#character b should love character a’s stupid ass bad ass dancing!

[cronusisnowhere]

I lowkey hate the whole “may I have this dance” “I don’t know how..” “let me teach you <3” scene b/c somehow they just magically do fucking amazing??????

I need that person to **suck** at dancing, so that they have start over from the beginning and continuously apologize. Then they can just laugh and giggle and all that. Like why can’t romance be silly??????

[threepandas]

Bad End: Chosen

I used to love Otome games.

Used to love the genre, predictable as it could sometimes be. It was bright. Fun. A colorful bit of escapism built on love and power fantasies. I read the books. Watched the animes. Engaged with the fandoms freely and with an enthusiasm I can barely remember now.

It was a lifetime ago.

Before I... before, like a monkey's paw wish, I got granted every OI fan's DREAM. I somehow, someway, died and was reborn. A genuine isekai all of my own. I laugh now... I really do... I was so fucking EXCITED.

I was a FOOL.

The world is not a story. PEOPLE are not characters. You can not push the "right" social imput buttons and have a happy ending pop out. Time moves as it always has and always will. Day by day. And? Just because you are HERE? Does not mean you are SPECIAL.

I was old enough to know that, thank the Gods. Or I would have made a likely terrible mistake. Probably a fatal one, by now.

How, you may ask? Surely if you are reborn, you are special! Important to the "plot"! HA. Ah yes, the all forsaken PLOT. That damnable thing, chaining out fates and making us dance, like toys, for the Gods amusement. No, I was merely a replacement part for one worn out and broken down. A soul that gave up.

This dance repeats, you know.

They aren't done with us yet. Not bored of us, all the twists and turns we might take. She could not keep fighting. Keep raging. And so she was replaced. Now I live... a changeling in her place. Knowing my role yet careful to defy it. But... oh...

Oh, how almost IMPOSSIBLE it is to defy it.

I am supposed to HATE her. The Protagonist. The Chosen One. Saintess and beloved. The God's special little thing. Showered in adoration and silks, pampering and protection. While we all DIE. In this, their STUPID fucking Holy War, that we CAN NOT WIN, against "The Dark".

How HELPFUL, my liege. How incredibly SPECIFIC. Is "The Dark" the demons that tore apart my squadron a fortnight ago or the undead that rose and devored an entire village of terrified innocents? How do we STOP them? END this infinite string of atrocities?

Oh? "Only the SAINTESS can push back The Dark"? Well then! It's a good thing she safely tucked away in the CAPITAL THEN, isn't it!? Far from the front lines where we NEED her! Thank the GODS she's getting her chance to play "fuck, fuck, marry!" with the nation's finest while we all DIE!

I remind myself again, desperately, I am not allowed to hate her.

If I hate her, I become an antagonist in this little play. Doomed to die a gruesome and needless death. My men need me. The people need me. The live and breathe and fear for their lives. At the mercy of cruel God's who do not care.

I almost... It is enough that I almost wish my Master was here. But no, HE stayed back at the Magic Tower. Lost interest in me the second the merest HINT that his beloved pet prophecy might be about to be fulfilled. I was his student for most of my life. Chased up and down that mind-bending hellhole for years, giving my everything to meet his every standard.

Does he even remember my name?

Ha ha... gods, as I stare down at the battle map, one of so SO many... I feel brittle. How long will we fight? How many of my men must DIE, before that God coddled BITCH gets off her ass and comes to do her JOB?! We've lost Redwell. Lakehill is covered in ghouls. And no one we sent near the forests of Mirth ever reports back.

But at least the crown prince is getting his fucking birthday party while his people starve. While they run for their lives. Cower from demons and the damned. Because his Twue Woooove~ can't be allowed to put her dainty little self in DANGER now CAN she?!

I'm seething. Furious. Nails digging into the wood on the table before me. I know I should be planning... but I just... gods, I just so ANGRY. So tired. How long can this continue? Am I going to die here, just so those fuckers can DRAMATICALLY "save the day" at the last second? As though they had not let thousands die? Only for it all to begin again? What am I supposed to d-?

Like a roll of thunder and an earthquake combined, the non-physical world SHAKES.

Weight. POWER. Like a mountain appearing from no where, to drop down upon us all. It is CRUSHING. And every bit as dark as being buried beneath tons on soil and stone. My legs nearly give out. My grip on the table before me the only thing keeping me up and alarm bells start clanging outside my tent.

This is it.

I don't know what's about to happen, but I can FEEL it. I... I can not possibly hope to win. It's over. I know, in my heart, I will go out there and fight. Die. Because I refuse to die cowering. Because maybe it'll make a difference for my friends, for the others, for those that yet live. Every monster I slay is one less they fight.

But... this is it.

It's over.

I wish I felt braver. Glorious and filled with light. A beacon of hope, perhaps. But all I can offer is fear and anger and SPITE. Locking my knees so I can stand. Blinking away the tears so I can grit my teeth and bare them. Grabbing my staff so can go a die with the others. Today I shall burn the world. I promised myself.

Take them with you.

Take every last one of those fuckers WITH YOU.

The battle is ugly. It always is and always will be. I heal where I can but kill faster the most can blink. Waves of fire. Blood turned to ice turn to shrapnel bombs turned to flying storms of blood ice shards. Wind attacks and void pockets. Puppets made of mud and rock and bits of armor. The blood of the fallen only making it all that much stronger, that much more terrible.

Magic in war hold no beauty.

I wish I never had to see it again.

"Grandlearner, you've been practicing." A rich voice observed from behind me, sounding pleased. "Good~"

Between one instance and the next, the crushing ocean of power moves between the far side of the battle field to right behind me. I move, spin. Fire my strongest short-range piercing in the desperate hope to gut the man now far too close. I... am effortlessly countered.

He didn't even have to move his hands.

There, standing in the heart of an open battle field, is a man in impeccable fomal clothes. Spotless, dispite the ash and dust, the blood and gore. Almost inhuman in his otherness, compared to the death and suffering surrounding him. He looks like a proper well-to-do gentleman ready for a stroll. The sort of ambiguously ageless bachelor that had haunted the royal university's halls every time I was sent there, to collect something for the Tower.

Too old to be some boyish flirt, too young to be a rougish mistake. It feels false. Mocking. Like a mask held up by some grinning beast. Something older then it seems, effortlessly blending in with the Power of the current age, all the better to play them like fools.

Then the words register and my blood runs cold.

"Learner". It's what a Master calls their personal magical students at the Tower. There are lineage, of a sort. Like bloodlines, almost. Since most never leave. A way to pass on your teachings. Your name and traditions. It's not like we often have the chance to have biological kids. Too busy with our studies. So it's considered effectively the same.

My Master's Master. Who was said to be one of, if not THE, greatest Mages of the last thousand years, possibly longer. Said to have simply vanished one day. Rumored to have "lost his mind" and left the Tower for places unknown after some great argument. Foremost expert on The Dark.

Now standing h...here. Right... Right here. With the enemy army. Of dark and terrible things. The very abominations he once studied "academically". Oh gods. It doesn't take much to put two and two together.

"I've come to collect you, my dear." He says, the very picture of charm as my men scream and suffer around him. As they fight for their lives against his monstrosities. As... as they LOSE. "It has come to my attention, that my unfortunate disappointment of a student has been neglecting his duties to you."

He sweeps his hat gallantly from his head, holding it against his heart at just the right angle, as though offering to merely take me for a stroll. Picture perfect etiquette. As though this were high society and not a warzone. The disconnect stuns me for long moments. "Collect" me?

He strolls forward. Expensive shoe leather somehow unstained by the terrible muck of the battlefield. The blood and mud, the spell water and ash. Amusement rolling off every line of his form, as I try to keep the distance between us. As I struggle against the sucking filth to keep my feet under me.

"I would like to say I am surprised... but honestly? I am not. He always WAS easily distracted by shiny trinkets of little worth. The shinier the better. Like an empty headed little magpie. Disgusting really, how little he values loyalty. I DID try to instill some values. Hard work. Good, honest, study. Some modicum of rationality..."

"It did not work." He sighs, stepping over the fallen body of my Cordelia, my reserve healer. Gods, please no, I told her to RUN... "Unlike myself of course. I, my dear, know EXACTLY what your worth. How you have been WASTED on that little ingrate. It truely has been a theme with him, hasn't it?"

"Tossing aside anything who doesn't fit his perfect little vision. His Master, his Learner, nothing is sacred to him. All he shall ever care for is his little divine tart, won't he?"

The grin that spills across his mouth is like poison through veins, it terrifies me. His face is arranged in a mask of pleasantry. But the look in his eye... that look was coldly covetous. The sort of hunger that would sooner kill than release its hold. It wasn't lustful, I was a child too him. An infant. But I was, perhaps, all that remained. The last piece of his lineage he could possibly still steal away. Corrupt.

I refused.

It... it did not matter much, in the end.

Every spell, he counters. Every attack, he matchs with effortless neutralization. The well of his magic is like the sea. Deep, dark, and crushing. I rage against it, even knowing I stand no chance. I... I have to TRY. I can do no less. Even as I slowly collapse.

Water and ice, electricity and transformation, wind and fire. I try to EXPLODE HIS ORGANS for the Gods sake. In the end, with nothing left, the well of my magic nearly bone dry... I swing at him. Put my back in to it. A staff is a staff after all. It even has a pretty hefty rock in it. It'd probably take out a few teeth.

He, of course, catches it.

Bastard.

He looks CHARMED. Utterly delighted. As though my defiance and struggle are some cute little game. The tantrum of an adorable child that does not wish to submit to their nap. The world swayed as my body begs me to just pass out. To escape within myself. Recover. My legs can no longer hold me. I glare. At last, long last, I let myself HATE.

If that BITCH had just DONE HER JOB. I would not be here, at the mercy of a mad man. While she frolics about, in her happy little tale of love and misunderstandings? I have suffered. People have died! The world has fallen to slow and crumbling RUIN.

Gloved hands cupped my cheeks.

"That's it, little one~ My precious child. Get angry. RAGE for me. Let Master see your fire~" thumbs stroked my cheeks. Looming and entirely too close. There is a glee in that eye, a madness. "We are going to set this world FREE. You? Oh dearest you are utterly PERFECT. Master will take care of everything, understand? All you have to do?"

"Is give in."

Next -->

[gojuo]

Tell us now your top 5 most hated characters on ASOAIF and F&B please!

My no.1 most hated ASOIAF character is Tywin Lannister. I hate this man. I hate him very much. I wish he would go away and die somewhere where he will inconvenience no one but the vultures. I loathe his manner. I loathe his style. I loathe the fact that he dares draw breath in a world where my loved ones do not or rather cannot because he murdered them. I loathe that he was rewarded for behavior which, in-universe, he should have been quartered for. I want him dead. I want to kill him and destroy him. I want him died. #SCENE #ANGER #FUCK #DIE #HATERED

There is not a single ounce — not even a miniscule amount ­— of sympathy I have for this scumbag. Not a single thing likeable about him. Not a single redeeming quality he has to his name. From the first moment he showed up on page until the very last mention of him, he was nothing short of disgusting. He is diabolical, satanic, monstrous, loathsome, ghoulish, sadistic, cruel, insert every single synonym of the term demonic here, etc. etc. I hate him. I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him.

The whole “Yeah he’s evil uwu but Charles Dance is so granddaddy I can fix him <3" sales pitch this low IQ fandom has been pushing since the dawn of that accursed adaptation on top of it all only makes the intense disgust I hold for him so much fucking worse. Tywin Lannister has no conscience, no charisma, no morals, and he has no honor — all of that in an un-sexy way, one of the greatest crimes a villain with no traumatic backstory could objectively ever commit. Never mind the beyond immoral execution of the Red Wedding (“Machiavellian” my ass. Any stupid fool who says this crap needs to go back to elementary school in order to relearn how to read and how to interpret literature and themes in literature right the fuck now), never mind the severe mental torture he’s put his own flesh and blood through to the point where two of them are in a destructive incestuous relationship with each other and the other pushed to the point of patricide, this monster had his son's fourteen-year-old little child-wife gangraped by his guards, had each of them give her a silver coin after one was done with her, then had thirteen-year-old Tyrion rape her last and, contrary to the others, give her a gold coin because “Lannisters are worth more”. All because she was a common-born little girl who dared to marry the disabled son he hated so much. Am I supposed to think this piece of shit falls under the sexy evil category of villains? What sad backstory does this trash have to his name that would woobify him enough to “if villain bad why sexy” him? His father had a few mistresses after his mother died and gave them gifts and cared for them? Was that the tragic past of his that elevated him enough for people to wash their conscience clean so to cross moral boundaries all to lust after this so-called “sexy villain”? Tywin Lannister had his father’s mistress, who was nothing but a poor common-born daughter of a candle-maker, stripped naked and paraded through the streets of Lannisport for two whole goddamn weeks, and forced her to tell every man she came across that she was a thief and a whore, quite alike to what he did to Tysha as well. This man hates women. I cannot stress this enough, like Tywin Lannister hates women. And not just women, but especially commoner women. His modus operandi is inflicting sadistic sexual violence on any and all women he doesn’t like (which is like, all of them). As a true “if villain bad then why sexy” connoisseur and quite frankly, the president of the club, this man is not, never was and never will be a part of that esteemed category of villains.

And you know something that’s a veeery personal ick of mine — and this is really the icing on the cake for me — is shit-for-brains dickriders of this ghoul having the gall to pretend like he did not explicitly order the murder of Elia and her babies, that he apparently just “let” Clegane and Lorch loose on them. These low IQ fucks know what that demon did to his father’s poor mistress and what he did to little Tysha, and then somehow they still think this sadist with a severely fragile ego did not tell Clegane and Lorch to do what they did to her with his own mouth? Any waste-of-space who parrots this BNF-drivel (all said in order to minimize what happened to Elia, Rhaenys and the baby in place for Aegon) is not only going on my blocklist like immediately, they also need to die. Respectfully.

Now, I mostly spoke on his character from a moral standpoint, but I want to make clear that this loser’s shortcomings aren’t only morality-based. All the shit-for-brains stans this demon has know he has no morals so they always deflect to the “b-b-but he’s a military genius, that’s why I like him, I’m so edgy!!!” excuse and I want to emphasize how fucking stupid you have to be to believe Tywin is anything but brainless. AFFC is literally right there. GRRM’s explicitly spells out to the reader through Jaime’s POV how fucking stupid Tywin was in everything that he did. How the only show of military genius this demon had was through being nothing but a bully. All his work unraveled the second he died. He built nothing, and he will go down in history as nothing. That’s why his one and only legacy will always be that he got murdered on the shitter by his own son, like the fucking loser that he is.

I hate this fucking character with every fiber of my being.

On number 2 stands Aerys II Targeryen. Do I even need to explain this? What I said about Tywin applies to this racist, rapist, fascist piece of shit as well. I’m not going to waste my time and money psychoanalyzing this bottom-of-the-barrel trash. Aerys is the pinnacular culmination of three hundred years of Targaryen delusion, self-worship, egotism and five thousand years of Valyrian hubris, god-complex, and megalomania. Him and his daughter both, but I’ll get to her in a minute. This man’s lucky he’s only got 2 stans — and those two are only stanning just to be contrarians — unlike Tywin, who’s got an actual dedicated fanbase. Ugh. Two peas in a pod. One edge he has over Tywin is that at the very least Aerys has some sort of tragic backstory that’s actually valid. Too bad for him idgaf. Pour one out for Rhaella :(

My third most hated is ... Daenerys. Man… How do I even open this can of worms… I’ve a whole tag dedicated to hating her, soooo awkwardly waves hand in that direction. Everything about Daenerys is just so … racist. Racist on an in-universe level, racist on a meta level and racist on a fandom level, so I was never going to like Daenerys no matter what. The fact that she has the most insane and delusional and downright disgusting fanbase ever in all of media history really doesn’t help her case. If they hadn’t been this rabid and racist, then I don’t think I would have hated her this much. Because then I could’ve just had her character be as she is: the Paul Astreides of the series. A false Messiah, basically. The meta-level racism (GRRM making every single antagonist in her plotline nothing but walking, talking Reel Bad Arabs tropes; the use of POV trap which leads to none of the brown and black supporting characters in her story having a voice; GRRM’s own racism as in exotic-erotic tropes for all of the Essosi people, really badly researched POC cultures he based the Essosi off of, using brown and black people as nothing but props for the main white girl) and Daenerys’ in-universe racism (conquering and colonizing lands and peoples; white saviorism; imperialism; her hypocritical use of slavery) would still be there, of course, and I still would not have been able to stomach it meaning I still would not have rooted for her in any way, but then at the very least I would not have been subjected to a long decade of fandom racism being justified through the excuse of her freeing slaves from evil Reel Bad Arabs (spoiler alert: she is not freeing anybody).

Ugh, I don’t wanna talk about her. Everything about her from her character to the plot and storyline and her place in the narrative is downright insulting to me as a WOC, and quite frankly, any WOC that lays down their lives to defend this girl baffles me. Like, stop it. Please have some self-respect.

Then comes Jaehaerys the Old King. Father and inventor of misogyny. It’s crazy.

No. 5 is Rhaenys I and Daeron I the Young Dragon. EVERY TONGUE THAT RISES AGAINST THE DORNISH SHALL FALL!!!

[lesvegas]

ritchie’s🎃💀 ABCs of Horror Movie Marathon!! 💀🎃

Horror movie challenge prompted by @quintsmachete

Day Two - B is for Blood Dolls (1999)

I was going to watch Black Christmas (1974) for the B movie of the challenge, but after a long day a classic slasher was the last thing I wanted to see. Fortunately, my friend @quintsmachete suggested their B pick for the month, and it seemed like a light, kinda mediocre but fun pick that would help me unwind. I hadn't heard of it before but I was told it'd be kinda bad and campy.

The flecks of camp, comically excessive blood, stop-motion animated dolls, okay music, occasionally fun/funny costuming and make-up were not enough to save this movie for me. Each individual piece feels like something I'd love, but even on their own they tend to fall flat, and come together in a late 90's flop that didn't even achieve the status of cult classic. It also pretends to be self-aware of how racist it is but all that really does is emphasize that they were well aware of the racism. The gratuitous femdom was especially cringe.

Actually I'm gonna talk about the femdom for a second because it was a solid fucking portion of the movie and I am not joking. Within the first 45 minutes there were three femdom scenes and by the third one I was so annoyed that I got up to take a shit and missed about 30 minutes of the remainder of the movie and I have no regrets about that. If I somehow missed something good I would think one of the three people I was watching it with would have mentioned it when I came back from the bathroom. I was told that we were in the middle of one of the multiple endings and I couldn't be bothered to ask about the other endings. Anyway, each femdom scene felt more cringe than the last and it quickly went from 'the writer's barely disguised fetish' to 'really bad softcore porn'. Apparently there was a fourth one I missed. I don't really care.

I should be clear, I don't think femdom in general is cringe. I also don't use the term 'cringe' lightly. I think femdom is pretty awesome in general, actually. Do you have any idea how bad femdom has to be for me to find it cringe? Really, really bad. I think 92% of the problem was the male actor, he was supposed to be like... stupid and annoying? I guess? Which was supposed to make him getting whipped and whatnot funny? But it just made the whole movie feel stupid and annoying. Like Jesus fucking Christ he was so annoying I didn't even find it funny when he died. If you're thinking about watching this movie just for the femdom scenes let me spare you: they suck, the movie sucks, and none of it is worth your time even if your standards are underground.

Anyway. The one positive is that the movie wasn't boring. It sucked ass, but it wasn't boring. But I still felt like the fantasy football ads interrupting the movie every 10 minutes were more engaging. Also the Woker was the only okay character.

I'm gonna give it one dancing woman ("the most femdom emoji" -@ed-e) out of five 💃🗌🗌🗌🗌

[absolutepokemontrash]

The Brothers and Side Characters Go on a Road Trip!

So, Diavolo, Lord of the Devildom, wants to go on a road trip for reasons unknown. You know what? Screw it, the reason is because Dia wants to do a fun human thing because MC brought it up during tea time. No one can defy the king, so TIME FOR A ROAD TRIP!

Shut Up! HE DOESN’T NEED DIRECTIONS! (Lucifer)

He was going to turn that car around. That’s it, he was going to leave. Someone else drive.

I hope your MC likes staticky traffic updates because that’s what Lucifer constantly had on the radio.

Obviously, some of the brothers complained, so Lucifer put on Beethoven’s Symphony no. 9. HELL YEAH TURN IT UP DJ!

Lol JK no one can car-dance to classical music. Just go back to the staticky traffic updates…

Lucifer would have preferred it if MC or Barbatos were riding shotgun next to him, but Diavolo ended up getting it. Dia is constantly asking Lucifer to stop so he can take pictures of the most mundane shit.

Lucifer stopped stopping after the first fifteen requests.

“I’m not stopping at McDonalds- hang on. Hi McDonald’s employee, one black coffee please.”

In true father fashion, Lucifer got lost and REFUSED to ask for directions. They were lost for five hours before Diavolo finally asked:

“Lucifer, you can turn on the GPS right?”

“Yes, but I don’t trust it.”

Everyone screamed in frustration and were all fully prepared to abandon Lucifer at the side of the road.

Please… can someone else drive? Anyone else…

Are We There Yeeeet..? (Mammon)

Okay, so, Mammon was one of two ways on that road trip. One: complete ADHD daydream zoned out. Or type Two: AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRREEEEE WEEEEEEEE THEEEEEEEEERRRRRREEEE YEEEEEEET???!

He wanted to stop and go to all the tourist traps, by the end of the road trip Mammon wanted to open his own.

The Avatar of Greed loves driving, problem is, he’s used to driving off into the sunset as a lone bachelor, not with his friends and brothers in the car as well.

He only got to drive once, and it was awful. 0/10 would not recommend. Luke thought MC was driving and called shotgun…

Mammon just turns on the radio for music and hopes something good is on at least ONE channel.

STOP WEAVING BETWEEN LANES YOU MORON-

Not all of Mammon’s time driving was bad, the combined powers of Luke and Mammon meant that everyone stopped at a petting zoo at the side of the road. Everyone had a good time, even though when they got back into the car they all smelled like a farm.

Did anyone else hear that oinking in the car-

*Vibes to Music in the Backseat* (Levi)

After being cruelly dragged from his room and placed in this stupid van… he just climbed into the backseat and put on his headphones.

Maybe anime openings could drown out this problem…

Levi only drove for fifteen minutes, it was the most terrifying fifteen minutes of everyone’s lives.

Mario Kart is not a substitute for proper driving school!

Listen- Levi actually saved the entire trip, after stopping at a gas station everyone noticed that Levi never complained about what was on the radio because he was wearing headphones, so everyone bought their own pair and the car trip was so much more pleasant…

No matter how many times Lucifer told Levi to get his feet off the seat, he wouldn’t listen, he was GAMING and they took him away from his gaming chair! HE NEEDED TO SCRUNCH HIMSELF UP LIKE A GOBLIN TO FOCUS DAMMIT!

Whenever the car would stop so everyone could get out and take a picture or look at something, Levi had to be practically dragged out of the car and manually posed for the pictures.

“Is this one of those vans with TVs in them? I brought the first five volumes of TSL on DVD!”

While Satan was driving they stopped at a lake, and Levi burst out of the car and made friends with all the lake fish.

He was still soaking wet when they had to leave.

I’m a Responsible Driver- IS THAT AN OLD BOOKSTORE?! (Satan)

Satan, we believed in you…

Our favourite nerd wanted to stop at any and all historical spots or cool looking bookstores he saw.

When everyone went to buy headphones, he got a pair with cat-ears on them! Because obviously!

Satan’s a responsible driver, and he’s not as prone to road rage as one might think. He has patience, remember in the Jobs event when he worked in customer service? Those kinds of jobs take a godlike amount of self control to do.

Asmo called shotgun and Satan got to have the wonderful experience of having his ear chatted off by his dear brother.

Satan was not about to have fast food for the eighth time in four days, if everyone wanted food, he’d stop at a restaurant.

He was terribly sorry to anyone who needed to use the restroom, but they should have gone at the last rest stop.

When Satan stopped at the lake, he gave everyone a long lecture on the historical significance of the place, then noticed that Levi was being crowned king of the lake and decided he should cut his history lesson short before Levi abandoned his family to chill with the fish forever.

I wanted Satan to be the normal chill one with the radio… I really did… but deep in my subconscious I feel like Satan would put on one of those language learning DVDs so he can learn another language on the go like a total dork.

Road Rage (Asmodeus)

No one saw this coming but- Asmo gets some B A D road rage. Someone cuts him off? “Hi hello dear, WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO SHOVE MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS?!” Someone doesn’t use a turn signal? “YOU BRAIN DEAD MORON! LEARN TO DRIVE!” Someone just pisses him off? “*prolonged horn sound*”

It’s just… the car trip was so taxing on the poor Avatar of Lust… he was crammed into the middle seat for the majority of the trip… he had to give his sleeping mask to Belphie… Beel was getting crumbs all over him and he couldn’t move over… just so tragic…

Solomon called shotgun and it was the greatest couple of hours of his life. He got a front row seat to Lucifer and Barbatos dragging Asmo back into the car because he tried to pick a fight with another driver.

Asmo wasn’t having a good time…

He didn’t want to stop for any gas station food or go through a drive-thru so it was another expensive restaurant trip. Rest In Peace to the gang’s wallets.

When he wasn’t driving, Asmo was loudly talking with MC or talking on the phone. It was a blessing in disguise when they went through an area with bad phone reception and Asmo finally had to shut up.

Oh well… at least he got a few nice pictures for Devilgram.

MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! (Beel)

We all know Beel is massive, right? His head is touching the ceiling and every speed-bump hurt.

He’s the one begging to stop at every gas station or fast food place they pass by.

Beel’s section in the car was covered in empty bags of Doritos by the end of the trip.

When Beel got to drive, Belphie got shotgun! Hell yeah dream team!

Poor Beel, he got distracted and ended up somehow popping a tire. He pulled over next to a farm, changed the tire, then got back in the car and kept driving.

Uh… there was an awful lack of snoring next to Beel- OH FUCK THEY LEFT BELPHIE!

Belphie was found sleeping next to the cows on the farm they had stopped at earlier.

The cows didn’t want to give their sleepy god up so easily…

After that… Beel didn’t want to drive anymore…

“Look, cows.” (Belphie)

I really need to stop with the cow jokes but I CAN’T

*snore*

Belphie’s crammed between Beel and MC for most of the trip and is probably drooling all over poor MC’s lap or shoulder.

Beware, he jolts up randomly and looks around in a panic before he realizes he’s in a car. This happens every three hours.

Belphie’s not allowed to drive, he’d fall asleep. But when Lucifer takes the wheel and puts on that fucking staticky radio, Belphie forms an idea.

“*ahem* four thousand bottles of beer on the wall, four thousand bottles of beer,”

Mission success, Lucifer wanted to tear his hair out.

Belphie ended up asking to stop when they get to a stretch of road with no streetlights, everyone got out of the and stared at the stars.

…listen, it’s a miracle no one got axe murdered but the stars were gorgeous.

Remember when I said Satan put on those language learning DVDs? Yeah uh…. Belphie woke up from his last nap of the trip almost fully fluent in Spanish. At least one person gained a new skill on this trip…

Oooo, Look at Thaaaaat! (Diavolo)

Even though the side characters were in a different car most of the time, sometimes people would switch to the other car if they met up at a gas station.

By the end of the road trip Dia looked like one of those tourist dads, Hawaiian shirt and all.

Dia can’t drive

He’s absorbing human culture… and human culture involves ordering everything at this random Wendy’s.

Diavolo’s camera roll is so unbelievably full by the end of the trip and he refuses to delete ANY of the pictures.

Most of the pictures are of really weird and boring stuff, like traffic signs and trees, but the picture he ends up printing out and putting in a picture frame is a picture of the whole group at the petting zoo having a grand old time.

He wanted to take home a baby goat but Barbatos said that wasn’t a good idea :(

Help. (Barbatos)

So, it could have been worse for Barbatos, he could have been stuck in the car with the brothers and MC.

Dia always had the seat up front, but when he left the car to go hang out with the dude-squad, Solomon got the passenger seat.

Solomon decided it would be a good idea to pester Barbatos to go faster and take weird shortcuts through (probably not legal) backroads and creepy forest paths.

Good thing Barbatos, Luke, and Simeon had functioning brain cells and knew that’s how horror movies began.

Barbatos stopped for fast food once and only once. It’s not healthy!

He’s the only driver to take suggestions for music, meaning that the side characters’ car was the best one of the two.

“SOMEONE GET THE BARF BAG!”(Simeon)

He’s just… he’s just trying his best not to vomit…

Simeon thought the car would be a good place to get some writing done while they drove down long stretches of road. Simeon was wrong in that assumption.

With his head down way too much while the car zoomed down the highway, Simeon felt himself getting *very* sick about four hours in.

He was worried he may have accidentally eaten something of Solomon’s… but nope. The angel was carsick.

Luke had the important job of patting Simeon on the back as he leaned over the barf-bag while Solomon dry heaved up front.

Hurry and open the windows before Solomon barfs too!!!!

Other than the car sickness, he had the job of making sure Luke was entertained, there was a good hour of eye-spy until they just got to a stretch of forest.

After that, Simeon realized that he could just give Luke free permission to ramble about whatever he wanted and that would keep the little guy entertained for HOURS.

What do You Mean I Can’t Legally Make This Turn?! (Solomon)

Shifty bastard can drive, problem is, he doesn’t care about the laws of the road.

He ended up getting pulled over after breaking approximately 11 traffic laws in less than ten minutes.

“License and registration.” “Yeah yeah yeah…” “…sir, this license expired in 1989.” “…shit.”

Solomon gunned it and managed to use his magic to hide the car and evade the very confused traffic cop.

Luke was completely aghast at the flagrant law breaking, but Solomon’s excuse was that the 80s were a lawless wasteland and he completely forgot he legally had to update his license.

He’s an equally obnoxious passenger as he is driver, but at least no one in the car is bored.

“You know, back in the day cars didn’t have seatbelts.” “Solomon put your seatbelt back on.”

…Can we keep it? (Luke)

He was against this from the start. A road trip? With those nasty demons? No! Never!

Okay fine… maybe he wanted to see some more of the human world… he agreed to go.

After helping Simeon through his car sickness, he misheard the other car say that MC would be driving, and Luke wanted to hang out with his third parent 🥺

That’s how he ended up riding shotgun next to Mammon. It started out rough, but when the two spotted the petting zoo it was all sunshine and rainbows.

Luke made friends with all the animals! He was like a little Disney Prince. He got especially attached to this one piglet, it was a surprise to Simeon that the goodbye wasn’t tearful.

Luke smuggled that piglet out of the petting zoo and they were all over fifty miles away before anyone noticed.

Of course, everyone was just shocked that Luke had stolen something, but he looked so cute holding the little piggy… awwww…

The bros obviously joked that Luke had gone to the dark side and was totally evil because he had taken the pig, much to the poor kid’s dismay.

Simeon tried to convince Luke that he needed to return the piglet but Luke was adamant that he could totally take good care of it.

Welp, time for Lucifer to fix this.

“Luke, you need to go put the pig back, it’s not yours.”

“No! I’ll take good care of it!”

“That doesn’t matter, you stole it. It’s not your property, do you want to end up a scummy thief like Mammon?”

“No not at all. Let’s go return the pig.”

“THAT’S ALL IT TOOK?!”

[thisnoodlewritesao3]

Electric Love | Tsukishima Kei/Reader

Characters: Tsukishima Kei, Reader, Hinata Shoyo, Kageyama Tobio, Sawamura Daichi, Tanaka Ryuunosuke

Pairings: Tsukishima Kei/Reader

Warnings: Mild swearing (and by that I mean, like, 1 swear)

Word Count: 927

Summary: Tsukishima Kei hated you. You loved that. Not him. Although the powers the be don't always work on your favour, and you're certainly shocked when you find your soulmate.

A/N: I wrote this a while ago. It's kinda cute, albeit a little cringy too, but ya know. we vibe

--------

Tsukishima Kei hated you.

Well, maybe it wasn’t so much of a hate, more of a mutual dislike that you somehow found yourself looking forward to.

There were no if’s, and’s, or but’s about it; in fact, you relished in this arrangement you had.

The moment you had laid eyes on the smug blond, you knew you were destined to get under each other's skins. You’d toss back and forth snarky remarks and insults as if there were never going to be an end - something his team seemed to enjoy considering all his idiotic brainwaves were focused on you.

Of course, you just had to find your way deeper under his skin by applying to be a manager. Oh how much pride you felt when his face dropped at the sight of you. You were at each other’s throats, not literally, but you didn’t miss the flash in his eyes as he snickering about nearly hitting you with the ball.

Today was no different. You were doing your job, gathering up balls that scattered around the gym. Hinata and Kageyama were still practising, much to your dismay, but you had to give it to them, their energy was endearing.

It wasn’t until a ball flew past you that you realised how zoned out you’d been. “Watch it!” You yelled, tossing a ball at Kageyama who didn’t have a chance to dodge it.

“Tsukki!” Hinata cried with joy, pointing at you with worried eyes.

“What do you want me to do about it?” The blocker asked, pushing up his glasses and shifting his bag. That wasn’t the first time he’d called you ‘it’, it certainly wouldn’t be the last.

“I don’t know! Just stop her before she hurts me, too.” Hinata was joking, you knew that, Kageyama didn’t even look bothered by the fact you’d thrown the ball at him, a little pissed, but he wouldn’t yell.

Tsukishima turned to you, smirking down as you tightly gripped a ball.

“What got you all worked up? You miss me that bad.” Self-righteousness dripped from his tongue.

“As if,” you growled, tossing the balls back into their container, “I was finally starting to feel happy until you showed your ugly snout, pig.”

“At least I’m not a feral dog.”

“At least people like dog’s.”

“Is that your half-assed way of confessing to me?” You rolled your eyes. “Sorry, not sorry, but I’m going to have to say no.”

“Good, because I wasn’t confessing.”

“Then why are you blushing so much?” He leaned in closer and you actually had to think, am I blushing? A soft glare pulled at your features and sighed.

“You wish I was.”

“You look stupid when you’re concentrating.”

“At least I don’t need glasses to pretend I’m smart.”

“Short-stack.”

“Four-eyes.”

“Did you really run out of insults that quickly?”

“I hate you.”

“Same, now we have something in common.”

“I’m going to punch you now.” At least you had warned him. You expected him to move, but he didn’t, just smiled as you threw a punch at him with all your might.

The moment your fist hit him it felt like a lightning shock had gone through your arm, you both stumbled back, hissing in pain. What was- your mind went through the memories of your mother explaining how she’d met her soulmate, ‘it was like lightning, but he was there to comfort me, so nothing else mattered.’

Kageyama and Hinata ran to both of your sides, trying to figure out what had happened, whether you had actually managed to punch him that hard; you looked up, eyes meeting with Tsukishima who had his face twisted in anger.

“What the fuck was that?” Daichi ran into the gym to see the two of you staring at each other, the dynamic duo freaking out.

“Absolutely not.” You growled.

“That did not just happen.” Tsukishima hissed.

“Of all people, why did it have to be you?”

“I know, like, I’m so amazing and you…” He motioned to you, as if it should have been obvious.

Your hand was shaking. Was that really the first time we’ve ever touched? Every other time you’d tried to punch him, he’d dodged you, or you fell over from the impact. Of course the first time he lets you touch him, you find out you’re soulmates.

“I hate you so much.”

“I guess you don’t have a choice now,” he snickered.

“Stop smiling, you look like a tree.”

“Better than being a stump.”

“I’m going to kill you.”

“You just tried to!”

“Can somebody explain what’s going on.” Daichi had his hands firmly on his hips, eyes darting between you and Tsukishima.

“Go on, soulmate,” Tsukishima nudged you. You could have punched him again but the captain just stared at you both with wide eyes.

His mouth dropped open, slowly pulling out his phone from his pocket and calling someone, this is not going to be good. “Hey, Tanaka, who had money on them being soulmates again?”

“You were betting on it!” You and Tsukishima yelled at the same time, turning to glare at each other. “Stop doing that!” The other three burst out into laughter.

----

It was true; Tsukishima Kei hated you. Though that was a thing long in the past. He never thought his heart would flutter at the sight of you in a white dress, sneering at his blush that danced on his cheeks.

“You really look stupid right now,” you giggled when you reached his side.

“White doesn’t look good on you.”

“You love it.”

“Do I?”

“You do.”

--------

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[incorrectlumityquotes]

FULL REVIEWS: “Wing It Like Witches”

Damn, that last episode was something. It was so much of something that the hype for this episode didn’t come until after they released a screenshot of Amity in the grudgby uniform. Everyone predicted that this was the episode that had Amity join The Owl House squad and...they were right. 

The Lumity Trilogy ends with a sports balls game.

The cold open starts with Boscha of all people. 

It’s grudgby season again and all I can think of is “Wow how lucky is Luz to enroll in Hexside during the semester where shit happens.” Is the first semester the boring one with no holidays and/or events?

Anyway, I grew up in South Texas where high school football was treated like the biggest deal. I get why Boscha is being treated the way she is, and so does she.

Boscha goes to school expecting a hero’s welcome, but gets pissed when the attention is given to Willow.

Willow tells Luz that ever since she patched things up with Amity, she’s been feeling more confident. That’s really good character development. Without her resentment toward Amity (who was her oldest friend), Willow feels like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders. All that hate and sadness was bringing her down, but without it, she’s free to blossom. 

I don’t mean to quote Penn & Teller but, “And then there’s this asshole.”

Boscha is so not okay with Willow being happy with herself and just picks on her harder. Especially since it’s grudgby season and she knows she can get away with it. 

Amity tells her to grow the fuck up, and Boscha lets it slip that ever since grom Amity has been “getting soft.” This does fucking nothing since Boscha literally spends all day following Willow and friends all day picking on them like crazy. Like damn bitch, don’t you have anything else do do? Don’t you have any life outside of Willow’s?

People ask why I don’t ship Willow and Boscha and this is why. I get enemies to lovers. I get the bully becoming the love interest. Hell, it’s happening with Amity right now. But this is too needlessly cruel for my taste. There’s not way the Defeat Equals Friendship trope is going to work here. Not for me. But hope comes in the form of a useless lesbian.

Amity literally gay panics after getting ‘nam flashbacks of dancing with the girl she likes in the moonlight. Luz asks Amity for help about Boscha, and based on Amity’s answer, I don’t think Amity has ever liked Boscha. She agrees that Boscha is difficult to tolerate. It’s even worse during grudgby season because it becomes all the thinks about. Luz gets the wrong idea from that.

After literally pelting Willow with garbage, Luz challenges Boscha to a grudgby match for Willow. Again Luz’s character flaw of overstepping her bounds comes back. She never even considers what Willow might want or the fact that Willow has never even played grudgby before in her life. And that’s when another of Luz’s character flaws comes back hard. This time it’s Luz expecting life to play out like a story, or more specifically, a sports movie.

Holy crap. Is that the thorn-vault? I’ve never noticed that before.

Luz thinks that if they just try really hard they’ll beat someone who has been excelling at the sport for years. No. That’s not how life works, sweetie. I’m starting to think that maybe Luz’s mom was on to something sending her to camp.

Luz manages to convince Willow and Gus to be on board, but Amity...

She’ll be in her bunk.

Meanwhile in the B-plot (that should be my t-shirt by now), Eda is talking about her time when she was star player of her grudgby team when Lilith makes an unexpected appearance to arrest Eda. Lilith notices that Eda is wearing her old ass grudgby uniform and Eda’s response made me laugh.

“No reason. It’s laundry day.”

Lilith gives Eda a quick reality check to remind her that while Eda was good...

Lilith was better.

This photo really confused me and took me a while to realize that that was Eda and Lilith. Lilith gave herself a serious make over after school. Straightened her hair, darkened it, got ride of the glasses. I didn’t even recognize her. 

Since we all got grudgby on the brain, Eda makes a bet. She’ll go with Lilith to The Emperor peacefully if she can beat her in a game of grudgby. Luz is always pulling stuff like this and it works out for her, so why not? Speaking of which.

Willow and Gus teach Luz about grudgby. Luz teaches Willow and Gus about montages and it does not go well at all. The grudgby, I mean. The montage was great. 

In fact it’s so bad that Willow confronts Luz about the thing I was just talking about earlier. You can’t just shonen hero through all your problems. Willow and Gus give up and just leave.

I hate comparing shows because I believe they should stand on their own, but this really does remind me of when Lotte got mad at Akko in Little Witch Academia: The Enchanted Parade. Being innocently insensitive plus expecting life to play out like a movie is not a good combo. 

Luz and Amity have a heart to heart. Luz’s character flaws do come from a place love. Willow is one of the best friend’s she’s ever had and it hurts to watch her get picked on. She’s not trying to make things worse but growing up on a diet of movies and cartoons, this is the only thing she can think of.

Amity reveals that she actually used to be a jock. No joke. She was the captain of the grudgby team before Boscha. But Amity decided to make the game all about her and her teammates got hurt. So felt so bad that she never played again. Amity is rough around the edges, but deep down she’s always cared about people.

Another gay panic later, and Luz gets the right idea this time. Luz forfeits the game and agrees to take all of Willow’s punishment so that Boscha will stop picking on her.

Bitch, works for me! Think fast!

Amity senses the obvious and immediate danger and goes for help. She reminds Willow and Gus that Luz always has good intentions and needs help because that’s what friends do.

This isn’t about “friendship” is it?

Gus and Willow show up to save Luz but you need three on a team. And in true sports movie fashion, the hero arrives in the eleventh hour to save the team. I.E. the only player who is actually good at the game gives the good guys a chance to win.

Let’s get it on!

It’s game on and for a bunch of nerds the game is actually pretty competitive. It’s a magic sport, so Willow focuses on the magic while Amity focuses on the sport. Luz being Luz, even congratulates the other players when they score. Luz discovers every RPG players favorite spell, fire. 

It looks like our heroes pull off the victory in true sports movie fashion when this happens.

I stand by what I said last time. Someone on The Owl House thinks Harry Potter is really fucking stupid. Boscha catches the rusty smidge which means she automatically wins and Luz let’s out two decades of Harry Potter frustration.

But she has a point. If the golden snitch gives your team 150 points and ends the game then the only way to play would be to play defensively and focus all your efforts on finding the snitch. It means there’s literally only one decent way to play the game if you want to win.

“That just invalidates all our efforts! If catching that thing is so important, why do anything else!? There’s no reason to watch any of the other players! THAT’S SUCH A STUPID RULE!”

You tell them, Luz.

But in a twist that everyone saw coming, all the other players (Skara, Cat, Amelie) all had so much fun playing that they invite Willow to join the team. Willow politely declines because Boscha.

But we can’t have Amity help with the season finale so she hurt her leg. Amity panics at the thought of Luz carrying her, so of course Luz picks her up.

“Oh. Wow. Sports.”

Speaking of sports.

It’s game on at The Owl House and Lilith and Eda have a one on one match that’s really close. Eda decides to cheat her way to victory until.

Dammit, Luz!

Eda wins and Lilith vows to return.

The episode ends with Amity joining the fam at The Owl House.

FINAL SCORE: 5 - LOVED IT!

This episode was the best of fun episodes combined with the development of Amity episodes and you get probably my favorite episode. This was so fun and touched on most of the major characters. Even the B-plot is important because now Lilith knows the location of The Owl House. The jokes were funny. It was cute. Just everything.

The Lumity Trilogy ends on a high note. Amity is officially crushing hard on Luz. 

[livvynka]

The Vacation (Kamilah & Amy) - Part 4

Warning: SMUT and angry s*x.

I’m not native english speaker, feel free to correct me (i would be actually glad).

NOTE: This part is shorter than usual, but I still have break. Hope you like it. I would be glad for any tips or requests.

About 800+- words.

Tag list: @fal-carrington @samanthadalton @vonda-b-real @drmmyrs @straightlikewetspaghetti @blaine-hayes @lizielasyd @mrskamilahsayeed @millasayeed @ntoraplayschoices @ilove-kamilah-sayeed @kamilah-is-queen @rhonda-sayeed @queenkamilah @domakir @kwaj115 @fundamentalromantic @somethindarker @crimsonvrose @glowriter @leenasayeed

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And thank you for your support. I appreciate all likes, reblogs, comments. You are all amazing!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own these characters, they are property of PixelBerry studios!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

.

.

.

Amy freezes for a moment, she is so tired how Kamilah controlling their lives. She turns in her arms to face her and without hesitation kiss her. It is the kiss which leaves you breathless. Hunger and rage still dancing in Amy's eyes. It leaves Kamilah surprised, but she did not pull away. Amy then takes Kamilah's hand and flip their positions. Amy hurl forward and restrain Kamilah against the wall. Kamilah let out a yelp.

Amy: Not everything sorts out immediately, Kamilah.

Kamilah: Amy, I don't expect you forgive me instantly, I just want to let you know, I'm truly sorry.

Amy: Let's go back to our hotel room and talk privately.

Amy takes Kamilah by hand and with vampire speed run to their hotel room. She is crashing her hand, she really is angry, Kamilah thought. Kamilah didn't know Amy is so fast. Even Kamilah have a problem to follow her.

When they arrive at their room, Amy slams the door behind them so hard, that the door almost break from the joints. It leaves huge cracks in the wall.

Kamilah: Amy, please, listen to me. You radiate too much power again. Let's cool down for a bit and talk about this.

Amy: Stop. Telling. Me. What. I. Should. Do.

With that the pushes Kamilah to shoes cabinet near to them. Amy's eyes change to red color and her fangs fling out. She closes the space between them in flash and harshly kiss Kamilah. Kamilah automatically grab Amy by hips. But she pulls away again.

Amy: DON'T TOUCH ME! You need to deserve that first.

Kamilah: Amy .. I - I

She pulls Kamilah down from the cabinet by her silk hair and smack her ass hard.

Amy: You are always so demanding and controlling. You manipulate with me and think I'm some stupid chick! I'm your wife. But this ends now, Kamilah!

She kisses Kamilah again with her fangs out. She punctures her bottom lip and starts walking with her hand on her neck. She stops in the bedroom and with vampire speed and strength rip off Kamilah's cloths. Amy practically throws Kamilah into bed.

Amy: You are not allowed to speak or touch me. Lay on your back. Hands behind your back.

Kamilah nod and did what Amy says. Amy straddles her. Holding Kamilah steady. She grabs her neck and pulls her close, so she can kiss her again. Amy continues to Kamilah's jaw, neck and collarbone, suck her skin and then bite, Kamilah scream Amy's name and arch with every movement Amy do. Amy's hand still choking Kamilah's neck lay her with her weight, Kamilah onto her back again. She starts teasing Kamilah hard clitoris through the fabric of her panties with light touch, hardly touching her. Kamilah pants heavily. Her hearth beats so fast, she starts to think it escapes her chest. Amy unclip Kamilah's bra and with a quick move rip her panties.

She continues kissing and biting her, make a path at her stomach, lower abdomen. Amy split her thighs, bite her way to the center of Kamilah. Kamilah moans with anticipation. She wants to touch Amy so bad. Amy didn't wait too long and suck her clitoris hard. She knows Kamilah is close. She slows her movements and makes circles around the place Kamilah need her most. She put one of her hand on Kamilah's stomach, trying to hold her in place. She enters three fingers into Kamilah. Kamilah blink and hold her breath. With every moan, every pant, she quicken her movements and pump her fingers with brutal force. Kamilah starts to see stars and crying with pleasure.

Kamilah: Don't stop, please! Oh my god. I can't take this anymore. AMY! AMY!

Amy: Come for me, my love.

Kamilah let go. She has one of the strongest orgasm she ever had. Amy continues with light movements. Kamilah comes again. Amy smirks at the beautiful woman. How she makes Kamilah body tremble. Amy kiss Kamilah again, she does not care if Kamilah taste herself.

Kamilah: That was, wow. Let me make it up to you, let me touch you, please.

Amy: Later. We need to talk now. I need fresh air.

Amy stands up and extend hand to Kamilah, she accept it. Amy takes Kamilah to terrace. Amy leans on the railing. She takes a few deep breaths and look at the Kamilah.

Amy: Listen, Kamilah, I love you more than anything and I would do everything, so we can be together. But this is not going to work. I know we have, I hope, centuries, but I want to be with you now, really with you. I want to share with you every moment, every small victory, all the happy moments.

Kamilah: I understand and you are right. I love you, and I wasn't being honest with you, even with myself. When we will come back, from this vacation, I transmit my company as soon as possible.

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.

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BE CONTINUED.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

[hopelikethemoon]

Snowfall || Moonbeam III || (Ezra x Reader) {Werewolf AU}

Title: Snowfall Rating: PG-13 Length: 7,100 Warnings: Angst: short conversation of past suicidal ideation, healthy dose of self hatred, discussions of sex with other people and mild jealousy, references to drug use, and mild violence.  Reader Details: To the best of my knowledge, there are no references to Reader’s physical details, beyond being a bisexual woman. I tried my best to keep it as vague as possible. Notes: Oops, I wrote 7,100 words of angst. I’m really nervous about some of the stuff in this chapter, but let’s see! Part three of the Moonbeams series (Moonbeams & Bright Star)

Taglist: @thedaysarenotfull​ @princessbatears​ @djarin-junk​ @absurdthirst​ @hdlynn​ @legally-a-bastard​ @opheliaelysia​ @heather-lynn​ @sabinemorans​ @crazinessgraveyardsandcartoons​ @pedrospunk​ @maybege​ @chews-erotically​ @katlikeme​ @lose-eels​ @youmeanmybrain​ @theindiealto​​ @irishleesh93​ @seawhisperer​ @hdlynn​ @demigod-dragonrider-schoolidol​​ @theindiealto​​ @grapemama​​ @roxypeanut​​ @kochamcie​​ @kiwi-the-first​

“You’re what?” Shiva’s eyes widened as they stared back at you. “You’re going to have to repeat yourself because I hope I heard you wrong.”

“I’m going back to Lykaois and I need those pamphlets you showed me before.” You said, shuffling through the stack of detritus on the floor of their room. “Where are they?”

Shiva’s hands went to their hips, “Why are you going back?”

You let out a frustrated sound, relocating a pile of clothing. “Shiva, please. Where are those pamphlets?”

“I gave them back to the contract counter. I nabbed them after I thought you weren’t coming back from my mission.” 

“Kriff. I needed them.” You gritted out, pushing yourself back onto your feet. “Alright, I’ll just go down in the morning and see if I can get them scanned into my datapad before I leave.”

Shiva grabbed your arm as you started to breeze past them, “What’s up with you? You dropped out of the program, you skipped a harvest, and now you’re obsessing vover a godsforsaken deathtrap moon. What happened to you?”

“I met someone.” You admitted, shaking out of their grip as you lowered your gaze. 

“And they’re forcing you to mine lunaxium? What’s going on here? I’ll kill them.” 

“It’s not like that,” You held up your hands. “Please don’t judge me.”

“I already am.”

“I could tell.” You countered dryly, folding your arms across your chest. “Before I tell you this, just understand that I understand the risks associated with this. I met someone on Lykaois.”

“Have you lost your Grioskii mind?” 

“There is no reason to bring Grioskii into this.” You tried, though Shiva wasn’t laughing. “Look, I know it might sound crazy—“

“Is it one of those monsters?”

“Yes, but—“

“You’ve lost your mind.” Shiva laughed bitterly, “I’ve seen you get yourself into a lot of foolish situations, but this tops all of them. It’s a monster. You know, there’s a reason you’re armed with silverline ammo when you take that mission.”

“You told me it was a myth!” 

“I thought it was bullshit until I thought you were going to die on that hellscape of a moon. That planet is dangerous. You’re not going back.”

You took a step back, “Can I just explain the situation to you? Like two rational people.” 

Shiva narrowed their eyes at you, “You have three sentences.” 

“For fuck’s sake.”

“Two.”

“Shiva.”

“One.”

“I think I could really care for him.”

“Are you kidding me?” They shook their head slowly, “I always knew you had bad taste in lovers, but this…” Shiva took a step towards you, “Do you remember what you told me after Mars?”

“Ezra is not Mars.” 

“No, you’re right. Mars was just a jackass, this Ezra character is an actual monster.” Shiva encroached further on your space. “I’m sorry.” 

You blinked back at Shiva, “What?”

Instead of answering you they drove their stun shaft into your thigh — and stars burst behind your eyes. 

Your head was throbbing as consciousness started to return to you. Slowly, at first, and then all at once the light shining on you from above was too much. You rolled onto your left side and puked over the side of the cot. 

“Shiva!” You yelled, wiping your mouth off with the back of your hand. “You stunned me!”

“For your own good,” Shiva said as they strolled into the cabin, hands tucked behind their back. “Do you want a drink?” 

“Come closer, I need to puke again and your shoes look like the perfect place.” You seethed, grabbing at your head. There was nothing worse than getting stunned — nausea, headache, tingling through all of your extremities. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Shiva questioned as you started to get up. 

“To Lykaois.” 

“I don’t think so.”

Your heart sank when you realized the familiar hum of a hyperspace drive, the rattling of the durasteel grates beneath your feet. “What did you do?”

“You’ve been tied down on the Block for too long. We’re going to take a little trip to your favorite hospitable planet.”

“Shiva, I promised Ezra I would be back.” You grimaced as you felt another rush of bile rising up your throat. 

Shiva handed you a trash bin, waiting until you were done retching before responding to you, “Well, you’re going to break that promise. A couple days on Ay-7 and you’ll forget all about your monster-boyfriend.” 

You groaned and you weren’t certain the new wave of nausea was because of the stun shaft.

What would Ezra think if you didn’t turn up? He’d tried to convince you not to come back. Maybe he’d just assume that you had finally listened to him. That would be something, wouldn’t it? Because you hadn’t listened to him yet.

“Shiva, I don’t think you understand.” You rubbed at your aching head. “This isn’t like Mars or even Alia. This isn’t me falling too hard for someone who is going to hurt me.”

They gave you a skeptical look, “And after Mars, you told me if you ever acted that stupid again, I needed to take you to Ay-7.”

“I would love to have this conversation when my stomach wasn’t roiling.” You complained, closing your eyes as you prayed for your stomach to settle. “Look, Shiva… I know I’ve had a really bad track record with my dalliances. Alia used me, Mars used me… but Ezra isn’t.” 

“No?” 

You shook your head, “No, if anyone is using someone, I’m using him.” You admitted as you rubbed at your forehead. “He can’t even leave Lykaois. Ever.”

“Then you should shake off whatever this is.” Shiva wagged a finger at you. “It’s a deadend situation. Mostly dead for you if you keep playing with a monster.” 

“You don’t understand.” 

“No, I probably don’t.” Shiva narrowed their eyes at you. “But I don’t think you do either.”

“Just take me back, Shiva. I don’t need you trying to keep me from doing something stupid.” You managed to rise to your feet. “Come on, I promised that I would bring him back new clothes. That’s how insidious this arrangement is. Clothes.” You laughed bitterly, “And I practically forced him into accepting that I was bringing him new clothes.”

“He’s a monster. What does he need clothing for?” 

“Because he’s not a monster.” You snapped. “We sit around and we read poetry and talk about the places we’ve been. He was just like you and me before he was attacked. He’s a good man.” 

“You’re not going this month.” Shiva didn’t budge — they were as stubborn as you were. “We’re going to Ay-7.” 

“Fine.” 

You wished there was some way to tell Ezra to hold on another month. You’d come back to him — you weren’t breaking your promise. 

Ay-7 was a den of iniquities that had been turned into a city. Anything you could possibly want you could find it there: black market goods, illicit affairs, high stakes gambling, and the finest dusts an addict could find. 

Shiva had dragged you there more than once to get you to forget whatever situation you had gotten yourself into. But Ezra wasn’t a situation and he wasn’t someone you could just forget. 

“I’m visiting the B,” Shiva told you, raising their voice over the pulsing beat of the music. “Don’t try hotwire my ship while I’m gone.” 

You rolled your eyes, taking a drink of your polish, “Wouldn’t think of it.” 

“Try to have fun.” They patted your back, before vanishing into the fold of moving bodies as patrons danced and drank and enjoyed their night. 

Ezra probably wouldn’t miss you for a couple of days. He’d still be dealing with the effects of the change today and tomorrow. But then he’d notice. 

You had let a lot of people down in your life. That was the nature of the beast — you fucked people over and you moved on. But you hadn’t wanted Ezra to be one of those people. It wasn’t like you had any choice in the matter.

Shiva was lucky you weren’t feeling murderous. 

“Well look who it is.”

Kevva preserve me. 

You downed your polish and rotated in your seat, “Quinn. Lovely to see you.” You put on a blustery tone as you eyed the man. 

“It’s been quite some time since I last caught you here.” Quinn leaned heavily on the bar beside you, ordering a drink for himself. “What have you gotten yourself into this time?” 

“None of your business, Quinn.” You rolled your eyes, ordering yourself another drink. 

Quinn chuckled, nudging you in the ribs. “Is that how it’s gonna be this time?” He arched a brow. “I can play.”

“Quinn, I would rather gouge out my—“ You stopped yourself mid-sentence. “Do you have any plans tomorrow?”

“Might be presumptuous, but I was hoping I might be waking up beside you.” 

You groaned, but you couldn’t exactly be picky right now. “Play your cards right and maybe you will be.” You quipped, resting your hand on his arm. “Can you take me back to the Block?”

Quinn narrowed his eyes, “Why?” 

“Because I need to catch a ride and Shiva’s being an ass.” You told him bluntly. “I have somewhere I need to be and you might be my only hope.” 

“What’s in it for me?” Quinn drummed his fingers against the top of the bar. 

You bit down on the inside of your bottom lip, staring back at him. This wasn’t what you wanted, but you didn’t really have a choice. Did you? Shiva had taken that away. 

You could wait another cycle. But you didn’t want to. 

“Well,” Quinn leaned towards. “What’s in it for me, pretty girl?” 

“Take me to the Block tonight and we can do whatever you want to, Quinn.” You told him. “Just get me out of here.”

Quinn downed his drink before dramatically offering you his hand, “Step aboard. I’ll take you wherever you want to go.” 

“Just the Block.” You told him, downing your own drink and tipping the bartender before taking his hand. 

“I don’t remember datapad privileges as part of our arrangement.” Quinn remarked as he strolled into his quarters with his arms folded across his chest. 

You glanced up at him, readjusting the blankets you had wrapped around your chest. “You should know me better than that.” 

“Fair point.” Quinn chuckled as he approached the bunk. “What are you reading?” He questioned, sitting down on the bed beside you. 

“You’re cracked into the net and I wanted to look up something.” You explained, glancing back down at the datapad you had propped up on your lap. 

Quinn leaned towards you to look at the screen, “Who is he?” 

You smiled sadly at the little ID photo of Ezra on the screen. It had been taken a little over five years ago, before Lykaois. He wore the same crooked smirk you’d come to know, but he lacked that uneasy darkness you’d also become familiar with. 

“Ezra.” You told him.

“Is that who you’re trying to get to?” Quinn questioned. 

“Yeah.” You nodded, sliding your thumb over the screen, scrolling through all of the voyages Ezra had taken. He’d lost a lot of partners on his missions — a lot. “Shiva doesn’t approve.” 

“When’s that ever stopped you?” Quinn chuckled, sucking his teeth before tilting his head to look at you. “You in love with him?”

“I haven’t known him very long,” You rubbed at the back of your neck awkwardly. “It’s complicated.”

“Must be if you’re going on the net to find out about him.” 

“I actually promised myself that I wouldn’t.” You shrugged. “But I just wanted to know.” 

Quinn snatched the datapad out of your lap, “Let’s see what he’s been up to—“

“Wait.”

He squinted at the screen, before looking towards you slowly. “He’s got a D file.”

“I know.”

“For five years.”

You swallowed thickly, “He’s not dead.”

“Who’d he piss off to go into hiding?”

You grimaced, “Like I said, it’s complicated.” 

Quinn tossed the datapad back on the bed beside you as he stood back up, “Get dressed, we’re almost to the Block.”

“Tell Shiva I’m sorry.” 

“I’m not getting in the middle of that.” 

You glared at him, “I think you owe me that much.” 

Quinn shot you a look, “Pretty sure I was just supposed to get you to the Block.” You fixed him with a look right back and he wilted, “I’ll send Shiva your message.”

It wasn’t the first time you had slept with Quinn, but this time there was no amount of hot steam in your fresher that could burn off the time you spent with him. Sometimes, you had to do things you didn’t want to do — just to get by. 

And if Shiva hadn’t dragged you to Ay-7, you wouldn’t have had to. Three months ago, it wouldn’t have mattered to you either. At all. But you hadn’t been able to stop thinking of Ezra. 

What would he think if you didn’t make it to him in time? What would he think when you told him how you’d managed to get yourself back to him? 

You weren’t going to let it get under your skin. Shit happens all the time and you couldn’t always have control over it. This — you had control over. It was a means to an end. 

You hadn’t expected there to be snow on the ground when you landed on Lykaois. It wasn’t much, but it was more than you’d ever seen all in one place before. Maybe an inch. Just enough to leave footprints. 

And there were footprints. Giant footprints, all around the clearing where you always landed your transport. 

One set of prints, emerging from forest and heading into the clearing, before vanishing back into the treeline. Like something had come looking for you. 

Like Ezra had come looking for you. 

Rationally, you knew there were other werewolves on the moon, but you wanted it to be him. 

If Ezra came looking for you as the beast, it somehow made up for the fact that you’d had to get creative to make it back to him in time. 

But it didn’t explain why he was changing outside of the full moon. Was he starting to lose control of his humanity? Would every trip grow shorter and shorter until you showed up to find him—

“You came back.” 

Your heart skipped a beat as you turned around and found him standing there. His expression was almost unreadable as his eyes flickered over your face. 

“I tried to come sooner.” You admitted, taking a step towards him. “Life got in the way.” 

Ezra nodded slowly, his shoulders finally relaxing as you stopped in front of him. “I didn’t think you’d make it this time.” 

You only had a handful of days of before Ezra would be pressuring you to leave — just in case the window of opportunity was narrowing. And given the footprints in the freshly fallen snow… 

“You’re cold.” Ezra pointed out as you shivered, reaching out to run his hand down the length of your arm. “Let’s get you back inside, little lamb.”

He followed you into your transport, trailing close enough behind you that you could feel his body head radiating from him. 

“If I had known that I would be returning during the winter, I would’ve brought you warmer clothes,” You explained as you tinkered with the ship’s heating system, setting it to a comfortable temperature.

“I’m thankful for whatever you’ve brought me,” Ezra told you, “You could’ve just brought yourself and that would’ve been enough.”

You glanced over your shoulder at him with a smile, “I’ll remember that for next time.” You teased lightly, adjusting the ship’s engine exhaust into the central air system for processing. “How was the full moon?”

“I found the others,” Ezra told you, tucking his hands into his pockets. “I ran with them for the first time in years.” 

“That’s good. Right?” You smiled at him, shifting your weight from foot to foot. 

He nodded, “I was able to talk with them about what to expect.” 

Your smile faded, “What to expect?”

“It will get more difficult for me to control my transformations,” Ezra explained to you, rubbing his lips together. “Which we already know.”

“I saw the footprints.” 

Ezra swallowed thickly, “I didn’t think you were coming.” 

“I almost didn’t,” You admitted, pinching at the bridge of your nose as you tried to figure out how you were going to tell him everything. “It’s quite the story.” You told him, holding out your hand, “Let’s go sit.” 

Ezra reached out and took your hand, his thumb rubbing the center of your palm as his fingers curled around yours. 

Instead of guiding him back into your quarters, you led him into the small commons area where you had first brought him inside your world. You still couldn’t look at your little makeshift sofa without thinking of Ezra. 

“I had every intention of being here on the first day,” You sighed as you sank down onto the sofa beside him. Ezra wrapped his arm around your shoulders, his fingers fanning out over your arm, heating your skin through the fabric of your reg shirt. “The night before I was set to leave my friend — you remember, Shiva — decided to kidnap me.”

“Kidnap you?” Ezra chuckled, sliding his fingers down the length of your arm as he listened to you.

“I was trying to track down the information they had about Lykaois. I would’ve done it sooner, but Shiva had been off the Block. I tried to explain the situation to them, but…”

Ezra pressed his lips to the top of your head as you sank into his side. It was so natural to just be with him. It was nice. 

“I’ve made enough stupid choices in my life that Shiva just assumed this was another one,” You tilted your head to look at him. “It’s not.”

He chuckled, “It might be.”

“It’s not.” You assured him, lifting your hand to cup his cheek, rubbing your thumb over his scruff. “But Shiva didn’t know any better. They stunned me and flew me halfway across the system.” 

Ezra’s eyes widened, “What?”

You laughed, “I do not recommend getting stunned.” 

“No, I wouldn’t either.” He gave you a look. “Are you alright?”

“We’re getting to that,” You brushed your thumb over his bottom lip. 

Ezra’s lips tugged upwards at the corners as he looked at you, “Moonbeam, what’s wrong?”

“Shiva took me to Ay-7 which is typically my favorite place to go to just… get lost.”

He squeezed your shoulder, “I remember Ay-7.” Ezra chuckled quietly. “I was rather partial to the scene there.” 

“Me too.” You lowered your gaze. “Shiva dragged me around the city for two days before I finally found a way back to the Block.” You chewed on your bottom lip. “I just wanted to get back to you.” 

“You don’t have to come every month, little lamb.” Ezra assured you, running his hand down your arm. 

“I know, but…” You shook your head. “I enjoy this, Ezra.” You drew a line between the two of you. “I’m not just going to vanish. If something happens, if I change my mind I’m going to tell you.” 

Ezra’s gaze flickered between your eyes and your lips, before he started to lean in to kiss you. 

You stopped him before he could, pressing your hand over his mouth. “Wait.” 

His brows drew together. 

“I ran into an old… friend,” You weren’t entirely certain that you’d call Quinn a friend, but that wasn’t the point. “I knew I could get him to take me back to the Block, but not without a price.” 

Ezra’s voice was muffled against your palm, but you could easily make out. “I know.” 

“What?”

“I could smell someone on you. All over you.” Ezra worked his jaw as he held your gaze. “I told you before, it’s not my place to take issue with that, little lamb. You aren’t bound to this moon or me.”

“I know I’m not.” You sighed heavily. “I just wanted you to know. I nearly burned my skin off in the fresher, I didn’t think you’d be able to smell him still.”

Ezra shrugged his shoulders, “The scent thing is a blessing and a curse.” 

“I can imagine.” You reached out and ran your thumb down the bridge of your nose. “I just used him to get back to my transport.” 

He shook his head, “Even if it meant something—“

“It didn’t.” 

Ezra sighed heavily, rubbing at your side. “I can never leave Lykaois.” He reminded you. “You can’t stop living your life because of me.”

“I’m not missing out on much,” You said dryly, sinking into his side and resting your cheek against his shoulder. “I can’t help that I care about you, Ezra. I can’t explain it.”

Ezra sighed heavily, “Neither can I. In the past five years other people have turned up here, but it was never like this. None of them were you.”

“When I was on Quinn’s ship, I pulled up your old program file on the net.” 

“What?” He squeezed your hip. “Is it still active?”

“No, you were marked deceased.” You gestured around you vaguely. “There was a note that you hadn’t made contact after a week on Lykaois and then a few months later they marked you dead.”

“Charming.” He grumbled. “Anything interesting?”

“We narrowly crossed paths, you know. We had signed up for nearly every single harvest, but just a season off.” 

Ezra chuckled, tilting his head to look at you. “You would have loathed me, little lamb.” 

You rolled your eyes, “You don’t know my taste.” 

He arched a brow, “I think I do.” 

“Maybe you do.” You pursed your lips at him. “It made me think about what could have been if we had ended up on a harvest together. You are just my brand of trouble.”

“And no less dangerous.”

“I saw the number of partners who didn’t make it off-world.”

“I have trust issues.” He offered with a smirk. 

“Me too.” You chewed on the inside of your bottom lip. “I’ve been screwed over too many times on dicey harvests.” 

“Haven’t we all.” Ezra slid his arm out from behind you. He stared straight ahead, chewing at a hangnail on his thumb. “For what it’s worth, I care about you too.”

You reached out and played with the hair at the nape of his neck. It reminded you of that first time — the pull you felt towards him. You couldn’t really explain it, but it was like you were pulled towards him by an invisible string. 

“But this can never be anything more than it is,” Ezra reminded you, his brows furrowed together as he turned towards you. “And it will end before we’re ready for it to.”

“I know this, Ezra.” You traced your thumb over the rough skin of the scar on his neck. “But just because something has an end date, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t let it start.”

“It’s already started,” He drawled out. “Even the beast knows this.” Ezra held your gaze.

“What does the beast want from me?” You questioned, feeling your heart beat faster. 

Ezra my eyes raked over you, “More than I’m willing to give it.”

Your lips parted and you exhaled slowly, “I want to meet the beast.”

“Have you lost your mind?” Ezra snapped. 

“Probably.” You rubbed at your forehead. “I think that’s the general consensus.” 

“No. I’m not risking it.” He gritted out. “I can’t control that part of me. I don’t even remember coming out here to the clearing. I could hurt you and I wouldn’t even know.”

You nodded slowly, drawing your knees up to your chest and resting your chin on your folded arms. “How long do we have?”

Ezra dragged his fingers through his hair, sinking back against the cushion. “Five days, at the most. The prints were fresh, the snow started last night.”

“And you don’t remember?”

He shook his head, pressing his tongue to the inside of his cheek. “I came out here last night, just to see if I had missed your landing. I went back home and then… this morning I saw the tracks outside. I followed them back and here we are.”

“Someone has to have done research. All these years — all the missions here.” You drummed your fingers against your leg, turning to look at him. “I’ll try to figure something out when I go back. If we had a better understanding of when this started — what researchers have found.” 

Ezra pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes, sighing heavily. “There’s not going to be a cure, if that’s what you think.”

You stared at him, “But what if there was?”

He didn’t answer you. 

Because that would be false hope and you knew, as much as he did, that if there were the potential for a cure it would come at far too steep a cost. Those greedy prospector programs leached from everyone to line their own pockets.

He’d survived for five years. That was more than the others, apparently. 

“I couldn’t find a copy of Poe,” You told him, picking lint off your pants. “How do you feel about Dickinson?”

“Emily?” Ezra questioned, stretching his legs out in front of him, propping his heels up on the floor. “I’m regretfully not as familiar as perhaps I should be. Is she to be my new companion?”

“She’s with your new clothes in my room.” You told him, “Come on.” You reached over and gave his leg a pat before rising to your feet. 

Ezra followed you down the corridor into your quarters. You hadn’t bothered making up your bed when you climbed out in the morning — too focused on getting back to Lykaois and him. 

“Pardon the mess.” You explained, kicking a pair of boots out of your way as you wandered over to the table where you’d neatly stacked his new clothes. “I hope everything fits.” 

“I’ll make it work if it doesn’t.” Ezra shrugged his shoulders, fixing you with a warm smile. “Thank you for this.” 

“Two new pairs of pants, three shirts, and new boots.” You held your arms out to present him with the garments you’d picked up at the exchange. 

“What do I owe you?” He questioned. 

“Nothing.”

He arched a brow, “I had credits when I came to Lykaois, you know. It’s not like I’m planning to use them.” 

“They didn’t cost that much.” You assured him, but he didn’t look convinced. “Considering them a gift.”

“You’re a gift.” Ezra quipped, begrudgingly taking the clothes from you. “They smell clean.” He inhaled deeply, walking over to your rumpled bed and making himself at home. “You never know how much you appreciate good clothes.” 

You leaned back against your desk, watching as Ezra toed off his ratty boots and peeled away his worn clothes. “What happened?” You questioned with a frown as you spotted a fading bruise at the curve of his ribs. 

“They were not welcoming at first.” He told you, grimacing a little as he pulled the new shirt on over his head and it pulled at that band of muscles along his ribs. “They came around. Eventually.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose, “Ezra—“

“I’m fine.” 

“What happened?”

“These fit nicely.” He ignored you, fastening his new trousers shut, before tucking his shirt into them. “Like a glove.”

“Ezra.”

Ezra continued to ignore you, sitting back down on your bed to pull the shoes on. “A little snug, but I’ll break them in.” He said, before kicking them back off as he sank back onto your bed and reclined back. “They smelt you on me.”

“Oh.” 

“It’s fine.” 

“So, they rejected you because of me?”

He rubbed his hands together, “I’m not looking to be accepted by them.” Ezra met your eyes, “You should see the other guy. I’m scrappy when I need to be.” 

“Don’t get yourself killed.” You told him firmly, before turning away from him to grab the book of poems off your desk. 

Ezra chuckled, “I’m not trying to. Trust me, it’s not my preferred way out of this infernal place.” 

“What is your preferred way?” 

He stretched out on your bed, laying lengthwise across it. “That’s a good question, moonbeam.” He told you as he tucked an arm beneath his head. “If you’d asked me a year ago, I might’ve said something different.”

You climbed into bed with him, laying on your side to face him. “What changed?” You questioned, sliding your foot down his calf. 

Ezra clicked his tongue against his teeth, “I think you know.” He reached in between you, curling his fingers around your hand. He rubbed his thumb over the back of your hand, before bringing it to his lips and pressing a kiss to your palm. 

“In the past five years, have there ever been any other humans who stayed here?” You questioned, drawing your pointer finger over the bow of his lips. 

He shook his head. 

“And none of them have ever cared for someone who wasn’t like them?”

“I don’t know.” Ezra admitted, interlacing his fingers with yours. “You want me to ask them?”

You squeezed his hand, “I’m curious. The rumors here date back for decades. We can’t be the first to…” You tilted your face to look at him. 

“I’ll ask.” Ezra murmured as his eyes flickered to your lips, leaning in to kiss you gently. “Will you read for me?” He questioned, “I believe we’re neglecting our dear Emily.”

“Of course.” You stole one more kiss, before propping yourself up a little more upright as you flipped through the small book of poems. 

You could feel Ezra’s keen eyes fixed on you as you read, “Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul. And sings the tune without the words and never stops at all.”

He hummed his agreement with that line. 

“And sweetest in the gale is heard and sore must be the storm that could abash the little bird that kept so many warm. I’ve heard it in the chillest land and on the strangest sea. Yet never in extremity, it asked a crumb of me.” You finished, rubbing your thumb over the lines on the page. 

“I know I said it once before,” Ezra started, winding his fingers through his hair. “But I miss this sea. There are a few brooks and streams here, but none of them are the same.” 

You closed the book and sat it down on the bed beside you, “I don’t think I can bring the sea back with me. I could try.”

He chuckled quietly, “I have no doubt that you would try.” Ezra’s brows furrowed as he turned to look at you, his expression sobering. “I don’t want you wasting your life on me, moonbeam.” 

You ran your thumb over the crease between his brows, “I’m not wasting my life. That’s not how I see it.” 

“The night we met,” Ezra started, his breath warm against your palm as you ran your thumb down the length of his nose. “I was contemplating my preferred way out. Five years… it’s a long time to be alone. I’m never getting off this rock and my mind… I bristle at the thought of losing it. It’s the one thing that’s always been mine.”

“Ezra—“

“No.” He shook his head, “I was talking one last walk, exploring an area I hadn’t gone in a long time and then….” He sank back into the pillows and stared up at the durasteel ceiling above. “I caught scent of you.”

“Look, I don’t believe in fate or any of that bullshit, but that has to mean something. Doesn’t it? I won that assignment — it was supposed to be Shiva.” 

Ezra worked his jaw slowly, “I know. I have had plenty of time to think about this. To think about you and what this means.” He clenched his teeth as he turned to look at you once more and you could see a pain there that was palpable.

“I’m not going to abandon you,” You told him, dragging fingers over the ruff scruff-covered cheek. “I know it may seem unlikely, but I do keep my promises.” 

“There is a deeply selfish part of me that doesn’t want you to leave,” He confessed, curling his arm around your waist as he turned towards you. “A part of me that wants to lay claim to you.” 

Your brows rose upwards, “You are jealous!” You shoved at him playfully. 

Ezra caught your arms and held your gaze, “Maddeningly jealous.” 

“I knew it.” You hooked your leg over his, wrestling your way out of his grasp so you could straddle his hips. “I did what I had to do, with what I had to work with.”

He huffed, sliding his hands up your thighs. “I know this.”

“It wasn’t terrible,” You told him — if Quinn was terrible, he wouldn’t have been a mistake you’d made a dozen times over throughout it the years. “But it wasn’t you.”

“I’m flattered.” He drawled out, staring up at you. “But you are not stuck here, little lamb. You are free to roam where I cannot.” 

“Oh, you know me. I’m just raring to get back to Ay-7.” You said with a roll of your eyes, planting your palms on either side of his head as you leaned over him. “You’re allowed to be jealous, Ezra. That means you care.”

He smirked up at you, “I do care.” Ezra ran his hand up your back, curling his fingers around the back of your head as he drew you down for a kiss. 

Maybe it was crazy to care for someone you’d only spent a handful of days with, across two months, but you had done crazier things. If you overlooked the werewolf part of this equation. 

He spoke to a part of you that hadn’t been spoken to by anyone else. 

Ezra’s fingers slid beneath the hem of your shirt, sliding over bare skin as his lips slanted against yours. A low growl rumbled in his throat and you broke away from the kiss to catch your breath. “Little lamb?”

“Yes?”

“I need to leave.”

“What?” You frowned as you stared down at him, “If you need to leave, you’re going to have to let go of me.” He had a vice-like grip on your hips. 

He closed his eyes and exhaled slowly, “Something doesn’t feel right.” Ezra’s brows knit together, his lips drawn into a thin line. “Something—“

“You have to let go.” You urged, trying to pry his fingers off of you. “Ezra, please.” 

He didn’t look right either. He hadn’t looked right since you saw him standing outside your transport, but you had chalked it up to the cold weather and the exhaustion of everything. 

“Let go.” You leaned forward and slapped at his cheek, “Ezra you have to let me go.” 

His lips parted as he inhaled deeply, his eyes snapping open and his unfocused gaze fixed on you. “I don’t understand.” Ezra mumbled, his grip loosening just enough for you to scramble off of his lap. “I need you to go. I need you to—“ His words were cut off by a weak groan, his brows furrowing together in pain. “You wanted to meet the beast and I think it heard you.”

“Oh gods.” You clambered off the bed, tripping over his shoes and hitting the floor with a resounding thud. “Shit!” You had seen that holovid before. 

Morbid curiosity had you desperate to see the beast, but you knew better. There just wasn’t anywhere werewolf-proof to go. 

You swore under your breath as you caught sight of crimson blood on your skin where you’d landed hard on the grated texture. 

Ezra noticed too. 

You scooted backwards on your ass, locking eyes with him as he peered at you from an unnatural position on the bed. 

He had told you before — bones break, muscles tear. He hadn’t been lying. 

“Go.” He growled out, a sound far more vicious than you were familiar with. 

You grabbed onto the side of your wardrobe trunk, dragging yourself up off the floor. If you weren’t going to be bruised from his rough touch, the floor had made up the difference. 

There was only one place to hide. 

The fresher. 

You snatched up your datapad and ran barefoot down the corridor, locking yourself into your fresher under the guise of safety. But you had seen the beast — if it wanted in, it would get in. 

 Watching Ezra transform through the video on your datapad was an unnerving sight that you weren’t ever going to forget. He stripped off his clothes and collapsed onto the ground where you had fallen. 

He writhed on the floor, moaning in agony as his body contorted. There was no part of him that looked the same once the transformation began. 

But why? You were days removed from the full moon, he had taken the lunaxium, and nothing was different from any other time you had engaged in a little fun together. 

Why had it chosen now to break loose again?

The beast you had seen in the clearing was Ezra. It’s fur was the same shade of chestnut as his own, with a fleck of blonde that you hadn’t seen before. But it didn’t seem as fearsome as it had that morning — not as it laid on the floor of your bedroom whimpering like a lost dog. 

You almost felt bad for him, if it weren’t for the whole part where he could easily rip you in two with his bare bestial hands. 

When you used to picture your death, it typically ended staring down the barrel of a colleague turning on you. Never in your wildest dreams had you pictured yourself locked in your fresher, watching the transformation of the werewolf that might rip the fresher door off and eat you alive.

Why now? 

He hadn’t seemed entirely right since you brought him inside, but you had been off too. You almost wished you’d just stayed on Ay-7 and waited until next month. But you didn’t want to abandon him. 

You glanced back down at the screen, your heart stopping as you found the view into your quarters empty. You cycled through the camera views, trying to find the rogue beast, but you didn’t need the camera to find him. 

Ezra — the beast — growled outside the fresher door, claws scraping loudly over the durasteel. Of course he’d found you. 

He had heightened senses as a human, with a canine nose there was no doubt he could smell you. Fresh blood, halted arousal, and evidently Quinn. 

You sat your datapad down on your sink, staring at your reflection in the mirror as you contemplated your way out of this. There was one air duct, but there was no way you could climb through it. Your weapons were all laying by your bed, on the other side of the door and the dangerous monster. 

“Never been one to believe in a higher power, but… Kevva, Yrica, Ruke — whichever one of you exists.” You laughed awkwardly as you glanced upwards. “Help?”

 Ezra growled again, before slamming some of his body weight against the door — enough to make you jump backwards and the door groan under the pressure. 

Maybe you were still dreaming. Stun shafts always gave you nightmares. The last few days had been a nightmare. 

You glanced down at the database, staring at the scene taking place on the other side of the door. The camera was mounted further down the corridor, but you could see enough of the hulking monster to know you weren’t getting out of this alive. 

The only weapons you had was a toothbrush, a nail file, a toilet, and a steam shower. 

You could hide in the shower — it would delay your inevitable death by a few seconds. 

If you survived, Ezra was going to disappear. You knew that much. This was over, whatever it was. So maybe you should just open the door and let the monster in.

He growled again as he scratched at the door, his nails grinding over the durasteel and making your ears ring. 

Those would be the same flaws ripping you open. 

Shiva was right — you had lost your mind. 

You weren’t going to go down, cowering in the corner of your shower in fear as your clandestine lover ripped you to shreds. That wasn’t how you rolled. 

This was happening and you just had to accept it. 

You caught your reflection in the mirror again, before turning on your heels to face the door. Your fingers shook as you reached out and hit the button that slid open the door. 

Your heart beat was pounding in your ears as you came face-to-face with the beast on the other side of the door. He was a hulking, massive creature that had to crouch down to avoid hitting the ceiling. 

Ezra growled, a sound that rattled your bones. 

You clenched your eyes closed, anticipating the first blow — but it never came. You opened one eye hesitantly, nearly swallowing your tongue as you realized the beast was just staring at you. 

“Hi?” You tried, not quite trusting your own voice as you stared up into familiar eyes. 

The beast hunched down, sniffing at the air around you inquisitively. It leaned down, planting one fearsome paw onto the ground near your foot as its muzzle hovered a few inches from your face. 

Ezra — the beast — sniffed at your injured hand, before nudging at your arm with a little more force than you anticipated. You jumped back, causing him to growl fiercely at your sudden movement like a feral dog. 

You held up both hands, back up a step. “I’m not going to hurt you.” You told him, staring at his eyes and hoping he understood you. 

The werewolf lowered its head once more, sniffing around you curiously before nudging at your arm again. 

“Do you know who I am?” You questioned as you hesitantly reached out and touched the top of his massive head. 

He growled again, but it wasn’t like the other growls. It was a quiet, almost content sound. 

You gently stroked your fingers through the soft fur by his ear, “Do you like that?” 

Ezra huffed.

“You’re not just playing with your food, are you?” You chewed on your bottom lip as you caught sight of just how massive the teeth in his mouth were. His ears twitched and he growled quietly. 

You had a feeling there was no research into this. 

[normal-thoughts-official]

Thots on a figure skating au??? 🅱️lease

hmmmmmmm ok so disclaimer that i know nothing about figure skating so i'm just making up whatever

you got me in a difficult position here cuz on the one hand, i'd love for magnus to be a trainer/coreographer. i think it suits him wonderfully and that while obviously he is great at dancing and loves it, i think that he's more on the creative side of things, you know? so i could imagine something like figure skater alec and trainer magnus. and like alec is a shadowhunter so of course that demands a high level of control over your body that is similar to a figure skater's

but at the same time its funny to me to try to imagine alec figure skating when hes a fucking giant like that because like hes so big?? and when ur big like that ur kind of like... mandatorily graceless and clumsy to a degree methinks (not in a like oh hes always tripping and blushing way, more like the "you're on my leg, you asshole" blooper), because things aren't made for you. like really its an actual matter of accessibility sometimes, especially if you actually have the proportions of a real person like alec does (well, except for the yaoi mcfuckhands. they look big even compared to the rest of his ridiculous body he just b standing there and im like christ edward fingerhands we get it) cuz then Everything Is Bigger Than It Should ya feel

so yeah i can't really imagine alec in like, spandex being all graceful and shit, but at the same time rationally i could imagine that for his character, but also no. so i can't really go with that idea without laughing

but also i can't imagine him as a trainer/coreographer and i don't know who the fuck else is involved with figure skating anyway so is alec like, the janitor or some shit???? some fucking basketball player who sees him at the olympics??? lord help me i have no idea

OK SO IT'S BEEN LIKE 5 MONTHS SINCE I FIRST PUT THE FIRST PART OF THIS ANSWER IN MY DRAFTS (rip anon im so sorry) and i THINK i got it!!! alec could be like, the uhh personal trainer? physical trainer? YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN like the one dedicated to making sure the figure skater's body is. capable of. dancing. idk how to explain it but you do get it don't you??? ok

i'm mostly going off my dancing experience here (i had dance classes for like, 10 years of my life, and ugh i miss it) and like besides dancing you always have to train like lifting and doing localized training and stuff because you can't really dance if you don't have strength and flexibility and stamina and all that stuff. the only time i would willingly work out was for dancing lmao especially when i was in my hiphop crew. anyway

and while for me the one responsible for that part of training was the same person as my teacher/coreographer (or when i was doing hiphop it was just. on me to do that lmao but i'm not complaining) i figure when you're a professional and not just a dumb kid that's probably two different people, right? if not it is now. idc

i could go with figure skater magnus and trainer alec but also im really feeling the dynamics of coreographer magnus and trainer alec? like it'd be cute/funny to see them trying to work together for that ya know. so sorry that this feels less like a figure skating au especially since it took me so long to answer it but aaa

but also i mean as a coreographer magnus would have to know how to do it obviously so you would most definitely get a figure skating magnus. alec going to close up the gym and seeing magnus practicing by himself just for fun, anyone? and magnus looks gorgeous as ever way more gorgeous than whoever they're coaching but that's just alec's opinion and magnus kind of stops like "oh, i didn't know you were here" and alec's like "oh oops. anyway keep going you're great at this" and magnus feels a little self conscious but soon he gets lost in it again because really he loves doing this and alec is just appreciating the artwork :)

ANYWAY the dynamics of trainer and coreographer are fun. magnus showing up to alec like "hey alec so i need some heavy lifting on them arms cuz meliorn [idk i don't have any better ideas for who they could be coaching] is gonna carry an elephant onstage" and alec is like "uhh" and meliorn is like "a fake elephant" and alec is like "i mean good but i still have questions"

and magnus is like "obviously we would never use trained elephants, the way they are treated is inhumane" and alec is like "you're completely right but also that's your only worry when it comes to meliorn carrying a real elephant?" and magnus is like "i'm sure you could pull it off ;) you're the best after all" and alec gives him that amused smile

advantages of meliorn: they don't care about the flirting anyway since they are literally Like That too

also magnus and alec working out together off the clock, some ogling on both sides and just generally funny competitive shenanigans. especially cuz like magnus is hella fit but alec works in that stupid gym so he knows what he's about. and alec's all smug about it like "i can lift more than you :)" and magnus is like "oh yeah? let's see how you do in the ring" "no" "yes" "no" "why, can you not do it?" "yes. i know my limits" "well that's too bad... because you're going in anyway"

cue alec falling on his face probably but also like goddamn it he's competitive and he's not gonna let magnus have too much of a win so he tries his best rip. anyway then we probably get some hip touching bullshit when magnus tries to explain it to him and magnus is flirting the whole time and alec's laughing and it's sweet

i have half a mind to make up some angsty backstory about how magnus used to be a figure skater too and his partner was (you'll never guess it) camille and then she pulled the rug from under him and he kinda left the competitions altogether for a while. and then he came back as a coreographer (listen, he loves to dance, but creating is one of his favorite parts and he was always involved in coreographing anyway. his old coreographer and him were always having a blast and camille did not like it) and this is kinda his debut as a coreographer at some big shot competition idk and he just feels like he has so much to prove?

lol bonus camille's new coreographer is lorenzo so the hating magnus squad is in thick against him and it's a whole thing you know

OH MEGA ANGSTY camille got him out of the competition because she outed him as trans and he was declassified because something something transphobic bullcrap so he wasn't allowed anymore. i assume this was like right after they won because of course she wouldn't compromise herself, or maybe it was at the beginning/pre-stages of the championship so she had time to find a new partner. yeah that last one and then she won with the coreography that he had helped them create. im saying she did that because he broke up with her finally after years of abuse both in work and out of it so she did that as revenge or to make sure he couldn't have his passion anymore. and it took magnus years to build himself back up as a coreographer this time because transphobia (and racism) in the market but guess what? he is extremely smart and talented and creative so now he is back at the championship and he wants to show the world what they have been missing on

hmmmmm also i implied this is in pairs since magnus and camille used to be one so i think meliorn's pair would probably be izzy and maybe that's why alec's involved? like he was already a personal trainer or whatever which his parents were fine with even though it's not of course as grand as they would've liked (meaning they were total asses about it) but when izzy decided to go into sports/art they lost their shit and didn't want to support her so, you know, alec did and became her trainer. which is just as well because he is the best so like, deal with it. not saying they like kicked her out or anything (esp cuz i imagine part of alec's reasoning is that izzy stood by him when he came out and if they didn't kick him out over being gay they wouldn't kick her out over being a skater but y'know) but they definitely wouldn't support her so they both also feel like they have a lot to prove

lol me: i have half a mind to make this angsty. also me: paragraphs and paragraphs of angsty backstory

anyway they win obviously idk what to tell you they just do cuz we stan talent. camille is second for maximum drama and vengeance, the lightwoods try to get the spotlight once izzy wins and she and alec tell them to fuck off, they advocate for specific rules prohibiting ppl to declassify trans ppl over being trans and that's all i have tbh

sorry it took so long to answer daiudsauihda but i hope that outline is at least interesting for you!

[prettyboy-parker]

i’ll be waiting for you in san junipero (but only if you want me to)

if you haven’t seen the black mirror episode, read on AO3 for a short introduction. if you have, continue!

words: 6.5k

warnings: nff, drinking, smoking, terminal illness, past stony, character death (not detailed), and semi-public sex

spotify playlist

1987

Pink and purple light floods over the hot mass of bodies in the center of the club, shouts of laughter filling the stuffy air. Bananarama’s one-hit-wonder “Venus” blares from the speakers, the bass giving the club its own heartbeat. The flashing Tucker’s sign makes Peter flinch as he slips inside. Someone blows cigarette smoke into the open, which makes him cough and wave the smoke away.

“S’cuse me,” He squeaks, pushing past a preppy-dressed man talking lowly to a bubble gum popping woman. They both look up at him in annoyance before turning back to their conversation. Peter grimaces and wipes his sweaty hands on his jeans. He weaves his way around the people mulling about and slips over to the bar.

The bartender doesn’t see him at first, too busy fixing a drink for another patron. But the blonde eventually notices him, and Peter gives him a shy smile.

“What can I get for you?” The man asks, his smile tight. There’s a tired lilt to his voice, and Peter nearly feels bad for him. 

“Um, just a Coke, please,” He squeaks, nervously resting his hands on the bar counter. He yanks them away right after, settling on hanging them by his sides.

“Just a Coke? Not like, a rum and Coke?” The bartender asks; his face twisted sourly.

“Just a Coke,” Peter repeats with a nod. The man grimaces and pulls out a chilled glass of Coca Cola.

“Thanks,” Peter says, but the bartender is already out of earshot.

“Fuck off, dude! I sucked you off last week!”

Peter’s heart jumps and he spins around, pressing his back against the wood of the bar.

A man is heading towards him, and he’s moving very quickly.

He has a disgruntled look on his face, and his big brown eyes are narrowed in annoyance. Peter feels the moisture leaves his mouth when he sees the man’s sharp collarbones peeking out from the collar of his printed shirt. The man stops short next to Peter and slings his arm around the shorter’s shoulders.

“Pretend like you know me,” The man murmurs into Peter’s ear, sending shivers down the boy’s spine.

“Tony! What are we, kindergarteners? Talk to me!”

Another man, a little younger (yet taller) than Tony, emerges from the crowd of people.

“Leave me alone, Stephen. I don’t do seconds.” Tony grumbles, rolling his eyes. His arm is heavy on Peter’s shoulders, and the brunette is woozy at the feeling of Tony’s side pressed against his.

“You don’t do seconds?” Stephen scoffs, stopping in front of the two. “I think Maya would beg to differ.”

Peter can feel Tony tense up against him.

“Go away, Stephen. I’m trying to have a conversation,” The man spits, tucking his free hand in the back pocket of his jeans. Stephen looks at Peter warily.

“Oh, really? Or are you just looking for another fuck?”

Peter can feel heat creep onto his cheeks.  Tony throws his head back and laughs.

“Fuck off. He’s an old friend from college,” Tony tells Stephen, giving Peter a pat on the bicep. Stephen looks like he doesn’t believe a word that came out of Tony’s mouth, but he still walks away with a huff.

“Jesus, a guy can never get a break around here,” Tony mutters angrily, slipping his arm off of Peter’s shoulders.

“I’m sorry he was being an ass,” Peter says softly, anxiously rocking on his heels. Tony shrugs.

“I can’t blame him. Who wouldn’t want piece of this?” Tony jokes, a goofy smile on his face as he gestures to himself. Peter chuckles and shakes his head.

“Anyways, I’m Tony,” The other man says, sticking out his hand. Peter takes it and gives it a loose shake. “And you are?”

“Peter,” The brunette replies before dropping Tony’s hand.

“ Peter ,” He repeats, and Peter melts at the sound of his name coming from those plump lips. Tony’s eyes flick down to his glass.

“Rum and Coke?” He asks, cocking an eyebrow.

“Just a Coke,” Peter says bashfully. Tony gives him a funny look, but still smiles.

“You’re cute,” He purrs, voice quiet under the music of the club. Peter’s stomach churns and he lets out a breathy laugh. The smaller man puts his drink on the counter. “Let’s dance. You wanna dance?”

“Oh, I don’t-“

Tony grabs his hand before he can finish and pulls him into the throng of dancing people. Peter yelps in surprise, but allows the man to whisk him away. Tony’s hand is warm and a little bit sweaty, yet Peter doesn’t mind.

“I love this song!” Tony shouts when “She Blinded Me With Science” by Thomas Dolby plays from the speakers. The crowd cheers and Tony grabs Peter’s other hand.

It's poetry in motion

She turned her tender eyes to me

As deep as any ocean

As sweet as any harmony

Tony sways his hips back and forth in time with the music. Peter laughs softly, standing stiffly.

“Come on, loosen up!” Tony tells him, grinning wildly. Peter tries to sway his body like Tony, but he just feels stupid. The other man doesn’t seem to notice, because he moves closer to Peter.

Mm, but she blinded me with science

She blinded me with science

And failed me in biology, yeh yeh

“There you go! Don’t ever say you can’t dance,” Tony yells over the music, running his tongue over his bottom lip. A giggle bubbles from Peter’s throat.

Now uh, huh huh

When I'm dancing close to her

Blinding me with science, science

Science

“I think we should go get some air,” Peter calls out, swinging him and Tony’s hands side to side. “It’s really hot!”

Tony finds that funny and laughs. As the song comes to an end, the two weave their way back through the crowd. Tony steers him past the arcade machines and to the peeling back door.

“Fuck, it’s like an oven in there,” Tony groans once they get outside, the door shutting behind him with a heavy thud. Peter watches him slip a cigarette and a lighter out of his back pocket.

“Yeah, I didn’t expect it to be so hot in there,” Peter says, leaning against the brick wall of the club. Tony places the end of the cigarette in his mouth.

“Expect?” Tony asks, giving him a funny look. “Is this your first time here?”

Peter avoids Tony’s gaze and looks at his Vans.

“Yup,” He murmurs, awkwardly fiddling with his belt. Tony reaches out and encases Peter’s wrist with his fingers. The brunette holds his breath as Tony runs his thumb over his wrist.

“How about we head to mine?”

Peter’s heart stops in his chest.

And then, he yanks his hand away.

“No!” He exclaims, but immediately regrets it when he sees the look on Tony’s face. “I mean, I would, but-“

“Hey, don’t sweat it.” Tony says coolly. He flicks the lighter and brings the flame to his lips. “It’s almost midnight, anyways.”

***

One Week Later- 1987

Dark hair. Dark eyes. Bright smile. Honey-smooth voice.

Peter scans the crowd for Tony, eyes flicking over the sweaty bodies. He doesn’t see him right away, and he can’t help but feel a little disappointed. Tony has been on Peter’s mind all week since their first meeting. Over much thinking (and internal bickering), he’s decided to find Tony again.

He hasn’t fucked anyone since his 20’s, okay?

San Junipero is advertised as a getaway, a place where you can do whatever you want-without repercussion. He would have waited to get to know Tony more before even kissing him, but Peter quickly learned that’s not how they roll here.

Snapping out of his thoughts, he shuffles around the edge of the dance floor. Half of him wants to run and find somewhere on the beach to sit and mull, but the other half yearns to find Tony.

And there he is.

Peter stops in his tracks, right next to the cluster of arcade games. He spots Tony nestled on one of the pink vinyl seats, looking bored as a girl with big hair talks to him. He looks good, his hair slicked back and a cherry red letterman jacket wrapped around his broad frame.

Tony looks up.

Peter’s breath catches in his throat when their eyes meet. Tony’s doe eyes go wide, and Peter gives him a shy wave. The older man says something to the girl next to him before getting up and weaving his way around the crowd.

There’s a small smirk on Tony’s face when he approaches Peter.

“I’ve changed my mind,” The smaller man says. “I-I want you.”

Tony grins like the cat that got the cream.

“I knew it,” He murmurs, stepping closer to Peter. He reaches out and gently brushes Peter’s bicep with his hand. “Everyone gets the first day jitters.”

Peter laughs, but his heart pounds against his rib cage. Are there the second day jitters, too? Tony shuffles a little closer and wraps one arm around his waist.

“I’ve got a little place next to the ocean. You ready to go?”

Poor old Johnny Ray

Sounded sad upon the radio

But he moved a million hearts in mono

Our mothers cried, sang along, who'd blame them

Peter smiles as the wind tousles his curls, glancing over to Tony. The older man winks and revs the engine of his Mustang. ( “1983 Ford Mustang Convertible, baby. The best out there,” Tony had said, but Peter was too lost in his eyes.)

“Almost there, sugar!” Tony shouts over the wind, taking a particularly sharp left. Peter shrieks as they lean to the side.

You're grown (so grown up)

So grown (so grown up)

Now I must say more than ever

(Come on, Eileen)

Too ra loo ra too ra loo rye aye

And we can sing just like our fathers

“Holy shit, be careful!” Peter yells, but there’s no fear in his voice. Tony laughs, loud and bright and warm . He reaches to the side and tucks his hand over Peter’s thigh.

Come on, Eileen, oh I swear (what he means)

At this moment, you mean everything

You in that dress, my thoughts I confess

Verge on dirty

Ah, come on, Eileen

Tony eventually slows his speed when they reach the beach, passing the clumps of twirling sea grass and sand dunes.

His house is very cute.

It reminds him of the old beach house they would rent on the shores of Long Island, a desperate attempt at a picture perfect vacation while his mother was dying. The house is a watered down blue color, weathered from the sun and the sand. There’s no decorations, no plastic flamingoes, no welcome mat. But it’s cute.

“Home sweet home,”  Tony sings once he shuts off the car. Peter laughs softly before unbuckling his seatbelt.

“Oh, you might want to take your shoes off now. The sand can be a bitch.”

“True,” Peter replies, undoing the laces of his sneakers with shaky hands. Tony does the same, then swings open the car door. Peter tucks his socks into his shoes and climbs out the car. The sand feels nice between his toes; soft and smooth.

Peter follows Tony into his house, glancing over his shoulder when they clamber up the porch steps. The city glows behind them, tiny lights dotting the landscape.

“Slow poke!” Tony laughs, snapping Peter out of his thoughts. He wraps his hands around the younger’s waist and pulls him inside. Tony kicks the door closed and Peter drops his shoes on the ground. With a flash of bravery, he rests his hands on Tony’s chest. The older man lets out a breath, and their lips are so close that the air hits Peter’s.

“I wanna kiss you,” Peter blurts, leaning closer into Tony’s touch. The corner of the man‘s mouth twitches.

“Then kiss me.”

Peter presses his lips to Tony’s. He does it a little too forcefully, too enthusiastically, because Tony stumbles backwards. He regains his footing though, and kisses back happily. Peter squeaks when Tony squeezes his ass.

“ Tony ,” Peter breathes as Tony moves his wet lips down his cheek and to his jaw.

“I’ve been thinking about getting my hands on you,” Tony grumbles against his warm skin. The feeling of his teeth makes Peter shudder. “When I saw you at the bar, I needed to get you in my bed.”

Peter lets out a shaky moan at Tony’s words, hips stuttering when he sucks a bruise onto his neck. Peter can feel the hard outline of Tony’s dick against his thigh.

“S-Speaking of that bed,” The smaller man stutters, tangling his fingers in Tony’s hair.

“Right over there,” He replies, gently grabbing Peter’s hands and removing them from his hair. The brunette giggles as Tony guides him to the bed, the bed that’s, for some reason, pushed against the living room windows. When Tony sees the look on his face, he smirks.

“I like everything in one room, baby. Except the toilet.” He explains while he gets Peter onto the bed. Peter laughs and kisses Tony again, letting the older man push him so he’s lying down. The pressure of his crotch against Peter’s makes the younger man moan against Tony’s lips. He tries to grind upwards, searching for relief against his aching cock.

“Get this fuckin-this shirt off,” Tony growls, yanking at the hem of Peter’s shirt and pulling it over his head. Tony sits upwards, shucks off his jacket, and takes off his own shirt, throwing it onto the ground. Peter’s mouth goes dry as he eyes the trail of dark hair that leads to Tony’s... yeah . Peter reaches out and touches his navel.

“Ngh, fuck,” Tony groans, hurriedly unbuckling his belt and pulling it from the loops. Peter’s chest heaves as he undoes his belt. Tony rolls to the side, unfortunately off of Peter, and starts to take off his shoes. Peter shimmies out of his jeans awkwardly, whimpering when his hand brushes over his rock hard cock. 

“Pete,” Tony breathes after he takes off his jeans.

Peter pulls Tony into a kiss by his neck. The older man groans and cups both of Peter’s cheeks. The brunette reaches down and gently squeezes Tony’s dick through his cotton boxers.

“Shit!” He hisses, and in a sudden move he pulls Peter’s boxers down his pale thighs. Peter sighs when his cock is finally freed, bobbing in the cool air. It’s still the same smaller-than-average size as real life, unfortunately. But Tony’s cock is big, thick and veined and leaking precum.

“Look at you,” Tony coos, wrapping his tan fingers around Peter’s length. He lets out a high pitched whine at the friction and slick sound. “All this for me?”

“ Y-yes ,” Peter pants, tangling his fingers in the sheets. Tony shuffles closer so his own cock is lined up against Peter’s. The sight is absolutely filthy.

“I hate to admit it, but I’m really close,” Tony groans, beginning to stroke both himself and Peter at the same time. Peter’s hips jerk upwards, making his cock rub against Tony’s

“ Tony ,”  Peter cries, falling forward and mouthing at the older man’s neck. For the next couple of moments, the sounds of grunts and moans fill the room. The up and down motion of Tony’s hand makes Peter’s gut curl, and before he knows it-

“Fuck!” Peter shouts as his balls tighten and he spills his release over Tony’s hand. Tony breathing picks up as he nears his climax, using Peter’s cum to slick his own cock. With a loud moan, Tony reaches his orgasm.

“Baby,” Tony mumbles once he catches his breath. Peter lets out a breathy laugh as Tony flops down on the bed. The younger man does the same, lying so close that their noses almost touch. Tony smiles, and the way his gorgeous eyes crinkle make Peter feel all warm and fuzzy.

“That was- s’really good,” He slurs, reaching out and barely grazing Tony’s cheek with his fingertips. His skin is warm, flushed a sweet pink.

“Damn right it was,” Tony laughs, wrapping his clean arm around Peter’s waist. “Do y’know what time it is? I cant remember when we left the bar.”

“It’s almost-“

Peter jolts upwards, the gentle beep of the monitor filling his ears.

“Midnight.”

*** Another Week Later- 1990

Strike a pose

Strike a pose

(Vogue, vogue, vogue)

(Vogue, vogue, vogue)

Peter awkwardly tucks his hands into the pockets of his overalls, breathing heavy from his trek around the club. He’s looked everywhere and he just can’t find Tony. He knows he’s being clingy and weird, but Tony has been constantly on his mind.

Look around, everywhere you turn is heartache

It's everywhere that you go (look around)

You try everything you can to escape

The pain of life that you know (life that you know)

Peter spots the man from a few weeks ago standing by the bar. What was him name again? Stefan? Steven?

Stephen!

Peter, although a little too enthusiastically, rushes down the small set of steps to the tall man. He doesn’t look up right away, of course, but he does when Peter calls out his name.

“Do I know you?” Stephen grunts, narrowing his ice blue eyes. Peter smiles warily.

“Have you seen Tony?” He asks, chewing on his bottom lip.

“No,” Stephen replies, a sour look on his face. He takes a sip of his beer. “You too, huh?��

Peter feels his stomach lurch.

“I-I don’t know. I guess I’ll go now,” He mutters. Stephen raises his hand.

“Try looking somewhere else. ‘02. Mid 70’s. Good luck.”

Come on, vogue

Let your body move to the music (move to the music)

Hey, hey, hey

Come on, vogue

Let your body go with the flow (go with the flow)

You know you can do it

***

One Week Later- 1978

“Holy smokes, you are so good at this!”

Peter smiles and jiggles the joystick of the Space Invaders machine. The girl, Betty, is leaning over his shoulder, watching the screen intently. He’s nearly at 2000 points, but with one rogue alien his last life is taken. He throws his head back and groans. Betty shrieks and grabs Peter’s shoulders.

“Come on Pete, let’s go dance! ABBA is my absolute favorite,” She giggles, spinning Peter around. The brunette opens his mouth to respond, but he spots who’s standing at the Asteroids machine.

“Um, I actually-I’m sorry Betty. There’s someone I need to talk to. I’ll see you around?” Peter stutters, and the blonde’s face falls flat.

“Okay. Maybe 2005?”

Peter smiles and Betty rushes off.

“Tony. I know you know I’m here,” Peter says once it’s just him and Tony in the arcade corner. The game makes a sad beep as he slams on the machine. Peter flinches. “Talk to me. Why are you avoiding me?”

Tony turns around, arms crossed.

“Calm down.” He grunts, avoiding Peter’s gaze.

“Tony! Why?” Peter pleads, taking a step closer to the other man. Tony awkwardly shifts on his feet.

“I need change,” He explains; his face stony.

“Change my ass!” Peter nearly shouts. He doesn’t want to draw attention to himself, but it’s hard not to. “You’re hiding from me.”

“I don’t owe you shit , Peter.” Tony growls, finally snapping. Peter flinches in surprise. His tone makes the younger’s throat tighten.

“Now leave me alone,” Tony grumbles, running off into the crowd. Peter’s stomach drops to his toes, but he rushes after Tony. He keeps the man’s dark hair in view as he pushes past patron after patron, tears pricking the corners of his eyes as he reaches the front door.

“Tony!” Peter cries once both of them are outside. He runs forward and grabs Tony’s thin wrist.

“Peter, stop it,” Tony says softly, resting his hand on Peter’s bicep. “I’m not here to fall in love.”

“Then what are you here for?” Peter asks, placing his free hand on Tony’s chest. “Why are you trying to fuckin’ fight this?”

“Because I’m not staying here,” Tony explains. “Once I’m gone, I’m gone. Screw this place. I like you, Peter. I really do. But this place-“ He looks around at the buildings on the street. “It’s not fair. Morgan-my daughter, my babygirl-she didn’t get this. It was cancer. She was 30. And my husband didn’t want this either. He was the light of my life, you know. A big blonde oaf. It wasn’t fair to take something Morgan didn’t have. So why should I?”

Peter’s breath catches in his throat.

“Oh Tony,” He mutters, and without thinking, he presses his lips to the other’s. Tony kisses back immediately, slipping his hand onto Peter’s cheek. The smaller man leans into Tony’s touch. Suddenly, a soft beep emerges from between them.

“Fuck,” Tony utters once they pull apart, lips slick and shiny with spit. “There’s 3 minutes until midnight.”

Peter doesn’t respond.

“Okay, um, next week. Meet me at the Quagmire,” Tony says hurriedly. Peter looks at him, confused. “It’s a club. Well, sort of. Just ask around and you’ll find it. How about 1987?”

“Yeah,” Peter whispers, “See you then.”

***

Next Week- 1987

In the middle of nowhere sits the broken down building of the Quagmire. The rows of motorcycles and smoke billowing out of the club tell him all he needs to know about the place. He quickly changes his outfit (one of the technological perks of San Junipero) to a more fitting look: a loose red t-shirt, black skinny jeans, and good old-fashioned Doc Martens. He feels awkward; he’s dressed like the guys he used to jack off to.

His boots crunch on the gravel as he walks up to the front doors, which are swung wide open. He can hear the faint thump of the music from above, as the only thing on the first floor is a staircase and a man slumped in the corner. Peter grimaces, and without touching the handrail, he walks up the stairs. The music gets louder and the smell of weed gets more potent. There’s a few people mulling around in the hallway leading to the main room. A guy with black-rimmed eyes blows smoke up into the air and a girl with a fucking snake around her shoulders winks at him. He gives her a weak smile and steps into the crowd.

There’s cages hanging from the ceiling with pierced girls in them and everyone’s in leather. It feels like the place Harry would always try to get him to go to back when they were in college.

He never went.

Instead of dancing, the people around him are grinding and kissing each other. It’s awkward and Peter’s too caught up in the mess of people to focus on where’s he going; he runs into a very hard body.

“Woah there, sugar,” The man purrs as Peter stumbles backward. He opens his mouth to respond, but no sound comes out. The man is gorgeous, with a perfect smile, sharp jaw, scruffy beard, and loose strands of long brown hair that frame his pretty face.

“I’m so sorry,” Peter stammers, feeling trapped in the low light of the club. The man laughs and claps him on the shoulder.

“Don’t sweat it, kid,” He grumbles, taking a swig of his beer.

“Pete!”

Peter jumps and whips his head around, catching an eyeful of a grinning Tony. His steps are wobbly as  he walks over to Peter, slinging his arm around the younger’s shoulders. Peter can smell alcohol on Tony’s breath, hinting that he’s turned his pain meter down, leaving him vulnerable to the effects of liquor.

“Is this your new boy toy, Stark?” The man opposite them drawls. His comment makes Peter flush.

“Shut the hell up, Barnes,” Tony laughs, pulling Peter closer to his side. “I take it you met my friend ?”

Peter won’t lie, the word stings. But no one seems to notice, because Barnes just scoffs and rolls his eyes.

“I did not, mind you,” He says before turning to Peter. “I’m Bucky. What’s your name, doll?”

Peter preens at the pet name.

“Peter,” He replies, his hand gently brushing against Tony’s jeans. He feels good like this, he feels like they look good together . “It’s my first time here-fifth time in San Junipero.”

Bucky nods with a soft ‘ah.’

“I see you’ve already gotten caught up with Anthony. Can’t blame you, honestly. He’s a real catch,” He drawls, tucking his free hand into his back pocket. “Well, I’ll leave you alone. My husband’s lookin’ for me.”

Bucky disappears into he crowd.

“Finally, some alone time,” Tony groans, nudging Peter’s chestnut curls with his nose.

“Alone? You think this is alone?” Peter scoffs, pressing his cheek to Tony’s leather jacket. “We’re packed between people right now.”

Tony laughs loud enough that Peter can hear him clearly over the pounding rock music.

“Let’s dance, baby!” He shouts, ignoring the question. Peter giggles and lets Tony shove people out of the way to get on the dance floor. He wraps his arms around Peter’s torso and tucks his face in the crook of the younger’s neck. Peter’s breath hitches as Tony nips at the skin of his neck.

“You’re a good dancer,” He slurs, jerking his hips against Peter’s ass. The brunette’s face is on fire as Tony sways him back and forth to the beat of the music. Peter can feel himself start to chub up in his jeans, much to his embarrassment.

“ Tony ,” He groans, but he doesn’t think he can be heard over the music. Tony continues to rock his crotch against his backside, muttering sweet nothings into his ear. Peter can feel how hard the older man is, and his blood boils at the fact that he did this to him. They stay there for a while, swaying and grinding on each other. The rest of the room becomes a blur as they stand there, intertwined.

“Come to the bathroom with me,” Tony mutters in Peter’s ear; his fingers grazing over the heated skin of the younger’s stomach. “I want your mouth on me.”

A pathetic whine escapes Peter’s lips, and he nods. Tony swerves him around the metalhead party-goers and into a poorly-lit hallway. A couple is making out against the peeling wall,  and Peter keeps his eyes down as Tony leads him into the men’s bathroom.

“Holy shit, I’m so fuckin’ hard,” Tony grunts, fumbling with the handle of one of the stalls. The door swings open with a clang, and Tony ushers him into the stall. Without being prompted, Peter falls to his knees and squeezes Tony’s bulge through his jeans. The older man’s eyes flutter shut and he sighs softly. With nimble fingers, Peter undoes the metal of his belt and tucks his cock out of his jeans. It’s rock hard already, flushed red and leaking. Tentatively, Peter flicks his tongue over the head of his cock. Tony groans, tangling his fingers through Peter’s curls. The younger boy slips his lips around the head, using his tongue to massage under it. A litany of curses falls from Tony’s lips as Peter takes more of his member into his mouth. The stretch makes Peter’s dick jump in his jeans. A spurt of precum leaks onto his tongue, the salty taste making his stomach churn. Peter reaches up and cups Tony’s heavy balls in the palm of his hand. He shouts and yanks Peter’s hair, giving the boy more encouragement to keep sucking. He can’t go too deep, he hasn’t done this much before, but he makes up his lack of experience with enthusiasm. As he lavishes Tony’s cock, the sound of the bathroom door opening makes him freeze.

Tony bites his fist as he cums in Peter’s mouth.

Peter swallows all his release as quietly as he can, tucking the man’s cock back into his boxers and pulling up his jeans. Tony’s chest heaves as he comes down from the high of his climax. Peter’s still unbelievably hard, and he stands up on shaky legs. Tony pulls the boy into his arms and slips his thigh between his legs. Peter moans into Tony’s shirt at the pressure against his crotch.

“Hump my thigh,” Tony growls into Peter’s ear as the other patron flushes the toilet. Peter whines and curls the older man’s shirt in his hands. He does as he’s told, desperately grinding down onto Tony. With his soft words of encouragement, Peter cums in his pants.

“ Tony ,” The brunette cries once the other man leaves the restroom, resting his head against Tony’s chest.

He strokes Peter’s curls and presses a kiss to his cheek.

“I’m so fuckin’ stupid,” Tony grumbles. “You’re gorgeous. And right here in front of me.”

Peter looks up at Tony, confused.

“You’re babbling, handsome,” He mutters, reaching upwards and tracing Tony’s lips with his finger.

“Let me see you,” Tony grumbles, resting his hands on Peter’s hips. “Let me see you in person.”

Peter’s heart skips a beat.

“You could live across the country,” He says softly, running his thumb over the bit of stubble that graces Tony’s cheek.

“But I don’t. You’re Peter Parker and you live in Arcata. I’m in San Fransisco. It’s only a four hour drive.”

“That should be creepy but it’s kind of hot,” Peter mumbles, grazing his lips against Tony’s. “But why?”

“Just let me see you,” Tony pleads, resting his forehead against Peter’s. “Everything-it’s tearing me up inside.”

Peter smiles and bumps his nose against Tony’s.

***

Next Monday -Present Day- 2045

Peter’s room is submerged in darkness, like usual. His legs still ache, but the sharp pain in his ribs has shown up again. He should tell Miss Williams once she comes for his three o’clock checkup. But he’ll have to wait throughout visitation hours, because he needs all the rest he can get. Recently, he’s been way more tired and worn down than usual.

“Peter? Are you awake?”

The man sits up in his bed slowly, rubbing his eyes with his palms. The door to his room is cracked open, and Miss Williams has her head poked inside.

“Yeah,” Peter croaks. “M’awake.”

The lights to his room turn on and Miss Williams opens the door all the way.

“You have a visitor.”

Miss Williams enters his room, a pretty red-head following her and helping a frail old man into the room.

“ Tony? ” Peter whispers as Miss Williams closes the door. Tony smiles, the wrinkles on his face deepening. Peter’s mouth stays parted in awe as the redhead helps Tony over to the chair next to his bed.

“Hi, pumpkin,” The old man says softly, taking Peter’s left hand in his own. His hands are warm and soft and thin, with callouses on every fingertip. “You’re so beautiful.”

Peter looks down at their intertwined hands bashfully. Tony raises Peter’s hand to his lips, and presses a kiss to his pale skin.

“I can stomach your face,” Peter quips; Tony rolls his eyes and chuckles. “Just kidding. You’re a stud.”

They both erupt in a fit of giggles. Peter’s sides hurt, in a good way, for the first time in months.

“Hospice?” Tony asks once they catch their breath, his tone serious. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Miss Williams and the redhead’s conversation awkwardly falls flat. Peter traces one of the small scars on Tony’s left hand with the tip of his finger.

“I didn’t think it mattered,” Peter mumbles, continuing to avoid Tony’s heavy gaze. “It’s not like we’re going to be seeing each other for much longer.”

Tony flinches at the blow his words deliver. Ever so slightly, he squeezes Peter’s hand.

“I’m sorry,” Tony utters, his voice so quiet it’s barely audible. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“Apologizing isn’t going to do much,” Peter chimes, a single tear threatening to slip from his eye. “Not unless you stay.”

“Oh you, there’s no use in crying,” Miss Williams cuts in, grabbing a box of tissues from the small cluster of cabinets in the corner of the room. Peter takes them, taking one tissue out and batting his eyes. “I think you two need to seriously talk. Miss Potts and I will leave you alone.”

Peter gives the two nurses a weak smile as they leave his room.

“I went through all the letters he’s ever written me. Steve-my husband- he really hated the technology,” Tony explains. “I just feel so terrible. I love you Peter, I do, but it’s a disservice to him.”

Peter sucks in a deep breath.

“You love me?” He asks, voice hoarse.

“I’d be crazy if I didn’t,” Tony laughs, stroking the knobby bone of Peter’s wrist. “I’d be so fucking bonkers.”

Peter rolls his big doe eyes, the tips of his eyelashes tickling his eyelids.

“I think you’re already crazy. I think that’s what makes you so charming.”

Tony shakes his head as Peter gives him a kiss on the cheek.

“I think that’s why I’m so in love with you.

***

That Saturday-1992

The glass back door of Tony’s house slides open with a soft ‘woosh’. The wind blowing from the ocean makes goosebumps appear on Peter’s arms, and he pulls his flannel closer to his body. In the distance, the flames of the campfire lick up at the night sky.

Oh, and Tony’s waving his arms like an idiot.

“Peter!” He shouts as loud as he can. “Over here!”

Peter laughs and shakes his head before taking off over the sand, letting the wind rush past him. It’s oddly exhilarating, but he comes to a stop once he reaches Tony and his little camp area.

“My baby,” Tony purrs, wrapping his arms around Peter’s torso and spinning him around. Peter shrieks happily and grips onto Tony’s neck for support. The older man puts him down and immediately presses his lips to Peter’s. Like the roaring fire, Tony’s touch warms him to the core.

“What’s all this?” Peter asks quietly, eyeing the plaid blanket lain on the sand, the wicker basket that holds a bottle of wine, and the bouquet of roses.

“Since we’ve never had a proper date,” Tony explains, brushing a stray curl out of Peter’s eyes. “I thought I’d treat you tonight.”

Tony pulls Peter to the blanket, and the brunette sits down happily. He pushes his bare toes into the sand as Tony sits down next to him. He hands Peter a wine glass and takes one for himself, pouring the red liquid in both.

“And before you ask,” Tony says as he raises his glass to his lips. “My pain meter’s all the way up.”

Peter scoffs and takes a sip of his wine. He’s never been a huge fan of wine, but this-it’s good. His eyes wander to Tony’s face, and he takes a second studying the curves of the man. The point of his nose, the line of his jaw, the pout of his lips.

“Tony?” Peter asks, breaking the silence. The man responds with a soft ‘hm?’

“I died last night.”

Tony doesn’t respond; he just looks up at the stars. Then he turns his head to Peter, and smiles.

“I’m just glad you’re not in pain anymore.”

The tension, that Peter didn’t even realize was there, leaves his body. He rests his head on the older man’s shoulder, his cheek pressed to the softness of Tony’s sweatshirt.

“I’ve been looking for a nice place to live,” Peter rambles, his glass of wine forgotten. “They really have everything here.”

Peter slips two fingers in one of the rips on Tony’s jeans.

“Stay here,” Tony says softly. “This is practically your home now.”

The crashing of the waves echoes in his ears.

“It’s not home without you. It’ll never be home without you here with me.”

Under the moonlight, Tony smiles sadly.

***

Three Months Later-1987

It’s Wednesday when he finds him.

Peter’s browsing the shelves of Paige’s Bookstore, sipping on the rest of his leftover iced tea from lunch. The small shop has been one of Peter’s favorite places since he’s passed over. It’s in a quieter, smaller part of town, and it overlooks the sea perfectly.

Peter’s fingers stop on the spine of a copy of The Picture of Dorian Grey when the bell to the front door chimes softly. The brunette doesn’t pay any attention, and keeps browsing, until he hears the voice of the new customer.

“Good afternoon! Do you sell books here?”

Peter’s heart drops to his toes. He peers around one of the shelves to peek at the front door and-

It’s Tony.

“Tony!” Peter exclaims, failing to contain his excitement. Tony’s egotistical facade drops, and he stands there in awe. Peter, as carefully he can, rushes across the small room, and leaps into Tony’s arms. It feels so good to be back in his arms, encased by warmth and love. Tony presses kiss after kiss onto Peter’s cheeks.

Edith, the owner of the shop, coos at the two of them.

Peter may have spilt his guts to the woman the first time he met her.

“You came,” The younger cries, bubbling with glee. “You actually took the tech.”

Tony laughs and cups both of Peter’s cheeks in his hands.

“I would’ve been a fool if I didn’t,” He mutters, kissing Peter once more.

“Okay lovebirds, if you’re not going to buy anything, get out of my shop.”

Edith has never been the nicest lady.

Peter giggles, though, and bids the woman goodbye as Tony pulls him out of the shop and into the sun. He takes his sunglasses out of his pocket and slips them onto the bridge of his nose.

“I love you,” Peter sings, leaning forward to kiss Tony, but landing on his cheek. “I love you, Tony Stark.”

Ooh, baby, do you know what that's worth?

Ooh, heaven is a place on earth

They say in heaven, love comes first

We'll make heaven a place on earth

Ooh, heaven is a place on earth

Wind in his hair, salt on his lips, and a smile on his face . Tony presses down on the gas, shouting as they fly down one of the backroads of the city. Peter throws his head back and laughs; his sunglasses almost escaping his grasp.

When the night falls down

I wait for you and you come around

And the world's alive with the sound

Of kids on the street outside

“I love you, Peter Parker!” Tony shouts over the wind, honking the horn twice.

When you walk into the room

You pull me close and we start to move

And we're spinning with the stars above

And you lift me up in a wave of love

Tony slows when he reaches a dead end, leaving them atop a small hill. He shuts the car off and sighs, reaching over to squeeze Peter’s thigh.

Ooh, baby, do you know what that's worth?

Ooh, heaven is a place on earth

They say in heaven love comes first

We'll make heaven a place on earth

Ooh, heaven is a place on earth

Leaving over the dashboard, Tony hungrily kisses Peter on the lips. As the sit there making out, under the sun, with the breeze from the ocean, Peter can only think:

They’re going to be just fine.

The End.

[thisonesforfanfic]

Light in the dark (1/?)

Buky x Reader

Author’s Note: This first part is more of an introdutcion to the character. It might just be boring. Also I have no idea on the warnings I should make, please let me know and I will edit it in <3

Summary: You are working as a nurse on an american camp in Italy. Waiting for your brother to come back from a failed mission, you meet Captain America after a failed show he did on the site. 

Word Count: 2.3k

P.S. I was inspired by @webslingingspiderling​, thinking of a prequel to one of their series. I might be going on a differeent direction later, though 

You were desperate to find him, to see him again meant everything to you at that point. Your brother had left for an infiltration mission and no one in the camp had heard anything in days, it didn't take a genius to conclude it meant bad news, you wouldn't allow yourself to lose hope, though. While taking care of some of the wounded that managed to get back, you overheard some of them saying a huge part of the batallion was taken, and were being held captive.

This was meant to be a pleasent surprise, you had asked to be transfered to where Y/B/N's unit was, so you could be with him since you were both serving the country in your own way. He was a great soldier, no doubt, your parents had raised warriors, but you were definitely the best nurse there was with the American troops in Europe.

"Who would have thought" Y/B/N said proudly while putting his hands on your sholder "the kids of an immigrant going off to war to save the country that saved him" It was the first tour for both of you, you were terrified to be separated from him, sad you were not tasked with the enfermary at his battalion

Keeping your head down so Y/B/N couln't see the tears coming "Dad would be very proud of you br-"

"Proud of us!" He quickly cut you off, while putting a stran of your hair behind your ear, then raising your chin to look in your eyes " I might be running of with a gun in my hand, but you are the one that will be keeping us in one piece after all" he cuckles "but in all seriousness, I count on you to patch my ass up"

"Well you better not need it!" you stated, starting to get angry just at the thought of seeing him wounded "I might be good at it, but if you ever need to lay on my hospital beds I will make sure you regret it"

He laughed at your threats, "You know I'll always make it back to you in one piece Y/N"

He'd better.

Pulling you out of your memories, you heard quite a comotion outside of the medical quarters, you stepped outside to see the soldiers rallying around the stage.

"Go watch it!" Megan, one of the few people you would call a friend, whispered to you "You need some distraction right now, you look awful, plus, from all the posters, that captain guy looks like quite the eyecandy" You laughed at her comment, Megan was always trying to pin you up with some handsome soldier, ever since she got married to some airforce big shot she was trying to find you someone on a rank.

You understood her point of view, to her you were alone, not counting on your brother to help you out from now on, she wanted you to be protected, but you didn't want to think about it, and you knew you could fend for yourself if need be.

"Alright mrs. Nurse" you said with a laugh, you liked calling people mr. and mrs. as a sign of respect, even if you knew them on a name basis, especially when it made people a little uneasy. Megan hated it when you called her that way, so you laughed as she stuck her tongue out "I'm going, cover for me, will you?"

"Of couse my mrs. Y/L/N" as she practically pushed you out the door.

---

The whole thing was terrible. That is, he was a good looking guy, and the soldiers loved the girls dancing, but damn, that show was meant to be played anywhere else but here. When Captain America ended his speech, you could see he wanted to burry his face on the ground, the soldiers were mocking him, soon enough they were throwing stuff and calling for the girls to get back onstage.

"Bunch of animals" you whispered to yourself, rolling your eyes as you walked to the back of the poorly established stage, wanting to see if the man was OK after those soldiers' behavior 'it might have been bad, but the man's just doing what he was told' you thought. You quickly spotted the soldier sitting on the steps next to a couple of empty racks.

"Are you alright Mr. Captain?" you approached slowly, trying to make him feel a little better but he barely moved, he was focused on the notebook he had on his hands.

"I'm fine maam, thanks", you could feel in his voice and posture he was pretty sad about the whole thing, but still trying to be as kind and polite as possible. You spotted the circus monkey he had drew, with the same costume he was wearing.

Poor man

"I don't want to be invasive," you continued, wishing to make the man feel better "- but you did probably just present yourself to the thoughest crowd at their thoughest moment this week, so don't be so hard on yourself" you offered the kindest smile you could as you took a seat by his side.

"I was stupid to not have thought that awful speech wouldn't worked here", the soldier finally picked his head up and looked at you "But why would you say this is their thoughest moment miss...?" He was eager to better understand his situation, while still being as polite as he could

"Y/L/N, mr. Captain, but please, call me Y/N".  

"In that case, drop the mr... Call me Steve" he said while offering his hand out.

"Well Mr. Steve" you shook his hand while wearing a grin on your face, making him smile briefly "unfortunately, those guys just lost a lot of companions, they are maybe a quarter of the whole squad that was sent out a couple of days ago" now your voice was starting to shake with the terrible thoughts of what could have happened to Y/B/N.

"I should've thought..." He whispered to himself as you sniffed the tears away

Strugling to put the smile back on you continued "Well, if it makes you feel a little less pessimist, some of the guys I took care of on the medic ward said a great portion of those men are being held captive at a Hydra base.... Although I'm starting to think I will never see Y/B/N ever again" the smile faded with every word that went of your moutht, you couldn't even pretend to be optimist at that moment, your world was falling apart

"Hey miss Y/N, please don't be sad, you'll see your love again" he said, while putting his arms around you trying to console you. You let out a small chuckle with the comment, lifting your head up from your hands to say he was actually your brother. he hugged you thighter, offering a shoulder for you to cry on, but you just let him hold you for a while, it felt nice to have someone, possibly a friend, that understood your pain at that moment.

"This was meant to be a pleasent surprise, you know" you started to tell him as you pulled away from his warm and comforting hug. "These are meant to be my last couple of weeks in service before going back home for a while... You see, since I'm an immigrant nurse, people would hardly ever let me know the location of his battalion, under the belief I could be a spy, so we have barely written eachother" you paused to take a breath before the tears took control of you." When I finally discovered where he was and stated, I asked to be transfered here, to see him, since I don't have a clue when he's going home, and a letter would have taken way too much time. But he- he wasn't here" a few tears streamed down your face before you wiped them away "To my misfortune, his name is on the missing or presumed dead of the 107th"

You saw the Captain's eyes widening "the 107th you said?" He had worry, fear and pain mixed on his glance. You could see the million thoughts racing through your mind, as if you had just shot him in the stomach.

"Yes, Steve" An unfamiliar voice came from behind.

A beautiful brunnette was standing right above the steps you sat on. Despite the confusion in his eyes, you could see she made him feel more comfotable just by being there. You immediatly stood up to leave, but your body wouldn't move another inch. You could tell, judging by her face and uniform she knew at least something about the soldiers.

Quickly galncing at her name stiched on the uniform, you asked "Mrs. Carter, I do not mean to be indelicate, but do you know anything about them?" Your eyes were filling with hope and your heart was beating so fast you could swear both of them could hear it.

"I am sorry my dear, but I am not allow to talk to you about it, you should go tend to the wounded now" She sounded very harsh, but you didn't think much of it, most of your interactions outside of the medic ward ended that way

"yes, of course. Goodbye mrs. Carter, mr. Captain" so you nodded and started heading your way, trying to keep the tears from falling

---

"Her brother is in it Peggy, she's just worried" Steve said as he watched you go wiping your tears "Bucky is on the list as well, isn't he?" turning to Peggy, he had pain, anger, sadness and confusion all mixed up on his eyes, hoping the woman had answers to any of his doubts.

"Unfortunately, I do not know much, but I know who might" She motioned for him to get up as she walked towards the commander's tent

---

The enfermary was awfully quiet, there were not many soldiers for you to help. Most of the injured you tended to had been either estabilized and sent home, or were good enough to get up in a day or two. The few that were still there at the moment were, much like you, waiting for a miracle. No other missions were conducted ever since the disaster that took Y/B/N, so you had little to do there, especially at night. All you could do was look over at those who were sleeping or usually too high on medications to make any sound.

You sat on the edge of a french sargent's bed, changing the blood soaked bandages he had on where his right leg sould be, when you heard footsteps coming closer to you. It was definetly Megan, she would usually come in the middle of the night to check on you, she even transferred with you to Italy because she worried about you not getting any rest, Megan was like the mom you once had.

"Hey Megan, go back to bed, everything's fine", you said, not taking your eyes away from the wounds,

Probably woken up by his screams, those pillows were the worst to muffle the sounds of pain.

"Y/N..." you recognize the soothing voice, still concentrated in your actions you responded.

"I was not expecting to find you coming in mr. Captain, did the british lady already break that heart?" You said in a playful tone.

"Steve, please" He chuckled at your comment, but said nothing else, waiting for you to finish what you were doing.

"Give me a second, I am almost done" He took a seat on the bed opposite to the one you were. Gently covering the wound and closing the bandage, you looked to the sargent with a warm smile "C'est fini". You got to the sink and washed your hands before walking over to Steve, you noticed he was wearing gear, which could only mean one thing, really.

"So, what are you about to do?" you askes while drying your hands on your apron, shaking your head in disbelief. You knew exactly what Steve was up to, you just didn't know how.

"I'm saving them... Peggy has called in a favour and I will be dropped off close enough to their camp"

"You can't be serious, all by yourself? "That plan was nonsense, you both knew it, but you also knew there was barely any other option.

"I don't think I have much of a choice, there might be as much as 400 lives there, and no one else is willing to sacrifice" He was firm with his words, no one was changing his mind at this point. You never thought someone would be crazy or brave enough to do something like that.

"Well in that case...I should to give you something" you pulled your skirt up to take the knife strapped on your leg, but the poor lighting in the room made the captain feel extremely uncomfortable, not understanding what you were doing. "Relax" you chuckled as his cheeks got visibly red, then placing the weapon on both of your hands and offering it out

"Take this, my brother gave it to me for good luck" He was impressed by the bone carved handle and was hesitant to even touch it

"Please" you insisted "I will be right here for you to give it back once you're done, I know it will help you bring them back, it's not a gun, but it is still pretty pointy" you raised your eyebrows, practically waving it at him

Steve took a deep breath "Alright, I'll take it" he walked towards you "for good luck!" You couldn't help but smile at the man you wished to see again very soon. You gave him a peck on the cheek

"Now go, miss Carter is probably going to be jealous of you spending so much time with another girl" You saw his face almost catch fire at the sound of your words. "Good luck Steve, you better come back in one piece and with that knife on your hand"

You smiled as he walked out of the tent, looking back at you for a quick salute, making you laugh a little before going back to checking vitals as your mind drifted to memories.

[procancelled]

It’s Hard To Be A Diamond In A Rhine Stone World 2008

Something I’ve noticed is that the majority of BOTDF songs address the listener instead of a specific person in the song. This is concerning given how sexual the songs are and how young the fanbase is. 

Slash Gash Terror Crew Anthem!

-          Fandom name.

-          Violent

-          Anthem for the fanbase is very sexual despite fanbase is young.

Bend over

Shake those titties

-          Gross and demeaning

Pull over

Hello Kitty

-          This is a FUCKING CHILDREN’S CARTOON CHARACTER!

Back it up like a U-Haul truck

Sock it to me

Rub my junk

-          Anthem for fanbase asks them to do sexual things to Dahvie

You’re a freak… like me!

-          Trying to connect to the audience and make them relate to him

 Save the Rave

You can talk

You stupid tricks

-          Demeaning to people who criticise him or come out with allegations against him

I’ve taken the pills

Giving into cheap thrills

-          Normalising drug use

I fell in love with a girl

At the dance club

She said what! As I’m kicking

Up the party drugs

-          Connecting relationships, ‘love’ and drug use

Shoot up this place

-          Violent

 S My D

-          A whole song dedicated to Dahvie’s oral sex fixation

I’m probably gonna lick

Feel you up until you drip

-          Oral sex fixation and overly sexual

Do you like my sexy hair?

-          Wig, shitty, mouldy, stinky wig.

I’m not wearing any underwear

-          So it’s easier to get your dick out?

-          Also, this is said in a very childish tone instead of trying to sound sexual

S my D

Pop it out like lipstick

-          Childish sounding when referring to his oral sex fixation

Take the bottles, pop ‘em out

-          Connecting alcohol with sex

Gimme gimme more on the dance floor

-          Sex in public, exhibitionism

Turn around, what the hell

Go real fast, break it down

Do it ‘til you touch the ground

Want it slick, want it sure?

-          Fast semi-violent sex

Bitch I know you want some more

-          Disrespectful and also sounds very rapey

So open me up like Christmas

-          Childish sounding which is very gross

S my D motherfuckin’ bitches

-          Disrespectful and demeaning

Suck it good

Suck it hard

Suck it right

-          Demanding

-          Oral sex fixation

-          If you want good oral sex then maybe you shouldn’t try to get oral sex from underage virgins, most of which don’t know or understand oral sex

 Ima Monster (Heart On My Sleeve)

-          Yes you are

I’m banging with the b-o—t-o-dizzle

With wiffles

-          What the fuck does this mean?

‘Cause I dribble like I’m rubbing on nipples

-          Obsession with breasts

-          Why would rubbing nipples make him dribble so much? He’s not seen boobs for the first time, he’s an adult

Gotta get out the pickle

-          Childish sounding and gross

Make it rain with the ripples

Let my candy rum trickle

-          Linking alcohol and sex

Get you buzzed with double triples

Getting head, in rentals

-          Oral sex fixation

-          Car sex again

Avoiding the parentals

-          Why would adults need to avoid parents? Because an adult should be having sex/a relationship with an adult so parents aren’t an issue right? Unless this is actually because he is avoiding parents because he intents to pursue a minor

They be hatin’ us

Cause we glamourous

They be hatin’ us

Cause I’m fabulous

-          Uses things like jealousy as the only reason he/the band are hated

 Can’t stop me once I’ve started

-          Sounds rapey as fuck

Baby got me retarded

-          Slur

Chop, chop, chop you up

-          Violent

Eat you like a cannibal

Spit you like an animal

-          Violent

-          Dismissive, uncaring and disrespectful

Slice, slice, slice you up

Cut you up, I’ll slice and dice

-          Violent

Serve you up as cold as ice

-          Gloating

Go ‘head girl, shake that butt

Make me freaking bust a nut

-          Overly sexual

-          Objectifying

Let’s get wasted, super UHW

Guess what honey, I’m a freak

I’m a freak, inside the sheets

-          Links alcohol and sex

-          Saying he’s a ‘freak’ is reminiscent of how he uses BDSM as an excuse

Rough, tough, naughty nurse

Rip it up, make it hurt

-          Normalising rough sex to a young audience that doesn’t know much about sex

-          Telling fans what he likes and what he’s like (supposedly) sexually

Don’t stop, get it, get it

Last for hours, not for minutes

-          Demanding

-          Yeah as if you could Dahvie

Open wide for my surprise

-          Oral sex fixation

Scratch and blow for your grand prize

Smear it on your plastic face

-          Rude

-          Marking who he’s with sexually

Leave you with a sweeter taste

-          He has told girls that his cum tastes like ice cream, young girls.

Super soaker on your chest

Let it drip down on your breasts

-          Breast obsession

-          At shows he would pour drinks on girls chests. He would also spit on them, mainly whichever girl he decided he wanted to have sex with

Haters make me famous

-          He indoctrinates his fans to think this way so whenever they see people criticise him or talk about what he did to them they will just replay that their ‘hate’ is just making Dahvie more famous

-          They aren’t haters and Dahvie is famous for all the wrong reasons

 It’s Hard To Be A Diamond In A Rhine Stone World

Slash Gash Terror what?

Slash Gash Terror who?

Slash Gash Party Crew

-          Violent name for fanbase

You know how we fucking do

-          Telling fanbase how to act

Pull over, that ass is so phat

You makin’ me clap

-          Overly sexual and demeaning

I don’t know how to act

-          He really doesn’t

I do it in the front

I do it in the back

Shake it down like that

Make that booty go clap

-          Overly sexual while sounding childish and not sexy in any way

Can’t knock it, I’m profit

-          Money obsession

-          Uses money and parents connect to the cops in his area to get out of any repercussions

I got paper to chase

I got money to make

-          By scamming fans

Squish, squish on your chest

-          Childish sounding

Rub those titties, super breast

-          Ah yes, one single super breast, the other one is mediocre

-          Breast obsession

Ah, ah lost my breath

Ultra sex you’re the best

-          Overly sexual

I’m packing

-          Doubt

I’m stacking

Some rated x action

Strawberry whip cream

We can be a sweet team

Bang bang choo choo train

Show me how you work that thing

-          Childish sounding while being overly sexual

This is how we fucking do

In the Slash Gash Terror Crew

-          Addressing fans

-          Telling fans how to act

 Keys To The Bakery

Haters block

-          ‘Haters’ = valid critics

-          Ironic since he blocks anyone who comments on his posts with the allegations against him

And snitches rock

-          Does he mean rock in some kind of bad way?

-          He calls anyone who confesses what he did to them as a snitch to make it sound bad so his fans go after them

Yo pass me the cup

I’ll drink till

I throw up

-          Unhealthy behaviour being normalised to a fanbase where the majority can’t legally buy alcohol

I get you wetter than Hurricane Katrina

-          Hurricane Katrina happened in 2005, three years before this album came out. People were still suffering.

-          Hurricane Katrina caused 1,200 deaths and $125 billion in damages

-          This line is said eight times in this song

Cuddle leads to trouble

When you’re up in my bubble

-          Sounds incredibly rapey

I don’t chase em

I replace em

-          It has been reported that over 100 people have reached out with stories about how they have been hurt by Dahvie

-          If Dahvie couldn’t get what he wanted from someone he would stop contacting them

-          He would also stop contact if he felt at risk of being exposed

Stackin’ hoes

Like dominoes

-          Disrespectful

Make a rumour

-          Constantly calls the allegations ‘rumours’ so they seem less valid, especially to people who don’t look into them further

Sense of humour

-          Nothing about rape or paedophilia is funny

Entertain with my life

Make me popular over night

To be famous is so nice

-          Acts as if the allegations just gain him fame. He is the literal embodiment of ‘HaTeRZ MaKE mE FaMOUs’

Reeses pieces butter cup

-          Random and childish sounding

Mess with me

I’ll fuck you up

-          Threatening violence

-          Many victims have said he is a violent person

This is how we party up

-          Saying the way he acts is normal

She licked it like a lolli pop

-          Childish sounding

-          Oral sex fixation

Don’t stop till you hit the spot

-          Demanding

You got me crazy or maybe

Get smashed

-          Linking sex and alcohol

I can’t stop

Till I pop

-          Sounds rapey

-          Only cares if he gets off, doesn’t care about the other person

There’s danger on the spot

-          Dahvie is the danger

Got money in my hands

Mad dough! Cash flow

Got the diamonds that glow

We be popin’ Champaign

Like we won the damn game

-          Obsession with being rich and flaunting that

-          He hasn’t got anything now. He’s poor and lives with his parents

Mosh and Roll!

When I step in the club

Everybody shows me love

-          No they don’t

-          And now some places, not just clubs, won’t let him in

I’m in the business of terror

-          Being honest there

More metal than Slayer

-          HA! HA! HA!

-          THE FUCK!?!?!?!?

I got money and hoes

-          Demeaning

In different area codes

-          Has victimised women in many states and even different countries

Cause haters make me famous

-          This stupid narrative again

But love will make you shameless

-          Dahvie doesn’t understand love and he also should feel shame

I’ll slash, gash this party bash

-          Violent

Gotta get that money cash

-          By scamming?

Up and down with no breaks

We as in, I’ll make you shake

-          Gross and overly sexual

We’re gonna burn this town

To the ground

-          Violent

I’m not a trend sweater

I’m a trend setter

-          This is an actual line that is spoken

Girl you better pop an umbrella cause

You’re making me wet drip, drip

I gotta get that lick

-          Oral sex fixation

For the centre of the tootsie pop

-          Childish sounding

You know I can’t stop

-          Sounds rapey

Shank you with my bling brass

-          Violent

Stacking up on my money cash

-          Obsession about money

 Do You Want To Be A Superstar?

Ummm… Mic check…

One… Two… Um… Fucking twelve

-          Again this is an actual line that is spoken

My fashion is so siq

-          He dresses the way he does so he looks younger

My fashion will make you lick

-          Oral sex fixation

Watch those panties fucking drip

-          Gross and overly sexual

Scene hair weave

-          Scene hair wig you mean

Scene attitude so fucking mean

-          Acts like being mean is okay and normal because of being part of a certain ‘culture’

Get on the floor

Get on the whore

-          Demanding and demeaning

Pull down your pants and drop your drows

-          Demanding

(Like Oh My God Dahvie you’re so obscene)

-          Acts like everything he does is just because he’s ‘obscene’ which is like him saying that how he treats women while he forces himself on them is BDSM

Bitch I’m the motherfucking war machine

-          Violent

Don’t give a fuck just bust your grill

-          Doesn’t care about being violent

Throw them hoes

-          Demeaning and dismissive

Throw these motherfuckers who get too close

-          Violent

Porn star bash

Porn star splash

-          Porn obsession

My porn star cash

-          Dahvie isn’t a porn star

Pretty damn stoned

-          Linking drugs and sex

Pretty fucked up? Yeah I know

-          Acts like everything he does is a big deal

Do you wanna be a super star?

Get fucked up and go real far?

-          Acts like if you’re famous you are going to get ‘fucked up’

Or do you want to be a porn star?

Fuck for money and go real far

-          Demeaning sex work

Wet from dreams

Wet from screams

Wet from sex and dripping with cream

-          Overly sexual

HOT HOT SEX!

HOT HOT BREASTS!

HOT WHITE TIGHT SHIRTS

BUSTING OUT YOU’RE CHEST

Double D titties

Double D pretties

-          Obsession with breasts

-          Objectifying women

Girl got them thighs

You’re pretty damn fine

-          Objectifying

I don’t give a fuck what I say

I don’t give a fuck I do it everyday

-          He literally doesn’t care as long as he gets away with what he does

Yes I’m different

Yet I’m unique

-          ‘Uwu I’m not like other predators’

Mess with me

I’ll grind you like meat

-          Threatening violence

Let’s get wasted, super fucked

Go head girl shake that butt

-          Childish sounding

-          Linking sex with alcohol

(Let’s get wasted)

Make me fucking bust a nut

-          Demanding

 Wet Dream War Machine

Operation get crunk, I'm in love with your trunk

-          Combines sex, alcohol and ‘love’

Get me fucking love drunk, baby girl I want

Drugged up like party monster, sexed up so grab the condoms

-          Links drugs and sex

Boom, Boom, Boom

In my hotel room

-          Raped underage girls in his hotel rooms while touring or would book a hotel room to take underage girls to

I'm the teenage bloody dream

-          ‘Bloody’ is he trying to be British or violent

-          He isn’t a teen and also shouldn’t be encouraging teens to want to be with him

Everybody fuck me

-          No

Getcha drink on

Take your clothes off

Let’s get down and dirty

-          Normalising drunk sex

-          Demeaning

 Mad Rad Hair

-          You mean wig

I'm fenny not a faggot!

-          Slur

With extensions so thick

-          It’s a wig not just extensions

You can suck my dick

-          Oral sex fixation

So get in my chair

Let me pimp your hair

-          Used cutting hair as a way to spend time with underage girls. Arrived at a time when the parents would have to go to work so he could be alone with the underage girl

-          He couldn’t cut hair. He called himself Dahvie The Elite Hair God on MySpace but he had not talent. I would think it’s the same with makeup. During this time his makeup wasn’t very heavy. It was only when Jayy joined the band and the band was more successful that his makeup got more extreme since he could afford a makeup artist, and Jayy actually can do makeup.

Let’s get wasted super fucked

-          Alcohol reference

My hair is better than yours

-          IT’S A WIG!

So just fuck me on the dance floor

-          Demanding

-          Exhibitionist

Everybody gettin' tense

Feeling up my body

-          Overly sexual

I love this filthy

Life to get CRUNK ALL NIGHT!

-          Linking alcohol and sex

My hair’s looking so tight

-          WIG!

In case you didn't know

I'm a really big deal

-          He wasn’t overly famous outside of MySpace at this point

So shut the fuck up

-          Demanding and disrespectful

And take your clothes off

-          Using fame to get people to have sex with him

Come' a MySpace whore

-          Demeaning

-          Telling his fans the kind of person he’s interested in

-          Being scene was a way for him to look younger and prey on young girls

Change your name to

XXGORE

-          He gave some of his victims their MySpace name

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales: Challenge of the Senior Junior Woodchucks! and Quack Pack! Review/Thoughts

Hello errybody, I’ve decided being a huge fan of this verison of Ducktales, and someone who likes reviewing stuff and going on and on at length about it, to review this season’s episodes as they come out, both to get me writing critically again, and to get more non chat content on the old tumblr.  First, while you likely don’t care a little about my history with the ducks; While I , sadly though i’m trying to correct it, haven’t read MUCH of Carl Barks classic donald duck comics nor that of his avid fanboy and clear sucessor in quality and talent Don Rosa, I did read Rosa’s utter classic “The LIfe and Times of Scrooge” mcduck in high school and the story stuck with me sense. I’ll go into Life and Times another day hopefully, but naturally when the reboot was announced I was excited.. a great voice cast, and donald,my boy, as part of the main cast. The show has been a joy to behold and with steven universe having taken a bow JUST a week ago and Covid ravaging our lives, it coudln’t of picked a better time. But do these episodes keep the momentum from an utterly marvelous second half of season 2? The short answer is “Fuck yes” but the long answer is under the cut. 

Challenge of the Junior Senior Woodchucks! While “Challenge of the x” is a popular snowclone title I can’t help but think of superfriends with the title... or now I thought of it shortly before writing this, hearing “Meanwhile at the legion of doom” when they cut to fowl.. or rather “Meanwhile at FOWL” but in that same announcers voice. I”m a dork, that should be obvious But I was hyped for both episodes: Violet is a faviorite mine, I ship her with huey so them interacting for the first time was wonderful to me, and.. okay the subplot didn’t hook me and we’ll get to that, but we had her dads and one of my other faviorites (I have several, get used to it now) , Lena , at least putting in an apperance. And honestly.. the main plot lived up to it. As I said I didn’t really dig the sub plot, more on that in a second, but I REALLY enjoyed this. From the begining Huey was my faviorite of the three triplets, easily, as it’s fairly easy for me a grown ass dork with anxiety, self confidence, anger issues, depression and constant self doubt, to relate to a little duck with the same and I’ve loved Danny Pudi since community, so naturally I was excited for his turn for a spotlight season.  And again the show didn’t disapoint.. Huey has a rather decent arc with some unexpected turns: First unexpectly, the trailer lied as while Huey and Violet look ultra competiive, theirs no real confilct..s econds after that bit the two shake hands (after a good 20 seconds of adorable and hilarous failure to do so that fits both like a glove.), and try to be good sports. The problem is instead internal: As Huey muses to his siblings (Webby very much included, getting her own great bit of encouraging Huey while also assuring Violet she’s also great he just needs it more, which is accurate) “If i’m not hte best junior woodchuck who am I”. Like Louie last season towards the begining (when he didn’t have a clear purpose in their adventuring dynamic) and towards the end (When della nearly took it away from him), he’s nothing without his sense of who he is. It’s easily why he’s the one to comfort him when his other siblings are either torn between two friends or you know, Dewey. Louie knows what it’s like to be rattled about who you are.  And WHY Violet outclassing him rattles him so much is intreating and to me makes a ton of sense: Huey’s identity to me is so wrapped in his intellegence and woodchuckery because , besides being oldest, it’s what he HAS on his brothers. When you think about it, Louie is the charmer, Dewey is charsmaticin his own way and loves hogging attention not to mention being fairly athletic... to stand out Huey NEEDS his brains to be the one with facts, and plans and his book.  He may not be the first on the front lines but he’s the first to solve a trap or figure out where they are if scrooge or his mom hasn’t already.. and if someone’s markdely better at that, and worse in an activity that’s wholy his own and now it’s been revealed impmortant to his mom.. just who is he.  The poor kid simply breaks down at the thought and takes bigger and stupider risks, which is sad to watch.. and thankfully lightned by his delightful mental brekadown in the form of the stephen root voiced JW Guidebook, a talking hallucination who gives huey his knowledge and edge back in the contest.. but it’s STILL not enough. And that’s when the other intresting bit comes into play: Huey.. has a moment of weakness. Despite the guidebook saying to always save your fellow woodchucks when violet gets stuck slipping in a tree.. he does nothing and leaves, despite JW  , whose now become his concious, begging him not to. It’s a sad, well done moment, and one that makes the story richer. Naturally violet escapes and when huey falls off the lava bridge to the finish line in a nother moment of desperation, and after a returning JW burns because apparently ducks and sabrewings are fireproof but imaginary manfestations of knowledge arne’t, she saves him... and is a good friend and woodchuck in NOT chastizing huey for his moment of weakness earlier, but comforting him, revealing she’s tried three times before and adding some more depth to her character: Despite her awkardness with people, she’s a kind, caring person, and gives Huey the lesson he needs: faliure, and the ocasional bout of moral weakness, is okay.. what matters is you learn from it, dust yourself off and keep going. Huey bows out due to this, as while violet is more than willing to let him pass with her, Huey knows he hasn’t earned it, yet, but he can keep trying and that this is her moment, not his. And in that, I feel learns that he dosen’t NEED recognition to be his best self.. he just needs to be a good person and a good woodchuk. I’ts a damn fine story and despite not being the intended premire, works as a great one.. mostly. And also yes I ship them.. as much as two ten-elven year olds can be, but they are adorable and geninley have a good repore.  And before I get to the dispaointing subplot, i’d be an idiot if I left out Violet’s family: We meet her dads, hilariously wearing shirts that say i’m with dad which is also really fucking adorable, and have our first onscreen conformation that Lena’s now her adopted sister, with Lena loudly screaming it in one of the best lines of the episode.. it’s clever to me: it over the top makes sure that we know yes, these men are gay and her parents.. but in a needed way given disney’s tendncy to dance around that or loudly proclaim a minor character no one cares about is gay in a way they can edit out. It’s a great step forward for the channel and the company and good on the crew for going ahead with it and good on disney for not beign dumb about it, nor, like again they have a bad habit of doing, loudly shouting about it to the media. Excellent work. 

Now i’m done rambling about Huey’s psyche and america’s new faviorite gay couple, I gotta get the suplot out of the way: while the whiporwill is freaking adorable as is dewey’s bond with it, otherwise this plot is.. really damn weak: it has some good jokes (Louie’s blunt no when Scrooge asks if hte family wants to fight a bear, Webby’s disapointment when she finds their not walking in the path of literal giants, Donald’s runner with the spy drone mosquito (and Della’s instiance to just let it suck his blood), and Della proving she has the family temper with her own donald brand angry dance) it’s just.. not enoguh. It feels like it’s an oblogiatory plto for the family and while it does set up the season’s overaching plot with a strong character, as it’s intresting learning that Scrooge had an idol at adventuring and thus is following a legacy himself, overall the subplot itself is just there and distracting from the much more intresting A-Story. That being said it was at least sorta worth it for the ending bit where huey and violet suprisingly find launchpad at the end of the trial in a cave.. as do the duckfamily, both groups crying out “Launchpad?!” with launchpad giving out a hilarious “that’s me, i’m launchpad” and while the setup for it was weak, the idea of the family going around the globe to find missing mysteries wile fighting fowl over them is a great concept. Overall a really damn strong start to the season with a weak b-plot and i’m gald even if this isn’t what htey planned to start with it’s what they went with.  Quack Pack: Quack Pack.. is one of disney’s secret shames.. I mean it’s not SO secret as it’s on D+ while this show’s predecessor wonder over yonder and superhero fantasy classic american dragon jake long are not for reasons I sitll don’t get, but that’s a rant for another day. It clashed badly with ducktlaes,was meiocre most of the time (It helps the two episodes I did watch were donald focused as he, a nicely redeisgned dasiy, and their co-worker kent were the highlights), with the boys somehow being more obnoxious than they were at their worst in the original ducktales.  Now that’s off my chest the episode itself.. is really damn good and a nice take on sitcom parody, with the family getting ready for a photo. Dewey’s “since the internet” line in paticular killed because, having watched boths ome of the best sitcoms (roseanne, designing women) and some of the absolute worst (My wife and kids, last man standing,home imporvment etc), most modern ones i’ve seen, even the good ones, have kids written this terrible way. Otherwise though it was highly enjoyable and having Jaleel “Urkel/Sonic the Hedgehog” white here to take the piss out of his former genre as Gene (and doing such a great job I really want to see Gene back next season), is the icing. That and Huey going half insane trying to figure out what’s going on, as well as the unsettling reveal of the studio audience.  Really the ep is a laugh fest, as well as the glorious arrival of goofy who to my relief, wasn’t a hallucination.. which itself is a great gag as is the offscreen internal thought of “okay so now htey ahve to take goofy with them on this deadly adventure all the way back to the states?”. The using of the adults old designs, as well as having dewey do the triplets dance and wear an outfit similar to theirs from “Mr Duck Steps Out” (Which I saw earlier this year and other than daisy’s horrifying early voice it wasn’t half bad). It’s just hard to go into and throughly enjoyable. But analysis right the real meat is in my boy donald: Going into the ep I genuinely expected Dewey to be the obvious source of the wish: while knowing gene was involved meant it was easy to see it was his fault HOW was a good question.. but having Donald do so and throughly enjoyable, and naturally gives us two great gags int he rwo: Donald’s VERY donald response “I wish for that 6 times a day! how wsas I supposed to know I was rubbing up against a magical lamp” and everyone spouting off their catcphrases, all either actual ones, basically something she does all the time turned into one (della) or poor beakly who gets “i’m not a spy” for some reason an dis cross about it. But the fact Donald not only figured it out quickly but wants to stay.. is perfectly in character. Donald in general, and especailly here, dosen’t WANT to be an adventuer anymore: he does it for his family, but he’d probably perfer the tgif lifestyle where problems are minor and solved with heartwarming lessons.. not full of lingering restiments, damage you caused, or loosing a decade of your sisters life and having to struggle to care for her kids. The rest of the familys looks when he gives his reasoning say it all: they really get why he wants this.. but Huey, who nicely got to be the one to break the sitcom news to them on top of everything else, makes an even better one: their lives are who they are.. this.. isn’t real. LIkea tgif sitcom it’s a plastic imitation of life that’s nothing like it: it’s comforting sure since hte real world is fucking complicated and miserable at times.. but hiding from it dosen’t fix things.  And while Donald, of course angrily denies this while his family ends upf ighting the studio audience, it’s Goofy, loveable guest star and everyone’s other faviorite dad, who gets his friend to see the truth: eveyr family has thieir own normal. He and max are  widower and his kid. Just a family of three (I”m counting PJ since , by his tene years at least, Peg is missing, though Iw ish she’d come back as her and goofy would be cute and she deserves better than Pete but whatever, and his dad is an emotionally abusive douchehead). But their happy, they make memories even if goofy like donald can’t walk five feet without the universe, and that’s what counts> it’s a touching sentiment and i’m happy Donald now has a friend whose also a parent and probably made similar sacrifices, and some Donald hasn’t had to just yet and probably won’t now dellas back, but made it through. So donald helps his family fight the  humanoids, take sa picture and it’s just a genuinely sweet ending... a great episode with a great concept that also opens the door for the return of the world’s other best dad more times. And again I want to see him smooch pete’s ex wife. This is the hill I will die on apaprently.. and with that I leave you. it was a good start a fun thing ot dive into and I hope for more.. oh and before I go, while i’m not a GIANT max and roxanne shipper, Idon’t dislike the ship I just don’t hav ea large attachment, it was absolutley WONDERFUL to see that they went to prom together. Okay i’m done, until next week, courage and stay safe. 

[absolutepokemontrash]

The Brothers and Side Characters Play Ticket To Ride

Guess who just had a family game night and decided this would be a good idea? Meeeeee!

Last Minute Road/Track Buyer (Lucifer)

This smug son of a bitch doesn’t even complete his trip cards. He just amasses a massive deck of cards and then buys all of the five and six roads, effectively messing up everyone’s strategies.

Luci would have a good poker face if it weren’t for how giddy he gets when he sees the hope drain from his opponents faces as he takes the coveted fifteen point six road.

His main colour is black because he’s an emo bitch.

Lucifer can and Lucifer will take that two road you need to connect your trains, thus ruining everyone’s lives.

He basks in the chaos and rage like a god before Beel tells him that he’s eaten all the game night chips.

He’ll win sometimes, but his lack of trip cards will often be his downfall. Lucifer is just here to fuck everyone over.

FUCK YOU! DON’T YOU DARE TAKE THAT CARD- (Mammon)

Mammon’s greedy little heart sank when he heard that Monopoly had been passed over for family game night, but he caught onto the rules of Ticket to Ride very quickly.

Being the gambler he is, Mammon’s poker face is completely god-tier… except when he has all the cards needed to make his road or someone else takes the cards he needs.

Levi is often the main culprit and fights have started over this.

He argues with the rules a lot if he thinks they’re stupid, this gives Satan a migraine.

Mammon doesn’t save his cards, the moment he has all the ones he needs, he’s buying his road, which is good at the beginning, but often leads to him ending up with no cards by the end.

He is SO insufferable when he wins, please beat him so we don’t have to hear him gloat like an asshole.

Rule-Whore (Leviathan)

“That’s against the rules!” “You can’t have more than three wild cards in the draw pile!” “You need to take three trip cards!”

…so annoying…

Levi is such a rule whore he’ll try and take the instructions from Satan, which will usually result in Levi getting socked in the jaw.

He mains blue because obviously.

Levi tends to plan out his route ahead of time, but he makes it too obvious and his roads end up getting sniped, thus rendering all the cards he had amassed completely useless.

He gets super iffy about his trains being in perfect formation both on and off the board.

Beat his ass for being annoying.

Ha! I’ve Planned for This- Aw Fuck…(Satan)

You fool, you stupid human, Satan had planned out his route ten years before the first turn even happened!

All he has to do now is- DID LUCIFER JUST SNIPE HIS FUCKING ROAD?!

…he’s cool, he’s calm. He can work around this. Satan just has to get the cards he needs- SON OF A BITCH MAMMON WHY’D YOU TAKE BOTH THE ORANGES?!

Worried about your asshole fellow players not giving you your points? Fret not, Satan has everyone’s points memorized and will adjust accordingly. He’s winning this fair and square.

Satan manages to win pretty frequently solely because he picks up so many trip cards and completes a good chunk of them.

Satan mains green because I said so.

Annoying Spectator (Asmodeus)

For the love of God Asmo, you aren’t even playing! Shut up and go away!

He leans over people’s shoulders and criticizes their choices like the world’s most annoying guardian angel… or demon.

“Pick up red.” “Asmo, piss off.” “I’m just trying to help, Belphie! Look, Mammon’s gone and taken your road!” “I DIDN’T EVEN NEED THAT ONE!”

When Asmo does play, he doesn’t play well at all, he just has the worst luck with cards and has the worst poker face.

If someone just took a card that Asmo needed, they are going to get glared at from across the table.

Almost never wins, but when he does, he’s INSUFFERABLE.

“It’s so nice to have the family together :)” (Beel)

Sweet man is just happy everyone’s together, he’s also happy about the multiple party size bags of chips that are on the table.

Beel builds his roads from point A to point B, no fancy skipping or strategies. This often serves him quite well because he can just shift where he’s going on the fly.

Though, he does get confused on where some of the locations are, he’ll end up accidentally cheating and looking at people’s cards when he leans over to see the whole board to try and find out where TF he’s going.

He tries to complete every trip card he has, and he mostly succeeds at that, buuuuut he never thinks to pick up more, which is his downfall.

He mains red, because Duh.

Overall, Beel’s a surprisingly formidable opponent, his resting bitch face serves him well.

“*Snrk* H-huh? What the fuck… what’d I knock over? Where am I? Whose turn is it?” (Belphie)

This little shit- THIS LITTLE BASTARD FUCKS EVERYTHING UP. He falls asleep and when anyone wakes him up for his turn, he “accidentally” knocks everyone’s trains off the board.

He’s doing terribly. Don’t help him.

Belphie loses motivation the moment someone ruins his carefully formulated plan, and making a new one’s too much work so… *snore*

He takes what he can get with the trip cards, he’ll complete the smaller ones and kind of eyeball the big ones and make it up as he goes along if everything goes to shit.

If Belphie gets bored, he’ll purposefully break the rules just to piss of Levi and Satan. He’s a little goblin…

Belphie wins when he puts the work in… which is never.

…Wait what? (Diavolo)

Diavolo is literally the worst at this game at first. He’s picking up two wild cards when he’s not supposed to, he’s buying roads when it’s not his turn, he somehow messed up the points, ugh…

He gets really confused about the rules, he’ll often interrupt people mid-turn to ask a question that spirals into a long explanation.

But when he finally understands the game… May the demon king have mercy on your souls…

He goes from zero to hero and crushes everyone without fail.

It doesn’t matter if he had shitty luck in the beginning because he’s come back to completely ruin your entire route.

Oh, Solomon needed that road? Too bad. It belongs to Diavolo now. Give him his fucking points.

Peace between the realms can wait, he’s got noobs to pwn.

The Wise Mentor (Barbatos)

Barbatos can see the future, he’s cheating by default.

When he sort of… turns off his powers, people still think he’s cheating because he’s just that good at guessing where people need to go and crushing their hopes and dreams.

Except for Luke. Barbatos is teaching him how to be as brutal a player as he is. He will not crush Luke.

As good a player as Barbatos is, one bad trip card will crush his entire strategy. This may be the one time you hear him swear.

It’s a very quiet “son of a bitch..”

Cheater. Asshole. Fight instigator. (Solomon)

Okay who the fuck invited this guy?

Better question, who the fuck let him be in charge of the cards?

Solomon cheats and lies about it, all with a smile on his face. Think you caught him? No you didn’t.

He peeks at cards before he grabs them, gives people the worst possible ones for what they’re doing, AND he gets potato chip grease all over the cards!

When he’s no my allowed to cheat, Solomon’s only half decent at the game overall. Luck is usually on his side, but sometimes luck isn’t enough.

0/10 kick his shifty ass out.

“No, stop,” *Pulls out popcorn* “Don’t fight, oh no.” (Simeon)

Fucking Simeon… he sits back and watches the fight even though he knows he can stop it.

When he’s playing the actual game, he’s pretty average, but when he gets on a roll, oh boy…

He doesn’t snipe roads on purpose, but he’s gotta get where he’s going. Sorry not sorry, may the good lord bless your loser ass.

Sexy shoulder-man’s poker face isn’t anything special, it’s 5/7 overall.

Simeon’s fatal flaw is that he picks up cards only when he needs them, he doesn’t plan ahead, so it’s super easy to swipe the cards he needs before his turn.

He is nice enough to move everyone’s points for them^.^ so he’s better than the rest of those dirty sinners.

“NO PLEASE I NEED THAT ROAD-” (Luke)

So you know how everyone is an awful person? This is proven whenever the gang plays Ticket to Ride with Luke.

Luke demands/begs that no one takes the roads he needs and almost no one listens.

It’s heartbreaking to watch please give the little angel a hug.

But listen, listen, after a bit, Luke gets scary good at the game and very close to winning. His little victory dance is so fucking cute 10/10.

But oh my… it appears that Luke has one tiny road he needs to connect his trains… it would be a shame if Lucifer just… took that.

Luke gets petty, he just puts his hand over the spot and refuses to move it. This goes on for like five minutes until Levi brings up that it’s not even Lucifer’s turn.

Gasp! Hope! It’s Solomon’s turn- HE TOOK THE FUCKING ROAD.

…betrayal.

Luke’s moving out. He can’t go back to Purgatory Hall. He’s going to become the little Victorian street urchin he was destined to become. He is packing his little rucksack and fleeing from this household.

————

I love family game nights… all of you should get together with your family and your squad and break out some board games. Just not Monopoly. Anything but Monopoly…

[your-localghost]

so um who wants to read a 50 page essay of me and my mom's journey through the IT movies?

too bad you're reading it

so like i saw this goddamm clown, and i, also being a clown, said to my mom, also a clown, "lets watch this clown movie lol" and she said yes. and in the like first five minutes we are already awwing and stuff because??? omg georgie and bill are so cu- oh. oh my god. oh this us not what we thought at all-

so enter Losers. instant RELATE i am also a LOSER hellO?? hAh look at these 2 idiots theyre bickering like an old couple an- oh my fucking GOD of course there are bullies. one of them looks like draco malfoy??? guYs did draco malfoy play in this movie we see him like 2 times-

oh my god oh no poor bill he is trying to find his brother :( but alsO BEV IS SO PRETTY??? IM SO GAY???? and yeah i really feel the New Kid On The Block like same man i didnt even get to meet a pretty girl and a buncho losers who will go jump into lakes with me

OH and the lake scene? it bites me in the ass later. i fucking passed it off as a "theyre bonding" moment and then it transforms into a feelings plane and crashes into my house

--

me: they just keep leaving their bikes

mom: well It takes kids, not bikes

--

fastforward and??? the fight secene?? the fuckijgn fi Ght SCE ne??? o H M Y GO D

bill was so desperate to find georgie?? richie was so scared he would die??? beN BEING SCARED HIS FRIENDS ARE GONE?

i AM ALL OF THESE FUCKERS

and oh?? bev's dad??? hate the vibe this dude gives to me. like this dude def did more than mentally abuse her and im so glad she beat him up

uhHHH??? WHY DOES NO ONE TALK ABOUT EDDIE STANDING UP TO HIS FREAKSHOW OF A MOM??? HOW HE WAS SO MAD????? HE THREW HIS PILLS ON THE GROUND HELLO, HE STRAIGHT UP YEETED HIS FANNY PACK??? MAN the things a gay goes through for his friends

bill's speech on georgie, like, dude just fucking stab me it will hurt way less

fastforward more, the oath??? how scared stan was??? like i ddint really feel any connection with stan other than his actor played my fav character, stan, in ianowt, but uHm? i still love him??? so mUCH???

oOOOH i just realied i didnt talk about mikey

ahem

THE ROCK FIGHT THE FUKING ROCK FIGHT THE ROCK FIGHT OH MY GOD

THESE LOSERS ARE SCARED SHITLESS OF THOSE SHITBAGS BUT THEY SEE ANOTHER LOSER AND THE FIRST THING THEY DO IS THROW R O C K LIKE FUCK YEAH YOU FUCNKY LITTLE MIDDLE SCHOOLERS STAND UP FOR YOUR FELLOW BULLIED I LOVE MIKEY SO M7CH OH MY GOD

__

so between the 2 movies we realized it wasnt on netflix and went on various websites to watch the 2nd movie, got progressively angrier until i got my laptop and just watched it blindly because we are both blind

--

okay heres the tea yall

they completely erased bev's character in the 2nd movie. in the first it was emphesized SO MUCH just how brave she was compared to the others. she took the first step, she wasnt afraid to go into the house she fought her abusive dad and in the 2nd movie it was all gone. i really liked the fact that bev wqsnt a damsel in distress until in the 2nd movie she was. while in the 1st movue you forgot that gender roles existed in the 2nd it really seemed like they wrote bev as a "woman" rather than "bev" you dig me??? okay rant over. basically fuck the 2nd movie bev and im not just saying this because her 1st movie actor made me realize i was a lesbian. on to the movie

oh mY GOD HOMOSEXUALS??? WILL THEY HAVE A PART IN THIS STORY OH MY IM SO EX- oh. right. oh hey theres mikey :D

___

me: who's this??

mom: its bill look, its his surname

me:

me: you remember bill's surname but not richie or ben's names?

---

oh theyre all grown up!! oh bevs fighting an abusive man again and uh

___

mom: i have a feeling stans gonna kill himself

me: hah can you imagi

---

STANLEY??? BABEY BOY OH NO???? and also are we gonna let the spider with the baby head thing pass?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY DONT REMEMBER ANYTHI-

"this is like a virus its been eating us for 27 years!" YEA MIKEY ITS CALLED PTSD YOU FOUGHT A FUCKING DEMON AND DIDNT SEE A THERAPIST????

also the whole tribe thing seemed really out of story and like it didnt belong there at all? idk maybe its just me but i dont wanna believe that bill's 3rd eye opened after he got drugged by his friend idk

so like hightlights because ive got many rants about the 2nd movie

what the fuck do you mean bev got out of jer specilized hell after ben recited 1 fucking poem are you kidding me are yOU FUCKING KIDDING ARE WE REALLY DOING THE SAVED BY LOVE BULLSHIT AGAIN OH OKAY

OH OKAY FUCK YOU

SO BEV GETS SAVED IN THE FIRST MOVIE AFTER BEN KISSES HER WHEN AT THE TIME HE PRIBABLY THOUGHT LOVE WAS AT ITS PEAK WHEN YOU GAVE YOUR 2ND GRADE CRUSH A BADLY WRITTEN POEM

AND UFKCING HELL IT HAPPENS IN THE 2ND MOVIE TOO??? DOES PENNYWISE JUST THINK "oh these bitches hetero bettet keep them alive" BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT? THIS WOULD ALL BE OKAY IF

IF

IF EDDIE LIVED TOO

FUCK I RELATE TO RICHIE SO MUCH??? HIS FIGHT WITH HIS PEERS AND HIS FIGHT WITH HIMSELF OVER HIS YEARS LASTING CRUSH ON EDDIE?? OH MY GOD IT WAS SO OBVIOUS THIS MOTHERFUCKER WAS GAY AND I DIDNT REALIZE UNTIL THE 2ND MOVIE WHEN HE HAS A BREAKDOWN BECAHSE HIS SOULMATE GETS STABBED BY HOMOPHOBIC FORTNITE DANCING CLOWN WHILR HE TRIES TO SAVE HIMA DN THEN FUCKIN G DIES EVEN THOUGHT THESE 2 IDIOTS HAD MORE CHEMISTRY THAN BILL+BEV AND BEN+BEV COMBINED OH MY GOD IM SO MAD THE HETEROS GET TO LIVE BY TRUE LOVE BUT THE GAYS DONT AND UG G H H G G HH "hes dead" NO HE FUCKING IS NOT THIS ISNT FAIR I LOVED EDDIE SO MUCH

well uh now that we got my love for richie on papet um

the lake scene

i cried and i had to watch heteros kiss underwater while wiping my tears. its only cool when percabeth does it guys

the lake scene aside i full on BAWLED LIKE A BABY at the ending because i felt so bad that stan died already and i felt bad that not only was richie facing years if bullying and homophobia anf the loss of his friends it finally is confirmed that richie had a crush on eddie and i

i just cried man? it hurt me so much as it weighed on me how many jokes richie made, how scared he was when he saw the missing paper of himself, his flashbacks to people calling him names, his speech to eddie and that he had to get dragged out because this fucker obviously couldnt let go of his feelings. and between all of that and stan's letter my brain blocks out everything and focuses on one

R + E

oh my god

OH MY GOD NO

NOW i dont really like watching movies. as a writer myself im really critical of everything involving the world building, the characters, the plot and all that jazz and usually the acting is so bad that i dont feel for the characters but THIS ONE. T H I S O N E

my mom turned to me and was SO SHOCKED to see my flat out CRYING because i just dont do that man, and she just asked my what made me cry and i just made a noise like "hhhnnnn" and she nodded and went "richie's love story" and i, still crying, went "hhhnnnn" but in a higher pitch

and im just so mad? that eddie didnt get to live?? we didnt get an "i love you" or even a "im gay" from richie??? we didnt get to see them holding hands and letting go of their trauma together and being gay and happy yet

yet the fucking bad-writer-white-boy and boo-hoo-i-had-no-friends and not-bev get happy endings??? mike can get a happy ending because he is a well thought out character

thESE 3 ON THE OTHER HAND OH MY GOD

bill had to change his endings which really makes me angry because ima writer yada yada

bill has been bullied his uh what whole life? he got told his opinion didnt matter and from what i remember even his parents shut down his ideas and i feel like he should have made the endings how he wanted instead of changing to what the public wanted. thats what he defended as a kid, thats why he was in the losers club unwilling to change, because they were losers. yet he changed.

ben should have stayed fat or at least have abnornal weight because that also defeats his story with bev. it makes it seem that suddenly and magically when ben is hot bev can BEGIN to consider that she loves him.

i already ranted about bev.

mike is decent i guess? i like that he didnt stay with whoever the fuck that was in the first movie because he seemed very aggreasive to me. im glad the chose to research into pennywise because others were too stupid not to (RICH AND EDDIE GET A PASS AGAIN BECAUSE THEY SHARE HALF A BRAINCELL AND I LOVE THEM)

well stan is just tragic

___

me: who the fuck is afraid of spiders why do they keep showing up

mom: its stan?

mom: he brought the hair things and all

me, about to cry: oh m y god

---

so TL;DR: we really liked the first film! the acting, the plot, the creepiness is overall better and you get to relate to a bunch of Losers who get abused by their parents

the 2nd film doesnt exist. i refuse to acknowledge it exist EXCEPT for the ending where stan writes a letter about how he would like to meet hks friends again while BREATHING and richie and eddie carve their initials on a piece of wood and get to be gay.

if your name starts with B your opinion is invalid in the 2nd movie

also can anybody give me fanfics where the fortnite dancing clown doesnt exist and richie goes to therapy to heal from the bullying and once he gets over his homophobia he gays with eddie??? specific i know but im willing to write it if it doesnt exist