#cackling thank you so much

[nochangeintheplan]

Commission for @passports-pls (2/2)

[meltedmush]

Thank you @thisintermezzo for commissioning me! 🫶💖💖💖💖

This was so funny and fun to work on, especially it’s the very first regular Bingqiu kiss I’ve drawn! 😂

[meanbossart]

You mentioned Drow having been raised by the drow & their interesting culture about sex. Due to Lolth/that culture being different from ours, does that mean he associates bottoming with social dominance?

Like not saying he doesn't get the surface attitude (if it exists, idk about Faerun's gender roles) is way different.

I've just honestly been thinking about this off and on for like a week now and had to ask. Your work gives the best brain worms. :)

First of all, getting this ask felt like I won something.

But ALAS, he does not. He left the Underdark quite young and before ever becoming sexually active, so, while he's aware of that particular outlook he does not abide by it - In fact, his resentment toward drow is so intense that he actively thinks the opposite out of spite.

But rather than it having anything to do with gender, to him bottoming is a submissive action in the same way that victim and perpetrator are clearly distinguishable in a stabbing based on who's holding the knife. (This is DU drow's brain right here, not mine, leave the police out of this).

And here's the thing - he wants to feel submissive in the bedroom, both because he enjoys it and in part due to his own sexual hangups. Violence, sex, and love are all overlapping concepts in his mind that he has a difficult time distinguishing from each other, and following the severing of ties with Bhaal those feelings do not go away.

One way he finds to deal with that is by lending the other party control, and bottoming just so happens to be a way he finds to do that; It's definitely more akin to a placebo effect, but hey, it works for him. Astarion also enjoys the arrangement so it's all well and good.

But to tie it back: as I'm pretty sure I've said before, he does sometimes play up the "Oh I'm a drow bottoming, so I guess I'm the woman" thing. He does it as a joke. He finds it funny. He tells you to get on with it because there's 15 other jaluks outside waiting for a turn. He grabs you by the back of the neck and demands you screw more kids into him so he can kill them at lolth's altar (cue laughter). He moans exaggeratedly and with a feminine cadence - but the biggest joke of all is that, by doing this, he's finding a way to be dominant in the bedroom in which he's comfortable with, and without it having anything with who is doing the stabbing.

Thank you for the ask, I hope you enjoy my fantasy 5D sex chess.

Anyway here's wonderwall

[canisalbus]

About that one ask where Machete murders everyone. I'm in my fire phase at the moment and thought blue would look good in contrast to Machete's usual red :)

.

[hacash]

terror shitposting (18/?)

[feroluce]

Made a FANTASTIC discovery today regarding the meaning behind Boothill's fourth eidolon, I'm so happy!!! Most of it is just cowboy references, like

Eidolon 1: Dusty Trail's Lone Star- cowboy lingo, the Lone Star of Texas

Eidolon 2: Milestonemonger- more cowboy lingo, someone who roams and wanders

Eidolon 3: Marble Orchard's Guard- yet more cowboy lingo, a term for a graveyard (a fave of mine, because for me it evokes the image of a Church Grim <333)

Eidolon 4: Cold Cuts Chef- ????

Google didn't really provide much on Eidolon 4 like for the first three. Before today I had assumed it was just another movie reference of some sort, since Boothill is like entirely based on/inspired by old Western films.

"Cold cuts" are basically lunch meat/deli meat. It's precooked meat that doesn't need any kind of preparation- you can literally just eat it cold. Since it didn't seem to be a movie reference, I thought oh, maybe it's a nod to his lifestyle? Boothill is unhoused and lives on the run from the IPC with little rest, he doesn't really have the means to cook. Precooked, easy food like that would be a godsend for someone in his circumstances.

Anyway the original Chinese text gives it an entirely different, MUCH wilder meaning fjadskljfkld

love how they chose "celebrity chef" to show his expertise and/or fame in this fjkdlsja

Because no, "cold cuts" isn't cowboy lingo for anything, but cold meat specifically is.

It's how you refer to a corpse.

"Cold Cuts Chef" is not a title talking about his cooking ability, or his life's circumstances, or anything as mundane as that, IT'S ABOUT THE FACT THAT BOOTHILL SPECIALIZES IN DEALING DEATH, THIS MAN IS EXTREMELY SKILLED, AND GOOD AT WHAT HE DOES, AND WHAT HE DOES IS MURDER!!!!!

[ariadne-mouse]

for the quick drawing prompts: the haunted folding chair duo ira wendagoth and moc weepe meet up

Morally questionable folding lawn chairs of the world, unite!

[thingsthatbleedfic]

I offer you all a humble meme in thanks for being allowed to view your amazing story

[beigetiger]

I would adore a post about how Skulduggery treated Valkyrie in phase 1, your stuff is so fun to read

HEHEHEHEH IVE BEEN ENABLED

There is so much stuff to unpack in phase 1 it’s kind of ridiculous, but I’m going to talk about literally whatever comes to mind because this would be SO fun to talk about.

The first thing that comes to my mind when I think of their super early dynamic is that Skulduggery really neglects Valkyrie’s physical needs as a living human. In book 2, Valkyrie mentions how she hardly ever gets the opportunity to eat or sleep because she spends so much time doing things, but brushes it off as just another sacrifice it takes to be with him. This was one of the first things I noticed while also reading this book. Skulduggery doesn’t need to eat or sleep, and Valkyrie doesn’t want him to leave her behind and so just…doesn’t tell him that she actually needs something, and he’s too caught up doing his own thing and viewing her as a fully responsible adult to note that she’s not getting the basic necessities for a teenager. He does eventually get better in this way of course, doing things like adjusting parts of his house so Valkyrie can eat and sleep without the back and forth of going home.

There is also, of course, the repeated endangerment. Phase 1 Valkyrie never holds it against him of course (even phase 2 Val barely mentions it), but he definitely has no problem bringing her into situations where she’s likely to be killed, including situations that are kind of unnecessary (like him telling her to drive a truck when she’s thirteen on account of the fact that it would be funny). I think a big moment of reflection for him was in The Faceless Ones where Valkyrie’s tooth gets broken and it’s a really traumatic experience for her, but she holds a brave face for Skulduggery and only breaks down crying when Kenspeckle expresses worry over her. The book kind of brushed over his reaction to it, but I really think he realized in that moment that he was actually hurting Valkyrie with the standards he was enforcing on her. This point is honestly pretty straightforward, but it’s also pretty relevant to their phase 1 dynamic and so I wanted to mention it. Pretty much all the trauma Valkyrie has can be arguably traced back to Skulduggery.

Because while Skulduggery definitely loves her and has his protective moments over her, he really does have an insistence on treating her as an adult, even at the points when she was barely a teenager. It gives Valkyrie a life where she has no safety bars on anything she does and is free to make her own mistakes and possibly get herself killed. And while he is willing to step in and help if she requests it, Valkyrie is also ridiculously independent (a trait that Skulduggery also encouraged) and clearly tried to avoid going to him with personal problems as best she could. While there are definitely issues to this approach to raising Valkyrie, I think Skulduggery was hoping to avoid becoming overly controlling of her and instead overcompensated by giving her full control of her own life, for better or for worse. Alternatively, it could be that Valkyrie’s extended freedom originally came from a branch of Skulduggery’s neglect of her, and later on in phase 1 just became a thing of habit.

Now, Valkyrie is a pretty independent person in phase 1. BUT. Since she has so much control over her own life, she refuses to socialize with other kids her age, which does lead to an emotional dependency on Skulduggery that is really apparent in the earlier half of phase 1. He’s effectively the god of her world, and even if she isn’t forced to do what he wants, she will do it with no hesitation or regard for her own well-being. Even when she’s an older teenager (16-18 range), it’s still pretty apparent that Skulduggery and whatever he wants or says is the first priority in her life, with everything else coming second. I also think this is a big reason as to why she dated Fletcher for a bit, because he was literally the only person she was hanging out with at the time who wasn’t literally hundred of years older than her.

Another thing I wanna point out that I always found really amusing is how physically comfortable they are with each other. Like, they’re detective partners who get into fights together, of course they’re gonna be pretty comfortable with each other, but it’s just so fucking funny. There is an entire scene in Death Bringer where Valkyrie is going about her morning routine (taking a shower, getting dressed, etc) and the whole time Skulduggery is following her around and chatting with her, and neither of them are weird about it or mention it at all. This is literally just normal for them (and also they’re conversation is kind of unhinged, I need to reread DB because there was SO much weird stuff in there). Valkyrie literally sleeps at his house on the regular, sometimes even more so than her own house. When Valkyrie finds out that the man is casually standing in her backyard, her reaction is to let him into her room through the window, which is so weird that even SOLOMON FUCKING WREATH commented on it. And while I do love having characters not being weird about other characters having bodies, having that dynamic between a teenager and an adult that her parents don’t know she hangs out with is absolutely wild.

And speaking of absolutely wild, having a “I’d fight loyally by your side until the end” scene with a fifteen-year-old is crazy, but so in-character for this series. I’m not complaining about it though, because the continual use of that phrase throughout this series sucker-punched my emotions every time and that’s exactly what I’m going for.

Something I also really liked throughout the series is them learning to place more trust in each other. In book 2, Valkyrie actually has a moment where she’s worried he’s going to kill her. In book 4, she’s worried his emotional breakdown will push him to physically harm her. In the first part of book 5, she’s subconsciously worried that he’ll kill her for being Darquesse. In the last part of book 5, she puts up no resistance and instead lies in his arms when he puts a gun to her head and threatens to shoot her. In book six, Skulduggery is brave enough to actually have a discussion with her about being Lord Vile. There are so many more examples of this, but I really adored their slowly growing relationship and how it was depicted throughout phase 1.

Don’t get me wrong though, the whole fiasco with Lord Vile in Death Bringer was really toxic. Specifically the fact that Skulduggery sort of emotionally blackmailed Valkyrie into forgiving him for being Lord Vile? I know that he didn’t mean for her to find out, but taking advantage of an emotionally vulnerable teenager who’s going through an especially rough part of her life right now is not a great thing to do.

I do understand why he did it though, because Skulduggery is really not normal whenever Valkyrie leaves, and he might have gone through another bout of mental instability if she actually left him because of Lord Vile. I think this part of him is best seen in the second half of LSoDM and the first half of DotL. He’s angry, lashes out, emotionally cold, and he threatens tries to shoot an eighteen-year-old for the crime of being Valkyrie’s reflection. He’s also so aggressive when they have to revive Valkyrie with the Sunstone, because he’s scared that he messed up and that he’s now going to lose her forever, which causes him to act really scary towards everyone around him. It’s definitely not a side of him that he likes and that’s why he’s so determined to stay with Valkyrie no matter what. Not phase 1 related, but I will always find Skulduggery’s explanation for what he was doing while Valkyrie was in Colorado hilarious because what do you mean you decided that a lapse in morals would be fine until Valkyrie gets back.

Skulduggery also seems to have a really hard time admitting with words that he loves someone (and given his history, I really do not blame him) but Valkyrie casually saying that she loves him in KotW and teasing him about it while Skulduggery will express that he loves her in literally any way other than actually saying the goddamn words (it takes him seven fucking years to actually say “I love you” yahoo) and it made for some really sweet but also heart-wrenching moments in the last three books of phase 1. Because Valkyrie doesn’t really need him to say that he loves her, because she knows it already. But still having him refuse to say it does kind of sting, and it’s fun to watch the two of them dance around their emotions like funny little acrobats.

What makes Skulduggery and Valkyrie’s dynamic in phase 1 so wild to me is the way that it kind of casually glazes over the raging abuse going on, but I actually really like that because it highlights just how much this series is written from Valkyrie’s perspective. She loves him so damn much, and you really can’t blame her for it. He gave her a life where she could express herself and do what she wanted and be with people that made her happy instead of being stuck in a school she hated, with people she hated, in a life she hated. She was traumatized and scarred by him but he gave her the opportunity to actually live, and no way in hell was she ever going to risk giving that life up and going to back to what she had before. Toxic as their phase 1 relationship was, he represented her freedom and autonomy and Valkyrie viewed any hardships she went through as a simple sacrifice necessary to keep what she had. It’s not healthy, but you kind of get it.

I love their phase 1 relationship so much, but there is so much to unpack between them and I definitely missed a lot, so everyone else feel free to add on your rambling.

[capn-twitchery]

wearing these around grace to help him work through his arctic trauma

[the-cheapskateler-show]

HAH! So THAT must be what your brain looks like when you tune into my show!!

[canine-teethed-sheets]

hey everyone, i got some very important news, specifically on what's to happen to this blog soon!

please take your small time to read, as it is kinda important to me ^^

hello, hello!! it's me, tumblr user its-paperd, coming to you live with an important announcement!!

to put it very very simply, my entire blog will be on a VERY long hiatus, much longer than my usual 5 to 7 days kind

reason behind this is kind of personal, but it does kind of relating to school and grades. to put it simply, my grades haven't been going well and i admit, i have been getting addicted to this app a bit. too much hahah ^^"

now here's the thing, while i say it'll be a hiatus here, there would be a possibility of my blogs... getting deleted.

now don't panic!! i'm not exactly sure if it would happen but it might be a possiblity, so while my blog is still here, if there's anything you want to archive from my blog, it's best to take action and reblog some as soon as you can

get some of my spices, as you will kekek /silly

' oh, but paperd, you're taking this so well, don't you care about us? '

i do!! from the bottom of my heart, i do. it's just that it has been a long time coming, and it was inevitable that it would happen so i mentally prepared myself before i can give a proper goodbye ^^

with all of this happening, i can only think of parting words before i go radio silent

now things are gonna get sappy for me, kekeke <x'D

( moots i'm so sorry you have to learn about this this way <x| )

[ —-—-—-—-— ]

to my two bestest friends, @psycho-chair and @unknownarmageddon , the two members of the kross trio!! thank you both so much for being my friends, the moments we had in pony town will never be forgotten, and the memories we shared too. i appreciate you two being my besties, and i'm very sad to see myself go but to whatever that may come through, just remember guys!! keep being swag for me >:] live laugh kross forever ‼️‼️

to @jun1per-t33th !! my silly friend and amazing artist!! i always appreciate all the memes you sent to me, and your art is a banger every time!! ily so much, juni mwah mwah /p

to @justanidiotartist , my homie friend bud!! thank you for being my mutual, and all the art you made i have always been amazed, you keep being your fun, spectacular self, and take care!! :D

( honourable mentions, ily all so much <3 <3 /p : @the-arcade-doctor, @skelle404 , @corrupted-icarus , @karineverse , @captain-kretsnik , @sunnemona , @cherrio-krispz , @glitchysquidd , @socksandbuttons , @yuriyuruandyuraart , toka!! i see you >:] , other mutuals i've interacted!! you all are the best!! )

[ —-—-—-—-— ]

and with all that, my play of the show is done, but never over!! i will try harder for you all and hopefully, i can come back with pride and joy to you all!! thank you for your support, and i shall see you all again, whenever it may be!!

[johnseeddickeater]

Nobody:

Jacob Seed when he realized he could escape:

[memento-morri-writes]

This is far from my best work, but it's 1:30am, and I needed to get this down before I slept or lost my mind. So here, take a snippet of Rook seeing Zara again for the first time in 3 years.

Trying, and failing, to keep his voice from shaking, [Rook] said “Hello, Captain.” Mouth still open in surprise, [Zara] replied “Well, hello yourself.” The reality of what she was seeing seemed to hit her as she rounded the desk. “Rook, is that really you?” He nodded. “It’s me.” Zara ran towards him, stopping just short of touching him, and said “What did she do to you?” Rook’s heart stuttered and he had to brush his fingers together to confirm Sigmar’s ring was still in place. Could she possibly see through its illusion? But then he remembered what Lanny had said. She knew where you were. His throat clenched and he choked out “Two years.” A wave of grief swept across Zara’s face as she said “I’m so, so sorry.” Rook shook his head vigorously. “It’s not your fault.” Zara ignored him. “It is my fault. I failed you. As your captain, it’s my responsibility to keep you safe, and I failed you.” Rook wanted to say something, to reassure her, but she pushed on. “She sent me letters, told me all the terrible things she was doing to you. I… I let you down.” Those words hit Rook with the force of a dozen cannonballs. Lanny had said that Zara knew Wolf had him, but knowing that Zara had been aware of what Wolf was doing to him… somehow that was more painful than any wound Wolf had ever inflicted. He barely managed to force his next words out around the lump in his throat. “Where were you?” And why didn’t you come? “She said she’d kill you if I came to get you. Or if I hired anyone to get you. You’re standing here because I stopped sailing.” 

(honorary one-time tag for @space-writes bc I remember you enjoyed my other bits about Rook and Zara.)

[ultraviolet-ink]

manfred is hot and people hate in him bc he's a knmy ass no cake bitch while gant has big booba and that suddenly forgives his crimes

i suppose this is what i get for DILF thirsting on main

[xxplastic-cubexx]

do you thubk charles xaiee a nd magenta idosmnl eio lkie boe frind s togater inn he srnsr of himsixuels sorry if this has any mispellings ❤

ringing up my best friend doug to decipher what. ANY of this means hang on