#christopher diaz character study 911

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck & Eddie: Eddie and Buck are co-parenting Christopher-Parallels

Eddie is Christopher’s biological father and Buck is his legal guardian/second dad.  Eddie and Buck have been co-parenting him for almost 5 years and Buck loves Christopher the same way Eddie does (related post).  They care for him, protect him, spend time with him, have important conversations with him and they’re always there for him whenever he needs them. Christopher knows that if he can’t talk to Eddie about something, he can always go talk to Buck (related post).  In 3x10 “Christmas Spirit”, Christopher asked Buck if he could spend Christmas with him since Eddie had to work (they both had to work).  Also he took Eddie’s cell phone, ordered an Uber after he got upset with Eddie in 4x8 “Breaking Point” and went to Buck’s loft so that he could talk to him and explain the way he felt about Eddie dating again and people leaving him.  That’s when Buck promised Christopher that he wasn’t going anywhere.  Buck, Eddie and Christopher are a family (related post) and once Buck realizes that Eddie and Christopher have been and are continuing to wait for him, then Buck will finally understand that his ‘secret to happiness’ is not a secret at all because they’ve been right in front of him the entire time.  They’re The Buckley-Diaz Family your honor!

GIF 2x4 “Stuck”

GIF 4x14 “Survivors”

GIF 3x2 “sink or Swim”

GIF 3x4 “Triggers”

GIF 3x18 “What’s Next?”

GIF 3x18 “What’s Next?”

GIF 3x12 “Fools”

GIF 4x8 “Breaking Point”

GIF 5x11 “Outside Looking In”

GIF 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia”

GIF 2x4 “Stuck”

GIF 2x10 “Merry X-Mas”

GIF 3x1 “Kids Today”

GIF 3x9 “Fallout”

GIF 3x10 “Christmas Spirit”

GIF 4x3 “Future Tense”

GIF 5x14 “Dumb Luck”

GIF 6x1 “Let the Games Begin”

[fionaswhvre]

Buck always thought that not all parents are meant to love you unconditionally and that there must be something wrong with him because he never got that kind of love from his parents.

Until he met Christopher Diaz and he realized how easy unconditional love comes is supposed to come to you when you have a kid. And that there is no way it will ever happen that Chris will be out there somewhere and Buck wouldn't care about where he is or what he's doing.

Buck didn't know parents are supposed to love you unconditionally until he met Bobby Nash, who taught him to cook, to dress, to become a man, a person of his own. Who forgave Buck even when Buck unleashed his worst on him (re: the lawsuit). Who never looks at him with that hint of disappointment or with the suggestion that Buck has failed him.

Buck never grew up with the parental love he deserved until he met Bobby who taught him the real definition of being a parent and until he met Chris, who, Buck swore, will never feel unloved as long as him and Eddie are alive.

[yellingatthescreen]

Eddie’s gotta be thinking here about what he needed at thirteen, and what he couldn’t have talked to his dad about. What do we think it was?

Probably how he wished his dad was home more, and how overwhelmed he was being named “the man of the house.” How he had no idea how to do that, because his dad was rarely around to be an example, and how he felt crushed by the responsibility of figuring it out and executing it all on his own.

What else would he be struggling with at thirteen? That’s around the age he might be starting to get crushes or start dating. But I think they definitely didn’t have the kind of relationship where he felt like he could talk to Ramon about that sort of thing.

Struggles with school? Probably met with the blanket advice to buckle down, work harder, apply himself more (probably so he could get a good job and provide for his family.)

Maybe, MAYBE, he could talk to his dad about sports. He would probably also give similar advice, to work hard and practice more. But maybe he would actually talk details, and enjoy hearing about games and such.

What else would Eddie have not been able to talk to his dad about at this age? Thoughts?

9-1-1 (2018-) S07E10 🚒 All Fall Down

[becausebuckley]

michelle's buddie fic recs: week 38!

some more fics!! it’s been an excellent reading week!

this is a mix of fics with all ratings, so some include NSFW content. please take a look at both the ratings and the fic tags before reading!

if you come across something you like in this list, remember to show some love to the author by leaving kudos and a comment!

all you're giving me is friction | hammersmiths/@henswilsons | 7.9k | T

Eddie is new, and married, and Buck won’t stop flirting. 5+1. excellent team vibes and such a fun twist!!

family feud: first responders | Princessfbi/@princessfbi | 3.2k| G

The FireFam go on Family Feud. hilarious lovely fic that was so nice to read in 911 family feud week <3

ice cream before dinner | cloudydaisies | 58.6k | T

gerrard messes with the team's schedules and eddie 'i just drove my son to flee the state' diaz is the only option to watch mara and jee-yun after school on tuesdays, which, shouldn't be a problem at all, right? this made me cry. eddie and jee and mara <3

i'm here (i'm yours for the taking) | farfromthstars/@doeeyeseddie | 19.1k | T

at the winter wedding of an old friend, buck and eddie pretend to be married to each other. the plan has no weaknesses, obviously, not even mistletoe or anyone’s secret feelings… using this as a blanket rec for this author because i've been slowly making my way through all their fics and every single one of them hits the spot <3 but this one in particular has a lovely lovely pretend relationship and it's so good!!

invisible string (tying you to me) | bookinit/@bookinit02 | 5.3k | T

buck, eddie, and the intimacy of a properly-tied shoe. buck's acts of service <3 i love fics of buddie doing Totally Normal Friend Things hehe

i've only known you to keep your word | thisissirius/@thisissirius | 4.4k | M

buck's lonely and eddie knows. i love fics that go no no this man's not gonna be lonely anymore and this is exactly that <3

no thing defines a man (like love) | timeshareindestin/@timeshareindestin | 12.3k | T

the buckley parents are visiting LA for jee's 4th birthday. which is fine, except they don't know two things: 1. buck has hearing aids again, and 2. he's engaged to eddie. hard of hearing buck series my beloved <3 i love eddie's interactions with the buckley parents and the maddie convo!!

a reservoir in your eyes. | dylaesthetics | 7k | M

the Buddie roommates fic where Buck’s apartment burns down, Christopher teaches him Gen-Z slang, and Buck finally snaps. the buck and chris slang bit never fails to cheer me up!

You Ran Outside and Caught the Moon | yoddream/@yoddream | 47.8k | M

Eddie wants to tell him that it only happened yesterday, but then he thinks about quarantine, and when Shannon died, and when she left for LA after he was discharged, and when he found out Chris was diagnosed with cerebral palsy, and when Shannon told him she was pregnant, and when he was ten and his dad yelled at him for crashing his new truck because his mom was in labor and nobody was around to take her to the hospital. He thinks about how he wanted to disappear every time, wished for something to kill him so that he didn’t have to face his fears, deal with reality. It hits him like his dad’s truck hit the tree. mind the tags for this one but it's such a fantastic character study and exactly the fic i needed this week <3

[buddierecs]

hurt/comfort buddie fics

all mature rating!!! make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

leave the light on (i'll be coming home) - highly highly recommend this!!!!! by: HMSLusitania "an accident on a call leaves buck with custody of chris after eddie is... missing presumed. while they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite eddie's parents' best efforts -- a john doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home." word count: 44k important tags: presumed dead, grief, mourning, angst, amnesia, getting together

peace in austin by: angalwithwingsoffire "the story of evan buckley, losing all hope in la after the lawsuit and moving to texas to join the 126." word count: 156k important tags post-lawsuit, 911 lone star characters, angst, evan buckely leaves the 118, depression, ptsd, emotional hurt

just to be with you by: woodchoc_magnum "in which eddie and ana are dating, buck is secretly in love with him, and christopher isn't handling it well." word count: 147k important tags: pining, angst, secret relationship, lack of communication, found family, jealously the evolution of buddie (series) by insanejuliann "over time, eddie starts to wonder if everyone might actually be right when they joke about him and buck being more than friends." word count: 171k important tags: pre-relationship, oblivious!eddie diaz, eddie diaz pov internalised homophobia, getting together, slice of life

heart of flowers/heart of gold by elvensorceress "after nearly losing each other, buck and eddie find their way to each other and their family’s happily ever after." word count: 144k important tags: season 4, friends to lovers, mutual pining, evan buckley takes care of eddie diaz, demisexual!eddie diaz, gun shot wounds

like when the sun came out by: spaceprincessem "buck can see ghost au" word count: 39k important tags: mentions of suicide, supernatural elements, getting together, first kiss, angst

if i said you could never touch me by: marviless "in which buck is avoiding having sex with eddie." word count: 15k important tags discussions of sex as self-harm, developing relationship, unhealthy coping mechanisms, character study, fluff

fireflies where my caution should be by: littlesnowpea "there are people on the porch,” eddie says, voice even. “saying they want to meet their grandchild.” word count: 13k important tags: fake marriage, self-esteem issues, protective!eddiediaz, angst, bobby nash and athena grant being evan buckley's parents

general audience rating hurt/comfort fics explicit rating hurt/comfort fics

[cranberrymoons]

hi! i'm sage. I'm glad you're here!

you can find my writing on ao3 here and under the 'my fic' tag on this blog and in the masterlist under the read more. reblogs of other peoples' fic are tagged as 'fic', and writing resources etc are tagged as 'writing'

fic masterlist 🩷

look who's inside again 16,846 words | rated m | buckley-diaz family, chris character study, reconciliation, follow-up/prequel to i'm holding on (barely)

chris misses his dad. he misses his mom. he misses buck. he's still trying to figure out what it means that he misses them all in the same way.

close ain't close enough (til we cross the line) buddie | 9,884 words | rated e | infidelity, possessive sex

buck and eddie are not even approaching normal about each other; things escalate quickly (aka: the sexting fic, part 2)

don't slow this down buddie | rated e | 2,581 words | getting together, domesticity, intimacy, hand jobs

They’re twenty seven hours into ninety six off, three more days of nothing stretching out in front of them. Nothing but this, and Buck, and the early afternoon sun pouring in through the big loft windows. "I guess I don't have to go."

911

i'm holding on (barely) buddie + helena character study | 12,543 words | rated m

August comes, and with it comes Eddie. Eddie and that friend of his who was there back at the start of the summer, the one Christopher has talked so much about over the past few months. Buck this, and Buck that, and – All of it. Helena takes one look at them, and she knows. eddie and buck take christopher home to california; helena and ramon decide to follow

nothing wrong with me loving you buddie | 4,496 words | rated e | infidelity, sexting

He’s not thinking about it. He’s not. He’s definitely not. Buck leaves for the night, gets in his car and drives away like everything’s normal – normal because it is, it literally is, it’s the most normal night in the world, and Eddie is the most normal he’s ever been, and then maybe an hour later, he gets a text. buck and eddie watch red white and royal blue together; one thing leads to another (aka: the sexting fic)

breathe in, breathe through buddie | rated t | 1,045 words | 803 coda, pre-relationship, pining, bed sharing

Eddie blinks back at him, and Buck feels his heart give a lazy thump in his chest. “Long night,” he says after a moment. It’s the first thing either of them have said since they left the station, since they ended up here by silent agreement. Eddie nods, and Buck feels himself smile. “Did I tell you I got to steal a motorcycle?”

ring like silver, ring like gold buddie | rated e | 1,163 words | established relationship, car sex, being FREAKS about domesticity etc

“Did you see the way Parker’s mom was looking at you?” Gasps. Huffs against his neck where Eddie’s skin is flushed and hot, sticky from their mingled sweat and the flat expanse of Buck’s tongue. “Asking if you wanted to help chaperone the Spring Fling.” 

late night high (i'm floating) buddie | 1,649 words | rated e | drug use, self-realization, mustache burn 😌

eddie gets very very high and realizes several important things about himself; buck's just trying to follow along

an aching in my heart buddie | rated m | 1,154 words | first kiss, beach camping, poetry

It’s dark out here past the lights of the city, air crisp and fresh and new in a way that makes him feel like his lungs can finally fill up for the first time maybe ever in his whole life. No smoke. No smog. No haze of dust or ash hanging over everything and sneaking into the crevices. Just air and the salt spray of the sea and Eddie sitting next to him on the beach with their shoulders pressed together.

i'm a cliché (who cares) buddie | 7,326 words | rated e

“You okay?” Buck asks, and Eddie blinks, lets out the breath that had gotten caught in his throat. “Yeah,” he says, even though – no, not really. “Sorry, just – a surprise, I guess. Hearing from him.” Which is weird, come to think of it, because they used to be close. Closer than anything, as close as – well, as close as him and Buck, but in a different way. In a way that felt frantic and clinging and desperate, something to hold onto while they were being shot at. Eddie hears from an old army buddy; it brings a few things to the surface.

let me put my lips to something buddie | 2,524 words | rated e | blood kink, possessive sex

It’s a rush, having sex with Buck. And he thinks part of it is probably down to this, the fact that it’s something that finally feels right-sized after a lifetime of not. That’s a big part of it, but another part of it is that it’s him. Him. Everything. The way it feels like they could consume each other like fire and it still wouldn’t be enough.

we all fall down pre-buddie | 1,634 words | rated m | infidelity/angst

Buck hates that he was here for this. He hates that he was here for this, Eddie and his girlfriend and the fucked up thing with the woman who’s not Shannon, and Buck just standing there in the middle of it, the four of them trapped together in Eddie’s living room on a random Thursday night like something out of a soap opera because they all happened to converge at once. when the metaphorical house burns down, you don't want to be the only one left standing in it

closer than my hands have been buddie | 4,578 words, rated M

Eddie never feels easy. Tommy feels easy, but Eddie – he doesn’t. He doesn’t feel easy now, and he didn’t feel easy last night, and he didn’t feel easy the night before that or before that or before that. Well, except for the parts where he did, when everything felt easy and loose and uncomplicated. Free. He misses that feeling. buck and tommy are together, and eddie's fine with that. it's fine. it is.

i feel a change in the weather (i feel a change in me) buddie | 2,133 words | rated M

It all comes to a head on the hot dusty path up to the top of Runyon Canyon. It feels inevitable, feels like something they’ve maybe been inching toward in fits and starts ever since they met. Feels right and easy and lived-in already, like a favorite shirt that’s been folded in the back of the closet for years, just waiting to be picked up and put on. buck and eddie go for a hike, kiss in the sunlight, and fall in love, not necessarily in that order.

you and tequila make me crazy buddie | 1,533 words | rated M

His arm is still draped over Eddie’s shoulders, hand still holding the other side of his head, and he shifts so that his fingers push up into the hair at the back of his neck, thumb slotting up against his ear. And he’s so close. Half an inch closer and he’d be able to feel Eddie’s heartbeat under his tongue, solid and sure and alive, and – “Hey,” says a voice above them, sharp enough to cut straight through the fog that’s settled over them. “There you guys are.” in which buck and eddie lose chimney because they're drunk and horny

for the rest of mine buddie | 644 words | rated M

It happens on a Tuesday night, with the soft whirl of the dishwasher running in the kitchen and ESPN on low in the background and Chris’s homework left laying out on the coffee table when he went to bed about an hour ago. 

heart in throat (am i dreaming?) buddie | 1,227 words | rated T

I kissed someone, he imagines himself saying eventually, when he’s ready. I think I really like him. Just like that. No big announcement, no declaration, but just – just letting it sit there and breathe between them.

already standing on the ground buddie | 1,195 words | rated T

Buck lets out a laugh, one hand coming up to scratch at the back of his neck. Laughing like he’s relieved, like he can’t quite believe the words coming out of his own mouth. “We were on a date.” And – Eddie blinks. “Oh.”

such a sweet thing (i wanna do everything) bucktommy | 5,582 words | rated e

Buck doesn’t want to take it slow. He doesn’t want Tommy to ease him in or treat him gently. What he wants is to suck a dick.

stranger things

here you come again stommy | 16,172 words | rated e

Steve and Tommy haven't talked in nearly three years. After everything, maybe the best way forward is back.

so fondly today steddie | 8,267 words | rated E processing trauma, getting together | tumblr post

Eddie's hair is pulled up on top of his head, and there’s a piece of it falling down to frame his face, and Steve’s sleep-deprived brain sends a shock of want rushing through him. Want: he wants to touch? Wants to look? He’s looking. Wants to… something? He feels electricity crackle at the backs of his teeth and he blinks, wanting. Wanting so badly that something aches inside his chest. (it's been a few months since everything, and steve is beginning to realize some things about himself)

get it off your chest steddie | 7,415 words | rated E rough sex, spanking, read the ao3 tags! | tumblr post

“You think this is me taking you apart?” Eddie asks. He lets go of Steve’s hair and plants a hand in the center of his chest, then gives him a shove toward the bed. “That’s adorable, Steve. Seriously.” (or, steve and eddie have life-affirmingly good sex) aka my Consent Is Sexy manifesto

dressed up to the eyes steddie | 8,737 words | rated E rough sex, spanking, read the ao3 tags! | tumblr post

Steve almost didn’t come out tonight. It’s been a long day, and he kind of just wants to be at home in his sweatpants, curled up on the couch with takeout and an old movie, but – But he’d agreed to be social tonight – if nothing else, in Robin’s honor since she was supposed to have a date tonight but is trapped in bed with the flu – and so… here he is. Being social. Ish. Socialish. Steve and Eddie are strangers in a bar... or are they?

something so pretty steddie | 3,087 words | rated M | tumblr post

Eddie raises Steve's hand to brush a kiss over his knuckles, then catches him around the waist again, swaying them back and forth to the rhythm of a Bangles song coming from the radio. “I said you look pretty, and I meant it. Deal with it.” Steve feels a reluctant smile pull at the corners of his mouth. “Really?” (the girls paint steve's nails and it causes him to feel several enormous feelings)

can't start a fire steddie | 3,831 words | rated T | tumblr post

“Are you sure this is okay?” Steve asks in an undertone once everyone has arrived that first night. He looks genuinely nervous, which is… insane; he’s a bat-wielding, bat-biting jock who saved the world, and Eddie’s just – “I don’t think your friends like me very much.” Eddie feels the corners of his mouth draw down as he follows Steve’s eyeline to where the others are huddled in the corner talking amongst themselves. (steve doesn't need people taking care of him. except, maybe he kind of likes it when they do)

the sweetest thing steddie | 14,022 words | rated E

It had started out simple enough between them, Eddie making some off-hand comment about Steve not being able to hold out for a whole month and Steve, ever unable to back down from a challenge, rising to the bait. “Whatever,” he’d said, rolling his eyes. “A month? Please.” He could do a month. Easy. He just hadn't counted on Eddie being – well. Himself. eddie goads steve into a No Nut November challenge; he never said anything about taking it easy on him

the seas be ours (steddie pirates au) (2 works, 10,943 words, rated E)

Eddie The Dread Pirate Munson captures the Harrington heir with the intent of ransoming him back to his family for an easy payout. He really could not have guessed what he was getting himself into.

back in the new york groove (26,823 words, rated E) summer 1999 | tumblr post | ch 6/? rockstar eddie/middle school teacher steve, soft dom steve

“Ha!” Eddie says, jabbing a finger into Steve's chest. “I have a publicist. That automatically makes me cooler than you.” “Oh yeah? Well I have about eighty twelve year olds back in Santa Monica who think I’m the coolest guy on the planet.” (new york isn't home, but it's the next best thing) Steve and Eddie chaotically parenting their gen-z toddler in the late 90s (part of the future fic series)

future fic series (23 works, 64,995 words, rated G-E)

a love letter to the idea of home or, the happily-ever-after future in which Eddie is a rockstar and Steve is a middle school teacher and they have a bunch of kids and live by the ocean (rockstar eddie + middle school teacher steve)

a love to last past saturday night (3,550 words, rated T for now but will go up in later chapters) | ch 1/? coffee shop au

There’s a little cafe at the end of Steve’s block that he’s only ever been in once.  It’s called Corroded Coffee and it’s dark in there and maybe a little pretentious, but not pretentious as in… people reading classic novels or having discussions about French Cinema. Pretentious in the sense that there’s an intimidating collection of vinyl records taking up half an entire wall and they use single origin arabica beans and the scary baristas look at you sideways if you order regular milk in your latte.

misc. series:

kinktober 2023 (14 works, 39,566 words, rated T-E, stranger things)

a collection of fics written for kinktober 2023 and eddie month 2023 prompts – works can also be found on tumblr under the "kinktober 2023" tag

steddie microfic (16 works, 6,502 words, rated G-E, stranger things)

a collection of microfic written for the monthly steddiemicrofic challenges – works can also be found on tumblr under the "steddiemicrofic" tag

discord drabbles (16 works, 8,479 words, rated G-E, stranger things)

a collection of drabbles/microfics written for daily discord prompts – works can also be found on tumblr under the "discord drabble" tag

steddie holiday drabbles (29 works, 21,715 words, rated T-E, stranger things)

the 2023 fic advent calendar! a collection of fics between 300-1,000 words each, written for steddieholidaydrabbles' prompts and warm-up rounds – works can also be found on tumblr under the "steddieholidaydrabbles" tag

[fwtxl]

okay but Buck saying yes to being a their sperm donor is so him. This season for him is finding what he wants and who he is, and sure that’s what Buck begins was all about but with that he was looking for a place that he fit. People grow and change and as scary as that is no one stays the same they can feel the same on the inside, but things are always gonna change and with everything that’s gone on with Eddie and Taylor (him finally being the one who leaves first) he’s looking to do things for HIMSELF he needs to really find who he is now and not the him he was 4-5 years ago. if the writers do this all correctly and not mess it up it could honestly be a better story arc then him just being for spare parts because he’s so much more than that. This also really gives him a chance to REALLY see things (himself) the way others do because sure people can tell you your good, kind etc. but you don’t really fully believe it until you look hard enough at yourself. This becoming possibly a full circle moment for him and realizing he already has had a family and people who love him without conditions (him thinking he’s expandable when he not is prof no.1 that to him love and people caring needs to have conditions). This also just continues to leading back to the will and shooting Buck and Eddie might finally talk about it and how Buck as always been a dad to Chris and that’s how it plays into the interview that Oliver did when he said Buck steps more into a co parent more this season. Buck is finally gonna be able to see how amazing he is, but first he needs to figure out who is NOW and not who he was before.

- a little something I tweeted + and expansion of my thoughts

[kitkatpancakestack]

This post by @yramesoruniverse really got me thinking about Eddie's self-image.

I mean, we talk about Buck having self-worth issues, but Eddie? Good God. It's tragic in an entirely different way. I am not discounting Buck's character at all, let me be clear, and I have written metas about how beautiful and important it is, but Eddie's deserves a little love, too.

Buck is able to be a bit more loud with his insecurities, a bit more obvious. Eddie gets to hide behind his son. He gets to smile and talk about how much he loves his kid and rock the whole single dad thing and completely distract from the fact that none of this love is directed inward. Christopher is the mediating variable of Eddie's worth. In Eddie's eyes, Christopher confers a value on his life that wouldn't otherwise exist. Eddie is only palatable to the world by extension of his son, and so we have thus far seen all of his major plotlines circle around Christopher. I'm not saying this is bad, because he's a single parent and that's a huge part of his character's identity, I'm just saying it reveals a lot about him.

There have been god-tier metas out there about Eddie's relationship to his body, which I think also plays a huge role in this. His clinical approach to physical maintenance is driven by necessity. Keep himself in shape enough to be there for his son, to provide for his son, to not let his son down. None of it is self-care. None of it is selfish. None of it is for him.

I don't know where they plan to take Eddie's character, but at least from what I've seen during season 4 (especially the end), it feels like a shift inward. I can't think of a better story for Eddie than him allowing himself to exist in the world as a person who can ask for things. Who can need things, for himself, separate from his son. Who can reflect on his family and think what does Chris want? and then follow it up with What do I want? Something about him and Buck and the will scene just drips with insinuation. I think granting Buck permanency in his life was a huge, telling step in this road for doing things for himself. He held that information for a year, yes because he didn't want to burden Buck, but also because it was a purely selfish action he did for himself, one that was so unaligned with his existing perception of himself, and he probably needed the series of events from mid-S3 to the S4 finale to come to terms with it.

Idk man. Idk. I just love this stupid man so much. What a character. S5 better treat him well.

[fruitydiaz]

911 character studies ✯ Eddie Diaz

I spent my whole life trying not to be like you. All these years I, uh, I tried to...set a good example for you. Maybe...maybe it was the wrong one, I don't know. But I never understood why you were so angry with me. I—I...why it always felt like you were punishing me. Think I was punishing myself more. But I'm tired of being that guy. I'm going to be better. For Christopher. Mm. For myself.

[Image description: 8 gifs of Eddie Diaz from 9-1-1. Gif 1: Eddie struggles not to cry as he tells Buck how he pulled four people out of the helicopter crash in Afghanistan, but he didn’t save them. Gif 2: A close up of Eddie’s bloody hand shakily holding his St. Christopher medal up. Gif 3: A full length shot of Eddie as he faces away from the camera, slowly turning to face Buck off camera. Gif 4: Eddie walks in slow motion and pulls his firefighter’s helmet off after the dispatch fire. Gif 5: After Christopher tells Eddie he could be dead next year, Eddie looks up slowly, stricken. Gif 6: A close up of the note that Shannon wrote to Eddie when she left. The outside has his name written on it. The inside says, I need some time too. Gif 7: Eddie lies on the road, his head resting in a pool of his own blood as he reaches forward slowly, after being shot. Gif 8: The camera pans around Eddie, framed in bright orange-yellow light, as he holds his arms up in victory after winning a fight. /end ID.]

[stagefoureddiediaz]

11 Questions

Tagged by @theladyyavilee thank you 😎

Rules: Answer the following 11 questions and then ask 11 of your own and tag people

1. What is a topic that you like to research just for fun and have more than just average amounts of knowledge about? (not like something you studied, just something that really interests you)

Ok so this is pretty random, and technically it’s related to my job, but it’s a side project I work on for fun! My specialist subject is 17th century English Silk armour, but my research into it has lead me to the Mughal Empire and Akbar, (which has become another fascination for me because he’s such an interesting character!) and to Japan and the Edo dynasty!

2. What’s your love language, but instead of the normal list, you use this one?

Ooh a tough choice but I think eating together is going to win because it’s a time when you can be in each other’s presence and enjoy something as simple or fancy as you choose!

3. do you like the time right before sunrise, right as the sun is rising, right as the sun is going down or right after sunset best?

Hmmmm as the sun is going down I think, I’m a night owl so it’s the time of day when I feel most alive. And there is no greater joy in life than sitting on a cliff watching the sun descend into the ocean - it’s magical and spiritual!

4. What is your favorite type of cake?

Give me all the red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting 😋

5. What is a line from a movie/tv show or a book or a fanfic that has stuck with you for a really long time?

I have two

‘The Prince has read utopia’ from ever after is a line that randomly pops into my brain on a regular basis - it’s one of my favourite films - I had it on vhs as a child and watched it so many times I wore the tape out (how my asd and adhd didn’t get diagnosed until I was an adult is beyond me 🤦🏻‍♀️) and as a result I read utopia at the grand old age of 13!!

The other is ‘in vain I have struggled, it will not do’

From my beloved pride and prejudice- it’s a line I quote all the time because it’s so relatable - only that section (although I’ve read the book so many times I think I could probably recite it backwards by now!!) because I find so many things a struggle that quoting that line makes me smile and makes things seem a little less infuriating!!

6. Do you have like a go-to recipe you cook when cooking for other people, because you know you are good at making it?

I am Eddie - I cannot cook!! I’m not sure how I’ve survived these last few years of living on my own! But I can make exactly 1 meal - toad in the hole with cauliflower cheese, vegetables and gravy! It’s my ultimate comfort food!

7. if you had to live in isolation for one month with one of the 911 characters (preferably without murdering each other xD) which one would it be and why?

Eddie my beloved you’re gonna be stuck with me for a month and I’m going to pry open your brain and make you deal with your repression and trauma so when we’re free you are in a place to talk to Buck and Christopher and finish building the Buckley-Diaz family you’ve been working on since the day you joined the 118!!! (He may very well want to murder me by the time we were freed! 🤣)

8. what is one song that you like to listen to when you are in a really good mood? (think dancing in the kitchen, singing along at the top of your lungs with the windows open kinda good mood xD)

The Chariot by The Cat Empire - they’ve been my favourite band for nearly 20years their music has got me through some dark times and this song never fails to make me jump around and sing at the top of my lungs. If I’m feeling a bit down this is the song that will get me out of my funk.

9. if you could spend one day in the world of any of your favorite childhood stories, which would you choose

See this is such a good question, but also so hard because I’d love to visit the faraway tree, but I’d also really like to go to the haven and hang out with the fairies (from Artemis fowl!) not to mention discworld, but I think Narnia is always going to be the place I want to visit the most because I spent so much of my childhood checking every wardrobe to see if I could get to Narnia. (Fun story - growing up I had a playroom that I shared with my sister- it was next to my bedroom and because the wall was only a partition and I had a lockable old gentleman’s wardrobe, my mum cut a hole in the wall and took the back off the wardrobe so I could climb through into the playroom which mum painted to look like lantern waste - we even had a lamppost in the room!!

10. as a concept for magic in a fantasy book do you prefer emotion/intent/focus-based, spell/writing/words-based or potion/ingredient/material-based? or another concept alltogether?

Spell/writing/words based - I love when magic is shown as using ancient languages - Merlin did it really well - all the spells were from ancient English and Celtic languages (I learnt some ancient English as a result of Merlin 🤣🤣🤣)

11. If you had to chose one of these fanfic tropes to be the only one you got to read from now on, which one would it be: friends to lovers, mutual pining, hurt/comfort, found family (yes I know, these work best TOGETHER, that’s what makes this a hard question, because you only get fanfics that include NONE of the other tropes xD)

This is just mean!!! I’m going friends to lovers because it’s the one I relate to most as a Demi person!!

Ok here are my 11 questions!

1. If you could play one musical instrument and be really good at it, what would it be and why and what would you use this talent for??

2. If you could do one thing over, without affecting the space time continuum, what would you do and why?

3. If you got to appear in an episode of 911, which one would you be in and what would be your storyline?

4. What is the stupidest thing you’ve done I want to know all the gory details

5. What is your earliest memory?

6. What is the best compliment you’ve ever received? (Give us the context for it as well!)

7. What was the last lie you told and why did you feel the need to lie?

8. If money was no object, what will you be buying and why?

9. What is your favourite possession?

10. What does your name mean and why was it given to you (if you don’t want to reveal you real name, then tell me about your username 😎)

11. What’s the most unusual thing on your bucket list?

I’m tagging @reindeerbuckaroo @djdangerlove @lovecolibri @moniquekatie @outrunningthedark @reallysmartladymariecurie and @leothil

Don’t feel obliged to join in or tag anyone, and if anyone else would like to join in the fun please do!

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck & Eddie: Domestic dads and husbands

When Eddie let himself into Buck’s loft in 3x1 “Kids Today”, it was the first time the audience saw them together inside of one of their residences in CANON. Eddie being inside of the apartment where Buck was living in 2x4 “Stuck”, under the impression that he would be helping Maddie move, doesn’t count as one of those times because that wasn’t Buck’s place.  According to Eddie, it was his invisible girlfriend’s place which means Buck was just dwelling there until he finally left in 2x7 “Haunted”.

Eddie entering Buck’s loft with his own key without calling first and going upstairs to Buck’s bedroom should have alerted the audience to three things. First, it was obvious that it wasn’t the first time Eddie has let himself in without calling. Second, Eddie feels comfortable whenever he’s at Buck’s place, so comfortable in fact that he walks around like he’s at home whenever he’s there. Third, Buck is ok with Eddie being there and treating his place like it’s his own because he didn’t wake up after Eddie let himself in.  Buck lives in a loft which is a huge open space and the only rooms that have doors on them are the two bathrooms; therefore he should have woken up when Eddie opened the door but he didn’t. Also Buck is a firefighter and he’s trained to listen for noises while he sleeps which further confirms the first and second points of it not being the first time Eddie’s let himself in and that Eddie feels completely comfortable there.

They were being very domestic and it seemed like they were two dads sharing custody of their son.  One dad brought their son to spend time with his second dad because the first dad was tired of the second dad moping around after he quit his job, so he brought their son over to cheer him up.  Eddie took Christopher into the living room before he went upstairs and he didn’t tell Buck that Christopher was there.  After Eddie told Buck he had his whole life ahead of him and Buck prepared to go back upstairs, that’s when Christopher said, “Hey Buck!”.  Buck’s whole demeanor changed when he saw Christopher sitting on his couch; therefore Eddie knew Buck spending time with their son would be a good thing.  He didn’t ask Buck to watch Christopher, he just told him that’s what he would be doing for the day and after he said he had to go to work and told Buck to take Christopher out and have some fun, he left.

Eddie and Buck acted the same way HUSBANDS/SPOUSES act when they are sharing custody of their child.  They didn’t argue, they just had a discussion about the way Buck needed to get out of the house.  Buck’s already Christopher’s second dad and he loves and cares for him the same way Eddie does.  They’re a family and they have been for a long time.  Will there be more domestic Buck, Eddie and Christopher scenes in 6B? Only the showrunners, writers and producers know the answer to that question.

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck, Eddie & Christopher: Shades of Blue

Since 5x18 “Starting Over”, Buck, Eddie and Christopher have all worn lots of shirts/tops that were in different shades of blue.  Buck has primarily worn baby, light or sky blue; Eddie has worn azure, cobalt and navy, while Christopher has typically worn shades that both Buck and Eddie were wearing or have worn, i.e., his school uniform which includes a light blue button-down shirt with a navy-blue sweater. The color blue has a lot of significance and according to psychology experts, it symbolizes calmness, relaxation, responsibility and trust.  It’s highly unlikely that it was a coincidence for both Buck and Eddie to have worn blue suits (Eddie’s suit was navy with shades of cobalt in the jacket and Buck’s whole suit was light blue) to Henren’s vow renewal in 5x18.  In 6x1 “Let the Games Begin”, Buck’s and Christopher’s shirts were blue, grey and white (Christopher’s shirt was grey with white stripes and blue sleeves while Buck’s t-shirt was white and his button-down shirt was blue with grey stripes).  Buck’s shirt was a darker blue in 6x4 “Animal Instincts” and the jacket Eddie wore while he was sitting on his couch talking on Facetime with Ramon was an even darker shade of blue.  It was noticeable because Buck usually wears lighter shades of blue; therefore they both wore darker shades of blue for a reason and it could have something to do with their discussions about fatherhood and trust in that episode.  Buck and Christopher wore blue in 6x7 “Cursed” while Buck and Eddie wore blue in 6x8 “9-1-1 What’s Your Fantasy?”.  All three members of The Buckley-Diaz Family have worn the color blue several times over the past three months and it’s unlikely that it’s a coincidence.  Karen told Hen in 5x17 “Hero Complex”, “Once is a mistake. Twice is a coincidence.  Three times is a pattern.” and Athena told Eddie in 6x7 “Cursed”, “You know what I believe in even less than a curse? Coincidence!”  Both Karen and Athena were correct because Buck, Eddie and Christopher all wearing the color blue is not a coincidence; it’s a pattern, especially since it keeps happening.  Therefore they’re all wearing the same color in different shades for a specific purpose.  Buck and Eddie built their relationship on trust, they’re both responsible co-parents to Christopher, Eddie’s calm and relaxed since he went to therapy last season and hopefully Buck will eventually become calm, relaxed and at ease too after he finally has a breakdown in 6B. Will the pattern of them wearing the color blue continue into 6B?  Only the showrunners, writers, producers and wardrobe stylists know the answer to that question.

PIC 5x18 “Starting Over”-Eddie

PIC 5x18 “Starting Over”-Buck

PIC 5x18 “Starting Over”-Buck

PIC 5x18 “Starting Over”-Christopher

PIC 5x18 “Starting Over”-Eddie

PIC 6x1 “Let the Games Begin”-Buck

PIC 6x1 “Let the Games Begin”-Christopher

PIC 6x2 “Crash and Learn”-Buck

PIC 6x4 “Animal Instincts”-Buck

PIC 6x4 “Animal Instincts”-Eddie

PIC 6x4 “Animal Instincts”-Eddie

PIC 6x4 “Animal Instincts”-Christopher

PIC 6x5 “Home Invasion”-Christopher

PIC 6x7 “Cursed”-Christopher

PIC 6x7 “Cursed”-Buck

PIC 6x8 “9-1-1 What’s Your Fantasy?”-Eddie

PIC 6x8 “9-1-1 What’s Your Fantasy?”-Eddie

PIC 6x8 “9-1-1 What’s Your Fantasy?”-Eddie

PIC 6x8 “9-1-1 What’s Your Fantasy?”-Buck

[canonicallyobserving911]

Christopher probably told Buck about his crush but he didn’t tell Eddie.

Buck is the good cop parent and whenever Christopher feels like he can’t talk to Eddie about something, he goes straight to Buck (Good and Bad Cop).  It’s happened several times in CANON; therefore Christopher probably told Buck about his crush because they talk all the time and discuss EVERYTHING!  Also the way Buck didn’t verbally respond but shrugged his shoulders while they were talking about it in the firetruck illustrated the way he knew something but it’s likely he promised Christopher that he wouldn’t tell Eddie!  

Buck is Christopher’s cool dad, his legal guardian if anything were to happen to Eddie and his confidant.  Buck’s role in Christopher’s life provides him with a second parent who also provides him with a safe space to retreat whenever he feels like he needs to have a conversation with his cool dad.  Buck talks to Christopher like he’s an adult and there have been several times over the past 5 years when their relationship as father/son and/or legal guardian/child has been exhibited with their conversations and actions.  A few examples of Buck and Christopher’s dynamic have been included below.

Buck and Christopher have a trusted relationship and it started before they got caught in the Tsunami.  In 3x1 “Kids Today” Christopher gave Buck a card he made for him and it stated how Buck was an awesome firefighter.  They’ve always had a bond that’s built on trust the same way Eddie and Buck’s relationship is built.  Therefore Christopher knows that Buck will take care of him and his father the same way Eddie knows Buck will take care of him and Christopher. Buck and Christopher respect, learn from and take care of each other.

In 3x2 “Sink or Swim”, they had conversations about their futures.  Buck asked Christopher if he knew what he wanted to be when he grew up and Christopher responded, “An astronaut or a pirate”.  Buck told him those were some good choices and he would have cool outfits to wear too if he decided to pursue either of those professions.

After the Tsunami hit and they were waiting to be rescued while they sat on top of the ladder truck, Buck told Christopher that he amazed him.  When Christopher asked him why, Buck explained the way he had received some bad news about his job as a firefighter along with how he didn’t want to get out of bed for a week.  He asked Christopher what helped him to never give up and Christopher told him that he complained once but it didn’t work so he just kept swimming like Dory.

In 3x10 “Christmas Spirit”, Eddie told Hen that Christopher wouldn’t speak to him after he explained that he had to work on Christmas Day.

Since Christopher was upset with Eddie, he asked Buck if he could spend Christmas with him but Buck looked at Eddie and Eddie shook his head no.  Christopher’s question to Buck illustrates how he already knew which one of them was the good cop and which one was the bad cop.  Therefore Christopher knows which one of them he should ask a question when it’s something he wants because he knows who is going to say no and who will say yes.

In 4x3 “Future Tense”, after Eddie said they were taking a break from the internet, Christopher looked right at Buck and asked him if they could go to his house and play video games but Buck looked at Eddie just like he did in 3x10.  Then he told Christopher that they were going to play it old school for a while.

Eddie’s apprehension to technology and the future, prompted Buck and Christopher to conspire and work together so that they could prank him.  After Eddie opened the Hildy coffee maker that Buck ordered for him, Christopher immediately picked up their landline phone and quickly called Buck.  This illustrates two things (1) Christopher knows Buck’s phone number by heart or he knows which speed dial access number to use and (2) Buck and Christopher had been talking on the phone to each other long before they pranked Eddie.

In 4x8 “Breaking Point”, Eddie told Christopher that he started dating and Christopher became upset.  He pushed the salad bowl on the floor and it broke.  Afterwards, he took Eddie’s cell phone and ordered an Uber to Buck’s loft.  It was like Christopher said to himself, ‘I’m going to talk to my other dad’.

After Christopher arrived at Buck’s loft, Buck immediately called Eddie and while they waited for Eddie to arrive, Buck tried to get Christopher to explain what was bothering him.  He mentioned how Christopher had been there for him when he needed to talk and continued with how he wanted to be there for Christopher.

Christopher asked Buck if he would promise him that the people he missed, due to the pandemic, would come back and Buck not only promised him that they would; he also said that he wasn’t going anywhere.

In 4x14 “Survivors” Buck and Christopher comforted each other after Eddie had been shot by a sniper.  Christopher told Buck that it was going to be ok and they both cried and consoled each other.

Based on the way Buck answered his cell phone with “Hey Chris” in 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia” along with the way Christopher used his own cell phone to call Buck during Eddie’s breakdown, it’s evident that they call each other often.  Buck had a huge smile on his face until he heard the distress in Christopher’s voice.  Christopher knew who to call and he didn’t hesitate to call Buck for help.  He could have called 9-1-1 but Christopher needed his second dad.

In 6x8 “9-1-1 What’s Your Fantasy?”, Eddie was helping Christopher with the suit he was planning to wear to the dance and when Christopher asked him if he could get a haircut, Eddie was shocked.  Then he asked Christopher if he had a hot date but Christopher blushed, said “No! Geez!” and tried to change the subject when he told Eddie and Carla that he needed to change clothes which meant he wanted them to leave his room.

When Eddie and Carla went into the kitchen, Eddie tried to figure out what was going on with Christopher, so Carla spoke up and said he was excited about the dance and that he probably had his first crush.  Eddie responded, “First Crush? Wow! That’s Great! But I wonder why he didn’t tell me about it”.  Eddie was completely in the dark but his facial expression showed the way he was concerned since Christopher didn’t talk to him about any of it.

It was still bothering him while the 118 was out on a call because he told them about Christopher’s crush.  Buck spoke up and asked Eddie if Christopher was too young to date but Eddie explained that they were just going to the dance.  Once they got on the firetruck, the conversation continued and after Eddie said, “Christopher isn’t kissing anyone”, he looked at Buck like he always does when he wants to know if Christopher told Buck something that he hasn’t told Eddie.  But Buck tilted his head to the side as if to say, ‘Hmmm’ but he didn’t verbally respond.  Eddie responded to Buck’s head turn with “He’s not!” but Buck shrugged his shoulders and looked down like he was trying to hide the fact that he already knows about the person Christopher has a crush on.  His non-verbal response was VERY LOUD!  If Buck doesn’t know anything about Christopher’s crush then he would have said something but he didn’t. He just played it off and tried to deflect the same way Christopher did when Eddie asked him if he had a hot date while they were fitting Christopher’s suit.

All of the conversations Buck and Christopher had prior to 6x8 illustrated several things; (1) how much they trust each other, (2) the way that Christopher views Buck as his second parent and (3) the way Buck continues to provide Christopher with a safe space when he needs to talk to someone other than Eddie.  Since Buck and Christopher’s relationship is built on trust, it’s very likely that Christopher told Buck about his crush, asked him not to say anything and then asked him to promise.  Buck takes promises very seriously especially since he and Maddie used “pinky promises” when they were kids and sometimes they still use them as adults like they did in 3x16 “The One that Got Away” and in 4x4 “9-1-1 What’s Your Grievance?”.  Buck probably promised Christopher that he wouldn’t say anything to anyone regarding his crush, including Eddie.  If that’s what happened, then Buck kept his end of the deal by not confirming or denying that he knows about Christopher’s crush while still acknowledging that he was listening to Eddie rant about whether Christopher had been kissing someone.

Christopher has two dads; Eddie is the bad cop and Buck is the good cop and after Buck and Eddie become a romantic couple, Christopher will continue to have two dads that he can go to whenever he needs them. When the time comes and Christopher needs to have the “birds and the bees” discussion, then he might ask Buck first instead of Eddie because Buck’s the cool dad who will tell him everything he needs to know in order to protect himself and his partner.  If it happens that way, Buck will not exclude Eddie from the conversation which means he will do just like he did in 4x8, tell Eddie what’s going on so that everyone in their family is on the same page even if Christopher asks him to promise because that’s a big topic with too many possible consequences for Eddie to be excluded. That’s the way their family dynamic has been and the way it will probably continue.

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck & Eddie: Chris’ conversations with his two dads

Christopher has conversations with Eddie and Buck all the time and some of the things he said to them were parallels.  He’s encouraged, consoled and even joked with them. They’re a family and they are always there for each other.  

1. GIF 5x6 “Brawl in Cell Block 9-1-1″ When Eddie made it home after the hostage situation was over, he went to check on Chris.  Chris woke up and said, “You’re weird dad” after Eddie told him that he was glad he was his kid.

2. GIF 6x1 “Let the Games Begin” Chris told Buck “It’s weird” when Buck asked him what him not having a couch had to do with him being fire captain.

3. GIF 3x2 “Sink or Swim” Chris told Buck right before the Tsunami hit, “You’re going to be ok kid” since Buck was sad about not being able to go back to work.

4. GIF 5x18 “Starting Over” Chris told Eddie, “Remember, talking about it makes it less scary” after Eddie reminded him that he had an appointment later that day which meant Carla would pick him up from school.

5. GIF 3x12 “Fools” When Eddie asked Chris if he knew what he couldn’t do, Chris said, “Cook” and they both laughed.

6. GIF 5x11 “Outside Looking In” After Eddie said, “All this time everybody thought I was a bad cook.” Christopher said, “You were”.

7. GIF 4x14 “Survivors” Chris consoled and comforted Buck when he said, “It’s going to be ok Buck” after Eddie had been shot.

8. GIF 5x14 “Dumb Luck” Chris noticed how quiet Eddie was being while he was preparing their dinner and after Chris asked him if he was ok, he then said, “You seem sad”.

9. GIF 5x11 “Outside Looking In” Chris asked Eddie why he quit firefighting and after he responded, “I thought you wanted me to quit”, Chris said, “I never said that”.

10. GIF 4x8 “Breaking Point” After Buck ended his call with Eddie, he said, “So I heard about you blowing up at your dad” but Christopher responded, “I don’t want to talk about it”.

11. GIF 3x10 “Christmas Spirit” Chris asked Buck if he could spend Christmas with him but when Buck had to tell him that he had to work like Eddie did, Christopher then said, “Stupid work”.

12. GIF 5x14 “Dumb Luck” Christopher asked the Equine Therapy tour guide when he could ride one of the horses and she explained to him there were a lot of things they would do first so the horses would learn to trust him, Christopher said, “That sounds like work”.

13. GIF 4x3 “Future Tense” Christopher asked Buck if they could go to his house and play video games but after Buck saw the look on Eddie’s face, he responded they would have to play it old school for a while and Chris asked him, “What’s old school?”

14. GIF 6x4 “Animal Instincts” Chris told Eddie that he bought the wrong brand of mayo and Eddie told him it was on sale.  Chris then said, “You know dad, sometimes you get what you pay for”.

15. GIF 3x1 “Kids Today” During Buck’s welcome back to the 118 party, Christopher gave him a card that he made for him and when Buck said, “Wow this is great” Chris responded, “It’s you and me”.

16. GIF 6x5 “Home Invasion” After Hoover the dog made a mess in the kitchen, Chris called for Eddie and after Eddie said, “I thought Hen was exaggerating” Chris said, “I don’t think he likes being alone. Maybe he has separation anxiety”.

[canonicallyobserving911]

So...Buck can hang out with every 118 parent and child relationship EXCEPT FOR EDDIE AND CHRISTOPHER? YEAH...9-1-1 Make it make sense because Buck is literally co-parenting Christopher with Eddie.

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck’s loft is NOT his home because Eddie's house is where he belongs.

It appears 9-1-1 hinted at the way Buck's loft has "never fit" into the life he wants for himself, i.e., a spouse, a child and/or children, and a house.  He really wants a family to come home to instead of him going back to his empty loft after working a long grueling shift at the firehouse.  It would have been better if he or someone else would have been allowed to just say that during 6A but it seems like that would have been too easy. His loft has mainly been shown as just a place where he dwells but he was depressed after the ladder truck explosion and his embolism, he experienced two breakups inside of those walls (the first one in 2x18 “This Life We Choose when girlfriend #2 broke up with him and the last one in 5x18 “Starting Over” when he broke up with girlfriend #3) and Maddie told him their parents were coming to visit in 4x4 “9-1-1 What’s Your Grievance?” as they sat on his couch; therefore the loft holds a few bad memories for him.

All of the memories he’s had while living there haven’t been bad because he’s had some good experiences there too including 3x3 “The Searchers” when Eddie brought Christopher back to him after the Tsunami and told him “There’s nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you”.

In 3x9 “Fallout” when he apologized to Eddie after the lawsuit for the second time and he played video games with Eddie and Christopher. The time he spent with them was fantastic in 6x1 “Let the Games Begin” when he cooked a perfect 6-cheese lasagna for his Diaz boys.

One issue is Buck has never really considered the loft to be his home because in 3x11 “Seize the Day” he told Maddie “This is Eddie’s house, I’m not really a guest” which could mean he’s always known that he wanted to build a family, a life and a forever with Eddie.

More than once during 6A his loft was shown to "not fit" the type of life he so desperately wants for himself and even though he told Connor and Kameron in 6x4 “Animal Instincts” that he doesn’t know what he wants, it seems like that was a LIE because Buck’s facial expressions have shown who and what he wants many times like he did in 4x14 “Survivors” while he gazed at Eddie and Christopher from Eddie’s front door after Eddie was discharged from the hospital and Buck drove him home.

In 6x1 he hadn't replaced his couch after he broke up with TK which means his "family" didn’t have anywhere to sit together in his living room like they did in 3x9 while they ate pizza and played video games.  Christopher told Buck it was weird that he didn’t have a couch while Buck was still cooking their dinner but Buck was happy and smiling the whole time Eddie and Christopher were there with him.

In 6x4 before Connor arrived to further manipulate him into being their sperm donor, Buck looked both solemn and sad while he was getting ready to pour himself a cup of coffee/tea. When Connor and Kameron went to his loft so that he could tell them if he was going to be their sperm donor, he told them that he didn't know what he wanted for himself (he lied) but he still agreed to be their donor in the end without considering how it would affect him in the long run.

In 6x5 “Home Invasion” Buck was enjoying having Hoover the dog there with him but when he started barking, his landlord knocked on his door and reminded him that he wasn't supposed to have a dog. Only cats are allowed in the loft.

In 6x8 “9-1-1 What’s Your Fantasy?” while he was babysitting Jee-Yun, when she tried to go upstairs, he panicked because stairs aren't for babies.

In 6x9 “Red Flag” he was finally able to fall asleep because he was settling to have a piece of himself included in a family even if the end results in them having a child with his DNA won’t make him happy.  He did the same thing in 5x7 “Ghost Stories”, after TK invaded his loft way before he ever asked her to move in, he clung to and settled for a relationship with her even though he was unhappy.  He accepted it because he believed that was all he could have so he went to sleep and left her awake while she sat there worrying about her dad’s upcoming parole hearing. Now he thinks Kameron being pregnant is going to fix his feelings of loneliness but it won't because if the baby Kameron is carrying is the result of his sperm donation, then the baby STILL won’t be his. Therefore he’s continuing to settle for whatever he thinks will fill the hole he’s had in his heart for years.

Buck's loft only has one bedroom and it's upstairs; he still doesn't have a couch and every time he goes home after work, it seems like he doesn't want to be there. In 5x3 “Desperate Measures” it was clear that he wanted someone to be there waiting for him especially after he plopped on his bed and said, "Hi honey, I'm home". Eddie's house is THE ONLY PLACE THAT BUCK HAS EVER SAID HE'S NOT A GUEST and that illustrated the way he's always known where his home is and who his family is too.  He’s never said that about Maddie’s place even though he lived with her in season 2 after Chimney kicked him out of his apartment which happened not long after he left his first girlfriend’s apartment in 2x7 “Haunted”.

Also Buck’s loft is not fit for a baby and the show clearly illustrated that while he was babysitting Jee-Yun in 6x8. There’s nowhere for him to put a crib and there’s no second bedroom for a child to sleep in.  Buck’s loft may have initially been a good fit for him six years ago because he was younger but now that he’s older, his mindset needs to change and he has to start thinking about the things he really wants in life in order to change his surroundings.  His couch is waiting for him at Eddie’s house but he has to admit the family he chose to build with Eddie and Christopher is what he wants.

Eddie and Christopher have been waiting for Buck to realize they are his family but it seems like Buck and Eddie are too scared to admit what they both want and need from each other.  The first half of season 6 ended with Eddie being frustrated and abruptly disconnecting from the four-way call he was on with Buck, Hen and Chimney after Buck made his announcement.  It also ended with Buck seeming to be a bit delusional about the baby since he bought an LAFD onesie that may or may not be a gift he was planning to give to Connor and Kameron. Therefore it will be interesting to see if any of Buck’s and Eddie’s problems are addressed in 6B.  There are several other things they still need to talk about including The Shooting so will they finally be allowed to discuss their shared traumas so that Buck will FINALLY understand the family he so desperately wants has been waiting for him this whole time? Only the showrunners, writers and producers know the answer to that question.