#christi you will always be famous!

[bawnjourno]

photos from the Interior Design vinyl

(photography by Christi Haydon, scanned by me)

[grusinskayas]

watching the poirot tv series episode of death on the nile today

[mikedfaist]

so invested in famous!reader and her lore… does she have close friends in the industry besides Mike? What does the media/general public think of her? Does she have a crazy fan base?

I love her and want to give her a hug. 🥹 thank you!!! 🫶🏻

Just call me the Drake Passage because you’re crossing dangerous waters, my friend.

She does have many close friends in the industry. To name one, Kathryn Gallagher, who was on Broadway for Jagged Little Pill. Lauren Patten was also in that production, and she worked with Mike in Days of Rage, so everything is connected in some way it seems. Victoria Pedretti, Lili Reinhart, and Florence Pugh are just another few. She also has ongoing beef with Kendall Jenner that seems to resurface once a year.

In her younger years, the media pinned her as a big party girl, and it was common for her to make headlines when she was seen having dinner with a guy or leaving a bar with friends. As she’s gotten older, and she’s retreated from the media, it seems they’ve changed their attitude toward her, but they’ve always been supportive of her, but not always the most respectful…but that’s Hollywood, baby.

As for fans, she’s blessed to have fans that aren’t too much. They don’t crowd her and overwhelm her – though, I will say they were guilty of that in the past, but people grow. Fans who spot her in Ohio are very reluctant to approach her, but if they do, it’s a very polite and quiet exchange, and she’ll sign whatever they want signed, maybe even take a photo, and then she’s on her way.

Here’s a story: She, Mike, and their friends are all at a bar one night, and a couple fans are sitting at the bar top when they notice her sitting in a booth. She’s sitting in the inner part of the booth, and Mike has his arm strung over her shoulders, so she’s hidden well, but she’s nevertheless seen. They don’t want to bother her; she looks so happy and carefree; they figure they’ll just watch her from afar for a while and then talk about their encounter on Twitter.

Mike ends up going up to the bar to get more drinks, and this is when the girls see their shot. They had quickly written little notes for her, how much she means to them, and the songs and albums she’s done that have resonated with them deeply over the years. They hesitantly ask Mike if he can give them to her, because they don’t want to bother her, but he’s insistent they come to the table to meet her. If she wasn’t in the mood to meet fans, he would know.

The girls are shaking as they follow Mike back to their table, and they swear they black out during the encounter. She signs the inside of an Agatha Christie book one of the girls had in their purse, and the back of a Dollar General receipt. They also take pictures, thanks to Mike’s immaculate photography skills, and the only request was to post anything after midnight to guarantee she’s left the establishment.

Just met [reader] and Mike at a bar in Columbus… I haven’t stopped shaking. She signed my Dollar General receipt and became visibly upset when she noticed I paid $3 for my sunglasses. “What’s the fucking point being called Dollar General if you’re going to extort your customers?” She smelled so good, and complimented my Pedro Pascal shirt. Mike looked so good and he was so nice. It makes perfect sense why she likes him. Literally saw him kiss with my own two eyes so anyone who says it’s a stunt can suck my fat dick. Homeboy isn’t down bad with bedroom eyes for you to be saying they aren’t in love. Eat it.

Our famous would later like this post.

[dailyrothko]

ik its taboo to ask but, what do you see in rothkos work? Why do you like it?

It's not taboo! But I have answered this many times before so, I might direct you here or here for random examples of my answers and just add a bit, perhaps retreading...

Rothko gets singled out for being famous and looking simple (though it's not not) but I don't feel the criteria is different than it would be for any other artist.

My favorite artists, Munch, Bearden, Hokusai, Bill Traylor, Ruth Asawa etc., what do they have in common? Just the basics of form, color and light and the emotion that is carried through them.

I don't feel like the public always has great taste but I do subscribe to the idea that Rothko would not have endured if his work did not have meaning to some. And some of those people were Joan Mitchell, Brice Marden, Helen Frankenthaler, Motherwell, Pollock, Elaine De Kooning, Tracey Emin, Robert Ryman etc. Other fine artists blown away by these seemingly simplistic works. This doesn't mean you have like Rothko or any artist but you know here we are the the Rothko detractors kind of amuse me, not for their taste but rather for their arguments.

I think a lot of people just aren't exposed in person to a wide variety of art and when you see things in the flesh, so to speak, it's a wildly different experience than the world of looking at computers. And art museums are also places people react to thinks as a group and it's an interesting footnote to see how art affects people, sometimes it can make you think.

I have devoted so much to time to Rothko, sometimes I have asked myself why, maybe he's not as good as I think, I see them everyday, it can be tiring to research and post and be involved with it.

And then, I see one again or, as in the last two weeks, I see shots from the Paris show (I couldn't afford to go but they did invite me) and again I am struck by what a really exceptional artist he was. How no one else does what he does and how I have a great feeling for his particular expression.

And Rothko the person, who could bloviate occasionally, was an exceptional character of great dedication to art and to his idea. I have known lots of artists and his intense commitment to an idea, that was not popular, that was not making him money, that had not been done before, was a relentless pursuit. I admire that too.

Detractors would have to you believe silly things about art, embarrassing things not seated in the normal "Does nothing for me" argument which is a great argument about any artist. Rather they want to say it's the emperor's new clothes and frankly, while that's cool if you believe it, the technical merit argument is so hollow and silly, I never even know what to say to these people. The reductive standard is basically the best painting of a cat is the one that looks the most like a cat, and if you believe that, buy a camera and save yourself some money.

Even yesterday with the Christie's sale, and the orange/yellow Rothko, which is certainly not one of my favorites, Photographer Mark Cashion (thanks Mark) sent me this shot. And I was just impressed again, kind of in the opposite way that his detractors feel. They see someone doing nothing and I see someone creating a huge amount from very little.

Thank you so much for the question , sorry, as always to prattle on.

[cakexblankett]

Character

Gwendoline Christie

Rating

Green

Words

1.668

AU where Gwendoline is a writer.

~•~

You looked up at the sky, the sun shining bright above your head. Although it was still February, it was warm and the sky was clear.

It reminded you of the day when it all happened, when the start of the end took place.

You entered the library where the signing was at, and went in line. You kept thinking of her, wondering if she'd changed or if she was still the same, good looking and witty woman you used to love.

"Next!"

You waited for the person in front of you to go away before taking two steps forward. Coming into view was her, Gwendoline, smiling. She looked up and that smile faded.

You grinned, putting your copy of the book on the table. It had been long since you last saw eachother, so her surprise was normal. You hadn't talked in quiet a while too, you almost forgot what her voice sounded like. Almost, because you kept hearing her calling you in your dreams.

"Hey."

She blinked, astonished. She couldn't believe her eyes, seeing you there could only be a miracle or a prank. But it didn't matter, because she missed you like you missed her, and seeing you there, dressed fancy like you were about to go to a red carpet, she didn't know what to do. There were a lot of things she wanted to say, a lot of "I'm sorry" and "forgive me", but it wasn't the place nor the time.

"H-hey..."

You gazed at her, at her deep, blue eyes, at her red, plump lips- you wondered if she was wearing the lipstick you gifted her months ago, before your breakup. Your eyes went to the small scar on her upper lip.

"It was nice of you to come here today."

Her voice shook for a moment and she had to cough to regain her composure. She couldn't possibly let you see how your presence was making her crumble. She thought you were gone from her life, forever, altough she had always harboured a small hope in her heart, hope that you would come back to her, hope that she didn't messed up things that badly for you to walk away. You were gone for so long, that hope had gotten smaller and weaker every passing week, yet there you were, with your suit and tie on, looking as beautiful as ever.

"I couldn't have possibly missed this oppurtunity."

You knew you were making a mistake, going back to the one who broke your heart in millions of small pieces, but maybe she changed, maybe you were wrong for thinking she didn't love you or miss you. Maybe it was time to let it all behind and start from scratch.

"Hm."

She took your copy of the magazine and autographed it. You remembered when she used to tell you how wonderful it would be if somebody would read her book, how awesome it would be if her name became famous. You smiled to yourself, seeing her now, with hundreds of people waiting in line for her to sign their copies of her book, the one that she made you read in advance as she was writing it.

"So..."

She looked up, her eyes locking with yours. You stayed there for a second, still, in complete silence. It felt like hours, you saw your future in those eyes, you felt calm and somehow, all your worries and thoughts about the past disappeared. You only saw her, her blonde locks of hair cascading beautifully on her shoulders. You almost went to touch her, to feel the smoothness of her hair in your hand, maybe caress her while she talked about her day and how she missed you.

But then her eyes darted away from yours and the moment of peace faded. A man approached her and told her to move faster, since there were still a lot of people in line. She nodded, apologizing.

You smiled. You missed hearing her voice, you missed hearing that english accent that made her sound refined and sophisticated, which she was. She was a queen, born to rule and to be served and admired, and you were eager to be the peasant who bringed her gifts and who made her feel loved when her king couldn't.

You grimaced. A king. A flashback of that day came into your mind, your thoughts clouded with tears, screams, sadness and anger. You tried to shake the thoughts away, anxiety and remorse and fear washing over you, like it was happening again, in that exact moment.

She looked up at you and, when she saw your face, she knew what you were thinking about. She felt small, powerless, weak and, above all, sorry. She knew what she did was wrong, she knew it would have made you suffer, yet she continued seeing him, even when you two were a couple, happy and content with the life you had. She felt so stupid, so embarassed of her actions, but the past is the past and she couldn't change her choices. She couldn't make your suffering go away, even if she wanted to. And she did, she would have done anything to make those dark thoughts running in you head disappear, but she didn't know how. So it was better if she walked away from your life, forever.

"Thank you again for coming."

You nodded, taking back the book. Your hands touched for a second, but it was enough for a jolt of electricity to run inside your veins. You felt your blood boil at the thought of her hands touching another person, her soft and delicate fingers run along another person's hair. You remembered the wonders her touch did, when you two used to lie naked on your bed, kissing and touching eachother, searching for love on her body while she searched it on yours. And you were sure she found it, you certainly did. But maybe it wasn't the case, since she soon started to search it on someone else.

"Thank you for signing the book. It was very well written,  congratulations."

She smiled, a forced smile. You couldn't decipher her expression, if she was annoyed or simply trying to not cry. You returned the smile and walked away with the book in hand. She watched you exit the library, her eye lingering on your body. She loved you, the way you walked, the way you talked, the way you looked at her, with so much passion and love. It was all gone, though, and it was too late to do anything about it now. So she watched you leave, regret eating her alive.

You glanced back for a second, seeing her greet another person, with a fake smile plastered on her graceful face. Since when she became so good at faking? She used to be the most sincere person in the world, or, at least, that's what you thought. But she cheated on you, hiding it for so long. You felt so stupid, how could you not see it, how could you not have sensed that she wasn't being real with you?

You blamed yourself for so long, you felt like it was your fault. Maybe you didn't love her enough, maybe she wanted more than you could gave her. But you swore you gave everything you had, your love, your loyalty, your attention, your devotion. Everything.

Her name became famous, she was happy with someone else, she didn't need you anymore. You were so dumb for thinking that, maybe, you still had a chance. You immagined that, walking in that library, she would have said "sorry" and hugged you, asking you to come back. But her heart was in the arms of someone else, there was nothing to do.

You walked away from the library, sad and angry at yourself. Seeing her only made things more difficult. How could you forget her? How could you not love her? She was perfect, she was kind, funny, smart, and so full of love. You remembered all the evenings spent laughing and joking while you two shared a glass of wine, trying to solve riddles or playing board games near the fireplace. Sometimes you watched horror movies, your bodies pressed one against the other, the movies didn't seem so horrific with her.

"Y/N!"

You turned around, seeing Gwendoline run towards you, her high heels clicking on the concrete. You took in her running figure. She was taller than you remembered, maybe it was because of the shoes. Her brows were furrowed, a small line forming between them. You loved her little wrinkles.

"Y/N..."

She gazed at you for a moment, reminiscing all the splendid moments she had with you. Your shared appartment, with two small kittens playing around, while she made you breakfast while you still slept. She used to love watching you sleep just after she woke up. Your messy hair, your half opened mouth, while her hand cupped your face. She was joyous of her life with you, but something was missing, and she soon started to searching it in someone else.

"Gwendoline."

You two were still, one in front of the other, your face looking up while she looked down. She didn't find that something in anyone, but she couldn't abandon him, especially after she made him think he was the most important person in her life. But he was wrong, because you were, and she knew she would find that something only in you. Maybe she should have asked, she should have talked to you about it, but she was scared.

"Don't leave."

You smiled.

"I would never."

She returned the smiled.

Things would be different, things would work out fine. She just needed to ask you and you would give, she just needed to talk and you would listen, she just needed to like you and you would love her. Forever.

[joesalw]

Ok, that's gonna be long one.

One jet is around $50 million. She has two. And now she had the ig tracking account taken down claiming that's an invasion of privacy. Very interesting considering the account existed for a few years and she didn't have any problems with it and now suddenly she gets called out for abusing the environment it's become invasive. The lady is shady. And the fact that her answer about not going to therapy is 'i feel very sane'. Oof. She's republican raised for sure. Those people think that any mental health issue equals clinical insanity and if you're seeing a therapist there must be something wrong with you.

She's jumping from one relationship to another and doesn't even know who she is. She just molds into whatever her man wants or what looks best for the image. She doesn't know how to exist on her own. For someone who presents herself as a 'girlboss' she sure doesn't have a sense of self-worth and always has to have a man next to her. No matter how bigoted he may be. She's not getting any younger so she's getting desperate and that's probably why she's unleashing on Joe. If she wants a kid, she doesn't have much time left so she latches on to every man throwing themselves at her in hopes of a happily ever after. It doesn't work like that. Fix yourself first then move on to look for someone to build a life and future with. There's no way any sane grown man would want a self-sabotaging, fight-picking, obsessive overgrown teenager with no sense of boundaries to even marry let alone have a child with. She doesn't know where her public life ends and private one begins.

I'm sure Joe saw all of that and dipped. It's not good to bring a child in that environment. And if they'd ever had one, she'd go on with her life and he'd be a house husband. I've never seen TS as maternal, nurturing or even mature enough to have a child because she seems not to have the capacity to take care of herself. In 2016 Joe was the one who took care of her and 'saved her'. It wasn't her own doing. And when he left, she started spiraling again. She portrayed herself as a mature grown woman in her 2020 albums and that turned out to be a farce. She's still that same insecure 16 year-old but richer, more influential and famous. Her recent interviews are a solid proof of that.

Her music is also nothing special. Some generic pop with repetitive and recycled melodies. She's not a vocalist, not a dancer, doesn't have a superb instrument skill, there's barely any emotion in every song she sings. Her lyrical topics are the same and don't hold any though provoking themes. She uses nonsensical metaphors and uncommonly used words to make her lyrics look better and herself seem smarter. It doesn't change the point of the song though. Argumentative antithetical dream girl is just a glamorous way of saying manic. Machiavellian is a way of saying manipulative, being morally indifferent and self-serving, lacking empathy. Sure does sound nice, huh? "I'm only cryptic and Machiavellian (manipulative, selfish, deceptive, cunning. call it whatever you want) 'cause I care". Machiavellianism in psychology is described as one of the traits in the Dark triad model. Right along narcissism and psychopathy. Mastermind is masterminding out in the open and no one bats an eye. The psychologists that named the trait after Niccolo Machiavelli said that one of the core features is lack of concern for conventional morality (they aren't concerned about the morality of lying and cheating). If you're into psychology Richard Christie and Florence L. Geis (the ones that named the trait) have a book "Studies in Machiavellianism" which is a pretty good and insightful read.

(just my assumption) I'm sure Joe dropped that word on her and she was like 'ooh, sounds nice and Machiavelli was like very political, a bit controversial and cool and people refer to him a lot, I'll definitely be using that in a song'. lmao. little did she know. I think she thought he meant it in a political sense and not a psychological one. Which are totally different things. And I'm sure he was like 'lol, she thought'.

There're a ton of celebrities bringing her up on talk-shows as well. At least once a week there's a bit on some show about a certain celeb's interaction with her. As someone who enjoys learning english trough media that's quite disturbing. I see her everywhere, TV shows, news articles, social media outlets. She's becoming inescapable. And that makes me wonder about the proportion of celebrities and journalists who genuinely like her and the ones who bring her up to get more attention. God forbid you say anything negative about her. Her Karen army will immediately send death threats your way, make fun of every aspect of your life or even dox you. And with her silence she's enabling this behaviour because she's a self-proclaimed Machiavellian (whether she chose a psychological meaning for the song or not) and doesn't care what her minions do as long as she doesn't get called out for it.

She only allows non-critical journalists to interview her. I mean, what kind of self-suck is that? An interview should be a form of discussion and not an ass kissing session. Any negative article about her will have your whole outlet blacklisted from interacting with her and her team. She needs to be in full control of the narrative all the damn time because she knows that once she lets go of the rein all of the skeletons in her closet will fall out on their own.

She's digging her own grave and I'm here for it. Last time she could make Kim and Kanye the villains and this time she'll have no one to blame but herself. Her narcissistic flat ass would make Tree the scapegoat if there's no one else she could point her finger to. It's always someone else's fault but hers. A chronic victim of this cruel patriarchal world.

I have studied psychology briefly and have learned about the dark triad and machiavellianism. What's surprising to me is that high mach people can gain advantage in the short run but ultimately lose their power in the long run because people start seeing through their surface level acting, which is what we're seeing through her behaviour right now. She acts to be an activist only when it benefits her. But swifties have so much obsession with her that even if they find it disturbing, they will try to justify it. Also idk how Taylor flexes about her machiavellianism, like to me that's not something to be proud of, the ends do not justify the means when you hurt so many people in the process. The fact that she's accepting she's cunning, manipulative, deceptive and lies to get things according to her own interest tells a lot about who she is as a person! no wonder why Joe didn’t want to marry her. Her machiavellianism trait only benefitted her in the short run

[balrogballs]

You mentioned you're a writer irl and having read your fics I'm not surprised! It makes me ridiculously happy to know that published authors still have the time/energy to write fanfiction (aka the only form of written literature that is still Innocent and Unsullied, if you ask me) I dream of being published myself. Any words of advice for an aspiring author? (more specifically, how does one get a literary agent?)

Thank you so much and yes absolutely! I always, always have time for fanfiction — I think some folk, especially in the literary fiction genre, tend to look down their nose at it and say it isn't "real writing" but my hill to die on is that a) it is real writing, and b) prior to the deal I never published a thing irl, and didnt do an MFA but have written fanfic since I was 12 and it genuinely is the way I developed my writing style. Will put the advicey bit under the cut

(disclaimer that I'm not Agatha Christie 2, I am simply little old balrogballs, so my advice defo isn't expert or even particularly qualified hahaha 🥹)

(below bit is as per my experience with litfic, I'm not sure which genre you write in but it may be a little different with genre fic, and more different still with non fiction)

The querying phase is genuinely hellish, and the biggest zone for rejection, with many of the top top agents not even reading query letters let alone manuscript. My main piece of advice here is — look for upcoming/new/fresh agents at established agencies, and submit to them. Whilst they themselves may not have a lengthy track record, they would be operating in an environment that would support them with established contacts, editor introductions, training in negotiations etc, that make it more likely for you to get a good deal.

Anecdotally, my agent is very established, and represents multiple Booker winners and a Nobel winner — understandably, she hadn't even read my manuscript when I first submitted to her, she pressed reject at query stage after reading my letter. A couple months later, I submitted to a fresh intern at the same agency, who wasn't repping litfic, but she passed the manuscript to said top agent and I got an offer within the week though my agent probably won't take intern recommendations anymore because imagine representing Booker winners only to have some deranged 25 y/o debut drag her into a meeting about elf sex fanfics...

But yes generally speaking, it definitely helps to look out for smaller fish in, er, famous ponds!

Other than that, I'd say really pore over agents wishlist (usually on the agency's website or the Query Tracker site — latter is VERY useful as a resource) and hardcore tailor your cover letter to align with it as that's the first impression they get. Also, if you're based in either US/UK, query in your country as the first port of call before switching over to the other side of the pond. But if you write for an English speaking audience and don't live in either of the above, you can query in both US and UK!

Hope this has helped, and v sorry if it's too long I am simply unable to ever stfu

[taylor-on-your-dash]

SO, WHO IS THE SONG MINE ABOUT?

A couple of years ago I read this comment on r/Taylor Swift about Taylor dating a non famous guy who attended Belmont University.

I started college in Nashville in 2010, and the semester before I started, it was well known that Taylor was seeing a guy who lived on campus. It never made headlines because he wasn’t a celebrity like her other relationships. I have seen lots of random explanations for “Mine,” but many students at the university always assumed it was about this guy because the timeline fit.

At the time, I didn't think much of it. I thought that it could've been possible but still, the theory of Mine being about Cory Monteith made more sense to me.

While I was writing the Speak Now Timeline, one of the most important interviews was the Billboard one:

"Mine" was a turning point in the album’s development. It wasn’t until early 2010 when the album truly began to coalesce. Swift presented "Mine" to Borchetta in his office, just a few doors down the hall from the leather couch in the lobby. "We probably played that song four or five times," Borchetta recalls. "I’m jumping around playing air guitar, she’s singing the song back to me, and it was just one of those crazy, fun, Taylor teen-age moments." And then it got serious. "I said, ‘Keep going,’ " Borchetta says. "She kind of looked at me like, ‘You’re challenging me.’ And I said, ‘Yeah. You’ve found true north here. Keep going.’ " It was some time in the period after that challenge — between February and June — that Swift wrote “Innocent,” her response to the Kanye West incident.

That settled it then, no? Mine was written in late February, after Taylor had returned from Tokyo.

My certainties crumbled a few weeks ago, when @1989worldtour sent me an interview where Taylor says that she wrote Mine on the road, specifically in Texas.

Back To December was written in New York City, The Story Of Us was in Nashville, I wrote Mine somewhere on the road, I think in Texas, actually. (X)

Taylor was in Texas on March 10th (in Austin), March 11th (Dallas), and March 12th (Corpus Christi) for the Fearless Tour. At first, this didn't make any sense to me: Taylor had said that she wrote Mine in February! Then again, she often misremembers dates. I had shelved this date in my mind until I randomly found this comment on r/Fauxmoi while I was researching Starlight and the Kennedy craze Taylor went through.

She dated a guy from Belmont I think because a family friend went there and was friends with him and was there the night they met! “By the water” in Mine is apparently about Mozarts - a coffee shop in Austin on the water where they went on a date. I have no way to verify this because it didn’t happen to me but the family friend had pics with Taylor and stuff because of this guy she was friends with who dated Taylor. This might be the only piece of celeb gossip I’ve ever known haha.

Reply: This is true! He's now married with kids and not at all famous.

The return of the Belmont guy! We have two other sources claiming that she dated a non-famous person who attended Belmont. The mention of Texas cemented the fact that there might be a kernel of truth in this theory. At this point, I took this rumor seriously and chose to investigate further. the next question was, if Belmont is in Nashville and the Mozart bar is in Texas, didn't the guy miss a lot of classes? The answer is... no. If you look at the Belmont Academic Calendar, guess when Spring Break was? From March 8th to March 15th! So even if the guy was in college, he didn't miss any classes. There's was plenty of time for him to fly to Texas, attend the show, going on a date at the Mozart bar and then fly back to Nashville.

There's another problem though: according to the Billboard interview, Taylor brought Mine to Scott Borchetta in late February. We don't actually have a direct quote from Taylor or Borchetta saying that it was February. It could be Taylor or Scott misremembering, It could be the journalist inferring (it has happened before, for example on this Rolling Stone article from 2009, where the author said that Love Story and White Horse were for the same person, for some weird reason). After all, late February and early March aren't that far away. Nathan Chapman, the producer of the song, said that they worked on Mine on and off for 4 months. They finished it on July 21st, so March 10th still tracks.

Now, let's look at the actual bar. on the left, we have a screenshot from the Music Video, while on the right, a picture of the Mozart Bar. they look very similar to me, but I admit that I've never been to the USA, so maybe coffee shops all look the same?

Fun fact: The Mozart bar confirmed that she has been there in May 2013, after the Red Tour show.

Conclusions: Honestly, I believe those people on Reddit, but I realise that the sources are very unstable. What makes me believe it though, is the obscure mention of Mine being written in Texas, and the person on Reddit revealing that they had a date at a bar that casually is by the water. It fits perfectly. I don't have any more to say for now, but it's possible that I'll write a post of how Mine is one of the first post John Mayer song and how that relationship affected the themes of her songwriting.

P.S.: I would advise not contacting these people on Reddit. it's obvious that they're friends with him/know him and they wouldn't say anything to help identifying him. plus, it's not our place to gather information about a person that wants anonymity. it's not cool to doxx random people.

[tiny-buzz]

The year is 3021. Nude Gingrich has been elected president of the Galaxy. (You already know this! You already know this.)

“Regis Weekend is cancelled, forever,” says Nude in his inaugural address. “It’s the future and you can never leave the future.”

“Why come I can’t celebrate Regis Weekend” bemoans Chris Christie X, famous celebrity of the future, seconds before he is obliterated by an orbital cannon for questioning Nude Gingrich.

“Hello,” says Charlize Theron vampishly, still looking great after all these years.

The Future Is So Bright, I’ve Got To Wear Shades, And Nothing Else, Because I Am Nude, Which Is The Law, Here In The Bright Future

Betty Boop: 3021 reboot in production hell.

“Food is illegal. Water is illegal. Take off your clothes” says Galactic President to ten billion humans and human-equivalent-motorized-analogue-neohumans (H.E.M.A.N.s)

“Today is the day Nude became President,” says Danish House DJ W.O.L.F.F.B.L.I.T.Z.E.R.R.R.R.R.R.

“Why I have always hated clothes,” the most shared article on the homepage of the future’s New New New York Times, seconds before it is obliterated by an orbital cannon (mistakenly as it was supporting Nude Gingrich).

“Check out my biceps,” says Nude, in space, to God (God lives there).

Terrifying? You bet. But that (the above) is the future. One POSSIBLE future. Anything can happen. Are you a Calvinist? Do you believe in predestination? When we tell you that Regis Weekend has been extended through Tuesday, October 3 (it has been), what will you do?

Can you bring him back?

Can you change the future?

[some-triangles]

The song that's been in my head for the last month and change is Beeswing by the folk-rock legend Richard Thompson. It's become kind of a modern folk standard - in Ireland, particularly, as far as I can tell. Richard Thompson is one of those people who you suspect of being a genius and also of being an asshole. He's got a famous Bitter Divorce Record to his name but he may be the only person to have recorded one with the woman he was divorcing. He has never been as famous or as rich as his talent would suggest he should be and he seems very aware of it.  He’s one of my favorite guitarists.

Beeswing itself is your classic song about a girl which is actually about the guy singing, his regrets at the road not taken, growing old, etc.  Here’s Richard:

Man, I’d like to be able to play like that.

It isn’t the first result that comes up when you search for Beeswing on YouTube, though.  That one belongs to Christy Moore:

Christy is another folk-rock legend, but he’s even less rich and famous than Richard.  He’s a leftist and an Irish republican, also, whereas Richard is your standard liberal who wasn’t too proud to accept an OBE.  In this video Christy never mentions who wrote the song - he’s only singing it as a tribute to his dead friend, who liked it - and he also fixes it.  He removes Richard’s beautiful but showy guitarwork, rearranges the verses, snips little words here and adds them in there.  He streamlines it, clarifies it, takes out the weirdly violent part, and manages to make the song, in some way, about its putative subject.  I wonder if he did this pointedly or if he was just a craftsman at his work. 

In doing this he created a fork in the song’s history.  There are covers of both versions online - for the most part, the polished ones follow Richard’s, the raw ones follow Christy’s.   Some of the latter seem to be reaching for a third subject of the song, which isn’t wistfulness for a girl who symbolizes an imagined lost freedom or genuine tenderness for the actual woman but anger at the system that makes you pay such a steep price for the chains that you refuse.

So the Irish own this song now. 

This post doesn’t have a moral - it’s just me clearing out my latest mini-fixation to make room for the next one.  But it’s always good to remember that you lose ownership of your art the second you put it in front of other people, and that it doesn’t ultimately matter what you meant by it if someone looks at it and sees something better.

[eirinstiva]

The Man with the Watches

Five years after the supposed death of Sherlock Holmes at the Reichenbach Falls, this story featuring a quote from an un-named criminal investigator appeared in the Strand Magazine. Could this person have been Sherlock Holmes? You may decide for yourself…

New letter from my dear friend Watson and... surprise! It's "The Story of the Man with the Watches", part of Round The Fire series. This is the third time I read this story and always lefts my heart aching.

This start with a very tall man and a woman who looked like father and daughter. They arrived at the station and refused to share a smoking compartment with a very surprised man.

[Illustration by Frank Craig in The Strand Magazine (1898)]

The train stops briefly at Willesden at 5:12pm, and then again at Rugby at 6:50pm where the open door of a first-class carriage attracts notice. The three passengers have now vanished, and in their carriage is the body of a young man who has been shot through the heart. There is no clue to his identity but, oddly, he is in possession of six valuable gold watches, all of American manufacture…

[llustration by Manuel Orazi in Du mystérieux au tragique (1911)]

Mystery murders on trains are a classic trope, probably the most famous is Murder on the Orient Express by Agatha Christie. Similar cases can be found in Detective Conan and Moriarty the Patriot. There's a reference too in Ron Kamonohashi's: Forbidden Deductions opening:

What makes this story peculiar is the subtext in the relationship between Sparrow MacCoy and Edward. There's an older and captivating criminal with a younger man crossdressing doing crimes in different cities. His brother James tried to get Edward back in "the right way", but everything ended with the tragic death of Edward in the train. MacCoy is shown as a ruthless criminal, expert card-sharper and very bad influence for young Edward, but after the murder we see a sensible side of MacCoy, who takes care of James after they fell from the train.

[Illustration by Frank Craig in The Strand Magazine (1898)]

Maybe Arthur Conan Doyle wasn't a writer of queer stories, but this one follows the typical "gay tragedy" trope that it was pretty common until last years. As Graham Robb said in Strangers: Homosexual Love in the Nineteeth Century:

"Gay tragedy is a tradition, not just a circumstantial feature. This is one of the clearest signs that 19th-century gay literature was not a parasitic sub-section of 'serious' literature. It had a discret life on its own and was far more influential that it seems."

Also: who is this "well-known criminal investigator"? Sherlock Holmes? He was in some part of the world dismantling Moriarty's criminal organisation. Mycroft Holmes? Maybe Watson trying to follow Sherlock's style, or Lestrade... This is a new case to solve. ✨

[dufferpuffer]

what types of books do you think remus would be into, if any? i see a lot of people tend to view him as a big fan of ancient greek/roman literature or just classics in general and while i do like the idea I'm very curious on what your thoughts would be about it.

Remus book taste HC:

Mysteries, Murders, Detectives - the occasional Spy or Sci-fi... the occasional sweet romance, and the occasional cheap smut. He likes stories of regular, unassuming people being clever and righteous, going on adventures - and getting to know others on a deep, personal level, even if it is just to 'read' them for a case. Non-Fiction - especially when he was a kid - especially magical.

For comics he likes comedy and children's adventures (not heroes)

More below:

I do think he is a bit of a bookworm. It's something quiet to do between jobs, while traveling, while resting (when it isn't too exhausting to read) that takes his mind off of reality for awhile. Being unable to make friends as a kid he probably read a lot then, too.

His father working - his Muggle mother was likely home taking care of him and homeschooling him, so he would be very familiar with Muggle authors, though his dad would have passed down Wizarding stories too. I like to think his mother, an imaginative woman, enjoyed them just as much. They left out any story with a Big Bad Wolf.

I think he would have always struggled a little with stories about friends going on adventures (The Famous Five/The Secret Seven, that sort of thing) - but have loved them the most. The idea of a group of friends going on adventures, solving mysteries was just... an impossible dream. Reading them was bittersweet.

For similar reasons - superhero stories didn't fully appeal. Someone having secret powers, or transforming, wearing a costume so nobody could recognize them... it just didn't hit for him. It felt a little sad that they had to hide themselves, too... that they had to work so hard just because they had a 'responsibility' to keep others safe.

With a dad whose job was studying non-beings, and probably took him out on adventures to find little Dark Creatures and such - He would have devoured non-fiction. Especially magical non-fiction. Seeing the world made him feel more connected with it - and he could talk to his dad about stuff when he was home.

He has a slight taste for the morbid, the dark, the spooky - it's what his life is after all. There's catharsis in engaging with terror when you're in control of it for once, when it is just a story. Spooky stories - as he got older, proper mysteries became his favourite. Agatha Christie is a beloved Muggle author and his mother jumped on the chance to introduce him, as cliche as that is. (It was something Albus picked up on - and shared with him. Agatha was just a little younger than him, and he was rather enamored with her publishing's as they were coming out - he has a personal collection of first editions.)

He stuck with mystery's as he got older, too - the best part about them was they were often about an unassuming hero, a simple detective or a lovely old lady, working largely on their own to do the right thing. Using their minds and never quite trusting anyone. THAT speaks to him far more than any superhero.

Muggle sci-fi could be fun, as could Spy novels... ...But his guilty pleasure, one that physically hurts him to read in the MOST bittersweet way, is romance. Romance and Porn. He rarely does it - it's embarrassing, for one thing - but he longs for connection... and the constant "Wife strangled her husband to death" of murder stories can get depressing.

Sometimes he wants to read about an awkward, stern but thoughtful guy falling for a simple, bubbly dame... he can experience a little bit of love and romance in his life, though he knows its impossible. Sometimes he also wants to read about a flock of Veela fucking the absolute brains out of an unsuspecting captured researcher, too.

With all the stereotypes of "Werewolf libido" (which are not true) he feels guilty engaging with his sexuality at all... stories about men being able to safely let go, lose control and be looked after are a weakness.

He was caught once reading a romance novel at school - and was teased for it by his friends. They'd all look at raunchy magazines together, they were teens. He pretended to be less interested. "Come on Moony - isn't it close to Full Moon? Where's your fire?!" Just another jeer he shook his head at... and worried whether or not the stereotypes were true. He should push it all down, just in case...

... I don't really see the 'classic literature' or 'Roman/Greek' angle. Why? To make him seem smart? He reads old plays from an ancient Muggle period - and 'the classics'...? What enjoyment does he get from that? Like where does that specifically piece into his character? I can see him enjoying some classics, and enjoying some Roman stuff, sure - but he never comes across as a history buff. He comes across as a lonely nerd.

[pinktinselmonstrosity]

every book i read in july + august!

it's that time again!! forgot to do this at the end of july because of my dissertation, and have also read a few really long books which have slowed me down considerably. but here we go!!

The Old Woman With the Knife by Gu Byeong-Mo

I really enjoyed this! It's a well-paced thriller about an old woman facing problems at work, struggling with her age and dealing with her much younger coworkers. oh, and she's an assassin. very enjoyable, has the vibe of a good thriller movie.

The Murder of Roger Ackroyd by Agatha Christie

Christie was one of my favourite authors as a kid but it's been ages since I've read any of her books, and i was very glad to find they absolutely still stand up! I even knew the twist going into this one but it didn't ruin the experience at all, I was still gripped. They're so well written - i love how she writes characters who really feel like people you could know.

The Overstory by Richard Powers

This book was completely unexpected and so brilliant. It follows the lives of seven complete strangers, starting in the late 1800s to the present day. They're brought together at various points in their lives because they all have the same goal - to stop deforestation and protect america's trees. It's so much more tree-y than you could imagaine, there's one character who has a near death experience and starts hearing trees talk to her. I was compelled by all the characters and I always love books that show strangers touching each other's lives. It is very long (more than 600 pages) and, like I said, very tree-y, so be warned, but still enjoyable.

Call for the Dead by John le Carré

I absolutely loved this!! The first George Smiley book, and I understand why he's such a famous character now. Every character is SO fully formed, which I don't usually expect from thrillers, but that's why le Carré is the best!! The plot of this one wasn't quite as perfect as The Spy Who Came in From the Cold, but it was still really good. Can't wait to read more!!

Lanark: a Life in Four Books by Alasdair Gray

I think it's fair to say this is the weirdest book I have ever read. Like, I can't even conceive of how one human could come up with this.

It is, like the title says, a life in four books; book 1 is about a boy growing up in post-war Glasgow, book 2 is about that same boy becoming a starving artist, book 3 is that boy arriving in a dystopian reimagining of Glasgow called Unthank, where he starts turning into a dragon and is then swallowed by a portal into a mysterious facility called The Institute where he's hired as a doctor to cure other people who are turning into dragons, and in book 4 he returns to Unthank, becomes a politician against his will, grapples with the hopelessness of late-stage capitalism, meets god, and then dies. Also, the books appear in the novel in this order: 3, 1, 2, 4. And that's really only a brief summary, there is so much more weirdness than that!

It's absolutely mental; I'll admit I found it hardgoing in places, and I read to a very high level. I wanted to read it before I left Glasgow, and I do feel a certain Glaswegian-ness about it that I really enjoy - it's one of those books where the city is really another character (even in the dystopian sections), and in this case it's one I actually recognise. It's not for the fainthearted, and it's definitely not a casual read, but if you're up for it I would definitely recommend!

The Forgery by Ave Barrera

This was absolutely brilliant! It's about an artist in Guadalajara who is hired by a wealthy client to forge a painting. However, everything is not as it seems, and things start to go seriously wrong. It feels like one of those books that's going to become a classic. Would highly, highly recommend!!

Dark Places by Gillian Flynn

I wanted a good thriller, and Gillian Flynn always delivers. This should really be classed as a horror novel; it's one of those thrillers that goes beyond 'exciting, compelling, mystery' into the territory of 'these are the worst things human beings can do to one another'. Reading it almost makes you feel dirty. I loved it

Silverview by John le Carré

This was probably my least favourite le Carré novel I've read so far - and it was brilliant. It's a standalone, unlike the others I've read which were all part of the Smiley series; it is also his last novel, published posthumously in 2022. I think the change in time frame makes a significant difference to the overall vibe - espionage is very different in the present day, when this novel is set, than in the 60s and 70s when the Smiley novels are set. This made for an interesting change - it was also fascinating to see le Carré's perspective of the modern world show through this novel, compared to the older ones I've read previously. I really enjoyed it.

Study for Obedience by Sarah Bernstein

This one didn't quite land for me. I just didn't fully understand what it was trying to do, or how it was trying to do it. I felt it wasn't very developed, which is maybe a product of how short it is, or maybe that's the point and I just didn't get it? I don't know. I found the prose quite difficult to read, not because it was particularly complicated but because it has lots of needlessly long sentences. I think this is supposed to make the prose seem like speech, but for me it just made it irritating to read. Wouldn't recommend this one, but it was shortlisted for the Booker prize so what do I know!

Headshot by Rita Bullwinkel

This was absolutely brilliant. Set over two days, it follows the eight competitors in the 'Daughters of America' girl's boxing tournament. Most of the narrative takes place solely within the fights themselves, revealing the details of the girls' characters, past, present, and future, all within the moments of the fight. It was very unusual but (in my opinion) it really worked. It kind of replicates the feeling of watching a boxing match, exciting and kind of viscerally sickening at the same time. I loved it.

Currently Reading: The Silk Roads by Peter Frankopan

Five years after starting my history degree I have finally overcome my aversion to reading history for fun! This is such a good one to start with, absolutely fascinating (even if i am getting slightly frustrated by the lack of detail in some sections - in the scope of a 600 page book spanning almost 3000 years of history, it makes sense that specific archaeological sites only warrant a couple of sentences, but I'm used to reading entire papers about that one site and I'm hungry for more detail lol). Posting this now because there's no way I'm finishing this one before the end of the month.

On My Radar: I really don't know! I have a huge tbr shelf to choose from now that all my books are in (almost) the same place. I am feeling like reading some more Agatha Christie - maybe I'm regressing to childhood interests in the face of a major transformative period of life, or maybe they're just really good? I don't know. It's also possible that it'll take me a month to read The Silk Roads, so who knows!

If you read this far then tell me what you're currently reading in the tags/replies! Or just a good book you read recently, or a bad one, or one you're looking forward to - i'm unemployed, living with my parents, and i've got covid, please talk to me 😭

[o-uncle-newt]

Cabin Pressure Advent Day 16: Paris

PAAAAAARRRRRRIIIISSSS!

There are not words for how much I love this episode, there really aren't. I actually listened to it early this morning because I was so excited, and then had to deal with a difficult personal situation and was like "oh dang I wish I hadn't listened to it yet so I could cheer up from it now!" But I had, so I listened to Hot Desk (from Double Acts) instead. Also very effective.

Anyway- I love everything about this episode, because I LOVE Golden Age mysteries! I'm not super well read on all the different authors, but I've had a lot of fun over the years reading Conan Doyle (and Poe and Wilkie Collins, if we're going that far back), Chesterton, Christie, and more recently Sayers, and even more recently have read a smattering as well of John Dickson Carr, Margery Allingham, Anthony Berkeley, and a bunch of others. To digress a little, I highly highly recommend Martin Edwards's excellent book The Golden Age of Murder and his wonderful short-story anthology compilations and reprints- it really got me on a kick of trying to read a bit more broadly in the genre after discovering how much I loved reading a few specific authors growing up. It's been really rewarding and I highly recommend it!

Now, the thing with Paris is that the popular backstory is "John Finnemore had Benedict Cumberbatch on the show, he became famous as Sherlock on Sherlock, Finnemore thought it would be funny to do a mystery themed one as a result, and so we have Marin Crieff as "Miss Marple." Which is apparently not UNtrue per se, but JF himself has said that he always planned to do a mystery episode. Which makes sense, as in the first link just now JF makes clear that Golden Age mysteries are his "trashy fiction of choice," about which I can only say amen!

Which is what makes the episode so great- because it's super clear what kind of love for the genre he put into the episode as a result. There's the Christie- obviously the Miss Marple references but also the "gathering everyone together in the parlor" thing (which she doesn't do ALL the time... but she does PRETTY often lol). There's obviously the Conan Doyle reference, which is "snappily put," as Douglas says. There's a fun reference to Raffles- who may not be a detective himself but is definitely a cousin to the whodunnit genre (or shall we say brother-in-law, as he was Conan Doyle's...), and there's "Crieff of the Yard," which is a phrase that I'm confident has a basis in detective writing but that I'm not able to pinpoint, which is annoying. Arthur's example of the monkey at the circus also evokes a few stories of MASSIVELY varying quality involving unlikely murderous animals, which is always fun. (And parenthetically, while there are no Sayers references that I can find, I will say that I continue to be confident that the dog-collar plotline in Here's What We Do from Double Acts is a reference to the dog-collar plotline in Gaudy Night. He has never confirmed it but like, how could it not be? Or at least so I tell myself.)

But all of that is window dressing- the episode itself is a beautifully written impossible crime mystery, and I love that about it. JF has mentioned that he likes John Dickson Carr, who was big for locked room mysteries/impossible crimes- though loads of writers wrote them (including, incidentally, AA Milne, who you likely know better from Winnie the Pooh, who wrote a fun early example of the genre that you can read here for free because of that magical phenomenon, copyright expiration). And this episode is just such a good example of one that it makes me wish that JF would get into the whodunnit-writing game more broadly (beyond his Cain's Jawbone sequel). If Richard Osman can do it...!

In one of the above-linked blogposts, JF mentions that it's "pleasing how naturally my main cast fitted into familiar roles from the detective fiction genre - the meticulous detective, his devoted assistant, his no nonsense boss… and his nemesis, the Napoleon of crime." Which is awesome, but I think there's even more there. I particularly love that it's an impossible crime mystery in a closed circle. While there's a genre of whodunnit where you have the corpse or whatever and have to cast a wide net to find witnesses and clues, writers there often either have to make the potential dead ends in the detective work REALLY interesting or rely a lot on coincidence. Closed circle crimes (like ones at a country house or within a workplace or somewhere with guards at all the doors or something like that) can help mystery writers focus in on the story without having to worry too much about the logistics of "why these people?" and it's why you get so many mysteries set on trains or ships or islands or whatever. And an airplane is one of the best closed circles there is, because unless you're DB Cooper you're not getting out. Agatha Christie did an early one in Death in the Clouds which is a lot of fun, and this episode is a great example.

The fun thing about closed circle whodunnits and impossible crime mysteries is that the whole point of them is that usually, the author is just straight up lying to you. There's a vent for a snake to go through, or a secret doorway to the outside, or the time when the door was locked or the circle was closed isn't actually when the crime took place, but a fake gunshot makes you think it was. And that's why I love this so much- because the author/liar of the mystery is Douglas. He's the genre savvy one. He's the one who's lying, he's the one who's turning it all into a whodunnit, and he's waiting to see if he can get away with it. He's the Napoleon of Crime- and a Columbo villain setting up the false trail that he hopes Columbo will fall for.

Because... and JF notes this in both blog posts... there's no mystery here! Obviously Douglas did it. The point here is that this episode is like if Columbo was as dumb as he seemed and the criminal managed to lead him down the garden path and got away with it. It's "what if Poirot were a moron but still had to solve the murder of Roger Ackroyd." Douglas is the one who creates an impossible crime scheme, anticipates that he'll still be suspected because, well, he's him, and manages to come up with alternative scenarios- including ones that open the seemingly closed circle of the crime- that are convincing enough to throw Martin off the scent. Without him, it would just be "so how did Douglas do it this time?"

Now, the impossible crime is still important, because while we all kind of know that Douglas did it, we still don't know how he did it. And from that perspective alone, JF's impossible crime puzzle is genius. The clues that he drops are really interesting (I'm not 100% sure I see the nail polish bottle as being fair play, but plenty of whodunnits aren't so I don't really care) and it's something that, even as we see Douglas writing a whole separate decoy mystery (reminiscent of his decoy apple juice?) on top of his own scheme, keeps us intrigued throughout even once it becomes pretty clear that Douglas has been snowing all of them. So all of that is fun- but it's far more fun with all the other tropes and schemes and false trails laid on top of it, giving it so many more dimensions.

And then, at the end, nobody solves it- the detective's reveal, after all the carefully left false trails, comes from the thief himself.

It's just... so beautiful. Ahhhh.

I feel like (and one of the blog posts mentions this) that there's a question of whether Douglas actually pulled it off, particularly in the context of whether Martin would really need to pay Carolyn at the end. My opinion is: practically, yes, Douglas stole the whiskey. If Birling hadn't offered them the cufflinks, he'd never have revealed his trick and he'd have had ample opportunity the rest of the trip to empty his decoy apple juice in the sink, replace it with whiskey, and fill up the bottle with cheap whiskey from the plane's bar or the Paris airport duty free. (Or whatever his plan was- but that seems plausible.) Carolyn would have never known once they returned. And the episode leaves open whether practically speaking Martin actually does have to pay Carolyn, but thematically... yes, of course he does, the whole question here is "is Douglas the organ grinder" and the answer is that he obviously is. The monkey's gotta pay up!

I love, incidentally, so many more things about this episode- the humor, Mr Birling, the ways in which everything is so true to character, basically everything about Arthur... but I've already gone on long enough.

[itsthenovelteafactor]

TV Shows Roundup: July - Dec

This year I’ve been tracking every TV show I watched with notes on my impressions. I’ve watched a lot, most quite good, and a lot that surprised me. Probably going to keep up this habit in the new year (I love a spreadsheet), and curious why y’all have been watching as well!

Worth noting that my average viewing comes to less than one episode a day, so while this list is very long, I promise I do things other than watch TV.

Bodies:

Honestly, the plot and mystery of what was going on were so engaging I did not realize how much I had come to care about the characters until something bad happened to them and I was utterly distraught, which is one of the highest endorsements I can give.

The Alienist (season 2):

Obsessed with the vibes of this one! It’s super gothic, and a compelling mystery. For some reason, I have no recollection of this season ever having been announced/released so it was a nice surprise to discover it existed! Highly recommended to horror mystery fans who enjoy moody period pieces.

The Umbrella Academy (season 4):

I really, really wanted to like this. This series as a whole has been such a comfort to me and I was incredibly disappointed in the ending. While not without some charming moments and interesting concepts, this season did a disservice to the characters that make up the heart of the show. I will gladly rewatch the first and second season. This one I’ll probably skip.

Teenage Bounty Hunters (season 1):

Blair and Sterling Wesley my beloveds! It’s funny and whip smart and held together by the unbreakable bond of two sisters who share one brain cell and the bounty hunter who’s begrudgingly adopted them. Woven throughout is a surprisingly thoughtful commentary about religion, class, and sexuality. We were completely robbed of a second season with this group. Dead Boy Detectives (rewatch):

… Less than three months after I first watched it. That is probably all I need to say here. I still love them.

A Discovery of Witches (seasons 2 & 3):

Really glad I got the chance to finish this one! It’s cozy and gorgeously shot, with scenic locations, period costumes, a muted autumnal aesthetic, and captures the spirit of the novels, if not following them beat for beat. This series is very nostalgic for me, and it was nice to see it wrapped up. Marcus Whitmore you will always be famous.

3 Body Problem (season 1):

After reading the book, I had no idea how would this work as a show. It’s very different, but I was surprised how much I enjoyed it. I don’t know how successful it was as an adaptation, and you definitely get a more western perspective, but it’s visually striking with a compelling story and characters and more restrained than I expected given the creators. I hope they continue in this vein, and am curious to see what happens next.

Moonflower Murders:

Two mysteries threaded into one, and a delightful return to a fantastic cast of characters. This one is a great adaptation of a book I’m very fond of and strikes at the same cozy mystery vibes as Agatha Christie.

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency (season 1):

I really do not know how best to summarize this show but it was weird and charming and, despite having no idea what was going on half the time, I was glad to be along for the ride.

Abbott Elementary (season 3 & 4):

This is a warm, comforting hug in a show form. It’s funny and smart and heartfelt, and has crafted a delightfully chaotic ensemble cast who you can’t help root for. Watch for a good laugh and the feeling of playing heads up seven up in your elementary school classroom during indoor recess.

Only Murders in the Building (season 4):

It is always so nice to be back at the Arconia! This season was especially emotional given the case is about the murder of a very beloved recurring character, but it managed to pull of an exceptional balance of heart, humor, and a compelling mystery. They could make infinite season of this show and I’d always come back it’s so charming.

The Penguin:

This whole show was brilliant and surpassed all my expectations. Matt Reeves’ is my favorite adaptation of Batman, and I love seeing more of this version of Gotham. It’s gritty and bleak and harrowing and gorgeously rendered. No one is truly good, but everyone has more going on than meets the eyes. Had my fully attention start to finish.

Marianne (season 1):

Top notch visuals, from unsettling horror imagery to the gorgeous backdrop of a French coastal city to sleek and fun editing. I will admit it took me a bit to get caught up in the story and characters, but am very glad I tried it out. Definitely an underrated gem for horror fans.

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency (season 2):

This show is a bizarre delight, a great mix of comedy, fantasy/scifi, mystery, and heart. Loved seeing the development of these characters ans continuation of the mythology from season one. Bart has done nothing wrong in her life ever, btw.

Lockwood and Co (rewatch)

I don’t know if I’ll ever be over this one, honestly. The visual language of this show, from the coloring to the staging to all of the neat mirror shots, is evocative and thoughtful. The characters come to life, and every time I rewatch, I pick up something new, especially having now finished the book series. There’s so much care and attention put into everything. Of all my unfairly cancelled shows, this one hurts the most.

The Terror (season 1):

This show was deeply unsettling and brilliantly crafted. I can’t believe how long it took me to watch this! The attention to detail is impressive, and the show as a whole is brutal and unflinching start to finish. For anyone who enjoys wintry isolation horror that acknowledges the real monster is British Imperialism, CANNOT recommend this one enough.

The Jetty (season 1):

This was a very ambitious series, both in the themes it and the complexity of the story (especially for only four episodes!). While I can’t say it fully hit the mark on everything it set out to do, it had some spectacular performances, excellent visuals, and did not shy away from the heavy topics it grapples with. I think this series would have benefited from a bit more time to ruminate, but appreciate the vision behind it.

[ezhiaray]

Babysitter au (hazbin crew and the Vs) I'm going to do Adam and his crew later. Enjoy. Also, if you have any questions about this au, just ask in my mailbox.

Alastor Hudson(Al)- A 6 year old boy who lives with his mother, aunt, and cousin in a 2 bedroom apartment. He is always smiling, is polite, and helps out at home when needed. He enjoys helping his mom out at her small catering business. Lucifer and Adam think he's kinda creepy.

Sylvester Hudson(Husk)- A 7 year old boy who lives with his mother, aunt, and cousin in a 2 bedroom apartment. He is repeating the 1st grade due to grades and behavior troubles. He likes to help his mom out and he gets into fights when people say mean things about his family. Adam thinks he's cool.

Anthony Devito(Angel)- A 6 year old boy who lives in a house with his parents, older brother, and twin sister. His family owns the local Italian restaurant in Eden. He's kinda chubby due to his Mom's cooking and love of food. He's sassy and loves his siblings a lot. Adam's friends with his older brother Erick.

Vagatha Diaz(Vaggie)- A 6 year old girl who lives with her parents and her older step-sister Lute. She is very straightforward and gets mad when people say unkind things. She's Charlie's best friend and frequently comes over to her house to play. Adam is friends with Lute.

Nina Christie(Nifty)- A 6 year old girl who lives with her parents and 2 siblings in a trailer home. She is Alastor's cousin on his father side and their moms are friends. She is very hyper and likes to help out a lot. She has a weird obsession with bugs. Adam finds her creepy too.

Samuel Pentious(Pentious)- A 6 year old boy who lives in a house with his mom and grandfather. He is a new student to Eden Elementary, and recently moved from England (he has an accent). Pentious is very shy and prone to getting hurt due to being clumsy. He loves to build things with Legos.

Victor Telis(Vox)- A 7 year old boy who lives in a mansion with his parents. He comes from a wealthy background on both sides. He is super spoiled and thinks he's better than anyone. Is obsessed with technology and making youtube videos. He wants to be streamer when he is older.

Valentino Hertz(Val)- A 7 year old boy who lives with his parents in a high rise penthouse. His parents are wealthy (dad is a famous director and mom is a model). He is also spoiled, unkind, and manipulative. He wants to be a director like his dad when he is older. (His mom and Sylvester's mom used to be enemies in high school).

Velvet Davis(Velvet)- A 6 year old girl who lives in a house with her parents. Both of her parents are popular models. Her mom is from Australia and frequently goes their for modeling jobs (Hence the accent). She is very spoiled and teases anybody she deems ugly. velvet is also a child model who is making her way on the scene. She wants to be a clothes designer and an influencer when she's older.