#cant work cant survive without working cant get hired anyway

[replicayouth]

and also you're in chronic pain from likely-covid-induced autoimmune disorders and your base line level of mental health is "i want to kill myself but im not supposed to say that so i just pretend im fine."

how is anyone fucking surviving

anyone have any advice for when you spend your entire life suffering and wondering whats wrong with you and why you cant just be normal and then discover you have adhd a very treatable and manageable condition when you have access to medication that helps you but you dont have consistent access to that medication because of the country you live in and the insurance you have so you spend a few months feeling like things are actually getting better for the first time in your life and you start thinking maybe things could change and your life can be what you want it to be but then you can't get your meds filled and then you can't get your meds filled and then you can't get your meds filled and then you end up super mega depressed and unmotivated and dissociated and apathetic but nothing else besides the medication that you can't get has worked. any advice for what you're supposed to do. asking for a friend

[85-rend]

hi it’s me, the person who thinks completely normal thoughts about lethal company. Anyway if you have employee oc’s, what is there role in actual moon looting, and how do they treat eachother in the ship. Also do they have a fave piece of loot and least fave monster?

I have 4 employees, a whole crew, so this might get a bit long :)

Fifty-Six :

"Human" (absolutely not)

Ship captain! has the most experience of the whole crew (they've been here way longer than anyone else. longer than anyone could survive this job)

Maybe a little too happy about the job. takes it very seriously

Prefers to go alone hates taking equipment bc it takes up space they could use for something else

prides itself on efficiency . has everything down to a system

looks scary but they're actually pretty nice and soft (both figuratively and literally)

pretty secretive, mostly lying through omission . doesn't like to talk about themself

doesnt like to be seen without the suit and helmet on. it has to happen eventually but it hates it, raises too many questions. it can try to look more human but its not perfect.

has a tier list in its head of every single piece of scrap for deciding priority of what to take back to the ship. it has a second tier list for if it gets hungry

huge soft spot for cute things. likes rubber ducks and plushies and things like that . will make exceptions in it's efficiency and priorities to take them even if they're low worth

Feels like they need to be doing something with their hands constantly

really likes Zachary, they're very close. doesn't want anything to happen to it... will agree to go together with Zachary despite usually preferring to go alone

likes Elliot, she's alright, she works hard. thinks she's a bit too reckless and hard on herself

alright with Morgan. they don't entirely get along but it's not too bad so it's alright . he notices the weird looks Morgan gives him, no clue what that's about.

Zachary :

Masked picked up from Rend after it tried to hide in a ship and the autopilot left

got "hired" by The Company. it doesn't like this. but it doesn't have a choice

it promises promises PROMISES it won't infect its coworkers. but it wants to so bad. it wants to help them. but it won't.

TERRIFIED of The Company building. absolutely refuses to leave the ship there. Fifty let's this slide, it doesn't mind having to carry some extra scrap to the desk

absolutely refuses to wear the helmets, its uncomfortable and its worried it'll get scratched or something . its fine without it,if that was going to hurt them it would've a long time ago

needs to go with someone in the facilities, becomes very distressed if alone for too long

it'll take equipment if asked, but it often forgets to use things like walkie talkies. it also struggles using it (it has a hard time with the buttons and small things like keys are really hard for it to hold)

hates this job and wants to leave but its scared of what would happen

very touch starved and having no other maskeds around has been effecting it.. (if it does see other maskeds on the moons it'll follow them around instead of its crew)

it wants to be closer with the others, at least El and Morgan are cautious around it. they dont really trust it much

El trusts it more at least, if 56 cant go with it it'll usually goes with her instead (also because Morgan usually stays in the ship but if they do go in still Zachary will more likely go with Elliot)

Morgan doesn't trust it much, they've dealt with maskeds before

Fifty-Six on the other hand, Zachary REALLY likes him. he doesn't mind it being around and hes nice to it

Zachary is like the first of the crew to have seen 56 without his helmet after it found him with it like completely torn apart. it was really worried about him, scared it got hurt. 56 was alright though dont worry

Elliot :

ACTUALLY a human

mostly goes by El instead of Elliot

youngest of the crew, not much experience but good with a shovel

pretty confident going in the facility, will often lead or even go alone. but absolutely CANNOT deal with coil-heads or nutcrackers. all that confidence goes away when they have to

he has automatonophobia and scopophobia. terrible combination to have here if im being honest

helmet is slightly dented after she tried running from a thumper and slammed into a metal pipe (did get away from it, shes still alive obviously . but that did hurt)

his nose was like broken before, never healed the same so its kinda crooked (this was before being at The Company, probably from getting in a fight as a teenager)

he tends to be kind of hard on himself, very apologetic when he makes any sort of mistakes.

his hair feels like shit. its been like bleached to hell so its all brittle and shit

none of the crew have anything against El but they did agree that if anything happens shes dies first (they have not agreed on what "anything happens" or "dies" entails though)

respects 56 a lot, almost exclusively refers to it as 'captain' . nobody else really cares about that, its just El who does that

trusts Zachary more than Morgan does, still cautious because she knows what it can do but believes it that its not going to do that

El and Morgan are rlly cool with each other. she likes to listen to them talk about whatever, they know a lot about stuff and El thinks thats cool

Morgan :

also actually human

mostly does ship duty but does also go in the facility sometimes, pretty good at it.

also takes the job seriously, not as much as 56 though. just wants to be safe, make sure nobody gets killed

they were on a different crew before this one. it didn't end well..

very dry and kind of snippy, they do care though just arent good at showing it

they kinda rlly seem like an asshole but will open up to people sometimes it just takes a while

very interested in xenobiology, got the job to get to observe the moons wildlife more directly. theyre fine with doing the rest of it though

really good at dealing with the creatures because of that

despite not being the fighter of the group they have taken down nutcrackers before, El will not so they deal with that instead.

only one on the ship who actually has first aid training. usually is the one to have to deal with that. only ever seen Elliot and Zachary get hurt though, Fifty-Six is somehow always fine

very suspicious of Fifty-Six, knows something's up with him but doesn't say anything because they don't wanna start shit with whatever kind of alien beast it is

cautious as hell around Zachary, doesn't like to be alone with it. they've seen what maskeds do to people and they don't like it.

but they've never actually interacted with a masked for so long so it's.. an interesting experience at least. there's not much documented about them so this is the most they've gotten to know about maskeds

Elliot and Morgan are chill, Morgan will often talk to her about different things. she's a good listener.

[m0nsterqzzz]

alr ima rant and it's genuinely gonna make me sound crazy.

so when i was 13, my mom told me if i got in one more fight, she'd throw me out on the streets. (she uses that a lot. don't ask) anyway, me being me, i said, "DO IT! I DARE YOU!".

that night, i came up with a plan.

this is my thought process at 13:

pack a big but not to big bag with clothes and other necessities. If i leave at like 2am, I'll be far gone by the time anyone notices.

we lived in a small town, and i knew a lot of people, which meant I knew several highschoolers willing to sell me burner phones for cheap. I will get only important numbers. as much as it hurts, my siblings aren't part of that. destroy my old phone because they easily track that.

we have a Amtrak 25 minutes away. I'll bike there. I'm athletic, so i can get there fast and not be too tired. It doesn't cost extra to take my bike on, so I'll take that with me.

A ticket cost about 50 dollars just to get on the train according to my cousin, and it's possible to get one just to get on and then ride it until i run out of money.

you need verification of identity to get on, so show them your military id. thats government verification. They'll ask questions about your age, but unlike the airport, they allow people over 13 to get on without parents.

so thats that. I'll set aside a certain amount of money, and once I'm out of that, I'll get off the train. Hopefully I'll be a bit away.

im trans (known since i was 11) so i would just go by my boy name (current name) CJ and tell everyone I was a boy. I'd cute my hair, and everyone will know me as CJ. it'll be harder for people in my old life to find me.

Homeless shelters ask for verification and won't give you help if you don't tell them your info or your parents info, so they can't help.

a hotel is the same way, but a motel is a lot less stern.

my druggie aunt used to stay at this trashy cheap one near the freeway, and according to my mom, it was about 35 a night. That's at least a few nights I can stay, and during those times, I'll find work.

Obviously, since I'm young, nobody will hire me, epically without parents around.

So a babysitter, gardener, or pet sitter is the choice. One of those. I have two dogs at home (this was the hardest part of the plan. i didn't wanna leave them, but you cant bring dogs that aren't service animals onto the train and i couldn't even pretend they were) so I'm good with dogs, and I'm just naturally good with kids.

though it's unknow, these actually pay quite a lot. About enough to pay for one night at the motel after every job and food from dollar tree. no need to be fancy.

I may have to spend a few nights on the street, but I will sit in a 24 hour Dennys until they kick me out and then I'll sleep outside it. There is always people in that, so they can probably protect me. If not, I've been taking karate since I was 3. I can defend myself, and truly just pray all goes well.

a few years later, I'll be 16, and it'll be easier to get a better job to afford a better life (probably a little hard because of no school but it's fine). I'll still live in the motel, but at least I won't be surviving off scraps and garbage. At that point, I may have sold my bike for extra money. if not, that's how I'll get around.

then, at 18, I'll have been saving up money for a few years and will probably have enough to splurge on a fancier motel thats less dangerous. By then, people will have hopefully stopped looking for me, and I can live in peace.

Me now:

and did you think about taxes kid?

so in conclusion, I know we all had a time when we walked down the street with a suitcase and stuffed animal and said we were running away. this was mine.

[sonicboomseason3]

Sonic boom season 3 ep where omega uses his experience in law to defend shadow in court. (he was accused of killing fastidious beaver and no one really cares but still. Murder. He also is 100% guilty) Edgebot from the Brude episode is the prosecutor. Omega manages to pin the blame on sonic somehow and then fastidious beaver just. Walks into the court room. Turns out he just got knocked out instead of actually killed(which was the goal). No one knows how they managed an autopsy without actually harming him. The episode ends with T.W. barker asking Omega to defend him in court against charges of extortion. Omega gets paid for none of this btw.

HELP? i already wanted to come up with an episode that was a parody of ace attorney and you just fed me thank u. also you are so based for the multiple references to my other posts no one normal would say this but im so glad i turned on anon on tumblr dot com

anyway lemme add on to this:

its obvious from the get go to the audience that shadows guilty. not because hes a bad liar or anything he just doesnt care to pretend. what does he have to lose? his freedom??? the prison doesnt want him they know better than to attempt to detain him. his reputation??? right, because hes so clearly known for his innocent harmless and gentle demeanor with everyone. hell if he goes down as the one who killed fastidious beaver, people will finally take him seriously again after being forced into so many comedic scenarios for this blasted shows universe. the only thing stopping him from standing up and outright confirming that he did it is that hed never hear the end of it from omega whos high key excited for his debut as a lawyer

tw barker wanted to continue his lawyer career so he practically begged shadow to hire him but like... he does c/rypto on the side and shadows an anticapitalist king so he essentially told him to eff off

the "courtroom" is just meh burger reorganized so half of the tables represent the prosecutors desk and the other half the defenses. the restaurant counter is the judges chair. there may be an actual courthouse they can do this at but after that one time omega left the restaurant he got placed under house arrest or should it be called restaurant arrest? is meh burger technically his home or……… he cant leave or else a self destruct switch will activate is what im trying to say

(hi its me from the future <3 apparently anons idea resonated so hard with me that i got kinda carried away with my little additions and i dont wanna be obnoxious if i can help it so im putting this under a read more okay continue on. or not if you dont wanna hear about how literally the entire trial goes i guess)

knuckles is the judge which makes perfect logical sense

the detective is vector whos televising this entire trial while hes at it. he barely has anything to work with because a CERTAIN SOMEONE disposed of the body but from what he could piece together fastidious beaver was being annoying at meh burger so shadow grabbed him by the scruff, dragged him over the counter, and dunked his head into the deep fryer. as anon mentioned he somehow survives this

sticks conducted the autopsy and by that i mean she whacked fastidious beaver in the head with her boomerang a couple of times and when he didnt wake up from that she hurled him into the sea. once again this makes perfect logical sense its not like we have other characters much better equipped to be scientific about this. and he somehow survives this as well

edgebot looks exactly like omega except with more spikes. he wants revenge against shadow for besting him at Brude™️ which is why hes doing this. from this episode onward hes omegas main rival in the field of law and also theyre brothers since they were both created by eggman. M1KU is their sister. orbot and cubot are their eldest siblings. what a nice family

oh and instead of yelling "OBJECTION" each side just fires a projectile (ice cream for omega, knives for edgebot) at the other robot causing sogginess and scratch marks

all the other characters are the gallery and theyre sitting outside on the grass watching this all go down with varying degrees of attention. eggman in particular feels very conflicted because he wants to support edgebot but he doesnt want to make omega feel like the unfavorite and of course he doesnt want to root for shadows downfall either

witness 1 is dave who was standing right next to shadow when he was committing the deed and did absolutely nothing to stop him. omega gets him to recant by pelting him with ice cream nonstop and giving him hypothermia

witness 2 is amy who was at the front of the line to order when this went down and also saw everything but omega cracks her testimony by getting her to admit that shadows back was towards her at the time so she cant say for sure that was shadow. sure no one else around is a black hedgehog with red stripes but she cant prove it was him can she?

witness 3 whos infinite is mainly there to testify about shadows character and of course he starts talking so much trash about him and painting him in the worst light possible. "also those red things next to his eyes? theyre UGLY." "YOURE THE UGLY ONE YOU MASK WEARING FREAK!!!" shadow yells as he leaps from the defendants chair and tackles infinite to the floor because these two in the boomverse would be so catty you will not change my mind about this. a recess has to be called

rouge whos witness 4 is also there to establish character and shes one of the few who isnt intimidated by shadow so when asked questions about whether hes capable of doing this shes like "lol maybe idk can i go to my manipedi appointment now" (side note but shadows constantly at a loss for words when it comes to rouge precisely because of this. none of his threats ever affect her so if he cant scare her then What Else Can He Do)

eventually omega pushes everything onto sonic by saying he was disguised as shadow to frame him which is an accusation that comes out of left field because in case you werent paying attention sonic isnt involved in this incident/trial AT ALL. he was sitting in the gallery for the first half of the proceedings but grew bored so he left only to be forced to come back when hes accused. insert sa2 references here yada yada faker etc etc youre not even good enough to be my fake blah blah blah live and learn

shadow surprisingly is pretty against the direction this trial has gone because it actually really pisses him off when people imply that he and sonic look alike even when it directly benefits him but just when hes about to put his foot down and own up to the crime (omegas fun be DAMNED) fastidious beaver comes in "correcting" his grammar and everyone freaks out. especially him.

omegas disappointed that his first trial was ultimately a dud but then tw barker comes up to him and tells him hes in trouble for extortion and omega ALMOST accepts until he learns that the incident involved c/ryptocurrency

[tamaharu]

okay i am going to explain my kasumi!lives au to you now if you click on this readmore imagine you are tied to a chair trapped in a room w me as i explain. get into the mood. okay.

so they both survive the accident and sumire is naturally horrified/apologetic and refuses to tell kasumi anything more abt her negative thoughts while kasumi is so rattled + has no mental health awareness that she sort of just lets it slide without much further examination. 

school starts and sumire takes advantage of the privileges given to them as honors students and just. utterly throws herself into practicing, desperate to distract herself from her own horrible thoughts and hopefully get better to negate these thoughts altogether. while kasumi is like okay….. shes practicing harder.. to get used to her growth spurt! yay :D im glad shes doing completely fine!! 

kasumi on the other hand in acting how ‘kasumi’ did in canon, i.e. not taking advantage of practice time so others wont think less of her. despite this, when put to the test she still manages to beat sumire from the combination of regular practice + natural skill. and you can imagine how much that stings for sumire.

meanwhile, kasumi becomes rens confidant! (sorry sumire i love you so but i dont think her being a confidant in this au would work very much) kasumi is his faith confidant and maruki still gets hired after kamoshida like in canon! (sumire goes in to talk to him about her woes.. hes the only one she feels comfortable confessing her dark thoughts to..) kasumi teaches ren gymnastics, and theres probably an element of not letting the other students negative opinions of her (or sumire) drag her down. 

we see kasumi around pretty frequently but sumire is really rare. the only times you are guaranteed to see her are a part of kasumi and marukis social links that have some implications of.. something going on but without the ability to deal with it too directly. she is very quiet/serious abt practice. Kasumi is confused and worried abt sumires behavior, but she seems relatively stable after coming to shujin/seeing maruki so.. its probably fine! (IT IS NOT FINE)

anyway the general plot progresses pretty much like normal. kasumi goes into the myyyysteryyy palace w ren and awakens to cendrillion like normal. you can probably get kasumis confidant to level like six or seven before third sem stuff but at that point it is locked from progressing until the story gets further into gear.

meanwhile the stuff with sumire progresses further and further and. blah blah blah AND. EVENTUALLY: sumire develops a palace. (at this point we are like. in third semester territory calendar wise more or less. idk how theyd discover the palace/how theyd realize there was still mementos BUT ITS FINE.)

the palace is a weird distorted theater or something that encompasses the school where kasumi is idolized and fawned over to um. A Creepy Degree!! Lots of headshots and photos of old performances and actors and stuff and its just endless kasumi w sumires likeness destroyed in various ways.

then you meet the palace ruler/shadow version of sumire thats like im the understudy for the next performance.. i HAVE to live of to kasumis legacy. no matter how hard i try, im never as good as her. and yet, she stays with me, encourages me, clings to me.. saves me, even if it puts herself at risk.. it terrifies me. im only dragging her down, and if i cant bring myself up to her level, then one of these days im going to ruin her life. if i cant be like kasumi-- itd be better if i just died!!

and its like. oh. well thats a lot to unpack. um. theres a gymnastic competition coming up soon. oh okay. i get it now. if she doesnt do better than kasumi in it she is going to like. straight up kill herself.

kasumi is SO CONFUSED like i thought she was getting better??? shes been so chill and relaxed recently??? meanwhile sumire has actually just achieve the eerie calmness of someone who has decided to commit suicide

kasumi: well shes been practicing really hard!! maybe she'll get it this time

ren: (lays a gentle hand on her shoulder) what have we said about mental illness

kasumi: (hangs her head) that it doesnt always work in logical ways

theres some plot reason why they cant do the palace until the last minute idk. so sumire gets the calling card and obviously immediately shows it to maruki and hes like. hm. thats crazy. unrelated i have to go. run some errands.

anyways during the boss fight they are so close to overpowering ruler!sumire and stealing the treasure when all of a sudden tentacles shoot from the ground and grab the treasure and steal it before the pts can. and sumire is screaming in pain and despair, but the tentacles just surround her, preventing the thieves from going and helping her. eventually they just have to leave her there without the treasure because the tentacles are pulling the palace down/the palace is crumbling around them and they dont know why.

then they wake up outside of the palace area. and sumire wakes up and slowly staggers to her feet. and then she straightens. she smiles, pleasant and polite, as she takes her glasses off and puts her hair up. and she greets them like theyre friends. and she looks through kasumi like shes nothing more than glass. and thus, sumire becomes kasumi.

WOOOAHHH SHOCKER MARUKI CHANGED HER COGNITION (plot twist) taking that desire to either become kasumi or die trying very literal. and w her cognition change reality finally and truly shifts.

so marukis palace is pretty different than in canon - more elaborate, more labyrinthine. rather than having to wake up from their fake reality to fight, they already know whats going on and the thieves have to traverse through rooms of paradise, tailor-made for each of them individually, as thats where all the puzzles and stuff are. what if god said that he forgave you, that you could return to the garden?

meanwhile sumire keeps swinging by both to check on their ‘therapy’ progress, but also to encourage them to stay and fighting them if they get real mouthy. the first time they find her they try to tell her whats going on and bring her back with them but instead she… calls on her persona, cendrillion. if shes kasumi, then she is going full kasumi.

anyhow in each of the paradise rooms are pieces of sumires treasure that was split apart and when they reform it the treasure turns out to be. get this. an apple. because they are ALWAYS drinking that damn apple juice !! and as it comes together its like the princes heart from princess tutu where she starts to understand what happened/her own emotions more as more pieces are put together.

the final choice basically is either for the thieves to eat the apple themselves, effectively permanently destroying sumires distorted heart + letting them live in paradise (resulting in more or less the typical maruki end). or, they can give it to sumire for her to eat. THE FRUIT OF KNOWLEDGE!!!!!!!!!!! WHO IS THE SNAKE!!!!!!!!!!

when sumire eats the apple it formally gives her back ALL her context/memory and she is Upset. and it triggers the maruki fight more or less. and she joins in to help because shes pissed!!! except, the only problem is.. the longer the fight goes on, the less and less effective her persona becomes. because its cendrillion. because its not hers, not her true self.

but in the end her final thing is (reminiscent of the “shooting god in the face” thing/sort of what they do to him in canon) to take a giant sword from the fading cendrillion and bring it straight through the maruki/persona fusion’s heart. (you can even still have the section with ren and maruki punching each other in the face while the palace disintegrates after that!)

and after that, things come back to normal. sumire is…. not better. not by a longshot. but for the first time in a really long while, shes ready to trust her sister, and she ready to trust herself: sumire yoshizawa.

even in a version of the story where both kasumi and sumire survived the car accident i still believe sumire would have the capacity to be fucking insane ❤️ love and light

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s stepkid

Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader

warnings: alcohol mention

a/n: i rushed these so bad i just wanted to post dhhshsnsna

prompt: y/n is pepper’s kiddo!

it was just you and your mom for a long time

pepper and y/n potts

she couldn’t keep up with you sometimes, too busy dealing with the manchild that was mister anthony edward stark

speaking of—

“uh, who’s this?” -tony, pointing at you

“mr. stark, i am so sorry, the school closed because some kid set fire to the science lab and i didn’t have time to find a sitter—”

“no, it’s fine, no need to apologize. hey, kid, you wanna sit in the boss’s chair? i’ll let you run the company for the day!” *cue you nodding* “sweet, would you mind that, ms. potts?”

“oh? no, not at all” *mouthing* “thank you”

“so, uh, what’s your name? no, don’t tell me: ketchup.”

*giggling* “y/n”

“no way! that was my second guess!”

tony wasn’t used to being around kids

he had no idea that he was actually kind of good around them

despite a few minor hiccups

“you sit in my chair and im gonna spin you around, sound like fun?”

he spun you around WAY too fast and you were diiiiizzy, also you fell off the chair

“don’t tell your mom that we did that. she may be my assistant, but she scares the shit out of me. also, don’t say ‘shit’”

dude he just thought you were a cool kid!!!

“hey, you know, ms. potts, you dont really need to hire a babysitter anymore. y/n’s doing just fine hanging out here”

“how am i not surprised you befriended an actual child?”

she still took him up on his offer, you seemed pretty happy

when your mom worked late, you passed out in tonys office

tony and you had your own little secrets (like falling off the spinning chair), tony showed you around stark tower, and you practically lived there

“i got you a happy meal from mcdonalds!” -tony every day after your school

in all honesty, you weren’t the “popular” kid at school...not even close

but tony made up for it

“y/n! i found this old racecar toy in a box of old stuff, you wanna hold onto it for me?”

you kind of grew up in stark tower tbh? it was pretty cool

and as you grew up, you started to notice more

“mr. tony, do you have a crush on my mom?”

“do i what? no, no, i do—who the hell am i kidding? you caught me”

“called it!”

after that you did everything to try and get them together

when your mom was talking to tony, you would stand behind her and wiggle your eyebrows and just taunt tony endlessly

no! tony cannot remember your mom’s birthday for the life of him! you are his calendar now

“dude, why dont you just ask JARVIS to remind you?”

“i may be a genius, but that doesn’t mean i have common sense”

“wise words, sir” -JARVIS

when tony disappeared for 3 months you were so sad???? like you were not okay at all

no

and when he came back, he literally exited the plane saying “WHERE’S ‘T-POTT??’”

(your wonderful nickname. ‘t’ for ‘tony jr.’ and ‘pott’ for ‘potts’)

“my mom missed you”

“oh, i bet she did”

“you turned my child into you, tony. i will never forgive you for this”

“well, at least y/n was here to fill in for me, huh?”

tony wanted to show you the arc reactor but he was actually afraid of scarring you lmfaoooo

but he did let you in on the iron man secret (he knew you wouldn’t snitch)

and just to make sure:

“if you dont tell anyone, i’ll buy you a car when you turn 16”

“man, that’s like, forever away”

“good, maybe you’ll forget by then”

ur mom kinda maybe sorta found out abt iron man :/ she told you that tony was a bad influence

“mom! no, tony’s cool! he’s like a superhero”

“no, sweetie, he’s a rich guy with issues. we’re leaving”

that didn’t last long

not long at all

and soon they FINALLY got together

“jeez, i thought you two would never stop pining after each other”

“couldnt have done it without my wingman” -tony *fistbump*

“as thanks can i have my own iron man suit?”

“yes.” *pepper glaring at him* “no.”

sooner or later your mom and you moved into tony’s house and you got a really big room!!!!

it was completely decked out

king sized bed, flatscreen tv, mini-fridge, microwave, computer, your own bathroom with a smaller tv, a poster of tony??? (you vandalized it and put it in his workshop), and more!!!

okay you were spoiled

“do you like it here? are you sure i made the right choice?” -pepper

“are you kidding, mom? this is awesome! plus, you’re happy, i’m happy, tony’s happy, i think JARVIS is even happy!”

“i am, mx. potts. simply ecstatic” -JARVIS

pepper was really happy!! it was a pretty cool family

you started giving your school tony’s number if you ever got in trouble, you knew he’d cover for you

“mr. potts, is it?”

“sure”

“your child, y/n, punched another student in the face today. we’re very disappointed in their behavior”

“why’d they punch the kid?”

“well, the other student punched y/n first”

“HAH! thank you for wasting my time. send y/n back to class and call me back if something important comes up”

he literally gave you a high five when you got home

“i gave him a black eye!”

“i couldn’t be more proud. i mean, i dont condone violence, but self defense is a whole other story”

a little help in the workshop, tony asks you to hold the flashlight

“why don’t you get one of your robots to hold this for you?”

“are you kidding me, you’re complaining? we’re having stepdad/stepkid bonding time! and dum-e can’t do anything right, i dont trust him”

youve had a few theme park trips as a family ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

also tony has 100% told you to wait in the car and then left you alone for 2+ hours

“i’m not like a regular dad, im a step-dad. want some beer? you can have a little sip. i’d rather you do it in the house”

your mother actually does love how he actually cares about you!

“y/n is 12% my responsibility” -tony

“tony, you are impossible” -pepper

no avengering for you! pepper said no!!!!!!

disappointed but not surprised

iron man 3: y/n potts is put through the wringer

Text Message to Mr. Tony: bro you better come get your girl, me and happy are watching this other guy flirting with her. he’s showing her pics of his ‘big brain’

Mr. Tony: HE WHAT

Text Message to Mr. Tony: Tony he looks creepy i don’t want him to be my new stepdad do something!!!

anyways ur house kinda blew up and ur mom and you kinda got kidnapped and u were right abt that guy being creepy and thankfully no experiments were done on you but like your mom kinda almost died and her and tony were fine!!! all good in the end

you met mr. col. james rhodes that day

“aw, you’re the kid ive heard so much about” -rhodey

“you mean the coolest kid in the world?check.”

“you cant tell me you aren’t tony’s biological child, good god”

you got to meet the avengers later on too! (you’d already met natasha tho, only briefly)

“i know it can be a little overwhelming, right? meeting all these heros, legends even—” -rhodey

“oh, my god, is that thor? thor!!” -you, leaving rhodey in the dust

literally why does pepper trust you around tony something always goes wrong there were literally robots attacking, you were only at avengers tower bc your mom was busy with the company and she thought you’d be safe with the avengers. the AVENGERS.

“please dont tell your mom that i created a bad robot that tried to kill us. the robot will be the least of our problems” -tony

he made happy pick you up and you had to miss out on FUN and it sucked a lot

“it’s okay, y/n! i’m fun, too!” -happy

then your mom and tony took a break and your life got mega-boring for a while, but they weren’t separated for that long. you try not to think about it. it was brutal

Mr. Tony: Does she miss me?

New Message to Mr. Tony: I think so. Either that or she’s crying and drinking wine in the dark for no reason.

Mr. Tony: Damn it, now I feel bad. I miss her a lot. Oh, also, the Avengers say ‘hi,’ I’m in Germany with some bad news, I’ll explain later if you don’t see it on TV first, and I found you the perfect friend! His name is Peter and I think you’d like the school he goes to, it’s in Midtown. Smart kid school.

New Message to Mr. Tony: I’ll look into it, thanks. Also, I don’t like how those all connect. Please update me asap

watching the news to see several avengers arrested, cap on the run, and more!

“maybe it was good i didn’t fall in with the avengers”

tony and pepper finally got back together and you actually transferred to midtown high! peter and his friend group accepted you quickly, it was great. you and flash unfortunately had the most in common

you’d literally text happy right next to peter and he’d immediately reply to you. it hurt peter’s feelings

Momma: Sweetie! I’m working in the office late, leftovers are in the fridge, hope you have a wonderful day at school! 💕

👉👈the vulture tried to kill you for being tony’s stepkid, tony made peter promise to protect you

“y/n, you gotta stay out of harm’s way. mr. stark gave me an actual mission and it’s terrifying, i have to make sure you stay safe”

legit why the fuck was this old man tryna kill you bro grow up

anyyyywayssss your mom and tony got engaged!!

“wow, i thought the day would never come!!” -you

ppl told you tony isnt your stepdad bc ur mom and him werent married but who tf asked

why is the earth always in fucking danger

you and peter were just vibing on the field trip bus and all the sudden: space donut

“go! i’ll cover for you...FRIDAY, call tony”

“...hi there, little one”

“what the fuck”

“oh, so you see the aliens, too? well, at least im not crazy”

tony stark has left the atmosphere

you and your mom were kinda......not chillin tho

she and you didn’t sleep for a few nights, then ppl just straight up disappeared

plot twist: you survived the snap and your family was lucky to be alive, you even got a little sister who became a big handful!

only bad thing was all your friends dusted and you were pretty lonely

but watching morgan grow up kept you busy

“ahhh, shes so big!”

happy times in bad times

bad times!!!!! bc after five years thanos came back as thanos from like ten years ago. outdated thanos. obsolete thanos.

but you made your first and only appearance in the suit tony actually designed for you many years ago

you should have just stayed home tho bc that fight didnt pass the vibe check

“please dont tell me he...no, no, no, no, no”

you and your mom latched onto each other in tears, tony was one of the best people in your life, he made you and your mom two of the happiest people on earth

best stepdad a kid could ever ask for

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight //

[kanohivolitakk]

Have you done Krekka for the ask game? I know you're a huge Nidhiki fan, curious if you have any thoughts on his partner?

I haven't gotten Krekka yet actually. So far I only done Toa Ignika and Axonn for the Bionicle ask game (which Im still accepting). That being said great choice. Krekka isn't necessarily a big favorite of mine (partially because I'm not that fond of the "dumb brute" archetype barring a few exceptions), but I have to admit I do have a soft spot for the big guy. Krekka is a relatively simple character when it comes to characterization/backstory/role in the story (especially when compared to Nidhiki), but that doesn't mean I don't have any "deeper" thoughts regarding him or that there isnt stuff worth discussing.

Anyways some thoughts/headcanons/general musings:

This is a weird thing to start with but... Krekka is kinda adorable for me. I think its kinda this ...overgrown puppy (bulldog??) vibe due to his loyalty and dumbness. I admit BOADH is a big reason for me feeling this way since it gave him a few moments that made me go "AWWW he's so cute". Just..love his loyalty so much.

His undying loyalty makes him stand out for me across the other dark hunters. While many dark hunters we ha e are opportunistic and schemy, Krekka is just...very loyal. Maybe too much so. But I love that he is loyal. Feels refreshing tbh.

And now I cant help but feel that TSO is just "guys stupid but at least he wont double cross me and is easy to keep in check" when it comes to him.

Not to go woobifying villains but I genuinely dont think the guys that bad. Hes just really stupid, overly loyal and doing his job. Its kinda like w Lariska being a decent person despite being a knife happy murder girl although to a much lesser extent since guys a literalminded fool and also just smashy boy.

I do like his backstory of being a former guard who lost his job and started wreck havoc until one day a dark hunter found and hired him. It isnt anything too complex but it works well for his character and explains why he is so loyal to Dark Hunters. It also helps bringing a bit more light to his homeland and I love when we get more info of places through character backstories, makes the world feel more real that way.

Also can Gorast please stop hurting charaxters I like. This is the reason shes my least favorite character in the 2001-2008 storyline that isnt just a glorified extra or a plot device.

When it comes to Krekka, one scene I always think of when I think of him is in BOADH where he temporarily forgot to fly and Nidhiki was just "WAIT A MOMENT LARISKA TOLD ME YOU CAN FLY????" and Krekka just goes "whoops I forgot". That was adorable honestly. You dumb idiot, forgot you could fly.

Also, I know he's kinda "the idiot character", and while I am NOT saying he isn't, I do think its worth pointing out that he's basically literal minded. In BOADH (again) when Nidhiki tried to do that training scenario Krekka basically was like "wait I’m here, there’s nothing there why should I move there". This is

Another thing I really like about Krekka is that how, despite being an absolute idiot and tool, he still is willing to sometimes not take Nidhikis bullshit, see preventing him from getting the Zamor launchers (geez BOADH did a lot for this guys characterization lmao)

I sometimes call him truck boy because his name is one letter off my languages word for truck.

Also unless canon/word of Greg says otherwise I don't think every member of his species is as stupid as him. Like possibly on similar level but still.

It is made pretty clear that Nidhiki couldn't stand Krekka at all, but I do genuinely wonder how Krekka feels about Nidhiki. Based on the little we have I'd say he liked him to some extent or at the very least, didn't hate him to the same degree. I also have to wonder how aware he was about Nidhikis haterd towards him.

I also love the idea that when Nidhiki was mutated, Krekka just...wasnt afraid of him at slightest, no fear in this dumb boy. (I also like the idea he didnt recognize him at first and Nidhiki just, had to explain to his thick skull who he was. It took a while but eventually he got it.)

On a related note, I find it interesting how the LOMN website describes him working with Nidhiki because guy knows where to get the good jobs or something rather than being his goverment (read TSO) assigned partner The way the twos relationship were described makes it feel that by this point the staff hadnt figured out what they wanted to do with Dark Hunters , or if it even was an organization or just these two tools.

Its really interesting for me how Krekkas characterization not only varies between the books/comics (where hes more intimidating and him being a simpleton isnt as pronounced) and the movie (where hes more of a dumbass) but also how his characterization evolved. Like, his loyalty wasn't that pronounced trait but now I feel its just as important part of him as him being a dumbass (which is to say, very interesting)

I remember how the aftoermentoined Metru Nui movie website described that Krekka hated toa to the point wouldve hunted them for free if Nidhiki didnt make sure the two would get paid. I feel this is somewhat early installment weirdness as it isnt mentioned anywhere else but at the same time Krekka being willing to fight without payment sounds 1000% in character if you ask me

Something I have been confused over: when exactly was Krekka recruited to the dark hunters??? The timeline is very vague about this and I wish we knew.

It's been AGES since I watched my home countrys dub of LOMN but what I recall I really liked Krekka's voice in that dub. He sounded more badass and I loved it, the VA had a pretty unique sound. Sadly dont think there is any clips of the LOMN dub, which is a shame. UPDATE: I rewatched the dub and I love the voice itself but felt the voice direction made him sound kinda inconsistent

This is more a "Nidhiki and Krekka related thought" rather than just Krekka related but one thing I really like about Krekka and Nidhiki is that how they are like a more serious and competent take of "those two evil henchmen with contrasting personalities" trope. Often these types of villains are rather goofy, but these two could be rather dangerous as well and I really like that. I also like their dynamic of just doing Nidhiki being done with Krekkas bullshit. One of the main reasons I wish LOMN was a miniseries rather than a movie is because I really wanted more screentime with the two.

On a related note can I JUST SAY I LOVE the way the two compliment/pararell each other. From design (Krekka being bulky mostly blue colored, Nidhiki being slender and monstrous, mostly green colored) to personality (Krekka being foolish and simpleminded but loyal Nidhiki being cunning and ambitious but treacherous) to powersets (Krekka being strong physical attacker, Nidhiki being weaker(??) but faster and more special attacker).Heck, even their backstories have similarities as they both lost their orginal purpose in one way or another and didnt have anywhere to go but Dark Hunters (the main difference being that Nidhiki inflicted his fate upon himself by betraying the toa while Krekka didnt really do anything iirc)

Now for something crossovery, Krekkas and Nidhikis dynamic reminds me a lot of Kronk and Yzma from Emperors New Groove. Yes I have drawn a parody of the "pull the lever kronk" meme, yes I intend to make more screencap redraws. They also remind me a lot of Mummymon and Archenemon from Digimon 02, partially due to the dynamic (smug spider that tries to be cunning and intimidating but gets outclassed by most other villains in that + loyal blue dumb boy) partially due to their ultimate fate being rather similar.

I don't know how familiar you are with the franchise, but Krekka reminds me a fair bit of Gamel, one of the four villain generals in Kamen Rider OOOs, mainly because "the dumb brute major villain that's kinda cuteish and loyal a f while everyone else is an asshole".

I remember reading a p good oneshot fic that was just him accidentally killing a civilian when all he wanted was a hug and...honestly that is p much what I imagine him being like. Guy may be strong, reckless and a fool but like I said I dont think hes all that bad and just a puppy. An overgrown, moronic puppy but a puppy nontheless

For AUs, I remember I have thought once of "What if Krekka survived but Nidhiki died" and just ...guy wouldve been very lost and confused and unsure what to do tbh. He would most likely returned to Dark Hunters but Mata Nui knows how say TSO wouldve felt about that. Its not too complex au yet but I am thinking of developing it further one day.

Thank you for asking.

Sorry this took longer than expected. I had too many thoughts and half of them were deleted so. I hope its worth the wait tho. I do have a lot of Krekka thoughts and tbh wasnt sure if I was even able to get them all here.

(I am still doing the ask game so if anyone wants to send me a bonkle I will try to give thoughts, meta and headcanons on them)

[frncs]

⌠ ERIC OSBORNE, 21, NON-BINARY, HE/THEY ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, FRANCES ‘FRANK’ LAVOIE! according to their records, they’re a FIRST year, specializing in MACGYVER SURVIVAL SKILLS AND NAVIGATION & COVERT OPS; and they DID go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of oversized clothing stitched with thick yarn and littered with cat hair, the snap of stretched balloons before they’re blown and a post-nap dazed gaze. when it’s the (virgo)’s birthday on 09/01/1999, they always request CORN DOGS from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. ⌿ tasha, 22, she/her, est ⍀ 

well well well .. id meant to bring another kid ages ago .. n then jus didn’t because the personality part was/is givin me grief FGJH so pls 🐻  w me n replies as i figure out his voice . also .. haven’t even written out my intro yet . . bt ik it’s gna be long apologies , pls feel free to just read the tldr 

tw: death, accidental murder, grief.

TLDR: grew up fairly well off to spy parents who didn’t want him to be part of that world but apart from that didn’t care what he did with his life otherwise. he often questioned whether they really cared for him at all (tht quote thts like .. if u love me u love me in a way i cant understand). luna’s his best friend, and he’s obsessed with his aunt and uncle’s circus that stops into town every year. life is pretty great until luna ‘dies’ at 16. he joins the circus and becomes a clown, he loves performing with all his heart. at 18, his aunt and uncle arm him with a credit card and tell him to go travel, he assumes it’s because they just want him to explore the world. visits europe for six months and asia for six months, enjoys it but misses the circus terribly, busks a lot. they actually send him away to distance him from the shady happenings that are starting to boil within the company. he comes back in time for the halloween switch-a-roo, where everyone rotates their act (so he does the magic show as a clown). he’s part of a set-up that results in him accidentally killing a person and sawing them in half. his aunt and uncle call his parents, who reluctantly send him to prep school for a little less than a year to heighten his chances of getting into a spy school for protection, which he does. dedicated to working hard and getting a high paying job to pay for reparations for the circus and do a massive overhaul of the way it runs, because it’s like his second home.

grew up in waterford ct, to one retired spy parent ( his mom ) and his dad who works with the government and is aware of espionage. his mom straight up didn’t have a good time, no one really talks about it, he has no idea what happened, doesn’t know if his dad knows either but it’s clear that they don’t want him going into the spy world. 

he feels like he’s always been treated like an adult for as long as he remembers, not in the sense that they burdened him with responsibility, but that they didn’t seem to care what he did one way or another. the best way i can describe it is that his parents had the same energy as a character in a yorgos lanthimos film, very dry and lifeless, like they’re on autopilot. he’d try and cuddle his mom and she’d just pat him on the head. he couldn’t really rebel against them and as long as he went to school and got good grades they appeared un-phased about what he got up to, a very mind your own business dynamic shared between family. 

he didn’t get up to a whole lot, he was a bit of an outsider. didn’t make friends very easily because he didn’t know how to let himself go around people, even though he’d sometimes be excited but wouldn’t know how to show it. definitely had that reserved temperament ingrained into him from his parents. 

he did have one friend who knew him inside and out, luna <3 who was also his neighbour. their demeanours were a perfect match but also he’d find himself getting so excited and wanting to tell her about his day or listen to hers, or read with her or play hopscotch or send her secret notes with his flashlight at her window. 

there was one other thing that got him terribly excited and it’s when his aunt and uncle’s traveling circus would stop in. he’d go every single day for the week and a half it was there. his parents would arrange one dinner with them and consider their familial duty done, other than that they remain out of contact with them. his aunt and uncle tell him that he’s always welcome to join, and he holds them to it. his parents say do whatever you want, just graduate high school first. 

his whole world kinda crumbles when luna ‘dies’ at sixteen. he feels immense guilt over it thinking he should’ve done something about that skeevy bf of hers...this also coincides with one of his mom’s friends dying (harlowe’s mom) which makes his mom act even weirder so he fast tracks his plans to join the circus and joins at sixteen, doesn’t graduate high school. i envision the convo btw him and his dad went like: 

“dad, i’m joining the circus.”

“graduate high school first.”

“no.”

“okay son, i can’t control you.”

the company welcomed him with open arms and he tried out everything, acrobatics, sharpshooting, but wasn’t particularly talented at anything. except, clownery. because messing up is commended, noting how all the kids would laugh at him trying basic magic tricks. so his aunt and uncle got him into a clown costume lickety-split. performing brought him a lot of joy through the grief like he’s an entirely different person when performing, insert that one cursed joker picture: put on a happy face. 

because the owners were his aunt and uncle he was treated exceptionally well and he was very oblivious to the malpractice that went on behind the scenes. the circus had a whole sector dedicated to pickpocketing (other kids who he just saw as friends were often runaways from broken homes who didn’t have anywhere else to go and earned their wages by stealing from customers), and serious kerfuffle with pay, probably some extortion going on, just general yuckery. he vaguely knew it was happening but was kind of like it is what it is kinda standpoint. heavily inspired by the circus barney and clint barton grew up in reffed in the 2015 run of all-new hawkeye.

a couple years later his aunt and uncle give him a credit card and tell him to go travel for a bit. he does because why not but misses the circus terribly. he spends six months in europe and six months in asia, busks as a clown a lot and but his on-the-road/home sickness never really fades.

he returns super excited, ready to clown around but it’s evident tensions are just really high between the workers but they’re still all super sweet to him because he’s very sweet even if he’s oblivious. halloween comes around which is his favourite time of year because they do this thing called the switch-a-roo, where everyone switches what act they’re doing, bicycle acts do contortionist acts, lion tamers do rope walkers, magicians do animal taming and clowns do magic acts. it’s just one big laugh because obviously most of them are cross-trained, but it’s meant to be more of a comedy thing and their mess-ups are to an extent choreographed but also capitalizes on the scariness because they hype up the fact that they have no idea what they’re doing.

he’s doing his magic act, messing up all the magic tricks showing all his cards, and his last act is the sawing someone in half, so the assistant comes out in the box, really selling it like omg a clown !!! being like stop !!! you don’t know what you’re doing !!! and frances is like playing along with the act, as he was told that the gag would be when they split the boxes they’ll have some practical effects to make it look like he’d accidentally actually cut the assistant in half. fumbling with a very real chainsaw, he does the choppity-chop which takes a bit more muscle than he thought it would and the assistant screams a lot then pretends to pass out. anyways it wasn’t an act he accidentally cut someone in half, and they die.

EXTRA CLOWN LORE THAT’S NOT IMPORTANT FEEL FREE TO SKIP!

i envisioned that worker negotiations had been going on for a while and had kinda reached a stalemate where nothing was happening, and there were rumblings about frances being off travelling and spending a shit ton of money where it could’ve been put towards the workers and the circus and his aunt and uncle would hear threats thrown towards frances which is why they wanted him to stay away/go travelling for a while. the girl who was killed did so knowingly, and died a martyr (and also left frances a note explaining things and how she was sorry that he was the one that had to kill her). the whole thing was executed with a lot of thought: how it would affect frances and how it would be seen as a personal attack against his aunt and uncle - and that while the act seemingly went off without a hitch and the public didn’t suspect a thing, the workers have leverage to make it public (which ideally they don’t want b/c a lot of the workers are pretty disenfranchised or have criminal records and truthfully don’t want the end all being the circus closing b/c they do love their job just not the conditions). his aunt an uncle are in a bit of a jam because they need an investor but can’t get that because of shady hiring practices in the first place, and their greed definitely exacerbated the problem.

after that happens his aunt and uncle immediately call his parents, who despite never wanting him to go into the spy industry believe that it would be the safest option for him, and enrol him in prep school (which he attends for less than a year) so that he has more of a chance getting into gallagher the following year, which, with the right strings pulled happens. 

now he’s dedicated to giving it his all so he can get a really high paying job and do a complete overhaul of the company and make a lot of reparations that should’ve been made years and years ago. 

personality

- very patient, a slow talker and more of a listener.  - idealistic, in the sense that he’s always been surrounded by people either in poverty of vulnerable, and despite being a caring guy, adopted that kind of mind your own business mentality his parents had. even his desire to get rich in order to save the circus is a very unrealistic plan or at the very least would take a very long time to achieve.  - tired, i know it’s not a personality trait but i’m making it one, he’s a little bit dazed, not gloomy per se but like he’s woken up from a nap and needs to warm up a bit before being a functioning part of society. but that’s like all his interactions. has the gait of like a drunken kung fu master, very limber.  

headcanons

has slight imposter syndrome about clowning, knows he’s great and always got a standing ovation but can’t help but wonder how much nepotism played a role in her being the main clown in the company.

planning on hiding out in her room during halloween, but is very bittersweet about it, because he thinks that halloween is one of the only times that people are happy because they get to be anyone they want and has found that most people don’t want to be themselves.

has an overweight, old cat which he’s had since he joined the circus and has been everywhere with him. it’s name is cat. he also has an album on his phone of all the strays he’s ever met, which is a lot being on the road. he named all of them but they never got to come with him.

sleeps a lot, probably has some sort of chronic sleep disorder, but enjoys the sweet release from life so he doesn’t question it. has no shame and will sleep anywhere and does.

loves making balloon animals, was his favourite thing to do at the circus. keeps a jewelry dish full of unpumped balloons on his bedside table. also a big reader, and hoarder of anything that can fit in a small travel notebook (leaves, ticket stubs, pictures, anything). 

wanted connections: i’ll update my actual google docs in the coming days but people he met while traveling for a year, anyone with pets wanting to have a pet playdate (cat’s not too active but he could use some company), someone who catches him crying (he cries a lot haven’t peeped his full chart but i can sense the water energy from miles away), people who wake him up when he falls asleep in class, in the common rooms, outside, flirty flirts, someone who’s been to the circus, someone who clowns him about being a clown and he gets super angry, really anything, i’m terrible at coming up with connections i get such a thrill from mundane relations i’m boring <3

[blookmallow]

skyrim misadventures, ft Weird Magic Stuff, a determined spite mission, and some spooky encounters

-----

still absolutely love this guy 

[me, the leader of the brotherhood, who just assassinated the fucking emperor a few weeks ago] oh we’re not, huh

sighs i really want to do the thieves guild storyline but i dont want to work with the slimeball scam elixir guy to run a decent dude out of business for no reason... i like brand-shei hes my friend :( 

i might not go through with it on this file, i definitely will with my khajiit though if nothing else 

i know having a khajiit thief character is way obvious lmao but 

nice 

NICE

i forget which quest this was but I FOUND A SKELETON DRAGON????? IVE NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE

holy SHIT thats so many skeletons

i got SO many skulls in here 

i also found this spooky hand, but couldnt figure out anything to do with it yet, unless its just here for Ominous Mage Experiments Gone Wrong purposes 

anyway all this was on a quest to find the augur, which nobody wanted to talk about and kept going “ohh yeah.... he Used To Be a student.... until..... The Accident” and i was losing my MIND trying to imagine what kind of horrific thing this guy got turned into but then i finally found him and 

:/ hes just a big glowy ball

which, i mean, is cool and all, but i was hoping for like, a dude who turned himself inside out or became some eldritch horror or something 

through all these winterhold quests i started finally getting half decent at magic (not like, Good, but acceptably ok) and decided to finally go back for that one disastrous cidnha mine quest ive been avoiding 

you get thrown in the markarth prison mines with nothing and gotta find a way to escape, which can be accomplished without too much trouble if you band together with your fellow inmates, however, they are fucking forsworn and will start murdering everyone near them once they escape with you

 i dont know if that keeps you stuck with a bounty in markarth or not, but i REALLY didnt want to release the forsworn leader out into the world, or be friends with those fuckers, or ruin my reputation, or risk civilian casualties even though theres not really that many people i care particularly about in markarth now that muiri is safe is solitude, so. i had previously just reloaded a save and ignored the quest for ages

because like. i dont think you Can get out on your own and if you try to turn on them and fight once you make your escape its REALLY hard to survive bc they outnumber you and you dont have any armor or anything other than like, shitty prison shivs 

however: the guards cannot take away your magic or your shouts, so

this time i was fucking ready, i have the ability to summon a FRIEND now to fight with me (i dont know what would’ve happened if i had a companion with me during this mess but like. i can Make one), i learned how to make a magic sword so id at least have some kind of halfway decent weapon, and ive got healing magic 

cool dragon powers also help (this was from. later on bc i have my stuff in this shot but)

this was still hard as shit, lucien got defeated pretty early on, and with no magicka potions its really hard to keep healing while fighting but i eventually fucking DID IT, i killed every single forsworn prisoner including madanach, and escaped myself (which granted me a pardon and some kind of special ring i dont care about from the silverbloods) 

i mentioned this misadventure to my dad later and he legitimately didnt know it was even possible to do this lmao i was VERY determined not to help the forsworn ever in any way

those guys ruin my day every five minutes when im out anywhere near their camps even if i try to avoid them like the plague i hate them!! 

i kept the shivs though and later discovered 

you can enchant them

LOOK at this cavern!!!!!!!

also i ran into a fucking headless horseman ??????

i didnt even know he was there until i heard lucien unsheathing his weapon when he saw it behind me and i looked to see what he was concerned about 

i followed him for ages like halfway across the map but eventually i had so many bandits and wolves and also a dragon chasing after me i lost sight of him after a while :’| WILD though

not that im ever going to sell it but i cant help noticing the blade of woe is worth 666 gold, 

cicero’s always mentioning he wants skyforge steel so i bought him a skyforge dagger and enchanted it for him (i think i put silent moons enchantment on it, i forget), finally remembered to give it to him but didnt take back the other dagger i gave him before to see if he’d pick which one he wants to use and here he is using his new one.... baby likes his present im so glad,

granted its probably just like, an automatic npc thing to just use whatever weapon has the best stats but i like to think he likes it

he still says the line all the time he doesn’t have like. special dialogue if you Do give him skyforge steel or anything but still

anyway i also had this mission going for boethiah where i was supposed to. bring her a sacrifice, essentially. which, yeah, ok, obvious bad idea, but im already an assassin, whats the difference at this point right 

my first thought was to go hire a random mercenary at windhelm, since many of the most unpleasant people in skyrim seem to live there, and i figured the chances were pretty good hes racist and insufferable like the others

but we ended up killing a dragon together and god damn it hes actually a nice guy, i like him :’) so we’re friends now after all

however, boethiah still needed a sacrifice, and. there’s this drunk guy in markarth you can hire after you defeat him in a brawl, and. he doesn’t seem to have a lot going on in his life other than shit tons of mead, so. i figured he’d do :’ ) 

holy FUCK

i dont regret carrying out this quest bc like... A) it was really cool and B) -

i eventually got this fuckin SICK armor out of it that ups my stealth while actually being pretty legit defense, and it poisons any enemies that come near me but somehow doesnt poison friendly npcs which is WILD and incredibly convenient for when im getting mobbed but dont want to accidentally murder whatever companion i have with me at the time

i do feel bad about sacrificing cosnach though like. he was little more than a random drunk guy but that doesn’t mean he deserved it, y’know :’ ) i couldn’t find anyone i hated that would also follow me though

also i later discovered on the wiki you can actually marry that guy, and im just like. why, out of all the options you have in skyrim, would you go for “random drunk dude who gets in bar fights” 

i dunno maybe he grows on you if you fight with him for a while but i didnt want to get attached again :’) 

i found wisps??? i think?????? i couldnt figure out any way to interact with them but they glow and bounce around and i LOVE them

woah!!!!!!

i. dont remember what was in there but apparently the wisps really wanted me to find it 

(i do remember getting stuck in this room and couldn’t figure out how to get the door to open though so i just kinda backtracked and left the way i came in, dunno if i missed anything important or if it was just an alternate way out that i couldnt figure out) 

[dccrossmusic-blog]

Well that'a a wrap- the D.C Cross Ecstatic Racquet album tour is complete! Thank you so much to all my new fans and old fans for the support! It was a lot of fun. I probably drove more than 10000 kms for the 9 shows- which is mental..it was all good until the car broke down in Albury on the weekend- keep reading and you can hear about the drama of the last 48 hours in point form!

Thanks to all the nice people, other musicians and venues and sound people and bar people at the places i played at. All thank you for the free beers, dinners and when people let me stay at the venue or their homes for free. Super mega thank you to Dusty Attic Music Lounge , Howl & Moan Records, Petersham Bowling Club, Plantbased Wholefoods, The Merri Creek Tavern , Franks Wild Years, Mounties and the Bridge Hotel Castlemaine (which is impossible to tag on Facebook).

So everyone is always crapping on about stuff that happens to them on social media but the last 48hours of my tour was quite eventful and i think entertaining for others. Here in point form i will mention the unfolding of the events.

Saturday 3pm Show in Thirroul - Sunday 3pm Show in Castlemaine, Victoria - a bit of driving (about 1700 kms there and back to Sydney) but pretty straight forward- right..what could possibility go right :/

•drive from Marrickville to Thirroul - so far so good

• play a cosy show to some nice people at Franks' Wild Years- very impressed german guy says that i am a beautiful musician and play the guitar like John Frusciante from the Chill Peppers - Brad other founding original member of Gerling comes to the show-a wonderful gesture of support

•Finish show in Thirroul and with a broken GPS head on the drive to Castlemaine, Victoria (about 845km's).

•Get tailgated on the Bulli Pass by some tradie fuckhead- a bit of an anxious 10 minutes but make it okay - our faithful 2004 Holden still seems to be okay.

•Drive for 5 hours on route to Albury as its more than halfway.

•100 kms out of Albury car starts shaking uncontrollably - i thought it was just the Hume Highway - so just cranked AC/DC and LANKUM new album on the distorted car stereo.

•60 km's nearer Albury situation with car gets worse- now know it was a busted CV crankshaft (no idea) and apparently quite dangerous

•Navigate car into Albury and call road side assistance. Sounds like i get a drunk Andrew Jackson Calvert type guy on the phone who relishes in the fact he can say that they can't help me and can tow the vehcile to a mechanic on Monday morning. It's 9.30 Pm Saturday night

•Find the cheapest accom in Albury -$66 a night and stay above a 2 floored techno beer barn full of teenagers on MDMA and very loud party remix / techno music going on. The room looks like was last renovated in the 1950's.

•Call the only guy i know in Albury and hit the RSL after Ross Wilson had just played. Didn't see Ross and damn glad i didn't hear 'Come said the Boy' the second most dodgy song in Australian Music History.

•Stash broken down car in Coles car park. Got to bed in backpackers with Digitalism's - Zdarlight blasting through the building.

•Awake sunday morning and hire car and drive to Castlemaine.

•An hour out of Albury a crazed fucktard - Chopper Reid vibe guy - cruising along in a shitbox Commodore with two kids bikes strapped to the back - a blue bike and little pink bike gets upset that i overtake him on the freeway. As im overtaking he speeds up- i was wasnt really checking my rear view mirror as as i was looking straight ahead to overtake- pretty legit an safe driving from me- anyway, Chopper Reid speeds up and whist i'm overtaking and gets really really mad..i do the thumbs up mate sign and makes him even more angrier..he follows my agrresively for the next 200 kilometres.. very intimidating - the most alarming thought of this was if he is driving so recklessly with two small kids in the car (nee the bikes) imagine what he would do if he caught up to me after 2 hours of full on road rage anger. Yep just what i need right now- anyway decide to James Bond him and speed up so he cant see me, speed into a truck parking side station behind a bunch of bushes- wait till i see him fly pass - teeth grinding trying to find me. Wait 5 minutes and commence my ongoing, fun-filled journey

•Castlemaine Bridge Hotel is a lot further than i calculated. And a path i have never journeyed before- no GPS is making trickier.

•3 hours later -- I ARRIVE! PHEW.

•The Bridge Hotel Castlemaine is a safe haven of coolness in all the chaos.

•Meet old friend Casey Rice at the Bridge Hotel and play two sets of my music to people actually listening to my songs- made the ordeal worthwhile and Skyscrapper Stan aka Stan Woodhouse - the kiwi songsmith works there as the barman- equally parts good and evil - that guy is a crackup..easing into the afternoon with a free pint of something, some comedy gold from Stan and a half price healthy dinner with green stuff in it (maybe vegetables- not on a burger bun so im a bit confused how to eat it ).

•Stay the night above the venue and get up at 4am to drive car back to hire car place. Venues alarm system goes off when i'm having a shower…find the exit and leave gracefully

•On the drive back to Albury - around 4.35am my phone GPS stops working and end up on some lonesome unused highway in a State Forrest in the middle of nowhere - using just my instinct to try and navigate back to Albury

•See a giant Pink moon setting over the trees in state forrest - i think heading towards Canberra (no idea) and makes the trip worthwhile

• Two massive kangaroos leap across the road just seconds away from me, right in front of the car- it's still pitch black - i narrowly avoiding hitting them (a split second before this happened a voice in my head said slow down, be careful, i dont wanna kill no kangaroos) - maybe it was the kangaroos mystical vibe -im not sure but seemed like divine intervention for the next 3 hours that we all survived.

•Some how make it to Heathcote, Victoria and get directions to the Hume Highway by a lady working at a servo with a magical hair braid getting hit on by the local milkman (why do all milkman look the same??) . I've never been happier to see the Hume Highway in my life. Listen to Highway to Hell - AC/DC on cd - my close friends mum gave my as a birthday gift she got from her work - a catholic girls schools - the library was throwing the cd out. Also LANKUM new song 'Wild Rover' that sounds equal parts Irish Rebel folk heroes/ Dirty Three and Tool - I'm having a moment.

•Eventually get back to Albury, put all my guitars and merch and amp back in broken car and return the hire car which was three times the amount i thought it would be cause i had driven extra kilometres.

•Get back in my barely drivable broken down car - Monday morning trying to find a mechanic in Albury to repair car. •Seems all mechanic in Albury are too busy- we can fix the car in 5 days time or are on holidays… Stranded far from home….

•Finally find a mechanic on the outskirts of town who can fix the car- drive barley drivable car around Albury trying to find the mechanic- stressing out front wheels will fall off - takes about 20 minutes without gps and hats off the bloke who gave me the best directions of my life to find mechanic.

•Mechanic looks at car and says its my lucky day - they have the spare part in Albury -which is very rare … a new crank shaft (no idea) - and he can fix it straight away ($500 seems reasonable ).

•Wait 5 hours in the belting Albury sun. Eat the biggest and best potato scallops ive ever had (from North Albury) and presto- hand over credit card and Car is fixed. Drink 2 litres of hot Mountain Dew and drive 6 hours and arrive home safely.

• Triumph scene from Rocky -Bill Contis 'Gonna Fly Now (Theme from Rocky) plays out in my head as i drink a beer and lie on the couch. Maybe next time i will fly.

• And thats what it takes to play two shows as an underground cult folk musician in Australia.

• Get Ecstatic

• And please buy my album on bandcamp to help pay mechanic - maybe a Xmas gift, coming of age …. en vogue vinyl experience

•Remember kids, "It's a JUNGLE out there!".

[mondelveg]

Hey is that [CAMILA MENDES]? No, that’s just [MONICA DELLA VEGA]. They’re [TWENTY-ONE], and have spent [ONE YEAR] in Dayton. I hear that they’re kind of [CHARISMATIC], but also [MANIPULATIVE]. Did you hear their vices are [CIGARETTES & SEX]? Cant wait to see [SHE/HER] at the next party! 

hello there friends! my name is paige and this is my smol child monica. shes a gem, truly. super excited to be here bc wow i love this concept?? anyway enough of that, here’s what yall need to know about monica ~

monica rosalinda della vega is the product of the american dream

her father, marco, moved to los angeles from brazil when he was seventeen with the dream of going to college. for years he worked his butt off and eventually saved up enough money to attend college, where he studied political science and pre law

from there, he got a full ride to law school and that was where he met his wife, anna, who was working on her doctorate the two fell in love and got married after marco passed the bar. 

they moved to a small apartment in LA while marco worked his way up in his law firm and anna began her writing

anna was older when they had their first and only son, scott, who is eight years older than monica

after having scott, anna was told she couldn’t have more children, and the couple kind of accepted that and moved on with their lives (they knew anna was older and so like it made sense)

but

then she became pregnant with monica

the couple debated for a long time but anna decided she wanted to carry monica and give birth and all that jazz

which tbh wasn’t the best idea

she went into labor 4 weeks early and actually died while giving birth to monica, so she never knew her mother which is #sad

anna’s death kind of wrecked marco tbh?? like that was the love of his LIFE man and he honestly didnt know what to do without her

in true hamilton fashion, a few weeks after monica was born, the della vega’s moved up town (and by uptown i mean to calabasas bc her dad got a big promotion and they could afford it)

from there life was different in the della vega house. marco was around less, and he actually hired help to raise scott and monica (something he said he’d never do, no matter how much money he made)

there was also a bit of a constant revolving door of women in and out of their lives tbh?? which always effected monica more than scott

monica was always looking for a motherly figure and would get attached and then theyd disappear bc things would end with marco

this really kinda of broke monica, especially after cecila. she and marco dated for most of monica’s middle school years and they almsot got married. monica saw her as a mother figure but something happened ahd cecilia moved out and hasnt spoken to them since

other than the constant family tension at home, monica lived a pretty nice life? 

high school was good

monica came in determined not to be “scott della vega’s little sister”

she made a name for herself, was head cheerleader and student body president and yearbook editor and on prom committee

she graduated top of her class and was headed to yale 

she decided to study journalism and excelled 

the day of her graduation, marco and scott didnt show up, and monica was confused and heartbroken

it was only after that her brother called and informed her that their father had been found dead that morning due to too much alcohol, and that was why he wasn’t there

monica truly didnt know what to do with herself after that

she withdrew from graduate school, packed up her things and decided to head to dayton

she had a friend from childhood that was living in dayton, and when she broke the news they had suggested she come and unwind and figure her life out

2 years later, she still remains

monica works for the local paper as a writer and editor, but she eventually wants more iwth her life?? like shes living off the money her dad left her, which is a lot, but she hates that

personality

I pool inspiration from Elle woods, Brooke Davis, mean girls broadway regina George, heather chandler and Jane Villanueva

she’s one of those girls that just doesn’t care, she’ll do whatever it takes to advance herself and will deserve it too. she’s a hard worker and a smart cookie

people would call her a bitch, but its her honesty. she doesn’t care about you or your feelings, especially when it comes to honesty and uncovering the truth and all of those fun things

but she’s also a lot of fun. she’s a person that people want to be around, someone that pulls people in and make people want to love her and be her friend and marry her?? like its weird, bc she can be really mean and manipulative to et what she wants but people still want to be in her presence

mon also lowkey thrives off of chaos like she enjoys it almost?? her family was always chaotic and its something she almost needs in order to survive

monica is also a bit dark and twisty tbh??

she has pretty bad anxiety and like because of all the shit with her mom and now her dads shit shes actually a bit insecure, especially in relationships

plots

WOW IM THE WORST AT THIS PART

im always open to brainstorm

like i said, she came to dayton because of a childhood friend so maybe that??

roommates!! maybe 2 or 3 people she lives with, could be friends or not

maybe an ex? monica’s lived here 2 years so she was bound to date someone at least at some point

also, hook ups (one of her vices is sex so ??)

maybe the roger to her mimi (if you know rent)?? like the unexpected guy that kind of comes into her life, and she expects it to be like the rest, but its fully not?? thats fun

i also have a wc tag right here so check that out 

so yah that’s it!! like this and we can plot : )

[lilietsblog]

a scattering of extremely specific headcanons about the early life of Franziska von Karma

this is just an assortment of things that don’t really matter and probably won’t even make it into any fic I ever write in full but I have them so here we are

@ace-attorney-headcanons @linda-ravstar @nadiestar @ everyone else i want to see this but cant remember immediately (and count on hopefully seeing this anyway)

at age 13 Franziska von Karma passes the bar and becomes a prosecutor

at that point, she’s been living at a boarding school for a while (for 3 years as a continuation of my other headcanons but thats not the point)

she is not however following the school program, even if she sits in class shes far ahead of her grade and has a set of teachers/tutors/mentors that managed to get her that far

one of them is a rhetorics teacher who got Franziska from nearly completely nonverbal to ready to stand in court in just a few years (this did not take away Franziska’s problems with talking completely but it made her at least capable of using words as a tool in her life)

when she becomes a prosecutor, it’s not near the school but in the area where her father had been prosecuting for the last while and convinced people to take her, aka near in the place where the Von Karma Mansion is at

of course at this point Manfred and Miles are prosecuting back in Japan already so Franziska is kind of on her own

(it’s kind of funny, when I think about the second trilogy I picture it in the States but when I think about the first trilogy I 100% picture it in Japan, even though I picture both being in the same place. It doesn’t really matter though)

this is about the point at which it starts to dawn on Franziska that it doesn’t actually matter what she does, her papa doesn’t care and never did and never will

she’s a smart kid, and her law-centered education includes things such as the definition and varieties of abuse, and she’s known on a certain level for quite some time

it’s just one of those things that are really easy to ignore when you’re not thinking about them, especially when you’re a traumatized tween whose brain fragmentizes thoughts and memories so as to keep the necessary for survival attachment to the parental figure

but she has a job now, and is an adult in her own right, even if she really shouldn’t be yet, and some things are becoming steadily more impossible to ignore

she kind of hates Miles but also really doesn’t, and is maybe sinking into depression a bit but she’s too busy to really notice

the mansion is too big to live in on her own, and it doesn’t feel like home, and the accountant her papa hired for her confirms that she absolutely can afford to rent a small studio apartment closer to her job

the scratched, half-broken, overstuffed blue couch in front of the old not-even-flatscreen tv feels more like the lap of luxury than Franziska’s expensive room filled with expensive things ever has

she eats ice-cream from a tub and watches Steel Samurai on DVD from midnight to 2am, and she doesn’t even really like the cartoon, but she knows what Miles has said or would say about every single character or plot development and it feels more like home than anything else in her life

she wakes up in the morning when the driver papa hired for her lets himself in with the keys she gave him for that purpose and wakes her up, and then sits in the kitchen area and drinks tea with his face politely to the wall while Franziska gets up and goes to wash up and get dressed in the bathroom right behind him, too thirteen and too sleepy to be embarrassed by his presence

he takes her to work and buys her pastries and coffee on the way, and maybe she’s too young for it but who’s he to say what she can and cannot do? there’s a coffee vending machine in the office anyway

most people aren’t Manfred von Karma, so 13 and then 14 year old Franziska isn’t initially left to handle cases on her own. she’s unofficially assigned to an older prosecutor who handles both her cases and his own in all but the courtroom, in exchange for her being his errand girl and assistant for the more boring parts (Franziska is very good at the boring parts)

in the evenings when she comes home she’s busy: she still has to finish the high school program, and then she moves on to a remote college degree

at first she still has time for horses on weekends, but she keeps overstuffing her time, more out of habit than anything, and soon she just has time for horse magazines and books on veterinary medicine

when she remembers this time later, what she has to say is ‘it wasn’t too bad, i guess. i got by’

she can eat all the ice cream she wants, as long as she’s willing to live with the stomach-ache after; this isn’t really the first time she learns about consequences of her actions, but it makes for a nice lighthearted milestone to remember later

her mentor is a better person and a better prosecutor than Manfred von Karma ever was, so he teaches Franziska some better investigating habits without ever realizing she ever had any different. Franziska knows how to be quiet and listen; when she was a child, this was the skill she needed most

she gets her first victories in court on simpler cases that her mentor allows her to handle on her own; on more complex ones she stands as his assistant

then he gets sick and goes to the hospital for a while, because he’s not a young man, and Franziska has to handle her cases on her own now

she does pretty well, better than expected in fact - this would be a crack she’d be falling into, her mentor thinks as he’s helpless to do anything to support her from the hospital bed, but to everyone’s surprise she’s actually alright. she can stand on her own. anyone who doesn’t care to pay attention and thinks that ‘the prosecutor is a fourteen year old girl’ is a beginning of a joke quickly and painfully learns different

this brings her first big case. it’s a serial murder case, and everyone thinks a little girl shouldn’t even be on the crime scene, let alone direct the investigation, and yet

she solves then wins the case

even when her mentor comes back, she now handles her cases on her own, even if she still occasionally comes to him for advice

he misses her; she handled more of his routine than he realized

she has her own routine to handle now, and she finishes her education and just gets more and more consumed by the job, especially as she hears of Miles’ successes

she knows vaguely that what she is doing is different from what her papa taught her, but he doesn’t care so she doesn’t either

she keeps winning, and that’s all that matters. she doesn’t want to think about it

she passes her 15th birthday, then her 16th, then her 17th, and then

[p-aralian]

Men Without Women by Haruki Murakami

Men Without Women is a collection of short stories so I feel like I should review this both by their individual stories and as a whole.

(1) Drive My Car

Okay so let me first just tell you that I read these short stories while I was actually in Japan. Prior to my trip, I didn’t exactly have much knowledge on Japan’s affairs, except pretty much for the Meiji Restoration, which I studied in IB History. But I digress; basically what I’m trying to say is that I had no idea just how bad the gender inequality is in Japan. Like literally, women are still seen as the traditional caregiver, not really meant to be in the workforce but rather fulfil the role of a respectful wife and mother. So I guess I shouldn’t really have been surprised at the sexism in this novel, but it was really eye-opening because I guess Murakami’s expression of people’s lives in the book must be an accurate reflection or depiction of how Japanese people actually live.

The story literally starts with the blatant stereotype that women are bad drivers. Apparently we just don’t know how or aren’t built to operate such heavy machinery? Jesus. Sorry, but it’s actually ridiculous how some men think or rather are brought up to think. Must be the whole Confucianism thing. Also, the woman driver he hired was like what, my age, and he was SEXUALISING her. Okay he was kinda doing the opposite of that, ie, saying that she had no breasts and looked like a man but STILL – why do those things even matter!!! Why are you, a like 50+ year old man, evaluating the looks of a girl, WHO COULD BE YOUR DAUGHTER’S AGE. Please. Just. Stop.

Anyways, that aside. I also didn’t really like the story because it was very strange – the guy knew his wife was having an affair and didn’t call her out on it? And befriended his wife’s lover after she died? Dude, you cray. Who does that? Also, story 1 – man without woman because woman died. But woman was a cheating bitch. So again, not the best impression of women.

- In every situation, knowledge was better than ignorance. However agonizing, it was necessary to confront the facts. Only through knowing could a person become strong. - The proposition that we can look into another person’s heart with perfect clarity strikes me as a fool’s game. I don’t care how well we think we should understand them, or how much we love them. All it can do is cause us pain. Examining your own heart, however, is another matter. I think it’s possible to see what’s in there if you work hard enough at it. So in the end maybe that’s the challenge: to look inside your own heart as perceptively and seriously as you can, and to make peace with what you find there. If we hope to truly see another person, we have to start by looking within ourselves.

(2) Yesterday

I liked this one. I don’t really get how this falls into place with regard to the underlying thread that is supposed to bind all the stories together – “men without women”. Honestly, I don’t want to go too deep into this story. Essentially it’s about two people that the narrator knew who could have been together, probably wanted to or were meant to, but didn’t. (Note: there’s a touch of a woman’s unfaithfulness in this one too). Anyways, I feel like it’d be better if I just shared my favourite quotes from it:

- I wonder if life should really be that easy, that comfortable. It might be better to go our separate ways for a while, and if we find out that we really can’t get along without each other, then we get back together. - Maybe going through that kind of tough, lonely experience is necessary when you’re young? Part of the process of growing up? … The way surviving hard winters makes a tree grow stronger, the growth rings inside it tighter. - I truly love Aki-kun, and I don’t think I could ever feel the same way about anybody else. Whenever I’m away from him I get this terrible ache in my chest, always in the same spot. It’s true. There’s a place in my heart reserved just for him. But at the same time I have this strong urge inside me to try something else, to come into contact with all kinds of people. Call it curiosity, a thirst to know more. More possibilities. It’s a natural emotion and I can’t suppress it, no matter how much I try. - Music has that power to revive memories, sometimes so intensely that they hurt.

(3) An Independent Organ

This one was my favourite. It really got to me. Like really got to me. Like I was crying for quite a while after I was done with it. The narrator was again talking about someone else’s life, a plastic surgeon and bachelor who had never been in a long-term relationship with a woman but rather preferred to have good conversations, good sex and no commitment. (Fair enough, I get that). So most of his women tend to be married because apparently a lot of women want the committed part of a relationship with their husbands but ALSO the company of another man who can remind them what it’s like to date and flirt and whatever, I don’t know. Anyways, this doctor falls in love, with a married woman. Surprise surprise. But no. He then has an existential crisis and then dies. He dies because he is lovesick and heartbroken and he dies at his own hands, condemning himself to a slow death by anorexia. He becomes but a shadow of his former self and just dies. Because of the bitch, who not only abandons her husband but also the doctor for, get this, a THIRD lover. Ok so, unfaithfulness again. But that’s not the point.

I feel it was a little melodramatic and unrealistic that he just gave up on life after this woman broke his heart (or maybe it isn’t, maybe because he was so set in his ways of non-commitment that falling in love with a woman and then being betrayed by her could be so heart-breaking that he wanted to reduce himself to nothing? I still think it’s a bit much but it’s not my place to comment on these things after all.) Nonetheless, it broke my heart. I can’t even begin to imagine what betrayal feels like – like he said, if she had told him that she couldn’t be with him because she wanted to keep her family together, he would have been fine, but it was solely the very act of betrayal that drove him to non-existence. Fuck.

My favourite quotes are as follows:

- I’ve been out with lots of women who are much prettier than her, better built, with better taste, and more intelligent. But those comparisons are meaningless. Because to me she is someone special. A ‘complete presence,’ I guess you could call it. All of her qualities are tightly bound into one core. You cant separate each individual quality to measure and analyse it, to say it’s better or worse than the same quality in someone else. It’s what’s in her core that attracts me so strongly. Like a powerful magnet. It’s beyond logic. - ‘Having seen my love now / and said farewell / I know how very shallow my heart was of old / as if I had never before known love – Gonchunagon Atsutada ... I’ve finally experienced what the poet felt. The deep sense of loss after you’ve met the woman you love, have made love, then said goodbye. Like you’re suffocating. The same emotion hasn't changed at all in a thousand years. I’ve never had this feeling up till now, and it makes me realise how incomplete I’ve been, as a person. - The more I get to know her, the more I love her. We’ve gone out for a year and a half, but right now I’m even more entranced than I was at the beginning. It feels like our hearts have become intertwined. Like when she feels something, my heart moves in tandem. Like we’re two boats tied together with rope. Even if you want to cut the rope, there’s no knife sharp enough to do it. - As long as it makes sense, no matter how deep you fall, you should be able to pull yourself together again. - Women are all born with a special independent organ that allows them to lie. It depends on the person, about the kind of lies they tell, what situation they tell them in, and how the lies are told. But at a certain point in their lives, all women tell lies, and they lie about important things. They lie about unimportant things, too, but they also don’t hesitate to lie about the most important things. And when they do, most women’s expressions and voices don’t change at all, since it’s not them lying, but this independent organ they’re equipped with that’s acting on its own. That’s why – except in a few special cases – they can still have a clear conscience and never lose sleep over anything they say. - Just as that woman likely lied to him with her independent organ, Dr. Tokai – in a somewhat different sense – used this independent organ to fall in love. A function beyond his will. With hindsight it’s easy for someone else to sadly shake his head and smugly criticize another’s actions. But without the intervention of that kind of organ – the kind that elevates us to new heights, thrusts us down to the depths, throws our minds into chaos, reveals beautiful illusions, and sometimes even drives us to death – our lives would indeed be indifferent and brusque. Or simply end up as a series of contrivances.

The paragraph on women born with the ability to lie really got to me. 

(4) Scheherazade

Lol. I had a friend called Scheherazade so this was very difficult to read without imagining her. Also because it’s a pseudonym for a Japanese woman, but I just wasn’t able to picture it that way?!!! Okay. I’m going to call her Schez for short. Schez is weird. She talks about her past, in which she describes having a crush on a guy in high school and sneaking out of school to break into his house and smell his things and god knows what else – not cool at all, in fact really creepy. Another thing is, she’s a caretaker who has sex with the dude. Is that a thing? I wish they’d say a little bit more about who the narrator was and why he needed such caretaking to begin with? It all just felt really misplaced. Also don’t get how this fits the whole men without women theme again. Oh and also, Schez was married and I really don’t think the sex can just be dismissed or classified as simply being part of her job – that’s total unfaithfulness as well. Please.

- Life is strange, isn’t it? You can be totally entranced by the glow of something one minute, be willing to sacrifice everything to make it yours, but then a little time passes, or your perspective changes a bit, and all of a sudden you’re shocked at how faded it appears. What was I looking at? you wonder.

(5) Kino

I like this one. Since I’ve been consistent in highlighting this fact, let me just start by saying – there’s unfaithfulness by a woman in this, AGAIN. But other than that, it was really mysterious which was a welcome change. Were the supernatural occurrences real or were they just manifestations of the narrator’s subconscious, forcing him to come to terms with how he truly felt about his wife’s infidelity? This felt like proper Murakami. The snakes, the vanishing cat, the rain, the knocking, I loved it.

(6) Samsa in Love

I have Franz Kafka’s The Metamorphosis somewhere. I think it’s in London in my brother’s house. I wish I’d read it before this. Maybe then I would’ve had a little more context for this story. But alas it’s not hard to figure. Metamorphosis. That’s pretty self-explanatory. Reviewers online say it’s an interesting take on Gregor Samsa. I don’t know, I don’t really have too much to say about it really. Also, don’t really see how it fits in with the theme again. You know what, that’s it. I got nothing.

(7) Men Without Women

“Men Without Women”. Repeated way too many times in one story. Okay so the narrator receives a phone call from his ex-lover’s husband to be told that she is dead. He thinks about her and their time together and also of how he imagines meeting her earlier in high school and stuff like that. I dunno. I just liked how she played a certain song when they had sex. In fact, you know what I love all of Murakami’s allusions to music and the power it has on people, on memories, on emotions. If I can relate to anything, hell it’s that.  

So I read in an interview with Murakami that he doesn’t analyse the images or thoughts derived from his subconscious which form the content of his stories, instead he merely records them. Honestly, I don’t want to over-analyse it either. These stories took me on a journey, gave me a peek into different worlds, some of which I could relate to more than others. I am glad to have read them and that’s that! 

[vibrant-goddess]

yeah im drinking a bit at 130am i have to be at work in five hours but im SAD and i hate my coworkers and im gonna stay up and feel like shit all week so you know fuck it im gonna bitch about it on main bc im tired of giving a fuck about what people think of me and im not putting it under the cut because i seriously dont fucking care

i shoulda bought more cigarillosi havent fucking smoked in seven years like my parents found my cigars when i was a baby adult and yelled at me so i tossed them and never looked back

except now i live on my own in a tiny shitty room that is cheap enough for me to pay off my student loans real fucking fast living with two extremely adorable dogs(they’re my roommates) who dont like being petted so what even are they good for except dragging in dead animals all the fucking time and leaving hair everywhere literally i had to stop baking for my coworkers because no matter how clean i was i ALWAYS FOUND MORE FUCKING FUR but its fine because i don’t like these coworkers anyways

like i know i work in tech but what are the fucking chances that my team would be four white blonde guys(at least two are blue eyed) in their early thirties and then me like what the FUCK and i still have two more months with these fuckers. i have to figure out how to survive eight more weeks with these people who don’t like or respect me. i feel like a goddamn token minority hire and it makes me want to quit. like, just straight up two weeks notice i don’t give a FUCK about completing the rest of my work i don’t give a FUCK about helping this team i don’t give a FUCK about this work assignment my coworkers are so fucking dismissive and passive aggressive AT BEST and whiny turds at worst. i hate coming in at 630 and leaving at 345 without taking a lunch so my work has gotten like 10 extra hours of work for me thats literally, after tax, another student loan payment.

im so fucking miserable here. this town is so fucking small. theres nothing to do here except spend twenty dollars to go to tea except i have to do it myself bcause i dont know how to fucking interact wioth people

and then i thought this month oh ill try to get people i like together for halloween movies at my house except my house is a disaster because my roommate doesnt know how to fucking clean her shit up

literally her dogs shit on the couch and she took hours to do a half assed job of cleaning up. i cleaned the table, the kitchen, the floors, everything, and within two weeks she covered the newly cleaned surfaces with her shit. and like, its like pulling teeth to even get her to move her shit from the dryer after a MONTH so i know any sort of cleaning isn;t going to get done by her

like i thought leaving my parents house would make things so much better i thought the distance would allow me to finally live like an adult, but im essentially living the same fucking life, overextended by my responsibilities, depressed to the point of ideation, too anxious to talk to anyone, except now i have quadruple the bills, still no fucking s/o because apparently im totally unfuckable like even this fucking loser from target ghosted me, and my parents passive aggressively text me everyday because i don’t update them all the time on my THRILLING life that consists of a nine hour work day, three hours of studying for a professional exam that my work won’t pay for, and two hours of costume shit based on a character in a game series i don’t even fucking like for a party im not even going to attend 

and like the obvious answer is drop the costume shit, block your parents for a couple weeks, and go to therapy. i hurried i RUSHED to get my own health insurance so i could finally finally get therapy, only to find out that if my work finds out im getting therapy theyll block any chance at promotion and in this small shitty town there are ten total therapists in a sixty mile radius, only two of which specialize in the CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) except one is a dude and the other does christian counseling and i fucking refuse to interact with religion i dropped any pretense of religion four years ago and im not fucking going back and if you even FUCKING mention it to me i stg so i guess i have to take my chances with the dude

god i dont want to go to work tomorrow but ive p consistently taken a day off every two weeks and im trying to save up my leave for when i want to just fucking ditch out for a week next year after i pay off my student loans

like EVERYTHING WAS SUPPOSED TO BE BETTER ONCE I MOVED. i told myself oh everything will be better once i transfer except it wasnt i got even more stressed and felt more pressure. i told myself oh everything will be bettwe once i graduate except not only was it not but i hit the worst period of my life after graduating i couldn’t socialize i couldn’t speak i just laid on the floor of my childhood room crying and cutting myself because i couldn’t functgion because life didnt have purpose anymore. i told myself oh everything will be better once i move out once im away from the environment tht made me sick BUT GUESS WHAT TUMBLR the FUCKING ENVIRONMENT THAT MADE ME SICK WAS ME. GUESS WHAT I’M THE TOXIC PRESENCE IN MY LIFE. GUESS WHAT YOU CAN’T RUN AWA FROM YOUR OWN BRAIN.

im so fucking tired of trying im so tired of waiting for things to get better i keep trying things i did cbt on my own for months and it did nothing i drank a lot for a month and it did nothing but make me pee a lot i smoked again and it didn’t help i start cutting again and it did nothing like the only vice i have is eating except to pay off my student loans asap my food budget got stripped so i cant even do that and im just. im so fucking tired of this. im tired of throwing money at my student loan app. im tired of having no room besides my bed so i have to cut fabric while laying under my bed because there no room for me and my cutting mat. im tired of spending every weekend studying my fe study materials for an exam to get a certification my work doesn’t care about whatsoever. im tired of not feeling excited about anything. this is usually my favorite month of the year and i havent done a single fall activity. i dont know why the only person in this stupid city who likes me is the dude who realized im the only single black girl in the city and therefore has decided to make it his mission to try to wear me down so he can fuck me. im tired of working in a team where i have to be the voice of all women all black people and all queer people. im tired of having to either report my comings and goings to my parents from two hundred miles away when they don’t pay for any of my shit(in fact, i pay for some of their shit and they still demand updates like they’re entitled to my fucking life) hold on im getting another drink

and like if i want to even be considered one of the team i have to perform to perfection better than the other fuckers on the team whic means i have to show up before the earliest arriver and leave after my boss leaves and i still gotta do all my personal shit and i cant take a lunch and im UFKCKING SICK OF IT. the other team in our open office is a million times more diverse, they actually communicate and discuss shit. their boss is a woman and they occasionally have women on their team on assignment. they spent an hour debating and charting pizza topping preferences so they could order pizza together. meanwhile, my team cant even be assed to actually ask me a question. 

i dont fucking want to go to work tomorrow. i dont want to fucking go back to this team ever again. my boss offered me a permanent position and i didnt know how to tell him that i hate this team and i cant wait to leave and mute the team server forever and if my next assignment didnt require an additional security thing(DESPITE THE FACT THAT I’VE NEVER STEPPED OUT OF LINE MY ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE I HAD GOOD HS ATTENDANCE I PARTICIPATED IN CLUBS I GOT A FUCKING NATIONAL AWARD I VOLUNTEERED WITH A CHRISTIAN CHURCH I PARTICIPATED IN CLUBS AND STUDENT ORGS IN COLLEGE I DIDNT DRINK A SIP OF ALCOHOL UNTIL I WAS 21 I DIDN’T SMOKE UNTIL I WAS 18 I NEVER TRIED ANY DRUGS NOT EVEN WEED IN FACT THE MOMENT DRUGS WERE PRESENT IN MY SOCIAL CIRCLES I LEFT THOSE SOCIAL CIRCLES AND NEVER LOOKED BACK I NEVER COMMITTED ANY CRIMES I NEVER ASSOCIATED WITH ANYONE WHO DID CRIMES IVE NEVER LEFT THE COUNTRY AS AN ADULT I LITERALLY HAVE THE BACKGROUND OF SOMEONE WHO SPENT 25 YEARS SITTING IN A ROOM EATING SALTINES AND STARING AT A WALL UNTIL I STARTED WORKING) that is taking fucking forever despite my perfect background i would have left this assignment early AND i would have given them excellent documentation when i went.

im so fucking tired. im tired of everything.

[goldshitter]

so im thinking of doing something impractical with my life, like dropping out of school and pursuing writing. i tried school, for three years i tried, ive been in uni on and off, always halfway through a credit before withdrawing due to mental illness. this semester i had 2 courses, 2, and i couldnt even finish it without giving up and being lazy and/or depressed. if i cant even do 2 courses, how will i manage the next decade? (because at the rate i was going, it would take a decade before i finished undergrad)

so maybe school isnt for me. not for now, at least. but im so scared. because if i don’t go to school, what’s even the point of my existence? i go to school so i can find a job, so i can write on the side. i can’t just skip the middle part and go directly to writing, right?

and my friends, what will they think? who would actually support a fledgling writer, who has a high school diploma and nothing else to her name? who lives with her dad and relies on her parents for food and finances while her friends are out getting degrees and working and and. who wouldn’t think i’m being stupid and wasting my education?

and my parents, im thinking of telling them i’ll be taking online courses because no way would i disappoint them like that. my dad moved across the country to live with me and support me so i could get through undergrad. he found a job here, went out of retirement, for me and the family. my mom is alone in toronto for me. how disappointed would they be to find out im not staying in school? and i come from a chinese background, while my parents aren’t overly traditional, i dont think they know a world without formal education in it. its what they had to go through to survive the communist regime and not end up farmers, and i think its the least they expect of me, to get through school. but maybe they would understand? im crying just imagining them understanding and supporting my writing career, but until im certain of it, im not risking their disappointment

and to write. to actually write. to get through the laziness and lack of motivation and actually build up a body of work. its going to be hard, because of depression, because of my own laziness. but unlike for school, its something im willing to suffer for, to push through, because i love writing, i really do, i get high off of it and live for it. i just dont persevere enough. but if i want to write as a career, i will have to

my boyfriend supports me, and two of my friends (who also dropped out of school due to mental health) understand, so i guess im not as alone as i think i am. but im so scared right now, so unsure and insecure, of my own writing capabilities, of my own future, but honestly, i dont have a future with school, at least not in my current state. so why shouldnt i pursue something i love and am good at, even while i wonder if im good enough to become published, even while i rely on my parents for support while im putting myself out there. im so scared because school is all ive known, its what i was good at, still am good at when i actually do the work. and to give that up, is like giving up my own foundation, and i feel so lost and directionless without it. only im not directionless. because i have writing. and i think im writing this not just to convince myself that i can do this (because that will take time. im still in denial about all this tbh) but to convince others i can. i want to prove people wrong, if they dont believe in me. but hey, maybe im making drama where there is none, maybe others will support and believe in me rather than put me down or tell me i cant do it. maybe their doubts are valid, because mine sure are. but seriously, staying in school uses up money and years of my life, and if i can’t even hold two courses down maybe i need to think of other options. and my other options include finding a job (but who would hire someone with a high school diploma who has no technical skills to her name? i could find a job as a barista but i dont think my energy levels can handle shifts at the moment) or just gaming all day (and i do that, but i dont want gaming to be the only point to my existence). so i’ll write. i still have to finish this semester first, im going to ask for standing deferrals so i can get extensions until the end of summer for my assignments, and deal with that. but i’ll also write, build up that novel in my mind and get it out, and ill start from there. because i have potential. and i feel like my whole life has led up to writing, it’s always been there for me, i’ve always wanted to be an author, the only difference is i cant procrastinate on being a writer and leave it to my future, it’ll just have to happen earlier than i expected

so yeah

my future

i desperately want people’s support but first i need to believe in myself, and thats going to take a lot of work to work through my doubts and continue writing

all this feels so surreal, you know? to decide in the span of a day to give up school and move on to writing full time is so mindshifting an experience, i need time to process and accept things. and again, i still have a few months to get through my current classes and talk to my parents and go to china and visit my family, so i guess its not going to start too suddenly. i just have to write everyday, now that im not doing schoolwork and want to pick up writing as a career

(until i get published though, ill never think of writing as a career in all honesty. and i dont think ill be taken seriously until i do get published. fuck, im just imagining my other friends hearing about this. theyre going to doubt me so much, but maybe not as much as ill doubt myself)

anyway

yeah

i need to cry and process things

[themoneybuff-blog]

How Long Could YOU Survive a Job Shutdown? This Simple, Reassuring Tactic Can Help You Prepare

The partial government shutdown has had a serious impact on 800,000 federal employees, including those with essential jobs who are required to work without pay. A quick look at news and social media (especially at Twitters #ShutdownStories) reveals tales of anxiety and sometimes outright terror. If we arent affected ourselves, an all-too-human reaction is to avert our eyes from the misery, silently thanking Deity Of Choice that we arent government employees. Wed do much better to take the shutdown as an object lesson. Even if we dont work for Uncle Sam, we cant truly know that our own employment is rock-solid. We cant predict layoffs, illness, or our companies closing down or being sold to a new owner who slashes personnel by one-third. However, theres a way to prepare for such crises. Its called a Financial Fire Drill, and its both simple and crucial. The FFD is a focused look at essential expenses and how you might cover them during a no-work period, plus a list of resources that answer all the what-ifs. Sound scary? On the contrary! Its liberating as heck to determine how little you could get by on if push comes to shove: If I lose my job or theres another shutdown, we could actually get by on as little as $1,000 dollars a month until times were better. A healthy emergency fund is useful for such an occasion. Some money wonks suggest you have three to six months worth of expenses saved; others insist you need a years worth. While thats a fine theory, it isnt always possible. Besides, the whole point of having the EF isnt just to spend it! Its there in case of emergencies that cant be covered any other way. And if it took more than three months to find a new job or recover from your illness, youd still have bills to pay and no more financial cushion. Thats why a financial fire drill is multifaceted. Rather than relying solely on the money you already have, it gives you a range of strategies. How Much Do You Need? Start your FFD by determining your households absolute baseline expenses in four categories: food, rent/mortgage, utilities, and essential debt service (things like child support and your auto loan). Baseline is the key word here. For example, if you currently pay extra on your mortgage, youd stop doing that temporarily. Luckily, food is the simplest (although not always the easiest!) thing to cut back on; during a crisis youd nix meals out temporarily and switch to basic (but still healthy and delicious) home cooking. As for utilities, consider whats essential. Cable television isnt really a baseline expense, for example you could do without for a few months. If you keep your house overly heated or cooled because you like it that way (versus because someone in your home is medically fragile), then it would be time to look for ways to cool off naturally or to stay warm while turning down the thermostat.(This isnt punishment. Its prudence. Its smart use of available resources and, maybe, a little bit of short-term sacrifice for the sake of your future financial goals.) Add up the baseline expenses and youll have the number you need to beat. If you can come up with that amount every month, youll manage. Finding the Funds Now that you know how much you need, where will you get the dollars? Best-case scenario: Your household has another income source that will mostly or completely cover those essentials. Obviously this would be super-double-awesome, but it probably isnt going to happen in every case. Not everyone can apply for unemployment. (I cant, because Im a private contractor.) If you dont know whether youre eligible, find out. Then bookmark the U.S. Department of Labors CareerOneStop page, so youll be ready to file if necessary. The page also has links to employment and training programs and other useful information. One of the most important things to note is how much you could expect to get if you qualify. Ideally, it would be enough to cover your monthly baseline. But even if it is, thats not the end of your financial fire drill. Pulling in Extra Dollars Going from month to month on just-enough can mean serious anxiety. Were doing OK now, but what if the car breaks down and I cant job-hunt? For this reason, your FFD needs to include ways to bring in extra dollars. A part-time or occasional job (side hustle) is one way to do it. Websites like SideHusl.com and 1099Mom.com are a good place to start. They have job possibilities you might never have imagined. While the gig economy has its issues, it can be a godsend to those in temporary straits. Driving for Lyft or Uber can take a toll on your vehicle beyond, but some say the pay and tips can be lucrative. Non-gig-economy jobs could be available near you, too. Now before you need one start investigating possibilities like delivering pizza, taking on a newspaper route (theyre screaming for drivers where I live), or working in retail or food service. If youve got a college degree, you could look into becoming a substitute teacher. Applying takes time due to the need for a background check, so look into the requirements now. Start by contacting the school district to see if the demand is high. Or create your own income stream. Let it be known through friends and on social media that youre available to walk dogs, babysit, clean houses, or whatever youre good at doing. Tutor kids or teens in math, Spanish, or whatever subject you know well. (Pro tip: Find out what tutoring goes for in your area, to keep from undercharging.) Fix up the spare room nicely and look into options like hosting guests through Airbnb and Homestay.com. Fun fact: If you rent part or all of your primary residence for 14 days or fewer in a year, you dont have to pay taxes on the money you earn. Really! See Chapter 5, page 18 of this Internal Revenue Service publication for the details. Finally, take a hard look at what you own. Make a list of what could be sold on LetGo.com or OfferUp.com if worst came to worst. Listing Possible Resources The unemployment website mentioned above is just a start. The Benefits.gov site features more than 1,200 state and federal benefit and assistance programs. One you really need to learn about is the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, the new name for food stamps. Each state has a different process, so take some time to learn about yours. For example, you might be required to provide your childs birth certificate got any idea where it is? Feeding America has a food bank locator. Take a minute to look for local resources, and either bookmark the locator or make a list of whats available nearby. Another excellent resource is 211.org, a clearinghouse for social services. Put it on your list of places to call when things get hairy. However, no single resource is all-encompassing; fledgling or hyper-local organizations might fly under even 211.orgs radar. For that reason, be prepared to ask this question of any agency you wind up contacting: Are there any other resources that could help someone in my circumstances? Anyone with student loans should learn about forbearance and deferment. The U.S. Department of Education tells more in this article, which also offers information on student loan consolidation and income-based repayment plans. If youve just been laid off youre likely to be frozen with shock, fear or rage; learning more about your options now, when youre calm, is a good idea. Cut Some Costs, on Paper As noted earlier, youd cut back on extra mortgage payments and meals out. Brainstorm some other ways to pare down expenses. If push comes to shove, you could suspend that gym membership, cancel your cable service, put a temporary halt on529 plancontributions, throttle back on your kids extracurricular activities, cancel any subscription services, re-think the way you entertain yourselves, and look for better deals on cellphone service. An optional (yet recommended) tactic is to do some real worst-case scenario planning. Would it be possible to find a cheaper place to live? If so, could your buddy with a truck help you move vs. your having to rent a moving van? Speaking of friends: If the tough times lingered, would a friend rent you a room vs. your getting an entire apartment? Would really good friends take turns letting you couch-surf? Maybe your sister would take temporary custody of your cat or your cockatiel until you could afford to feed both the pet and yourself. Perhaps you could hire yourself out as a live-in nanny, to avoid having to pay for housing at all. (I know a young woman who put herself through college that way.) Finally: If youre carrying even a little bit of consumer debt right now, make it your mission to vanquish it as soon as possible. Paying interest is a horrible idea even when times are good; paying extra money out when theres no money coming in is infinitely worse. Yay! Youre Done! Now: What to do with all this information? Why, you put it into a folder (real or virtual) and file it away under Hope This Never Happens. Nobody wants to think about losing some or all of their household income. But better to think about it now than the day when your boss greets you by saying, Clean out your desk or your doctor calls and says, We need to talk. Relatively few schools burn down each year, yet we have fire drills anyway. Its part of keeping our kids protected. Give your finances the same kind of care and forethought by starting your own financial fire drill today. Award-winning journalist and veteran personal finance writerDonna Freedmanis the author of Your Playbook for Tough Times: Living Large on Small Change, for the Short Term or the Long Haul and Your Playbook for Tough Times, Vol. 2: Needs AND Wants Edition. More byDonna Freedman: https://www.thesimpledollar.com/financial-fire-drill-how-long-could-you-survive-a-job-shutdown/