming, drowning you in sound.

You shifted uncomfortably on the couch, your lower back aching, your abdomen throbbing. Every movement made the cramps feel worse, and the constant noise made it harder to focus on anything but the pain.

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. You turned to him, your voice tight with frustration. "Matt, can you keep it down?"

Matt didn’t seem to hear you at first, his energy undeterred by your quiet request. He was too caught up in his own story, too wrapped up in whatever had him so animated. "No, seriously, man, I’m telling you," he laughed loudly, his voice rising as he explained some ridiculous anecdote.

You clenched your jaw, trying to keep your cool. "Matt," you said again, this time louder, but with an edge to it. "I’m not feeling good. I’m on my period, and I have cramps. Can you just… lower your voice a little?"

Matt paused mid-sentence, finally catching your tone, but he didn’t seem to understand the seriousness of it. He shrugged, not noticing how you were holding your stomach, trying to soothe the pain. "What’s the big deal? I’m just talking."

You stared at him, the irritation bubbling up like a volcano. "The big deal, Matt, is that I’m literally cramping in pain, and you’re yelling like you’re hosting a damn podcast! Can you show a little consideration?"

He frowned, clearly taken aback. "It’s not like I’m yelling at you. I’m just talking loud because that’s how I talk, alright? You’re the one overreacting."

You could feel the frustration rising, the way the tension in your body was making everything worse. It was hard enough dealing with your physical pain, but now Matt was being dismissive of your need for quiet.

"Overreacting?" you scoffed, shaking your head. "Matt, I’m literally sitting here in pain, trying to get through this, and all you can do is talk at full volume like it’s a damn comedy show. It’s not about how you talk—it's about you being completely unaware of how you're affecting everyone else in the room!"

Matt’s expression turned defensive, his eyes narrowing. "You seriously want me to apologize for how I talk?" His tone was rising now, getting sharp. "I’m not gonna start whispering just because you’re uncomfortable. That’s not my fault."

You felt your jaw tighten, your hands balling into fists. "It’s not about whispering, Matt! It’s about being mindful of the people around you! You never think about how your loud, obnoxious voice affects others. It’s like you don’t even care!"

Matt didn’t back down. "I care! I’m not trying to piss you off. I’m just being me, alright?"

"Being you?" You could feel your patience snapping, the frustration boiling over. "Being you isn’t the problem, Matt. The problem is that you can’t be bothered to understand that people need quiet sometimes, and right now, I need some damn quiet!"

The words hit him harder than you expected. He took a step back, his eyes flashing with irritation. "You think I don’t understand? You think I don’t know you’re having a rough time? But that doesn’t mean I have to change everything about me just to suit you!"

You stood up then, pacing for a moment, the cramps flaring up as you moved, but the anger took over. "I’m not asking you to change yourself, Matt, I’m asking you to be aware of other people’s needs for once. Is that too much to ask?"

"Yeah, it’s too much!" Matt shot back, his voice louder than ever. "I’m not gonna sit here and apologize for talking! Just because you’re dealing with something doesn’t mean I have to tiptoe around you like you’re fragile!"

You felt the tension in the room growing thicker, your chest tightening with frustration. "I’m not fragile, Matt," you said, your voice wavering with a mix of anger and exhaustion. "I just need some goddamn peace. Can you give me that?"

But Matt wasn’t backing down. His voice was cold now, defensive, as though he couldn’t understand why this was such a big deal. "You think I’m just gonna stop being myself because you’re having a bad day? That’s not how it works."

The words felt like a slap, and you finally snapped. "You know what, Matt? Maybe you should just leave me the hell alone!" You threw your hands up in frustration, the weight of the argument crashing down on you.

Matt’s face reddened with anger, his hands clenched into fists. "Fine! You want me to leave you alone? Maybe you should just deal with it yourself, then!"

His words stung, and before you could even react, you spun on your heel and started walking away. "Where are you going?" Matt called after you, but you didn’t stop, walking straight toward the door.

You grabbed your jacket, throwing it on as you walked out of the room, trying to push away the wave of frustration that threatened to overwhelm you. "I need space," you muttered under your breath. You didn’t even know where you were going at first, just wanting to escape, to get away from the noise and the tension.

"Wait," Matt said, his voice softer now, but you didn’t turn around. "I didn’t mean it like that," he called after you, but you kept walking, your heart pounding in your chest.

You didn’t want to hear apologies right then, not after everything that had been said. You just needed a moment alone, away from the noise, away from the confrontation. You didn’t know when or how the two of you would work through this, but right now, all you could focus on was finding some peace.

You didn't know how long you'd need, but you were sure of one thing—until Matt could truly understand the importance of being considerate, the fighting, the noise, and the misunderstandings weren’t going to stop.

[dee-writes-anime]

Can i request something hawks x really introverted reader, so very different from him. you can choose everything else, just how he would menage things if you were dating

The "A" Team

FEATURING Keigo 'Hawks' Takami x Reader

SUMMARY You join Hawks at a hero charity event.

CONTENT WARNINGS introverted reader, soft hawks, hero event, cutesy fluff :)

AUTHORS NOTE Another introverted reader request done! I got this pretty close to the first one and I have a feeling the anon might be the same person thinking I didn't get their ask, but either way, I hope you like it, anon! <3

You weren't sure how you ended up agreeing to this. It was supposed to be a quiet night in—a rare chance for you and Keigo to unwind without the noise of the outside world. Yet here you were, standing in front of your mirror, smoothing the fabric of your dress, already feeling the beginnings of anxiety twist in your stomach.

Keigo, Hawks, your boyfriend of the past year, was waiting in the living room. He had convinced you, ever so gently, to join him at an important hero-related event—a charity gala organized by the Hero Commission. It was the type of high-profile gathering that drew media attention, pro-heroes from all over the country, and, worst of all, crowds.

But Keigo had a way of making you feel like you could handle anything, even when it pushed you far beyond your comfort zone. His energy, his boundless enthusiasm—it was contagious, sometimes too much for you, but it was also a warmth you couldn’t help but love. And now, you were preparing to step into his world, just for a night.

“You ready, dove?” His voice broke the quiet of the room as he peeked around the corner, his golden eyes sparkling with excitement. He looked impossibly good in his fitted suit, his wings tucked behind him, perfectly styled for the event.

You took a deep breath and nodded, though your fingers fidgeted nervously with the hem of your dress. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

He noticed the tension immediately, crossing the room in a few quick strides. “Hey, don’t worry. We’ll be in and out, alright? I know it’s not your scene, but I’ll stick with you the whole time. We’re a team.”

You smiled softly, the reassurance in his voice easing some of your nerves. You appreciated how he never pushed too hard, always offering you an out if you needed it. Keigo was all about the spotlight, but with you, he was patient. It was one of the many things you loved about him.

The venue was even grander than you had imagined. Crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling, casting a warm glow over the crowd of finely dressed heroes and socialites. A soft hum of conversation filled the room, punctuated by the occasional burst of laughter or the flash of a camera. Your heart raced as you stepped inside, Keigo's arm looped protectively around your waist, his presence grounding you amidst the unfamiliar chaos.

"Just stick close, dove," he murmured into your ear, sensing the way your body tensed under the weight of the atmosphere. His voice was low, comforting. "You're doing great."

You managed a nod, gripping his arm a little tighter. This world of glitz and glamour, of flashing lights and constant attention, was so far removed from the quiet existence you preferred. But Keigo made it bearable. He always knew when to push and when to pull back.

As the two of you made your way further into the room, you could feel the eyes of the crowd turning in your direction. Not because of you, of course, but because of him. Hawks was one of the most famous pro-heroes in the country, and wherever he went, people followed. You had grown used to it by now—the way people gravitated toward him, as if drawn by some invisible force.

"Keigo!" A voice called out, and you turned to see a group of heroes approaching, all smiles and eager handshakes. Hawks greeted them with his usual charm, his wings fluttering slightly as he chatted with them, but you stayed silent at his side, offering a polite smile when they glanced your way. It was always like this at events—Keigo was the star, and you were the quiet shadow, content to let him shine.

But tonight, the spotlight felt a little too bright.

"Keigo, who's this lovely lady?" One of the heroes asked, a playful grin on his face. "Don't tell me you've been keeping her a secret!"

You stiffened slightly, feeling the weight of their attention shift toward you. Social interactions had never been your strong suit, and being at the center of it—even for a brief moment—sent a wave of anxiety washing over you.

Keigo, ever perceptive, sensed your discomfort immediately. His arm tightened around you slightly, pulling you closer into his side. "This is my girlfriend," he said smoothly, his voice full of pride but gentle, as if offering you a buffer from the sudden attention. "She’s not really one for the limelight, but she’s the one who keeps me grounded."

Your heart swelled at his words, though the tension in your chest remained. You gave the heroes another small, polite smile, praying the conversation would move on quickly.

And it did—thanks to Keigo. He had this effortless way of steering conversations, of drawing attention away from you whenever he sensed you were uncomfortable. It was one of the many ways he protected you in situations like these, never letting the pressure grow too much.

The evening wore on, with more introductions, more conversations, and more small talk. You managed to keep up, though each interaction drained you a little more. The noise, the crowds, the constant buzzing energy—it all felt so overwhelming.

At one point, you found yourself standing by the bar, Keigo chatting with a few other pro-heroes nearby. Your gaze drifted around the room, watching as the party swirled around you, feeling more and more like an outsider in this glittering world.

“You alright, dove?” Keigo’s voice pulled you from your thoughts. He was suddenly beside you, his golden eyes filled with concern as he reached out to brush a strand of hair from your face. “You’re looking a little pale.”

“I’m fine,” you replied softly, though your voice betrayed the exhaustion you were starting to feel. “Just…a little overwhelmed.”

Keigo frowned, his hand slipping down to take yours, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “You wanna head out? I’ve made my rounds, kissed enough babies for one night.”

You hesitated, torn between wanting to escape the suffocating atmosphere and not wanting to drag him away from an event that was clearly important for his career.

“I don’t want to ruin your night,” you said quietly.

“Ruin it?” He chuckled, shaking his head. “Dove, you being here with me makes my night. And if you’re not comfortable, we leave. Simple as that.”

You stared at him for a moment, feeling a rush of gratitude and love for the man standing before you. He had such a big heart, always looking out for you, even in situations where he was the one who should be the focus.

“Okay,” you agreed softly, giving his hand a gentle squeeze in return. “Let’s go.”

The two of you left the gala not long after, slipping out into the cool night air. The noise of the event faded behind you, replaced by the soft rustling of leaves in the nearby trees and the distant sounds of the city. Keigo led you down a quiet street, his arm wrapped around your shoulders as he held you close.

“See?” he said with a grin, glancing down at you. “Told you we’d be in and out.”

You smiled up at him, feeling the last of your tension melt away in the peaceful quiet. “You’re right. Thanks for…you know, understanding.”

“Hey, it’s what I do,” he said lightly, though there was a depth of sincerity in his eyes. “I know I can be a bit…much sometimes. But I want you to know that you’re my priority. If you’re not comfortable, I’m not comfortable.”

You leaned into him, resting your head against his shoulder. “You’re not too much,” you murmured. “You’re just…you. And I love that about you.”

He smiled, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. “I love you too, dove.”

As the two of you walked through the quiet night, away from the noise and the crowds, you realized that this was what mattered most. Not the flashy events or the public appearances, but the quiet moments you shared, just the two of you. Keigo might be a hero to the world, but to you, he was simply the man who made you feel safe, no matter how overwhelming the world around you became.

And that was more than enough.

[anemoiashifts]

2025 shifting & general pick an object reading.

────୨ৎ────

regarding those of you who are seeing this on tiktok, this will possibly be one of my last posts / readings on this account considering tiktok is going away in my country on the nineteenth of january. tiktok won’t just go poof overnight so ill still be active for a little while in the form of replying to comments / interacting. i can’t say with certainty that you’ll see any posts from me anymore. i do have some drafted, but no promises that they’ll be completed in time. so, thank you thank you thank you for the support ive received over the past year & a half. this platform is a privilege that i am forever grateful for. im so grateful to be entrusted with a sliver of your shifting journey — something so sacred & personal — & i only wish all of you (tiktok or tumblr) success. i will always be your digital cheerleader to anyone who may need one, even if you don’t see me. i hold this part of my life close to my heart & want to restate how grateful i am. again, thank you. goodbye. this is going yo be really embarrassing if tiktok doesn’t go away but i still stand by it whatever the outcome may be.

i do have a instagram, tumblr & youtube all by the same name if you’d like to continue to see shifting content from me.

disclaimer !! if someone doesn’t resonate, please please don’t change yourself or alter yourself to fit a description. i do tons of shifting readings — at the top of every month — & you’ll have another shot at finding something that resonates. ✧˖°.

hope everyone is having a nice first day of the new year ! this reading is a little different from my others considering i laid it out differently then my others. maybe ill keep it ? maybe i won’t ? tell me what you think please. okay ! here’s the reading :)

ring. 𖢻

— welcome ring people !

ferris wheel, velvet curtains, cracked cd / jewel cases, a house in nebraska by ethel cain.

❥ self & shifting.

i will briefly allude to this below & maybe it will provide some more content, but you seem to be shifting out of hate for this reality then anything else. maybe it’s not even complete total hatred, but when you are stressed or going through a tough situation you often find yourself saying “I want to shift”. you may be experiencing a lack of motivation for anything at the moment & i do see that improving if the first few steps to achieve your goals are taken. if you struggle to put moisturizer on before bed, leave some on your beside table. in subtle ways this year, you can start to find that “spark” again if you put your mind to it. the second half of twenty twenty five will be where you start to see progress, if you put in the hard work. let yourself see parts of yourself that you previously hid away from yourself, even if uncomfortable.

❥ difficulties.

you want to change, but don’t know where to start. you’ve gotten yourself in a hole far to deep to climb out of, you tell yourself. there’s this nagging voice in your head that keeps dragging you back into your comfort zone. while you are acknowledging that this isn’t the way you’d like to live anymore, this mental place feels like all you know. you could struggle with chronic pessimism / negative thinking patterns & don’t believe that you are capable of achieving possible goals you’ve thought about setting for yourself. but you’re wrong & you are. you cling so desperately to what you feel is a little bit of hope that you can turn things around & you more then can. please be mindful of your thoughts & give yourself some grace. it may seem easier to continue like this, but does it do more harm then good ?

flowers. ❀

— hello flower pile.

peppermint ice cream, black door knobs, the personality type istp, water sign energy.

❥ self & shifting.

as you step into the new year, you may notice your opinions are changing. it could be as simple as preferring silver jewelry over a lifetime of being committed to only wearing gold. in different case, it could be related to your desired reality. maybe you’ve been a walking dead shifters for five years & you’ve fallen out of love with it. now, you’ve discovered narnia & are fully committed to it & no longer feel a connection with your hypothetical walking dead dr. & that’s okay ! there will be a lot of changes for you this upcoming year & embrace them. not all changes are bad & scary & will lead you to bigger & better things. allow yourself to not be bound to one idea too tightly.

❥ difficulties.

you may be someone who doesn’t have a lot of friends but craves community even if the thought terrifies you. you’re used to being alone & independent, i get it. you’re allowed to ask for help & will need to at some point. you can’t do everything all by yourself. yes, you may struggle to communicate with others & are feared of being judged but your voice is important. you’re someone who isn’t follower & embraces that you’re someone who is different from others. that’s something not everyone can do. you should be proud that you have that strength to not give into various pressures ! i promise, you’ll find your people. you may just not be looking in the right place. no more of watching life from the sidelines. you deserve better then that. your sensitivity is not a weakness but a strength.

butterfly. 𐦍

— happy new year butterfly pile.

paper airplanes, witchy style brooms, lemonade, april 20th.

❥ self & shifting.

you’re going to be so successful this year. like wow. im picking up on financial successes specifically, but really its in all forms of successes. perhaps a new job or some sort of inheritance ? or you could maybe be shifting to a place with money involved like a fame or nepo baby dr ?

whatever the case may be, your goals will be met. i could see you wanting to get more into healing work. going (back) to therapy or learning to become more aware of what is the source of your emotions when in high stress situations. also being more in control of your emotions. you could find yourself getting more into meditation or even something like yoga, maybe.

❥ difficulties.

you do have some growing up to do. you hold a very hyper independent, mature side & at the same time there’s a very child-like aspect to you. that itself isn’t an a bad thing but you find yourself constantly feeling behind your peers due to how childish (in terms of interests & lack of experiences) you think you are. you feel unaccomplished, pathetic even. you have a mindset of “i am great or nothing at all”. which isn’t true. despite flickers & bursts of motivation, you often give up on projects half way through because you don’t think they can compare to the people around you. the hardest part will be picking yourself back up & pushing past those thoughts despite wanting to give up. you are not behind. perhaps your parents could’ve sheltered you a little too much, but know everyone moves at a different pace.

[babyleostuff]

HIP HOP UNIT WITH A TALL S/O

i’m 5’7 and even though i’m not like the tallest, i’ve always been insecure about my height, especially when it comes to men (because we know the majority likes shorter girls) (this is no hate to my short queens), so this i very much self indulgent. ily my tall girlies <333

warning: mention of size kink with mingyu (it's only mentioned, i didn't elaborate or anything)

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ CHOI SEUNGCHEOL 

at first i think cheol would be a bit sulky, because he’d want to be the taller a bigger one in the relationship (honey, you could still manhandle all of us, no matter the height). but that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t go for someone taller. after some time he’d actually find it so hot that you can be so independent because of your height, like - you don’t need help from anyone else to reach the top shelf, you can do it all by yourself (he’s always like “that’s my girl” and has heart eyes whenever situations like those happen). also, because you’re taller you don’t get intimidated that easily, and you can actually use your height to your advantage and intimidate other people (also hot in his opinion) (he’s a leo after all) (i’ll never shut up about him being a leo).  

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ JEON WONWOO 

same as cheol, i think wonwoo dating a taller girl would be kind of? out of his comfort zone (at first). but even before you began dating, the more time you spent with each other, he began to find your height more and more attractive, to the point where when you actually began dating he wouldn’t pay much attention to it anymore. if he’d notice that you got insecure or someone pointed out you’re small (or non-existent) height difference he’d get so protective of you and reassure you he didn’t mind it at all. omfg and whenever you’d kiss his forehead because you were tall enough to do it, he’d turn into mush and it would make him so so happy, loved and appreciated. and even though you were tall, he was still bigger (and wider) (damn those 58cm shoulders). 

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ KIM MINGYU 

god made men and sent mingyu as an apology. he would love to have a s/o on the taller side, he said it himself - he likes tall girls, and he totally gives me vibes of someone who’d be in a relationship with a tall person. he wouldn’t have to deal with the neck and back cramps, but he could still be the bigger one in the relationship (he’d still get to tease you that you’re small and all) (do i have to mention that a size kink for tall girlies with mingyu would still be possible because he’s so much bigger than you???). he’d love to show you off, especially when you’d be wearing heels (that man would go feral over you in a dress and high heels). you’d be the tall couple in your friend group and omg that’s so hot. also, if anyone ever dared to make you insecure because of your height they’d have to deal with a very angry mingyu.

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ CHWE VERNON  vernon would find it so cool, like “look at my girl, yeah that’s my tall queen.” vernon never found it weird that you were his height or taller, it’d be one of his favourite features of yours, and he would make sure to remind you that he loved your height if you ever got insecure because of it. and as much as vernon was passive about people calling out his insecurities or making fun of him (he doesn’t have the energy to focus on such people) he’d always stand up for you if anyone ever commented on your height. he would love to take mirror pictures with you, he’d definitely set one as his wallpaper (he generally would go feral over seeing you two in pictures, because he genuinely found your height difference hot).

taglist (if you want to be added, check my masterlist): @weird-bookworm @sea-moon-star @hanniehaee @wonwooz1 @byprettymar @edgaralienpoe @staranghae @eightlightstar @itza-meee @immabecreepin @hyneyedfiz @honestlydopetree @dkswife @marisblogg @whatsgyud @aaniag @jeonghansshitester @daegutowns @carlesscat-thinklogic23 @embrace-themagic @soul-is-a-strange-kid @ohmyhuenings @nidda13 @hrts4hanniehae @k-drama-adict @f4iryjjosh @isabellah29 @bangantokch @hafsah-ali

[atinyniki]

instant ramen

group: stray kids !

pairing: idol!lee felix x f!reader

genre: angst with a happy ending

warnings + additional info: reader is referred to as y/n, established relationships, mentions of periods and hormonal imbalances, felix is a little mean, felix is referred to as lix, lixie, and felix.

authors note: i was bored and made a short little felix drabble ! this is also not proofread, i just had a thought and felt like posting it. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)

wc: 1483

(pt. 2) || (pt. 3)

it’s not everyday that felix comes home in a bad mood. he’s had just about the worst day at practice today. he couldn’t seem to be getting anything right, and often found himself zoning out and getting off track. 

you’ve had a long day too. you couldn’t seem to get out of bed this morning, and woke up in the late hours of the afternoon. your entire house was a mess, and you didn’t have the energy to clean it up. to make matters worse, your period is late and it’s left you grumpy the entire week.

it’s now almost midnight, and you’re sprawled out on the couch comfortably, watching some tv. you have felix’s fuzzy blanket over you, one you both always use when watching shows together. 

suddenly, you hear the familiar sound of the keys jingling at the door. the door flies open, and behind it, you see a tired felix, dark green hoodie shrouding his face. 

you slowly get up from the couch and turn off the tv, careful not to trip over anything while you make your way to the door. 

“why are you up so late y/n?”, his voice was low, tired, but he managed to muster a small smile.

“it’s not that late, i just wanted to wait for you.”

he slowly walked into the home, setting his bag down at the door. he made his way to the kitchen, grabbing some water to drink, when his eyes quickly dart to the dishes.

felix likes having the house clean. after living in a dorm with chaotic men who didn’t know how to clean up after themselves, it got pretty sickening. normally the house would be clean, but felix has been out recently due to his new comeback, and you’ve been busy with work. neither of you had the time to do simple tasks anymore.

seeing the dishes still dirty frustrated felix more, but he decided not to mention it and walked to the bathroom to take a quick shower. he passed by the living room, the cushions scattered messily on the floor, and then your shared bedroom. clothes had piled up in the two hampers you had, some had even fallen onto the floor.

some part in felix just snapped. 

“is it really that hard to put some clothes in the wash, y/n?”

you were zoned out, but his voice brought you back to reality. 

“sorry what did you say? i zoned-“

“nevermind…”

felix began to walk away, but you walked towards him, stopping him. 

“lix what’s wrong?”, you looked at him, your eyes full of concern. he let out a scoff, “what’s wrong? what’s wrong is that you’ve been home the entire day and the house is still a mess.” 

your eyes widen. normally, felix is understanding about these things. you only have one day off the entire week. you’ve been overworking yourself so much recently that you just needed today to be a break. 

“i’m really sorry lix, i’ll just do it tomorrow” 

he glares at you, a foreign look swirling in his eyes. “if you were really sorry, you would have cleaned up after yourself. you know i don’t have time for this. it would only take thirty minutes max to fix up the house a little.”

“you really need to start doing something with yourself y/n. i’m not going to be doing everything while you just sit around and watch tv all day.”

you started tearing up. you didn’t mean to, but you really wanted to cry. felix saw the tears brimming in your eyes, and he started to feel a lump growing in his throat.

you didn’t know what else to say. you looked down and heard the receding footsteps, making your way to your bedroom. the tears slowly fell from your eyes, but you didn’t dare to make a sound. your boyfriend had never spoken to you like that, and he never really got that cold.

you picked up the clothes off the floor, putting them into the hampers and making your way to the laundry room. you put them in the wash and put the hampers back in your room.

you walked to the kitchen, and started to clean the dishes. you wanted to get it done as soon as possible, so felix could have a bit of relief when he got out of the shower. his words continued to replay in your head. you’ve been so exhausted recently, you felt bad that you couldn’t do anything for him.

you put the dishes back into their respective cabinets, and figured that felix would probably be hungry when he got out. you pulled out his favorite instant ramen, put it in the pot, and began making it for him. you hoped it would cheer him up. 

meanwhile, felix stays in the shower for longer than usual. he takes up the first eight minutes alone just standing in the warm stream, washing all the impurities off of his body. he stayed there for as long as he could, but for some reason, the guilt wouldn’t wash away with him.

he knew he shouldn’t have been so harsh. he didn’t mean to, he was just exhausted and already a little put off, but that’s no excuse to lash out at your girlfriend like that. after a while, he finally grabbed his shampoo, staring at the bottle for a moment before placing it back on the rack.

he reached down to grab your shampoo instead, the vanilla scent calming him down instantly. in a way, he felt closer to you. the foamy bubbles ran down his hair, and he began to wash the soap out of his hair. 

he then took another one of your items, your vanilla body wash. he liked that you’d always use vanilla scented items, it was easy to associate the smell with you. suddenly, the whole bathroom smelled like vanilla, smelled like you.

felix found the smell so comforting, almost like you were right there with him. he closed his eyes, thinking about what he said to you. he knew that as soon as he got out, he’d apologize to you. 

he finally got out of the shower and put some comfortable clothes on. it was almost two in the morning now, so he was expecting you to be asleep. he figured he’d apologize to you tomorrow when you wake up. 

he makes his way to the bedroom, but to his surprise you aren’t there. he didn’t go looking for you, he figured you needed some space. he saw your keys on your dresser, so he knew you hadn’t left the house. 

all of a sudden, he sees you at the door, a wooden rack in your hand with a bowl on top, decorated blue chopsticks on the side. you place it on his nightstand, and start playing with your thumbs, contemplating what to say next.

“i’m sorry for leaving the house a mess today, i know you didn’t want to come back home to that sight. i’ve cleaned it all up now though, and i made you some ramen. i figured you’d be hungry”, you let out a nervous chuckle. 

you looked up, and your heart immediately dropped to the pit of your stomach. you thought felix would be mad at you, but you didn’t expect him to cry.

he took your hand in his and let out a shaky breath. “i’m so sorry y/n. i truly didn’t mean what i said, i was just frustrated and seeing a messy house set me off a little bit. i promise it won’t happen again, please don’t overwork yourself just for my sake.”

you quickly wrapped him in a hug, “don’t cry lix, it’s okay. you’re just tired, i know you didn’t mean it”. you gave him a quick peck on his forehead, before running your fingers through his hair. 

he buried his head in your chest, inhaling the scent he’d been craving for the past hour, staining your his hoodie with his tears in the process.

“i love you lixie, im here for you. you don’t have to worry.”

he only clung onto you tighter after that, mumbling a little “i love you too” and multiple apologies into your chest. you smiled, knowing how vulnerable he was right now, and you were just happy he could trust you. 

“eat your ramen now, it’s getting cold dummy”

he looked up at you and smiled, patting the area next to him. you complied, lowering yourself onto the bed and clinging onto his arm.

the ramen had gone slightly cold, but it was still enjoyable. felix felt a familiar warmth spread throughout his entire being when you wrapped your arms around him, and let himself melt into your warmth. 

you have both been going through a lot recently, but you knew that as long as you had each other, you’d be okay.

<3

[jahayla-parker]

Made For : Finnick Odair x Reader

(Finnick Odair x Victor!Reader / Finnick Odair x Tribute!Reader / Finnick Odair x District4!Reader / Finnick Odair x Gf!Reader / Finnick Odair x fem!reader)

Descr: 5k wc, set to the time of What Was I Made For by Billie Eilish, Y/n finds herself questioning her worth and what she was made for when she finds herself in the same situation as her boyfriend Finnick Odair has been in since he won his games when his body began to be sold or given as gifts to those in the Capitol; Finnick seeks to help her through it. Hurt-Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Support, Healing, Etc.

Warnings: Hunger Games type warnings, mentions of Snow’s sex trafficking of victors (aka rape, but NOTHING explicit, everything post events), violence, trauma, bruising and injuries, crying, self-blame, and related. Please let me know if I missed anything!

I used to float, now I just fall down

I used to know but I'm not sure now

What I was made for

What was I made for?

Takin' a drive, I was an ideal

Looked so alive, turns out I'm not real

Just something you paid for

What was I made for?

Was this all there was? That seemed to be the case lately at least. To be fair, as a former victor, what else was there now? What was she made for outside of this? This had become not just a part of her life but her story, her identity. Was she really made for this? Could she be made for more? Would the Capitol even allow that?

These thoughts were on constant repeat in y/n’s head as she walked back to her house in the victor’s village. This was a routine occurrence as of late. So much so she actually debated if it made more sense to simply move to the Capitol rather than walking to the train and back every time she had a client to attend to. It would certainly save time and energy. But then again, her time was expendable and her energy was practically non existent by now. Besides, the train ride back to District 4 offered her solitude; something she had learned to equate to safety. The solitude that came with the train ride also provided her the chance to zone out, something she often resorted to after the events of the her visits to the Capitol. She also utilized the walk home from the train station as a way to try to compose herself before she returned to her boyfriend. Finnick knew what she was going through, far better than he should, given he was in the same position himself. But, that’s precisely why y/n wanted to make the most of the time they had together by not having to deal with the traumas imposed on them by Snow. She also needed the physical separation from the ever present carelessness and cruelty that was the literal foundation of the Capitol. Lastly, but by far the most important factor in her decision to not simply move to the Capitol, y/n wouldn’t live somewhere where Finnick wasn’t.

I'm sad again, don't tell my boyfriend

It's not what he's made for

What was I made for?

“Oh! Fin,” Y/n gasped, frantically wiping at her damp cheeks. Finnick had left a note saying he had some things to do in town, so she wasn’t expecting him home already. She hadn’t known he would be back from his errands so soon. If she had, she’d not have let herself break down this much.

Finnick frowned as he took in the state of his girlfriend. “Honey, what’s happened?” He asked, quickly making his way over to her. When she mumbled a quiet “nothing” in response, he sighed sympathetically. “Okay,” he nodded, cautiously taking y/n’s hands in his. “You don’t have to say anything honey, just know I’m here for you, okay?” He proposed, squeezing her hands as he scanned her tearful eyes.

“You’re allowed to cry,” Finnick commented lovingly when y/n seemed to whisper an apology before taking her hands back to resume drying her face.

“No,” y/n argued vaguely. She kept her eyes on the wood floor under her feet as she pulled the collar of her shirt up to dry her tears faster. He didn’t need to deal with this.

Finnick’s worried frown deepened. “Why not?”

“Because I should be used to this,” y/n answered, her tone laced with self-deprecating judgment.

Finnick’s chest caved in painfully as he came to understand what was troubling y/n. It wasn’t that he was truly surprised. While she was at the Capitol, he’d gone to the market to try to find some y/f/d for her for when she got home. It wasn’t much, but he was hoping it would help cheer her up slightly since he knew she’d unexpectedly had to leave two days in a row so far this week. He’d also been sure to tidy up and get some extra cozy blankets out of their closet for her. He had intended on being home by the time she got back, but the typical place he went to was out of y/f/d so he’d had tried to search for awhile. If he’d known y/n was already home, he’d have rushed back earlier.

As painful as it was to know what y/n was going through, and knowing he was powerless to stop it, this was almost worse. Finnick hated that she felt she had to become immune to the pain that came with having to attend to clients at the Capitol. She’d never expected him to do that, so why did she think she needed to? Finnick shook his head and took her hands in his once again, “no, you shouldn’t. This isn’t acceptable”.

Y/n mindlessly shrugged her shoulders. “I mean, if you ask Snow,” she commented, having actually done that herself not too long ago. “I.., this is what I was made for,” she concluded with a defeated sad smile.

Finnick felt his anger flare and he clenched his jaw to keep the tension in his face and not his hands that held y/n’s. “That’s such bullshi-”, he began but paused and sighed. His anger wasn’t going to help the situation, especially if there was a chance she might misinterpret it as being directed towards her. “Y/n,” he cooed in a much softer tone, “that’s not true”.

Y/n huffed lightly. She slowly lifted her gaze up from Finnick’s shoes until her eyes reached his troubled face. “Then what was I made for, Fin?” She asked timidly.

Finnick offered y/n a sad smile. He released one of her hands so he could use his now-free one to cup her cheek. “You were made to be you,” he said, his smile warmer now, “that’s all you ever have to be”.

“This is me,” y/n pointed out as she stared into Finnick’s attentive eyes.

Finnick’s brows scrunched together. “No”. He shook his head slowly. “This is something being forced upon you,” he reminded y/n delicately. “This is a chapter of your life, albeit a painful and traumatic one. But, you are not what is, or was, done to you”. When he noticed she was about to argue, he tapped her cheek tenderly. “Do you think this is who I am?” He asked, knowing full well despite them being in the same position, she was seeing herself through a much harsher lens than she would ever dare to see him.

Y/n rapidly shook her head worriedly. Of course that’s not what she meant! Seeing the way Finnick’s eyes and expression communicated the fact he already knew she didn’t see him that way calmed her. She slowly understood why he’d asked that question if he already knew her answer. He was right, it was ironic and hypocritical. But, she could see so many purposes Finnick had outside of this ordeal. The same couldn’t be said about herself.

Finnick silently gasped as he watched y/n close her eyes and begin to break down in tears. “Can I…” he trailed off, wanting to make sure he conveyed the message that it was her choice and he’d understand either way. “A-are you okay with me holding you right now?” Finnick questioned softly.

Finnick smiled faintly to himself when y/n gave him a silent nod in response. He made sure to give her enough time to change her mind if physical contact was understandably too much for her right now as he moved to he pull her to him. “Let it out love,” he encouraged, “you don’t need to keep this bottled up inside”. Finnick carefully let them to the couch, watching her to see if the action would be too triggering for her right now.

Y/n sat in silence in Finnick’s loving embrace for an unknown amount of time. Just listening to his whispered sweet nothings as she let his warm hands release her tension as he delicately rubbed her back. After a moment of contemplation, she leaned back to look up at her steadfast boyfriend. “How do you do it?” She asked quietly.

“What?” Finnick questioned, tilting his head down to see y/n more clearly.

“Live like this,” y/n explained. “I mean! I know you don’t have a choice either!” she corrected, cupping Finnick’s face apologetically. “But,” she sniffled. “You’re so much better at dealing with all of this,” y/n croaked.

Finnick pouted and sighed. That wasn’t something she should be trying to meet. He knew what she was seeking, the ability to get by without feeling the burden of all of this. But it shouldn’t be something anyone should have to seek. Much less something she should be ashamed for not having been able to do yet. “I’ve had a few extra years, honey,” Finnick reminded her solemnly.

Y/n smiled sadly and nodded minimally. “So,” she sniffled, tracing imaginary shapes on Finnick’s shirt. “I’ll get better at it?” She asked, her eyes moving up to meet his.

Finnick let out a long sigh. “I want to say no…” he admitted. “Because you shouldn’t have to. This shouldn’t be something you experience, let alone get used to.” He grit his teeth as he thought about the things he wished he could do to Snow for making y/n have to deal with any of this. “But, yeah…,” Finnick nodded sadly, “time will make it less noticeable. I’ll be here to help you with this too”.

Tears sprung into y/n’s still watery eyes again. She silently clung onto Finnick tightly. She knew her shaky sobs were making his shirt wet and was appreciative that he didn’t seem to be annoyed by it. “You know you don’t have to, right?” Y/n questioned in a hushed voice.

Finnick’s face furrowed slightly as he replayed y/n’s muffled voice, trying to see if “hearing” it a second time would allow him to understand what she’d said. Her face was buried in his chest, her lips pressed against the fabric of his shirt, making whatever she’d tried to say incomprehensible. “What’s that, darling?” Finnick asked tenderly as he brushed some of her hair away from her face.

Y/n slowly pulled herself off of Finnick’s chest in order to repeat herself. She needed him to hear her clearly. It was important that he knew this. “I want you to know that while I do appreciate everything, you don’t have to do all of this,” y/n told him breathily. “I know it’s a lot, and I’m needy, and I-“.

“Shhhh, honey,” Finnick whined, his face contorted with worry.

Y/n smiled faintly at her endearing boyfriend. “No it’s okay,” she promised, “I know I am, but I just…” She swallowed thickly and moved her arms away from Finnick’s torso, up to his face instead. “My worry isn’t about that. My worry is that I want to be sure that you know you don’t have to exert yourself to this extent.” Y/n once again offered him a tiny smile despite the turmoil in her mind. “You’re already going through a lot yourself, you don’t need to take me on as a burden too,” she assured him.

“You’re not a burden, my love,” Finnick argued with a soft shake of his head.

Y/n let out an airy half-laugh. “Regardless, Fin, I’m serious, you’d still be the best boyfriend, and the love of my life, without taking this on too. I need you to know that you don’t need to do this,” she explained fully.

Finnick smiled warmly as he continued to gaze down at y/n. “I do”. He leaned his head into her hand on his jaw. “I do know that, honey”.

“Good,” y/n breathed out in relief. “I don’t ever want to pressure you to do anything, even small, that-“ she began to ramble.

“I know,” Finnick nodded in understanding, his pointer finger trailing down her jaw. “I feel the same, angel,” he pointed out softly. “I want this. I want us. And, I want to be there for you, to lighten this darkness as much as I can for you since I can’t stop it.”

Y/n let out a choppy cry before she dove back into Finnick’s embrace. She held onto him tightly. “I love you so much, sweetheart,” she whimpered against his shoulder as her arms snaked around his back.

“I love you too, honey,” Finnick cooed, his own arms tight around y/n. “I love you too.” He closed his eyes and breathed in her familiarly comforting scent. “We’re going to get through this.”

'Cause I, 'cause I

I don't know how to feel

But I wanna try

I don't know how to feel

But someday I might

Someday I might

Y/n gasped as the bathroom door opened unexpectedly. She’d been staring at her bruises through the mirror for hours. Or so she suspected. She’d dissociated and lost track of time. As such, when the door opened, she had just been standing there alone in her and Finnick’s bathroom in only her bra and panties as she continued to take in her appearance.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” Finnick guiltily rushed out, stepping back into the hall and quickly pulling the door shut. “I didn’t know you were home, I’m sorry,” he whispered. His brows were scrunched as he tried to keep his anger at bay over having seen the marks on her body. Whoever her body had been sold to today hadn’t followed the contractual restrictions of not marking her up. The limitation was one of Snow’s rules for the acts one could commit against the victors he sold to the residents of the Capitol. It was not for the protection or sake of the victors themselves, but rather because it decreased their worth until the marks healed; Snow didn’t take discounts, meaning injuries risked a victor being out of commission for some time.

“‘s okay, Fin,” y/n whispered. She wiped the unshed tears from her eyes. She felt bad for the way her gasp made him feel like he was in the wrong for simply opening the door to his own bathroom. But, there was a more prevailing sense of blame that she felt right now regarding what he just experienced because of her. “Sorry, you didn’t need to see that… to see… me… like….” She rambled.

Finnick rested his head on his side of the closed bathroom door. “Honey, no, please don’t apologize,” he frowned. “Are you okay?” It was a stupid question, but he found himself needing to ask it nevertheless.

“Y-yeah,” y/n’s voice trembled through the door.

Finnick winced and pursed his lips. “Y/n,” he whispered knowingly.

“I can’t…. I…” y/n huffed. “It’s just…, I don’t know how to cover them,” she choked out. “Snow’s…. Snow is going to blame me”. Despite being on the other side of the door, her worry was evident in her tone.

Finnick squeezed his eyes shut. She shouldn’t be worried about this. She shouldn’t be dealing with any of this. She was meant for far more than this. “It’s not on you,” he reminded her gently.

“It was…,” y/n began, but paused, not wanting to burden Finnick by informing him of the name of her client. It was something they both often protected the other from. Since they would have to run into previous clients at mandatory Capitol parties, knowing who they were would only cause them to be constantly be mad at those specific attendees after knowing what they had been capable of doing to their unwilling partner. It was a morbid resolution, but one the couple had settled on in order to survive.

Y/n shook her head as she stared into the bathroom mirror. She watched herself as she poked at the bruising on her side. She flinched at pain and stifled a hiss. “He…,” she paused and took a deep breath, “he’s too close to Snow”. While she wouldn’t bother Finnick with who he was tonight, she knew her boyfriend was set on understanding why she was worried about being blamed for this when it was the one thing that usually fell on the clients. “It’ll be pinned on me for not having stopped him, that I should’ve-,” y/n sighed.

“That’s not your responsibility,” Finnick quickly pointed out. Y/n needed to know that. None of this was her fault nor responsibility. She was merely trying to survive. Something that shouldn’t be this difficult. “That’s not even something you are allowed to do, don’t let them trick you into blaming yourself by pretending that you suddenly had the privilege to stop him. None of this is by choice. None of this is your fault,” he reminded her. Taking a deep breath, he pressed his lips into a thin line. “Regardless of what you have to do or not do, none of this is your fault. No matter what you did or didn’t do, do or don’t do. Okay?” Finnick practically pleaded softly.

“Okay,” y/n agreed. She stood in silence as she stared at the purplish stains on her skin. “I don’t know what I’m going to do,” she confessed after another moment of contemplation.

Finnick bit his lip. “We’ll worry about that later,” he promised. “For now, do you need medical attention?” He asked worriedly. He’d only seen y/n’s injuries briefly before quickly shutting the door so she could regain some privacy.

Y/n chuckled darkly. “Like that would ever be an option,” she scoffed. The sold victors, even when covered in injuries despite their clients being told not to cause any, weren’t allowed to seek medical services or treatment. No matter how small or severe. It was clear Snow feared that the victors doing so would potentially expose the villainous was he was running a sex trade for the Capitol’s most prized residents. Not that anyone would likely do anything even if they did.

“It is,” Finnick corrected, his worry increasing as he wondered if y/n had gone without help for injuries before tonight. “We might not be able to go seek it out,” he acknowledged. “But, I’ve got a kit.” Finnick bit the inside of his cheek as he prepared to hear her answer to his next question. “Do you need anything?”

Y/n sniffled. “There’s nothing you can do for bruises,” she sighed.

Finnick’s fists balled at his side as he heard y/n’s shaky breathing and sniffling. “I… there’s a… a uhhh..” he rambled, his mind spinning. “A balm in the bottom drawer, to the left of the sink, it helps with pain,” he offered. He leaned against the doorframe, his ear pinned to the door as he waited to see if there was anything he could do for y/n.

After a few moments of silence, Finnick finally heard y/n’s small voice call out his name. His head perked up against the door. “Yeah, honey?” He asked. “I’m still here, what’s happening?”

“I, uhhh…” y/n frowned, burdened with guilt. “I’m sorry,” she sighed. “I can’t… I can’t reach it.”

“The balm?” Finnick questioned. He tried to visualize where it was and what severity or type of injuries might be preventing y/n from being able to reach it.

Y/n hesitated for a moment, uncertain how to answer without sounding weak and worrying Finnick further. “No, the… the handprint on my back,” she choked out.

Finnick winced, his fists clenching together and eyes screwing shut tightly. “Do you want some help?” He asked once he’d regained some of his composure.

“Do you mind?” Y/n whispered.

Finnick opened his eyes and frowned as he stepped back slightly from the door. “No, ‘course not, honey,” he promised. “Let me know when you’re okay with me coming in, alright?” Finnick instructed tenderly.

“Uhh yeah..,” y/n agreed slowly. She gazed at her exposed body in disgust. “How much… uhmmm. How much do you want me to cover up?”

“What do you mean, love?” Finnick wondered.

“I…,” y/n sighed. “How much should I cover up? Like… just leave my back exposed?” She asked as she eyed her discarded pile of tainted clothes in the corner of the bathroom.

Finnick frowned at y/n’s worry. “Whatever you’re comfortable with, love,” he advised gently. “As much as you need.” Finnick quickly tried to find a better response, knowing that a direct answer would help her since she was feeling sorta out of it right now. “If you prefer, I can blindly apply it to your back under your top,” he offered.

“Okay so you want me fully dressed?” Y/n asked rhetorically as her slow mind thought through her next steps. “One moment,” she agreed, turning to her pile of abandoned clothing.

Finnick’s brows furrowed. “It’s not about what I want, honey.” He sighed silently to himself. He hated how much she was worrying about him right now when she was the one needing help. “I just want you to be comfortable… as much as you can,” Finnick explained.

“So, I…” y/n began as she made her way back to the bathroom entrance. She cracked the door open lightly. She held it in place, forming just enough of an opening to stick only her head out of it, the edge of the door pressed into her neck. This way she wasn’t exposing Finnick to the sight of her injuries just yet. Y/n hesitantly looked up and met his patient eyes. “You’re okay with me not putting my shirt back on yet?” She clarified.

Finnick nodded, “I’m fine either way”. “This is about you, y/n”.

“Okay,” y/n said with a weak nod since her head was pinned. She offered Finnick a small smile, “thanks”. “‘Cause the fabric hurts right now,” y/n confessed.

“You don’t need to thank me,” Finnick reminded y/n lovingly.

Y/n pulled her head back in through the slightly opened door. “I know, it’s just, I know how ugly my body looks right now,” she explained as she slowly opened the door for Finnick.

“Hey, hey, don’t say that,” Finnick scolded softly. “You’re beautifully breathtaking, honey, always,” he promised. “Of course I don’t want to see you like this, but that’s not because it changes your beauty, only because I hate that you’re in pain, that someone hurt you,… I mean, I know it always hurts… I don’t like that either… I just meant.. right now with it being… more than…” he rambled.

Y/n nodded in understanding. She grabbed Finnick’s hand tightly. The warmth from his palm helped soothe her some. A shiver went through her as her body began to release some of the tension she was holding in.

Finnick stared intently into y/n’s eyes. “You’re in charge here, okay? You control where I look or touch, okay?”

When Finnick finished his scan of y/n’s body for any more injuries to attend to, he sighed with the tiniest bit of relief. “I promise you,” he said as he stood before her and took her hands in his. “I’m going to see to it that we find a way to make this end, to take our lives back, because you’re made for much more than to be used for Snow’s cruel plans”.

“We,” y/n corrected lovingly. She smiled softly at him, temporarily forgetting about the painful bruises that had led them to this tender moment.

Finnick smiled back. “Yeah.” He stepped closer to y/n, never breaking eye contact. “We are made for much more than to be his pawns. And I vow, one day it won’t even be something we have to worry about ever again”.

Y/n stared deeply into Finnick’s calming and beautiful eyes. “Maybe I was made for loving you, Fin,” she commented dazedly.

“Wh-…What?” Finnick stumbled breathily. “What, honey?” He asked. He couldn’t have possibly heard her correctly.

Y/n smiled tenderly at Finnick. She pulled his hands towards her, pleased when his feet followed and brought the rest of him with. “I said, ‘maybe I was made for loving you, Fin’,” y/n happily repeated.

“I.. I don’t…,” Finnick gasped with a timid shake of his head.

Y/n smiled up at Finnick as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “It’s never even been a choice,” she admitted admiringly, “although if it were, it’d have been the easiest decision in all of Panem history”. “It’s just so easy and comfortable to love you, Finnick. It’s just so right”. She shook her head lovingly as she continued to peer into his sea-green eyes that felt like home.

Finnick knew he was undoubtedly a blushing mess. But he didn’t care. “Well,” he mumbled and cleared throat. “If that’s something one can be made for, then I was made for loving you, my dear,” he hummed. Finnick smiled lovingly at y/n before bowing his head to kiss her forehead.

“One day everyone will know that’s all we’ll ever have been made for,” y/n hummed, returning Finnick’s encouraging sentiment from earlier. She leaned into his kiss and cuddled up in his arms.

Finnick was careful in his positioning due to y/n’s bruises, but he nevertheless returned her embrace. He cautiously held her to him with a soft sigh. “One day, honey, one day”.

Think I forgot how to be happy

Something I'm not, but something I can be

Something I wait for

Something I'm made for

Something I'm made for

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[idontmindifuforgetme]

u don’t have to answer this if u don’t want to or u feel u don’t have anything to say on it (obvi) but how do u deal with jealousy and comparison?

i genuinely just like my shit. i love how i look like, i love my stuff, i love where i come from, i love my family and friends, and i appreciate all the circumstances (good and bad) that have led me to be the person i am today. i've done a lot of esteemable things that have bolstered my confidence growing up, like getting an extremely hard degree and pushing myself outside of my comfort zone more than ever before. i treat other people w kindness and respect. i make sure to be a source of support rather than needless negativity. what people think of me (or have) doesn't get under my skin anymore, bc i've already proven my worth to myself. the fact of the matter is, i'll always hold my own opinion of myself higher than i do other people's opinions of me. i'm at a place where i just don't care that much. i've lost the need to correct people on their takes of me a long time ago.

my own happiness is king--everything else is secondary. if i like it, that's enough for me.

i find it pointless to compare myself to somebody else, simply because no two people have been dealt the exact same cards. i wouldn't compare a rose to a lily, so why should i be comparing myself to people who're--no matter who they are, no matter where they're from--never gonna be me? i'm me. the only person i should be comparing myself to is my past self. i am only in competition w myself. that is all.

as for jealousy, viewing people who have things i want as proof of concept has really helped. if another person gets a higher score on a test, i don't get jealous that they outdid me. i just view them as proof that i can get that score if i studied more efficiently. someone else's success isn't a lack of your own--it's just proof you can reach that success, even if the route doesn't look exactly the same, even if it might take longer.

contentment is entirely subjective. i've known wealthy people who're incredibly miserable. i've known people who struggle financially but could not be happier. other people's advantages don't rattle me, bc i don't care about them, bc i'm so eternally grateful for what i already have. i've also never really been that materialistic to begin with, so i've always understood that a person's worth lies in who they are rather than what they own (whether it be things, money, opportunities...). i can say w my whole chest that i wouldn't swap places w the most famous, most rich celebrity there is. i legitimately don't want to. i know that even if i have to work harder for things, i'll have more to say by the end of it all, and that in and of itself is so profound. not to mention the satisfaction from having challenged myself to get there--and i love a good challenge.

i've unleared the idea that i should view other women as competition. life is hard, we all struggle, we'll be living in a man's world for a long time, and it's just not worth the energy. yeah i'm ambitious, but not at the expense of other people. there's enough room for everyone. another woman's achievement doesn't mean less space for mine. we'll all be fine.

w all that said!! there are bad days. no human is just confident all the time, doesn't feel jealous all the time, doesn't compare themself all the time, doesn't let people's opinions get under their skin all the time. don't feel bad for doing it every now and then. it's natural and normal and just part of the human experience. nobody is perfect. just focus on you, view other people as inspiration rather than competition, and compare your progress to nobody else's but your own. it's been a game changer for me :)

[nayatarot777]

what you need to know right now ~ messages from your guides

if you’d like a personal reading, then see info here

subscribe to the patreon if you’re interested in daily messages from spirit, weekly pac readings for “the week ahead”, exclusive extended readings to the tumblr PACs, exclusive pac readings - such as 18+ and love pac readings - new moon + full moon readings, plus more. i’m on there everyday, just doing my thing 😂

• pile one •

cards: king of cups, knight of wands, judgement

you’re currently completing the current phase of your spiritual awakening. you’re now stepping into new and heightened awareness with a renewed mind and maybe even a whole new identity. you could be trying to chase after more consciousness and more knowledge to have more awareness about yourself and your reality, but you don’t seem to be realising that you’ve already reached the level of awareness that you set the intentions of having in the past. you could be impulsively seeking answers to things, but the answers lie within how you feel. because your feelings are connected to your intuition. the answers that you’re looking for cannot be found externally at this point. you can’t learn the answers from someone else, or from any body of work or text. you can only give yourself the answer, meaning that being lead by how you feel is what’s needed to finalise this particular spiritual awakening that you’re almost done with, but you could feel disconnected from your intuition or your feelings. that’s the last challenge that you have to focus on: listening to how you feel emotionally and within your body - especially when you think about certain people or remember particular things. you could have a tendency to ignore your feelings or gaslight yourself out of feeling the way that you do. but that’s where you’re going to get your guidance from. you’ve endured a rebirth which definitely wasn’t easy, but i feel like you’re really ascending into your true self. you’ve done a lot of shadow work, and invested a lot of energy into overcoming your own battles which is why your perspective of life is going to shift drastically. meaning that your reality is greatly shifting too. and this will create a state of internal peace and relaxation. but, again, only after you practice feeling. you can’t feel peace if you can’t feel anything to begin with. if you’re emotionally numb, confused, or overwhelmed. you feel how you feel. period. you don’t need anybody’s permission to feel how you feel. if your feelings don’t make sense to others then whatever. you know why you feel the way that you do. you’ve come a very long way in your personal development. you’ve done an extremely good job - keep going! 👏🏾👏🏾

extra message: the universe has heard your call. any behaviours and actions that you may judge yourself for needs to be accepted. not excused, but understood. give yourself more compassion than you are currently. the universe is trying to show you unconditional love but that can only happen when you’re able to feel that and give that towards yourself. that’s when you’ll be able to accept everything that the universe wants to bring to you.

• pile two •

cards: 9 of wands, the fool, queen of cups

you’ve either begun - or are about to begin - a new journey of healing. accepting that you need to heal from some things and stepping out of your emotional comfort zone. you may have a lot of boundaries up around you. and that’s a way to protect your emotions - but it’s keeping you stagnant because the way in which you’re putting boundaries up is a way that you’ve outgrown. i’m seeing that a lot of you have escaped from someone who was a threat to you. someone extremely dark and full of anger - or maybe even rage. for others of you, this could be about you running away from your own shadow. but i’m seeing that you’re reaching the point where you feel like you can’t stay stuck in the same place any longer, and so you need to just take a leap of faith when it comes to acknowledging, feeling, and accepting your shadow. for those of you who haven’t yet managed to get away from whoever this dark ass person is in your life, a new beginning is definitely coming. i heard “a new escape” whatever that means for you. there’s also something about rejecting intuitive messages that you’re receiving about someone who’s being extremely shady around you. spirit’s telling you to stop doubting yourself. just trust yourself for once and protect your energy. don’t let anyone or anything sway you away from what you know intuitively. you’re extremely spiritually protected and it’s okay to focus on feeling again. feeling calm, feeling your raw emotions, and accepting the way that you feel without emotional suppression. maybe someone in your life has taught you that your emotions are a burden. but you’re shedding this conditioning from yourself. i’m proud of you, pile two. celebrate yourself and your achievement 👏🏾🥳

• pile three •

cards: the hierophant, the world, judgement

whatever this message is about, it’s a big deal. all 3 of your cards are major arcana. a very big deal.

you’re realising something about your perspective on the world. something about traditional values, or societal norms - maybe related to work and abundance in particular. i’m hearing that your perception of abundance is shifting from physical abundance to energetic abundance. you’re realising that you’re someone who is already rich and wealthy in multiple ways. spiritually. i’m hearing that you’re gonna feel like you’ve “beaten the matrix” when you fully come to this realisation 😂. the realisation that physical abundance reflects the abundance that you have and that you acknowledge energetically. you’re also realising that you’re being given some type of responsibility related to your purpose here in the world. a lot of you could be coming to realise what you feel like your actual purpose is, due to something that makes you feel so fulfilled. and as you follow this purpose, you’re going to realise how finding abundance and value in the work that you do in this world is leading to the world being given to you. this could actually lead you to breaking out of a creative block. you’re entering such a creative period in your life where you co-create with spirit. you’re reaching the answers to questions that you’ve had for a long time - what am i supposed to do? what am i doing here? what is my purpose here? i’m so happy for you, pile 3!!! i’m hearing happy squealing from your guides 😭 they’re celebrating. it’s so cute ☺️

[rrenzwrld]

sound of my heart II

second part! read first part here

may or may not be dragging this but…i’d probably write one more part after this and it’ll be it so, enjoy!

all of you are beautiful, kind, smart, and more than capable. love you guys!

the sound of my heart calls out to you, are you listening?

“nah, we’ll see when he text back.” luckily the message was still on delivered so he hasn’t seen it yet. “you need to learn how to open your mouth when it comes to these niggas. that’s why you keep running into problem after problem. shit, knock them in the head if you need to, they’ll get it.” while you knew deja was right and you and your boyfriend had multiple problems and misunderstandings when it came to communicating, it wasn’t in you to try to start things on your own. but this time and with a little push, you had no choice

ony had eventually read the message and responded saying that he was on the way. although jadeja and taylor wanted to stick around to see how you’d really handle the situation, they ended up leaving the two of you alone.

“you said you wanted to talk to me about something? make it quick, i got practice in an hour.” now that you were on a time limit, you were pushed farther away from what you knew you were supposed to do.

“did you…change your cologne recently?” ony tilted his head in confusion, furrowing his eyebrows at you.

“nah, why?”

“you didn’t smell how you normally smell so i just thought you were trying something different.”

“how do i smell?” like someone else.

“just different.” ony nodded, looking into a blank space on the walls of your room.

“cool, is that all?” of course you wanted to say more but because you prioritized your boyfriend’s time over your own right now, you opted to let it go and hoped to forget about it over time. so you shook your head and watched him get up and head towards the door. “hug?” you gave in and hugged him for another time that day, realizing that he had a completely different outfit on fitting for the practice he’d have in less than an hour. but the smell still lingered and the words itching to escape your throat couldn’t be withheld any longer.

“who…is she?” you whispered against his collarbone as you slowly pulled away from him.

“what?”

“who is she? and why do you smell like her?” it was as if your soul left your body. you hadn’t acknowledged how shaky your voice had become.

“what the fuck are you talking about?”

“who is she? and why do you smell like her?” you repeated but with more confidence in your voice. “just answer me, ony.”

“there is no ‘she’, y/n. i don’t know what the hell you’re going on about but i gotta go.” before you could say anything else, ony had left as quickly as he came. like you thought, trying to step out of your comfort zone to confront a man who had a hard time listening to you in the first place was a complete waste of your time.

weeks had gone by and you didn’t have the energy to do much of anything but go to class, get food, and come back to your room. of course you’d hang out with jadeja and taylor occasionally, but you couldn’t shake the fact that you hadn’t talked to your boyfriend in weeks even after he left for another one of his away games. you weren’t even sure if he was your boyfriend anymore. the last conversation you had with him was the first time you ever thought to speak up to what you had an issue with and you never thought that would be the one time it crashes everything.

“it’s the fact he hasn’t called or texted you either. definitely has another bitch.”

“deja.” taylor side-eyed at jadeja’s comment.

“i’m being honest. i wanna beat the nigga ass for you but i’m more proud of you for doing what you needed to do. how he reacted says everything.” mentally, you weren’t there.

“i wanna go to chipotle.” jadeja and taylor looked up at you. “yall coming?”

“shit…don’t have to tell me twice. c’mon deja!” taylor slid on her ugg slides and threw on her coat as she waited with you at the door for jadeja to get her shoes on.

the three of you got to chipotle and you were the first to order so you just sat and waited for deja and taylor to be done. you scrolled on your phone a bit before getting bored and putting it down to listen and watch the people around you subtly. but you knew you were listening too hard when you thought you heard ony’s name. you heard his name but you looked around and he wasn’t there so you just thought you were tripping.

“i don’t know if it’s me being nosy but i think that’s the new bitch that’s got ony’s attention.” deja walked over with taylor and you saw that she was dying to tell you that. you and taylor subtly looked up to see a pretty girl giggling and laughing while looking to be she was on facetime with someone.

“that could be anybody, deja. yall ready?”

“let’s go this way…” deja led the way towards the other door in the store that would put the three of you in the background of the girl’s phone. luckily she wasn’t budged by it. but unfortunately for you, the person the girl was on facetime with had his face completely in the camera and you hated yourself for even taking a glance over.

all of you got back in the car and discussed what happened.

“y/n please tell me you saw that.” deja turned to you and you looked straight ahead, trying not to cry.

“you okay?” taylor reached over from the back seat and rubbed your back. but you didn’t know why but that set you off and you just began crying. crying until you couldn’t stop. you hadn’t cried about it since it happened but the thing was that you weren’t even really sure what happened. you just knew that whatever it was, it was over and you couldn’t take it. you loved ony and the fact that it was more than possible that you lost him without even a blink of your eye without any explanation was hurting you everywhere at once.

“it’s not your fault, girlie…” taylor and deja consoled you.

“right, he a bitch forreal. you’re beautiful, smart, good head on your shoulders, everything.”

“he lost a great thing. it’s his loss and he’ll regret it.” you couldn’t help but smile through your swollen eyes and that’s all your friends wanted right then. but all the crying made you hungry.

“awww pretty,” taylor wiped the tears from your face. “ready to eat now? shit’s getting cold.” you laughed and deja agreed with her.

you had just initially planned to go to chipotle but deja and taylor decided to make a “quick trip” to the mall that lasted a few hours. all the time you spent away from your phone and in your room helped you cope somewhat with how you were feeling. you wished the day could last forever. but nothing lasts forever.

[ ony!❤️ ] : hey

[saturnianprincess]

[𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐝] 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫

In this reading, I will tell you all the details about your first meeting/date with your Future Spouse/Partner. How to choose a pile: Close your eyes, meditate on the piles if you feel like and pick the one your intuition guides you to. As always take what resonates and let the rest fly! Hope you enjoy this reading :)

1 -> 2 -> 3

Pile 1

An unexpected meeting with your FS/FP is the first message I got! It feels like this will be very spontaneous or it might not exactly be a date but the vibes will very much be date-worthy. I feel those who chose this group, your FS/FP is a very unpredictable person (in a good way), they have a unique approach to life in general and you will definitely catch that when you meet them for the first time. You may also be embodying rebellious energy or just breaking away from the norms. For some, you might be in a mentally drained state before you meet. Anyways, there seem to be other people definitely involved in either setting you both up or maybe they invite you to a party or ask you to hang out with their friends. You both might go to a bar/club or some sort of place with music, people, and drinks. You may feel a bit nervous or anxious initially and may think that they might judge you. But those feelings will pretty much vanish when you start talking to them. They will make you feel very comfortable and from the entire experience, they will come across as a very emotionally mature person. They are your soulmate and you might get some weird inkling about that when you both meet. The energies on the date feel very calm and zen. Even if you are with a group of people, I see you both moving aside and having your own conversation and enjoying each other's company. Additionally, for some of you, I see that you and your person decide to go somewhere else. It's very spontaneous and I think it correlates to the energy of your FS/FP. Overall, the meeting leaves you both feeling very satisfied and emotionally content.

Extra messages: Ferris Wheel, Ice-cream from a cone, concerts, July, December, 7, 22, 15, angel number 777

Pile 2

This date is all about you embodying your own power and trying out new things. You are challenging yourself to step out of your comfort zone. For some of you, I see that you actually might meet your FS/FP through a one-night stand situation or your ‘date’ is just a causal hook up. While for the rest, you might find yourself with a lot of options and people. So you go on this date as a something temporary and just for the experience. I feel like some of you or your FS/FP are not planning to date or get into a relationship. Some of you might get dinner with them before doing anything spontaneous. I see some expensive wine and a fancy restaurant. Your FS/FP really treat you properly, might even go shopping or just spending money on you. I don’t feel like they have to put that much effort. They are a real charmer and they know how to treat someone on a date. They have a lot of experience when it comes to dating. While on the date you both could bond over your childhood memories or your life as a teenager. I feel like you will realize how similar your life is to theirs, like many common themes and experiences. I also see that for some you might be reconciling or reconnecting with someone from your past or childhood. Maybe friends or neighbors who grew apart and reconnect later sort of trope (but this is for some people not everyone). You both will love to indulge in finer things and appreciate art and other luxurious stuff in the same way. Also, I am strongly picking up on financial abundance from your FS/FP. They could be financially well off or come from a wealthy family.

Extra messages: lion symbolism, red wine, October, November, 21, 4, angel number 222

Pile 3

Alright so right off the bat, those who chose this group, your first meeting happens after a either an ending of a relationship platonic or romantic. Some sort of heartbreak and emotional pain. I am also picking up on financial instability or job loss for some of you. You will embody a different energy, where you reinvent yourself and undergo and massive spiritual and emotional purging. You will start focusing on yourself and filling your own cup. Once you reach this level of self-satisfaction and being content with who you are will you meet your FS/FP. This is a very fated person and you will feel it once you start making these changes. You will feel more aligned to your destiny. The date itself will be very much written in the stars. You and your FS/FP are very giving people and when you attain a balanced state of your energies together. I feel like the date will be something out of your regular routine. Most likely out of boredom and to seek some excitement you end up going to this random place which you never frequent or you randomly decide to go hangout with some people and thats when you meet your FS/FP. There is also a high possibility that you may have already heard of or seen this person but not really gotten to know them.

Extra messages: birthday cake, spring season, cherry blossoms, March, September, 25, 27, 8, angel number 444

©️Saturnianprincess 2023 | home

[crazyfandomluver]

*clears throat and leans into the mic* oc update. *disappears*

Hey!

So. I figured out a bit more about my shadow company oc, and I need to share it so here’s what it is:

I decided I didn’t want him to be a soldier, we already have plenty of those, and I know we already have a medic. I was originally thinking about making him a cook, because someone has to cook for all this hungry babies, right??? WRONG. They can make their own food for themselves and for others. What these lil fellas really need, is some gosh dang THERAPY. So he’s gonna be a therapist and help his precious buddies😌

As another thing relating to therapy, he’s pretty adamant about them not bottling up their feelings, and finding some way to unleash their feelings. If they don’t want to talk about it, he’s turned an empty office room into a rage room where they can safely destroy things (The walls do not count PIXEL. You will break your fist, PIXEL.) My oc has made sure to provide safety gear, and has had soldiers bring back items from the war zone so that the soldiers can take care of pent up energy.

However, if they DO want to talk about it, he would love to sit down and talk with them! Nothing will be shared outside of his office, and he makes sure that they can feel as comfortable as they can.

He’s also REALLY good with his hands. In a crafty way, of course. He’ll often spend most of his free time making plushies, pillows, bean bags, and other things for soldiers. He’s very skilled, and very sneaky about finding out what soldiers would like, in ways ranging from having others ask about it, to sneaking the question into the end of a session. He’ll often make something for someone while they’re on a mission, and then when they come back, he’ll either give it to them personally, or they’ll find it on their bunk with a little note :) Unfortunately due to the danger that’s normally present on missions, there has been a few times where he’ll be waiting outside of the transport vehicle with the thing he made for them, watching for the soldier to exit, only to find out that they died on the mission. He knows how to handle his own grief of course, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.

I had started thinking about what I wanted his first name to be, (because he’s not a soldier so he doesn’t have a callsign or a number) and the first name that came to mind was Adam, and I couldn’t think of anything else so… he finally has a name now! 🥳 I also decided that his last name will be Takker, which is pronounced ‘Tah-care’

Also, here’s a plushie I decided that he would make based off this dog toy that I found!

Plushie Grandpa Russell the Opossum!! Of course, the head wouldn’t be made of rubber, but I’m sure you get the idea 😅 This is just one of the things that Adam would make, including bean bags and other things. He’s also good at painting and stuff and has even drawn on his knife that he has for self defense so it’s a neat little custom decal knife ^^

I feel like he would definitely enjoy having a family, he in fact has a sweet wife who works part time on weekends and bakes him things to take to work and to his friends, and one adorable little girl who he brings to work on ‘bring your kid to work’ day. Her name is Asher, and she carries around this little unicorn plushie that Adam made for her 🥰

I will eventually draw him. (Eventually could be anywhere from today to 5 years later)

@pampanope @mrsphillipgraves @whitewolfmystery @theseareregularthoughts