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theetherealbloom · 6 months ago

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NORMAL THING

Summary: It's a normal thing to fall in love with movie stars.

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Age-Gap(ish), Huge Crush, kind of Power Imbalance (cause you’re a fan but nothing absolutely weird), Hurt-to-Comfort, Infatuation, Fluff, ANGST, Dog, Older Sister, COVID-19, Pandemic Era, Cheesy, Awkward, Hallmark-ish Vibes, Whirlwind, Work,

Word Count: 3k

A/N: That mf voice note-turned-song has me sobbing and dying every time I listen to it. Then I was also listening to "Normal Thing" and was like, “ohhhh this song is for me… help.” I wrote this fic in a place of just… feeling sorry…? Like apologetic that Pedro had to go through that kind of feeling all alone for a while. Anyways, there's a few sentimental moments here inspired by poetry and things I've read and learned, hope you enjoy!

Side note: I’m dyslexic and English isn’t my first language! So I apologize in advance for the spelling and/or grammatical errors. As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are always appreciated. Thank you and happy reading!

Songs: "Normal Thing" by Gracie Abrams, "Pedro" by Omar Apollo

dividers by: @/saradika-graphics

| Main Masterlist |

You had gone to visit your sister during your last summer break before graduating. Then, the second wave of COVID struck Europe, making it uncertain when you could return home. However, since all classes had shifted to online learning, the timing wasn't as critical.

Your older sister calls your name, snapping you out of the book you were absorbed in. "Hey, I’ll be out later getting groceries… do you mind taking Hershey for a walk after dinner?”

Her chocolate brown Labrador retriever, Hershey, a retired service dog, perks up at the mention of his name. You can't help but smile at his eager expression. “Yup, I can take him out later.”

She reminds you, “Don’t forget your mask!”

You playfully roll your eyes at her. “I won’t.”

Your sister thanks you and leaves for the store, leaving you alone with Hershey. You decide to take a short break from studying and take the dog for a walk around the neighborhood.

As you make your way down the quiet streets, Hershey happily sniffing at everything in sight, your thoughts drift to Pedro Pascal. Ever since watching him in The Mandalorian, you couldn't help but develop a bit of a crush on him. His charm and charisma on screen had captured your heart, making it hard for you to focus on anything else.

But it was just a normal thing, right? To have a celebrity crush? You reassure yourself as you continue walking.

You've always been drawn to movie stars and actors. Growing up, you had posters of your favorite celebrities plastered all over your bedroom walls. It was just harmless admiration, nothing more.

But with Pedro, it felt different. You found yourself constantly daydreaming about meeting him or even just catching a glimpse of him in person. You even shamefully admit that you've watched his interviews multiple times just to hear his voice.

It's ridiculous, really. You were fully aware that it was just a fantasy and that nothing would ever come out of it. And even if by some miracle you did meet him, what then? He would never be interested in someone like you - an ordinary college student from a small town.

You sigh and shake your head, trying to push away these silly thoughts as Hershey tugs at his leash to sniff at yet another tree.

But then something catches your eye - a poster for an upcoming film starring none other than Pedro Pascal himself. Your heart flutters at the sight before reality comes crashing down on you once again.

You shake your head and continue walking with Hershey, wondering when this infatuation will finally fade away.

Your older sister had always been supportive, albeit a bit concerned about your celebrity crush. "It's sweet, really," she would say with a soft smile, "but just don't lose yourself in the fantasy, okay?"

Your friends, on the other hand, found your crush hilarious. During your video calls, they would tease you mercilessly. "Come on, you'll never meet him!" one friend would laugh. "It's just a harmless crush, right?" another would add, their tone light but the message clear.

In the privacy of your room, you sometimes found yourself talking to the mirror, practicing speeches you would never give. "Hi, I'm a huge fan… and I just wanted to say..." you'd trail off, feeling foolish. You even practiced smiling and having conversations with yourself, hoping to perfect that effortless charm you admired so much in Pedro.

Yet, your self-awareness kept you grounded. You knew it was just a fantasy, a way to escape the stress of your real life. With a sigh, you would push those daydreams aside and focus on finishing your papers and remaining projects.

You wished one day to work in production, to be a part of the magic that created the worlds you loved to escape into. As you typed away on your laptop, you allowed yourself a small smile. Maybe one day, you would be behind the scenes of a film or a series. But for now, you had work to do, and dreams to turn into reality.

The sun sets late in Switzerland, casting a warm, golden glow over the tranquil residential area. You enjoy these walks, the peacefulness a stark contrast to the bustling city life you're used to.

Right after dinner, you take a stroll with Hershey, you notice a man sitting on a park bench, his shoulders slightly shaking.

Frowning, you glance down at Hershey, who looks up at you with curious eyes. Adjusting your mask, you make your way down the sidewalk, intending to walk past the stranger. But Hershey has other ideas, pulling you towards the bench with a wagging tail.

Instinctively, the man begins to pat Hershey, his touch gentle yet shaky. “Oh, Hershey, wait—” you start to say, but then you notice the tears streaming down the man's face.

You pause, feeling a pang of sympathy. “Do you mind if I sit down?” you ask, gesturing to the far end of the bench.

He looks up, eyes red and puffy, and nods. “It’s fine.”

You sit down, giving him space but staying close enough to offer comfort. You give him your name then look over to your adorably friend-shaped labrador, “And this is Hershey.”

“Pedro,” he replies, his voice barely above a whisper.

There’s a moment of silence, broken only by the soft sounds of Hershey sniffing around. Then, gently, you ask, “So… what’s on your mind?”

Pedro hesitates, struggling to find the words. “I… I don’t even know where to start.”

“I know it might seem a bit strange, but sometimes it's easier to talk to someone you don't know. No judgment, just listening,” you say, offering a reassuring smile.

He chuckles softly, a small spark of warmth in his eyes. “Maybe you’re right.”

“Besides,” you add with a playful grin, “I promise I’m a great listener. I even have a certificate in listening from my sister's dog.”

He laughs – a genuine, heartfelt laugh that seems to lift a weight off his shoulders. Your laugh follows, a sound so infectious and bright that it makes people around you feel lighter, happier.

“Your laugh,” he says, a hint of wonder in his voice. “It’s... special.”

You smile, feeling a warmth spread throughout your face and chest. “Thanks. So, Pedro, what’s been going on? Are you visiting family or…?”

“Oh, no, no. I just… I finished a job.”

“That’s nice. What do you do if you don’t mind me asking?”

He looks a little uncomfortable admitting it but he settles, “I’m um… an actor.”

You smile, your eyes crinkling as you do, “Do you like it?”

“Like what?” He asks in confusion.

“Y’know, acting?”

He takes a deep breath and begins to talk, the words spilling out in a rush. He speaks of the pressures of fame, the loneliness that comes with it, and the crushing weight of expectations. You listen intently, offering empathy and understanding.

“You know…?” he asks, surprised. “You know who I am?”

You nod and shrug. “I… I figured it out after you mentioned some of your projects.”

“You didn’t say anything?”

“I didn’t think I had to.”

Pedro looks confused for a minute, and you offer a simple smile. “I’m not famous or anything extraordinary like you. But I can only imagine how exhausting it must be, constantly looking over your shoulder. Not wanting to mess up or upset people must make you feel like you’re always on the edge, always holding your breath.”

He nods, his expression softening. “That’s exactly it.”

“I've done my fair share of pacing and reeling,” you say with a self-deprecating chuckle. “I even thought it looked cute at times. But I know there's more to life than just this feeling of uncertainty. Even though right now, it feels like there isn't any moment past this one.”

You sigh as your eyes get misty. “In the end, if any of us are going to make it, we simply have to believe. We have to believe that we aren’t alone, that people see us for who we are and what we can be. You have to visualize it; cling to whatever fills you with courage, because the world needs you here. It needs you.”

As the night wears on, you both share stories and laughter, the conversation flowing naturally. By the time you part ways, Pedro looks visibly lighter, as if a burden has been lifted from his shoulders.

Beauty no longer has an effect on Pedro. It takes more than physical appearance to impress him. Instead, it's the ability to intrigue his mind and provoke his thoughts that truly captivates him. That is what he considers someone as magic.

“Thank you,” he says sincerely. “I didn’t realize how much I needed this.”

“Anytime,” you reply. “Had a good time, but I guess I'll see ya. Take care, Pedro.”

Years later, when the world isn’t as plagued by the pandemic, you’re working in New York, living your own life but occasionally checking in on Pedro’s career through social media. He’s become a prominent figure, his face everywhere. Yet, you can’t forget the vulnerable man you met on that bench.

One night, you’re at a bar in the Bowery Hotel with friends. The atmosphere is lively, filled with laughter and chatter. As you share a joke, your laugh rings out, catching the attention of someone across the room.

Pedro looks up, his heart skipping a beat. That laugh – he knows that laugh. His eyes scan the room until they land on you, and for a moment, everything else fades away. He feels an uncanny sense of familiarity, a powerful pull towards you that he can’t quite place.

Your friends laugh at a joke you made, but your mind is already miles away. Tomorrow, you’re heading to Glendale, California, to work as a sound engineer on an upcoming project at DreamWorks Animation. The excitement and nerves flutter in your chest as you excuse yourself to start packing.

Pedro starts to make his way towards you, determined to find out if his instincts are right. Just as he’s halfway across the room, a fan stops him, asking for a picture. He smiles warmly, grateful for the support, and agrees.

“Thank you so much, Pedro! This means the world to me!” the fan gushes, snapping a quick selfie.

“No problem at all,” he replies, his gaze drifting back to where you were sitting. He quickly wraps up the conversation, eager to see you again. But when he looks back, you’re gone, as if you vanished into thin air.

Pedro’s heart sinks. He scans the room, hoping to catch another glimpse of you, but you’re nowhere to be seen.

Meanwhile, you’re outside, heading towards the subway station and waving goodbye to your friends. “I have to pack and get some sleep. My flight is early tomorrow morning,” you explain, your excitement barely contained.

Your friends hug you, wishing you luck on your new endeavor. As you descend down the stairs and board the subway train, your thoughts drift back to all those years ago, on the little bench, and now the bar, to the man whose presence had stirred something deep within you. You shake your head, putting on your headphones, distracting yourself with your favorite songs on your playlist.

Inside the bar, Pedro stands in the exact spot where he last caught a glimpse of you. A strange mix of disappointment and determination fills him, knowing he must find you again. The connection he felt was too strong to ignore – he needs to see if it was genuine or just a fleeting moment between two strangers on a park bench all those years ago.

The next day, you arrive at the DreamWorks Animation campus in Glendale, California. The excitement and nervousness intertwine as you step into the studio, ready to start your new role as a sound engineer.

Your supervisor gives you a brief overview of the project, "The Wild Robot," an animated film in production. "We need you to record and mix the voice actors' takes for each character," he explains. "Attention to detail is crucial – the right sound can bring the characters to life."

You nod, absorbing the requirements of your new role. "Got it. I'll make sure every line is perfect."

As you glance at the cast sheet for the voice actors, you notice that a few roles are still being finalized. Your mind drifts back to the previous night, to the man in the bar who looked so familiar. Shaking off the distraction, you focus on the task at hand.

Your days are filled with recording sessions and mixing tracks, immersing yourself in the world of "The Wild Robot." The work is demanding but rewarding, and you throw yourself into it with everything you have.

Despite your busy schedule, thoughts of the bench in Lucerne and the glimpse of him at the bar keep creeping back into your mind. The way Pedro had looked at you, the sense of connection you felt—it all seems so surreal now. You can’t help but wonder if you’ll ever see him again. The story you want is the story you get. Are you special, or was this all scripted in his head?

Back in his home in LA, Pedro can't shake the feeling that he needs to find you. He starts making discreet inquiries, hoping to track you down without drawing too much attention. The memory of your laughter and the warmth in your eyes keeps him going. He knows he needs to see you again, to see if what he felt was real.

As you finish another recording session, you glance at the cast sheet again. A new name catches your eye—Pedro Pascal as Fink the fox. Your heart skips a beat. Could it be him? The thought is both thrilling and terrifying.

Taking a deep breath, you try to focus on your work, but your mind keeps drifting back to the possibility. What if it really is him? What if fate has brought you together again? The anticipation builds as you wait for the next recording session, hoping that your paths will cross once more.

When the day finally arrives, you’re setting up the recording equipment, your hands trembling slightly with nervous energy. The door opens, and you hear footsteps approaching. You look up, and there he is—Pedro Pascal, standing in the doorway, looking just as surprised to see you.

“Hi,” he says, his voice soft yet filled with emotion. “It’s you.”

You smile, trying to steady your racing heart. “Yeah, it’s me. I didn’t expect to see you here. Well, I mean,” you start to fidget with your fingers, stumbling over your words, “I read the call sheet and I—”

“I didn’t expect to find you either,” he admits, taking a step closer. “But I’m glad I did.”

There’s a moment of silence, both of you taking in the significance of this unexpected reunion. Then, with a gentle smile, Pedro says, “Do you have time to catch up after this?”

You nod, feeling a rush of warmth and excitement. “I’d like that.”

As the recording session progresses, you can’t help but steal glances at Pedro, who seems equally distracted. When it’s finally over, you pack up your equipment, your heart pounding with anticipation.

Outside the studio, the two of you find a quiet corner to talk. Pedro takes your hand, his touch warm and reassuring. “I’ve thought about you a lot,” he admits. “Ever since that night in Lucerne, and then seeing you again at the bar… I knew I had to find you.”

“I’ve thought about you too,” you confess, your voice barely above a whisper. “I didn’t know if it was real or I just made it all up in my head.”

“It’s real,” Pedro says, his gaze intense and sincere. “And I want to see where this goes, if you do too.”

You smile, feeling a sense of hope and possibility. “I’d like that very much.”

The air between you and Pedro is charged with electric energy as you talk and laugh, baring your souls to each other like old friends. Time seems to stand still as you swap stories and reveal your deepest desires, the connection between you growing stronger with each passing moment. This is more than just a chance encounter; and the both of you can feel the spark of something new and thrilling forming between you.

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leahsgf · 5 months ago

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MEETING – leah williamson

leah williamson x child!reader

based on this request | bubba masterlist

love love love writing for this lil universe so please keep the requests coming

the first few weeks of your life were spent in complete bliss, leah happily soaking up every single moment between the two of you in your own little bubble - before she'd have to introduce you to the chaos that was the rest of the world.

despite the eagerness of those around her to meet you, she had strictly said no visitors until she was ready, bar her own mother, who had moved in temporarily as you both settled into this new life.

you had just hit three weeks old when leah had finally felt ready to allow a few more people into your space, having settled a little more into the swing of things and also not having the energy to turn offers down any longer.

it started off small - with her nearest and dearest, her dad, brother, grandma, and friends, of course including keira, and then gradually branched out to perhaps the most impatient of the lot, your rather large flock of aunties - also known as her teammates.

due to you being born mid season, the arsenal girls were going to be the first ones to meet you, much to the dismay of some of the lionesses especially georgia, keira obviously not helping the cause whatsoever by endlessly boasting about the fact she'd met you before any of them.

(leah would never tell a soul that keira was so nervous when she met you that she had barely held you, and instead timidly patted your head, and said it was 'nice to meet you' whilst shaking your tiny hand)

she had originally planned on hosting the weekly team night at her apartment and letting the girls all meet you there, but then went against it when she realised just how cramped her living room actually was when it held an entire very eager football team inside, alongside the fact that going out and getting some fresh air was something she desperately needed, and an escape from the newborn chaos that had taken over her home.

so, she had instead settled for arranging with jonas a day where there wasn't an awful lot of training to do and only the odd meeting or two, where she'd bring you into the training ground and introduce them to you there as a mini surprise.

after what had felt like a year of trying to get ready to leave the house, leah still adjusting to just how much stuff and preparation was needed for such a tiny little human, she finally pulled into the car park and got you both out, praising her parking job and getting you both there alive before having what felt like the battle of her life with the pram whilst getting it out.

kim, the only one of the girls who knew she was coming, and the unofficial mother figure of the team- met her outside, marvelling over you in an instant, before leading the way to the meeting room where the rest of the team were.

a collective gasp travelled across the meeting room as leah entered, with you bundled into her arms, the focus immediately off jonas’ attempted distraction ramble and all on you.

“is she seriously in an arsenal kit lee” alessia giggled, letting you clasp one of her fingers in your hand, as the rest of the team gathered around the pair of you in absolute awe.

“of course she is less! gotta teach her young haven’t i, my little gooner! especially when she’s got an uncle and grandad who are dead set on making her a spurs fan - so who wants a hold first?” the blonde replied, switching the conversation and ignoring the laughter and the teasing remarks about her passion for her club, instead letting them fight over who got to hold you first.

you had been pretty fussy in everyone’s arms apart from your mother’s, not being a huge fan of the unfamiliarity and all of the sudden movement when being passed around the room, until beth had insisted on viv holding you despite how nervous she had been, and your grizzles had settled almost instantly, and your frown which was the carbon copy of your mother’s faded.

“hi schatje, i’m your auntie viv, we love you so much already.” she murmured, stroking your cheeks ever so softly as you stared back up at her, still in the phase where you were fascinated by the world around you.

you beamed as she tickled your nose, your first official, non wind related smile that leah had been desperate to coax out of you for weeks now.

“looks like vivi is a natural! even baby williamson can sense that she’s a goat!” katie grinned, forever the leader of the ‘miedema fan club’, leaning on the dutch woman’s shoulder and poking her tongue out at you.

“welcome to the one of your forever homes my girl. you’re so so loved already.” leah whispered to you, cradling you and embracing the moment of peace she had after stepping away from the chaos in order to settle you down in your pram - allowing kyra and vic, who you’d undoubtedly overtake in maturity at some point, to take you on a walk around with steph’s supervision for your nap.

#arsenal wfc x reader #woso x reader #lionesses x reader #woso imagine #leah williamson x reader #leah williamson #leah williamson imagine #leah williamson x child reader #arsenal wfc x child reader #vivianne miedema x child reader #katie mccabe x child reader

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cosmicpearlz · 5 months ago

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fragile hearts

summary: two public figures that try to navigate their relationship with such hectic schedules. at some point, it was bound to come crashing down, right?

pairing: jude bellingham x singer!reader

valentine's day, cryin' in the hotel

i know you didn't mean to hurt me,

so i kept it to myself.

meeting jude had been a complete accident. you had a show in madrid, causing some of the players from real madrid to go. he happened to be one of them, along with vinicius, brahim and eduardo. naturally, you invited them backstage because you were a fan of the well-known football team. jude couldn't take his eyes off of you. memorized by the way you performed on stage. the confidence that flowed from you with every word you sang.

it's been a year since you first met. being boyfriend and girlfriend hasn't always been easy, because of the fact that you guys have to do long distance but you made it work.

"baby!" you yelled across the house, rushing to find jude. you found him sitting on the bed, watching tv. he looks up towards the door when you came running in.

"what's going on sunshine?" you jumped on him and hugged him tightly. jude chuckles, while wrapping his arms around you just as tight.

"i was just asked to perform in barcelona! they have a festival going on and want me to perform."

"that's amazing baby. when is it?"

"on the fourteenth." jude's eyebrows furrowed.

"on valentines day?"

"yeah."

"i have a match that day. you said you would come." he slowly removing his arms from around your waist. you tilt your head in confusion and sit up in his lap.

"i didn't think it would be a problem. i'm at almost all of your matches."

"why didn't you ask?"

"why do i have to? this is huge for my career for them to even want me there."

jude taps your leg gently, making you get out of his lap. in a way, you felt hurt. this was suppose to be a happy moment for you and your boyfriend wasn't being as supportive.

"well congratulations i guess," he grabs his phone and walks out. you sit there dumbfounded at his behavior. you would've never treated him like that. why couldn't he be supportive of this great opportunity?

the days leading up to the date were quiet. it was like a switch flipped off in jude. you guys went from spending pretty much every waking moment together to not even having a conversation that lasted more than five minutes. feeling like strangers rather than boyfriend and girlfriend.

you woke up before jude, knowing he had to leave early and decided to cook him breakfast for valentine's day as a surprise. cooking everything you knew he liked and plated it nicely. you almost couldn't contain the smile that was forming on your face. awkward phase or not, jude was the love of your life and that wasn't going to change.

"good morning baby! happy valentine's day," you walked in the room, finding him siting up against the headboard. you handed him one of the plates and sat across from him on the bed.

"happy valentine's day m'love. thank you for breakfast," jude leans forward and places kisses to your cheek and lips.

"i wanted to do something special for you. oh, plus, i have another surprise for you after my set." the boy's mood was quick to turn sour once again.

"I have my match, remember? oh yeah, you don't care enough to remember."

"jude," you sighed and placed your plate in your lap. "your match is at 10 am and then my set is at 6 pm."

"why can't you come to the match then?"

"they want me there early. i'm sorry babe."

"yeah whatever," he goes to eating the rest of his breakfast in silence.

"please don't spend the rest of our morning like this." you were met with silence, leaving you no choice but to wallow in it. "can you come to my set?" you quietly asked, hoping the answer would be yes even though he's upset. you guys were each others good luck charm.

"we'll see."

"jude, please don't be like that."

"i said, i'll see if i can make it. i don't know what you want me to say," he gets out of bed and makes his way to the kitchen. leaving you behind with a ache in your chest.

"i just wanted you to say that you'll be there," mumbling to yourself, you get up and follow him to the kitchen. jude stood over the sink washing the dishes that was left from you cooking. you slide your plate and fork in the sink, wrapping your arms around his waist after.

"if you can't make it, i understand. just please come to the hotel that my team has me in. i really do have a surprise for you."

"okay." you placed a kiss to his shoulder blade and unwrapped yourself from him, giving him space.

you were buzzing for the rest of the day. excited that your boyfriend's team won the match and this was your first time performing in barcelona. you texted jude, congratulating him on the win. as you were getting dressed, you were hoping that jude would be there in the crowd. especially since madrid was only a six hour drive away from barcelona.

"you ready rockstar?" you excitedly nodded at your manger kate. she gave you a high five and patted your back. you gave her one last smile, before letting the stage production guide you to the stage.

"hello barcelona! thank you, thank you, thank you for inviting me to play," the screams from the crowd making your heart warm. "i'm so excited to play for you all. let's get started, yeah?"

jude watched as you danced around the stage. it reminded him of the first time you guys met. he always loved seeing you in your element. absolutely letting go and just being yourself, while you sang. the boy started to feel guilty about not being happy for you when you first told him the news. he was being petty and reminded himself to apologize when he sees you backstage.

"i love you guys so much. thank you for being here and inviting me! goodnight barcelona," you blew a kiss and waved, as you walked off the stage.

there jude stood with a bouquet of your favorite flowers. you jumped into his arms, pulling him down into a tight hug. he didn't hesitate to wrap his arms around your waist.

"you did so good baby. i'm unbelievably proud of you."

"i can't believe you made it."

"i was dick but i could never miss this moment. love seeing you on stage," jude places kisses all over of your face, causing you to giggle uncontrollably. you pushed his head away and smiled.

"i still have a surprise for you! we should get going."

"after you m'lady," jude dramatically bows as you lead the way. you were excited to finally have a conversation that lasted more than five minutes. going back to the way you guys were before.

"okay, so i worked really hard on this. i wanted to do this as a 'i'm sorry for missing your match'. i really hope you like-" you were cut off by jude's phone ringing. he took the phone out of his pocket and answered it immediately.

"nah, I'm not busy at all," your brows furrowed hearing him say that. it felt like a punch to your gut. as if you weren't showing him the surprise you had been planing for weeks. it takes a couple minutes before he gets off the phone.

"i'm sorry babe, i have to go."

"what?"

"the team wanted to go out to celebrate the win. i'll be back before midnight. i love you," jude kissed your lips and then moved to place one to your forehead as well. he was already walking away before you could get another word in. sighing to yourself, you walked into your hotel room.

you had the room decorated with balloons and rose petals everywhere. figuring that because it was valentine's day, he deserved something nice. instead, you were in the room alone. hoping that he'll be back before midnight like he promised.

he wasn't there. didn't answer a text message nor any of your calls. you waited, watching the time go by quickly. this was enough to make you question your relationship. jude was usually really good with his promises. did he do this on purpose because you missed the match?

"happy valentine's day jude," you whisper to yourself, drinking from the bottle of champagne you bought for your shared time together.

you silently cried to yourself as you watched the clock hit one o'clock in the morning. you felt so alone and unwanted. jude would rather spend time with his teammates than his own girlfriend. maybe the long distance wasn't working for him anymore. maybe he was still being petty. all you knew was that you were hurt. even crying didn't ease the pain that lingered in your chest.

#jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham #jude bellingham one shot #jude bellingham angst #singer!reader #jude bellingham imagine

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4m1rz · 7 months ago

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Pool Relieve

TripleS Yooyeon x Male Reader

Tags: pool sex, mommy kink, creampie

If you have the opportunity to be close with your favourite member in your favourite group, what would you do? How would you feel?

Well, this incident happens to Do Kangdae. He is a very huge fan of Kim Yooyeon since she was in the survival show, My Teenage Girl. He watched every single episode of the show until the final episode as she wasn't able to be in the debut lineup. He feels devastated as his favourite girl couldn't make it to the debut lineup as he puts his efforts in voting for her in every single episode.

One day, he scrolls on his Twitter account and sees a notification that Yooyeon will be joining a group called tripleS. And obviously, his feelings went to the roof and he's hoping that she will be able to debut. By the time when the group’s first subunit makes it debut, he is so enthralled especially since Yooyeon is in the sub-unit.

As the time passes by, it's already the comeback season with the group having a new sub-unit called “EVOLution”. Kangdae bought as many of the albums as possible, hoping that he'll be able to get the ticket for their upcoming fan meeting. Luckily for him, he received a message noting that he is invited to the fan meeting that's gonna be held on Saturday. This makes him feel very ecstatic.

Fast forward to the fan meeting day, he arrives at the venue of the fan meeting 3 hours before the event begins. Some WAVs, which is the fandom name for tripleS, can be seen outside the venue. When he enters, more fans can be seen, waiting for the fan meeting event to start. He then goes to one of the seats that are still available before sitting on it and starts to make conversations with those who are sitting beside him.

Three hours later, the fan meeting event begins. All members in the subunit “EVOLution” walk one at a time towards the center of the stage. This causes an eruption of cheers coming from the fans. This includes Kangdae, but his eyes are only focused on the only member that gets his full attention, which is of course, Kim Yooyeon.

After some interactions and performances from the members, it is time for the fans to meet and greet with one member at a time. All of the fans, including him, start to line up before interacting with every member. As he lines up, he noticed the arrangement of the members and was shocked to see that his ultimate bias is the first one.

A few minutes later, it was his turn to interact with Yooyeon. He sits on the chair while facing her and starts greeting her. “Hi there. May I know what your name is?” She asks. “Y-Yeah, s-sure. My n-name is Do Kangdae. Nice to m-meet you.” He answers, despite the multiple stuttering as he's really nervous.

His reaction causes Yooyeon to giggle a little as she finds it cute. “I wonder… if you are this nervous because of me?” She asks him while being curious. This makes him feel a bit more embarrassed and also guilty at the same time. “S-Sorry, I didn't mean it… in a bad way. I am indeed n-nervous… because I'm facing my ultimate b-bias right now.”

The statement from him makes her gasp in amazement. “Oh really, I'm your ultimate bias? Since when?” She excitedly asks which makes him blush even more. “Erm, it was since when you're still in that show, ‘My Teenage Girl’.” He answers, which leads to her gasp yet again. She wouldn't guess that someone has been her fan from when she was in that survival show up until now. They both had a bit more conversation before he was forced to move to the next member.

After that, he goes to meet and have a conversation with the other members. This time, it went out pretty smoothly than during his conversation with Yooyeon. After he finished, he went back to his seat and waited until all the other fans had finished meeting every member. Once all fans have done the meet and greet session, the members then resumed with the performance. During the last performance, he noticed that Yooyeon gave a wink in his direction.

This causes the fans in that particular place to start to cheer loudly. However, he feels as if she is winking to one particular person, but isn't sure whether it's actually for her fanpage or him. After a couple of minutes later, it's the end of the fan meeting event. All of the members then line up into a straight line before bowing down and thanking the fans to join the event before leaving the stage, one member at a time.

This causes the fans to slowly exit the venue, which includes Kangdae. As he was about to exit the venue, he got stopped by two bodyguards that were behind the members earlier. He feels scared at that moment as he thought he did something back then. However, one of the two bodyguards says that two people want to meet him backstage. He just agrees and follows the bodyguards backstage.

As he and the bodyguards arrive backstage, he is shocked to see Yooyeon and another lady who he believes is the group's manager. Then, the manager asks the two bodyguards to let only the three of them be in the room, to which the bodyguards comply and leave the room. After that, she starts to explain what is actually happening.

“Greetings. I'm Boo Chowon, the manager for not just this subunit, but also the whole tripleS…” The manager first starts introducing herself to Kangdae, which indeed concludes his thought of her being the manager. “…I'm so sorry that I drag you here, but Yooyeon has something to talk about to you.” She continues talking before turning her attention to Yooyeon.

As he and the manager look at Yooyeon, she chuckles a little before talking. “Well, I asked Chowon unnie earlier if I can make you my own personal manager.” She says, looking at him. That statement makes him stunned, which makes her giggles even more seeing his reaction. “...but before that, I want to apologize to you first…” She continues talking, but her sudden apology makes him confused.

“You see, I once encountered your fanpage about me on Twitter. I was so amazed to see someone supporting me since that survival stage era. However, I also… accidentally saw your personal account since there's also the link for it and I accidentally clicked on it. So, I'm so sorry yet again.” She continues explaining while putting her hands close as a sign to apologize. The first thing he did after hearing her explanation was to grab her hand and push it down.

“I-It’s fine. Besides, I actually wanna put the link for my personal account on the fanpage account as I want to have more fans as my friends. I didn't expect my ultimate bias would encounter that fanpage.” He says and chuckles, which makes her sigh in relief and smiles. “So, is this why I'm being your personal manager? You're hoping to compensate for your mistake?” He then asks her.

Just before she is able to answer the question, Chowon cuts her through it. “Basically that, but also because she grows fond of you because of how strongly you've been supporting her. After seeing you just now during the fan meeting, she constantly talks about the topic of letting you be her personal manager to me.” She says, which makes Yooyeon nod before covering her face with her hands. This reaction of hers makes him chuckle a bit more.

“Well then, I accept the offer of being her personal manager. This is a once in a lifetime experience, but I promise I'll do my best to be a great manager to Yooyeon.” He says and gives a salute to the two ladies. Chowon nods while Yooyeon giggles to see that response from him. “Ok then, your job starts right now, after I leave the room right… now.” Chowon says and leaves the room after, leaving just him and Yooyeon.

“I guess we will introduce ourselves first then. I'll start. My name is Kim Yooyeon. I was born on 9th February 2001 and I live in Seoul. I studied at Ewha University, so you might know my nickname then, right?” She introduces herself and gives a wink to him at the last part. “I guess it's my turn then. My name is Do Kangdae. I was born on 8th June 2002. I was raised in Busan, but now I'm living here in Seoul. I study at Yonsei University, in a sports science program. Pleasure meeting you.” He properly introduces himself to her.

“Ah, so I'm your noona then?” She asks, to which he nods. “Did you go to the gym a lot?” She asks again and he responds back with a nod. “Ah, no wonder you have this buff physique, yet you are being shy earlier at the fanmeeting.” She says while giving a teasing smirk which makes him scratch the side of his head in embarrassment.

“Now, I guess you wanna ask me to stay at the dorm. However, I believe my place and your dorm is around the neighborhood.” He says. His statement shocks her as if he knows what she just wants to ask him. “So noona, wanna go to your dorm now?” He asks her, to which she nods. They then walk towards his car and start going towards the dorm of tripleS members.

After several minutes later, they arrive at the dorm. “Well, we're here. I'll see you tomorrow then, my new manager.” She says. “Yeah, sure. Want me to-” He replies, but stops as he feels his cheek get kissed by her before turning his head towards her in a shocked expression. This makes Yooyeon giggles and smirks. “See you, handsome.” She says again before getting out of the car and going towards the dorm building. He is only able to shake his head, feeling disbelief on the action she did earlier before starting to drive back home.

That's how Kangdae became from being just a fan to being one of the tripleS managers, but specifically, the manager of his ultimate bias. He has been doing what his job suggests, planning her schedule with the company and accompanying her in her activities. However, despite all this, it seems that she also pampers him by buying him stuff and not letting him pay for it, even if he tells her that he wants to pay for it. This also results with them being a lot intimate and secretly being a couple.

This situation also seems to be the change of the dynamics between them. One day, he jokingly said that he should call her ‘mommy’ instead of ‘noona’ due to her acting like one towards him. He thought that she would feel disgusted with it, but instead she had this wicked grin visible on her face. “Oh really? Well, I don't mind it. Besides, you sound so sexy saying that word, Kangdae.” She says and gives him a sultry wink. This change of dynamics also results with both of them able to have their own personal fun and fulfill their sexual needs.

Fast forward to today, which is October 25th, they have finished with the Australia World Tour and every member and staff have some free time to spend before going back to Korea. Kangdae has been planning to just go to the nearest bar and just have some drinks. However, as he is going to the bathroom to clean himself, his phone starts to vibrate multiple times. He then checks the phone to see several messages from Yooyeon.

[Mommy Yoo❤️]

Meet me at the hotel private pool at 8.00 p.m.

Don't be late, or mommy would punish you 😉

He chuckles seeing her messages, knowing that her threats were always a bluff. However, he thinks that it would be a good idea to be able to hangout with her as they both have been busy for the 3 days of the world tour. He also thinks whether he and Yooyeon would do some naughty stuff or not later on.

Later on, he arrives at the hotel’s private pool which is located quite far from the hotel rooms. He scans around the place and sees someone already in the pool. He walks closer towards the pool to see that the one asking him to come to the place has already been waiting for him at the poolside, wearing a black swim dress with white ribbon straps.

“Hey there, my beloved noona.” He says, indicating her of his arrival. This makes her tilt her head, seeing him which then she gives him a naughty grin. “You're late, baby. You make mommy wait for you for 5 minutes. You really want mommy to punish you?” She says while adding a smirk after the last sentence.

Her statement makes him chuckle a bit. “Oh please, mommy… We both know that your threats of punishing me is always a bluff. By the way, I see that you've dipped in the pool, huh?” He says and also asks as he notices the swim dress that she's wearing is already wet, to which she nods.

“Yeah, I went for a swim just now, just waiting for you to arrive.” She retorts back and gives him a playful glare which makes him chuckle even more. “Now, do you want to join mommy in the pool or not?” She asks him once again to which he nodded.

“Great then. Now take off your clothes.” She says to him before plunging herself into the pool once more. “Really mommy? Do you really want me to take off my clothes right here with you looking?” He asks, trying to argue. “As if you haven't done that in front of mommy before, baby…” She retorts his argument and gives him yet another smirk.

He sighs in defeat before starts taking off his clothes until he is left with just his swimming trunks. As she notices a slight tent forming at his swimming trunks, this makes her to smirk even more and looks intently at his crotch region. He notices where she's looking at which makes him chuckle and mumbles the word ‘naughty’. Then, he gets into the pool and joins her by hugging her close.

“It's been awhile since we get to be like this huh, mommy?” He asks which she nods as an answer. They stay in that position for another 10 minutes before he feels her grinding her crotch region with his.

“Mommy, are you horny already? I thought you wanted us to go for a swim first.” He taunts her. There's no reply from her other than soft moans coming out from her mouth for 5 minutes. After that, she tries to answer his question despite her still moaning and grinding.

“Mmmmh, I am, baby… After all, w-we haven't been with each… mmmh… other. Mommy believes t-that you also want me r-right now.” Her answer makes him chuckle and shake his head. After that, he slithers one of his hands towards under the swim dress until he feels her pussy. Once he feels her pussy, he starts to rub it which makes her moan a bit louder.

“Mmmmh, t-that’s it baby. G-Gosh, this is just only y-your fingers, what if it's your dick inside me, mmmmmh…” She exclaims. Then, she responds by moving her left hand towards the inside of his swimming trunks until she reaches his dick and grips it before slowly stroking it. This causes him to groan softly yet hoarsely right towards her ear.

As things getting heated between the two with them pleasuring each other, he couldn't wait to fuck her which makes him to stop rubbing her pussy. This makes her confused as she was actually getting close to orgasm. “W-Why did you stop? Mommy's close…” She whines.

“S-Sorry mommy, but I can't wait any longer.” He exclaims. After saying that, he yanks his swimming trunks down a little to release his hard dick, then pulls up one of her legs before pushing his dick into her pussy. This causes them to moan due to the pleasure of both sexual parts and also the pressure from the pool water.

“Oh god, mmmmh… Mommy's pussy still feels so… tight. The water also makes the feel of your pussy even better, mommy.” He says. After a few minutes later, he pulls out his dick until his tip remains before pushing it back inside which leads to him thrusting inside her pussy. However, the pressure from the pool's water makes it a bit harder for him to thrust his dick.

“Mmmmh, I've b-been craving for this, baby. Mommy has been… mmmmh… waiting to get that dick of yours. So p-please, ruin mommy's pussy.” She says to him, the pleasure feeling seeps all over her body. Suddenly, he stops thrusting which makes her puzzled yet for another time. “B-Baby, why did you stop t-thrusting? M-Mommy wants m-more.” She whines.

Her whines didn't get any reply from him, instead he lifted her up a little which made her wrap her legs around his waist. Then, he carries her towards the pool wall and pins her towards it before resumes thrusting his dick inside her pussy, but a bit more harder. This action makes her squeal loudly as she didn't expect it.

“Oh, mmmmh… My baby is such a t-tease… Mommy l-loves it though… mmmmh…” She says, followed with laces of moans. As he is still thrusting, he lifts her a little and gets his hands to untie the straps of her swim dress. Once that is done, he tugs down the swim dress to reveal her modest tits before starting to play with them.

“Mmmmh, mommy loves it when you play with my tits, baby. It makes mommy… mmmh… even more aroused.” She says gleefully. This makes him attack her tits even more, with the combination of sucking, groping, tweaking and biting while still thrusting his dick.

After 5 more minutes later, both of them are at the brink of cumming. He really wants to cum inside her as it's been their habit of finishing their sex session. However, he thinks that he should get her consent to do so which makes him do just that.

“M-Mommy, I'm c-close. Can I c-cum inside you, mmmmh?” He asks. Her reaction is to just nod aggressively before answering him. “M-Mommy is close t-too. Luckily, today is mommy's safe day, so y-you can cum i-insi- oh gosh, mmmmh!!!”

As soon hearing her answer and not letting her finish it, he unloads all of his cum deep inside her pussy which triggers her to cum as well. After he believes that he has fully unloaded his cum deep inside her, he slowly pulls out his dick as well as lifting her. This causes a little bit of their mixed cum to spill out from her pussy.

Then, they both hug each other once more for another 5 minutes to relax themselves before she suddenly hits his chest playfully. “Yah, you're such a naughty boy. You didn't notice mommy that you're about to cum.” She says which makes him chuckle. “Hehe, sorry mommy. I was so eager to hear your approval that I just cummed on the spot and forgot to tell you. Well, you did like it didn't you, mommy?” He answers back.

His answer makes her giggle and shake her head. “Yeah, I miss this feeling of you cumming inside me. Now, shall we have a swim this time?” She says to which he answers with a nod. Then, they let go of the hug before fixing their garments; or more so taking off the remaining clothes left which makes both of them skinny dipping. After that, they start to do swimming and playing in the water before leaving an hour later.

P/S: Welp, the inevitable incident has happened... Idk why, but that photo really fuels me up to make a smut for her even if I don't want to 🥲. Still, I hope you all enjoy reading it

#triples yooyeon #triples smut #yooyeon smut #kpop smut

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somerandomdere · 8 months ago

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Yandere! actor x crew member! g/n reader

tags: fluff, slight? yandere themes (duh), you can tell I don't know much about how hollywood scandal works, it's my first fic pls feedback

Fame was everything to Gabriel, it's been his whole life. He was a nepo baby, he has seen the cameras the moment he was born. Blessed with a good face, filthy rich parents, and a flirtatious personality, he was everything ladies wanted in a man.

Until everything came crashing down.

He got into a huge scandal he wasn't even aware of. He was accused of sexually harassing a fellow co actress, when in fact he never laid a finger on her. Sure, he was a well known celebrity and has a history of sleeping around, but that doesn't mean he will force himself on someone without consent!

The scandal got so big he was defamed everywhere. His sponsors withdrew, his parents and friends wanted to cut ties with him, and his girlfriend cussed him out before leaving.

It wasn't him! But at this point, no one believed in him. He started being depressed, having suicidal thoughts, and contemplating on quitting his dream career.

Enter you. Beautiful, radiant you.

After a long day of carrying heavy sets and helping out around the set. You were exhausted, so you went out to breathe some fresh air and smoke. As you lit up your cigarette, the main actor of your current show, Gabriel, seemed to be crying. You wanted to smoke, but you couldn't just leave a crying man alone! and you did want some privacy while taking a puff

"Hey... you alright?" You genuinely asked.

You didn't know much about Gabriel's scandal, since you weren't very interested in the affairs of celebrities and thought that fans should just mind their own business.

And you were just here to make extra money, what's the worst that could happen? You'll be gone in no time anyways. He'll just quickly forget you.

"Hey um..." You started awkwardly, and cleared your throat. "I may not be the best person that can comfort, but you can talk to me. I'll listen."

You thought he would be suspicious of you, because of his celebrity status, but he ranted to you and cried. How he was misunderstood. How the people closest to him never believed in him. How he felt so hopeless after he lost everything.

You reached out to touch his hand. You let him know you understood. How painful this period of life will be and how it will all be fine after.

You told him to take a look around him. Look through a different scope, see the people who actually cares for him. You told him how your uncle never believed any of those rumors and took advantage of this to hire him.

He teared up, not from self pity this time, but from realisation. Maybe he should abandon those people who never saw his true self anyways. For the first time, he looked into your eyes. The sunlight danced over your eyes, it reminded him of the warmth his parents used to give him, before they got too busy.

Maybe that's when he fell for you. He couldn't really point out when he fell head over heels, but he can kinda figure he feelings sprouted here.

He came back, stronger than ever. His acting caused your uncle's movie grossing to skyrocket. It hit the box office, everyone was talking about his movie through social media, how he so accurately acted his role, to the point they shivered. He decided to take this opportunity to clear his name. Due to the how overwhelmingly successful his new movie was, people decided to believe him.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Y/N! My name was cleared!" He squealed into the phone. You sincerely felt happy for him and offered to celebrate with him.

He wouldn't let this opportunity go without a waste! He immediately said yes. He wanted to see your beautiful face again, and finally ask you out.

He will finally be yours, and you will finally be his.

@hana-no-seiiki

@lovverletters

@moyazaika

@yxami

@mightypossibly

@suiana

My inspos on how to write fics (and my fav fic writers!) PLS PLS PLS PLS GIVE ME FEEDBACKKK

#male yandere #male yandere cafe #yandere actor #gn reader #yandere celebrity x gn reader #first post #idk what else to tag #i'm actually shaking

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evilminji · 10 months ago

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Okay, but... now I'm wondering >.>

@the-witchhunter We talked about Danny being Morningstar's feral, probably engineering oils and ectoplasmic goo covered, mad scientist/himbo hybrid (attack) purse dog. His special lil guy.

But!

I seek your Knowledge(TM).

From second hand accounts? He seems to HATE the hypocrisy. The blaming HIM for humanity's own choices. The rat race and endless song n dance of "Righteous Good VS. Cartoonish Evil". Because it let's humanity paint themselves the helpless victims. Because it's all surface level. Because it is not so easy to escape the ugliness of your Sins, yet they keep trying to scapegoat him.

Fuck um.

He was tired of it.

But? He still has CONSIDERABLE POWER. It's probably written down. And the Ring Of Rage? Is proooobably not the loveliest of artifacts? I imagine, like the Crown, it's NOT leaving Danny alone. One of those "we don't CARE if there is no throne left to sit upon, you WILL wear us, as King" sort of systems.

It genuinely would not and DOES NOT matter, if not a single soul in all the Zone bows to him. Did he defeat the previous holder of their Right To Rulership? Yes or No.

If No, fuck off.

If Yes, new monarch.

Is it hurting him? Not the rings problem. Nor the Crown's. Heavy is the weight, etc etc. But! DANNY would certainly care. He is... is ANGRY all the time now. Has no idea who would even MAKE this bullshit ring. Why JUST Rage? Yeah, it makes ghosts stronger, but at what COST?

He can't even get rid of it!

......by himself.

Luckily, he's still clear headed enough to know that he's NOT in this by himself. And it's amazing what "mom, dad, this ring is trying to drive me insane. Help me" in a terrified and tearful voice, can brush over. No one threatens their baby and all that.

It would honestly be hilarious, seeing the extended Fenton clan decend like LOCUSTS on Pariahs Keep, searching for clues, terrifying the local ghosts, if... if he wasn't so tired.

God he's so tired.

It's Aunt Alecia who... "politely encourages" a passing scholar to lend them the book they need. Took the poor sucker right out of the sky. Guy never stood a chance. RIP.

He learns he has to head..... over? Like... 27 that-ish way, then up. Huh. 27 WHAT?

Realities, apparently. He's in the wrong bundle. Branch? Neighborhood? Eh. Clan Fenton rolls back out, he packs his bags, and hilariously enough? Goes off to the devils night club. Hopes he likes rings. Or hates them.

Thankfully, being "king" means the Zone? Kinda... humors him? Like... it still has RULES(tm). He can... can FEEL that now. But it's willing to bend some for him, if he asks. And anything NOT against the rules? If it's in the right mood? He need only ask. It's weird. Being suddenly so powerful, yet NOT, at the same time.

Cause none of it's his.

All he has is the Zone's attention. The ability to ask pretty please. If you don't mind. And then? The highways between... ALL will just? Shift and change for him. He can see how it went to Pariah's head. The Zone is pretty agreeable. Is by nature Amoral, cause it's not a Being, it's... well, it's the Zone.

And everyone wants him to ask things. Do things. Demand this or that. Use this power.

Maybe he doesn't WANT too! Maybe he didn't WANT to be king! Doesn't he have the right to say NO? To refuse? Why do they think he OWES them service? An eternity of politics and people trying to kill him, for something he never wanted in the FIRST PLACE.

He's so tired.

The nightclub's pretty cool.

So he comes to ask, politely of course, cause the guy's probably busy, if Morningstar could... dunno, fix or destroy it? Want a ring, maybe? Also he heard you MADE the stars. Huge fan of all of that. Can I ask about the process? Or are you in the middle of something?

And? Lucifer? Turns around, from where he's Leaning Seductive Yet Elegantly(tm) to see... scrawny. Tiny corpse child. No... half? Corpse? Alive. Dying. Alive yet dying. Huh. Well, that is different. And here he didn't think he'd get see anything NEW. You, child, are NOT a zombie. What are you?

Halfa.

I have no idea what that is. What do you want?

He gets shown the ugliest, crudest, peice of shit ring imaginable. A genuine foul little curse. Really stinks up the place. He destroys it, obviously. This club has STANDARDS. Hope that wasn't important?

Kid just smiles the biggest fangy lil grin. No. No it was not.

Obvious, lie, but cute lil teeth. He'll allow it.

He gets dragged into talking about the stars. And talking. And talking. Mostly bragging and explaining. Kid hangs off his every word. Follows him around as he makes his rounds. Asks good questions. Completely focused, dispite the booze and barely dressed dancing all around him.

Lucifer can't help notice the crown.

Lovely little thing. Space ice and star dust, glittering like jewels and light catching the mist. If he remembers right... that one iiiiiis..... not Limbo, it's.... Zone! That crown is the Zone, it changes to suit the wearer. He recognizes the vibe. Awfully young, aren't you?

And.... it all burst forth. He didn't even need to press. Use persuasive words and honeyed tones. Like an inflamed, festering wound. The merest brush is enough to spill everything.

Negligence, greed, blood lust. Bigotry and xenophobia. A tyrants endless quest for power. Ah, humans. They truly don't change do they? Realities away, dead or alive. Now they're harrasing a child. He honestly looks miserable. Whereas just a moment before, listening to Lucifer talk about his work on the stars, his soul practically GLOWED with light. A tiny little star unto himself.

.......maybe it's the big ol "I'm you BIGGEST FAN" eyes. The sad wet cat aura. Perhaps the scrawny "could snap you like a twig" teenager, all elbows and knees. The fact he is, in fact, NOT human; for all that he once was. But?? The kid? Is... not terrible company.

He'd even go so far as to say? It's like having a pet intern.

He can sleep on the couch.

Tell you what, you stay here? I'll keep taking about stars and YOU can do the chores I don't feel like doing. I'll take care of you and all that.

And Danny? Honestly was sold at the word "stars" but? This sounds like a phenomenally terrible idea... and he has yet to meet one of THOSE he hasn't made out sloppy still with, so deal! But as a minor, that DOES make you his new gaurdian for the next four-ish years. He's legally obligated to finish schooling.

Ah.

.....well shit.

(Just? Local stressed 14-15 year old Ghost King does RESPONSIBILE thing and finds Adultier Adult. With more qualified Adult powers. Unfortunately for everyone, the adult is Lucifer Morningstar, night club owner. Even MORE Unfortunately, said ghost kind has pack bonded with the Nice Star Man, who saved him from the Bad Ring, and effectively offered to let him crash on his swanky couchs.

Now Morningstar has to? Somewhat VAGUELY pretend he gives a shit local schooling system, as he puts his charge INTO it. Actively giving waking terrors to the magical community. What evil plot is afoot? Where did he get this tiny minor death god? What is his end goal FOR said child?

No one knooooows~

But Lucifer is just doing this cause he's a Being of his word. He hates the tedious minor chores he'll be foisting off onto Danny. And? Most importantly? Look at that face. *shoujo sparkly eyes of Star Sempai Noticed Me!* it's like having a golden retriever puppy. Ffs he has STANDARDS.)

(It'd be hilarious to watch the hostile 5th dimensional chess DC characters have going on in the background, all while? Danny is like? Man! Isn't this universe GREAT? Everyone here is so CHILL! And nice to me! I'm so relaxed now! Finally, I can finish my education in peace.)

@hdgnj @hypewinter @lolottes @babbling-babull @nerdpoe @mutable-manifestation

#dpxdc #dp x dc #dc x dp #dcxdp #dc x dp prompt #danny phantom #tw wounds #but only as euphemism for emotional state

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megalony · 28 days ago

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Watch Your Back

This is a new Dark! Evan Buckley imagine, requested by anon. I hope you will all like this one, please let me know what you think.

Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyje @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @kyky9103 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra848484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17

@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella @eleventhdoctorsangel @kniselle @senjoritanana @shauna-carsley @dottierose @cfdhouse51 @darkfemme1 @rainechase45 @lolalolsstuff @jupiter1700 @ashdoctor @an-aliens-ghost @lunaroserites @houseoftwistedspirits @callsignwidow @winterreader-nowwriter @reneinii @bellsbomb @western-pyro @itsgigikay @harry-satellite @midsummereve1993 @babyqueen17 @buckyyyismahhlife @sammiejane22 @mrsyixingunicorn10 @op-81-lvr-reblogs

Dark! Evan Buckley Masterlist

Part 2

Part 3

Summary: Being type one diabetic, (Y/n) relies on Evan for a lot of things, and it makes him very protective over her. Especially when they visit her family, and her sister tries to cause chaos and friction.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A sigh tumbled past Evan's lips when they exited the building. He was pretty sure that Bobby and Eddie had the fire under control by now, the building was almost completely put-out and everyone had been evacuated.

It hadn't been a huge fire, the first two floors, to be exact, but they had to evacuate everyone and keep them out until the building was declared safe again.

At least they didn't have many injured to take care of, they only needed a small medical area set up to the left of the building. There were less than ten people that needed medical assistance.

Tilting his head back, Evan pushed his helmet further back on his head and did a quick sweep of his surroundings. He wasn't too sure what Bobby wanted him to do now. He had evacuated the building, everyone was safe. Did he go and help at the medical tent? Did he do a second check of the building? Did he start packing the equipment up?

He took the time to remove his gloves and stuff them into his jacket pocket. Now the fire was out, Evan wasn't in danger of getting burns and the gloves were restrictive, he hated wearing them.

When he glanced around, his head tilted at an angle and he couldn't prevent his eyes from locking onto a certain figure.

She was stood on the pavement, as close to the building as she could get without risking her safety.

There was a certain look in those deep pooling eyes that made Evan shake to his core. There was something about her that was drawing him in. Maybe she had an aura that was reaching out to him. Maybe it was just her presence and the tender expression on her face that made her look sweet compared to this dull, dark situation.

Evan wasn't sure what it was, but something was edging him towards her. He found himself removing the oxygen tank from his back and setting it on the floor by the truck so he wasn't being weighed down anymore and he was free to move.

His boots clunked against the pavement, harsh enough that it should have left indents in the concrete as he trudged towards her.

She looked like she needed something.

The girl was watching the scene with interest, her eyes were constantly flitting from the truck to the building and back around to everyone coming in and out of the building. But it didn't look like she was searching or waiting for someone in particular. Evan had seen plenty of people desperate to find friends and loved ones and make sure they were safe, and this girl didn't have that desperation about her.

But she was dithering from foot to foot with both arms deadlocked around her chest and a nervousness about her that was endearing. There was something about that nervousness that drew Evan closer. Something about her panic that he thought he could possibly help with. He could reassure her. He could calm her down and find out what was wrong. Evan was a fixer; he longed to help people. It was one of the many things that made him good at his job.

"Are you okay? Can I help you?" Evan found himself rubbing his hands together in front of him and he tried to smile and dip his head down to catch her attention.

But the longer he looked at her, the more he realised she didn't look too well. When he got closer, he noticed she was trembling and her breathing was rather shallow, but she didn't look injured. He couldn't see any injury or blood on her and she wasn't cradling any part of her body or crying out in pain.

"Is- is the office clear now?" Her head ticked in the direction of the building and Evan took a moment to glance over his shoulder before he stepped closer to her.

"The fire's out, but the buildings not been cleared to re-enter yet."

(Y/n) unravelled one arm from her waist so she could tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear and she tensed her arm to try and stop the shaking from becoming visible. Her teeth sank down into her lower lip and she closed her eyes for a moment to try and gather her senses.

It was past dinner time. No one in the office had managed to get anything to eat before the fire alarm went off and they were suddenly being evacuated. (Y/n) had missed lunch, and her meds were up in her office. This didn't bode well.

She didn't realise she was swaying on her feet until she felt the fireman's hands suddenly clamping down on her upper arms. His grip was strong and his body was firm when he stood so close in front of her that she could smell the burnt wood smell that clung to his uniform and the smoke that made it seem like he had been grilled on a barbeque.

"C- can you help me?" Her voice sounded so quiet, so feeble and delicate and (Y/n) hated it.

But her voice was like music to Evan's ears. Something about her was drawing him in. He would help her. He would do whatever she asked him to try and help her. She looked like she needed protecting, like she needed looking after, and that was Evan's speciality.

He grinned down at her with a soft look in his eyes and murmured a quiet "Of course," while he squeezed her arm reassuringly.

She unhooked her arms from her waist and reached out for his arms and it felt strange to grab a fistful of his overall jacket rather than his actual arms.

(Y/n) couldn't help the way she winced when she wobbled and set off balance which caused the man in front of her to reel her into his chest. Her head flopped forward and back like she couldn't hold her neck straight and when she dared to try and open her blurring eyes, she was consumed when she stared up into those dark blue eyes.

"I think we should sit you down."

Evan let go of one of her arms so he could hold onto her waist to prevent her from falling to the floor. But when his hand brushed against something on her waist, his brows furrowed and he tilted his head down. He carefully flicked the hem of her shirt up just enough to see what was stuck to her waist.

Oh. She was a diabetic.

"Okay, miss, I need to check your sugar levels. Can I check your phone please?" The device attached to the right side of her waist was a Dexcom, Evan had seen a few of these before.

It monitored her blood sugar levels and he guessed that right now, she was starting to get low on sugar. That might be why she wanted to get back into the office building.

"I-it's inside," (Y/n) chuckled quietly but the motion set her off balance and she wobbled into the fireman's chest, not that he seemed to mind at all.

He tightened his arms around her and slowly eased her down with him until she was sat on the edge of the pavement and he was knelt behind her like a leaning post, preventing her from lying out on the ground. His hand began to run up and down her arm while he waved over towards Hen.

"Then we'll do this the old fashioned way with a needle, hm?" They carried a range of medical equipment in the ambulance and Evan knew they had the monitoring kit with them to check blood sugar levels. He could get Hen to check her levels and give her some glucose to boost her system.

Shivers coursed up and down Evan's spine when he felt the girl lean her head on his shoulder and when she smiled up at him, it was as if his heart was a firework that exploded in his chest.

"I got you, you're alright."

"Evan?"

(Y/n) managed a smile when she watched him head out the bathroom, about to turn and aim for the living room until her voice caught his ears. The smile on Evan's face made (Y/n)'s heart skip a beat and she almost felt bad for what she was about to ask. He probably knew what she was asking because she saw his eyes flit down to his watch.

Her gaze stayed on him as he sauntered into the kitchen and scanned his eyes around the counter. She had her insulin prepped and ready on the counter.

"Need a little help?"

(Y/n) wordlessly nodded and turned to lean her hips back against the counter when Evan headed over to her. She reached behind her to hold onto the counter, steadying herself while Evan washed his hands before he faced her.

The way he smiled down at her had her heart doing summersaults and her head tilted back to keep his gaze when he towered over her. The end of his nose nudged hers, silently tipping her head back a little more so he could capture her mouth in a kiss.

He knew what she was asking. (Y/n) didn't like injecting herself. She could do it, she had to learn since she had been having insulin all her life and she couldn't of lived alone if she couldn't administer her own meds. But it still didn't help that she hated having to do it. Whereas Evan didn't mind.

He seemed to love giving her the daily injections she needed. He had her Dexcom app on his phone so he could help monitor her levels, he was a great cook and could automatically calculate the carbohydrates in the food so (Y/n) didn't get too much or have an inbalance in sugar intake.

When Evan was around, (Y/n) barely had to worry at all.

She inclined her head to the left, allowing Evan access to trail his kisses down the side of her neck and she shivered when she felt his hand slipping beneath her shirt and tickling across her stomach. He smirked into her skin when she squirmed against his touch and she tilted her head down to watch as Evan rolled up her shirt and reached out for the needle.

He didn't seem to bat an eyelid as he bent at the knees to be level with her waist. (Y/n) did her best not to flinch or make a move when the needle pierced into her abdomen, but she knew Evan was being as gentle as possible. He kissed the tiny mark on her skin once he'd finished and set the needle down behind her so his hands could hold her hips and pull her close.

"All done." Evan stole another kiss while his fingers slid beneath the waistband of her jeans and he squeezed her sides and pulled her off the counter so she was pressed up against him.

He felt her murmur 'thank you' against his lips and he inhaled her words like they were the air he needed to breathe.

Evan liked that she relied on him- no, he loved it. Being useful was something he prided himself in and he wanted to look after (Y/n). Evan wanted to be the only one to look after (Y/n). He loved how she trusted him to do things for her.

She trusted him to give her the insulin injections she needed. She trusted him when he said her levels were low and they needed boosting or she should stay home if she was liable to have a hypo. Evan loved that (Y/n) didn't like going out without him. Her anxiety meant she didn't feel comfortable or safe going out alone, and with how heavily she relied on Evan, she didn't feel safe going out with anyone but him.

He accompanied her everywhere, and it let Evan have the control he needed to look after her. He knew where she was each day and what she was up to because she ran her schedules past him. She planned going out with friends around Evan's days off, he took her to appointments. If she went out alone she checked in with Evan and told him before she did it, she didn't make plans on a whim.

He always knew where she would be and what she would be doing and that meant if she wasn't well or something happened, Evan would know about it and know where she was.

Her depending on Evan made him feel useful, it made him feel loved and like her protector, and that was what he craved.

He smiled against her lips when he felt her hands slide up to cup either side of his neck and he loved the way she brushed her thumbs across his jaw and seemed to pull him closer as if they weren't already close enough.

With a growl, Evan leaned down and pulled his hands from within her jeans so he could scratch his nails down the back of her legs until he was cupping her thighs. He lifted her up with little effort and hoisted her up until her legs hooked around his waist and he could sit her down on the kitchen counter.

(Y/n) could barely breathe when Evan's hungry lips stole each ounce of air she tried to gasp for when their lips parted just enough to scrape a breath before Evan consumed her mouth again.

She felt the way his hands left her thighs once he had her sitting on the counter and he slid them right back into the hem of her jeans. He worked his fingers past her waistband until he was cupping her bum and he pulled her closer so she was sat on the edge of the counter.

Her arms rested on his shoulders and her hands continued to graze along his neck but they broke apart when (Y/n)'s phone buzzed on the counter.

She leaned her temple against Evan's and turned her head to the left, trying to locate her phone while she gasped to regain her breath.

Evan's hands stayed firmly tucked into her jeans and he ducked his head down to attach his lips to the side of her neck while she leaned across to grab her one, keeping one arm hooked around his neck. (Y/n) squirmed against him and smiled when she felt Evan's lips part enough so he could graze his teeth down her neck.

"Don't mark me up." She murmured quietly while she unlocked her phone, but she was met with a chuckle vibrating through her neck. She gasped, squeezing her thighs into his hips tightly when he bit down on her neck harsh enough that (Y/n) knew there would be a mark there later. She might even have a blood wheel, it felt like he had sank fangs down into her skin to prove a point.

"Why? Who's gonna notice but me?"

(Y/n) rolled her eyes but a smile flickered on her lips when Evan swatted his hand down on her hip in retaliation.

It wasn't as if (Y/n) would be going into an office to work tomorrow and people were going to see.

She worked from home.

(Y/n) had moved in with Evan a few months ago, despite them only just reaching their one year anniversary last month. When she moved in, he suggested it would be easier if she worked from home. After all, she was always crippled with anxiety and Evan couldn't go with her to work, whereas if she worked from home, on his days off, he would be here with her.

Added with the fact that she was diabetic and prone to feeling ill and having bad days, it was safer for her to be at home where Evan could keep an eye on her.

"Who's gonna be able to look after you better than me?"

Evan was the only one who looked after (Y/n); at least, that was the way he saw it and that was how he convinced (Y/n). He was the only one who looked after her properly, who loved her and cared for her and always had her best interests at heart.

If Evan was going to look after her, she needed to be around him. She worked from home so she didn't have to deal with people at the office like she used to. It stopped her getting anxious. Evan went out with her whenever she had to go to the shops or an appointment or just to see people because he calmed her down with her social anxiety, and he looked after her with her diabetes.

With his face still tucked into the crook of her neck, Evan continued his administrations, peppering kisses up and down her neck like he was adding paint to a canvas. He scraped his teeth along her neck, biting down and sucking bruises every now and then while he waited for her to check her phone.

He absentmindedly leaned into her, pressing his chest up against hers until he was almost laying (Y/n) down on her back on the counter with his efforts.

"Who is it?" His nose nudged against the underside of (Y/n)'s chin and he pressed an open-mouthed kiss against the centre of her neck, feeling the exact way (Y/n) took in a sharp breath against him.

The way he travelled his lips down the expanse of her throat, leaving wet, breathless kisses in his wake made (Y/n)'s mind cloud over. She had to blink three times just to get her vision back in focus.

Her right arm tightened around the back of his neck and she leaned her cheek on top of his head while she tried to read the text she'd been sent.

"Mum," The way she sighed made Evan stop and finally unlatch from her throat so he could pull back.

He looked down at her with furrowed brows and wide, blown pupils bubbling over with lust. His cheeks were flushed red and his lips were plump and a very dark shade of rouge.

"Yeah, what's she say?"

Evan was quite pleased that (Y/n)'s parents were somewhat distant. They were loving, sure, and they were a lot more involved and kinder than his own parents. But they didn't crowd (Y/n). If his daughter was as anxious as (Y/n) and had a condition like diabetes, Evan would be checking in with her every day to make sure she was alright. He would always want to be around her and look after her.

Her parents weren't like that. They checked in every now and then, they took an interest in (Y/n)'s life. But they weren't as involved as Evan thought a parent should be. It allowed Evan to be the main, prominent person in (Y/n)'s life, the person she went to first and who she relied on. It allowed him to look after her in his own way without someone commenting or trying hustle in.

Plus, it meant that they didn't make a fuss when (Y/n) moved in with Evan only a few months after they started dating. And when he proposed last month, her parents were happy. They didn't complain or worry that it was too soon because they weren't that involved in (Y/n)'s life.

With a groan, (Y/n) dropped her phone beside her on the counter and slumped her head forward onto Evan's shoulder. She laid her cheek on his shoulder and draped both arms back around his neck, pulling him closer so their chests were merged together again.

"What'd she say?" He asked again while he pecked the top of her head and started to glide his thumbs up and down her lower back while his fingers squeezed into her skin.

"Cathy's got a promotion at work, mum's throwing a celebration dinner next week." (Y/n) couldn't help the way she grumbled as she spoke.

Cathy was her older sister. The one her parents paid the most attention to. It was another reason why she and Evan bonded so well; where Evan got along amazing with Maddie, (Y/n) was distant from her big sister. But both she and Evan were the younger siblings, they were the ones who were often left out and forgotten and not as involved with their parents.

When (Y/n) told her parents she and Evan got engaged they were happy, they congratulated them, but they didn't throw a celebration dinner. All Cathy had done was gained a promotion at a job that she only got because her boyfriend was one of the executives.

"You wanna go?"

"I don't know… will you come?"

Evan rolled his lips together to supress a smile and he wriggled one hand out of her jeans so he could reach across for her phone. He looked over the message and checked the date. It was his day off.

"Sure, I'll go with you, baby." Evan could tell by her expression that she wouldn't last long at that dinner if he didn't go with her.

She barely walked out the house unless Evan went with her. She wouldn't go to her parent's house and watch them celebrate her sister if Evan wasn't there to calm her down and look out for her. He would keep her calm, he would be there if she didn't feel well or if she felt too uncomfortable to stay or if she ended up arguing with Cathy.

(Y/n) barely managed to mumble a quiet 'thank you' before Evan's lips were bruisingly attached to hers and he shuffled her off the counter so she was sat on his hips instead.

He was more than happy to take her to a family meal; after all, Evan was only one who looked out for her properly.

He had to keep an eye on her.

***

A look of annoyance plastered across Evan's face for what felt like the fifth time since they arrived. His lips pursed, his chin tilted up almost in a look of defiance and his lips rolled together until they were barely visible.

In the year that Evan and (Y/n) had been together, he hadn't had the pleasure of meeting Cathy before.

From what he had seen tonight, he didn't like her.

He tried to hide the displeasure from his face when he felt Cathy's hand on his arm as she walked past him. The way she squeezed his bicep and looked up at him with that sickly sweet smile made Evan's stomach churn.

She was trying her best, he would admit that. She was trying her luck with getting as close to Evan as possible without making it seem too obvious. She had grabbed his arm enough times in the last hour as she passed him or weaved around him. She was grinning at him, tilting her head at that angle and leaned closer whenever he talked.

He had seen it all before, and none of it impressed him. The only girl who captured Evan's attention was the younger sister on his left who had been burrowing into his side since they got here like she wanted to disappear.

(Y/n) was the only girl on his mind and Evan would make that crystal clear, as many times as he had to until Cathy got the message. He wasn't interested. She wasn't his type. (Y/n) was his girl; she was the one he was engaged to and nothing was going to change that or change Evan's mind.

He was glad (Y/n) hadn't noticed. If she knew what her sister was up to then she would become insecure and want to leave. Evan didn't want her getting upset, although he wasn't opposed to spending the rest of the night showing her every way in which he loved her.

When Cathy leaned into him, Evan leaned to the side and took a step back, acting as if he were moving out of the doorway when really, he was moving from her touch.

(Y/n) moved to sit down on the sofa next to her mum and when she kept her hands wrapped around Evan's arm, he took the hint. He followed with her and perched down on the arm rest so (Y/n) could lean into his side and curve herself around his thigh like she was trying to mould them both together.

He carefully slid his arm from her grasp so he could loop his arm around her shoulders. His fingers began to feather up and down her arm as Cathy came back into the room with a tray of drinks.

She dished out the drinks, handing Evan and her dad a bottle of beer each before she held out glasses to (Y/n) and their mum and took one for herself.

"Oh, I haven't eaten yet, I-"

"Relax, it's non-alcoholic." The grin on Cathy's face made (Y/n) swallow down any protest she was going to try and give.

She knew Cathy had been making a few cocktails in the kitchen when they arrived and (Y/n) had asked earlier for a non-alcoholic one. But she wasn't sure if Cathy would of remembered or bothered to make one without the vodka and the peach schnapps.

It didn't seem to matter that they had both lived under the same roof for the first fifteen years of (Y/n)'s life, her big sister never seemed to pay much attention when it came to (Y/n)'s diabetes. She was forever reminding Cathy whenever they went out to eat with their parents that (Y/n) wasn't on a diet, she just had to watch what carbohydrates and saturates she ate because of how they would boost or lower her sugar levels.

It was the same with drinking. (Y/n) wasn't much of a drinker, it was an acquired taste she didn't have, but she liked a drink on the odd occasion. Whenever she had alcohol, (Y/n) had to measure what she drank and make sure she ate too and adjusted her insulin levels. Alcohol messed with her sugar levels very badly. It seemed easier not to bother drinking than to take all the precautions.

Cathy grinned when (Y/n) accepted the glass and they both watched their mum grin and gasp a little when she realised how much vodka Cathy had added to her drink.

(Y/n) took a few sips and scrunched her nose up. Cathy had added a lot of cranberry juice which made it rather bitter, but it was okay. (Y/n) liked the fruity mixture.

She leaned into Evan's thigh and after finishing another glass when Cathy held out another round, their mum headed to the kitchen saying dinner would just about be ready.

"You good?" Evan murmured into the top of her hair while (Y/n) set her empty glass down on the coffee table.

She nodded and leaned over to look at his watch. This was around the usual time they would have something to eat, (Y/n) tried to keep to regular eating patterns to stop her levels from becoming unbalanced. She wouldn't be much good in Evan's line of work since he told her they were often skipping meals or delaying meals for call outs.

They weren't exactly late for eating dinner today, but (Y/n) felt oddly hungry and when she started to flex her fingers on her lap, she noticed she was subtly shaking. She clenched both hands together and pressed them down into her thighs so Evan wouldn't notice. She didn't want him to worry. She was probably just extra hungry due to her nerves about coming here tonight.

"Food's ready."

(Y/n) felt herself go lightheaded for a moment when she got to her feet, but it was comforting to feel Evan's arm swoop in and deadlock around her waist. She let her head fall into the centre of his chest and she bound both her arms around her chest as they walked through into the dining room.

Her mum's cooking was no match for what Evan would cook, but it was still enticing. (Y/n) had gotten Evan quite a few cook books recently because on his days off he was starting to do lots of cooking and testing out the recipes Bobby showed him at work.

Evan tried not to sigh when they sat around the table; of course Cathy would sit close to him.

He had (Y/n) on his left, both her parents sat opposite them and then Cathy had taken the seat at the right end of the table. Close enough that she could lean over and be in Evan's personal space. If she moved her elbow an inch too far she would knock into his arm. And she was near enough that simply crossing her leg over the other would jolt her foot into Evan's thigh.

He looked to his left when (Y/n) reached out for the glass in front of her; Cathy had taken the liberty of bringing all their drinks through to the dining room and refilled them.

(Y/n) was thirsty tonight; drinking too much fruit juice would give her too much sugar, but being thirsty was also a sign that her levels might not be right. Maybe they were starting to drop and she needed to eat to level out again.

He felt the way (Y/n) leaned into him as they began to eat. He loved how she nuzzled her cheek into his arm and pressed up into his side like she was trying to tuck herself under his arm.

Like she was seeking his protection.

Evan loved it; it drove him mad. He slid his left hand beneath the table and started to trace his fingers across (Y/n)'s inner thigh and he felt the way it made her take a sharp breath. When he trailed his hand up higher and pinched the top of her thigh, he felt the way she straightened in her chair and tried her best not to react.

He kept his hand there for a while and tilted his head to the right when Cathy began to speak.

"So Buck, tell us, how does it feel to be the hero?"

Cathy perched her chin on the back of her left hand and leaned closer in Evan's direction while she prodded her fork at her food. The way she grinned at him didn't impress him and he kept his hand on (Y/n)'s thigh while he tried to muster a passive smile.

"I'm not a hero, I just do my job." He didn't see himself as a hero, he hadn't done anything special on the job to warrant that name.

"Oh please, I've read the news. A tsunami and helping that biker trapped in the car windshield at Halloween, both when you were off shift. Either you're always on duty or you are a hero." Cathy waved her fork in his direction before she continued to eat.

He felt the way (Y/n) twisted her head to perch her chin on his shoulder and the feeling of her breath tickling his neck made him shiver.

"You can take a little credit, you know." (Y/n) murmured softly before she tried to keep eating, even though she felt Evan's hand retract from her thigh so he could pick up his knife again.

She knew Evan didn't value himself highly on the job when he should, and she knew he didn't always see the things he did as something special. But he was great at what he did and to the people he helped, Evan was visioned as a hero. He could take credit for that, it wouldn't make him big-headed or give him an ego.

He nodded and made a show of leaning over to peck (Y/n)'s temple before he finished eating.

He knew what Cathy was doing, and he wouldn't let her get a rise out of him or think that he was even the tiniest bit interested.

He wasn't.

The girl he loved was sat to his left. (Y/n) was the one who had his heart. She was the one Evan looked after, the one who needed him and relied on him and who Evan was fiercely protective over. Evan loved how much (Y/n) needed him and how she relied on him; he loved that she didn't go out unless he went with her, how she only felt safe when Evan went somewhere with her. He loved how she ran everything past him before she went somewhere or even thought about doing something.

He loved that she seemed to revolve herself around him because it meant Evan could make her the centre of his world. He didn't have to worry about not knowing where she was or who she was with or if she was okay because she told him these things. Almost as if it was conditioned into her to tell Evan all of these things.

Evan had the control he needed and he didn't have to ask for it.

The conversation shift again and Evan was a little annoyed that whatever they talked about seemed to constantly revolve back around to Cathy. It was like she was the sun and things were orbiting around her, their conversations, their attention, the mood in general, everything was guided from and back to her.

When the attention shifted to (Y/n), Evan could feel himself riling up when the spotlight once again shone on Cathy. She couldn't let (Y/n) have one moment in the light.

(Y/n) closed her eyes for a moment and moved her hand to cradle her temple. Eating hadn't made her feel much better. She knew she had to give it time for her body to straighten itself out and get her levels back to normal, but it usually happened faster than this. She didn't like feeling like this, especially not when she was with her family or in public.

"So, have you set a date yet?"

(Y/n) managed to open her eyes and she leaned to the right to lay her head on Evan's arm when she felt his hand move back down beneath the table to cup her thigh.

"We were thinking, p-probably April." She smiled and kept her head on Evan's arm, but it was hard to concentrate on her parents sitting opposite when her head felt like it was going to explode. Although she did see her mum nod approvingly and her dad grinned.

"That soon? Is there something you need to tell us?" The way Cathy rose a brow and inclined her head made (Y/n) shudder and shake her head.

It wasn't as if they were planning the wedding next month. It was next year, granted it would only be roughly five or six months away, but even that felt like too long to be waiting. They wanted to get married; (Y/n) had a hard enough time as it was stopping Evan from wanting to elope and get married tomorrow. He was always giving her good reasons. The only reason she kept saying no was because she wanted their friends to be there with them.

They weren't planning an elaborate wedding, it would be a small ceremony with the team, their parents and one or two other close family members. That would be it. (Y/n) knew as long as Maddie and Jee were there, Evan didn't care about anyone else in his family. He wanted them and the team, that was it and (Y/n) felt the same. She wanted her parents there, but she would be just as happy if for some reason they couldn't make it. Evan's family was her family now.

"No, nothing like that." (Y/n) tried to grin and make light of her sister's joke, she knew it was only meant in jest. And if (Y/n) were pregnant like Cathy implied, their wedding would be much sooner than six months away.

She nuzzled her cheek into Evan's arm when she heard him mutter "Not yet, anyway," around the rim of his glass.

Evan felt her smiling against his arm as she pushed into him a little more, but when he tilted his head to look down at her, he couldn't help but frown. His lips attached to the top of her head and his hand tightened around her thigh.

"Are you okay?"

"Headache."

Somehow, Evan wasn't so sure a headache was the only problem. He could feel (Y/n) trembling against him like she was sat out in the freezing cold rather than in a warm, heated dining room.

With pursed lips, Evan moved his free hand and pressed the back of his hand against her temple. She was flushed and he could feel a layer of sweat coating her skin. None of these were good implicators. Especially not when (Y/n) looped both her hands around his bicep and leaned into him as she trembled and juttered back and forth on her seat.

Evan didn't care what topic of conversation Cathy tried to steer the atmosphere towards. He leaned his cheek on top of (Y/n)'s head and fished his phone out of his pocket so he could scroll onto her Dexcom app. He had the app on his phone too, for safety reasons. It meant if Evan was at work, he could keep an eye on (Y/n) and make sure she was okay and her levels weren't drastically rising or falling while he was out and she was home alone.

"Baby you're having a hypo." Evan rolled his lips together as he looked down at (Y/n).

He hated the way her eyes blew wide but the way she stared up at him like a lost puppy needing guidance made his stomach tighten.

Her hands tightened around his arm and she tilted her head back so she could look up at him, but it seemed to set her off balance and her head lolled back a little too far. Evan reached his right hand around and cupped the back of her neck to stop her head from tilting too far back and hurting her neck.

" But I hav- I've had my insulin." The way she stared up at him and the panic in her voice made Evan go soft and turned his insides to mush.

They both knew she'd had her insulin. Evan had done the injection himself, as he always did, and he gave her the right amount. Usually having too much insulin would cause (Y/n) to have a hypo and Evan was always careful, he knew what he was doing.

It wouldn't play to his advantage now for (Y/n) to go into a hypo, it would only serve to panic her in front of her family and make her feel worse. It wasn't like a few months ago when (Y/n) had suffered with hypos during the night. That stopped her from leaving the house without Evan and made her even more anxious than before and therefore, she clung to Evan. That had played to his advantage.

Evan glanced over at (Y/n)'s plate, as if somehow the contents would change and show that she'd had too much carbohydrates. But the food was the same as he'd eaten. Her mum always knew how to portion food correctly to go with (Y/n)'s diet.

"I know, but you need some sugar now." Evan stroked his thumb up and down the back of her neck while he looked down at his phone to see how badly this hypo was becoming. As long as he got some sugar into (Y/n)'s system quick, her levels should start to creep back up and they could avoid a hospital visit.

"Oh, why don't you sit in the kitchen, the sweets and stuff are in there." The way Cathy waved her hand was rather dismissive, as if this was nothing at all.

She motioned her hand towards the kitchen behind her and reached out for her drink like this wasn't a big deal. Sure, Cathy had seen (Y/n) have hypos and hyperglacemia before, she had seen (Y/n) collapse and need an ambulance one or two times when she used to live at home. But that didn't mean that this situation was okay and it rubbed Evan up the wrong way how dismissive she was being.

"Evan," Panic lit up (Y/n)'s voice as she held her breath and looked up at him with worry in her eyes.

She didn't want to be alone. Evan always looked after her, especially when she was going through a hypo like this. Being on her own in this situation always made her nervous, she had been through these situations enough to know how bad they made her feel. She felt sick, she shook, her limbs felt heavy and her head ached. Sometimes she fainted.

(Y/n) wanted Evan to stay with her, she didn't want to go and sit in the kitchen on her own and suffer through this.

"It's okay sweetheart, I'm coming with you."

Evan pushed up from his seat and held his hands out towards her to help her up. But once she was on her feet, he watched how (Y/n) coiled in on herself and how her whole body was reduced to shaking. Her breaths started to run away without her and the way she nibbled on her lower lip showed she was really starting to feel unwell.

He grabbed his phone and hooked both their drinks in his right hand while his left arm secured around (Y/n)'s waist and pulled her into his side. His lips merged with the top of her head when she burrowed under his arm like she was taking refuge under his wing.

When they got to the kitchen, (Y/n) flopped down into one of the chairs very ungracefully and she flopped both her arms forward onto the kitchen table so her temple could press down into her arms and her eyes fell closed.

Evan set the drinks down on the table and turned to look in the cupboard above the kettle. He knew (Y/n)'s parents had a treats cupboard with biscuits and snacks and sweets. He looked through the basket and found a pack of fizzy, sour sweets before he moved to the fridge and found a can of pop.

He wasn't sure why the fruit juice (Y/n) had been drinking hadn't managed to keep her levels up though. It was supposed to be good for hypos. What kind of fruit juice did Cathy buy?

"No, no baby, sit up for me." Evan laid everything on the table and sat down in the chair beside her.

He was gentle when he twisted her chair so she was facing him and their knees were brushing together. His hands carefully reached out for her and he slowly reeled her up so she was no longer laid across the table. She was rather floppy and unbalanced and it made Evan's lips curl in panic.

"Come on, drink some of this for me."

(Y/n) tried to smother her groan when Evan held out a can of Fanta for her and she tried to drink a few sips but she was starting to feel sick.

Her nerves tingled and her blood fizzled and crackled in her veins when Evan peppered a few kisses against her temple. And when his thumb pushed between her lips and pulled down her lower lip, (Y/n) felt like her brain was short-circuiting.

Each breath she took fanned against Evan's fingers as he gently pulled on her lip and opened her mouth so he could push a sweet past her lips.

The sugar tingled the inside of (Y/n)'s lips and it made her mouth feel dry and thirsty, but she figured that had something to do with the hypo. They usually made her feel thirsty and dehydrated as well as groggy and shaky.

She leaned her cheek against Evan's palm and closed her eyes for a few moments while he pecked her temple and fed her another sweet.

After a few more sips of Fanta and another two sweets, (Y/n) felt like she wasn't being shaken back and forth anymore. She could feel her limbs coming back under her control and her head was calming down rather than feeling like someone was bashing her skull with a hammer.

"That's better," Evan murmured quietly before he inched forward and stole her lips in a kiss. His tongue darted across her lower lip, stealing the tiny flecks of sugar from her mouth and pushing past her lips like she was intoxicating him and he couldn't get enough.

(Y/n) reached her hands out to cup either side of Evan's neck, mostly to keep herself from falling off her chair and slumping across his lap. But she felt the way he shivered when she feathered her fingers up and down his neck.

"How are we doing in here?"

(Y/n) shifted her hands down to hold Evan's shoulders and she angled her head to the left when her mum walked into the kitchen.

She set the plates down in the sink before turning to face the pair of them with a tender, slightly worried look on her face. It was a change for (Y/n) to have someone like Evan taking care of her rather than have her mum usher her into the living room to try and sit her down and help her through it. When she wasn't well seemed to be the only time (Y/n) got her parent's full attention, which was a reason why her and Evan had bonded so well.

"Panic over." Evan smiled before he pecked the top of (Y/n)'s head and started to glide his hand up and down her arm.

"Good, why don't you both come through to the lounge now, come and have a rest."

(Y/n) could feel her knees tensing when she stood up and her legs felt hollow yet heavy at the same time. She didn't feel like moving, but it wasn't as if they were out and about on the streets or walking for miles. She cradled her can of Fanta close to her chest, pinning her elbows into her waist like she was trying to coil in on herself.

She went to follow after her mum but she glanced back over her shoulder to check Evan was behind her. "I'm coming," He nodded while he reached out for his drink and grabbed the pack of sweets from the table. They might need some more sugar, just to be safe and make sure (Y/n)'s levels stayed up.

He tucked his phone back into his pocket after reassuring himself that (Y/n) was actually coming out of her hypo. But he still wasn't sure why the juice hadn't worked.

Curiosity got the better of Evan and he wasn't sure why, but he reached out for (Y/n)'s glass that was almost empty. He took a small sip. Fruit was full of sugar and fruit juice was high in sugar and great for diabetics.

Evan grimaced and his nose crinkled when he took a gulp. That wasn't juice, that was a cocktail.

It was faint, but Evan could taste vodka and the slightest hint of peach schnapps. Evan had been on enough nights out and had enough bad times in his life to resort to drinking to make himself feel better. He knew what a cocktail tasted like. He also knew that Cathy wasn't stupid, she knew (Y/n) couldn't have alcohol unless she adjusted her insulin and especially not on an empty stomach.

(Y/n) had told her she didn't want alcohol when they came in tonight and Cathy had blatantly ignored and lied to her.

She could have sent (Y/n) into a worse hypoglycaemic state. She could have put her in the hospital, she had risked (Y/n)'s health tonight like she thought this was some kind of game.

Well it wasn't. This wasn't a game and Evan wasn't going to stand for what Cathy had done to his girl.

Evan tossed the glass into the sink with a bit more abandon than he intended and he was sure he heard the glass crack. His fingers began to drum around the neck of his beer bottle and he dumped the sweets back on the table as his arms started to tremble with rage.

"Need another drink?" The sultry tone to Cathy's voice had shivers coursing up and down Evan's spine.

He snapped his head to look behind him over his right shoulder and he took a deep breath as his lips rolled into a thin line until they were almost invisible. The way she walked towards him with her hips swaying infuriated him and when her hand reached out and squeezed his bicep, Evan felt like his vision had been tinted red.

He hummed quietly, twisting his body to follow her movements as she walked past him to aim for the fridge, and Evan found himself stalking after her. He moved slow, feet barely lifting from the floor as not to make a sound like a predator stalking its prey.

His hands clenched into fists at his sides after he set his bottle down on the counter and his shoulders hunched up to be level with his jaw. His biceps seemed like they were bulging out of his shirt and Evan glowered when he realised how he towered over Cathy the same as he did (Y/n).

But this was was different. This wasn't Evan towering over (Y/n), trying to pin her to his chest and consume her whole. This wasn't him wrapping around her like a security blanket or using his height and build to his advantage to subdue (Y/n) and turn her to putty in his hands.

This was Evan towering over the person he was getting ready to destroy. The person who had threatened the girl Evan loved, the girl who was Evan's whole world and who he made it his mission to look after and make her his.

Cathy had tried to hurt her, and she had to pay for that.

When Cathy reached the fridge, she sensed just how close Evan was standing behind her and instead of opening the fridge, she turned around. Her grin broadened until her smile was reaching her seductive eyes and her head angled to the right while she leaned her back against the fridge.

"Oh, so-"

Whatever she had been prepared to say faded into a gasp as her painted rouge lips splintered into a gasp and her teeth flashed when Evan's hand curled around her throat.

Tears welled up in her eyes and both her hands scratched into Evan's wrist, but he didn't feel her touch. He could barely feel his hands from the amount of adrenaline coursing through his veins so her nails trying to scratch at his skin wasn't going to make a dent on him.

He leaned down until Cathy was well and truly a caged animal and he moved his free hand to press his finger against her sickly red lips that were so bright the colour was offending. She seemed to get the silent message he was conveying and she held her breath, even though she could barely breathe as it was. Her head started to nod and her chin pressed down into his hand to try reassure him that she wasn't about to scream or make a single sound to alert her family what he was doing.

"Now you're not going to cause another scene, you're going to listen." His voice was quiet but the authoritiative tone was crystal clear.

He waited patiently for Cathy's terrified, wide eyes to blink and focus on him and for her to stop breathing in so much it felt like she was a balloon about to burst. When she finally started to exhale and take shallow little breaths, Evan's lips formed a crooked grin that made her shudder back against the fridge.

She let a tiny hum gurgle at the back of her throat and she rapidly blinked to try and convey that she was listening. She was waiting for him to tell her what on Earth he was doing and why.

"I don't think I need to ask why I tasted vodka in (Y/n)'s glass, do I?" Cathy shook her head and a tiny croak left her lips. She had been caught out and they both knew it. "That's what I thought. And do I take it you caused that hypo on purpose, somehow to gain my attention?"

Evan wasn't quite sure why Cathy thought that giving (Y/n) a hypo would get her to have his attention rather than (Y/n). This little stunt had made Evan worried about (Y/n), it made him want to take her home to keep her safe, especially now he knew that this had happened on purpose and was by no means a coincidence.

Doing that to (Y/n) was only going to raise Evan's concerns about her and drive him wild. It wasn't going to make him suddenly fawn over Cathy or want to be closer to her. He would of given her any attention even if he hadn't of found out what she'd done.

When she nodded again, Evan watched as tears began to well up in her eyes and one or two tears trickled down her face. She looked feeble and timid which wasn't her usual personality and the way her lower lip was wobbling made Evan want to laugh crudely at her.

It was clear she was feeling silly about what she'd done. Evan hoped she realised how stupid she had been rather than feeling bad that she had been caught out.

"So you've just threatened my girl. And I don't care if you're family, I don't let people get away with that."

His fingers punctured into her throat and he gave a rather forceful squeeze until Cathy's eyes were bulging in their sockets and her jaw started to wriggle. Her hands slapped his wrist and she pushed back into the fridge, desperately trying to make him relent. Her chin dropped down onto his hand as fresh tears began to trickle down her face as she couldn't catch a single breath.

He revelled in the utter panic in Cathy's eyes and the desperation shrouding her face as her feet started to skid against the tiled floor and her mouth wriggled, but no sound or air left her paling lips.

The terror on her face made Evan's grin widen and his eyes narrowed. He could of stood there and choked the life out of her. He could of carried on until she passed out and crumpled to the floor like a used tissue. But when she really started to struggle, Evan suddenly relaxed his hand until the base of his fingertips were just barely pressing down on her throat.

He felt the way her pulse throbbed against his fingers and the veins started to protrude against her throat as she gasped and choked, gagging on the air she needed to inhale.

"Please, I won't- I swear, I-" Cathy gasped for air, trying to find the right words but she couldn't talk. Her throat burned like she had swallowed acid and her skin was pulsing and throbbing.

She wouldn't tell. If he didn't do that again and stayed away from her, she wouldn't tell her parents or (Y/n) what he'd just done. She would stay away from both of them if Evan left her alone, she would promise him that. He was unhinged and Cathy wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

"Pleading with me isn't going to work." His grin seemed to widen when Cathy whimpered and shrunk back against the fridge.

"I'm sorry." The word bubbled past her lips as a few more tears of anguish and fear trickled down her face.

She didn't know Evan; if she knew him better and knew he had these kind of tendencies, she wouldn't of given (Y/n) those cocktails. She wouldn't of made those passes at Evan and ignored her little sister. She would of stayed as far away from the couple as possible if she knew he was like this.

Surprise pooled in her blown pupils when Evan took a step back and allowed an air of space to grow between them.

She was expecting him to grab her again, to hit her or break her wrist or maybe even clutch her hair and drag her around like a ragdoll. She was expecting Evan to do something manic, maybe even drag her out the back door and hurt her some more. But Cathy wasn't expecting Evan to let her go and step back.

Was he going to stop? Was this just a warning and he would let her off as long as she didn't do anything else?

Her hands moved to cup her neck and she began tracing her fingers along her throat, rubbing up and down the tender spots where she would have fingerprints and bruises come the morning. She tried to smother her cough into her arm, she didn't want to attract her family's attention. Not when Evan had already warned her to stay quiet.

"Watch your back. I haven't decided yet how you're going to pay for this mistake."

The warning tone in Evan's voice made Cathy whimper and she cowered down, smothering a shriek when Evan's hand latched into her hair. Her eyes fell closed and she coiled her arms to her chest, holding her hands out like she was trying to show she wasn't dangerous or begging for mercy.

She stumbled on her feet as Evan gave her a shove towards the other end of the kitchen where they had a downstairs bathroom right at the back of the house. And she was sure she heard him utter "Disappear." through a grunt before he aimed in the opposite direction towards the living room.

He shook his arms at his sides, ridding the excess adrenaline from his system as he walked into the living room and eased down onto the sofa beside (Y/n). His lips formed into a smile when (Y/n) immediately tucked herself beneath his arm that looped around her shoulders and his lips attached to the top of her head.

"Where's Cathy got to?"

"Bathroom, she didn't look too well." Evan scuffed his free hand across his jaw before he made a slight hint, pointing towards the drinks on the coffee table. Everyone had seen Cathy drink quite a lot tonight and now that her hair had fallen out of its fancy get-up and she had been crying, it would add to the implication that she was drunk.

He was quite surprised (Y/n)'s parents believed the implication, for her dad shook his head with a sigh and her mum made a little dissatisfied noise and shook her hands like she was dismissing the subject. Clearly Cathy wasn't as high and mighty as she liked to make out.

(Y/n) felt like smiling at the notion that Cathy was drunk, it was just like her sister to be boastful and get ahead of herself like this.

Both her parents mused themselves with a quiet conversation about going to check on Cathy as the pair of them flitted about the living room. (Y/n) watched them for a moment before she turned to look at Evan when he leaned over her.

She could feel her nerves igniting and restarting the trembling she'd had earlier when Evan ducked his head down and attached his lips to the junction of her neck just below her jaw. Her hand reached over to grip his arm, silently trying to see what he was up to because although her parents weren't watching them, they were still in the same room.

"Wanna go home, baby?" The way Evan glided his hand over (Y/n)'s thigh made her jump and he grinned against her neck at the reaction.

His teeth grazed over her skin, just starting to create a sting and (Y/n) knew she would have another bruise to add to her collection soon. But she felt his hand crawl across her thigh until his fingers were tracing the inside of her leg, inching higher and higher towards a dangerous area.

"Evan…" She muttered against his temple and pressed a few kisses there to try and ward him to stop. But she was inclined to agree and go home soon. They had been here for long enough and the hypo had made her feel tired and shaky. (Y/n) would rather be at home where she felt safe and comfortable, where it would be just the two of them and it was clear Evan felt the same.

"I wanna take care of you, baby." His words were peppered along her neck like a quiet promise spoken into her skin and (Y/n) found herself nodding into his hair.

It was time to leave.

#imagine #911 imagine #evan buckley #evan buckley x reader #evan buckley imagine #buck imagine #buck x reader #dark! buck #dark! evan buckley

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insufferableprotagonistpoll · 10 months ago

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Propaganda why Tony Stark is insufferable:

>Makes weapons

>Billionaire

>Made multiple AI Surveillance Robots

>Gaslight a child into fighting a super soldier in a foreign country for him

>His fans are annoying

Portrayed as a hero because? He chose to no longer mass produce war weapons and bombs after suffering the consequences. Huge hypocrite. Doesn't care about anyone but himself. Will backstab people if they believe in human rights when it's inconvenient to him. Seen as a hero while he's the personification of privileged people saying they're not privileged

There’s the usual “he’s a war criminal who only felt bad about it when he realized his weapons were killing white Americans as well as Arab people” reason, and also he’s just super annoying. You had to be there for the original Avengers shitty dialogue a la “we have a Hulk” that had Tumblr in a vicious chokehold. Also he was supposed to FINALLY go away after destroying all his suits in Iron Man 3 but he just… didn’t! Which is bullshit.

Tony is so annoying. When they first meet he straight up bullies Peter into fighting for his personal bullshit, insults and objectifies Aunt May in front of him, spits into his trashcan and is in general being pushy af. He blackmails Peter when he doesn’t wanna come to Germany with him AND HE DOESNT EVEN EXPLAIN WHY HE WANTS HIM TO COME. Uncomfortable vibes lol.

Tony being the one to tell peter “if Captain America wanted to hurt you he would’ve” when Peter was trying to state his case, yet HE’S also the one who put Peter in harms way when he didn’t even want to go with him???

Telling Peter that he should stick to being a “friendly neighborhood Spider-Man” (stealing his thing once again) when that’s what Peter _was_ doing before Tony took him out of his zone and filled his head with grander things to be apart of….bitch? Die. Ohh waaaait (jkjk) but yeah

Super long, sorry lol

Thinking about how in Homecoming when Peter accidentally caused that boat to get split in half because the Vulture’s gun exploded and Tony was acting like as if Peter was completely in the wrong for going there just because he did it without his permission. He was acting like as if Peter was out of line and “disobeyed him”, trying to act like his father. And then I remember how in CACW he’s the one who scouted Peter in the first place just because he saw he might be useful against a personal squabble between him and Captain America despite knowing that he was a kid and he’s just now acknowledging how dangerous it is because Peter “acted on his own”

Completely hijacking Peter’s superhero story and trying to control his every move (Training wheels protocol and baby monitor thing he put in the suit), acting like Peter should’ve known that Tony would send someone in despite the fact that he’d been ignoring him for 2 months since Civil War and not keeping him updated on anything!!

How the hell is peter supposed to know Tony is going to listen to him when he treats him like a kid instead of a superhero when it’s convenient for him? And when Tony loses his temper after Peter says he’s 15 not 14 like “the adult is talking” bitch he could literally flatten you without your suit!!!

I guess in a way he is acting like a father but like the absentee kind. He’s more like a sperm donor father trying to act like he has any rights over Peter’s life smh.

It’s not that reprimanding Peter for the situation is bad, but the way he makes it seem as if Peter is irredeemable as if Tony wasn't a literal weapons dealer lmfao. He could’ve said what was the truth about it without completely invalidating him saying shit like “no thanks to you” after Peter asked if everyone is okay when it’s literally thanks to Peter finding a lead on those guys in the first place that they were even noticed and it’s not like the FBI being there could’ve in no way caused a similar situation.

And then near the end of the movie when he’s getting crushed by the building rubble screaming and crying for someone to help him where the fuck is Tony?? That scene just proved that he never needed Tony’s suit in the first place to be Spider-Man since he had to use 100% his own strength to lift it off of him. I know he would’ve found the motivation even if Tony hadn’t been involved in the first place to give him the suit, take it away from him and have the words “if you’re nothing without the suit you shouldn’t have it“ echo in his head. Why did Tony even take the suit away? Like as if he expects Peter to stop being spoderman without it??? Holy fuck. This is why you don’t make it out of endgame /j /srs.

When Tony took this suit away from Peter he was like “God I sound like my dad“ shouldn’t that be a red flag to him? Wasn’t he literally just saying that he wished his dad was better than he was?? Lmfao

Propaganda why Victor Frankenstein is insufferable:

Victor Frankenstein is so pathetic not even tumblr could love him. The best parts of Frankenstein are the ones where your blessedly saved from being in his whiny, self deprecating, self centered pov. He’s so conceited that when his creation tells him directly “In revenge for killing the wife you were making for me I’m going to kill YOUR wife to see how YOU like it!”, Victor Frankenstein thinks that the creation is going to kill him and *only* him. (A decision And on top of it, he’s a shitty dad. Truly the worst.

this fucker has zero self awareness, which could maybe be fun to read about! except that 3/4 of the book consists of him constantly woe-is-me-ing about his own mistakes and how he shouldn't be responsible for any of his own actions.

He's not irredeemable, but his refusal to take accountability til it's too late is irritating

#tony stark #mcu #victor frankenstein #frankenstein or the modern prometheus #insufferable protagonist poll #insufferable protagonist tournament #tournament poll

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cherriegyuu · 10 months ago

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lens of ice | yjh | one

pairing: jeonghan x f!reader genre: figure skater jeonghan, light angst, a little fluff, smut in the next part word count: 12k summary: jeonghan has only one chance left to make it to the olympics. as he embarks on this decisive journey, you, a documentarist, are set to follow him as he seeks the ultimate glory. warnings: jeonghan is kind of reckless with his body a/n: i've been writing this one for so long now and though it's not finished yet, i decided to post half of it, as a way to motivate myself to finish it. i really wanna thank @ressonancee first for giving me idea and second for helping me through all of this and putting up my crazy ass mind 💓

part one | part two (final)

The light buzzing of the fluorescent lights made him uncomfortable, it was like a premonition of what was to come. Something bad, he was sure.

Jeonghan was many things in his life, stubborn perhaps being the most obvious one, but dumb wasn't one then. He knew that his ankle was fucked up, that he was probably the cause of it. Too many hours of training, never giving himself enough time to heal before he got the ice again. He didn't know exactly how bad it was, that was for the doctor in front of him to say, but Jeonghan knew that nothing good would come out of the man's mouth.

"It's worse than I thought," the man said with a sigh, taking off his glasses "It's not just your ankle anymore, it's also your knee. And, I could be wrong, but considering the way you're walking, I'd say that you're right ankle also started to bother you"

Jeonghan hung his head. He was an athlete and he knew that he was being reckless, beyond actually. He should have gone to his coach the second he felt a sharp pain in his ankle. But he just went home, took an ice bath, and kept the whole thing to himself. Even on the following days, when the pain didn't go away at all, he still chose to keep his mouth shut and go to practice every day. And his coach, unaware of his condition, kept pushing him during practice.

Not that he needed anyone to be harsh on him, Jeonghan did all of that on his own. But having someone else do that for him as well brought out a different desire for perfection. One that came from a dark place to show someone else that he was good, to prove people wrong.

"Can I still compete?" was all he asked, it was the only thing that mattered to him "Can I make it to the Olympics? It's the last one for me, after this I retire"

The look on the doctor's face wasn't reassuring, Jeonghan knew that his next words wouldn't be the ones he wanted. He wasn't about to hear what he needed.

"If, and only if, you have surgery, take physical therapy seriously, and rest as we instruct you, there might be a possibility. Small, but it exists"

"When can I have the surgery?"

You stared at your computer screen, a hand on your forehead as you read the email your boss sent you. You sat at your desk, not really knowing what to do.

"Seungkwan!" you called without looking up "Did you get this email too?"

Just to make sure that you weren't crazy, you read it once again. The third time in less than five minutes. No matter how many times you read it, it didn't change.

"Yeah. I'm excited but scared…"

That was enough to get your attention.

"Why?"

Closing your laptop, you stood up moving closer to Seungkwan. Unlike you, who read the email many times, Seungkwan had already started his research. Not that he really needed to, everyone at the office knew that he was a huge fan of figure skating. So of course he would know all about Yoon Jeonghan.

The nation's pride and joy in figure skating, at least in the make category.

"Why scared? I thought everyone loved him"

It was impossible to look away from the picture Seungkwan had open on his computer. Jeonghan's face really was something else, as if he had been carved in marble by some ancient Greek artist. From his dark hair covering his eyes, giving him almost a mysterious vibe, to the way his lips were slightly crooked into a smile. You had to give it to him, the man was absolutely stunning. No wonder he left a trail of fans everywhere he went.

"He isn't the biggest enthusiast when it comes to the press. He barely gives interviews so I guess doing a documentary about him won't be easy"

Seungkwan kept scrolling, reading the latest news on Jeonghan. But the truth was that there wasn't any. His social media was also rarely updated, the last post was from months before.

"Well, good luck to you"

"What do you mean? You're the one in charge"

You just shook your head. The problem was Jeonghan honestly, you barely knew anything about him, though Seungkwan's words didn't help the case. The thing was that you barely knew anything at all about sports, in general, much less about figure skating. Lack of knowledge was an easy fix. The real issue was the fact that a documentary on a sport was way too different from what you usually did.

"I'm not doing this one. I have other projects I want to work on. Plus, this is too sudden. They want us to start tomorrow, Seungkwan. Do you really think that it's possible to have anything done by tomorrow?" he shook his head and you nodded in agreement "Precisely, so I'm sure that if we talk with Jihoon…"

"Nothing will change"

A curse left your lips at the sudden voice behind you. Turning around you faced the small man. Jihoon had his arms crossed over his chest and the look in his eyes that told you that no matter what he wouldn't let you off the hook. Still, you had to try.

"Jihoon, I'm not your sports person. And it's too soon. I don't anything about Jeonghan or figure skating"

Jihoon simply shook his head at you.

"They want a different approach than the average sports documentary, so I recommended you. I'm sending Seungkwan with you because I know this isn't your area of expertise, though I highly suggest you do some sort of research" he turned around to leave with a wave of his hand then turned around for a second, as if remembering something "Hansol will be your camera and sound guy. They asked for a small crew"

With a salute Jihoon left.

"Fuck"

You couldn't take your eyes away from the crutches under Jeonghan's arms and the orthopedic boot around his left leg. There was not a single article that pointed to surgery. There were plenty about his constant injuries though. Seungkwan had the same look on his face, of pure shock.

"Are you okay?" you asked once he made himself comfortable on the couch.

Jeonghan sat sideways on the couch, his leg propped up over cushions. The position looked weird but he didn't seem to mind.

"Ah, this" he pointed at his leg nonchalantly, as if it was the most normal thing "Yeah, it's okay. Had to get the surgery done in order to make it to the next Olympic"

Nodding, you looked around. His apartment wasn't as big as you had expected. In fact, the three of you stood closely together in the living room, a bit too small for all the gear Hansol said he needed.

"Put your things down, let's talk. I don't know how this is going to work"

Me neither, you wanted to say but kept your mouth shut. Thankfully, Seungkwan was there to help you.

"Before we start any real interview or conversation, I think we have to tell you that this was very last minute for us. We only heard about this documentary yesterday, in the middle of the afternoon" he used his kindest voice, his voice laced with concern and a hit of fear, maybe "yn is in charge, she's the documentarist, she'll be asking the questions and dictating the overall direction that we're going to take with the documentary. I'm Seungkwan and that's Hansol. This is the smallest crew he could assemble"

Seungkwan was giving too many explanations, you felt. But he also wasn't wrong. What he did was normal, he was just introducing the crew. Maybe you were a little irritated by the way you were tossed into this job, without someone giving you enough time to prepare. Sixteen hours were barely enough.

"I assume my… reputation has gotten to you," Jeonghan said, a small smile on his lips.

A reputation he had indeed. Jeonghan was known for not liking the press and journalists. He avoided them at all costs and once, on one occasion, was seen being rude. And honestly, you had to give him a pass for it. Pushing the camera away from his face, almost delicately, could barely be considered rude at such a moment. There were way too many cameras around, all of them on his face, trying to get some sort of pronouncement on why he had not made it to the podium.

And that had been years before but people still remembered him by that one moment. But what exactly did they expect? He underperformed, came in fourth place, and injured himself in the process. Was anyone expecting a happy and bright Jeonghan?

"You can be comfortable around me. A conversation like this is fine. I just don't like being swarmed"

Though his words were inviting, his face told a whole different story. He clearly didn't want this documentary.

"All of our interactions will be recorded," you told him, not leaving room for arguments on his end "These first few minutes aren't, out of courtesy and so that we can set our goals. I need to know if you're uncomfortable with anything, or something that you don't want to be filmed, either right now or before we turn the cameras on. Once we start, we won't stop"

Jeonghan adjusted his position on the couch, his eyes never leaving you. It was like he was measuring your every move. He didn't like your tone, and how aggressive you were towards him.

"I know this was last minute and I apologize for that. This is going to be my last run and, as much as I hate to admit, I'm a bit sensitive to it.

With furrowed eyebrows, you nodded. Jeonghan knew that you didn't believe him or that you cared about his reasons. He knew that the sole reason you were there was because someone made you.

"Will you need to film my family?"

"Yes, usually film family members to get a complete idea of someone's life"

Turning around you nodded at Hansol, telling him to start setting up. With a shake of his head, Seungkwan moved to help him.

"I don't want my family to know the extent of my injuries. So if you only want them for context, to know about me as a child, that's fine. But they can't know anything about this" Jeonghan pointed at his leg "I've been hiding this for a very long time and I'd like to keep it that way"

You dropped your bag on the couch, eyes tired and mind filled with one too many thoughts. The day had been easier than you expected, far more so.

Based on Seungkwan's words you had expected to fight with Jeonghan in a way. It was a documentary so you needed him to talk and talk he did. There was no question unanswered or dodged, all of his answers were precise and consistent. All of it had sounded fake like he had rehearsed them a million times.

Even if you thought that your question had been good, and had caught him off guard, Jeonghan seemed to be fully prepared for it. He didn't hesitate for a second.

In the few hours you spent around him, you finally managed to understand the fascination most people had with him. He was handsome, yes, but that was just the very basic and surface level of him. Beyonce that he was also good with his words. It was hard to tell that he was lying because he talked with conviction. After just one interview you were sure that if one day Jeonghan decided to tell you that your mom wasn’t actually your mother, you’d somehow believe him.

And the man knew all of it. He was aware of his beauty and charm, of what it did to normal people, and he used it in his favor. Jeonghan knew that most people couldn’t resist a handsome talented man. And that was a part he was all too willing to fill.

“Yeah,” you answered your phone, not bothering to see who it was, certain that it was just Jihoon.

“How was it today?” he sounded just as tired as you felt and you couldn’t help but wonder if he was okay.

“Fine”

“Just fine?”

You turned on your back, facing the ceiling, or at least whatever you could see with the lights turned off - not a whole lot, to be honest.

“He lied through his teeth today. There was no manager, and no coach around, though I do remember him saying someone would come. The person never showed up” you sighed “Seungkwan hates and Vernon probably thinks I’m a crazy bitch. So yeah, just fine”

Jihoon laughed on the other side of the line and you felt the little butterflies in your stomach come to life. You rolled your eyes at yourself. How pathetic it was of you, to have a crush on your boss. How very much bland of you.

Growing up, like a lot of girls that were influenced by way too much TV, you had wanted the be the odd one out. The I’m one of the guys kind of girl, or the one who refused to wear any kind of makeup or even come close to the pink because that was just girly for you. And now there you were, in love with the color pink, finding excuses to wear pretty dresses, and having a crush on your boss.

Teenage you would throw eggs at your head if she had the chance.

“Okay, but how was Jeonghan?” Jihoon pressed even further.

You sighed and closed your eyes, covering over face with your hand.

“He was polite, answered all of my questions, had a pleasant smile the entire time, and only asked for a bathroom break while we were there. Offered us food and drinks. He was fine” you said again, emphasizing the fine.

You could picture Jihoon, nodding his head and looking at the floor, probably thinking of what to ask next.

“Why would Seungkwan hate you? And why would Vernon think you’re a bitch?”

“Seungkwan thinks I went too hard on Jeonghan and Vernon just trusts Seungkwan’s judgment and goes with it”

Jihoon laughed again and you heard him moving around.

“Classic yn, going at someone while she’s angry. At least your anger was sort of directed to the right person”

“What is that supposed to mean?” you sat up.

You liked to think that you didn’t act that way all the time. In your mind, most of the time, you were able to hide your anger and just play nice like your mother had taught you to be. Jihoon’s words told a completely different story.

“Have some rest, there’s still a lot of work to do. Tomorrow you’re going with him to rehab, right?” Jihoon paused for a second and you heard a female voice in the back, you couldn’t make out what she said but you were sure of who it belonged to “I have to go. We’ll talk next week”

The line was disconnected and leaned back on the couch again. The problem of having a crush on your boss was also the fact that he had a long-time girlfriend and soon he was supposed to be marrying her.

You groaned, wondering if you had gone far enough that there was no going back from this crush.

You sat across from Jeonghan once again, the position exactly the same as the first day. But this time you chose to be less irritable.

The other day you were frustrated because you had to give up other projects to be able to accompany Jeonghan and that, thinking rationally, had nothing to do with him. He asked for a specific documentary filmmaker profile and you were chosen by the studio. Maybe it was more your fault than his. But it was also a no-return kind of situation. The job was assigned to you and there was nothing you could do to change it. So the least you could do was do your best and pray that it didn’t take a turn for the worse.

And, if anything, the conversation with Jihoon helped you focus on work. It wouldn't be the first time you were doing something you didn't want to do and it certainly wouldn't be the last. So you decided that the best thing to do was just work, showing your professional side that had been left aside before.

Jeonghan looked at you the same way, eyes serious as if he was ready for a new attack.

"Thank you," he said to Vernon, who had just placed the microphone inside his jacket, so that he could pick up the sound well, but it was not visible to the camera.

You turned to Seungkwan and Vernon, waiting for confirmation from the two that you could begin. You received a wave from each of them after they checked that the cameras were on and recording.

You took a deep breath and turned to Jeonghan.

"I wanted to apologize for yesterday," you said "I wasn't fair to you. I was irritated by things that had nothing to do with you, but I somehow decided that they did"

Everyone in Jeonghan's living room seemed to hold their breath, you included. You didn't know what to expect from Jeonghan, not really. You had been anything but ungracious with him, in a way that to most people meant that any door between you two had closed.

Jeonghan decided, at that moment, that he had two options: a) he could let the previous day dictate how all interactions between the two of you from then on would be, and it would be many months of a bad relationship that would bring no benefit to anyone involved in it; or b) he could accept your apology, which seemed sincere enough, and let go of the discomfort he felt.

Option b was actually the only possible choice.

“Okay” he finally smiled “my reputation isn’t the best, either way”

Seungkwan and Vernon breathed a sigh of relief. It was as if a huge gray cloud had moved away and the weather was beginning to clear.

“No, your reputation had no influence. I was the one who lost my hand because of my problems and for that, I apologize” you said and you were sincere in your words “But Jeonghan, I need you to stop seeing me as your enemy. I need you to be honest with me.”

You hoped Jeonghan could understand what you were saying.

“You think I wasn’t honest?” he tilted his head as if analyzing you.

“In the same way that you don't want your reputation to affect the way I see you, I need you to not let the way you see other journalists affect the way you see me. I want to tell your story, however you want it told, but I need you to be honest with me.”

You hoped Jeonghan could understand what you were saying.

He was silent for a minute, his eyes fixed on his hands. His hair covered his face, so it was hard to get an idea of what was going through his head.

You looked at Seungkwan, seeking confirmation that you hadn’t been rude. He seemed to be as lost as you were, but the small smile he gave you was enough to make your restless heart rest for a second.

“What if I say something and regret it later?”

It was the first time Jeonghan looked insecure and it was a strange sight, but much more realistic than the other version of him.

“We can edit it, it’s not a problem. I said that because I was angry” you said apologetically once again.

“Can we throw it all away and start again?”

Jeonghan smiled and you had no choice but to smile along with him.

“Let’s start with what’s happening now,” you said, folding your legs under your body, notebook open to a blank page and a pen ready to take notes “You underwent surgery not long ago, right? Why?"

Jeonghan took a deep breath, eyes closed for a second before placing all his attention on you. His gaze was almost too intense. You had to force yourself not to look anywhere but at him.

“A few years ago I fell during training and twisted my ankle. At the time, it wasn't a big deal and if I had stayed quiet for a few weeks, and did everything right, I wouldn't have had any problems. But I couldn't do it, I was preparing for a competition. I didn't tell anyone about the problem and just endured the pain. When I participated in the competition I fell again and that only made the situation worse. Today I have a problem with my ligament and tendon.”

With every word that left his mouth, you felt like a lump was forming in your throat, and with every second it was getting bigger.

Unlike the day before, it didn't seem like Jeonghan was lying, but you didn't know if you wanted the truth he was sharing. Even if it was a lie, a character he had created, the version of Jeonghan from before was a little brighter, a little more present in the moment. The version of him that was in front of you, that you imagined to be the closest to reality, was almost sad, detached from everything.

“Because I forced my right knee a lot, trying to compensate for the lack of my left one, I developed a problem with that one too”

“You’ve never talked about your injuries before, right?” he nodded “Why talk now?”

He was silent again, his lower lip caught between his teeth. That was a great question, one that not even Jeonghan himself knew exactly how to answer.

“I'm not sure, to be honest” he laughed a little. Instead of looking directly at the camera, his eyes were focused on you “Someone came up with the idea at some point and it didn't seem like a bad one, but I think it will only work if I make it to the Olympics.”

“Is that the ultimate goal then, to get to the Olympics?”

He shook his head, that fearless, confident look you had only seen in photos finally making itself known.

“No, the ultimate goal is to win”

As promised, Jeonghan waited for you, Seungkwan, and Vernon outside the clinic. He was nowhere to be seen, really, but the car his assistant informed you of was parked right in front of the door.

You were the first one to exit your own car, while Seungkwan and Vernon prepared the camera to follow along. You could only assume he was the manager. Terribly young for a manager, sure, but a manager nonetheless.

“I assume you’re in” he extended a hand to you “I’m Joshua”

“Hi”

The exchange of words with Joshua was quick, no more than half a dozen. You didn't have much to talk about with him and he wasn't your priority, at least not at the moment. Later, at some other time, talking to him would be great. He had introduced himself as a friend/manager of Jeonghan. Having his point of view would be great and could contribute a lot, but your eyes couldn't leave Jeonghan.

His hair was tied back, but a cap covered much of his face. He had barely said hi to you or the other two. It wasn't a big surprise. While it was true that made up to a certain extent, you didn't expect him to simply welcome you with open arms, but his reaction was strange - or as strange as the reaction of a person you knew little, or nothing, could be.

“Can we film it?” You asked.

Jeonghan stopped and turned towards you. He had forgotten that you and your team would attend his first physical therapy session, but it seemed like the right thing to do.

Since the last time you saw each other, Jeonghan spent hours on end watching documentaries made by you and they all had one thing in common: they were almost like video logs. You followed everyone around documenting every tiny aspect of their lives. All those people told their stories and didn't seem afraid of having their lives exposed. And perhaps for people who didn't lead lives where they had been exposed too much, sincerity came easily.

For Jeonghan, that was never the case.

Being treated as the future, a promise of the sport, had brought a lot of harm and situations that neither he, nor anyone else, had the option to deal with or even, perhaps, ignore.

Cameras were pointed at him, rumors spread and suddenly he wasn't just Yoon Jeonghan, the boy who started skating because it would annoy his little sister. He became someone from whom people expected something.

As much as he could, Jeonghan tried to live up to all of those expectations, realistic or not. He tried to be as perfect as possible, on the ice and off of it. And it only took one day of silence, a few rude unanswered questions, and one bad performance — which had no real effect — for everything to collapse.

“You said you would film anything and everything.”

You grimaced, clearly regretful and maybe even a little embarrassed. It wasn't his intention, but he found your reaction funny anyway.

In your place, Jeonghan would have done much worse.

“Do you think it’s important?”

You nodded, perhaps more forcefully than necessary. Jeonghan laughed, he wanted to hold your head to make sure it was still in the right place.

“The documentary is about your return, so filming you here is important. I asked because it's your first session. I heard it can be painful.”

“It will probably be uncomfortable” he couldn’t deny that “Let’s do it like this, you can record it, if in the end you think it’s bad or that it doesn’t fit, we won’t use it

You quietly followed Jeonghan and Joshua out of the clinic, Seungkwan and Vernon trailing behind you talking in hushed tones. It was no surprise that they were talking. Truth was rehab had been brutal. You knew that it could get hard for Jeonghan, that it could be painful but nothing really prepared you for what you saw. And if it was hard for you to watch him go through that, it was unimaginable to understand how it was for him.

Throughout the entire session, Jeonghan looked in pain, his grunts and the scowl on his face growing with each passing second and new movement. Midway through you told Seungkwan and Vernon to stop filming. You had seen enough and you had more than what you needed for the documentary.

You would only film his rehab again when he was no longer in such pain, you decided. Out of the many things you learned about Jeonghan was that showing his weaknesses wasn’t something he was too fond of or even comfortable with the idea of it. So there was no real reason to keep recording and you couldn’t stand it either.

While you watched his face contort in pain, you felt something inside your chest tighten.

It had never been a real issue before with you. You had always managed to separate your personal emotions from the things you felt while working. More often than not you told stories that were hard to listen to, took someone’s suffering, and put it on the TV for the entire world to see in hopes that maybe a part of their lives would be changed. You had always been able to detach yourself from that.

However while inside with Jeonghan, such a thing was not possible. You felt your throat constrict and your eyes grow wet and for a short while, you couldn’t breathe either. It made no sense really. Why did it hurt to see this man, you knew nothing about, in pain to the point you wanted to cry? Why did it sadden you so much that he was limping harder than before?

You wanted to approach him, ask if he was okay, if it had been too much. But it was out of line, it was one that you knew you shouldn’t cross. There was this itch though, in the back of your mind, begging you to just ask, to just take a step closer to him.

It happened so suddenly that you didn’t even see it happening. One second it was just the five of you in the parking lot, in the next there were reporters with mics and cameras pointed at Jeonghan. You noticed how Jeonghan raised his shoulders at the same time he lowered his head. He couldn’t see in front of himself, you were certain.

Joshua put an arm around Jeonghan’s shoulder while he used the other one to keep them away from him. Not that it was of any use. One of the cameras was directly under his face as if trying to get an expression, anything at all, that could show his discomfort with the situation. From somewhere behind you there were flashes.

"Do you believe your injury was a result of your own carelessness?" someone asked.

You felt your blood run cold for a second and you froze in place, Seungkwan and Vernon behind you.

"Do you think your skating career is over after such devastating injuries?" someone followed.

"Did you regret pushing yourself so hard during training, knowing it led to your injury?"

"How did it feel to watch other skaters progress while you were stuck in rehab?"

"Are you worried that your injury will define your career more than your achievements on the ice?"

The questions got progressively worse and you wanted to scream at them to just shut up, and stop. How could they just ambush someone like that with those questions? It made no sense at all. And though you knew that it would cause more harm than good you wished Jeonghan would tell them all to fuck off.

Instead, he kept his head low and just slowly walked to his car while ignoring everyone around him, all the careless words being thrown at him.

You tried to take a step forward but were held back by Seungkwan, who gripped the strap of your purse. He didn’t say a word, just shook his head.

“They can’t just do that to him” you almost cried

“If you say anything, it might only make matters worse,” Hansol said, his voice sad.

That sudden need to protect Jeonghan felt weird but oddly natural as well. Weird because you knew that you shouldn’t, because you hardly knew the guy. Natural because it felt as if you had always done that like it was just second nature to you.

“He is used to this,” Seungkwan said, still not letting go of your purse.

“He shouldn’t be! They are barely treating him like a human!”

By the time you turned around, Jeonghan was already inside the car leaving the parking lot.

The clock on the top of your phone screen told you that it was 4:37 am. You hadn't even realized that you had spent so many hours still awake.

As soon as you got home from the rehab with Jeonghan, you took a quick shower, ate the leftovers from the night before, and started to look up Jeonghan’s performances.

The man was a celebrity amongst athletes since he was a child. He was always seen as a promise of the sport. He was good from the start. Performing moves that he was still too young to do, entering competitions boys his age never really competed in and somehow managing to either come up to the podium or even winning some of them.

Everything was displayed online. Yearly competitions, practices, and small moments of his life.

Jeonghan's entire life, at least the sports part, was exposed on the internet for anyone, from anywhere in the world, to see. And it wasn't just the competitions, having videos of that part seemed completely normal and expected.

What was scary was all the other content. Some photos of him in school uniform, not one where he was actually looking at the camera, but ones that were clearly taken in secret. Another one from when he seemed to have simply gone out for coffee with Joshua.

You knew he had fans, that he was liked wherever he went, and that he was always followed, but that seemed a bit much.

In reality, watching videos of the competitions was like a gateway to everything that came after.

You knew very little about Jeonghan, only what you had read about in all the articles that you found and all of them had one thing in common: Jeonghan was a huge diva, who thought he was superior to everyone. But after seeing how he had been treated that day, as soon as he got out of rehab, you knew it wasn't like that. It was as if they had appeared out of nowhere, one second the parking lot was empty and the next it was full of journalists, shouting things and asking questions that to many would seem harmless, but were clearly intended to hurt.

Instead of watching more competition videos, not that there were many you hadn't watched yet, you decided to look for the famous video of him treating journalists badly.

You had never found one so easily on the internet. You just typed "Jeonghan and journalists" into the search bar and it was the first video to appear.

It was a scene very similar to the previous day. Jeonghan was in the parking lot, walking towards the guy when he was surrounded by several journalists.

"You didn't get the podium today, are you disappointed?" one of them asked and that was the most harmless question he got. “Did you really try hard or did you think you would get a high score because you were the favorite?” “Why did you fall in such a simple jump?” “Don't you think it was an amateur's performance?”

You didn't want to keep listening to all those meaningless questions, but you couldn't take your eyes off Jeonghan. He still had short hair at the time, even covering his eyebrows. His jaw was clenched, his eyes were hard, and his gaze was focused straight ahead, as he walked slowly to his car. Joshua tried as best he could to control the journalists with their microphones and cameras, but he was just one man against many. Finally, after what felt like ages, two security guards appeared, pushing the journalists away as they began shouting profanities in Jeonghan's direction.

Could those people even consider themselves journalists? Real journalists, who took their work seriously?

There is a very fine line between being a journalist who asks incisive questions and one who is completely disrespectful to the athlete. And those people were anything but professional.

It was no surprise that after that Jeonghan refused to give interviews.

That whole situation happened years before, at the beginning of the previous Olympic cycle, but even so, it was still a moment that haunted him. People remembered him as just that guy, someone who refused to answer simple questions. But what exactly did these people expect? That he was all smiles when he failed to reach the podium, even though he was the favorite in the competition? That he smiles when he hurts?

Finally, you managed to understand why he acted that way, and why his answers were so polite and direct. Jeonghan didn't want to leave room for interpretation. Not that he had much of a choice. People only see what they want to see, but that didn't mean he couldn't try.

Jeonghan couldn’t take his eyes away from your back, he followed your every move. You stood next to Joshua, talking to him quietly, his friend showing you something on his phone. He felt something scratch at his neck. This new and unknown feeling.

It was unusual for Jeonghan, to want to have someone’s undivided attention. It was usually the other way around and he was never willing to do it, with anyone. And then there you were and suddenly he didn’t like that you were talking with Joshua.

It wasn’t like you seemed to be having fun either. You moved around with intention, your eyes always focused, your words and questions firm and straight to the point. Jeonghan couldn’t help but wonder if it was always like that with you. If your professional persona always took over who you were in other moments.

His curiosity was huge but his courage to ask was very little.

“She may seem like it, but she won’t bite your head off if you talk with her,” someone said on his left.

Seungkwan stood at his side, his hands clasped in front of him while he rocked on his heels.

“I think she will,” Jeonghan said.

Seungkwan took his reply as an invitation to sit.

“You know, in the office, people call her the ice queen” he too looked in your direction, at your serious expression "She’s like that most of the time”

Jeonghan looked at Seungkwan expectantly, he knew there was a but coming soon. All he needed to do was wait long enough.

“She didn’t want to take this job, our boss forced her to. She’s more into storytelling, real people, with real issues”

“Am I not a real person?”

The offense in Jeonghan’s voice made Seungkwan almost fall off his chair. He didn’t intend for his words to sound like that.

“Of course you are” he laughed nervously while trying to explain it as best as he could “If it were up to her, she would focus this documentary on you, on how you started skating, why, what attracted you to it, how it affected the rest of your life. But your team doesn’t want that, I think. We were told that you already gave many interviews on the matter so there’s no point in talking about it again. They want us to focus on your recovery and then you make it to the Olympics. She’s trying to figure out how to do that in a way that makes someone watch it”

Jeonghan nodded, feeling guilty. It had been his request to not the documentary so focused on the past and more on what was happening in the moment

“She also doesn’t like sports and hated the idea of the job, but that's beside the point”

Both of them laughed, eyes still on your back now that you talked with Vernon, giving him new instructions.

“I’ll make sure that she gets to do the kind of documentary she thinks is best”

Seungkwan stood up, a big smile on his lips.

“Who could have known that the ice queen and the ice prince aren’t actually that cold”

After months of just rehab, it’s finally time for Jeonghan to get back on the ice and it pained you a little to admit that you were looking forward to it. The videos you watched could only take you so far, you wanted to actually see the real thing. Him, in action.

Of course, you know that he wasn’t going to be able to do a third of the things he did on those videos. But you wanted to see him in his element, how he would behave when he was finally around the thing he loved the most in the world — his words, not yours.

The one thing you were able to learn from Jeonghan was the fact that he indeed loved what he did. Like most people, sometimes he hated it. It was the thing he was most passionate about, yes, but it was also his job, so there were days when he just hated and the mere idea of leaving the house was too much.

It was too hard to be a professional athlete, it demanded way too much of him. Of anyone, really. Sometimes he wanted to be like everyone else and just not put everything he was into it. But if he did that, he lost one single day, he was scared that he could lose an entire year and maybe that year turned into two and then he could lose his chance to go to the Olympics.

And he only had one change left.

So, instead of focusing on much he didn’t want to do, Jeonghan decided to focus on the fact that there was only a year ahead of him and he would be able to do whatever he wanted and have as many down days as he wanted.

He didn’t know what he wanted to do and what would be the after for him but it gave him something to look forward to.

“Are you nervous?” you asked him.

Jeonghan was someone who was mostly quiet. You noticed that once he started to feel more comfortable he was one to start the conversation and even crack a few jokes here and there. Seungkwan had been the first person he kind of opened up to, which had left you a hint of jealousy. You wanted to be one he talked with mostly because it was your job but also just because.

However, he had been especially quiet that day. The three of you went to meet him at his apartment. The idea was that you’d follow him the entire day, from the moment he woke up, to when he went to the doctor to get the final clear and then finally to the ring.

He had talked very little, his eyes always focused somewhere else. It was clear that his mind was traveling somewhere far, far away. So you left him be, quietly watching him just move around. A silent shooting day, you told yourself In the end, however, you had a job and he needed to do the talking.

“It’s been too long,” he said, his eyes never really leaving the ice “I don’t know if I can still do it”

You laughed, causing him to finally look at you, eyes wide on his face. He tried to look serious but the corners of his lips were turned slightly up.

“You just don’t feel confident, but you didn’t forget it” you looked at his ankle, it was still weird to see him without any sort of protection around it “How’s your ankle?”

He just shook his head and in that moment you chose to believe that he was said It doesn’t bother me anymore.

Through the interviews, you found out that Jeonghan is the kind of person to suffer in silence. It was clear from all of his previous injuries, how he competed while in pain and only ever said anything when it was almost too late.

“Do you think I can still do it?”

There was something in his voice like he was almost on the verge of breaking. He sounded vulnerable in a way that was entirely too new, in a way you wanted to push Vernon and his camera away because that was a part of him you knew he didn’t want the world to see.

Instead, you reached for his arm, patting it a couple of times, hoping that your touch, as ungraceful and awkward as it was, was able to soothe him, even if it was just for a moment.

“I was watching some of your competitions last night, again, you know? And that guy? He’s still in there, I’m sure of it, I’ve seen him”

You weren’t just saying that to cheer him up, your words were true. You had seen that version of him, little glimpses here and there. He was in the way his eyes suddenly changed and it was like he owned the entire room, in the way he suddenly turned confident, in the way he was charming in a way that was almost sickening but all too enchanting either way.

Whether or not he believed it himself, Yoon Jeonghan was a force to be reckoned with.

"What kind of kid were you?" you asked, looking up at Jeonghan.

He sat opposite to you, bent down to tie the laces on his skates. His hair covered his face, you were sure that he couldn't see much, but he didn't seem bothered by it in the least. Maybe he had just gotten used to it.

Four months had gone by since you started to follow Jeonghan and even before that, he had kept his hair long. And you hated to admit that he looked good, too good even.

"What kind do you think I was?" He smirked at you for a second before going back to his skates.

Rolling your eyes, you couldn't help but smile.

"This is not how it works. I ask the questions here"

Jeonghan leaned back on his seat, giving you his full attention. His smirk did something to your insides. It felt tight and loose at the same time, like wild butterflies running around on your skin.

"Come on, humor me"

You pretended to be in deep thought, Jeonghan as a child had been something you thought about for a long time now. Even though he was very serious most of the time there were these small moments where he looked like a kid ready to do something he wasn't supposed to.

"I can only think of you as a troublemaker” you smiled, closing your notes knowing well that you’d make no progress at all with the filming “I’ve seen pictures of you and a child and although you looked very cute, I’m sure you were a handful to your mother”

Jeonghan laughed, throwing his head back and in that moment he looked so carefree.

Even since the start of the documentary Jeonghan had used his most serious expressions, a frown always taking over his beautiful features. But he had been back on the ice for a few days already and in those days he had looked the happiest you had seen him yet.

Of course, he still hasn’t practiced the way he wanted or the way he used to. He still needed to take things slowly: fewer hours, less power in the movements. But it was undeniable that he was a completely different person.

It wasn’t that he had been in a bad mood every single day but there was just something about him in his element, of him doing something he was obviously passionate about, that was so enchanting that it became impossible to look away from him.

“Where did you see those pictures?”

“You do know that I had to google you because I had no idea who you were, right?”

One thing you managed to learn about Jeonghan is the fact that, if in the right mood, he is a trickster and most of all, a flit. You weren’t even sure that he was aware of what he was doing, it seemed like second nature to him.

He put a hand over his chest, faking being in pain. His face contorted and a pout on his lips.

“I thought we were getting to know each other”.

Seungkwan coughed by your side, finally making you remember that there were people around you and that the entire interaction between you and Jeonghan was being recorded.

There was something about Jeonghan that always seemed to make you forget where you were, that maybe there were people around you. You could only suppose that it was the charm of a man who knew exactly what he was doing, who knew how to sweet talk someone.

And Jeonghan knew what he was doing, what kind of words or looks could get a reaction from a woman.

Most of the time while around Jeonghan you had to remind your heart to be calm and quiet. Being around him was a temporary arrangement, as soon as the Olympics started said arrangement would be done and you’d have to go back to your normal life. One that didn’t include Yoon Jeonghan. And you also knew that there wasn’t space for you in his life.

“We’re going to set up the cameras around the ice,” Seungkwan said awkwardly while dragging Verno by the hand.

You watched as the two walked away from you, whispering in secrecy. You could only imagine the kind of things that they were saying. If you knew Seungkwan at all, you were certain that it couldn’t be any good.

“Jeonghan, I ask questions and you answer them. And while one could say that I’m getting to know you, I don’t think it would be possible to say the same thing about me”

Jeongahn's smile was defiant when he crossed his arms over his chest.

“You have a no-bullshit policy, which I should have known, from the start, but I wasn’t expecting someone like you. Although you try really hard to pretend that you’re not, your eyes are kind and you quietly take care of those around you, me included sometimes. You got worried when I was in pain in rehab and when Vernon got hurt it seemed as if you were angry, but you were concerned about him and after that, you asked to have another staff with you so that he wouldn’t need to carry so many things on his own. You and Seungkwan bicker a lot but when he isn’t around for a day you are quieter and your questions have been more direct. That doesn’t make you a lousy documentarist, please don’t think that I’m saying that, you take your job very seriously. I’m saying that you put people above your job. I’m guessing that’s why you wanted to become a documentarist, to begin with, to tell stories”

You stared at him, mouth open wondering just how he had come up with all of that and why he had managed to hit everything right on the stop. Especially the reason why you became a documentarist. It seemed very obvious, yes, but it wasn’t something that you had said.

In fact, your personal life was something that very few people knew. You weren’t one to share your thoughts and what was on your mind with people. Seungkwan was a good friend, but he was a work friend so your personal life was just that, personal. Not that you had someone to share it with, either way.

The apartment was empty when you left and it was in the exact same way and you got back. You were on your own, with no parents, no siblings and most of your friends had given up on you somewhere along the way.

For the longest time, you put your job first. It came before anything and anyone. You were building your career and name at the time so it was hard not to put it first. It was your dream, one that your friends supported at first but were displeased when you decided to put it first.

You had thought that if you made it big on your job if you got hired by a big production company, you’d be able to find the happiness that you had searched for a long time. And while some of it was true, your career was on the right path and you did something you loved, you didn’t have a lot more beyond that going one.

It was become just you and your job.

Was it sad? Yes, but it was also the life you chose.

“Just because I don’t know details of your life, doesn’t mean that I don’t watch you, yn”

You watched as Jeonghan fell for what felt like the hundredth time that day. It didn't make sense, not really. At least not for you. And from the looks of it, for him too.

He was frustrated and completely angry. All those people looking at him, expectations high, waiting for something. He wasn't sure what. For him to fail? To see if he still could do it?

Everything was possible and impossible at the same time.

He couldn't stop his eyes from going after you every time you fell. Somehow, your reaction was the only one that mattered to him. The first few times your face was completely emotionless, as if you were staring at a blank wall. Then Jeonghan fell once again, and again, and again. He stopped counting at 10, but he knew it was much more than that actually. But your gaze, which was fixed on him, became more worried as the minutes passed and he hated being the cause of it.

Somehow, since he met you, only two things were on Jeonghan's mind: skating and you.

He didn't know how, he didn't know why, but you had taken over his every thought. It was as if you had walked through an imaginary door and entered his mind and decided that it was a great place to be.

Even on days when you didn't see each other because there was no recording, he was tempted to talk to you. And on one of those days, he just succumbed to the temptation of picking up the phone and calling you.

“Jeonghan, is everything okay?” was the first thing you said.

He hated that worry was the first emotion he awakened in you. He hated that the first thing you said wasn't "hello" like a normal person. But at the same time, the concern made him feel somehow welcomed. It could, of course, be all in his head, and what he saw as concern for himself was actually concern for the documentary.

"I just wanted to talk," he admitted.

Maybe it was because he had gotten used to talking to you, maybe it was because you offered zero judgment for the way he thought or reacted. Or maybe it was because it was you. Whatever it was, Jeonghan felt comfortable talking to you.

Telling the truth, about everything, was not difficult, in fact, it became something very easy. It was because of you, he knew.

"I realized I don't know anything about you"

You laughed and he listened as you moved through what he imagined to be his apartment.

"That's because I interview you and not the other way around"

He sat on the bed, his legs stretched out in front of him as he supported the rest of his weight on his arms stretched behind him.

"Do you think it's so bad that I know anything about you?"

You remained silent for a few seconds, seeming to think about the idea. It wasn't bad, not at all.

At several moments you found yourself with your cell phone in your hand, ready to send a message or call him. You weren’t sure what, but there was something about Jeonghan that just made you want to tell him everything.

"What do you want to know?" you said with a sigh.

"Whatever you want to share"

The great truth is that very little happened in your life. You lived alone, worked every day, and came home alone. Your last boyfriend, or even a fling, was over a year before. Your friends, if you could call them that, were all from work. Your life was quite still and dull. Even if you wanted to talk about work. Jeonghan was your job. There wasn't much to talk about.

"I don't think I have much to tell" you knew that what you were about to say wasn't the happiest topic in the world, but it was what you had to offer "My mother passed away when I was nineteen, since then I've been alone"

You could still clearly remember the day your father left. There wasn't a fight. He never packed his bag and left. One day he was there when you woke up, he gave you breakfast and took you to school, like he did on most days. But it was his job to pick you up and he never showed up. Your mother showed up instead, her eyes swollen as she did her smile to smile at you and explain to the teacher why she was so late. When you finally got home she said "Now it's just you and me. Daddy had to leave"

For months, years even, you waited for him to come back. You thought one day he would just appear in front of you. You were disappointed when it was your mother who showed up to pick you up when he didn't come to his birthdays when you called the number he had left with his mother and he never answered.

You waited until you turned 18 to go after him. You only had a name, but with that alone, a person can find everything on the internet. You found him in another state, working at a real estate agency. You sat down in front of him and talked for about half an hour. You made up a story about going to college and needing a place to live. You said your name and your mother's name several times, surname and everything, and at no point did he seem to connect one thing to the other. Until the last second, when you said you would think about renting the studio he had suggested, and he walked you to the door. He said, "I left for a reason, don't come back here."

You couldn't believe what you had heard. You couldn't understand why he left and why he never came back. But at that moment you decided that if he didn't want you, you didn't need him. Your mother had worked so hard to make sure you had everything you needed.

Exactly one year later, your mother died in a bizarre car accident. It was like being 7 years old again and losing another person, only in a much more painful way.

"You don’t have any siblings?" Jeonghan's voice on the other end brought you back "Relatives?"

You shook her head, even though you knew he couldn't see you.

"I was an only child, so no siblings. My mom was an orphan so relatives either. My father left when I was a child"

You and Jeonghan spent the whole night on the phone, talking about everything and nothing. From trivial things to more personal matters. His delight upon learning that you didn’t have a boyfriend didn’t go unnoticed.

Calls and messages became commonplace between the two of you. Your heart raced every time a new message arrived and it was hard to hide your disappointment when you realized it wasn't from him. On days when you didn't see each other, you would stare at your phone, waiting for it to ring, waiting for him to call.

So you hoped he understood when you shook your head in his direction, a request written on your face. That's enough for today, you can try more tomorrow, you hoped he would understand.

Instead of trying one more time after he fell once again, he skated to the edge of the ice. His face was red from the effort, and his chest rose and fell in an uneven rhythm trying to force air back into his lungs.

"I want everyone out," he said, his voice broken.

Seungkwan and Vernon didn't even question it, they simply started putting away the equipment. Jihoon, who had shown up unexpectedly to "supervise" didn't seem to understand what was going on, but turned to help Vernon.

Jeonghan's coach was the only one who approached him, his hand on the athlete's shoulder.

"Go home, rest. Tomorrow we try again"

Jeonghan shook his head. He would only get out of there after managing to make the damn jump, even if he had to stay the whole night.

"Just half an hour more, but I want to be alone"

The coach clearly didn't like the idea, but he knew it was stupid to try and make Jeonghan change his mind.

You turned to him, looking at his face, trying to figure out if he was in pain or if he was just being a big blockhead. Without giving yourself the luxury of thinking about what you were doing, you placed your hand over Jeonghan's and squeezed for a second. You hoped he understood what you meant.

"You have to rest"

You knew everyone was watching, that despite saying they were leaving they weren't actually moving. Jeonghan didn't seem to care and for a moment you decided not to care either.

“Stay,” he said softly, so only you could hear him “please.”

Some strands of hair were stuck to Jeonghan's face, you wanted to get them out of his face, but caution spoke louder. You looked over your shoulder and everyone was still looking at the two of you, but as soon as they noticed your gaze they started moving again. Seungkwan shouted “We’re leaving” and seconds later the door slammed.

Finally, you were alone.

“You have to rest,” you said again.

You took advantage of the fact that no one else was there and removed the strands of hair stuck to his forehead, tucking it behind his ear. Jeonghan sighed, his eyes closing as he leaned towards you. Just that little touch wasn't enough.

“I need to get it right”

"If you stop now and rest you will know what you are doing wrong"

A half smile shined on Jeonghan's face as he leaned further into the barrier, his face just inches away from his.

"My ego loves it when you say I'm doing something wrong”

You pushed him back, needing a little bit more space to yourself. He was too close, you could feel his breath on your nose and cheeks. It was suddenly as if the world was made of Yoon Jeonghan, it was just him and no one else.

“I’m sure your ego will be just fine”

Instead of pulling your hand back, you allowed it to stay in his chest. Jeonghan smiled for a second before pressing his hand over yours.

“Just another 30 minutes” he repeated what he said to his coach “I promise I’ll stop in precisely 30 minutes”

You nodded with a sigh. There was nothing you could do to stop him. Something told you that even if you threatened him to leave he would stay and practice, he would stay on the ice for far more than just 30 minutes if you weren’t around.

So you sat down and waited for him. And he fell time and time again, his face growing displeased with himself at each passing second, each time he jumped but didn't manage to land.

Jeonghan had done that same jump countless times before with ease as if one's body would simply perform such movements. To him, it always seemed as easy as walking. You had seen it in all of his videos, almost in trance by him.

“If you’re not done in twenty-one minutes” you pretended to look at your imaginary watch “I’m taking you out of there by force”

Jeonghan threw his head back, laughing.

“Remember when you said that you never skated before?” Jeonghan asked after finally being able to breathe properly again.

You weren’t too sure how, but he had stopped after 30 minutes. A big smile on his face after he managed to land the jump after so many tries. After getting it right once, he didn’t get it wrong again. It was like something clicked inside his brain as if he had found the last missing piece of the puzzle.

Of all the things you said to Jeonghan, from the most personal to the most trivial, that was, by far, the only one you regretted. You had told him over the phone but he looked horrified, it was easy to imagine the wide eyes on his face.

But him standing there, in front of you, with a smile that could only be seen on the face of a mischievous child, said much more than any words he could utter.

“No,” you said, shaking your head, already moving back.

You had learned several peculiarities about Jeonghan in all the months you spent by his side, and one of the most glaring was the look in his eyes when he was about to do something he shouldn't.

“You have to try, at least once” his lips were a mixture of a smile and a pout “You will have the best teacher in the world”

You saw it and shook your head again.

“I can’t trust a teacher who spent the day falling” you pointed to the rink behind him.

As soon as the words left your mouth, you regretted them. You didn't know if your words would offend him, you hoped he knew it wasn't your intention. But you also knew that hell was paved with good intentions. Jeonghan was silent for a minute, his face serious, his eyes not leaving yours for an entire minute.

Then he smiled, his nose wrinkling a little as he laughed, loudly. It didn't take long for you to join him.

“You’re evil,” he said, trying to control himself, but failing “This way you’re going to break my heart”

“I think there are few things in this world that can break your heart.”

You would definitely be one of them, Jeonghan wanted to say, but he held his tongue in his mouth. He knew he couldn't say that, he knew that any word said wrongly could simply ruin everything he had built so far. If he could even say he built something. He liked to think so.

From the first time you spoke, Jeonghan knew there was no going back, at least for him. He had never done anything like that. He had never called someone in the middle of the night simply because he wanted to hear someone's voice. And in this case, it wasn't just someone's voice, it was your voice that he wanted to hear.

With each passing sentence, Jeonghan found himself falling more in love with you and he wasn't able to say why. Maybe he could blame it on your eyes, always so focused, but somehow when they turned to him, they seemed so sweet and sincere. Or your voice, which gave orders and asked incisive questions, but as soon as the cameras were turned off it became gentle and almost shy. Maybe it was the fact that you seemed like a lioness when you were working, never giving space for unfounded questions, but you were shy when it was just the two of you alone.

He liked this version of you, who was right in front of him, who seemed completely comfortable with him, to the point of making jokes — something that until that moment you hadn't done yet.

“We always have extra pairs in the back, I'm sure one of them is your size” he had made sure you would, with Seungkwan's help of course “And then we try it, what do you think?”

Even though you were shaking your head, you went to the closet where you knew the skates were stored.

With your knees bent and shaking, you stepped onto the ice and immediately regretted giving in to Jeonghan's will. You didn't know how he had managed it, but in the closet, there was a brand new pair of skates, your size. Jeonghan had smiled as he bent down to tie your shoelaces,

“I’m going to fall flat on my face,” you said as you grabbed the bars.

Jeonghan held your face in his hands, your eyes fixed on his.

“I won’t let you fall”

The way the words left his lips made your heart skip a beat, or maybe several of them. You could feel it on the back of your throat and you could swear that your hands shook a little as you accepted the hand Jeonghan had extended to you.

You wished it could just stop. Not for your heart to stop beating altogether but for it to stop reacting to Jeonghan. Everything changed after that first call and you weren’t too sure of where it was. He had, someway, somehow, become a pivotal point of you. His voice, his eyes. The way tingles started to run down through your body the moment his skin came in touch with yours. How, despite all odds, he made you feel safe in a way you weren’t too sure you had ever experienced before.

When he said that he wasn’t going to you fall, you believed him so you held his hands — strong enough that you were sure were hurting him but he didn't seem to mind — and allowed Jeonghan to pull you into the rink.

“Don't move your feet” he said, voice ever so sweet but with a slight hint of teasing “I know it's probably hard, but let me take control here”

Forcing out all of the remaining air inside your lungs, you did as he asked. Instead of keeping your focus on the ice under your feet, you kept them in Jeonghan's face. A mistake, of course.

His eyes were too intense if you could say that. You didn't want to understand what was happening. Perhaps for the first time since you met Jeonghan, you didn't want to understand what it could mean. You were scared. What, exactly, you weren’t sure.

“I didn’t even have to ask you to look at me,” he said and you laughed a little, automatically looking away “Keep looking at me”

The whole experience of skating for the first time, or being guided, was not being registered by your brain. All you could see, think, feel, was Jeonghan, as if he had become a central point of everything.

“I think we should stop here”

You hoped your voice was loud enough and judging by the look on Jeonghan's face, it was. The smile fell from his lips and it was as if a small light in his eyes had gone out.

You hated that you were the one causing that reaction in him, but you knew it was best to stop everything before it went too far.

"I thought that…"

“We can’t blur the lines that much” you shook your head.

You didn't know exactly who you were trying to convince, him or you. You also weren't sure you had to convince yourself of anything. It was as if your brain had split in two. One part, probably the loudest, wanted you to just let things happen. You knew you weren't doing anything wrong, you weren't doing anything much really. What you did outside of your working hours and who you did it with was your problem and no one else's.

But the other part, one that spoke softly and that should have had much less strength, said it was dangerous, but also didn't offer much reason to be dangerous.

Yet somehow, that was the side you chose to listen to.

"Why?" He asked forcing his feet to the ground, making the two of you stand in the center of the rink. “What line are we blurring?”

You shook your head, hands clinging to his waist as you felt your feet begin to slide.

“I don’t know” you whispered in response “We are working”

Jeonghan leaned forward and pressed his lips to your cheek. With a sigh, he let his forehead fall onto your shoulder and closed his eyes.

You didn't know exactly where your skepticism came from, but you were also sure it wasn't completely unfounded. But truth be told, you wanted to blur that line and any others that might appear along the way.

“Go on a date with me,” he said “If you still feel that way, there’s nothing we can do. Just don’t… don’t stop something that hasn’t even started yet”

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