#until i woke up juuust enough to realize: jacob elordi was not real.
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That moment when you have a dream about somebody and it feels so real that your brain legitimately has to take a moment to grieve its loss when you wake up and realize it isn't
#depression#technically it wasn't you in the dream#...it was jacob elordi from Euphoria (don't ask me why; i do not know)#(and even weirder; in the dream he was basically trying to circumspectly ask me and/or the friend(gf?) i was with to eat his 🍑 lmao)#(he tried to bribe/entice us by picking pears for us out of this massive tree - showing off lmao)#(mine was shaped like an upside down heart 🥲)#(so i told him like 'i don't even know how to do that. i have no experience. but like. maybe??)#('maybe? if im like 💯 sure you cleaned between the cheeks? idk it seems awfully intimate to ask of someone youre not like dating')#and then he came closer to me and let me hug him for a sec. just for a second. my arm around him & ear to his chest#and it felt so real!!!#until i woke up juuust enough to realize: jacob elordi was not real.#BUT that my brain had used the very real sense memory of hugging you to produce that dream sensation#and it made me so homesick#because your left ribs still feel like home to me#even five months later#what the fuck is wrong with me
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