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[daughterearth]

Okay, I don't like to enter discourse and a pick rage bait but I cannot see this as a black and white discourse as a south asian woman. @organic-homegrown-boyfriend exactly let's see how far the rot goes - where is the line of people like us and not us is!!

A few things -

1. "Terrorist land" - Op knows nothing about geopolitical differences between south asian countries and their history. Indian and Pakistani culture, Middle eastern culture are entirely different branches. We are not abrahamic religion followers, we are not a branch of that culture. And indian export of terrorism is fucking nowhere. So stop grouping everything together. These are not coherent arguments. Because brown people's land =\= terrorist land.

Let me tell you about terrorism and land - The same land the European lady screamed about was the land her ancestors pillaged and ransacked and destroyed and earned enough to live this life free from coloniser's guilt. Who answers for the ecology, the resources, the people for creating these countries that they now can be fortified in from all the poverty and disasters Asia and Africa face that women have been pushed under into more physical and sexual abuse.

2. The same "European" roots she claims - have historically raped and killed and abused children and women in other countries. Even the countries where you consider "white" - the indigenous population and land has been decimated. You did what you could with your religion, your weapons, your illness, your frequent abuse over centuries - what you now claim as your lands. I assure you - "Europeans" they are not better people, they are not simply more "civilised" they simply did everything that you can to wash your hands off in lands that were far off. The illness that killed millions, the famines that put thousands to death were all European fucking exports.

3. "Refugees" - again, broad fucking generalisation because the regions these European countries destabilised with their army and money now can create a problem!!!

But, Let me get this straight -

1. Indian refugees - even if you want to look there - have been more in middle East than the European countries.

2. Maximum indian migration has been to the USA where they form the highest educated and well paid sector of the migrants incoming!

4. "Ugly" / Toxic culture - when radfems/aligned/leaning of colour complain of racism - this is exactly the point we put forward.

The coloniser's white washing/ the burning of our literature/ the killing of our stories/ the reframing of our beauty - will never be "white/homogenous" so it is ugly.

See racism is not a separate apartheid situation in this world currently - it's little prejudices that you insinuate = when we talk about racism this is what we talk about.

One - Every South Asian woman, every woman who has an experience has the right to say what it was - in its entire truth, barring no detail. It's a prerequisite for any conversation. And it is fully welcome and accepted.

But these blanket statements and then saying that women too can go back to their toxic culture is what is frankly revolting. We can pick sides but you have to see that so many European people were complicit in what has happened and continues to happen around the world. If we club everyone together - you also don't get to brush everything off from how the empire is built to what it costs!

Our cultural heritage is not sanitised and we don't pretend it is. We are not reaching for superiority over cultures or religions but it seems like this downputting has no end. Especially for Hindus and Indians. We have roots of every kind of evil but you pretending that yours is more different, more tamed, or much better or not evil all together - is just not seeing how you have been complicit in making all these evils true in other lands.

When we talk about feminism and sisterhood in real life which is not black and white- I implore you to see how to say and what you mean and what historical context it has and what it means to the person it is targeted towards with some clarity of concept and ground reality of the real world.

A friend of mine who moved to Europe screamed on a Pakistani man's face in her uni to go back to his terrorist land. And i loveee her for that. Europe needs to deport all the south asian men back to their countries I AM SERIOUS. South Asian women literally move to western countries to flee their patriarchal cultures just to find the same cultural oppression brought upon by these ugly incels from India and Pakistan. I don’t care if these men are refugees or came for a better lifestyle, they need to go back. I also don’t care if they are some woman’s hUsbAnds or family if those women care too much about these males they can go back as well since they love their toxic culture way too much apparently.

[lxxiezz]

Solace in the fields

Shadow the hedgehog x fem!mobian!reader Reader is a fem!mobian lynx! (My cute lil idea) Not proofread, sorry y'all

It was a quiet evening in your home, you peacefully lounged on your living room couch, having some soft background music playing as you read a novel you found randomly in your bookshelf earlier, your partner, Shadow was away on a mission that he didn't specify much about. You didn't bother to push for more information about it anyway, you trusted him. You hear a sudden 'whoosh!' from behind you, as your ears twitched at the sound and you whipped your head around to see Shadow, causally approaching you and placing a kiss on your forehead. "Back already?"

You ask, not expecting him to come back so soon. "Sounds like you didn't miss me." He teased, circling around the couch to sit next to you. "(Name), I would like to show you something I have found while I was away." He spoke, as you placed a bookmark into your book and quickly switching off the background music you had playing, then turning your head towards him to give him your full attention. "What, now? It's almost 11.30 pm, Shads."

You lightly protested "Trust me, my love. It will be worth it." He offered you the smallest smile, before standing up, pulling you up along with him. "Alright, alright."

Shadow held your hand as you trudged through an unfamiliar forest with him, it was pretty peaceful at this time of night, only hearing the rustling of leaves and the chirps from cricket around. "Are we nearly there yet?" You nag in a lighthearted manner. "Almost, love." He says, holding your hand as he lead you through the forest, suddenly coming to a stop. You walk forward to stand next to him, looking at the landscape in awe. The lush of the forest stopped blocking out your view, as you see a small patch of grass and pretty prairie flowers, with an outline of rock deviding the grassy patch and the edge of a cliff that Shadow brought you to. "It's beautiful.." You murmur, upon seeing the gorgeous scene. The night sky was almost cloudless and clear, the moonlight shining bright, the silvery rays of light gently illuminating the two of you. You turn to look at him with a small smile. "Not as beautiful as you." He said, voice barely above a whisper. You stifled a short laugh from the overused phrase you hear often, finding humor in how it's considered corny. "Sure, honey." You said, walking forward to sit down on the grass patch, admiring the scenery. "I mean it." You hear Shadow say, as you feel him sit beside you, you lean your head on his shoulder. "(Name).." He began, as you turn your head to look at his pretty crimson eyes. "I wanted to show you this view, because I wanted to share the beauty of it, but to also remind you how much you mean to me." He spoke, intertwining his hand with yours. Offering you the slightest ghost of a smile. "And i love you, (Name)." You offer him a sweet smile leaning in to share a kiss with him, his lips soft and tender, feels like home.. you'd think. "I love you more, Shads." You reply, as he pulled you in closer.. In these moments, you loved him for the way he made anything feel so safe and peaceful.

THERE WE GO FIC NUMBER TWO LETS GO LETS GO im also finding my writing style and the banner thing ;3

[hopeymchope]

The utter brilliance of Castlevania: Nocturne S1 (and the fucking pox of right-wing YouTubers)

I just rewatched Castelvania: Nocturne's first season, and it's so fucking excellent. Upon first viewing, I already thought it was probably the second-best season of animated Castlevania, but now? I think it's probably the best one.

The character relationships offer so much drama and emotion. The dialogue is both clever/witty AND moving. The directing of the action sequences has always been top-tier on this show, but the vocal performances make them even more engaging and involving. The way they've infused historical context into the story is absolutely brilliant.

Some of the weird story decisions RE: Dracula at the end of the first series' fourth season (not unsatisfying decisions, mind you, but still just... bizarre, if you're adapting this franchise) really stuck the writers in a weird position as far as how to move forward. I could think of maybe three solid possibilities: one which would undermine the ending of S4 completely, one which would require a HUGE leap forward into the modern day, and the third? Is basically what they did.

Bringing in Erzebet Bathory, the primary antagonist of Castlevania: Bloodlines, was certainly a valid approach for how to deal with the Dracula situation. Applying her to the Rondo of Blood/Symphony of the Night era is surprising, but not terribly so; it's not like her historical counterpart didn't already exist. I have some qualms with HOW they did this (why is she Russian now instead of Hungarian.... ?), but there's no denying that she serves as an effective antagonist.

Look at that; that's literally Maria's design in "Nocturne" right there.

As a fan of the games, this is obviously a different world but still an extremely familiar one. Seasons 3 and 4 of the first series felt like we were drifting farther and farther away from our roots in the games, but Nocturne brings us closer to that inspiration again. Richter and Maria look like they stepped right out of the PSP's "Dracula X Chronicles," with their costumes nearly identical... though of course, Richter eventually adds and embraces the headband from his original "Rondo" design. Maria is just a handful of years older than she is in Rondo/Dracula X Chronicles, allowing her to be far less of the out-of-place childish cartoon character that she comes off as in Rondo (or Castlevania Judgment, for that matter). I realize that was the POINT of her character in Rondo — to feel like she invaded from a totally different series — but the writers do a great job bringing her in line with the tone and characters of the animated series and overall franchise in Nocturne. The characters' powers and abilities are very much based in the games; we even get an (incredibly rousing!) rendition of "Divine Bloodlines" when Richter pulls off a "Grand Cross"-style magical attack for the first time in his life. It's exhilarating. And that's even without me getting into how Richter uses his triple-knife throw, or how we get the lore of the woefully underrated "Harmony of Dissonance" rolled into this show when a certain character makes a surprise appearance (to my immense delight).

Regarding the original four seasons... "I'm going to eat your soul, shit it out and and use it to smother your fucking girlfriend" was not the kind of dialogue I expected to hear from DEATH, of all people.

There are times in the original four-season run when it feels like it's trying a little too hard to be edgy and grimdark—times when the excessive gore and the insane use of profanity feels like it's screaming "I AM AN ADULT ANIMATED SERIES" in a way that's undermining its best qualities. But Castlevania: Nocturne is too confident to fall into such traps. The gore is there, the profanity is present, but it's only in service of exciting action, consistent characterization, and powerful storytelling; no lingering still shots of blood-spattered cribs for shock value are necessary. It's just a smash from start to finish, and after each episode, I find myself pondering the implications of certain lines and stories — thinking about the goddamn philosophical underpinnings of this animated show based on video games.

Nocturne is a prime example of how and why we're in a golden age of video game adaptions right now. This thing is BEGGING for a deep dive into its world, its lore, and its characters' worldviews. It's the kind of thing that would make for killer YouTube essays exploring all of its facets, because there is just SO MUCH here.

So when I go onto YouTube, and I only find one video that even says "It's not that bad" amidst a goddamned SEA of "This show's writing is shit and this series is fucking woke trash"??? That's when I know WE HAVE FAILED AS A FUCKING SPECIES.

These fucking right-wing YouTube dudebros are ruining our ability to think logically, they are MURDERING our media literacy. They are an absolute cancer. The fact that we don't have strong counterpoints out there against them is a crime; the right-wing grifters have totally conquered the algorithm.

I wish I had the skill or knowledge or even TIME to make videos of my own.

Fucking ugh.

[lolitastories]

Blue Eyes

Rafe Cameron

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.

“Are you sure we can’t just skip town and settle in- I don’t know, Canada sounds fun!” I woke up early in the morning to head back home hoping Rafe would stay in his house with our daughter while I dealt with my family. But Rafe being Rafe convinced me it was better to deal with it together, so now I am cleaning my house while he plays with the baby on the couch not listening to my pleas. “She can learn how to ice skate, maybe hockey?” I scream from the kitchen. “I heard healthcare is amazing-”

“Breathe.” I turn around setting the rag on the counter. I look up and see Rafe on the kitchen doorway with our daughter in his arms. I pat my hands dry on my pants as I walk closer to them.

“Japan?” He grins, shaking his head. I groan as I place my head against his chest. “This is going to be unbearable.” Rafe moves his fingers under my chin and lifts it.

“Maybe it won’t be,” I raise my brow, he couldn’t even believe in his own words. “As long as they don’t make any rude remarks, we will be fine, civilized.” He comes down and places a kiss on my forehead.

“If It hadn’t been for a moment of weakness, I wouldn’t have been dealing with this.” I grab Rafe's hand and pull him towards the couch. “I just had to visit my grandmother,” I hear Rafe laugh as he sits down and places our girl in between us.

“By the stories, what else did you expect from a mother-in-law who deep down never liked her son’s wife?” My father was her first born and definitely her favorite.

“Maybe respect her granddaughter's wish of wanting to wait before I tell the rest of the family.” I look over to find Rafe just grinning. “That grin won’t last long,” I stood up and moved to take a spot on his lap. One arm around his shoulder while the other caresses his face. “I can handle them if things go south. I don’t want to put you in a difficult situation.” I look down, chuckling as I watch our daughter grab a fist full of my pants as she tries to crawl between us. “I know your temper and I want you to promise you won’t let them get the best of you,” I look back at him, who is staring blankly back. “Please?”

“Okay” He helps our daughter stand on his lap and her small arm waves around to get a hold of Rafe. We laugh seeing her almost hit me.

“She has to learn how to share,” It's like she understood. Her small head turns over to look at me. I placed my face in the crook of Rafe's neck but soon after she was back to hitting me. “He was mine first” I playfully joke which she smiles at. Our moment is cut short when we hear a knock on the door.  I took a deep breath before opening the door which revealed my parents, grandmother and sister. “Hey”

“Hi honey, how are you?” My grandmother passes by without even looking at me. “There she is!” I hear her excitement.

“Let us have a good reunion, okay?” I move aside a bit more and stay quiet due to my mother's words. My father only nods his head and walks in close behind my mother.

“Ready?” I look up and shake my head. “Too bad.” I know my sister was trying to lighten up my mood, but these nerves can’t be knocked out until they are out of here. I walk to stand beside Rafe who was already being stared down by my parents.

“Mom, dad, grandma, this is Rafe” My grandmother looks up and smiles before going back to babbling at my daughter.

“Nice to meet you” Rafe goes to shake their hand, but they don’t even give him that. I roll my eyes and turn towards my sister.

“This is my sister.” I point over and she smiles, coming forward to shake his hand.

“Nice to meet my sister's first boyfriend,” I give her a stare, but she doesn’t take the hint. “She wasn’t much for dating so imagine us more than surprised when we heard she had a kid with someone.” She was the only one laughing.

“Yeah, imagine us surprised.” My mother coldly said. “We never interfere with her choices because she has always been our responsible one but not even letting us be part of such an important part of her life well, we didn’t expect that.”

“What made you think that was a good decision?” My father finally looked straight into my eyes. “Wasn’t he the reason you came home for those weeks? Now you have a child with him?”

“No. My reasons for coming home were about me, I needed time to breathe, and I thought going home would clear things up.”

“Doesn’t seem like it cleared up anything in you. You must have come home because you told him you were pregnant, and he didn’t want anything to do with you or your child.” He knocked the wind right out of me. “Then you moved back, and he probably didn’t even help you through your pregnancy and only shows up once a week” His tone got higher as he spits out his words.

“I am not going to argue about what he did or didn’t do because you don’t deserve or have the right to that part of my life. I have a child with this man, and he will keep on being part of my child's life because he wants that too.” My hands felt numb.

“What will happen when he decides to leave huh? How would you take care of your child alone as a single mother? You’re tough my girl, but you fall down so easily.” My jaw stiffens as I watch my mother agree with my father's words.

“Well, that is part of life, isn’t it?” I look directly at my mother. “You know more about fighting for your kids as a single mother than I will, but I can assure you I will not find a man of convenience. I can handle that, you two on the other hand have no right to give me advice on that topic.” My mothers' eyes look down before taking her stance again. I remember the day I was hiding in the living room. She was talking on the phone, and she was talking about not loving my father. She married him because he had the means to take care of her and her children she brought into the marriage. That is when my view of them together forever changed, he wasn’t my real father, but I loved him, and she didn’t love him. “Now another part of my life I don’t need advice on is you being a part of her life,” I pointed over towards my daughter who was getting fussy in my grandmother's arms. “I know you aren’t here for me so if you want to get to know her, I will accept it as long as you know your place.” I feel Rafe's hand entwined with mine.

“You think-”

“Dad.” My sister walks forward. I could see the anger in his eyes. The way his hands are fisted shut. My head turns when I hear a cry from my girl. I walk over and take her from my grandmother's arms. I didn't hear what my sister was telling them, but they were quiet when I walked over to Rafe.

“We need time.” My mother finally speaks. She picks up her purse and starts heading towards the door with the rest. “We will let you know when we are available to visit.” My grandmother kindly hugs me before she walks out along with my sister.

“Mom?” I stand in the doorway watching as she steps down the stairs following my father towards the car. “My life will continue with or without you and so will hers. I will not go out of my way to please you anymore; I have more important things in my life now.” Her cold stare and demeanor don’t change. She walks off taking another quick glance back at me as she gets into the car. I shut the door and hear in the background how the tires drive off in the gravel. My mind was interrupted when I felt two hands grip my face and pull me in. Rafe places multiple kisses on my lips, then my cheek until he stops and stares at me. I didn’t notice until a laugh came out of my mouth, but I had a huge smile on my face.

“I am so proud of you” He wraps his arms around my waist making sure not to squish our daughter. “Are you okay?” He says lovingly. I nod my head letting my shoulder fall from all the tension.

“Yeah.” It felt like forever with them here but now that is it all over, I feel so relieved like it never happened. “We need to make this a happy day again.” Rafe raises his eyebrow questioning me. “Let's go out!” I pull apart with him and start getting the diaper bag ready.

“How about the aquarium?” I pause thinking back to the last time I visited one. “You love it, and it will be nice to share that with her since she is becoming obsessed with that otter” I laugh putting that exact otter in her bag.

“You don’t want to go thrifting?” I tease handing him the bag.

“No.” He instantly responds. “I will follow you through hell, but I don’t think I can do another antique store or thrift store for another month.” I roll my eyes.

“You are exaggerating,” I hand over our daughter so I can put on my shoes. “But I guess I will just have to find me another man who doesn’t mind”

“You do that, and he won’t last long breathing.” I ignore his comment and stand up to take the diaper bag from his hand.

“Whatever macho man. Let's go because we have enough time to get back before her nap.” I rush over to the door and see him slowly walking. “I thought we would repeat our prior activity while she naps but it's fine-” I hold back a laugh when I see him speed run past the door.

“You should have started with that!” I shake my head as I lock the front door and rush down to the stairs towards his truck. “Don’t you dare touch that door!” My hands weren't even raised I thought in my head. I hear the gravel move under his feet as he comes around the truck. I go to turn around, but his hand meets my hip and pushes me against the truck gently. His other hand moves to tuck my hair behind my ear.

“I know this feels too normal to go back to where we used to be, but We know that we can’t go back to the way we were before.” He moves his body closer. “I want to be the man you need not just because you are the mother of my child but because you deserve someone who treats you right.” My body shivers to see his eyes full of such devotion. “We will go slow when it comes to us because this is forever. I will take my time for the sake of us.” I wasn’t the one to cry but Rafe's always brought it out of me.

“I love you” I say in a shaky voice. A smile appears on his face, and he moves forward to place a simple kiss on my lips.

“I love you too” I didn’t meet Rafe in his crazy teen years, but I have heard stories about how unhinged he was back then. I wonder how many people would be shocked to see him now. A devoted father who will do anything for his little girl, and a man who looks so lovingly at me. So sappy, I smiled to myself. Then again why did I care? This was the Rafe I knew and loved, and he wasn’t going anywhere.

[concretejunglefm]

Poltergeists: Chapter 14.

Chapters: Prologue, Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Bonus Chapter, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Bonus Chapter, Chapter 6, Bonus Chapter, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Bonus Chapter, Chapter 9, Bonus Chapter, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13

Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader, Nicholas Ruffilo x Reader, possibly more BO members.

CW: Missing person, elements of supernatural horror, mentions of blood and possibly violence, unreliable narrator, implied smut. will update as it goes on. Heavy trigger warning for mentions of alcohol use, ptsd and panic attacks.

WC: 1.5k.

AN: This series will be told throughout a variety of flashbacks and present day, all which will be marked.

Divider: Silent-stories.

Tagged: @enemiestolovershoe, @fadingangelwisp, @littlepeachwhispers, @concreteangel92, @deathblacksmoke, @1toreyouapart, @lacy1986, @chaoticwineaunt, @ichoosetenderomens, @baddestomens, @blade-dressed-in-red, @halfalgorithmhafdeity, @geminigirlfromfinland, @fuck1ng-queen, @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard (if anyone else wishes to be tagged lmk)

PRESENT DAY

“Will you just let me pass so I can go with her!” Detective Green, or Detective Douche as I like to now call him, is keeping me back as the paramedics wheel her out from the house on a stretcher and into the back of an ambulance.

She wasn't pronounced dead on their arrival, which was a good sign, but the bruising around her neck raised some questions, not only from the paramedics but myself.

Nick is barely saying anything, keeping himself back, even as I continue to argue with Detective Douche about me going with them.

“I’ll take you down to the hospital myself but right now you need to be checked over.” He explains, but I refuse the help which comes my way from a small blonde yet hesitant paramedic, who's hand I swat at the moment she tries to reach for me to check me over. 

“Can’t we do this down at the hospital?” I argue and Kit relents, stepping back as he allows me to move forward and toward the open back doors of the second ambulance. I climb up and in, with Nick following silently. He can barely look me in the eye at the moment but my concerns aren't with him, they’re with the ambulance which already has a head start on us.

There were a lot of questions which came with apparently being missing for a year.

Missing. That was what they called it. Missing or dead. The latter somehow didn't scare me as much as it should've, perhaps because where I was felt enough like heaven that being dead was the last of my worries.

Detective Green was the one who questioned me, though even he seemed to have no understanding as to how I'd appeared out from the closet in our own home and unharmed at that. 

All that blood and there was not a mark on me.

I shudder at the memory of that night. I remember everything, as much as I wish not to. Sometimes it would play as a loop during the dull moments of the limbo I resided in.

Other times it would plague me as a literal repeat of events, taunting me as I yelled and called for bubs, only for my fate to always be the same.

My favorite moments were always those by the lake. Our spot.

I knew it was never her, but when the creature came to visit me disguised as her, wearing her skin as close to her image as possible, I could convince myself that I was happy here. 

Because it told me I should be.

“You’re free to go Mr. Seb—”

“Where’s Bubs?” I cut Kit off the minute he lets me go free from being observed, from being questioned, from everything, jumping up from the hospital bed as Nick reaches out as if to hold on and steady me.

“A room down the hall, but be warned Noah. It's not… she’s not in the best state.”

The warning is one I ignore, already half way through the door before heading down the hallway, questioning a nurse I pass on the way and following her direction.

I come to a stop as I reach the door, peering in at her through the glass before taking a step inside. I don't know what I'd anticipated seeing; perhaps the sight of her hooked up to a monitor and a machine or two, but there were tubes and wires everywhere.

Steadily approaching the bed, my fingers ghost along the blanket which lays over her before meeting her fingers. They’re warm but there’s no movement. There’s nothing. She looks as if she's sleeping and peaceful enough that I could be convinced she’s an angel.

From behind me I hear footsteps and when I turn my head I catch Nick standing in the doorway, his lip between his teeth as his brow furrows in worry.

There's a tightness in my throat as I go to speak and  I attempt to hold back the emotion wishing to push free.

“What happened?” 

FLASHBACK

DAY OF NOAH'S DISAPPEARANCE

You've been down at the station all day answering question after question. They didn't hold you. You don't think you're a suspect, though they treat you like one.

You can't remember the things you were asked, or what you said, all you know of that you kept repeating yourself with the same four things; you weren't awake when he was yelling, it was too dark for you to even see anything, you don't know where the blood came from, you don't know anything.

You don't know anything.

Except you do, but don't know if what you know is even real. Your mind has been playing so many tricks on you these last few months that even now, nothing feels real. You feel as if you're living in a daze, everything around you is hazy except there's no lightness, only a heaviness in your body and a thickness to the air which makes it difficult to breathe.

"Are you sure you want to go back in there?" Nicholas asks you from the drivers seat.

"Yeah, bubba. We can grab some stuff for you if you want?" Folio chimes in from the back. 

Everyone had taken shifts throughout the day to wait for you to be released from questioning after making their own statements. Nicholas had been there all day waiting for you, while Folio had been the last to come out and told Matt and Jolly to head home.

You haven't answered. You sit silent, looking out the passengers side window up at the house. It feels daunting to enter, but you know that have to.

"You can stay at mine." The feel of Nicholas' hand on your knee pulls you back from the drain of thoughts you'd been circling, your head snapping in his direction.

"No." You finally answer, your voice is horse from all the crying you've been doing. You're out of tears now, you think. "I... I'll be fine." Your voice isn't assuring, not even to yourself. "I just really want to be alone right now."

From the corner of your eye you can see Folio attempting to reach for you and stop you as you open the passengers side door, before he retreats. You know he's just worried about you, but he doesn't protest your wish to go back to the house or to even be alone.

Nicholas doesn't even voice his own concerns about you being left to your own devices when in such a clear vulnerable state but you realize why when you hear another door opening and as you step out, you turn to see Nicholas has followed your lead in climbing from the car, offering the keys to Folio who's climbing into the driver's seat from the back.

"Nick."

"No. Noah wouldn't want you to be alone right now and I definitely don't want to leave you on your own."

Tears prickle at the corners of your sore eyes once more. You believed the well to have run dry, only to be proven wrong. You don't have it in you to argue and you nod, turning and allowing Nicholas to lead you up the pathway to your home.

Yours and Noah's home.

When you enter you almost expect him to be sat in the couch playing a video game, or over by his desk working on something new, or to come bounding out from the kitchen and greet you, but the house is empty.

It feels as empty as it looks. It feels cold and menacing, like a beast which has now gone to lay dormant after a feast. Because that's what happened, wasn't it?

You sound stupid to believe the house took Noah from you, but it did. You know what you saw. At least you think you do.

Nick's voice doesn't reach your ears as you walk towards the couch, picking up Noah's hoodie which lays over the back of it. You slip it on and it feels like a warm embrace from him. It still smells enough like him that it provides a slight comfort, as if he'd worn it earlier that day.

Exhaustion is quick to hit you the minute you crawl onto the couch and you curl yourself up as small as you can, cocooning yourself in the safety of Noah's hoodie.

You can't bear the thought of going upstairs, of going to your room and where it happened. You know that the police have no hand in cleaning up the aftermath of any incident. Not even one where there's a pool of blood staining the floor and splashes of it coating the walls.

You want to pretend that none of this is happening, that it isn't real and that you haven't just lost your best friend, your boyfriend, in the most inexplicable way.

You hear Nick in the kitchen, cooking or tidying up, you have no idea, but you choose to ignore his presence and close your eyes, until you realise that having him here is perhaps a slight comfort after all. With your eyes closed you can almost convince yourself that it's Noah and that he's not gone at all.

[breakingsanity-aruani]

Hello Breaky,

One thing I am very excited about regarding your next fic “saving you” is the prerspective change we’ll see when it comes to Armin being small. Rather then Tinys being commonplace or at least known about. We shall see Armin in a position not even he fully understands how to deal with, I am especially looking forward to his first reaction to being tiny and the reaction of everyone else as well. The potential for shenanigans is very high.

Hi hi, Mercutio!! I hope you are doing well!! <3 As always, thank you SO MUCH for the ask!!

I am so so so happy that you are excited for my next major fic! And i'm very glad to answer questions about it!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Yes yes, Saving You is another tiny!Armin x Annie story, where he shrinks down this time! Armin will be the same size here as he is in The Difference Between Us, 4 inches tall! Toy sized! Stuff him in your pocket-sized!! You get the idea xD.

As you say, rather than Tiny's existing and being 'creatures' that are well-known throughout the world, SY is a canon-divergence story... which means that Armin is going to be VERY out of water so to say. He will have to face this world that already made him feel small, while being LITERALLY SMALL... So, expect lots of angsty goodness, hehe. His first reaction will be notable and especially given the context of how and why he was shrunk in the first place!

The reaction of others is indeed something I want to include, though I can't say how much we'll get to see it throughout the main scenario, considering... but ofc, things can always change as I develop it more closely. What I do want to have are bonus chapters! Namely, with other characters getting their own time to spend with miniature Armin x3. So, I will say now, yes that includes Mikasa, hehe. Lots of cuteness is ASSURED!! SO MUCH CUTE!! Of course, there will be A LOT of shenanigans, ooooooh so much!! This fic will also take place during the 4 year timeskip after season 3, but then everything is different from there, obviously, haha.

Naturally, ponytail Armin is a MUST in my fics.... tiny or normal sized, heh.

I will be making more detailed explanation of Saving You soon, but, if you and others want to know more about ahead of time... I can make said post sooner than originally planned! Which is no problem :3

Thank you as ALWAYS for the lovely ask!! I cannot express it enough how much I appreciate you and other's questions! I'm so happy to answer each time x3. Please, be well and happy!! <3

[heartbreakgrill]

Delicate: Vessel (Sleep Token); Part 9; "Never seen that color blue."

“No, yeah, of course! Noo…no! Thank you! I seriously appreciate all of your help and understanding during this! I hope you have a wonderful day! Yeah, aw, thanks! You, too! Yeah- okay- bye!”

My faux smile dropped as soon as my hand did, phone falling to a silenced settle on my left thigh. I breathed a shallow breath of somehow anxious relief, so ironic that it made me want to scream.

Max reached across the bed and rubbed my knee comfortingly, “You okay?”

I wanted to snort, yell, kick my feet, and laugh hysterically. Throw a temper tantrum, wish on a star, kiss a fucking frog. Fall on my knees, beg the skies. Change fate's cruel course of time.

But my expression was blank as I shrugged, “What can ya do?”

The corner of his lips lifted into the saddest smile. His thumb brushed my skin, “It’s gonna be alright. Once you settle back in, things will start to feel normal. You can start…moving on. And, hey, I’m visiting in just a month. You have that to look forward to. School starting, your new role at the clinic. So many good things, Daz.”

He was right- I had so much to be excited about. I really should’ve felt excited, grateful. A better woman would have. A better woman would have seen the blessings all around her and felt so full of life and love. God, she would’ve respected herself enough to not be in this situation in the first place.

Yet I couldn’t help but feel resentful, knowing that I would trade all of it for-

for him.

For Oliver.

I would give up everything for just another moment, hanging onto his lips like a vine. Just a second of growth, even if being ripped away meant digging up the roots and my leaves dying.

I just gave Max that fake smile, knowing full well he was aware that it meant nothing. “You’re right. It’ll be good for me to be home.”

He squeezed my knee before removing his hand. “You wanna finish packing? Or maybe take a break? Get some food?”

I glanced around at the mess of clothes across Sam and I’s hotel room. My bags lay open, a few piles of my stuff already stuffed inside. But there was more than half to be done. So much to be done before I went…before I went home tomorrow.

Tomorrow. Less than 12 hours from now. I’d be heading back to reality. Closing the doors on Europe, on everything and everybody I’d be leaving here.

There was just one week left on the European leg of the two. Tomorrow morning, everyone will be leaving for Germany. I’d go to the airport with them, like normal, but depart at a separate gate, at the same exact time. Those who needed to know, well, I was going to tell them. And those who needed to know the reason why would, too. Sam was going to think I was going home because of an offer for a higher position from the clinic I worked at. But this was only partially true. Training for that wouldn’t even start for another 3 weeks. School wasn’t for a month.

I was leaving for me- for clarity, fresh air. Oliver was right- London was foggy, full of pollution and shitty, selfish men.

I needed to get away, out. Back to routine and home. Back to what I knew- what wouldn’t hurt me.

I looked back to Max, “I'm gonna finish packing. Get it over with. Before Sam gets back. I think it might hurt his feelings to walk in and see this…mess.”

Mess might have held a double meaning. I had looked better, for sure. Max understood, I think, for he knocked his shoulder against mine, then stood from the bed. “We got it, Daz.”

I stood up quickly, knowing the only way to get started was to just start. Stand. Move. (I wanted to crawl into a hole and die.)

It took us another hour or so to finish stuffing my belongings into their bags. I had bought maybe one too many souvenirs, so we struggled to find a place for everything. When we were done, I slew myself across the end of the bed, breathing heavily, sweating a little bit.

Max groaned from the floor, “Why do you own so many things?!”

“Dude, I don’t even know. It’s gonna take me 12 years to unpack!”

He chortled, half-heartedly, patting his stomach as an afterthought. “I am soooo hungry. What do you wanna eat?”

I sat up as he did so, shrugging a bit, “You pick. I don’t have the energy for all that.”

“I’m good with the hotel restaurant if you are.”

“Fuck it.”

So, we sludged our way downstairs. I hadn’t been leaving my room much, worried you-know-who would cross my path and shake things up again. Though, I doubted he was looking for me. He hadn’t so much as texted me since last week. Oliver was probably sulking, convincing himself that he was the victim in this whole thing. The thought made my blood rush a little bit. I clenched my fist as the elevator doors closed, trying to focus on breathing and not screaming.

The past three had been probably one of the worst of my life. I was so…so sad. So angry. Confused. Nothing made sense, yet all of my fears had come true. It was like I knew all the answers, but my bones felt so put off by how they manifested themselves. Like, what do you mean the cold, dark, distant boy turned out to be a cheating, manipulative liar? Right on the money.

My rational mind couldn’t wrap around the fact that it still felt so…disappointing? Wrong? Fucked the fucking fuck up.

The doors slid open. I followed, quietly, behind Max as we headed for the inlet to the left of the front counter. This was a usual part of my new found routine, grabbing food with Max. Albeit, sneakily, with numerous texts between the two of us (me, badgering him) ensuring nobody else (Oliver) was down here. In avoiding him, I had been avoiding everybody else, too.

I could already see their knowing looks. Sam could read me like a book. Ronnie was way psychic and usually felt the vibe of a situation long before it occurred. Adam, obviously, already was aware. And I'm sure he would have relayed the information to Cyrus.

I was exuding this aura of heartbroken, school-girl-fantasy-crushed, sad-puppy shit. I felt tired, and I’m sure my eyes looked it, too. Any passerby probably could have read my emotions pretty well. No matter, I’d be out of here soon. Back home. I could heal, rest, relax, find somebody else to fuck and get the fuck over this dumb ass white boy.

My dumb ass white boy. I’d tried not to think about him, so deeply sunk into this angry feeling that I couldn’t even fathom the idea of missing what had hurt me. Alas, every once and a while (between every other curse I thought of) something would flash through my mind. A distant memory, an image of his deep-ocean blue eyes shining with flames from the rooftop firepit, triggered by a breath, a catch of the wind, a sink in my heart. I’d feel a little moth flicker in my chest. An air bubble, taut in my stomach, would have me hiccuping from gushing tears in an instant.

I think it was the deep blue suede of the hotel bar’s stools that did it this time. I brushed a hand, slowly, watching the color shift from the movement of the fabric. The lighter color reminded me of a time he felt the way I did right now. Sadness. Maybe it hadn’t meant as much to him, maybe his depravity was not comforted by me. But that moment, when I held him, when he nuzzled his head into my neck and began crying-

“Wanna drink?” Max rested a hand on my shoulder, drawing my attention back from where I was trudging through fleeting, erasing moments.

I ceased my body from flinching, willed away the wetness in my eyes, and nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, let’s get a drink.”

Which was a mistake.

One drink turned to appetizers turned to three drinks turned to main courses, 5 drinks, 2 shots, and dessert. Before I knew it, Max and I were cackling over some typo on some Twitter post. I gripped his shirt sleeve and hoped I wouldn’t slide off the bar stool. For the first time in a week, I wasn’t concerning myself with the logistics of sticking around in this public area as long as we had been. I wasn’t even thinking of Oliver. In fact, Max and I were discussing some of our favorite shitposts about American politics. My mind was far away from dumb Brits and idiotic Europeans.

Of course, the world had a very funny way of spitting in my face.

Adam, Cyrus, and- low and behold- Oliver came strolling into the bar right when Max and I finished ordering another drink. I felt a little sick, watching as they neared us. Oliver wasn’t paying attention. He never did. His head, sunken into his hoodie, hands shoved in his pockets. He moved like the Grim Reaper. I wondered if he had come to take my soul away.

Adam and Cyrus seemed…on edge. They noticed Max and I only after they’d made it halfway across the room. Adam hesitated on his next step, catching my eye, worriedly glancing between me and Oliver.

Max was aware, at this point. He cut himself off mid sentence, swiping a hand across his lips. “Shit,” he mumbled to himself. “Daisy…let’s go.”

His fingers brushed through mine in a desperate grasp to pull me along with him, towards the door. I was drunk. I was not thinking. I was hysterical, sad, heartbroken, angry. I tugged my hand away, instead flipping into the air to wave and cheerfully catch the group’s full attention.

“Cy! Adam!” I couldn’t quite catch his name on my tongue. I thought I might puke. “Hey, girl!”

Oliver looked up at the sound of voice. He stopped, but three feet from our little round table. The light, dim from the overhead lamps and LED strips behind the counter, caught the round pupils in his eyes. I watched as he blinked once, twice. Blue.

“Oliver!” There it was.

He met my eye. The corners of his lids wilted, like the petals of a flower, aged, saddened. Drops of rain dropping them in weight. Max looked between the two of us. Cyrus busied himself with buying a drink. Adam slouched in the awkward, pregnant air. Oliver ignored me, moved around our group to sit as far away as possible.

I clenched my jaw. Rage. Utter, pure anger. How dare he deny me even now? The fact that he had not come to my door in the past few days, on his knees, begging for my forgiveness- I was seething. And, now, he goes back to his old tricks. Pretending like I don’t exist.

I turned to Max, who was bracing for impact. His hands were wary, held up near me as if to catch my fall. I shrugged, smiled cheekily, wrinkled my nose. I bumped Adam’s shoulder with mine and declared, “Shots on me?”

He continued his smug slump in the bar stool for the next hour. Adam, Cyrus, Max, and I hung like the old pals we were, cracking jokes, swapping stories like we were surrounding a campfire. I glanced at Oliver every once in a while, hoping to accidentally make eye contact like we used to. He stared down at his phone or his glass. I was surprised the device worked considering he’d fucking forgotten my contact existed or something.

Ugh.

What a fucking ass hole.

Adam asked me a question, pulling my attention back in. “Are you excited for Germany?”

Oh. I’d almost forgotten all about this little plot. I knew that if I spoke loud enough, Oliver would hear. He’d react. I could almost hear it, the little hitch in his breath. The tickle in his throat. The flit of his tongue across his lips, the patter of his holey heart.

I felt my own chest jitter with the excitement, the want of a reaction I needed from him. The shock. The idea that I would be an ocean away from him. No longer at an arm’s length.

I turned towards Adam and rested my chin on my fist. I frowned, almost playfully, “Ugh, I hate having to tell you guys like this!”

Cyrus slowly lowered his glass from his lips, having been mid-drink, “What’s up?”

“I’m going home,” my brows furrowed in a naive look. Adam and Cyrus’ chins dropped a sliver. I pouted my lip, “Stop! I know! I’m so sad!”

I wanted to wait until the conversation was over to look down the bar, to see if even a fragment of what I was saying had affected him. But, I didn’t need to wait. Oliver had flinched. He literally flinched.

“Yeah, me, too,” Adam touched my hand. “Why so soon? I thought you were staying through August?”

“I was planning on it, but…they offered me a better position at the clinic I work at. I have to get home to start training,” I continued, a satisfied smirk teasing my mouth.

Cyrus lifted his glass, “Well, there’s nothing to be sad about, then! To your new job.”

“I’ll cheers to that,” the smirk slipped into a genuine smile. I really would miss these guys, but my drunken, stupid mind wasn’t thinking about that. I wanted more from Oliver. I wanted a white flag or a look or a…fuck, I wanted him.

I pushed, “I’ll really miss you guys. Max, with your corny-ass pick-up lines, Adam’s mom vibes, Cy’s ability to knock back more drinks than fucking- I don’t know, Spider-man, and not get drunk? Shit’s insane.”

I drank in the laughter for a moment, eyes lingering down the bar to Oliver. Then, I added a name to my list and narrowed my gaze, “Oliver,” he wouldn’t look. “With your need to ignore me in every room we’re in. I’ll really miss your cold fucking shoulder.”

Any laughter that may have hung onto our past moment faded. I heard Max take a sharp breath in through his teeth. Adam pressed his lips together. Cyrus looked over his shoulder at their friend. I didn’t know if he really knew, but he had to understand just a little bit. The vibes were always there. We thought we were sneaky, but we were so sickly up each other’s asses. We’d even run into Cyrus and Adam in the hallway that one time. I guess we were all really good at being hopefully fucking stupid and blind.

I leaned on my palm and stared that man down. I watched as he kept his chin, pointed ahead, like he was playing brave in the situation. His Adam's apple bobbed. Oliver clutched his glass, swung it back, slugged the liquid down. Slammed it back on the counter. Then, he stood up, pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and threw a wad of bills onto the bar. He adjusted his hoodie and left.

I was dizzy. I stuttered back a step. Max touched my wrist, murmuring something or the other about heading back upstairs. Telling me I was too drunk.

I felt slow, felt dizzy, felt scared, felt angry, felt sad. I felt so sad. I felt so angry and so sad and…

And, my eyebrows furrowed in anger, the shock erasing itself from my frame. I took a deep, drunken breath and followed his trail. Fast. Legs pumping, arms swinging at my sides.

He was at the elevator, looking down at his shoes. I couldn’t get his name out. I think if I did the tears were going to fall out, The sobs were going to ricochet through my whole body and knock me over and kill me and I’d die and I’d never get to see that dumb asses blue eyes any more. Ever again. I wanted to see his blue eyes again. I wanted him to look at me and see me for what he sees me as. I wanted him to touch my hip and wring my neck and tell me I was the only one he wanted. I’d take it. One more time, then he could go back to her. I just wanted a goodbye.

He was stepping into the elevator. The doors were closing. I jammed a hand between and he flinched, again.

I stepped in just as the doors began to shut again. His eyes were wider than I’d ever seen them. He was frozen. Frowning. He looked…sad.

I almost reached a hand out, almost caressed his cheek and pulled him into me. But, I didn’t. Instead, I said (yelled?), “What the fuck is your problem?”

He stammered, “Wha-what?”

I struggled to repeat myself. I needed to cry. It was going to open. But, for another moment, the anger took over, “You fucking heard me. What is your problem, Oliver? What the fuck did I do to deserve this kind of shit? I don’t wanna hear more sad excuses about your fucking mental health and your-your fucking anxiety. God, I- I fucking…I don’t even k- you fucking ignored me back there! I looked right at you and I said your name and I smiled at you and…I’ve been so nice to you. I’ve been nice to you all summer and you treat me like a piece of fucking shit. God, I’ve…I’ve told you so much. I told you about my mom and…and you laid there and you told me all this bullshit about how much you liked me! And then you…youre a fucking-”

I cut myself off, out of breath. I was sweating a little bit. I think I had spit a few times. And I paced the elevator so much that I was flush against the wall. I leaned my shoulders back against the cool metal, wringing my hands, tugging at my hair.

He didn’t say anything. I breathed, hard, I thought, long. I kept thinking, and I kept getting angrier. I turned back to him, rearing up again. I had more to say, I just, I just needed to get some more concise- more thoughtful thoughts, right, exactly. Yes. I can…

“And who the fuck is F-”

“Daisy.”

There it was, my name. It was my name, soft and angelic, and holy. And a moment on his lips that he carved out of time and held a space for, for me to hear.

I stopped. I felt nothing for a moment. I looked at him and he was already waiting to see my eyes. My bottom lip wobbled.

“You’re obviously upset. And, drunk. Why don’t we talk about this in the morning? We can both get some rest.” He was always so good at two very distinct things: pushing stuff (people) aside and speaking to me in a way that felt like a cloud was wrapping itself around me. Like the cloud wanted me to lay in its arm and would coo me to sleep. Like I was safe and loved and-

Loved.

He made me feel loved.

I straightened up a bit at the thought. I pointed an accusatory finger at him, “Who the fuck is Fiona? What the fuck was that all about? Oliver, I’m not going to stand here and beg for you to love me. Or beg for you to come back to me. I just want a goddamn apology. For wasting my time, for playing with my fucking heart. For stringing me along. You knew-”

The tears came. Perfect timing. “You fucking know that I love you. You have known for a very long time. And you are an idiotic fool if you still don’t believe it. But I am not going to play this game with you. I told you that already and now I seriously mean it. I broke my back this summer to make sure that I was who you wanted me to be. So I was cool and chill and could take as much space as you wanted me to. I went with everything you asked of me, I was there when you needed a warm body. I comforted you and…and tried to fucking fix you like I knew you wanted me to. But, I am done. I am done with this. I am done-”

My voice cracked. I swiped an angry, shaking hand across my face. Vision blurred. “I am done with you. This is ridiculous. I don’t know if you meant to, but you have manipulated this situation so that you have been the one benefiting. I’m tired of letting you think you’re some broken, sad puppy dog on the side of the road that needs to be taken care of. Grow the fuck up. And, now I find out that there’s some other woman? That I- I’m the other woman, maybe? That you’re cheating on her with me? That I’m your fucking slut? Side hoe?”

I had paced again, this time, towards him. He was taller than me, but my anger was making me taller. He was almost…cowering. I pointed my finger again, nearly chest to chest with him.

“Fuck you, Oliver. Fuck you and fuck London and fuck your stupid fucking music.”

The doors opened, on our floor. I walked out, but turned to face him before he was really gone from me. I wanted to see his eyes one last time.

He was crying. I popped an arm into the door again, buying myself more time to kick him while he was down. I thought this would bring me closure. I thought I’d feel better if he knew, truly knew, the entirety. Every thought. Every hurt I felt.

“You asked me at the beginning of the summer what I was searching for. I thought that it was you. And I thought that I had found you.”

I shook my head sadly. The doorbell on the elevator rang. I stepped back, “I was right. There is no deeper meaning. Goodbye, Oliver.”

I stood there for a second, as though I could still see his blue eyes, boring through the metal doors.

Then, I sludged my way to my hotel room. I opened the door, shoulders slumped, body aching. I knew my makeup was smeared all over my face. My hair was wrecked. I couldn’t stop sniffling or whimpering. I walked into the room.

Sam sat up in his bed. Ronnie was beside him. I barely made it two more steps before Sam caught me in his arms.

–

The sky was gray. The weather in Europe usually was, especially up here on this side of the continent. I wasn’t surprised when, on our drive to the airport, it started spitting rain. I shivered underneath the cover of my hoodie, yet walked slowly through the entrance.

I remember when I had first dropped down in London, wide-eyed, hopeful. I think it had been raining then, too. But, I hadn’t cared. Come to think of it, it was raining pretty much everyday we had been in London.

Oliver was right about a couple things.

Back then, just three months ago, I hadn’t cared about the sun’s shadow curving from behind the clouds, nor did I mind that it was usually quite chilly outside. Now, I felt anger, annoyance at the weather, at the people, at the world.

At him. The stupid weight of my suitcase. The drag in my step. The wetness of my clothes and the chill of the wind.

I felt older, in the worst way. I was a different age, considering my birthday had passed while I’d been here. But, I felt old in a way that was draining. I felt like I had wasted so much time, energy, and all I had left were weary bones and sadness. Just how much I had left, I didn’t know. But I did know that as soon as I got back home, I would be rotting in my bed for a day or two.

Sam, Max, and Ronnie came to the airport early with me. My flight time had been pulled forward by an hour, so I needed to get here sooner than I thought. I wasn’t complaining, though. I couldn’t wait to get the fuck out of the hotel. Out of here. Out of London.

I hurried the process of packing my last few things. Stuffed my breakfast down my throat. Impatiently waited in the taxi, knee bouncing, as Sam and Max loaded the trunk with all of our things. Ronnie slid in beside me and became the first reason that I cried that day.

She reared a look over her shoulder, out the back window, to check on Max and Sam. Then, with an awkward sigh, she turned her knees towards me, “Peaches?”

I glanced up from my lap and the bounce of my knee slowed, “Yeah?”

Upon noticing the somber gaze in her eyes, my brows furrowed. “What’s up?” I added, fully presenting her my full attention.

Ronnie rubbed her nose in a seemingly nervous manner, “I just wanted to say…um, ew. Sorry.”

I softly giggled at her disgust with whatever sentence she was trying to form. “What is it?”

She finally met my eye in a fervently forward manner, “I usually have fun on tour. But this summer was…it was extra special. Getting to know you has been…so cool. I don’t know. I just…I love you, Daisy. You’ve become like a sister to me.”

I couldn’t help but feel the tears well up in my eyes. “Oh, Ronnie,” I sniffled, hugging her around the shoulders.

She pulled me close to her and I swear I heard her sniffle a bit, too. “I’m sorry for not noticing what was happening. I should’ve been there for you more. I got caught up in my own-”

“Don’t even apologize,” I reared back with my reply, “No. It’s nobody’s fault. I’m not even blaming myself for what happened. It was a stupid, weird situation. It was my responsibility to come to you if I needed help. I just needed…I just need to go home now.”

Ronnie smiled a sad, peaceful smile. “I hope I get to see you again soon. I don’t know what I will do without your bright light.”

“Oh, you will. You guys will be in the US soon. Sam said he was gonna drop by. I am positive you’ll be there, too,” I dropped a sly wink.

Ronnie watched my face for a moment, “I mean, of course you know now. But…” she narrowed her eyes, grinning in shocked realisation, “Fucker. You knew the whole time?!”

“Of course I knew the whole time. Sam is-” I snorted, “Sam is not hiding his lovesick, puppy-dog eyes.”

Ronnie’s gaze widened slightly, “I-”

The doors of the taxi popped open as the boys joined us, Max in the back on my other side, Sam in the front. He saw our laughing, secretive expressions in the rearview mirror and turned back. “What are you two doing?”

I brushed my hands across my cheeks to clear whatever tears might’ve been rolling still, then shook my head. “Nothing, Sam-Ham.”

He turned his eyes to Ronnie and tilted his chin forward. She shrugged, a smug smile contorting her once saddened face. Ronnie dropped a wink, “Nothing at all.”

The second person to make me cry was Max. Out of everyone, he was probably my best friend at this point. We had spent so much time together, out drinking, dancing, holed up in my hotel room with trays of room service, movies on the tv. He had been there through one of the most terrifying, exhilarating, strange summers of my life. We were bonded forever, now. I could feel it.

He was helping me check in while Sam and Ronnie headed to drop off our baggage. They were all just planning on hanging for the extra hour until it was time to check in for their flight. I was grateful they all wanted to sacrifice the time for me. To them, though, I knew it was second nature.

Some people made it easy, loving me.

I shook away the thoughts because the attendant was handing me my ticket. She reiterated boarding time, twenty minutes from now, and wished me a safe flight. “Thank you,” I nodded before turning back to Max.

The tall blonde was watching me. I could tell he was on the verge of tears from just the way that his shoulders shrugged forward. It made my heart swell, knowing how much of an impact I had had on them.

He tried to straighten up as I looked him in the eye. Then, he opened his mouth to say something. I threw myself into his arms before he could. Hugging me tight, Max brushed a hand down the back of my head.

“Oh, sweet, lovely angel. I am going to miss you so.”

I didn’t need to hear anything else to start crying into his chest. Max felt the rock of my shoulders and sniffled into my hairline. “Don’t start, love. I won’t be able to stop, myself,” he chuckled shortly.

We stood like that for a few minutes, maybe more, before I stepped back. I rubbed my eyes on the inside of my sweatshirt, knowing my face was flushed and probably swelling. Max touched his fingers to my wrists and gently brushed aside my hands. He took in my visage, so delicately, and sighed. “Can I just say…”

“Oh, no!” I exclaimed through a sob. More tears fell.

Max rubbed my shoulders, “No, no, no, love. It’s okay. No more tears, okay? We’ll be okay. Just…I just want- I need to tell you how important you are. I know you’re going to go home and things are going to start to settle and you’re going to start to think so many things about yourself. You are so easy to love, Daisy. It is like breathing to me, to Ronnie, to Sam, Sasha. It is breathing. And you are worthy of it, too. That’s all. I just…I just needed to tell you, okay?”

I didn’t say anything else. I just whimpered and pulled him in closer to me.

Sam was the worst.

Since the evening before, when I had broken down in his arms and told him, through my blubbering, a short synopsis of what had happened, we hadn’t spoken much. I didn’t know if it was simply because we didn't have enough time. But, I was feeling worse because of it.

I needed my big brother more than anybody else. Sam knew me better than anybody else, even if we hadn’t been around each other as often as we used to. He still understood me. We shared the same blood, for God’s sake.

Yet, as we sat there, in the waiting area of my plane’s gate, he didn’t even look at me. He stared down at the floor, hands folded in his lap. He sat across from Ronnie, Max, and I, making it known that he wanted nothing to do with the conversation. When he first sat there, the aisle a wide gap between us, I furrowed my brows. But, then, Ronnie and Max striked up some topic that I invested myself and my attention into.

It didn’t seem like that big of a deal until they called for me. I stood up, faster than I should’ve, to be honest, and began to gather my things. Phone, bag, jacket, passport. I ran the list over in my head, three times over.

All the while, Sam slowly stood, stuffed his hands in his pockets, and watched his feet as he scuffed his sneakers across the carpeted floor.

I passed my eyes over him for a moment, holding my breath. Surely, my brother would have something to say to me.

He didn’t make a move.

I began walking the short distance to my gate. Before I moved to get in line, though, I turned back to my friends. Max jumped for a hug first, barely allowing me enough time to fully settle back on my heels. I dug my feet into the ground to gain traction as his ginormous body came toppling into my arms. Ronnie joined in the hug yet struggled to toss her arms over Max’s tall frame. He adjusted as we all shared a laugh and tucked her in beside me.

He called over his shoulder, voice muffled, “Get in here, Sam-Ham!”

I heard my brother elicit a laugh. It felt refreshing to hear. Then, I felt the hug grow tighter as he joined in on Max’s other side. We didn’t stay like that for long. It was stuffy and I wasn’t getting much air.

So, I tapped Max’s back and said, “Alright. Let me go.”

I gave individual hugs to everybody, voicing my own grateful, somewhat short, goodbyes.

Then, I turned to my brother. He evaded my eye contact for a moment or two. Then he pulled me in. Tight.

Out of nowhere, “I’m sorry if he ruined your summer.”

Tensing up from the words, the mention of him, I slowly pulled back from Sam’s embrace. He held onto my back, sort of cradling me. The guilt lying in his eyes was far worse than anything I’d ever seen flash across his face. My own gaze softened from the taut expression it had anxiously contorted to.

“What?” I breathily inquired, unsure if I had heard him correctly, saddened that he was obviously carrying so much hurt from my stupid mistakes. “Why? Sam, it wasn’t your fault.”

“I know, Daz, I just…” Sam’s arms fell from around me. I missed the warmth as soon as the chill of the vast room settled in around my sweatshirt. He ran a veiny hand across his forehead, “I'm supposed to be there for you. Protect you. And I already suck at the first part.”

“Sam,” I grasped his wrist, slipping his fingers between my hands. “It’s not your fault. It’s…honestly, if my summer was ruined, it was because of my own shitty decisions. Besides, you don’t suck at being there for me. I can’t believe you would even think that!”

I clasped his hand tight between mine, brows furrowed. To hear him blame himself, to hear him look this way…This whole summer, I had spent my time obsessing over somebody who didn’t even want me. I should have paid more attention to my brother, who was part of the reason I was here in the first place.

The farther I got from the start of this journey, literally and figuratively, the blurrier my original dreams became. There was no meaning to find here- only what was already there.

The thought made me lick my lips in nervous realisation.

Sam let out a frustrated, breathy chortle. “Don’t give me so much credit. I’ve been…gone. Running away from home. For so long. Worried about getting out of that apartment and town and away from…from anything that could remind me of her. Remind me of mom. I left you behind in the process.”

The wetness in my eyes began to pour over. “Oh, Sam,” my lips trembled out as I dove back into his arms. I dug my fingers into his shoulders, holding onto him as though an airplane would dive down and pull him away. I needed this. This kind of hug. This moment.

Clarity was nearer than ever before.

“Listen,” I pulled back, “I need you to understand, okay? My summer was not ruined. It wasn’t. This entire experience has been the most amazing, wonderful, awesome, cool time. I got to spend so much time getting to see you, getting to see your world. And, don’t ever blame yourself for getting away. You had to. I see it now- You had to come be a part of this wonderful band, go with them on all of their amazing tours. I see it on your face, Sam. This is what you’re supposed to do, okay? My mistakes are my own. Not yours.”

“I just…” Sam stared at the floor for a moment, tongue quick to go and defend his original claim But he paused and let the information process. “I…I just wish I could punch him in the face or something. What a douche. Dragging you into his mess. I should’ve known, too. The way he treated you- it was so obvious. For that, I am sorry, Daisy. I should’ve said something. Honestly,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair, “I should beat his ass.”

Max and Ronnie, who had been trying to make it appear as though they were not eavesdropping, laughed at the last line. I opened up Sam and I’s moment by taking a step back. I gave them space to join us here. Ronnie clasped Sam’s hand and rested her head on his shoulder, “As funny as that would be, he is still your boss. And your bandmate,” she nodded to Max.

The tall blond rolled his eyes with a scoff, “Don’t worry. I’ll try to keep it civil.”

It was my turn to scold. I punched Max in the shoulder to gain his eye contact, “Don’t try. Just do it. He’s not a bad person. He just…sucks. A little bit.”

Talking about him, living in the truth of the situation, confronting all the dark realizations- it was a heavy weight to bear. I felt my shoulder slinking forward, as though I were Atlas with the dark, cloudy sky above me. Though I didn’t want to be rid of these three, I needed to be gone already. I needed to go before it all came crashing down again. I didn’t want anybody else to see me cry again. It was…embarrassing, to say the least.

So, I allowed one last hug from each of them and then turned towards my gate. I boarded the plane, mindlessly, going through all of the motions. Like I was used to leaving, like I was good at it. Like I was strong. But, I felt weak. I felt heavy and sad and angry and…

The city was gray. I remember it being sunny, summer-weather, though there had been a chill in the air. He always said it was. Maybe it always had been and I was…crazy. Wide-eyed. Desperate or naive or whatever.

But it was clear as day now, how dreary it looked from this airplane window. The wind whipped at the airline workers, shuffling luggage to their places, green vests billowing up. My breath fogged at the window which narrowed my pointed gaze. It seemed the plane was being pumped full of heat. I hadn’t realized it was that cold outside.

I guess fall was coming.

“Ladies and gentleman, this is your reminder to place your devices on airplane mode. We are approaching take-off,” a thick, European accent declared over the PA system.

I wrestled to retrieve my phone from my bookbag, which was squished in between my feet. When I was able to lift it towards me, the screen lit up. There was a buzz from the device that vibrated my hand then the appearance of a text message.

Oliver: Daisy, I need to tell you…

The message cut itself off, only the sneakpeek visible due to the system settings I had on my device.

It was ominous, though, like it had chosen to cut itself off there.

The tail end of that message could be- anything.

Daisy, I need to tell you…you’re a dumb bitch?

…I fucking hate you.

I love you?

Please, stay?

I don’t think I wanted to know.

My thumb hesitated over the screen, barely gracing it’s smooth glass. If I tapped on the message, if I saw what he said…would it change things?

Would it make me hate him even more?

Would it make me want to stay?

I didn’t want anything else to make my decisions anymore. I wanted to make my own choices, based on my own actions, thoughts. I was tired of living up to everybody’s image of me. If that was all I learned this summer, to be true to what I wanted, to be true to myself…then maybe this summer wasn’t so bad after all.

Maybe there had been something to find- maybe that something was me.

The shaking in my hands must’ve made the screen react to a ghost of my fingerprint. The option to scan my face ID came as soon as a flight attendant passed by my section, a bright smile on their face.

“Hi, friend! Did you put your device on airplane mode?” They asked with a slight gesture towards my phone.

I glanced back at the screen as she pointed. The message was open. That’s where it had ended, what Oliver had sent to me. “I need to tell you something.” But, he was still typing, still coming up with words to say.

My hands moved quickly, sliding down the menu and thumbing the airplane option. If he were still typing, I couldn’t see it anymore.

And any messages he may try to send would go green, undelivered, lost.

Forgotten, in the skies, somewhere between London and Germany, during the beginning of a cold, cold autumn.

[quilly72]

Sablique quickly rushed inside the pantry as Donovan motioned her over. "What. What is it"

Donovan hushed her. His 5'10 frame edging over her in height at her 5'8 perspective.

Don closed the door as she scooched in closer to him. The lights flickered on as they quarantined themselves away from the family reunion on the other end of the door. Donovan pulled a box out of his pocket as he opened it revealing 3 small pills inside. "These came in earlier today and I've been itching to try them. I tried to wait because of the get together but I don't think I can hold it back much longer." He pulled a pill out as he twirled it on his fingers.

"what do they do" she whispered.

He smirked as he focused back on the pill. "You know how I've always been self conscious about my.. size... Well these fix that they help me perform better."

"here! Now? Don what of they hear us."

"we'll be fine worse comes to worse we bar the door closed and just refuse to come out. What are they gonna do sit out there for 8 hours. After all all the foods in here."

Sablique didn't dare admit that the thought was turning her on slowly. Although Don could see it in her eyes her lack of eye contact as she kept shriveling her gaze away.

"do it let's do it" she whispered.

He popped the pill back as he grunted and coughed. The sour taste hitting his tongue and spreading. He struggled and coughed as he unbuckled his belt. His blood pooling down below as sablique lifted up her oversized t shirt. Lowering her shorts and revealing her panties.

Don thrusted his pants off as she saw it. His bulge was considerably larger. Probably twice the size she had ever seen at around 6 inches. "Oh my gosh Donny look at you."

He whimpered as he unfurled his underwear letting it drop to the ground. His cock spilling forward as it strained. It was already throbbing and twitching as it continued swelling larger. His hands danced around it as he wanted to relieve the pressure behind it, but he resisted.

"are you re reaDy" he strained out his face wincing as he felt the pressure grow. His dick heating up around 8 inches long now.

Sablique lowered her panties down her leg as she inched towards him. Guiding his member inside of her as he grunted. The pleasure of the event almost making himself lose his composure In the first stroke.

He started thrusting as soon as his member cooled off enough for him to continue. Sablique gasped as she tried to stifle her noise. His dick pushing further than it ever had before. She could feel it surging and strectching inside of her as her body was pushed against the door. She wrapped her hands around his back clawing at him as she moaned.

Surely a couple of heads were turning on the other end of the wall as she tried and failed to contain herself.

"you gotta be quiet sabby or else we're gonna get a lot more heat for this"

She whimpered in reply her eyes rolling in their sockets as she panted. He continued pushing inside of her as he began grunting. "I can't hold it much longer are you ready."

Sablique nodded as she began to speed up her moaning. Her body pulsating and heating up with every thrust. She shit her moth tight as her moans began to become louder. Donovan thrashed in and out as he grunted. His shot shooting off into her as she started to come down from her high. She clawed deeper against his back as her knees gave out underneath her.

As she stood back up they both came down from their highs. His member shrinking down to a more modest 6 inches. " How long is this guy gonna last" she poked at him as she stared.

"package said 16-20 hours so we will have to see" he bent down picking his pants off the floor as she bent to start raising her shorts and panties up.

Her body twitching and shaking slightly as if she had just experienced an earthquake. "What was that"

"what was what" Don said as he turned to watch her spring up.

Sablique grunted as her body shot up. Her legs growing out from under her as she raised above Donovan and ul towards the doorframe. Her sleeves raced up her arms going to her elbows. Her former oversized tee barely fit her as it turned skin tight and into a crop top. Her shorts button popped off into Donovan as they snapped off and down her long legs. Her panties straining against her widening hips as they both watched her shoot taller. Her head resting just below the frame of the door.

"that was so hot" Don muttered.

"no it was not what the fuck did you do to me."

Don hugged her waist as he pushed his head into her belly. She could see his member growing harder underneath his jeans as he pressed I to her. "I don't know but I could go another round"

"NO NO NO I'm not gonna go again I'm like 8 ft tall this isn't normal Donovan figured out what happened." She said through gritted teeth trying to avoid alerting the others

"okay okay just sit tight let me look up the side effects on their web sight just don't do anything stupid"

"like I'm the one who caused all of THIEEEEEEK"

Her shirt grew taught as she grew upwards. Her collar choking her as she gasped. Her face straining

Her panties snapped off into the ground as her shirt tore down her back. She moaned as he bra popped off after her boobs swole over it. Her bra hitting dons phone as he stared back up "fuck you're so hot right now." Donovan I swear focus on the task at handDoh"

She recoiled down as her head hit the ceiling. She bent forward as she rubbed her head. "I'm like ten ft tall how did this happen."

"I don't know it doesn't say anything no warnings no labels not even a side effect other than some headaches afterwards. It's not even that bad I'll get you some clothes and we can leave "

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN LEAVE. I'm like 10 ft tall everyone is gonna notice me trying to leave plus how do we know it even stopped yet."

"I don't know I'm sorry we'll figure this out just let me sneak past you real quick."

Sablique shoved her hips to the side as she tried to scooch out of they way. Her butt and hips knocking foodto the floor as Donovan tried to slip past her. Her body tingled again as her face turned giant "fuck Don move quickly" her body shaking and trembling as he jumped for the door. Mid jump she grew again as she yelped. Her shriek piercing the door as several people turned their heads.

Her hips sandwhiched Don into the rack to his side. Forcing him back against the opposing wall as she grew. "Ahhh fuck aaaahahh help me" she shrieked as her head bounced I toths ceiling again. Her neck bending as the plaster croaked and bent. Her shoulders quickly pushed into it as well as she shoved her knees down. Her feet planting In to the door as she dropped to her knees. Her boobs smothering Don as he was forced backwards. His erection throbbing as his now 12 inch dick poked out his pants. She stared down as his member poked it eye up at her. "Seriously geta hold of yourself " I can't control it! " He muttered as he began climbing.

"let me out before you crush me in here." "Why do you think I'm trying to do.

He smooshed his way past as sablique shoved her body to the wall. Several racks collapsing and falling as she turned her body. Her head and back bending at the far wall as her butt landed on the tile below. Her knees bending upward as she sat or tried to sit in the enclosed closet.

Bang bang bang "is everything okay in there sab."

"yeah everything is fine I'm just clumsy is all. I'll be out in a moment"

Don looked back at her. "Great lie there"

She scoffed. "You're the one who got us I to this plus you better get out before I.." she winced. Don's face dropped as he flew to the door. Jumping through it as he opened it and slammed it behind him leaving sablique behind.

Meanwhile she squirmed and strained as her body twitched and shook

"no please no not here. Why won't it stop why can't I stop. She groaned as her body pressurized.

She could hear on the other end her father yelling at Donovan his *indecency being the main subject"what were you and my daughter doing in there." Her mother could be heard stifling a cry as she entered scene.

Her body shook more violently as she tried to suppress it. The entire room shaking as she strained inside. "Sablique come out here right now"

"I'm KiNDa bUsy JUsTt giVe ME A SecoNd daDd."

She moaned as her body lighted up. Her body spasming harder and harder. She shut her face tight as she whimpered her entire body heating up wave after wave. "Fuck I'm gonna cum please no not here"

Her feet planted against the door as it groaned. Her head hitting the ceiling as she strectched

Mm mmmma mmmaaaa aaah aaaahh FUCK"

Her eyes rolled back into her head as she orgasmed. Her feet smashing through the door as her legs grew out into the kitchen. The wall behind her groaned and creaked as it shattered backwards. Her cleavage and head rushing into the dining room behind her. She stared up at the ceiling as the cries of several family members were heard as she exposed herself to all her relatives. "Sorry I'm sorry I can't seem to.. StOooOp"

Sablique shot up again as she shrieked. Her feet growing out further into the kitchen. Smashing the counters and sink in one go as she felt several people run past and over her legs. Her knees bent upwards as her feet anted into he structural wall. Her head shooting further out into the dining room kitchen as she knocked it over. Her arms sprawling out across the room as she tried to cover herself. Her hips widened still stuck in the pantry as she watched the remaining walls ceack and bend outwards.

Don was first to rush next to her as he stopped. "Babe what can I do what can"

"GET OUT OF HERE.. QUICKLY" she moaned as she surged again. Her hips amazing the pantry to pieces as her head surged backwards. Her knees scraped the ceiling as she bent her legs sideways to fit inside. Her cleavage similarly bent I to the roof above as it smashed outwards. Her celave billowing over her as she still tried to confirm her breasts. Several more family members rushing past and out as she saw a couple of flashes from behind her. "Pervs" she muttered as she felt her body twinge again "uh oh"

Her mother ran into her."sablique stop this right now I will not tolerate th..." Another shriek filled the room as her boobs punched into the attic. Her head smashing into the far wall. Her feet punched out into the backyard as she bent her head forward as her head tried to collapse the wall. "Mom I think it's time for you to leavethe house began creaking around her as it started to fail. She saw the final people rush out as her body trembled again." Fuck no please"

"hold it back come onnn u got this iii camn do IT AaaAaAaAAaaahmmff.

She nearly doubled her height in moments. Her head racing outside as the wall behind her collapsed. Her boobs billowed out throughthe house roof as her hips and butt filled half the interior. Her feet racing into the neighbors yard as she punched throughthe fence.

The house creaked and fell around her as it started to cave in. Sablique sat up as she tried to avoid the crowd behind her. Her body collapsing the rest of the house as she sat in front of the group. Still covering herself with her arms. Her cleavage bulging over her hand as she strained against her growing bust.

"umm sorry"

She said awkwardly as she stared at the crowd no taller than her ankle.

A shriek filled the air one final time. Sablique winced as she thought she was about to grow but nothing came. She opened her eyes as she stared at her mother who was in turn staring at Donovan. His dick two feet long and throbbing as his clothes tore off of him his body surging two ft taller. "You gotta be kidding me" she rolled her eyes as Donovan surged another foot taller as the crowd began dispersing away from the two of them

[nameuserlee]

Sylus — Night of Secrecy 💋❤️

❤️- Screenshots -❤️

❤️ - Kindled scene below the cut + my thoughts/rambling -❤️

.

.

.

Uhm. Wow. Just, wow. My sincere congratulations to Sylus and MC, the kiss card finally came and so did they, hallelujah.

I still can't believe this card is real, though. I'm genuinely dizzy, and I mean that in the best possible way. Because it’s sooo perfect. 10/10. No notes. Would swipe for again in a heartbeat.

I didn’t really know what I wanted their first kiss to look like. But I know that whatever I could’ve imagined wouldn’t have been nearly as good as this was. Now let me yap about this!

MC finally gets to bring Onychinus' leader to her place! After learning he needs a place to crash for 3 days before leaving for “business”, MC very generously offers her apartment as a safe house, both to keep him close and to figure out where he’ll be going since he won’t tell her (for her safety, of course).

And my god, these 3 days of them living together are the cutest, most domestic thing I’ve ever had the pleasure to read.

Shopping for groceries together, getting him his own pair of house slippers, him using (all of) her body wash. Sylus being in her space feels right, despite the smaller doorframes and treacherous bathroom cabinets.

(Grown ass man needs us to blow on his boo-boo. ADORABLE.)

But nevermind how cute this is, the situation is still unusual. Sylus and MC’s worlds kinda clash, despite how well they now get along and how much they care for each other. They are both aware of this, and no matter how fun this little play-pretend is, it’s going to have to end soon.

On their drive to the supermarket, Sylus prompts MC with a question: “When you’re in danger during a mission, do you think of anyone?” And the exchange that follows means a lot to me.

“But after my dirty work is done, I’ll wash my hands before going home.” I need this line tattooed across my forehead.

Sylus can’t leave his life back in the N109 zone, but he also doesn’t want to give up MC. And above all else, he wants to keep her safe. He tries to keep her away from his actual “business” as much as he can (which explains why he refuses to tell her where he’s going after their 3 days together).

If it weren’t for the N109 zone being risky for him to stay in right now and MC very conveniently proposing her place, he definitely would’ve found somewhere else to crash.

And so his best way to protect her while indulging their desire to see each other is to promise to “wash his hands before going home.” Whenever he gets to come back to her, he is not bringing his work to her. He will not allow himself to carelessly “taint” her life with his lifestyle. Very sweet, very thoughtful, very mindful (are we still saying mindful in 2025?) .

I’m gonna fast forward to their last night together/the kindled scene because I fear I could talk about every single line in this card.

Where to even begin.

BEST PROMPT IVE EVER SEEN ARE YOU KIDDING ME??

MC initating the kiss means everything to me. Thinking back to their first meeting, it’s him forcing her to resonate with her. Now, she’s pretty much the one who sets the pace in their relationship, which leads to this beautiful first kiss. It’s just too good.

“You really don’t want me to leave?” NO SIR SHE WANTS TO CLIMB YOU LIKE A TREE SHE WANTS YOU BAD and there’s no more denying it. She’s been worried sick throughout the whole card about him, trying to make the most out of their time together, and now that it’s down to the last hours, she wants it all.

And when things start to get heated, our consent king doesn’t only ask her once, but TWICE if she wants to do it.

And it’s soooo HOT!

In the kindled, he hopes MC hasn’t changed her mind, since she kinda nudges him away right after saying yes. He wants this to happen just as badly, but no matter what he’s always, always going to put her first, and so he checks in again with her.

Is this the bare minimum? Well yes! But I still think it’s worth noting. Especially if, again, we compare to how cold he was with her at the beginning of the relationship and how he was forcing her to go along with what he wanted.

Consent is sexy, asking for confirmation is hot as hell. 12/10 would smash again.

[stars-n-spice]

Thanks for the tag! 🩵💫

Last Song: We Did It!!! by grandson

Favorite Color: Slate Blue my beloved <3

Last Book/Fic: Oof,, I have no idea. I haven't been reading anything at like ALL. Honestly it was probably The Odyssey because I've been obsessed with the EPIC Musical and I never actually had to read the poems for English so I was like "Might as well read it now."

Last Movie: Gladiator II (I think? My memory fails me.) - a great movie though! I had a lot of fun watching it with my family.

Last Show: Bob's Burgers! Hands down one of my favorite shows. I had to write a spec script for it this past semester but I'd never seen the show before so I started to binge-watch it and just fell in love with it.

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: Ooof, if 'salty' was on this list, I'd go with that - but since it's not then savory, maybe? As much as I love sweets, it can make my stomach hurt and while my spicy tolerance is a LOT better now, it's nowhere near where it should be for someone who's Korean and Mexican </3

Relationship: Single and will probably be since I'm aroace and don't have plans to be in one unless Wrecker magically walked into my life

Last Thing I Googled: "Slate Blue" to double check that was the right shade of blue, lmao

Current Obsession: EPIC the Musical! Haven't been able to stop listening to it and when I listen to something else it's like a physical struggle for me. That and probably my own OC lmao. I'm finally going to start watching Arcane though and I just KNOW it's going to take over my life.

I Look Forward to Telling You: I too am bad about this stuff and there are so many cool people on here and you're all wonderful but alas, I am a coward. Maybe a resolution for me should be to reach out to more of y'all, but just know that if you see this, I think you're lovely. 🩵

NPTs: @here-comes-the-moose, @stardume, @w31rd0-art1st, @the-starry-seas, @youngandlavendermenace, @fwitolei, @nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius

10 people I’d like to get to know better

10 people I’d like to get to know better

Since I had two separate tags in this, @spaceyjessa and @laughhardrunfastbekindsblog I decided I would make a separate post.

Last song:  with lyrics: Beautiful Boy by The Last Dinner Party (I found out about this band like two weeks ago and now I’m going through a phase I’m obsessed)

Without lyrics: I am ready by Kevin Kiner & Sean Kiner: from the bad batch season three soundtrack. Been listening to it a lot lately, as it feels pretty prevalent to the time of my life that I’m at

Favourite color: light pinks and baby blues

Last book/fic: the last book I finished was defy the storm, by Tessa Gratton (I’m getting closer and closer to being caught up on THR)

Fic: Mace Windu fixes the timeline (You should read it, it’s wonderful) 

Last movie: the rise of Skywalker (yes, I love the sequel trilogy and what about it 💅)

Last show: the bad batch... I’m re-watching, again... how predictable 🙄

Sweet/spicy/savory: I have a big sweet tooth, especially when it comes to chocolate

Relationship: single real life, but in love with countless fictional characters inside my head🤩

Last thing I googled: what does the quest cookies and cream protein bar taste like? (look, I have arfid. I can’t just buy new things to try without knowing exactly what I’m getting into first)

Current obsession: Star Wars, duh! Specifically clones and TBB, the Mandalorian and the high republic

I look forward to telling you: that if you’re reading this you’re wonderful

No pressure tags (and I’m sorry if you’re being tagged again)  @clonethirstingisreal @eobe @dystopicjumpsuit @sunshinesdaydream and anyone else who would like to.

[pastafossa]

I love you guys. I hope you know that.

Like.

Ok so I posted the new TRT chapter the other day. Obviously. And I had to force myself to do it, to click that final, 'post' button because at that last moment, this big wave of imposter syndrome hit (that had already hit on and off as I'd started working on the chapter again). And it was just this cycle of, 'It's been like 6 months since you posted a chapter or anything other than a couple one-shots and you're out of practice, I bet it's bad, it's probably terrible, I bet everyone's left and no one cares about this thing you love so why do you? What if no one likes it, you're gonna drop this and everyone's gonna god 'wtf is this, pasta? what happened?'' And so I forced myself to post it, took my meds to ensure I slept, and then kinda just bunkered down and slept/hid because I was halfway convinced that all the trauma in the previous six months had just bopped any ability I had to write.

Instead I got this outpouring, of just like, 'WELCOME BACK' and people telling me they're happy that mom is ok (which made me cry but in a good way) and they're sorry Cato passed away (more tears, but comforted tears), but also delightful jokes about the funny lines I put in or screaming over that romantic line or about missing Jane and the dynamics and comments about being eager for the next chapter, and how now I can be one of those AO3 authors with those notes of 'yeah my life blew up so I was delayed, but hey I'm back!' which... yeah. And much like when I first started TRT, I didn't... really expect that at all, and it's made me really emotional.

So if you've dropped into my ask box or the comments or the replies, seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you, because the excitement and love and just you all being the best little fam and continuing on this journey of TRT with me - a journey that has now included both Matt and Jane's journey, and a real life journey through a pandemic, a huge move, a passing of two of my pets, my mom's hospitalization and recovery, some heart issues, the cancellation and resurrection of the show, me meeting Charlie Cox and getting him to hold a red thread, my first wood carving event, etc - and I know I say this a lot, but you all really, really help me keep going when things get hard. I'd write TRT for nothing, I would, because I love this story and I intend to see it through, but ya'll just... I love you all tons. I'm hoping to get through the asks and fic comments and replies in the next few days, but I just wanted you guys to know that.

[saltynsassy31]

Frye Fest - Final Countdown

<- Previous - Part 19 - Next ->

[19/20]

♡Back when it was just us♡

👋Team Paper👋

Splatfest World Premier 27-08-2022

[Master Post - coming soon]

[xxplastic-cubexx]

hello!! i just want to tell you that your art is so goddamn scrumptious, you are literally feeding my xmen brainrot and I find myself smiling when i see your art come across my feed. I love how you draw charles, pretty privilege and post (lets be fr he's serving every time)

i hope you always have fantastic brainrot and id kiss your blessed hands for giving us the gift of cherik and charles xavier, you are literally an icon

hope you have a great day ahead of you and more!! you deserve it !!

well i'ma absolutely have a wonderful mornin after readin this AWWWW thank you so so much !!!! i haven't been postin xmen long, so it's been really heartwarmin seein the warm reception to my work in the wonderful tags people have been leavin on my posts- and especially gettin to answer the lovely asks y'all've been sendin in (❁´ ▽ `❁) !! im glad people also like my goofy text posts and esp quotes from my brother he really has no right being so funny at the most random times

i hope to be xmen posting a while: ive got at least 60 years worth of stuff to look through and ongoing, so i dont imagine my interest'll wane anytime soon :]] !!

[chromxena]

joined a local choir and ah, singing with other people is just so fun and nice and beautiful <3

[bikananjarrus]

two years of production between 8 episode seasons is killing television fr

[pepprs]

last few hours in boston :(