#cognizant classic

[untilthenexttee]

Next Tee News - March 5th, 2024

Before a new week begins – even though technically it has – let’s reflect on the week of golf that was. A “Cowboy” wins the Honda Classic Cognizant Classic, Green wins in Singapore, the reality is I totally forgot about LIV Golf having a team winner but Joaco backs up his Masters invite, and last but not least. The kids are alright in Myrtle Beach. Until The Next Tee!! #fightandgrind…

[bmpmp3]

no game trying to do some kind of metatexual morality thing making the player feel culpable for their actions by giving them the option to be nice or kill everyone has made me feel anywhere near how guilty and sick to my stomach Drakengard made me feel when you blast a bunch of enemies on the ground into nothing with Angelus. and it wasn't even About That

[makingspiritualityreal]

Planets in Houses Areas of Interest in Astrology

In my studies, I have encountered an extremely detailed and accurate list coming from classic Vedic text, representing what will concern each planet in a given house.

Note, that certain planets perform fundamentally better in certain houses, but the general state of the house affairs will depend on the condition and aspects of the planet. I will give an example of how to interpret a planet below the list.

Note, that Rahu and Ketu are missing, because their results are calculated according to their dispositor.

Sun

1st House Sun Body, Personality, Health

2nd House Sun Intelligence about Maintaining Wealth

3rd House Sun Intelligent Use and Consistency of Skills

4th House Sun Palaces, One's Kingdom

5th House Sun Leadership, Nobility, Esteem

6th House Sun Government Services

7th House Sun Egotism of Spouse or Partner, Partner's Consistency

8th House Sun Vitality, Energy Levels

9th House Sun Father

10th House Sun Government, Activity, Status, Power, Father's Influence

11th House Sun Titles, Certificates

12th House Sun Temples, Places of Worship

Moon

1st House Moon Body, Ego

2nd House Moon Face, Sense Organs, Contentment

3rd House Moon Music, Rhythmic Ability

4th House Moon Mother, Foundation of Feelings

5th House Moon Imagination, Ability to Improve One's Consciousness

6th House Moon Development of Body, Physical Maturation

7th House Moon Popularity, Public Relations

8th House Moon Change, Adaptability

9th House Moon Father's Popularity and Character

10th House Moon Popularity

11th House Moon Popularity in Groups or Organizations

12th House Moon Dreams, Inner Worlds

Mars

1st House Mars Character, Sense of Right and Wrong

2nd House Mars Mineral Wealth

3rd House Mars Siblings, Peers, Bravery, Training

4th House Mars Land, Houses, Property, Mother

5th House Mars Convictions, Strength of Opinions

6th House Mars Accidents, Overcoming Enemies, Weapons

7th House Mars Challenges in Relationships

8th House Mars Surgery, Battles, War

9th House Mars Brother and Sister in Law, Moral Code

10th House Mars Command, Overseers

11th House Mars Character and Motivation of Group Dynamics

12th House Mars Results of Enemies Actions, Secret Enemies

Mercury

1st House Mercury Senses, Ability to Cognize Experiences

2nd House Mercury Speech, Friends

3rd House Mercury Travel, Discernment, Crafts, Communications, Games

4th House Mercury Relatives

5th House Mercury Speculative Investments, Mantra Practice

6th House Mercury Maternal Aunts and Uncles, Legal Matters

7th House Mercury Business Partners, Commerce and Trade

8th House Mercury Corporations, Occult Knowledge, Past Life Fortune

9th House Mercury Past Life Fortune, Judges, Codes of Conduct

10th House Mercury Employer, Apprenticeship, Capacity to Manage

11th House Mercury Playing the Game of Success

12th House Mercury Long Term Investments, Contemplative Knowledge, Purchasing Expenses, Gain of Lost Items

Jupiter

1st House Jupiter Optimism, Opportunities

2nd House Jupiter Wealth

3rd House Jupiter Spiritual Art, Written Wisdom

4th House Jupiter Happiness, Banks, Fruit Bearing Groves

5th House Jupiter Children, Father's Grandfather, Knowledge and Learning

6th House Jupiter Forgiveness

7th House Jupiter Husband, Wealth Partner Brings

8th House Jupiter Inheritance

9th House Jupiter Guru, Teacher, Ease of Fortune, Grand Children

10th House Jupiter Capacity to Manage

11th House Jupiter Income

12th House Jupiter Mother's Mother, Charity

Venus

1st House Venus Strength, Recuperative Ability

2nd House Venus Food, Jewelry Wealth

3rd House Venus Father in Law

4th House Venus Pools, Lakes, Vehicles

5th House Venus Romance, Affairs, Students

6th House Venus Nursing, Physical Succor

7th House Venus Wife, Mother's Mother

8th House Venus Conjugal Bond, Sex

9th House Venus Father

10th House Venus Mother in Law

11th House Venus Fair Distribution of Wealth

12th House Venus Nursing Homes, Mistress, Mother's Father, Vacations

Saturn

1st House Saturn Ability to Endure Hardship

2nd House Saturn Thriftiness, Wealth from Hard Work, Rock Quarries

3rd House Saturn Servants

4th House Saturn Pets

5th House Saturn Fall from Position

6th House Saturn Overcoming Debts and Diseases

7th House Saturn Appreciation of Relationships, Lack of Empathy

8th House Saturn Chronic Disease, Death, Flaws, Weaknesses, Liabilities

9th House Saturn Delays to Fortune, Delays to Creativity

10th House Saturn Duty

11th House Saturn Elder Siblings, Livestock

12th House Saturn Personal Expense, Loss, Capital Expense, Prisons, Imprisonment

Source for the List - Art and Science of Vedic Astrology Vol 2 Ryan Kurczak & Richard Fish. They themselves used original Vedic Resources for the list, I sourced their material for the sake of Vedic translation.

Interpretation example - I have Saturn in the 4th house and I've always had a good bond with pets since I was a child, they would just appear in my life. It seems natural to me, but in reality many people have allergies, don't own pets, their pets don't survive long, they don't share such a special bond with them or their family situation doesn't allow them one, parents forbid them. Not only did I always have a pet, they were also extremely long lived. As a child, I used to have a hamster that survived 5 years, when the average age of a syrian is up to 3, I had a cat that my mom got but the cat ended up loving me and lived 21 years, and when my cat died, my husband's pup yorkie decided that I'm the love of his life. The pets survive so long, because my Saturn is excellently placed in Aquarius with no bad aspects, so I get to have them and care for them to the point of them reaching the age of physical incontinence. Someone with a difficult, badly aspected Saturn in the 4th would have their own story, but nevertheless the placement would manifest as still having that intimate pet experience in their life.

Another example - I have Venus in the 3rd house and I live with my father in law. I never even met my mother in law, as she has no contact with my husband. Yet people with Venus in the 10th will have her as a prominent figure in their life in some capacity. So this list can show which area of your life will yield a physical manifestation in the first place.

This is how you should superimpose this list onto your chart, checking the individual condition of each planet. Note, that these interpretations are NOT applicable in the Navamsa chart, according to Vedic source.

You can also see from the list, that certain placements produce a particular struggle in one's chart, while other planets produce less problems. I will now make a short list of those troubled placements. Note, that I am not including statements about conditions of given planets, which can turn the mentioned events difficult even for a theoretically good scenario. I am only talking about the houses that give an unquestionable struggle. Interestingly enough, this list differs from the traditional Marana Karaka, and it seems to indicate that even out of most difficult placements, one can build something worthwhile. So I will focus only on placements that bring objective difficulty.

Sun

The Sun has its negative impact in the 7th house, where no matter what it produces egotism from one's spouse or partner. With this position, one basically gets partnerships in life with people that boss them around. But if in a good condition, the partner will be consistent, which I'm interpreting as faithful and committed to the relationship, not looking for outside adventure. So even the worst Sun position has some upside to it. The Sun is hard to mess up.

Moon

Even though traditionally the Moon is feared in the 8th house, here it indicates simply a life full of change and forcing one's ego to adapt, which can actually turn out smooth if the Moon is well placed. The most challenging placement for the Moon is actually the 1st house, where the Moon becomes extremely egoic. From my experience with these natives, it is very true, they struggle to mature and force being the center of attention and their ego blinds them. They are very devoted to their loved ones, but extremely self focused, more than any other 1st house planet on the list. So with Moon in the 1st house you are simply an unquestionable egoist.

Mars

Mars has several gray areas that we will touch on, mostly in Dusthanas. Mars produces results of accidents, weapons and surgeries in the 6th and 8th house, and these are the two most common placements I've seen in charts of doctors. These placements are however not the worst ones, because Mars here has the capacity to do battle where the fight takes it, by joining the army or working with the sick.

The most difficult Mars is in the 12th and 7th house. Mars in the 12th house people grow to always suffer long term from some ailment and that is a result of someone else hurting them. I've seen this in a chart of a person that got injured in their workplace in their mid-life and is still getting surgery for the consequences of it in their old age. More notably, we can see it in the chart of Britney Spears, who has various health issues as a result of accidents through difficult physical work she was forced into by others. This is a placement of physical victimhood from people, who stab the native in the back. My guess is, a strong Mars would endure more, but the event will still happen.

Mars in the 7th house is difficult, because these people always bicker in intimate relationships. They have a karma of constant fights with their partner, as they really try to subliminally achieve domination in a partnership, which is impossible because partnership is about equality and compromise. This placement makes it nigh impossible to achieve marital harmony, unless someone enjoys the fighting, and leads to frequent breakups or one's partner cheating. My mother had this placement, and my only memory of her and my father together is them fighting, and she died single.

Mercury

Mercury is a lucky planet, because it has no obvious pitfalls unless badly placed. Interestingly enough, even Mercury in the 12th house has the power to "purchase expenses", and if well placed, make gains from it. As I know a few Mercuries in the 12th house personally, let me decode this for you. People with this placement have a unique knack to purchase items or property of depreciating value and turn it around. My friend with this placement aspecting her Moon invested long term in buying my falling apart post-communist family inherited apartment and is making her home there, and she also has a fantastic knack of receiving thrifted clothes and tailoring them, a hobby we share. These natives have a talent of turning trash to treasure.

Jupiter

Unsurprisingly, there are no bad houses for Jupiter, as even in difficult houses it leads to forgiving one's enemies, being charitable, or receiving an inheritance.

Venus

Similarly to Jupiter, Venus soothes all houses unless afflicted. Venus is able to soothe physical suffering even in the difficult 6th house, or in a nursing home in the 12th. Interestingly enough, Venus in the 12th in a good sign points to the ability of being fulfilled in love even in the seemingly degrading position of being "the other woman" or as the list says, the mistress.

Saturn

Despite it being marana karaka, a well placed Saturn in the 1st gives endurance and is not the worst placement for it, and other houses such as 6th give it endurance to overcome obstacles too. The difficult position for Saturn is actually the 5th, where it shows decline of status or as the list states "fall from one's position". Saturn has a difficult time in most houses compared to other planets, as in the 7th it makes one lack empathy, which will lead to bad karma in the next life, even in the native blocks out the consciousness in this life, and in the 8th and 12th leads to various calamities. So even the strongest Saturn in these houses can simply endure these difficulties, and hope they pass.

[rose-tries-to-write]

Humans are Space Orcs Idea

Okay so hiii, i had an idea so i kinda ran with it.

This was inspired by me eating an orange and thinking 'man, i wonder if aliens would find it weird watching me pull off all the strings like this' and it kinda ran from there. this might have a few parts later on if i get inspired, but mostly whatever is made here will be odd human behaviors that i think would be funny/interesting from an aliens perspective.

Writing under the cut!

Day 1 in alien captivity

I'll be honest, I've been here much longer than a day—perhaps four or more by now. This is the first time I've been given something resembling paper and writing tools, so to make it easier to remember, this will be labelled day one.

I couldn't tell you why I'm here or how I got to where I am. Most of it's a blur by now and even if it wasn't, I'd rather forget anyway. I won't bore you with that.

The aliens I'm with now are tall creatures largely covered in fur except for the horns protruding from their heads. Of the few I've seen its safe to assume that these horns come in many different variations—one having a pair similar to a goat and another having ones reminiscent of the classic devil horns. (There are two portrait drawings beside this passage, one of a fluffy creature with goat horns and another a slick-furred creature with devil horns. They both have smiley faces.)

Whatever these aliens are, they seem very interested in what I am. Studying what I am, that is. They treat me like an animal, trying to replicate a natural environment within a small cell and giving me food and objects that I assume are for entertainment purposes. I can see them in a window at the top of the cell, watching and writing and talking amongst themselves as I go about my day. Researchers, I assume. Scientists.

I don't know what their plans are and they seem largely uninterested in hurting me or even coming close. For now, I'll just continue what I've been trying to do from the start—make them realize I'm not an animal but a fully cognizant person who would really like to go home soon.

Day 2 in alien captivity

They keep giving me these fruits that I've taken to calling oranges due to their resemblance to the fruit. It has a peel, purple and sectioned similar to a pumpkin, that's thick but easy to pierce. It comes off in the previously mentioned sections like a banana and leaves strings behind like an orange.

This is where the name comes from—the gross and annoying strings all over the flesh of the fruit. It takes half an hour to get them off due to the size of the thing, but eating it with them on isn't an option. Taste aside, they make me nauseous. Best to avoid that.

The aliens seem amused at me painstakingly removing all the strings, like they think it's a silly behavior of an animal rather than a necessary evil. I can see them writing something down and chattering between themselves every time I do it where they can see. A voice inside me wonders if they find my methods odd—the piercing and removal of the outer peel, the long process of de-stringing the flesh, then pulling apart the sections to eat them one by one. The voice wonders if they see intelligence in those actions. If using my fingers skillfully to remove the inedible materials says I'm more than just the animal they think I am.

I've learned to ignore that voice.

The flesh of the fruit is orange, ironically, but more of a burning red shade than the brighter color of its namesake. It tastes oddly like an apple, sweet and acidic, with the texture of a grape. I can't decide if I hate it. I can't decide if I should. For now, it's food and as long as they're willing to feed me like this for free, I'm happy to eat.

[lilacs-echoing]

something I've been stewing on for a while now, but I need lotf fans to understand the book has some inherent racism like a lot of classics. and I feel like that's something we should be discussing more often.

of course the rampant nationalism is essential to the boys' characteristics. its part of what makes them shitty preteens. but the slurs and racist remarks that have been edited or removed in the book are part of the larger themes of savagery that are, ultimately, racist. I've discussed before some more nuanced takes like Jack's red hair connecting him to unsavory depictions of Jews/Irishmen, but there isn't much nuance to this. Lord of the Flies is a book that delves deeply into indigenous stereotypes. and when we discuss/depict this "descent into savagery" we all need to be a little more aware of that.

much love for this fandom but please be cognizant of this, especially if you're a younger fan. always be critical of the media you consume.

[peargor]

Not quite sure if sent the message cause bad internet connection so i'll just paste the whole thing here again incase:

Hey peargor!(donno if you're still using tumblr bt whatever) Let me Congrats ya for your coming completion on Touhou project first (yay恭喜)

Here's the wandering dude from mainland china(typical netizen lol)and randomly clicked into ya website while visiting webrings & link collections.Lotta ideas jump through my head and letme say a few words below: BoTWR's really a good series from my perspective,like,Dispite having gaps when understanding the lore,i still can kinda understand the characters,from core to spirit(Cantonese's partly cognizable for mandarin viewers so it kinda fun when lookin' zoey swearing lol)I guess a variety of mainland audience would like it too.Like,it even inspired me to have a look back into the history and mess 'n hongkong on the "great firewall" and made me sorta think deeply about all these mess……but anyways,here's imaginary non medal stickers：

"Mandarin approved"and

"i concerned for la nation"(just kidding),

and i'll keep focusing on the series(actually the others' quite adorable too,sure it took me a while to realize that you actually deeply involve in internet meme culture,after the shock when i found you do made the pogchamp meme gosh)

Btw Just wondering,did the reading disorder cause you to use more english in written form stuff?

Looking forward for the upcoming new chapters yet a few more words:

1:LIT ' O TOMMIE DESERVES ＢＥＴＴＥＲ Yo

Poor tommy,hope he 'll get a chance to be a man

2:mmm how and what would zoey's dad be…… He's sorta a villain for now but i hope he's just a dude who failed to correct his own fault by force or "internal error"?

3:that color can be some exposure of one's emotion thing.yeah classic "into head" thingy but perhaps it means more deep than what it seems?Maybe Blue represents the sadness,niche thoughts,hopeless rational thinking,Yellow's cheerfully craziness,Red's cruelly dialectical greedin' justice,and BLACK's something unresist-able unless you learn some real floyd's philosophy thing?

You can get some new referencing idea from the old HK's TVB show like "大时代"(The Greed of a man),also some new from mainland that accidentally have more coverage report on hk which apple dailys' doesn't(?),Trust me,gotta be good for setting both character and lore

Whatever,Best wishes on not getting perished by cops!(pretty sure you won't be cause you probably haven't spoke something politically for at least 2 years on the public internet and you won't be caught for drawing "china virus girl?" and political comments too early haha)

PS:Try to get yourself a fan-base besides the old social meida the X,patron,like a mewe,discord group somethin' alike for a better place for talks 'n discussion i suppose?

Hi fellow netizen! I'm sure the mainland would like to read the comics but that really opens up a can of worms that I'm not prepared to deal with yet, so for now I'll refrain from translating the comics.

1: Tommy has the happiest life compared to the rest of the main cast I wouldn't worry too much about him lol

2: mm it's much more complicated, I also think my audience expects a political opinion from me. It ties to my own experiences with asian culture in general. I am very critical, but I think the public expectation to what I'm critical of is kinda skewed at the moment. There's so much nuance to this story I hope people have a healthy discussion over the conclusion of Zoey's arc in the future.

3: Yellow, Blue and Red are the key colours. What they represent is up to your own interpretation. To me yellow is the self/your values, blue is career/ambition, and red is religion/community/family. There's more colours down the road but these are the most important ones. If there's going to be discussions over the story please feel free to create those spaces! I haven't done so because I am the main writer and I would like these things to happen naturally in the future. It feels wrong for me to create a space as someone with complete authority over the story.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on IWBTWR! Sorry it took so long to respond, I've been trying to find the words to convery my thoughts properly.

[artbyblastweave]

Years and years and years back, I was tinkering with a concept that, at the time, I hadn't seen done before, which was to do a Fables or Once Upon A Time-style mass-fairy-tale-retelling in a soft-sci-fi space opera/planetary romance setting. I remember a couple of overarching concepts. One was that the classic Fairy Tales being remixed with increasingly outlandish genres was an actual metaphysical conceit of the setting; the big bad was going to be King Arthur, who, due to his nature as the one who cyclically dies and returns, had become cognizant of all the times he'd lived through the same shitshow but with a wild west veneer or an urban-fantasy veneer or a mad-max veneer or a coffee-shop-AU veneer, and on this-go around, he'd decided to use the planet-shattering imperial might of space!camelot to attempt a suicide run against the entire universe in the hopes of deviating from the script strongly enough to break the cycle. (Note that all of this came from a place of total ignorance of Arthurian lore, which is in part why I never pulled the trigger on it- I felt I had reading to do.) The other character concept that stuck in my head was that there was this tertiary character who was the classic space-western gunslinger- constantly swooping in at the last minute to bail the heroes out, rugged and squinty-eyed, effortlessly laying waste to vastly superior opponents with nary a thought. Through context clues (such as his ability to fly in outer space under his own power) it was eventually going to be made clear that this was supposed to be the setting's version of Peter Pan. Prior to the Space Opera cycle, Neverland’s conceptual gravity as a place that fundamentally does not change allowed it to avoid being reset at the end of each cycle; Peter's cavalier attitude towards life and death was informed by the fact that no matter how many times Hook dies, no matter how many times the Darlings visited and departed, they'd always eventually come back, albeit with mannerisms informed by whatever conceit was currently dominating the rest of the universe outside Neverland. Unfortunately, for the space-opera cycle Hook showed up as the captain of a star-destroyer-type thing and unceremoniously glassed Neverland from orbit, ending the party for good. Peter then finally took the plunge into quote-unquote "adulthood" in order to adopt a vengeful-pursuer role- indeed, he stakes a lot of his present identity on the idea that he was finally "forced to grow up"- but it's of course obvious to anyone who gets remotely close to him that he's only become "more mature" in the way that the gratuitous blood-and-guts Liefeldian anti-heroes of the 90s positioned themselves as a mature alternative to the cornball antics of the silver age; all he's done is trade up to a slightly more involved Juvenile power fantasy, still equally divorced from adulthood even if he looks 35.

[catmomjudy]

There were lots of posts over Father’s Day about Buck and Bobby’s father/son relationship (with the 911onabc Instagram actually presenting them as father and son alongside the more traditional father/child relationships on the show).

Bobby has been pretty much acknowledged as Buck’s “Dad Who Stepped Up” in canon:

(GIFs: @neverevan, @kenneth-black) I collected this info for a reblog I did the other day, but I figured it was deserving of its own (expanded) post.

Up until 6x11, Buck and Bobby’s relationship was fairly accepted but never stated outright. Fans accepted it as part of the “family you choose” vibe of 9-1-1 (as stated outright by Eddie in 3x11). But many signs were pointed out (similar to the way fans point out hints in the relationship between Buck and Eddie):

The way Bobby gives Buck chance after chance, right from the start (1x01), going back and forth between compassion and “tough love”

The way Buck gets under Bobby’s skin—“I made you mad” as Coma-Buck says in 06x11—when he’s doing his best to keep everyone away (S1)

Bobby helping Buck learn to tie a tie (1x06)

The way Bobby jumps on a suicide bomber to save Buck (2x18)

Bobby’s extreme and emotional reactions during the lawsuit arc (S3a).

Et cetera, et cetera.

But what about Athena?

I often see “Athena being Buck’s mom” on lists of things that make people DNR a fic. And I get it: Some fics push it to the point of overt mush, and also tend to be the same fics that woobify Buck (who, as I’ve posted before, is a real, live Adult). And “mush” and Athena Grant don’t really jive.

But I think something “Athena is not Buck’s mom” complainants also forget is that Athena is BOBBY’S WIFE. And she seems to be fully cognizant of how Bobby feels about Buck. So, she quite often makes efforts to support and nurture that relationship.

And Athena rocks the step-mom vibe with Buck pretty well. It’s just more subtle (kind of like it was with Bobby until 6x11, as outlined above):

(Gif: @neverevan, @mattoidmeerkat)

7x03: Why Buck? Why does she specify “Buck” in this instant, if it’s not to imply “If your boy could see you now!”

3x14: This is one instance (I think the dumpster diving with Taylor in 4x11 is the other, and there may be more that I’m not remembering), but, just like with Bobby and Michael, Athena has that “Mom Radar” going and has a habit of catching Buck up to no good. And that look isn’t “Cop Face.” It’s classic “Mom Glare” with a side of “I’m Very Disappointed In You Young Man.”

(Gif: @mattoidmeerkat; Photo: Official still)

6x11: Athena is the only one other than Chris who gets to give a true speech to Coma Buck. The step-mom and the step-son.

2x10: Buck at family Christmas dinner at Athena’s house. And remember that Hen was/is Athena’s best female friend, so Hen and Karen being there isn’t necessarily related to the firehouse. So, Buck has been invited to his captain’s fiancée’s house for Christmas dinner with his captain’s fiancée’s family.

And there’s more!

In 3x04 (the Dinner from Hell), Athena is the one to invite Buck:

Bobby: I still can't believe that you invited him without talking to me first.

Athena: I just wanted him to know that no matter what, he's still family. Thought dinner would give you two time to work things out.

And in 3x10, Athena is the one who Buck calls about the Christmas party. He obviously felt comfortable enough with her at this point to do that:

Bobby: Athena, what are you doing here?

Athena: We came to save you. Someone said you were ordering takeout for Christmas dinner.

Buck: I did vote for turkey. ( Laughs )

(Dialogue from: https://tvshowtranscripts.ourboard.org/)

(Gif: @fireladybuckley)

It should also be obvious from the above gif that that extremely cute photo/gif of Buck from 3x10 that people like to post (and gush over) is Buck’s expression when he’s greeting ATHENA.

Also note that 3x10 is also the ep where Buck first outright stated his feelings for Bobby, so showing his comfort with Athena (and his bashfulness and happiness at being thanked and complimented by her) right next to this is quite telling.

(Gif: @mattoidmeerkat)

🤷🏻‍♀️

(Gif: @fireladybuckley)

[a2zsportsnews]

Rickie Fowler clash with spectator, Cognizant Classic, third round, leaderboard, scores

Rickie Fowler stayed in the hunt for a first PGA Tour win since 2023 during the third round of the Cognizant Classic, but it was his clash with a spectator that stole the headlines. Watch every round of the PGA Tour LIVE & Exclusive on Fox Sports, available on Kayo. New to Kayo? Get your first month for just $1. Limited time offer. Fowler, who sits three shots behind opening round 59 shooting…

[iatrophilosophos]

The other thing I'm thinking about this morning is the limitation of any one analytical lens and poor application of gender theory to interpersonal relationships.

Gonna frontload this post with the caveats that 1) this is about cafab relationships to transmisogyny, which i welcome discussion from anybody on but also recognize some ppl are just not invested in or interested in hearing, and thats fine 2) i am speaking from a place of good faith (classical def.) and assuming that we can take what people say about their intentions at face value and these topics are occurring within relationships with grace and legitimate desire to do right by eachother, even though this approach does not always work and is not an exhaustive or universal lens.

My friend said sumn last year that was really foundational for me--"there's always another explanation [for interpersonal instances of transmisogyny]". Meaning, transmisogyny is the sum of small and big events across a person's life, and for TMA people it doesn't really matter if a partner has hateful or "transmisogynistic" intentions behind an action that contributes to the structure. There's always a self-centered reason that has nothing to do with The Structure. My other friend has a line that I think also fits here, which is the idea that most people most of the time don't really have "rational" or cognizant motivations prior to action, just post hoc narrativization of why they did what they did. I don't know how much I agree, but I think it's an interesting lens to use to think about our past actions that can get useful results--how much of the story that I'm telling about this event got written after it, and how does that affect everything moving forward?

This stage setting brings us to a specific cohort that I've definitely been a part of and am working on distancing from: strong willed/bullheaded cafabs with significant personal needs and abrasive interpersonal tendencies. Being someone that only very aquiescing, self-sacrificing people can stand to be around means you're gonna benefit a lot interpersonally from transmisogyny, because trans women and especially young, vulnerable, and/or early transition women are gonna be a large % of the people you attract.

People in this cohort usually know it on some level IME and feel a lot of shame and anxiety around it. Transfem friends and partners will bring it up. We get one of the good ones type behaviors, compensatory hating and policing of other people, and white knighting; and we get various manifestations of definitional games that all fit into the "ontologically incapable of violence" header. Your classic uwuification of cafabs, but also misguidedly trying to find common ground and misconflating relationships to womanhood (talking abt how ppl treated you ten years ago doesn't paper over the thing You are doing Now), and getting into some really bizarre IME feminist ally dudebro shit that seems copypasted from 2012 cishet feminist ally lines (these are also??? Bad????)

All of this shit behavior can((see above caveat #2)) stem from being too lost in the sauce of structural analysis. I think the line that there's always another explanation has a corrolary: you can basically always, to varying levels of accuracy and usefulness, paint an interpersonal problem in the context of structural analysis. And this can be very useful, and it is mainly useful to people who are subject to that structural oppression to understand what is happening and why it feels bad. I see for my friends theory around transmisogyny often (but obviously not exclusively) function as a frame of understanding that says "it isn't your fault. No amount of personality modification will keep this from happening again. Time to take a different tract." This is very useful and good.*

However: this specific understanding of the function of transfeminist theory does not play the same for this cohort of cafab people, because behavioral modification IS the way to get better about shit and stop it from happening. In a lot of these circumstances WE have to understand explanations of transmisogyny as an explanation for why behaviors, attitudes and modes of interaction feel bad to our friends. Yet a third dear friend has a line in a piece of writing that I don't remember if is published or not that says, paraphrasing: "transmisogyny is not 'real', it is a concept we use to understand patterns and attitudes". The essence of a transmisogynist action or behavior or pattern that we exert towards our loved ones is only that it triggers a pattern and understanding of the world; not that it has a big red "GENDER CRIME" stamp on it somewhere.

If we want to throw off the benefits and privileges of being TME in the interpersonal sphere, we have to get fucking nicer to people. We have to yell less and listen more. We have to interrogate the ghosts of our loved ones that set up shop in our heads and challenge how they diverge from the evidence of the real people in front of us. We have to employ whatever dumbass therapyspeak tools let us be more thoughtful and intentional with how we treat eachother. We have to confront the anxiety that we are Problematic and not imbue metaphysical significance to the fact that we Hurt Someone, because that opens the door to us trying to fix it with yet more metaphysical action and not just going "oh, I need to work on the way I percieve your words because the way you express dissent doesn't immediately register to me and I've been steamrolling you for weeks. Shit, I'm sorry, can I ask some questions that will help me notice next time this comes up and react better?"

Finally I'm gonna end with this: transmisogyny as an understanding of lifetime patterns of experience is not One Thing that applies evenly to every TMA person. One of the biggest pieces of me landing on all this above is being frustrated about how everyone I know has a slightly different bar and I couldn't just "stop being transmisogynist", cuz different shit hurts different people. This is kinda my connecting thread to my earlier post about offensive jokes: once we hit the sphere of microaggressions and non-overt patterns and loved ones that want us to actually work on shit instead of divesting, there just isn't actually a prescriptive answer and we have to be familiar with the theory shorthands ppl around us are using, AND aware of how our personal tendencies and patterns of behavior fit into that theory, AND exercising curiosity and care to figure out what the tangible steps for people we love are.

*note that with all theory I do think that even this framing can get stretched to a point it is no longer accurate or useful to goals I think r worthwhile, but that's not my lane to talk about exhaustively.

[vagabond-umlaut]

ramé 5.0

love.

a word everyone spells as l-o-v-e, except one certain young sorcerer – to whom it appears h-a-p-p-y, to whom it appears h-a-v-o-c – to whom it appears the shape of the letters of your name.

you, on the other hand, forget how to spell when the same word is before you – a fact which, your admirer reckons, would have been a major problem were he not he – that is, were he not the one and only 'gojo satoru'.

and thus begins, the plan.

and thus begins, the six steps to catch one's crush's eye — by the six eyes.

|5/6| splurge on gifts.

[READ 1.0 HERE AND 2.0 HERE AND 3.0 HERE AND 4.0 HERE!]

▸ student!gojo satoru x student!reader; fem!reader; classic example of 'if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain' chapter - grab an umbrella, folks! 🥰 [this is simply a soft romantic(??) angst fest before the happy ending next chapter, ppl! 😊]

▸ find other parts of 'ramé' and other [stand-alone] fics set in the same universe as this work here! anyways, image, divider & characters ain't mine. pls don't plagiarize, translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️

"and what can this be?"

the silver of the bracelet glints, the tiny sapphires in its rim adding a sparkling effect as you show it to gojo. the boy drags his gaze from it to you, lips pressing into a line as he takes in the way you're looking at him.

two months back, if someone even merely insinuated at the fact you might be growing distant from him, he wouldn't have thought once before retaliating with a mean word or hit.

and, to be just, why on earth would he not?

yes, the 'date' he had proposed to take you on post mission remained just a proposal - many thanks to the old geezers and their knack for providing severely understated mission details [bitter sarcasm wholly intended] - but that didn't drive a wedge between you both; quite the opposite, in fact.

two months back, he found you sobbing at his bedside in the school infirmary, lips pressing kisses to his bruised knuckles time and again, while you kept mumbling on how you should've been more wary and cognizant of your surroundings, how he shouldn't have switched his infinity off to guard you from the caving roof and how you would buy him a milion sweets if he promised to not be reckless, but wouldn't hesitate to kill him with your CT if he broke the promise even once.

lovingly overprotective in an irresistibly cute way - that's exactly how you grew to be around gojo in the days he was healing, in the latter's eyes. suguru and shoko's comments too grew less teasing and more encouraging with time then - something which made him think, the feelings in his being might not be as one-sided as he tends to believe at times.

something which made him think, there might not be a day he has to imagine without your radiant grin directed at him, for him, because of him.

yet, now... as he regards you with utmost attention...

the sorcerer can't help but deem the unimaginable to have occurred.

face grim, eyes dull, lips puckered into a scowl, every fucking time you've come across him since your return to school from your home...

it doesn't really take a genius to gather you don't really want to be in his vicinity - a realisation which leads to your best friend of a decade and a few years to shower a torrent of gifts on you.

under the impression, that's what will return your keen undivided gaze to him - an impression, he watches, being tainted wrong with every other second that passes under the fading daylight.

you return the bracelet to its box and place it in the bag, one the boy knows contains the other gifts he had left at your doorstep or sent via shoko or haibara to you, the past month - and one you intend to give him back - 'cause for what else could you have asked to meet him at the training grounds this evening, carrying the bag, if not this?

wishing, not for the first time, for his six eyes to be able to glean your current state of mind, he asks, scooting slowly, deliberately to your seated form on the bench, "did you not like it, shor-"

"please don't call me that."

the grin slowly unfurling on gojo's lips stutters, then vanishes in the heat of the fury of your eyes. he watches your gaze roam over his face once before skittering away. your voice grows a mild tremor, "please don't call me that. i don't want to hear that nickname ever again."

the soda can nearly slips from between his fingers onto the grass below before he grasps it again, firmer this time, and tosses it upside down to empty it into his mouth. it's a brand you had introduced him to, gojo reminisces, on a day just like this... grins and squeals as you jumped in front of the vending machine, so, so joyed that it had your favourite drink.

soon after, it became the white-haired boy's favourite drink too - but no longer now. not when the fruity tang of the liquid, which endeared it to you as you claimed, tastes like the metallic clang of blood to him.

now, many might call gojo overdramatic here - you've asked him not to call you that countless times now, for fuck's sake - but many don't know you the way your friend does. in horrifying contrast to before, a note of revulsion exists in your words.

undisguised disgust paired with loathing.

sharp enough to pierce infinity, past skin, muscles, ribs and layers of tissues and chains, into that stupid organ strumming melancholic rhythms now, your name bleeding raw from its walls.

superfluous, some might scoff - but they'll have never known there's a dark side to love, the one gojo's traversing now. though... the young sorcerer muses, finishing the drink and sending it into the trash can with a flick of his cursed energy, they'll never have known you. they'll never have known the degree to which the boy adores you, either.

a strong whoosh of wind hits the two of you, carrying the smell of wet earth with it. a sign of the arrival of your favourite season, your friend absently notes as he looks back at you.

the tip of your nose appears flushed red.

"and may i know why?"

shock brims your gaze at the soft question. gojo watches you cough up a strained chuckle. "i knew you to be more assertive. demanding. never thought you could request for an explanation... what changed, 'to-" you still for a beat, then continue, burning another bridge, same as the boy feared an instant too early, "i mean, gojo-senpai?"

"you're the best person to answer that," the mentioned person replies with lips forming a gentle curve. yes, the limitless user's always been one hell of a self-assured person - it comes free with the package of receiving god-like treatment by most from before you can crawl - but there exist times when all that - the fight, the zeal, the energy - every one of those just ebbs away from his body, rendering him the hapless spectator, and victim, to the car crash.

except a car crash might hurt less than the careless sneer you shoot his way, coupled with an eye roll. you never gave him such a look in the past, before you went back home for the vacation. just what-

"i think you know why i called you here, yeah?" you ask, picking the bag up and pushing it towards him. the things inside it rattle; the boy wonders if you even went through those two books he sent you. they were from the series you had babbled, ranted and gushed to him on for hours on end on numerous occasions, once upon a time.

gojo nods briefly, though doesn't spare it even a glance. it doesn't go past your notice, he notes, given the way your eyes jump from him to his gifts, then to your fiddling fingers. "well, that's one box ticked off," you say, "and as for the other-"

"i know that too; you need not say every fucking thing out loud," your senpai cuts you off with a mirthless inflection to his tone, eyes falling down onto his sneakers. it was a gift from you on his last-

bloody hell, why does everything have to be a sore reminder of you?

"not saying it out loud doesn't make it any less real," your quiet voice tears through his thought, and he looks up. hoping, desperately so, a tender smile is waiting on your features, reserved for him - only to see every hope of his get dashed into the dirt by your frown.

his best friend was right. gojo's pathetically down for you.

a thunder rumbles in the distance.

you continue, "but since you've asked me not to, i guess i won't. that's the least i can do-"

"but what went wrong?" the question hurtles past the confines of his mouth into the stormy air. and, for once, gojo decides not to conceal the moisture in his eyes behind his shades. removing the eyewear, he moves to sit right beside you, approaching to take your hand in his.

you jerk away from him.

as if you were fire and he, water.

as if you were sun and he, non-luminous scarred moon threatening to eclipse your joy.

the white-haired boy retracts his hand away. you glance at him once before averting your gaze away. he watches you clench your hands in a tight fist. "nothing was wrong, senpai," you mumble; gojo bites his lower lip to keep it from wobbling, "but there's always something tiny wrong in everything going right, ya know? i just feel we outgrew our phase of being friends."

the growl of thunder sounds closer this time. a drop of water lands on his thigh - the sorcerer doesn't bother to know if it is his eyes or those clouds above which finally welled over. voice thickening and breaking, a scoff leaves him, "you know, as well as me, that's the lamest excuse ever. and you called us being friends, right?" you take a moment then nod weakly. a pained sigh leaves him, "then what happened to being open with each other, hm? i thought we kept no secrets from each other."

the boy watches you keep your gaze stubbornly trained on the grass beneath. something within him breaks.

"c'mon, don't play dumb," gojo urges, plopping down onto the object of your attention, just so he can have a better view of your face. you face away with a frown. he prompts you again, hints of helplessness sneaking in between his words, "c'mon, shortie. don't look away with the shitty reason of us outgrowing our phase of friendship. we were - no, are the closest. you know, right? that you can tell me any-"

"not everything's meant to remain the same always, senpai!" the loud exclamation leaves your mouth. gojo stills and so do you. his eyes fall on the way you wring your hands once before stuffing them into your hoodie's pockets.

it isn't oversized on you, the realisation clicks into place in his mind.

you let out an exhale through your mouth, then pin him down with eyes teeming with what seems like weary distaste.

"can you please get up? you're creating an unnecessary scene right now."

if your words weren't enough, it's the way you utter them that leaves cracks and fissures in him. one more blow, and the boy's sure he'll be blown away into smithereens - an outcome he's trying to avoid [but knows, can't; every piece of armour he dons turns flimsy before you].

"is it 'cause you tended to my injuries then?" he asks. your lips strain into a line. casting him a sideways glance, you shake your head, "i'm many things but a liar ain't in the list, senpai. when i cared for you, it was from my heart. when i no longer wanna associate with you-"

a dark shadow falls over your features. rising from the bench, you shift your gaze skywards and back on him, "it'll rain pretty soon. you should get back inside."

there's something between summer evenings and you and him, gojo muses as he peers up at you.

it was a summer evening when you first came to visit the boy at this school.

it is a summer evening when you're turning your back on him in this same old school.

with the glaring exception of there being the warmth of your form beside him then versus the gnawing chill you're leaving behind now.

"you never completed your sentence," gojo points out, whispering.

[too loud and the sorcerer fears, the last interaction between the two of you will end as a horrid yelling match. besides, you like things with happy endings, don't you? he'll be sure to give you your happy ending as the last gift.]

you send a restrained twitch of lips his way. "i remember being asked not to say every fucking thing out loud, senpai."

a shaky smile is the only thing he finds he can muster in return, at the moment.

"suguru said you're leaving for your home tonight again," the student says, getting up from the ground and moving closer to, yet too far a distance from you. "don't drive with the windows down, okay? the weather's bad, you might catch a cold."

a muscle in your jaw twitches. the valley between your brows furrows.

gojo lets his smile widen a bit. so shallow. so hollow.

"don't worry," he says, "i'm taking this as seriously as you want me to. it's just that..." trailing off, the boy takes a step away. your feet move an inch towards him before you immediately withdraw them. a small mimicry of a laugh leaving him, gojo fixates his gaze on the iridescent colour of your irises.

"i've always seen you as someone way more than a mere childhood friend, y'know? and no matter what you say or do, i can never and will never stop seeing you the same way. i love you that much, short- oh! sorry, i'm not supposed to call you that, am i?."

a beat passes, then another, and another.

your response comes out as a garbled mess of letters and tears. "you're the worst person ever, 'toru. i hate you."

and with that and not another glance wasted anywhere, you whirl on your feet and dash back to the school.

leaving behind the echo of your words ringing in gojo's ears, louder than the thunder of the lightning crashing on a tree a little away.

▸ it's good to be back in the writing game, y'all! 😇😇

▸ series: we're the summer to our winter rain

▸ masterlist

[magpod-confessions]

I think I'm the only person I've spoken to who would maybe...enjoy tma more (??) If it was just an anthology after all?

Like don't get me wrong, I've grown to enjoy Jon, Martin et al over time and through fan content, but I wasn't super paying attention to the meta plot when I listened to tma and thus don't care the most about them?

Like it's fine. But my experience with the podcast was very much just tuning in for a cool horror short story every week and then being vaguely cognizant of the plot bits?

Season 1 remains my favourite and most revisited for this reason. Piecemeal (ep 15) is one of the best stories of all time, it's literally such a classic fairy story but also contemporary and horror and I love it.

.

[edwad]

I think my “mode of thought” question was poorly worded, because I mean “why is political economy not cognizable such that we could critique it (either in the way that Marx frames it, or in general) in the same generalized way we might critique Marxism or humanism, i.e other modes of thought?” I was not making an analogy between political economy and “genre.”

“Marx made it up” is a reasonable answer but basically all modes of thought are, at least initially, post hoc (and self-serving) constructions by other people observing or naming common intellectual themes, underlying values, phrases, symptoms and tacit arguments. “It’s impossible because we’d have to account for everyone” seems, pragmatically speaking, an unreasonably high bar for criticism. (You might say, as you have before, that it’s Marx himself who set the unreasonably high bar - but then I don’t really get why some other more achievable standard for the critique of capital couldn’t be developed; that conclusion of impossibility honestly makes the HET stuff seem like a big waste of time, at least for the purposes of critiquing capitalism/advocating for communism. If the CoPE is impossible, does that make the critique of capitalism impossible by the same standards?)

Writing a general critique of - for example - contractarian or humanist thought seems possible to me, and I don’t think such a project would succeed or fail on the basis of not “accounting for everyone’s beliefs,” even if it makes claims about how a larger system operates based on that critique.

lots of points here are well-taken, but i still feel like this misses the main core of the argument. it isn't that classical political economy is made up while other "modes of thought" aren't, because if that's what all my concern amounted to then it wouldn't really matter. all i could do with that is rate him better or worse as an intellectual historian, and maybe i'd be able to say i'm better at it than him because i have access to more documents and scholarly research or whatever. great for me, i guess, but it doesnt get us anywhere.

the argument i'm making, and you sort of hit on it here, is that *he* is aiming to not just construct demographic groupings of economists (sure whatever), but also to account for these economists out of the dynamics of the system. from here, the actual taxonomy should come *out* of the analysis, so we can assume that this is how he proceeds and that his categories (classical, vulgar, etc) should be fairly adequate for the task and not theoretically premature. this turns out to not be something we can fully grant because his opinions of the economists and how they relate to one another are constantly in flux, but even if we could treat this as a non-problem, he would still have the very hard job ahead of him of actually doing the accounting.

is it an impossible task? you say its a high bar (i agree), and acknowledge where i've said this is marxs own standard not mine (which matters a lot, i think!), so where does that leave us with other standards? well, that's basically not my concern here. if we're assuming the need for other projects, other methods, other standards, then we have accepted my critique. beyond that point, i'd definitely be interested in other attempts at contributions to *a* CoPE rather than *the* CoPE (marxs, apparently no longer salvageable). in fact, this is exactly the sort of thing i've been trying to invite for a few years.

what should be said here, though, is that the difference between projects can't simply be one of degree, where we simply loosen our epistemological claims and decrease the percentage of thoughts we'd need to account for. to me, this just isn't achievable on the terms laid out by marxs CoPE, and this would require a bigger change than just lowering the bar we'd have to clear. this has stakes for his method, and what would it mean for materialism if we weren't able to ground particular dynamics out of the social machinery? why would some be achievable while others aren't? and, pretty significantly (to return to the beginning), how is that any more possible than what marx already did when he got these things *wrong*? we haven't come any closer to offering answers, we've just cut ourselves some slack on how many we're supposed to provide.

this has direct consequences for the critique of capitalism, as ive said elsewhere, because his analysis of capitalism has to inform and be informed by the analysis of political economy. these two levels have to connect for his epistemological argument to work. if they don't, then that isn't just a one-sided problem. but is a critique of capitalism possible otherwise? sure, lots of people have offered them, it's just whether or not they're any good. is a *good* critique of capitalism possible? maybe, but i'm increasingly skeptical of it being rooted in marxs CoPE. is that depressing and frustrating? yeah, absolutely, i fucking hate it.

as for critiquing anything else (humanism, etc), i think it's worth saying how the CoPE isn't merely supposed to be account for political economy alone, as a narrow discipline. he is concerned with PE as the science of capitalist statecraft, but from here's he's working much more broadly to try and tackle liberal social theory as a whole (hegel, bentham, comte, etc). this is why, in the past, i've talked about marx's critique as a critique of modernity. the HET angle is incredibly relevant to estimating marx's success on this front, since this is the direction he goes about approaching the issue, but contractarianism, humanism, etc are all supposed to be bound up with this. if you tried, independently, to offer critiques of these things, i think you'd either be making an incredible mistake if you tried to pursue it in a marxy mode, OR you'd have to find another way in, which might be permissible for the same reasons that i think alternative attempts at the CoPE would be. that doesn't guarantee their success, by any means, but i'm not stopping anyone from being good, creative communists. my whole point is that i think this critique of marx leaves us in the position where this is exactly what's required of us.

[cleoenfaserum]

SCTV (Second City Television) COMEDY TROVE. (1314)

I picked up on the SCTV by a posted blog on my channel. I was going to do a deep dive on the so many implications the short gigs put on this particular show of season 2 episode 2 parodied. For an old fogy like me, many of the situations mentioned are old familiar characterizations and to my generation of people who are still cognizance. Just to let you know, I'm 76. That's right, I'm a long way from home. So ...

1link https://youtu.be/tILfjPPetOs

Well, as for the much younger generation, and as we say in America, it will seem like Greek to you. Take a look... if you don't understand notting, (put on a New York City accent) ...well, it doesn't matter, enjoy ... The show is (was) known for its unique and offbeat humor. SCTV Guide - Episodes - Series 2

2link https://ok.ru/video/5067840621261 SCTV Guide - Episodes - Series 2

SCTV, or Second City Television, was a Canadian sketch comedy show that aired from 1976 to 1984. It was produced by the comedy troupe The Second City, which originated in Chicago and had a Canadian counterpart in Toronto.

SCTV is known for its inventive and often satirical comedy, parodying everything from TV shows and movies to commercials and celebrities. The show was set in a fictional television station, with the sketches framed as different programs on the SCTV network. This format allowed for a wide variety of comedic styles and themes, ranging from absurd and slapstick to sharp social commentary.

Some of the most notable SCTV cast members include John Candy, Eugene Levy, Catherine O'Hara, Rick Moranis, and Harold Ramis, among others. These comedians would go on to have successful careers in film and television.

The show is celebrated for its unique and offbeat humor, and it has left a lasting impact on the world of comedy. If you're interested in classic sketch comedy, SCTV is definitely worth checking out!

For the younger generation who may not be familiar with Bob Hope

Bob Hope 1943 TIME cover art by Ernest Hamlin Baker

Leslie Townes "Bob" Hope (May 29, 1903 – July 27, 2003) was a British-born American comedian,  actor,  entertainer and producer with a career that spanned nearly 80 years and achievements in vaudeville, network radio, television, and USO Tours. He appeared in more than 70 short and feature films, starring in 54. He hosted the Academy Awards show 19 times, more than any other host. He also appeared in many stage productions and television roles and wrote 14 books. He specialized in one-liners and rapid-fire delivery of jokes that were often self-deprecating. (Bob Hope - Wikipedia)

Bob Hope filmography - Wikipedia

Going Spanish (1934) is an American short comedy film featuring the film debut of Bob Hope and directed by Al Christie. The short comedy co-stars Leah Ray and Jules Epailly. Released by Educational Pictures, the film premiered on March 2, 1934. It was re-cut and released as Bob's Busy Day by Comedy House in 1942 Going Spanish - Wikipedia

3link https://youtu.be/wGidmRqgw9Y

The Big Broadcast of 1938 is a Paramount Picturesmusical comedy film starring W. C. Fields and featuring Bob Hope. Directed by Mitchell Leisen, the film is the last in a series of Big Broadcast movies that were variety showanthologies. This film featured the debut of Hope's signature song, "Thanks for the Memory" by Ralph Rainger. The Big Broadcast of 1938 - Wikipedia

4ink https://youtu.be/yWynvckaosk

The Adventures of Bob Hope - Wikipedia

5link https://youtu.be/ZP0KD82t8WA

[asexual-juliet]

just wanted to let u know that its pretty weird to romanticize internment camps and describing that as their “meet cute” is even weirder especially cause ur white

i’m really sorry if that wording came off the wrong way; i am absolutely not trying to romanticize the incarceration. with my reference to a “meet-cute moment” between Kimi and Frank i was not talking about the camp experience itself as a “meet-cute” but imagining a hypothetical interaction they may have had when they met (like the classic “helping them pick up their dropped books after we walk into each other” moment), but i see where that could have been unclear.

i think it’s really important to remember that just because America locked Japanese American people away during the war, that doesn’t mean their lives stopped — they met new people, they fell in love, they passed all kinds of everyday milestones, and they grew as people over the three-or-so years they were incarcerated. the incarceration was a horrific breach of human rights and a deeply traumatizing experience for the people who lived it, but there were stories of joy in its history as well — an anecdote that comes to mind is referenced in the obituary of Grace Umezawa Nixon, which mentions that she once “recalled dancing the jitterbug at Santa Anita, with Dorothy and some ‘cute boys from Pasadena.’” Another example — at Heart Mountain in Wyoming, George Igawa led a swing band made up of musicians of all different skill levels that became so popular that they were asked to play proms and war bond rallies outside of the camp.

i’m incredibly sorry to anyone i may have hurt with that wording and i will absolutely be more cognizant of my language in the future.

[ilikereadingactually]

But Not Too Bold

But Not Too Bold by Hache Pueyo

holy shit this book was such a fun surprise to me! it resonated in ways i wasn't expecting, and took a number of intriguing turns in a pretty short span.

i really adored the atmosphere here: the huge, decadent house and its rules and quirks, the gothic sense of dread and dream logic, the ancient and monstrous mistress Anatema. Pueyo combines a classic folktale feel (specifically referencing Mister Fox, a variant of Bluebeard) and a mansion full of maids and cooks and a majordomo with the unique magic surrounding Anatema—endless fields of poppies, tarantulas that constantly appear, miniature memories that Anatema weaves and keeps locked away in drawers as a record of everyone she has eaten. the house is its own world that operates within and around these oddities, and to the staff none of it seems that strange at all.

Anatema herself is capricious—one assumes her home is called Capricious House for a reason—and objectively should be frightening. she's huge and spider-like in her anatomy, even though she is able to fold herself down into a more humanlike shape when she chooses, and she's deadly in her moods, constantly seeking a bride but growing angry and eating each human woman she courts. in some ways Anatema and the house and its staff remind me of Spirited Away, a self-contained and structured system where things might go very magically awry if offense is caused at the wrong moment.

but we get to see Anatema through the eyes of Dália, the new Keeper of the Keys, who has been raised in the house and so has no special fear of its mistress. through Dália's calm and curious perspective, the book becomes an almost-cozy mystery, trying to unravel a theft as Dália and Anatema get to know each other and see each other in ways they haven't been seen before. and there's a particular way in which Dália thinks of herself, or rather doesn't think of herself, with a certain detachment that felt very real to me. she doesn't know if she's pretty, she doesn't want anything grand beyond the treat of a favorite food, she isn't cognizant of any affections or attractions within herself until outside input forces her to consider these things more closely. when she does finally come to understand what she really wants, it's such a beautiful slow bloom of comprehension, so lovely and queer and familiar!

now i get why i've been seeing this book on lists everywhere, what an absolute treasure!

the deets

how i read it: an egalley from NetGalley, as per my usual!

try this if you: dig a gothic mood, love it when monsters have feelings, enjoy an unflappable pov character, or are into spider-bodied women!

some lines i really liked: i am so in love with Dália fr

She knew what she looked like. She knew, but she did not see. The shape of her face meant nothing to her. She had no opinions regarding the curve of her hip or the width of her waist. Whenever she looked in a mirror, she only saw Dália. Not adjectives, nothing. Only Dália. Wasn't that how everybody else felt?

---

"I can't speak for your future bride, but please don't hide when you request my presence. I have already seen you," added Dália, staring into her dark blue eyes. "I feel no horror, nor fear, no disgust. Eat whenever you want to eat. Preferably not me or the other employees, if that's not asking too much. But move the way you move, look the way you look. There is nothing wrong with that."

pub date: February 11, 2025! it's out there, go read it!!