#clean up your depression
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
ok imagine nightmare sans. now imagine those minecraft villager trading halls where all the villagers are stuck in the little cell blocks to get ideal trades. now that but replace the villagers with the murder time trio and ideal trades with negativity. he's maxxing out the negativity output for every square foot i guess,,,,,,,
there's absolutely NO space for movement it's practically a little closet. only thing is like basic necessities like food and water distributed by a killer (because he wouldn't get attatched to any of them when there's so many,,,, perhaps a different cell warden for a killer only section to avoid a killer meeting another killer and then having to deal with the mindboggle they'd face and then UGH!!!) these little negativity farms cost so little effort to make!!! all nightmare has to do is keep as many (living) sanses (IN FACT NOT EVEN THE TRIO!! but also the trio since they're easy to break down) in as little space as possible and he's practically got like. + 100k negativity every hour with just 6 of these farms. how efficient!
what do you mean it violates the genevarsal convention. DREAM STOP CONDUCTING PRISON BREAKS
(a little birdie told me u wanted 2 be tagged,,, @qin-qin16)
#nightmare's ideal vacation would be at one of these negativity farms#aaaah the screams of the angered and the sobs of the devastated..... killer go fetch me another piña colada#this line of thought is around the same as my nightmare but he's an immature brat and the trio are his replaceable toys#i laugh behind my screen at the ridiculousness of those but i know that someone else behind their screen is aghast#this is a bit concerning but listen LISTEN ok listen...... are you listening. its not that bad people have had worse thoughts#oh i can just IMAGINE all the suffering that happens here it's demented. i love my trio but man#i should really stop putting them into terrible dehumanizing situations. this is like the 14th time now.........#LISTEN ITS EITHER THIS OR THE 34TH RANT ABOUT THE TRIO HATING AND MAULING EACH OTHER. WHICH ONE WOULD YOU RATHER TRIGLYCERNATION#now add white torture into this- TRIGLYCERCULE THATS ENOIUUUUUGHHHHHH#now i know DAMN well there's like a lottery everyday and it's to see who'll get out#but then it just ends up being whoever becomes nightmare's personal tormentee until they die#i meaaan theres an INFINITE amount of aus out there. infinite copies of the trio. he can afford to lose 1 or 2. maybe 3. 4. ok 5#the cells do not get cleaned up. they are caked in the dust of all the others who have died in there#and when a dust copy is ripped from his au after killing papyrus for the first time he is only left confused and devastated#whos dust is here? the tally marks on the walls?? the dried vomit in the corner?? the weird guy monitoring him 24/7?? WHAT IS GOING ON#and then it starts to sink in and oh god if this wasn't the worst possible time for him to be introduced to the multiverse. AND TERRIBLY TO#and then he gets angry. he just decided to start killing his underground and now he did ALL THAT FOR NOTHING??? HE CAN'T HELP HIS AU IN HER#and then depression. he doesn't know how long he'll be stuck here. dust denies food and water he only silently cries and zones out#yada yada bargaining and then acceptance by which then if he's completely numb and providing no emotions killer disposes of him#it's not only dehumanizing for the prisoners but also absolutely terrible for the warden killer too#all these faces eventually blend into one and not even the most anguished of cries about other versions of papyrus do anything#SOMEONE STOP THIS MADNESS BRUH DREAM!!! DREAM PLEASE!!!!! DREAM STOP YOUR BROTHER BRO#obligatory reminder that i do not support any of this i just thought of it and it was funny but also crazy so i had to make this. REMINDER!#tricule rant#killer sans#horror sans#dust sans#murder time trio#nightmare sans#bad sanses
24 notes
·
View notes
Note
Yet you still do not deny my words. But oh well, I'll leave you be! Have fun with that arm of yours!
-◇
…
Does she still even like me…?
*Tisha is sobbing now. She feels like shit for not talking with her girlfriend. She wants to die so badly. She just wants it all to stop.*
#dandy’s world#dandys world#dandys world rp#dandys world tisha#tisha#clean answers#🧹WHEN I CATCH YOU ANON THEY’LL NEVER FIND YOUR BODY#tw: sucidal thoughts#🧹maybe?#🧹HER MENTAL HEALTH IS GETTING WORSE#🧹NAW FUCK THAT SHE’S STRAIGHT UP DEPRESSED NOW
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
That random 'you are GOING to deep-clean today' bug that strikes once in a blue moon struck me today. Feeling GREAT.
#Hayley Speaks#Once again; it's true what they say about how cleaning up your living space is a good way to quell your depression#I'm feeling SO good
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
having a gigantic storage room as your bedroom is so crazy because i don't imagine stelle being organized at all and you can only ever truly spot it spic and span after every other two weeks when they decide not to slack on doing anything
#introspec. / labyrinth of your mind.#they dumpster dive i dont think they would be clean at all#probs spends most of their time bedrotting or just zoning out in the gaming area but never actively cleaning#has to actively dissuade pompom from entering their room because how do u tell the conductor that you were just wasting away in ur bed#instead of cleaning up ur surroundings#depression room core
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i really thought i was getting better. i see now that that was stupid of me
#.pdf#rd#sorry feel free to ignore the following whining about my health#few days back i started feeling like i had more energy than i had in weeks#so i was like oh good i can do stuff again and cleaned all my fishtanks (spent a couple hours hauling buckets of water back and forth)#and then followed that up with staying up too late AND a half day of being out and about because i “felt up for it”#unfortunately my suspected Feel Bad After Doing Stuff Disease made me feel bad. after doing stuff. and now i feel like an idiot#why did i think that i would suddenly be able to handle my previous levels of exertion again? i do not know.#i guess its just hard to like really internalize that this might be my life now and that i cant do too much of anything even if i want to#got used to being told that im just depressed or something. made me start to doubt if im actually sick. made me think i would be fine#nope. clearly still something wrong with me. sucks to be me i guess#i feel so weak and sick and cold. like the kind of deep untouchable cold you feel when your blood temp drops from being given iv fluids...#hate it. one of my least favorite symptoms for sure for sure
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
>be me
>looking for MegOP fics on AO3
>see fic tagged IDW1
>fic has Megatron/Optimus as the main characters
>there's only a couple other ships so I know they're going to be at least one of the main ships and not a background ship
>I click
>see the author's note
>"I tagged IDW but it's mostly continuity soup" etc etc "and archivist Orion Pax"
#squiggposting#this is why i gave up looking for idw megop fic years ago#and now i only read my friends' fic OR fic they recommend or i just write/read my own stuff#idk if my presence in the fandom has swayed more people to actual idw OP content. i havent checked lately#honestly more sad than ppl refusing to write coptimus is how they don't even write their OPs like idw op's personality#if you gave me like. an angry jock librarian with the loyalty of a puppy and impulsive anger issues then i would be fine#but everyone just does dockworker/librarian/whatever OP who's mainly just a Good Guy#which is like. inoffensive enough i guess#but if your problem with idw op is that he's a cop. then just make him not a cop and keep his personality#but no one does that. big thinks as to why#bc ppl either don't know what idw op's personality is or they don't like that his depression comes out as being distant or angry#squeaky clean optimus whose depression is just him being sad and forlorn ONLY. we cannot have him be flawed#or have his flaws/inner turmoil manifest in destructive ways/ways that make bad things happen
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
sometimes it can help to take tasks and break them down into smaller tasks and just do one little thing at a time if you’re someone who gets overwhelmed easily like I do. I tend to be like ahh I have to do this and this and this but breaking things down into little manageable small tasks that end up still leading to the completion of what I need to do helps me a lot. There are ways to overcome your anxiety and that overwhelmed feeling and this is just one of them. Don’t give up or stop trying 🩵🪽 You’ve got this
#plus a lot of time doing things we need to do can help with depression even if we don’t want to do them#sometimes (almost always) you feel better after doing these ‘dreaded’ tasks#like taking care of yourself or cleaning up your space or whatever it is that you need to do for work or school etc
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
That moment when you have a dream about somebody and it feels so real that your brain legitimately has to take a moment to grieve its loss when you wake up and realize it isn't
#depression#technically it wasn't you in the dream#...it was jacob elordi from Euphoria (don't ask me why; i do not know)#(and even weirder; in the dream he was basically trying to circumspectly ask me and/or the friend(gf?) i was with to eat his 🍑 lmao)#(he tried to bribe/entice us by picking pears for us out of this massive tree - showing off lmao)#(mine was shaped like an upside down heart 🥲)#(so i told him like 'i don't even know how to do that. i have no experience. but like. maybe??)#('maybe? if im like 💯 sure you cleaned between the cheeks? idk it seems awfully intimate to ask of someone youre not like dating')#and then he came closer to me and let me hug him for a sec. just for a second. my arm around him & ear to his chest#and it felt so real!!!#until i woke up juuust enough to realize: jacob elordi was not real.#BUT that my brain had used the very real sense memory of hugging you to produce that dream sensation#and it made me so homesick#because your left ribs still feel like home to me#even five months later#what the fuck is wrong with me
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
hey siri how do I stop feeling gutwrenchingly anxious in the guilt way for using the treatment methods available to me to not be in constant misery
#starlight personal#it’s very bizarre to have my life going objectively well - work is good! personal life is good! family is good!#and still be very mentally ill and feel like I’m faking it even though I know damn well I ain’t scream-sobbing every couple of days alone in#my apartment for attention because What Attention??? my cat????? Bug is never moved by my tears she cares only for string and wires#like I know that cannabis has been immensely helpful to getting me to fucking sleep on a regular schedule and that’s integral to -#my functioning and I know that having emergency klonopin in the event of a total breakout is helpful#and I KNOW that my PMDD and depression and anxiety are very treatment resistant and ketamine is the only thing that’s provided any -#meaningful relief and logically I know I’m not abusing any of these#I’m getting a promotion at work I still go out to see friends regularly I have hobbies I have a girlfriend (??? Wild right)#like clearly these things are working because i’m better now than i was for years leading up to now#SO LIKE. DON’T STOP USING THE THINGS THAT HELP. LOGICALLY THIS MEANS THESE ARE GOOD FOR ME#I always roll my eyes when ppl go off their meds b/c they’re feeling better like babes that’s what the meds are meant to do#if you stop taking them you stop feeling better - but it’s REALLY HARD to get past the cultural conditioning#the feeling that ‘but I can white knuckle my way through this I can force myself to live without’ like WHY BITCH#WE DON’T HAVE TO LIVE WITHOUT#AND ALSO. WE’RE STILL GENERALLY MISERABLE BRO. EVEN WITH OUR LIFE IN A BETTER PLACE!!!#DO YOU NOT THINK THIS MEANS THAT WE SHOULD USE WHAT WE KNOW WORKS TO BE LESS MISERABLE#basically it’s really hard to not feel like a loser when the only things that help are ‘fun’ drugs like weed and psychedelics#I feel like I’m being a hedonistic reprobate which 1) is actually kinda cool now that I wrote it out#2) @ myself were not a good enough liar-faker that every medical professional we see wouldn’t pick up on that if that was our motivation#time to remind myself that it’s arrogant to think I could trick many trained professionals without actively trying tbh#that generally helps me get out of my self-pitying ‘ohhhhh I’m awful and lazy and bad and abusing substances’ spiral#to be very mentally ill on main it is weirdly reassuring to be like ‘just as my fanon interpretation of obi wan kinda hates himself but is -#practical enough to take care of himself even when it makes him cringe and want to scratch his face off; I too am aware that self-care is -#radical and punk and In Fact Necessary to beat back the dark and live in the light with hope so yes even though I doubt and -#feel squiggly and guilty about it I’m not going to NOT prioritize my health and well-being b/c self-hatred and self-denial benefits no one’#thank you inner obi wan i love projecting my issues onto you mwah mwah mwah smooches for my favorite boy!!!!!#and smooches for me I’m going to be proud of myself gosh darn it even if I have to fake it at first#see I wouldn’t be able to be nice to myself like this if I hadn’t been doing ketamine treatment for a year IT WORKS BRO KEEP IT UP#SCHEDULE THE DAMN APPOINTMENT AND CLEAN YOUR BONG
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
ive been in this place for so long that i get special treatment from basically everyone😗✌🏼
#on the one hand its cool bc i get a free pass for some stuff#on the other. it reminds me of how long ive been here and it depresses me😭#rn the special privilege is being able to send pdfs i need printed instead of having to use a pen drive#when i asked the woman literally told me ' bc youre you yes you can send it'#like hiiiiii thank u so much#im also on speaking terms w all the security guards most of the cooks and some of the cleaning ladies like😭😭😭😭😭#oh i also got a (1€) discount another day when i went to buy a lunch ticket#bc they knew me so they like. debated if they should give me the 'insider' price or the outsider price#bc the ticket wasnt for me it was for a friend but i had to pick it up. in the end i got the insider price bc i went to get the ticket#instead of my friend. anyways😭 how do u want me to leave when im treated like this here..... its gonna be so hard for me when i leave LMAO#(which will hopefully be next yr)#z xarre
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
one last itty bitty one. speed running rui. i hope you feel better aura!!!!!!!!!!
thank you marlo this really does make me feel better :)
#i think i’m like. overloaded burnt out and mildly depressed#all rolled up into one really sucky past few days#it’s why i haven’t really been active. anywhere#but i want to break out of the loop#yknow that thing that’s like “if naruto would be proud of you for brushing your teeth than “ something i forgot the rest#that’s rui for me rn#i think i can clean my room tomorrow for rui#i will clean my room tomorrow for rui.
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Today's suggestion task:
Engage in the highs and lows of housekeeping. You can't perform unethical experiments in a dirty lab unless you want to risk the dripping goo in the corner catch sentience and attempt to murder you for not having swept the floor in three months
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#so for the last like. as long as i can remember. ive had a shit sleep schedule#mostly like sleep all day and stay up all night kinda shit#but i got sick/burnt out recently and slept for almost two days straight#and somehow it reset my sleep schedule to something normal#like i went to bed at 10pm and woke up at 5am for the last few days#and i havent had to nap#and the not needing to nap is really fucking with me#like im used to waking up. feeding my dog. and then napping until i go to work#i should be napping rn. but im not tired#i dont have to get ready for work for another four hours and ive already been awake for three hours#i went to the coffee shop and to walgreens. im in real clothes instead of pajamas. i did a load of laundry#im laying in bed (its so hot i might be dying) and i just. dont know what to do with my time#im probably gonna do some cleaning and packing because im moving in two months#idk im just feeling some strange type of way because for the last few days ive been. alive#instead of sleeping my life away#its so strange. i got sick. slept for a few days. and now my biggest problem is just fixed? and i can have a life now?#its 70 degrees today and the world is my oyster. what should i do?#i have a list of chores im gonna do. i might walk to the coinstar machine so ill have money#yeah i want to do that cuz im in the negatives in my bank account but i want to get a cool drink before work today#my dad texted me this morning 'noticed your bank account is overdrawn for the second time this week. whats going on kid?'#which is such a sad text to get because i know im broke. thanks dad. lets pls ignore my financial hardships#if you want to make my dad less sad hmu for my venmo /hj#anyways ill probs do that today. get some cash so i can get a frozen lemonade from wawa or something#yknow that post thats like 'seasonal depression seems fake until its 50 degrees in march and it feels like you took a party drug'#i think thats partially whats happening here. its 70 degrees and sunny and my systems dont know what to do with that#i hope youre all having a great day that you dont sleep through. i love you!!
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
why can't a boy take a break from the horrors ? oh, must i always suffer this way ? is there no end to this madness ?
#<- had to deep clean its bedroom and decided to take a 20 minutes power nap that became a 3 hours existential crisis depression time#everything is laying around on the floor and for the life of me i cannot get up from bed to clean it up#i found a bunch of boxes filled with stuff from when i was suicidal in highschool and it hurts too much to look at it#but i cannot bring myself to throw them away bcs these are the only things i have that certify that i was Alive at that time#ive no photos of me no nothing apart from these notebooks filled with gore drawings and fanfiction about characters killing themselves lol#how do i make peace with who i used to be when that person brings me such sadness....#im so sorry ivan i should have treated myself better im doing my best nowadays !!!#u get to turn 18 ! and 20 ! and 25 ! and soon we're turning 26 and youre so much happier and content in life#its not all good u still are depressed and cant talk to people but ure much better than u used to be#i think of teenager me and how he thought i wouldnt make it this far... and when i think about my future and how i wont be able to make it.#i think... actually i was wrong once and i figured things out#i think i can do it again....#and i will !!!! by all gods that i dont believe in i will !!#vanya strawberry flavored
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
Honeybee: Name something positive you have done for yourself or someone else in the last two weeks.
I’ve been really trying to focus on bettering myself lately.
#starting to clean/organize my room so I can actually sleep and live in there#miss art so much so I’m desperately trying to get a desk area set up#trying to eat better#lol#that one is damn hard when you don’t have your own kitchen my dude#but I’m trying?#I JOGGED yesterday???????#fucking mindblowing I know#don’t remember the last time I jogged#I went on a long walk with Maya puppy and we jogged a few times#you guys should have seen her smile 😭#she also met this tiny senior dog named Murphy and she was SO excited and happy afterwards#it was the cutest thing I’ve seen in ages 🥹#I wish I could say something I did for someone else#and I’ve done small things here and there sure#but when I’m drowning and trying to survive it’s so hard to help other people#like I’m trying to be myself and check in on people and make sure they’re doing good and being there to listen to them vent#but I can barely handle my day#like my sister vented to me the other day (and of course I was actually in a good mood at the start of the call)#and then by the end I was stuck in my depression like I spiraled BAD#so idk I’m trying super hard to focus on myself and get me back to my happy rosie self#so I can help other people#thanks for the ask 🫶#ask#ask me shit
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
2235.
in the midst of all these summer homes in winter crowded together kissing close one empty lot and then another like missing stairs like this should feel like some kind of a relief and it just doesn't and I can't tell you why
#365#poetry#also i didn't take a picture because it felt weird#but there's a house that's presumably being redone#got the sign up advertising who's doing it#and the trim of the porch has these hand-painted flowers#and this is original right this is chipped and faded and it's the old house#that's about to go away forever#and it's so fucking depressing#it's the mcminimalism thing that gets me#not quite mcmansions because those aren't as trendy now so it's these clean white and gray rectangles#still oversized crowding the lot super close to one another but 'minimalist' in that trendy way#and that's what's going to happen that's what we get we lose that painted trim#and we'll lose those vacant lots#and it'll all be mcminimalist#that's my tag rant enjoy your evening
2 notes
·
View notes