#cause i absolutely do not know basics that i should

[nedsseveredhead]

We really need to bring back Home Ec/Cooking classes to schools do you know how humiliating it is to have to google ‘how to cut a bell pepper’

[dykedvonte]

Mini rant below and in the tags, the only time I’ll talk about this and my personal take on it.

The way people talk about hypothetical male Anya on Twitter and the idea of how Mouthwashing would play out if the genders were swapped makes me remember how people still don’t take sexual assault and rape with male victims with the same gravity, especially when the perpetrator is female.

[skibasyndrome]

.

[here-there-were-dragons]

as a general rule, on average, if americans consistently complain about a food being conceptually weird, gross, and scary, then it probably tastes amazing. or at least inoffensive.

this is because in my experience americans for the most part (give or take a few exceptions by region) think eating literally anything other than beef, chicken, bread, eggs, peanut butter jelly sandwitches, ketchup, and disgusting cloyingly artificial brown sludge soda is insurmountably weird, gross, and scary.

[esleep]

i did some slightly physical housework (took all my houseplants out to the porch for a neem oil spray-down + very overdue pruning, and also wiped down the plant tables) and now my back hurts so bad i'm gonna have to just lay on the floor for the rest of the night. yup you're right doc no problems here, i should just try working out more 👍

[truckstoptigers]

there's nothing like knowing if your dad REALLY knew abt the abuse & what happened to you, he might call you a baby killer (vent in tags, please proceed with caution)

[playingonedchess]

bloody hheelll i havent had to do a presentation since like year nnniiinne

[exculis]

i really wish i was drilling holes in wood right now.

[racefortheironthrone]

Hi- er, this is my first-ever writer's strike, how does one not cross a picket line in this context? I know how not to do it with things like Amazon and IRL strikes, but how does it apply to media/streaming?

Hi, this is a great question, because it allows me to write about the difference between honoring a picket line and a boycott. (This is reminding me of the labor history podcast project that's lain fallow in my drafts folder for some time now...) In its simplest formulation, the difference between a picket line and a boycott is that a picket line targets an employer at the point of production (which involves us as workers), whereas a boycott targets an employer at the point of consumption (which involves us as consumers).

So in the case of the WGA strike, this means that at any company that is being struck by the WGA - I've seen Netflix, Amazon, Apple, Disney, Warner Brothers Discovery, NBC, Paramount, and Sony mentioned, but there may be more (check the WGA website and social media for a comprehensive list) - you do not cross a picket line, whether physical or virtual. This means you do not take a meeting with them, even if its a pre-existing project, you do not take phone calls or texts or emails or Slacks from their executives, you do not pitch them on a spec script you've written, and most of all you do not answer any job application.

Because if this strike is like any strike since the dawn of time, you will see the employers put out ads for short-term contracts that will be very lucrative, generally above union scale - because what they're paying for in addition to your labor is you breaking the picket line and damaging the strike - to anyone willing to scab against their fellow workers. GIven that one of the main issues of the WGA are the proliferation of short-term "mini rooms" whereby employers are hiring teams of writers to work overtime for a very short period, to the point where they can only really do the basics (a series outline, some "broken stories," and some scripts) and then have the showrunner redo everything on their lonesome, while not paying writers long-term pay and benefits, I would imagine we're going to see a lot of scab contracts being offered for these mini rooms.

But for most of us, unless we're actively working as writers in Hollywood, most of that isn't going to be particularly relevant to our day-to-day working lives. If you're not a professional or aspiring Hollywood writer, the important thing to remember honoring the picket line doesn't mean the same thing as a boycott. WGA West hasn't called on anyone to stop going to the movies or watching tv/streaming or to cancel their streaming subscriptions or anything like that. If and when that happens, WGA will go to some lengths to publicize that ask - and you should absolutely honor it if you can - so there will be little in the way of ambiguity as to what's going on.

That being said, one of the things that has happened in the past in other strikes is that well-intentioned people get it into their heads to essentially declare wildcat (i.e, unofficial and unsanctioned) boycotts. This kind of stuff comes from a good place, someone wanting to do more to support the cause and wanting to avoid morally contaminating themselves by associating with a struck company, but it can have negative effects on the workers and their unions. Wildcat boycotts can harm workers by reducing back-end pay and benefits they get from shows if that stuff is tied to the show's performance, and wildcat boycotts can hurt unions by damaging negotiations with employers that may or may not be going on.

The important thing to remember with all of this is that the strike is about them, not us. Part of being a good ally is remembering to let the workers' voices be heard first and prioritizing being a good listener and following their lead, rather than prioritizing our feelings.

[the-flaneur]

the worst attempt of nnn ever

pairing: f1 grid x gn!reader [headcanon]

ft. the whole 2024 grid

summary: technically everyone wins, aka who's most likely to fail nnn the quickest

warnings: shitpost/crack, very suggestive content and some 18+, MDNI, NSFW -> smut

[masterlist] [requests]

fail first

lewis

this man has zero discipline when it comes to you

absolute zero, zip, zilch, nada

normally he's on you 24/7

but when it comes to the end of the season and most things have been tied up and he dgaf, what better way to end each week than by fucking your brains out

aka 25/8 times a week

so when you attempt to propose to do nnn "for fun" on the 31st, he glares at you, calls you dumb before fucking you silly overnight (until the 1st) so that you never suggest it again that month/year

(he also bribes other drivers and wags to make sure that you are NOT included in their nnn plans)

zhou

shockingly in second place

but only cause he loves you too much, finds nnn a weird tradition (when you explained the basics) and just wants to snuggle with you and sweetcorn in bed

like why make yourself unconfortable and horny when he could just be happy and satisfied (and still horny) with you :D

lando

man is so fired up about the championship battle that he doesn't entertain the notion and just fucks you the minute november starts just to make sure you know not to fuck with him

he only manages to hang onto longer than lewis and zhou cause he was tired and forgot what time it was

carlos

had planned on competing with lando, since they had done it the year before, and the year before that (aka when they were teamates)

but when he found out from you (who found out from lando's partner) that they had already failed, he said to try for a few days

you said you didn't want to

"but it might be good for us" carlos had complained, saying something no one had ever said

and so you just like seduced him like five days later then BAM WHAM, he's back to blowing your back out

not that he needed that much encouragement

pierre

just wanted to fuck you in peace for halloween after you showed up in a very hot outfit

but then charles was like oohhhh we should try this

(f u charles)

but then almost cried in the shower when he realised he couldn't jerk off either

you heard him whimpering, laughed about it and then sucked him off

he tried to hide it, but charles found out anyways

max

is usually too busy to fuck you during race weekends so, he just failed when he like normally fucked you

cause he wanted to fuck you

cause yeah...

so....yeah...

oscar

likes to pretend he's disciplined and has lots of mental restraint

(he doesn't have restraint when it comes to you)

tried to keep some distance, aka by not arriving together at the paddock

but then failed after he saw you with franco, got jealous, said f this shit and then took you in his driver's room

checo

didn't give two flying fucks

only got interested cause evens was talking about it

but throws the challenge out the windoow the minute you insinuate that he seems "weak" about you

kmag

thinks its childish but still wanted to try it

got actually comfortable with it, until you made a sexy joke

hulk

lasts longer cause kmag found it childish

but still wanted to try it too after kmag told him about it

ocon

just wanted to beat gasly

lance

wanted to fuck you

so he complained to his father about the challenge and how you were going give him a reward at the end

so evil stepmum kdrama style, lawerence comes in and tries to give you envelopes of cash to get you to fuck stroll

you gleefully refuse

you manage to negotiate three ashton martins, a ferrari laferrari, and more, before still teasing him

to which he just gives up, and waits for you

george

for those actually dedicated to doing it, he set up the betting pool and "official" rules

(no charles...touching and edging yourself is not "illegal" but you're running the sPIrIt of the challenge)

but like lost out in the second week, when he saw you were having an amazing hair day

said ok i wanna pull on it *with grabby hands* and then gave up

(everyone mocked him relentlessly afterwards)

valterri

super chill about it

tried it only cause you wanted to try it for fun

actually found it hard to be away from you (only cause you love him so much too)

but you managed to reach the third week before simply saying

"that's enough"

franco

had never heard of it

but defs wanted to try after he learnt a about it

got really pissed off by the second week cause you were also teasing him sooooo much

but you kept refusing

basically had to beg his way into convincing you "near" it, and only seeing him get really pouty did you give in

yuki

swears and glares daggers at you the entire three weeks

but he's gotta prove that big things come in small packages

and actually makes it almost to week four before passing out from sheer horniness

fernando

actually lasts longer than most people thought he would

(liam spitefully calls out that he thought nando's blue balls would fall off)

is happy he is technically the best wdc at nnn (even moreso that lewis lost first)

makes it to like the last couple of days

you get bored and tired

so now fernando is bored and tired and just fucks you

alex

certified genz brainrotter

ofc know what it is, and is demandin to win it and prove he's at least NOT a lost in one area (his words not yours)

makes it to the last few days, before you trick into letting you give him a handjob

tries to argue technicalities with george

but by then nov its over and he just gives up

charles

used all his ferrari training in patience to last this long

wanted to tell you to kys when you suggested it

but eventually he got soooo into doing it, he was policing you

however he losses cause he was stupid

you're on his jet

he forgets time zones exist

thought he won

sent a gloating text message to the gc

and [redacted] beats him on the technicality

liam

this man is going all in no regrets, gambling style 😎

even if he didn't propose it, he's definetly the most eager to prove himself (especially to fernando and checo)

he's setting up strict rules to ensure that his dick does not get anywhere near you when sleeping, eating or breathing

(in the last few days he desperately asks you to sleep in the guest bedroom cause he's this close 🤏 to caving in)

however, he resists and gets bragging rights over everyone for the rest of the year.

fail last/succeed

permanent f1 taglist (comment or msg me to join)

@charlesgirl16 @tallrock35 @sweate-r-weathe-r @unlikelystay @alex-wotton

@daisyfreecs @euphorihan @louloucs @oikarma @dying-inside-but-its-classy

@fadingcloudballoon

© the-flanuer || do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platform.

[opiopal]

I could see Dia and Mc dating and it’s just like,

everyone(as in the public ofc) assumes mc is gold digging, why else would they go after lord diavolo? But it can never be proven, since they don’t wear anything expensive, like designer shoes, pants, shirts, or expensive jewelry, and they’re never seen in expensive places like restaurants and stores. And the rumor is dropped surprisingly fast, partly because mc is still wearing the same shoes they showed up in, and mostly bc of interference from the brothers and Barb. And really mc doesn’t want anything at all from Dia except love, they don’t find any interest in big expensive purchases, or ugly expensive designer garbage, or big chunky jewelry worth more then their liver. It’s simply just not for them. meanwhile, Dia is DYING to spoil them, anything that seems to catch their eye he is rushing to buy(and mc is rushing to hold him back), he just wants them to know how much he really cares and he wants mc to be able to rely on him as a lover AND a provider. Basically he’s already in the hubby mindset. he wants to pay for meals, anything mc ever needs at ALL, he’s made it clear on multiple occasions that he WANTS them to ask him for money. Yet they still feel immense guilt for borrowing the equivalent of five dollars.

Eventually, mc probably sits down with him and explains that he doesn’t have to spend any money on them, he should feel any obligation to do so! Which confuses him, and he explains that he knows he doesn’t have to, but he just really wants to! He absolutely knows that mc deserves to be spoiled, and he states it like it’s fact, cause to him it is. but it’s just a never ending back and forth with them, mc doesn’t want to mooch off of dia, they simply just wanna hold his hand and gently kiss his cheek, but Dia wants mc to have the world BECAUSE they hold his hand and gently kiss his cheek. its probably never a serious issue though, since they’re both absolute cuties,

[fatkish]

Would you please write for some of the Pro Heroes in a situation where their s/o (reader) gets out of surgery and is so absolutely zooted that they don't recognize their partner, but flirt aggressively with them. Basically like that video of the guy who wakes up from surgery and starts hitting on his wife and then is thrilled to learn that they're actually married.

Pro Heroes x Reader Headcannons

Drugged Confessions

You had been in surgery and had finally gotten out of it. When you had woken up, you were still under the affects of the anesthesia and were a little loopy. You saw a handsome man/beautiful woman sitting in a chair next to your bed. You knew you couldn’t pass up the chance to ask them out so you tried your best to flirt with them. Here’s how each Pro Heroes interaction goes.

Aizawa:

Reader: hi handsome

Aizawa: hi (y/n)

Reader: *gasp* you know my name?

Aizawa: of course I do

Reader: did you sit on a pile of sugar, cause you’ve got a sweet ass

Aizawa: *chuckles* you’re cute, go back to sleep

Reader: only if you sleep with me

Aizawa: alright *climbs into the bed with you*

All Might:

Toshinori: darling, you’re awake

Reader: hello

Toshinori: hi

Reader: are you butt dialing, cause I swear that ass is calling me

Toshinori: *spits out blood* (y/n)!

Reader: what’s the chance I can get in your pants?

Toshinori: (y/n) please now is not the time for this

Present Mic:

Hizashi: good afternoon darling

Reader: hello handsome

Hizashi: why thank you beautiful

Reader: there’s something wrong with my bed, you’re not in it

Hizashi: well then let’s fix that *crawls in bed with you*

Best Jeanist:

Best Jeanist: you’re awake, how are you feeling?

Reader: I’m good

Best Jeanist: that’s good to hear

Reader: nice shirt, can I talk you out of it?

Best Jeanist: when we get home maybe, but not right now

Reader: then take me home

Hawks:

Reader: are you an angel?

Hawks: no

Reader: I think you might be my angel

Hawks: aww you’re still loopy, I’m so gonna record this *takes out phone and starts recording you*

Reader: do you have any streaming services? Cause I wanna Netflix and chill, Hulu and do you, IMAX and climax, Amazon Prime and nasty time

Hawks: *laughing* oh? Tell me more.

Reader: I’m not a baker, but I’ll stay up late with you to make a cream pie

Hawks: well beautiful, your face is a work of art, we should frame it with my legs

Reader: *blushes* yes

Midnight:

Nemuri: I see you’re awake

Reader: I am now gorgeous

Nemuri: we’ll aren’t you sweet

Reader: I’d like to use your thighs as earmuffs

Nemuri: once you’re better you can

Ryukyu:

Reader: who are you, pretty lady?

Ryukyu: did you forget who I am?

Reader: no… I know that four plus four equals eight, but you plus me equals fate.

Ryukyu: That’s cute sweetie

Reader: nooo… you’re cute

Ryukyu: well I’m already taken, sorry

Reader: noooooo… by who

Ryukyu: by you

[dickgraysonsbitch]

shopping with the batboys ( + bruce )

to my pineapple pizza haters: know you are valid

warnings: none | divider by @cafekitsune | requests open!

With DICK GRAYSON, the most mundane of shopping trips turns into an expedition—leaving your heart rushing and blood pounding. He shoots you a flirty wink before steadying the grip on his shopping cart. “Ready, sweetheart? Because I don’t think you are. I’ve got the bread isle memorized like the back of my—”

“Go!” You exclaim, snorting when you see the shocked expression on his face, like he wasn’t expecting you to cheat to try to beat him. Hey, he was a super-fit vigilante, how else were you going to get a head start against Nightwing? Pushing off of a rack of magazines, you let out a shout of victory as you grab the milk from the fridge. One down, two to go. You quickly place the eggs into your cart, but not before you make eye contact with your menace of a boyfriend, who smirks at you before grabbing the last bag of whole wheat bread. Damn, he really did have the bread isle memorized like the back of his hand, didn’t he?

He bats his eyelashes at you innocently, but not before flashing you a crooked grin. “I think that’s three, sweetheart. 3-2, if you know what I mean, so…” he smiles, but there’s a glint of mirth in his eyes that absolutely melts your heart.

“I’m still calling a foul. It’s your walk-in pantry, and there’s no way that you didn’t have an advantage over me.” You huff, crossing your arms, trying to replicate the cute-but-hurt puppy dog eyes that Dick seemed to have mastered.

He shook his head, chuckling to himself. “Sorry, but a deal’s a deal. I mean, I guess you could go back on it, but…” he looks up at you, with those eyes that could melt even the coldest of hearts, and probably a physical ice statue as well.

“Fine,” you grumble. “We can have pineapple on your stupid pizza. Do you want cereal for dessert?” The last question is supposed to be sarcastic, but the light in his eyes shifts from mischievous to downright carnal.

“Actually, I was thinking of having something else for dessert.”

Oh, boy.

You always knew that JASON TODD was going to spoil you rotten, and that was before you found out that he could cook. It wasn’t fair, actually, that he was probably the most gorgeous, intelligent, and caring person that you knew, all while being kick-ass and super talented at… basically everything. To some, God gave in abundance. Sighing dramatically, you propped yourself on his shoulder and leaned against him with your elbows.

His eyes twinkled at your new position. “What’s wrong, princess? Tacos not your scene anymore?” He was lying, obviously, because you demolished tacos like they were your last meal and you were on death row, but you still huffed and buried your face in his bicep.

“Jus’ thinking ‘bout how fuckin’ perfect you are, Jay,” you mumbled, your voice muffled by the muscle that somehow managed to stay defined under a leather jacket. “You’re really awesome, you know that? I’ve never met someone as amazing as you. They should put a picture of you up at the Met—‘cause you’re a work of art, baby.”

It’s obvious that he’s holding back laughter, from the way that his broad shoulders are shaking, but something inspires him to keep entertaining this though. Probably your endless supply of charm. “Yeah, babe? I knew you wanted me just for my pretty face.” It’s interesting, honestly, how his relationship with you made him more comfortable with… all parts of himself.

You slap his chest, (not that it does anything), a s pout, your brows furrowed. “You’re not funny.” He send you a soft smile, something that should be uncharacteristic for a man of his size, but it works on you, like it usually does.

He presses his lips together before hoisting you up onto an empty display, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear and out of your face. “Well then, it’s a good thing I’m pretty.” Within a minute of staring at your unamused face, he’s howling in laughter, snickering to himself like he’s the comedian of the year.

And without a moment of warning, you’re sealing his lips with a kiss, sending a tingle all the way to the tips of your fingers, and he’s parting his lips to deepen it even further. His hands palm just above your ass, and you gaze at him with half-lidded eyes, softly running your thumb over his rough cheek, and it feels like paradise until—

“Hey! I thought this was a roommates only grocery trip?”

You and Jason both roll your eyes at the voice, and with varying levels of intensity, reply in unison.

“Shut up, Roy!”

Nothing made you shiver like the husky, low voice of BRUCE WAYNE whispering in your ear from behind you. It was an action that sent your poor heart into overdrive, but here, in this shop that was clearly out of your tax bracket (they had mannequins for diamond embellished puppy collars, for God’s sake) it was as if he was doing it just to show that you were at his mercy.

Not a bad place to be, if you thought about it.

“Try on the dress,” his voice is baritone, and he isn’t using his usual, suave business tone. No, this is the voice he uses when he wants something, and when he’s sure that he’s going to get it. It was like a spell was cast on you, and all you wanted to do was exactly what he said. You weren’t sure you really needed a spell for that anyway.

But still, you hesitated. The dress in question was an Oscar de la Renta mermaid cut gown, in pitch black, no doubt matching Bruce’s own personal aesthetic. The only hesitation? The price. You balked instantly when you glanced at the bill for the first time. Shit, you knew that a custom made dress that didn’t even have a tag on it would be more than your yearly rent. “It’s… 15,000 dollars! Bruce, I can’t accept this.”

He frowned, making you notice the soft wrinkles starting to appear on his face. God, that man took way too much stress for his own good. You’d tried warning against it, but when did he ever listen to anyone but himself (and Alfred)?

“Pocket change, darling. And it’s your first gala, I don’t want you to be wearing something you’ve worn before.” He lightly rubs his fingers against your waist, a promise of something else to come once you accept.

“It’s…” you look down. “It’s a lot. Are you sure?”

“Never been surer. Now, why don’t you look at matching jewelry?”

[fabrickind]

I know the joke is that Ghost Trick fans can't tell you why to play it, just that you should, but here's some spoiler-free reasons to play it:

It's an incredible puzzle game. The puzzles are basically Rube-Goldberg machines, where you manipulate objects in a series to effect change in the overall situation. Do you like complex mechanisms and the concept of the butterfly effect? Play this.

The basic gameplay: you are a ghost. You have the ability to posses and manipulate objects, and move from object to object. Someone bas died. You can go to four minutes before their death to change their fate using your Rube Goldberg powers. Also! The puzzles do a great job of ramping you up in difficulty and teaching you the gameplay, but wow do they get HARD in late game. You can replay any puzzle, and also rewind time as you wish. You can't lock yourself out of things by doing it wrong, since you can redo.

The story is SO GOOD. There's a reason why everyone tells you as little as possible -- it's a compelling mystery that sucks you in. The basic idea: you are dead. You need to figure out who you are and who killed you. This spins out into a tale of political intrigue.

It's by Shu Takumi, the creator of Ace Attorney. It has very similar vibes, in that it's absolutely bonkers characters and situations but also WILL make you cry once it's all revealed. Great mix of serious and humorous tones. Seriously, someone dies when a giant roast chicken statue falls on them and the root cause is because of [serious political events]

The aesthetics. Great music, great character design, have you SEEN what the game looks like? Really good use of color and stylization. Character animations are often hilarious.

Missile is there. You WILL love bestest boy. Don't google him. Just trust.

[uluvjay]

Oh Bunny- S. Vettel & J. Button

Sebastian Vettel x younger! Fem reader x Jenson Button

In which the boys have to teach their little bunny another lesson

Warnings?; age gap(reader is in her 20’s), reader is the daughter of a retired driver but no names are specified, unprotected sex(a big no no!), spanking, oral (m receiving), p in v, slight manipulation.., penetrative sex, basically porn without a plot! Sorry for any errors!

Day 2 of my Kinktober special!

A sort of part two to this fic!

“Dad?” You called out as you entered the large kitchen, oblivious to the two men that were stood against the counter due to your face being shoved in your phone.

“Well I don’t know about you mate but that’s not what I’m used to hearing her call us.”

The sound of a thick English accent had your head snapping up, standing at the counter nursing two glasses of whiskey were Jenson and Sebastian.

Suddenly your cheeks were hot and you felt exposed, your tight corset and little skirt not leaving much to the imagination.

The slutty knee high socks with the little bows didn’t help, you didn’t know why you felt so shy in front of the two men, they’d seen it all before.

“W-where’s my dad?” You questioned, cursing in your head at the way it came out shaky.

“In his office, had an important call to take.” Sebastian spoke up this time, his sharp eyes running all along your body.

You groaned inwardly, knowing that if he took a call while two of his closest friends were here then it really was important and he more than likely wouldn’t be returning for a while.

“Will you tell him I left when he comes back?” You asked the two men, sliding on your bunny ears and tucking your phone in your clutch.

“Where are you going?” The Brit asked, his eyes strong as his brows furrowed slightly.

“To a party with my friends from uni.” You replied with a shrug.

Sebastian’s hand that was moving his glass of whiskey to his lips stilled, blue eyes growing dark as he heard your words.

“Dressed like that?”

You felt yourself shrink at his tone, the confidence that filled your body just a few minutes ago completely gone.

“W-what’s wrong with it?” You mumbled, looking yourself over.

“Oh bunny, nothings wrong with it. You look absolutely ravishing.” Jenson chuckled, the evident boner in his pants fully backing his claims.

“It’s just don’t you think it’s a little revealing?” He continued, making his way around the counter to stand over you.

Jenson felt his cock twitch at the way your doe eyes looked up at him, full of innocence and confusion.

“It’s just a costume.” You shrugged, not sure what their point was.

You heard Sebastian scoff from where he stood, his blue eyes rolling as he spoke up, “Yeah, a slutty one.”

Your eyes dropped at his words, fingers playing anxiously with your skirt as you racked your brain for some kind of reply, you were about to open your mouth when a strop hand gripped your jaw.

Feeling your head being moved you now found Sebastian standing beside Jenson, both men towering over you with hunger in their eyes.

“I Think you should take it off honey, nobody needs to see you like that.” Jenson cooed, playing the good cop causing Sebastian to grumble under his breath.

“I guess you’re right..it is a little revealing.” You spoke.

Both men nodded in reply however as you went to move towards the staircase you felt a strong hand grip your wrist and pull you back to them.

“What are you doing? I have to change before my friends get here.” You spoke, eyes switching back and forth between the two men.

“Why don’t we take you? I drive past your university on my way home anyways, save your friends the trip.” Sebastian spoke up, his blue eyes locked on yours.

You agreed reluctantly, missing the smirk the two men shared when your turned your back to them and traveled up the stairs, both of them admiring the way your body looked in that damn costume.

You returned a few minutes later swapping your skirt and corset for a little white dress, the same knee high socks and white shoes on.

“Ready?” Jenson asked seeing you appear in front of them.

You nodded and soon the three of you were spilling out of your fathers large home and into Sebastian’s sleek white Mercedes, thankfully this one had a back seat and you wouldn’t be riding shot gun on Jensons lap again.

The two men talked for the whole ride, not once acknowledging you as they rambled on about life and what was going on in with the current formula one grid.

Seeing bodies and bodies of dressed up people flood sidewalks you realized you were close to your university and with the entrance right in view you perked up.

Moving to unbuckle your seatbelt you felt your heart speed up as the car sped past the entrance, looking back down the road and towards the front seat you spoke up.

“Uh Seb, you missed the entrance..”

“I know.”

You shivered at his deep voice, accent thick as his dark eyes met yours in the mirror.

There was a sinister smirk sitting on his face, drumming his thick fingers against the steering wheel as if everything happening was completely normal.

“What do you mean you know? Seb why didn’t you drop me off?” You asked.

“I mean I did it on purpose bunny, i think you need to be taught a lesson for trying to leave the house dressed how you were. Trying to show off what belongs to us.” He replied, his tone showing no sign of remorse or hesitation.

You opened your mouth to issue a complaint and argue back but the look he shot you in the mirror quickly shut you up. Your heart no longer being the only thing beating as you felt a dull thud begin between your thighs.

The rest of the car ride was silent, the only sound filling the car was the soft sound of the radio and your shares breathing.

Pulling into Sebastian’s large estate he parked the car in the driveway before getting out, hearing your door open you looked up to find Jenson.

You took his extended hand as he helped you out of the car. shutting the door behind you, you went to move past him but the Brit had other plans.

Pushing you against the side of the car he wasted no time before connecting your lips in a hot kiss, you squeaked in surprise but quickly returned his kiss after a second.

His large hands ran along your thighs for a moment before he picked you up and wrapped your legs around his middle, carrying you into the house without disconcerting your lips once.

He dropped you into Sebastian’s lush couch as you made it inside, your body bouncing from the drop.

Both men came to stand in front of you, large bodies towering over your smaller one as they stared down at you.

“What do you reckon we do with her?” Jenson asked.

“Well first, I’m putting her over my knee.” Sebastian smirked back, both men going on to talk about you as if you weren’t even there.

Sebastian moved to sit next to you, patting his lap as a signal for you to climb into his lap-which you did.

Laying across his strong thighs you hated the way the pulse between your legs sped up, your panties soaking wet with arousal.

“Ready bunny?” Seb questioned, flipping up the skirt of your dress, his hands running up and down the back of your thighs.

“Mhm” you nodded.

The first smack was sharp and quick, right on the lower part of your ass.

Jenson kneeled in front of you gripping your chin you turn your head towards him.

“Feeling good baby?” He smirked at the sound of your small moans that we’re breaking through despite your best attempt to stop them.

“You like when he smacks your ass don’t you pretty girl?” He questioned again.

“Yes! Feels good.” You whined.

After ten smacks Sebastian rubbed your ass in an attempt to soothe the marks before he pushed you to stand up on shaky legs.

Both men watched as you stumbled slightly, bumping into Jensons now standing form. The Brit grabbed you steadying your body as Sebastian trapped you between their strong bodies.

You breathing picked up as you watched jensons hands move to the top of your dress, pushing down the strapless material they both admired your bare body.

“Awe, looks like someone made a mess.” Sebastian cooed, eyes locked on the wetness that was smeared between your thighs.

They didn’t like when you dropped your head in embarrassment, Jenson quick to pick your head back up with a grip on your throat.

“Don’t be embarrassed baby, we love seeing how wet you get for us.” He whispered in your ear, dropping his hard facade for a moment as he kissed the side of your head softly.

Butterflies filled your stomach as his hands moved up and down your bare sides, fingers tickling your skin lightly.

“Come on bunny, let us get you into bed and show you who you belong to.” He breathed, eyes locking with Sebastian’s as they shared a smirk.

Sebastian picked you up, carrying you to the bedroom similar to how Jenson had just brought you into the house.

You let your lips move along the skin of his throat, kissing a trail from the column of his throat to his sweet spot just below his ear before nipping it slightly.

You squealed when his hand came down against your ass, a sign to tell you to knock it off.

Making it into the bedroom he dropped you on the bed before keeping his position between your legs, tugging down your cotton panties he tossed them towards Jenson who was sitting against the headboard.

You whimpered as you watched him bring the material to his nose, a deep groan escaping him as he took in your intoxicating scent.

“Smell so fucking good bunny” he grunted, keeping his eyes locked with yours.

You didn’t look away until you felt Sebastian’s fingers between your legs, his fingers running between your dripping folds bringing soft moans from your throat.

You watched as he pulled away, moving back to remove all his clothes he grabbed your ankles and flipped your body, positioning you onto your hands and knees.

You moaned as he ran the tip of his cock through your folds, shared moans filling the room as he slid into your welcoming walls.

He gave you a second to adjust before he picked up his pace, hands gripping your hips as he pulled you back onto his cock to meet his strong thrusts.

“So tight for us bunny, all for us.” He groaned watching the way his cock glistened as it came out of you.

Your eyes were clenched shut as the pleasure flowed through your body, the build up from your earlier spanking pushing you closer and closer to your orgasm.

Feeling a soft hand grip your chin your eyes snapped open, looking up your eyes met with the tip of Jenson’s cock.

Licking your lips at the sight of the precum dripping from the swollen tip you dropped your mouth open without even having to be asked.

The older man smirked, sliding his cock into your warm mouthed groaned loudly at the feeling. Pulling your hair into a makeshift ponytail he thrusted into your mouth.

He loved the way you gagged around him, reminding you to relax your throat he pushed his cock in as far as he could.

You moaned around him, the vibrations flowing through his body he swore he was gonna come right then and there.

They continued to share you Jenson only pulling out when you needed a break to breathe, your moans immediately filling the room as Sebastian hit the sensitive spot deep inside you.

“Im close! Can i please come?”

“Such a good girl bunny, go ahead. Come for us baby.” Sebastian groaned.

Jenson moved to pump his cock as he watched your orgasm rack through your body, your mouth opening in a silent scream, hands gripping Sebastian’s soft sheets in a death grip.

Even in your lusty haze you recognized the sound of Jenson’s hitching breath, knowing he was getting close you did your best to push up your exhausted body to take him back into your mouth.

“Fuck!” He moaned at the feeling of your wet tongue, body shaking as he reached his own climax, his warm cum filling your mouth.

He swore he felt his heart hiccup when you opened your mouth for him, showing him that you’d swallowed it like a good girl knowing that he loved it.

Behind you Sebastian was going crazy at the sight of the two of you mixed with the way your tight cunt hugged him so tight as you came all over him.

The slight ring your orgasm made at the base of his cock driving him wild, he felt himself getting closer and closer.

It wasn’t long before his hips were stuttering and a deep groan mixed with some cursing in German was coming from his throat as he came deep inside you.

The second he let go of your hips you feel flat on the mattress, you spent body sinking into his soft bed.

Both men admired you, the way your and Sebastian’s mixed cum trailed down your thigh, the slutty socks they’d forgotten to take off of you rolled at different lengths, your once perfect hair now tangled and messy.

You must’ve dozed off because the next thing you knew your body was submerged in hot water with a solid chest behind you.

Blinking your eyes open you found Sebastian sat in front of you caressing your leg as Jenson’s hands run up and down your bare stomach.

“Welcome back little one.” Sebastian smiled at the sight of your opening eyes.

“Hi” you smiled back.

“Have a good power nap.” Jenson’s softly chuckled behind you.

“Mhm.” You nodded, turning slightly to curl into his chest.

“How long was I out?”

“Maybe fifteen minutes, we figured you’d come back once we got you in the bath.” Jenson replied.

“You did so good for us tonight bunny.” Sebastian spoke up, the soft look of love in his eyes much different from his lusty gaze earlier.

“Thank you, I’m sorry if I upset you with my costume..” you replied.

“Nobody was upset honey, we loved it honestly. Just no other man needed to see you like that.” Jenson shrugged.

“You’re all ours bunny.” Sebastian smirked moving forward to kiss you lightly before settling back on his side.

You three stayed in there a bit longer before they got you out and ready for bed, they dressed you in a mix of their clothing before tucking you into freshly changed sheets and cuddling on each side of you.

These may have not have been your original plans for the evening, but you truly wouldn’t rather be anywhere else.

-

[luludeluluramblings]

Ooh, love the switched at birth concept..

People who writes this trope usually do the other kid who was switched at birth as a spoiled brat, but I absolutely adore the idea of the oc instead being a platonic sibling yandere! Like their whole life they spent it craving a family that was caring, even if they came from somewhere poor. What's the pint of money if your family doesn't even know what you spend it on?

Now they tracked down their bio family and their fellow switched at birth person. They expect bitterness as they learn of the reader's decent life with a loving family, the home-cooked meals, the family days, the basic school drama, and the joking bickering between everyone there. They logically should feel jealous and spiteful of what they should have had. But every time the reader pops up to go show them like a childhood place or offer their bed so the oc could stay the night in what was meant to be their original home, they physically can't. Because that means the Reader would have been forced into their own neglected childhood. So instead they choose to keep the Reader and Bio family away from Gotham, because it's their little slice of paradise. Screw Damian and all of his "blood heir" sibling opinions, the oc is Reader's sibling. They're basically adopted each other already. The Bat Kids had each other for a majority of their life, it’s only fair that the Oc gets their found family now, right? They already had a chance with the oc, why bother letting them connect with Reader if they couldn't even be kind to the kid they raised?

Switched at Birth Blurb...

I actually haven't seen this trope used, so someone link me to that work cause I wanna read it regardless.

But, exactly this, dear anon. My favorite aspect of the whole thing, is the OC realizing the Bat Family would basically adore Reader with the possibility of the fam not even neglecting Reader from how sweet they are popping into OC's head. Leading OC to spiral into madness and self-doubt further, and cling to Reader even more.

And, the OC using reader as a twisted form of revenge. Letting the Family love and adore them. Introducing Reader to the family and wrap them around their finger before snatching them back and hogging them all for themselves.

Taunting Damian about having the affection of his only blood sibling. Showing off how they're a more attentive sibling than Dick and Tim. Mocking Jason with how unworthy he is to be around Reader. I'd even say they'd go full scorched earth and rub it in Duke, Cass, Steph, and Barbara's faces. (Maybe even Alfred's.)

Like, let OC be a total bitch to the Bat Family and have their revenge, while being completely sweet on Reader and not letting the family get close to them.