#c) i HATE it here

[neurovarious]

[please-picturemeintheweeds]

“I’ll save all my romanticism for my inner life and I’ll get lost on purpose. This place made me feel worthless.” is one of the saddest things Taylor has ever written.

[raayllum]

We're in trouble

+ bonus:

[art-is-kayos]

Sight of a Star - Blue-ish Star Ryōshū and Don Quixote

[maniacace]

so this is how streaming platforms want us to consume content nowadays huh

[yannaryartside]

Claire and her patients

And why I think she may harm Carmen

It’s incredible how many stories told by Claire about her interactions with injured people are disturbing in close up. I honestly need someone to put a name to it (like clinical one) because so far, it's just disturbing.

In S3, I thought the show was doing a number that made me see her process the pain after the breakup and work helping others through it. I cared about that; I did. It is difficult not to root for someone in pain. But then it got bizarre the more medical scenes we had. Mainly the one where she committed malpractice

The lacking

When she was telling the story about the girl with a million cuts, you know, a kid she almost killed because of a medical error (one that was actually totally preventable) there are so many things wrong with it. Some audience members have stated that scene was to show that “Claire is not perfect,” but that shit didn’t have that effect on me at all. It was a relief to see other people felt this way, some in this fandom even said it was so unnatural it made them laugh. And I am curious about why that is.

From the beginning, the lack of guilt surrounding the incident has been glaring for me. It's not like we see her break down crying or be afraid of what Carmy is going to think of her as a doctor. She committed malpractice, mistake or not. Doctors go out of business for things that they cannot prevent. They are not ashamed of their work; they are ashamed of the result. That harmed somebody.

I watched a lot of medical-related shit (as I assume most people do). The character Joan Watson in Elementary stopped working as a doctor thoroughly after losing one (1) patient over something she could not predict or prevent. A medical board gave her permission to work, but it was still not enough. She was so afraid of hurting someone else and was so ashamed that she was manipulated by the son of his deceased patient to give him money. In “The West Wing,” Abbey Bartlett was a doctor before being the First Lady, and she had an incident in an operation that resulted in the death of her patient (an infection that got complicated). She defended her work, she is possitive she didn’t make a mistake and we are inclined to believe that because we have seen her character admit to her faults before.

There was no shame in Claire. You can process your emotions however you want, but it would make more sense even if you were defensive. Why did she tell that story…as she was also the victim? Maybe the fact that the story relates to malpractice makes it difficult to say it without sounding bad, but there were better ways to make her empathetic than suspicious.

“I was slammed,” as she could ever justify a mistake as stupid as the one she made. I know understaffing hospitals is a serious issue, and overworked doctors can make stupid mistakes, but she didn’t say things like “I should have seen it” or “I have nightmares about it.” And she told it in a way that seemed like she was expecting Carmy to understand it wasn’t her fault. Even if it wasn’t, doctors would carry guilt about malpractice and the harm they were accomplices of, even if literally no divine intervention could have made a difference. By not allowing Claire this very normal emotion, you are setting her apart to the audience members who are paying attention.

The warning

And then, somehow, the story is more about how young and beautiful her patient was…I am sorry, but that almost felt… fetishizing? It reminded me of those poems people made online about having a story of self-harming: “She was so beautiful in her scars.” Maybe that’s me stretching it.

She also keeps telling the stories of what caused the injuries in the first place, and not ironically, is always people doing something risky/stupid in the first place. She is never seen taking care of a bullet wound or a severe illness suddenly worsening. It’s always people putting their lives at risk.

And that’s an element that terrifies me, thinking of who Carmy is and his gif above. He has self-harming hallucinations, sometimes in the middle of dangerous situations, and his mental condition prevents him from reacting accordingly. He is absent as if he was hight/drunk, but it is his mental illness. It may even be tied to a suicidal underline.

And then you hear this story about a girl that got almost killed by Claire’s negligence; in that moment, she needed help getting better because she had an accident. She was not able to prevent her injury. She was also drunk when it happened, so she had no equipment to react accordingly. She is the equivalent of Carmen.

I need help thinking it is supposed to be a coincidence. These writers are not stupid, even if you could justify how Claire is written as saying, “Carmy is supposed to be in love with the simple” (which is such a lame excuse. People can be simple and interesting).

Wouldn’t it be cruel in hindsight to make Carmy’s true love the one person who also has a story of harming people in similar conditions of danger that he had?

I would like to quote something I read about the scene that introduces us to Claire, the story of “why” she wanted to be a doctor. In most medical-related media, these events tend to be very traumatic to the character, “I lost my mother to cancer and wanted to prevent other people from feeling that pain” “I had to watch my friend dying because she was bleeding and I couldn’t do nothing” is always about preventing someone’s harm, because of empathy. Then you have Claire’s story, quoting This fucking excellent post by

@habaritess

“The graphic injury made her want to understand it. Let that sink in. The other kids were disturbed by the injury and, no doubt, also by the cries of the injured girl. Claire wasn’t. She was mentally disconnected from the scene because her empathy wasn't activated.”(...) She looks at people as a thing to analyze, and she does so in order to get what she wants from them"

I firmly believe this. Shout out to this post by @gingergofastboatsmojito talking about Claire being a benign narcissist. She has created a narrative about herself, and that's why she seems too eager to help people who cannot fend for themselves, people who are sad, lost, and hurt, because she feels her value in it. Heartbreak doesn't make it look cute. That's just another magic trick.

And the worst part, she may be a good doctor 80% of the time, but if you have this incident, there is the possibility that it has happened more than once. Like wtf, she said she was good at “taking care of sad drunk people,” but the moment she had a drunk patient, she actually was unable to provide good care for her. She actively made the situation worse. Her mistake could have been fatal. And she related the whole thing, mentioning how beautiful she was before her accident and how it was so amusing she laughed after because she couldn’t feel the pain. She told that shit like it was amusing. Idk, I have never heard a doctor talking like that.

And now we have a whole season of Carmy thinking Claire is the solution for his happiness, the missing piece, and whatnot. This is unnerving. He will run for her at full speed, call her in a time of need/crisis, and then what? Would Claire's interest/lack of empathy would be finally revealed? Will she steer Carmy in an ever worse direction?

[dctrfate]

hi. i made a uquizz. tell me what characters you like and i'll tell you what semi-obscure dc comics to read.

[spaciebabie]

"but spacie, i have no followers why should i reblog things" let me answer this question using myself, a person who has been using tumblr for almost a decade now, as an example. pre 2022 the most followers i ever had was like 125. most of them were dead blogs. killed in the porn ban or just people who had left for whatever reason. out of the people left who were still active, i had like 3 people at the most interact with my blog on a monthly basis. for years b4 this, i had ZERO FOLLOWERS but upon making my blog i saw all the other ppl who had been using this website longer than me talking abt how important it was ta reblog shit, and throughout all these years on tumblr, even when i had no followers i reblogged things. b/c i understood that it was integral ta the way this site functions.

now mind you, just b/c i had no followers didn't mean ppl wouldn't stop by and reblog things from my blog. every couple months id have a new person find me and reblog something. maybe they'd reblog a lot of stuff! the point is that id go months without any interaction at times and i STILL reblogged things because i knew people could find me and see something they liked on here. eventually people who frequently checked my blog ta see what i would reblog followed me!! im sure there’s ppl who dont follow me that ta this day who still reblog the stuff on here!! the point is that it genuinely doesnt matter how many followers you have. sure, it certainly helps, but ppl can still find and interact with the things on your blog without you having thousands or even hundreds of followers. so PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE reblog things.

[shannonsketches]

[spielzeugkaiser]

hi, first off i really love your art. the h/c and warmth really hit me where i live and your illustration style is fantastic. lately i've been obsessed with the post where an unwell milek thinks geralt will leave him behind. was that an ingrained insecurity, assuming his super-witcher dad wouldn't have time for a sickly human kid?

[MASTERPOST] - Ahh, thank you for the ask! Yes, this scene.. I actually saw this a bit differently! It's not about Milek fearing Geralt will leave him behind, he actually wants him to. They need to find his Pa!! I think he often feels like a burden; Jaskier knows this, but Geralt isn't aware of this yet. Milek just wants to pull his weight, especially with Jaskier. A little sneak peak to their struggles regarding this:

Meanwhile Jaskier continues to struggle with his omega status.

[mooblesandsoups]

I think what really upset me of being a c!Scott enjoyer on tumblr (the place known for c!Scott hate for some reason idk) isn't the hate itself (some people do gives valid criticisms. Many I also disagree with but valid nonetheless) it is the fact that I never see this type of criticism for any other life series character besides Scott. It's always "This is why Jimmy is so reckless in the life series" or "This is why The red king wasn't truly evil in 3rd life" but never any hate like the amount c!Scott gets. (Which is another issue but that's not relevant)

Come on tumblr it's not all black in white here!!

Let's talk about Jimmy's reckless behavior and how it does much more harm than good. Let's talk about Joel with his uncontrollable anger issues that only leads to the death of himself and others he cares about. LET'S TALK ABOUT PEARLS UNHEALTHY OBSESSIVE BEHAVIOR TOWARDS HER ALLIANCES!!

Let's really get in there and dissect all of these characters like they're pigs and frogs in a science class!

[belanor]

endless list of favorite characters - merlin (merlin)

"There is no evil in sorcery, only in the hearts of men."

[maskedbutsilly]

i miss tntduo so much can i just draw them for the rest of my life

they fill me with joy

[ladystoneboobs]

possibly incomplete list of asoiaf characters described as having red or even "ginger" hair (or red-gold as opposed to red-brown or ghiscari red-black), never auburn:

mycah, the butcher's boy*

beric dondarrion (red-gold hair)*

lharys, member of the three stooges men-at-arms (wild rust-colored hair)**

unnamed and unfortunate mother of robert baratheon's doomed youngest child, barra (light red-haired mother of black-haired baby)*

tomard aka "fat tom", stark guardsman (with his ginger whiskers)*

horas "horror" redwyne (orange hair)*

hobber "slobber" redwyne (orange hair)*

unnamed red-haired whore leaning out a window the day of ned's execution (presumably not the same as above since she was joking about the king's death)*

melisandre of asshai (deep burnished copper. red and terrible and red.)*

a man called jaqen h'ghar (red on one side, white on the other)*

pug-nosed dancy from chataya's brothel (described as red-haired by tyrion in acok but honey-blonde in asos, so presumably hair dye must have been involved between those book mentions.)**

addam marbrand (hair the same copper color as his horse's mane)*

"ginger-headed" maester frenken*

unnamed beardless ginger youth among theon's crew at winterfell*

ygritte, a spearwife "kissed-by-fire" (bright red)*

arryk aka "left" or "right", lady olenna's red-mustached guardsman*

erryk aka "left" or "right", lady olenna's other, identical, red-mustached guardsman*

lord paxter redwyne (tufts of orange hair)**

anguy the archer of the bwb*

a red-bearded karstark rapist dead in a crow cage at stoney sept*

tansy, innkeeper of the peach in stoney sept*

meryn trant (rust-red hair)*

"red" ronnet connington

mero, "the titan's bastard", former commander of the second sons (bushy red-gold beard)

a red-headed soldier who came with stannis to the wall

shadrich "the mad mouse" (bristly orange hair)*

lord rykker's red-mustached maester

marwyn belmore, lysa's former guard captain (ginger-headed)*

lord benedar belmore with a beard that was "a ginger-grey horror"*

lord orton merryweather (reddish-orange hair)

"the red oarsman", one of euron greyoy's followers (fiery red hair)

unnamed red-haired sailor arriving at port in braavos*

lord clement piper

and his son lewys "little lew" piper, who served as squire to jaime lannister in the riverlands

unnamed red-haired youth who first escaped northward with varamyr from the battle at the wall

one of illyrio's washerwomen (dull red hair)**

jon connington (once red hair gone to grey, still red at the roots and eyebrows even when the rest was dyed blue. also had a bright red beard as a younger man.)**

rolly "duck" duckfield (a shock of orange hair)**

a young man among the wildling refugees at mole's town whose red hair reminded jon of ygritte*

the "sunset kingdoms" girl raped by tyrion in the brothel where he was captured by jorah**

hagen's daughter, only other woman among asha greyjoy's crew

roggon rustbeard, one of asha's men

mully of the nw (greasy orange hair)*

bloodbeard, commander of the company of the cat (fiery red whiskers)

"ginger" jack, a toungeless sellsword of the windblown sent to dany, face nearly covered by his bristly, orange beard

gerrick kingsblood*

and his son*

and gerrick's daughter #1*

and gerrick's daughter #2*

and gerrick's daughter #3*

ronald storm, son of ronnet connington

one of the 7 "choicest" enslaved girls from the yunkish ship who were sacrificed by victarion (red-gold hair)

an enslaved redhead boy in line for a well, asking tyrion about dany**

nail, apprentice to hammer, the armorer for the second sons**

maester tybald, redhaired maester from the dreadfort serving arnolf karstark

valena toland, heiress to ghost hill (bright red hair)

teora toland, valena's younger sister with the same hair

uther shett, knight arriving for sweetrobin's tourney (ginger-haired and whiskered)*

*characters whose hair is described in the povs of starks (or jon snow) who only use the terms auburn or red-brown for catelyn, robb, sansa etc. and do not compare said characters to said tully-haired relations

**characters whose hair is described by tyrion lannister, who spent significant time with sansa and exclusively referred to her hair as auburn (without anyone else telling him her hair color as catelyn told brienne)

the only asoiaf characters ever described as having auburn hair:

catelyn tully stark

robb stark (red-brown/auburn tully hair "so like" his mother's, with a beard redder than his hair)

sansa stark (auburn hair lighter than her mother's, most reddish glowing in candlelight)

brandon "bran" stark (hair not bright red enough for him to distinguish himself from young benjen at first glance in a weirwood flashback)

rickon stark

brynden "the blackfish" tully (once auburn hair gone to grey)

edmure tully (auburn hair with a fiery beard, likely brighter than his hair like robb's)

lysa tully arryn baelish

known tully descendants never described as having auburn hair

arya stark (darker brown stark-colored hair)

hoster tully (hair and beard gone from brown to brown streaked with grey to white as snow)

robert "sweetrobin" arryn (fine brown hair, thought by sansa to be his best feature)

fun fact: the only other character that i can find to ever even be descibed as having red-brown hair in the main series is rowan, one of the spearwives who accompanied mance on his mission to winterfell. (described by theon, who had psychological reasons not to think of any hair-resemblance to robb and co.)

tl;dr i suppose my point here is that auburn hair in the real world may be a term thrown around wildly as a fancier way of saying red hair, but grrm and his westerosi creations seem to keep to a much more specific (true) definition. not just specific, almost entirely unique to a certain family, a weird mutation passing down their line somewhat inexplicably, like the magic platinum hair of the targaryens. (ned stark's 4 tully-haired kids being sorta like alicent hightower's 4 targ-haired kids where nobody can really explain why it was so dominant.) except it's actually more unique to the tullys than either black hair to the baratheons or silver hair to the targaryens, with the velaryons also having valyrian hair as well as some people in the essosi free cities too. which i guess makes rowan the wildling the equalivent of an unknown dragonseed or a lysene woman who could pass as a targ, and regular brown-haired hoster and sweetrobin the equivalent of regular blonde-haired alysanne and alyssa targaryen. so the next time someone calls the tullys lame or whatever, just remember that in-universe they're actually more special than the dragonriders, at least hairwise.

[la-pheacienne]

I just LOVE how both in got and hotd we have established that the root of all evil is women who *checks notes* enjoy sex! consistency is important right? I mean GOD FORBID we genuinely root for anyone that isn't nEd FuCKinG sTark the paragon of big dick masculine honor! who are we gonna root for? a flagrant philanderer that started the war because she's a whore? pwease

but at least they're criticizing monarchy you guyzzz hashtag anti war hashtag subversion!! definitely promising!! never been done before!!!

[triaelf9]

hey folks who interact with creative works online! just a tiny PSA

If you don't like a character, that's totally fine! If you have a different reading of a situation in a show & have issues with stuff that's going on, that's also fine.

What is NOT fine is to ACTIVELY SEEK OUT fans of the characters you don't like and talk shit about them, the characters they have feelings about, or the content they've posted b/c you, Freddy McHatesalot really needs to tell everyone how much you dislike a...fictional character.

You are totally welcome to consume content in your own space in whatever way you see fit. It is disrespectful of the fandom space to try to drag other people into your space and interact with you if they don't want to. And dunking on a character in writings or art of them is fucking rude as hell to the person who put work into into the creation they made out of some feelings they were having.

Also. side note, it is possible to enjoy a character who is Wrong About Some Things or Isn't Doing The Right Stuff In The Right Situation. Sometimes it's possible to like a character and disagree with them, and shitting on people b/c you can't see what they see in a character is pretty trash garbage and is 90% of why I just make silly little art for me and my own silly feels and hope folks get a chuckle or some enjoyment out of it too.