#chews her up in my mouth

[fishy-fishyy]

I need to kiss necro!gideon full on the mouth

[eloquentsisyphianturmoil]

Mairon would lick your hand like a puppy dog, nibble your fingers like a puppy dog, and bite your fucking thumb off like a puppy dog.

[abhorsenkatiel]

Thinking about how Nona likes to eat random non-food things, and how it's therefore probably something that Alecto used to do too. Like imagine entering a room and there's this giant spooky bitch sitting in the corner gnawing on a table leg. No wonder the OG Lyctors were afraid of her.

[rosicheeks]

Dog owners and lovers -

Dogsitting my precious Maya baby and she ate something on our walk. Not sure what it was and I’m freaking out? Obviously going to tell the owners when I leave in an hour but not sure how much I should be freaking out? Has your dog eaten stuff on your walks and they were fine?

She seems totally fine so I’m trying to not worry too much. She has an iron stomach… literally she can eat anything. She’s had chocolate before… she’s even had an entire box of treats and was fine. (Not on my watch - one of her owners isn’t the best at putting stuff away and Maya can get into anything)

[justablah56]

you guys can all blame my dear mutuals @babacontainsmultitudes and @serikyl for me talking abt glark again , I'm sure it will happen again <3

ahh ok , so to start by saying those are the two most fucked up guys I've ever seen , so bad for each other , awful , horrid , and so so interesting and devastating to think abt . one thing I bring up a just abt every time I talk about them is I think theyre both only willing to accept "help" from each other . like . both of them just want to feel guilty about what they've done and they don't *want* forgiveness , they want someone who will listen to all their bullshit say yeah you're pretty fucked up , wanna make out ? grant tells lark about the thrill he feels when killing someone or something and that he doesn't *really* want to stop . lark tells grant about how he ended the world and that he's the reason all this fucked up shit is happening . they don't talk about it . they're each other's rant journals . they don't have to write anything down and hope no one finds it , theyre not each other's therapist who will try to help them work it out , they'll just take in all their hatred and lay it out so the other can see . they expose the darkest sides of themselves to each other because they know the other hates themselves just as much as they do . they know that neither of them think they *deserve* to feel better , but at least they can be fucked up together . they're each other's safe place , in a way . they both see enough of themselves in each other that they can hate each other a bit , but also still see enough of the other to care . they both know this . one of em says well I'm fucked up and the other says yeah then what does that make me and they don't respond and fall asleep next to each other on a couch . they help each other in the sense that they feel safe knowing that the other won't try to help . because at least they're telling *someone* . at least there's *someone* who will agree and say wow you're fucked up and that can be the end of the conversation . they hurt each other and take out at least some of the anger they have towards themselves and hurl it at the other . and they take it . they both know what they're doing . they know they don't *really* mean all the hate they say to each other . but it's enough that maybe then they can justify hating themselves . or maybe , just maybe , it's enough that they can't . maybe they'll hear the words coming out of their mouths and realize huh that doesn't really make much sense . but they don't . they'll continue to hate each other out of love , but the moment they realize that's what it is it'll stop . so they just won't think about what they have . they'll just remain each other's journals and keep each other's secrets about the pain they wish they had and if anything resembling actual care or softness or gentleness they're quick to stop it before they begin to *need* it . because if someone who knows every fucked up thing about them and decided to stay out of *love* they'd have to accept that maybe they're still able to be saved . but they don't want that .

[crobby]

my mom needs to stop pushing me away because i’m this close to not coming back

[alsaurus-loves-dean]

.

[nspolaris]

read the sunshine court and have never been more impatient in needing a second book my god

[mysticarcanum]

auuuugh there is only skulduggery pleasant in my brain right now.

[luminarai]

I had a filling replaced Monday and my tooth is still sensitive rip in pieces 🥲

[urmomsfavelesbian]

new boy daya story!!!!

hi why is this SO fucking hot

[devotedlystrangewizard]

i think the concepts of blorbo & favorite character are separate but maybe thats just me

[skrunksthatwunk]

world's thinnest walls versus parents' stupidest argument

[today-i-am-thinking-about]

the shrill plaintive cries of a cat who thinks its time for food

[evolutionsbedingt]

The obsession some people have with being healthy and whole despite multiple signs to the contrary and which then leads to them rejecting treatment that would help them is absolutely baffling when you've never had that privilege

[chuluoyi]

✎ baby to the rescue

- gojo satoru x reader

in which gojo recruits your baby son to “save” you from a credit card salesman

genre: immense fluff !! baby gojo and dad!gojo shenanigans~

note: based on this and this reel. with this i hereby declare that anything past chapter 235 is null and void HAHA anyway, i truly want to post remarried empress au by this week but since 261 leaks hurt me so much, i need more fluff so have to postpone it to next week :') tagging @karikari19hikariiii <3

a part of gojo's love entries

general masterlist

Your husband Gojo Satoru... is handsome as hell, which means your baby son is also undeniably good-looking.

"Why do you pout at me?" Satoru poked his squirming baby's cheek while pursing his lips too. "C'mon, smile! That auntie is smiling at you!"

Everyone who passed by them in Shinjuku shopping district turned heads to admire him and his pumpkin just a little longer, and Satoru visibly enjoyed the attention. He smiled back at them, occasionally winking even.

If only they knew how pretty his wife was too...

Wait, no! On second thought, if they know how hot you are, there will be problems!

You had left him to go to the nearest pharmacy to restock some things, while Satoru decided to entertain his baby in the toy section. He basked in the starry-eyed looks people were giving him... until he heard some strange sounds and turned to his baby boy—

—who was chewing the beak of a duck toy with all his might. Satoru was mortified.

"—! Let that go! Your mama will beat me if she sees you eating this!"

Your baby paid him no mind though, desperately pushing the duck into his mouth. Satoru sat him on one of the empty racks and began the tug of war—

"Let go!" he reprimanded. "You're so naughty, gods—!"

Some people were now openly giggling at both of them. His son tried to resist by rolling, and Satoru clicked his tongue. He then yanked the toy away until his baby finally let it go, sniffling sadly that his papa wouldn't let him have the duck.

"Oh, you..." he picked him up again and consoled the pumpkin. "You can't do that, you hear? First, it's not clean. Second, mama will grow two heads to chew you and me both, understand?"

No, your son totally didn't understand a thing. Satoru sighed, seeing his little blue eyes welling up with tears. He ruffled his head and pulled him close. "There, there... I'll get you ice cream, okay? Now let's go."

Satoru was determined to turn his son back into a smiling, happy baby. But just as he was about to head towards the ice cream parlor, he encountered the most unbelievable sight—

"Miss! I guarantee you'll love this credit card features!"

You. That was clearly you, and a salesman (or a bozo, in Satoru's eyes) was trying to bother you.

You raised an eyebrow. "Uh, no— thank you—"

Yet the bozo was still persistent, like the pesky fly he was. "You can use it to pay for your monthly beauty treatments! Someone as pretty as you..." He eyed you from head to toe, blinking suggestively. "Oh my! Your skin is flawless! You have to maintain it this way! I can also give you recommendations for—"

You were wearing a flare dress that made you look so young and petite, and obviously, Satoru too was lusting after you. And true, your skin was smooth like a soft serve of mochi, but still!

You are meant for him and his eyes only! Oho, this bozo would get heavenly punishment.

He had to get to you somehow, but this was public space and if he cooked up some sort of shenanigan, you would put him in sex ban. I can't have that! so Satoru wracked his brain to think of another way...

Once again, his gaze fell on his now calm baby, who was also looking at his mama over there with utter curiosity. And an idea immediately popped up in his mind.

"Hey, kiddo, look at that, a bad man is trying to take your mama," Satoru nudged him as if trying to egg him on. "We can't let that happen. Will you help me to save her, hmm?"

"Mama..." your baby looked back at him so innocently before smiling. "Mamaaa!"

"Good boy." Gods, his baby was so adorable, he almost felt bad for doing this but...

Swallowing his guilt, thinking he would make it up later, he pinched his son's butt a little too firmly—

"WAAAA!" and suddenly, the little boy burst into tears, and even Satoru was surprised by the sheer volume of his wail.

The sudden inconsolable sound of your baby sent you scrambling in panic, your eyes wildly searching for him, completely disregarding the credit card man. "My baby!"

"Eh?" the credit card man was visibly surprised. "Oh... so, you're married...?"

You immediately made your way towards Satoru and snatched your baby from him, hugging him tightly. "Oh, there, there... What happened to you?" you shot your husband a distaste look as your son kept wailing. "Satoru, why is he crying?"

He nonchalantly shrugged. "Maybe missing his mama? Dunno~"

By now, you had completely forgotten the credit card bozo, but he still looked at the three of you in mild surprise. Satoru took this chance to approach him and whisper in his ear:

"You see, my wife doesn't need your credit card," he whistled. "My cards or lumpsum money will do more than enough."

After seeing how pale the bozo looked, Satoru chuckled darkly... before leading you and your son away from the crowd, with one arm possessively around your waist.

Epilogue

"I'm sorry— I'm sorry, okay!?"

Satoru looked down at his son in utter hopelessness, as the little boy refused to be held by him, looking at him with teary, resentful eyes, and backing away from him in his playpen.

Can babies hold a grudge? Satoru didn't know, but his son definitely was not happy with him, and he couldn't think of any other explanation other than his sin against him back this afternoon.

"I've bought you mochi ice cream!" he opened his palm to reveal the treat. "Don't you want some? Papa will give you some, yeah?"

Baby looked skeptical now, and at that moment, he resembled you so much—accusing eyes, pursed lips, exactly like the expression you would pull when you were unsure of what Satoru might do next. He almost chuckled at the resemblance, feeling giddy.

"C'mon, forgive me, yeah?" he patted his son's little beanie and offered his hand for him to take, eyes crinkling in fondness. "Now, here comes your treat, come closer?"

Your baby crawled closer, seemingly accepting him, and Satoru was all smiles, until—

Whack!

It happened in a flash. He could have avoided it, but he was too taken aback. The pain exploded in his jaw, so intense that he grunted loudly.

"What the—?! You... you—! You kicked me— in the face!"