#comfort after a bad day
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I stand with Louis no matter what. If either lestat or armand did that shit to me and people talked about me the way they talk about louis on here and on twitter you're gonna see me in history books
#mad at louis for not giving a fuck about magnus' lair when he was gonna kill lestat mind you he literally starved to death and DIED#not 3 days prior to going to kill lestat. louis explicitly said he was gonna go die with them coven niggas like louis was crashing out#and you mean to tell me hes supposed to give a fuck about their trauma at this time???????#girl fuck you. and your bald headed mammy i wish somebody would say that shit to me after they killed my kid#gaslighting and beating me and leaving me to die and they wanna say i should be nicer fuck you#i have to comfort the nigga who drove me to attempt after said attempt when writhing in agony but im the bad guy#cus i was a pimp a century ago go to the deepest pits of hell#and the pimp stuff is crazy cus none of what louis did as a pimp had a relationship to how he acted with his partners bc they had more power#in both relationships louis is powerless. jim crow Louisiana gay married to a white man and stuck in dubai with a 500 year old demon#who routinely gaslights and emotionally abuses him#louis pimping out women has an effect on his relationships to WOMEN. specifically black women. not them lil 2 pump ass niggas he was fucking#yall piss me off so bad yall really vex me at times#iwtv#interview with the vampire#louis de pointe du lac#ldpdl#loumand#loustat
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look i know the most likely option for why kipperlilly hates riz specifically is that he like has amazing grades and good friends and is one of agueforts faves while like chronically skipping class and breaking the rules (and laws) but i also have 18 stupid ass reasons i wrote down from rewatching s1 that i think are funnier
#i have not stopped thinking about her mentioning him in counseling since we learned ab it clearly#i also wanna know if it was before or after gibbons died caus it would be really fucking funny if it was quite literally the first day#also it’s crazy she felt comfortable talking to jawbone about all that considering the bad kids basically got him the job#thought i think jawbone would very much understand anger issues and feeling unfairly treated in the system ngl#anyways#fhjy spoilers#d20 fhjy#fantasy high#fhjy#kipperlilly copperkettle#riz gukgak#jawbone o'shaughnessey#original overanalyzing
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After the Chicago mission ! (Soap probably asks Ghost to close the curtains after that)
#cod mw2#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#ghostsoap#soapghost#thought of two things :#one : what if soap developped a fear of heights and didn't realise how bad it got until he has to scale a building during a mission#and has a giant panic attack and the others have to find a way around that and it makes him feel like a failure#and two : what if he has abandonment issues and convinced himself that his place in his relationship with ghost was to be funny and goofy#and to comfort him when he feels down and since he was the one that had to be comforted he's now scared that he failed in his role and#that ghost will abandon him for that and after a few days of angst and avoidance he ends up admitting that to ghost after he asks#and ghost tells him that it's not a healthy way to think and they work on that
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I love you guys. I hope you know that.
Like.
Ok so I posted the new TRT chapter the other day. Obviously. And I had to force myself to do it, to click that final, 'post' button because at that last moment, this big wave of imposter syndrome hit (that had already hit on and off as I'd started working on the chapter again). And it was just this cycle of, 'It's been like 6 months since you posted a chapter or anything other than a couple one-shots and you're out of practice, I bet it's bad, it's probably terrible, I bet everyone's left and no one cares about this thing you love so why do you? What if no one likes it, you're gonna drop this and everyone's gonna god 'wtf is this, pasta? what happened?'' And so I forced myself to post it, took my meds to ensure I slept, and then kinda just bunkered down and slept/hid because I was halfway convinced that all the trauma in the previous six months had just bopped any ability I had to write.
Instead I got this outpouring, of just like, 'WELCOME BACK' and people telling me they're happy that mom is ok (which made me cry but in a good way) and they're sorry Cato passed away (more tears, but comforted tears), but also delightful jokes about the funny lines I put in or screaming over that romantic line or about missing Jane and the dynamics and comments about being eager for the next chapter, and how now I can be one of those AO3 authors with those notes of 'yeah my life blew up so I was delayed, but hey I'm back!' which... yeah. And much like when I first started TRT, I didn't... really expect that at all, and it's made me really emotional.
So if you've dropped into my ask box or the comments or the replies, seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you, because the excitement and love and just you all being the best little fam and continuing on this journey of TRT with me - a journey that has now included both Matt and Jane's journey, and a real life journey through a pandemic, a huge move, a passing of two of my pets, my mom's hospitalization and recovery, some heart issues, the cancellation and resurrection of the show, me meeting Charlie Cox and getting him to hold a red thread, my first wood carving event, etc - and I know I say this a lot, but you all really, really help me keep going when things get hard. I'd write TRT for nothing, I would, because I love this story and I intend to see it through, but ya'll just... I love you all tons. I'm hoping to get through the asks and fic comments and replies in the next few days, but I just wanted you guys to know that.
#i cannot understate how much i cried when i woke up and saw all the comments#and then when i posted about the chapter being up and got a bunch of excitement i just like#i was SO convinced i'd lost something after all the bad things and that some part of me had been lost in it#especially writing a chapter without my old kitty who had sat with me through every goddamn chapter#since the day i first sat down to write it#but the reactions have just... they were really comforting#so thank you#the red thread#and now we look forward to so much more <3
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oh the dread, oh the worry! you love your sister so much and you need to know shes okay. you trust her but you cant trust the world, and more than anything else you cant trust yourself
#jrwi riptide#jrwi fanart#jrwi riptide spoilers#jrwi show#gillion tidestrider#edyn tidestrider#RAHHH IVE HAD THIS ROTTIN IN DRAFTS FOR A BIT but im finally here n ready to POST!!!!#SO THE LIL GILLION AND EDYN ARC HUH??#gillion as a character makes me so emotional. he means so well yet sucks so bad in every way he wish he didnt#HE CARES SOO MUCH ABOUT HIS SISTER. MAN HAS NEVER CRIED EXCEPT FOR THE DAY HE SAW HER AGAIN#HE WAS SOOO HAPPY TO SEE HER AND FIND OUT SHES OKAY. I ALSO REMEMBER SCREAAAAMIN WHEN SHE FIRST APPEARED#I HAD BEEN THINKIN ABOUT EDYN FOR SO LONG... ohhh older sisters where u at... u understand... only us older sisters get it#andNOW WHERE IS SHE..? WHERE IS SHE NOW.... working with the navy to 'undo' what the undersea has done to her precious baby brother#OKAY ENOUGH EMOTIONS TIME FOR ME TO TALK ABT MY ART#REAAALLY THIS IS ONE OF MY BEST DOODLE PAGES SO FAR. IM SO PROUDA THE COLORS N THE SCENES AND THE EMOTIONS#the lil scene with edyn comforting gillion after 'a day of alot of failure. that was the first we ever saw of edyn right? i love my colors#A MIRROR! edyn painted in red when shes often blue. framed by rock and coral and memory sharing bracelets and fire.#A MEMORY! a recent event! finding her at the bar and meeting her at a tavern. its cathartic to hear your older sister tell you its okay#even more cathartic to have her remind you that you are not your tragedies. you were just a kid. you didnt deserve what happened.#you really missed having her here#OH BUT THE NEXT. A NOTE LEFT BEHIND. NOTHING ELSE. i love you a million gillion#BUT THATS NOT A REASSURANCE IS IT? its a trust fall. emphasis on the fall. emphasis on the needle in your chest as wind rushes past#you anticipate the ground but you wish you could anticipate her arms. you wish you could trust. you need to trust. so why cant you?#instead you lash out. again. just like last time. just like always. you were never good at controlling your emotions#all you do in the end is break stuff. none of them can trust you. thats why she cant tell you. thats why he didnt tell you. noone trusts yo#chips got way too many damn belts btw. put some o those back boy u do NOT need all that mess jingling around ur gay hips. you FRUIT!!!!!!!!#I liked the scene with jay n chip dragging gillion around. its a comical scene ofc and i LOVE that balance here. but that sadness remains.#they care about gillion so much..... auuwuuuu.....#OKAY FINAL THOUGHTS. I RLY LIKE DRAWING DIFFERENT TEARS FOR DIFFERENT TYPES OF CRYING#when the tears well up so big from uncontainable joy that you cant even see
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Hot chocolate, matcha cake, haikyuu movie, and cuddling my Lilia plush while laying in warm blankets on a cool night is one of my greatest comforts. 🥰☕️🍰
#hanas thoughts#I was looking forward to this 🥳🥳💞💞#I know milk I bad for coughs but shhhh that’s future Hana’s problem lol#I can’t not have hot chocolate I was looking forward to it since today was supposed to be the coldest day of the week#it’s the small comforts that adds up#and I got sleep the last two days after weeks 🥹🥹🥹#so I’ve been sleeping a lot
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Thinking about winter and their physical affection and now literally none of these happen under happy circumstances.
#the second theyre together in their little father daughter unit#it’s immediate proximity and being comfortable with each other#and then it all crashes and burns five days after#but like!! enough that she holds the side of his face trying to figure out what to do to save him!!!#how she holds his hand during winter when it’s an especially bad day and she just wants him home!!!!#HOW HE FINDS HER AFTER DAVID AND IS SCARED AND SHES SCARED AND SHE PUSHES AGAINST HIM BECAUSE SHE THINKS HES ONE OF THEM#BUT THEN HE GRABS HER FACE AND HE SAYS HER NAME AND HE SAYS LOOK AT ME AND HIS HANDS ARE SO GENTLE#BUT SHE KEEPS PUSHING BUT THERES THAT FAMILIAR WARMTH AND FEEL AND SO SHE SEES HIM EYE TO EYE FINALLY#AND HE GUIDES HER TO HIS NECK TO THE FUZZY PART OF HIS COAT AND DOESNT LET GO OF HER FACE TIL SHES SAFE AND SECURE#AND HE WRAPS HIS ARMS AROUND HER BACK AND BEHIND HER NECK AND HERS GO OVER HIS SHOULDERS AND BEHIND HIS NECK#AND HOW SHES COMPLETELY ENCAPSULATED IN HIS EMBRACE BECAUSE SHES SO TINY AND FITS THERE SO WELL BECAUSE THEYRE PUZZLE PIECES#EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY#AND HOW HE’LL PULL HER AWAY AND HOLD HER FACE AND TELL HER HE’LL NEVER LEAVE HER AGAIN#the last of us hbo#tlou spoilers#joel miller#ellie williams#joel and ellie
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people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T
tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3
#tmnt yap in the taggies !!#would you believe me if i said my cat is named after donnie… teehee !! ^_^#i have been a tmnt lover since i was the ripe age of 6 years old SOBSOB#i used to write bf headcanons on wattpad way long ago… thats where my love for writing started i fear…#i probably have more tmnt merch than i do anime merch which is soso crazy to think about PHEW !!!#notebooks cups plushies legos shirts pajamas stickers tins action figs keychains name something and i have it… is that weird… SOB#im not joking when i say i know the entire lore and could explain everything from start to finish… FOR EACH AND EVERY REBOOT EVER…. wowza…#other than rottmnt because i’ve never been a fan of that reboot sigh…#the only reason donatello hamato isnt on my blorbie list is because i do not want to seem out of touch… he used to be there though !! :3#also i love raph too sigh#i fear donnie was my start to my love for nerdy men… raph was for the mean ones… cough cough akaashi and bakugo#tall lanky men… yeah hes a turtle… i know… let me speak… pls… i beg… T^T#tmnt 2012 will always be my star my light my beloved#i can recite every single episode </3 ALSO THE 2014 & 2017 MOVIES DONT GET ME STARTED i have them on dvd :3#i also have the 1990’s movies on dvd teehee theyre sososososoo good T^T my comfort franchise forever and always#i may always speak of anime but just know tmnt will always be the start of it all and my most beloved <3 its everything to me#also i was and still am an avid tmnt 2012 april oneil hater someone get her out of there i loathe her >:/#was never a supa big fan of leo im very sorry… idk who im sorry to… where are my tmnt fans… am i alone in this world… hello… tmnt fans…#omigosh im back after looking at my old wattpad story IM GIGGLING why was the writing kinda good… it was first person though sigh… goodness#i should create my own tmnt yap tag i fear… i will never shut up about it EVER SOBSOBSOB !! i even had a tmnt party when i was younger </3#donnie ( & mikey ) are so misunderstood UGH i could yap about the lore all day. donnie deserved more recognition he was always doing so muc#FOR ALL of his brothers and they never appreciated it… ill cry right now. donnie you will always be famous to me. april doesnt deserve you.#raph and his temper are so misunderstood too like please. always making him the bad guy HE JUST WANTS TO BE A GOOD BROTHER HES JUST AWKWARD#remembering when i had a crush on a guy names joseph in first grade and he liked tmnt too… joseph just know we were soulmates… i promise </#i used to go up to the tv and kiss the screen when donnie showed up. i was like 6 years old tho its okay… still sleep with my stuffie tho.#thank you to my yaya for buying me that when i had the flu hes still in perfect condition SOB donatello i love you so much UGH im crying#‘thats a mutant turtle ew !!’ HE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND LOVEABLE TO ME. YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND EVERYPONY </3 nia reference woah hi nia :3#whos in favor of tmnt. raise your hands up high so i can see them. im giggling. tmnt lovers rise we sha’ll prosper… WE RIDE AT DAWN 🦅🦅🦅#is this like totally crazy of me… has anyone read this far… if you have jusy know i love you. i cherish you. you are my everything <3#₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ — lene’s latest gossip .ᐟ
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Part two of the thing and uuh also final one
Of this interaction. Because this is far from all I can give, my brain almost imploded from all the ideas
#after some very heated talks between the two brothers Vash said he would leave the house for a good time#suggesting they both needed time apart and Vash needed to learn how to live without Kni#very reluctantly Kni agreed (even if he didn’t V would have done it anyways) with the single condition of letting him know the general#details about his livings. the adress. who he was living with if he decided to room with someone and at least their phone number in case#of an emergency. Vash agreed to this and put the limit there bc Kni wanted to know more but he said no I won’t tell you about their life tf#WW who is comfortable living at the orphanage doesn’t find convenient commuting for over 2 hours everyday to get there#so he is looking for a place to stay. Vash mentioned wanting to share a rental home w someone to split the spendings#and so the stars aligned and they were already planning their moving four days after meeting each other#because that’s Vashwood for you#imagine the delight of being either WW or Kni and finding out about each other thanks to Vash again#neither of them want to tell Vash about what they think of each ither. Kni to keep some sort of face and ‘peace’ with his brother#and WW doesn’t want to leave a bad impression saying he was the cause that the brother of the guy he was planning to live with couldn’t see#with his right eye for a whole week. so they hate their guts and Vash doesn’t know the why though he can grasp a general idea.#but he always hits bullseye making both WW and Kni glance at each other silently with their eyes saying#“DID YOU TELL HIM?’’ ‘’DID-YOU-TELL HIM??’’#trigun#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun stampede#vashwood#trigun fanart#vash#wolfwood#nicholas trigun#nai saverem#millions knives#Trigun Uni! AU#lenssi draws
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took myself on a little shopping trip yesterday in the city where i used to study in hopes of lifting my spirits but by the end of the day i felt so disheartened. wandering the same streets 10 years later and not much has changed. i’m still the same lonely unlovable girl.
#i just wanted to have a good time and not rot in bed for once on my work free weekend but of course my brain can’t let that happen#it was such a lovely day actually the weather was sunny and windy it wasn’t too hot or cold ideal weather to stroll through the city#i had delicious food and found some comfortable clothes but at the end of the day i just felt so empty and worn out#seeing all these couples and friend groups and families and i’m still all by myself after so many years#tbh i’m even lonelier now than i was 10 years ago back then i at least had a few friends#idk what i’m doing with my life tbh.. i just want to be happy but even when i take myself on a cute little date i end up feeling miserable#bc it just hits me how truly lonely i am#i fear i’m incapable of forming any genuine relationships anymore bc i had so many bad experiences that i just stopped trying to connect..#with anyone.. even though i crave community friendship companionship and love i completely shut myself off from the world#i’m not even sure what i’m trying to say with all this.. i wish i knew how to be a person in this world#i wish i could be happy#tbh ever since i got back from my italy vacation i’ve been feeling depressed bc life could be so beautiful if i didn’t have to sacrifice..#almost all of my time for work#the post vacation depression is too real…#realizing you can only spend a very limited time traveling and enjoying yourself bc you have to work most of the time just to afford living#let me stop.. i keep rambling and my thoughts are falling like a waterfall#idk what’s wrong with me… i should have breakfast and put my phone away#sorry to anyone who actually reads all this word vomit#☁️
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trying my hand at some post timeskip zolu (somewhere in the aftermath of fish man island's main events) and ugh. I love them so much they're so fun to write
#I just think!!!!! kind of subtly pining zolu after the timeskip is so good. I absorb it like a sponge#tp#my stuff#there's just smth abt knowing someone so intimately and naturally yet being apart from them for so long#the puzzle pieces still fitting together as they did on the first day but the edges being just a little different#and all the feelings that come with that sort of realization. that awareness#it's not a bad thing. just....that urge to relearn each other again. yeah#the comfort of knowing some things remain the same#SIGHHHHS#zolu
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Paul George on Stephen A. Smith’s Kawhi Leonard jab: “I didn’t like that moment… Kawhi wants to play… We exhausted a lot out of Kawhi this season. So at some point your body breaks you down… I didn’t appreciate that moment. I know I laughed because the situation was lighthearted, but deep down it was like you gotta let that go, Stephen A.”
Paul George, knight in shining armor
#HE DOES . u know. defend his girlbosses#as a good malewife husband soes#but like... he'll defend them.. five days after the fact#like hes just zoned out during the actual time of necessary defense#thinking about what new gaming chair to buy for himself whilst squinting harshly#i think tauruses and caps get shoehorned into being hashtag Daddies hashtag when it comes to personalities#like yes theyre grounded but that also means they like to duck into their little safety hovels sometimes#if a taurus is in an uncomfortable place/position.. they will often just smile& think abt how much they miss their regular place of comfort#until the moment passes#'oh but theyre so stubborn and loyal! theyll stand up for anyone! all the time!' stubbornness can ironically flucuate#theyre still showing stubbornness! just to the fact that they wanna go home. and they need this moment to pass#and if they bring something up rn.. it will not pass rn#this kind of thinking does not always bode well with fire signs#as much as i love to bully paul .. seeing others do it just isnt the same.. it does not come from a place of love in the end !!#'hes always been a coward-- too afraid to step up and be the bad guy. do the dirty work' no girl hes just a bit stupid#hes literally excitedly told reporters that hes soooo hyped up to try and be the rebound passer guy today#and then one game later hes like 'yea i kinda did too much.. that was.. not good 😔'#like he is doing the best in his mind! his doing bad is not out of bad intent! it's good intent and he is just failing miserably at it#LEAVE MY CRINGEFAIL MALEWIFE ALONE ‼️‼️‼️#MY CANCELLED GIRLFAILURE !!#he just wants to be a trophy husband to a terrifying strange and unusual mystery of a man like isnt that why we wrote dracula#is this not why creepypasta self insert y/n imagines exist on wattpad ?#paul george is just a y/n living in a spiteful world#LMFAOOO#hes so stupid i want to kill him but no one else can kill him but me ok#pg13 years old
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category five "listened to 'good wife' by mika while thinking about fitz and beloved" event and if i have to suffer so do y'all
#roteposting#at least this time i'm bringing you a song from the 21st century#you can listen to your comfort album after a bad day but watch out!
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wiggles my fingers at you ouuuu… you want to tell me about solace so bad…
HKJGG wiggles my fingers back lovingly!!! i really do, i fuckin LOVE solace :3 hey did you know i really like making fake skill descriptions?
SOLACE
Follow the north star. Find light in even the darkest places. Cool for: Optimists, Recovering lost souls, Sweet summer children
Solace is the skill you tucked away long ago, at the bottom of Pandora's box. The little one that tells you: despite it all, there is still hope. It needs a lot of nurturing -- and it's far from being the most helpful for police work -- but taking care of it is basically self-care. It enables you to find the glow in yourself that you often ascribe to gold lungs or brilliant halos in others. It encourages you to wake up and watch the sunrise, to play board games with someone you love, to forgive yourself and let yourself be a gentler kind of animal. Constantly looking forward to a brighter future, it also helps shield your morale from damage.
At high levels, Solace gives you a heightened sense of childlike optimism - which isn't always the sense to lead with in this precariously harsh world. Always looking for the bright side will blindside you with naivety. At low levels, however, you may just extinguish whatever keeps your soul alight. You've already lost her once. You may not survive the desolation if you let her disappear again.
#i wanted to draw a skill portrait for her for this but [gestures vaguely at life] i hope this is cool enough hkjgkj <33#solace is truly voli's ''keep going. there's still hope for us'' and echem's ''we can be happy again! let's go find joy wherever we can''#this is why i keep saying she's their kid hkjgh she covers the happy medium of both of their ideologies. hope for a happier future.#harry goes to the store and finds a pair of pink heart shades that gives her ''+1 Rose Colored Glasses'' :3#i feel like theres some mechanic that keeps her from gaining too many points. a locked skill cap or maybe she can lose skill points??#hm. considers this.#echem voice ''i can't believe i'm saying this but we really can't drink alcohol anymore. it's bad for the baby :(''#ALSO. THIS IS ONE OF MY MORE SELF INDULGENT WORKS SO IF IT SEEMS OOC IN ANY WAY THAT'S BC THIS IS MY COMFORT FIC HGKJKJ#i know sometimes i write skill relationships too sweet and the world too kind and the game too unrealistically...#i know shivers said the end of the world is in 22 years. i know being a revachol cop would kill solace. i know alcoholism is hard to kick#and dora still haunts us. i know life is so hard and there is so much that kills hope and that the pale is going to swallow elysium. i know#but isn't disco elysium about how the world is awful and corrupt and futile but there is still beauty and worth to living in it?#the sky. the world. you're still alive. after death; life again. one day i will return to your side. sunrise parabellum.#the phasmid exists. the pale can be fought back with art. the city's alive and she told us she loves us. and solace believes there is hope.#augh idk man hjlkjg just don't want to lean into the ''young witch trying to find a cat in the alps'' bullshit lmao FUCK that </3#i just think harry deserves a hope skill.#volta transmissions#inland drabbles#task: when two skills love each other very much
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I'm so glad my weewoo show is back on again tonight cos I just need smth feel good to feel good about and my weewoo show makes me feel good
#marie txts#911#911 abc#my other shows arent back yet so my weewoo show is the only good thing i have#like i love these characters so bad they're literal my comfort#and after these past 2 days i just need some love and comfort like only my weewoo show can give
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we haven’t even hit daylight savings ending and I already feel the seasonal depression sinking in girl help
#it’s not all bad I find winter very comforting in a lot of ways#hibernation and habits and warm things#right now im just brimming with excititment for my tit show and all the other stuff they’re gonna get up to but#i fear after that having little going on or to look forward to will be a bummer#one day at a time#blossoms.txt
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