#cannot believe this may go through im praying for all of you

[hailthegodsong]

i’m not one to get political + i’m not even american, but reading this is actually scary asf

and to think people are getting mad at josh for saying “love is blue” cause they don’t agree he should be promoting anti-trump messages when this is the reality for him if trump gets in

“Loss of protection in healthcare” — WHAT?!

[11queensupreme11]

Im sorry but WHAT are these ancient fucking laws I keep reading about in so many percy jackson fics 😭😭 I read the books a long time ago, so I don't remember it, but I thought it was just a fanon thing to explain why the gods are neglectful?

OKAY IM REALLY GLAD YOU ASKED THIS CUZ YOU'RE NOT ALONE

ive seen so many comments in arsenic blues from ppl who believe that ALL the gods are being WILLINGLY neglectful towards their kids, and that is NOT true.

the ancient laws are a canon thing in pjo. it's been mentioned many many times, but through scattered discussion. here's a list of dialogues that talk/mention it (the quotes were taken from this helpful reddit post btw)

example 1:

"Do not judge the Lord of the Sea too harshly," the Nereid told me. “He stands at the brink of an unwanted war. He has much to occupy his time. Besides, he is forbidden to help you directly. The gods may not show such favouritism.” “Even to their own children?” “Especially to them. The gods can work by indirect influence only. That is why I give you a warning, and a gift.”

example 2:

“Permission to kill, my lady?” I couldn’t tell who she was talking to, because she kept her eyes on the manticore. The monster wailed. ‘This is not fair! Direct interference! It is against the Ancient Laws.”

example 3:

"Why show yourself now?" Luke demanded. His shoulders were tense, as if he expected a fight. "All these years I've been calling to you, praying you'd show up, and nothing. You left me with her." He pointed toward the kitchen like he couldn't bear to look at his mother, much less say her name. "Luke, do not dishonor her," Hermes warned. "Your mother did the best she could. As for me, I could not interfere with your path. The children of the gods must find their own way."

example 4:

“Luke, I care very much,’ Hermes said slowly, ‘but gods must not interfere directly in mortal affairs. It is one of our Ancient Laws. Especially when your destiny ...” His voice trailed off.

example 5:

My heart sank. Chiron was right, but it was all we could muster. For once I wished Dionysus were here, but even if he had been, I didn’t know if he could have done anything. When it came to war, gods were forbidden to interfere directly. Apparently, the Titans didn’t believe in restrictions like that.

example 6:

Hermes readjusted the mailbag on his shoulder. ‘Percy, the hardest part about being a god is that you must often act indirectly, especially when it comes to your own children. If we were to intervene every time our children had a problem ... well, that would only create more problems and more resentment.

example 7:

“Besides, even if the other gods suspect Hades – and I imagine Poseidon does – they couldn’t retrieve the bolt themselves. Gods cannot cross each other’s territories except by invitation. That is another ancient rule. Heroes, on the other hand, have certain privileges. They can go anywhere, challenge anyone, as long as they’re bold enough and strong enough to do it. No god can be held responsible for a hero’s actions. Why do you think the gods always operate through humans?”

example 8:

"Now, a god cannot usurp another god's symbol of power directly-that is forbidden by the most ancient of divine laws. But Zeus believes your father convinced a human hero to take it."

don't get me wrong, there are gods who couldn't care less about their kids and willingly neglect them, but it's veeeery wrong to believe that ALL the gods are like this. it's canon that gods cannot interfere in their children's lives, even if they want to. they don't neglect their kids because they don't care about them, they do it because they don't have a choice.

hermes and luke's relationship shows this perfectly. hermes IS a good dad (he's actually one of the best imo). he knew what luke's fate would be and TRIED to change it even though everyone knew it would be impossible, but he was desperate anyway because he loved his son and wanted to try and save him.

unfortunately, every attempt to change his fate always failed (because duh, can't change fate): he sent luke on a quest to "build him up as a hero" only for luke to fail and get a scar, asked percy and annabeth to save him, but they failed too (he even snapped at annabeth for failing to go with his son).

sooo yeah! like i said, there are some godly parents that willingly neglect their kids because they don't care about them, but that's not the case for every single god. there ARE gods who care about their kids, they're just forbidden to interact with them, and that means they can't raise them either.

[mydahliarose]

Dollhouse of joy 🪽🃏

Pairing: Michael x niiri Michael x demon oc

Trope: forbidden lovers angel x demon

Fandom: what in hell is bad?

Tag: angst with fluff, comfort, hurt, playful teasing, no smut,soft intimacy, doctor and patient roleplay,mentions of my other ocs briefly, wholesome

Synopsis: niiri attempts to pray but hurts herself in the process in doing so to see her worth of becoming an angel. Michael has his paranoia moment aswell so niiri hatches an idea when Michael offers to be alone together she takes him to her domain that's a dollhouse in the form of Michaels most happiest place, his old room.

Nothing but empty silence filled the cathedral at night. Well all accept for niiri's presence, kneeling in the statue of god and his angels surrounding him. Such a rare and unusual sight to see a demon be dedicated to God, because she truly believes she could be an angel in heaven and finally leave demonhood behind her. Oh niiri...god has abandoned his angels wondering where on earth he is, while still retaining there intense devotion for him as they attack and kill devils aswell as the descendants of solomon. There is nothing to do in heaven besides love god to the fullest. You must be truly divine or else a cruel fate shall come if you dare defy. She remembered what Michael said that night in his birthday " are you willing to go through such trials?" Was niiri willing to go through such psychological torture of it all and go as insane as these angels have become? Sure she was already not all the in the head but heavens trials would break her just as its done to her dearest angelica. Oh sweet Michael...

" our father-ngh! w-ho a-rt agh! I-in heaven-s-shit! I can do it..."

Demons cannot say the Bible verse. holy things are considered a weakness for the demons. if they even dare try to finish it the consequences are Burns to blistering the pain is so excruciating it feels as if theyll ash away and die. The doll demon knowing of this contenued on, all it took was repeating Michaels words again and again while her heart raced thinking of him.

" h-hollowed b-be thy name! T-thy kingdom c-come,! T-thy will b-be AH! Done!

She hissed in pain, her bisque doll skin cracking as her flesh is now bare making the burn excruciating, damaging some of her nerves.

"o-on e-earth as it i-is heaven...g-give us this day our... our?" Her body grew weak drastically, she needed to stop or else she will pass out. Shed be lucky if it where the two exorcists who managed to trust her shed get lucky and theyll put her to rest, but if it where another? Shed be done.

"and forgive us... o-our...a-as we forgive... forgive...

"please forgive me father..."

"im sorry i was born imperfect..."

Her body rocking back and forth, already at her limit of her wounds that she would crash headfirst at front. Her body may heal but her fragile mind was another story, this was her attempt to show herself to the skies she was worthy she knew her prayers and she blew it. Or so she believes that herself, or maybe they truly did see her unworthy. An unworthy unclean imperfect demon who shouldn't be allowed to touch the gates to heaven.

She shakingly lifts herself, back into her kneeling position even in defeat there was a spark still glowing within her. Holding her hands together closing her eyes taking deep breaths.

"our father who art in heaven!"

She roared her prayers until she was heard i will be heard!. Please god, one chance was all she ever wanted.

" hollowed by thy name! Thy Kingdom come! Thy will be done!."

I am niiri! Hear me now! Ive massacred my kind for this moment! Im no demon im an angel! God please fix me to your image!

A traitor to her kind now, all those memories in hades where nothing but a locked trunk stuffed in an attic.

" On earth as it is In heaven. Give us this day our daily bread!"

I promise you and your angels im one of you...

Bring her light, give her the most beautiful wings, the most brightest of all halos so that shed feel like a princess walking down her kingdom as the angels welcome her in open arms.

"and forgive us our tresspasses, as we forgive those who tresspassagaints us.

Open your gates and let me in....

Please give her a chance and look her way to see for yourself...

"and lead us not into temptation, b-but d-deliver us from evil!

Let me in so i can feel complete!

So to feel humanlike, In this doll body while there was life within herself wasnt enough, she hoped to morph into a proper angelic body to truly feel herself.

"f-for tine is the kingdom..a-and the g-glory..."

So i can...

And then she looked up weakly to the statue of a familiar war angel of justice next to god and a tear ran down her cheek.

So that i may be able to be with Michael without the reprocussions....

That's what i want more than anything god...let me..let me-.

" NIIRI! "a voice so beautiful yet a hint of authority in there tone echoed the cathedral. She turned and her eyes widened, Michael. Shed struggle to stand on her own, the smell of something that's been left burning on a stove waved through the seraphs nose. Eye twitching, he stormed over immediately to stop her from doing something that felt almost suicidal. He had been listening the entire time, that niiri so into her prayer didnt hear the entrance door open. Looking at her in this state set something off in him, it felt almost to familiar...

" Angelica?" She said as Michael lifted her up full force as if he didnt want her kneeling down any longer.

"get up now!" He said in raged, why does she bother doing this to herself? Its completely pointless and dangerous she should know better! He thought to himself. He didnt want to admit it but he was beginning to get concerned for her well bieng. But then niiri moved her hand away.

"no, i was about to get it right this time! God was finally going to see my worth! Im finally going go get my wi-" she was then abruptly stopped by Michaels words.

" you cant." Just that word alone you could hear splitting crack coming from her heart almost. "

" but...b-but if god can forgive and all then surley he can forgive me for bieng born a demon...an imper- Michael placed his hand onto her mouth to stop her from saying that word. " Don't you even dare finish that sentence!". All filthy demons are imperfect, that go againts gods will, and thus deserve a painful death. but with niiri, he just couldnt think of doing that to her; atleast not anymore, not ever since his pure heart began to sing love songs in a beat everytime he thinks of her. my sweet niiri...she was perfect to him. So perfect, that he hadn't realized how shakingly he had became when he saw her at her limit all the things that made her beautiful where vanishing from her burns. It knotted his heart so much he just wanted to kiss her pain away...

"Michael?" She muffled. hands still covering her mouth that it made him snap out of it immediately he had forgotten he was inside a church which ment...

Oh no oh no has god heard all his filthy adoration to his demoness crush through his inner thoughts?! Has he perhaps heard his heart beat rapidly when he laid eyes on her?! He must have heard everything! Goodness was Michael begining to grow scared, Nausea coming through the roof with an aching headache. Immediately he takes his hand off her and jumps back looking at her as if he had seen a ghost. God...why couldnt you have turned her into an angel.

" d-dont...dont ever say that word again..." He said with a shaky voice, face begining to sweat as he pressed his fingers on his throbbing head.

"....you mean imperfect?" It finally clicked " you mean...i am perfect? Just the way i am?." She tilted her head waiting for a response.

Oh, why does she have to look at him with such cute but deadly stare? Only making it difficult for him to not defy his precious god. He tried to look away, to bad for him he accidentally moved his eye to the corner to look at her. Ahh her white painted makeup with her rosey blush truly matched the lights of the skies. She was the perfect ang- no...she is a demon and she must accept that the holy land would never truly see her as divine. Theyd kill her if they had the chance once she's defensless.

"niiri..." his eyes look up to the statue of god before looking back at her.

"tck... enough with this make believe act! You are a demon! No angel would look down and see you as one of them! You can pray all you want but your only going to contenue hurting yourself in the process!" There was a small menace laughter that felt more of emotional pain than anything, pain of there forbidden relationship." Now look at you! Your all blisters and cracks! When will you open your eyes niiri?!"

Did it hurt to hear? Absolutely. but was it ever more painful because it came from Michaels words? One hundred percent. this was his paranoia talking she had to keep that in mind as to not feel this way. the problem was she to suffer from her own malady of delusions that makes her difficult to stay compose.

" you dont know that! Maybe itll just take time is all! Not tomarrow but any year or more! Maybe i just have to try harder in our executions to be seen as a potential devine bieng!."

The seraphs rolls his eyes letting out an annoyed sigh. Walking towards her he places two hands on her shoulder, gripping them but not to tight as to not worsen her wounds. They seem to have began slowly healing now.

" enough! Theres no chance in you becoming an angel niiri its facts! Thats why god dosent respond to you! Thats why no angels have come to your aide-

It was niiris turn to cut him off now. " You did Michael...you heard my prayer back then in the circus operation mission that you where sent to originally exterminate me remember?"

Immediately Michaels eyes widen. That was the first time they had properly met, thou it was his teammate exorcist that convinced him her words where true to keep her by there side. He thought he'd regret it but in the end it was a huge turn of events in his life, and dare he say something hes always wanted deep down, love.

" i-i did..."he says as niiri cups his face, growing tense at her touch god he wanted more of this from her...

Hesitantly he holds her, tears flowed from his two beautiful eyes. Then Michael says something he thought hed never say.

" why has god forsaken you such fate? Why couldnt he have made you an angel..."

He tilts his head to her palm, nuzzling it as he close his eyes leaving it sweet kisses despite the fear of bieng watched looming around him.

"if you where an angel...things wouldnt be as complicated..."

Niiri moved his beautiful face touching hers, lips nearly touching if she wanted she could have kissed him right then and there.

" i am an angel"

" i am your perfect angel from hell..."

" and you are my perfect angel from heaven~" there was a flirterous manner in her last sentence.

Oh that honeysuckle voice, so doll like yet seductive left a shiver running down his spine.

" my angel..."

Eyes closed, thinking about tasting her sweet midnight lips not caring if it smeared all over his glossy lips ahh the temptation...

But Michael leaned to her ear instead to whisper something.

"lets do this somewhere more privately where we can be ourselves dear."

Oh what a little tease he was, niiri couldn't help but giggle. Finally the tension was fading away and they could let loose together.

"Of course my beautiful white swan~"

She lets go of his beautiful face to offer him to hold her hand, She hatched an idea.

" place your hand in mine, and think about your most favorite place to be alone with me in."

Michael looks at her in curiosity, but nonetheless he does what hes told. He closes his eyes and takes deep breathes, in and out concentrating of his most treasured place. somewhere to be safe and sound with his demoness. Although he couldn't see anything, he felt a small gust of wind woosh over him. Somethings changed.

"now open your eyes."

When he opened them, he was awestruck this couldn't be...

"niiri... this is my-

She smiled then in her joyus state taking over,she gives Michael a big warm hug. Using her strength she lifted him up that his toes where barley touching the ground. Face blushing mixed between the emotions of love and disbelief at what he is just witnessing in his surrounding.

" surprise! This is my domain expansion the dollhouse!, well technically this is your version of it for now." The room was in pastel colors, glow in the dark stars lighting the dim room. The most extraordinary detail, was the ground that was made entirely out of clouds, thankfully they where walkable. This familiar room held so much memories for Michael that he couldn't help but shed tears.

" ahhh my sweetest Dolly of mine, you always know how to sooth this seraphs sadness away..."

He brushed her long front strand of hair away to kiss her forehead. A thank you gift for her. Although happy memories linger here, it also held something he couldnt let go, lucifer hyung. His face from joy slowly began to fade, luckily niiri caught this and tilted his chin up to look at her.

" no no no! This is exactly why i brought you here, so that we could make new fondful memories here! I know that your pscyhe still cant let go of the painful events that happend between you two. But i promise you, if you let yourself distract away from your worries and god, you will have the time of your life here!. This place is safe away from all that my dear" she says with all her endearment. If Michael is sad then shes sad and that only makes her more determined to help him heal from all his trauma. Locking into her loving eyes as she spoke Michael couldnt help but chuckle. Ahh much better sight.

"with you here, i already feel safe." He pats her head before bieng released from her long hug.

"now angelica~ since this is your playtime session with yours truly, what do you suggest we play together today?" She waited for his response.

Oh he gets to decide? How very thoughtful of her, there was just so many to decide! Lets see, play with the toys in his old boxes? Maybe not just yet, hide and seek? No not feeling it. Then he remembered niiris wounds again, they'll healed better now but still he wished to nurture her from her pain- wait that's it!.

" hmm, i think i want to play doctor with you my dear, and you will be my patient." He said with confidence. Niiri gasps dramatically at his request.

" you just read through my mind! Hehe maybe ill get a turn to treat you later?" She twirled her hair around.

" ahhh perhaps if my patient behaves well at her checkup ill consider it~" he teased with playfullness. Finally he felt like he could let loose here without the real world interfering with his mindset.

He went to look around for a futon mattress for her to lay, oh my goodness Michael has never felt this excitement in a good long time until now, oh how he longer missed this energy.

" come now and lay here while i check your pulse then ill be doing a body checkup". He tapped on the mattress to signal her.

Niiri jumped and plopped down, thank goodness it didn't break from her strength. " Im ready casanov- i mean doctor! *Cough* im sooo sick! Please help me figure out whats wrong!." She dramatically places her hand on her forhead as if she was in dire need of help.

" oh heavens, it seems we have a code blue on our hands!, here let me immediately check your pulse". Michael took a hold of her palm, putting his middle and index fingers at her wrist from the bottom of her finger. He listened closely, using some of his angelic powers to make her veins visible through his light.

"your heart beat seems to be in good health." Badump " hm? It seems you are suddenly beating rapidly i wonder..."

Even if it was just roleplay, watching Michael enjoy himself in this doctor scenario of taking care of his demon lover she couldnt help but skip a beat. So cute, so caring he wanted more of this.

" i think ill have to check your hearts pulse just to make sure" oh she was done for.

"o-oh well the stethoscope is over t-" she was stopped by Michaels sudden closeness to her chest.

" no, i think ill just listen to it myself. What of it's faulty? We cant have that now can we?" Like hell hed let this opportunity slide to make her melt through his needy charms.

" oh- hehehe... ah i see, why use a tool when my most perfect doctor is right here to do it himself? How silly of me to suggest it in the first place~." So warm she felt.

" that's a good girl, now stay still for me will you? " Niiri nodded and that was his signal to lay his head on her chest. He didnt dare move, carefully listening to her heartbeat...badump! Badump! .

"Niiri! Good gracious! Your heartbeat has gotten faster! What have you taken any caffeine this morning? Perhaps anxiety?".

Niiri shook her head, she couldn't even look at him. "N-no!"

" hmm then maybe, could it be..." He jolted his head up to niiris face suddenly now seeing a bashful niiri trying to hide her face.

" aha! I diagnose you with lovesickness! Oh how adorable!." He pinches her cheeks very slightly before tapping her nose with his finger. " Niiri my dolly~ please keep making that beautiful noise from your heart for me everday will you~?" He cooed.

" ack! Haha! Oooh Michael cakes this heart will always pump for you~, especially with how good your doctor role is im for certain its going to combust soon!" A snort coming from him as he rubs her shoulder.

" remind me to prescribe you some medications ok?"

She mimics her hand to sound like its talking " yeah yeah doctor~" she was about to stood up until Michael stopped her. "Ahem, i don't think i said your appointment is finished yet? I still have to check around more." Her eyes widen, where on earth is he going to check now.

" o-oh doctor where else do i need a check up?" She said as Michael crosses his arms.

" i need to check all over your body to examine all your burns from earlier..." He looked at her with concern.

Oh he still hadnt forgotten about that...

" oh right...its already healed from regeneration, but you are the doctor and i won't stop you from doing so then~". He really cared for her this much.

" good, im glad you understand. Now sit up." She does just that, she was also kind enough to unbutton her shirt for him.

Now Michael got a taste of his own medicine, as he began to feel warm inside his face redder than any cherries seen.

" a-alright...lets examine these healed spots now shall we?" He picked up one of her arms, moving it towards him to see and sure enough theyve healed. Tsk...if only god hadnt interrupted back there in the church he would have tended to her wounds.

"doctor..." Michael was listening to her.

" do my wounds still need to be healed?" He only nodded, but as healed as her outer layer was he could still see a tiny scaring needing to go away. So with his gentle lips he kissed it, one single kiss was all it took for it to go away with a golden light resembling little fireflies almost. The kiss of an angel is the most divine healing in all of existence.

He trailed his lips up to her upper arm, showering every consequences of her actions away with his purity. It didnt stop there, from her shoulder he'd kiss her upper back. He imagined what it be like if she had wings, oh how he'd always take a chance to nuzzle in between them, stroking them to watch them flutter as shes always done to his. He kissed there more that it left niiri to shiver down.

"a-ah! Ahh i see...,you got bothered by the fact that you couldnt tend to me at my worst state because of God. So you took this opportunity to make up for it yes?."

Michael did not respond he was to focused on showering her body with all his light.

"mmhm...~" he mumbled, her body now in a much better state thanks to him. Not before one last peck on her cheek.

" ahh there we go much better now~, it would seem your appointment is finally finished." If only it lasted longer but alas he wanted to give niiri her turn. Now hed be the one to play patient and immediately he took no time to switch his role.

"cough! O-oh no! I think i caught your love sickness~ i feel feverish..doctor dolly i need you to hold me~ " he falls so dramatically into her arms, his expression really gave off as if he looked weak and sluggish. Nuzzling onto her chest for comfort, hes so freaking cute she thought to herself.

" OH NO! We need all the angel numbers for a miracle to save you! " Carrying him bridal style she runs to the toy boxes, seeking to find some plastic medical equipments and wala! A thermometer just exactly what she needed.

"alright angelica open wide im going to check your temperature ok?" She says in the most nurturing care tone. as she places her other hand onto his forhead, Pretending as if hes actually burning up.

" ahh..." He obliges into her care as the tool was placed closing his mouth awaiting to see his temperature.

" ok lets see now... GASPS! 113?! Oh my goodness! was my lovesick so contagious that you couldn't resist me? Well no wonder you got it bad! Tsk tsk" she teases him.

" ahh doctor you caught me~ now look at me, needing your assistance to cure me cough! Oh whateeever shall you do my sweets?" He curls up closer to her, his attention seeking growing stronger as they contenue to play make believe.

" hmm, well sweety it seems we have no cure for this lovesickness you and i suffer from". Gently plays with his hair " although... Is it bad as a doctor to wish there never is a cure to this?." A soft chuckle escapes her lips.

Michael ponders at the thought then remembering her heartbeat whenever he does something for her Lovingly. Even he himself chuckled at the thought.

" you know what? Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad after all.." he smiles. " I wish wed always fall for eachother like this even in different timelines..." How sweet of him to say thought niiri. A life in different times with the same lover? How beautiful.

" but what if love sickness kills us?" Silence and then he speaks " my dearest, this is supposed to be a realm of joy yes? Lets keep it that way please?" He made a puppy face that niiri could not resist.

" ahh ok ok! Oh no patient your fever is getting high! Oh i know!" She lays him gently, running to find something that would similarly look like medicine. She searched around the boxes again until she found a fake vintage doll medicine bottle, crossing her fingers hoping there was something edible in here shake, ok there's something in here now lets open it. Pop, oh! There's little candys here, yes this will work splendidly.

" sorry i took so long starlight! Now come into my arms again"~ immediately pulls him close then smothers his forhead with kisses.

" take these pills that I'm prescribing you dear, take one now then the other later ok?" Takes a candy out of the toy pill bottle that's a shape of a star.

" chew " she commands, he leans his head up taking the dessert slowly chewing it down so he can get rid of this fake fever.

" ahh i think ill feel better soon knowing my doctor is so nurturing of me~ actually doctor if it isnt to much to ask...can you rock me back and forth? Id think thatll help me relax a bit in your care.." niiri smiles.

" this is your dollhouse domain and so it shall be requested, nothing is to much to ask in order to feel joy in this realm remember that Angelica~" ruffling his hair, she moves her body back and forth. Humming a bit as she stares into the stars and he watches her.

" this has been the most fun ive ever had in a long time, i wish it never ended..." He sighs.

" then how about we play one more game? We can play here as long as we need to!"

Michael smiles as he thinks. " Patty cake?

" i love that game! Cmon sit in front of me then." Michael releases from her hold as he positions himself to clap her hands.

" ready?" She says with glee

" niiri, im always ready~" he said with confidence.

And so niiri started the rhythm " pat-a- cake! Pat-a-cake! Bakers a man bake me a cake as fast as you can! " The pace speeds up, both lovers managing to keep up the pace as the ryhme repeats again.

"Pat it and roll it with an M." Wait shouldnt it be the letter B? Michael thought to himself

" then put it in the oven..."suddenly niiri snatches Michaels wrist, pulling him up close to lock his lips onto hers. Hand slithering up to cup his face, moving it from behind to caress his feathers. They flap through excitement, a muffled moan of surprise escapes his luchious mouth as eyes lock wide.

"mmmff?!" She chuckles in his lips before slowly releasing him " for Michael and Me~..." He was left utterly speechless beyond belief, he lifted his fingers as to feel his wet lips. He could taste sugar in those lips, addicting as his love for her is.

" n-niiri..." Now he looked utterly lovesick for real this time, no rolepay this time. He felt dizzy and woozy in the best way possible.

" i need you.." he wraps his arm around her pulling her even close to him that she has no chances of escaping. He wanted everything of her. " Mmf! M-michael~" she muffled.

While Michael continued to have a taste, niiri focused on showing affection to his wing, her favorite part of him. Moving he hand back and forth until sharp gasps escapes, winged feather switching more and more through her action.

" you mean everything to me, more than anything in the world.. that's why if i where to miraculously become an angel, id win there approval to be with you..."

It all made sense to Michael now, he stopped the kiss but not caressing her.

" my angel, you do not need there approval because i your angel from the heavens already approve of this forbidden relationship please Remember that." He kisses her again and even more passionate this time not caring if he loses his breathe. " I need you niiri..my beloved antique doll~" he began to cry a single tear then another streamed down his golden eye. His other eye seemed to be doing the same aswell. He was very emotional in this moment.

" your to kind to me my love..." Then she to began to cry, then something Michael does leaves her speechless. He pulls a feather from his wing, eye twitched from the Small pinch sensation putting it between her ear. " Michael...your own feather?"

He gives a genuine smile." that is your wing my dear, a reminder that you are my angel always..." He moves to the crook of her neck where he placed his feather to nuzzle her new set of wing like he's always wanted to, even if it was just a feather itll do.

Niiri returned the same gesture aswell, biding her face where his wing was tears of joy glistening down his pastel white shirt. But he didn't mind.

" your the only one who sees me for who i am... thank you."

Thats how they spend the rest of there hours, alone together sharing emotional intimacy moments while playing more. They wanted to be together in the dollhouse domain, not ready to once again face the challenges of bieng together out on earth hell and heaven.

it had to happen soon.

End

Angel dividers by @/Chocoperrito

Star divider by @/dwaintydoll

Blue sparkle divider by @/anitalenia

[birdybirdvillagetown]

Children Of God and Everyone

We have to stop escusing the enemy of attacking our God the father. We have to defend christ as christ has defended us. Though we defend him with truth. We have to rebuke the enemy in the name of Jesus christ. Were in the middle of a spiritual war. Not a fleshly war but a spiritual one. We cannot let the enemy drag us down with him. Yes do we respect him, yes but do we fear him, no. Though do we as christians and as children of God Let Satan attack our father with lies and deceit, no no we dont. Its time all of us I mean everyone else and all of us to stand up for whats right.

We should not let the enemy oppress us any longer. If he speaks lies about our Father we speak truth back. We do it with the truth of God and his word. We have to honour our father. Not to be ashamed of him.

Show the enemy we are not ashamed of God. Show him were not ashamed of Jesus christ. Show him were not ashamed of the holy spirit. Show him with Honour and dignity and holyness that we will defend God's word and him.

Children of God if God is behind us then why should we fear the enemy. Why should we? We shouldn't. Yes satan can attack us physically, mentally and emotionally. Though we have God on our side. We rebuke the enemies attacks especially attacks from the demonic.

We have Jesus on our side. We have the holy spirit on our side. Though the one thing he cannot attack is our soul. Im not saying we should underestimate him. Im saying we should not fear him. God has already won this war. Though as children of God we have the right to defend our Father in heaven.

We have to put up the armour of God and put up the shield of faith. To also put the helmet of salvation on. The devil may throw doubt your way but you tell him you rebuke him. God has given us the gift and power to rebuke our enemies. I promise you though if you do not take a step and say no to satan he will come into your life and make it a living hell.

Thats what satan does if you give him an inch he will take a mile. He will fill you with so much despair and hatred and anger and depression. That you will become defeated and fall into his trap. Then that means you go to him then our father which is wrong. We should not choose satan over God. We as children of God, should choose God and God only, not other things. Thats what the devil does tells us we can choose other options instead of God but that is a deceitful lie. Though as christians or anyone else who believes in God we should not let that happen.

Instead of saying yes to satan we need to say no to him. If we continue to rebuke him and rebuke his lies and tell him no he will eventually flee from us.

Him and God are not on the same playing field. So many people have said that satan and God are equal, that is not the truth God is much more powerful than satan.

It saddens me to see so many people fall into his trap and so many of our brethren to fall into his trap. Though I trust that with God's truth and words they will come back to him. I pray that they will find there way back.

Here are bible verses that many should be reminded.

Psalm 3-8

Lord, how many are my foes!

How many rise up against me!

2 Many are saying of me,

“God will not deliver him.a”b

3 But you, Lord, are a shieldb around me,

my glory, the One who lifts my head high.c

4 I call out to the Lord,d

and he answers me from his holy mountain.e

5 I lie down and sleep;f

I wake again,g because the Lord sustains me.

6 I will not fearh though tens of thousands

assail me on every side.i

7 Arise,j Lord!

Deliver me,k my God!

Strikel all my enemies on the jaw;

break the teethm of the wicked.

8 From the Lord comes deliverance.n

May your blessingo be on your people.

Psalm 5:8

Lead me, O LORD, in thy righteousness because of mine enemies; make thy way straight before my face.

Psalm 7:10

My shield is with God, who saves the upright in heart

Psalm 23:4

Even though I walk

through the darkest valley,[a]

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and your staff,

they comfort me.

Amen.

[the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see]

drop the lore for your song !

(insert "sorry i put this in drafts and immediately forgot about it" cake here. sorry i put this in drafts and immediately forgot about it!!!)

okay so first i guess we should probably drop the lyrics, theyre on bandlab but also who give a shit. here you go:

-and you sit there like youre some starry-eyed god

asking for sacrifice, knowing what i lost

and what can i do but follow you?

i made you my temple, just follow through

and your honor, you sit and stare as i stand witness

to this man burning everything i love down with this building

and from the ashes his eyelash comes falling, i make a wish

it wont ever come true but ill make him pray it did

and god, my god i would follow you to death

you know this so you hold a blunt knife to my neck

i am more than just your satisfactions and regrets

but you are less than i thought, you are less and you're not even worth it

i am breathing just a little and calling it a life

you are walking in the wild with a mass market knife

and it feels so juvenile to talk it all through

we are teenagers at battle, we are always coming true

HOW DOES IT FEEL TO KNOW YOU COULD NOT HAVE SAVED ME?

AND DO YOU BELIEVE IN EVERYTHING YOU SEE ON THE NEWS

CAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW BY NOW THAT ALL KIDS DO IS LOSE EVENTUALLY.

I HATE THAT YOU COULDNT SAVE ME.

that must mean im stronger.

you said you would protect me.

but im like ocean water.

and youre like twenty three!

so i choose now between honesty and dignity

and i cannot worship a god i cant believe

yeah i tore my palms down your altar

for war, blood must taste sweet

i dont know what to do to make you believe that im insane

you made me, made me you, made me who i am

no you didnt make me, i made me, you were just a tool

ill say anything so ill sleep the whole night through

first piece of lore: i did in fact write this in tumblr drafts. people tend to not believe me when i tell them but notes app is far too open. tumblr drafts is for the arteries. also the sense of danger from my drafts being cleared or my account being deleted (which happened) keeps me on my toes.

second piece of lore: this is less of a song and more of a conglomeration of words i thought go together good. i didnt really have a plan for this as i was writing it, it sort of formed the image and story it has as i wrote and only when i was "done" (the song isnt complete but im done writing it for now) did i have it completely. my sister said the phrase "starry-eyed god" and i ran from there! i was kind of toying with the idea of being hurt by someone who doesnt really believe they are harming you, and sort of falling across that line all the time of are they really innocent or are they playing innocent.

i also liked the idea of being so in love with someone that you'd worship them, not understanding that that isnt love, its obsession. lots of misunderstandings and insanity in this bad boy.

this is also definitely the ending half of the song. in my recording the end is a little fucked because, third piece of lore, i accidentally slammed my hand on the table out of passion and spent the rest of the song trying not to cry in pain. why did i push through, you may ask. why didnt i just stop and rerecord in a minute. well im something of an artiste (idiot)

that bit on "what can i do but follow you/i made you my temple just follow through" where im high and singing almost reverently is what i want more of the beginning to sound like. for this section we have more of those divine chorus vibes peeking through every once in a while, so the beginning will have this almost spoken desperate vibe peeking through, but majority of that high angel voice for most of it.

okay this is already long so im gonna stop here with general lore -- if you want me to go through the lyrics as well and talk about that, i am more than happy to!! lyrics are my favorite parts of a song, especially writing-wise, so i would love that actually. some of the lyrics in this are inspired by poetry so its pretty fun to look back and see.

thank you for asking!! i love you sm <33

[anything-but-predictable]

For the past few months my level of anxiety had been sky rocketing high.

Received the result of my cervical biopsy today which thank God came back negative for CA. Apparently, abnormal cell growth was detected during my cervical screening on November last year and my GP referred me to a Gyne specialist for further review and got diagnosed with CIN 3 or high Grade 0 cervical dysplasia which if left untreated can eventually lead to cancer.

Fuck me, I was overwhelmed with fear right at that moment when I was told by my Gyne specialist. God knows how much I am praying na sana even at my late 30s I could still conceive. Right there and then, on my own, I was told that I have to undergo LLETZ (large loop electrical excision) procedure where a large loop wire has to be inserted in the cervix to remove the abnormal cells and I’m not kidding when I tell you that it was bloody painful despite of 4 shots of regional anesthesia. I fainted and literally felt my heart pounding. But if I won’t be able to tolerate the procedure then I will be booked for OR table which I really don’t want as it would make me feel that it’s officially major. I remember biting my lips so hard during the whole procedure. I told the Dr that I wanna do it right away coz there’s no point on delaying if it needs to be done anyway and I just want to get over it. So it was done and the excised specimen was sent to lab for biopsy, which took painstakingly looong.

Three things na iniisip isip ko after that. First, my main concern is kung papaano ko sasabihin sa parents and sister ko if say I have cancer, I feel like I could easily process and accept it than them. It will break their hearts and that I’m not really sure if I can handle. We have lost one of our sister when I was a teenager and I don’t even want to relive what we went through after we lost her. My parent’s just don’t deserve to go through that pain and agony again in their life.

Second is, I feel bad for myself coz I am praying so hard na sana I would still be capable of conceiving in the future, honestly I don’t know when. I try to remind myself na di pwedeng just because I’m kind of desperate to have a baby is kung sino sino na lang. My children cannot choose their father but I can, not that Im saying Im perfect but hell no Im not nor nowhere near that but, I know what I deserve and as well as for my future children. I want to experience motherhood and seeing my children grow up and be a hands-on mum.

Third and last is Im grateful that Im insured, and that healthcare in the UK is free. Like literally you go in the hospital penniless but no worries at all dahil ni pence wala kang babayaran maski chemo, radiation or whatever therapies or even surgery that you have to undergo. How I wish na ganito din tayo sa Pinas. ☹️ Also, Grabe pala yung feeling pag insured ka, I didn’t realize how important it is not until I was almost get diagnose with Cancer. I mean if anything happens, the least among all the worries my family have to think about is money because I’m covered. It’s literally a security blanket considering that I am the 🥖 winner in the family.

I cant help not to overthink during that time. Ikaw ba naman kaya ang nearly diagnose to have CA. Inisip ko na ayoko magalit kay Lord because, as cliché as it sounds, I believed that everything happens for a reason, whatever it may be, hindi man natin maintindihan right at that moment, but eventually along the way, life unfolds itself. And I always tell sa lahat ng prayers ko na kahit ano pa man yun will ni Lord no matter how painful it could be, I know He knows better than I do, kaya dun ako. Let thy will be done. 🙏🏻

Quite a long read but yeah, my heart is full. ✨

[b-124a-p-224]

Hi! I just wanted to say you're my favorite B.A.P blog & I'm so glad & proud that there are people like you in our fandom, babyz like you make me so genuinely happy!! Also with all the stuff going on, you've remained so sweet & informative to other babyz which is amazing. I always pray I & all babyz have the chance to meet the guys one day but I pray you specifically get to meet them too because I know they would appreciate your support so much

HI there cutie pie! Oh my goodness this is absolutely the most adorable and precious ask I have ever received! (*≧∀≦*) I’m so so thankful that you enjoy my blog and that you’re in this fandom as well!! I don’t even know what to say because I’m just so touched by your message, I had to put my laptop down and just hide under my covers for a sec because this is just too cute of a message haha!~ ♡ I sincerely wish and pray that you are also able to meet BAP one day and that they can see just how big of a heart you have! It’s incredible how genuinely loving and sweet and supportive BABYz are and to have you be a part of our amazing fandom is a huge blessing! Please keep being the positive and happy angel that you are and I wish you all the best! And please, don’t hesitate in messaging me if you ever need anything or would just like to chat! I’d love to get to know you and all the other wonderful and amazing BABYz I’m proud and lucky enough to call family! Sending you all my love, xoxo! ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

[kisstheassassins]

Hi there😊May I request a HC with Connor and SO who is an assassin in The Tyranny of King, but in this SO doesn't remember him when he finds her in the same prison as Kanen'tó:kon hanging by her wrists being tortured by a bluecoat(similar to what happened to Leliana in DA Inquisition). Also she would the same person he originally knew, but cold & kind of emotionless. Not to mention she wouldn't trust him either. Lol sorry that got dark, but thank you for taking the time to read this!

I hope this is to your liking 😊

Also im using (p/n) as your preferred pronouns.

The two men had finally been liberated from the prison they were held in, but Kanen had one last thing to do here before he could finally leave.

There they were at a four-way cross section of the jail, with Kanen looking around at each hallway as if he were trying to remember something.

"What is it?" Ratonhnhaké:ton asked his friend; his hand was pulling on Kanen's arm to make him hurry, but he pulled away.

"We cannot leave yet," the other man says, running down one of the halls. If Connor hadn't trusted his friend he would have gone the other way, but he follows close behind.

They find themselves at a closed door, and behind it a voice can be heard. It's cold and harsh, and upon creaking the door open Kanen realizes its not just one person, but two. You hang by your wrists from the ceiling by chains, feet barely hitting the floor as you gasp for each breath.

"I know that there were more of you," the guard says harshly. He has some sort of blunt weapon in his hand to strike you when he thinks you're either lying, or doesn't like the answer you give him. Your face is bloodied and bruised.

"Beat me all you want," you growl, "I'm not saying a damn thing. You and your false King can rot in hell."

Your voice rang through Ratonhnhaké:tons ears like a cannon firing just beside him. His breath quickens as he and Kanen rush in just before the guard strikes you, startling him.

However, before they can reach him your legs wrap around his neck tightly, using your chains to lift you up and choke the man with your limbs. You apply more pressure with each passing minute, and eventually jerk your hips sideways to result the sound of his neck snapping. His body slumps to the floor, as well as your legs. You're exhausted.

Kanen moves the dead body to the side and searches for the key while Ratonhnhaké:ton looks you over. He's still trying to process that he even found you, let alone in this prison. And the state of you; it made him sick to see you so beaten. He always promised to protect you and to prevent this type of thing.

"Took your bloody time," you say, an exasperated smile gracing your lips. Kanen unlocks the braces one by one, and Ratonhnhaké:ton helps you stand when each hand is free. You can't help but fall to the floor, and he helps you down gently. Kanen kneels on the other side of you.

"I don't particularly enjoy leaving my friends behind," he says. You rub your wrists and wince at the pain; no doubt these bruises would be here a while.

Your eyes meet the other man's, suspicion building up the more he stares. His eyes are soft and his mouth is partially open like he wants to say something.

"Friend of yours?" you ask, looking up at Kanen. He nods.

"More like a brother. This is Ratonhnhaké:ton."

You both lock eyes again, and a sense if warmth and familiarity fill your chest. It confuses you; you know you have never met this man in your life, so why are you so..... fuzzy?

You nod at him in greeting.

"(Y/n)," you say, and even though he knows it, he smiles to you anyway.

Kanen and Ratonhnhaké:ton help you stand up and keep you close to support your legs, as it was somewhat difficult to walk after the beatings you received.

"Go on ahead," Ratonhnhaké:ton says, "I'll help (p/n)."

With just you two now following a ways behind Kanen, Connor has a close grip on you and you can't help but notice how closely he watches you. You don't have to look to know, but you can feel his eyes on you.

You try to break the wall with small talk.

"Thanks for doing this," you say, "uh.... " A laugh escapes you. "Sorry, I don't know how to say your name."

He knew it was coming, but he played a long.

"What would you like to call me then?" he asks softly. Your eyes meet his once again and you chuckle.

"My mentor," you begin, "he had a son. Died when he was only six." A pause. "Is Connor okay?"

The man smiles and nods, fixing his grip on your back. You fall in closer to him as your legs are still weak.

"It's perfect," he chuckles, but you weren't able to feel how his heart ached and yearned for you at that moment. "How about we get out of here, hm?"

-----

Benjamin Franklin had been attending to your wounds on your hands and wrists, while the other two who saved you leaned over a table discussing their next move for the revolution over Washington. You can't help but stare at Connor and wonder why he felt so familiar to you, but you never met the man.

"Something bothering you, (y/n)? " Ben asks. You keep your eyes focused.

"How come I've never met Connor," you say. Your friend looks to where you are looking.

"You mean Ratonhnhaké:ton?"

Your eyes glance to Ben and then back.

"We settled on Connor since I can't pronounce his name," you say.

Ben finishes up wrapping the bandages around the cut on your palm, watching you wince as he tucks the fabric in.

"Well," he begins, "I don't think Kanen'tó:kon expected to find his friend here in the midst of all this. He went to war with Washington even before Ratonhnhaké:ton and his mother did."

You sit up off the table and pulls your sleeves down over your bandages.

"Do you trust him?"

"He's been very helpful so far," he states, "in fact, I believe he's done more for us in the past week than we have in a month. I dont think you have anything to worry about."

----

A brief war table meeting later, and everyone has departed to complete their duty for the day, leaving you to rest and Connor to go over what he had missed over the past few weeks. You find yourself beside him staring at the wall of photos and drawings that you and your colleagues had collected for evidence and tracking. Connor stares up at Washington, eyes malice and eager to find the man.

"You seem to have a personal vendetta with him," you say, more so than we do."

Connor looks to you and then back at the wall, exhaling sharply.

"He has done a lot of harm and damage to my people, as well as the rest of the world. My home was burned, my people enslaved."

He stops a moment to collect himself and take a deep breath, almost preparing himself for what he had to say next.

"He... murdered my mother. My father."

You swallow the lump in your throat; people were lucky enough to survive Washington's wrath, let alone escape it. A majority of those here weren't so lucky.

"I'm sorry," you say softly.

A few moments pass and you can't help but stare at him, that feeling familiarity hitting you dead in the chest again. Your palms are sweaty too, you notice, and you're chewing the inside of your cheek. Connor glances your way and turns his head when he sees you.

"What?" he says. You exhale sharply.

"Are you sure we haven't met before?" He shakes his head. "I feel like I've seen you before and its driving me mad."

Connor shifts in his spot, thinning his lips and staring at you, waiting, as if he wanted to speak. But he doesn't. Instead he watches you get closer.

"I don't normally trust people so easily," you say, "but seeing Kanen being so open and close to you, I feel like I can too. Don't take me the wrong way Connor, but you feel real familiar to me and I don't know why."

He smiles sheepishly, memories if you flooding his mind back in.... his original world. All of this surely had to be a nightmare.

"Perhaps we should work together," he begins, "see where this goes from here."

You smile at him and he does the same for you, making you chuckle. You pat his arm and make way upstairs; he is in close pursuit.

He prayed to his ancestors nothing happened to you after this.

[comfortfrogblog]

hi :). I'm just here bc I'm having a bit of religious crisis. I'm a 16 y.o girl (like you). I was raised in a Catholic Church, but my mom is actually orthodox (long story). anyway, my mom decided in 2021 that we were going to start going to Orthodox Church, and I agreed bc I didn't really have another choice.

I never really prayed a lot. I think I used to believe in God in a sort of lazy way - I never really prayed or thanked Him, and I was just kind of passive in my belief, if that makes sense. recently, I haven't been doing very well at all mentally, and I kind of just stopped believing in God. I think this was partly brought on by the fact that the orthodox church has some shitty rules (divorce=bad, gay=bad, abortion=bad, etc), and I didn't want to be a part of something that encouraged that kind of exclusivity. I also just don't have a good home life at all - I've always been very lonely, and it just seems like there's a lot of pain in the world, and a lot of bad people that just keep on living. I know I'm just making excuses here, but what I'm trying to say is that I want to believe that God exists, I really do, but I just can't. when I try to pray, I just feel like I'm screaming into a great apathetic black void. my question is, have you ever had a religious crisis like this? and if you have, could you explain how you overcame it? thank you so much. your blog is wonderful :)

ahhh absolutely—im going through one right now lol. in fact, i’d say im constantly going through a religious crisis of sorts. sometimes i dont know whether i should even be allowed to call myself a christian if i struggle this much, but i’ve kind of figured out that struggling is actually the point.

we can never be perfect in our faith. even the most faithful and religious people you know have their flaws and stray from god every single day—we are sinful in nature. but christ paid for our sins with his blood so that we could have eternity with the lord, so that we may be forgiven, so that we may experience the greatest love that there is. im still struggling with this concept—the fact that there is a god who loves us so much that he sent his son to us, and this man died for us. he was crucified and tortured so that we may be saved. jesus was a real person—the most perfect person to ever exist. the savior, the king, the servant.

but i dont deserve that, i tell myself. and im right, actually. none of us deserved it. none of us deserve to be saved, none of us actually deserve to have good things. but that is the point, isn’t it? that god is so merciful he sent his son to die for us, when we never deserved it in the first place? he wants to be with us and have a relationship with us so much that he would forgive our sins and welcome us home. it is because of christ that we are saved and forgiven—not because of our inherent goodness. we have inherent value, but we are not inherently good. christ is the ultimate love, the ultimate good, the ultimate and overarching and sovereign king. so we do not have to grieve over being undeserving; instead, we can rejoice that he provides for us and loves us regardless.

christianity is not easy. it’s not supposed to be—we are called to take up our own crosses and follow jesus. we suffer, we struggle, we hurt, we cry out, we question. it is good to question—we are curious creatures, and it is natural that we long to know the god who loves us. ask, wonder, question. it is okay to go through periods of rocky faith—every single christian that has ever lived has been through the same problem.

but even in our darkest times, when we feel we cannot hear the lord and we think he has forsaken us, he has not. he is crying out for you. he wants you to come running to him. he will always provide for you, and he will always make a way. i have to say that what you said about feeling like you’re crying out into a black void struck me deep—i’ve often thought the same exact thing. but i’ve seen it in the lives of those around me that the more that you try, the more you question, the more you want, the closer you come to seeing what God wants you to see.

and if it’s worth anything, the deepest and most heart-wrenching sentiment i’ve felt my whole life is that of wanting to want him. i want to want to believe, but i still feel the indifference in my heart. i think the answer is to keep trying, keep praying; reach out to people you trust who can give you guidance. the desires of your heart will reflect in your actions—if you really, really want to believe, stop running away. you might not even know you’re running away. we often think we’re the ones chasing God, but the truth is that he is chasing after you. he loves you and wants to be in relationship with you.

[tuber-culosis]

I've been reading through a lot of radfem blogs and posts lately. and gotta say, i'm leaning a lot towards radical feminism. And im definitely gender critical.

but one topic I want to talk about in particular is the criticism of Islam.

Which I feel is totally valid considering the current state of mainstream islam and Muslims.

Mainstream Islam (is what you see on all social media, seemingly practised by a lot of Muslims) IS sexist. And homophobic. There's no use denying it, neither do I think I'm a bad Muslim for not supposedly defending my own religion. You have to recognise the flaws in your own system to improve and progress.

Then arises the question why am I still Muslim then/ why do I still practise Islam? If I recognise the way it is practised is sexist and homophobic, which are things I'm against?

The difference lies in my belief that "mainstream Islam" is much different from the root of Islam.

Many (read: a LOT, not all) modern Muslims have been influenced by ultra conservative movements that want to return Islam to the way they believe was practised during the time of the Prophet (pbuh), ie; some centuries back. This is propagated by the ideas of Salafism and Wahhabism that frankly, prevent progress, reform or any sort of growth in Muslim communities.

I personally have witnessed this in my own country, India, where women are increasingly wearing the hijab and even full body covering purdahs, not talking to the opposite gender, men not looking a woman other than their wives in the eye, etc compared to when my mother was a child, when almost all Muslim women dressed in normal comfortable clothes and there were no much gender segregations. (Gender segregation still existed to a certain degree due to conservative Indian culture ofc)

This radicalisation led to the development of ultra conservative Muslims who enforce sexist, homophobic and separatist policies in the name of God.

They claim to want to return to "true Islam" but they add so many unnecessary rules and regulations you have to follow in order to be a "true Muslim" that are almost so impossible to follow I can vouch I have unconciously broken like 50 of them in one day maybe. These "laws" are derived from:

1. The hadith

2. Arab culture

3. Poor translation of the Quran to fit these radical ideals.

Explaining each of these in a little more detail,

1. A lot of practising Muslims might come at me for this one, but I feel that considering the hadith to be a holy source of guidance and believing everything in the Hadith when there are so many contradictions and logical fallacies, is foolish.

For those who have no clue what the hadith is, Islam basically has the Qur'an, which is, as we believe, a holy book revealed by God to the Prophet (pbuh), which acts as divine guidance on how to live life as a good person. It has rules, suggestions, and guidance to take desicions on a lot of everyday matters we face. It was a godsend (hehe pun fully intended) to women, who weren't even allowed to own property back then. Muslims believe that the Quran is guaranteed againt corruption by God, as revealed in one of the verses. Therefore, to a believer, it is THE book to consult, and the verses will never change, no matter how many years pass. There's actually a really interesting way the Quran is coded, so people can know if it has been tampered with or not, if anyone is interested. But the bottom line is, for a Muslim, the verses of Quran cannot be challenged. There are various INTERPRETATIONS of said verses, but the core Arabic text is the same.

Now there is a secondary source of guidance in the form of Hadith, which is literature that claims to record things the Prophet (pbuh) has said in his lifetime. The problem I find, along with other hadith critics, is that it was compiled much later after the death of the Prophet. Muslims argue that these hadiths were passed down in a proper recorded chain of transmitters that can assure the message hasn't been altered or tampered with. The problem is, that the standard used then was just how reliable was a person's memory and how trustworthy they were, and they did not actually judge the actual content of the hadith. So even if a hadith hypothetically said "Kill all the disbelievers", (which, fyi, it does NOT) and it had a reliable chain of recorders, it would be accepted as "sahih" (trustworthy) hadith, even though it clearly goes against the guidelines of the Quran, where it says there shall be no compulsion in religion (which implies you cannot just murder anyone who refuses to believe/ believes another religion). If one actually examined the content of this imaginary hadith, it would be easy to see it's tampered with by people with or without malicious intent (for eg, it might've actually been "You can kill the disbelievers ONLY if they attack you and will not leave you and your family alone") or some may not even remotely be the words of the Prophet, as he only followed the Quran.

Also, the integrity of the Hadith isn't guaranteed by God anywhere in the Quran. To know more about this, I suggest you read this link , and this one.

So yeah, I take hadith with a (large) grain of salt. So I will not be including them in my discussion obviously.

Now a lot of these hadith have been fabricated, as established, or reflect something that was applicable specifically in that time and setting, seeing that the Prophet was an ordinary man who couldn't predict the future or know about all the different cultures of the world.

So even if the headscarf was a part of Arabian attire, that doesn't mean it has to be assimilated into our cultures now. Just because prostitutes used to pluck all their eyebrows out to signify that they are prostitutes (sex work is forbidden in Islam, because of the negative impact on women and society), doesn't mean that women are not allowed to pluck their eyebrows now.

Following these hadith blindly without considering for a moment that hey, these might be outdated, seeing it isn't meant for all time periods like the Quran, and half of these contradict themselves, maybe we shouldn't consider this as an authority on rules in Islam. Personally, I don't believe anything is forbidden that is mentioned as such solely in the Hadith, and not in the Quran.

But the staunch belief in all of these Hadith leads to micromanaging of women, and literally everyone else. Few ridiculous examples include:

women can't pluck their eyebrows

men can't wear silk or gold, and they need to grow beards

music and dance is forbidden (seriously???)

the Prophet married a literal child of nine years (no do not try to justify it as "it was acceptable back then". According to the Qur'an it wasn't. Girls had to be mature enough to reject or agree to marriages and literal children can't do that. There is plenty of research to prove that Aisha (ra), his wife, was at the very least 19 or 20. Again a case of unreliable and maybe purposefully manipulated Hadith. Scholars and people who uphold the theory that Aisha was 9, and hence, child marriage is legal are pedophiles through and through)

I feel that if anything, hadith should be considered with the authority of historical commentary, giving us more context to the times, and should never be blindly trusted just because a lot of scholars say it is a "sahih" (trusted) hadith.

Also a main feature of Islam is that you don't need an extra priest (no offence to religions who have priests) or a scholar to tell you things and intervene with God for you. You have a holy book, your own common sense and humanity, and you pray to establish a connection with God. Scholars are secondary OPINIONS who can provide insight from their knowledge and research to people who want it, but by no means any authority on things, just like hadith.

2. Arab culture and society, especially back the times that radicals want to emulate, was heavily patriarchal. Islam gave women rights and protection, but they were still limited by the cultural norms of that era.

What these people actually want is to return society to Arabic culture in that time period. (Exhibit A: the abaya/purdah for women and khandoorah for men. exhibit B: sex-segregated spaces)

Back then, women were expected to be caretakers and mothers, and men were expected to be the strong masculine protector.

Enforcing said cultural norms into modern day Islam is ridiculous. Saying that women rarely left the house back then, hence women shouldn't leave their houses now is the same as saying there weren't phones back then, so I shouldn't use one now. Would you ever give up your phones? So how about we do the same to women's autonomy and freedom? Adapt to modern times like regular humans?

If women were meant to stay at home, and meant to just rear children, and never meant to be seen in public, and never meant to be seen by the opposite sex, as extremists say "is God's will", then why is none of this found in the Quran? Do you seriously believe that God, describe multiple times as All-forgiving and generous and kind, would ever persecute women to such a fate? If you do believe that, then maybe you need to re-examine in the nature of God that you believe in. Also if you tell me the "it's for their safety" gimmick, I will flip out. It has been proved multiple times that a woman's dressing has nothing whatsoever to do with why men rape.

Sure, Islam advocates for modesty in dressing, for both sexes. Both are called to not stare rudely (many Muslim men seem to forget that part of the verse, strangely), both are advised to dress in modest, comfortable, clean and practical attire. Never once is anything remotely like "YOU'LL GO TO HELL IF YOU EXPOSE YOUR ELBOW, WOMAN". But the way modern Muslims enforce the dress code (some even going to the lengths of saying women shouldn't wear BRIGHT COLOURED CLOTHES, so as to not attract attention!!! I'm looking at you, Mufti Menk), you'd think that God says something much worse than that. Infact God pulls out Uno reverse, and encourages us to dress as beautifully as we want, especially when visiting the mosque.

3. A lot of English translations of the Quran come from Saudi Arabia. A country famous for its conservative practise of Islam. While the original Arabic text cannot be changed, a lot of these translations include information in parantheses that add "rules" based on the above mentioned factors, that a casual reader or a new Muslim who doesn't know Arabic will consider to be authentic rules of the Quran, extrapolated from the verse, and not extra additions that are often derived from hadith. A very good example of this is the headcover verse, which you can see in this link.

Even all the hostility surrounding homosexual people has been derived from cultural influences and one set of verses. From around 6000 verses, just a single set passingly mention homosexuality. Don't you think that if it truly were such a great sin, God would have explicitly forbidden it? Also why would he create such a natural variation in sexuality and then forbid it? Why isn't it forbidden for animals then? Is all-loving God that cruel to create this natural and healthy attraction in them and then explicitly forbid it when straight people get to marry and live life in bliss? (Please don't say that "God also created pedophilia, and that's natural, so by this logic shouldn't we allow that too?" because pedophilia IS NOT HEALTHY, AT ALL. IT'S IS A DISORDER. Unlike homosexuality) I'm also not picking and choosing things to fit my lifestyle, as some might say, as I am straight, and the only reason I support the LGBT community because I have basic humanity?? And they're humans who deserve rights and joy and freedom and acceptance just like the rest of us.

There have been reformed translations of Quran which examine the verse without prior bias against LGBT people, and they have presented an alternate translation, that the verse condemns sexual assault, which happened to be homosexual in the particular story. Check out this link too, which explains how closely examining the words used could change the meaning from one thing to another.

What I attempted to prove in this extremely long post is that the practise of a religion isn't necessarily the reflection of its true nature.

There are progressive open-minded people who believe in Islam because it gives them hope and solace. People who believe because core beliefs of Islam aligned with their own views and simple logic.

NOT to say there aren't religious bigots who will totally use religion to manipulate people into oppressing themselves or other people. There are, there are a LOT of people like that who call themselves "scholars". And there are a lot of people who follow these extremely harmful regressive version of Islam without critically thinking about what they are following.

I've seen a post discussing the meaning of the word Islam, which means submission to God. It said that it implies total submission, without questioning what we believe.

That is an argument used by both religious extremists to further their beliefs, and by the opposite side, who say the religion is oppressive.

I wish to present a view that Islam itself tells us to think critically, to use our brains to question everything and anything we believe. And then to arrive at our own conclusions. And if you're a decent, kind human, those beliefs maybe align with Islam (not saying that if you're not Muslim, you're horrible, that is not what I meant at all). And if the opinion between people differs, there's always logic and reasoning behind every rule that is presented in the Quran. Don't believe me? Here's the verse that tells people not to blindly follow their parents' religion. And here's a list of verses about critical thinking.

The reason we (atleast reformist Muslims) submit to God is because we questioned it, we came to the conclusion that Hey! This is right. I can submit to my Creator by, who is basically the consciousness that created everything and is the source of all goodness, love and strength, because the rules mentioned here make sense and they privde a moral framework for me to base important desicions on. They feel right. And there is logic behind everything written in this.

I don't mean to present Islam as an all-perfect amazing religion everyone should believe and that I'm right, everyone else, especially those liberal atheists who criticise my religion are wrong and WILL BURN IN HELL. I consider Islam a perfect moral framework, and that's my business only. Anyone can follow what they want and it's none of my business. In fact there is no compulsion in religion at all, and people who say Muslim or go to hell are wrong imo.

What I intended was to paint a picture of reformist Muslims who are still out there, who follow the religion because they questioned it. And not the religion as this stringent rule book we all have to follow down to a t, micromanaging every aspect of our lives and living in perpetual fear of hell, but rather this basic moral guide that teaches us tact, compassion and justice, to bring us closer to God spiritually. I wanted to show that the majority isn't always reflective of what I think is the true core of Islam.

I feel that many practises in the name of Islam are highly questionable and should be criticized, but I also want people to know that the people who seemingly represent the religion, are not representative of the entire mass of believers. That sometimes the practises you might criticize might have nothing to do with the actual religion, atleast according to some of us. It was also for fellow Muslims who might be in the same place I was a few years ago, questioning everything I had learnt was part of my religion.

This is also NOT to undermine struggles of people forced to follow Islam and its seeming requirements like hijab. This is not to claim that nope, every Muslim is fine and ok, and we're all peaceful progressive people. In fact I wish to do the exact opposite, to show that people who enforce oppressive policies in the name of Islam aren't actually backed by the religion and neither should they be backed by other Muslims. I'm also not trying to say no one should criticize Islam. Criticism helps us grow. Criticism is necessary to uncover oppression and eradicate it. So by all means, criticize.

I'm so glad I found the subreddit r/progressive_Islam when I did because it helped me a lot, and opened me to other like-minded progressive Muslims, who actively hope to counter the negative effects of Salafism and conservatism that is overtaking Islam.

So yeah, I think I covered almost everything I wanted to talk about and here's a final link that pretty much just states my position on things.

PS idk why this thingy is in different colours it just seemed cooler and less boring to read

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

Disney but just the Queer Mood™ Songs, a full Spotify Playlist

Open to updates should anyone notice a song I missed!

Tracklist with specific lyrics that fuck us all up under the cut:

KEY: A general list of which songs resonate with people. The 🏳️‍🌈is for general songs; if you relate to a song but don’t see ur emoji beneath it, send me a message and I’ll add it!

🏳️‍🌈 General Queer Anthem  🌈 Gays specifically have related to this song  ❤️ Gay Men specifically have related to this song  🧡 Lesbians specifically have related to this song 💕 Bisexuals/Pansexuals specifically have related to this song  💜 Asexuals/Ace-spectrum people specifically have related to this song 💚 Aromatics/Aro-spectrum people specifically have related to this song 🤍 Trans people have specifically related to this song 🖤 Nonbinary/Genderqueer people have specifically related to this song  💗 Polyamorous people have specifically related to this song

Know Who You Are - Moana

🏳️‍🌈

They have stolen the heart from inside you But this does not define you  This is not who you are You know who you are...

I Wonder - Sleeping Beauty 

🌈🧡

I wonder, I wonder, I wonder why each little bird has a someone To sing to, sweet things to, A gay little love melody I wonder, I wonder, I wonder if my heart keeps singing, Will my song go winging To someone, who'll find me And bring back a love song to me...

Mother Knows Best - Tangled

🏳️‍🌈 honestly this is just... a general song for some of our shitty relationships to guardian figures...

It's a scary world out there Mother knows best One way or another Something will go wrong, I swear

Me, I'm just your mother, what do I know? I only bathed and changed and nursed you Go ahead and leave me, I deserve it Let me die alone here, be my guest When it's too late You'll see, just wait Mother knows best

Don't forget it You'll regret it...

Dangerous to Dream - Frozen Broadway Production

🏳️‍🌈

I can't be what you expect of me But I'm trying every day with all I do and do not say Here on the edge of the abyss Knowing everything in my whole life has lead to this And so I pull inside myself, close the walls, put up my guard I've practiced every single day for this So why is it so hard?

I can't dwell on what we've lost And our secrecy and silence comes at such a cost

I wish I could tell the truth Show you who's behind the door I wish you knew what all this pantomime And pageantry was for

It's dangerous to wish I could make choices of my own Dangerous to even have that thought I'm dangerous just standing here for everyone to see If I let go of rules who knows how dangerous I'd be?

Reflection - Mulan 

🏳️‍🌈🤍🖤- literally everyone requested this. everyone. so im just copy-pasting the entire lyrics sorry not sorry

Look at me, I will never pass for a perfect bride Or a perfect daughter Can it be I'm not meant to play this part? Now I see that if I were truly to be myself I would break my family's heart

Who is that girl I see staring straight back at me? Why is my reflection someone I don't know? Somehow I cannot hide who I am, though I’ve tried  When will my reflection show who I am inside?

How I pray that a time will come I can free myself From their expectations On that day, I'll discover someway to be myself And to make my family proud They want a docile lamb No one knows who I am Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide? Must I pretend that I'm Someone else for all time? When will my reflection show Who I am inside? When will my reflection show Who I am inside?

Everything I Ever Thought I Knew - Tangled: The Series

🏳️‍🌈 when u realize u might not be straight lol

I thought no one could love me And how could I have known? I was wrong, oh so wrong

Everything I ever thought I knew Where I've been, where I'm going Everything I counted on turned out to be untrue Could've guessed, should've known, now I do

If none of it was really me then who am I supposed to be?

I guess I'm someone else now I wonder who I am

God Help the Outcasts - Hunchback of Notre Dame

🏳️‍🌈...yeah. yeah

Yes, I know I'm just an outcast I shouldn't speak to You Still, I see Your face and wonder Were You once an outcast, too?

God help the outcasts, hungry from birth Show them the mercy they don't find on Earth God help my people, they look to You, still God help the outcasts or nobody will

I ask for nothing, I can get by But I know so many less lucky than I Please help my people, the poor and downtrod I thought we all were the children of God

Belle (Reprise) - Beauty and the Beast

🌈 when a cishet thinks ur interested smh

Madame Gaston! Can't you just see it? Madame Gaston! His little wife No, sir! Not me! I guarantee it I want much more than this provincial life!

I want adventure in the great wide somewhere I want it more than I can tell And for once it might be grand To have someone understand I want so much more than they've got planned...

Part of Your World - The Little Mermaid

🌈 SO many people requested this one guys it’s not even funny

Wandering free, wish I could be Part of that world

Betcha on land, they understand Bet they don't reprimand their daughters Bright young women, sick of swimming Ready to stand

When's it my turn? Wouldn't I love, Love to explore that shore up above?

One Jump Ahead (Reprise) - Aladdin

🏳️‍🌈

Riff-raff, street rat I don't buy that If only they'd look closer

Would they see a poor boy? No, siree They'd find out There's so much more to me...

Proud of Your Boy - Aladdin Broadway Production 

🏳️‍🌈❤️🤍

That I've been one rotten kid Some son, some pride and some joy But I'll get over these lousin' up Messin' up, screwin' up times...

Water flows under the bridge Let it pass, let it go There's no good reason that you should believe me Not yet, I know, but

Someday and soon I'll make you proud of your boy Though I can't make myself taller Or smarter or handsome or wise I'll do my best, what else can I do? Since I wasn't born perfect like Dad or you...

Someone’s Waiting for You - The Rescuers

🏳️‍🌈

Be brave, little one Make a wish for each sad little tear Hold your head up though no one is near Someone's waiting for you

Always keep a little prayer in your pocket And you're sure to see the light Soon there'll be joy and happiness And your little world will be bright

Have faith, little one Til your hopes and your wishes come true

Stick to the Status Quo - High School Musical 

🏳️‍🌈 🌈 YOU ALL KNOW EXACTLY WHY THIS IS HERE

No, no, no, stick to the stuff you know It is better by far to keep things as they are Don't mess with the flow, no no Stick to the status quo

Into the Unknown - Frozen 2

🏳️‍🌈

I can hear you, but I won't Some look for trouble while others don't There's a thousand reasons I should go about my day And ignore your whispers which I wish would go away

I've had my adventure, I don't need something new I'm afraid of what I'm risking if I follow you

Or are you someone out there who's a little bit like me? Who knows deep down I'm not where I'm meant to be? Every day's a little harder as I feel my power grow Don't you know there's part of me that longs to go

Where are you going? Don't leave me alone How do I follow you Into the unknown?

Go the Distance - Hercules 

🏳️‍🌈

I have often dreamed of a far off place Where a great, warm welcome will be waiting for me

And a voice keeps saying This is where I'm meant to be

I am on my way, I can go the distance I don't care how far, somehow I'll be strong I know every mile will be worth my while I would go most anywhere to find where I belong

Tomorrow - Annie

🏳️‍🌈 - betcha didnt know disney had an annie movie did u

The sun will come out tomorrow Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow There'll be sun

When I'm stuck in a day that's gray and lonely, I just stick out my chin and grin and say, oh, The sun’ll come out tomorrow So you gotta hang on til tomorrow, come what may...

Learn Me Right - Brave

🏳️‍🌈💜💚

Though I may speak some tongue of old Or even spit out some holy word I have no strength with which to speak When you sit me down and see I’m weak

We will run and scream you will dance with me We'll fulfill our dreams, and we'll be free We will be who we are, and they’ll heal our scars Sadness will be far away...

Strange Sight - Tinkerbell and the Legend of the Neverbeast 

🏳️‍🌈

You stand in the light You're wrong, but you're right And my heart's beating wildly Strange how I'm scared but delighted Afraid, but excited too

I will understand you Strange how I'm drawn to the danger I reach out my hand to you

If you're caught in the shadows and turned all around Lost in the darkness, you will be found If you hear my voice, follow the sound Cause I'm here to guide you home... 

I Don’t Dance - High School Musical 2 

🌈 ❤️ 💕 okay so if you weren’t here for the high school musical tumblr revival you may be confused but listen... it’s about being mlm... 

Step up to the plate, start swinging

I wanna play ball Now that’s all, this is what I do It ain’t no dance that you can show me

I’ve got what it takes playin’ my game So you best skin that pitch you gonna throw me, yeah I’ll show you how I swing

I can prove it to you ‘til you know it’s true Cause I can swing it, I can bring it to the diamond too You’re talking a lot, show me what you got Stop, swing!

Kiss the Girl - cover of The Little Mermaid 

this version is sung by a girl so 🧡💕

There you see her, sitting there across the way She don't got a lot to say but there's something about her And you don't know why, but you're dying to try You wanna kiss the girl

Yes, you want her Look at her, you know you do It's possible she want you too There is one way to ask her...

Can You Feel the Love Tonight - The Lion King 

🏳️‍🌈

An enchanted moment And it sees me through It's enough for this restless warrior Just to be with you

There's a time for everyone if they only learn That the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn There's a rhyme and reason to the wild outdoors When the heart of this star-crossed voyager Beats in time with yours

And can you feel the love tonight? It is where we are It's enough for this wide-eyed wanderer That we got this far And can you feel the love tonight? How it's laid to rest It's enough to make kings and vagabonds Believe the very best

Beauty and the Beast - Beauty and the Beast 

🏳️‍🌈- a lot of queer people tend to empathize with “beastly” characters so we all latched the fuck onto this movie huh

Just a little change, small to say the least Both a little scared, neither one prepared

Ever just the same, ever a surprise Ever as before, ever just as sure As the sun will rise

Tale as old as time, tune as old as song Bittersweet and strange, finding you can change Learning you were wrong...

Healing Incantation - Tangled 

🏳️‍🌈🤍🖤

Heal what has been hurt Change the fates' design Save what has been lost Bring back what once was mine

So Close - Enchanted 

🏳️‍🌈🌈

A life goes by, romantic dreams will stop So I bid mine goodbye and never knew So close was waiting waiting here with you And now, forever, I know All that I wanted to hold you so close

Oh, how could I face the faceless days If I should lose you now?

So close to reaching that famous happy end Almost believing this one's not pretend Let’s go on dreaming though we know we are So close, so close, and still So far...

If Only - Descendants

🏳️‍🌈🌈

A million thoughts in my head Should I let my heart keep listening? Cause up 'til now, I've walked the line Nothing lost but something missing I can't decide what's wrong, what's right Which way should I go?

Every step, every word With every hour I'm feeling in To something new, something brave To someone I've never been

Will you still be with me When the magic's all run out?

If only I knew what my heart was telling me Don't know what I'm feeling Is this just a dream? If only I could read the signs in front of me I could find the way to who I'm meant to be

Wherever You Are - Pooh’s Grand Adventure: The Search for Christopher Robin 

🏳️‍🌈- out of context could be interpreted as romantic, esp since the credits version is a duet (🌈 💕) but the original context is friendship so honestly it’s very 💜💚

I'm out here in the dark, all alone and wide awake Come and find me I'm empty and I'm cold, and my heart's about to break Come and find me

I need you to come here and find me Cause without you, I'm totally lost I've hung a wish on every star It hasn't done much good so far I can only dream of you

But when the morning comes and the sun begins to rise, I will lose you Because it’s just a dream, when I open up my eyes, I will lose you

I used to believe in forever, But forever is too good to be true I've hung a wish on every star It hasn't done much good so far

I don't know what else to do Except to try to dream of you And wonder, if you're dreaming too Wherever you are

I Won’t Say (I’m In Love) - Hercules

🏳️‍🌈 🌈 💕

If there's a prize for rotten judgment, I guess I've already won that

Who d'you think you're kiddin'? He's the earth and heaven to ya Try to keep it hidden Honey, we can see right through ya Girl, you can't conceal it We know how you feel And who you're thinking of

I thought my heart had learned its lesson It feels so good when you start out My head is screaming "Get a grip, girl!" Unless you're dying to cry your heart out

You keep on denying Who you are and how you're feeling Baby, we're not buying Hon, we saw you hit the ceiling

This scene won't play I won't say I'm in love

At least out loud, I won't say I'm in love

Endless Night - The Lion King Broadway Production 

🏳️‍🌈🤍 🖤 

Where has the starlight gone? Dark is the day How can I find my way home? Home is an empty dream, lost to the night Father, I feel so alone

When will the dawning break, oh, endless night Sleepless I dream of the day

I know that the night must end And that the sun will rise I know that the clouds must clear And that the sun will shine

Set Yourself Free - Tangled: The Series 

🏳️‍🌈🤍

There's much more inside of you than anyone can see And now the choice is yours Life waits beyond the doors So step on through, the time has come And only you can set yourself free!

No one else can tell you what to do Or who to be! No one gets to say if you will stay or go

Look inside your heart and find the key... And set yourself free!

Bound up by your worries Trapped by your mistakes Forced to play a role you never chose Why not test your limits? You've got what it takes Let it out and follow where it goes

No more letting someone else define you to a "T" You know that you are strong You've known it all along So seize the day, let down your hair You’ll find a way to set yourself free!

So look to the horizon Open up your wings! Fly away to find your destiny... And set yourself free!

Speechless - Aladdin 2019 Remake 

🏳️‍🌈 ALL OF US ALL OF US

Here comes a wave meant to wash me away A tide that is taking me under

Cause I'll breathe when they try to suffocate me! Don't you underestimate me! Cause I know that I won't go speechless!

Written in stone, every rule, every word Centuries old and unbending "Stay in your place, better seen and not heard," Well, now that story is ending

Try to lock me in this cage! I won't just lay me down and die! I will take these broken wings And watch me burn across the sky!

I’m Still Here (Jim’s Theme) - Treasure Planet

🏳️‍🌈❤️🤍

I am a question to the world Not an answer to be heard Or a moment that's held in your arms

You don't know me And I'll never be what you want me to be

And what do you think you'd understand I'm a boy - No, I'm a man You can't take me and throw me away And how can you learn what's never shown Yeah, you stand here on your own They don't know me, cause I’m not here 

And I want to tell you who I am Can you help me be a man They can't break me As long as I know who I am

They can't tell me who to be 'Cause I'm not what they see Yeah, the world is still sleepin' While I keep on dreaming for me And their words are just whispers and lies That I'll never believe!

Crossing the Line - cover of Tangled: the Series 

🏳️‍🌈 🧡 tfw when u are DONE with that fuckin closet 

This has to stop now This thing where you think that you've been my friend And don't even hear how you condescend The way you've always done

How I've tried to jump that great divide! But I've never got the chances you were given You don't know how much I've been denied Well, I'm not being patient anymore

I'm crossing the line! And I'm done holding back So look out, clear the track, it's my turn! I'm taking what's mine Every drop, every smidge If I'm burning a bridge, let it burn! But I'm crossing the line...

Let it Go - Frozen 

🏳️‍🌈 listen. i do not have to explain this one. you all know exactly why it’s here. we were all tiny gays in 2013 losing our shit in the theater for no discernable reason why. we know

Couldn't keep it in, Heaven knows I tried

Don't let them in, don't let them see Be the good girl you always have to be Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know Well, now they know!

Let it go! Let it go! Turn away and slam the door! I don't care what they're going to say!

It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all!

No right, no wrong, no rules for me I'm free!

I'm never going back, the past is in the past!

Let it go! Let it go! And I'll rise like the break of dawn Let it go! Let it go! That perfect girl is gone!

This is Me - Camp Rock 

🏳️‍🌈 🧡 💕 🤍

I've always been the kind of girl that hid my face So afraid to tell the world what I've got to say But I have this dream right inside of me I'm gonna let it show it's time To let you know It's to let you know

Do you know what it's like to feel so in the dark? To dream about a life where you're the shining star

This is real, this is me I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now Gonna let the light shine on me Now I've found who I am there's no way to hold it in No more hiding who I wanna be...

Breaking Free - High School Musical 

🏳️‍🌈 🖤

You know the world can see us In a way that's different than who we are Creating space between us 'Till we're separate hearts But your faith it gives me strength Strength to believe

Soarin, flyin There’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach If we’re trying, yeah we’re breaking free  We’re running, climbin  To get to the place, to be all that we can be  Now’s the time, so we’re breaking free

True To Your Heart - Mulan 

🏳️‍🌈 🌈

Baby, I knew at once that you were meant for me Deep in my soul, I know that I'm your destiny Though you're unsure Why fight the tide Don't think so much Let your heart decide

True to your heart You must be true to your heart That's when the heavens'll part And, baby, shower you with my love Open your eyes Your heart can tell you no lies And when you're true to your heart I know it's gonna lead you straight to me

Someone ya know is on your side can set you free I can do that for you if you believe in me Why second guess what feels so right Just trust your heart And you'll see the light

Never Knew I Needed - The Princess and the Frog 

🏳️‍🌈 🌈 💕

For the way you changed my plans For being the perfect distraction For the way you took the idea that I have Of everything that I wanted to have And made me see there was something missing...

My accidental happily ever after The way you smile and how you comfort me with your laughter I must admit you were not a part of my book But now if you open it up and take a look You're the beginning and the end of every chapter

You're the best thing I never knew I needed So when you were here I had no idea You'd be the best thing I never knew I needed So now it's so clear I need you here always

Colors of the Wind - Pocahontas 

🏳️‍🌈 - colors.... rainbows.... yea

How can there be so much that you don't know? You don't know...

You think the only people who are people Are the people who look and think like you But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger You'll learn things you never knew, you never knew

How high will the sycamore grow If you cut it down, then you'll never know And you'll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon For whether we are white or copper skinned We need to sing with all the voices of the mountains We need to paint with all the colors of the wind...

I See the Light - Tangled 

🏳️‍🌈 🌈 - you would not BELIEVE how many of y’all requested this one

Now I'm here, blinking in the starlight Now I'm here, suddenly I see Standing here, it's all so clear I'm where I'm meant to be

Now she's here shining in the starlight Now she's here, suddenly I know If she's here it's crystal clear I'm where I'm meant to go

And at last I see the light And it's like the fog has lifted And at last I see the light And it's like the sky is new And it's warm and real and bright And the world has somehow shifted

All at once, everything looks different Now that I see you

Strangers Like Me - Tarzan 

🏳️‍🌈 🤍 🖤- that moment when u find another queer person and ur like “holy shit”

I can see there's so much to learn It's all so close and yet so far I see myself as people see me Oh, I just know there's something bigger out there

Come with me now to see my world Where there's beauty beyond your dreams Can you feel the things I feel Right now, with you Take my hand There's a world I need to know...

Why Should I Worry? - Oliver & Company 

🏳️‍🌈- we’re queer, we’re here, get used to it 

Why should I worry? Why should I care? I may not have a dime But I got street savoir-faire Why should I worry? Why should I care? It's just be-bopulation And I got street savoir-faire

Why should I worry? Why should I care? And even when I crossed that line I got street savoir-faire

Welcome - Brother Bear 

🏳️‍🌈 pride parade amirite

Everyone's invited This is how we live We are here for each other, happy to give All we have we share And all of us we care

There's a bond between us nobody can explain It's a celebration of life We see our friends again I'll be there for you I know you'll be there for me, too So come on!

This has to be the most beautiful The most peaceful place I've ever been to It's nothing like I've never seen before When I think how far I've come I can't believe it And yet I see it In them I see family I see the way we used to be...

The Great Divide - Tinkerbell and the Secret of the Wings

🏳️‍🌈

I'm on your side Let's take this ride And together we're facing the world Doing things nobody's done before And the great divide doesn’t seem so wide anymore

With You by My Side - Tangled: the Series 

💗 - tangled the series was so close to being canon polyam istg

Now; now more than ever We must stick together united

If we're destined to head in our own different ways Let's make the most of these sweet final days Why not go out in a glorious blaze

There's nothing I couldn't do Not with you by my side What in the world would I do Without you by my side...

Love Will Find a Way - The Lion King 2: Simba’s Pride

🏳️‍🌈 🌈

In a perfect world One we've never known We would never need to face the world alone They can have the world We'll create our own I may not be brave or strong or smart But somewhere in my secret heart

And if only they could feel it too The happiness I feel with you

Like dark turning into day Somehow we'll come through Now that I've found you Love will find a way I know love will find a way

Space Between - Descendants 2

🧡 never have i ever seen gays flock to a song faster

And you can find me in the space between Where two worlds come to meet I'll never be out of reach Cause you're a part of me so you can find me in the space between You'll never be alone No matter where you go We can meet in the space between

Even if we're worlds apart You're still in my heart It will always be you and me, yeah

If I Never Knew You - Pocahontas

🏳️‍🌈🌈

And if I never held you I would never have a clue How at last I'd find in you The missing part of me...

In this world so full of fear Full of rage and lies I can see the truth so clear In your eyes So dry your eyes

If I never knew you I'd be safe but half as real Never knowing I could feel A love so strong and true

I thought our love would be so beautiful  Somehow we'd make the whole world bright I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong All they'd leave us were these whispers in the night But still my heart is saying we were right

I’d Give Anything - Tangled: the Series 

🧡 rapunzel’s sad breakup song

So if you find that you're in darkness or despair Though you won't turn to me please know I'll be right there Name any sacrifice, I'll pay the price that's due Cause I'd give anything for you Yes, I'd give anything to relive everything we knew...

Someday - Hunchback of Notre Dame 

🏳️‍🌈

I used to believe In the days I was naïve That I'd live to see A day of justice dawn And though I will die Long before that morning comes I'll die while believing still It will come when I am gone

Someday, when we are wiser When the world's older, when we have learned I pray someday we may yet live To live and let live

Someday, these dreams will all be real Till then we'll wish upon the moon Change will come, one day Someday soon... 

No One Is Alone - Into the Woods 

🏳️‍🌈

Mother cannot guide you, now your on your own. Only me beside you, still you're not alone. No one is alone. Truly, no one is alone…

People make mistakes Holding to their own  Thinking they’re alone 

Someone is on your side, someone else is not  While we’re seeing our side, maybe we forgot  They are not alone, no one is alone...

I Am Moana (Song of the Ancestors) - Moana

🏳️‍🌈 🤍 - it’s about the self-acceptance binch

Sometimes, the world seems against you The journey may leave a scar But scars can heal and reveal just Where you are

The people you love will change you The things you have learned will guide you And nothing on Earth can silence The quiet voice still inside you

I've delivered us to where we are I have journeyed farther I am everything I've learned and more Still it calls me

And the call isn't out there at all, it's inside me! It's like the tide, always falling and rising I will carry you here in my heart, you remind me That come what may I know the way

Show Yourself - Frozen 2 

🏳️‍🌈 - this one was claimed immediately by the queer community and we all have a stake in it but i do want to point out that i got this from a LOT of 🤍 🖤 💜 💚

I have always been a fortress Cold secrets deep inside You have secrets too But you don't have to hide

I've never felt so certain All my life, I've been torn But I'm here for a reason Could it be the reason I was born? I have always been so different Normal rules did not apply Is this the day? Are you the way I finally find out why?

Oh, show yourself Let me see who you are... Come to me now Open your door Don't make me wait One moment more!

(Come, my darling, homeward bound) I am found!

Transformation / Beauty and the Beast (Reprise) - Beauty and the Beast Broadway Production 

🏳️‍🌈

We are home, we are where we shall be forever  Trust in me, for you know I won’t run away from today This is all that I need, and all that I need to say  Don’t you know how you’ve changed me? Strange how I finally see  I found home, you’re my home, stay with me... 

Finale / Let it Go - Frozen Broadway Production 

🏳️‍🌈 this makes me bawl so it gets finale

There’s so much I longed to say Then say it all, beginning with today It’s like a dream I thought could never be  Elsa, you’re free 

Here we stand in the light of day Let the sun shine on 

I take this warmth within and send it up above Goodbye to dark and fear, let’s fill this world with light and love And here surrounded by a family at least  We’re never going back, the past is in the past 

Let our true love go  Let it go!

[kumoriyami-xiuzhen]

Hakuoki Shinkai: Ginsei no Shou - Saito Hajime Chapter #7 English Translation

My translation of the 7th Ginsei no Shou chapter for Saito... It’s probably because that this is my favourite chapter from the game and one that I found especially enjoyable to read (and had more of an understanding of it before getting translations for this lol) that I somehow translated this in record time when compared to all the other things I’ve worked on.... 

Unlike Kazama’s final Tsukikage chapter, the dialogue for this wasn’t all separated line by line in the CN TLs I found for the Saito chapters [NAMELY BECAUSE I WROTE EACH DAMN FUCKING WORD OUT FOR THAT CHAPTER], so some of the text in this remains lumped together. Also, huzzah for google translate providing the translations of place names since I wouldn’t have been able to translate the Japanese words that had been left in the original tl for this otherwise. I don’t usually make adjustments based on the original JP text until I start editing for the video... which will be done later.

All images used in this post were screencaps of game footage I recorded through vlc... also is it just me who feels that my English comes across as a lot more archaic when I stick to the original tl sentence structure...? lol. Anyway, as always, my translation may not be 100% accurate since I do not translate from Japanese.

PLEASE BE ADVISED THAT THIS CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR ANOTHER GINSEI NO SHOU SAITO CHAPTER... one that I do not intend to translate right away... well I also include it in a note about what chapter it refers too. lol. it’s right below the cut.

Enjoy~! OR ELSE! MWHAHAHA!!

(jk, lol. plus, i’m too lazy to think of anything. oh and im currently working on the subtitle positioning for this now as the file got transferred recently since i finished the first round of timing [i need to do this multiple times to get the fade in/out of my subtitles to match the timing of game text’s fade/in... or to at least have them as close as possible] before having all of these tech problems.)

--------------------

Forward Notes

Based on what I remember from tokio-fujita’s notes (sorry but I didn’t check since im kinda busy rn, and the internet on my laptop is kinda unstable as I’m still transferring files... 17.3 gb remains from the dramas transfer) on Saito’s position in the Shinsengumi after leading them to Aizu, I’ve left his position as taichou in this translation due to how the only English translation for that is ‘captain’ which doesn’t show a difference in roles from when he was the Third Division captain ‘kaichou/kumicho’ [note to self: include this along with the link to the page in the post description later. also i will probably just change this to ‘captain’ anyway when i do my subtitle video].

Chapter 6 and 7 occur in Aizu

Hakuoki Shinkai: Ginsei no Shou - Saito Hajime Chapter #7

Translation by KumoriYami

7th month, 4th year of Keiou, after the Shinsengumi left for Sendai——

The Aizu, who had offended the Satcho were engulfed in the bitter flames of war.

When Shirakawa Castle was attacked, it would be a lie to say that I wasn't worried then.

Hijikata-san, Heisuke-kun, Shimada-san, and Souma-kun.

It was no longer possible to fight alongside the people who we deeply trusted since the beginning.

However……

I still have Saito-san.

Saito-san also me, although/even if/despite how I can't fight alongside him.

We relied upon one another, setting out for Shirakawa——

Shirakawa Castle, which had become the headquarters for my father's rasetsu—— we confronted him and Kazama Chikage there.

As Kazama-san had the overwhelming strength of an oni, if the fight was drawn out, Saito-san would have no chance of winning.

But, we still had....

Comrades we could rely on.

Even if [they] leave. Even if [they/they've] choose/chosen different paths.

As long as they maintained/followed their own bushido, everyone was still heading in the same direction.

I believe that as long as we moved forward, one day, our paths will surely cross again, and we will fight to the very end.

If only/I wish that everyone could see each other one more time, I could only pray that everyone would be safe……

Saito-san once again returned to the battlefield.

4th year of Keiou, 8th month

The Aizu Shinsengumi under the command of the Aizu, fought at the Bonari Pass——

After that, they fought bravely to stop the New Government army from entering Aizu Castle.

By the ninth month however, there were not many members left of the Aizu Shinsengumi, yet they still set out to defend/protect Nyoraido [refers to chapter 6] .

This is the story of what happened while I was waiting for Saito-san after he left. 

Fourth year of Keiou, Ninth month

Fourth year of Keiou, Ninth month

Saito-san and the other members of the troop left camp to protect Nyoraido.

Following his instructions/In accordance with his wishes, I accompanied the men who were seriously injured in battle to the rear of the formation.

Yukimura: Please wait a bit longer, I will treat you immediately.

Soldier:……At the most crucial moment, to be unable to help Saito-taichou, I'm terribly sorry.

Yukimura: ……There was no way you could, you are wounded after all.

Soldier: The taicho, is he really okay?

Perhaps it was because his wounds were too painful, that the soldier continued to weakly repeat himself.

Yukimura: Saito-san will be fine. He will surely come back alive.

In order to reassure the soldier, I spoke decisively/resolutely.

Yukimura: That's why, you need to focus on recovering right now.

Soldier:......Okay, I will.

Three days later.

The soldiers who had stayed in Nyoraido, none of them had come back yet.

The news from the front lines had also been cut off.

All that we knew was was the hopeless information brought back by the wounded.

There weren't enough bandages and medicines, and the wounded kept pouring in.

The soldier's and my worries became more intense.

It was at this time——

Aizu soldier: This is terrible/Bad news! Apparently Nyoraido has been completely surrounded by the enemy! The Shinsengumi in Nyoraido might have completely wiped out.

Yukimura:……!

The moment I heard such a dreadful announcement/news, it felt like the blood had been drained from my entire body. [news/information might be changed for ^^^ sentences. might use intelligence, communication]

A commotion spread throughout the entire formation [camp sounds more appropriate].

Soldier: Yukimura-san……

The wounded soldier looked at me with an anxious expression.

Previously, the instant I heard such news, I probably would have broken down into tears.

But, now——

Yukimura:……When such fierce fighting is going on, all sorts of rumours will be flying around we can't assume that everything is accurate before receiving an official confirmation.

Hearing what I said, the soldier seemed to calm down.

Soldier:……That's right. Before figuring things out, we'll still believe in/continue to trust the Taichou, and wait until he returns.

Even if Nyoraido has been surrounded by the enemy, the Shinsengumi may not necessarily be completely wiped out.

Shinsengumi——they, along with Saito-san, I don't know how many times they had escaped from death.

More importantly, Saito-san cannot die yet.

——flashback——

Saito: Yukimura, I wish to make you a promise.

Yukimura: A promise for me......? What is it?" Saito: No matter what happens in the future....... I will protect you with my life. This decision is not because of the Shinsengumi, Hijikata-san, or an order from the Aizu....... but of my own volition.

——end flashback——

At the time, he promised……

Even now, I can still clearly remember how we kissed after.

Saito-san, he made a promise to me.

He will come back to me.

I repeated those words in my heart over and over again, as if to convince myself......

But my heart was beating wildly, and cold sweat dripped from my forehead.

This wasn't able to eliminate my sense of unease.

Yukimura: …………

I truly wanted to rush over to Nyoraido, to immediately go to his side.

But, my duty right now, is to treat the wounded here.

So…… I could only trust/believe in him, and wait here.

After, I continued to focus on treating the wounded while waiting for Saito-san to return.

But, reports on the situation in Nyoraido, they never came again,

The sense of [them being] defeat[ed] became more intense, and the dreary mood gradually enveloped the entire formation [will probably use "camp"]. [The feeling that they had been defeated became more intense, and...]

Soldier 2: Yukimura-san, isn't it time for you to rest? You look very pale.

Yukimura: No, it isn't time to rest yet/it's not the time to rest.

Soldier 2:……Under these circumstances, if you collapse, once something happens, there won't be anyone to depend/rely on [for what you do]. Even if it's just a short nap…… please, for everyone's sake.

When faced with such a strong request, I couldn't refuse.

Yukimura: Okay. Then I'll go and nap/sleep for a bit.

I decided to go find a corner to go nap in .

Perhaps it was because I was so tired, but once I closed my eyes, I immediately fell asleep.

As I slept, I had a dream.

Yukimura Nn, nn......

I didn't know where I was in this dream, the surroundings were hazy as I looked around.

Where……is this?

Yukimura: Is this the Aizu's…… camp……?

……Right.

I was waiting for Saito-san to come back…… then……

My head felt numb and heavy as I looked around again……

Saito:……Yukimura.

Yukimura: Saito-san……!

The person I wanted to see suddenly appeared before me/Now that the one I wanted to see  suddenly appeared, I immediately got up.

Yukimura: You're back from fighting at Nyoraido! Where are the rest of the soldiers……

Saito:……In regards to this, I have something that I must tell you.

Yukimura: Eh……?

Hearing him say such ominous remarks, I couldn't help but feel confused.

Saito: Even now, you have always been at my side…… My gratitude towards you goes beyond words. If I didn't have you, I wouldn't have been able to continue fighting until now.

Yukimura: Thanks for what [reword later]……

Why was he suddenly saying such a thing?

Yukimura:……To speak of thanks, it's too much, I don't need it [It's too much for you to speak of thanking me/it's unnecessary for you to thank me]. Because, you and I……

We are no longer outsiders [/We can no longer be considered as outsiders/strangers...not sure what i’ll go with here] ——I just wanted to say that.

I don't know why, but I couldn't say anything.

The Saito-san before my eyes/right now, there was a subtle sadness to his expression, as if he was extremely sorry.

He…… wasn't like the one [man] I knew at all.

In this unnatural atmosphere, he spoke solemnly.

Saito: I……there is something I must tell you…… No matter what happens, no matter what you experience/encounter/face…… but now I [reword later]……

Yukimura:……!?

I was too late to ask him——

Saito-san's figure was already starting to fade away, then completely disappeared into the darkness of night.

Yukimura: Saito-san, don't go! What are saying to me——

I shouted out then/and lost consciousness.

When I opened my eyes again, my entire body was drenched in sweat.

Yukimura: Just now, that was a dream……

The foreboding feeling/premonition made my heart beat wildly.

Why was it at this time, that I dreamed of Saito-san?

Furthermore, in my dream, it seemed like he had something to tell me.

I had a bad hunch/felt a sense of foreboding, but there was nothing I could do.

Looking around everywhere, Saito-san and the others still hadn't come back.

Although/Even if I dreaded to think so……

Just now, it was just a bad dream, it shouldn't be a sign that something bad would happen.

Saito-san and the other soldiers, what happened to them?

……No, it couldn't be.

He promised me, he would surely come back.

But, if that wasn't the case?

……If I continued to wait here, would he really come back?

I……

Choices 

【Search for him】 【Believe in him and wait】 <-

Although I wanted to immediately rush to Saito-san's side……

I still remembered what he said before.

——flashback——

Saito:......As time passes, things change. The world, ideals, and even the Shinsengumi. Even so, that does not mean that everything must change. As things change with time, so too will there be things that do not change. And I...... I believe in the things that do not change.

——end flashback——

……Saito-san had never gone against the promise he made me/never broke the promise he made me.

Regardless if it was when he left the Shinsengumi to join the Guardians of the Imperial Tomb, or when he was defeated at/during the Battle of Toba-Fushimi.

Also, there was when he ended up fighting Kazama-san.

In the end, he always came back to my side [me].

So, as he promised, he will certainly come back to me.

So, I too——

Yukimura:…………

An incredible feeling swelled in my chest.

It wasn't because of panic, rather it felt like the stars were whispering to me……

This feeling pushed me out of camp.

Outside of camp was a forest that always looked the same at night [reword later].

Although I didn't know if any of the soldiers would return, I thought……

I felt somewhat dejected, and couldn't help but look up towards the night sky.

It was full of stars, quietly twinkling.

Long before I was born, these stars, they must have been watching the world in silence/been silently watching the world.

No matter how many years passed, these silver stars would always shine in the night sky.

Yukimura: Me too……

Under the allure of the dim starlight, I couldn't help but say this/I was unable to restrain my emotions.

Yukimura: I also…… believe in the things that do not change.

Even if the path forward was covered in darkness, the light that pointed towards the future still shined.

Yukimura: I believe——no matter what happens in the future, you will not change.

Just as I muttered this to myself.

There was the sound of movement through foliage.

I froze, staring attentively in the direction of the sound.

After/Then……

???: Is.…… someone there?

The moment I heard that voice, I burst into tears [or: almost burst into tears]. 

Shortly after, a single silhouette flashed in the woods, and its figure gradually became clearer.

Saito: Chizuru…… is that you?

My beloved/The man/The one I loved was calling my name, I could no longer/was no longer able to control myself.

Yukimura: Saito-san…… Hajime-san!

I shouted his name, throwing myself at him.

Yukimura: You came back……! Hajime-san……!

I wanted to welcome him back with a smile.

I didn't want to be crying when we were reunited.

If I cried, that would make it harder to see Hajime-san’s face……

All sorts of thoughts that I had been repressing came bursting out of my heart.

Saito: Ah…… I'm back, Chizuru. Didn't I promise you that I would return? Why are you crying? Could it be, that you didn't believe me?

Hearing Hajime-san's question, I shook my head.

Yukimura: How could I not trust you. However, I was always worried…… [and] when I heard the bad rumours at camp, my heart felt like it was going to crack/split open. Also…… I had a dream, a dream where you went far, far away……

Saito:……I see.

As I cried, Hajime-san awkwardly embraced me.

His uniform, it was completely dirty……

Although his uniform was black, a single glance showed that there were bloodstains and bullet holes everywhere.

Just from seeing him like this, I could tell he had seen a fierce battle. [ or "it was as if I could see a fierce battle." check jp mtl]

A moment later, Hajime-san showed a bitter expression.

Saito: When [we were] surrounded by the New Government Army, I was prepared to be completely wiped out/defeated…… At this time, one of the seriously injured/wounded soldiers told me: we've all been injured [been completely beaten... or some other word that i think of later that implies helplessness] and can no longer be of use to fight. Leave us behind and get out of here with the rest of the troop members——

Yukimura:……!

The decision that had been before Hajime-san, the weight of it left me speechless.

Saito: The me from before, perhaps I would have accepted this proposal. But…… the me now, it was impossible [reword later]. Hijikata-san entrusted me with the leadership of the Shinsengumi. Additionally, I could not leave those who trusted me and stayed/chose to fight together with me when the Aizu were abandoned.

Yukimura:……Nn.

I looked straight into Hajime-san's eyes, and nodded approvingly/nodded in agreement.

Hearing about the changes in Hajime-san's heart, I felt delighted/happy, as if it was my own affair.

Saito: If I had accepted that soldier's proposal, I likely would have returned sooner…… Carefully leading the troops back, it took longer than I thought…… I'm sorry for making you worry about me.

After listening to Hajime-san's words, I shook my head.

Yukimura: I……that's not important/it doesn't matter.  As long as are you are like this, and as long as you come back to me…… that's enough.

Saito:…………Yes [alt I see/is that so. check audio].

Yukimura: What happened to the other troop members/soldiers?

Saito: Because they're moving while carrying the wounded, I think that it will probably be a while longer before they catch up. But they will certainly catch up.

Yukimura: So it's like that, that's good……

Just by/from feeling Hajime-san's temperature [warmth] and his breathing, I was already very happy.

As long as he was like this now, and alive [As long as he lived like this now]…… being at my side, it was enough.

From the way he was looking at me, I could clearly feel that he felt the same way I did.

Saito:……Even for myself, I find it/feel that it's incredible/unimaginable.

Yukimura:……?

I tilted my head, not understanding what he meant.

Saito: Previously, I thought, the ideal wish of a warrior/samurai [check audio] would be to die in battle. However, I now fight for the sake of my comrades, so as to survive [so that we survive/live. chck jp mtl].

Indeed, if it was the past Hajime-san, when faced between choosing life and death, he likely wouldn’t have hesitated.

But......

Yukimura: I.......love the you now....... and I love the you back then. No....... no matter however you are, I will always accept you.

Hajime-san's eyes narrowed in satisfaction.

Saito:……You once told me before. The answer, the one I painfully struggled to find, whatever it was, you would accept it.

Yukimura:……Nn.

Saito: The one who changed me, it was probably you, Chizuru.

Yukimura: Eh......?

Saito: At the most dire point/height of the fighting, I thought of your face…… and my determination to not die grew stronger. Furthermore, every time I thought of how you were doing everything to help the wounded at camp, I kept thinking that these soldiers must not die here.

Yukimura:…………

Carefully listening to my lover's voice, his words, made me feel infinitely happy. [Listening to my lover's voice, his words made me feel extremely happy.]

When Hajime-san was desperately fighting at Nyoraido, if I was able to provide him some courage……

Nothing could make me happier. 

After a short while, Hajime-san slightly tilted his head, almost as if he was urging something.

There was no need to ask what would happen next.

I closed my eyes, quietly responding to him.

After a pleasant wait, our lips were pressed together.

This kiss, it was very restrained, just like how he was.

My heart was beating loudly.

These thoughts became increasingly stronger in my heart, how I wish the two of us could stay in this forest at night forever. [check jp mtl. i’m probably going to go with something to the effect of: How I wish we could just stay forever in this moment, alone and encompassed by this forest at night.*this sentence is pissing me off lol.]

No matter what happens, I will never leave him again.

Saito:……From now on, I will never let you be this sad again. So, let me see you smile/your smile. In order to see your smile, no matter what happens, I will always return to you. [check jp mtl]

Before, I once asked him what he would do one day if he had to drink the Ochimizu for the Shinsengumi……

The answer that came from his lips without any hesitation, was to 【drink it】.

Yukimura:…………Nn. Hajime-san…… Hajime-san, as long as you stay by my side, I will always be happy.

He had asked me to smile, but i couldn't help but to continue crying...

As a result, I was smiling and crying in front of the person that i loved.

About half a month later, the 22nd of the 9th month——

The Aizu-han, which had been firmly resisting the New Government army, surrendered.

——End——

--------------

well, I probably could have made it easier for myself if I just copied the flashback text from SK/KW/EB... but I just couldn’t bring myself to look up the games to copy said text (had to uninstall them from my old pc for space to take stuff off my passport) since it’d really bother me knowing if I copied something than said it was my translation... which is why i didn’t. ah well. as a translator, the idea of taking credit on something that i didn’t translate really doesn’t sit well with me... but I still think that what I did for those parts came close to what I remember from the games...   

gotta say though: I really dislike the word 「隊士」. In both Chinese and Japanese... and that, as a translator,  i really don’t like how the Gregorian calendar names the months lol. it’s just so much easier to just leave the date as what it says based on the old Japanese calendar... with the era name and month number. let’s me not worry about doing research to ensure the accuracy of things (i require that all of my videos be precise when it comes to dates)... 

also, i wish it’d snow everyday for a week. id get motivated enough to finish a chapter with that.... tho it’d need to be a heavy snowfall so it’s very visible. lol. maintaining my motivation on one thing for a long period of time just doesn't come easy to me... especially when it’s something that has +4000 words in it.

[teruthecreator]

Hey... let’s play in the chaos Fitz space... I’m so curious how magic lessons with Festo would go now Fitz is aware of Chaos in relation to his magic...

anon idk what u were expecting when u sent this, but im sure it wasn’t a 1.7k drabble of fitzroy and festo having a lil chit-chat. that being said, though, this was incredibly fun to do so thanks for the suggestion!!! 

_______________________________________________________________

“I don’t want magic lessons anymore,” 

The question makes the fairy halt in their fluttering, staring at their pupil with a curious stare. Fitzroy hasn’t been the same since the centaur assignment, they knew that already. Word has made its way through the faculty about the barbarian’s outburst on the field; hushed whispers of concern that never seem to make it to either headmaster’s ears. Althea Song even came in to discuss with Festo about the future of Fitzroy’s lessons; what might be the safest approach to controlling his wild magic. 

Festo is well aware, though, that “control” and “wild magic” tend to not mesh well. 

This is the first time they’ve managed to get Fitzroy to come to a lesson since his return over a week ago. Usually they meet three to four times a week, practicing simple spells and focusing on how to channel the energy for larger ones. He used to be adamant on his distaste for magic, but after a while he began to warm up to the idea of understanding the arcane abilities he was granted. Snippers seemed to help with that warming, becoming less of a familiar and more of an emotional support crab when Fitzroy’s feelings would go haywire and seep into his magic. But, after the centaur assignment, they were advised to postpone a few of their lessons to give Fitzroy the space to recoup after being cursed (and whatever triggered his outburst). 

After that grace period, though, Fitzroy just became a no-show. No matter how many cheerfully threatening letters Festo would send, Fitzroy never came to a lesson. 

That is, until today, when they came into their class to find Fitzroy already seated in his usual spot; twiddling his thumbs anxiously as he looked down to the floor. Festo was hoping this meant Fitzroy was finally ready to get to work, but...it would seem that’s not the case. 

“...Is this why you’ve been hiding from Festo?” The fairy asks, seating themselves atop a stack of books so they can face the half-elf properly. Fitzroy refuses to meet their gaze, nervously scratching his neck as he nods. “Ah...I see…You do not believe in Festo’s teachings.” Fitzroy perks up at that, turning to them and vehemently shaking his head. 

“I-It’s not that, Festo, really! It’s just…” Fitzroy trails off, looking frustrated and caught between words. “I just...When I came to you first, Festo, it was because I didn’t know why I had been given my magics and, therefore, was unable to control the outbursts. O-Or, that’s why I felt these lessons were good--I know they’re required, given my schooling track, but--” 

“--Festo gets your point.” Festo finishes, not wanting Fitzroy to get lost in the semantics before getting out what needs to be said. He nods his head bashfully and continues. 

“Right, yes. B-But now that I...I feel like now--or, I know now why I have magic. When...When I got cursed? I-I, uh...I met someone…” 

“You met Chaos, yes?” Festo asks, simply. Fitzroy buffers for a moment, mouth sputtering as he attempts to grapple with the knowledge, and Festo snickers. “Fitzroy, did you think Festo did not understand where your powers came from upon first meeting you?” Fitzroy’s cheeks are tinged red as he opens and closes his mouth to try and retort. “Festo knew your magic was wild from before Festo even saw you! There are not many schools of magic that manifest in catfish transformation.” 

“I...suppose so. B-But Festo, if you knew where my magic came from this whole time, why did you never tell me anything?” 

“Because you never asked!” Festo answers cheerfully. Their response makes Fitzroy’s shoulders sag as he pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration. “Also, it would not have been wise of Festo to give you such an answer when you were first learning your magic. Knowledge is not always key to understanding.” 

“I’d say it is!” Fitzroy bites back, his hand dropping from his face. “These powers were imparted on me to do evil, Festo! A deity has been watching over my every move, cheering me on whenever I goofed up severely and got people hurt!” The air begins to crackle with static electricity as Fitzroy gets riled up, anxiously running both hands through his hair and lodging them there. 

“I ripped a man’s hand off, Festo! That’s fucked!! I struck fear into innocent bystanders! A-And the worst part of it is th-that...I didn’t feel bad for doing it! The hand part, at least--I felt awful once I noticed how everyone was...was looking at me like some sort of monster. It’s terrible! I can’t sleep because of it, I don’t have an appetite anymore because anything I look at just becomes a hand or a shitty magic apple, a-and I can’t...I won’t do magic anymore.” He looks to Festo pleadingly, hoping they see his anguish and understand. “I-I can’t even summon Snippers anymore because I’m paranoid about him being a direct line for Chaos to watch me mess up! I-I don’t--I don’t want my magic anymore, Festo.”  

Festo sits there, watching as Fitzroy huffs and puffs on the verge of a meltdown. Then, after Fitzroy seems to have regained a little bit of his compuse, they get up and fly over to him, grabbing his right hand with both of theirs and flipping it over so it’s palm-side up. 

“Make a flame for Festo,” they command, not even bothering to look up and see the utter confusion and hurt on their student’s face. “Just do it, it will be fine. Have faith in Festo.” Fitzroy sighs, deep and long, before shutting his eyes and concentrating. In a few short moments, a small blue flame appears in his hand. Festo makes an affirmative noise as they study the flame. “How did that feel for you to do?” 

“Um...Fine? I guess?” Fitzroy replies, sounding unsure. 

“It did not hurt?” 

“No…” 

“Did not feel forced out of you?” 

“No.” 

“You feel confident that it was by your will that this flame came to your hand?” 

“Y-Yes, Festo, what does that--” 

“Then you are fine!” Festo states matter-of-factly. They push Fitzroy’s palm closed, thus extinguishing the flame. “You should not feel worried about Chaos’s influence!” They look up in time to see Fitzroy’s eyebrows furrowing. “You said yourself that the magic felt natural to you--it was not forced out of your hand or influenced by a force that was not your own brain, yes?” 

“R-Right…” Fitzroy responds. Festo flies up to his face and pokes their forehead with maybe a bit too much force than necessary. “Ow! What the heck, Festo!?” 

“Your magic may have been bestowed upon you by a being of influence, but it is you who controls how that manifests.” Festo explains, suddenly sounding wiser than normal. “Chaos can only influence your magic if you let them; other than that, they cannot control how you choose to use the gift they gave you. From Festo’s experience, they actually hate doing that, so you should not worry about being ‘controlled’!” Fitzroy’s eyes widen and he guffaws for a moment. 

“W-Wait, Festo, you’ve had experiences with Chaos?” Festo twirls around in a circle and giggles mischievously. 

“Not in that way, silly! Fairies are creatures of unpredictability; Chaos is one of our patron deities! Festo has had quite a few communes with them in Festo’s lifetime!” Fitzroy’s face scrunches up in disgust at the implication of their first sentence, making Festo laugh again. “You were the one who said ‘experiences’, not Festo!” 

“Right, but I was not implying you had sexual experiences with a deity, Festo. I really don’t want to be thinking about...really anything like that ever, thank you very much.” 

“You brought up sexual! Not Festo!” 

“Ahhh! I am covering my ears until this conversation ends!” Fitzroy screams as he slaps his hands over his ears. Festo rolls their eyes and kicks Fitzroy in the nose. “OW! Are you even allowed to hit a student?!”

“Festo has tenure, remember?” Festo chides, letting out a snarky “teehee” before flying a little further back so Fitzroy can look at them properly. “Now, do you still want to stop your lessons? Festo won’t make you do anything you’re uncomfortable with.” Fitzroy stares for a long moment, brows furrowing once more as he thinks. He doesn’t think for too long before squaring his shoulders and sitting a little more confidently in his chair. 

“Y’know what, Festo? I think...I think I’m going to keep at this magic thing! Show that Chaos who’s boss!” Fitzroy announces, his usual bravado back. Festo claps their hands as a shower of sparkles rains around them. 

“Hooray! Festo is proud of you for conquering your fears!” Festo cheers, making Fitzroy flush a little with the praise. “Now, to make up for your missed lessons, Festo wants you to come here every day for the next two weeks after your classes! This is non-negotiable!” At this, Fitzroy deflates, just as Festo expected. 

“Alright, I suppose I...deserve that for ghosting you for so long…” Fitzroy groans. 

“Correct!” Festo chirps, causing Fitzroy to roll his eyes. “Now, to pick up where we left off, show Festo how you’re doing with Mage Hand…” 

---

It’s later that night, when the school has settled and all the students have gone to bed, that Festo returns to their office. They pull a set of small candles from one of the drawers in their desk and lay them out in a pattern on the desk’s surface. With a flick of their wrists, the candles are lit in an iridescent flame, and they close their eyes to pray. 

Coming to, they find themselves in a familiar woodland clearing, looking unimpressed at the figure seated across from them. The figure, on the other hand, looks positively delighted to see them. 

“Festo does not want you meddling with Fitzroy anymore,” Festo says, their voice uncharacteristically serious. Chaos smiles and shakes their head. 

You, of all the beings in my court, should know I cannot do that. They reply. I have a special mission in mind for him, and I do intend on seeing it through to the end~

Then, the wind blows, and Festo wakes up back in their office in a circle of smoking candles. With a sigh, they put the extinguished candles away and leave. 

Futile as it seems, Festo is determined to give Fitzroy control over his powers, Chaos be damned. 

[sickassastrology]

the capricorn man. ♑

ahhhh, the capricorn man. the cap god. the know it all. the provider. the money maker of the group. don't get me started on this guy. I promise this one will not be long. the capricorn man is a go getter. he is all about his work and money. because he craves stability in his life, income is high priority for him. so don't be surprised if he has multiple streams of income. one thing I've noticed about them is that they come from some form of a rough background. but they change for the better as they get older. capricorn are loyal and true to those around them, even if they get done dirty. now...will they lie and hide things? YEAH. they can't be trusted all the time tbh. this is another sign that likes to be with people who use them for their money. capricorn men are smart (street smart especially). these men are very traditional. (if you are more of a modern woman, this anit the one for you sis) so when they come home, they want dinner on the table with a clean home. if you can hold down the home, they will take care of the rest. So, these guys are rather childish to be the elders of the zodiac. I don't get that. when a cap man likes you they will take the time to scope you out before making a move. so if you get flirty vibes from them, go with it. they will want to show off so on the first date you will get wined and dined. and boy they do clean up nicely. they have a sexiness to them that is very unique. they believe they are the greatest at every single thing. there is nothing a capricorn man cannot do according to him 😂😅. they are good family men and take care of their children. im bed.....chilleee. hold on to your hat, glasses, wigs, or whatever else you have because they come out like a bucking bull. so if you not ready then....ill pray for you. when his ego isn't blocking, he will open to you and want to tell you all the things that hurt him. I feel like sometimes they want others to heal them, which can be rather unhealthy. they put on such a macho man appearance. they do not like people to see them sweat, so getting to the core of who they are may like a little time. try not to take it personal if they shut you out if they are going through something personal. it's their way of coping. you may find them throwing themselves into activities they like to do, that will help them blow off steam. keep him lifted by bringing good energy around him. he may be prone to a depressive state depending on whats going on. overall I give the cap gods (from my experience, which was not good) a 4/10. 🐐

[x-exo]

Ahh never apologize for replying late! I understand, I'm just happy tumblr didn't eat my ask xD

Ndkandks all of wonho's new songs are just, ugh amazing. For me I think ain't about you is my fav. I find myself humming to it at random times of the day the most, the melody is simple and catchy (also his English has improved so much im proud of him) but them LOOKS for this era ??? He didn't come to play haha. Changkyun being the master of art as always. At first was a bitsad for now performances on music shows but then I remembered he uses uhh "colorful words" so maybe that's why cx nonetheless am proud of him, hands down my favorite mixtape that my favs put out

Welp, the mingyu situation has been fully cleared up (ibelieve you answered this before the final pledis statement?) Pledis cleared things up and mingyu did apologize in the statement (this of course may bring up if he was honest with his apology since it was through the company) and I want to say he was honest? Idk, maybe im naive with believing this but he was wanting to meet with everyone that made posts, he did admit he made jokes and simply went along with them so he is taking accountability. I think now, what is best is just try to like move forward from this. This is up to each fan so I totally respect and understand if you may feel a bit "meh" with getting back into supporting mingyu. It is VALID, any fan that says otherwise is a buttsock. If you need some time, that is ok! If you need a break from the fandom, that is also ok! Afterall, being a fan should be fun and be a happy space! So whatever you pick to do, I support ya! *hugs you* for me, im comfy with like reblogging stuff of him and such. Like im a bit upset still but im a bit more ok If that makes sense? What we are NOT going to do is send hate to OP because their feelings were valid as well

Chanyeol is off fighting indeed, It feels weird but im happy he is able to be away from the idol life (especially after his insta clear out, i got a bit worried there. Sadly the woozi pic didn't survive that clear out gjskdja) what I don't understand is how fans got mad for now group photo and I am like ??? Yeah it sucks to not see them sending off chanyeol but we are in a pandemic and also maybe chanyeol wanted it to be personal? Can kpop fans just chill? Baekhyun released his new album and its iconic, like always lol. May 6 is his date and It will be a shame for sure, but as you said, am happy they can take a break and such. I hope Baekhyun doesn't feel guilty because I'm not mad! (Laughing since exo likes to leave us with gifts before going lol) and minseok!obessesion is just flippen perfection. Like can we greenscreen him into the mv sm? He fits this concept soooo much!

But hoshi making a solo debut, HOLO HAS HAPPEN3D YALL! I cannot stop listening to it, the vocals, beat and dance is just everything to me (a bit sad its not more songs but I'm not complaining) I just was screaming the entire mv xD like it felt like I was being blessed by a God or something lol

Ok my phone is glitching as I'm typing this so maybe its time for me to go xD I pray this sends but until next time we chat!! I hope you are doing well and are safe! Continue being fabulous!

ain’t about you is soooo cute and funky!! but then the dance....😳 dhfsdiuhisuhis yeahhh i think changkyun said it in an interview somewhere that he kind of wanted to promote it on shows but his company told him that it was that or changing the “colorful words” to something more suitable so he declined...I’m glad tbh it makes the album more special imo also he achieved so many #1s and so many views on the mv!! he was so happy!

yeah, I’m glad the mingyu situation is cleared up and he apologised I was missing seventeen so much omg and the members’ messages on his bday the second pledis dropped the last statement...🤧 they love him so much. ALSO GOSE IS BACK!! I’m so happy omggg i missed my weekly dose of serotonin! I’m glad everything is slowly going back to normal. Yeah same i’m okay with it now too.!

have you listened to tomorrow??? omg it’s so so so good i love chanyeol’s voice so much it’s so soothing 😍 hope it was longer tho! yeah tbh fans always find something to complain about like we’re in a pandemic and the south korean rules don’t allow gatherings of lots of people how do you expect them to all get together for a pic and then post it like ????? but anyways I’m glad he got his family with him to say goodbye! also...

EXO IS BACK EXO IS BACK EXO IS BAAAAACKKKKKKKK

I CAN’T BELIEVE MY EYES I REALLY CAN’T omg they’re really coming back with a whole album and a power continuation mv!!!!! also the song sounds like power 2.0 so it’s already soty!!!!! I’M SO EXCITED!!!!

I hope hoshi releases more songs bc i love his style and everything he does for that matter uidhgiufisdfh also MINGHAO SOLO!!!AAAAH so many things happening omgggg

[askmyboys]

Xovarkzis

Here’s the last god/goddess I made so far! More to come im sure lmao

| Name: Xovarkzis (pronunciation: Zo-Vark-Zis) God of Time (also has some power over life and death)

| Nicknames: Xo (again pronounced as Zo) or Vark/Ark

| Gender: He/Him, They/Them, She/Her, and It/It’s, gender doesn’t STRICTLY matter for them, you can call them a god or a goddess either one

| Age: It’s speculated that perhaps Xovarkzis has been around since the beginning of time, their specific age is unknown BUT it’s clear that he is over countless centuries old

| Height: 500ft (when they come down to visit Earth they shift down to about 6’3”)

| Species/Race: Well its obvious but still, just to reiterate- God/Goddess

| Hair Color: The left side of his hair is White and the right side of his hair is Black (his hair is a quiff style)

| Eye Color: Left eye is pure white and the right eye is pure black (they have a third eye on their forehead that is mixed between black n white, it isn’t two eyes, its just one eye with split colors, the left side of the eye is pure white and of course the right side is pure black)

| Skin Color/Body Type: The left side of his body is black and the right side is white (ayo a bit of a reversal there lmao) and he’s pretty lanky tbh

| Appearance: She’s got a few outfits BUT the main one is a white toga with a long black silk piece that’s draped over his shoulder (it’s got some white wording sewn into it but the language seems to be unknown, Xo’s language has been lost for centuries, you’d be lucky to find ANYONE aside from the goddess themself that speaks it or can even translate it, if you REALLY wanna know I’ll tell you, it’s basically going to translate into a blessing) it wears black and white victorian style boots (you know the boot got them h e e l s) for some reason he seems to have antlers, b i g ones- likewise the left side is a white antler and the right side is a black antler, he has necklaces hanging from those antlers full of Turritella Agate stones(it is believed to help in times of change, dispelling negative thoughts and reliving conditions of fatigue) and Snowflake Obsidian stones (it’s a 'stone of purity' bringing balance to the body, mind, and spirit. Said to be beneficial for the skin and veins) and she has a necklace she wears on her neck that is a Sodalite Stone (it helps to calm and clear the mind, bring joy and relieve a heavy heart. Said to aid the metabolism and lymphatic system)

He wears a white glove on his left hand and then a black one on the right (they cut the tips out of them so their black and white claws can peep through BUT ONLY for the claws, I’ll explain the gloves being a VERY crucial detail in side facts)

They have razor sharp teeth (they also have a circle beard btw, it being the colors of each part of the respective skin color ya know), their ears are pointed and they also wear black n white gauges and other earrings of that color in their ears as well, that’s all for the jewelry however- they can also grow black and white wings (v feathery n fluffy wings), they also have a black based tail and then white fluff at the end (p much a dragon-esque looking tail), they seem to have a few scars here and there but nothing TOO major, it just appears to be from a few fights that must’ve ensued sometime in her life.

| Personality: Xovarkzis is an… Interesting being, it usually spends time by itself, tending to her own world and keeping everything in order, he’s usually VERY calm and collected in every situation possible since he’s seen it all pretty much, they’ve seen most outcomes when it comes to life, all the questions, the answers, etc- Xovarkzis is essentially almost an all knowing being, when it comes to fighting Xo has never been one to choose a side, they always stay out of matters that don’t concern them, it’s just… What happens a f t e r  a fight, especially if it gets… Messy… They do warn of the consequences of every action, every choice has it’s consequences and if someone thinks they are ABOVE consequences? They are a fool, even Xovarkzis to be as powerful and high ranking being as she is, even he’ll admit he is not free from consequence and he never will be... 

Xovarkzis finds mortals to be such… Interesting beings, Xo loved to study them whenever they could, always watching and observing from afar whatever it may be, whether their making decisions and choices or simply going about their life… Life ...Another subject as well as death, that Xo knows very well, Xo’s seen such much death in her centuries, at first she had questioned why death had to really exist, why did people have to be taken, taken away from their loved ones, taken away from the living, and so… Easily too... Ark had even gone as far to see if it could even s t o p death but hah, when they look back at that, such a f o o l i s h desire, death, albeit a tragedy by most… Can be beautiful in many ways, a lot fear death, Ark cannot blame them nor would she ever BUT, people tend to forget, there IS still beauty in death just as there is beauty in life.

Xovarkzis always tries to show any mortals that wind up before them that fact, it’s not a way to ease them into death, there is no such way to ease into death unfortunately, but there’s still the beauty, at the VERY least Xo can show them that before leading them to their final destination, Xo might be the god/goddess of life and death (as well as time which I’ll get to in a moment) but they cannot bring a person back from the dead, that would go against EVERYTHING they believe in and it’s impossible anyways, death is permanent, and even if there were a way, if they brought them back, that person would NEVER be the same… Well in THAT regard anyways BUT there is a… “Special Rule” If a person is taken before their time is up? ...There CAN be a pardon but it depends on the person really and the situation, and it still goes against what Xo believes in, in, well a way but… Sometimes an exception needs to be made, if their time was not up and it happened to be an… “Unfortunate” circumstance then they must continue on their journey.

Xo will even admit “Despite my beliefs… Your time has n o t run out… There is still so much you must do, so much to accomplish… So, just this once, I will send you back… But remember, life isn’t something you should take for granted, so many loved ones, whether it be a friend, family, or partner… You have someone who truly cares about you out there, so try and live life to the fullest every day possible… Remember, you w o n ‘ t get another chance like this, next time, it will be permanent I’m afraid…” now as for time, Xo holds time with a fondness… Time can be a blessing and a… Curse to some… Xo used to see time as a curse but they learned quickly, you must do what you can and will with the time you are given, never be afraid to get out there and do whatever it is you desire, time may seem so short… It may even feel as though time is plotting and working against you, but that is simply not true… It’s all about working with the time you are given, there is no such thing as more or less with time, and you had better make the most of the time you ARE given, for one day, your clock, as will everyone else’s, will run out.

Xo keeps the time in order (kinda like father time in a way), she CAN control it in a way, meaning it can stop and start time BUT there could only be one reason for stopping, starting, and speeding up time- And if that reason EVER comes to pass ...Whatever god/goddess/being you worship, you had better p r a y to them, pray as hard as you can… (Xo cannot reverse time however technically speaking, unless you wish to count them bringing a person back via unfortunate circumstances then I suppose in a way she can do that but still) Xo’s always been fascinated with how time worked to be honest, it’s interesting all the things time can make happen… Mortals, plants, etc- those grow up, worlds they age and sometimes become more progressive than others, and mostly people change with time, some anyways- Everything changes with time marching ahead, and that, to Xo is a wonderful thing…

That’s honestly the best I can sum them up?? There’s obvs gonna be more to them but for now this is good for personality basis (Xo despite being so blunt with things, Xo is a sweetheart who just wants the best for everyone, just wants peace, equality, and for people to live life to their fullest potential, Xo wants to see them succeed, failure? ...Failure is natural and should not be something to fear, you can always learn from the mistakes you make and next time you try something, then you’ll know what to avoid next time around, failure in a way should be treated as growth, as growing and learning because it is)

| Side Facts: Xo isn’t one for weapons BUT it does wield a black handled scythe that has a white blade attached to it (if you REALLY want, Xo can be technically called a Reaper even if he is much more than that, but if you wish to classify her as that then so be it), Ark’s world is also made up of black and white (literally if you look at the world, it’s split down the middle, black and white, nothing more nothing less, it’s world is actually considered a “Void” given that there isn’t anything really there, the only thing there in the split is Xo’s “throne” of course because it’s literally right in the center of the world it’s black and white as well, they have decorated it with various stones (like the Turritella, Snowflake, and Sodalite stones) there are a few others that are p much otherworldly, those stones can only be found in Xo’s world (I’ll leave those up to interpretation lmao), there ARE shelves lining the “room” however full of hourglasses, all of various types, various names are labelled on them.

Even Xo’s own, for even Xo, despite being a god/goddess n such, does have a due date himself, all the gods/goddesses do, one day their time will be up just like everyone else’s, granted… They D O live a LOT longer than mortals, animals, etc… Hence why their hourglasses are so big and almost infinite, but Xo knows, deep down, despite their infinite size, the sand will reach the bottom one day and then that will be it… Xo isn’t scared of death anymore, they haven’t been for MANY centuries now (they used to be afraid, they used to not understand why they had to even deal with the things they did, why they were the god/goddess they were, but one day, it finally understood… And that was that)

(If Xo and Thanatos (side note, i do realize that’s an actual god name but this one in particular i made is… woo b o y, just- yikes), but Xo and Thanatos would honestly be at each other’s throats, Xo has never liked picking a side in a fight, has never been one for fighting anyway- but Thanatos would disrupt EVERYTHING… That sick disgusting excuse for a god doesn’t even deserve his status, he treats death like a game for his entertainment, he’ll LITERALLY go out of his own way to make everyone suffer in any way he can, and Xo will not have any mockery and slander toward life nor death in this way so those two would c l a s h)

You would think Xo would live forever given their status and being the god they are BUT, it’s definitely not true! They can even be killed even though ...That’s LITERALLY near impossible, not ABSOLUTELY impossible but still, someone would have to get a REALLY lucky and fatal shot in, however even if they were to fade (if Xo dies, imma say this right now, there’ll be a spotlight on them and they’ll start fading away into little specs and drifting into the wind) the balance of life, death, and time will not implode, there are many other gods/goddesses that will be ready to take Ark’s place even if it may be sooner than expected, there’s always a chance after all…

Also fine, yeah- Unus Annus inspired me p heavily here BUT not ENTIRELY?? I just wanted to make another god/goddess for the world, Osmundus has never met Xo despite Xo sometimes visiting other worlds/Earth, and literally meeting his husband- speaking of… Arvish? ...Xo will forever remember what he did to everyone, to all the mortals, his own people even, everyone he hurt and killed- However, Xo holds no grudges, Xo will not haunt him, besides Vark knows deep down Arvish is tormented constantly by his own head, it’s a wonder the old beast hasn’t driven himself insane with all that guilt, Xo has told him before however “You cannot change the past, what’s done is done… However… ...You can make anew for yourself, it all depends on the choices you make in the remainder of your life, so if I were you, I would make the right choices as best I could” Arvish… Took Xo’s words to heart especially, and told Xo he’d try his best.

Also one thing they have to question now… ...Why is it that the mortals want them to say “Memento Mori” so much? Granted, they DO know what it means and even the words “Unus Annus” I mean she knows what BOTH words mean but it seems to hold such value and significance to the mortals...