#fastidious beaver

[lightningblade1994-blog]

06/20/2023

Masahito Fujiwami:[Yelps as his assistant shows up behind him whilst he was dancing] Fastidious Beaver: I just thought you might like a latte with steamed Austrian goat milk. Masahito Fujiwami: What do I look like? An Imbecile?! Of course I want a latte. I love the way you make them!

[its-your-girl-geekerella]

I'm in a Sonic Boom mood today

[krafterwrites]

I’m intrigued by Perci because she existed as a background character before getting this prominent role, but she’s not a regular like Mayor Fink or Fastidious Beaver, I’m pretty sure the only notable appearance she’s had before now is her and her twin sister (?) walking with Knuckles in the late night show episode

[srkizer]

of all the casts knuckles definitely would be the best (unlicensed) therapist for sure though.

sonic: no way he's listening, he hates doing that

tails: he's gonna try so hard to come up with a "solution" that is worthy of "you tried" cake, usually involving some mechanical devices

amy: seems to be technically having a license and tries to make the best out of it but something's very off about the counseling sessions given by her. but she does try

sticks: all your problems will be fixed by applying a layer of tinfoil if you're an organic creature

eggman: he has problems and you would be stacking on each others' problems

comedy chimp: do you really risk becoming a material for his skits

fastidious beaver: i guess he can help by making you forget about your normal problems by filling your thought clouds with grammatical corrections

most of others not mentioned: constant snark levels too high enough to be not really counted as dependable

meanwhile knuckles would just be there and listen. a good listener probably is what you want in general. he'd be a great secret keeper too; not gonna iterate again over how knuckles just acts dumb to blend in.

[themurderofsonic-knockout]

Please reblog for a larger voting pool

Propaganda under the cut

The President:

...he's the president. What else do we need to say.

Fastidious Beaver:

Someone will murder him just because of getting done with his "Actually, it's *insert corrected term*" nonsense. He also said that his greatest strength is his incredible cowardice

All Propaganda has been submitted

[sonicboomseason3]

Sonic boom season 3 ep where omega uses his experience in law to defend shadow in court. (he was accused of killing fastidious beaver and no one really cares but still. Murder. He also is 100% guilty) Edgebot from the Brude episode is the prosecutor. Omega manages to pin the blame on sonic somehow and then fastidious beaver just. Walks into the court room. Turns out he just got knocked out instead of actually killed(which was the goal). No one knows how they managed an autopsy without actually harming him. The episode ends with T.W. barker asking Omega to defend him in court against charges of extortion. Omega gets paid for none of this btw.

HELP? i already wanted to come up with an episode that was a parody of ace attorney and you just fed me thank u. also you are so based for the multiple references to my other posts no one normal would say this but im so glad i turned on anon on tumblr dot com

anyway lemme add on to this:

its obvious from the get go to the audience that shadows guilty. not because hes a bad liar or anything he just doesnt care to pretend. what does he have to lose? his freedom??? the prison doesnt want him they know better than to attempt to detain him. his reputation??? right, because hes so clearly known for his innocent harmless and gentle demeanor with everyone. hell if he goes down as the one who killed fastidious beaver, people will finally take him seriously again after being forced into so many comedic scenarios for this blasted shows universe. the only thing stopping him from standing up and outright confirming that he did it is that hed never hear the end of it from omega whos high key excited for his debut as a lawyer

tw barker wanted to continue his lawyer career so he practically begged shadow to hire him but like... he does c/rypto on the side and shadows an anticapitalist king so he essentially told him to eff off

the "courtroom" is just meh burger reorganized so half of the tables represent the prosecutors desk and the other half the defenses. the restaurant counter is the judges chair. there may be an actual courthouse they can do this at but after that one time omega left the restaurant he got placed under house arrest or should it be called restaurant arrest? is meh burger technically his home or……… he cant leave or else a self destruct switch will activate is what im trying to say

(hi its me from the future <3 apparently anons idea resonated so hard with me that i got kinda carried away with my little additions and i dont wanna be obnoxious if i can help it so im putting this under a read more okay continue on. or not if you dont wanna hear about how literally the entire trial goes i guess)

knuckles is the judge which makes perfect logical sense

the detective is vector whos televising this entire trial while hes at it. he barely has anything to work with because a CERTAIN SOMEONE disposed of the body but from what he could piece together fastidious beaver was being annoying at meh burger so shadow grabbed him by the scruff, dragged him over the counter, and dunked his head into the deep fryer. as anon mentioned he somehow survives this

sticks conducted the autopsy and by that i mean she whacked fastidious beaver in the head with her boomerang a couple of times and when he didnt wake up from that she hurled him into the sea. once again this makes perfect logical sense its not like we have other characters much better equipped to be scientific about this. and he somehow survives this as well

edgebot looks exactly like omega except with more spikes. he wants revenge against shadow for besting him at Brude™️ which is why hes doing this. from this episode onward hes omegas main rival in the field of law and also theyre brothers since they were both created by eggman. M1KU is their sister. orbot and cubot are their eldest siblings. what a nice family

oh and instead of yelling "OBJECTION" each side just fires a projectile (ice cream for omega, knives for edgebot) at the other robot causing sogginess and scratch marks

all the other characters are the gallery and theyre sitting outside on the grass watching this all go down with varying degrees of attention. eggman in particular feels very conflicted because he wants to support edgebot but he doesnt want to make omega feel like the unfavorite and of course he doesnt want to root for shadows downfall either

witness 1 is dave who was standing right next to shadow when he was committing the deed and did absolutely nothing to stop him. omega gets him to recant by pelting him with ice cream nonstop and giving him hypothermia

witness 2 is amy who was at the front of the line to order when this went down and also saw everything but omega cracks her testimony by getting her to admit that shadows back was towards her at the time so she cant say for sure that was shadow. sure no one else around is a black hedgehog with red stripes but she cant prove it was him can she?

witness 3 whos infinite is mainly there to testify about shadows character and of course he starts talking so much trash about him and painting him in the worst light possible. "also those red things next to his eyes? theyre UGLY." "YOURE THE UGLY ONE YOU MASK WEARING FREAK!!!" shadow yells as he leaps from the defendants chair and tackles infinite to the floor because these two in the boomverse would be so catty you will not change my mind about this. a recess has to be called

rouge whos witness 4 is also there to establish character and shes one of the few who isnt intimidated by shadow so when asked questions about whether hes capable of doing this shes like "lol maybe idk can i go to my manipedi appointment now" (side note but shadows constantly at a loss for words when it comes to rouge precisely because of this. none of his threats ever affect her so if he cant scare her then What Else Can He Do)

eventually omega pushes everything onto sonic by saying he was disguised as shadow to frame him which is an accusation that comes out of left field because in case you werent paying attention sonic isnt involved in this incident/trial AT ALL. he was sitting in the gallery for the first half of the proceedings but grew bored so he left only to be forced to come back when hes accused. insert sa2 references here yada yada faker etc etc youre not even good enough to be my fake blah blah blah live and learn

shadow surprisingly is pretty against the direction this trial has gone because it actually really pisses him off when people imply that he and sonic look alike even when it directly benefits him but just when hes about to put his foot down and own up to the crime (omegas fun be DAMNED) fastidious beaver comes in "correcting" his grammar and everyone freaks out. especially him.

omegas disappointed that his first trial was ultimately a dud but then tw barker comes up to him and tells him hes in trouble for extortion and omega ALMOST accepts until he learns that the incident involved c/ryptocurrency

[robotnikholmescomicblog]

This crossover ends how it started: Sticks hyping up her experiences to the indifferent or traumatized Sonic Boom cast, as they’re the only ones who came out of it with their memories intact. Not like anyone really believes Sticks anyway. xD

To my knowledge, this ending was supposed to hint towards future crossovers, stating that their universes are all connected by this “Nexus“, which is a cool concept but I doubt it would have been put to good use if Archie Comics just wanted to make more huge but empty cast assembles.

That is how I’d probably rate Worlds Unite as a whole. While its certainly flashy, has talented peeps on board and gives older franchises a lot of much-needed exposure, the diminishing of character importance, the convoluted yet predictable plot, the glaringly-obvious mandates for most of the cast and the underwhelming final act make it much less enjoyable to read. The first crossover did everything waay better; World Collide was a fun time and it limiting its cast to just Sonic and Mega Man characters gave it time to showcase the awesomeness of both franchises. By comparison, Worlds Unite became too greedy and wanted ALL THE FRANCHISES, even if it had to remove most character interactions and anything else that made Worlds Collide special to begin with. If they stuck with the X and Boom characters joining that would have probably made it a better read, but the idea that Archie Comics simply HAD to make yet another universe-spanning crossover was extremely misguided, especially when you consider it did nothing to help sales and was very probably one of the reasons the company later did away with their licenced comics starring Mega Man and Sonic later on.

[boomgoestheprower]

[johnmamer]

Day 17 

 Actually, I can't handle the truth. 

*Curls up into a ball*

[yourfaveisaneggfuccker]

Fastidious Beaver from Sonic Boom is an eggfucker!

[seasalt84]

Day 2 of Sonictober, themed “Costume”.

Some say the casino had record profits that day. I'll be waiting by the phone, Sonic Boom writers. P: 

[lightningblade1994-blog]

07/19/2023

Masahito Fujiwami: Y'know, Fastidious. I think I'll donate a million pounds to the local orphanage...when pigs fly ^^ [Both Fastidious and Masahito start to chuck but is interrupted as Super Sonic flies by them, leaving them both dumbfounded and confused] Fastidious Beaver: Will you be donating the million pounds now, sir? Masahito Fujiwami: No, I'd still prefer not.

[sonic-takes]

(Fastidious Beaver voice) it's actually "danganronpa"

daganpoopa

[themurderofsonic-knockout]

Please reblog for a larger voting pool

Propaganda under the cut

Gerald Robotnik:

bro messes around with forces beyond his comprehension and expects not to be struck down for his hubris smh

Fastidious Beaver:

Someone will murder him just because of getting done with his "Actually, it's *insert corrected term*" nonsense. He also said that his greatest strength is his incredible cowardice

All Propaganda has been submitted

[sonicboomseason3]

sonic boom season 3 ep where its groundhog day and usually fastidious beaver is the "groundhog" but he broke his leg this year so they get shadow to do it instead because... shadows. and also they do it without him knowing because he wouldve said no and beat someone up if they asked him directly

anyway shadow emerges from his cave that apparently isnt even his cave according to alan denton :///// and doesnt see his shadow which usually means an early spring but instead a thunderstorm starts rolling in and so the villagers get the bright idea to form a mob and ambush shadow in the hopes that itll clear the weather and team sonic has to save the day. except like... theyre mainly doing it to save the villagers from impending doom, not shadow. dear g*d dont let shadow find out what they did hell bash their skulls in

it culminates in a standoff in front of the cave that isnt actually shadows and theyre all yelling back and forth at each other and shadow just wants everyone to shut up so he starts throwing rocks at both sides

[robotnikholmescomicblog]

The Maverick Hunters bumping into the crazy Sticks? Funny as hell, especially with the Boom inhabitants being unaccustomed to the seriousness of X and the gang.

Sticks realising she’s gonna be a part of a grand adventure and dragging Comedy Chimp and Fastidious Beaver along with her as fourth-wall breaking sidekicks? Hilarious!

Having to put up with their humour and quips in later issues where the only joke is that they don’t belong in a crossover fight? Not as funny.