#certainly not because it tastes good in some instances

[crmsndragonwngss]

I’m so sorry if you’re a tea person, but I fucking can’t stand tea people. Everybody’s like oh try chrysanthemum tea! It helps with anxiety and helps you focus and it tastes sweet and buttery without anything in it! It doesn’t make you sleepy like chamomile and it tastes better too! No it fucking doesn’t. It tastes like I put dried flowers in hot water. It tastes like the couch at grandma’s house. It tastes like I went outside and ripped up a bunch of daisies with my bare hands and shoved them directly into my mouth. Sugar, honey, and lemon do nothing to make it taste less like a bottle of febreze. Ice makes it tolerable, but it’s still just cold, oversweet old lady perfume. Does it make me less anxious? Sure, I guess. Might be power of suggestion, might be ancient Chinese magic, I don’t fucking know. But don’t lie and say it tastes buttery and sweet and delicious without added sweeteners when it tastes exactly like every other fucking flower tea but worse cuz it’s just mild enough that I can still taste the tap water underneath it

[gendercriticalthinking]

My thoughts:

The main intent of this post is very eye-opening and true. While I think a lot of psychological analyses, including this one, tend to create meaning and complexity where there isn't any (to get an intellectual/detective/solving-a-puzzle "wow" factor), and a lot of "womb envy" analysis seems to be more about comforting and empowering women than accurately analyzing male motivations (most violent men aren't subconsciously* resenting the fact that women can give birth, they just like to hurt people), the overall message does have truth to it. Many, maybe even most, violent men use violence as a way to gain control/power. (But all of them do it because they like to cause suffering.)

My eyes rolled into the back of my skull upon reading this author mention the Columbine shooters played video games. (I can kind of give her a pass since her writing was published in 2004, since I absolutely support questioning new things and investigated them to see if they cause harm. Also I'm only calling this out just because I didn't see anyone else doing so.) I'm sorry but if video games cause/escalate violent urges to the point you just have to kill someone, most people should be dead by now. It is a multi-billion dollar industry. Countless women have played violent video games since their creation and yet we for some reason have never had a sudden uptick in female violent crime in the late 80's or the decades since. It's a male problem. Men who have violent urges come to video games, movies, television, hobbies, schools, malls, grocery stores, life in general, seeking a way to unleash their urges through what is otherwise benign. They come to these things already violent, and saying a piece of media (or clothing) was the/a reason they hurt people is to absolve them of the blame they deserve for their own actions. Again, it's just because they like to hurt people and have control over them. The hypothetical man who used to be pure and kind but got corrupted by an FPS game still would have become a murderer if he had watched a horror movie instead.

I'll close out the compliment sandwich by appreciating the teardown of (popular/organized) religion, and how clearly it's laid out that its invention was by and for men to make a system where they could gain and abuse power and control over others (women especially). Men would not and do not worship a female God because God is meant to be a surrogate for themselves.

*Incidentally, I realized this idea from "womb envy" actually contradicts a belief a lot of women who believe in "womb envy" also seem to hold (or at least flirt with): that men are biologically inferior (usually the reason cited is because of their role for reproduction, which one Google search for how emu parents act should disprove) to the point they're mentally incapable of deep/complex/intellectual/etc thought. If men are so animalistic they can't do anything besides feel carnal/animalistic emotions, then they also can't have subconscious desires, because they wouldn't have a subconscious. And if you instead/then believe "womb envy" is a conscious desire that they just hide from us then the fact that they know to hide it (and are decent enough at it for "womb envy" to be a Feminist Iceberg Tier 4 Concept most people haven't heard of despite its supposed prevalence in causing male behavior) is, again, not something a stupid, purely animalistic being would be able to do well, or possibly at all.

having a good day then thinking about this one quote about no woman ever comparing herself to god after creating life by giving birth but every boy with a gun is a god in his own eyes because he has the power to choose who lives or dies and he uses it to take and destroy lives. coughing up blood right now. i need to be hospitalized.

[imaginarypasta]

one of the things i’ve noticed that changes between this series and the last is the newfound emphasis on diplomacy & decorum. i do understand why, both in how the narrative changes w the introduction of new ideas and frameworks as well as how it might want to adapt to have its own voice, themes, etc. but gone are the days of yes-anding oneself into strange situations and in are those of yet another scene highlighting the importance of a letter of introduction—and that was personally a huge reason why i liked the original series so much. i don’t even mind like diplomacy as a narrative device when it’s equipped in interesting ways but when it’s constant introductions to new characters that go relatively similarly every time & a very clear narrative voice insisting that original solution wouldn’t work when it’s 1. more interesting to me personally and 2. not even working any better practically, then that starts to get super boring

[a-book-of-creatures]

I think I stumbled upon some kind of ichthyological forbidden knowledge. Opened up a book of names that were never meant to be read.

You've probably heard of "can-opener smoothdream", right? It's practically a meme by now.

But the thing is, it's a deep-sea fish. And deep-sea fish have historically not had English names because nobody drops them into the conversation over a hot cuppa. Sure, there's generic stuff like hatchetfish and barreleye, but when you want to refer to the actual fish you're probably saying such euphonious phrases as Diretmus argenteus, Sternoptyx diaphana, or maybe even Opisthoproctus soleatus.

So whence "can-opener smoothdream"? Certainly no non-ichthyologist has ever used that name. It's not even a direct translation of the scientific name Chaenophryne longiceps - that would be "long-headed gape-toad". Which to me is even cooler than "can-opener smoothdream".

But I digress. The "dream" bit comes from the anglerfish family Oneirodidae, from oneiros, "dream", because those marvelous fishes look like they came out of a dream (Pietsch, 2009).

Note that Pietsch (2009), more or less the anglerfish bible, uses English names at the genus level only. So Chaenophryne is the smoothhead dreamers genus but no mention is made of "can-opener smoothdreams". So no luck there.

Wikipedia, root cause of a lot of misinformation, has this to say.

"Longhead dreamer" is a far more accurate name. And in fact, despite Wikipedia prioritizing "can-opener smoothdream" (because it's funny?), the links listed use "longhead dreamer" and "smoothhead dreamer" as the name and "can-opener smoothdream" as an alternative.

So. Again. Where did "can-opener smoothdream" come from?

The answer, as it turns out, lies with McAllister (1990).

In the book A List of the Fishes of Canada, ichthyologist D. E. McAllister sought out to list every single fish known to Canadian waters, providing both an English and a French name.

And when there wasn't an English name, like for most deep-sea fishes, he arbitrarily gave them a name. And his names "differ in many instances from the widely accepted names" (Holm, 1998)

This had varying results. This is his name for one of the netdevil anglerfishes.

The humpback anglerfish or blackdevil anglerfish becomes a werewolf (????).

This one is just confusing.

The white-spotted lanternfish or Rafinesque's lanternfish instead becomes...

And most embarrassingly, the Mediterranean spiderfish gets saddled with something that "violates the tenet of good taste" (Holm, 1998).

This then is the original source of "can-opener smoothdream". It was invented by an ichthyologist in 1990, and has seen little to no use outside of how bizarre the name is.

Maybe McAllister's goofier names will catch on. Who knows? They certainly aren't very popular in the scientific community though.

References

Holm, E. (1998) Encyclopedia of Canadian Fishes (review). The Canadian Field-Naturalist, 112, p. 174-175.

McAllister, D. E. (1990) A List of the Fishes of Canada. National Museum of Natural Sciences, Ottawa.

Pietsch, T. W. (2009) Oceanic Anglerfishes: Extraordinary Diversity in the Deep Sea. University of California Press, Berkeley.

[threepandas]

Beautiful Monsters: Yandere AfO

(Absolute GOLD STANDARD AfO art by -> blackberreh-art <- )

He had never stopped to consider his whore of a mother. Not for even an instance. Not to wonder who she had been. Not how she had come to be that way. And CERTAINLY not to wonder if she had, at some point, had siblings of her own. He had fed upon her. Consumed. Then survived where she had not.

Superior.

But now... now he wonders is perhaps he SHOULD have looked into it. Pondered, perhaps, WHERE his Quirk's genetics came from. Maternal or Paternal line? And did they have siblings? Other offspring?

It was certainly possible with the sperm donor. A man of no doubt loose morals, likely to have sired many. Though... how many SURVIVED the coming purges, is another thing entirely. Especially if they were Quirked.

He ponders this? Because he is staring down at his own distorted, yet magnificent, reflection. Through the surveillance screens, a SUPPOSEDLY unassuming public relations manager is shaking the hand of a low ranking hero. It is the seventh hand shake he's observed.

And that's just this sitting.

Just this meeting.

It is... MAGNIFICENT. Underhanded and brilliant. Predicated on the intense social pressures to maintain decorum, he knew if HE greeted in an Western manner, his victims would be forced to play along. What could they do? REFUSE to take his hand? Look RUDE and unreasonable? Even those few who THINK they know his Quirk, can't act.

It would appear bigoted. Quirkist. They have no PROOF.

All For One can only laugh. He is delighted. What a fumbling, audacious, greedy little scheme! How UTTERLY covetous. A "mute and mimic" quirk, was it? The "ability to 'briefly' copy quirks by 'temporarily muting' someone else's Quirk"? Oh, of COURSE! How completely non-threatening! It's TEMPORARY. Not GONE, just MUTED.

No need to VERIFY any of these facts. Why would a child LIE?

To get MORE? To avoid the hostile eyes of the power fearing SHEEP?

And to go into to PUBLIC RELATIONS! The gall! A brazen little monster in the making. He has to wonder... would HE have done the same? Had the world been as settled as it is now, when he was born? Were there no Quirk riots? No wars? Would HE have been content to "play the system"?

It's like looking through time at his younger self. So cocky. Self assured. A pretty, powerful, little thing that thinks it's the biggest fish in the pond. Hair like his brother, smooth to his curls, yet just as bleached bone white. Smug eyes, that dance with the secrets they keep. A vague smile, that gives away nothing.

Promises nothing.

He wants to RUIN him.

Grab him by that pretty little throat and SLAM him to the ground. Crater it. Hard enough to shatter the bones of lesser men. Wants to feel that pretty little thing CHOKE as he looks up at him with such magnificent disdain. As though HE is the insect that does not know it's place. That DARES touch it's better. Oh~

The poor little thing would have NO IDEA.

The sort of MONSTERS that have been lurking in the dark, ready to eat him ALIVE.

He has good taste, for the resources he has on hand. The budget he has to work with. The boy cleans up well, in his pretty little suits and quaint colognes. Decent cuts. Flattering. But All for One could do BETTER.

He keeps his hair long. A vanity and a means to soften their imposing jawline. Kept so neat and tidy. All of him, so very neat. So immaculately dressed. Clean.

He would RUIN IT.

As he holds him down by the throat. Under that furious gaze. He'd make him WATCH as he ruins the appearance he's oh so proud off. Shows him EXACTLY how different they are in strength. No knives, he thinks. Not even Quirks. At least, not directly, no...

Just his HANDS.

Ripping cloth. Shredding it beneath his fingers. Letting him kick and struggle in the DIRT. Insulted and wrathful. As All for One's hands wander. He wonders~ how FAR would the little monster let him get before he snapped?

He's been chained down for so long. So used to HIDING, can he even bring himself to do it? How far would All for One need to PUSH to get him to abandon his little plans, and FIGHT BACK?

Watching him struggle, FIGHT, throw EVERYTHING he has at him. Seeing the realization spark in his eyes that it's not ENOUGH. That it's hopeless. That beautiful despair. That he's pinned down like a butterfly for All for One to devour. A ruined beauty in his trashed remains of a suit.

The little monster would HATE it. Would RAGE. His lovely little mask of civility would come crumbling apart as he WRITHED beneath him. Trying to rip his throat out with his TEETH. Trying to claw out his EYES with that carefully maintained manicure. And All for One would DELIGHT.

Reveal in it.

Drink it all in, like the fine wine it was.

Because, OH~ What a magnificent MONSTER you've held back, little one~ Hateful and ugly. Just like ME~

All for One could out match him. Strength, experience, Quirks. His empire is sprawling while the boy has none. He COULD be a threat, in time. COULD grow to be an equal. But All for One could never allow THAT! The avaricious little thing would kill him!

No.

He's going to eat the boy ALIVE.

And his little monster will HATE it. DISPISE him. Because he his going to love it. And that? That CAN NOT be forgiven. Not by monsters like them. The defeat, the humiliation, the helplessness. It's unforgivable. But the PLEASURE? For THAT All for One will have to BURN. It can end no other way.

Not after he's held him down. Made him WEAK and filthy. Then found every spot that makes him twitch. Dragged open his mouth so he can not escape the NOISES he makes, as AfO swallows him whole. As quirks are combined to squirm, painlessly, easily, at JUST the right angle too...

He'd make him HOWL. Choke on his begging. Thrash and beg and curse.

Like he was DYING. Like he's begging for death.

You can torture a man with more then just pain, after all.

And he'd wants his little his monster OBSESSED. Wants the memory of his cock to HAUNT him. The feeling of being split open. Filled so gloriously, so PERFECTLY. Over and over again. Endlessly. With stamina beyond human limitations. With strength most humans could never dream off.

Combining sensory quirks and attraction quirks, body modification and lust quirks, into something NO ONE else could possibly hope to give him. Everything so sensitive, so pleasurable, it dances the line of pain. He could fry the pleasure center in your brain again and again, then FIX them, little monster. Could make you see GOD.

No one else would ever be able to give him that. The touch of his own hands would forever be ruined for him. Not enough. Never enough. Not after HIM.

And that's why his little monster would have to try and kill him. Would try and hunt him. Obsess. Chase. Rage. But oh, he'd fall in line, in the end. Because he'd LOSE. His cravings crippling him. His NEED to submit.

All for One watchs the security monitors. Lazily palming himself. He wonders... should he keep his little pet by his side? Or tucked away, chained safely to his bed? He supposes it would depend on his mood.

Leaning back, he let's a solid shadow quirk slide over his skin, servicing him. His eyes never stray from the screen. It's twenty-eight handshakes now. Quite the collection he must have. His little monster glances up at the camera and for a moment... it is as though their eyes have met.

Such MAGNIFICENT crimson.

He spills into the greedy, sucking, vice of the shadow he created. Then vanishes the mess. Decadent and relaxed, he orders his spies to gather more information. It's been entirely too long since he's last left the base. Not since killing Shimura. And with her idiot successor off doing... SOMETHING, in America? He has time.

Or at least, time ENOUGH, for a bit of monster hunting~

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Y'know, if Lila was just a one-off character for Volpina and we never saw her again, a few tweaks in that episodes writing could have made it a good lesson about not letting your temper get the best of you, even in a situation where your anger is justified

This is in reference to the post where I discussed how terrible Volpina's lesson is and I agree with the proposed change. If Marinette has to be in the wrong here, that's the only way to make it kind of work. In fact, this is what I thought the episode was trying to do on my first watch. When the next season started with Lila gone, I thought, "Okay, so that episode was supposed to be about being the better person and having a more measured response when you've been wronged. I don't think it did that lesson super well, but I can see what they were going for and we'll give them some grace. Definitely one that I wouldn't just give to a kid, though. Way too high a risk of them internalizing a very wrong message."

I only gave the writers that grace because I assumed that Ladybug had truly humiliated Lila out of Paris off screen (remember, we only see Ladybug out Lila to Adrien even though Lila was lying to everyone) and that is a pretty extreme punishment for a teenager making a dumb choice. Even then, saying that Ladybug was in the wrong feels a little too victim blame-y for my tastes. Lila was the one telling the lies and using Ladybug's name for clout on a city-wide scale or possibly even a national/international scale depending on the Ladyblog's viewership. By telling those lies, Lila was harming Alya's credibility and presenting herself as a sort of authority on Ladybug, a position that she was going to use to her advantage as we saw with her manipulating Adrien. She was also putting herself at risk if Gabriel or other villains believed the lies and saw her as a way to get to Ladybug.

That means that the lies Lila told aren't exactly minor, victimless crimes like the lies Marinette and Adrien tell to hide their identities. Lilia's lies needed to be outed on the same scale that they were broadcast and there's no kind way to do that. It's going to have a brutal edge no matter how pretty the words are.

There are times when it's right to be "the better person" and let a thing go, but it's hard to view this as one of them because this was not a nuanced situation. There was no reasonable option other than issuing a public retraction and Ladybug didn't even go that far! She had a single, private confrontation with Lila and then let the matter rest. A better version of this episode might see Alya and Marinette giving a really mean retraction on the Ladyblog that they then feel bad about because they should have been more professional, but that's about it as far as possible improvements go.

If we look at what the episode actually gave us, it feels like another Gamer situation. An episode that blames Marinette for impure motivations while ignoring anyone else's faults, creating a nonsense moral that just makes me mad. Ladybug-is-wrong-for-confronting-the-liar-for-impure-reasons is certainly a take. It's just not one that I'm ever going to agree with. To give a recent, real-world example, do people really feel that James Somerton was the wronged party because his many, many lies and instances of plagiarism were outed in a brutal public takedown? (Context part 1 & part 2, though part 2 is the one to watch if you only want to see why letting lies from respected sources go unchecked can be so messy.)

To be clear, I don't think that Lila's lies were Somerton bad in Volpina, but they were starting to go down that road and they arguably reached Somerton levels by season five. Fakes identities, almost getting Marinette expelled, using her lies to get social power from Gabriel, the list goes on, which is yet another reason to hate Volpina. Its nonsense moral is a big part of why Lila could do all of that. Ladybug should have outed Lila! Society suffered and will continue to suffer because she didn't. That's why you have to stop misinformation as soon as you possibly can, but that wasn't actually the moral of Volpina. The moral was that Ladybug was in the wrong for being mean to the liar. Maybe if she'd been nicer, then Lila wouldn't be so evil now which is a very gross moral! Volpina really does feel even more victim blame-y now that Lila is the new big bad.

That's a good segue to circle back and finish off my original topic: I gave the writers grace for Volpina until Lila returned and established that she'd never been publicly outed. At that point, Volpina lost any chance at me giving it charity. The lesson was worse than I thought and I was fully justified in hating it. It's one of the ones I use when I explain why I wouldn't want a child getting into Miraculous because the problem with Volpina's moral is pretty straightforward.

[wifegideonnav]

should i read homestuck. like i feel it would be interesting so i could see what yall are talking about in regards to tlt but is homestuck actually good

"is homestuck good" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 8129 pages of heated debate,

no but seriously, it highkey depends on 1. your definition of good and 2. your tolerance for stupid bullshit. as someone who read tlt and then hs, i'd say that being a fan of the chaotic aspect of tlt is a good predictor of being able to hang in with homestuck.

readmore because this. um. got long. the tl;dr is: i like homestuck a lot and i am glad i read it. i can't tell you if you should read it bc idk your tastes, but there is a lot to like and enjoy about it.

the official pitch for homestuck is something like "4 kids play a game and then a bunch of other shit happens." here's my pitch based on what the core of the story is to me:

several groups of characters across time, space, and reality are brought together in order to succeed at creating a new universe after their own are destroyed. this takes the form of a game, which is called sburb (by the humans) and sgrub (by the trolls). the characters must contend with an eternal battle against good and evil in which they are the deciding factor, and level up while following personalized quests. at its heart, homestuck is about relationships of every sort and how they shape us, growing up and the associated grief and loss, coming into ones identity and choosing who to be, predestination and fate, and stories themselves. it gets very meta at times, and the characters are semi to fully aware that they're characters, and attempt to subvert or escape that. it's got hordes of fleshed out, compelling characters, one of which will almost certainly glom onto you for the rest of your life, real emotion, extremely funny jokes, smart and exciting plotting, and some very cool moments. it more or less invented an entire new genre/medium, and plays with medium in a very cool way.

it is also clunky, hard to get into, and way too convoluted. you will never fully understand what's happening. there are tons of characters whose stories you will follow whom you simply do not care about. there are too many characters. it was written by an edgelord in 2009 so there's some unsavory humor and character writing. it's so fucking long. the ending kinda sucks because the fandom was so toxic that hussie simply wanted it over with. the fandom still kinda sucks tbh. so many people have wrong opinions about it. it requires a very specific lens to approach and understand it. i still dont understand what happened with that fucking puppet someone explain it to me.

overall, i'd say that if you think you want to read it, give it a shot. i have a complicated relationship with it but at the end of the day, i genuinely love the story and the characters and i know they will be with me forever. it certainly enhanced my understanding of tlt, and getting to read more of tamsyn's writing was such a bonus (even though her taste in pairings is. not the same as my own). and like honestly. it's just fun. even when you're going "wait what the fuck just happened" you're having fun. it's really goddamn funny too. it WILL change the way you speak and also think about romance forever.

the best way to read it is to have an experienced reader guide you, but if you or other people don't know anyone like that, here are my basic tips:

i think most people know this already, but download the unofficial homestuck collection. just do it. it's like 4 gigs and it's infinitely better than trying to read on the broken website, and it's even ad free. it can also be modded - for instance ik there's a slur replacer mod (lmao) if you don't want to read those

act 1 sucks to read. you're like what the fuck is this, THIS is homestuck?? the beginning is radically different from how it ends up, so just hang in there. for me, it really picked up somewhere in act 3. just focus on the silly fun the characters are having and you'll be good

things you should actually try to follow in the early acts: the concept of a sylladex existing (the various fetch modi are only there for jokes and eventually just kinda stop being a thing), where all the copies of the game are, what each kid's relationship with their guardian is like, the mechanics of the game and the lore behind it, including classpects and quests

things you do not have to waste brain space on: anything about how the totems work, what the various machines are, what the levels are, basically any of the jokes that would be funny to hussie's original intended audience of software engineers and rpg gamers. oh and the intermission with the midnight crew and the felt, just know that those are guys that exist and you'll be good.

and the biggest tip i have is just. go with it. suspend your disbelief. a lot of the worldbuilding doesn't really make sense, but it would be a worse story if it did. when the time shit and ectobiology come into play, literally just go ok got it and keep going, don't think too hard.

so yeah i don't even know if any of this is useful but i hope it helps you decide. and if you or anyone else have follow up questions send em!

[0alanasworld0]

Our Allens <3

How would our boys react to the Barbie Movie?

Warnings: none

♡ Yassine ♡

I imagine that out of the two of you he’d be the first to see the trailer when it comes out.

Like minutes into its release, already in his Youtube recommended 

He was well beyond the age of acting like he was too cool for it

It looked fun and right up your alley

You’re busy with work and he doesn’t close your laptop but he holds his phone over it so you can watch

You’re not too happy with the interruption but he just seems so excited, practically buzzing so you take the phone.

2 minutes and 42 seconds later, you’re up on your feet and buzzing with him

He’s quick to sift through your shared closet for things to wear (before everyone else decided to do it)

He’s got some pink dress shirts so he thinks he’ll be fine but you on the other hand

He’s not impressed by the lack of variety

There’s months before the film comes out but no, you need to be prepared and NOW

Practically dragging you to the mall to look for stuff because there is NO WAY you’re going to this film underdressed

He picks a hot pink skirt and white top that he thinks you would look cute in

He’s got surprisingly good taste, let's just say that and before you even open your purse, he’s paid for it.

As the release date gets closer and closer and more trailers come out, he has a new and even more brilliant idea

All black 

“If you wanted to go to Oppenheimer instead, you could have said!”

He gasps in offence and pulls out the screen-cap that inspired him

“... also what is Oppenheimer exactly?”

“Yassine, I can’t wear a damn tiara!” “Why not?”

You end up having to wear the tiara

You spend about half an hour taking photos in the Barbie box before doing anything

He doesn’t post anything because he never posts anything but you certainly do and it gets reposted onto the Sevilla instagram because it’s just too darn cute

He cries at the Billie Eilish bit but gets over it quickly so you can jam to the Ice Spice remix together

“I promise you that I’m more of an Allen than a Ken, Angel. I would never believe in patriarchy! And I hate horses!” “...” “Okay I don’t hate horses but you get the idea!”

“So do you want to watch oppenheimer?” “Angel, I still don’t know what that is if I’m being completely honest.”

He thought that Barbenheimer was just a cool reference to how well the film was gonna do

“Why is it such a big deal that they come out at the same time? Mamma Mia and the Dark Knight also came out at the same time and no one said anything about that!”

You do end up watching for the sake of it but he’s not feeling it at all.

“Do you think that Cilian Murphy is more attractive than me?” “He could never.” 

He’s quite pleased with that answer and he gets all blushy

He ends up dragging you to the next screen to watch barbie again right after for a ‘palette cleanser’

�� Abde ♡

You’re definitely the one to push it in this instance

He’s young, like really young, so there is a little bit of an obsession with that macho image

Much less of it since he managed to win you over by letting it go but its still kinda there

Even with that, he may have read a couple of unflattering reviews (obviously from men) so he’s not got the best impression

It doesn’t take you long to convince him at all because the the way your eyes lit up is enough 

He loves the idea of you dressing up all cute for it, happily help you pick an outfit but when you bring up the idea of HIM matching you, he’s not so keen

“Come on! What's wrong with a bit of pink? Most designer men’s clothes have a little bit of it!” “Yeah but that's different!” “Sure (!)” 

You do manage to get his approval of one pink shirt but he’s a little bit sulky the whole way home and you give him the silent treatment for it

He respects your space but he ends up whining to his brother about it which feels like the biggest mistake when his mum overhears it; more of a blessing in disguise to be honest

“That girl puts up with so much of your nonsense and you can’t even put on a pink shirt for her Barbie thing without adding on even more nonsense? Ya Allah, forgive me I’ve raised a wannabe macho idiot for a son!”

His dad ends up overhearing as well and gets to a stern explanation

“In what world is pink girly? It’s a fucking colour, son. Any ‘man’ that associated a colour with being a girl is a west-washed little boy, you wear little necklaces and get an eyebrow slit but you draw the line at pink? I raised you better than that.”

His brother ends up chiming in too.

“Yeah man, it's a little scummy. It’s a pink shirt and two hours of your time, she used to wear that ugly yellow kit happily to matches AND she watches you play video games for way longer than that, and at least a movie might be more entertaining…”

At first he doesn’t really want to believe anything that they’ve said but he spends the evening pondering over it, only feeling more and more guilty and time passes by

“I’ll just watch it with my friends, it's fine!” but you’re obviously disappointed, he can see it written on your face and you don’t give him time to say anything as you walk away

He spends a good hour going back and forth with you about that, eventually just wrapping you up tight in his arms and apologising over and over again

“Pleeeeeeeeeeaaase take me! It’ll be fun, I swear! I’m a fun guy, am I not?” “You’ve changed your tune.”

“My parents didn’t raise a west-washed little boy, did they?” you don’t know what that means but you can’t really ask with your face pressed up against his neck.

“Should I grow out the eyebrow slit?” 

You find the strength to pull away from him with that suggestion, “YES!” 

To add to the apology, he lets you do his nails but refuses to let you push at his cuticles

Not that you need to do that anyway because his nails are beautifully shaped and you LOVED being able to paint them

He does indeed make it a fun experience when you go out for it and you get some really cute photos together

He spends a while getting photos of you in the booth on your own because you looked so damn adorable

During the film, he keeps pointing out the outfits he thinks would look good on you… so basically everything.

He’s intrigued by the giant fur coat but you immediately put a stop to that

“But look! it's so-” “Ugly! Looks like a freshly killed polar bear rug!”

By the end of the movie, you're both in tears and he gives you the biggest hug he can manage when you leave the theatre.

Its a genuine eye-opener for him

“I’m such a Ken, anjo!”

It's his awakening: he didn’t really like acting all hard and cool anyway and now he had a better understanding of just how dumb that mentality was.

Constantly talking about “boyfriend-girlfriend” things

You didn’t mind but you wished he would stop referring to it as that because you wanted him in all his glory and you didn’t need to be laughing in the middle of it.

♡ Hakim ♡

Its a cute little moment where you swap phones to show each other the trailers

He’s definitely more intrigued by Oppenheimer but he’s happy to watch barbie with you

Of course, so long as you watch Oppenheimer with him

Like Yassine, well beyond acting too cool for a movie and the colour pink

Your outfits match and are a mix of pink and black so you can really get into the spirit of the occasion

You match clothes quite often but it still makes him smile when you get excited and scan over the outfits

He honestly just liked doing stuff with you and vice versa

He’s not really bothered by what anyone thinks of him anymore

You watch Oppenheimer first and he can’t help but point out the things he told you about when he explained the movie to you

He has some of his own critiques and gripes too

He’s not impressed when he sees the American flag nor is he happy with the nudity but he’s okay with the film, overall.

Surprisingly enough, he was actually quite excited for barbie. 

You had explained every little detail from the trailers and the underlying themes and easter eggs and he supposed that at least 1 live adaptation was ready to be faithful

You’re the more energetic watcher while he’s just extremely focused

Like his eyes don’t leave the screen once, he looks to be in deep thought

Although there is some palpable shock when Barbie is called a fascist

You’re worried when he hasn’t said anything by the end of the film, fearing that he was gonna be one of those

“Men really suck, huh?” 

Big relief and you agree with a laugh

You spend ages talking about the little intricacies in the movies and the deeper messages, from when you get back into the car and well into the evening

He does post a little thing on his story: a blurry photo of the two of you

His brothers do tease him a little bit but they’d all watched it with their partners too and they were all in agreement: it was fantastic

They acted cool and stoic critics about it on the outside but the excitement on the inside was still evident

You pointed out one of the dresses from the movie that you loved, thinking he wasn’t paying attention but alas

He goes above and beyond to find a replica and eventually just settles on a tailor to make you a custom one

He has your measurements because he’s bought plenty of custom pieces for you already and he wouldn’t stand for anything less than perfection

If he was picky for himself, imagine how h would be for the love of his life

He gets a little slap-happy with it and ends up ordering like 4 custom outfits for you instead of one

He wondered about whether he should save them for special occasions but he concluded that he just couldn’t wait

I imagine you coming back from a long day at work and the outfits are laid out, in their garment bags 

You assume that he maybe got himself some new jackets or something because that's pretty common for him

When you unzip the bags and obviously you’re surprised

“Do you like them?” “I mean yeah but… what?”

He can’t wait for you to process anything and he’s hurrying you to try it all on

Obviously you look absolutely stunning and the way he’s looking at you has you all nervous: partly because he always just looked at you like you hung the moon and stars but also you were slightly concerned that he was seconds away from tearing it off you

“Oh god, you’re such a barbie…” he knows exactly how big of a compliment that is, your beloved allen

♡ Nayef ♡

He definitely isn’t at Yassine and Hakim’s point where image isn’t that big of a deal but he’s an absolute sweetheart

Genuinely so positive and joyful, in that sense there’s a unique maturity about him

You call him over to watch the trailer with you and he doesn’t really understand but matches your excitement when you point out the little details

I feel like he would be doing a lot of his own research too, those youtube videos of people analysing the trailer frame-by-frame become his new obsession

I imagine he’d be getting into a lot of arguments on his burner twitter account with the bitter men trying to tear it down

He doesn’t care at all, he’s going to see barbie with you the first chance he gets and he’s going to find a matching outfit somewhere

You assumed he’d just find a pink shirt but no, he spends ages sifting through the internet for a ken inspired outfit that he could replicate and a barbie outfit for you, pink would not suffice on its own, you were gonna go all out with some proper references

He’s definitely the most Allen-esque of the boys, that's for sure

Proudly posts a photo of the pair of you on his story and your matching outfits with the reference on the side

He does get a lot of praise online for it for being so “brave” but he sees it as the bare minimum and doesn’t quite understand why it's such a big deal

Somehow he’s more excited than you at the theatre

And he somehow knows even more finer details than you as well, it’s kind of jarring

He LOVES the music and knows all the lyrics because he’s been listening to the album non-stop

He is in tears from America Ferrara’s beautiful speech

Constantly looking over at you like you’re a champions league trophy

The switch from emotional billie eilish to the upbeat ice spice remix is a bit of a shock but he just goes with it because at the end of the day, he’s having the time of his life with the movie

“You know I would love you no matter what, right?”

“Like you ARE extraordinary and perfect in every way but even if in some bizarro universe where you weren’t, I bet I would still be obsessed with you.”

And you fully believe him because he would drop anything and everything for you, no doubts in your mind whatsoever

I feel like he’d be so cheesy when you leave the theatre, like he’s carrying you to the car bridal style 

He would also refer to the deed as “boyfriend-girlfriend stuff” for months

He would be dragged to Oppenheimer with his friends but he comes back home too you and he looks far from impressed

“Well it certainly wasn’t Barbie, I know that much!”

not my usual style but i just thought headcannons would be a better format since i got requests for all of them! i hope u enjoy, lovelies <3

[ananke-xiii]

If you've been following me for a while you're certainly aware that I openly despise love triangles in fiction because they're almost always executed in a way that's completely unappealing to my personal taste and, consequently, perceived by the audience in a way that's invariably flat and flavorless to me.

For instance in Supernatural, whether you like/ship them or not, there are two established love triangles: Dean/Benny/Cas and Dean/Crowley/Cas. In both cases the apex of the triangle is considered to be, as far as I've seen, Dean and this is one of the reasons why these two triangles are boring to me. The way I personally see it (and that makes love triangles more bearable to me) is to consider the perceived apex's favourite as the real, hidden apex. In these examples, then, the real apex is actually Cas.

The way I see it, love triangles can be interesting if ALL power dynamics are explored. In the case of Dean and Benny it's so clear that it's Dean who holds all the power in the relationship because Benny is written like Dean's ideal&perfect&amazing partner that does everything Dean wants and asks for. As far as Dean and Crowley are concerned, things are different because Crowley is, initially, a total predator and a scheming abuser towards Dean until they made him discover "the power of love" that supposedly erase all the harm that was done before. Eventually, then, Dean holds way more power than Crowley in their relationship and, from beloved Juliet the hellhound's stand-in, Dean becomes Crowley's master. Both Benny and Crowley, however, "lose" the battle without even starting it because they're positioned as perfect brother/partner and fun brother/father's figures, respectively, while Dean and Cas' relationship is interesting because Dean seems to be way more interested in a third type of relationship, aka that with his best friend.

The thing is that in both these scenarios the one who really holds all the power is Cas. He literally doesn't need to do or say anything and Dean would "choose" him anyway. And viceversa with Dean (in different cases than these ones, though, in Dean's case the "third wheel" in his relationship with Cas is Heaven which, admittedly, is much worse than what Cas has to face). The power dynamics between Dean and Cas is just much more interesting than the other two because it's like a seesaw, it's always about them even when other people are involved. They're each other's best friend and it's very, very difficult to compete with that because (and I think Supernatural did very well in this respect) "best friendship" is not "just" about support and love. There's also antagonism and eroticism and everything that a non-threatening, charming, desired relationship with the Other entails. It is indeed magnetic and it's at its best when it's described as a polarity unless, I think, the third or fourth party chiming in is "powerful" enough to destabilize the connection.

And this is precisely why I don't care for these love triangles. In Dean/Benny/Cas case it's just so obvious that the moment Cas would eventually come knocking on Dean's metaphorical door no ideal&perfect&amazing partner could compete. I could've been interested if they gave more space to Cas and Benny's relationship: give me jealousy or competition or curiosity even, whatever, but give me some spice. To me it wasn't spicy enough so the love triangle feels bland to me (the actors played very well, I'm not talking about perfomances here, I'm talking about what we actually get to see on the screen).

The Dean/Crowley/Cas is potentially veeeery good because Crowley and Cas have history and if they had showed a little bit of that the triangle could've been interesting to me. In other words, I guess what I'm saying is that I don't like these love triangles because there isn't enough Cas&third party-related dynamics in them and, the way I personally see it, he was the real, hidden apex in both cases. Things would've been just much more savoury to me if that was actually showed (I believe it was implicitly showed because Cas' appearance/disappearance in Dean's life is what starts/ends these triangles but, like, the whole point is that I needed more screentime with Cas and Benny and Cas and Crowley for the trope to be interesting. To me).

[tiredassmage]

🖊 + may i hear your thoughts about whoever is on your mind.. a crumb of meowmeow...

*coughs.* I've held onto this for way longer than I ever thought I would or planned to and since we all are missing Tyr (affectionate), I'm going to attempt to put some Tyr content on the feed. I am only slightly sorry that it's the heartbreaking, feels-filled and fueled kind, lol.

So! *claps my hands together* We're going to need a spoiler cut because I'm going to talk about the Nathema Conspiracy again. Maybe properly for once. Because boy howdy is there a lot Tyr Deckard has never unpacked about the implications of the Nathema Conspiracy! [Edit: and some. Agent specific and other general story spoilers from before that point as well. General advice: this post is for after the Nathema Conspiracy arc is resolved, lol]

Iokath and onward has really interesting implications with Tyr for a boatload of reasons, really. As Alliance Commander, the decision to ally with the Republic on Iokath puts him in opposition with Acina - who, if memory is serving correctly and if not is just my own personal taste of how the story plays - is serving around the Dark Council and eventually on it in the era where Tyr was actively serving in Imperial Intelligence, or at least shortly after it. While I can't claim to have successfully completed the Dread Masters nor the Seeker droid questlines because of those sneaky little operations and heroics they tacked on at the end of those quest lines, I've sent Tyr to work for Acina on early Dread Seed investigations at least once, and to say the least, it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. Certainly her remarks on Iokath do the same - it solidifies that impression, the story as Tyr knows it, that he's only been as good as his work wasn't too much of a risk for the Empire, and for the Council in particular.

Which is kind of its whole own separate ramble that isn't what I said we'd talk about, but I'm not sure I've really publicly discussed it and foggily I think it's only been implied in some of my older fic writing here or there. Which... is a bit of a shame, really. Empress Acina nearly seems like a Sith he might be able to work with, up until that moment. Intelligence should have retired you when they had the chance - the kind of proof for Tyr's opinion that the Empire hasn't changed in the nearly twenty years he's spent in his Intelligence career. In hindsight, it probably feels foolish to have ever considered maybe some experience would've taught her something, to give just enough belief that the Empire might finally have a leader that would take it in a direction of improvement, but... Unfortunately, nothing that happens there and after really gives him much time to linger on it.

But, again, that's... a different podcast for a different day, as I've fondly picked up from a recent professor, lol.

SO. About the actual promised subject of this post, lol! I always have to be very careful introducing Tyr in my mind palace to the traitor arc as a story piece in general because... here's the thing... Tyr's incredibly loyal, at his core. But he's loyal in the way that he'll tear himself apart to save you the trouble of trying to do the same thing. His loyalty is the kind where he asks to be told the truth so he can lie for you.

And also the kind of loyalty where he'd pull a trigger on you for the sake of a long-term bigger picture outcome where you might be better off. Were the roles much different, Tyr very easily could've been the Alliance traitor, and unfortunately for anyone he cares for, I know he'd sell the role hook, line, and sinker. Which for now is just sort of a thought exercise @ho1ythunder and I like to torture our blorbos in occasionally, for the most part, rather than... a primary version of events, if you will. But it's a very interesting and chewy one because very few other instances tempt Tyr to show his loyalty in such a spectacularly disastrous (for himself and others) fashion, and therefore I think a lot of those closest to Tyr just... don't really. know, entirely, that he's... that way. He's incredibly good at masking such edges in the careful dance of duties he performs.

His loyalty and his saying he'd never (like to) hurt the people he cares for is no less genuine for this reality of him, certainly. But Tyr Deckard is not a man who does anything by halves, and on a gamble like the one against the Heralds for the sake of the Alliance and a Commander he'd trust and be loyal to? That's the last job in the galaxy to ever do by halves, if he wants even half a shot at it actually working in the Alliance's favor.

Tyr's the type that would end up in the Alliance either way, likely - very likely as an Intelligence asset, if not finally in a directing and overseeing operations role by that point in his life and career. He's likely worked with Lana practically from the start on locating the Outlander; they already served fairly close together in Sith Intelligence and Tyr is... not really the type to stay idle about something like Zakuul. He was already uneasy in the Empire given his... sympathies and mission history, after all, and the Republic's just as deep up Schitt Creek, if you will, about Zakuul, so defection to the SIS isn't really an ideal option at that point anymore.

The Alliance was where he could do the most good. He believes in that idea - of pulling together both sides, of forging something new and possibly better to confront something bigger than any one of them. And as Nine, he's played more than his fair share of spy games with shadow organizations - from the Star Cabal to the Shroud to the Revanites.

Regardless of how the Eternal Throne is resolved, unrest is almost a given with that much change going down in Zakuul. With the resources of Alliance Intelligence, it's... no stretch to consider someone with Tyr's track record could hunt down the Heralds. And it maybe should be little surprise he'd infiltrate them and play along to try to get information.

Unfortunately up to and including setting up an Umbaran train incident. To put the business end of a blaster against someone he likely respects and trusts. Someone he could even be quite close with.

Because he promised he'd never let a threat like the Heralds get that deep, that close to destroying what you've built.

Or, if you've been... less kind... Well. Tyr's had a bit of enough of his life being out of his own hands. Still, it's a lot of deaths on the line. A lot of lives.

Either way, the Heralds have to be stopped.

Infiltration. Assassination. Manipulation. All specialties of your ex-Cipher. Is it really any wonder he'd go so far? A doubt he's not above planting himself. For the sake of the cover. For the sake of keeping enough of Atrius's faith in his commitment and ability to follow through to figure out what he needs to gain the Alliance an edge it desperately needs.

And that is all interesting enough, I'd say! But no, I couldn't ever be that nice to him. I have to go and make sure Shara Jenn's involved regardless of him not being the main character! Because frankly Shara's reappearance on Nathema could ALSO probably be its own post and Tyr to this day STILL hasn't unraveled for me how he feels about it (his argument is that she already said there's nothing for them to discuss. And he can do many things; raise the dead and make amends with them is not among them). So her with a Tyr that's actually working for the Alliance within the Heralds is EXTRA chewy and interesting!

Because I like to believe she still remembers enough about how he works. Still remembers the younger Cipher Nine that stood against Darth Jadus, with no backup available and only her in his ear for advice, and argued with her that the human cost of the Eradicators was unacceptable. Her idealistic underneath the pragmatic facade of a well-trained operative Cipher Nine that defied the second most powerful living Sith, likely knowing full well it was likely a futile gamble with his own life.

That Cipher Nine doesn't match the work of the Heralds here. Oh, sure, they talk, they make nice. Maybe even rekindle a bit of those lost nights shared between them on Dromund Kaas nearly a lifetime ago now. But they're both playing a game.

A part of him still loves her - loves the woman he used to know. He may never have been able to fully trust her again after the Castellans - it was hard for him to trust anyone, but it made what he felt for her no less real. Maybe the same parts of her that are suspicious of his working against the Heralds' goals, the same parts that likely drive her to share advice with Atrius that this ex-Cipher she knows can't really be trusted outside of arm's reach... Maybe those same parts of her would like to still trust him.

But it doesn't matter. Imperial Intelligence is still gone. Cipher Nine's an Imperial ghost story. And it's been a long time since she's answered to Keeper of Operations Division.

And it's this... nexus of everything, everything it costs that... Normally, if it had been just any One of these acts in isolation...

If it'd just been the train. If it'd just been putting a blaster bolt through a trusted ally and friend? He likely could live with doing it again.

But all of it? An ultimate accusation from Atrius that he's betrayed everything and everyone he's ever claimed to hold loyalty for?

Imperial Intelligence for the deal with Ardun Kothe. Shara, for the same deal. He turned his back on Sith Intelligence to run off on this 'ghost hunt' with Lana. He's betrayed the Alliance now as well.

And all of that still nearly cost the Alliance everything. It almost didn't work. It nearly kills him. The hope he had for Shara to have made it out of this web of lies and madness that mired Intelligence in its cannibalization is utterly extinguished by her even being involved with the Heralds. He couldn't save her.

Was it worth it..? Was the cost... really worth it? Even in victory? Even though there's an Alliance left to judge his actions?

Little else - perhaps... nothing else he's done or survived has ever... really felt too far. But this would be. This was, he painfully realizes once the act's already finished. When there's nothing left but sparking machinery and the tang of blood on his tongue.

He might not be able to bear to ask for forgiveness, the bitterness of it all is so strong. He couldn't believe he'd deserve it, for what he's done. For what it's cost.

But will you? Could you? Enough to make him live with the guilt and the shame.

And if you could, well... Cipher Nine might finally cede he's been at this perhaps... too long. Another call like that.... It shouldn't have happened in the first place.

And THAT. That!!!!! To find a scenario where someone like Tyr, who... I'd say almost doesn't know how to quit. He doesn't just... give up, on anything. I'm sure a fair few would wish it'd take less to make him consider slowing down, to finally hang up the drive to be something like Atlas, with the weight of everything always upon his shoulders. But... damn, it sure is chewy something finally could. >:3

Tyr Vaiken Deckard, the man that you are etc etc. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

[ofmdsalt]

Do you think the fandom will come back, even somewhat, over time? You mentioned taking a break and coming back and while I personally don't think I will nor will other fans who have been harassed and hurt, maybe new people discovering the show in a couple of years will have a different/healthier take on fandom. Basically do you think time will fill the canyon and/or future fans will be able to make this fandom into something less toxic? Or the writing of S2 especially was egregious enough so the legacy of the show is basically fucked and never stood a chance?

hey anon! i'm sorry to hear about your experience within the fandom. it sucks that a place that is supposed to be fund and creative can turn into such a high school cafeteria, complete with all the bullying and clique behaviour.

i cannot speak for everyone's experience within this fandom, those who remain and continue to seek ways to curate a space for themselves and those who had to leave because it was no longer a positive space for them to be in.

i think it's unfortunate that such a positive show has to happen in one of the most turbulent and unsustainable eras of television. streaming culture and binge watching ruin the longevity of TV shows, and modern fan culture is too obsessed with consumption. OFMD came out during a time when a lot of things are in flux

new people joining the fandom will certainly bring new perspectives and have less baggage than the current bunch of fans, and i honestly wish the best to those who join to create new things.

the idea of the Canyon has done irreparable damage and harm to this fandom. it's become a convenient scapegoat, a label to slap someone with that you don't agree with.

didn't get into a zine? well one of the mods is a Canyonite.

someone writes Izzy as sympathetic or neutral in a Gentlebeard fic? well the writer is clearly a Canyonite.

in these instances, it becomes a conspiracy. it becomes a valid excuse to very weird about someone online. and this goes for both sides of this conflict: Gentlebeardies and the Canyon. i just think it's more weighted against the Canyon because, well, their ship won despite the fact that there was never any contest because it was always assured that Ed&Stede would come out on top. the fact that other people complain about other ships like Stizzy, Edizzy, and Steddyhands (always about these three which really tells you what this group is more focused on)

my final thoughts on this is that both sides have created their own block lists, but the Gentlebeardies side is less willing to admit that they are in their own canyon. the only way to really end this is to stop talking negatively about Izzy. stop doing ship war shit. there is so much more joy people get out of fandom if they curate it into a positive, uplifting experience rather than falling into this clique high school behaviour

as for people's reactions to s2, i think what will happen is something similar to BBC Sherlock s4. that season was written poorly and as fans came back to reflect on their experience with the show to realize it had always been written poorly. s1 of OFMD is still solid TV and there are parts of s2 that are good, and fans will do what they have always done. take the parts that are good and build off of them, take the parts that are bad and transform them into something good. or continue to engage in AUs and make something new. that is the positive transformative experience of fandom. but with the uncertain future OFMD, if it will ever get picked up for something new, means that some fans will look back on it and realize that s2 was a let down.

the legacy of OFMD has already made its mark, but the toxicity and the entire Save OFMD campaign will leave a bitter, sour taste in some fans mouths, and that will be part of the fandom's legacy until the bitter end. the abandoned fics with final chapters that layout harassment people faced and why they can no longer continue.

i don't blame the fans who've left. i only wish it could've been on their terms rather than feeling like they were forced out

[mmkin]

Moar Arlong!!!

Next chapter of 'Get You Some Arlong is now up. Tasty (NSFW) snippets are available under the cut.

o0o0o0o

Arlong’s affection for you makes it clear that he does care for you. But he is a prideful and greedy fishman, so there are times that can manifest itself in intimacy. He loves being on the receiving end of oral ministrations, sitting back, his proud flesh hard and throbbing. From your vantage between his thighs, he is like a god being worshiped by you.

And let’s be frank, he pretty much is a god in the bedroom. If this means you have to worship him sometimes, so be it… though it’s not as if you don’t enjoy it. You’ll take one in your mouth while using your hands or tentacles to work the other one while listening to his sounds of pleasure and approval, his fingers tangled in your hair as you minister to him. You enjoy the taste of him, and there is something thrilling about having his hard flesh pressing against your lips and tongue, and the way it will twitch with the right amount of fondling or squeezing.

He also likes a very visual confirmation of his ‘godly might’ over you, so these sessions usually end up with you getting at least a couple of loads shot onto your face or chest. The sight will often inflame his passion afresh, and he’ll fill up your eager pussy with more of his cum, leaving you quite a trembling, panting, sticky mess, but thoroughly marked – and claimed – as his.

Arlong may think much of himself at these moments, but as you know, he’s only getting that intense pleasure because of you. You are the one who makes him pant and growl in ecstasy, and it is your name that he utters when he’s coherent enough to speak.

o0o0o0o

As your bond with him strengthens, one night, you venture to bind him with your tentacles. Instead of simply massaging him as you often do with these writhing appendages of yours, you pull his hands over his head and bind his wrists together as you climb into his lap. He resists at first, but you make that tutting sound he sometimes does.

“Trust me,” you whisper. You are certain he could tear a tentacle off with that freakish strength of his – so good thing he has nothing to actually fear from you. “You are captain of your ship and crew, and lord of these islands. I do not question your authority, but perhaps you’ll let me be the boss here… for a bit of time, at least.”

He studies you with a half-lidded gaze and raised eyebrow. “Well then… let’s see how good you can be. You’ve certainly proven yourself often enough in other things,” he responds dryly, though you do not miss the curiosity he tries to mask.

There is one thing you have learned about him in your intimacy with him. He certainly was not lying when he said he enjoyed your touch, but there are times when he’s practically touch-starved, and it is a fortuitous matter indeed that he has a lover with extra limbs. While he is your captive, you put your appendages to work, stimulating him but denying him his orgasm. You can tell he is tempted to slide free of the grip you have on him so that he can pin you down and pound into you to sate his pent-up need. There is no mistaking the fierce hunger that burns in his gaze, his muscles taut or twitching depending on where you’re touching him.

His self-restraint is admirable, and you reward him well.

You have proven yourself to be good at dominating the mighty Arlong the Saw. He does not permit these instances often, but you know he enjoys it when you take control even if he will not say that out loud.

[helianskies]

Frain - 16?

you know what. i haven't written a ficlet for frain since the winter prompts last year. and this is perfect. here you go! >:)

Friends

“You know something,” Antonio begins as Francis sits down opposite him, having brought them both their second hot drink (a hot chocolate for Antonio, who really doesn’t need any more caffeine in his life, and a vanilla latte for himself). 

“I know a few things,” Francis quips. “Go on, though. What is it?”

“Well,” his friend continues as he claims his cup and starts to warm his hands on it, “I was just thinking that… I’ve been on a lot of romantic dates in my time, and yet, I still think the best ‘dates’ I’ve ever actually had have been with you.”

Francis is not sure where this has come from or why, but he’s curious. Antonio has had his fair share of liaisons and short-lived relationships, and has heard all sorts of stories. So he supposes that this thought of Antonio’s is a bit random, out of the blue, unexpected. 

“You’ve had some good ones, no?” Francis therefore remarks, before he gives his latte a taste—perfectly sweet. “They can’t all have been bad.”

“Francis.”

“Mmh? Yes, w— what?”

“We are sitting in a café. At a spa. For a ‘romantic weekend getaway’.”

“And what of it?” Francis responds (though, admittedly, he hasn’t thought of it like that, and feels a bit embarrassed that Antonio has pointed it out). “I had a voucher! I had to bring someone.”

“Hey, I’m not complaining,” Antonio says, nevertheless. “I just think… on top of the spa, there’s the fancy meals out, the botanical gardens, the picnic, the pottery class, the art galleries, the family dinners…” A warm smile has bloomed on his face. “Why is it that you manage to take me on better dates than anyone I have ever actually dated?”

To that, Francis lacks any real response. He doesn’t know how to feel. He… can’t think of an instance where it’s ever been intentional, to invite Antonio to do so many different and fun things with him that, from the outside looking in, probably did look like romantic gestures. 

Upon reflection, though, Antonio is no less guilty of such things. 

Sometimes he turns up to Francis’ place clutching a bouquet of flowers (‘I just thought the colours would look nice in your kitchen’; ‘I remember you saying you like calla lilies…’). Sometimes he texts randomly in the middle of the day and says things like, ‘i heard there’s a new restaurant by the docks’ followed by a flurry of emojis of wine bottles and hearts and winking faces…

It’s like how Antonio would offer to do Francis’ hair before going out, to sit and listen as he offloads a bad day at work, to do some tidying in his garden (that is not a euphemism!) because it isn’t Francis’ priority. He’d even agreed to have a look at Francis’ car when he’d had issues with it starting, popping up the bonnet, playing mechanic for him. 

He’d gotten so messy, but had fixed whatever the issue had been, and… well, that is what friends do, no? Help each other? Have a laugh with each other? Go out with each other?

It isn’t that Francis doesn’t care for Antonio. He’s… He’s certainly had his moments of feeling like he cares too much for Antonio, like he’s overstepping or walking a fine line at best. But he doesn’t want to ruin what they’ve got. He doesn’t want to put twenty years of friendship at risk just because he may or may not sometimes believe he lo—

“Take me on a date.”

Francis sputters on his latte. He moves his cup away as he begins to cough, and Antonio hurries to pass him a napkin, apologising profusely for saying such a thing at what was clearly the wrong moment.

“It’s fine,” Francis replies, giving his mouth a quick wipe as he tries to compose himself. “It’s fine, it just— it just caught me off-guard, that’s all.”

“I’m sorry,” Antonio says again. “But I… I do kind of mean it, you know.” He gives a gentle sigh, and holds onto his hot chocolate again in both hands. “I dunno… Maybe it shouldn’t surprise me, but I just always seem to have more fun being around you than I have with… Well… Don’t worry,” he dismissed in the end. “Forget I said anything.”

But how can he? How can Francis pretend that he didn’t just say something like that?

Even though Antonio is trying to hide behind his drink, Francis feels that hiding is an impossibility for both of them. So, he reaches out and steals away Antonio’s hand, having to pry it carefully away from porcelain.

Despite Antonio’s wariness, Francis says, “Maybe we can talk about it later on, in our room.”

Antonio looks meek, if not disappointed. “For the best,” he replies. “Sorry for bringing it up.”

“It’s fine, really,” Francis assures him. 

He gives Antonio’s hand a pat—all he can think to do in the moment to try and comfort him, knowing that… things may now be awkward between them—before Antonio pulls his hand back, returns it to his cup, and instead decides to talk about their next shared session. A ‘sleep and reset treatment’. Maybe that is what they need. A reset. A hard reset…

[ full ficlet collection here on ao3! ]

[torahoes]

(IDOLiSH7) Torao Mido - VD Winter Date Rabbit Chat: Part 1 - New Discovery!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Please note that I am not a professional translator. If you come across any mistakes, feel free to let me know and I will make the necessary corrections.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Good work today, Mido-san. And thank you for the other day!

Tsumugi Takanashi: I heard from Yamato-san and Mitsuki-san that you joined them for drinks after the recording! It seems the two of them really enjoyed themselves!

Torao Mido: I see. I think I had a pleasant time as well.

Torao Mido: I often get invited by Touma to all kinds of different places too, although the spots my members chose had a slightly different feel to them.

Torao Mido: The place I visited with those two was a peculiar restaurant specializing in creative Japanese cuisine. When they were guiding me to an old building, I wondered just where on earth they were taking me.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Ah, could it be the restaurant they’ve recently taken a liking to? The one that is said to have been built by renovating an old Japanese-style house...

Torao Mido: Yeah, that's the one. It's a hideaway-esque spot with an earthen floor and a veranda. We sat in a private room around a sunken hearth, but I was surprised there were no tables. Like, how are we supposed to eat?

Tsumugi Takanashi: I understand, it can certainly be surprising if you’re unfamiliar with it and it’s your first time. I heard from Yamato-san and the others that the place has a nostalgic atmosphere, so I'd love to visit someday...!

Tsumugi Takanashi:

Torao Mido: You’re still underage, right? Once you become an adult, I’ll teach you what good alcohol tastes like.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Thank you very much! I apologize for imposing, but I'd love to visit various places together once everyone becomes of age.

Tsumugi Takanashi: And how was the food?

Torao Mido: We ordered fish and broiled it over the hearth. Eating while listening to the sound of the fish sizzling made it taste as delicious as the broiled fish they serve at high-end restaurants.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Wow, that sounds amazing! You can't go wrong with that!

Tsumugi Takanashi: I heard the cuisine was unique. It seems they have many unusual items on the menu, don’t they?

Torao Mido:  There were way too many dishes. The seasonal dishes were also made with a variety of ingredients. It was clear the owner had undergone extensive training; I have to commend him.

Torao Mido: For instance, there was a dish named “A different kind of sashimi”. I found the idea of not knowing what kind of dish you'll get until you order it quite fun.

Torao Mido: When I ordered it, it turned out to be sashimi made from Japanese yam. It was my first time trying it, but it was good. I should tell Touma about it too.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Sashimi made from Japanese yam…. I’ve never heard of anything like that before!

Tsumugi Takanashi: I suppose it just shows how confident they are in the taste.

Torao Mido: They also seem to be quite particular about the production place. Apparently, they go to the market themselves every morning to buy vegetables and fish.

Torao Mido: Nikaido and the others seemed to be close with the owner. I got to taste some menu items that were still in development, but when "Caramel-coated Radish" was served, I seriously questioned their sanity.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Radish and caramel...!?

Tsumugi Takanashi:

Torao Mido: Shocking, right?

Torao Mido: At first, I thought there was no way it would work. But when I tried it, it was surprisingly good. Perhaps because of the butter, it had depth.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Did it have a sweet aroma? I can't even begin to imagine the taste...! To come up with a combination like that, the owner must be quite skilled.

Torao Mido: It's definitely innovative, huh?

Torao Mido: We were attempting to figure out what seasonings were used as we tried the dish, but we couldn't quite identify the instant coffee.

Torao Mido: Our chef makes creative dishes too, but I don’t think his vision is as broad as this. It might be good to let him try these dishes once.

Tsumugi: Takanashi: Dishes served at hotels and such often feature novel combinations that are not commonly found in normal restaurants after all, right?

Torao Mido: Do you frequent such places?

Tsumugi Takanashi: Ah… no, not at all.  > <   I've only been a few times for business dinners and such.

Torao Mido: Huh. So it wasn’t for dates.

Torao Mido: I’ll take you, then. What do you like? French? Italian? Or perhaps you prefer Japanese cuisine?

Tsumugi Takanashi: I wonder what would be good if we were to go with everyone… I’ll try asking them!

Tsumagi Takanashi: Ah, but I’m really looking forward to the "NEXT Re:vale" Valentine’s Date project!

Torao Mido: Yeah, they're apparently collecting ideas for the dates from the viewers and demonstrating them on the show.

Tsumugi Takanashi: It's not typical for ŹOOĻ to participate in this type of project, so it seems the fans are curious about what kind of concepts will be chosen for you!

Torao Mido: So far, we don’t know anything about the details of the dates either. Well, I’m just gonna do what I always do.

Torao Mido: I’m used to meeting others’ desires, after all.

Tsumugi Takanashi: As expected of Mido-san! I'm looking forward to the broadcast even more now!

Tsumugi Takanashi:

End of Part 1.

[shion-yu]

Ears Ringing

Cliff can't afford his meds and can't keep anything down anymore. My fill for my @badthingshappenbingo space "Ears Ringing." OC work, 2,816 words. TWs parental abuse, emeto, chronic illness whump, detailed hospital descriptions.

For years now. Cliff's neurological symptoms have been all over the place. Sometimes he's eloquent and polite, echoes of his former brilliance shining through. Other times he can't remember the names of simple objects or can't stop crying. Sometimes he walks fine, and then the next day he needs his wheelchair. It's inconsistent, frustratingly so, and Cliff can't stand it.

He's depressed. He knows he's depressed, but he can't do anything about it because he's already taking antidepressants and he's scared if he says anything they'll stick him in the psych ward. Phoenix always used to tell him he was crazy, and Cliff worries he is. He sees shadows in the corners of his eyes all the time and hears people in the apartment that aren't there. One time Elliot catches him with a knife in his hand in the middle of the night hunting for some unknown threat. It's bad, really bad. He's never hallucinated before but he is now nearly every day. It’s getting increasingly difficult for him to tell the difference between what’s real and what’s not.

Bothering other people with his problems is the last thing Cliff wants to do. Elliot's busy writing his album with Alex, Moira’s got her baby and Matt’s in law school. So Cliff's alone a lot of the time, which he doesn’t really mind but sometimes it’s easier for him to pretend everything is fine when he has someone else to pretend for. He dropped out of law school a year ago and he still hasn't figured out an alternative career path. He tutors people online to take the LSAT, which is enough to pay the rent on his tiny condemned apartment, but that's all. He can't take Elliot out and treat him because it seems his parents have washed their hands of him and he can barely keep up with the copays on all his medications. His parents haven't officially disowned him - yet - but when they found out he dropped out of law school they stopped sending him monthly support checks. 

Cliff's started halving his pills to make them last longer, and the first to go completely are the antidepressants and anxiety meds. After that he cuts out the ones that he knows don't necessarily keep him alive, just feeling better: the antiemetics and pain medications. Eventually all the ones that were giving him any sort of quality of life are gone, but he's still sort of okay until he starts running out of his steroids: it's when he starts halving his prednisone that the hallucinations begin.

He's spending more days in bed feeling sick than not at this point. He doesn't leave the apartment and Elliot seems to be getting increasingly worried despite Cliff's best efforts to put on a good show. He's losing weight by the day and he's vomiting nearly everything he eats up. Elliot tries to coax food into him but it's not working. Even Cliff's favorite Japanese and Chinese comfort foods cause him misery, so it's certainly not a matter of taste. At least he saves money not having to buy groceries. 

Cliff had promised Elliot that he'd never hide this stuff from him again back when they broke up. So he doesn't hide it and he never lies, but he tries to sound casual when he answers like it's not a big deal. If Elliot asks, Cliff admits that he's not feeling well, or that he's nauseous. Elliot starts keeping a journal of Cliff's intake and instances of vomiting, then realizes there's no way Cliff's actually retaining any nutrients. He makes Cliff an appointment with a GI specialist, but the wait is four months out. Elliot is worried Cliff can't wait that long and tries to convince Cliff to go to the emergency room, or at least tell his father and see if he'll order some tests, but Cliff refuses. He promised to communicate with Elliot, not anyone else. Lucky for Cliff, Elliot never seems to think to ask him about bills or voices that aren't there. And his dad is drinking again, so Cliff doesn’t bother talking to him.

It comes to a head when Elliot can't get a hold of Cliff. Their relationship is still young despite all of their history, it feels fragile, and Cliff isn't answering his phone. Elliot worries Cliff's withdrawing and doesn't really want to be in a relationship, but he can't bring himself to think that's true so easily. So he breaks into Cliff's apartment for answers and finds Cliff passed out on the bathroom floor soaked in piss and vomit. He doesn’t respond when Elliot shakes him and shouts his name, but at least he’s breathing. Elliot calls 911.

Cliff doesn't wake up on the ambulance ride to the hospital. Elliot's glad for that because he doesn't want how scared he feels to come out as anger. The scene is eerily familiar to how Elliot had found Cliff on the floor of their dorm room all those years ago, but Elliot tells himself it's not the same. He'll at least give Cliff the chance to explain why it isn't. Still, why hadn't Cliff told him how much he was struggling? He could have reached out and Elliot would have been over there to take care of him in a heartbeat.

"I didn't want you to worry," Cliff mumbled when he wakes up, before lurching forward and dry heaving into the emesis basin Elliot's holding. He has a high fever and Elliot thinks now's not the time to yell at him for being foolish. "I really thought I could manage," Cliff says through a single sob. Elliot's heart clenches in pity. Cliff's never known how to rely on other people thanks to his parents. Elliot wants Cliff to rely on him, but it's not something he can force. 

The doctors come in and ask if Cliff's been taking his medications as prescribed, especially the steroids. Their expressions are almost accusatory and Elliot doesn't understand why until Cliff looks down, face clearly ashamed. "Cliff, why not? Do you want to die?" Elliot asks, aghast.

His heart breaks when he hears Cliff whisper in the tiniest voice, "I couldn't afford them anymore." Elliot's still upset and worried, but suddenly he understands. Cliff starts crying; Elliot holds him close and tells him it's going to be alright, that they'll figure it out. He'll help Cliff pay for his meds as much as he can. When Shu comes by with food for Elliot he offers to let Cliff live with him for a while, in Alex's old bedroom. There's options. But right now, Cliff needs to focus on getting better.

The doctors tell them that Cliff's body went into shock from stopping his prednisone too quickly. He's lucky he's not in a coma. Not only that, but the granulomas on his lungs have grown and he has new ones on his brain. Does he have headaches, they ask him? Fatigue? Hallucinations? Cliff can't bring himself to look up as he answers yes to all of them. Has he ever fainted? Had a seizure? Cliff looks at Elliot for just a second, chest burning with shame. "I think I had one before Elliot found me."

After the doctors leave, grim faced and what Cliff feels is painfully judgemental, Elliot rubs Cliff’s back as Cliff begins to gasp for air and tears stream down his face. Elliot knows Cliff’s having a panic attack and tries to get him through it. “It’s gonna be okay, Cliffy,” he says sadly. “Talk to me.”

“I never lied to you, I swear,” Cliff says. Elliot feels his own eyes fill with tears.

“I know, shh,” Elliot soothes. “I wish you would have told me, but I know you didn’t lie. You’re going to get better and this is never gonna happen again.” Cliff just cries harder until he vomits. Elliot helps him shower while the nurse changes the sheets; it’s not how he had imagined their first time showering together after getting back together might go, but he’d rather be here than Cliff be alone right now.

Cliff's woefully underweight. His nausea is so bad that he can’t keep any oral medications down, either. They force an NG tube into him, which is one of the worst things Elliot's ever witnessed. He has to stand in the hall after the first failed attempt because it's so disturbing. It looks more like torture than treatment. Eventually they get it in and start the tube feeding, but the response isn't what’s expected. They haven't even brought it up to goal rate when Cliff begins projectile vomiting the tube feed all over like the fucking exorcist. The vomit makes him choke and he coughs the NG up less than twenty-four hours after they managed to get it down. Elliot holds him while he sobs and apologizes over and over. 

"I'm sorry," he cries, "I tried to keep it down, I really did." He's distraught and Elliot does his best to comfort Cliff, but he feels like there's so little he can do. He’s never seen Cliff cry this much and it’s breaking his heart.

As a result of the failed feeding tube, Cliff gets more tests and is diagnosed with gastroparesis: paralysis of the stomach. It could be temporary or it could be forever, they say. There's no way of knowing right now, but it explains why he hasn't been able to keep food down for a while. He needs a J-tube that will bypass his stomach to give him nutrition, and he gets that surgery two days later. 

The pain is unbearable. It takes days to get it under control despite finding no issues with the actual J-tube placement. Some people are just very sensitive to surgical pain and Cliff is unlucky enough to be one of them. He's so beat down by then that he just lies in bed clutching a pillow to his abdomen and sobs openly. Nothing really comforts him and Elliot doesn't know what to do. This is scary and he feels like he can't handle it on his own. Milo and his mom give him some support, but it's weird when neither of them are fans of Cliff to begin with. Shu and Alex come by to give Elliot a break sometimes. They sit with Cliff while Elliot takes a much needed rest at home where he can shower and scream in frustration a few times. 

It feels like whenever things start getting better for Cliff, some new aspect of his illness appears and they start over from the beginning. Elliot carries a certain level of regret that he wasn't there when Cliff was first diagnosed. Maybe if he was, he could have fought for Cliff to get diagnosed sooner. Maybe he could have protected Cliff from his father more. He tries to now, when Dr. Barrows comes not to help but to yell at Cliff for being so stupid as to stop taking his steroids. "Were you trying to kill yourself?" He snarls at Cliff, who shrinks back and can't answer. "Are you trying to humiliate me?" 

"Maybe if you guys spent just a tiny bit of your fortune on keeping your own freaking son alive, he wouldn't have to ration out his meds," Elliot spits at him. He doesn't care that Cliff's father is a famous surgeon. He's left his only son to struggle all by himself because of circumstances Cliff can't control, and so to Elliot he's the shittiest quack out there. 

"I don't remember Cliff ever asking us for help," Dr. Barrows points out coolly. Elliot can't argue with that. He doesn't know for sure, but it certainly wouldn’t surprise him if Cliff hadn't said anything to his parents. Even if they would have helped, who could blame Cliff when this was his dad? "And who the hell are you?"

"He's my boyfriend," Cliff says weakly. Something inside of Elliot is mended then. Cliff, who was once too scared to tell even a random passerby that they were together, is telling his father. Then, another piece of Elliot breaks when he watches Dr. Barrows cuff the side of Cliff's head with such force that Cliff's oxygen falls off. 

Cliff yelps in pain and grips his ear in shock, ears ringing. Elliot's horrified and frozen. Who the hell hits their own son while they're in a hospital bed? The pungent smell of whiskey probably has something to do with it. "You are not my son," he hisses venomously, then leaves. His hatred lingers in the air just as strong as the smell of booze. 

"Sorry," Cliff says after several seconds of awkward silence, breaking the spell. 

Elliot shakes his head as he jolts back to reality and rushes to Cliff's side, looping Cliff's oxygen back over his ears. He hugs Cliff close, shaking with anger. "There's no reason to be sorry," he insists. "The only person who should be sorry is your dad for being such a shitty person." Cliff flinches at Elliot's strong reaction, but he knows it's not directed towards him.

“Yeah,” Cliff says uncomfortably. “I guess. Thanks.”

It takes two weeks, but eventually Cliff is discharged: into the care of Elliot and the home of Shu, because the social worker says it’s not a very safe idea for him to live alone. Cliff hates feeling like he requires a round the clock babysitter, but he knows they’re right. He can’t walk more than a few steps and that’s with a walker, he’s not steady enough to use his crutches right now. Cliff promises he’ll keep quiet and not cause any problems, but Shu tells him that he should make himself feel at home. It’s a small two bedroom and Shu can’t help much monetarily, but he promises a safe and comfortable place where there’s always enough food on the table (figuratively, since Cliff doesn’t eat anymore). It’s what he promised Alex when he adopted him, Shu says, and he can promise Cliff that too now.

No matter how much he dislikes needing the help, being in Shu’s home makes a world of difference. It’s warm and homey there and Cliff likes how he can see into the backyard from the kitchen table. There’s a bird feeder and a swingset back there, which Shu says was from the prior owner but he never removed because he had wanted kids someday. Alex was twelve when he came to live with Shu, so a bit old for it, but Cliff imagines him there anyways. Elliot and Alex are around all the time since Shu’s garage doubles as their music studio, and sometimes Cliff bundles under blankets and watches them practice. Sometimes Alex’s boyfriend Ryo is there and he watches too. Elliot drives Cliff back and forth to doctors appointments, PT and OT in the same old car they used to have so much fun in back in college. He finds every co-pay assistance program available for Cliff to utilize, but then money starts appearing in Cliff’s bank account again every month from his parents. Elliot thinks maybe his words couldn’t do much, but they apparently did something. Well, his words combined with Moira giving their father absolute hell when she found out what happened.

It’ll be Christmas soon. There’s snow on the ground and the cardinals that visit Shu’s bird feeder look so lovely and bold against the white. Cliff’s sitting in Shu’s kitchen watching them as Elliot brews tea. “Can I tell you something?” Cliff says.

“Of course. Anything,” Elliot says, carrying a steaming mug over and placing it on the kitchen table. He sits next to Cliff and leans his cheek in his hand. His green eyes are so lovely, Cliff thinks to himself. 

“I miss living together,” Cliff admits. Elliot looks surprised, but then nods.

“I miss it too.”

“Living here reminds me of when we visited that cabin upstate, all the way back in freshman year,” Cliff says. “That was the best vacation ever.”

“Seriously?” Elliot asks, smirking a little. “Even though we both had terrible head colds and spent the entire weekend in bed?”

“Yeah,” Cliff said, smiling fondly. “It felt like a real home, for the first time in my life.”

Elliot stands and hugs Cliff, planting a kiss on his temple. “I’m not sure when we’ll move in together, but we can definitely go on vacation again,” he says honestly. He doesn’t want to rush things this time, like he felt like they had the first time around. 

Cliff nods. “I’d like that.”

Elliot rests the side of his head against the top of Cliff’s head. “You keep getting better and then we can go, deal? Maybe sometime after Christmas.” Cliff hums easily in agreement. He’ll keep working hard to get stronger so they can do the fun stuff they used to do together as soon as possible.

[koishikomeijiofficial]

like let me put it all out there

until dawn is a shit excuse for a game and if you’re a fan i don’t like. hate you or anything. but i certainly don’t trust your taste in media.

i’ll start immediately with the racism. the use of native american folklore as a spooky scary plot line is already annoying as fuck, but to do it in the way supermassive does is just irresponsible. for one, just saying the creature’s name out loud MULTIPLE times despite one of the most important things being that even uttering its name invites some Real Bad Shit, yet you’re telling me this old man with a flamethrower that is supposedly native himself and an expert on these creatures would just??? carelessly say it over and over and over again? again, he’s supposed to be an expert and also native. he should KNOW to keep his mouth shut when it comes to just saying the creature’s name. and on top of that, you’re really telling me This Expert Man would die THAT easily by running after he’s just finished telling another character that the creatures can’t see you if you stand still. now let me state ahead of time that i’m white, so i do not have the experience of native people having their folklore yoinked and mishandled like this, and people who are you are free to correct me on anything i get wrong. i just feel like the handling of the creature and its lore and just kind of…. making up things (like the motion based movement) is so shitty and irresponsible. when you’re handling something like this that has significant meaning to people, you need to handle it with the utmost care and respect. there is no respect in until dawn. also worth mentioning is that the existence of the creatures feels like a half-assed secondary plot line; josh’s dumb bullshit couldn’t make a long enough game apparently, so they had to stretch it out by putting in some random Spooky Scary Monster. they’re two completely different stories that are barely connected, and the connection in the first place is flimsy as fuck

also your choices Don’t Matter. the game wants you to believe sooooo bad that choices matter, but the story doesn’t change no matter who lives or dies. the only change you experience is the interviews at the end. the story itself doesn’t change. any character who is able to be killed just stops being important or even relevant to the story at the first instance of them possibly dying because idk these devs couldn’t be bothered to properly branch anything. every scene is the same no matter who’s there. the choices get you the same reactions from the characters no matter what you do.

also. the fact that a completely innocuous choice can change whether matt wastes the flare gun on his own or not???? that’s complete bullshit. just say you hate your players.

until dawn as a game also just makes me sick. the constant jumpscares aren’t scary, they’re just fucking annoying and badly done, and the sickness doesn’t come solely from the gore, but the way it’s handled; every death except one or two is via head trauma. decapitation is all over the place, head squashing, face smashing, eye stabbing, etc etc there is just WAY too much for me to see it as scary deaths. it feels more like the devs have a massive decapitation fetish. it’s just torture porn. if i wanted torture porn i’d go read a mid rated hentai. the obsession w heads also carries over into their other games, but it’s at its most egregious here in UD. the drawn out heads getting ripped off, the lingering camera on the heads dropping to the floor with the expressions changing, its past the point of horror and firmly in the camp of Devs Obviously Jerking It To This Shit.

also if you praise anything about the gameplay i want to study you under a microscope. WHAT fucking gameplay? you just walk around, pick things up very slowly, and press buttons sometimes. yes there are good games that are just walking simulators, but my issue with UD is that it’s being advertised as this great “butterfly effect” horror adventure where choices matter and that it was exciting and fun. it is None of those things. “butterfly effect” is just a fancy way to say “we made a bunch of choices that didn’t actually matter but we want you to fall for it anyway”. there is nothing exciting about it. you don’t run from things, you don’t chase anything, you just slowly walk and sometimes hit a QTE. a walking sim indie game that tells me it’s a walking sim with a story is always going to rate higher in my books than a “game” whose advertising is a complete and utter lie.

this series of videos hits on a lot of these points and i recommend them wholeheartedly

tl;dr until dawn is a bad game and if you enjoy it you’re not terrible but you’re also ignoring a lot of passive problems and also racism. the racism is pretty bad. and so is the egregious decapitation fetish