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sunnysideaeggs · 5 months ago

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uuuuh okay thoughts about S2E1 (disclaimer: SPOILERS! and some unpopular opinions bc i WILL be criticizing alicent). most of these i had during my watch yesterday, and now i’m elaborating on them after more thinking about it. looooong post ahead

okay i liked the new intro. i will miss the blood pouring but i think the tapestries are a more visual way to convey targaryen history.

my favorite parts were the shot of vhagar and balerion in the field of fire(? idk they were eating men (green dragon black dragon !!!), the jaehaerys and alysanne portrait, alicent and rhaenyra and aegon and rhaenyra crowned side by side. beautiful.

also, the blood beneath the thread !!! targaryen history is written in blood. never forget this.

i dont particularly like jace being at the wall. it makes little sense to me, especially because the north is massive and i don’t think that cregan would like to make a procession to the wall just because a prince is there. i liked the tidbits though: jon going to the watch is a tradition he followed unknowingly :)

show me more political jace please, he’s cool.

‘surely torrhen would’ve rather died instead of bending the knee unless he believed aegon could bring unity to the 7K’ jace pls 💀

it’s funny that in one scene rhaenys and daemon had more tension and chemistry than all the scenes of daemon with adult rhaenyra. maybe what he needs is a GILF to put him in his place? lmao

LAENA MENTION LETS GOOOOO

‘make it a son for a son’ referring to aemond? alicent has no bone to pick here be fr i can smell bleach for the whitewashing a mile away

i also have issue with the writers’ choice of making rhaenyra ignore her physical needs and spend apparently days riding on dragon back and doing jumps and that when she just had a miscarriage. it’s canon that she was in bed rest for half a year because the loss of visenya took a toll on her body. it will be dumb and criticized if she’s fine to disappear for weeks but not to fight.

alyn velaryon? ok i’m mad bc corlys literally knows this dude is his son ???

i love how we all pretend that corlys and rhaenys were particularly interested in the strong boys. idk i can’t really care about that anymore

ow is helaena sewing alicent a dress? please tell me it’s not a shroud

AEGON APPEARED WOOO 🍳✨

‘where’s jaehaerys? where are his lessons?’ my man doesn’t know to what school his kids go lol

also he can recognize the twins apart with only seeing them :)✨ cute

aegon wanted jaehaerys in his council !!!! he’s making sure jae KNOWS he’s his heir and he’s on aegon’s mind

oh hel is comfortable enough with him to tell him about her prophecies, i’m just afraid that no one understand her

‘the rats’ NOOOOO

aegon is always like ‘😐❔’ around her lol

‘the queen is an enduring mystery’ he’s a poet i love him

alicole pussyeating but at what cost

why does criston has that empty look in his eyes, he had the same look in his scene with rhaenyra

where is all the raw emotion between them from last season? it’s giving cersei and lancel when it should be cersei and jaime. no deep gazes, no catholic guilt, something’s amiss

jaehaerys and egg </3 my feels they’re so cute

okay i have a bone to pick here because why is tyland being treated like a joke? i can get past jaehaerys toying with him because he’s a child, but aegon respected his allies (that’s a big part about him) and would never antagonize them in that way. it’s given rhaenyra and lady redwyne when we know both characters differ the most in the way they treat their subjects.

also, this is TYLAND LANNISTER, the most employed guy ever. he literally put his skin on the fire for his team, he’s loyal and he’s the best ally the greens could’ve asked for. if anyone is to thank for the death of the dragons, it’s him. put some respect on his name because this is the finance bro to end all finance bros.

also he’s always saying important things: the treasure in the green council, jason’s moves here. please listen to him!

another thing i dislike is the way important political moves are being brushed off. the treasure is a big big matter. it should be said explicitly what the council is doing about it being the focus of the scene. i’m sure most casual viewers didn’t catch that the comedic relief is making big money moves that will backfire later.

but anyways jaehaerys is so cute hehe

happy father’s day to aegon targaryen and aegon targaryen only

okay i’m rewatching the jaehaerys and tyland scene and i love tyland’s accent, and how polite he is to the little prince

go aemond in the council !!!

‘you do not have a seat in this council’ okay alicent please stfu. i disliked her demeanor since she was chastising aegon and tyland but this is too much. remember you do not have a seat either.

and no she doesn’t: she’s queen mother, not queen regent. aegon is an able adult and can rule without her help. i know the only council we had was with cersei but that’s because joffrey and tommen were under westeros’ age of majority. that alicent is there is out of aegon’s kindness and the council members’ respect.

also why would she be mad that the brothers are brothering ??? girl you wanted them to be on each other’s side

SUNFYRE MENTION LETS GOOOO

‘we must proceed cautiously’ i think all caution must be thrown overboard here. i know they want to portray A/R as the ‘voices of reason’ being pushed to war and all but sometimes violence is necessary to prevent more violence. what tywin said about murdering a dozen people in a dinner and a thousand in battle.

i’m tired of this aemond slander. he did it, but he’s innocent your grace

why larys kinda…

ok i love his voice

oh so now every move of alicent is seen by larys. she knows that he knows. neat.

why do the handmaidens wear green? they should wear gold ☀️

okay i initially thought syrax was sunfyre because of the pink of his wings. i hope sunfyre is golden smh

it’s neat that we remember than no matter what side we’re on, for the common people dragons are a source of fear and caution. the fishermen are loyal to rhaenyra yet they will run away from her when she’s on syrax because they don’t trust a dragon.

rhaenyra’s pain is so deep, i really empathized with her. absolutely devastating. her expression, her grabbing the cape, everything

emma is so fucking talented for real, making me feel for the death of a character i dislike

(oh how the mourning of a woman for her child will cause thousands of mothers mourning their children the same)

‘aegon the magnanimous’ when your homie gives you a ridiculous nickname

my boy sits and listens to his subjects, calls them by their names and tells them not to be afraid. hello jerard what can i do 4 u? :)

i love how egg is like ‘yea whatever take ur sheep jerard pls like me’

okay i dislike otto here. aegon is obviously into crowd pleasing (a secret tool that will be useful later) and for once it’s okay. jerard will go home with his sheep and be a diehard aegon supporter and raise his kids to be the same, tell his friends about the king’s generosity. i think otto should know better than to angry the population in time of war, even if you can’t make the flock whole, give the man grain or coin so he can feed his family and the effort of going to the king’s house.

hugh? like hugh hammer? ooooh

‘our victory depends on the efforts of the smallfolk’ close enough welcome back princess diana

another otto slander moment here. i don’t think it’s wise to chastise the king (an adult, mind you) and putting himself in between of aegon and the court like that. did we saw otto with viserys? he sat by his side and whispered his advice in a discreet manner. he didn’t try and strongarmed his king in front of dozens of people. that’s not a smart way of doing things. it’s called soft power for a reason

also, i think the directors were trying to make otto parallel tywin in that joffrey in the throne scene, but tywin was explicitly trying to get joffrey to be more involved in the council and the two were alone. give it to aegon, let him have his fun in public and manipulate him in private, that is the way. doing dumb shit like that only makes aegon look like a kid and otto like a shameless powergrabbing dude

one thing i appreciate is that aegon has his own court. he has his lads-in-waiting, he has a few ladies following behind, and that’s how a king should be. we always saw the royal kids isolated (joff, tommen, rhaenyra only had alicent) when in reality most important people will have a flock of people accompanying them every day.

now that’s what i’m talking about. larys is all about being subtle, honey trapping his way to power. that’s how the game of thrones is played. while aegon will not agree with him just like that (because larys gives him the oogies), i’m sure he will remember larys’ words.

‘as viserys wished’ oh don’t speak of him fuck what he wants

an ally would not sit there and cut her legs at the table of men? girl you do that yourself

alicent, the problem is not otto undermining you, is both of you yapping about shit aegon and aemond not care about and winning empty victories lol

aegon will probably forget about jerard next episode, but will not forget feeling his wings being cut by otto. aemond remained in the council room but will remember alicent wanting him gone.

i wish alicent and otto believed more on their kids/grandkids

mysaria apparition yay

‘you speak of highborn games, i am common born’ tell him girl

daemon don’t put your hands on women challenge: impossible

chemistry with mysaria? uuuuh

i love how everyone reminds erryk of arryk like ‘ayo where ur bro at?’ a matching set is not matching, it’s giving the parent trap

‘i want aemond targaryen’ okay at least she knows who to blame. i want to see more of vengeful rhaenyra, let women be mad

daemon going for aemond instead of for jaehaerys is such a cheap move smh, whitewashing at its finest

jaecarys and rhaenyra :(

is it too insensitive to say that jace’s hair looks great? you’re serving cunt? your brother just died and you’re serving cunt?

ow alerie florent :((((

FUCK VISERYS TARGARYEN

i really like the symbolic funeral. that shot of rhaena crying over the fire? chills

is it me or they changed joffrey’s actor? idk

uuuuh alicent idk if that’s empathy or weakness 🙃

once again i don’t think it’s neat that they show blood being a normal goldcloak. he was discharged dishonorably for femicide. be honest

cheese’s actor kinda looks like joaquin phoenix

‘i want aemond targaryen’ i hate this fucking show.

ROSBY AND STOKEWORTH MENTION LETS GOOO

criston agreeing with aemond in private but backing alicent in public is the medieval version of ‘yea kid ur right but i don’t wanna fight with your mom’

criston looks so tired :(

‘her grace speaks with two tongues’ SAY YOUR TRUTH AEMOND

it is vain to try and blame aemond for starting the war when the war was brewing since before he was born. rhaenyra wouldn’t give up her claim, daemon wouldn’t accept it. if rhaenyra ascended, the targtowers die. there’s not another version of this story

‘she holds love for our enemy, that makes her a fool’ that makes her a traitor. especially after the events of tonight. do we think rhaenyra has a designated green supporter that tries to get her to the green’s side? why would the greens have a rhaenyra cheerleader then?

gods forbid something happens and otto is not there 🙄 control freak

i like how they’re making aemond more rage-filled. careful ewan your book!aemond is showing

‘aegon the strong’ ‘my nephews have already taken that one’ but egg 💀💀💀

i really love how aegon has his court. he’s protected by the throne’s swords AND his homies got his back

the true king can sit however he likes. he lounges on the swords and they’re as soft as pillows to him. pretenders can’t relate.

in a deeper level, it shows how he’s comfortable both in the throne and surrounded by people. he has high trust. kinghood is a tool he doesn’t have any training on but he holds it like a natural

aegon truly trusts aemond. i love that for them. if they make aemond to be treacherous i’ll cry

AEGON THE DRAGONCOCK 🐲 rip leon estermont you would’ve loved shitposting

also why the ratcatchers are just walking around the keep? are they in the tunnels or in plain sight?

the kick to the doggie :( i really hope they didn’t really kick a dog for that

unrelated but i really need the rats around the red keep to mean something like larys skinchanging into them. they can’t be a red herring or just blood and cheese. they have too many shots

again, why are they out and about? isn’t it weird to see dudes in the middle of the night?

helaena’s maid looks like emma stone and she has really good eyebrows. i’m pretty sure she knows something (larys agent ofc)

how do we go from searching for aemond to threatening helaena? whyyyyyyy

oh right we had to blame the smallfolk for being soooo greedy and wicked and stupid that you tell them kill a great warrior and they kill a baby. because daemon can’t ever order a baby killed amiright?

the little beds noooooo :( baby jaehaerys

okay i was expecting more of helaena. in the books she’s described as pleading, begging, crying and so on. phia is killing it with the eye expressions but she looks stiff in comparison with only her necklace. even trying to bargain more (my husband can give you everything and more), some more tears, some stuttering would fit show!helaena’s too. that’s on the directors tho

i also dislike the choice that anyone can just barge in the room, literally they had to make the castle desert instead of blood and cheese waiting for hel in alicent’s rooms. i know someone is going to make the point of ‘why didn’t helaena scream or run?’ and yes partly. guess we had to slander alicent in another way right?

but alas, i am thankful that a prediction of the scene didn’t came true: no children being forcefully stripped. that would’ve sent me over the edge. they implied it but no child actors were harmed in this episode

omg the sounds of the head cutting and jaehaerys’ muffled sounds i wanna cry

helaena is so lost and the castle is a maze and nobody’s there and she’s lost lost lost and running with jaehaera i can’t

did she saw a vision there? when she stopped and went to alicent’s room

imagine going to comfort for your mom and she’s at it

‘return to your post lord commander’ why didn’t you criston? 🙃

also it didn’t pass me by that aegon has THREE kingsguards in addition to his four homies and his own sword. helaena had none. even if he was off duty and he’s sworn to alicent and not helaena, the lord commander is not commanding

THREE maids at the start of the episode doing absolutely nothing and none here? i’m so mad

‘they killed the boy’ :(((((

also why is helaena so disconnected? like why is she ‘able’ or is she in shock? i hope if they don’t make her go insane with pain like in the book she gets a revenge arc where she goes on dreamfyre, she deserves it.

i hope aegon kills them all.

#i really yapped my yappers away in this one #hotd #hotd critical #house of the dragon season 2 #hotd season 2 spoilers #hotd season 2 discussion #hotd spoilers #team green #buuuut in this one i don’t talk all that shit about team black for a change and also #alicent hightower critical #long post #aegon ii targaryen #helaena targaryen #aemond targaryen #anti daemon targaryen #tyland lannister #bc i love him and defend him a lot here #sunny cooks 🍳🍷

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piosplayhouse · 9 months ago

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Outline for modern genderbend svsss au where they're all trans milfs (except for Binghe who is trans still but not a milf) cinematic universe:

[Act 1] Shen Yuan was on his path to a teaching degree at age 22~23 and began shadowing high school tenured teacher Shen Jiu (no relation, they just have the same last name and hate it) where he changes a young Binghe's life by protecting him from bullying and just generally being a better teacher than sj. Right before Binghe's last year of school, sy's health takes a sudden decline, he's hospitalized, and he has to postpone his degree. Through a miscommunication, Binghe believes that sy was fired for having too much contact w Binghe and is now somewhere else- devastated, he enrolls at the prestigious, yet secretly abusive, uni that sy had pushed him to apply to, with the goal of becoming successful enough to pull strings and give sy whatever he wants

[Act 2] While hospitalized, Shen Yuan staves off boredom by being terminally online. Through this, he meets and quickly becomes unlikely friends with 40 something year old mid tier author Shang Qinghua. Sqh offers sy an admittedly unglamorous job as her editor since he's pretty much given up on his degree at this point, as well as a place to stay away from his family when he gets out of the hospital. Sy accepts and after moving in, gets to know sqh, who is a trans woman who transitioned in her 30s when her first big book deal put her in a stable enough position to do so. Sy realizes she is also trans; the two gradually make sqh's newest work a bestseller and she's suddenly inundated with publishing and movie deals. Happy times. Meanwhile, Binghe becomes a demon (frat boy)

[Act 3] Sy hits 30, now comfortable in her cushy job as sqh's editor/agent. Unfortunately, she is tragically diagnosed with breast cancer shortly after her birthday. She undergoes a double mastectomy and luckily fully recovers with a strong support network, but the stress has taken its toll on her and her health and she begins going grey early. Binghe, now also a girl yippee, received unexpected inheritance money sometimes during uni and used it to become a highly successful businesswoman with connections throughout the education, political, and publishing spheres (because she remembers shen yuan was a big reader and wanted to be a lit professor). Now on the hunt for her old teacher, she's tipped off to her new life by business partner gilf-fucker Mobei Jun (38) who recently started seducing sqh

misc: in her 20s sqh made some quick cash by donating sperm, so biologically she is actually probably a grandma at this point

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themoodyestj · 1 month ago

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hey, i heard that you love to speculate on other people's lives, so i did some speculation of my own, this is my theory hear me out i think the reason you hate the Ackles so bad is that you are secretly gay, but you are homophobic and deeply in the closet. you hate Danneel because she was your gay awakening (i don't blame you, she's hot as fuck) and you hate being gay. you always say you don't want to fuck Jensen and that's true, you actually want to fuck his wife so bad that it makes you despise him, you are jealous of him, not her. he's the one who has what you want. so, you run a secret anti Jensen blog that is disguised as an anti Danneel blog, because you hate them both, but you don't want anyone to find out that you're gay, so you pretend to be a Jensen fan. i'm 100 percent right, i'm certain of it, because i have eyes and i'm an expert on body language. Boink!

Dear Anon, I'm gonna level with you. I have recently caught a head cold and I was feeling like death warmed up, but you surely made me laugh! Thank you for that! Also, it is always refreshing to get a delulu in my inbox. No matter how crappy I feel, it's always comforting to know I'm not you. I have to take a page out of Misha's book and come clean... I am straight. But if I *were* gay, it wouldn't be for ze kween, dear God, have you seen that? I'd be gay for Scarlett Johansson. I don't know, Meryl Streep (such a GILF), Emma Stone, Anne Hathaway. You know, real actresses. I'd even be gay for Gen, if I'm being honest! Her voice sounds a lot better, she seems a lot more loving, she actually does shit that works and she's a lot prettier! Another thing I love about her, is that she seems like she can actually read, instead of keeping books on a shelf for photos. And she's really really classy. She shines without trying too hard. I mean, compare this:

With this:

It may be a matter of taste, but if I were gay, I think I'd like my girl to not be trashy or slutty. To leave something for the imagination, you know? No joke, for me, this dress is the female equivalent of this:

If only there would be one of those in lace. And now that I come to think of it, Cohen was a lot more famous wearing a disgusting mankini that your Kween ever got wearing... those things she does, titties showing and all. Weird, right? A man's hairy body and junk hanging is more valuable than your Kween. Gotta hurt. Last but not least, if I may ask you a few questions (you can answer in delulu, I took a few classes).

1. Is it possible to be gay and homophobic?

2. Why are you using the word gay as an insult? (hellers are coming for you, yes they are, you homophobic piece of shit smeared in hairy low hanging balls, big disgrace for mankind. poor excuse of a human being)

3. How is my blog secret? Oh... You thought you *found* it? Through *extensive research*? Oh honey....

4. How did you read my body language? I'm curious. Did you find me hot? Im hot. If you saw me, you know Im hot. Hotter than your kween (which, admittedly, isnt very hard, so its not even much of a flex).

5. And last but not least, will you be so kind to take a survey? My blog aims to make everyone feel included, including society parias and looneys like you. So I just launched a survey to try and understand you guys better to better serve your needs. You can answer it by clinking on the link.

I'm looking forward to hearing your opinion! In @themoodyestj we aim to please, while giving you a thorough reality check!

#anti danneel #anti danneel ackles #anti aas #anti delulus

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opaloharas · 4 months ago

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lazy sunday

hello!

for the last few months, i have been thinking about older miguel. and by older, i mean... grandfather age (i.e. gilf) i got the inspiration mostly from a movie with benjamin bratt i watched too eeek.

this is a little snippet and something unrelated to a whole story i have planned out but i have been eager to post something!

a special thanks to my pookies in the discord server ! especially @bluesidez because this would not have happened if we did not talk about this !

cw: a disclaimer: THIS IS NOT A SUGAR DADDY/SUGAR BABY relationship and THIS IS NOT a dad's best friend situation either (not saying these are bad, just not the dynamics of my story!) just two strangers who fell in love :3, age gap (miguel is 55 and reader is late twenties like 29 to early thirties), fluffy, breakfast in bed, evening cruises, smut, Miguel is a lil freak but he loves reader, oral (f & m receiving), wholesome domestic activities, P in V, unprotected sex (do not do!), miguel being a little introspective, i think that is it !

Sundays are meant for resetting before the week starts. They are meant to prepare your mind and body for the weight of the world that is going to crush you within the next twenty-four hours.

In the O’Hara house though, Sundays are meant for lazing around and loving. Through tender touches in the morning, and breakfast in bed, Miguel wants to make sure that you feel loved through and through. In his fifty-five years of life, he has learned all the right ways to keep his partner happy.

When he woke up on this particular Sunday, he saw you sleeping beside him, curled up in the blankets with your hair splayed on the pillow like a halo.

“My angel..” he whispered, tenderly touching your cheek with his knuckles.

He shuffled downstairs, already deciding how to surprise you. Through apples cut into little turtles, carefully cutting a mango, and making the fluffiest omelet his hands had ever crafted. He smiled at his work before making a mug of green tea for you in the mug he bought for you to have here. Another touch that you were the one he cherished.

His venture back upstairs had him feeling like an old maid, his hands full as he nudged the bedroom door open with his foot, stopping again to admire you while more sunshine filtered into the room. If he was not holding the tray so tight, everything would have fallen off of it. Carefully, he set the tray down on the nightstand, shaking you awake gently.

“My sweet angel… let’s wake up, hmm?” He cooed, watching as your eyes fluttered open, your long lashes touching against your browbone.

You rubbed your eyes, the smell of breakfast causing you to wake up a little faster as you reached for the plate, “Thank you so much. You didn’t hav-” Miguel cut you off by placing a mango chunk against your lips, shaking his head.

Oh, how he loved you so.

The morning passed with lazy kisses and snuggles before he stretched, releasing a loud groan as he did so, the paper he was reading in bed tossed somewhere on the bedroom floor. He knew that you both had to do at least something so he encouraged you to get out of bed with him. Both of you got ready and the whole time, he was admiring you. He watched how you curled your lashes, and how your mouth hung open while you applied your mascara. He did not think you needed any cosmetics but he loved how makeup brought you joy. He buttoned up his shirt, thankful for this moment with you before he planted a kiss on your lips, holding onto your waist as you both walked out of your joint bathroom.

The middle of the afternoon called for grocery shopping. Grocery shopping with you was something he never thought he would enjoy. Seeing your eyes sparkle as you picked up a new type of jam or exclaimed your excitement for raspberries being on sale, made his heart soar. He followed behind you or either had his hand resting on your lower back, comfortable with the minimal display of affection. Together, even the simplest of tasks felt like the most romantic.

Hours passed and when you were about to fall onto the couch, craving a morsel of quiet, Miguel jingled his keys from the opposite side of the apartment. The little sound of metal making your heart flutter. It was time for the weekly ritual.

Miguel escorted you out to the Cadillac convertible that you both loved dearly. Every Sunday night, he took you for a drive. It never got old. In fact, the first time he took you out on a drive, he realized that he loved you the first time. His right hand was placed on your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. Miguel’s eyes could barely focus on the road ahead, blinded by your grace as the wind blew your hair back. He could not tell what was brighter- your smile or the sun.

Music filled the silence between you, him, and the world that moved by you while he drove. He still felt nervous around you, after all this time. He would still think he was not good enough for you or that you did not actually love him. But whenever he looked at you, he knew that he was just in his head. He saw how you looked at him and how you would be the person to fill his heart again.

When he pulled up to a stop light, he pushed his sunglasses back up over his nose bump, letting out a contented sigh.

“I am bewitched by you.” He gave a suave smile, causing you to laugh.

“Bewitched? That is a very strong word.” You shrugged, mildly caught off guard by his seemingly passionate declaration. He just looked at you and shook his head, turning up the music as a signal he had nothing else to say.

When the two of you pulled back into the parking area of your home, he looked over at you, his glasses pushed up to keep his hair back.

“Mama,” he started, “You bewitch me. I am madly in love with you. More than you ever will know. And I need to express this to you more. You make me feel like a.. a.. you make me feel whole.” He managed to get out, his palms sweaty. Even though he’s spoken more heartfelt words to you in the past, this time just felt like he was doing it all over again. And when you kissed him and wrapped your arms around his neck, oh, he felt like he did the first time you and him kissed.

Miguel could not contain himself by the time you both got inside. His hands ran up your body, shedding off your little brown sundress, the buttons falling onto the floor.

“That was a vintage piece!” You exclaimed, and he just rolled his eyes and kissed down your bare neck, nipping at the gold necklace he had purchased for you shortly after becoming a couple.

He lifted you with ease, carrying you to your shared bedroom. You stripped down the rest of the way before he lifted you, gently setting you down on the bed before he undressed himself. Your eyes admired every inch of his exposed body, a sense of pride and love rushing through you. You watched as he sunk down onto his knees, taking off your kitten heels and kissing up your ankles to your lower thighs. The last sun rays were filtering in, mixing in with the bedside lamp you had left on earlier before you both went out, making his skin glow.

He looked up at you with warm eyes as he spread your thighs apart, not caring his knees were going to be aching by the time he was finished with you. He rested his head against your thigh, arms hooking around you and pulling your hips closer. His tongue traced up the center of your pussy, his eyes closing as through each taste of you, the more he got lost in his head. His mouth worked slowly and skillfully, his fingers now spreading you apart to give him better access. He spit against you, relishing in the sound of your gasp before he let his tongue savor you again. Your thighs clamped against the sides of his head while you ran your fingers through his hair. Your back arched off the bed before he shifted, sucking against your clit and using the hand that was spreading you open for him to press down on your stomach to hold you in place.

His lips shined with your slick as he pulled away, admiring your spent state. You motioned for him to come onto the bed, scooting up. The bed dipped slightly from his weight joining you, his knees digging into the mattress. He adjusted the pillows behind you, making sure you were comfortable before you moved onto your knees in front of him, eyes focused on his thick cock.

“You are so pretty.. and you treat me like a queen..” You trailed off, taking him into your mouth. Miguel gasped, his head leaning back as he basked in the feeling.

“Mmm.. fuck. Just like that, oh.. right there, you feel so amazing.” He whined, his hands holding onto your head gently. His hips moved forward and he nearly came when he felt you match his rhythm, your nose now pressed into the thick patch of hair on his groin, your eyes looking right up at him. He felt his heart pound in his chest, his eyes squeezing shut before you pulled away from him, leaving him to chase his high.

With a chuckle, he pressed you against the bed, his fingers slipping inside you briefly to prepare you. He replaced his fingers with his cock, a slew of obscenities leaving his lips as his hips met yours. His thrusts were slow and passionate, his fingers lacing with yours as he leaned forward to press kisses against your breasts before finding your lips. He adjusted, pulling your hips up a little more, allowing him to press into you from a different angle. As his movements got more sloppy, he hit all the right spots for you, your moans echoing off of the walls as the headboard slammed against the wall. He released into you, his hair sticking onto his forehead, his body glowing from sweat.

“You’re gorgeous.” He whispered, looking down at you, moving hair out of your face before he rested his head against your chest. His eyes closed, whining as he pulled away from you. Both of you basked in the emotions and love, a comfortable silence settling within the space.

Miguel felt love and Miguel knew the love you and him shared was genuine. And now, as he held you close, he could only wait until tomorrow to tell you how beautiful you are to him when he takes his first breath of Monday morning.

#miguel o'hara #atsv miguel #miguel x reader #miguel ohara x reader #miguel ohara smut #miguel ohara x you #please be nice to me

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merlinrarepairfest · 16 days ago

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Weekly Round Up 1

The first week of posting is done, and we kicked off with a great variety of rare pairs! You can find them all beneath the cut, and we cannot wait for next week! <3

Title: like diamonds we are cut with our own dust AO3 username: SlantedKnitting | @slantedknitting Rating: Explicit Warnings: none Medium/Word Count: 5,068 words Pairing/main characters: Merlin/Elyan Up to 10 tags: canon era, Merlin’s magic is horny

Summary:

Merlin’s magic has always been sensitive to iron. When he moves to Camelot, iron becomes harder to avoid. Especially when the local blacksmith is the most beautiful man Merlin has ever seen.

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/59524846

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Title: Yet Another Super Psycho Love Story AO3 username: merthurianlegends | @samwinjester Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings Medium/Word Count: video & fic (794 words) Pairing/main characters: Gaius/Uther Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (implied) Up to 10 tags: Video, BBC Merlin Rare Pair Fest 2024 (Merlin), Grumpy Old Men, GILF action, GILF, Old Friends, Friends to Lovers, Possession, Spells & Enchantments, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence

Summary:

Uther's bewitchment didn't quite go away, and then mister loose tongue licky-licky caught the King's eye. Maybe there's a kiss in the throne room. Maybe they run a ponzi scheme together. Maybe the goblin sees it as a perfect opportunity to get the ultimate gold (Uther's crown). The possibilities are limitless.

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/59889388

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Title: More Than Being Unknown AO3 username: solsprite | @jayprobably Rating: T Warnings: mild violence, internalised transphobia Medium/Word Count: 4,535 words Pairing/main characters: Leon/Merlin Up to 10 tags: trans!Merlin, trans character by trans author, everyone in Camelot is emotionally constipated, angst with a happy ending, first kiss

Summary:

“Please just—don’t tell Arthur. I’ll go. I’ll leave Camelot as soon as I can, but let me take my secrets with me. Let me say my goodbyes.” “Merlin.” Leon’s always steady voice sounds devastated, and it takes Merlin by surprise. The sheer depth of concern in it is the complete opposite of the reaction he was expecting and he finds he has to look away for a moment to collect himself. “I won’t tell a soul,” Leon continues, despite the fact Merlin can’t even meet his eyes. Sincerity bleeds into his words, the raw emotion from a moment ago seemingly in check, though when Merlin forces himself to look at Leon again, worry is etched clearly on his face. “Nobody is going to make you leave Camelot. I’m just so very sorry you’ve been carrying this alone for so long.”

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/59918920

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Title: Kiss me on the mouth and set me free AO3 username: GuiltyScarl3t | @guiltyscarlet Rating: M Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Medium/Word Count: 1,350 Pairing/main characters: Lancelot/Arthur Pendragon Up to 10 tags: Episode: The Darkest Hour, Episode: Lancelot du Lac, Canon Divergence, Shade Lancelot, Mind Control, Assassination Attempt, Hurt No Comfort, Ambiguous/Open Ending

Summary:

Set in Lancelot du Lac. "These doe eyes, which have been haunting his nights since Samhain— long before that if he’s being honest—meet his own and steal his breath." or Lancelot returns months after Samhain

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/collections/bbcm_rare_pair_fest_2024/works/59982856

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Title: AVALON VOICES AO3 username: be_my_druidess | @the-king-and-the-druidess Rating: T Warnings: Creator chose not use Archive warnings Medium/Word Count: Fanfic/11,039 Pairing/Main Characters: Mordred/Morgana; Morgana, Mordred, Catrina Tregor, Uther Pendragon Tags: Modern Setting, Reincarnation, Arthur Pendragon returns, Heavy angst, Mental health issues, Romance, Morgana-centic, Wicca, Good Mordred, Mental institutions

Summary:

Unable to cope with the loss of her brother and problems with her father and stepmother, Morgana ends up in the Avalon Mental Hospital. She leaves it with the desire to become a witch. Through strange visions, fears and nightmares, she tries to find her way and find out the truth about what is happening to her. This leads her to Mordred, a neo-druid and manager of a Wiccan bookstore.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60021823

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Title: Courage Was The Key AO3 username:RangerJedi67 | @wanderingjedihistorian Rating: Gen Warnings: None Apply Medium/Word Count: 4,337 Pairing/main characters: Leon/Morgana Up to 10 tags: Canon divergence, Siblings Arthur & Morgana, Background Arthur/Gwen, Leon & Arthur friendship, Suspicious Arthur, Protective Gwen, Determined Morgana, Competent Leon

Summary:

“Sir Leon and I wish to marry.” Morgana stood to her full height, carrying herself with surety and courage. Arthur respected that. Her words, however, confused him. Why did she and Leon wish to marry? “You what?” Uther said, tone just this side of incredulous. Squaring her shoulders, clearly preparing to dig her heels in for a fight, Morgana stared right back at him. “I wish to marry Sir Leon,” Morgana repeated. “I will marry him.”

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60028777

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#bbc merlin #merlin rare pair fest #round up post

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eumiya · 10 months ago

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RULES

BE NICE ! don't be mean, if you see someffin that you don't like, don't harass the person who made that someffin!

BE PATIENT ! I am a college student! I have a life outside of my blog, therefore I cannot answer your dms/asks the moment you send it in ! :(

BE MINDFUL ! always put warnings in your asks/dms to me! pls give a heads up on stuff like smut, gore! I am not a nsfw-exclusive blog and minors could be reading your not child-friendly words! not only that, but some people could get very uncomfy with thingys like pee, knives, non-con, etc!

NSFW MENTIONS BELOW !!

YES :3 — fluff, smut, angst, age regression (non sexual), BABIES! (like taking care of a baby character, being a mom to your fictional children, etc!! so cute :3), comfort, pets (like adopting a pet w ur fav chatacter!), bimbo/himbo ppl, choking, voyeurism/exhibitionism, gangbangs (not gangrape doe!), pee (drinking pee too!), LESBIAN STUFFS!!, DILFS MILFS (gilfs cough cough naobito zenin cough cough), drinking/drugs (idk how to write since I've never taken crack or gotten drunk, but I'll do my best!), age regression, etc!

HMMM OK ! — stepcest, dub-con (rape bad!!), somnophilia, daddy/mommy kink, roleplay, blood/fear play, glory holes, public sex, food play,

NONO :( — scat (yuckkk), necrophilia, pedophilia/underage, sexual age regression, shota/loli stuff, bestiality, cheating, male reader (idk how to write in the pov of a man, I sorry!), incest, non-con, body shaming, racist stuffs, homophobia! (like writing for a character who has a confirmed/implied sexuality with an opposite gender ex: jaekyung x female reader, quanxi x male/gn reader, etc.), slurs, I'm not sure what else to add on I'm sorry :( I'm kind of braindead but I'm sure I'll find my icks in the future!

#ᡣ𐭩 forelsho #🌱 | zip your mouth z!

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antacidsnake · 2 years ago

Note

3) I wanna know all of your OCs comfort foods >:3c

Starting with their creation order then

Sylas is the big wolf he is and he’s just as weird as I am in that he gets cravings for sensations. So veggie sticks or kettle cooked chips for that crunch or some chicken or ribs for him to tear the meat off the bone. Finger foods most definitely :3

Red is my big bull and despite his size he’s still a guy who was raised on a farm with his loving parents. The big guy has a habit of baking cookies and cakes and has a bit of a sweet tooth but especially for bitter things like dark chocolate. Him and Sy like to sit on their porch and share a bag of dark chocolate covered berries

The shortest of my guys, Johnny, is a bit of a light eater on account of how he was raised so he doesn’t really snack on anything. When he’s had a rough day and can’t cook he drags out some trail mix and plops on his couch. Tho he loves the suggestions he gets and has plenty of delicious leftovers from the times he goes out with the other guys (all those giants eat a lot more than him) so he’s really less about the food and more about the comfort part

Jake! The beautiful giant lion with the sharp teeth and willingness to tear someone apart, now he had kinda a thing for Chinese food back when he was a twink. Like an occasional treat kinda deal. And then he became a dilf over the years and THEN mutated into his giant self and now he and Sal have been placed on a strictly order out list for all the asian restaurants in West City. No place will let him eat at their buffet bc he’ll just keep going but they’re happy to make a big order for the mammoth feline.

Sal (Salvatore) Colwell is the gilf of the bunch and spends his time with Jake and he doesn’t have a comfort food! (Liar) He spends his time drinking and eating whatever he wants and he doesn’t need anything special. (Truth be told he has a secret love for good old fashioned Italian food bc it reminds him of his mother’s cooking but that’s hush hush)

Finally with Andy! Honestly? I have to give it back to his date night meal with Johnny. The supreme pizza with the perfect drooping cheese mixed with a side of turon (think long sliced bananas golden fried and served with chocolate dipping sauce). The man likes his savory and sweet stuff and yes he also loves pineapple pizza. What he doesn’t know is Maria and Tomás go out of their way to personally freshly make his favorites just for their “nephew” :3

#asks #my ocs #ask game

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calronhunt · 1 year ago

Note

Please tell me more about the modified bliss gilf, I would like to know more about him if you got more to tell!

Yesssss the gilf. He's currently going through some rewrites and isn't a super major character but im starting to like him more. His design is up to be changed because his design doesn't really fit the vibe of everyone else's (its a bit too complicated next to other characters and since hes a minor character I don't want him to stand out too much). Here just some bullet point facts:

- his name is rodger otto

- he's lydia's dad (obvs)

- he's a preacher/priest (i can't remember which one can't have children) for a small sect of Christianity created by afflicted people for comfort. It's not a big part of the story but afflicted persons have been persecuted for a long time because of their demon blood amount. They get called demons and satanic a lot of normal christians, so some of them came together to make a small sect that basically told that the demons in the world are actually the biblical angels, and that afflicted people were closer to god than others

- he is not afflicted btw lol. I think i have him 69% demon blood for the lols

- he's not a great guy! Totally not a cult leader or anything!

- had lydia with a demon who simply goes by "mother"

- is misogynistic <3 doesn't like that Lydia's a girl

- hes cishet

#ask #everything i could say is like. super mega spoilers #so i will plead the 5th for the rest

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zujime · 3 years ago

Note

Can we have the crusaders taking care of their Fem! s/o in her period?

It can be after part 3, everyone lives AU.

And she is having mood swings like suddenly crying or getting moody 😃

CRUSADERS TAKING CARE OF S/O ON HER PERIOD

crusaders x f!reader

CW ￫ established relationships〟headcanons〟female reader〟platonic relationship〟periods

unedited and possible grammar errors

A/N ￫ of course, but for joseph, i'm going to add both part 2 and 3 joseph. lowkey, part 3 joseph is a gilf- you never heard that from me

S2 JOSEPH

￫ He’s so fucking annoying.

￫ You’d be having the worst cramps, lying on the bed and groaning and he’d be making fun of you during all of this. You would probably be crying out of frustration because of him.

￫ But don’t worry, when he notices you’re not laughing with him and you actually don’t feel well, he’s actually serious. Asking what’s wrong and if there is anything he can do to make it better.

￫ If you ask him to go to the store and get you a heating pad, tampon, or pads, he’ll get the heating pad but would be so confused when he has to get pads and tampons. He’d sit there for a good ten minutes wondering what size pad you want and will call you and ask which one and still be confused, but ends up buying a whole bunch.

￫ He’d still make fun of you, whether you’re sad, mad, or something. If you’re randomly mad due to mood swings, he’s mocking you and all.

￫ He’s willing to get you food and snacks, watch television, or just cuddle if you ask for it, but overall he makes this more stressful than your cramps.

S3 JOSEPH

￫ This is a platonic relationship.

￫ He’d probably be a bit more educated since he had a daughter of his own, so when he’s shopping for the stuff you need, he has no problem.

￫ But he still makes fun of you when you have mood swings, though it’s not as bad as when he was younger since he knows better, for example, when you’re upset or sad he tries not to get in the way too much, but sometimes he’ll joke about it.

￫ He’s super weird about food and snacks though, he’d buy you whatever you want but he’d try to like unnecessarily make it look suspicious when he's getting them for you and giving them to you.

JOTARO

￫ He’d already done some research on the subject prior so he has no problem understanding what’s going on with you.

￫ If you want sweet snacks that you’re not really supposed to eat, he’s not getting it for you. At all. He’d probably have you eat fruits or other things that can make it better and you would have no other choice but to eat it cause he’s not giving you another option.

￫ When it comes to shopping for necessities, he already knows what to get. Whatever size you need, he already has it. Need a heating pad? He’s got the best one.

￫ When it comes down to your mood swings, if you happen to be mad he isn’t really affected by it. The most he does is kiss you on the forehead and call it a day. And if you happen to be sad and crying, he’s trying his best to comfort you to the best of his ability. He’s a really good listener so if there’s anything you want to talk about he’s listening.

￫ He doesn’t look like he’d cuddle with you out of the blue, but if you ask he’s completely fine with it.

KAKYOIN

￫ He would already have done research on how the cycle works; what’s going on and how it affects you, so he’s already going to the store to stock up on pads or tampons and a heating pad if you need it.

￫ He probably looked for what could help with nausea or any other symptoms you may be feeling, for example, if you’re feeling nauseous expect him to fix you some ginger tea.

￫ When it comes down to your mood swings, he understands and doesn’t take anything personally if you do happen to snap at him or yell at him out of the blue. He’s very sweet about it all and if you start crying, he’s already comforting you.

￫ He would be mindful of what foods can make your symptoms worse so if you want candy and snacks, he’s getting you fruits and dark chocolate instead. Nothing’s wrong with either of those, but you were really craving something else. He’d probably give in and give them to you anyway.

￫ He’s fine with just cuddling or just enjoying each other’s company and if you need something he has absolutely no problem getting it.

POLNAREFF

￫ He’s super sweet during all of this.

￫ He’d definitely pamper you with sweets and whatever else you ask for, but that does come with a disadvantage.

￫ He doesn’t understand what’s going on and all he knows is that you’re bleeding out of your area. So when you ask him to get you essentials, he’s going to be so confused. A heating pad is no problem, but the pads? Poor guy. He’s probably bringing back the biggest size.

￫ And mood swings are something. If you get mad because of them and happen to take it out on him, he’ll think he did something wrong and probably tear up a bit. And if you’re crying due to the mood swings, he’s panicking.

￫ But when you explain it to him he’s so relieved.

￫ He’ll want to cuddle up with you through most of it though.

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jiamour · 2 years ago

Text

nightmare blunt rotation

pairing: jeno x reader

genre: crack, a little bit suggestive, established relationship, just some guys hanging out

warnings but they’re written like ao3 tags: 18+ (it’s not smut or anything i just don’t want kids to read this), marijuana use, jeno is a lightweight, ¿somnophilia? (but like not really, he’s conscious, the lights just aren’t on in his head, everything that happens is consensual and has pre-established boundaries!!), jeno forgets how to use his mouth, drool (kinda sorta), puppy jeno, oral fixation, hair pulling, jisung thinks he’s stuck in a box and starts crying😔, gilf hunter jaemin, ¿dumbification?, if you get it you get it i just like dumb pliant men, wrote this while high and then didn’t proof read it

word count: 3.4k

sound track: here !!

a/n: shout out to the girlie who helped concoct this monstrosity @dojunie <3 couldn’t have done it w/o you😔🙏

a/n/n: disclaimer this is a major exaggeration of being stoned, do not let this fic scare you away, youll probably only get horny sleepy and hungry

summary: rule 1 is have a good time, rule 2 is dont invite jeno. sadly, the latter was not abided by and now the boys have 3 kids on the way, 1 failed engagement, and 2 money laundering schemes (allegedly)

alternatively: jeno rolls “worst joint ever” asked to leave marks grandmothers basement

marks grandmothers basement was NOT made to hold 7 people. but, mark was watching over her place for a couple weeks while she was on an ‘intimate’ retreat with her boyfriend jaemin, and he swore on his life that it was cool there.

mark had made the grave mistake of thinking the ‘gilf hunter’ occupation in jaemins instagram description was a joke. he invited him over for an innocent brunch with his sweet elderly grandmother only for him to find out 3 months later that jaemin had fucked off to florida with her to swing with other old people, leaving mark in charge of watering her plants and feeding her cats for 2 weeks.

~impromptu text so tumblr is annoying ~

“don’t touch that!” mark yelled, diving at donghyuck who was flipping over a picture frame hung on the wall that had previously been facing backwards. mark made sure to hide every picture of his grandmother before everyone had arrived, not taking anymore risks. making extra sure to discard of the photo with both jaemin and his grandmother present, jaemins arm around her and an evil taunting smile on his lips.

“chill man,” donghyuck laughed, trying to break himself out of marks hold but when mark firmly locked his arms to his sides he gave up and lets himself be manhandled onto the couch without much protest, “i’m a gay man, i don’t want her.”

“he’s heard that one before,” chenle’s shrieking laughter filled the room. god, there really wasn’t supposed to be this many people in this basement, especially loud people whose second language was fighting, and first was arguing.

the basement in question was a basement. nothing extraordinary like mark insisted, you assumed it was just a ploy so that he wouldn’t have to spend the night alone again. the wallpaper was old and peeling off the wall but what could be seen was a dull pink flower pattern, and the washer and dryer seemed to be perpetually running without any clothes inside.

jisung sat cross legged on top of the dryer, he was leaned back so his head occasionally bounced off the wall but he insisted it was comfortable and made him feel like he was on a bus ride everytime he closed his eyes. why he wanted to feel like he was riding a bus, no one could be sure and no one asked. not even renjun who was standing in front of him looking stressed out with his arms out stretched, ready to try to catch the larger boy if he fell. this would probably only result in renjun being crushed but you didn’t want to tell him that and mess with his vibes.

“hey baby, can you give me a paw? no? that’s okay. mark! where do you keep the cat treats?” jeno asked. and there he was, menance of the hour, squat down beside one of the cats mark was supposed to be watching, giving them a nice pat.

jeno wasn’t supposed to be here. he had read the notification over your shoulder before you had noticed he was even there and went, “oh? sesh at marks tonight?” you didn’t have the heart to tell him he wasn’t invited but chenles look of disapproval when he saw jeno following you into the basement was almost enough to make you wish you did.

in normal scenarios none of you had anything against jeno, in fact you all loved jeno. he was a regular boy next door type, the kind of guy who would change a flat tire for you or tell you that he’s not mad he’s just disappointed if you ever wronged him. mark wanted to add that jeno was also the kind of guy who would respectfully decline a full inclusive trip to florida with someone’s grandmother UNLIKE OTHER PEOPLE HE KNOWS.

but that was all sober jeno. stoned jeno was another story. stoned jeno was scary. and each and every single person in that room was trying to think of a way to get him out of there.

“uhh yeah i think there’s some on the kitchen counter if you want to check,” mark informed jeno on the location of the cat treats and jeno nodded, he stood up and brushed off his knees with a small smile.

“you coming with me, baby?” jeno asked the cat who promptly ignored him and licked at its paws but when he began to walk back upstairs the cat followed after him.

as soon as the door shut behind them, you all looked up at eachother.

“do we lock it?” chenle asked, and you can see everyone silently consider the option. would it be rude to lock jeno upstairs? probably. would it save you a lot of trouble that night? definitely.

“no, that would be mean,” jisung frowned and placed his hands beneath his thighs, leaning forward, much to renjuns discontent.

“who cares about being mean?” donghyuck fought back, “this is a matter of survival, life or death.”

“don’t be dramatic,” you rolled your eyes but that turned the entire room against you, you should have stayed quiet.

“how can you even-“ donghyuck paused and closed his eyes, taking a breath to calm himself, “i cant believe you brought him here.”

“he saw the notification! what else was i supposed to do?“ you whisper yelled and before an eruption of voices could respond chenle cut them off.

“we don’t have time to argue about this, he’ll be back any second,” chenle reminded, “rock, paper, scissors. who ever wins gets to choose what we do.”

the basement unanimously agreed this was a good call. it went on 4 rounds until donghyuck won.

“we lock him out,” donghyuck decided without hesitation.

“go do it then,” mark nudged him, trying to get him off the couch but he didnt budge.

“me?” donghyuck looked scandalized, hugging a needlepoint cushion to his chest, “you do it, you’re closer.”

“barely?!”

“i don’t want to be the bad guy!”

“but you are!”

the basement door opened and jeno returned, catless, “sorry i took forever, there’s four whole cats up there, also! i grabbed a lighter, i wasn’t sure if we had one but we do now-“ jeno stopped on the steps, noticing everyone staring at him (minus donghyuck who was groaning into the cushion he had his face buried in), “what were you guys talking about?” he tilted his head slightly to the side.

so much for that plan.

no one could tell him, that was for sure. you could almost image the puppy ears flattening on his head, he wouldn’t let it go for weeks, maybe months.

“nothing,” you eventually sighed to break the uncomfortable silence, gesturing with your hand for him to come over to where you were sitting. when he was close enough you grabbed his hand in your own giving it a little squeeze and he smiled down at you, standing between your spread legs.

it didn’t really matter what anyone said anyway. unbeknownst to everyone else, jeno had taken an edible about 30 minutes prior so he was basically a ticking time bomb. you could already notice the increased drag of his feet and the droop of his eyelids, it wouldn’t be much longer.

“are we doing this or what?” chenle complained, “i’ve gotta pass out by 1 so i can be up in time for my shift tomorrow.”

things were tense between mark and jeno, at least according to jeno. he was sat cross legged across from mark, tapping at his phone with his entire hand, which was covered almost entirely by his hoodie sleeve.

you received a sophistically written ‘he’s so mean >:( mark lee‘ promptly 5 minutes after jeno had started typing.

‘be nice’ you responded and he squinted his eyes at the bubble that popped up. he scrunched up his face with a pout and held the screen an inch away from his face with both hands trying to read the message without his tunnel vision blurring it for him.

“cant focus?” you giggled beside him, knocking your head against his shoulder as he shook his head, “poor pup.”

jeno’s one sided beef with mark had started a month ago. the last time the two had gotten high together he had managed to convince himself that mark and donghyuck had gotten married without informing him because of their matching surnames. no matter how many time mark fought back, jeno didn’t believe him. he had even given him the cold shoulder in return for not being chosen as marks best man.

the fact that donghyuck had been currently leaning on marks shoulder had further cemented this betrayal in jeno’s mind, or at least what was left of it.

“stop pouting at me,” donghyuck complained, “we’ll invite you to the next one.”

“shut up,” mark whined as jeno’s pout grew 10 fold. he knocked donghyuck’s head off his shoulder but smiled as soon as they made eye contact.

no one was sure what was going on between them but everyone knew that there was something. mostly because donghyuck had changed his facebook relationship status from ‘single’ to ‘its complicated’ and “accidently” sent a link to his account in the groupchat so mark would see. everyone, including mark, could see through it because the only other signs of life on his account where the yearly “happy birthday” posts he made for his rich aunt.

if ever asked about it, donghyuck would answer that they were “soulmates” and mark would say that donghyuck was a “pain in the ass.”

“h-help,” jisung hiccuped a sob behind you. you had been trying to ignore chenle’s routine torturing of jisung, knowing renjun would stop it when it went too far but it would be rude to ignore jisungs calls any longer.

you glanced over you shoulder to see chenle’s hands held flat in the air miming like the other was stuck in a box. chenle was mouthing words but no sounds were coming out which heightened jisungs anxiety even further. he knocked his fists against the fake air box he was stuck in and sobbed further when they halted mid swing as if there actually was a wall there.

when jisung’s eyes caught your own and he sent a plea of help you gave him a look of confusion and mouthed back wordlessly. was it a bit of a dick move? yes. but was it funny? kinda.

“pleASE,” jisung sobbed, “i have a family, i have a-“ his words squeaked off. this was enough to convince renjun that anymore teasing would have given jisung a lifetime of therapy bills.

he got up from the couch and picked up his imaginary hammer, smashing the imaginary box, freeing jisung from his prison. jisung instantly fell into his arms and sniffled into renjuns shoulder as chenle maniacally giggled.

“it’s okay ji,” renjun cooed, patting jisungs back, “let’s get you some more weed to calm you down.”

“i want ikea meatballs,” renjun said looking around waiting for someone else to acknowledge him, “does anyone else really want ikea meatballs right now?”

“fuck off, be quiet,” chenle grumbled from the couch, his feet kicked up on the table, a bucket hat pulled down over his eyes.

“ikea…” jisung repeated to himself bouncing his legs so fast he swore the whole room was shaking.

the room wasn’t shaking. in fact, jeno felt quite stable. he was a big fan of gravity he must admit, it was very comfortable, like a big everywhere blanket covering him.

jeno always claimed weed barely worked on him, it just “mellowed him out.” half of that was true. when jeno was high he lived deep inside of his mind, a scary place to everyone but himself. though he sat there unmoving, eyes closed, mouth hanging open slightly in a permanent pout, his mind was racing.

donghyuck feared him especially. one fateful night left jeno dramatically winking at him everytime they passed a cop. donghyuck had always been too afraid to ask what jeno thinks he did. he’d rather live in ignorance but he knows one day it’s gonna get him in deep shit.

“how many coins do you think we can fit in his mouth today?” mark asked looking at jeno’s open mouth intently. jeno didn’t show any sign that he had heard.

donghyuck hummed and got a closer look at jeno’s face. he moved around him to inspect every angle, jeno didn’t move, “i think atleast 25,” donghyuck answered.

you snapped in front of jeno’s eyes and he didn’t react, at first. about 30 seconds later he blinked and recoiled at the action before quickly settling back into place, “40,” you answered.

“i’ll get my grandmothers penny collection,” mark said, getting up to grab the 3 peanut jars full of coins his grandma had stored in an old chest.

mark placed the coin jars in front of you and you scooted in front of jeno, waiting for him to acknowledge your presence. he doesn’t.

“hey jen,” you smiled softly as you poured some coins into your hand, “can you open your mouth a bit more for me?”

he looked at you blankly for a couple seconds before he followed your instructions. you smiled and ruffled his hair with your free hand and he leaned into your touch.

you held a coin up to his mouth and he let you slide it in without any resistance.

“one,” you counted and placed another coin on his tongue.

by 15 donghyuck had fallen over into marks lap, unable to hold himself up as he uncontrollably cackled at the number of coins jeno had yet to acknowledge in his mouth.

at 28 jeno’s face scrunched up, a confused look on his brows. everyone held their breath. jeno settled back into his blank stare. you placed another coin in his mouth.

you placed the 43rd coin in jeno’s mouth and he glared. he shook his head like a dog trying to get water out of fur and watched as a coin fell out of his mouth and pinged against the floor.

“bleh,” jeno stuck his tongue out and shook his head again, letting all 43 coins tumble out his mouth. he looked at the scattered coins in confusion like he had no idea where they had come from. the crowd cheered, all proud you were able to beat your record of 29.

even after the coin removal his mouth hung open. god, he looked dumb. you placed a hand on his cheek and pat it softly, placing a thumb on his lips and leveraging his mouth open wider. you slip your thumb completely in his mouth and place it atop his tongue when he followed your guidance.

he stared at you without a thought behind his eyes.

“good boy,” you hummed and he perked up, the corners of his lips twitched up, looking love drunk.

you ran your thumb along the inside of his gums and his tongue followed along. his mouth was almost completely dry, you didn’t know if his cotton mouth was from the coins or the weed.

you ran your finger along his teeth and gums trying to see what would make his squirm, eventually you settled on his tongue. you press down on it, your other fingers beneath his chin, holding him in place.

you drill holes into jeno with your eyes watching for his next move.

he reached out to paw at your thighs but you tut as soon as contact is made, “hands to yourself,” you cooed patronizingly, pressing down harder on his tongue. he pulled his hands back and placed them politely in his lap.

you keep your thumb in place but nothing happens.“dumb dog,” you frowned.

he shrunk down, to the best of his ability, struggling to move with your hand holding his head in place. his imaginary puppy ears pressed flat against his head.

“cant even drool right,” you rolled your eyes and moved your thumb back just slightly, he chased it with his tongue and you lock it behind his teeth pulling him forward.

he’s tugged along easily and your finger pulled out of his mouth, your hand moved to stroke his cheek. your teeth clashed with the force of the kiss and you laughed pulling back to kiss him again gently. jeno loses the ability to kiss when he’s high, his lips leave his control and his mouth falls open all sloppy and desperate.

he tasted like metal and it’s kind of fucking gross but it’s also a little hot and doesn’t stop you from taking advantage of the mess of jeno in front of you.

you pulled away and he chased you again, managing to catch you in another short kiss before you pushed him back gently by his shoulders.

“my turn,” haechan sang and pushed himself past you and infront of jeno.

mark hands were folded together in front of him, his jaw clenched and his eyes watched the two of them like a hawk, “i would like to see it.”

jeno pushed donghyuck away as soon as he gets close and holds his hands out in front of him asking for you to sit with him again. donghyuck winced dramatically and fell to the floor, he layed flat and stoped moving entirely, you later find out he fell asleep. jeno completely ignored him.

“open wide for me again pup,” you said, sliding yourself back in front of him and hold a water bottle up to his mouth. he followed your instructions, albeit delayed, and you gave him a pat on the cheek.

water ran down jeno’s face, he struggled to swallow it as you poured it into his mouth. when the stream of water reached his neck you placed the bottle down and he didn’t move to wipe the water off of his face.

as the water began to slide below his hoodie you catch it with your tongue, lick up his neck and chin before reaching his lips and drink up the remaining water inside of his mouth.

his mouth is wide and giving but it’s not enough. the fingers of both of your hands reached around and squeezed lightly, he gasped, his jaw dropping further.

he doesn’t know how he’s supposed to move his lips to follow yours and it’s endearing the way he misses and kisses at your cheeks and chin.

you slide your hands back, they grazed the ends of his long strands of hair that you had been begging him to grow up. you twirled your fingers around tufts of his hair, your hand travelled up until it was able to grab a large chunk.

you tugged and he got pulled back with a whimper. his eyes were glassy and empty but his soft sounds of pain show he’s still there despite how pliantly he allowed you to move him around and angle his head to kiss you better.

you pulled even harder and he bares his neck, allowing you to messily mouth at it and tease gently with your teeth, your grip didn’t loosen on his hair.

“god you’re useless aren’t you puppy,” you cooed and he whimpered, though you were sure it was only from the pain, his thoughts being too jumbled and far away to understand anything but your tone of voice. you decided to pull harder one more time just for good measure.

you loved how he just sat there and took it.

jeno pat jisung on the back when he saw him the next day. jisung jumped, startled and jeno laughed.

“crazy night last night wasn’t it?” jeno asked with a wink and jisung nervously laughed.

“huh?” jisung asked as jeno rubbed at his arm pulling him into a side hug.

“like crazy, crazy. congrats dude, i’m proud of you for real.”

‘proud… of me…?’ jisung froze.

“being a father this young isn’t an easy job but i know you’re up to the job.”

‘oh my god,’ jisung felt his soul leave his body, wanting to fall to his knees in agony, ‘not a-fucking-gain’

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promotional-dvd · 3 years ago

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Why Aaron Hotchner Is The Perfect Dilf

Some may say my statement is bold because men like Chris Evans, Henry Cavill and Jon Bernthal exist, but I say Aaron Hotchner beats them all in terms of looks, personality and overall dilfiness. There is a certain criteria you need to fulfil in order to be considered a dilf. You must be:

Aged between 37-65 (anything older is a Gilf)

Dress for their age - e.g cable knit sweaters, polo shirts and clothes fathers/older men often wear

Needs wrinkles

Have a seemingly mean, intimidating or grumpy exterior but be cuddly and warm

They must partake in some kind of old man activity such as Golf or Tennis

They need children or at least be aiming to have kids in the future

I'd like to start by discussing Hotch’s appearance. He's 6’2 with black hair and has a fairly muscular build but not overly muscular more so bordering on a dad bod. All of these elements combine to create a dream. I would like to draw attention to his eyebrows. As stated in the criteria, having a seemingly intimidating presence is very important and Aaron Hotchner does it so well. His eyebrows fully create the desired look and appeal with how they are constantly furrowed in anger and how his face rarely changes from its grumpy state. Furthermore, his deep voice strengthens the intimidation as in 95% of all dangerous situations he's in he remains calm which can cause the people around him to feel small and weak and pathetic. Hotch also wears a suit a majority of the time which creates a sense of professionalism and superiority. However, he fulfils this point on the criteria due to his sentimental and cuddly nature he keeps behind his serious and dark persona. We are most often shown it when he's with his son Jack. He is shown to be one of the most caring members of the team and is constantly looking out for everyone and looking hot while doing it. He also keeps and maintains his body hair which gives him an extra dose of dad bodness.

Thomas Gibson was 43 when Criminal Minds began and was 53 when he eventually left the show in season 12. These ages are peak dilf and we get to experience all of them throughout the long running crime show. As the show goes on he develops more wrinkles around his eyes and forehead where the best dilfs possess them.

In one episode, he returns with a beard and let me tell you, it is the most amazing and sexy thing I have ever witnessed. His dilfiness went through the roof and I couldn't believe it. It felt like heaven. His dress sense also fits perfectly into the criteria and throughout the show he wears many dilfy outfits. He most often wears a black fleece shirt/jacket or a polo shirt of varying colours. These items of clothing accentuate his dilfiness as they are common items amongst older men and create a sense of comfort and relaxation. Sometimes he wears a dress shirt with 1-3 buttons undone when solving cases in a hot climate which makes him that much more attractive. Also, he wears tan pants on many occasions which cement his dilfiness as they are a crime to fashion and old men do not care about looks only about comfort. The underwear that he wears also shows his age as they are loose blue striped boxers which in the media are commonly shown on old men with younger men leaning towards tight fitting Calvin Klein boxers or briefs.

As previously mentioned, Hotch is a single father to his son Jack after his ex-wife haley was murdered in season 5 episode 9 by the Reaper, a serial killer Aaron had been tracking for years. Being a single father increases an individual's dilfiness tenfold as it shows he is capable and smart and makes him an official Dilf as he is actually father. Looking deeper into Hotch's personal life, his favourite band is the Beatles of which Rossi rightly mocks him for. Typically, only old men and gay people like the Beatles.

In conclusion, Aaron Hotchner is the most perfectly written Dilf to have ever graced my eyes. He has the looks and the personality that align perfectly with the Dilf criteria and it makes me insane. So Aaron Hotchner is the perfect man and you can argue with the wall. Thanks and Bye.

#aaron hotchner #thomas gibson #criminal minds #dave rossi #i spent way too much time on this #just sharing #my thoughts

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joujouyn · 2 years ago

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JOSEPH (prt 3) x Fem!READER🇺🇸🧣

PART 3 AND 4 SPOILERS‼️‼️‼️

POV: you confront gilf Joseph about something👿😡🤬

Joseph’s so real for this🥺🥺 some angst to comfort for u my babies🥹🥹

Tw: None☺️ maybe slightly angsty😡

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luvmxmh · 2 years ago

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dad fit meets grandmacore

ADRIAN APPRECIATION WEEK

Day 2: favorite outfit / fake dating

Pairing: Adrian Chase/Reader

Disclaimers: gender-neutral reader but is described with traditionally-feminine clothing, a police officer interrupts adrian and reader making out

Word Count: 1.8k

Summary:

“—can you call me Adrian now?”

You blink, trying to reorient yourself for a second. How in the Vigilante logic did the pain not register for him?

You know what? Fuck this.

Grabbing him by his collar, you kiss him intensely.

“Sure thing Adrian.” is the last thing you say to him before making your way out of the car.

Is your life a goddamn sitcom?

Author's Note: i have accepted the fact that i can never be punctual a day in my life (unfortunately). so um i'll be double posting day 2 & 3 within today and day 4 a little more later than that

Cross-posted on AO3

Black ops meetings often mean you have to dress professionally—or as professional as you can get without drawing attention from other civilians.

It’s not exactly an inconvenience to you. You’re a bit on the meticulous side of things when it comes to conjuring an outfit of the day. But it does feel like a two-person household whenever you assess your closet.

On one end of the rack, there are clothes dark enough to be worn by Harcourt. They’re your go-to for whatever the hell ARGUS assigns you to. That is, unless they’re sending you undercover.

Then here’s the clothes you wear that made some kids from your block call you… grandma.

You really shouldn’t get agitated over this. These are the stuff you like to wear off-mission. So what? It was either this, or vintage housewife—which you’re actually relatively impartial about. At first you thought it would be funny to wear your grandmother’s hand-me-downs, then you realized how comfortable you felt in them and that fanaticism for old people-esque clothes spiraled from there.

You’re glad the team never hangs out at Fennel Fields anymore. Their penne is gamey and you can’t risk being associated with Chase at his other job. The only exception might be Peacemaker, who’s known to be the object of Chase’s shameless admiration.

You’re quite glad you hang out with a posse of weirdos, because you don’t think anyone else will tolerate a thirty-something year old hanging around the block in what looks like some Golden Girl cosplay. You’re the agent usually sent for infiltration missions, so it’s ironic and you like it.

“Do they always look this suspicious in casual wear?”

Speak of the devil.

“No, Leota.” You sit down between her and Economos, “I’m just fifty-years-old.”

Economos sighs, “Yeah that’s just how they dress outside missions.”

“I don’t think even young grandmas look this young!” Smith exclaims, his gloved hand referring to you as you remove your sunglasses. It’s not even that dark out, but you went with it because summer solstice basically chose your outfit consisting of a floral head scarf, a cardigan over a button-up and long, breezy skirt. It just made sense to you to wear it today, tripping over air aside.

“I was half-expecting you to show up in clogs,” Harcourt quips.

Okay, wow.

“So I’m resident grandma now?” You grumble. You don’t want to admit you did almost wear clogs because you couldn’t find your more comfortable doll shoes from the rest. “Don’t answer that. It’s rhetorical.”

“I think you look great,” Chase says to you from across the booth, “If I were a grandma I’d think you’re super fashionable.”

Smith scoffs and elbows him, “Stop sucking up to them, dude. You look like a single father who’s sworn to only go after cougars now.”

“I’m not! And I don’t! I’m bisexual and I don’t discriminate against gender, race and even age. Hypothetically, if I was a GILF hunter, I would proudly say it.”

“I appreciate the compliment Chase, but never say GILF ever again.” You sigh.

Adebayo nods in agreement and resignation while Economos already has his face in his hands.

Harcourt rolls her eyes, “Okay guys, that’s enough.”

It doesn’t take long for your group to get comfortable (if they weren’t already) as your meals get served. Dinner is as mundane as usual; it’s probably to offset all the other non-civilian shit you do on (mostly) weekdays.

The restaurant sends a waitress to politely kick you out once they’re nearing closing time. Adebayo and Harcourt carpooled here together while Economos, Adrian and Smith have their own cars.

It’s too late into the night to catch a bus ride, and you’re certain your feet will kill you if you walk. You really should’ve biked your way here. You spot Chase fiddling with his pockets

“Hey,” you say when you approach him, “Is it okay if I tag along with? I don’t have a ride home, and I’m too anxious to wait at any of the stops here.”

“Oh, sure I don’t mind. Just—just hold on a sec.”

It’s your usual summer night, and you’re glad most of what you’re wearing right now are modestly appropriate for the chill. You lean back to Chase’s car, trying not to imagine what his muscles look like beneath his wool sweater.

“You look like a Golden Girl, you know.”

For effect, you try to pose like they did. Unfortunately, their signature poses would consist of four people. You aren’t four people in the physical sense, but right now you don’t think undercover identities could be relevant to the conversation.

“Is this a good enough impression.”

He blinks and you quickly drop the dramatic stance. How embarrassing. You pretend to rummage around the messenger bag you’ve slung on your shoulder. Not in a across-the-body type of sling of course, lest it disrupts your aesthetic.

You didn’t even confirm if he’s watched Golden Girls. Goddamnit. You try not to remember how strangely you’ve inflected the word ‘impression’. Goddamnit. Oh man. Goddamnit.

“Sorry, um. Forget I did that.”

As if on cue, he grins at you brightly, like you actually made him forget on command. What weirdos, the both of you.

“Well, I think you look cute. Even for a grandma.”

“You look great yourself,” you say, scanning his outfit, “Dad.”

He looks down at his shirt-sweater combo before looking back up to you, “Do I really look like a dad?”

“You kind of stand like one too.”

“I’m not posing.”

You laugh. “Scared you’ll embarrass yourself like I did?”

“Yes to the first half and no to the other half,” he says, “I don’t think it was embarrassing. Maybe a bit awkward for your angles, though.”

Once he finally finds his keys he opens the car door for you and you attempt to get in as gracefully as you can manage with your skirt on.

This would be the first time you have been inside Chase’s Sebring. “Your bat-mobile’s nice.”

“Dude.” He looks at you incredulously as he gets into the driver’s seat. “It’s the Vigilante-mobile.”

You shrug, “Same difference.”

“I don’t know what made you think that, or what even was your thought process behind that, but—”

Throughout the ride he gets into multiple tangents from what you started the conversation with. You can’t exactly complain. His enthusiasm rubs off on you, magnified by the jazz playing on the radio when he put a DVD in.

It dawns to you how little you feel the time has passed when Chase parks by the curb to your apartment building..

“So… this is your stop.”

“I know where my house is, Chase,” you chuckle. “Nervous that the night’s ending?”

From what you could distinguish from his expression, he seems disappointed. His gaze remains fixed at the road, and you wish he would at least look at you as you take your leave. “Honestly, kinda. You’ve been great company.”

They orange glow of the nearby lamp post and the harsh shine of the moonlight paints a pretty picture on his face. Or maybe he’s just really handsome, you honestly can’t tell.

There’s a feeling in your chest that compels you to move closer to him—a leap of faith—, a tentative something that just feels right.

Just as you lean forward to press a chaste kiss on his cheek, he turns his head to you.

Chase looks as surprised as you feel. You probably look like a duck from his perspective right now.

You break the accidental lip-lock, ready to apologize when he dives in straight for your lips. He’s intense, probably out of practice but the way he’s holding down your thigh and your face right now is oh my god—

You wrap your arms around his neck, desperate to feel him closer. He caresses the space between your ear and your jawline as he cradles your face in his palms. It almost feels too intimate, like you’re rushing into this but you lost all care in the world when he kisses you with such fervor you forgot this isn’t what you’ve planned for,

Chase pulls away to catch his breath. You can’t say you blame him, but his flustered face leaves you breathless in a different sort of way.

“I’ve been—”

A series of knocks interrupt him, catching both of you off-guard. You look behind him to see a police officer. Motherfucker.

Even through the window, his voice is audible. “My God, what are you kids doing in there?”

Oh, holy shit.

“It’s alright officer, we're divorced.”

After that awkward confrontation with the officer, it leaves you in a weird limbo of a situation with Chase.

“So what do we—”

“Hey, I think I’ve liked you—”

“You what?”

Chase does this weird thing with his lips where it scrunches along his nose. It’s strange but you wait for him to say his piece.

“I think I’ve liked you for a while and I just wanted to let you know that. I know I’m not the best at expressing my emotions but you just… bring it out of me.”

“... seriously?”

“If I was being sarcastic, I think I would say it.”

You stare at him in astonishment, so he proceeds to say, “I was about to ask you earlier if we could hang out, just the two of us this time. Then that cop just had to show up to ruin the mood—”

“I’d love to!” you say, more enthusiastically than expected, “I mean, yeah. I’d love to.”

“Okay,” he nods. “Okay. Okay. That’s more than great.”

You place a hand on his shoulder, preparing to lean in to kiss his cheek— for real this time—as a way to say goodnight.

“Oh, and one last thing—!”

The first time, it sent your mind reeling because of how romantic (albeit a bit dubious descriptor you have to admit) it was. The second time he accidentally fucking headbutts you.

“—can you call me Adrian now?”

You blink, trying to reorient yourself for a second. Is his head made out of stone? How in the Vigilante logic did the pain not register for him?

You know what? Fuck this.

Grabbing him by his collar, you kiss him intensely before making your way out of the car.

“Sure thing Adrian!”

Is your life a goddamn sitcom?

You flop on top of your comforter (“—ow!”), burying your face in them. It’s not even past eight yet but you feel exhausted already.

Adrian’s (Oh my goodness, Adrian. That’s half of his government name that you could say now) probably still driving to his place. You hope he’s touching his lips, thinking about yours, like some rom-com scene.

Sitting back against your pillows, you put on your bifocals to continue your progress in candy crush, using solely your index finger to move the colorful candies. For all your denial, you do act like a grandma. And for the sake of fashion stereotypes (and your amusement), you hope Adrian acts a little like a dad too.

#acweek22 #my writing #peacemaker #adrian chase #adrian chase/reader #adrian chase x reader #vigilante/reader #vigilante x reader

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ryozoro · 3 years ago

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Hades Playlist - ii.

NOW PLAYING: Vampire [Dominic Fike]

cw; nothing really, very small mentions of manipulation and murder

an: SORRY FOR THE LATE UPLOAD , THINGS GOT BEHIND SCHEDULE :(

“The curious are always in some danger. If you are curious, you might never come home.” – Jennette Winterson

She couldn’t get him off her mind; ever since she met him, all her thoughts have led back to the droopy eyes and the slick back hair that seemed a lot softer than what the gel presented it as. The whole idea of her thoughts tracing back to the eldest of the Haitani’s and her heart beats mimicking each time the octave of his voice dropped with every word he spoke to her, made yn almost forget all the rules her big brother placed when it comes to men.

Why does she yearn to be in the presence of someone who would not hesitate to take her life for a laugh amongst his gang? Why does she want to run into the back allies of each street in hopes of accidentally bumping into him? Why isn’t she able to use common sense and erase the memory of him out of her head? Why does she feel like fate has strung their paths together on purpose? Why – you know what? Maybe she latched onto Ran so fast in hopes of forgetting someone else that continued to plague her mind daily. Maybe she is becoming obsessed with idea of someone not seeing her as a kid. That has to be it, right? Ran, ‘Tani-Senpai,’ shares the same interest and even wants to talk to her later as if they have been old friends. That has to be it —

“Yn!” her brother’s voice snapped her out of her thoughts. “Are you okay, ya idiot?” She took note that everyone at the table was staring at her, waiting for her to answer Draken’s question. “You’ve been spacing out since we got here,” Draken frowned as he plucked a piece of food from her plate, “are you sure that nothing happened on your bike ride to the shop?”

“If you were riding to the shop, I would have gladly picked you up,” Inupi chimed in with a soft smile. “I told you to treat me like I’m another older brother.”

“Hm,” yn hummed while avoiding eye contact with the blonde man, “wanted to surprise my troll of a brother and I figured you were off because its Tuesday.”

“Ah,” Inupi gently laughed as he watched her play with her food, “you remembered my schedule?”

Of course, she remembered his schedule. Yn knew almost everything about him; from the origins of his beautiful burn mark to his favorite snack in the vending machine back at the shop, yn knew and fell in love with it all. Draken always teased her about being in love with Mikey or Hakkai since she always seemed relaxed around them, but little did he know that his little sister was in love with his best friend and business partner.

“I’m honestly shocked that you kept it the way you did,” yn side-eyed him as she raised the other hand to pick at the bandages that wrapped along the underside of her jaw, “but at the same time, I’m not that shocked considering old people love to stick to their schedules. Wouldn’t want you straining your back, Oji-chan.”

Inupi laughed – God, she loved that laugh - whole heartedly to the point he began choking on his food. Of course, sitting with their friends and family, Inupi’s contagious laugh spread amongst the others and the people around them either ignored it very well or gave them silent glares in hopes they would stop; surprise, they did not. Hell, if anything, it got worse – so much worse – to the point that Mikey, Takemichi, and Chifuyu all fell out of their chairs.

“I – what did I say that was so funny?” yn pouted as she fished her phone out of her pocket, “I just called him the old man he was.”

“That’s why, brat,” draken flicked her forehead and chuckled, “we had made a few bets on what you would say when Inupi had talked to you. Surprisingly, Mitsuya guessed you would have called him a grandpa.” Draken and the others proceeded to give Mana’s big brother 200 yen as they got up off the floor and calmed down.

“So, Yn,” Takemichi looked her in the eyes with a dopey flushed face.

“Watch it ‘ Mitchy,” Kazutora playfully warned, “don’t wanna embarrass the poor girl since she just got back.”

“What is it, crybaby,” she asked hesitantly as she scanned over his face, noting signs of mischief lurking in the corners of his smile. “It better not be something stupid, or else I’m telling Hina-san about what you did last time you came over to the shop.”

“Oi, you’re so mean – just like your brother,” Takemichi pouts and fans his hands towards you, “but it’s just a simple question, neh.”

Yn enjoyed Takemichi’s presence more than someone from an outside point of view would have thought. He always served as a hero in her eyes as he saved Mikey from the dark path he began to walk and how he constantly reminded her brother on how much his deceased lover, Sano Emma, watches over him and guides him to all the good things that happens in his life. He was an amazing guy and one that she wished had set her expectations for her taste in men, but her heart yearns for those who are completely out of her grasp.

“Just ask or else I’m calling Hina-san,” yn smirked as she brought her phone screen into view for Takemichi to see that “Hina-san <3” contact was pulled up and only one press away from being dialed.

“Oh, you bully!” Takemichi sighed dramatically, “I was just going to ask how long you have been into gilfs?” Draken choked on his drink and Pah-chin was patting his back in hopes of easing the rough coughs. Everyone at the table began to cause even more ruckus with tears of laughter as yn sat there dumbfounded.

“w-what,” she scratched her head and looked around the table in hopes of someone taking note of her clear ignorance at the word that Takemichi had claimed her to be attracted to. Since no one answered, she decided to speak on her own, “what the hell is a gilf?” Much to yn’s dismay, the table went silent for a brief second before bursting out into an even louder fit of laughter. “Well?! What the hell is it?”

“Yn, love,” Smiley spoke between hiccups and giggles, “it’s the same thing as a Dilf or Milf, but for old people.” After he finally finished his sentence, he leaned against his twin and laughed even harder.

“I-,” yn stood up and threw her dirtied napkin and spoon at the man who made the joke, “I’m not attracted to gilfs you fuckin idiot.” Yn moved behind Takemichi and put him in a headlock, “what made you even think to say that ya CD sellin’ pervert.”

“Oi,” Draken said from above her, “let ‘Mitchy go or else I’m taking you back all the way to Fukurodani and asking them to volunteer you for the summer school tutoring.” Yn dropped her arms in defeat and made her way back to her seat. “And you,” Takemichi looked up at her brother with a teary-eyed smile, “go clean your hair up before your wedding. It’s in three days and anyone can tell you pick at your split ends during your down time at work.” Draken laughed as Takemichi’s expression turned into a pout and he began punching Draken’s solid abdomen.

“Oh,” Angry stood up abruptly, “yn, could I see ya outside really quick?” Despite his rough tone, everyone knew he was asking in the kindest way possible.

“Yeah, sure,” yn got up with a pout and made her way to the exit with Angry trailing her with a hand on her mid-back. She was confused as to why they went outside at such a fast pace, but she just assumed that Angry wanted peace and quiet away from the others. “So,” yn smiled at the younger twin, “what did you – why is your face angrier than usual?” She titled her head at the man but he was quick to grab her hand and guide her towards his bike.

“Hop on,” he straddled the seat and waited for her to do the same, “don’t worry, Draken texted me to take you back to me and Nahoya-nii’s shop. So… hurry up, please.” Souta stopped her right before she got on and placed a helmet on her head, “safety first because I’ll hurt you if you get hurt,” he said as he proceeded to adjust the straps enough to keep her safe and comfortable. “Get on, Princess,” he kicked up the kick stand and took off fast out the parking spot.

“So – uh,” yn spoke aloud as they arrived at a stop light, “why did nii-chan tell ya to take me to the shop… I wasn’t done eating.” She felt her stomach rumble and she pressed her cheek to Angry’s leather cladded shoulder blade and readjusted her grip on his waist as they began moving towards the backroads to get to the Kawata’s Ramen shop.

“I’ll make you a bowl when we get there,” he relaxed his upper body so yn wasn’t laying against hard muscles, “and we left because everyone kept staring at you.”

“Psh,” yn rolled her eyes, “they were staring because I am a strong, independent woman who managed to put a MAN in a headlock like a bad bi-.”

“Enough of your ‘bad bitch’ talk, I believe you, but I promise you that was not the reason.” Angry spoke through a breathy laugh, “the cook and the table in the corner was kept looking over you. Don’t you think it was weird how when they brought our orders out and Draken said your rice was missing an egg and the cook came out and apologized himself?”

Yn pondered on the question for a bit but then shook her head gently and nuzzled inbetween the center of Angrys’s back, “no, to be honest, I thought that the cook just hates when he messes up. It can’t be that deep, yanno? Oh! Maybe they mistook me as an idol?” She felts Angry’s laugh bubble from his chest to his shoulder blades; Souta’s laugh honestly made her feel like her jokes were genuinely funny to listen to.

“Hate to break it to you,” Angry brought the bike to a gentle stop as the arrived towards the ramen shop, “but you don’t present yourself as the ideal image of the idol you probably think you are.” Yn joined Souta in the small fits of laughter as she gently punched him in his side.

“Oh, shut up,” she let out a soft breath as she hopped off and carried the helmet with her as she made her way to the employee back door. “Open up, yeah? ‘M reeeeeally hungry.”

“Already ahead of you, ya dumb brat,” Angry bumped his hip gently against yn’s and unlocked the door and pushed her inside. They placed their helmets and jackets off in the staff room and made their way towards the kitchen where she sat at bar stools and Angry started up the stove to boil a few eggs and moved to chop up some green onions. “You want beef or chicken, idiot?”

“Sheesh, souta-kun, if ya wanted to marry me – just say that,” Yn teased as she propped her head onto her two hands, “your terms of endearment have been getting sweeter and sweeter by the minute~ but! I do want chicken please, been not feelin like eating cow and pigs lately.”

“Yer annoying,” angry threw a small, chopped onion at her, “in your dreams I’d marry you. Plus, I KNOW I’m not your type. You go for mechanics with burn marked boys that work with your brother -,”

“OKAY, NOT NEEDED,” Yn pressed her face to the counter, “asshole… He’s my type, but I’m not his. He’s like, Makima and I’m Denji… please tell me you understand that because it’s the best I got.”

“I understand it, and I just want to say that that is the most tragic thing I have heard from you in a while – oh, but back to the restaurant,” Angry said as he slid a small chocolate mochi from out the freezer and towards yn on a cute, small plate, “there was a customer who went into the back the second he heard that your order was wrong. I thought it was weird because what cook comes out that frightened when they get someone’s order wrong, but then your brother texted me saying that every man there had their eyes on you as if they were in charge of watching your every move. At first, Hakkai noticed some of the men sporting a ‘Bonten’ tattoo on their wrist, so we thought maybe they were after Mikey, but then Mitsuya texted us when he went to the bathroom that he heard some of the guys saying your name. Once that was said, Draken immediately told me to take you away from there… I do have a question for you though.” Angry began whipping up the ramen in the most tasteful way and side-eyeing the young ryuguji, “did you by chance get into it with a few Bonten member’s when you first got here? Is that why you’re all bandaged up?”

“Souta,” yn felt her heartbeat pick up but remained composed, “nothing happened with what ever ‘Bonten’ members… you know how weird some gangs are…”

“I trust you, brat,” Angry’s frown deepened once he noticed that the eggs were ready to be cut and the chicken was ready to be fried, “I just don’t want to lose another family member, okay? We babies have to stick together.” With that, he paid no mind to the situation, making a small mental note to tell Draken that one of the members there probably just thought yn was pretty. “Oh,” Souta looked back at yn, “one more thing.”

“Y-yeah, of course,” yn snapped her eyes to meet his gaze, nervous that he might have picked up on the fact that she lied about not coming into contact with any members when she first arrived, “what’s up stinky?”

“Just be careful,” Angry passed her a water bottle, “don’t trust anyone who isn’t in our toman family; especially not a Bonten member. He’ll take you in, manipulate you into believing you can’t live without him, and sell you off with no cares in the world. That is, if you’re lucky enough not to be killed in the middle of the street for entertainment.” Souta turned back around to finish up the ramen.

“Yeah,” yn felt a chill go down her back, “I’ll be careful… I promise.” She honestly didn’t know how to feel, after all, she just met with the man who presented her with an unrequited love, another man who made her heart yearn to lurk into the depths of the shadows, and someone whom she considered family just told her that one of those men would lead her onto a road of misfortune. Lost in her thoughts, she felt her phone vibrate in her back pocket. She pulled on it and felt her stomach drop as she was greeted with two notifications.

Draken bacon >:D : You okay kid? We’re heading to the restaurant right now, ‘m sure nothing was wrong – just wanted ya to be safe. me and inupi there in a bit, the other boys are getting stuff together for our dinner tonight. don’t annoy angry too much <3

Tani-senpai <3: why did you leave so soon pretty girl? Didn’t mean to alarm you, but I sent your picture to quite a few of my juniors and underlings, delinquents if you will – just wanted them to know not to touch what isn’t theirs. N e Wayz, I have time now, do you want to call now?

Were the gods telling her to remember her caring brother’s rules on men or to listen to faint voice of curiosity that lingered in her young and ignorant mind?

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