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Shout out to people with auditory processing disorder!!!

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And they’re not even five feet apart!

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fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

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dislike and discomfort are normal and healthy parts of the human experience actually

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I sensory regulated so hard that I fucked up my electrolyte balance ahah beat that

No but seriously, who was gonna tell me that drinking Too Much Water (cause that’s a thing apparently) causes like the holy mother of month long migraines and nausea cause like. I would have appreciated knowing that beforehand you guys

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Jason's day off

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I had a Thought™ this morning and I wanna see if y'all vibe or nah

SO I as many of you know, or don't lmao, I use notion as my main way to organize my wips. I'm wanting to expand on my already made templates for writing exercises, more plot oriented organization, and just diving deeper into my wips via notion (which let's be real it's already pretty intense in those bitches)

That being said, would anyone be interested if I started sharing those templates?

A few examples of what I'm talking about

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i just can't believe that oda fucking create sanji, a stereotypical ladies man who simps to an embarrassing degree for women while having his hackles comically raised around everyone he perceives as a man - and most notably butting heads with the more obvious ~manly man~ of the crew. haha, classic anime running gag, the kind that gets obnoxious at times but still makes you laugh.

AND THEN, like a billion chapters later, motherfucker steeples his fingers and goes "soooooooo... what makes a person Like That?"

and the answer is that he grew up in fucking Toxic Masculinity, The Kingdom. the answer is that he was always Different, in a way other guys instinctively perceived as weak, and that made him the target of visceral scorn and violence. the answer is that he was sensitive, sweet, caring, nurturing - feminine-coded traits which are only valued by patriarchy insofar that they're performed by women in service of men. the answer is that in a kingdom comprised almost entirely by violent men, the only ones who were ever kind to him, the only safety he ever had, were a girl and a woman.

so cooking is for women and servants, it makes you less of a man. only women will ever really value you for your passions and dreams. women are also actively hurt by the way the world works, they are unsafe unless they comply with men's violence, and you have to protect them.

(men will always know what you are, and they will hurt you if you let them.)

and even after he leaves... at baratie he is cherished and respected, but even that is an extremely masculine environment. we don't talk about our feelings, we don't let our guard down, the only love is tough love. when he tries to express his artistry and express himself through his cooking, rather than just filling orders and making money, he gets mocked.

so here is a man who will not raise a hand to a woman, because he rejects the masculinity he was raised with and refuses to become yet another man subjecting women to violence. he is desperate for women's attention and affection because it's SAFE, it's the only kind he can trust. other men are potential threats and must be treated as such. he must at all times be snarky, tough, Not Feminine, because to be perceived otherwise is to be powerless, to be hurt.

like y'all. the queer coding of it all? the overtly feminist themes? the active rejection of toxic masculinity and the way it's shown to be directly tied to imperialism? what the fuck.

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I found that I’m writing the best pieces when I’m not hiding myself.

My writing’s better when I pour every last ounce of my tormented soul into it.

Stars aren’t made from a soft caress but from brute force, heat, and a clashing of elements.

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Born to be a book character, forced to be a writer

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Trying to hold drink between thighs but thighs too big and shove drink out of way. Hot girl problems.

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Humans are Space Orcs Idea

Okay so hiii, i had an idea so i kinda ran with it.

This was inspired by me eating an orange and thinking 'man, i wonder if aliens would find it weird watching me pull off all the strings like this' and it kinda ran from there. this might have a few parts later on if i get inspired, but mostly whatever is made here will be odd human behaviors that i think would be funny/interesting from an aliens perspective.

Writing under the cut!

Day 1 in alien captivity

I'll be honest, I've been here much longer than a day—perhaps four or more by now. This is the first time I've been given something resembling paper and writing tools, so to make it easier to remember, this will be labelled day one.

I couldn't tell you why I'm here or how I got to where I am. Most of it's a blur by now and even if it wasn't, I'd rather forget anyway. I won't bore you with that.

The aliens I'm with now are tall creatures largely covered in fur except for the horns protruding from their heads. Of the few I've seen its safe to assume that these horns come in many different variations—one having a pair similar to a goat and another having ones reminiscent of the classic devil horns. (There are two portrait drawings beside this passage, one of a fluffy creature with goat horns and another a slick-furred creature with devil horns. They both have smiley faces.)

Whatever these aliens are, they seem very interested in what I am. Studying what I am, that is. They treat me like an animal, trying to replicate a natural environment within a small cell and giving me food and objects that I assume are for entertainment purposes. I can see them in a window at the top of the cell, watching and writing and talking amongst themselves as I go about my day. Researchers, I assume. Scientists.

I don't know what their plans are and they seem largely uninterested in hurting me or even coming close. For now, I'll just continue what I've been trying to do from the start—make them realize I'm not an animal but a fully cognizant person who would really like to go home soon.

Day 2 in alien captivity

They keep giving me these fruits that I've taken to calling oranges due to their resemblance to the fruit. It has a peel, purple and sectioned similar to a pumpkin, that's thick but easy to pierce. It comes off in the previously mentioned sections like a banana and leaves strings behind like an orange.

This is where the name comes from—the gross and annoying strings all over the flesh of the fruit. It takes half an hour to get them off due to the size of the thing, but eating it with them on isn't an option. Taste aside, they make me nauseous. Best to avoid that.

The aliens seem amused at me painstakingly removing all the strings, like they think it's a silly behavior of an animal rather than a necessary evil. I can see them writing something down and chattering between themselves every time I do it where they can see. A voice inside me wonders if they find my methods odd—the piercing and removal of the outer peel, the long process of de-stringing the flesh, then pulling apart the sections to eat them one by one. The voice wonders if they see intelligence in those actions. If using my fingers skillfully to remove the inedible materials says I'm more than just the animal they think I am.

I've learned to ignore that voice.

The flesh of the fruit is orange, ironically, but more of a burning red shade than the brighter color of its namesake. It tastes oddly like an apple, sweet and acidic, with the texture of a grape. I can't decide if I hate it. I can't decide if I should. For now, it's food and as long as they're willing to feed me like this for free, I'm happy to eat.

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It’s always ‘oh you’re so pretty’ or ‘oh you’re so hot’ until I’ve ruined one of your favorite containers bc I had hard caramel but I wanted melted caramel to dip into so I tried to microwave it but it burned through the plastic container.

Everyone has such high expectations these days, I swear.

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MWA HA HA! You fools, you’ve fallen into my clever trap!!

Little did you know this was my devious lil villain plan at getting people to tell me about their favorite freckles!!

Now, watch helplessly as I collect them all and hang them from my walls like beautiful taxidermy bugs!!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Wait hold on. You’re telling me that.. y’all don’t have fav freckles???

Context: I was talking to my mom and I pointed to my right wrist where I have a very prominent freckle (big, dark, and literally the only one there) and said “this is my favorite freckle. It lets me know this is my right hand so I don’t have to remember which way an L faces.” I then asked what her favorite freckle is.

And she didn’t get it. She was so confused. She told me she’d never thought of it. That it never crossed her mind??????

Do y’all not have favorite freckles??? Do y’all not look at certain freckles and think “wow, that’s really good placement I love you very much”???? Like I have multiple that I adore and find ways to show off but y’all don’t have even one??

There’s no way. Someone’s lying to me.

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This, but I love to imagine aliens being confronted with the horror story of Periods. There’s smth so funny about these poor oblivious souls being told female humans Bleed Out for days to weeks on end and it’s just a natural process we have to live with.

Female Human: For the last time, I’m fine! Let me do my work!

Alien: But I smell blood! How can you not be injured when you reek of a thousand dead Cottilmins?

Female Human: Oh. OH! Oh, holy shit, you can smell that? I’m so sorry, dude. I’m not bleeding out, big guy, I’m just on my period right now.

Alien: What does the human punctuation mark for the ending of a regular, non-excited or non-questioning sentence have anything to do with you smelling like a brakkin walking morgue?????

Female Human: God, this is not gonna be a fun conversation for either of us, big guy. Let’s… let’s go sit down. I’ll get you an info packet or smth but you should be sitting for this, I think. I need a quick reprieve from these awful cramps, anyway.

Alien: Cramps? Is that a disease? You are suffering a chronic disease and working like it’s nothing?! I knew it, you are dying!! Come, come, you must rest!

I’ve fallen down the Humans Are Space Orcs rabbit hole and I just can’t get over the idea of aliens freaking out over a fever

Alien: what do you mean your body is raising its temperature to a lethal degree to kill the virus attacking you? and it doesn’t kill you too?

Human: well no, we can sustain higher temperatures than bacteria, it’s more of an inconvenience to us you know? well unless, um

Alien: Unless what??

Human: well sometimes our body continues to keep raising the temperature for too long and it makes our vital organs fail… if you think about it it’s still killing the virus by the end so it is efficient!

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it's them it's him

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I have one there too!! Freckle buddies :D!!!!

Wait hold on. You’re telling me that.. y’all don’t have fav freckles???

Context: I was talking to my mom and I pointed to my right wrist where I have a very prominent freckle (big, dark, and literally the only one there) and said “this is my favorite freckle. It lets me know this is my right hand so I don’t have to remember which way an L faces.” I then asked what her favorite freckle is.

And she didn’t get it. She was so confused. She told me she’d never thought of it. That it never crossed her mind??????

Do y’all not have favorite freckles??? Do y’all not look at certain freckles and think “wow, that’s really good placement I love you very much”???? Like I have multiple that I adore and find ways to show off but y’all don’t have even one??

There’s no way. Someone’s lying to me.