#come on my guy let asmo show off his manicure

[adrianasunderworld]

I can always count on Lucifer to kill the mood.

[moemoemammon]

Brothers reaction to MC suddenly holding their hands to compare the size difference uwuwuwu

Hand Size Comparison

(Feat. GN!MC and the Demon Bros)

✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

Lucifer

As always, he asks for your company while he’s busy with his endless amounts of paperwork. You watch him scribble away and the knot on his brow starts becoming tighter and tighter, but you’re more focused on the old man’s hands.

They’re gripped around his feather quill, and you decide they’d look much better gripping your hand, so you take Lucifer’s hand and watch his eyes go wide

Casually pull that glove off and his hands are hella cold but big. Long fingers gently close around yours once he gets used to the contact, and his grip feels weary.

His skin is a little dry, and fingertips slightly calloused from gripping pens and flipping papers. The red of his nails makes his skin look even paler to you.

“Your hands are quite warm, MC. Taking off my glove like that, and in the middle of my work, too... Were you that desperate for my attention? Or maybe you noticed how tired I am, and you’re comforting me? Either way, I’m happy to take a break and spend my time with you.”

Mammon

He’s in the middle of scrolling away on his D.D.D., so you make better use of his hands and grab it into yours. Naturally Mammon nearly has a heart attack.

Gets all grumbly and ""annoyed"" with you, saying this and that about how you’ve gotta warn a guy before you go grabbing his hand, but makes no actual effort to pull away from you.

Warm hands and kinda soft, and bigger than you expected. His nails are nearly trimmed and painted, but you know that’s thanks to Asmo. 

His grip closes around your hand and it feels nearly impossible to pull away, despite how careful he’s being not to hurt you. Leave it to the Avatar of Greed to have a grip game this strong-

“What’re ya lookin’ at my hands like that for? If ya wanted to hold em, y-ya just gotta say somethin’. And you’re only allowed to hold MY hand, got it?”

Levi

His hands only know one thing, and it’s gaming. Eons of clicking away at buttons and abusing joysticks makes for quick hands. Not quick enough to get away from yours, though.

You grab his hand while he’s got his eyes on the latest episode of Ruri Hana, and Levi almost ascends to heaven right then and there.

It’s covered in light callouses, and his fingers are slender and long, knuckles prominent. It’s still larger than yours though, and cracks when he flexes it.

Clammy hands don’t even attempt to close around yours. He’s too focused on trying to figure out what you’re doing!

“This is way too much stimulation, MC! I’m gonna need a warning- no, a WEEK’S notice before you do that! Th-there’s no way I’m even at the skill level that’ll let me do this sort of thing, and- Huh? Wait, don’t let go just yet-!”

Satan

Flipping through the pages of a book and barely notices when you grab his hand, until he attempts to turn it again and finds he?? can’t??

oh. O H. Satan’s not normally one to be flustered but that caught him off guard. His eyes are a little wide, but he doesn’t attempt to pull back. He’s more interested in the way you’re studying his hand without a word, and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t kinda like it.

His fingertips are rough from ages spent trailing along book pages. Hands are kinda smaller and his fingers are shorter than you expected now that you compare, but they’re nearly hot to the touch and tightly close around yours.

He gives you and affectionate squeeze and a gentle smile. You know how dangerous those hands could be, so isn’t it funny how careful they are with yours? He’s had plenty of practice handling things with care, since his favorite novels are the oldest ones.

“I don’t mind if you hold my hand like this. I only need one to turn pages with, right? You did surprise me though, but I’m not upset. This is nice.”

Asmo

He’s painting your nails when you decide to lace your fingers into his. Asmo doesn’t mind the intimacy, but couldn’t you do this once your nails dry? He’ll be annoyed if anything gets smudged!

But that mild panic melts away when he sees how delicately you’re handling him, like his hand is some sort of prized jewel. Even his hands are beautiful, right? He’s so glad you’ve noticed~!

His hands are soft and smooth, warm and careful. More slender than you expected, so they look dainty and fragile. 

There’s not a single flaw you can detect, from his carefully manicured fingers to knuckles free of hair. 

“There’s much more I can do with these hands, you know? As nice as it is to have you look at them, I’d much rather show you what I can use them for~!” 

Beel

Right hand is reserved specifically for eating, so you choose to take the left. He never minds holding your hand, so his cheeks are a little rosy and his eating has slowed.

Sticky hands, but big and warm. Feels like a hug when his closes around yours. His palms are a little rough from his exercise and fangol practice. 

His grip is always oh so gentle, like he might hurt you should he squeeze a little tighter. You can appreciate that though, since you don’t doubt it’d be easy for him to pop your bones like bubble wrap.

His hands may be a little clumsy, and detail work isn’t his forte. You know when he’s been up to something by the bandages that cover his fingers.

“Mm? Is there something on my hands? I forgot to grab a napkin, so I’m sorry if they’re sticky. But... I like this. Holding your hand while I eat makes everything taste better.”

Belphie

If he can’t cling to you like a demon koala while he naps, hand holding is a must. No you don’t have a choice in the matter, sorry.

You trace little patterns against his palm, handling his hand gently while you flip it back and forth, looking it over. It feels ticklish and makes him squirm.

Baby hands for a baby man. His hands are narrow and thin, fingers slender while his skin soft and clammy. Warm too, from always being balled into fists while he sleeps, or clenching onto something.

It’s funny to think that these hands were used to kill you, considering how delicate they feel. But his tight grip is nearly impossible to pull away from, and sometimes it hurts a little. He eases up when he realizes that though, and it reminds you of how desperate he always is to keep you close.

“Sorry, am I squeezing again? I guess I got a little carried away. I just have a feeling that someone might come in at any second, and I don’t want them to steal you away. But you’ll stay here anyway, right?”

[gnocchighoul]

the demons brothers + a touch starved mc

Lucifer

If you’re going to Lucifer because you’re touch starved, then you’re definitely going to be close to him already -- he doesn’t let just anyone touch him.

.......He’s also touch starved but won’t admit it, so one of you is gonna just have to bite the bullet and make a move.

(It’s gonna have to be you)

You’re going to have to go about this carefully--make a really good plan and then execute it flawlessly.

Literally just throw yourself at him. 

He’ll catch you. 

Probably.

Nothing says ‘give me affection’ quite like yeeting yourself off the staircase at him, and he definitely understands what you want when you latch on tight to him like a weird little barnacle that he cant peel off no matter how hard he tries dfghjkkgf

He’s really warm and he smells Really nice and he hugs you so tight, like it’s the last chance he’ll ever get, so he’s honestly one of the best snuggle buddies. 

He’s gonna act all fussy about your love-attack at first--just play with his hair and smother him with lots of kisses and he won’t be able to resist snuggling u. Or banging u, but that’s your choice

Y’know, because “demons can’t resist temptation” and all that jazz. 

(tbh he just likes likes you alot)

Mammon

...Why are you staring at him like you wanna eat him?

Seriously, knock it off, you’re freaking him out!

Wait, why are you coming closer…? Get Back you Fiend don’t you DARE wrap your arms around him and nuzzle your face into his chest like that what the FU--

...Oh.

Huh. This is kinda nice.

(Just hug him. If you want his affection, just wrestle him into a bear hug and don’t. let. go.)

At first, Mammon doesn’t really understand affection that isn’t along the lines of a friendly/loving punch. He’s not used to kindness. It’s a fucking tragedy. 

He doesn’t know how to ask for love because I don’t think he even realizes thats an option, tbh. 

He’s kind of like an unsocialized puppy--will definitely put up a fight until he realizes that, hey, being snuggled is nice.

Luckily for Mams, you are touch starved and determined to show his stupidass what affection is supposed to be like. 

He’s going to get so blushy. Sooo blushy. He totally pretends to not like it at first, but inside he’s over the fucking moon happy.

It takes him a while, but eventually, he realizes that he can ask you for snuggles too. At first he’s all “C’mere human, I bet you’re just itchin’ for me to hug ya, so let me make all your dreams come true!”

(It’s a defense mechanism.)

But over time, he eventually seeks you out and just flops on top of ya, and doesn’t feel the need to make a big show about it.

He feels safe with you, and that’s priceless.

Levi

Is incredibly confused about why you’re seeking out him for affection.

When you ask him if you can give him a hug, he expects you to just like... Wrap one arm around his shoulders for .2 seconds. 

Which doesn’t sound too bad, so he says “Um, sure, I guess? I dunno why you’d want to though” 

So when you climb into his lap and wrap your arms around him like a koala bear, his brain straight up blue-screens. 

Seriously, he forgets how to breathe. Don’t squeeze him too hard or he might never restart.

You smooch him on his cheek and his soul promptly leaves his body and is ejected into the atmosphere at mach 5.

This is literally better than Heaven. And he would know, he used to live there.

He totally freezes up and makes a wheezy sound that’s somewhere along the scale of “Dying Animal” and “Exploding Sink”

Needless to say, you create a snuggle monster.

I promise you that you’re never going to be touch starved again, because once you’ve given Levi a taste, he can’t get enough. 

He constantly needs to be touching you. Holding your hand or the fabric of your shirt, leaning against you, sitting with you in his lap while he plays video games--it literally doesn’t matter, he just needs that contact with you or he might literally die. 

He’s very enthusiastic about it dfghkfd

Satan

Look… Satan is very smart. 

But he’s also incredibly dense at times. 

You have to be blunt with him, or else he’s just not going to know what you want.

(Feelings that aren’t all consuming anger and hatred are still a bit new to him--he’s learning as he goes)

Just walk up to him and tell him that you need him to snuggle you right now, dammit. Lay your soul bare to him. 

He really does love that you trust him. It makes him feel all weird and fuzzy inside.

And how can he possibly say no when you set his heart alight?

That said, he is a bit of an over-thinker. 

Worries about crossing boundaries or making you uncomfortable and a million other things--give him lots of reassurance pls

He isn’t opposed at all to cuddle sessions, especially if he’s able to read at the same time. 

It definitely becomes a normal thing to cocoon yourselves up in a really fluffy blanket to read together.

Satan is honestly one of the best to snuggle with because he’s very chill about it. You want this and he wants this, so he doesn’t see a point in playing games.

So yeah, he’s chill! But he’ll also threaten the life of anybody who interrupts you guys 

Asmo

Please, he knows that you’re touch starved before you even do.

Until you’re upfront about it, he’s going to tease you by like, patting your head, playing footsie with you, giving you only the briefest of hugs--just slowly giving you a taste of his affection until you finally cave and demand that he snuggles you properly. 

(Is that a euphemism? It could be lol)

As soon as you ask he’s gonna push you down onto the nearest couch/bed/whatever and just flop on top of you. 

Honestly, Asmo wants You to be the one holding Him. He wants to use your chest as a pillow, and doesn’t he just look so cute all snuggled up to you like this? He totally does, you should take a pic of him!

Cuddle sessions are absolutely going to become a regular thing, and he makes them into a big event each time. My mans Asmo is gonna bust out the candles and the softest blankets and the fluffiest pillows.

If the opportunity strikes, he’s definitely gonna try to bang you.

If not, expect to do face-masks together. Maybe manicures. But definitely the face-masks, at least.

He’s gonna spin this into a fuckfest or a self care session--it really just depends on what you prefer sdghjk

Once you’re in his arms, he will tickle you. rip

Beel

He is the BEST hugger in the whole entire world.

When you approach him and ask for cuddles he will pull you into a hug without hesitation.

I do not care how tall you are, Beel is taller. He will engulf you in a hug and rest his chin on your head and sway you back and forth 

You want a piggyback ride? Hop on. 

Just wanna watch tv and snuggle? Great idea! :D but maybe don’t watch cooking shows or he’s gonna drool on you dfghj

(lowkey I think he would really enjoy watching human movies with you. He found Mamma Mia to be absolutely enchanting)

Want him to lay on top of you and crush you until all of your woes have been squeezed away? He will absolutely oblige you

Congratulations on your newly acquired teddy bear! Please don’t forget to feed him.

Literally just sit on his lap or wrap your arms around him whenever you want, he’s always down for a good snuggle. 

He’s by far the nicest about it too, he won’t tease you about it and he will never hold back from telling you exactly how much he loves holding you in his arms

Definitely loves to be the big spoon but has no problems with being the little spoon either. 

He’s just so fuckimg SWEET

Belphie

Oh, you're touch starved? Perfect. He's been in the market for a good snuggle buddy.

You silly human, why didn’t you come to him sooner?

Don’t listen to what Asmo says, snuggles are Belphie’s domain.

Once it’s established that you two are going to be snuggle buddies, he will literally just abduct you for snuggle time. 

He doesn’t care what you’re doing, he’s going to throw you over his shoulder like a sack of flour and haul you off to his blanket nest whenever he wants.

He just wants you all to himself. 

Will share your snuggle time with Beel tho.

After abducting you, he's just gonna toss you onto his bed and fall on top of you. He's really warm and he really just wants to lay on you. Partially so that you cant escape once he falls asleep lmaoo

He's happy to just talk to you about whatever you want while you guys get your snuggle on, but be warned: he's eventually going to fall asleep. 

Probably mid sentence. 

He won’t wake up when you poke at his cheeks or shake him, either. So uh. I hope you’re in the mood for a nap too!

Get matching sloth onesies with him. He’ll tell you it’s stupid but he’s actually thrilled with them. (Make sure you also get Beel a bear one though)

((part two with the undateables + Luke))

[diavolosthots]

I have 38 minutes before valentines is officially over for me so here are the brothers

Warning: slight NSFW

THE BROTHERS and valentine’s day 

Lucifer:

Although he thinks the day is ridiculous because why is there just one day to worship the most important person in his life? He still goes all out. Now, he won’t be as extreme as Diavolo, but do expect a very nice package in your room with a very (expensive) elegant dress/suit that will match his outfit perfectly. Of course, you’ll be going out to Ristorante Six or any human restaurant he deemed extravagant enough. Upon arrival, he’ll be sure to top off your outfit with the matching jewelry and a bottle of the best wine you’ll have ever tasted. Lucifer is nothing short of class and he’ll be sure to treat you like royalty the whole evening. Don’t even think about lifting a finger, because he has it all covered. To top it off, of course, he leads you into his candle lit room, rose petals covering the floor, and champagne at your disposal, although he’s hoping for the more adult activities before you open the bottle to celebrate. 

“I refuse to celebrate Valentine’s without making you mine, first.”

Mammon:

Ah shit, that was today? Lol he’s going to pretend that he forgot and he’s so good at it that you’ll believe it up until the very end. Before you even have the chance to wallow in self pity inside your room while angry tears are streaming down your face, he’ll show up in his best suit and a deep blush on his cheeks. He won’t be taking you out, no. Instead, he prepared a nice meal himself, after begging Barbatos to teach him how. Is it the best? Eh, Barbatos still makes it better, but it comes from the heart. He wants it to come from the heart. What’s the point of Valentine’s if you’re not the one spoiling your significant other? Don’t worry, he has other, after dinner things planned as well. 

“I ain’t tryna get too sappy… but I love ya, MC.”

Leviathan:

Oh he dreaded this day so much. He’s not romantic or talented in anything particular. Hell, he can barely remember to kiss you back on most days! But he knew he needed to do something for you. Going out was out of the question, so he decorated his room a bit. He put up some Valentine decorations, blew up some balloons, and made some heart-shaped cookies that he decorated extra well. One of them has your guys’ initials on it with heart shaped sprinkles around. He’s both proud and embarrassed of that one. The main gift, though, is a scrap book he put together of all you guys’ adventures together as of now. Pictures, quotes, inside jokes… they’re all saved in this book. Other than that, he really just hopes to take an easy day with you. Maybe some romantic anime and some much needed cuddling. 

“You’re my Ruri-chan, MC.”

Satan:

Satan is a little old school, but he’s also playful. First, he has a scavenger hunt planned out for you. Follow the notes, solve the riddles, and at the end you’ll find an outfit just for you. Sleek and nice, but not over the top expensive or too elegant. He still wants you to be comfy. Inside the outfit, he’ll ask you to come back to his room where he’ll have a romantic candle lit dinner set up with your favorite foods and soft music playing in the background; you’ll notice that these are your favorite songs. After you sit down, he’ll put a necklace around your neck; heart shaped with your guys’ names engraved. He made it himself with some magic so it truly is one of a kind. The night can go however you want it to, although he does have some lingerie/more revealing outfits he’d like for you to try…

“Happy Valentine’s Day, kitten. Let’s enjoy the evening, just us two.”

Asmodeus:

The minute you wake up, Asmo makes it all about you. First, he’ll take you to a spa day. Full body massages, facials, manicure and pedicure, and of course, a nice hair-do that will come in handy later. Well, not really. It’ll probably be trashed later haha. Of course, he’s sure to take you shopping as well to pick your outfit. A tight suit? A flowy dress? Definitely some thigh highs for your later activities! Don’t think this night will end in just cuddling. He’ll take you out for dinner, although he made sure to prepare the dessert himself, which you will be able to eat either off of him or he off of you. What do you say? 

“You’re blushing, MC…. is this embarrassing for you?”

Beelzebub:

Like Levi, he actually dreaded this day. He’s confused on what to do. Isn’t he supposed to show his love, like, always, every day? He opts for the bouquet of roses and a nice dinner at Ristorante Six. Of course, he ordered their whole menu but he’s actually waiting for you to take everything you want before he ever thinks about digging in. Then, he’d love to dance with you, at which point he apologizes for being unprepared, but really, could you hate this guy for it? He still managed to get you a nice, silver infinity bracelet that will look beautifully on your wrist, although he feels like you deserve so much more. You are a god/dess after all. How you want this night to end is up to you, but just so you know, he does have chocolate sauce and strawberries ready in his room for you. 

“I’m still hungry, but it’s a different kind…”

Belphegor:

He’ll prank you. Not badly, just… he’ll sleep through most of the day, or so you think. What he’s really doing is setting up the attic with fairy lights and rose petals. He’ll get a TV just so you can watch romantic movies together. The pillows will be fluffed and a pile of blankets will be ready for you to hide in, or build a blanket fort with, that’s up to you. Before all that, though, he’ll spill his true feelings for you under the stars, dragging you out onto the roof through the window and making sure you’re nice and secure in his arms, where you belong. It may not be extravagant, or even what you wanted, but he hopes you find comfort in his efforts anyway. Take out?

“You shine brighter than any of these stars… I love you.”  

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC’s Half Demon and They Look Awfully Familiar Lessons 18-20

Series Masterlist

T-the season finale… *sniffle* it’s been a wild ride y’all… I’ve never actually written and stuck through with something for so long, so this is a real achievement for me! I really hope you guys have enjoyed this completely weird fluffy/angsty/mildly crackhead adventure! Please enjoy the last part!

All is well, the family is back together, everyone’s fine, the school year is almost over-

Wait, the school year is almost over?

Upon realizing that, everyone settled into a state of mild panic.

MC couldn’t just leave, they were part of the family! An integral part! They were the only thing keeping everyone from murdering each other during family game night!

As for Lucifer’s personal feelings on the matter, things were… tough.

When the exchange program was announced, Lucifer expected it to end like most of Diavolo’s ideas: annoying to clean up, it certainly couldn’t have ended worse than when he and the Crown Prince ended up getting cursed to hold hands for 25 hours straight. What Lucifer didn’t expect was for a child he didn’t even know he had to end up as the human exchange student and for his entire life to be thrown out of whack. That child of his was busy finishing up their final paper of the year.

“Hey, father,” MC looked up from their paper with a cheeky smile. “Do you think that the next exchange student will be as fun as me?”

“I sincerely hope not.” Lucifer sighed, continuing to sift through his paperwork on his desk. “Your kind of ‘excitement’ has completely worn me out.”

“Aw,” MC giggled, then went back to work. “So you don’t want me to stay here then?”

Lucifer stiffened and looked up from his paperwork. “Don’t put words in my mouth, MC.”

“So you do want me to stay. Interesting~” MC said as they began to sweep the eraser shavings off their paper. “Well, if you want me to stay so badly, you could have just asked.”

“P-pardon?” Lucifer blinked a few times to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating. “You want to stay?”

“Since you’d be so sad without me, I guess I just have to don’t I?” MC stood suddenly and slapped their finished essay on Lucifer’s desk. “The sacrifices I make for this family, I swear!���

We stand with you, MC, sacrifice your sanity for your weird-ass familia.

Anyway, Lucifer was thrilled that MC wanted to stay with him in the Devildom, the problem was… MC’s other parent may not have been too keen to just give up their baby.

You know, the demon child they raised all by themselves, with no help from Lucifer because he didn’t know MC existed…

Someone get MC’s ren on the phone! Stat!

“Alright dear little brothers of mine, listen closely because I’m not repeating this.” Lucifer looked over the living room couches at the other six rulers of hell. Belphie was sprawled out on one of the couches and was drooling all over Beel’s lap, Satan was making a point to look as disinterested as possible and kept sneaking glances at the book he was holding, and Mammon was wrestling Levi dangerously close to where Asmo was filing his nails.

Sighing in defeat, Lucifer continued. If any of his brothers misbehaved he couldn’t say he didn’t warn them. “MC‘s parent will be coming to visit.”

Everyone’s attention snapped to Lucifer. Wonderful.

“They’ll be staying for a few days and will decide if it’s in MC’s best interest to primarily stay in the Devildom from now on.”

Asmodeus slowly raised a hand. “Luciiiiiiferrrr!”

“Asmo, is your question overly personal in nature?”

The Avatar of lust brought a manicured nail to his cheek and daintily tapped it. “Mmm… I don’t think so.”

“Ask.”

“How long were you and MC’s parent dating for? Won’t it be awkward to be around your ex?”

Lucifer dragged a gloved hand down his face. “It was a one night thing.”

“Really?” Asmo knitted his eyebrows in confusion. “It wasn’t a long drawn out forbidden romance? You must have had some Olympic swimmers down there!”

“Okay!” Lucifer clapped his hands. “Add that to the list of things Asmo is not allowed to say.”

“We have to take something off the list then…” Beel said through handfuls of chips. “The list’s full.”

“Fine,” Lucifer grumbled. “He can say [CENSORED] again.”

“Yippee! [CENSORED] [CENSORED] [CENSORED]”

The group collectively groaned as Asmo continued to spout his profane nonsense.

“What did I just walk in on..?” MC stood in the doorway to the living room, still in their PJs.

“Oh, MC, your parent’s coming over to stay for a few days.” Lucifer quickly explained.

MC’s face morphed from confusion to horror. “What does that have to do with [CENSORED]?!”

This house is a FUCKING NIGHTMARE-

Anyway, after the initial confusion/horror, MC got really excited and rushed off to get ready. Meanwhile, the boys solemnly swore that they would be on their best behaviour!

Everyone needed to convince MC’s parent that everything in the Devildom was perfectly safe and that their little hellspawn was in good responsible hands.

Mammon tried to come up with a plan in case MC wasn’t allowed to stay with them, and let’s just say it involved kidnapping. But like- a chill kind of kidnapping where MC would be totally fine.

This idea was immediately shot down in favour of Beel’s plan B.

Beel would just… eat MC’s parent. No biggie, right?

Lucifer shot that one down the moment he heard it.

The only accepted plan for if MC wasn’t allowed to stay was just letting them go. They’d visit the Devildom. A lot. Many visits would be necessary.

So, the hour of MC’s ren’s arrival had come, and the student council assembled to greet them.

Greet the human. The completely non magical human. Greet them and then let them see the Devildom…

Was this exchange program really that good of an idea..?

MC frantically attempted to do some last minute fixes to their hair as they sat themselves down in their seat in the Assembly Hall. Ugh… stupid hair…

“Why are you so nervous?” Satan asked. “Is our visitor a neat freak basket case?”

“No!” MC huffed. “They’re not! I’m just making myself presentable so they don’t think I’ve gone completely feral down here.”

“Well, feral no, crazy, yes. Have you seen yourself lately?” Belphie snickered.

“SHUT UP BELPHIE.”

“Would you all be quiet?” Lucifer snapped. “You’re all acting like children.”

“I am a child.” MC snapped back. “What’s Belphie’s excuse?”

Belphie’s retort was cut off by the portal opening and a figure leisurely floating to the ground. They had an open parasol in their right hand that seemed to be aiding their gentle descent, and a large container full of what smelled like cookies tucked into their left side. The moment their toes touched the floor, the human gracefully closed their parasol and gave the assembled demons a sparkling smile and a polite bow.

“Thank you for allowing me the honour to visit,” the human’s voice was as soft and sweet as Cotton candy. “It’s a pleasure to officially meet the princes of hell themselves.”

:D yay!

After floating down from the sky like Mary Poppins, MC lost all sense of propriety and ran over to tackle their ren into a hug. It was that kind of thing where you really miss someone but you don’t realize exactly how much until you get to see them again.

Lucifer was, of course, the picture of elegance and “this isn’t awkward at all”-ness.

MC’s parent didn’t even seem to be all that concerned with the fact that their baby daddy was, y'know, LUCIFER MORNINGSTAR. THE MOST POMPOUS FUCKWAD IN THE DEVILDOM.

Please don’t tell him I said that, he’s still mad about the Go Fund Me…

MC was absolutely ecstatic to finally show their parent how much they’ve grown in terms of their demonic powers and all the friends they had made, but MC’s ren was more concerned with how much they had grown in terms of their height.

“You’re just so tall now,” MC’s ren giggled as they fixed their child’s hair. “You’ll get things off of shelves for me, won’t you?”

“Yeah yeah,” MC said, rolling their eyes good naturedly. “Like you can’t reach anything in your kitchen.”

“Okay,” Mammon, Satan, Levi, Belphie, and Beel were lagging behind Lucifer, MC, their parent, and Diavolo. “Change of plans, we ain’t eatin’ ‘em, we’re keepin’ ‘em.”

“We were never going to eat them in the first place, idiot.” Satan sneered. “And what’s with the change of tune? You were ready to wage war on the human world fifteen minutes ago.”

“…cookies happened.” Mammon mumbled. He had only gotten one of the human’s totally amazing offerings before Beel proceeded to eat everything. The cookie was perfect… so delicious…

“I say we keep the human.” Beel put a hand on his stomach. “I want more human world cookies.”

“They’re so cute too…” Asmo cooed. “A solid 10/10, and that’s such a rare ranking coming from the only 20/10 in existence!”

“Asmo, your vanity never ceases to make me want to roll over and-” Belphie’s insult was interrupted by him passing out and letting out a cartoonishly loud snore. It was a good thing Beel was able to quickly catch and throw Belphie over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes.

“Asmo has a point, they’re just so totally moe! Kawaii to the highest degree! That parasol, the homemade cookies, it’s just like something from a slice of life anime!” Levi squee-ed.

“So it’s settled, we treat ‘em nice, then we get ‘em to stay.” Mammon nodded to the rest of his brothers, who for the first time in the Demon King knows how long, his little brothers nodded back in full seriousness. They were actually doing a Mammon plan! Holy shit!

So, the brothers liked MC’s ren, what about Diavolo and Barbatos?

Well, MC’s ren had heard all about Barbatos’ amazing cooking from MC and Barb’s totally outstanding reputation, so the two got along swimmingly.

Dia. Loved. That. Human. They’re cute???? They’re sweet???? They brought COOKIES???! They don’t seem to be afraid of him at all????? Please be the exchange student next year :D

Oh yeah… he made a rule that said they couldn’t summon someone with kids… it would be cruel to rip a parent away from their child…

But apparently not a child away from their parent cough cough

Other than the uncle squad, MC’s ren got to meet the Purgatory Hall gang too!

MC was being just the most adorable tour guide, but that didn’t stop Lucifer from having a miniature heart attack any time a demon even looked at MC’s parent the wrong way. If MC’s ren got attacked or felt threatened in any way shape or form, he could say bye bye to his time with the one person in the HOL that didn’t live to make him pop a forehead vein. The human seemed outwardly unconcerned with any Devildom oddness and was amicably chatting with Diavolo while MC pulled them from place to place.

“And that’s Hell’s Kitchen, they have good sandwiches, and that’s Madame Scream’s, they have really good macarons.” MC helpfully pointed out the places as they passed them.

A much to familiar trio of voices called out from down the street. Father dammit, why were they here..?

“Hello Lucifer, what are you all up too?” Ugh… Simeon…

“From the sight of the rest of your brothers skulking about, it appears like they’re acting as bodyguards.” Solomon…

“MC? Who’s that?”

Oh good grief… that nasally little voice… the chihuahua was near… Now… Lucifer was a respectable demon… respectable demons don’t tease children in front of the parent of their child…

“Hello chihuahua.”

DAMN IT HE COULDN’T HELP HIMSELF!

“I’m not a chihuahua you demon!” Luke yapped.

MC’s parent daintily tilted their head and looked over at MC. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friends?”

“Right, Luke, this is my ren, ren, this is a chihuahua.” MC grinned cheekily as they gestured between the two. Lucifer suppressed a laugh which resulted in a very ugly snort. It was a good thing the sound was drowned out by Luke’s exclamations of betrayal.

The chorus of “how could you?!”s and “I thought you were over that awful nickname!”s was put to an abrupt halt when the visiting human elegantly offered a handshake to the fuming angel.

“MC spoke very highly of you,” they chirped. “It’s very nice to meet you, Luke.”

Luke blinked a few times, then quickly straightened his posture, adjusted his hat, then shook MC’s ren’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you too.”

“That’s Simeon.” MC jerked a thumb in Simeon’s direction. “And that’s Solomon.”

“Luke got a whole introduction and we get that? Come on MC, I thought we were friends.” Solomon fake pouted at MC after giving a polite nod to MC’s parent.

“We stopped being friends after one of the potions you had me test out turned me into a-” as quick as lighting, Mammon had shoved his hand into MC’s face.

“A-ah, MC’s rememberin’ stuff wrong, nothin’ potion related happened to ‘em. Right, Solomon???!”

Taking the hint from Mammon, Solomon smiled and nodded. “Nope, nothing related to turning MC into a frog for a few hours.”

“Hm, well I’m quite happy that absolutely nothing frog transformation related happened.” MC’s parent said.

“Yeah, must’ve hit their head on somethin- YEEEOW!” MC had bitten down on Mammon’s hand and slapped it away from them.

“I did not hit my head on anything!”

“Yeah,” Beel nodded. “Nothing’s hit them since the Fangol ball.”

“The what ball?” MC’s ren asked.

“The Fangol ball that hit MC a few months back and broke their glasses.” Five of the brothers slapped their hands to their foreheads.

“Oh my…”

“Eh,” MC patted their ren on the arm. “That’s nothing compared to the giant snake at the retreat.”

“Oh! Do you mind letting me tell that story, MC?”

Lucifer was frantically signalling for Diavolo to stop talking but the crown prince was already beginning his retelling of the events. Luke would chime in with an anecdote from an even worse misadventure the two had gone out on every once and a while. This… this wasn’t going well at all…

MC’s ren was… weirdly chill about the whole thing…

“Oh, it’s so nice that you’re having fun, sweetheart. That reminds me of when I was young and your aunt Clytemnestra and I would go out and have adventures.” “Really? You went on weird adventures too?” “…what kind of adventures could possibly compare to being chased by a giant snake in an underground labyrinth..?”

The side characters ended up needing to abscond for various reasons and all that was left was the brothers, MC, and MC’s parent.

They made it to the HOL without issue, which is when Lucifer remembered that he did not put all the cursed objects out of reach… shit.

“Asmo… Asmo!” “What is it?” “Take MC’s ren out of the house in half an hour, keep them occupied in the living room!” “What? Why?” “I need more time to human-proof the house! Distract them, but no funny business!” “Dear brother, for the first time in a very long time funny business is the second thing on my mind! Wait… no, it’s the third… what have I become..?”

Asmo and Satan, super graciously by the way, led MC and their ren to the living room to distract- I mean entertain them for a bit!

Lucifer and the rest of the gang got to work moving certain things around and closing certain doors- shit where was Cerberus?! Did Lucifer forget to walk him that morning?!

So much to dooooooo…

So maybe bringing a human into Majolish and letting them roam around unsupervised wasn’t the best idea Satan and Asmo had, but it sure as heck was an idea. MC looked through shelves of hairpins and bracelets while their ren disappeared around a corner to look at scarves.

“We’re doing such a great job babysitting!” Asmo clapped his hands. “If MC had just been a normal human I bet they’d last the entire year under our care.”

“Hm, you might be right.” Satan smiled and nodded. “Humans are surprisingly entertaining.”

“Yes… speaking of, where exactly is the human?”

The sudden sound of metal slamming against flesh and the delayed sound of something incredibly heavy hitting the floor jolted Asmo and Satan from their conversation.

“Honestly, some people have no fucking manners!”

It was such a different voice than what Satan and Asmo were used to that the only thing that tipped them off to it being MC’s ren was the fact that MC began to giggle. MC’s ren stepped back into view carrying a metal staff that quickly transformed back to their parasol.

Asmo and Satan rushed over to check if their defenceless little human guest was okay, only to find some lesser demon passed out on the floor with an incredibly nasty bump on the side of their head.

“I’ve heard that humans are apparently quite delicious to demons but I didn’t expect someone to actually try and eat me.”

“I-um…” Satan sputtered, looking from Asmo to MC’s parent. “We’re uh…”

“You alright, ren?” MC called from over by the bracelet shelves.

“Yes, I’m alright.” MC’s ren gave the fourth and fifth born a calming smile. “No harm done, well, except to that poor bastard. I do hope I haven’t killed him… that would be such a nasty thing for the poor sales associates to find.”

Okay so maybe the defenceless human wasn’t so defenceless. That was a good thing… right?

“So where exactly did you manage to get your hands on such a weapon..?” “Ah, I come from a family of witches. This was a college graduation present.”

…doit doit seems legit.

The four made it back home just in time, Lucifer and the others had finished human proofing the house.

Yay!

The house tour went by smoothly, everything was all well and good until Beel and Belphie asked MC’s ren to make more cookies.

Oh god dammit the human said they would.

“Oh Beel, you shouldn’t eat the cookie dough raw… the eggs and raw flour will make you sick!” “Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. Besides, it’s best not to interrupt Beel while he’s eating.” “Yeah it might end like the custard incident.” “Custard… incident?” “MC and Mammon ate my custard and I ended up breaking the wall that connected to MC’s room.” “Hunger tantrums, am I right?”

After that it was Mammon and Levi’s turn to babysit. It went about as well as you’d think.

Levi explained some anime plot in an attempt to make it seem like the Devildom was totally safe and that MC and their ren could stay forever no problem, while Mammon desperately suppressed the urge to swipe the cool parasol.

Finally, it was time for the verdict. Would MC be allowed to stay in the Devildom..? Or would they go back to the human world..?

“Lucifer?”

The demon in question looked up from his paperwork and tried to nod in the most casual way possible. MC’d ren was standing in the doorway, Lucifer must have missed their knock. “Yes? Do you need something?”

MC’s ren smiled and nodded. “It’s about MC’s living situation going forward.”

Lucifer stiffened and got up from his desk. “Y-yes… what about it?”

“MC has expressed that they want to stay here full time with frequent visits to the human world.” The softness that their voice had earlier in the day was completely absent as the human stepped forward into the study and closed the door behind them. “I want to know what you think about that.”

“Well,” Lucifer cleared his throat and tried to shake off the stupid sense of nervousness that had wrapped itself around him. A weak little human’s decision should not make him so anxious! “I would like for MC to stay here as well, I think it would be best for them.”

The human raised an eyebrow and twirled their parasol in their hand. “Really now? In your year with them you truly believe you know what’s best for them?”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed. “Yes. I do.”

MC’s ren went quiet for a few seconds before replying. “I see.”

“And that means..?”

“I knew this day would come, but I didn’t think it’d be so soon.” MC’s ren sighed, and for the first time all day, they actually let their exhaustion show. “I raised MC knowing that one day they’d end up in the Devildom. They’ve told me over and over again how much they like it down here…” the human took a deep breath and slowly shook their head. “If this is what they want… then I give my permission for them to stay with you.”

A wave of relief swept over Lucifer as he finally took a breath. “Thank you.”

“Mm… I’m going to have to use my favour though.”

The relief completely vanished as the Avatar of Pride’s blood ran cold. Memories flooded back from the one night the pair had spent together, the human had offered a cursed record to him that he had spent decades trying to find, in exchange, Lucifer let them have one favour. A favour from a demon was like a single pact order, Lucifer had to do literally anything this human wanted.

“Protect MC, even if it costs you your life.” The human’s words were careful and measured as Lucifer felt the order sink in. “You’ll do that for them, right Lucifer?”

Lucifer nodded as life flooded back into his limbs. “I would have done it without the order.”

So, the brother’s plan to make MC’s ren stay forever failed because they were going back to the human world with MC for summer vacation. Listen, it was needed, MC needed to see the sun lest they shrivel like a sad houseplant.

At least Lucifer technically had primary custody of his little heathen! Victory!

MC said their goodbyes to the friends they had made over the year as they prepared to leave for the next two months, it was filled with so many bone-crushing hugs that MC was surprised that their spine didn’t snap.

MC and Luke had lagged behind the much larger group as they made their way to the assembly hall. MC’s ren was dazzling the miniature crowd with stories of just how adorable MC was as a little kid. The half demon rolled their eyes and silently mourned the loss of any cool points they had gained over the year. Their little companion was oddly quiet, MC lightly nudged him and smiled.

“Aren’t you happy to be going home? You’ve been griping about being stuck down here the entire year. Don’t tell me you’re getting sappy, Luke.”

Luke puffed his cheek out and crossed his arms. “Of course I’m happy to be leaving, the Celestial Realm is the best place ever, the Devildom is completely terrible in every way.”

MC smirked and rolled their eyes again. Just let the little guy go on his rant…

“But… I am going to miss you…” Luke mumbled, MC’s eyebrows shot upwards as they turned their head to look at him. “Th-thanks for being my friend down here… MC. You’re… you’re really nice.”

To their absolute horror, MC felt a lump form in their throat. Oh dear Grandfather… the chihuahua was what broke them?! They quickly looked around to see if anyone was paying attention, then quickly pulled Luke into a hug. The hug was over as fast as it began, but it seemed that Luke didn’t particularly care and was more shocked at the sudden bout of affection.

“If anyone, and I mean anyone asks, I didn’t hug you.” MC murmured, quickly swiping at their eyes.

Luke nodded, a small smile spread across his face. “Got it!”

So the side characters left… *sniffle* everything’s okay… the DDDs work in any of the realms… they could still talk.

Soon, it was time for the final sets of goodbyes…

“Come on, Bean, we’re going to the human world!” MC tried to take the cat from Satan, who didn’t move a muscle.

“If you think you’re taking the cat from here, you’re delusional.” Satan’s smile didn’t leave his face, but the force behind his words was almost enough to make MC back off. Almost…

“My caaaaaat!” MC whined, they ended up getting lightly pushed away by Satan.

“Remember, the summer’s a good time to catch up on anime!” Levi advised. “There’s 24 hours in a day, and an average anime episode is 22 minutes long, you have loads of time!”

“I’ll keep up with my anime only if you promise to listen to the Death Note musical, Levi.” MC giggled and patted Levi on the shoulder.

“Remember MC, take care of your cuticles and your skin.” Asmo took MC’s hand and checked their fingernails. “They were an absolute mess before you got here, so I expect you to keep up your routines this summer!”

“Yeeeeeeeeeeees siiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrr.”

“Bye MC,” Beel handed MC a half opened cup of custard. “I almost ate it, but I didn’t. Make sure you don’t skip any meals this summer.

MC jumped up and gave Beel a quick hug. “Thanks Beel! I’ll be sure to enjoy the custard!”

“Bye, MC. See you next year.” Belphie stood awkwardly stiff, not exactly sure what to do. MC pursed their lips, then quickly wrapped him up in a hug.

“Bye Belphie, I hope all your pillow forts are structurally unsound.”

The avatar of sloth snickered and rested his head on MC’s. “I hope you get really comfortable and are fully ready to go to sleep, then realize you have to pee.”

MC gasped in fake offence and swatted Belphie on the arm.

Mammon put both his hands on MC’s shoulders, his face unusually serious. “Do ya remember what the great Mammon took painstakin’ effort to teach ya?”

“Payday loans are scams, witches are scary, bowline knots are the easiest to undo, don’t wear reflective sunglasses to a poker game aaaaaaaand…” MC grinned mischievously. “Any plan thought up by the Great Mammon should be subject to intense revision.”

“That’s ri- hey!” Mammon laughed and shoved MC towards Lucifer.

MC looked up at Lucifer, the pride demon looked down at them fondly. He reached out and gently ruffled their hair. “I’ll see you next year, MC.”

“Y-yeah…”

Lucifer crouched down slightly to get to their level and gave MC a smile. “I’m very proud of you, you’ve been an immense help this year. Thank you for everything.”

“Thanks for not being a stereotypical supervillain dad, father.” MC smiled softly and fixed their glasses. “Loveyoubye!”

MC turned and rushed to their ren’s side as Lucifer let out a soft chuckle.

“I love you too, MC.”

As Barbatos readied the portal to send the pair to the human world, MC couldn’t wipe the grin off their face. Geez, if this year was a metric mess of fun and insanity… what was the next year going to be like? The half demon’s grin morphed into a bit of a smirk. No way in hell their next year in the Devildom was going to be as insane as their first year.

MC almost giggled as they gave their family one last wave. That wasn’t the time to think about the future, besides, MC knew that it would take two insane chaotic humans to be summoned into the Devildom to even come close to the chaos MC managed to create, both on purpose and by accident.

And what were the odds of that happening?

——————

Authors Note: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ITS DONE SEASON ONE IS DONE!

I wasn’t able to fit the Anti Lucifer League stuff into this one, I’ll put it in a separate fic later!

I NOW NEED TO WORK ON GETTING THROUGH SEASON 2 IN THE ACTUAL GAME. To get mildly serious for a second, thanks to everyone who has stuck around to listen to me spout my fic-y nonsense, you all are nerds (affectionate) and I love you.

[beelsnack]

The Obey Me! Boys and How They Cuddle

Because this quarantine got me touch-starved.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Slight NSFW warning for Asmo.

Lucifer: He could feel his heartbeat in his forehead as he reclined (not slouched, he would never slouch) against the back of his chair. He had at least three different reports to write for Diavolo, the ever-growing stack of bills addressed to Mammon was beginning to lean alarmingly to the left, and he had just received word that one of his brothers had broken a stained-glass window at RAD. Again.

The sound of his door creaking open startled him out of his brooding. He whipped around with a scowl already set in place, but his expression soften when he registered the human standing there. They were carrying a tray in their hands, which were wrapped carefully in the sleeves of their shirt to stave off the chill of the Devildom evenings.

“You missed dinner,” they set the tray down on the edge of his desk, away from all of the important documents. “I was worried the others were going to start a riot.” 

“I wouldn’t put it past them.” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. On top of the pounding in his head, he was beginning to feel the muscle in his neck tensing from being bent over writing for the majority of the day. Great, now his responsibilities were becoming a literal pain in the neck instead of just a figurative one.

“Lucifer?” concern laced through their voice as they spoke. “Are you okay?”

Their hands were still planted on the desk where they had set the tray down, eyes trained on him like they were worried he would explode. This left them wide open, and Lucifer was nothing if not opportunistic.

“Come here.”

The human yelped as he gripped them around the waist and easily hoisted them into his lap. Their legs dangled uselessly over one arm of the chair and Lucifer had pressed their torso against his own. He kept them close, encasing them in his arms as he rested his cheek on top of their head.

“Lucifer!” they attempted to wiggle out of his grasp, but both of them knew it would do nothing. “I’m not a teddy bear!”

“Oh? But the job suits you perfectly.”

They huffed petulantly, but instead of pouting, they wrapped their arms around his neck and accepted their fate. “Just ask next time, okay?”

Mammon: “...stupid lil’...why do they hafta...treat their older brother with at least a lil’ respect!”

The door to the living room burst open, causing the human sitting on the couch to jump and quickly whip their headphones out. Mammon definitely didn’t get a little mushy when he noticed their expression go from on guard to exasperatedly fond.

“What happened now?”

The Avatar of Greed flopped unceremoniously onto the couch next to them and sighed dramatically. “Why do they always gotta gang up on me?!”

“Because it’s funny to watch you explode?”

“Not helping, human.”

They started to laugh, but when they saw Mammon slouch down a little further, they cut themselves off. “Does it really get to you that much?”

“Sometimes,” Mammon scratched at his neck. “Even when I’m trying to help, they start taking jabs at me for no reason.”

The human was silent for a moment before they shoved the worksheet they had been scribbling away at into their textbook and closed it. “That’s not right.”

“You’re damn right it ain’t! I’m a good big brother, and every time I -” a light tug on his hair cut him off mid-rant. The human had scooted down to the end of the couch and was looking at him expectantly. When had they grabbed a hold of his hair?

His human was nothing if not persistent, and who was he to deny them? He followed their tugs down to rest his head in their lap, stretching out his long legs. Their gentle fingers kept weaving and scritching in his hair, and his eyes slipped closed like a content kitten.

“You know the best ways to shut me up.”

“Mmhmm.”

Levi: When he had told them what time the stream was going to start, they had grinned and said staying up that late wasn’t going to be a problem. They had high-fived and the human had skipped off to do whatever it was normies did during the day. When 10 o’clock rolled around, they showed up to his room practically buzzing with excitement. It had been forever since they had gotten to watch a live stream with someone!

They had been so jazzed. So why in the three Realms were they asleep?!

And more importantly, why were they asleep on his shoulder?!?!

Levi could feel himself start to hyperventilate. He barely let his brothers touch him, forget about the human! The streamer had said something that was making the chat go a mile a minute, but Levi couldn’t bring himself to concentrate on anything but the weight on his shoulder.

Swallowing heavily, he managed to gather up enough courage to actually look at the human.They were small and fragile looking when they were awake and yelling at everyone, but when they were asleep, they might as well be a figurine. Their face was relaxed, so different from the victorious grin they wore when they thrashed Mammon in a game, or the determined frown they wore when Devildom culture shock smacked them in the face and they were trying to deal with it.

The soft blue light from Henry 2.0′s aquarium rippled across their face, and Levi could feel their slow, even breaths against his collarbone. His face felt like it was on fire, and he was just about to start flailing when they made a soft noise in their sleep and snuggled in a bit closer. They were shivering.

He had watched enough romcom anime to know the proper course of action, but that didn’t cool his blush any. Sighing in defeat, he managed to sneak his arm up from where it had been resting against his side and - slowly, hesitantly, holy shit what was he doing this was a bad idea what the fu - wrapped it around their shoulders and pulled them in.

Thankfully, they stayed asleep. Slowly but surely, Levi’s heart rate slowed back down to normal as he felt them stop shaking. Maybe this wasn’t so bad?

Satan: It wasn’t often that the human lost their cool. They were probably one of the most put-together beings who ever existed. But, as Satan knew all too well, one could only take so much bullshit before they exploded.

“That sorry, sniveling, micro-dicked little cockroach!”

Satan would have praised them on that insult if he didn’t think it would piss them off more. “Who has a micro dick?”

“That guy I got paired with to do the Potions project!” they had begun pacing around the library. Satan had been in enough arguments to know where this was going, so he shut his book, crossed his legs and waited. The human didn’t disappoint.

“We agreed to meet up at the cafe to work on the project after class, since the assignment is due tomorrow and we needed to get everything put together. Not only does this bastard not show up, he has the balls to text me and ‘apologize’ for not having any of his share of the work done! So now I have to do by tomorrow!” frustrated tears gathered in the corners of their eyes, and Satan had to smother the flames of his own anger. How dare this scum make his human cry?

“Kitten,” he said, hoping the familiar pet name would soothe instead of scorn. “You’re going to wear a path in the carpet if you keep pacing like that.”

They turned to glare at him, but their fire had run out of kindling. They sighed heavily, shoulders slouching as though their anger had physically drained them. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to...I stormed in here and interrupted you, didn’t I? I wan’t thinking, sorry, I’ll just...”

Before they could finish their retreat, Satan was in front of them, hands on their shoulders.

“Hey now, it’s alright.” he reached up and brushed their tears away with the backs of his knuckles. “I of all people know how it is when you’re angry, I understand.”

They sniffled pathetically. “Sorry...”

Smiling gently, Satan guided them to the couch and let them slump against him. They were settled between his legs with their head pillowed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat as they calmed down. Satan’s long fingers played with their hair, twirling a strand around his finger.

“Now then, I’m going to need a name, address and photo id of this formerly-alive gentleman.”

Asmo: There was nothing quite like those few moments after a couple rounds of mind-blowing sex that had followed a carefully-crafted seduction. Asmodeus sighed in satisfaction as he relaxed against the soft pillows.

“Mm...” the human stirred beside him, and Asmo turned his head to admire his handiwork. Their hair was slick with sweat, curling along their forehead and jaw like ivy climbing up the side of a house. They were soft, pliant, practically melting into the sheets, and they had the most deliciously fucked-out expression on their face.

“Hello there, darling.” he said softly, reaching up to brush their hair out of their eyes. “How are you doing?”

Confusion flashed across their face and Asmo decided to answer their question before they asked it. “Aftercare is very important, my dear. Tell me what you need.”

Unbelievably, the human flushed and buried their head in the pillow. “...dles...”

“What was that, sweetheart?”

The human resurfaced, but couldn’t quite look him in the eye. “...Cuddles.”

Asmo scoffed affectionately. “Are you telling me that, after spending the night committing all kinds of salacious acts with me, you’re having trouble asking me for post-sex cuddles?”

Before the human could proceed with the inevitable flailing, Asmo tucked them against his chest, one leg thrown over both of theirs and a delicately manicured finger tracing over his pact mark on their hip. He felt them sigh contentedly as they settled down, and he couldn’t resist laughing as he kissed their forehead.

“I’ll have you know, post-sex cuddling is the best kind of cuddling.”

Beelzebub: It was a rare occasion that only one brother was camped out in the human’s room. Usually there were at least two monopolizing their bed. But, Mammon had a modeling gig, Levi had a raid going on, Satan had just bought a new book and couldn’t be torn away from it, Asmo had a date, and Belphie was....probably asleep somewhere that wasn’t their room. Which left them and Beel.

“What are we going to watch tonight?” Beel asked, making himself comfortable on their bed. He had brought a bowl of popcorn the size of their head, and before they even picked a movie the bowl was 3/4 of the way empty.

“Come on, Beel, I didn’t even get any!” they pouted, but there was an amused gleam in their eye. “And, to answer your question, I was thinking horror, since Mammon isn’t here to scream through it.”

By the time they finished their sentence, the popcorn had been vacuumed into Beel’s mouth. The human looked at Beel with a raised eyebrow.

“...”

“...”

“...We’re out of popcorn.”

They snorted, snatching the bowl from Beel’s hands. “I’ll go make more, you pick a movie.”

When they returned, Beel was leaning against their headboard with the movie paused on the title screen. It was some Devildom flick that the human had never heard of, but they trusted Beel.

Well, with the movie, anyway.

When he made grabby hands for the popcorn, the human turned to shield it with their body. “I don’t think so! I actually want some this time, Beelzebub. I’m holding it.”

The Avatar of Gluttony looked like they had just told him Santa wasn’t real, but the human stood firm.

“I’ll share, but I’m not letting you inhale the whole bowl.” they stuck their tongue out and plopped themselves on their bed. “Let’s start this thing.”

The movie started with a demon getting disemboweled, so they knew it was going to be good. The human was situation with the bowl rested in between their folded legs, and Beel would reach over and grab a fistful of popcorn every few seconds. But, in order to do that, he would have to rock himself forward, and as a result, spilled a fair amount of popcorn on the bed.

“This isn’t working.” Beel muttered about 20 minutes in.

“What isn’t?” they didn’t even turn away from the screen. It was just getting good!

“I keep spilling the popcorn.”

“Hm?” the human briefly glanced down to realize that they were sitting among the remains of many, many pieces of popcorn. “Oh. So you do. Sorry, Beel, I’ll move.”

The human had meant to scoot just a little closer so Beel wouldn’t have to reach so far, but apparently he had other ideas.

They squeaked a little when they went from leaning against the cool wall to something warm.

“Beel!” they exclaimed, suddenly finding themself situated snugly in Beel’s lap. “What the actual fuck?”

“This is easier.” To demonstrate, he reached into the bowl that was still cushioned in their lap, plucked out a fistful of popcorn, and took a bite. “See? No spilling. And you’re still holding the bowl.”

They felt like their face was going to explode from the force of their blush.

“Is this okay?” Beel asked, apparently belatedly realizing what he had just done might be considered inappropriate.

“...Yeah, it’s okay. You have a comfy lap.”

Beel smiled. “Good. I like having you close like this.”

“Shut up, I’m watching the movie.”

Belphegor: It was hard to keep your circadian rhythm going when there was no sun. This was the third night in a row that the human found themselves unable to sleep, and they were getting sick of sitting in their room playing on their D.D.D. So, even though they knew Lucifer would use their skin to decorate his office if he found them, they tip-toed out of their room and began wandering the halls in search for...something.

Eventually, they found themselves in the planetarium. Honestly, they didn’t know what they would do up there, but it beat sitting around in the darkness waiting for their body to shut down from sheer exhaustion.

“Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

They nearly jumped out of their skin. “Belphie!”

Belphegor was draped languidly over one of the couches, cow-print pillow hugged to his chest as he blinked sleepily at them. “What are you doing up?”

They shrugged. “Trouble sleeping.”

“Is that right?” Belphie hummed, sitting up. “You’re lucky you found me, then.”

“Why is that?” the human asked, tilting their head. Belphegor chuckled softly.

“I’m the Avatar of Sloth. If anyone can cure insomnia, it’s me.” he leaned back against the arm of the couch and opened his arms. “Come on, I won’t hurt you.”

He kept his voice nonchalant, but they felt him push his sincerity through their bond. He was still so cautious around them. Probably always would be.

Taking a deep breath, the human stepped forward into Belphie’s waiting arms. Honestly, the demon was a little shocked that the human had accepted. A slap to the face would have been his first reaction if the tables were turned.

He curled his arms around their shoulders and cupped the back of their head, gently guiding them to the crook of his neck. They squirmed, trying to get comfortable.

“Hush,” Belphie muttered, voice low and soothing. “I’m going to use magic, okay?”

He felt them nod, already drifting a little bit. Belphie took a deep breath, threading his fingers through their hair. He didn’t deserve this. Didn’t deserve their trust and affection. But he was going to take it anyway.

The magic laced itself through his voice as he sang. It was an old lullaby that Lucifer used to sing to him and Beel when they were fussy children, but the human didn’t need to know that. Almost immediately, they stopped wiggling and settled heavily against him. By the time the lullaby was finished, they were asleep, breath fanning deep and even across his collarbone.

Belphegor leaned down and nuzzled into their hair. “Goodnight. Sweet dreams.”

[haloshornsinkstains]

Happy New Year [Obey Me]

Just some new years sillyness and fluff with Kore (my MC) and the Obey Me boys. No trigger warnings, just a lot of smooches and soft feels.

Slowly Kore turned to the group, smile still fixed on her face as she looked at them all, eyes full of love and happiness. “Happy New Year everyone. I’m so glad I met you all, and I know this year might not have been the greatest, but I’m so glad I got to share it with you all. I hope I get to spend many more with you. You’re all stuck with me now.”

“No.” “Oh come on Luci.” Kore pleads. “It’s only once a year and you don’t know how many of those I have left.” “You’re not even middle aged yet, don’t be ridiculous. Do you recall what happened last year?”  “Yes, which is why this year we’re not doing any stupid timed dates and we will be inviting Diavolo and Barbatos. He won’t need to do anything like stopping time if he’s here with us.” Lucifer sighs deeply and Kore’s lips twitch upwards in a way that suggests she believes she’s won. It wouldn’t be the furthest thing from the truth. She just stands and watches him expectantly, smile never quite leaving her lips as she waits for him to finish mulling over the pros and cons of a New Year’s Eve party. Eventually he shook his head at her, shoulders slumping down just a fraction. “Fine. But this is your responsibility Kore.” The human just beamed at him, wrapping her arms around his waist in a quick hug before she darted off to start planning. Lucifer just watched her go with a tired huff of breath. “How are you even more of a handful now than when you first got here?”

It wasn’t difficult to rope the boys into helping with preparation, for powerful demons they were on occasion embarrassingly easy to convince into following along with her plans. Not that Kore would ever complain about getting to spend more time with them. She split the tasks up as best she could, sending Asmo and Satan to ensure they were well stocked with alcohol while Beel, Belphie (and Levi, when he left his room) were in charge of making sure they’d have enough to eat. Mammon, despite the complaints of the others, was dragged with her to deliver invitations and tidy the communal spaces. And honestly the look of utter delight on Diavolo’s face when she invited him and Barbatos to the House of Lamentation for a New Years Eve party was worth all of the complaints and scolding she had endured so far.

All too soon the house was filled with the noise of celebration, bottles of Demonus and plates of food passed around between guests, with Kore playing a cheerful host as the others mingled. It was nice to see them interacting outside of the constraints of RAD and status. Even Barbatos had relaxed a little, settled into one of the comfortable sofas discussing the finer points of celestial realm pastries with Luke. Kore chuckled to herself, one eye on the clock as she scooted closer to Simeon and Lucifer with a plate of nibbles in the hopes of eavesdropping on their conversation about the Celestial Realm. “I know what you’re doing Kore.” She flinched slightly at the sound of the eldest’s voice before fixing a bright smile on her face and turning with the plate in hand. “Mini quiche?” Lucifer raised one perfectly manicured eyebrow. “I’m sure we’ve had conversations about your unfortunate habit of listening in on others before.” “Oh, look at the time! Sorry Luci, you can scold me later!” She dashed away towards the center of the room, grabbing a glass of specially acquired champagne on her way, leaving a frowning Lucifer and one amused angel in her wake. “One minute to midnight guys, um, there’s champagne from the human world if you’d like some.” Kore called, motioning to the glasses set out on the side. “Or you can keep drinking whatever you have, Luke I’m looking at you.” Luke looked affronted. “I’m older than you!” “You’re a baby.” Kore laughed, shaking her head. Slowly the space around her filled with bodies, the brothers crowding around their human to ring in the new year.

“Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Four, Three, Two,  One! HAPPY NEW YEAR!” The room filled with the sound of clinking glasses and celebration, Kore downing her own champagne like a shot with a happy grin. Beside her Mammon wrapped an arm around her waist, tugging her into him while the others were distracted. “Ya got a New Years tradition in the human world right?” He asked quietly, refusing to look her in the eye. A surge of warm affection, perhaps helped a little by all the alcohol she had consumed in the night, flooded through Kore as she nodded, wrapping her arms around the demon’s neck and pressing her lips against his. She felt the arm around her waist tighten, his tongue gently tracing the seam of her lips. Just as she was about to part her lips to let him in a cacophony of protests broke through their moment, a groan slipping past Mammon’s lips as she pulled away. Smiling softly she leant forwards to press one last kiss against his lips, soft and fleeting. “Happy New Year, my first man.” She hummed, pulling back to face the complaints.

“How come Mammon got a New Years kiss? That’s no fair, I thought you were my Henry?” “It is rude for him to hog our lovely human all to himself!” “I thought we agreed we were all sharing?” Kore rolled her eyes. “I have enough kisses for all of you.” “But it won’t be a midnight kiss!” Levi was pouting now, jealousy starting to bubble up in his eyes. Across the room Diavolo cleared his throat. “But, Leviathan, it’s still midnight.” Twelve pairs of eyes turned to look at the clock, the hands stopped dead on midnight. Kore could swear she heard Barbatos sigh. “I thought we weren’t going to stop time this year my lord?” Lucifer asked, still staring at the clock. “I tried to stop him.” Barbatos agreed. “Well yes,” to his credit Diavolo did look a little embarrassed, “but look! I’ve solved this argument about midnight kisses! Now we can all get one.” Kore arched an eyebrow. “Everyone wants a New Years kiss?” There were murmurs of assent throughout the room and she shook her head, though it did nothing to hide the smile on her face. “Well then, happy new year everyone.”

Levi got a soft kiss on the lips, Kore leaning up to his ear to murmur ‘Happy New Year my favourite senpai’ before he nearly combusted on the spot. Lucifer’s kiss was deep and possessive, his hand gripping her chin tightly as he pulled away and sighed ‘happy New Year, troublesome human’. Asmo’s hands dug into the flesh of her ass as he kissed her, pressing the length of his body against hers, whispering ‘there’s more where that came for beautiful’ in her ear as they parted. Satan, ever the gentleman, kissed her gently on the lips, her hands held softly in his as he wished her a happy New Year. Belphie’s kiss was possessive, teeth catching her bottom lip as his fingers dug into her hips, murmured promises of later in the attic on his lips as he pulled away. His twin in contrast was soft and gentle, lifting Kore slightly so her lips met his in the sweetest of kisses, ‘you taste delicious’ ‘happy New Year Beel’. Slowly she shifted, making her way across the room to the angels and Solomon, a quiet question in her eyes as she stared up at Simeon. Smiling softly the angel took her hand, pressing a gentle kiss on her knuckles as she smiled back, lifting on her toes to press a kiss to his cheek ‘happy New Year little lamb’. Luke had a kiss pressed to the top of his head, his hair ruffled by her hand despite his protests ‘happy New Year little chihuahua’. Solomon pulled her close, his hands sliding down her back despite the whispered warning that if he went any lower he’d be dealing with some grumpy demons, his lips finding hers in a deep kiss that saw him licking against her bottom lip.  “You’re a menace.” She chuckled, shaking her head even as the glares of seven demon brothers burned into her back. “You’re going to get me into trouble.” Solomon smiled. “Maybe that was the plan, now, you still have kisses to give out.” She sighed, cheeks flushed from more than just the alcohol as she turned to the final two guests. If Barbatos was expecting anything it didn’t show on his face as she crossed over to him, hesitantly pressing her lips to his cheek. With a huff he pulled on her hand, pressing his lips against hers in a gentle kiss and a murmur of ‘Happy New Year Kore’. Blushing, she turned to Diavolo, freezing for a moment at the sad puppy look in his eyes. “There’s a saying in the human world about saving the best for last.” She smiled, leaning into his space. “Happy New Year Dia.” His lips were warm and soft against her own, one large hand resting on her waist as he kissed her. He tasted like demonus and warmth. “Happy New Year Kore, I’m glad you were the person we picked.” She beamed, nodding her head. “I’m so glad I’m here too. Thank you for letting me stay Dia.”  Slowly Kore turned to the group, smile still fixed on her face as she looked at them all, eyes full of love and happiness. “Happy New Year everyone. I’m so glad I met you all, and I know this year might not have been the greatest, but I’m so glad I got to share it with you all. I hope I get to spend many more with you. You’re all stuck with me now.” “We wouldn’t have ya any other way!” “I can think of a few ways I’d like to have her.” “ASMODEUS!” “Ahem. My Lord, if you could re-start time…”  

The next morning several pictures were uploaded to Devilgram that nearly broke the whole site. The most notable of which featured the future king of the Devildom with flushed cheeks, holding the human exchange student on his lap, her smile bright and cheerful behind slightly smeared lipstick. Beside him his butler sported a purple stain in a very similar shade on his cheek. Though the comments were mostly amusing, several were quick to point out the glaring figure with tan skin and white hair just visible in the background. It was swiftly taken down, though not before Diavolo got his hands on a copy to add to his small collection of memories with the human exchange student. The other was a picture of the eldest of the avatars leading their human in a dance, not strange in and of itself, but the drunken flush high on his cheeks and the smile combined with the pure affection in his eyes certainly had people talking. Never had Lucifer looked so soft (little did they know). There were more photos after that, Simeon and Lucifer deep in conversation, the angel smiling softly. Luke asleep on a sofa, covered with Solomon’s cape. Solomon and Asmodeus dancing in a way that borders on erotic. Beel holding a plate piled precariously high with nibbles while Satan and Belphie discuss the structural integrity of the mountain of food in the background. Levi in a corner, staring at his game with unfocused eyes while Kore kneels next to him speaking softly. Mammon, expression pure horror, while Belphie and Solomon absolutely crack up in the background. 

The one Kore likes most though, the one she’s saved as her lock screen, was taken right at the end of the night after most of the guests had left. She’s asleep, head resting on Belphie’s shoulder, while his head is pressed against the top of hers also asleep. On her left sits Mammon, his body pressed into hers, one finger held to his lips as he glares at whoever is behind the camera, blush high on his cheekbones. Between Kore’s legs, one cheek rested on her thigh, sits Leviathan, eyes focused on his game console, face content.