#I’m trashing the fucking purple prose descriptions hardcore tea people use to describe fucking hot flower water

[crmsndragonwngss]

I’m so sorry if you’re a tea person, but I fucking can’t stand tea people. Everybody’s like oh try chrysanthemum tea! It helps with anxiety and helps you focus and it tastes sweet and buttery without anything in it! It doesn’t make you sleepy like chamomile and it tastes better too! No it fucking doesn’t. It tastes like I put dried flowers in hot water. It tastes like the couch at grandma’s house. It tastes like I went outside and ripped up a bunch of daisies with my bare hands and shoved them directly into my mouth. Sugar, honey, and lemon do nothing to make it taste less like a bottle of febreze. Ice makes it tolerable, but it’s still just cold, oversweet old lady perfume. Does it make me less anxious? Sure, I guess. Might be power of suggestion, might be ancient Chinese magic, I don’t fucking know. But don’t lie and say it tastes buttery and sweet and delicious without added sweeteners when it tastes exactly like every other fucking flower tea but worse cuz it’s just mild enough that I can still taste the tap water underneath it