#caboose family headcanons

[blueberryattack]

i made a family tree for my Stex Fanfictions/Headcanons

This is a mess and Red Caboose as Dinah dad started out as a joke but fuck it.

Also Poppa and Memphis Belle are greyed out because sadly, ded.

[acoldghostlypresence]

STEX world building headcanons

Just some shit I've been thinking about, not fully cooked but eh.

The Apollo Victoria was built in the middle of nowhere at the top of a mountain originally to profit off mining operations in the area, when those mineral and coal deposits mostly dried up their financial situation became increasingly precarious. They were only able to stay open as long as they did coasting off the tourism, fame, and funding that came with housing the American National in Poppa and thus regularly hosting the Championships when he won. When Poppa retired it became essential that they find a new champion and fast since their old freight lines couldn't support the station alone, its why Greaseball became the defacto leader of the rolling stock once he won despite how mean he can be (it might also be a contributing factor in why he felt he had to cheat.)

In recent years the station has been looking into applying to become a heritage site due to their importance in train racing history and their preservation of old steamers that most other stations have long since abandoned.

Electra's (as of yet unnamed) station is positioned in the valley just below the Apollo Victoria they've just never needed to actually go up that way until the events of the show. I imagine afterwards they go out of their way to take jobs that let them visit as often as possible to rub how well they're doing in Greaseball's face... no other reason.

All the trains have a built in radio/walkie talkie system but they can only use it to talk to other people within their station, so all the Apollo Victoria trains can talk to each other and all the Components can talk to each other but neither group can talk across those lines (the nationals, being all from different stations, can't talk to anyone. Maybe they have a nationals only group chat set up for races though.) What makes Caboose's radio special is its lack of these limitations, he can talk to whoever whenever so long as they're in range and on a frequency he can access. Because of this he gets all the gossip from all the stations in the area, he's always up to date on what's happening sometimes before even Control is. CB has also illegally modified his radio because of course he has.

I've been imaging there being far more unnamed and unimportant freight and coaches off screen we don't see in the show working at the station.

Regarding Poppa/Momma's many kids, Rusty is their biological (as biologically related as a train can be) grandson while the freight are all foster kids they took in for one reason or another. CB aged out and now lives in his own shed but still visits for tea once a week.

Boxcars come in large batches and them all having identical names is not at all uncommon. The fact that there are only three Rockies at the station is abnormal and its because the rest of their siblings work for different companies far away. They regularly get post cards, letters, and gifts from their siblings and their shed is covered in them.

Pearl is trans. You already know this.

The fact that the Components belong too and only work with Electra isn't that weird, in fact it's pretty common for trucks and engines to pledge themselves to each other and become exclusive in this way, usually this is done as an emotional commitment between family or lovers. Its alot more high stakes for the trucks involved than the engine though, if something happens to an engine's trucks that's bad obviously but they'll survive, trucks on the other hand generally can't get far physically without an engine to push them so if anything happens to their engine they can become stranded. It's a problem all trucks face but it gets worse when you commit to one person and can no longer ask other engines to pick you up, something I'm sure Dinah was aware of when Greaseball uncoupled her and that Pearl at least briefly considered when trying to make up her heart between Electra and Rusty.

[agentcaboose]

Mexican Caboose headcanons in no particular order:

Caboose is a great cook but he isn't allowed to use the stove, or oven, or microwave, or sometimes the fridge but somehow his cereal always tastes better

Has an insane spice tolerance, to the point where Grif and Simmons started sneaking ghost peppers into his food to see what would happen

He was a folklorico dancer in high school, and his muscle memory will take over when he hears the polka from the warthog

No Sabo kid: can understand slow (robot) Spanish but can't speak it, there were so many kids in his house, his parents gave up trying to teach them all

His family is from Albuquerque, NM but he moved to Massachusetts to attend Harvard, it was the coldest four years of his life

His 17 sisters aren't all blood related, some are adopted, some were fostered and kept in touch, and some are cousins his parents took guardianship over

He is the tallest in the family, his dad calls him a "mountain mexican"

He has a tiger blanket that Church and Tucker (and now Wash) constantly steal

Calls everyone Miss and Mister because it's rude to call higher ups by just their first name, even his older cousins he calls Cousin [name]

He has dark, thick, curly hair that gets out of hand under his helmet, it drives Tucker insane attempting to cut it

The J stands for Jerónimo

[tabooiart]

STEX APPRECIATION MONTH DAY 15: CB

Favorite Actor(s): Michael Staniforth, Micahel Ebborall, Hans Johansson, Jeremy Kocal, Oliver Rhoe Thornton

Favorite Song/Scenes: What scene of his don't I love. He's so cute in Freight I love seeing him interact with the others. There's Me is SO IMPORTANT as a moment for both him and Dinah. And then of course Wide Smile, High Style is one of the best songs in the entire show go white boy go.

Favorite Costume(s): 80s-90s toy soldier Caboose goes SO HARD and they got the proportions so good. Early London CB also has a huge place in my heart. The headphones, the radio belt, the silver pants........ banger.

Favorite Ships/Friendships: Fav ship is ofc Electraboose those freaks are made for each other. His bestest friend ever is Dinah and he's also close with Dustin and the freight in general!! I love the freight being a little family :)

Headcanons: CB was genuinely trying to help Electra win the race. He was originally helping Greaseball but decided to turn against him out of defensiveness of Dinah. The big crash was an accident as Rusty pulled into the lead and Greaseball got more aggressive.

Unpopular Opinion: If they ever bring CB back I don't want them to bring back toy soldier CB (as much as I adore him). I want them to bring back grimy little trucker CB. For fun.

[leanuponmybar]

so kayna's recent stories of her playing the wii during rolling stock got me thinking

Starlight Gaming Headcanons (these are compatible with any version of these characters)

Rusty has the Trainyard Wii. For the first few years he had it, it was in his shed which led to many a train coming to his room to play. There's been many a time where Rusty would get back from a long day of work and just see the Nationals or literally any other group. in his shed. playing his Wii.

After a bit of time passed, he was like "fuck it" so he moved it to the whatever the equivalent of a living room/common area is in the yard

Rusty loves Pokemon. Control's dad got him into the first generation and has been hooked ever since. Pearl likes it too but mainly likes it since she likes the designs of the pokemon. Her favorite pokemon is Eevee.

Him and pearl go on pokemon dates together where they go out on the rails, find different spots on the railroad line, and try and find all the pokemon they can on pokemon go. It's precious

Besides pokemon for the cute desgins, she's a Mario Kart/Wii Sports F I E N D. She either mains Luigi or Bowser so she can be tall and scary. If you go against her, be prepared. She's oddly competitive

99.9% of the time, Dinah likes games such as cooking mama, sims, and disney dreamlight valley but when she's pissed, she mainly plays Mortal Kombat and pictures the opponents as whoever she's mad at

Dustin likes FNAF and knows a little too much about the lore. He watches Game Theory religiously

Flat Top, being the living shitpost that he is, likes shitposty games like Zelda Cdi. He mainly plays Call of Duty to laugh at the name and to roast whoever's in the lobby with him. He likes making incels and children cry.

Joule loved Minecraft. Full Stop. She's really the only Gamer within the components

To calm down after a long day of being The Sane One in the Yard, Wrench likes to play Animal Crossing

Buffy likes Sonic underground only because the theme song slap

ashley likes the Oregon trail just to give her pc families shitty names and to give them dysentary

gb and the nationals love just dance and the sims but they say they like gta, madden, and COD to keep up with the reputation. They know all the kpop and Rasputin choreos by heart

Buffy likes Sonic Underground only because the theme song is fire and Sonic Boom because the show's insane and on crack

The coaches each have their own Animal Crossing Islands and they go to each other's islands all the time

Dinah likes to listen to Video game soundtracks as she's cooking. The Wii Sports, Wii Sports Resort, and Animal Crossing soundtracks have a special place in her heart

You would think Papa/Mama likes chill games like Pong and Tetris, but when they're alone, they yippy those kayees in Red Dead Redemption

every so often, like once a month or so, the entire yard gets together to have a Mario Kart and Smash tournament. they call it "Race Night but No One Gets Hurt". The hosts are Wrench and Dustin since s o m e o n e has to host this chaos thats s a n e

one of the rules is that Caboose has lost controller privileges. for obvious reasons

here's some kayna!pearl reaction images that are gems

feel free to put any other ideas in the tags/comments!

[femmepeterparker]

well, since you've been getting shitty anons, here I am asking what your favorite trans!tucker headcanons are :}

aww thank u

buckle up bc i have quite a fewww

-picked a family name. its regal

-no op. idk it just feels right for tucker. i feel like he'd say some shit like "im too well endowed"/"im obviously gods favorite look at my body"

-never wanted kids so junior is a huge bump in the road for him. always saw himself as a bachelor for life and now he has a kid (who he loves, he loves junior) and sometimes he wonders what life would have been like without junior

-unfortunately junior's conception is still. nonconsensual. jokes about tucker fucking aliens are funny but he seems so genuinely confused and upset in canon upon learning of his pregnancy so i dont really think that changes

-sanghelli pregnancies are shorter than humans but not that much shorter. he's pregnant for a good couple months before having junior.

-doc performs the c section. it is a goddamn miracle that both junior and tucker survive

-post pregnancy tucker develops glowing symbols and markings along his skin. the c section scar and his stretch marks glow too

-sometimes when tucker is emotional, his eyes will glow teal. it scares caboose

-junior and the c section absolutely ruined his uterus and tucker is lowkey thrilled about it. he considers it a diy hystorectomy

-everyone knows except wash??? like, they dont clock tucker they just know hes trans mainly bc of junior, but wash... just doesnt put two and two together until tucker tells him

-speaking of wash. he is demisexual and lowkey not very interested in sex but tucker is super into him so hes like. a service top. theyre kinda messy. its okay tho

-tucker learns sanghelli somewhere between seasons 4 and 6

-junior comes with him to iris

-wash isnt the step dad, hes the dad who stepped up

ask me more about him i love him

[lordvonbunnyv]

Do you have any soft headcanon’s?

Let’s see… I’m not too sure what the term soft headcanon means, but I think I might have a few…

.so after watching a video about Gordon’s family tree and finding out that Ryan and Gordon have the same builder which would technically make them family. After Ryan and Gordon find out that they are technically distant cousins because they have the same builder, they try to reconnect and treat each other as family, which turned out to be much harder to do, basically Ryan is this distant cousin that no one knew about until the family reunion. Hilarity ensues.

.in my ttte human AU, Annie and Clarabel sometimes invite the others for brunch, of course who can say no to free food. They make arguably the best pancakes on the island.

.Diesel in my human AU often goes to the pond to feed the ducks, Duck also likes to go to the same pond and feed the ducks. This is where all softness ends.

.Cranky in the regular TTTE AU has a “pet” seagull that he “raised from an egg”. One of the seagulls made a nest on top of him and laid an egg, that seagull just comes and goes and is a wild seagull that needs to eat half of Cranky’s operator’s sandwich or else it will dive bomb him, and Cranky will refuse to work until the seagull is properly fed.

.Thomas often mentors Philip and teaches him the same things that Edward taught him when he was young. Philip was sent to Wellsworth for a while to get more familiar with trucks before going back to Knapford. Philip also had taken a liking to Toby.

.Philip was originally from Pennsylvania and used to have an American accent but lost it when he came to the island. He still sometimes uses American terms such as “cars”, “caboose”, and “engineer”. He and Caitlin who was also from America often talk to each other in their native accents and help each other get adjusted to life in a different country. Philip has yet to win a race with Caitlin.

That’s all I can think of right now… I think I do have a few soft headcanons for my OCs, but I don’t think those would classify as a headcanon since they are my characters if you get what I mean.

[cswagzx]

i will be posting my personal red vs blue headcanons :3

Red Team

Sarge: I personally think he’s mixed with white and native american, and based off of the scrips that were never meant to be, he’s also Bisexual with no preference.

Simmons: this is like a collective thing within the fandom but i think he’s a red head with blue eyes and freckles, and my little headcanon is that he’s gay and trans :3

Grif: Native Hawaiian with the most long and luscious curly hair you’ve ever seen, hazel eyes, and scruffy facial hair that’s just unkept.

Donut: gay little white boy who dyes his hair bleach blonde, green eyes and asexual.

Grif and Simmons are dating. we all know this. they just do long distance and see each other on holidays.

Blue Team

Church: Korean american, dark brown eyes, closeted bisexual with a women pref.

Caboose: Mexican native american, tan skin, blue eyes, scruffy black hair, and he’s aroace.

tucker: extreme hypersexual, bi with women pref but his dumbass is dating wash.

tex: white. strawberry blonde hair (she’s got a lot of red heads in her family), green eyes, and she 100% has a tongue and eyebrow piercing. she’s also straight.

Sister: pretty much identical to grif, only differences are that her eyes are brown, she has freckles, and she’s got hella blonde highlights in her hair.

Carolina: i know that carolina and york were sort of canon but i just think that she’s a lesbian.

Wash: Bi with a male pref, still dyes his hair blonde (donut helps), his roots are brown because he likes the blonde+brown combo, his eyes were blue but slowly faded to grey over time, heavy eyebags and an unkept beard due to stress (again, donut helps with it)

Doc: Black!!! that man is black!!! wears glasses, has dreads, and a few beauty moles on his face, he’s also gay and dating donut because why not.

[slyvester101]

ur tuckington posts are so cute, how do u think wash would be with junior? i think he'd be so stressed over trying to get junior to like him

Ooh, yes. I love thinking about how Junior comes into play in Tuckington.

Tucker has definitely bragged about Junior to Wash before, talking about how smart and awesome his kid is so Wash knows about him and knows how important he is to Tucker so once they start dating, he definitely stresses over whether or not Junior will like him. 

I also think it’d be funny if Wash didn’t know Junior was an alien until like, right before they met because Tucker is one hundred percent an unreliable narrator and forgot to tell Wash about how he gave birth to the now seven foot ten-year-old half Sangeheili after being selected to fulfill some aliens’ prophecy. 

Wash had many questions. 

Other than that, I think Wash is pretty good with Junior. I like the headcanon that Wash has sisters (he is definitely a middle child and you can fight me on that) so he knows how to work with kids and while he’s unpracticed and a little clumsy and maybe a bit confused (“how does human child rearing translate into alien child rearing?”), he’s got spirit and he gets attached to this kid very quickly.

Junior also likes Wash, mainly because he’s one of the few people he can actually play-wrestle with, aside from Caboose of course, but also because he’s nice and didn’t try to shoot or kill Junior when they first met and he’s good to his dad and he gets Junior some of the best snacks ever— (The list goes on for a while).

Tucker damn near proposed when he saw how soft Wash got with his kid. It doesn’t help that Junior will call Wash a secondary parental term in Sangheili that only Tucker understands. Wash is very touched when he finds out, the sap.

But yeah, they’re a happy family and this is totally canon and not just my wishful thinking. Thanks for asking

[silverkittenx9]

Very nice headcanons 🥰🥰 I personally think Satan struggles with a bit of self-esteem from growing up in a shitty family. Despite this, he is proud of his big caboose 🤣 And yeah, do not make fun of his weight (or redness). "WHO DARES TO CALL THE GREAT, ALL-POWERFUL SATAN FAT?! I am just big-boned and rotund."

Heaven is the opposite of Hell, so of course it'd probably exist in some shape or form. We don't wanna make it too much like Hazbin Hotel or Helluva Boss, but it can work. Lucifer must be a PTSD trigger word for him 🤔

And him just giving up trying to get rid of the moles and being like, "Okay, I guess you can all be my minions now." is somewhat in-character for him. And of course they follow him out of fear! They're working for the devil, after all. Satan also has no friends, so it's good company. Same goes for the mate thing (and yes, he is definitely bi).

The fact his horns and tail are weak spots to him is plausible 👍 Although I love to smother him with puppies and kittens, who love to play with just about anything that can move. A tail can certainly move around, so it's a great chew toy 🤣🤣 His horns make for a great climbing structure too. I wonder how Satan would feel to have a kitten perch on his horns or a puppy yank on his tail.... would he feel weak? Eh, he'd feel happy 😊

Gonna do character headcanons for funsies, and of course I'm starting with the big guy himself; Satan!

-I headcanon that Heaven exists in Antonblast (cant have Hell without a Heaven) and that Satan was once an angel like in a lot of biblical texts. Back then he was called Lucifer and he was cast out for being way too prideful; and given his personality in-game, that hasn't changed! Also don't call him Lucifer, he *really* hates that.

-Aside from his insecurity about his redness, Satan's actually very proud of his body and looks! Sure, that rotund physique is mainly down to stress eating (running Hell is a stressful job) but he takes a *lot* of pride in his body. He usually responds to comments about his weight with things like "There's just more of me to worship!" (just don't poke fun at his weight or redness, that's a good way to end up as a stomped out stain on the floor)

-He never really hired the moles as minions, they just kept showing up (Hell *is* underground) and he got tired of having to destroy them; so now he just has them as a very expendable workforce. They follow him purely out of fear, unlike the big bosses, who *mostly* like and respect him.

-Much like that 'finding a mate' voiceline would imply, Satan is single and *hates* it. To him, he's got good looks and a great personality, there should be people fighting to be his lover! Plus it gets lonely down in Hell, he could use some company that aren't imps or moles. That said he is rather picky, if he's finding a woman (or man, because Satan is totally bi) they gotta be *almost* as beautiful and smart as him.

-His horns and tail are tender spots to him, and he usually doesn't like having them touched. Grabbing hold of his horns will make him lightheaded, and yanking on his tail will cause him to get weak in the knees. They're good ways to weaken him, but for the love of all that is unholy don't grab his tail to do this; he alway falls on his *ass*

[marastriker]

Which Caboose (AV,CB,BV) would need therapy the most?

AV is fine. And set in his ways anyway, he probably wouldn't even think he needed it. (And also he's no longer around in my headcanon 😔)

I think in my headcanon CB needs it the most...he ran away and tried to forget every bad thing that happened to him and never sat down to process it. He already had some developmental trouble as a kid, and now, he just has trouble seeing reality the same way as an average train.

It's been hard for him to maintain relationships and jobs due to this issue - hopping yards and trying to convince everyone there that he is friendly and there to help. Even if that's not always how he feels.

I'm going to have CB and BV reunite at some point and I think Bee will encourage him to seek help - because BV is trying to be better, and he wants better for his brother too.

It might be a bit of a hassle, but.

[applied-juice]

Hello Mr. Strider, what are you thoughts about the one and only Jake fucking English?

why are u calling me strider. anyway

do I like them: very much so, hes v interesting

5 good qualities: kind, supportive, isnt afraid to stand up for his friends, witty, and his love for guns is amusing lol

3 bad qualities: non confrontational, willfully ignorant, kinda selfish

favourite episode/etc: the entire flashback with him and brain ghost dirk lol

otp: dirkjake

brotp: jake and his prospit family, and roxy

ot3: dirkjakehal.....ahaha

notp: dont have one (i think)

best quote: "im laughing my caboose straight off the track" cant forget

headcanon: he sleeps naked

also a doodle

[sharkface-daydreams]

rvb cooking headcanons because i love food and cooking and I know some of these people can burn water just by thinking about it (affectionate)

Blue Team:

Church (alpha): basic skills. can make easy mac and has definitely hacked together ketchup and hot sauce to make fake bbq sauce when they ran out like any frat boy worth at least half his salt. however baking mystifies him.

Tucker: almost the same boat as alpha, but I like to think he tried to learn to make a few things because of Junior. maybe some sangheili and human ‘kid’ foods like whatever their equivalent of mac and cheese is.

Caboose: the stove spontaneously combusts in self defence when he’s reaching for it. he’s very good at setting the table and pouring juice though. When left to his own devices (leftovers) he’ll do awful things like put maple syrup on his mac and cheese... and enjoy it.

Tex: makes church and tucker cook for her, not that she needs to eat, but because she likes to sit at the table or counter and heckle them about their lackluster cooking skills and watch them suffer

Kai: she could probably be good at cooking if she wanted to, but that’s a lot of effort, and why do that when you can use your good looks and charms to get stupid guys to buy you fancy dinners and champagne?

Wash: listen. I know this guy is white as fuck. I grew up with white as fuck family. I know exactly how this man cooks. It’s bland. It’s by the book. He underuses salt and sneezes every time he smells pepper. He’s capable of pasta, weird underseasoned casseroles with not enough sauce, and a select handful of crockpot recipes that are either really good, or really weird, or both.

Red Team

Sarge: he knows how to work a grill, and knows how to cook meat, eggs, and grits, and operate the fancy coffee machine he installed in Lopez, and that’s where it stops. Gets mad if you say you don’t like grits, and will make you sit and eat it until it’s gone.

Simmons: Thinks he can cook. He’s had to make his own vegan meals for a long time because no one else will actually substitute meat and animal ingredients. But that doesn’t mean he’s great. Most of his vegetable substitutions are approximations and his black bean burgers always turn out dry. He has been able to trick Grif into eating and enjoying vegan snacks, but only to turn around and laugh and tell Grif what he’s actually eating. Because the fun is in getting to see Grif’s angry face afterwards.

Grif: Knows how to cook, and cook well, but can rarely be arsed to put it to practice. One of those people who genuinely enjoys reading cookbooks. He’s pretty creative and scrappy, having had to make sure he and Kai ate alright as kids while their mom was doing whatever it was that wasn’t looking after them. Probably knows the recipes to various carnival/circus foods like funnel cake and deep-fried anything. He and Kai can spin up cotton candy into fancy shapes like nobody’s business.

Donut: Not so great at cooking, but is a whiz at baking. When he deigns to bake, the results are eagerly scooped up by Reds and Blues alike, sometimes resulting in ridiculous heists to get at them before the other team can. He cannot for the life of him make donuts, though. They always come out rough, with tiny holes that are overstuffed with glaze. Sarge seems to enjoy them, though.

Lopez: Hates the very notion of human food and digestion, and is resentful that his body houses not only Sarge’s overclocked coffee machine, but also a temperature-controlled snack storage accessed at his hiney. He has access, as a robot, to the entire internet’s worth of recipes and theoretically could cook some incredible things. But he will not. He refuses. The day he does anything nice for these assholes willingly is the day they’ll have to cart him off to the scrapyard.

Carolina: She can microwave water for tea and coffee, but has screwed up easy mac before. Has some memories of cooking with her dad at a very young age, and remembers the recipe to the dish they always had whenever Allison returned from deployment.

Asshole day at the skittle factory:

Dr. Leonard Church: Probably did most of the cooking. Allison was deployed a lot especially with the war starting. Let Lina do little things to help like stir cold things or count out ingredients for him before she was old enough to work with the stove etc.

Aiden Price: In general I can’t see this man ingesting anything except extremely fancy tea. I tried to imagine him having a burger and the fucker showed up with a fork and knife to slice it up. But if I had to consider whether he knows how to cook for himself, I think he’d put enough effort and research into it to ensure enough nutrients, and possibly would insist on cooking for himself to ensure he wasn’t being poisoned.

Agent York: Overzealous, insists he knows what he’s doing, consistently sets things on fire. Can whip up a mean cocktail though.

Connecticut: Same boat. Burns things but at least she has the cojones to admit she doesn’t know what she’s doing. Pretty good at cutting up fruit and veg for snacks though. Charcuterie/stuff plate queen.

South Dakota: hates cooking mostly because she was expected to learn as the ‘girl’ of the family. She retained the basic mechanics of cooking like meat and pasta and oiling a pan so things don’t stick, but won’t volunteer and will probably fight you if you ask her to cook. Prefers doing stuff plate nights with CT.

North Dakota: He knows how to work a coffee maker and do microwave popcorn.

Wyoming: Can bake, but will only do so to make things to eat for teatime. Everything's always more than a bit dry. He defends this by insisting it's supposed to be eaten while drinking tea to moisten it.

Florida: Average level of cooking and baking competence, but has a fondness for strange and unnerving culinary experiments he attempts to get the others to test. Most people know better than to try these horrors.

Maine: Likes meat and carbs, and generally doesn’t make anything else. Not real big on seasoning or flavor either. Better with a grill than a pan on a burner.

Iowa: Ovens fear him. They explode in self-defense when he nears.

Idaho: One of those people that reads cookbooks for fun. Has a “Recipes from the Forgotten Realms” cookbook. Isn’t always successful, but the results are usually interesting. Edible, at least.

Ohio: Stacks her PBJ sandwiches with a half inch of peanut butter. Occasionally adds bananas. The rest of the kitchen might as well be Sangheilios.

Doc: Has tried to learn how to cook via lessons and tutorials and memorize a few recipes but he usually remembers them wrong, sets the wrong temperature or time, stuff like that. Donut’s tried to tutor him but he’s just kinda hopeless. Offered to trade vegan recipes with Simmons but Simmons was like ‘nah.’ (O’Malley is only interested in making poisoned food.)

Extra Colorful Morons:

Locus: knows how to cook, finds preparing ingredients and following recipes to be relaxing. Is extremely particular about how his kitchen is arranged. Leads to a lot of arguments in red team kitchen

Felix: Felix? Cooking? Can u imagine. He knows how to microwave coffee and maybe slap a sandwich together. Either wheedles someone else (Locus) into cooking for him, or gets food pre-made from somewhere.

Sharkface: You didn’t think all that fire was just for show, did you? Fire’s a kitchen’s best friend. Spent some time job hopping after the Freelancers crushed him, some of these being dishwashing and line cook jobs, whatever was needed to pay bills. There’s something very satisfying about roasting food over an open flame grill.

Siris: Can cook some things, mostly things his wife likes and family recipes handed down. Not particularly skilled but what he cooks is made with love.

Doyle: This man screws up tea when it’s a mug of hot water and a teabag. Useless. (affectionately frustrated)

Kimball: Knows how to make a desperation stew out of snared game and local root veg. After so long in a civil war has to be reintroduced to the concept of enjoying food for flavor.

Dr. Grey: She’s one of those people who drink brightly colored drinks out of lab beakers like other people use a mug. Highly unnerving to anyone who visits her office. She knows how to cook of course, but what’s the fun of doing things by the book? Don’t eat anything she offers you. ANYTHING. Especially if she’s got that studious glint in her eyes like she’s going to document every little twitch of expression you make as you eat.

[akalegos]

the simulations dont lie SO WHY DID THEY LIE CHURCH!

the characterisation is truly truly so strange cause it felt like they just reset them to their starting point when they had the characters obviously be just coming out from s13. where they all JUST had their finale fight together accepting to fight alongside one another or die trying. its frustrating cause whether the writers realise it or not, they've made a story about opposing teams coming together as one and considering each other as one; they're a found family that sticks together whether they like it or not. its so strange that the start isn't them trying to find tucker cause like. one finale red team fight, one more big adventure. AND SARGE ISNT TAKING IT? (obviously he does but its only after prompting by caboose. but he really doesn't need all that when he does have a reason to hunt meta down)

emotional jerkoff season is really an accurate descriptor. everytime i thought they were going to do a joke, where they usually would, itd just. continue to drag. and there's was no punchline. its strange and doesn't feel like rvb. it does have moments where it feels like their original charm is still there! but then it doesn't. and you can really feel like its been a while since they've written for these characters. the music. the music too ohmygod

if you saw my priv twt after i watched the season you would know how much the music pissed me off. rvb started with barely anything but some consoles and copys of halo. it didn't have that much music. but jesusss it was just constant that it didn't feel right. you dont need music to make a moment happen. you need it to emphasis what you're putting down and it just felt like they were slapping it on in hopes that it would work. but it doesn't. it just . falls flat and cheapens any moment they had.

i hated sarge's death scene. like i love sarge!! as the season premiered (for first members) i was graduating with my sarge figure going "he's safe and sound ^^" i could go on and on about sarges relationship with the reds and how i feel its often neglected by fans and everyone involved. cause there really is something there!! people just look over it sometimes cause he's a "grumpy old white military man" but hes not. hes soooo much more (and also not white i refuse this idea). so yeah, im like. sad. that he dies. cause i like sarge! and above that? IT WAS SOOOO FUCKING BAD . HE WAS STANDING RIGHT BY THE DOOR IT WAS SO OBVIOUS HE WAS ABOUT TO GET STABBED.

i enjoyed the actual scene of him being stabbed? idk those shots make my brain happy but thats more just being interested in cinematography and all that. but the follow up the speech the talking and he just kept talkingggg. someone tweeted that the original last line sarge was gonna have was "Simmons, we went on a mission, and all my men came home. thats a good thing. its a good day. today is a good day..."

is it a little cheesy with the "today is a good day to die" line? a little. but i like it. its so much more fitting. its also just a little fan service-y with the whole sarge knowing grif can be better. I know thats a headcanon people hold, and I do believe sarge cares about grif. but the delivery of it.. is really really bad. idk i just dont think sarge would say all that on his deathbed? it really feels like the show dont tell thing. sarge is a fighter! he's been killed before. yet he accepts it so easily that im just a little. unsure that its real? it feels fake. like he feels that but he wouldn't say all that. all of them are a little ooc really, but its in ways where like, yeah thats . kindaaa them? they have everything but ever so slightly tweaked that it feels like its not completely them. and sarge's death scene feels like one of the more extreme examples.

I do like the little "am i doing it right?" "you're doing fine" from grif and simmons. that was cute. the button too that feels in character with how sarge went crazy and made cardboard and voicelines of all his men back ard s5..? its fitting.

though once it gets here you really do miss them having larger fighting groups. 3v1? granted a very powerful 1, and one of them being missing? Lopez should have been there. he was there at the beginning but he really should have tagged along. Like his creator, practically his dad died and he doesn't even get to avenge him? no matter how much he hated the reds I feel like he should have been there he's part of the group! if the blue rookie has to fight the red rookies should too! and like. DONUT WHERE THE FUCK WAS HE.

they said hes like admiral or whatever but he should have been there. his leader died and he doesn't even get to be there? AND THEY GAVE SIMMONS DONUTS THING. ONLY DONUT HAS THE GOOD THROWING ARM HELLO!!! it felt off that donut wasn't there. oddly enough it made me like the s16-17 more than s19 because of that? like yeah, the story can be jarring but it still feels like rvb enough that idgaf if its goofy with the god AI stuff. its also the one time donut gets to be more than just a gay joke! i loved that!! and sarge's line when the world encounters a paradox hits so much harder than whatever he said in s19. you really felt that he died. (youknow before they reveal the world just got reset and that they're alive)

jason revealing that this storyline was meant to be 3 seasons really puts everything into perspective. it really needed that 3 seasons. dylan and jax morphing into one probably didn't need to happen if it was 3 seasons.

moments felt rushed, it felt jam-packed and there was probably time to include donut and lopez (and doc instead of him dying off screen) if it was 3 seasons. maybe wash wouldn't need to be locked inside the hospital for so long. there would have been time for Carolina to be around more when she desperately should have been.

I will say I like tex coming back, in the form of the bgc's memories, not a painful failure, not a shadow, but someone that kicks ass is cool and is a friend. a friend in the bgc's weird ways. and I like that it was tex that asked for it the unit to be destroyed.

wash saying that it could still be preserved is so interesting tho, memory is the key but to a painful degree. I like it. And Carolina agreeing that it was better destroyed? perfect.

also carolina coming in like maine was cool i cant lie. I do hate the use of Round 1 though. I got obsessed with the song before s19 dropped when I was having my music nostalgia trip but i really wished they remixed a song that was about tex and about Carolina. not a tex song. its their moment!! not just tex's!!!

i wont comment on the fights, everything I could say would just be summary of "I miss Monty". cause his fights really did elevate rvb. so did the music.

but sadly they've already chosen a more corporate feel with the stock music and strange mainstream writing. the older seasons are still, somewhere... so I can always just go back there.

I really am thankful tex's VA came back to help say goodbye, even with the bad terms I'm grateful she came back. I couldn't see anyone else voicing Tex.

It's strange. rvb was always built on top of character dynamics because really thats all they had. and it sorely lacked that because they had everything else to use. shows that even with endless options it doesn't really help. that you could make gold with nothing.

s19 really needed that. the characters are already strong, just not utlised. I love that moment with tucker snapping out for caboose. thats what the season needed more of. a show of how much these multi-colour jerks care about each other. how much they've impacted each other. I like the moment of sarge going back for caboose. please it just needed more of that. I do agree the reds wouldn't have left caboose there, but I can see them forgetting and realising caboose isn't with them. It needed more of just that sort of energy. Wash seeing tucker as the meta, another person he cared about turned into a husk of themselves. Carolina seeing tex fight and fighting alongside her to save a friend, their friend, from the ai. grif and simmons going along with caboose because they recognise that caboose is hurt, even when its not the stereotypical look of being hurt. just that. more of that. they should have all been at red base, not separated again. they're not the same useless sim troopers from the start of the series. they're actual fighters, survivors. tougher than they show because they're together.

the lack of numbers hurt that, even if lopez and donut arent really utilised, having them around makes would make it feel more whole. they may not always treat each other right, but they are family. friends is too affectionate for them. but they are a family. a sort of family. and family should be together in such a time.

i dont like being too bitter about rvb writing. i feel like some people overdo it a little that its almost like they dont want to watch the show, which is fine but man... just say you dont want to be here and go its fine! but thats not to say i dont ever feel upset about the show's decisions. i do feel bitter. I can see what they were trying to do, and I like what they put down. I just really wished they had more time. and a stronger hold of these characters. they wanted to say goodbye, but i really wished they said goodbye.

feeling grateful that they even tried is so telling. but I am still grateful regardless.

i love rvb, it has its faults, it has its very few merits. but i still love it.

hey akalegos... justg finished watching the new rvb season and unblocked all the tags i think im gonna throw up

How’s it going emptylotfiasco….

[leonardalphachurch]

sarge rvb

anon i’m so sorry you asked me about a guy i have so little opinions about

First impression

uh. this is actually hard for me to answer bc do you mean like… my first impression or like. the body’s? bc i don’t remember what the fuck host at the time thought and my first impression was uh. well i came preloaded with impressions. i guess i can answer from a fictive perspective? in that case it was “holy fuck that guy seems like a hard ass i’m so glad he’s not our co”

Impression now

stop fuckin resetting his characterization oh my god. WHY did miles feel the need to make him hate the blues again in season 11. so fucking dumb. he had his character arc man he was PERFECT in season 8 you don’t have to have him keep learning this lesson.

Favorite moment

gotta be the season 8 monologue. sarge is objectively hilarious but none of his jokes really leave any impact on me

Idea for a story

uh we have that one with his bastard daughter… besides that just like, a character study piece exploring his struggle with idolizing war but also knowing how horrible it is. and how what he REALLY wants is the companionship that war brought with his men but the toxic masculinity and military industrial complex has made him incapable of expressing that through anything but violence

Unpopular opinion

he’s not red teams dad. he could’ve been if his character hadn’t reset in 11 but it did and now he’s way too fucked to actually take on any father figure role

Favorite relationship

probably him and caboose. caboose is so genuine with his emotions it runs off on sarge and he’s the only person he can actually express affection for.

Favorite headcanon

uuuhhhh??? oh that sarge had a family that all died bc of the war. he was already in the army at this point and never got to say goodbye to any of them.

guess i had more to say about him than i thought. still probably the most i’ve thought about sarge all year tho lmao

[suppenzeit]

Here are some assorted caboose family thoughts I've managed to write down :) enjoy

-They're all brothers, but AV is like, significantly older (im talking like +15 years older), so after their parents stopped being around, AV kinda became their father-figure

-AV has accepted that he is an old man. He's tired of constant chaos. He still causes trouble and will gladly help either of his brothers if he deems their ideas good enough, but his days of non-stop trouble are over. His regular day consist of mostly just chilling or making sure that CB doesn't get into too much trouble.

-CB, in contrast, is complete chaos. He's always getting into trouble and always pestering his brothers to join him in troublemaking. Very restless, has almost infinite energy.

-BV is weird. He usually only does things if there's something in it for him. It's very hard to persuade into the type of trouble that CB and AV like.

-Game nights are a disaster. They all love card games, and they all love to cheat. Any outsider that joins has no chance of ever winning. Every game is just a competition to see who is the best at cheating.

-CB likes to pick on BV because it's very easy to get a reaction from him. AV often finds himself mediating whatever fights they get into.

-I HAVE to include my most self-indulgent headcanon. Each of the cabeese has their own favorite Finnish candy. AV likes salmiakki, BV likes Da Capo, and CB likes kettukarkki/Pihlaja!