#can i legally tag this as animation despite there being no art

[brokenkingdoms]

guess who had to put parental controls on YouTube because someone was constantly distracted and unable to animate. On the other hand, now I'm getting distracted by tumblr.

[cowboy-robooty]

good evening. instead of writing 1000 words of futanari on male smut tonight to settle in, i shall add "homophobic gay man" to my laundry list of allegations (gaslighter, manipulator, thumb rhythm game player, the stealing candy from babies incident, etc).

guys imma be so ngl rn i #won because they took the bl tag off the summer hikaru died 😄

MY LEGAL NAME IS FUDANSHI SUPREME BUT THE SUMMER HIKARU DIED IS MILES BETTER WITHOUT THE BL TAG BECAUSE WELL..... ITS NOT REALLY ABOUT BOYS LOVE LIKE OBVIOUSLY ITS SO INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT HOW YOSHIKI WAS IN LOVE WITH HIKARU BUT LIKE JUST BECAUSE ANNA BEING MADLY IN LOVE WITH TANUKICHI IN SHIMONETA IS A MAJOR PLOT POINT THAT DONT MEAN SHIMONETA IS A ROMANCE ANIME.

look the summer hikaru died is absolutely fucking fantastic it is incredible the story is gripping the characters are wunderbar the art is gorgeous i think that the yokai elements are wonderfully mixed in and you feel a genuine sense of fear and unease at times imagining yourself living in this town thats slowly unravelling at the seams. theres no debate about how fucking amazing the summer hikaru died is okay genuinely it rises above the rest but also i think that taking off the BL tag was such a win because yoshikis ongoing mourning of hikaru is literally the main plot focus and its so much more interesting when you can see it as more than just "doomed yaoi". yoshiki obviously regrets never being able to tell hikaru his romantic feelings and definately mourns the boy he loved but its so much more than that because more than missing his crush he misses his best friend. hikaru was yoshikis best buddy they were for real best friends and people tend to always act as though romantic feelings are superior in depth to platonic ones when thats not true at all. if anything i think yoshiki misses "hikaru my best friend" more than "hikaru my crush" because he had two sided best friendship and they were eachothers player one and two. Sometimes your crush will move away and its heart breaking but when its one sided you can endure, but a best friend? Your best friend is the shoulder you cry on. the guy you give the other half of your popsicle to. the guy who remembers you prefer extra ice in your drinks and dislike cola for the weird feeling it leaves on your teeth. Hikaru was yoshikis right hand man and now hes been replaced by someone who looks and walk and talks and has all the same facets of hikaru except his soul. In fact I think the only reason Yoshiki can't accept Hikaru *IS* because he was his best friend. Because despite the fact that this "Hikaru" is exactly the sams to Hikaru in practically every single way; yoshiki still can't accept him because his best friend can't be replaced. This manga has put Yoshiki is such an interesting and complex deliemma. Because yoshiki is stuck in this strange mix of convoluted feelings where he begins to love "Hikaru" as a seperate entity from Hikaru, but it feels as though this love is being pried out from a sticky sludge that is his original love for the real Hikaru. Yoshiki initially could only go through all of this out of his internal desire to cling to Hikaru, despite the fact he bears the knowledge everyday that he's just spending time with something that just reminds him of his best friend. And his care + empathy for the "Hikaru" next to him is something that originally was only a by product from his love for the original goods, but by now in the story he literally has admitted that he has grown to love "hikaru" seperately. When I started writing this post it was April lol and then this sat in my drafts forever, so now this got said out loud, but before it got said out loud you really could feel the jumbled and confused emotions Yoshiki was enduring regarding "Hikaru". It's something I don't even think I can put into words, but it was communicated so well through the author's story telling abilities. All these feelings can't be summed up in just Yoshiki having a crush on Hikaru. He feels so much more than that. To me at least, I think that this story is elevated by Yoshiki having a crush on Hikaru, but could still have happened if he didn't. While the vice versa could not be true. It makes me upset when this story gets boiled down to toxic yaoi and everyone ignores the fact that their best friendship is so deepy important (if not MORE important than the romantic intentions) when it comes to Yoshiki's emotional strife regarding the original Hikaru.

[xx-hyper-cryptid-xx]

WELCOME 2 THE BLOG!!

꒰・🦴・꒱ WARNING; THIS BLOG WILL CONTAIN FLASHING LIGHTS AND BRIGHT COLORS. IT'S A STRONG FACET OF MY IDENTITY!! ꒰・🦴・꒱

꒰・🦴・꒱ ABOUT ꒰・🦴・꒱:

NAME;; Kettu

NICKNAMES;; Kit, Neon, Pawppy, and if u r an old friend of mine u may know me as Julia!

PRONOUNS;; rawr/rawrs, it/its, soda/pop, nya/nyan, paw/paws, sparkle/dog/sparkledogs, and more [my gender hoard can also be found via the link in text]

SPECIES;; fox/wolf/angel/demon, sparkledog

AGE: bodily 19, always 12-15 {agefluid syskid}

꒰・🦴・꒱ FICTIONAL OTHERS꒰・🦴・꒱:

Amu Hinamori (Shugo Chara)

Ikuto Tsukiyomi (Shugo Chara)

Sans (Undertale) also some AUs of him!!

Direhowl (Palworld)

Bakugo (BNHA)

Miku (Vocaloid)

Rin (Vocaloid)

Len (Vocaloid)

Teto (UTAU)

Toru (Maid Dragon)

Lucoa (Maid Dragon)

Kyle (Animal Crossing)

Rambly Racoon (Indigo Park)

꒰・🦴・꒱ OBJECT PARTNERS ꒰・🦴・꒱:

Jae (Skelanimals wolf)

I follow from -> @wolvesbaneandbuttercups !!

꒰・🦴・꒱ THIS BLOG IS ABOUT ꒰・🦴・꒱:

Self shipping

Scenemo

Sparkle furs

Furry shit in general!!

y2k

kidcore, webcore, other aesthetic and -core type stuff

꒰・🦴・꒱ LINKS ꒰・🦴・꒱:

Sys website

My carrd

SpaceHey

Buy a sparkle dog comm from me!!

꒰・🦴・꒱ BLOG WARNINGS ꒰・🦴・꒱:

Aside from what was warned about at the top this blog includes:

some discourse

drug use

furry x human, bodily adult syskid x (bodily aged up) minor, and sentient feral x anthro self shipping!! **

some horny posting*

ALL WILL BE TAGGED ACCORDINGLY (see tag list below)

** see this post where I talk about it

꒰・🦴・꒱ TAG LIST ꒰・🦴・꒱:

#kettu posting -> normal chatter

#kettu arts -> my art!

#discoursey -> discourse topics

#after bark -> horny posts* (minors should block this tag, if i find a blog belonging to a minor interacting with posts tagged like this I will block them from both main and here)

#self ship -> self ship content!

#f/o -> same as above

#feral selfship -> feral (4 legged furry) selfshipping

#[*INSERT F/O NAME HERE*] -> I tag posts with my f/os name in them when it's about them. This includes reblogs if I'm thinking of a specific one or general posts!

#nepeta takeovfur -> my bestie headmate Nep posts something

I don't usually tag reblogs

*I am legally an adult and despite being a syskid I have the full capabilities of an adult such as consent for nsfw stuff.

꒰・🦴・꒱ THINGS I STAND FOR ꒰・🦴・꒱:

endogenic systems are real

shipcourse is forever stupid (dont label me as a stance either, im none of them including neutral. it makes me severely uncomfortable)

P.L.U.R for all!

pro paraphile but kids/animals/the dead cant consent

consent is key

harm reduction is the start to recovery

transspecies and transage/chronosian is valid

Some transIDs are harmful to transition to fully, and some shouldn't be used for fun

P.L.U.RQueer <- link goes to my MOGAI blog for edits to an archive.org page of our ____queer stance.

All syskids are different! some r literal kids and some arent, don't assume!

Some, not all, transIDs ARE harmful

from the river to the see, Palestine will be free 🇵🇸

tag your shit!

And most importantly:

[mdhwrites]

I Will Never Be a Hoyocreator Because I Am a Writer

This somewhat a lamentation more than it is even criticism of Hoyo or even myself. It's not even saying that I couldn't potentially care enough about any of their games to do more stories for them. I'd love for people to submit story ideas for Fuqing, Bronseele, Zhuyabi, Guishang, etc. because I have lots and lots of pairings I like and there are just fun elements of their worlds that I could play with if I got pulled just a little harder.

No, it's more that Hoyo has no interest in its writing community from what I can tell. As an example, the GIANT creator competition that had animations, art, comics, etc... Didn't include writing. They did a 3D modeling focused one for Penacony. Still no writing. Hoyofair has no writing component. As far as I know, writers are simply not a part of the official Hoyocreator tag, to the point where one artist I've followed has reminded his fans that they need to show more respect to the fanfic writers of the community.

Unfortunately, it's not surprising. At all. On a lot of levels. It's pretty much all business but different angles. The first is bang for your buck. Currently, very few, if any, social media platforms really incentivize long form writing. They're almost all much more geared towards more visual, immediate forms of creation, to the point that the one that spooked all the others was the one who has like a cap of two minutes? What the fuck is a writer supposed to do with that besides like two paragraphs narrated? For a company like Hoyo who works with these creators, artists, video creators and even singers are simply a better investment for getting people into your games.

Second is just how good is writing as a marketing tool? How many of you read fanfiction of things you don't already know about? Even with official books, how many people's first introduction to Star Wars were its books? Or Halo or Magic, etc.? Written works within a universe are commonly pretty fucking insular and more for those dedicated to the work. You're not going to really use it effectively as an add, unlike this. (And yes, this is a real ad that plays on Youtube for Zenless. That's not me throwing shade, just that I first found it because of it being an ad.)

And if you're going "It doesn't matter if it's a good story," well... Are you calling all of my works bad stories? Because getting someone into a work for an established property they aren't already into is just like trying to get them into an original story and despite a LOT of people loving my fanfiction, it has never translated to mass migration to my original works. That's because without that immediate connection and incentive of it being a world and characters you already know and love, the barrier to say yes is DRASTICALLY higher.

The third big reason is legal. While fancomics can run into this a bit too, most companies just straight up aren't supposed to acknowledge the existence of fanfiction. This is because if one of your writers acknowledges having read something that then happens to line up similarly to something that you actually have happen in your story, you open yourself up to being sued for having stolen the person's idea. It's why game companies don't want you to send them your ideas on a fighting game character or a new Pokemon because suddenly, they can't make something even similar to that without opening themselves up to liability. Writing is the one where this can most easily happen on accident but also have some of the strongest case for those accidents. As such, most companies just stay far away from it.

But... That doesn't really make it sting any less, does it? To know that within your community, you will always be seen as lesser by the very creators of the work you enjoy. That you will never be given the same respect as the creatives who have mediums that are simply better for those companies to work with. I am not trying to even make a war or the like. I LOVE the artist communities for these games. The bops the songwriters put out are fanfuckingtastic. I ADORE that there are some content creators who are helped to make this more of a proper job for themselves because Hoyo is willing to work with their fans like this. I would like it if more companies did stuff like this and they are doing more stuff like this, like how Wizards of the Coast commissioned a good few Youtube singers to make an album of music for them.

I just wish us writers could expect to be able to join in that outside of the exceptionally rare franchise that does bother with books. Paper books though that are probably gotten through the same literary agents that anyone looking for a book to be made goes through. It's not through their communities. If you know of stories otherwise, I'd love to hear it, but until then, see you next tale.

======+++++======

I think the one franchise that I might expect to be surprised about this with would be MtG. I know they'll release books from time to time and it's not impossible those might come from their community. Then again, if it did, The War of the Spark book wouldn't have had so much no homo in it since the writer would have been able to go "People are going to get pissed about this."

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[escape-from-arcadia]

Today is my 18th birthday and I'm going to post some sappy and "cliche" shit here because I'm legal now and because I can.

If you told me five or six years ago I'd live to 18, I wouldn't believe you. I've always had a hard time imagining myself in the future, and there were genuinely times when I thought I wouldn't make it to adulthood, that my story would end short. But I'm here. I'm still alive. Very tired, but very alive.

But there are a few things that stay constant throughout your life, things you can almost always be certain of. For me, that's always been writing, art, music, and TOA.

I've mentioned it before, but I started watching Tales of Arcadia when Trollhunters first released. I saw an ad for it on YouTube, thought 'ooo pretty animation', and watched it. I was not of age to be on social media, so I never really joined the fandom or kept up to date on news about the series until 2021 when I realized "Oh shit I've never searched up the 'trollhunters' tag on Tumblr even though I've been on this hellsite since 2019 whoops". I didn't really get merch, books, or toys (because the thought those might exist never crossed my mind either).

But despite that, I loved the show and the story it told with my whole being.

And since then, I've kept up with each season and each new series. This series was there with me during the most awful years of my youth, and these characters mean the world to me. To me, part of the charm of TOA was brilliant blending of the mundane with the magical and extraterrestrial. I can't quite articulate it at the moment, but there's something about that and finding hope, strength, and light in the darkest of places that makes me feel so at peace.

The fandom isn't as roaring loud as it used to be (and the discourse is hnn), but I managed to make a few friends here. I've also had not-so-great experiences and found myself on the less-than-pleasant side of the fence, but I'm working on learning and growing and becoming a better person, and I'm making new friends too.

TOA is going to continue holding a special place in my heart, and I look forward to keeping a part of it with me into my adulthood. Obviously the important things, like Jim's cooking skills, Claire's intelligence, Toby's knowledge of geology, Aja's shredded bod, Krel's immaculate music taste, and, of course, Douxie's gender. But in all seriousness, I'm carrying the lessons I've learned from the show and being in the fandom along with me into adulthood.

Now, Netflix, can you please greenlight some TOA shorts? Please, please, please? Would really appreciate it.

[howdy-folks-its-showtime]

"Howdy folks! Take your seats please and get ready, cause It's Showtime!"

Welcome to It's Showtime! The tumblr ask blog for the BATIM inspired story of the same name! Here we have the characters in the studio, before the events of the story take place, ready to answer your questions and get into all kinds of antics! Want to learn more about the characters/story of It's Showtime? Check out its wiki/site right here! Or check out it's Gamejolt page if you want to see the game being made for it!

This blog is run by two mods, mod Whirly who goes by They/Them/It/Its and mod Roddy who goes by any pronouns! Below there is more information such as an FAQ which should help you with any question you have and elaboration on the content within the story! But if we missed anything please feel free to send asks about the project and ask blog!

It’s Showtime Is A Bendy And The Ink Machine Inspired Story That Completely Rewrites The Events And Timeline Of The Games. With The Same Characters Put Into Brand New Contexts And Relations To One Another. It Has A Character Focused Narrative And Focuses On Themes Of Abandonment, Grief, Family And Trauma, With Heavy Influences From The New York 1930s Setting.

The story follows Henry a retired animator, who after ten years comes back to his old workplace to find the place abandoned and staff missing. The walls are soaked with ink and the entire place smells of death and misery. Despite that, Henry journeys deeper and deeper into the dark abyss below, discovering what remains of his coworkers and the way grief can tear people apart…

But not even the shadows of his past, clawing at him from the dark puddles is enough to deter Henry from his attempt to find out what happened to his family and making things right…

Assuming he’s not too late to do so…

This story is meant to be rated R, the warnings below elaborate on this.

Warning this project contains: Cursing, blood, gore, body horror and death. Themes of internalized bigotry, depression, discrimination, abusive family members, grief, trauma and self hatred. Mentions of nsfw topics, alcohol and recreational substances. Traumatic flashbacks and panic attacks are depicted but abuse, suicide and self harm are discussed/implied. It should be known the ask blog may not contain these things but the story and larger project does.

FAQ:

Who are the mods? The mod team is me, Mod Whirly and my romantic partner, Roddy, we’ve been together for years and are very in love with this project and story! We have our own art blogs for personal art, but keep in mind art shown off here, even if it contains characters from It’s Showtime, should not be considered official art. Anything not posted by this blog regardless of who drew it, is considered non-canon to Showtime. If you want to look into supporting us as artists and creators you should check those out though! Obviously for legal reasons, we can’t advertise any ways to support us in a monetary sense on this blog <3. Roddy’s art blog is here and Whirly’s art blog is here!

What is this project for? It’s Showtime is currently beginning development as an indie horror game, no promises on scale or when it will come out as we are both very busy, Roddy with school and me with figuring out post high school life stuff, but I have been learning 3D animation and modeling in preparation for it. All work I’m doing currently isn’t really game ready or worthy, but every small step in development makes me more excited to one day maybe make this project a reality <3 Currently the plan is to build it in Unreal Engine. [at first it was gonna be Unity but well… If you know you know.]

Are you okay with fanart? We love fanart! If you tag us in any of your fanart we are sure to share it on the blog and sing its praises! It’s so flattering how much fanart we have already received and it makes us so happy and excited to work on Showtime when we see how beloved our designs are! If you want to make fanart please do! We would love to see it!

Who did the character designs? Who made the site? Mod Roddy did all the refs you see on the site and on the blog! They are based on my old character designs and notes I made on changing them, but overall they are very much the creation of my wonderful darling! It was the work of Whirly however to make the actual website! It’s a bit rough but I do like it a lot <3 I hope to expand it and make it better with time but for now I am very happy with it as a wiki for It’s Showtime.

What is Encore? Encore is the catch all name for all stories based on the world of It's Showtime, currently there is a BATDR inspired story we are also writing called Curtain Call that doesn’t take place in the normal timeline of It’s Showtime. So Encore is just the general name for this universe! Think of it as the franchise name.

I still have a question after reading this? Send us an ask! We’re almost sure to answer it and the more activity in the inbox the more activity in the project as well! Don’t ever feel bad for sending us questions or inquires! We like to talk to you guys!

[kelpiesummer]

Tagged by @photogirl894!  Original post here.

1. Are you named after anyone?

Nope! My legal name, nor my preferred name are named after anyone specific.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Uhhhh a few weeks ago i think. I was just really stressed.

3. Do you use sarcasm?

Yep. A lot.

4. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Their energy, and level of volume. I am an extreme empath with sensory issues and PTSD, so loud personalities can be a bit too much for me right away. I have to keep my distance and slowly adjust to them.

5. What’s your eye color?

Blue with green flecks.

6. Scary movie or happy ending?

Happy ending! I love a good scary movie, but happy endings are always preferred.

7. Any special talents?

I... don’t know. I think my ability to learn something new really fast is a special ability, but im not sure.

8. Where were you born?

Born and raised in my youngest years in Watertown, Wisconsin.

9. What are your hobbies?

Watching videos on Youtube, watching TV and movies (mostly sci-fi and animated), listening to true crime or crime drama, daydreaming about all the shit i wish i could do, playing video games, and drawing. Sometimes writing but that’s pretty rare.

10. Do you have any pets?

I do!!! She is a 17 year old shorthair black cat with bright green eyes named Twizzlers.

11. What sports do you play/have you played?

...none. I was homeschooled my entire life so i didn’t get these opportunities.

12. How tall are you?

5'5″ or 5′6″ im not actually sure.

13. What was your favorite subject in high school?

I loved Science? That was really it. With homeschool i didn’t get the “fun” subjects like art or music or anything despite asking my mom to do them.

14. Dream job?

I have a few different dreams here! - A) No job. I am living comfortably on disability, not having to worry about my ailments or mental health. With the ability to just.. craft whatever I want without needing to worry about the next paycheck. But that’s not going to happen. - B) A good-paying job i enjoy enough to not be exhausted daily. Bonus if I don’t have to work full-time. - C) True dream job! Just.. doing my crafts for work, and being able to live like this. Otherwise I would like to be a game designer. I adore creating worlds and thinking of the logic behind things. - D) Long-term dream. 200+ acres of my own private land, living off-grid (mostly - i want internet dammit), and growing myself a life with me and my partner. My job would just be to provide for myself, and my family there. Nothing more. Not gonna tag anyone to do this. If you wanna do it, go for it! <3

[terrestrialnoob]

Danny Phantom OC For YOU!

Since the Phandom likes to invent characters for no reason, I present to you: an original character made for you to use as you want! In fics, in art, in comics, whatever you want! I would like to be tagged if you use him, but that's not necessary! You can take credit for making him, I do not care!

Who?

Owen Pitch!

Professor of Ghostology! (the real life philosophical study of ghosts, spirits, and the undead and how their existence affects morality, ethics, and broader ideas of what it means to be human)

And for good measure! Has additional minor degrees in Behavioral Ecto-biology and Parapsychology.

Formerly taught Ghostology at Miskatonic University (the fictional college Lovecraft invented to study magic, the occult, and whatnot), and currently teaches both Ghostology and General Philosophy at Abromity College (the fictional college I invented, right now, that offers paranormal studies degrees) in a city that is close to, but is not, Amity Park; I think it's about a single, 1-hour bus ride away.

When he first started working as a professor, he was told he had to wear button down shirts to look professional, and he argues, to this day that, Hawaiian shirts are button downs. All other aesthetic choices stem from this fact, but otherwise have him look however you’d like. (You can even he/him-lesbian the man if you so desire, I don’t care! But he is, at his core, A Hawaiian Shirt Philosophy Professor)

How does Danny know him?

I like to imagine that, several years before the start of the series, there was a Legitimate Legal Court Case on whether the US government should consider ghosts and the like sentient creatures and how to treat them, between Owen and The Fenton Parents (or someone using their research). It was covered primarily by paranormal news reporters and some local news stations as a “wacky funny story to break up the serious news”. Owen was on the side of “ghosts, like animals, have a wide range of sentience and sapience” while the Fenton’s were on the side of “ghosts aren’t even capable of conscious”. The Fenton’s side won because Owen had to admit that “Yes, some ghosts aren’t sentient...” despite the fact that the rest of that sentence being “…but most are, and it’s a case by case basis.”

He agrees with the Fenton’s on stuff like, “What is a Ghost” and “How are ghosts made”, but that’s where the agreements end.

He is not a ghost hunter. He insists he is not a ghost hunter. He does occasionally hunt ghosts, but only to observe and interview them. He’s never tried to hurt or trap a ghost. He argues for ghost rights and that they are sentient on a spectrum and it’s not fair to treat them like they aren’t.

What’s he good for?

Other than being someone to argue with the Fenton Parents on the behalf of ghosts and possibly establish where those anti-ecto laws that got mentioned once and never again came from?

His narrative purpose is as an Exposition Mouthpiece. If there’s some random ghost lore or questions that Danny or any other character has about ghosts and you don’t know who they can or should ask, they can go to Professor Pitch of Abromity College. He's friendly and eager to share knowledge! He has a positive view of ghosts! He lives in the next town over, which is close enough to ask him questions but far enough away he does need to actively be sought out. He’s designed to be a convenient way to explain something in detail that you can’t figure out how else to get that information to the characters, or the audience, but not so convenient that he can just show up and solve problems for the main characters.

He can also show up as a convenient way to distract the Fenton Parents! He cannot refuse an argument with them about whether or not all ghosts are evil, or some such similar theory. Though, keep in mind this is literally: Professor of "Are Ghosts Evil” going against the ghost equivalent of anti-vax-parents. Should be both funny and extremely sad.

Enjoy!

[more-than-a-princess]

@awesomeuchuu​ asked: 7. “What motivates you to get to those drafts?” 8. “Any current reads you’d recommend?”

Munday Questions (It’s not Munday but there’s a lot going on offline for me right now and I could use all the good vibes. Especially tomorrow!) - Accepting

7. “What motivates you to get to those drafts?”

A few things! But to be fair, I don’t need a lot of motivation most of the time.

Writing is my escape from work and other offline responsibilities. Overall, unless I’ve hit a writers block or I’m annoyed by something on dash, I’m really happy to be here. At any given time, I’m often into some threads and interactions more than others, meaning ideas and how to continue them come naturally without having to think it over too much or plot with the other mun. But I still like what I create here: I try to only take on what I’m comfortable with, which is why this blog has fewer threads and longer turnaround times than others I’ve seen, but have longer threads and more detailed interactions as well.

In terms of process though, I keep to a content calendar (or schedule) and try to gauge my dash as to when to post and what to post. If I didn’t write nearly every day or post every day, I believe I’d simply abandon the blog altogether or drop every thread/ask in order to start anew often. I really dislike this behavior and so I do my best not to do it myself: knowing how much one can handle is important. No matter what: you can’t write with everyone you want to at any given time (for most people, at least!). There just isn’t enough time in the day to make that happen, which is why I try to cap my asks and urge those without interactions to send them in. It’s the best I can do to give as many interested muns a chance to interact.

8. “Any current reads you’d recommend?”

I miss reading actual books for pleasure. A lot of what I read now outside of work is reddit and blogs for various interests and advice (I’m reading a lot about being a first time home buyer, real estate, interest rates, and other things regarding buying property right now). I have a stack of Julia Quinn novels I’ve yet to get to and I feel like until I’m able to go on a slow-paced vacation (like the beach, despite how much I don’t like tropical beaches), I’ll never get to them all. And the other books I’ve been collecting for awhile (with another in a series I read coming out at the end of May!).

Instead, I read some online manga or manhwa during my downtime during meals or right before bed. Mangakatana is my preference, so I’ll link a few things that I’m reading that aren’t popular/made into a recent anime right now. My preferred genres are Josei and Seinen, for the most part, and I’ve tried to link titles that aren’t entirely NSFW-focused. For the ones with the smut tag, the sex is only part of the story without being the full story, if that makes sense!

Here we go, the recommendations:

A Rare Marriage: How to Grill Our Love - Slice of Life manga about a young, newly married couple in their thirties who deal with couple-y situations and day-to-day issues by grilling meat. Yes, you will get hungry. Yes, you will want to hug your significant other.

I Found Somebody To Love - Legal age difference manhwa between a college professor and a former student. Feels.

Real Clothes - Are you a fan of fashion-themed manga like Paradise Kiss and Princess Jellyfish? Read this next: it’s more industry-based than romance-based, but still great. Also see: Bibi.

Gold - Soap. Opera. Cheese. Fashion, high society, screwed up families, romantic liaisons (yes this means sex). Yes, the art looks like it’s straight out of the 80s. It’s great.

Collectors - I’ve never identified with two women more in my life based on their hobbies. One loves fashion, the other loves books, I’m wondering how to fit both into my living space (but these two seem to be figuring it out). 

Yume no Shizuku, Kin no Torikago - Loosely based on real 16th Century history in the Ottoman Empire. Smut for obvious historical reasons: the MC becomes part of a harem. Some questionable consent, in case you don’t want to read that.

Lonely Planet - That One Manga Everyone’s OC Has A FC From. But it’s a good read. To pay off her father’s debts, a high school student becomes a housekeeper for a writer.

Bread & Butter - Two thirty-somethings find love again over baking. Now that I’m in my 30s, I love when there’s older protags in romantic relationships and it’s not just them focusing on parenthood. 

Lucia and Under The Oak Tree - The two European-styled Josei manhwa I read. Fewer jokes/humor than other historical manhwa, lots of drama, some sex.

Innocent - The cooler, edgier big sister of Rose of Versailles. French Revolution with all the gore, sex, family drama, and generally screwed up situations that Lady Oscar never had to face. This one is a hard read, but a very good one. Some of the most beautiful art ever. And almost everyone needs a hug.

NOTE: This manga is split up into two different series. Read Innocent first, and then go on to Innocent Rouge. It’s the second half of the story.

An Hour Of Romance - I need the K-drama adaptation ASAP. A marketing executive and her new intern, after visiting a Korean temple, switch bodies for an hour every day and have to figure out how to stay themselves. Permanently. Freaky Friday with all the cuteness, angst, and will-they-won’t-they that K-dramas provide.

The God of Pro Wrestling - One of these things is not like the others...and this is it. I read this with my fiancé actually, who has been a wrestling fan for a long time. He gets all the WWF/WWE references that I miss (I only started watching off and on 6-7 years ago or so), but it’s a pretty fun interpretation of the American wrestling industry in the late 90s/early 2000s (based on the real-life wrestlers and personalities who have fictional portrayals here). I’m still waiting on my WWE faves to show up at some point. 

And a few more popular things I re-read or try to keep up with: Tokyo Manji Revengers, The Way of the House Husband, Princess Jellyfish, Tokyo Tarareba Girls (this one is a mood. Often.), Love Is Hard For An Otaku, Welcome to the Ballroom, Paradise Kiss, and if it ever gets updated...Nana. I miss you, Ai Yazawa. 

[snom0001inu]

You know after I made that point about A24 hiding in the shadows while Viv takes the cliff boulder from the rabid fans, I decided to see what works are being made/have been made since August of 2020. 

Currently, it is November 2020 so roughly 3 months have passed since they got involved in Hazbin Hotel. That’s not a huge amount of time, but with a studio backing you, a lot more can get done versus independently. Especially since Viv is a workaholic. 

They have 3 live-action movies in progress:

First Cow

Boys State

On The Rocks 

A24 currently hosts a live-action series called Moonbase 8 as well.

The website can redirect to other things such as podcasts, zines (?), merchandise, and even auctions! They’re keeping themselves busy despite COVID, good on them! The entertainment industry has definitely been hit the most  in terms of profit with the pandemic. 

Their official Twitter doesn’t have mention of Hazbin Hotel despite being directly tagged by Viv in the announcement. That strikes me as odd since their own website has no indication of being affiliated with Viv or Spindlehorse, or the fact that Hazbin Hotel would be their first animated series. That’s a marketing chance right there, ya know? 

SO

As someone who works customer service, lemme tell you what I suspect is happening. 

A24 is purposely keeping their distance from the Hazbin Hotel franchise to let Viv be the scapegoat. Both extreme ends of the fandom are attacking a woman who legally cannot defend herself, nor can she put the onus on her studio without facing consequences. A24 is banking on the fandom being starved so whatever happens with episode 1 will be blindly accepted, but they want Viv to deal with the backlash until that point. 

That’s just my theory, but Vivienne Medrano is overworking herself to the point of depression (based off her Twitter moodswings) and I find it disappointing that no one is attacking A24 about it. If Viv is SOOOOOO arrogant (like the antis say), why hasn’t A24 faced her wrath? If Viv is so uwu art is leif (like the stans say) why hasn’t she been able to pump out anything for her fans??? 

Stop blaming ONE person for an entire franchise when ONE person is no longer the backbone of it. Blame the company for not controlling the fans, blame the company for letting Viv overestimate her abilities, blame the company for not explaining anything despite being professionals that continue to profit and create other things during a pandemic without as much issue.

[buckybarnesbingo]

BBB2021 Week 1 Roundup!

We have been doing the BBB roundups on Wednesday, but for the ease of the mods, we’ve moved to the weekend.  So don’t panic!  

And now, we’ve got SO MANY amazing fills below, so go forth and appreciate!

If you don’t see your contribution here, that’s probably because you didn’t fill out the form.  This is a new requirement for the BBB, so maybe bookmark it.

Title: Pick You Up Collaborator: BeccEEE Card Number: B019 Link: AO3 Square Filled: U2 - Sick Fic Ship: Stucky Rating: Gen Major Tags: can be read as shippy, Can be read as gen, stomach flu, vomiting (implied), Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, skinny Steve, Pre-War, Pre-World War II Bucky Barnes, Sickness, taking care, Cuddling & Snuggling, Bucky Barnes Is a Good Bro, Best Friends, Or Maybe More Summary: On his 21st birthday, Bucky is all dressed up and ready to party. He invited two ladies to spend the night with him and Steve at the ongoing borough festival in Brooklyn. But when Bucky knocks on Steve's door to pick him up, an unfortunate coincidence and Steve's bad immune system interferes with their plans. Word Count: 2073

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Title: Where You Least Expect It Collaborator: UisceOneLove Card Number: B061 Link: AO3 Square Filled: C3 - Free Space Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Diner, Modern Bucky Barnes Summary: Bucky thought it was going to be a quiet night at the diner. Then the famous Avenger and genius Tony Stark walks in. Word Count: 1606

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Title: Bucky’s Bookstore Collaborator: snowstark Card Number: B037 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B5 - AU: Bookstore Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: Fluff, Meet-Cute, Mention of PTSD from war Summary: Bucky sets up a bookstore to deal with the aftermath and trauma of the war. One day, Tony walks into his bookstore, and they hit it off from there.

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Title: When it Rains, it Purrs Collaborator: BeccEEE Card Number: B019 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K5 - Adoption Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, veterinarian tony stark, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, Alpine, Stray Cat, slight Blood and Injury, Alpine being a cat, Winter Soldier Vol. 2 (2018), WinterIron Reverse Bang, Get Together, Sick Animal Summary: After Bucky freed himself from Hydra, he lives a modest life in a little suburb in Indiana where he makes a living by helping people to start over. His job is unconventional, dangerous and not always legal but he is glad to be doing some good in his own way. When an injured stray cat finds him one night he can't help but bring the helpless animal to the closest veterinarian. Dr Tony Stark patches her up but Bucky had not expected to become a pet owner just like that. He is not enthusiastic, not prepared and definitely not suited for a pet. Or a boyfriend. Fortunately, neither the cat nor Tony do care at all, leading Bucky down a road that holds lots of treats, fur everywhere and a handsome vet.  Or: Two men and a cat and everyone catch feelings. Word Count: 18,174

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Title: The Bounty Hunter Collaborator: velvetjinx Card Number: B081 Link: AO3 Square Filled: B1 - AU: Western Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: Implied sexual content, Alternate universe -Western, smoking, guns, mild language Summary: A handsome stranger swaggers into the bar looking for James Barnes. Word Count: 565

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Title: The Blood of the Covenant Collaborator: velvetjinx Card Number: B081 Link: AO3 Square Filled: U1 - Families of choice Ship: Stucky Rating: Teen Major Tags: Bucky Barnes Recovering, Found Family, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Knives, Swearing, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, thanos never happened, Retirement Summary: Bucky reluctantly joins Steve’s brunch with Natasha and Sam. Word Count: 500

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Title: Bucks Bunny Collaborator: velvetjinx Card Number: B081 Link: AO3 Square Filled: C1 - Were-creatures Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Were-Creatures, Werebunnies, Transformation pain, Established Relationship, Implied Sexual Content, thanos never happened Summary: Bucky got bitten by a bunny on a full moon. He really, really didn’t expect the side effects. Word Count: 509

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Title: Waffling at Midnight Collaborator: velvetjinx Card Number: B081 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K1 - Old Married Couple Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, thanos never happened, Implied Sexual Content, Loving Marriage, Light Angst, Established Relationship, Love Summary: Bucky snores so hard he wakes both himself and his husband up. Word Count: 422

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Title: The Ghost of Kitty Yet to Come Collaborator: velvetjinx Card Number: B081 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y1 - Supernatural Ship: Stucky Rating: Teen Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ghosts, Supernatural Elements, First Kiss, Cats, Ridiculous, Despite the title alpine is very much alive Summary: Bucky is convinced there’s a ghost in his apartment. Steve isn’t so sure, but is willing to help him investigate. Word Count: 443

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Title: i know it's mad but, if i go to hell, will you come with me? Collaborator: cyanica Card Number: B032 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K4 - forgiveness Ship: Stucky Rating: Teen Major Tags: homophobia, hate crimes, aftermath of violence, angst, injury, hurt/comfort, victim blaming, internalised victim blaming, blood, whump Summary: Steve loves Bucky and it’s 1941. Word Count: 2410

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Title: Wrap All Your Arms Around Me Collaborator: 27dragons Card Number: B024 Link: AO3 Square Filled: B2 - Families of Choice Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: AU: Merfolk, Families of Choice, mental health issues Summary: Tony got the team captured by airfolk, and he’s feeling lower than chum. Good thing Bucky’s here to support him. Word Count: 820

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Title: BUCK-E's Practice Collaborator: LBibliophile Card Number: B094 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Y1 - Artist!Bucky Ship: Bucky Barnes & DUM-E Rating: Gen Major Tags: DUM-E's Drawings, drawing practice, metal arm versus metal claw Summary: Bucky’s arm has been recalibrated and he needs to practice his fine-motor skills. DUM-E decides to join in.. and make occasional corrections.

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Title: Living in the World (Ain’t Easy to Do) Collaborator: velvetjinx Card Number: B081 Link: AO3 Squares Filled: Chapter 1, Y2 - Bucky with Alpine and gun Chapter 2, Y3 - It’s not your fault Chapter 3, Y4 - Outsider POV Chapter 4, Y5 - Saving Steve Chapter 5, K4 - Alley Chapter 6, C3 - Free space Chapter 7, U2 - Steve Rogers (Captain America) Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Divergence - Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Healing, Recovery, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Therapy, Bucky Barnes Has Panic Attacks, Family Feels, Implied/Referenced Homophobia Summary: From Romania to New York, Bucky is learning how to be a person again. With help from Steve and a stray cat called Alpine, he just might make it. Word Count: 3188

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Title: you're my end and my beginning Collaborator: redsixred Card Number: B098 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y4 - Futurefic Ship: Stucky Rating: Gen Major Tags: Mild Hurt/Comfort, Future Fic, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Feels   Summary: Bucky knew it was time for Steve and him to have The Talk, with capital Ts. Word Count: 728

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Title: Pet and Prize Collaborator: snowstark Card Number: B037 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Y1 - Bucky holding a gun Ship: WinterIron Rating: Explicit Major Tags: violence, gun use, mafia au, smut Summary: See, everyone knew Bucky Barnes. He was the biggest mafia boss in all of New York City, and what Barnes wanted, Barnes got. And he wanted Tony. Word Count: 1213

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Title: The Leash He Could Do Collaborator: PoliZ Card Number: B049 Link: AO3 Square Filled: U4 - Does This Belong to You? Ship: WinterHawk Rating: Gen Major Tags: Fluff, No Powers AU, amputee!Bucky, meet-cute Summary: A runaway pooch might get Clint more than just a new client for his dog-walking sidegig. Word Count: 894

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Title: bubbles and fun Collaborator: kay Card Number: B002 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B1 - Bathing/Showering together Ship: BuckySam Rating: Teen Major Tags: art, Non visible nudity Summary: Bucky and Sam take a bath and play with bubbles

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Title: Sunbathing Collaborator: SaganaRojanaOlt Card Number: B004 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: U2 - Cyborg Ship: none Rating: Gen Major Tags: Sheriff Bucky, metal arm, sun Summary: Sheriff Bucky enjoying one of the rare weathers when his metal arm can be uncovered

[mcrmadness]

🌺💘🌷 GET TO KNOW YOUR MUTUALS TAG 🌷💘🌺

Rules: When you get this, it means someone wants to know more about you, so list 5 things about yourself you want your followers to know! They can be as simple as your age or as complex as your deepest fear, as long as it’s something you’re comfortable with sharing. When you’re done and if you want to, send this to 10 people you want to get to know better!

Tagged by: @cats-crushesandhistory, thank you!!! Tagging: @stufenlosregelbar, @hanhan156, @charlotte-lancer, @autumnrebel, @cupcakecurl, @lycanrvc, - six is enough for now. I’m probably forgetting about basically everyone, I literally had to go through these by letters because I can never remember anything when I should make a list and I still feel bad for not including _everyone. But I decided to include only those who I have interacted with at least a little bit - I literally don’t dare to speak to anyone unless they tell me first that I am allowed to approach them. I also did not tag anyone who I haven’t seen doing these tag games or who I don’t know if they like these or not. And all of you can also just skip this if this is not your cup of tea.

***

I can never write anything short (surprise...) so I’ll just give you a short list here and you can click the read more link and see more of my thoughs on each topic there.

I am a teetotaler and I have never even tried alcohol. I also don’t and have never smoked and I stay the f* away from drugs, too.

I love cats. Like, for real, they’re the best thing in this whole world.

I love all animals overall, and I am actually a horse groom, I have a the “Vocational Qualification in Horse Care and Management”, specializing in harness racing, and I have worked with horses for over 10 years so far.

As a kid, I was a huge dinosaur nerd and I still love them.

I love comics and I have also drawn comics since I was a kid. I still have all of my old comics saved. Lately I haven’t been drawing even nearly as much and only fanart, tho. Drawing is fun but I simultaneously love and hate it.

Lol it seems I have love for everything but humans :D:D:D:D:D:D I didn’t even realize that before making this list looooooooool XD But yeah, more rambling under the cut :D But thanks for reading, if you end up reading it.

1. I am a teetotaler and I have never even tried alcohol. I also don’t smoke (and never have) and I avoid drugs - so much so that I don’t know if getting ADHD medication would break this “rule” of mine because they are made from the same stuff as one well-known drug...

I think it started as me just being so “lawful” all the time and the legal drinking age in Finland is 18, so I wanted to follow the rules at all times so I didn’t even think about drinking before the age of 18 and I was often very much shocked by other teens who did that, and I also remember being really worried when my best friend started experimenting with alcohol as a teenager. Despite the legal drinking age being 18, basically everyone here still started (and starts?) drinking between the ages of 13 and 15. So at school, from Monday to Wednesday, all that happened was overhearing the drunk stories of other kids. And from Wednesday to Friday, it changed to them discussing their plans for the next weekend. It was like this every week. And I never could wrap my head around it (I spent my weekends at home being happy that I could have free time and play The Sims 2 or something).

Then at some point I guess I just felt like I don’t even need alcohol for having fun and I still haven’t felt like that, and I don’t think I ever will either. When I turned 18, I was super annoyed by everyone because EVERYONE asked me “So you’re turning 18, did you plan on going to a bar?” and I would always answer something like “I don’t even drink (alcohol) so why would I?” and what still annoys me a little is people telling me “That’s good. That’s a good decision, drinking is bad.” and like... if you really think so, why do you drink yourself, then?

2. I love cats. Maybe that is partially visible from my blog too but I really, really love cats, and for decades my favorite animal has been tiger. When I was born, we had already 3 cats in the house and the last one of them died when I was almost 13 (he would have turned 16 that year). Before I moved out at the age of 23, there was not a single day without cats and currently my parents have 4 (plus a dog). I am still dreaming of my own cat but I can’t take one now because animals are not allowed in my flat but whenever I move out of this, I will choose one with pets allowed and I will adopt a cat. Most likely a rescue cat if I can find one, or even two so they can keep each other company. As cute as kittens are, adult cats are also important and need homes.

3. I also love animals overall. I actually like them more than humans (but technically humans are just apes so they’re my least favorite animal, then) and when I was 7-years-old, whenever I was asked about my dream job, I always said or wrote “I don’t know, probably something to do with animals!” And since my teens I have had lots of different ideas for jobs but when I was 25, I graduated as a horse groom. And have been (on-off) working with horses for over 10 years now (currently unemployed). Originally I chose the horse work because I was so pissed by the capitalist system and the thought of an office job or job at a grocery store and such was just... ew, no, never! So I chose horses because if I have to work, then I will do something useful and someone’s gotta take care of the animals too and I love animals, and animal work doesn’t feel like work but more like a lifestyle, so I’ve been basically fooling the system AND myself by that. Sometimes I also dream of the work as a zookeeper.

4. As a kid, I was a huge dinosaur nerd and I still love them (Land Before Time FTW). With my siblings we had a huge collection of dinosaur toys and I also have always loved evolution and genetics, so what we did was to give an individual name for every dinosaur we had. And we knew the species of each of them, and we knew so many facts about them too. Each dino also had their own personality and we even created family trees for them. There were generations of these dinos and we also created this “growing up order” which meant we put them all standing next to each other, usually under my brother’s bed because we had so many of them and they didn’t fit anywhere else lol, from the youngest/smallest to the oldest. And our biggest mission, that never got finished, was “The Big Play” which was us playing that the ancestor parents aka the oldest and biggest of our toys were born and we would play with them and play how they grow older and eventually start having their own kids - who were the next generation in our “growing up order” :D

No wonder why I still love playing The Sims games, especially TS3! (I even have a Finnish simsblog.) Lots of the things I have done and loved as a kid still live so strong in me, they just come out differently than what they did then. Imagination and toys changed to video games, especially The Sims (but I did play video games a lot as a kid too) and my love for genetics and evolution is still really strong.

5. I love comics. My favorite comic book character of all times is Garfield - he’s a cat and I grew up with cats so obviously I fell in love with the Garfield comics too, and I grew up with them as well. My mom subscribed to the Finnish Garfield comic in the early 90s and I have full volumes starting from the year 1994. I also have lots and lots of earlier comics and I always hunt for them from second-hand shops and I don’t have too many of them missing anymore, and I’m really proud of my collection. I also collect Lucky Luke, Rantanplan and Asterix - I have almost all of the (Finnish publications of) Lucky Lukes and Rantanplan.

I have also always loved drawing and I drew my first actual comic when I was 9 or 10 years old. Before that I had been drawing lots of “image series”, one image per paper. I still have all my old comics here in a drawer and I have had so many different characters and majority of them have had endless “plots” aka no plots whatsoever :D Before I actually never drew humans, I started drawing human portraits as fanart when I was 16 and the first human comic characters I drew (also as a fanart) when I was 18 or so. Before that everything was animals of some sort - I have had ants, flies, dogs, cats, birds... even ghosts at some point, and I also created one very simple anthropomorphic creature just so that it was easy to draw and I could concentrate on drawing clothes and hair. Oh my god I loved drawing hairdos to these, and so often I had one female “main character” and I gave her a “growth spurt” where I just drew her in different ages until she was “adult” and I continued telling about her life as an “adult”. Very often these differen phases were literally phases, there were soooooo many different styles each just for one year :D Then at some point I started coming up with actual ideas and plots instead of just drawing whatever I felt like drawing. I still draw comics nowadays, but those are mainly fanart and I haven’t drawn about OC’s in years and currently I have no active ones (except for the “self-comics” about my deep thoughts etc.) and I don’t know how to create new ones, I just have no creativity unless it’s provoked by a fandom thing or when I get a base like The Sims 3 where I don’t have an empty canvas but am given the tools for creating something new.

It might be fun to share some of my old comics here one day but this blog isn’t really an “art blog”, even tho I post some of my drawings occassionally. But let me know if you’d like to see some and maybe I will make a post about that in the future.

[too-attached-to-fiction]

Finding Family

Summary:            

Logan really wants kids and Virgil doesn't know how to say no to his husband.

Plus, it doesn't help that the kids Thomas befriends need their support.

Notes:    

we made another found family au because I can't get enough of it and Clam indulges me.

Updates will probably be inconsistent because we want to make each part longer, so bookmark/ask to be tagged on Tumblr!

I need fan art of this too if anyone wants to do that.....

Welcome back, readers!

Nox

READ ON AO3

~~~

Logan Sanders enjoyed getting up early.

There was something about the way the dew settled on the windows and plants, the slow sunrise. The world was quiet, and even though Earth spun 1,000 miles an hour, things seemed to stand still.

He wasn’t always an early riser, but he liked being up during hours that no one else was. On the few days he slept in, he only felt more tired. In his opinion, Logan had better things to do than sleep.

Besides, the mornings were for appreciating simple things.

Logan glanced down at his side, where his husband, Virgil, snored quietly. The purple streaks he’d had in his hair during their early grad-school years had long faded, although the morning sun showed where it used to be. Logan gave him a gentle kiss on the forehead before getting ready for the rest of the day.

Virgil was the complete opposite of Logan, in a good way. He preferred late nights and midnight snacks the same way Logan preferred early sunrises and bitter coffee. Maybe it made sense, considering Logan’s teaching career. He needed to be up early anyways.

The kindergarteners Logan was currently teaching required a lot of energy. And while his sleep schedule was nothing short of exact, he always needed some sort of caffeine to make sure he didn’t drift off during class.

His eyes landed on his computer the minute he had his coffee mug in hand. Even though he spent his work days surrounded by kids, it wasn’t the same as parenting. He and Virgil had been discussing it since they got married, but it seemed that they would never have the right timing. Their careers were barely getting started, and there was no way they could ignore their stack of student loans that threatened to swallow them in debt. Still…

Logan had time. According to the clock on the oven, it was only seven. He didn’t need to be at the elementary school until eight-thirty. Maybe if he just looked into it, did his research, they could adopt.

Maybe.

~~~

“What’s this?” Virgil asked that evening, rifling through a stack of brochures Logan had left on the table. “Foster-to-adopt… Logan?” He glanced over at his husband, who was trying to feign innocence. “Do you want to tell me what’s with these flyers?”

“I just thought we could look into it.” He tried to be as nonchalant as he could, eyes flickering back and forth between Virgil and his laptop. “Nothing set in stone.”

“Lo, we’re not even financially stable enough to buy a second car, much less adopt. A kid is a life-long investment, and we both know how harsh the system is for those kids.” For a brief while in university, Virgil had debated on becoming a social worker. But that kind of work was rough on all sides, and the results were heavily varied. “And even if we fostered, they could easily take the kid away from us at any point, given the parents are still alive. Would you want to deal with that kind of heartbreak?”

“I thought you wanted kids too.” Logan frowned, not wanting to acknowledge Virgil’s points.

“I do, but I don’t know… I don’t want you to get your heartbroken if it doesn’t work out.”

“We’ll be helping them. You’re a lawyer because you want to help everyone and because you hated the idea of working in a hospital. Why not help these kids?”

Virgil looked at Logan. “The point of foster care is to be temporary guardians while their birth parents fix whatever issues they have. It’s selfless and sometimes, you get nothing in return. Are you sure about this?”

“Yes.” The two stared at each other for a minute, silently waiting for the other to back down. When it was clear that wasn’t the case, Virgil sighed and rubbed his eyes.

“You’re doing all the research.” He mumbled, kissing Logan on the cheek before walking off to start dinner. “And scheduling the classes.”

“Mhm.”

Once Virgil was convinced, Logan made quick work to find the right organizations. He contacted the state’s adoption resource exchange organization and was guided to parenting classes. Any waking hour not spent teaching was spent studying for the classes and making sure the house was fit for kids.

The house the couple currently lived in was larger than most would expect from recent grad students, with six bedrooms and two studies. This had been the house Virgil had grown up in, and recently inherited. While he was generally estranged from his parents towards the ends of their lives, neither of them wanted to sell the house. Virgil, to his credit, couldn’t let go of the property either. Logan hadn’t bothered to press, but he knew that despite the bad relationship between Virgil and his parents, this was all he had left of them.

All in all, space wasn’t a problem.

The problem with what Virgil liked to refer to as “the McMansion” was that a lot of the rooms had been unused for years. Dust covered practically any space that Virgil and Logan didn’t use on a daily basis. When Logan was alone, he could practically feel the emptiness around him.

It took a month to fix up the other rooms. All of them were livable spaces, just dusty and old. Virgil took the liberty of throwing out things, always rolling his eyes at the space. “It was just the three of us, I don’t understand why they didn’t get a smaller house. Our neighbors must think we’re an old rich couple about to kick the bucket.” He grumbled one day, making Logan chuckle.

“Regardless, it’s a nice space to grow up in. It’ll be nice to have children running around.”

“Children? Plural?” Virgil nearly sputtered, and Logan laughed again. “I don’t care what you think, we’re starting with one. God, can you imagine the young het-couples who have to deal with three babies all at once?”

“Triplets.” Logan clarified, trying to hide another laugh. “They manage.”

“No wonder the world’s a mess.”

This time, Logan didn’t bother hiding his laughter.

~~~

The day they got Thomas, it was raining. Virgil was fretting over the details last minute as they waited for Adri, their social worker, to come by with Thomas.

“He’s, like, three? Right? What do three year olds like? Video games? TV?” Virgil paced back and forth in the living room. Logan, who had had enough of Virgil’s panicking, stood in front of his husband, clasping Virgil’s shaking hands in his.

“The toys are all in his room, and we agreed he’s not getting anywhere near a screen until he’s five.” Logan reminded Virgil calmly. “I’m making dinner today, and tomorrow isn’t a school day, so we don’t need to worry about transportation yet. But the car seat is already strapped in the car and I double-checked to make sure it’s secure.”

“But what if he has allergies or doesn’t like us or-”

Logan looked at his husband with a smile. “We’ve made it this far. We can’t give up now.” Before he could say anything else, the doorbell rang.

Logan was the first to reach the door, leaving a nervous Virgil behind him as he opened it. “Hi, Adri.”

Thomas seemed small for his age, but he definitely checked off the boxes in everything Logan and Virgil had wanted in a kid. His big, brown eyes stared up at Logan.

The teacher bent down to Thomas’s height with a smile. “Hi, Thomas. I’m Logan. You can call me Dad, if you want.”

Thomas shuffled behind Adri, although his eyes still peeked out at Logan. The older man stood back up. “Why don’t you come in?” He offered, stepping out of the way so the two could walk inside.

“Hi!” Virgil was a bundle of nerves, trying to avoid sweaty hands and hyperventilating. “Can we get either of you anything to eat or drink? We have orange juice and water and coffee and milk and we can probably make chocolate milk-”

“That’s alright.” Adri said, shooting him a warm smile. “I was hoping one of you could play with Thomas while we discuss some final notes?”

“I’ll do it. I think legal matters are more of Virgil’s thing anyways.” Logan said. “Thomas, do you want to see your new room?” The little boy nodded eagerly, carefully walking to Logan.

“Now I want you to remember that we’re trying to make this permanent, but the process could take up to thirty months.” Adri reminded Virgil. “You guys are looking good so far, and I don’t doubt you’ll be good parents. I brought a list of things that the agency has you follow, but truthfully, I think you’ll be okay.”

Virgil nodded, trying to ignore the lump in his throat. This was really happening. They had a child in their care now.

Upstairs, Logan sat on the floor of Thomas’s room as the boy explored. He quickly figured out what his favorite stuffed animal was (a stuffed brown dog) and towed it around in a cradle-hold as he looked at the other toys. Unlike most kids, Thomas seemed to brush off all of the toys until he got to the dress-up chest. He opened it as if he was opening a treasure chest.

“Careful with the top, buddy.” Logan said, his kindergarten teacher coming out as he crawled across the room and held the top of the chest up so Thomas could look through the clothes.

Thomas pulled out a fireman’s jacket and hat. Carefully, he set them on the ground and put the jacket on. The sleeves covered his hands but it didn’t matter. Logan closed the chest and put the hat on Thomas’s head.

“Are we firefighters today?” Logan asked, and Thomas grinned.

“Fighting fire!” He pumped his fist in the air, and Logan smiled.

“I don’t think there are any fires here, but why don’t we go look at the other rooms and check?” Logan led Thomas out of the room. They proceeded to check every room, closet, and window in the house, and by the time they made it to the kitchen, Adri and Virgil were finished talking.

“Do you want to stay here, Thomas?” Adri asked, kneeling down to the little boy’s height. The three adults smiled as he nodded with a shy smile.

“They’re going to take care of you, okay? That means you have to be good for them, too. Got it, firefighter Thomas?” They raised the rim of the plastic hat, only for him to nod again and have it fall back down.

“I’ll visit in one week for an inspection, but everything seems okay at the moment. Call me if you have any questions.” Adri said as they walked them to the door. “Alright, see you soon!” She waved as Virgil shut the door.

“Hey, Thomas. I’m Virgil, but you can call me Dad.” The boy looked up at the two men, confused.

“But I thought he was Dad.” Thomas pointed at Logan.

“You can call us Virgil and Logan, or you can call me Papa and you can call Virgil Dad.” Logan said with a smile. “Whatever you want is okay with us. We’re gonna eat dinner and then it’s bath and bedtime, alright? Can we pick you up?”

“Yeah. Why do you have to ask that?”

Virgil picked him up. “Well, you see, there’s something very important called consent…”

~~~

Sunday flew by and Monday arrived, with Thomas’s first day of preschool bright and early. Thomas happily ate a breakfast of cereal in his firefighter’s jacket while this time, it was Logan panicking.

“Logan, you work next to his preschool.” Virgil reminded his husband, sipping watered down, sugary coffee as he watched Logan zoom around the kitchen. “And anyways, he doesn’t need to bring anything to preschool besides a lunch and a toy. We’ll drop him off together before your school starts.”

Virgil was the one to help Thomas into his shoes as Logan packed everyone’s lunches. He made sure to write a note for each before grabbing his bag and Virgil’s briefcase.

“Are you excited for your first day of school, buddy?” Virgil asked as he attached the velcro that adorned Thomas’s shoes together. “You get to go to preschool and make friends.”

“But what about you and Papa?” Thomas asked, and Virgil felt his heart melt at the words.

“Papa and I have work to go to. Kids go to school and adults go to work.” Virgil explained simply. “You’re all set. Are you sure you want to bring the firefighter jacket with you?”

Thomas nodded eagerly and Virgil chuckled.

“L, we gotta go!” He called out, scooping Thomas up in his arms. “Don’t want Thomas to be late for his first day of school!”

“Have you seen my lesson plans?”

“Sweetheart, they’re in your bag already. We’ll wait in the car!” Virgil yelled back, walking out to Logan’s SUV with Thomas. Logan had insisted they would need a big car, but now Virgil understood why. A big car and a big house meant more room for kids. Internally, he smacked himself on the forehead.

“Why is Papa running around?” Thomas asked as Virgil adjusted him on his hip for better access to the car keys. He unlocked the doors and opened one in the back so he could put the little boy in his car seat.

“Papa’s nervous about your first day of school.” Virgil replied, putting Thomas into the car seat and fumbling a little with the straps and seat belt.

“But why?”

“Well, he doesn’t want to leave you alone, but he’s only right next door to your school. And in a few years, he’ll be in the next classroom from you.” Virgil explained simply, finally buckling everything together and relaxing his shoulders. “He’s worried because he loves you.”

“Why aren’t you worried?” Virgil chuckled at the question.

“Because I love you just as much, and I think you’re a brave little firefighter who’s going to make a lot of friends.” Virgil smiled.

Ten minutes later, they arrived at the preschool. Virgil pulled into the parking lot and parked faster and more accurately than Logan had ever seen Virgil do. Virgil was the one who unbuckled Thomas’s seatbelt and helped him to the ground.

Logan grabbed his backpack and lunch and followed the two, watching as Virgil leaned one of his arms down so that Thomas could take Virgil’s hand in his.

Once they reached the main classroom, Logan caught up to them. The teacher, one of Logan’s coworkers, smiled warmly at them.

“Hi, Val.” He said awkwardly, but her attention was already on Thomas.

“You must be Thomas.” She said, kneeling down. “We’re gonna have a fun day today. But first, do you want to say goodbye to your dads?”

“Do I have to say goodbye forever?” Thomas asked, eyes wide and ready to overflow.

“No, they’ll be here to pick you up in a little while when they finish their work.” Valerie assured him, then looked at Logan pointedly. “In fact, I’m sure you’ll see your Papa a lot when you’re on the playground.”

“Okay. Goodbye, Dad and Papa.” The two husbands knelt down to give their goodbye hugs and kisses before Thomas walked into the classroom.

Valerie placed a hand on Logan’s shoulder. “Hey, I know it’s hard for parents to let go when their kid starts school, but-”

“Stay out of the way.” Logan finished in a huff. He witnessed it at the beginning of every school year with the kindergartners. Some kicked and screamed; most of the time, the ones doing so were the mothers.

“He’ll be okay. I’ll look out for him.” Valerie dropped her hand to her side and gave them both a comforting smile. “I’ll see you guys at three for pick up.” She promised.

Logan took one last look over his shoulder to see Thomas excitedly talking to a pair of boys in the classroom.

He’d be alright.

~~~

Taglist:

@plinamiismyotp @elementalshadowwitch @idkanameatall @zaisling @sunshineandspecs @bucketsofclams

[aquilaamber]

ACTIVISM & PROTEST!!!

Activism can be defined as “the use of direct and noticeable action to achieve result, usually political or social one”, whereas protest can be defined as “a strong complaint expressing disagreement, disapproval, or opposition” (Cambridge Dictionary 2019).

 THE USE OF SOCIAL MEDIA IN ACTIVISM & PROTEST IN FUTURE BY ACTIVISTS

Platforms of social media like Facebook, Twitter, YouTube etc have increasingly being used for social movements by activist groups as they consider it to be collectively crowdsource for various participants. Big corporations normally support social media as the technology helps in the development of the sense of “digital village’ (Murthy 2018, p. 1). The use of social media acted an important role in communication of information, raising awareness, and creating call for action throughout countries. ‘Hashtag activism’ is usually to introduce discussions of latest topics to people who are not informed. In the experience of President Trump’s administration, the side-lined groups are often being directed and ignored of their rights. As social media as the activists’ tool, a single Facebook group started the Women’s March social movement all over the countries. Then, in Twitter, students and survivors of the mass shooting of the Parkland Shooting prepared and form the #NeverAgain movement after the tragic incident and still there is no change of gun laws in the country. Although the increase in social movement has the knack in making big impacts, it also increases the government agencies authority to spy on them, where there is no privacy, which has been an issue (Gonzales 2018).

THE FAKE NEWS & PROPAGANDA FACTOR INTO THE USE OF SOCIAL MEDIA FOR ACTIVISTS AND PROTESTER

Social media has been used as a platform to share ideas and information, especially among journalists and academics. In these recent years however, malevolent users have the same benefit as they have the same opportunity to share fake news and propaganda for their own agenda. Now, “Twitter has emerged as the internet application most preferred by terrorists, even more popular than self-designed websites or Facebook” (Prier 2017, p. 54). The filter bubble of the social media landscape is the outcome of algorithmic selection, age-old, and subconscious cognitive biases. That then, when added with particularly deliberate misinformation, inadvertently big brands funds through ads and supposedly spread, which is a part of intensive propaganda efforts, in the end people get fake news. Google apparently has banned publishers who has misleading contents and many more actions in battling fake news from being spread (Mitchell 2017).

GRAFFITI/STREET ART OR ART BECOME SYMBOLS OF A PROTEST

Graffiti and street art can be a medium to voice out social change, protest, or expressing the community’s desires, but it could also be provocative. Although many cities linked graffiti as degenerate, where the society is out of control, there are some cities, where it is legal, within boundaries and appreciated as a form of social expression. These forms of arts are as social expression is extensive and is in many shapes, where it has tag of identity, indecipherable expressions of protest and politics, complicated and beautiful scenes despite the wild locations sometimes (Maddox 2016).

  I have never personally participated in activism and protest in the streets, but I do engage myself with digital activism. Yes, I have clicked ‘Like’ on Facebook to participate in the digital activism and support their cause. I also have signed petitions to protest, which mostly is regarding animals and environment issues. By engaging myself with digital activism, I hope I could contribute at least a little to the cause.

  REFERENCES:

Cambridge Dictionary 2019, Activism, viewed 13 October 2019 <https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/protest>.

Murthy, D 2018, ‘Introduction to Social Media, Activism, and Organizations’, Sage Journals, pp. 1-4.

Gonzales, C 2018, The Future of Social Media Activism, Medium, viewed 13 October 2019 <https://medium.com/@wordsbyacloud/the-future-of-social-media-activism-35e57ae8232b>.

Prier, J 2017, ‘Commanding the Trend: Social Media as Information Warfare’, Strategic Studies Quarterly, Vol. 11, No. 4, pp. 50-85.

Mitchell, S 2017, Tools for protest & activism, networks of lies: Social media and the ‘fake news’ epidemic, Carlton University <https://carleton.ca/align/2017/tools-for-protest-activism-networks-of-lies-social-media-the-fake-news-epidemic/>.

Maddox, D 2016, Graffiti and street art can be controversial, but can also be a medium for voices of social change, protest, or expressions of community desire. What, how, and where are examples of graffiti as a positive force in communities?, The Nature of Cities, viewed 13 October 2019 <https://www.thenatureofcities.com/2016/03/23/graffiti-and-street-art-can-be-controversial-but-can-also-be-a-medium-for-voices-of-social-change-protest-or-expressions-of-community-desire-what-how-and-where-are-examples-of-graffiti-as-a-posi/>.

[boogiewrites]

Choking On Sapphires 59

Title & Song: Under My Thumb

Characters: Alfie Solomons x Genevieve (OFC)

Word Count:  4100+

Summary: Genevieve and Alfie find their busy lives becoming too congested with the wants and opinions of others without as much time for themselves. After her father's thinly veiled threats come to both her and Alfie, they are forced to face how others are molding their relationship. Genevieve makes a suggestion to ease the problem.

Warnings/Tags: Language. Her dad being an ass. Derogatory, sexist language. Antisemitism.Canon-typical language.Insinuation of non-con sex. Ends with fluff.

**Chapter song is Under My Thumb by Rolling Stones.*

Click on my icon then go to Mobile Masterlist in my bio for my other works and chapters. (Had to do this since Tumblr killed links, sorry.)

Another day waking up alone, which wasn't as sad as it had been before you'd gotten together with Alfie. You both had your lives separate from each other, your work of legal and illegal means that kept you busy. Without cohabitating, there was no crawling into bed together after having coming home for the evening or waking up together after passing out from a long day before only to wear yourselves out again the next morning. Once again, Shabbat became your great respite together. You tried to spend as much of Friday evenings into Sunday together as possible. It didn't always work out that way but neither of you wasted too much time crying over it. That's just how the unpredictable lives of two working people were sometimes. And despite you both giving the public face of being solid and strong in your faith and heritage, the darker sides of your lives intervened at times, despite the best of attempts made for it not to.

You've worn the soles of your heels down this week. As it always came in the last and first week of any month. Business picked up and became more hectic. You collected rent and tended to your tenants wants and needs. You delivered by hand your charitable donations and ran the meals for the children at the children's home. You still had your art classes to teach and girls families to meet that applied for scholarships. This all culminated in these two weeks it seemed, money always needs to be estimated by this time each month by your analysts. You were tired, your feet ached and you'd been resting them by the fire in your office as you finalized your ledger to send off to the accountants for Abeille's earnings for the month. There were no worries as far as money was concerned but they weren't to be the source of your frustrations as fate would have it.

Alfie was working, which was understandable. As he did when he couldn't meet you on Friday's he'd sent one of his boys over with sweets and flowers and a clumsy, rushed written note of apology for his absence. You'd take to giving the delivery boy, a sweet young man with pristine manners, a kiss to the cheek and telling him to give the same to Alfie. Upon the first delivery of this from you to him, there was uproarious laughter after Alfie demanded in front of other workers that the boy gives him what you sent him back with. This would soon be simply delivered as "The lady sends her usual regards." which seemed to fit everyone much better on their end.

On this late evening, Claire brings in the last of the mail with a heavy sigh, tossing a single thin envelope in front of you. She plopped down in front of your desk with a sour face.

"I shall soon go live with the Shelby gypsy's with how I seem to know what's going to happen all the time." she rolls her eyes. "From your father." she says in an annoyed tone, her hand pointing towards the sealed envelope.

"If I haven't joined them yet, neither should you." you huff out a laugh, swiping your letter opener through the paper. "Wait until my foresight causes me to lose my mind and then we shall go together, hmm?" you suggest. You unfold the paper and read it with am indifferent expression. Claire waits patiently as she always does.

"I have received word of your coupling with not only a known criminal but a Jew of great importance in his community. If it were not insulting enough that you choose to identify as such against my wishes and warnings, you now are openly associating with his sort.  I have heard as well of you acting entirely inappropriately by showing affection publicly to him. I have overlooked your solitary lifestyle, I have overlooked your poor decision making to appear as one of their belief, as you were to remain alone and not have the chance of reproducing with such people, with that I was able to turn a cheek. I can no longer do so and insist you end this regretful affair with this Alfred Solomons of Camden immediately. If you do not heed this most generous and polite warning, I will take further action. I will not have my gene pool sullied in such a way to have your offspring as branches from the Greene family tree. We are a pure and Godly lot who will not be tainted by your choices. I will be sending word to this Solomons myself of your questionable past and telling him of the things you've done to reach such a point in your life and I can only pray to my God that despite being what he is, he will see you for what you really are."

You take a deep and slow breath and Claire remains calm. You move only your eyes up to her and ask for a moment alone. She nods and stands on the other side of your office door. As she clicks the door behind her, a series of loud crashes follow. She frowns and stands defeated and waits. She hears you curse and scream and throw things and she knows it's justified, she only wishes this ridiculous behavior of your fathers would end. She wonders if she had enough money to hire someone to kill him. Probably not but she could enjoy the fantasy in her head.

"Come back in, please. Mind the glass."  you say in a calmer tone as she comes to see a tossed room before her. Vases smashed, books scattered and the iron poker from the fire in your hand as she sees the damage you'd inflicted to the armchair beside you. Stuffing settled slowly in the air around you as she gently shuts the door behind her. "Would you be so kind as to sit at my desk and take my response dear?" you say while trying to catch your breath.

"Certainly." she says sweetly, paper and instrument in hand.

"George..." you begin, tossing the iron rod in the direction of the fire with a loud metallic thunk.  "No." you state with a firm nod.

Claire looks up at you, eyes blinking and waiting for further instruction. "That all?"

"That's all." you said pinching the bridge of your nose. "You can read the letter if you wish. Although it will do nothing but infuriate you." you roll your eyes and move to sit in the untouched armchair. "What a cunt. What a pompous, self-righteous bastard. Why must he live?" you lament towards the ceiling as Claire reads the letter. She promptly makes a noise of disgust and tosses it into the fire.

"I'll send your reply." she states. "I'm not even sure what he's referring to about that "who you really are" nonsense."

"Some trauma we've both suppressed that he will no doubt twist to make my fault?" you shrug and mutter.

"Entirely possible." she softly agrees. "Should I fetch the phone so you can tell Alfie?" she asks.

"No, no, don't bother him with this nonsense. It's beneath us both." you wave your hand dismissively. "Just get some girls in here to clean this up. The accounts are finished, send them to the offices and I'm going to go to fucking bed." -------- You take a few drops of your nighttime vial and sleep deep, no dreams to forewarn you of anything your father would do.

You wake to weight shifting your bed. You groan and look to the source to find Alfie looking down at you. "What the fuck is this bollocks?" he says holding a piece of paper.

"Good morning to you as well." you purse your lips. "So nice to see you Genevieve, how have you been love, I've missed you." you mumble sarcastically, moving to sit yourself up.

"Yeah, yeah mornin'." he gruffs out and puts the paper in your lap. "Who the fuck does he think he is?"

"Well let me read it first, Fie." you say softly, getting your glasses off the bedside table.

"It has come to my attention that you have been courting Genevieve Greene. I would insist that this desist at once. I would like to state I am sending you this for reasons beyond the selfish as I do not want her to become persuaded to join your whispered lifestyle or to become one of your people. But I believe her to be acting out in a rebellious state as she's always been a difficult girl. She has also always been a troubled girl, and known for her deception and lies towards men. I would assume that her nature hasn't changed, as those who seem to be weak to spells of hysteria and madness never seem to outgrow it past a certain age. As we know Genevieve is far past the age for such childish antics she likes to play. I'm sure she seems lovely but I would have you know she has tried to ruin numerous relationships of mine by falsely accusing men of such unspeakable things that my calling them such should let you know of their disgusting nature. She is a thief and a liar and those traits might be something viewed as good to someone like you, however, I feel I should warn you nonetheless of her lack of loyalty and her history of being, as much as I would hate to say it about my own, a strumpet. Certainly, a man who has such a position in his community would not want to be associated with such a creature as she. Any decent man I have tried to give her to has been met with violence and vicious rumors spread about them by her after he defiant refusal of them. She may seem tame but I assure you she is hardly above an animal when she finds herself bored and displeased. When she feels she has been wronged her behavior only worsens. I hope you heed my warning and if you do not, I will be in touch again."

You sigh and let your shoulders slump. "Much what I expected."

"I'll ask again... who the fuck does he think he is?"

"Christ himself it seems." you roll your eyes. "I received a letter from him last night threatening me as well. His words to me of you were clearly spat from the same tongue."

"What's he on about? Accusin' men?" his brow is low and you know it set that way not because of you, his tone was sharp and you tried not to take it personally.

"You're a smart man, Alfie what do you think it means?" you retort obviously.

"They... Jesus Christ Genevieve, what did he do to you?"

"I don't..." you sigh and look at him with tired eyes. "I don't want to reminisce about it," you say sharply. "I try to forget it all." you look away from him and rub your face. "It's nothing that hasn't happened to almost every other woman since time began." you roll your eyes and shrug, reaching to take his cold hand between yours. "I haven't seen you all week." you murmur in a softer voice. "The last thing I want is to wake up to you angry and to talk about what horrid things men have done to me over the years." you angrily pout. "Ignore him. He's ridiculous. Truly. I thought my mother's side was who I got my dramatics from clearly it must be the Greene's." you look away and your shoulders slump.

"Fuckin' 'ell." he groans, his other hand rubbing down his face as he takes off his hat. Seeing the sadness in your face.  "I..." he closes his eyes and shakes his head. "I shouldn't have come in here like 'is, love." his voice and face soften. He rises and kisses your forehead. "Like a bloody bull, I barged in here. All red 'n angry." he scolds himself, taking off his clothes to a shirt and pants. "Hard to think with softness in mind when I'm angry and want answers, Genny. So used to dealin' with men. No room for subtlety or tenderness with the lot of 'em." he says in a self-deprecating way. "Let me in 'ere with you if you'll have me." he says, motioning to the bed.

You scoot and raise the covers, he settles back against your piles of pillows and pulls you against him. "I threw vases and destroyed an armchair with an iron poker after I read my letter." you admit with a  deadpan delivery that is met with a loud laugh.

He leans and kisses the top of your head. "'At's my girl." he praises.

"He's insulted both of us and I know you won't take any threat, no matter how vague but antagonizing him won't do either of us any good." You snuggle up to his side and slip your fingers between the buttons of his shirt. "I'm not jeopardizing your hard work for something stupid my fool, estranged father might do. I'm not going to risk my hard earned life either. He's not worth it. No matter how much he infuriates us." you shake your head and look up at him.

"I'm not gonna let him insult you like 'at." he says with a deep and certain tone that makes a small smile appear on your face.

"Simply dismiss him as I've done. He's not a rival gang, he's not even a businessman. There's nothing to be won or lost here of reputation or finance." you shake your head.

He reaches up and pulls the covers over your shoulder. "No threats of violence then, yeah? Just gonna make sure he knows he can't talk about you like 'at, love. What an abhorrent and repugnant thing he is. Speakin' of you like that, estranged or not, his blood." he shakes his head and rests his hand on your cheek. "You shouldn't have had to deal with such abuse from the likes of him."

"I know." you look away from him and he moves your face back to his.

"I mean it. No one's ever gonna treat you in such a way as long as I'm around, eh? They'll pay with their hide if they dare to, love.  Not even a bad word is gonna slip past anyone's lips when it comes to you. I'll be sure they know not to dare speak ill of ya."

"Shouldn't worry yourself over it too much. I'm a woman, people will talk. It's what they do. We have more important things to worry about it." you give him a sweet smile he's thankful to see after his regrettable approach to how he entered your home and the conversation.

"Still," he states with a nod of his head towards you. "No one's gonna treat my woman in such a way. You won't be the only one standing up for yourself now, right? Best you remember that, love. You don't gotta fight all your battles alone anymore." he leans in and presses his lips to yours for a moment.

"I'm afraid to inform you that I'm still disrespected daily. It's a losing battle." you say with a lazy smirk. "Although the sentiment is wonderful, darling."

"Who the fuck is givin' you grief? Not none of my men is it?" he frowns.

"No, you've scared them plenty, they're all polite." you chuckle. "Take any man on the street in London and have him interact with me for a moments time he'll say or do something insulting. Just their nature." you roll your eyes. "No offense to you, your mum did some fine work with raising you." you pat his stomach, softer from the winter weight and how you preferred him. "Except when you're angry." your tease. "I thought your etiquette with waking me up this morning was lacking." you grin.

"It was." he nods. "'Spose it's all gettin' to me as well. Not gettin' to see you, the end of the month headaches of retrieving owed money from unwilling hands, workin' up new contracts and negotiatin' as the old ones expire."

"I've felt it too this past week in particular. And not seeing you doesn't help." you give in and let yourself pout, your fingers playing in his beard as you watch him with tired eyes.

"It does not at all, pet." he says with a subtle smile down at you.

"I'd like to curl up with you for a week and tell everyone else to bugger off." you complain in a deep whining voice. "Tell London to shove it up its arse and take care of itself for once." you sigh as you lay your arm across him.

"Sorry I couldn't make it last night." he says, feeling guilty he's added to your distress. A man should be gentle with his love and you being as hard and powerful as him, it was easy to forget you deserved special treatment sometimes.

"It's fine. I'm just emotionally drained. Hard two weeks with work and then a severe lack of you... and then George... the horse's arse."

"You can have me 'til tonight." he offers.

You groan and bury your face in his shirt as he rubs your back. "I don't feel greedy for wanting more." you grumble.

"I know, love, I know." you feel the rise and fall of his chest as he sighs with the same sentiment.

You knew that not living together, but being together would create its own problems. But you hadn't realized to what extent you would be suffering for living so far from the city and thus so far from Alfie. There just wasn't a substitute for living together in terms of spending time together. You missed that love bubble. You missed seeing him off to work in the morning and undressing him at night, stroking his hair as he laid on you like a pup when he felt particularly down. You wanted him all to yourself. You wanted to do something besides complain about work with him. And with that, you were both reminded of the concern for oversharing or where the line was drawn with telling each other about what you were up to. The trust was there and with being together, but not married made sharing your underground career's with each other more difficult. In theory, what's his was yours and what was yours was his but it wasn't truly and every time you held back from sharing something with him it felt wrong. But it also didn't seem right to fully divulge everything to him either. Living together would help, being married would help, but how would you even find time for such a thing if you couldn't even simply spend time together as is.

You needed a break from all the worry and trade. A clear separation of work and play that let you both breathe, feel like two humans in love again. With the passing thought, you chew the inside of your cheek. There hadn't even been time to find the right setting to tell each other that either. It wasn't as if either of you had some grand romantic notion that had to accompany it. However, a night out without being hassled, having him taken away to interrupt the flow of sweet words that could've led to such a thing being said would certainly be helpful. You needed to be alone. To not be who you were for only a moment.

"Alfie?" you lilt out, fingers rubbing against his own.

"Yes, love?" he says as you both doze lazily.

"Do you think going on holiday might help?"

"I think I don't have the time. And I'd be left waitin' on you while you's workin' and that'd make me restless and I'd rather be at work."

"I mean together."

"Oh, like a proper one, eh?" his face shifts in thought.

"Yes. Out of London. Away from work for just a bit. Get out of the heavy air and haze." you move to look up at him.

"Sounds good in theory." you can sense the hesitation in his voice.

"You don't want to?"

"I would love to, but... work." he states with pursed lips.

"If you plan ahead can't you manage it? You have seconds for a reason, you know. You're the boss you should get to do what you want when you want."

"It would be lovely if that's what bein' a boss meant." he chuckles.

"I'm serious. You have Ollie and the other men don't you? Can they handle the shop for a few days? We won't tell anyone we're gone, we'll just plan for it. There are phones if anything really goes wrong. We don't have to hop off to the other side of the world or anything."

By the way he's looking at you, you can tell he's sensing this was more a command and less a request at this point. "And where is it you'd like to go?"

You consider it a moment. A place that would be reachable, far but not too far. Somewhere that would make you happy, where you could have fun, get lost and enjoy each other. "Paris."

"Paris, eh?" he nods, eyes glancing around the room.

"Yes. Paris. There's so much to do there. We can eat and drink and go see the art and shows. I have my apartment there, I only have to call in some help and we'd have our own private place to stay. A driver, a cook, a maid, we wouldn't have to worry about a thing."

"Except work back home." he gruffs out.

"C'mon, Alfie." you whine. "There are phones, there are men you've been grooming to help you for years." you retort.  He sighs and looks down at you with a raised brow. "I want to have you all to myself." you whisper. "I want you and me... uninterrupted... alone... no work... no horrid people and their opinions... only us."

"I want that too, love. I really do." he nods and brings your hand up to his lips to kiss your knuckles.

"Then let's make a plan. Find a time in your diary that you could afford to leave blank. Take your girl on holiday and spoil her." you give him a mischievous smile.

"If it's shoppin' you want we can go to London and I'll just let you loose with my money, eh?" he jokes.

"It's YOU I want, Alfie." you say more seriously. "Our relationship has become so congested with others and their opinions, their wants and demands of us that we've not had time to properly be Fie and Genny like we used to. I miss it."

"My little Genny missin' her man, eh?" he sighs.

"She is. I miss mon Fie. I miss sleeping naked all day. Not having to keep covered because either could be seen or called upon at any moment. I miss going to sleep and waking up with you for days on end, losing ourselves in one another. I miss getting to simply enjoy our time together instead of having to be preoccupied with what we have to do as soon as we are forced apart again. And always prematurely." you pout.

"Don't think I don't miss the same things, sweetheart. I try to find the time, I really do."

"I know, and I accept that that's how our lives are but because our lives aren't going to just drop the time we want of each other in our laps, we have to set the time ourselves.  Since we are so busy, we must schedule time to not be busy."

"'Spose you're right there, eh?" he says with an exaggerated expression before it shifts to his deep thinking one. "And my little bird wants Paris?" he says after a pause.

"She does." you smile softly at him.

"How's 'bout you have me right now and then we'll go plan for Paris, yeah?" he suggests, brushing his nose against yours.

"How about a nap, then I have you, then we eat then we plan for Paris?" you say with a laugh that he returns.

"That is where we are at in life now innit?" he chuckles.

"I know you didn't get enough sleep last night."

"I did not." he admits with a shake of his head.

"So let's sleep first. It'll only improve the quality of anything thereafter."

"You are always correct my brilliant little bird." he says with a  kiss as he moves down the bed.

"I missed hearing that as well."

"Then let me wrap around you and I'll whisper it to you until we fall asleep." he says with that warm velvety tone that makes you hum in adoration.

"Please, do." you say enthusiastically, cuddling up back to chest with him, his head tilted to speak sweet words into your ear. Even though it was hardly minutes before you both fell asleep, the promise of Paris and his whispered affections were more than enough to leave you with sweet dreams.

@fangirlfreakingout @jaegeeeeer @cosettewinchester @lookuptheskyisfalling-blog @brianaisasongbird @cry5t4l-w4rri0r @iliveonchocolateandnetflix @jess2464 @hardygal69 @thegarrisonpublichouse @a-flock-of-angry-pigeons @pootle @negansdirtygirl22 @musingsby-night @wtf-is-wrong-with-this @shine-dont-shadow @inkinterrupted @vale0413 @lafayettes-baguettes-1 @sxlomons @aphnxrising @emerald-bijou @elaenom @give-jack-a-lightsaber @anrm1 @ultrablackwidower @tinastarkandco

[mind-reader1]

Queen of Hearts (Ch. 14)

Drake x MC (Emma Barnes)

TRR AU: What would happen if Emma loved Drake but had to marry Liam?

Catch up here

Warnings: None, some angst 

Note: Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list! Sorry this chapter is so short, I promise there’s good stuff coming! 

Word Count: 1504

Summary: Kiara throws herself at Drake over some wine, but will Emma be able to keep her cool? Drake and Emma have a heart to heart and get caught in the moment, getting busted yet again. Is their secret still safe? 

Chapter 14: Wildest Dreams - Taylor Swift 

Say you'll remember me Standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset babe Red lips and rosy cheeks Say you'll see me again even if it's just in your wildest dreams (ah ah) (ah ah) Wildest dreams (ah ah)

You see me in hindsight Tangled up with you all night Burn it down Some day when you leave me I bet these memories follow you around You see me in hindsight Tangled up with you all night Burnin' it down (burnin' it down) Some day when you leave me I bet these memories follow you around (follow you around)

Say you'll remember me Standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset babe Red lips and rosy cheeks Say you'll see me again even if it's just pretend

Once inside they were greeted by some familiar and some new faces. It didn't take Emma long to discover what would help her gain Kiara's family's support, Hakim wanted Cordonia nominated for a prestigious art festival and that was the reason for hosting the art festival showcasing Cordonia's artists. Hakim went around the room one by one and introduced himself to everyone, surprising them all with his intimate knowledge of who they were. As he got to Emma, she formally invited him to their wedding just as she had with every other noble family, and just like the others, he declined, they were expected at a legal summit in Switzerland. Another family to convince, nothing about this would be easy, Emma thought to herself. Hakim left, and everyone took a seat, Kiara sat too close for comfort to Drake on the couch and Emma carefully watched her as they talked. It didn't take much convincing to gain Kiara's support, as soon as they had it, Emma jumped up.

“How about that grand tour now?” Drake jumped up as well and tried to maneuver away from Kiara, he was trying to save her and himself from Emma.

“Zeke is the best at giving tours!” They followed Zeke out to beautiful patio that overlooked rows and rows of grape vines. A woman was overlooking the vineyard, focused on the canvas in front of her. After Joelle introduced herself, Zeke brought out various bottles of house wines and glasses for everyone to sample as the sun set. Emma sat next to Liam with Drake on her other side and Kiara on his other side. Drake swirled his wine around and looked at it, unsure while everyone else tasted the fruity chardonnay. Olivia smirked and noticed that Drake seemed uninterested.

“What do you think of the wine Drake?” He looked up caught off guard and stumbled over his words using the wrong verbage to describe it. Emma was going to rescue him, but Kiara beat her to it.

“Wine is not for everyone Drake. I'm sure you're a whiskey connoisseur.” Her hand rested gently on Drake's leg and lingered a little too long. Drake coughed and shifted in his chair noticing Emma's white knuckles on her chair next to him. Zeke relieved some of the tension by sharing a story of his own embarrassment in a political setting. Drake carefully rested his hand on Emma's knee under the table, giving it a soft squeeze, reassuring her that everything was okay. Zeke poured everyone another white that was made in the traditional sparkling form like champagne. Emma made a short toast, and everyone clinked their glasses, noticing a spark between Zeke and Penelope as they talked about their love for animals. Zeke brought out one more bottle for them to sample, a rich red wine. Liam and Emma settled on having the sparkling wine at their wedding. She leaned over to Drake conspiratorially.

“Don't  worry, there will be plenty of whiskey there too.” Drake chuckled. They finished their last sample and everyone wandered back in except for Drake who looked out over the vineyard.

“Hey.” Emma sidled up next to him and looked out over the vineyard too.

“Hey yourself. You doing okay?” He wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her closer.

“I'd be doing better if Kiara wasn't all over you.” Drake chuckled and kissed the top of her head.

“You've been awfully quiet tonight.”

“Is it a crime to silently enjoy some nice wine?” Emma raised an eyebrow at him.

“Since when do you prefer wine over whiskey Drake?” He sighed.

“Truth is Barnes, I'm trying to fit in but I'm over my head. All this courtly stuff, I've always dismissed it, but now, if I want to be with you it's going to become a part of my life. I never thought I'd end up here, not even in my wildest dreams.”

“Sipping wine and touring the duchies of Cordonia?”

“Or in love with the same woman as my best friend, who's a duchess. Or acting like a fool over the woman I love. Or caring about courtly events. Take your pick.”

“You're not a fool Drake Walker.”

“I figured out at a young age that I'd never be like them, like the nobles, I'd never be good enough. I thought that if I didn't care, it wouldn't matter. Now I care and I'm in love with a noble woman, I just want to be good enough, to be worthy of you. Even if it is in the shadows.”

“Drake it doesn't matter what everyone else thinks. What matters is you and me. You're stuck with me, for good now.” Emma pulled out the ring from under her dress and Drake grinned down at the sight of it.

“I'd like it a lot more if it was on your finger, but I'll take it Barnes.” Emma turned and wrapped her arms around Drake as he pulled her closer. Looking up at him she stood on her tiptoes and gave him a quick kiss. She caught Drake off guard, but he leaned down for another kiss, losing themselves in the moment. They pulled away at the sound of someone clearing their throat. Busted...again. 

They turned to find Hana standing there shyly.

“Sorry to interrupt... everyone's headed back towards the estate.” Drake and Emma followed Hana and joined the group. After everyone had wandered off, settling into their rooms or exploring, Emma found Penelope wandering around looking for her poodles. After searching the estate, they found them with Zeke who was tending to one of their paws. He confessed his dreams of being a vet, despite being the heir of his family's house. It had clearly taken a lot for him to admit that, but it was clear he trusted Penelope and Emma saw her opportunity, she convinced him that telling his family would be important and in return, he agreed to attend her wedding. Zeke walked Penelope to her room and Emma heard the sound of footsteps behind her, turning she found Liam.

“To what do I owe the pleasure? I'm not going to be read the riot act again for, yesterday am I?” Liam smiled dryly.

“I was actually coming to see if you'd like to sample some of the foods from tomorrow?” Emma looked at him suspiciously.

“No ulterior motives?”

“I would like to talk but I promise it will be civil.” Emma eyed him once more before shrugging.

“Let's do it.” Liam led her over to a small tray with various food samples on it.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” She asked between bites. Liam set his sample down and took a seat, Emma following him.

“I talked to Drake last night, after the spa.” Emma swallowed hard, she didn't think she liked where this was going.

“I want to apologize for my behavior again, I got quite upset with him about what happened. You have done an amazing job on this tour so far and successfully recruited everyone and rallied the people. That's not all though.” Emma was surprised to hear the praise from Liam, it was an uncommon occurrence these days.

“I'm worried about Drake. He told me about his nightmares. I gave him my therapists card, but I don't know that he'll call. We used to talk all the time, now,” Liam sighed, “now not so much. Just keep an eye on him for me, will you?” Emma squeezed Liam's hand.

“I know Liam. I'm worried too, but he's getting better. You know you can always talk to me too.” He squeezed her hand in return.

“Thank you, Emma, but it's just strange for me still.” Emma nodded in understanding.

“Oh, I wanted to tell you, I told Olivia, she shouldn't give us anymore trouble.”

“Thank you.” She stood and straightened her dress and began walking away.

“Would you like to finish the samples?” Emma gave him a small smile.

“No thank you Liam, but I've lost my appetite.” Emma was racked with guilt. She felt that Liam and Drake's friendship was falling apart because of her, and she hadn't stopped to even consider how much she and Drake hurt Liam every time he caught them together. She couldn't believe that her life had become so crazy. She couldn't blame herself though, none of this was her fault, no one was to blame. It was just a shitty situation. All Emma wanted was to curl up in Drake's arms, forget about it for a bit and make sure that Kiara wasn't trying to seduce him, she had been all over him. She checked the time and realized Drake should have been there by now, she pulled out her phone to text him and saw he had already texted her. Kiara had caught him in the hallways, he told her he got lost looking for the kitchen and went back to his room, he was stuck there for the night. Emma groaned and fell back onto her pillows.

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