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2022-09-30 “love #Tere-pan blog” [ENG]

💌 request

I wish I could see a off shot from your individual PV!

Do you have a Teresa-like thing we should look out for a behind the scenes info from the shoot?

(blog name: deigan)

I messed up, I wanted to do a cosplay so I drew a scar on my face!

I’m Yor from Chainsaw man

Just kidding, I’m Nogizaka46’s 5th generation member Ikeda Teresa

Thank you for opening my blog today

I’ve been told that my visuals match the Ikeda in the individual PV so I tried doing it this way. I first started hearing everyone’s impressions at the meet and greet and so I’ll try doing dressing up for the meet and greet on the 29th of October. So if you have any requests, it would be best to get them in early 🫶🏻🤍

It’s already been a month since the 30th single went on sale, that also means it’s been about that long since the performance at Meiji Jingu… time has gone by so quickly since August. During the national tour there were so many live concerts and it was a special time for us is what I thought but that wasn’t the case since September has gone by just as fast

… ( ˙-˙ ; )

But being a part of Nogizaka was already something extraordinary isn’t it

Personally, for some reason around this season I want to listen to Nigemizu

The bursting heating and brightness of the sun, along with the bright and enjoyable voices of youth are good but before anyone realized it, like how the summer ends silently and quickly, you can really come to love the sensation of Nogizaka46. I said this in the audition as well.

Hnnnnggg so nostalgic.

I went on a little bit of a tangent

Let’s go back to the individual PV (⊃'-'∩)ｼｭｯ

In other words, during the span of one month there are a lot of people who watched my individual PV! If there were also a lot of people reading this that watched it then if my assumption is correct I’d be very happy.

At the previous meet and greet as well as in the comments section, I’ve been able to hear a lot of your opinions, Teresa-panda is deeply moved! (For some reason recently ‘Teresa-panda OO’ has been crossing my mind)

Thank you very much (..)

Secret story of the filming… yup

To tell you the truth one of the detectives in the pair was a part time hero, therefore, at the final DJ booth there were only 2 people the hero and the detective, if you don’t look closely you won’t notice it.

The strange orange and bouncy person was all made of air ( ˙³˙)

The stage door was so small that I couldn’t get through and it was difficult to inflate and deflate, I had to let go off so much air it was difficult haaaaaaaa

I ate a lot of chupa chips, I became familiar with many flavours, the cola and café mocha flavors looked the same but after you had it in your mouth for a while you got a shock.

That’s right, speaking of lollipops, all the of the rain in the video were created 🌧

It was added every time there was a cut to the shower, the sun came out naturally and there was a beautiful rainbow. The staff had a difficult time deciding how to not get it in the shot 𖦹‎ ̫ 𖦹‎

There were various hmmm moments… if you haven’t seen the PV this has all just been gibberish to you, even on the previous blog I wrote about it in my preview, but the real thing probably was shocking? Lol

Please don’t let Ikeda go ̖́-

This is a picture that I took at the previous meet and greet with the intention of uploading it to my blog with Satsuki-chan and hii-chan

Get well soon Satsuki-chan ヾ(´｡••｡`)ﾉ(><)

I’m going to inject you even more than usual to get that Teresa-power injectionnnnn 💉

Hii-chan worked hard to overcome her pain

Out of the 5th generation these two are top class, they’re both bright people and they laugh and smile a lot, I’m looking forward to the day where I can see her smile again ̖́-

Saku-tan as well!!!

All of you who are reading my blog are also amazing for doing your best every day!!!! (Observed by god)

New outfit💜

The design as well as the refreshing feeling when you wear it. When you nervous you feel really hot and it would be great if it could cool you down as well. I guess you can say I’m sensitive to the heat ( ´ｰ`)

The pin badge on the chest looks the same as the one on the 5th generation member’s outfits but I’m not sure if it is. When I was in school it was part of our school rules to have the school emblem on our chest and I remember always breaking that rule (small trivia: nobody wore it in the first semester of middle school)

The broadcast of New Nogizaka Star Tanjou! Is almost here, you’ll be able to see the 5th generation members! I’m looking forward to it.

Ikeda has a small mouth when she is relaxed

P.S This is soon but the broadcast the other day we also debuted out new outfit! It was done it real time, Teresa-panda is delighted!

Yamanote sen pyon game

The previous episode we didn’t Hit and Cover rock paper scissors meow, it might have been good if I lost so everyone could see me go ‘meow meow’… is a cowardly thought that has spiraled out of control. Teresa-panda is reflecting upon this.

But this time, I was some how able to avoid any punishment game and was able to make it through, I hope it stays this way. It’s rare to see a cute side of me.

By the way, on the final week, we did a one shot gag and I borrowed Oodorii Tashiaki san’s ‘Koko, aiteimasuyo!’ (There’s a spot here) (≧∀≦)

Ahh, the seat is still available? Ehehehe

Is Tokyo small?

When you were in elementary school, in geography did you do prefecture area ranking? It seems that the ranking changes if you include the airport or not… By the way Tokyo is ranked the 3rd smallest ( 　･´ｰ･｀ )so smoll ! at least this face emoji is big

On the next New Nogizaka Star Tanjou! Hayashi Runa-san will be a guest and will be performing with Aya and me performing ‘Sobakasu’ by Judy and Mary

Hayashi-san’s singing voice is very clean and beautiful, I’ll never forget her rendition of ‘Kimi no Na wa Kibou’ at the 29th Under Live.

Of course singing while standing right beside her, being within arms reach of her and listening to her sing brings such bliss.

The next time is already tonight! I’d be very happy if you were to tune in and watch it.

Make-up talk.

First my skin care ( っ◜~◝c)

I have really dry skin, and so moisturizing my skin is very important

When I get out of the bath I do toner → milky lotion → cream → wait a while and then put on another cream before I sleep, it’s a race to see which one will win!!!

I’m not good with sunscreen so I have a parka that cuts UV with a hat and an umbrella as well…it’s also a good way to beat the heat so I recommend it!

But when I’m asked why I don’t burn I answer that the reason is that I don’t leave the house and if I do I move around at night because I’m nocturnal (ฅº￦ºฅ)

It’s a pain? You don’t have an umbrella? I’ll go and put sunscreen on you so sit down and shut up!

Base -⁽ -´꒳`⁾-

For sunscreen, a waterproof one would be good. I would do that occasionally during the rehearsals for Jingu, under the shinning sun I would use it and use it but no matter how much I used it, it wasn’t enough. So I had to go to the convenience store to buy more.

I don’t typically use a foundation.

How about:

The SAEM Chip concealer

05 Ice beige

And

CANMAKE color mixing concealer 01

Eyes ( ⚯̱̈᷄ )

I don’t really use eyeshadow!

Probably just light beige, there are times where my make-up artists use lamé like ones.

For the corner of my eyes, I may use a beige brown color shadow. Recently I’ve found that if I don’t use eyeliner my eyes seems warmer.

For my eyelashes I use an eye perm!

I don’t really care about the company or the design.

What I have is ↓

CLIO Pro eyeshadow pallet 13 Picnic by the Sunset

I thought the colors looked nice, and it had a brush so that what I bought, and I like it! The one that I’ve wanted recently is Dasique shadow pallet #07 Milk Latte! Pale colors are in

Mascara is Majolica Majorca

Lash tint BK961

It’s good for people who’s eyelashes get messed up when they sleep

Eyebrows ( ▔•з•▔ )

Koji DOLLY WINK Eyebrow filter

04 dark greige

Black hair with low color saturation hair color this is what I recommend

Lips ( ˙❥˙ )

Recently I’ve bought a lot of lip products

Kiss lip armor

04 counterattack mob

And

KATE LIP MONSTER

02 pink banana, 07 last boss

I’ve looked everywhere but they’re sold out and I thought they were like phantom items but I’ve recently discovered a place that had them. In a panic I messaged Hii-chan on LINE [I’m a big fan of 07] is what she responded with, I originally saw it on Hii-chan’s blog and I bought both 02 and 07 ✌🏻

But no matter how many I buy, my lips look like one entity… so I’m restraining myself.

Cheek (♡ˊᵕˋ♡)

Chifure Powder Cheek 100 111

Are the two I use, and I use them based on how I feel

Scent ( -..- )

I like fig and tree scents 🌳

Recently I’ve liked the scent of Osmanthus and so that what I bought. Recently I’ve noticed when walking around the town it’s a scent that gets me hyped up and excited.

It’s kind of embarrassing talking about what perfume you use isn’t it, if you like you can come talk to me about make-up at the meet and greet.

Well, it’s over!

Was this a good reference? If so I’m glad!

The song I was listening to while writing this blog today was

Black Rock shooter / supercell

Senkou Shoujo / Tokyo Jihen

Yoake made Tsuyogaranakutemoii/ Nogizaka46

RTRT/ Mili

Yoake made is of course an original song but I think it would really suit an orchestral arrangement. I like it’s brittle yet showy and cool arrangement ദി ᷇ᵕ ᷆ )

Preview of next time

I’m going to do an eloquent blog

Satsuki-chan asked what level I was trying to reach with such a childish blog title but I couldn’t answer and went home.

And so…looking back on my blogs up till now I’ve been talking about not caring about life and being strangely obsessed with egg whites and egg yolks, and I all of sudden started comforting you about a broken heart, I’ll reflect upon this mistake.

This time I decided to turn over a new leaf and had a short title, or that’s what I though and but a second ‘Nyu’ would’ve been shorter… what the hell man!!!

Wait, that’s me.

That’s right, so this title is my true feelings for all of you reading this blog (⑉･･⑉)

I know it’s early but I’m itching and restless looking forward to next week’s blog, Please look forward to it.

Tomorrow is Mikkunkun

Well then!!!

📞 Q&A time !

Actually today Ikeda has a question for Merono-san…

💌Dear Merono-san

At the meet and greet the fans have asked what is up with the blog names?

(Blog name: Teresa-pan)

ʕ·͡·ʔ

This is an interesting question indeed! The blog names are just Merono language, Merono translates everyone’s comments and that’s what they become

Te “Is there a rule for how they’re translated”

ʕ·͡·ʔ “Nope!”

💌I know you be workin’ hard writtin’ a blog right now, so there ain’t no way you’ll see this comment ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Time (2022/09/19 17:47:28)

(Blog name: Maruhadaka ni sarechaa tenshi)

You dare to ask this question (this challenge) on a previously uploaded blog and you thought I wouldn’t notice,

Take that!

💌Merono-san… Recently I have been able to see a lot of the honorable Tere-pan on TV and on the Radio, the 37 trillion cells in my body, all of them, are completely obsessed with Tere-pan. This is the terminal stage of Tereru disease isn’t it…

(blog name: Goryokaku)

Each and every cell has contracted the disease hasn’t it! I guess I’ll have to inject all 37 trillion with Teresa power injection |ᯅ･` )

💌Lastly there is a question I wanted to ask Tere-chan. The other day when you took a break during the meet and greet there was a transfer time we could have but I’m not sure what day I should use it for. If you’re going to be in costume/cosplay, or if there was a day that you would want me to come please let me know!!! Thanks a lot

(Blog name: Tereru bakufu no shogun sama)

The day I’m planning to dress up is October 29th!

💌Do you watch horror movies?

(Blog name: Utsukushii pan wo tsukurou ♪)

I 100% don’t watch them, no matter what happens I would never watch them. I say that no matter what happens I would never watch them, this is no the lead in for a joke!!!!!

💌

Pan-san, I wonder if you hammer out these blogs on your phone? When you do it for so long do you’re finger go “ahhhh”? When you write a lot it’s definitely better to do it on the computer

(blog name: Gota Shoten no musuko)

Honestly, Ikeda can’t type (´・ω・｀)

💌RIIIIIIIIING, click! Merono-san, can I get some advice? Ever since I talked with Tere-pan at the meet and greet all I can see now right before my eyes is her. Is this a serious case of Tereru disease?

(blog name: Kunikida poppo)

No! You mustn’t!

💌

Question. Please tell me an episode you have with Aruno-chan.

(Blog name: Potato ha zettai large size)

She seems to like squid

She’s eating squid candy next to me right now

Hii-chan was eating surume in the car and Iroha hit her

💌

Question! 1, Tere-pan when will this bread go on sale! 2, What’s your favorite type of bread! Mine is Tere-pan!

(Blog name: Sachiko)

What flavor would Tere-pan actually be, I believe that a discussion is necessary so I suggest we hold a developer’s meeting next time

Tere-pan like Butter sandwich ♡

However, recently Tere-pan saw a special feature on croissants and now she has become strangely entranced with them. The other day she bought a croissant taiyaki tehe (regret)

💌

Question corner 🌻

1, Please tell me a recipe you want to try one day!! 2, Please tell me your number one moment from Bananaman-san that left an impression!! 3, Tere-chan and Merono-san what do you do when you can’t sleep??

(blog name: Kimchi chige ha kitto kuru)

1, Merono san’s roast

ʕ·͡·ʔ｢…｣

2, There voice is so cool!

Tada! Hearing them say ‘Nogizaka Under Construction is starting now” really moved me.

I wish I had a voice like that

3, I give up on trying to sleep

💌

Personally, who do you think has the best fashion sense out of the 5th generation members?

(blog name: Tettere Level up!)

Aya is really good at wearing primary colors so much so that we call her the magician of colors.

Aaaaa so adorable 💕

💌

Question. Please tell me your honest opinion on Yoda Yuuki’s drawing of a camel.

(blog name: Bond)

I felt like a saw a glimpse of greatness… I need to encourage myself even more to chase after my seniors, I’m going to do my best 💪🏽( ¨̮ 💪🏽)

💌I talk to myself quite a lot, I even talk to myself in public, is there a way to fix this?

(blog name: Creamy menchikatsu)

You can just pretend to be on your phone ദ്ദി˶ｰ̀֊ｰ́ )

💌[Question] I’ve been interested about this for a while but how many characters can you put as your name for the meet and greet. I previously put in 200 characters and there was a lot of system trouble and I didn’t ask what happened, I need to know because I can’t sleep at night (big lie)

(Blog name: Hanzo)

Honestly, if you have a really long name at the meet and greet only the last character is shown on screen (´∩ω∩`)

However, when it comes to blogs you can have as long a name as you want, I hope this clears up any frustration!

💌[Question for Tere-pan] Questions about nicknames were asked before but when you refer to yourself (in first person) what do you say? Tere? I?

(blog name: Geijutsu ka no go gatsu)

When I was younger I used to call myself Tere-chan (When I was in kindergarten)

💌

Question, Teresa-chan has the last name ‘Ike’ (pond), my last name has ‘kawa’ (river) is it okay to think that we both have elements of water? Or is Teresa-chan the element of darkness?

(blog name: Kakei sei kibou)

Newts are found in ponds so I’m like a newt

💌I have a short question! Teresa-chan, can we be friends? If we do I’d be so happy! You’d be my favorite person in the whole world. Well then! See you later!

(blog name: nyokki)

We’re already friends aren’t we

💌Question ^ ^ I’ve never been to a meet and greet with Teresa-chan yet, Is it ok if I participate?

(blog name: Makku)

Hey, I’ve been waiting for you…w..w…why haven’t you come, I’m lonely please come ( ･᷅ὢ･᷄ )

💌

Lastly a question! Teresa, if you were to own your own shop what kind of shop would it be?

(blog name: Shuuuuu)

I wonder if it’s ok for me to answer bread?

💌

About your dream diary! 1, when did you start it? 2, you’re good a drawing, have you ever done ilustrations? 3, what’s the dream that’s left the biggest impression on you since you started your dream diary? 4, Déjà vu, have you experienced a dream coming true? 5, Are you a person that does dream divination?

(blog name ℃)

Near the ocean on the train heading towards the Yamanote train line a black and brown haired dog, that looked like a border collie, along with a boy (about high school age) got off into a station that looked like a cage held by an auntie. After getting off it turned into a half beach, and there was some seawater pilling up. The dog went to go to the elevator to slide while sitting on the aunt.

I wanted to go to my grandmother’s house, but I was worried that she wouldn’t be there, but then I saw her getting on the train on the other platform and so I tried to climb up the stairs but there was a cultural festival and I couldn’t call out to her. I screamed many time and she noticed, she wasn’t surprised her daughter came to play

(2021/05/12 dream diary)

1, I’ve been doing it for a long time!

I’ve probably had a diary since middle school (The one in the memo is probably my oldest one)

2, I’ve never done illustrations, that’s a good idea. There’s people and things I remember so I should try drawing them ദി ᷇ᵕ ᷆ )

3, A dream where I was in the water and I become friends with a big blue dragon

4, probably not a lot

5, If I ever see an impressive dream I’ll look it up! The dragon dream was a good sign, what good thing? The fact that I got in to Nogizaka.

💌

Question, recently at home what food have you made that’s made you go ‘yeah I think I did pretty good with this one?’

(blog name: 𖠚ᐝ)

Recently something that I made that was delicious was Green pepper kinpira, as well as lightly pickled paprika. I’ve might have overcome sweet pepper

Was it pretty good?

💌

Ah, speaking of which, the balance of my Suica card is 1003 yen, are there any perks that come with this?

(blog name: front)

With Teresa-power you will be able to change trains smoothly.

💌I’m going to ask some food terrorism questions!

1, top 3 favorite seasonings?

2, top 3 favorite soups?

3, top 3 favorite meat dishes? I want to eat meat… ( ´ཫ` )

(blog name: Muscat dan)

1, Seasoning

1. Miso

2. Oyster sauce

3. Wasabi

I think I might like Asian seasonings

Ikeda could also say that she likes the five fundamental seasonings used in Japanese cooking. Sugar, salt, vinegar, soy sauce, miso. I also mention it when talking with my favorite people, why? Because I worked hard to remember them!!!!

2, Soup

1. Egg soup

2. Miso soup

3. Not very spicy (important) kimchi jiigae

The clear layer of miso soup is the most delicious.

The also really loved the clam soup that I had during Hina Matsuri! With three leaved closer

3, Meat

1. Steak

2. Yakiniku

3. Karaage

I couldn’t decide between Karaage, samgyeopsal, roast beef…I want to eat meat…even tho it’s late at night I committed some food terrorism! Tehe time (2022/09/22 05:54:51)

💌Hello Teresa-pan-san! ON the previous episode of Nogizaka Under Construction there was the 5th generation strength test and a worn-out Tere-pan was ‘found’. This was well received by the fans but what do you think about it?

(blog name: kotatsu douzo)

Embarrassed…

☎

Hello, Merono-san, I want to ask a question about this strange alien called Tere-pan. 1, What’s Tere-pan’s top 3 food with shrimp? 2, I’m interested in Tere-pan’s conditions on adaptability to earth.

Can you please rhyme based on the names of the 5th generation members. My favorite is ‘Odoroki, Momonoki, Iokmao’

(blog name: Tere-pan ohayougozaimasu)

1. Grilled

2. Sashimi

3. Garlic shrimp and dish fried in garlic oil (I couldn’t decide)

My adaptability to earth is low…

2, It’s got ot be ‘Aruno, dekiruno? Dekinaino!”

(To Aruno who is sitting right next to me, I love you)

💌 Basketball corner!

1, In the same game have you ever refereed and played? In a practice match I was refereeing, and I had to be little inside the ball line so it was rough… On a fast break I had to run like I was going to get the shot! Lmao.

2, with my one whistle I had the pressure of deciding the outcome of the game. Throughout the game, through my whistle, I felt like a king. Teresa-chan when you were refereeing were you nervous? Excited?

3, When the game is high energy (as a referee) the response of ‘it was a back pass’ do you have that in middle and high school women’s basketball? For boys it’s only until junior basketball so I’m interested!

(blog name: Haruka Kaneda)

1, I have

Ball line, opposite side, fast break… so nostalgic, these are words I don’t really want to remember

2, When refereeing for a game with another school I was nervous (--;)

When I was doing it for a 5 on 5 it’s was more relaxed and I looked forward to it!

3, probably did

For study we watched NBA matches, the size of the court and the height of the hoop felt completely different. Something that wasn’t really helpful

💌

Question: 1, this is something I thought about when I was looking at Tere-chan’s picture and that is your lip color is really light, is that because you don’t like darker colors?

2, If you have a good way to raise your eyelashes, please tell me

(blog name: hitori ya)

1, I think you’re right, I don’t really do dark lips. When I do make up I like a lighter style

2, I can’t really do it well… so let’s borrow the power of other people (˙꒳˙ )͟͟͞͞ =

💌

Is there any Fall anime that you want to watch!?

(blog name: Dokoku Keiho Teresa-pan)

Chainsaw man and Bleach thousand year blood war

If you have any recommendations please let me know!!!

💌

The autumn of Food, Sports, there are a lot of things to do in autumn, what kind of Autumn do you want to have? 🍂

(Blog name: futokuteitasu)

The autumn of sleep…is what I want it to be, but I love drawing so I want it to be the autumn of art!

So that’s why I drew this Mao Nao

💌

Question

1, What temperature do you have your bath set to?!

2, Are tomatoes a fruit or a vegetable?!

3, what do you but on bread?!!

4, I think Teresa-pan should do a collaboration with Frying pan!

(Blog name: Rainbow wa baito chuu)

1, 43 ℃ (cool)

2, In any case Ikeda doesn’t eat them, they could be fruit, vegetable or even meat I wouldn’t eat them ‪(´･_･`)

3, Butter

4, I thought about ‘pan’ (bread) but frying pan was unexpected. That would be good, what kind of frying pan?

I think one where I could make pancakes that look like Merono-san face would be good

ʕ·͡·ʔ “Do you want to eat me…”

💌

I’m really interested in finding out how you met Angel Bad End! (lol)

(blog name: Made in me)

I think they were handing out flyers at Kouenji station

💌

I’m a Teresa-pan Oshi from Kyushu, ♡ outside of the tour have you ever been to Kyushu? Is there somewhere in Kyushu you want to go?

(blog name: untie)

Tere-pan went to Okinawa a long time ago! My family and I made a lot of lion dogs (｢ `･ω･)｢ｶﾞｵ

I want to go to Kagoshima and Miyazaki, and eat torisashi (chicken sashimi)! Basashi (horse sashimi) and Yukhoe are other raw meats I like

💌

Teresa-chan how do I get a face like yours? ♡ Please accept me!!!

(Blog name: Nayuta)

I’ll accept it ദ്ദി˶ｰ̀֊ｰ́ )

Let’s do it… Tere-portation! To a world where everyone has the same face as Ikeda! How is it?

By the way, Ikeda doesn’t like that world…

💌

I’ve never been scared or shocked but then I saw Tere-pan for the first time and I felt nervous and shocked so is it ok if I feel for you? Well…I think I already have!!

(Blog name: Noborizaka!)

I love you

💌

Question 𓂃 𓈒𓏸◌

1, How long do you brush your teeth for before going to bed?

2, I’m younger that Teresa-chan is ok for me to talk casually with you??

3, What kind of alarm do you use to get up in the morning?

4, I’m not good with mornings, how do you think one can get up earlier?

5, When you need to do something you don’t want to do how do you forget about it?

(Blog name: Jin)

1, roughly 10 minutes?

I often do it when doing the laundry 🦷

My toothbrush is one that I bought at the dentist

2, ჱ̒(._.)

3, Default iPhone alarm

4, For Ikeda she puts on a lot of alarms

5, to struggle and rage

💌

You never said “Don’t ask me questions” so is it okay for me to ask a question? “Teresa has an interesting spelling and name, are there any other names or name changes that you’ve had? I really want to know so please tell me!

(blog name: Filipe ga pinpinshiteruze)

For girl names it would Akane, for boy’s name it would be Ren!

💌Lastly, a question. Right before your new blog is uploaded is it difficult for you to answer questions?

(Blog name: Yubisuukansuu)

I found you (☆ω☆)!

💌“Question”! Thank you for you hard work at the meet and greet. What kind of things do you talk about at the meet and greet? I want to go to a meet and greet with Teresa-pan but I thought I should do some research first. Kamen Rider Denou, is that something we could talk about.

(Blog name: Showa)

I look forward to talking to someone about Denou

By the way, are you watching Kamen Rider Geets?

💌“Question corner”

1, Which world line would you want to go into, Evangelion or Attack on Titan?

2, You’ve been appearing in my dreams more and more, is there a meaning behind it?

3, Did you know a horse named Terepathy won the other day?

4, Could I edit one of your pictures in the name of comedy?

(blog name: Niwa ni niwa niwatori ga iru)

1, Rather than being eaten by a titan I’d rather get back in the L.C.L… Thought I would want to be titan, but at the same time I want to ride a Eva (≧∇≦)

Speaking of Shinji-kun and co. they’re younger than Aya aren’t they. They’re little babies 🍼

2, it’s fate!

3, Terepathy was born in 2020 weren’t they. This is no place for a baby

4, Once it’s complete please show it to me, （✰✰）I’m looking forward to it

💌

Recently I’ve been listening to Radirer! Everyday while I’m in bed and I fall asleep after 5 minutes. Does your voice have the power to make people feel at ease, lol here is my question! Teresa’s voice has made me fall asleep recently, can you use hypnosis!!

(blog name: Lavender)

I think you’re just tired (´･_･`)

Sleep well

I hear lavender is good for sleep, I haven’t used it!!!

💌

I have a question for Tere-pan! Are you a coarse or smooth anko person?

(blog name: Kawasaki bakery)

I like smooth anko, I want to eat a half dead ohagi ( ˙ཫ˙ )

💌

Is it okay if I ask a question? Thank you for appearing in my dreams every so often! Why are you coming into my dreams?

(blog name: pii)

It’s probably love

💌Tests are terrible! When you were a student how did you get over them?

(Blog name: ai and peace)

The most important thing is to stay strong no matter what score you get.

💌Question! Tere-chan have you ever had a part time job? If you haven’t what kind of part time job you want to try?

(blog name: Biyouin kibou)

I haven’t done a part time job before

I want to work at a yakiniku restaurant, I look forward to makanai (meals you get when working in a restaurant) 🍖( '-' 🍖 )ｵﾆｸﾁｬﾝ

💌

Question! I haven’t really looked into Nogizaka in detail but I sometimes I would see Teresa-chan and it was love at first sight…! What songs would you recommend to a new Nogizaka fan? I really want to go meet you Teresa-chan!

(Blog name: hokahoka terebento)

Love at first sight （𓁹𖥦𓁹 ）You’re making me blush

My song recommendations ↓

Ima, Hanashita Dare ka ga iru and Arigachi na Renai!

I feels like a mix of school life and adulthood

Right now it feels like Nogizaka46 is in a transition period going from a girl to a mature woman, or that’s the image that I have. Please listen to both and I hope you like them.

💌

Question! At my first meet and greet I feel head over heels when Ikeda Teresa said ‘ehehehe’ naturally! Does it come out without thinking?

(blog name: aahhh mou!

Within your typical A + ha combination there is also ahha, and fufu, and ehehe that often come out!

Ihihi and ohoho don’t come out that often

💌

Terepan! Terepan! On the next blog can you please use this question as the final question! Can you please do Shiki Asuka Langley hairstyle! (Soryu would be better!)

(blog name: irohaoki)

I didn’t have a picture so I made this question last ((　˙-˙　)

Which means this corner is over ʕ·͡·ʔ☎ click

A dream where you wish the Merono was there or would show up ʕ·͡·ʔ

I copied Mao and did a picture of me a year before… or my autumn of art number 2

Around this time last year

Peace with unkept hair and clothes and if you look closely my little finger is black with lead… It makes me nostalgic cause everyday was like that until recently

Before I joined Nogizaka, all the pictures I could find were of me and my drawings and there were only one picture of each. This is the only one that I had.

Since joining Nogizaka, my album has become much more colorful, the pictures I have from now and then are both me but it’s strange how different they are.

The future that I drew up then is very different from what it is now, if the me from back then saw me now I hope they will smile!

It seems that I’ve already written 100000 characters in the blog…

22.09.30 #Terepan blog # 15

https://www.nogizaka46.com/s/n46/diary/detail/100742?ima=0630

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melis-writes · 2 years

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hi! can you pls make a scenario where Victoria dies like the way Mary dies in the 3rd film? tyty

The prompt request of all requests… 🥺 My God, angst is just SO popular with these two as of late!! 💔 I haven’t seen the third film (nor will I ever lol) but I did watch a clip of that scene and of course, I’m always ready to provide more angst hehe. I made a couple of differences in the scenario but all I have to say is: warning, lots and LOTS of angst in this one…! 1958, Las Vegas, New Year’s Eve, lots of tears. 😭💔

[ 1958, Las Vegas ]

“And what did I tell you?” Lacing a hand with you, Michael leads you out of the front entrance of the Tropigala. “You were perfect, and it’s obvious I’m not the only one who thinks that. The journalists in New Hampshire will be talking about your speech for Dartmouth for weeks to come.”

“I don’t care what anyone else thinks, and I try not,” you blush, squeezing Michael’s hand and stepping into the cool evening air. “No matter what the papers may claim. Only our family matters.”

“They’ve yet to know the real you.” Michael raises your hand up to his mouth, giving it a kiss as the twins skip outside behind you two next to Esther. “And I can respect that.”

You give Michael a beaming smile, now growing aware your bodyguards continue to accompany you both down the steps with the rest of your family following behind in the midst of conversation with one another.

‘One million for the hit, five million if it lands in the heart.’ Your personal bodyguard Ritchie repeats to himself in his head like a mantra, keeping a close eye on your body’s movements. ‘Just her. Not the Don, not the Don…’

“I couldn’t hide it from you though, right?” You let out a soft laugh. “You figured me out right away, even though I used an alias to make my donations.”

“The funds you sent to Dartmouth to fund education, pay off random tuitions and so forth? Yes.” Michael confirms, “I knew it was you from the start, darling.”

“Mama, mama!” Verona exclaims, trying to get your attention as she excitedly clutches onto the family camera. “Wait for meeee!” She skips down the stairs with Niccolo past you to get in front. “We can take another picture!”

“You two have learned how to use that already?” A small, faint smile can be seen on Michael’s lips as both you and him stop on the staircase.

“One million…” Ritchie mutters to himself out loud, moving to the side of the staircase so he’ll have a better chance at shooting you from your front instead of your back. “For the…”

“But I want you two in the picture too!” You giggle, smoothening out your dress.

“We can get Mr. Neri to take a picture of all of us after too!” Niccolo suggests, looking with anticipation at the camera in Verona’s hands as she raises it up to her eye.

“Yeah!” Verona agrees, “first I get mama in her pretty dress next to daddy!”

“For the hit…” Ritchie swallows hard, pretending to itch his chest and look off to the side while he reaches in his inner suit pocket for his concealed pistol. “Five million…”

“Ready?! One…two…” Verona aims the camera as still as she can, remembering all the tips and tricks she learned from Connie and Sandra to snap the perfect photograph.

Michael stands next to you, wrapping a loving arm around your waist to prepare for the photograph only to find himself completely distracted by the look over Niccolo’s face.

Just before Verona’s about to count down to three and take the photograph, Niccolo turns his head to see Ritchie standing by the lower side of the staircase—pulling out his pistol and aiming it directly at your chest.

“Three!” Everything happens instantly with little to no time to process or react.

‘Five million…if it lands in the heart.’ Just as Verona snaps the photograph, not only does she capture Ritchie firing his gun towards your heart, but also the panicked and furious look over Rocco and Al Neri’s face in the background as they pull out both of their pistols to fire back at Ritchie in response to protect you, but it’s too late.

In just a split second as Michael begins to realize what’s going on, Ritchie’s bullet lodges just to the side of your heart—narrowly missing it.

The impact is so sudden and harsh that it causes you to jolt in Michael’s arms as you gasp out in horror, barely aware of what’s just happened to you.

“VICTORIA!” You hear Michael scream accompanied by two more bullets fired in close range, two bodies unbeknownst to you dropping to the ground and more horrified shrieks by all of your family members.

The warm, bubbly smile off Verona’s face fades instantly as her hands grow weak. The camera drops and shatters to the ground, rolling off the steps of the Tropigala as Verona’s entire body freezes from shock. “Mama?”

“MAMA!” Niccolo attempts to rush up to you but Sonny with tears swelling in his eyes instantly snatches your son up in his eyes to pull him away from the sight of you.

The only thing you’re aware of and can focus on is the incomparable, agonizing pain inside of you from the gunshot. It’s as if you were kicked straight in the chest by something ten times your strength and size, knocking all the wind and energy out of your body.

You gasp out, choking on the blood that you begin to vomit out of your throat and collapse into Michael’s arms whose the only one there to hold you as panic ensues all around.

You aren’t even aware that Rocco and Al have shot Ritchie the second after he shot you, causing an instant death to the assassin you would have never expected, let alone the first scream of terror coming from Theresa who fainted almost immediately after.

Connie had collapsed to her knees in terror, held back and shielded by Leonardo as the rest of your brothers ran up to you and Michael but didn’t touch you or try to intervene—even they knew from the blood soaking through your white dress and from the entry of the bullet that you would die moments after to no avail.

In the next following seconds, Sonny had managed to pull away a motionless Verona to turn away from looking at you convulsing in Michael’s arms, and the pain inside of your chest now began to sear and burn as if a hot poker was shoved right through you.

“M-Michael—” you coughed up blood over Michael’s suit, shaking and clutching onto him as Michael shook you in his arms and held you tightly.

“Victoria?!” Stunned and in a state of horror to see the massive pool of blood forming over your chest as you shakily looked down at the injury that would kill you, Michael could do nothing but hold you in his arms as you saw tears flow out of his eyes uncontrollably. “VICTORIA! NO!”

You hiccupped, coughing up wads of dark blood before growing almost entirely weak all over. Michael could barely hold you up with how he began to shake from fear, seeing you about to lose your life with absolutely nothing that can be done to stop it.

“SECURE THIS PLACE, NOW!” Lorenzo shouted over the screams of the crowd inside of the Tropigala and forced himself not to look over at his dying sister, knowing now the only realistic thing Lorenzo and your brothers can do for you is protect the rest of your family from other potential assassins that may have accompanied Ritchie for the hit.

You collapsed to your knees on the staircase with Michael who placed his hand over your chest helplessly to try and stop the bleeding.

“Michael,” you breath your last, saying your husband’s name as your eyes roll back and darkness consumes your vision.

Dead, your lifeless body lays on the steps of the Tropigala as Michael frantically tries to shake you awake and check for a pulse.

“No, no, NO!” Michael screams, pulling you up into his arms.

Esther attempts to hug and hold onto the twins but can barely breathe from her own sobbing, devastated just as everyone else is around you but neither Verona or Niccolo have turned their gaze off of their dead mother since the bullet fired.

“No, no, no—oh God.” Michael swallows hard, cupping your cheeks and giving you a shake. “Don’t do this to me, Victoria. Don’t do this to me! DON’T DO THIS TO ME!”

“Michael, she’s—” Connie reaches her hand out towards the two of you but Michael instantly pulls you back, protectively holding you to himself.

“No, she’s not!” Michael grits his teeth, hugging you tightly. “My wife, she’s—Victoria’s—” Michael pulls back to see your head tilting back, your eyes closed and feeling no pulse by your neck.

You are gone and the devastating realization sinks into Michael’s heart just now. “She’s…” Michael caresses your face, confused momentarily by the droplets of water landing over your cheek and collarbones only to realize it’s his own tears.

Ignoring the screaming and crying around him, Michael can only hear his own heart pounding in his ears—looking at your fresh blood staining his hands.

It’s only then that Michael finds the last bit of strength inside of him to turn around and face the twins just a few steps down, staring at their father in horror and disbelief.

The distraught look on the twins’ face is enough to pull the life and humanity out of Michael already. Michael collapses next to you on the staircase, breathing heavily and covering his face with both hands.

“Victoria!” Lorenzo cries out your name through his sobs, pulling your corpse off the ground and into his arms—a show of deep, heart wrenching emotion from your brother you never even saw in your lifetime or expected after the small quarrel the two of you had earlier this evening.

“Lorenzo, smettila. Fermare.” (Stop it, stop.) Alessio sniffles, trying to pull his brother back.

“Oh my God.” Matteo clasps a hand over his mouth, lowering his head by your body. “Victoria…”

It’s not the cries or screams around you that speak out for the heartbreak and pain that Michael feels, but it’s when he raises his head up and pulls his trembling hands back that he Michael can let out nothing but a blood curdling scream causing everyone else around him to flinch.

Michael screams and sobs over your body, not an ounce of bloodthirst or vengeance inside of him to demand answers or tear Ritchie’s body to pieces but rather give in altogether to the agony inside of him of losing his wife, his best friend, and the love of his life.

Soulless goodbyes with no meaning and no second glance back to Michael’s first lover, then departing Sicily silently with no remains to bury of his second wife or emotion to show for it, it all comes crashing down on Michael now—loud enough for the world to hear it but silent enough that it will change nothing.

#godfather au #prompts #Michael corleone #Michael corleone x reader #Michael corleone fanfic #moth to flame fanfic #michael corleone x oc #godfather x reader #moth to flame fic #not canon #not canon because OMGGGG 😭💔

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ryuuaka713 · 3 years

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Bungou Stray Dogs Dead Apple: “You used corruption, believing in me? How Beautiful.” A “DISSECTION” OF THE SCENE

I mentioned before in one of the posts by @nataliaphantomhivesblog, where we were discussing about the corruption scenes in BSD, that the scene in Dead Apple is my favorite. So, I decided (like any SKK trash) to make an “analysis” of that scene, just to make a point why I like it the most compared to the other corruption scenes (as if this post is the definition of being productive like I’ll just wasting my time rambling here LOL)

I divided this post into two parts. Part 1 is the more difficult one where I am attempting to write some “character analysis”. While Part 2 is more about how the scene is composed (it’s pretty boring. I’m sorry)

I will NOT include the infamous Lap scene (I know. I know. We all love that moment. But I would rather focus on the scenes before that).

Side note: I do not specialize in film or literary critique, so really this whole post is just for fun. Thus, why I put quotes on the analysis. Take this is as my personal opinion where I’m attempting to make sense by making it sound “fancy”.

But anyway. Here it goes:

In every Corruption scene, the thematic notion is always Trust—as in Chuuya trusts Dazai well enough to use his ability so long as he is present to nullify it. It is a very life-threatening process, especially for Chuuya since Corruption, despite being one of the most powerful abilities, can cause self-destruction the longer he uses it. So, Dazai should keep a close watch on him at all times, and then even giving him a sense of comfort to compensate to Chuuya’s worn-out body and for his efforts. This is the same trajectory in all 5 episodes of Corruption, but out of all of them, what stood out the most (for me) is the scene from Dead Apple.

This scene has amazed me ever since I first watched the movie. And while it just shows their infinite trust, the whole execution of this scene evokes more than just that thematic concept. What I see in this scene is something that all of us have already witnessed, but there is something unique in the way Dazai nullifies Chuuya’s corruption, and their dialogue may be just them bantering and yet, their tonality is different. It is as if, we just touched a moment that is reserved only for these two and we just happened to have the privilege to witness it. In other words, there is a sort of familiarity (or intimacy) and gentleness going on at this very moment—it is cathartic. This is what I want to look into—like how did we come to this?

PART 1: His Proper Partner.

In the Japanese version, ever since the episode where Chuuya made his first debut, they call themselves “aibou” (相棒), referring to a one-on-one partnership. While “nakama” (仲間)can also refer to a partner, it has a different connotation in which the closest English equivalent of that term would be “comrade” or “acquaintance”. The closest English equivalent of “aibou” is, to no one’s surprise, “partner” (or “pal”). And it makes sense, considering that the first kanji (相) can mean “mutual”, “together”, or “each other”. So, to have Dazai and Chuuya referring to themselves as that, it just manifests their familiarity on each other.

And in their case, their “familiarity” is both their advantage and disadvantage. It is a “disadvantage” because they use it to get on each other’s nerves (both in comedic and serious situations).

However, it also serves to their advantage, especially when they have to cooperate in the battlefield. This comes into light in the Lovecraft Episode where they executed Operation Shame and Toad—Chuuya acknowledges Dazai’s tactical mentality, whereas Dazai (as he referenced Chuuya’s mastery in martial arts) let’s his partner do the grunt work. Interesting enough, this is the same episode we first see Chuuya’s Corruption (but not the first time he uses it).

Using Corruption stipulates that “familiarity”, especially in Dazai’s part who has to be present to monitor Chuuya’s physical state, therefore he is aware, not just the consequence in using Corruption, but also of Chuuya’s limit. This explains why Dazai declares that he is aware of Chuuya’s moves and “breathing pattern”, otherwise, as what he himself says, he “won’t be a proper partner”.

What is witnessed in the Lovecraft Episode is the standard protocol that Soukoku uses when they are at their last resort. So, it is not a surprise that we get to witness Chuuya using Corruption, again, when he saves Dazai in Dead Apple, except it is done differently.

Even though Dazai is ten steps ahead of the enemy, the situation is still risky and even more complicated in Chuuya’s part since he is using his ability WITHOUT Dazai present. And that he has to save Dazai first before he can get it nullified. With that being said, it requires a careful approach, one in which they know the other’s moves—Dazai knows too well how Chuuya would react. For instance, the manga version of Dead Apple demonstrates how Soukoku communicates in their operation using “codes”. As such when Dazai got himself kidnapped, no one knew about his whereabouts until Hirotsu mentions about Dazai buying a microscope (to which it leads them to a dead end). However, Chuuya—upon remembering that Dazai teases that he needs a microscope in order to see him—demands to see that microscope, breaks it, and finds the transmitter. It is a well-planned strategy in Dazai’s part where all it takes is to leave helpful clues for Chuuya to pick up and catalyze the operation. In the Dead Apple movie, he does it again:

Indeed, for the audience, it is not new to see Dazai planning ahead and having ulterior motives behind his actions. It is not new to see Chuuya executing his plans and understands his motives either. But seeing these two working together despite those four years of absence, and without physically communicating is beyond human comprehension. Almost like the microscope scene, Dazai is not there to directly tell him about his plan. Chuuya doesn’t know about the antidote until that punch as his only “clue” is that Dazai is working alone, so he sees that something is amiss.

Seeing the critical state of Yokohama, Chuuya knows that he will use Corruption, but seeing Dazai’s corpse, it gives this uncertainty on whether they can make it out alive or not. And yet, what did Chuuya do? He jumped off the plane and activates his ability, knowing that there is “no time to chicken out” or else Dazai’s plan won’t work, and they’ll end up dead. Even if it means doing the job to protect the city, it still takes guts for Chuuya to work and place his life on someone he “hates”. Despite those 4 years of absence, the scene in Dead Apple just manifests that they never doubt each other’s capabilities. And to further validate this, let’s check out their dialogue:

Dazai: You used Corruption, believing in me? How beautiful.

Chuuya: Yeah I did. I believe in your disgusting vitality and craftiness.

Dazai: That was a somewhat violent way to wake up Snow White.

Chuuya: Tch. You’re the one who hid an antidote your mouth knowing I would punch you.

Not only does this scene perfectly parallels to the Lovecraft episode where we see Soukoku bantering while still in a critical situation, it also emphasizes the degree of their trust and how that trust has taken root from their familiarity.

Dazai: You used Corruption, believing in me? How beautiful.

Chuuya: Yeah I did. I believe in your disgusting vitality and craftiness.

Dazai’s first line is the main idea of their partnership, echoing Chuuya’s quote from the Lovecraft episode: “I used Corruption because I trust you”. This is a vital aspect in their relationship since it has been stated before in Fifteen and Stormbringer that “no one has trusted Dazai”… until Chuuya comes into the picture. Ever since their first teamwork against Rimbaud, Dazai finally has someone he can rely on both in strength and assurance, even smiling at the fact that Chuuya doesn’t even deny his proposal but merely asks for his reason.

With that being said, then it is appropriate for Dazai to say that line, touched by the idea that Chuuya still constantly trusts him. It just reminisced so much from what they have as children that it seems to this day, they never forgotten about it.

On the other hand, in Chuuya’s end, he confirms that trust and provides a reason, which is appropriate since Chuuya is Dazai’s “reason-living” like in Fifteen:

Chuuya’s line—“I believe in your disgusting vitality and craftiness”—is very similar in the excerpt from Fifteen, and this just shows how that line from the movie indicates his familiarity to Dazai. By “familiarity”, I mean that he knows his partner’s mental process and motives (as I have mentioned above). In this case, it seems like Chuuya has seen something that he and Dazai have in common: the desire to live. Of course, the latter always craves for death, but with his new viewpoint on Death, his mission in fulfilling Oda’s wish, and the fact that he is tethered to someone who wished to live, Dazai just couldn’t die. And Chuuya, being his constant companion, knows this. This is why Chuuya “believes” that whatever plan Dazai has on mind, it will always work, and in the scenario in Dead Apple it starts by taking a leap into Corruption—which is ironically, the very thing that could kill Chuuya, and by extent, would cause Dazai’s death if the plan is not well-thought or if they don’t work together. By referring to his “vitality and craftiness”, Chuuya is acknowledging his familiarity on Dazai, admitting their “rotten relationship”, and justifying his trust on him.

Dazai: That was a somewhat violent way to wake up Snow White.

Chuuya: Tch. You’re the one who hid an antidote your mouth knowing I would punch you.

Another interesting thing I find in the dialogue is Dazai’s line: “That was a somewhat violent way to wake up Snow White”. Fans think that this is Dazai flirting, where he is implying that he wants to be kissed by Chuuya the same way the prince does to Snow White. For me, I think this little dialogue is more than just fanservice since it makes sense, not only in the context of the movie containing motifs of a “poisoned” apple. I think the reference of the fairytale in this dialogue not only foreshadows his “death”, but it also highlights their dynamic whenever they work together with Dazai acting childish and Chuuya knowing that he is actually being serious (or the fact that he cracks some jokes in most Post-Corruption scenes). This is still related to the whole “familiarity” theme that I have been rambling about; as mentioned before, Dazai and Chuuya would use whatever they know about each other just to rile each other up. These moments are generally meant for comedic effect, but these teasing and bickering can serve as their advantage.

Similar to the microscope scene I have mentioned, Dazai makes that microscope comment seem like a childish joke on the surface, however, Chuuya picks this up as a clue and sees his real motive. This kind of synergy is seen again in the prologue of the movie where Dazai jokes about Chuuya getting hit by bullets when he is in close range of the enemy, and yet, the latter takes it as a warning that an ability-user is nearby. We really don’t know if Dazai leaves a Snow White-related clue for Chuuya before the events in Dead Apple (it would have been pretty cool tho), but that dynamic in the microscope incident and prologue is very similar to that dialogue we see in the movie: Dazai is being playful, but Chuuya sees and calls out his ulterior motives. This is how Soukoku works!

PART 2: The Art of Catharsis

The relationship of Soukoku in the battlefield is one of the best teamwork we have seen in the anime. Both parties are synchronized in the way that Dazai’s brains and No Longer Human, and Chuuya’s fighting skills and Corruption perfectly compliment each other. Moreover, we also see the basis of that partnership, and this is something that the creators want to highlight in this scene (in other words, how did the animators deliver this dynamic?)

In my opinion, I think the words “gentleness” and “cathartic” fit in this scene. To start off, before this moment takes place, we have witnessed Chuuya fighting the Dragon.

That scene was intense! Chuuya activates Corruption, generates into pure destruction with him yelling Dazai’s name (despite the fact that he is not supposed to be in a proper mindset). The way this scene plays out is interesting; in the shot, we see the two main figures (the Dragon and Chuuya) mostly in red—which is a very vibrant color—in contrast to the blue and green background. By using the color that pops out, the attention is on them, and it is topped with the amount of action in that moment. Not to mention, the background music, containing a rock music and a rap, elevates that energy. It is a scene that heightens the adrenaline, so the audience can empathize with Chuuya—understanding him as a character that is full of life, and also his hastiness to kill it before he runs out of time.

When that fight is over, we notice that the music alters into a string orchestra. This is a very good change because the tempo is slower—a direct contrast to the rap music—as if it is slowly bringing the audience down from the hype in the fighting scene the same way Chuuya slowly goes down and hovers Dazai’s body. The music immediately stops right on cue when the punch happens, then the audience is left in silence. Usually in films, silence is used for the purpose of anticipation. In this case, the anticipation is placed on whether Chuuya’s punch and/or the pill worked and saved Dazai.

The transition from the white background into a blue background should indicate that Dazai is alive. And yet, the animators did this subtly rather than showing Dazai’s face (like in Season 1 episode 1), just so the audience is still in the state of anticipation (add that with the white noise in the background). Furthermore, there is a fairytale quality in that shot, like this is similar to when Sleeping Beauty (in this case “Snow White”) wakes up, that’s when the colors in the castle come back.

Getting close to that iconic shot, I love how the animators keep the “camera” in the same place (Chuuya’s face), that way we can further empathize with Chuuya by seeing a close shot of his state: he was at his limit! But as soon as the blood starts moving away from the screen, we can see a bandaged hand moving to his face. And then, finally!

Words cannot describe how much I appreciate the details of that scene, especially on Dazai’s gesture. He moves his hand slowly but quick enough to nullify him right on time. Not to mention, he does not just touch his cheek but rather cups it (look at the shape of his hand!). One can say that the gentleness in Dazai’s gesture is the exact opposite to Chuuya’s punch, and this sort of contrast further highlights the catharsis in this scene. In other words, after all of that intensity with the fight and seeing Chuuya’s bloody state, it is relieving to see that familiar hand touching him, indicating that Chuuya can rest. And seeing that we witnessed and empathize with him, we know what it feels like.

With that being said, that’s why the third shot above where the hand is fully placed on his cheek and he made a short gasp is my personal favorite. It is the contrast in Chuuya’s face where we can still see “Corruption”, and Dazai’s hand to which he activates “No Longer Human”. I have seen some people complaining about how they want to see Dazai’s face in this scene; personally, I think this scene is animated brilliantly as it is. It is only fair to see a close up of Dazai’s hand to indicate that he is nullifying “Corruption”, after all, “No Longer Human” is works through touch. To top it off, the beauty in “not seeing the face” is more powerful because it leaves more to the imagination—we don’t know specifically what kind of face Dazai is making, but the way that hand moves alone is enough to tell us what he is thinking at that moment. And finally, upon contact, we see Chuuya making a slight twitch—this is when Corruption recognizes No Longer Human and deactivates. This is when Chuuya recognizes that familiar touch and knows that his partner is finally awake, so he can finally rest.

Then we have that iconic shot! Like the one I mentioned above, the camera stays in one place, only this time, it is a long shot, so the focus is on them (thus they are on the middle). Interesting enough, there is no background music in this scene, and we can’t see their expressions. Usually, in this anime, when a character is seen faceless, in order to determine what they are thinking are feeling, the animators would usually make them do a gesture or a dialogue.

In this scene, where everything is silent and their faces “unseen”, our focus goes to their exchanges. Both Mamoru and Taniyama use their “bedroom voices”, and I think it is appropriate considering that their dialogue contains a deeper meaning in regards of their relationship. In other words, as mentioned before, it may seem like another day of bantering, but with their tone, there is something sincere and intimate in what they are saying. Also, the playfulness in Dazai’s comment and Chuuya’s response hits different compared to their other moments of constant yelling. You really don’t need the close up of their faces in order to see that they are at peace in each other’s company.

In addition, the color scheme of the scene is predominantly blue, which makes sense, not just because of Dazai’s ability, but also because it highlights the serenity in the scene. The blue color, the orb, and the bandages that glide silently are animated in a way that they buffer out the red that we have seen back with Corruption, and also indicates a sense of “protection” (which is later seen in the lap scene when Dazai has to protect Chuuya from the fog). In short, the ambiance perfectly fits with how Dazai is there to give Chuuya a sense of comfort in Post-Corruption, letting him rest so that he can compensate for all that he did.

**********

The scene in Dead Apple is something that lies in between of the familiar and the new—we have seen Dazai and Chuuya in this situation before, we know how they function as a team, and we know the level of risk they are taking. But this is something that we have never seen before; like subtleness in his gestures, the softness in their tones, and the fact that these two are in a position where they are saving each other, which becomes part of their instincts. They show how much they trust each other by knowing how much they knew of each other. They acknowledge the fact that their fates are tethered regardless of the years of absence. And finally, it is not just the Prince saving Snow White, but rather: the Prince saves Snow White and Snow White saving him in return.

OK, I just literally fried my brain. If you’ve read this far, I thank you so much for your time! I am so sorry if this is too long. I welcome for any critiques or discussions. So yeah, that’s my ted-talk

#soukoku #bsd #bsd analysis #dazai x chuuya #skk #Dazai Osamu #Nakahara Chuuya #chuuya nakahara #bsd manga #bsd dead apple #dead apple #bsd fifteen #bungou stray dogs #I dont even know if this makes sense #That moment when I said that I can make a five-paged essay of this and realized it's no longer a joke (*ﾉωﾉ)

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xgryffinwhore · 3 years

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Hey! Can I request a jaeden martell x reader where basically their charters are dating on a tv show and they are really really good best friends in real life and they they both go on the Jimmy fallon show and he keeps on asking if they’re dating because everyone thinks they are and when they say no he obvi doesn’t let it go lol and it ends up slipping up that jaeden did/ does have a crush on reader and they maybe end up sharing a kiss in front is Jimmy & audience & stuff😶just an idea i had 😂:)

i love this idea wow, thinking i’m going to put my own little twist on it but i think you’ll still be pleased ;)

just friends

warnings!: suggestive topics, fluff

word count: 2.1k

five

your face was being touched up with powder, the cotton pad dabbing at your nose as the white powder absorbed into any oil your face may have had.

four

you look over at jimmy, this wasn’t your first talk show, but it had been the biggest one with the most following. it was intimidating, you bounced your foot up and down and played with your hands.

three

behavior jaeden had grown to recognize. he knew you better then you knew yourself, your anxiety was worse then you put it out to be. “you ok?” he questioned, “fine, i’m fine” you painted a small smile on your face. but he wasn’t easily fooled.

two

he grabbed one of your hands and rubbed circles into your palm, this sent vibrations of relaxation down your spine.

one

his eyes locked with yours, you swore they were a different color each time you saw them. sometimes more blue, sometimes more green, sometimes dark with mystery, sometimes light and playful.

‘aaand where on air’

you wiped the hand that was interlocked with his off on your dress, it was clammy. the curtain came up fast, and your vision was soon flooded with bright lights and silhouettes of bodies.

making out the faces in the sea of people was impossible, but you knew your friends were out there. they had flown out to see you, a) they could go see new york and b) you were on national television, and they wouldn’t miss it for the world.

jimmy was talking, you knew that much, but your nerves took over and honestly you weren’t registering a damn thing he was saying. the crowd cheered, you snapped out of your daze.

“and here tonight, we have jaeden martell and y/n l/n from the new HBO tv series: turning tables”

he turned to both of us, and gave everyone time to clap. he tired to speak over the loud hands, moving on with his show, but the crowd made that difficult. eventually the clapping died out and he could continue.

“now, i’ve watched all of the episodes but, for the people who haven’t seen: can you explain what the show is about?” he looked a jaeden, you let go of a breathe you had held in.

“s-sure” jaeden turned to face the audience more, he was soft spoken and shy, so it was important he projected as much as he could.

“turning tables is a teen drama. it’s about families of poverty in the seattle washington area and how they struggle to go to school and work. my character, jennings cooper, is the main protagonist. the show is mainly from his point of view, and how he struggle to support his family.”

jimmy nods and smiles, he looks pleased with his explanation. i’m truth the show wasn’t that simple, he knew that. but, it would take so long to explain.

“and y/n, who do you play?” he knew the answer to this obviously, but you were becoming a crowd favorite. everyone loved your personality, and you were an up-and-coming a list celebrity.

“i play parker marlow, jennings girlfriend” you blushed at this statement, the crowd giggled and ‘ouuu’ed. jimmy rubbed his hands together, getting excited at the upcoming topic of discussion.

“so, your romance on season one was steamy” you thought back to the scenes you did together. all of the kissing, which felt normal at this point. he wasn’t a bad kisser, in fact- you didn’t mind it at all. your romance through the season built up to a sex scene, your mind flashed through the memories of filming it.

filming those scenes isnt half as steamy as you think it is. it’s awkward, you laugh a lot. you had never felt that exposed in your life! however watching it was different, it looked so real, so perfect.

you blurred out your thoughts, mr. fallon still speaking on the subject. “can we expect more -“ jimmy searched for your ship name, it was on the tip of his tongue. the combination of your first names on the show didn’t make an attractive combo. it was either jarker or pennings. your last names matched a little better.

“-carlow” jaeden finished for him. jimmy nodded and smiled “yes- carlow- can we expect more carlow next season?” you both looked at each other and smiled. the writers for the show already had the next four seasons laid out. you knew that carlow was a continuing relationship on the show.

“yes, you should expect more of that sort of content from us” you stated. the people in the crowd had a positive responce to this, the applause lapping until it died out once again.

“right, your characters have so much chemistry in the show. two struggling teens just trying to break even.” jaeden agreed “yes, our characters balance each other out, and being from the same background helps them associate. jennings is kind of a bad boy-as the ladies say- he’s a felon, he steels cars and sells them to counterfeit manufacturers and dealers for money. parker, y/n’s character, has a job at a diner. she shows him the light at the end of the tunnel if he chooses to go down a good path.”

“yes, parker gets jennings a job at the diner with her, and he falls for her sweet disposition even after everything she’s been through” you add.

jimmy licks his lips and pops another question: “so id imagine the chemistry in the show heightens the real life thing?” he cocked an eye brow, the group gasping at the intrusiveness.

“jaeden and i are just friends” you blurt out, your nerves working up again. it was hard, you liked jaeden ever since you had your first kiss with him.

“y-yeah” he stutters, he obviously wasn’t expecting this either “friends” jimmy shakes his head and puts his finger on his lip “recently, you both have been showing a lot of pictures of you two together on social media.”

the audience ‘awwwed’ at the photos that displayed behind you. on the screen, there were pictures of you and him that were on both of your instagrams. you two at gardens, getting food, even watching movies at each other’s houses.

“for just friends, these photos looks intimate , wouldn’t you say” a bunch of ‘yes’’s and ‘mhm’’s came from the crowd as both of your faces became red.

“we’re just best friends, honestly” jaeden laughed nervously, he fixed his hair with his hand has he always does.

“right right- can you tell me when this photo is from?” jimmy asked, the last picture flashing on the screen. it was of you both, you had just filmed your first scene together.

the first scene you filmed together was episode two, he saved you after you fell into ice cold water. it was how the characters met, and it was filmed at a cove on a windy august day.

the picture was a little blurry, but it added character. he had his arm around you, both of your hair soaked, and you share a huge towel. you remember how cold you were, your teeth chattered so rapidly. his hair was stuck to his forehead and more small pieces went up. and your lips were almost purple, half from the makeup, half because you swore that was the coldest water you had ever went in.

“that’s from when we first started filming, it was the first time we met in the show” you recited, re living the memory in your head. you remember jaeden pulling your head into his chest when the wind began blowing. you remember his thumb trying to create friction on your back to make you just a little warm.

“yes yes- you two look so adorable!” jimmy squealed, he was the most teenage-girl-grown-man you had ever met. his hand opened one of the drawers in the faux desk he sat behind, pulling out a small blue camcorder.

the camcorder.

you know how on tv shows, there is special footage? sometimes it’s just behind the scene specials but sometimes- sometimes - it’s footage the actors document when they were just having fun? yeah it was one of those camcorders.

the camcorder was brought in by the two other co hosts wyatt oleff and finn wolfhard (i know this cast is sooo original not really) they played jaedens two best friends on the show. while they weren’t filming, they’d dick around and talk about stupid stuff. you’d never seen what they filmed, but you had been featured quite a few times; their by them pranking you, or invading your personal space.

you looked over at jaeden, you watched his adam’s apple bob and a thin layer of sweat flush over his face. he bounced his leg slightly, a habit he had picked up from you.

“let’s just review our material here” jimmy teased, his tongue darting out between his teeth. the video began to play, the sound was loud; assumingely for jaeden quiet voice in the tape.

the video started with wyatts unsteady hand, him and finn were running around set, they stopped at jaeden, he was playing on his phone in his trailer.

“jaeden wesley we have come for you” finn yelled. you could see jaeden shoot up from his chair. “hey guys” he waved. they talked for around a minute, jokes and all. then finn started to giggle, wyatt zoomed in on jaedens face.

“so jaeden, how’s y/n?” he chuckled, jaeden blushed “she’s ok i guess dunno.” wyatt stopped zooming in when the only thing in frame was jaedens head. “the kiss was good hm?” wyatt asked. jaeden continued to play on his phone, he nodded. “yeah, she’s pretty cute too.”

the video cut to another segment, this was filmed after the sex scene. you knew because jaeden laid on the bed you, in the same underwear that he wore during the scene. the boys were jumping on the bed, and jaeden took the camera and talked to it.

“this is for memory and memory ONLY! h-hey y/nnn” he was talking to the camera like it was you “you’re amazing and cool” you could hear finn explode into laughter as he stole the camera back and started running “yeah! and he wants your babies and loves you so much-“ “SHUT UP FINN!!!” and jaeden chased him around.

the video was taken off the screen. your face had become close to ghostly white. it was weird, it was almost like he was dumb enough to think finn wouldn’t give jimmy this blackmail goldmine. you looked at jaeden, he hit his bottom lip until it was red, he itches his neck and laughed it off.

“yeah ok-ok jimmy, maybe i liked her back in the day” jaeden tried so hard to be casual, but jimmy hit him with a heart stopper: “but mr martell, the last clip was filmed less then a month ago!”

your mind flickered with memories and ideas of him.

your first time meeting, how good his hand felt in yours. when you wiped icecream off his chin, and him dotting icecream on to the top of your nose. the way his hair always fell perfectly above his eye brow. and SHIT how he always smelt so fucking good. how he let you fall asleep in his arms and how he never complained when you put on some stupid romcom and-

“y/n?” jimmy questioned. “huh?” you spaced, come on y/n you gotta stop doing that. “i asked how you felt about all of this.” “well, there isn’t a right word i can use.”

jaeden took this has a bad reaction, he did a small wave to the crowd and stood up to get off the stage.

you stood up, grabbed his hand, and laid one right on him. kissing him felt normal, but now that there was emotion behind it, it just felt so right.

you both stopped for air, the crowd went wild. jimmy was clapping too, you could barley hear them, your heart was pumping throughout your whole body. you swore jaeden could hear it.

after the show, you sat in your dressing room for a bit, contemplating the events of tonight, and how they were all broadcasted for your embarrassment. but it was only the beginning. only the beginning of what was to come for mr. and mrs. jaeden martell.

#jaeden martell #jaeden martell fic #jaeden martell x reader #jaeden martell fluff #jaeden wesley #jaeden lieberher #jaeden #jaeden fic #bill denbrough #bill denbrough x you #bill denbrough fanfic #it move #imagine #it fanfiction #aged up

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dancingisdangerouss · 2 years

Note

If Into the Black had a soundtrack, what songs would be in it?

Okay, I got really excited by this ask and had to take some time to think about it because I went maybe a lil' overboard, but here's what I've got! Putting a Read More since 1. There's some dark sexual content and 2. It's a long post lol

-Into The Black (obviously) by Chromatics is the main theme of the fic, and I strongly encourage listening to it during some of the darker scenes; I feel like it fits very well for the rape scene in my most recent chapter--like if it were a film or something, I could definitely hear that song playing during the parts where he's fucking Reader and she's just lying there crying and realizing the exact gravity of the situation. It’s very sad when you pair them together, as you see Reader is less snarky and hotheaded during that scene and more…not necessarily defeated, but resigned.

(On the twisted but also stupidly funny side of that one, I feel like The Grabber was 200% thinking of the song Unchained Melody by The Righteous Brothers during that whole "romantic" deflowering scene. I'm not gonna lie, I actually listened to that song while writing parts of that scene, so if you're wanting to read it more from his perspective, I'd recommend doing that).

-Black Walls by Chromatics is another theme-type song that I feel like doesn't connect to a specific scene, but I feel like the lyrics and vibes are fitting for the fic.

-Red Riding Hood by Elysian Fields is another that could fit into multiple of the abusive scenes where Al is sexually assaulting Reader, but could also serve as a general theme song/credits song. But I feel like this song really fits the creepy dynamic they have, especially during the scenes where he's undressing and using Y/N.

-Black Balloon by Goo Goo Dolls. This is actually one song that I picture for during a later scene that I can't spoil just yet! So maybe ask me again later and I can tell you which one it's for. I've always loved this song to death, so I'm glad I have an excuse to finally use it. **FUN FACT: I originally was going to call this fic "Baby's Black Balloon," based on this song, but felt it needed a darker title.

-One Way or Another by Blondie. I can really picture this playing in the beginning of the fanfic, and during the scuffle between Reader and The Grabber, it just seems fitting to me for the scene somehow. Maybe the lighthearted humor of Y/N literally springing onto this dude's back and attacking him, only for the music to cut out as she's knocked out...Mm. I should have gone into Cinematography ahaha.

-Lady Marmalade by Patti Labelle. I can picture this during most of the scenes involving Lori. Not sure why, it just seems fitting to her scenes, particularly whenever she's a Woman on a Mission trying to find Y/N.

-9 to 5 by Dolly Parton would 100% be a background song for Lori. I can especially see it as a montage scene playing behind her as she's harassing all her neighbors, with them all slamming doors in her face as she drives them all crazy with her...mm, intensity, haha.

-Lovely Cup by GroupLove. I feel like this would be one of the songs playing from Al's perspective. It's just so upbeat and fun and definitely one of my all-time favorite songs, but if you listen to the words, it's like "Oh, that's...um. Hmm." I could see it playing during any of the scenes where it's from Al's perspective.

-Rock On by David Essex. I can see this one playing during the scenes where Y/N is wandering the basement, trying to break shit, find secret passageways, and make the phone work.

-Every Breath You Take by The Police. As far as scenes go, this is one I see for a later scene I have in mind that I cannot share with y'all yet for the sake of spoilers. But hey, the song in general is pretty much 100% exactly how Al is toward Reader.

-Popcorn by Hot Butter. I see this one playing during the montage of Y/N trying to make all her escape plans as they're failing miserably one by one. I don't know why it makes me laugh to think of it.

-Jack In The Box by Elysian Fields. Another that may play during some of the transitional scenes where Y/N is alone in the basement, contemplating her sanity. This song actually fits more with some of the later scenes in the fic, as she's not falling for The Grabber but is starting to understand that escape is looking less and less like a real possibility.

-Jenny Was a Friend of Mine by The Killers. I can picture this song playing over a montage of the continued sexual assaults that Y/N is to experience. It isn't necessarily all that fitting to what's happening, since the song is about murder, but I dunno, the beat of the song and the dark connotations make it easy for me to see it playing over a montage of sexual abuses.

-I Will Possess Your Heart by Death Cab for Cutie. Another song I'm adding here but can't elaborate on the specific scene in mind for the sake of spoilers ;)

-All I Need by Radiohead, This Maniac's in Love with You by Alice Cooper, Polly by Nirvana, I'm on Fire by Bruce Springsteen, Run For Your Life by The Beatles, and Closer by Nine Inch Nails are all songs that I listen to for help getting into Al's mindset. Like, most of these are pretty much songs from Al to Y/N, and they're all horrible, as one would expect.

-Insane by Black Gryph0n and Alastor's Game by The Living Tombstone are not for the soundtrack, but they are some recommended bonus songs I like to listen to when I'm writing content for The Grabber; they're both based on Alastor from Hazbin Hotel, but I feel like they're also fitting to Al's unhinged personality.

If anyone happens to be interested, I do also have some songs I've compiled that I feel like The Grabber would have given as a fucked-up playlist toward Y/N regarding how he feels about her, but I didn't want to clog up this post more since that's not what was asked. So feel free to inquire if interested!

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burnedbyshoto · 4 years

Text

good little omega

— He was an alpha, you were an omega. Can I make it anymore obvious? He was a crime boss and you were a movie star. What more can I say? Oh, he wanted you, really wanted you, but you swore you would never, ever need an alpha.

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pairing: alpha!shigaraki tomura x omega fem!reader

warnings: 18+, smut, abo/omegaverse, chad alpha!shiggy, virgin celeb!reader, kidnapping, drugging, sex slave auction, biting/marking, belly bulge, knotting, sex toys, heat, implied murder (lol rip shigsters last omegas), mind break, breeding, degradation, finger fucking, fucking in front of a crowd, modern world!au

word count: 6,174

a/n: this goes out to my shiggy stans. I never understood you until recently and now I blush like a schoolgirl when I see him. mondays are so busy, are they not? ive been home for 6 hours today wtf????

kinktober day 12 main kink: abo/omegaverse | kinktober masterlist

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You sat before the mirror, your eyes intently staring at your reflection. The people around you running around, chaotically bringing brushes and pencils to your face, the smell of chemicals in the air, tickling your overly sensitive nose.

“Are we ready?! Is Y/n ready?! I don’t think she’s ready?! We need to be out of here in five minutes, people, let’s hurry it up!”

Breaking your gaze from your reflection onto your agent in the background, you sighed softly at the growing sour and distressed omega pheromones. Oh, you realized suddenly, your nose unable to keep from scrunching at the mildewy detergent scent, they were really stressed out.

Today was the night of the biggest award show one could attend as a movie star celebrity in Japan. The Motion Picture Awards gave only the most prestigious and prodigious actors and actresses their due. A night of fashion, alcohol, and nervous pheromone pumping alphas and betas in a single room to reveal who was the best this year. Working in an industry such as your own, you had become quite the living legend already at the mere age of twenty-two.

As an omega, you grew up in a society that banned you from enlisting or attempting to join the ranks of the best in just about every field of focus or study. So that even included the area of acting. Casting Directors had always said the same thing each and every time you were forced to present your secondary gender to them all when being called back for auditions.

‘Omegas can’t be movie stars, your heats are too often and too long, they cause rifts in filming schedules this project cannot afford.’

‘We have too many prime alphas on set. Our film's projected main character is an alpha, we wouldn’t want to be caught up in a lawsuit should she find you to be too… fertile.’

‘Omegas can only be good, suitable nurtures and well, mothers. This movie just seems a bit too intense for a little omega like you!’

Omegas can’t do this, omegas can’t do that. Alphas, the pride of society, couldn’t be made to hold themselves back to your alluring scent and occasional heats. Betas, the majority of the population, didn’t feel a challenge when working alongside omegas. Omegas? Well, if there were any that actually existed within the film industry, they were for sure never heard from, or seen of.

At the age of eighteen, you had nearly given up on your long aspiring desire to become the first omega actor or actress to ever grace the scene. But just as you were ready to tell your agent that you were tired of all of the same, repetitive bullshit, a gentle alpha had approached you with an exciting role in mind for you.

Movies and cinematic films had always showcased omegas as sweet, nurturing individuals. For the most part, you agreed that that’s how you omegas were. You enjoyed hugging your close friends, scenting them softly as means of a small pack you had created as none of you were mated this young, yet didn’t ever wish to be bothered by self-righteous alphas or betas. Through many, many biology courses revolving around your secondary gender, you knew that the hormones that made you an omega also affected the brain to accept and view things in a… softer light. But unlike what they taught in school, and unlike what the alphas in society knew about omegas as they could never honestly watch an omega in heat while alone, was that omegas weren’t always the most nurturing or kind.

The week before your heat, the week of, and the week following your heat, you were always irritable, angry, almost cold. You’d flash your small fangs at anyone who dared to approach you with a scent you hated, your heat room never once escaping with everything torn to shreds, and you definitely did not wish to seek any fiber of soft love.

So when the alpha male sat in front of you, a single fang poking out of his lip as he exposed his neck in a motion of vulnerability and conceding to you — the omega — you knew he was serious.

He explained to you his plan on creating a more realistic movie surrounding the brutal truths of what being a single omega was like. Films had, after all, had always depicted omegas as being mated the moment they presented and going as far as saying that there were others means to be coupled to other alphas without actually being marked. It was atrociously wrong of the omega lifestyle, and it always made your stomach curl to see that it was an alpha or a beta actor putting on the role.

But he wanted to focus on the realities. The anger, sadness, and horrors you could face as a single, unmated omega. The director raved that you were the face for that movie and had a soul that made him come seek you out. And without so much as consultation from your agent, you agreed on the spot.

The title of the film had been an ironic one. Good Little Omega was what it was called in the end.

All in all, the movie had done poorly in the eyes of the critics. Many individuals — namely alphas and betas — claimed that the depiction of omegas within the film had been horribly wrong. Omegas were never sad, never homeless, never abandoned by society! That’s what they had all cried the moment the trailer flashed with bright letters:

AND INTRODUCING: Y/L/N Y/N (Ω)

Still, the movie made billions as many went to watch it because they ‘needed to see how horrible the movie was.’ They wanted proof that omegas weren’t cut as movie stars because how could someone who was out of commission for a week every two months be proactive on set. But all they got was a cinematic masterpiece.

You had taken a claim in the industry, one while small, that hadn’t hurt that much because you were much more focused on the fact that you now were a household name. Well, that is until you were nominated for the awards ceremony you were currently about to attend, only that it was the one from four years ago.

You were the first omega actress and now the first omega nominee. You hadn’t won, but that had solidified the step you had in the door. After that, the interests to hire you in omega roles came pouring through the door.

But you were brought back to reality when the setting spray splashed against your face, your eyes fluttering when they covered your scent glands with the flesh-colored band-aids they got for you. Alphas could never complain about you being a distraction if you smelled the same as betas.

Rising to your feet, you smiled graciously to your makeup and styling team, thanking them profusely as your agent placed her hand at the small of your back and began pushing you towards the exit.

“Goodluck!”

“Thank you!”

Shigaraki glared down the table of averted eyes, and his hands brought up under his chin twitched at his annoyance.

“Are you going to say anything, or are we going to remain silent?” he asked, his voice quiet yet heavy in all of their ears as they flinched. “Don’t think you’re going to get away without giving me an answer.”

The sour smell of fearful alphas should have corroded Shigaraki’s nose. It should have done something to unsettle the way that the young head sat on his black leather seat. But as a matter of fact, the young alpha had to resist the way he wanted to bare his teeth in a bloodied smile, his red eyes slit in his cruel lust for fear.

“O-Of course not, a-alpha!” croaked one of the smaller alphas down the table. Shigaraki snapped his eyes towards the yellow-haired croony, his neck exposed for the alpha, eyes refusing to look at his leader. “I-It’s just that, um, I — I mean, we don't know w-what happened to your mate!”

“I thought I gave clear and distinct instructions that you were supposed to have found them by this meeting,” Shigaraki stated, his voice somehow growing colder, meaner yet never once changing as his hands dropped from his chin to rest on the arms of his chair. He tilted his head, watching the pathetic alphas quiver like some scared, stupid omega. “Useless. Get out of here before I change my mind on killing you all where you sit.”

The crowd of alphas left quicker than Shigaraki could blink, leaving behind the reeking smell of scared alpha pheromones.

“Tomura-kun, you killed your mate,” came the singsong giggle from behind him, and Shigaraki didn’t bother turning around, his nose and ears sharp enough to pick up exactly it was behind him.

“They’re all a bunch of pissy lackeys,” Shigaraki simply stated, his eyes rolling as he slowly fell to the back of his chair, red eyes meeting golden ones that shone with mirth and joy. “What do you want, Toga?”

Toga leaned against the leather armrest, uncaring that Shigaraki hated his personal space invaded. The young female was an alpha, much like most of the people within this gang group, but unlike the others, she had a distinct, almost terrifying way to change the way she smelled. She could smell like anyone or any secondary gender. She often preferred to smell like an omega too.

“We have a guest visiting us today!” Toga chirped, her fingers clasping together. “I wanted to introduce him!”

“Bring Giran in,” Shigaraki snapped, his eyes narrowing with no real malice for the alpha next to him who simply pouted at the surprise — not a surprise — being ruined. Giran reeked of cigarettes and cheap body sprays that, when wafted with his distinct omega pheromones, made Shigaraki want to throw up. “Hurry up.”

“UGH!”

Shigaraki’s mouth was set in a firm line, his eyes watching as one of his most trusted allies walked to the table, and taking a seat in the abandoned chairs as Toga purred in happiness, sitting on the armchair of Giran’s chair, arms enveloping him.

“Shigaraki, how are you doing?” Giran smiled, the cigarette that seemed to take a permanent residence in his teeth moving with his words. “I came bearing some great news.”

“What do you have for me?” Shigaraki simply states, his eyes focusing on the letter that is unpocketed from Giran’s pockets and placed onto the table. “Don’t tell me you’re trying to sell me your omega niece again.”

Giran chuckled, looking at Toga, who was smirking softly, “I guess he still hates that joke, huh?”

“Absolutely livid!” Toga laughed.

Shigaraki growled, his mind and his inner alpha snarling at the lack of respect to the command of his question. He outranked them, outpowered them; they needed to respect his orders.

Giran took a deep inhale of his cigarette, sliding the card over to Shigaraki, his eyes averted, but his stance still firm. “I know you go through omegas faster than a teenage boy goes through a pack of tissues, but I think this can answer the pleas you have at night.”

Observing the card in his hand, Shigaraki scowls, unsure of how to feel about the print on the invitation.

“Say the word, and I’ll get you a seat,” Giran whispers, like a sinister god begging a mere mortal to sign over their life for something completely worthless. But Shigaraki knows his worth, and more importantly, he knows in this game he outranks Giran, who would never betray him. In the slightest. He huffs, his back hunched, and his eyes looking with subdued excitement.

“Who else is showing up?”

Giran knows the seat will be wanted that instant.

“No one who could hold a candle to you, alpha.”

“Don’t make me regret this.”

“Of course not, my liege.”

The award sitting in your hand feels almost fake as if the entire night was nothing more than a heat-driven fever dream. You had won, had actually won the most significant award of the night that an actress could win!

“Oh my gods, okay, okay,” your agent muttered beside you. Her eyes glued to the shiny gold statue between your legs. “Well, I know your heat starts tomorrow, and I’ll leave you alone for a week. But I swear, y/n, as soon as your mind isn’t a full-blown lusty heat brained bimbo, we’ll reconvene, and we will make sure you are nothing but the greatest!”

“Yeah,” you breathlessly state, eyes transfixed on the prize that felt like it could melt away any second right now. “That sounds wonderful.”

The car you were in pulled up to your front door, and you felt meek excited the car in nothing but a silk robe and slippers. The dress you had worn that night had already been put back into a plastic bag to be returned to the stylist who had offered to style you for the night. You waved with an almost transfixed look in your eyes as you closed your front door behind you, your heart hammering as adrenaline still coursed through your veins as if you had just been declared the victor of the category yet again.

Placing the trophy onto the table, you sighed in a wondrous, dreamy way.

You had done it.

You had won.

Fuck all those directors who had ever said anything different.

Still deep in your thoughts, you almost missed the knock on your door, and you figured that you must have left something in the car. Walking back over to the front door, your nose curled at the lack of scent, was it a beta?

Opening the door, you don’t remember seeing faces or even a scent of a pheromone. A single cloth wrapped over your head, and before you could send out your painful, fearful moments-from-heat omega pheromones, you were knocked out.

Cold and lifeless, you sunk against their arms, bile rising up to your throat as you know exactly what was going on. You were being kidnapped.

No… please not… not after all of this had happened.

You wake up to the sound of moving feet, sneering laughter, the feeling of coarse, hot, hands on your ass and wet, simmering tongues on your lubricated cunt. The sense is vivid. You can feel the very littlest touch on your body, the layer of scented pheromones on your glands, and slick from alphas — you know it's alphas imprinting themselves on you as a mark of a claim.

You knew about this from high school; it was an extremely outdated and frowned upon version of mating and claiming as it simply turned away any sort of pursuer who wasn’t the thick pheromone individual. You also knew it was frowned upon because if multiple individuals sought mateship with the typical omega individual, it would result in a massive, unsolvable death match. But these alphas, even with layering their scent on you so thick you thought you were turning crazy, didn’t attack. No, they took languid stripes of your fresh, intoxicating slick and growled to you, maybe, how that was how slick was supposed to be.

You wanted to move, to kick the stupid, demeaning alphas in the snout before running away, but in a twist of horrible realization, you soon figured out that despite your alert mind, you couldn’t move your body. Couldn’t shift it even the smallest of bits.

“I hope all you wonderful clients have been able to taste and smell your potential mates out here!” A loud, commanding introduction voice echoed from somewhere where you couldn’t see, his voice vibrating into the straps of your legs, but you couldn’t make a sound or even open your eyes. “As you know, we have such an arrangement for you all, the best of the best, really! We don’t wish to rush, but as always, all of these events are incredibly time-sensitive, so if you would, please alphas, please come and sit down, and we’ll begin bidding on our first of seven beautiful, fertile omegas tonight!”

The words sounded foreign in your ears yet at the same time, something so familiar because this was something you omegas were always warned about. This had to be some sort of omega mate auction, and by the stench of alphas who smelled like they owned millions and killed millions, you were in no doubt somehow caught up in one of the worst ones imagined.

Two long, completely hardened fingers suddenly entered your cunt, and as if for a single millisecond, your mind and your body were able to work in tangent, your hips bucked at the sweet feelings. Oh, your eyes tried to flutter, enjoying the way the two fingers circled the walls of your long lonely cunt.

“Please, alpha, please refrain from touching the merchandise for now, please join us so that we may begin!”

The two fingers buried within your cunt as if it was their right, slowly withdrew out of your pulsing walls, and you heard the sound of sneakers against the hardwood floor and felt relaxed and sickened at how you sort of liked it.

Heat brain, you reminded yourself. Just your stupid, horny heat brain.

You were a celebrity, you mantra, a dignified star who didn’t need a beta or an alpha unless you saw it fit. Right now, as you had repeated many times to the countless amounts of reporters who had asked, you had no interest in someone to share your heat with.

“Alright, and to start off our night in a rolling go! Please, everyone put your hands together for the fertile and beautiful thirteenth in-line the Princess of Cabodia: Dayanara!”

This auction was insane, all six omegas before you all sold from a price that ranged from 198 hundred million to the one right before you who sold for one billion dollars. You were a prideful omega, and you saw worth to your abilities, smell, and looks, but were you even worth anywhere in that range?

The entire time you had been set up in who knows what, the small, overwhelming pound of your heat sinking into the depths and pores of your body was becoming heavy. You couldn’t move a single muscle still, your body still refusing to respond to the call of your body, but the seep of your slick running down the innards of your thighs, undoubtedly beginning to pool on the ground, must be embarrassing of you.

Suddenly someone spread the skin below your ass out, and you couldn’t react as something sharp and prick stabbed into your flesh. You howled in the surprising pain, and you were fast to find that whatever they had injected you with had allowed systematic movement within your body. Your eyes fluttered open as two, impossibly huge alphas grabbed you by your forearm and hoisted you to your feet.

Your neck was far too weak to carry the weight of your head, so your eyes were transfixed on the white silk of the slutty dress they dressed you in. It showed off your cleavage with no regret, and by the feel and look of it, it barely passed the bottom of your ass. Your vision swam, the alphas all over the room distorted and melting within one another as you stepped onto a stage, the spotlight on you feeling deliriously hot and melting your skin.

Your hormones, already going crazy with your heat, seemed to intensify at the small of so many capable, potent, possessive alpha pheromones that suffocated the room. Handcuffs slapped onto your wrists, and you moaned pathetically at the sting of cold metal on your skin, and you obediently followed the command of one alpha to go on your knees.

A nail slammed between the metal links of the handcuffs, practically stapling you to the wooden floor, and you whimpered at the feeling of a stuffed pillow mount being placed beneath your lower stomach. You were in a forced and easily accessible mating position with your slick and cunt exposed for all the alphas to re-smell and see.

Moaning, you shifted against the mount, your body not able to have the full movement you needed to ward off that building, insufferable heat in your core, but nothing you could do seemed to satisfy it.

“And for our biggest prize of the night, we have the one, the only, the beautiful sensation Y/l/n Y/n!” the auctioneer roared. His voice echoing in your ear as he walked over to you, exposing your dripping cunt to the crowd of alphas who had all gotten a sweet taste of your essence already. His hand came down to slap your ass with a chuckle. “Where do we start the bidding on this one, alphas? She needs no introduction, and none of you better be pussies because we know this bitch of an omega won’t take any tiny cocks as her alpha! She needs to be broken in, fucked to submission. No one likes a trailblazer… someone needs to remind of what fucking trail she’s supposed to be on. Besides, the bitch is in fucking heat, and if you don’t claim her, I just might do it myself!”

“75 million!” someone started the bidding.

You stiffened.

“75 to the man in the back!”

“90 million!” someone challenged.

“We’re up to 90!”

“125 million!”

“Do I hear another offer?”

“250 million!”

The number climbed and climbed, the same voices coming to challenge each other until finally, they rounded out to a quantity that sounded bizarre even to you.

“950 million!”

If it had been possible for your knees to give out, you would have been collapsed onto the floor, the pool of slick that continued to lubricate your cunt without a doubt drowning you as you craved the need to be fucked by someone with undoubted alpha pheromones and cock in this room.

“950 million?” the auctioneer repeated, his voice for sure carrying a shark-like grin. “Going once, going twice—”

“Five billion.”

The gasp in the crowd was undeniable, and the omega in you crooned, knowing that this alpha valued you and your omega to be the price of five billion US dollars.

“Fuck!” screamed the man who had presented the 950 million deal.

“Wowee, five billion dollars, everyone! Anyone think they can beat that?! Going once! Going twice!” The crowd remained in silence, and you shook against your restraint, the heat emitting from your cunt almost demanding to be seen and fucked through this heat week. “SOLD! The virgin celebrity, Y/l/n Y/n sold to our own Shigaraki Tomura!”

The cheers of amaze weren’t nearly as loud as the smell of reeking petty alpha.

“Come and pay up, alpha, and then you can show us… a demonstration of how you’re going to break this omega.”

“Shut up.” Shigaraku growled, his footsteps heavy in your ear as you feel him climb up the stage, and you weakly tilted your head to look at the white-haired alpha boss hand over a simple credit card before walking over to you, his eyes unreadable as he looked you dead in the eye.

He reached out a finger that raised your chin up for him to study your face, moving and tilting your head as he pleased as a small, sinister smile pressed to his lips as he dropped your head. A sharp, uncomfortable pain fell on your chin as it crashed to the floor, and you shivered at the feeling of his calloused and rough fingers running down your exposed back.

“You’re such a small omega, still stupidly tiny. I bet you’ve never thought your first knot would come from someone like me,” Shigaraki laughed, his fingers and voice ice cold. His words were soft, spoken in a way that had your omega stupidly cooing for having secret conversations with your alpha who promised to fuck you till you were carrying a litter of pups. “I hope you realize that this is real life, that I will break you, and no hero in this world will be able to fucking save you.”

“Fuck the omega!” someone from the crowd screamed, and Shigaraki glared upwards. Still, you shivered in the thought of this alpha who spent five billion dollars to make you his claiming you, fucking your stupid heat brain into mush in front of these smaller, irrelevant alphas.

“I’ll do what I fucking please,” Shigaraki snapped, but the fingers you remembered to have been the last ones to enter your slicked crazy walls seemed to be his. They moved deep within you, curling and spreading your tight, sopping wet cavern apart, letting your pathetic, chirping cries echo powerfully in the room as lusting, near rutting alpha pheromones filled the room. “For fucks sake, omega, your pussy’s fucking tight as shit! Don’t you have any real knotted toys?”

You couldn’t respond back, your body on the road to a complete shut down at the feeling of something other than silicone deep within your body, fingering and dragging against your pheromone soaked walls.

“Alpha, y-your fingers feel so good!” you gasp, your hips thrusting backward, enjoying the way his fingernails press onto your warm velvet walls. “So good, you make me feel so good already.”

“I’ve seen you all over the news,” Shigaraki growled low into your ear. “Talking about how you didn’t want an alpha, how you never needed to feel the tightness that a fat knot could bring you, and look at you now. I’ve barely touched you, barely begun to make you mine, and yet you’re already begging for me, omega.”

Your arms tug at the handcuffs, pathetically wanting them off. Exasperatedly seeking more friction from your newly bought alpha. You can’t think straight, can’t come up with a single response except the stupid apologetic, “I’m so sorry alpha, I didn’t know i-it would be y-you!”

“Don’t be shy on her, Shigaraki! Fuck the slutty omega already! Fucking knot and claim her in front of us, I want to hear the omega whore scream. It’s always hotter when it’s the first claim ever!”

“You better learn how to shut the fuck up, or I’ll kill you for interrupting my fucking session here,” Shigaraki seethed, his red, smoldering eyes ripping from yours and glaring at some loser alpha behind you. You couldn’t care. You only wanted what looked like the growing cock in Shigaraki’s pants; you wanted to feel the cock fill up your cunt, and his knot to lock you both in place.

You drooled at the thought, your loud, whimpering cries unable to keep from pouring out as the slick from your core seemed to pour endlessly from your pussy, demanding attention and a knot. “Breed me, fill me with your pups,” you begged fingers taking in his dirty fingers in your mouth, tongue wildly and uncontrollably flicking across his fingers in hopes it would be a sinking prayer of your promise to be good. “I want your knot, alpha, I want these stupid alphas to know you’re so much better than them~!”

Shigaraki’s once snarl fell when he looked at you, a slowly growing smirk falling on his face as his lips spread into a cruel smirk, one that had you moaning around his fingers as he pinched the pink muscle in your mouth before disappearing before you.

“I smelled your distress when I put my fingers up your sloppy little cunt right before the auction happened; I could tell even with your growing heat that you hated the feeling of my fingers up your pretty pussy. But look at you now, I haven’t even set you on my goddamn knot, haven’t stretched that tiny cunt to its max. You’re smelling better than a bitch in heat,” Shigaraki growled in your ear. His clothed chest pressing deliriously into your exposed back, the huge cock outline in his pants grinding incessantly into your wet core, undoubtedly leaving a damp patch where his cock ground into you. “You’re an actress, aren’t you, little omega? I bet you just needed this audience cheering your name to break your mind over this. How. Pathetic.”

And the pressure on your tongue is gone, the drool and saliva sticky and cold on your chin as you whimper for your alpha. You promised that it wasn’t right, it was just that you had been scared before, but your alpha was so strong, his pheromones so scary and mean, he could protect you and fill you up with so many pups you couldn’t help but to be excited now.

The smell of Shigaraki seemed to brighten, and you moaned when his hands pressed the white dress up, allowing for your naked ass to be seen by him and everyone who stayed to watch. Shigaraki squeezed your asscheeks away, chuckling at the way your small asshole clenched in your embarrassment and pain at how your hormone-driven heat demanded that he fuck you and knot you now.

“So fucking wet,” Shigaraki observed, his fingertips tracing the slick on your folds before a small pop told you that he licked you clean from his fingers. “Such sweet slick too, you really are a prime omega, little one.”

You whimpered, ass shaking for him to continue to touch you, to continue to fuck you more.

“I don’t think you’re ready for my knot, precious omega,” Shigaraki taunted, and his words were a sealing deal in your lusting mind. Your hips knocking backward in some sort of desperation for more.

“She won’t,” commented the auctioneer.

“I will!” you scream, eyes filled with painful tears that could only be resolved with your alphas knot and claim. “I can take your knot, alpha!”

Shigaraki makes a small noise, and you choke at the feeling of something huge, nearly monstrous, shift into your cunt. You were a virgin, but even you knew that it was merely the head of his alpha thick cock, not enough for you to be satisfied, not far enough in you to breed or fuck you properly. All the moans in your throat were slightly painful, and the tears in your eyes continued to fall as you rocked your hips backward, trying to sink yourself further on his cock, wanting him deep in your womb.

You craved him.

“Ah, good, you can take more,” came the airy, almost insane driven coo of Shigaraki, the lack of humor making your cunt flutter against his thick, long cock. “Cry for your alpha, little omega.”

With that, Shigaraki slammed into you with no mercy, his cock bottoming out into you with a powerful, edging thrust. You screamed in pain, tears leaking from your eyes, and even with the pool of lubricating slick, his cock was far too big, incredibly thick that you felt your inner walls splitting in two as he fucked you as if you weren’t in delirious pain.

Drool and tears covered your arms, your painted fingers digging into the floorboards with crazy strength that you clawed scars on the floor as Shigaraki rutted deep within you.

Shigaraki commanded you with every thrust he gave, and soon the omega in you was cooing, howling for more, the pain of having your virginity ripped from right under you having become bubbling, glowing pleasure. You screamed in pleasure, Shigaraki grabbing onto your rolling hips to slam you back onto his cock, allowing for his thick cock to hit deep within you over and over again. The angle and power he possessed with every thrust were almost inhumane, nothing your lonely heat filled nights could ever dream of recreating ever. Shrill moans and pleas drowned out the annoying commentary of your onlookers, Shigaraki’s chest still flushed against your back, his hips landing heavily on your ass that was at this point raised because of the mount beneath you.

“My alpha,” you babble, eyes unfocused, hazy, and incredibly heavy as you stared at some point on the wall, overwhelmed with the feeling of Shigaraki’s hot cock pounding in you. “My alpha, such a good alpha. His cock is making my tummy feel funny, making my pussy feel so tight. Please fill me with your children, I’ll be a good omega to you and them, I promise! I promise — I — oh myyy goddd — I promise, alpha!!!”

Shigaraki puffs up with the praise, but he continued to fuck into you roughly, mercilessly, as if you were nothing more than the breeding whore omega that he had purchased you for. The wet slaps and satisfying squelches rang in the blazing heat room, the smell of the pleasured and heat insane omega saturating deeply within his nose, and in the other's nose, the prideful smell of a satisfied alpha.

Your spongy walls clenched and spasmed against his penetrating, pounding cock, sometimes even forcibly because, by god, it was hot when his cock would twitch within your womb, especially against your cervix.

“Fuck, you’re so damn annoying,” Shigaraki snarled into your ear, his teeth biting and scraping along your neck, and you wailed when his teeth dragged over the sweet scent gland on your neck. The one and only place for mating bites to go. His hand gripped your hair, tugging your head back so that you could feel his rough facial skin rub up against yours. “If you want me to fill you with my pups, you better be the best fucking omega on this goddamn planet.”

“I can be the best! I’ll be the best!” you cried, your ass shifting backward to meet his drilling hips.

The delirious sensation of his cock rocking against your cervix slowly begins to inflate the knot on his cock, restricting his still barbaric thrusting as he made to move faster. He wanted you to cum before he knotted entirely within you.

The pressure in your stomach is scorching and impossibly tight, and he takes another long stripe at your scent gland. You tremble with need, your fingers tearing into the wooden floors. You can feel the knot on his cock swelling up, catching onto the opening of your cunt with every successive cunt, and you begin to cry, shake, and tremble as the knot becomes too big.

Your eyes cross, your tongue falling out of your mouth as you babble his name. Your walls clamp around his knotted cock with the ferocity of a vice, and your body jerks violently as you cum hard around his cock. The slick essence of your orgasm slipping out of the few lasting places open before Shigaraki’s knot fills you out entirely. Despite his cock unable to move, the swollenness of his knot preventing him from moving out of you, Shigaraki still shoves his weight into his hips, the inflated knot stretching your cock out so widely, your vision went white, and you came yet a second time.

A small pop was heard, and suddenly with a rush of thick, hot, and heavy white cum exploded within your womb, his teeth sink around your scent gland, marking you — mating you. He filled you, filled you, and filled you. His cum wouldn’t stop until your belly was swollen with his hot cum, and he eventually fell off of you with a shaky, shallow breath.

You still remained on the mount, your eyes unfocused, breaths mumbling to your alpha, a promise to carry out every single pup he gave you and would give you. You were his omega, his good little omega, and you would never disappoint your alpha. Not now, not ever.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

The next week, you opened your door with a broad smile, your usual clothes replaced with a dress Shigaraki had picked for you and a frilly white apron on as your agent was standing outside of your house, eyes wide, mouth gaped at the still bleeding mate wound on your shoulder.

“Ah, how funny!” you laughed, waving your hand as you sighed dreamily, your eyes fluttering at the thought of your alpha who was on a business call right now. “I’m actually going to be quitting! My alpha and I have many plans right now, I gotta produce as many litters as I can, being an actress would never give me this sort of meaning in life!”

“B-But, you’re doing so much?! You have so much to do! You can’t give up?!”

“Oh, my love, we both know that I look much cuter with a pregnant belly! Don’t worry,” you smile, taking your agent's hand, brightly smiling at her one last time. “I’m sure all omegas will eventually find their alpha so they won’t be so depressed and angry like I was!”

Your agent doesn’t get another word in.

You slam the door in her face, your hands already resting on your belly that you knew was already growing the life of your first litter of pups. It had been known the second Shigaraki filled you up anymore.

You were a good little omega, and your alpha needed you!

#shigaraki x reader #shigaraki tomura x reader #shigaraki smut #bnha #bnha x reader #mha #bbs kinktober 2020

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hoodieofholland · 3 years

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Maybe can u write something like reader and Tom broke up a while ago and Tom finds sex tape so he gets emotional and horny at the same time and he realise how much he misses her ?

a/n: sad and horny sounds like how i feel whenever thinking about tom and the fact that my fics are just fics lol jk anyways, hope you like it and thanks for requesting :)

NSFW CONTENT BELLOW

Warnings: angst and sad stuff, mentions of smut, language, broke up

The house was quiet, filled with the feeling of lost that has consuming Tom for the last two months. It's been hard, he made no attempt to lie to anyone who asked. It was hard to face the fact that you were no longer there.

You and Tom were in a relationship for three beautiful years, until... you weren't. Something was off, but he couldn't say what. Both of you just split apart gradually, till the day you said goodbye.

Tom tried to come up with something to distract his mind from the thought of you. He played golf twice a week, spent some time with Harrison and his brothers, watched some movies alone. And it was starting to work. He felt like moving on for the past three weeks, not thinking about you all the time.

But there was one thing he started doing tonight that seemed to bring him down again. He sat down with his laptop and scrolled through some of your memories together. It wasn't his intention at first, but he had nothing to do and was too off to watch a movie or hang with his mates, so he just thought about organizing his files when his eyes crossed with the fold that held some of his old photos. There were plenty of pictures and videos that you took. He promised himself he would drop it off, but he just couldn't take his eyes from the screen when a video came to his view.

"Stop filming me!", you yelled in a high-pitched voice while giggling at the camera Tom was holding.

"Well, miss, would you mind telling me why I thought it was so interesting filming you in this lovely evening?" Tom's voice came through the speaker, and he smiled when you bite your lips to hide a sheepishly smile.

"I burned a whole batch of cookies down", you muttered, quite amused for your lack of skills in the kitchen. Your boyfriend laughed hard and you did the same. "Shut up, dork. I'm calling Sam".

"Yeah, you better, or we're not gonna eat anything", Tom teased and you shoved his chest. "Just kiddin', love. C'mere".

And then Tom, sat on bed, lost the smile on his lips. In the video, you two were kissing, and you had an amazing smile while pecking his lips.

"Love you, darling".

"Love you too, Tommy. Now, stop this video and make this british ass useful".

He breathed heavily, determined to stop it. He was doing good now. Or at least the best he has done since you went away. But it was good enough to carry on, and he was risking it again.

But then he saw a couple of interesting frames from other records and decide to click on each one of them.

"Oh, what is it that we have here?", he said to the camera, walking inside the room and pointing it at you. You were in front of a mirror, a new lingerie playing in display for him and the camera. "Wow, darling. Didn't tell me you were putting on a show tonight".

Tom was amazed by the way both of you were so bold to each other, so comfortable with talking to a camera, while you bounced your hips in a sensual manner to him with a teasing yet sweet smile on your lips.

"It was supposed to be a surprise, Tommy", you say, resting your hands on your hips. "What you think, though?"

"Well...", he sighed dramatically and you laughed. "Can you turn around one more time for me, love? So I can give my final opinion".

You shake your head in disbelief, half laughing at his attempt, but oblige his ask.

"I think you're bloody stunning, darling. Fucking hell, how did I get so lucky?"

Tom shifts on his spot uncomfortably, feeling a light pressure on his chest at the memory of your laughing and blushing at his sassy comments.

"Yeah?", you smiled, and by the way your arms were stretched in the video, he can tell you were tugging on the collar of his shirt. "Mind stop recording it and showing me how much of a lucky man you are?"

"Fuck, dar-" and the video ended. Sat there, Tom knew pretty way what happened next. He remembered the taste of your skin when he tried to take your panties with only his teeth, tongue tracing a wet path on the softness of your hipbone.

He takes a deep breath, too aware of how fucked up he was feeling right now. He should have stopped, he knew that, but now, he just felt like another video couldn't hurt much more.

He was definitely wrong.

Bringing himself to play the next one, an older video, he realized he didn't remember about that one. It started with your face, smiling at the camera while fixing something behind it.

"Okay, I think it's alright...", you said, licking your lips as you clasped your hands together. When you stepped back, you were wearing only bra and panties, and Tom was laid on the mattress, hand over his visible bulge, stroking himself lazily over his boxers as his free arm rested behind his head.

"You look so beautiful right now" he said, groaning a little. "C'mere here, baby, can't wait much longer".

"Patience, eager boy. Save some for the camera", you giggled while crawling on bed to sit on his lap.

"Fuck, can't believe we doing this", he said, hands automatically running down from your hips to your ass. He gives it a firm slap and squeeze. "Gonna treat you just right, so you won't need any video to remind you who made you feel this good, baby".

Tom had completely forgotten that he still had that video saved in his laptop. He suddenly felt flushed for watching it after you broke up, but then again he couldn't take his eyes off the screen when you were taking out your bra, freeing your pretty boobs.

The sounds of your whines and moans filled the room now, and Tom could swear he felt your touch just by the way he remembered of how good it was. Watching you so intense, so given to him, he started to feel his cock hardening by the thought of you riding him like you did that night.

"Fuck", he mutters to himself as he watched you being flipped on the mattress when the pleasure was too much to take and your legs too weak to keep going. In the video, Tom started to fuck you, one of your legs wide open for him and your eyes rolled back as you tugged hard on his biceps to keep yourself steady. Watching the scene, Tom brought his hand over his crotch and started to feel a bit of what he was feeling that night, as he palmed himself.

Right now, Tom knew he had taken a path that was no longer healthy. He so desperately needed to feel you, to touch you. He missed you. He missed the way you would moan his name, they way your hands would grip on his hair when he was eating you out, the way you laughed when something came wrong in the moment, but kept so horny that it wouldn't matter. He missed you and all the affection that you both shared when having sex.

"Tom, I'm gonna-" you moaned loud. It was almost pornographic, but surely was better than porn. For a second, Tom thought about getting off with the video. He was fucking horny at this point, after all, and he knew damn well that if he touched himself it'd be you on his mind all the time anyways. Besides, he hadn't fucked since you went away. But then again, when it was coming to an end, he felt sad, watching you both reaching your highs and holding each other for dear life. It was intimate and beautiful. He missed that too.

"Need to turn off the camera, darling", he said, breath still heavy as he propped his hand on the mattress. You held him closer, not giving him a chance to move.

"Not yet", you breathed out. You still wanted to keep yourself full of him, feel his cock inside of you. "I'm not ready", you bite your lips and smile when he nodded and gave you a kiss on your cheek. "I love you, Tom".

"Love you so fucking mu-"

Tom shot the laptop down, eyes tearing up as he felt the clench on his chest. Fuck, he missed you more than he was willing to admit, more than he wanted to. The images of you close to him, whispering his name, it wouldn't leave his mind even if he closed his eyes tightly.

Tom knew that night would be long, and he just hoped that he might feel you close to him in that way again.

*************

Taglist:

@pinkrockstar19 @onyourgoddamnleft @spideyspeaches

@miraclesoflove @zspideyy

#tom holland #tom holland blurbs #tom holland imagines #tom holland fic #tom x reader #tom holland smut #boyfriend!tom #request #anon

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