#but you know what. it'll last for long enough
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Exercise burns WAY too little calories to beat a bad diet, that is very true. I also lost the weight I lost (which his 20kg since summer 2023) through diet alone. Perhaps I did SOME exercise if you count the physical strength and steps you HAVE to do when you walk around in a warehouse, but I was "fat" back then even while working there before, so I don't think it made that much of a difference.
Ofc it's fine to stay happy and learn to love yourself as you are, I just know that I for myself couldn't and I find myself way more attractive now that I lost weight and for anyone who is like me and wants to shed some kgs without a horrible diet that ends in a yoyo- I'll add what I did under here, btw this is for no profit at all, I just want to help fellow people unhappy in their skin and I thought for WAY TOO LONG that losing weight is impossible, when it's actually not that hard.
It's annoying af, I know, but calories count. Get an app that calculates your daily need of calories. It needs your height, age and weight to know the right number. Once you have that, you can extract 100-300 kcal from that total and make this your goal to eat less of that every day for a few weeks, you'll see the weight WILL get down. The scale will sometimes stay the same weight for weeks though but if you keep going you WILL see the change!
Additional to step 1- 100-300 kcal we sometimes take in just with a sweet drink or a snack. It's not that hard to eat less of it and you can still get full! You can google low kcal meals that you can eat lots of- A personal tip from me is eating thin wraps (the thinner the less kcal) with salmon or other protein fillings- since protein makes you full AND is necessary for weight loss and muscle gain. BTW don't you dare to eat less than that, it WILL hinder your weight loss, we need a certain amount of calories to work!!!!!!
Protein, you have to eat enough protein a day for this all to be lasting. I read you have to eat your bodyweight (kg) in grams of protein in a day. For example, back when I was 60kg, I had to eat 60g protein a day. But also don't beat yourself up over it if you don't get that amount daily, I didn't either, just try to whenever you can, and it'll help!
ADD your workout. I had an app that also counted my steps and automatically added the kcal I burned to my daily kcal app. It motivated me to move more because 10k steps is like 100kcal and that was 100kcal I could eat more even WHILE dieting.
Cheat meals. Important: MEAL not day, every Saturday or Sunday I had a cheat meal, sometimes even smth as big as a burger on TOP of my usual daily intake. It helps your metabolism and body to stop thinking you're starving (which makes weight loss slower) so it's not only helpful in case you're starving to eat more (bc ngl it WILL be hard until your stomach has shrinked a lil but you can do it if I did bby) but also helps your diet physically fr! So do these!!! Reward yourself for your hard work
"So does that mean I will 4ever have to count calories?" God no, I did it for over a year until I was sick of it myself. I went from 68kg down to 49kg, when I stopped counting I gained again ofc, but I still know now what contains how many calories and know by heart what I can eat and what I shouldn't. I am 52kg for months now and I don't gain anything more and even if I would, I would know now how to lose it again if it gets really bad. THAT WAS BASICALLY already it. I know not every day will be easy and sometimes you WILL mess up. The trick is not to beat yourself up over it and keep going! Wearing the cute clothes you always wanted to wear will be SO rewarding and worth it, at least it was for me. Disclaimer that I never had children, don't have diabetes, and am in my early 30ies so idk if this will work for everyone but it did for me, and if this just helps one soul my job here is already done!!
Me: Exercise does not cause weight loss. This is a fact that has been demonstrated so robustly in research that even doctors, who hate and fear evidence, are grudgingly starting to admit this.
Someone reading that post: Cool, but have you considered that exercise leads to weight loss?
Me: I am going to eat you
#diet#weight#I was unhappy with my weigh from teen to end of my 20ies#And I wished someone would have told me sooner how to lose it FR#so I wanna share what I know#to everyone who wants to try it do your best!!!
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later, then | i. rin
✮ tags ; gn!reader, pre-relationship, tooth-rotting fluff, rin in his actor era, assisstant!reader. this is sfw but i am an 18+ blog so minors do not follow me lol.
✮ wc ; 1.4k
✮ a/n ; a comm for @rabbbitseason that i had to rewrite a couple of times. i rlly liked being able to write something like this. i hope u like the direction i ended up going in sdjksdj
✮ synopsis ; on his last day of filming rin tried to keep you out of his thoughts.
"Rin-kun,"
He knows your voice well enough to know it's you before he even opens his eyes. "Hn,"
"We'll be shooting your scenes next," You say, tapping his shoulder lightly. "They told me to wake you up."
It's not like Rin to fall asleep on a set somewhere, no matter how tired he is. He's usually the type to push through it no matter what. It's petty, but it feels like he's lost otherwise.
He was exhausted before hand though. Months of shooting and he still can't get used to his schedule.
He's here from a morning flight from France that he took all the way back home to Japan. After he arrived, he immediately hailed a cab and busted ass to get here on time. He would normally rest on his journey but found he couldn't bring himself to actually fall asleep.
Professor Heartbreak is a Japanese TV drama (airing domestically lived and internationally on Netflix) and Rin's first acting role. The series follows a romance between a graduate student caught in a lot of debt and her relationship to one of her pupils, college student and heir to mega corporation.
Rin has never had any interest in acting, and had even less interest in acting in a romance drama. His manager however urged (read: forced) him to take the offer, emphasizing how good it would be for his public image among other things. Of course, Rin still declined but no matter what he did - he couldn't actually seem to get out of doing it.
He's off-season now though he started filming during. He can say with confidence there's nothing he likes about the job. No matter how much his manager or director insists that all he needs is to have a pretty face - there's still a level of annoying obligation he feels towards doing it.
The reception was more positive then they were expecting. Apparently Rin is a half-decent actor. He's not playing a character he feels is so different from him, if not much more cringe.
Rin plays the love interest Yukio. Not very expressive and rich with a tendency to chase what he wants. Generally aggressive about the female love interest.
It doesn't suit him and he doubts he'll do it again. But a lot went into getting the role. If he's going to do it at all, he might as well do it well.
Rin hates shit that's half-assed after all, lukewarm acting doesn't suit him.
Today is the last day of shooting and happens to be one of the last scenes. Shooting is sometimes chronological, but not always. Regardless, after today it'll be the last time Rin steps foot on this set. No more long nights, or trying to memorize lines, no more out of place press runs. The practice season will start again and he can go back to the busy he's been used to since the debut of his soccer career.
That also means it'll be the last time you and Rin spend time in the same room. It's the first thing he thinks of when you wake him.
Rin sits up and carefully rubs his eye, careful not to disturb the makeup he wears for set.
"When the fuck did I sleep?"
You laugh under your breath, handing him a water bottle like you already knew he would want one. He takes it from you and takes a long drink trying to wake himself up.
"Been a little over an hour. Hour and a half, maybe. Did you sleep okay?"
He scowls, just slightly. "It was fine."
"I'm glad you slept well," You add, voice full of mirth and amusement as you read between the lines said all too easily.
He was moody when he came on set with you, worse then normal and refused to sleep. You suggested he rest his eyes and Rin scoffed at you for thinking he's so stupid. He's not a kid you can trick into going to sleepy.
You conceded easily, made a single sly comment about hoping he's all there when it's his turn. It'd be a shame if he had to keep shooting the same scene and ended up home late after all. Enough of a provocation to submit to your stupid suggestion.
Rin supposes this was why his manager hired you in the first place. You're in a temporary position, your contract to be in place until filming is over and Rin's back on normal scheduling. Rin realized pretty early on that you're more like a glorified babysitter then an assistant which is why he didn't have very pleasant expectations of you at the start.
But you're competent. Push without pushing too far. Clever even when it's annoying. You've known each other for a year and the only thing that binds you is work but you're with him all the time. Maybe it's just the job, but it still feels like you know him better then most.
Not like he cares.
Realizing he was tired enough to sleep and goading him into doing it are two separate things though. But you've managed both pretty easily which he can admit is a feat. You're always like that. You remind him a little of another annoying striker in that way.
A quiet settles between you. Rin gropes around for his phone, checking his messages and the time. Still a few hours until the set wraps and no doubt social obligations afterwards. He groans.
"I'm going home after we're done shooting,"
"You can't," You say, apologetic. "Manager says you have to show your face during the after party."
"That doesn't make any fucking sense."
"You're the main male love interest, you should at least drop in for a little bit. Have a beer, unwind."
"I don't like drinking,"
"A soda then. Don't be so stubborn."
Rin huffs, carefully pushing a hand through his hair careful not to mess up the styling. There's a beat of silence.
"Are you going?"
"To the drinking party?"
Rin looks at you as if to ask isn't it obvious. You just chuckle.
"Why?" You tease. "Will you stay longer if I go?"
Rin pauses. And it's quiet for just a second too long before he realizes. You seem to understand the implication almost instantly.
Even before Rin who catches himself just a second too late.
"...I don't mind staying with you until you've filled your quota. If that's what you're asking." You supply.
Rin frowns, faint warmth creeping his neck. "Then do that."
You fight back a smile. "Sure, sure. What time were you thinking of leaving?"
"As soon as possible," He says bluntly. You laugh that time. Brightly. Sincerely.
"Seems like a waste. You can handle fifteen minutes without me, right? Doesn't feel like I need to go if we're gonna part ways so soon anyhow."
Rin pouts. A petulant, ugly feeling in him. He speaks without thinking. "You're saying it like we're never gonna see each other again,"
You both catch it.
"Are we?" You're grinning at him where you stand next to him, eyes cast down to look at his face. He fights off a blush but fails to keep from turning red. Fuck. "Seeing each other again, I mean."
He doesn't know what it is exactly that makes him answer the way he does.. "No shit."
You grin, beam really - and your fingers brush his hand on the couch. Rin jolts, clearly in deeper than he thought.
"Okay. Then let's go together and get something to eat after," You say, coy. "Since we're seeing each other again,"
Rin rubs a hand on the nape of his neck.
"Shut up. Fine. Whatever,"
You laugh again no longer hiding it. He hands his water bottle to you as he gets called onto set. Standing to his feet, he takes a breather to stretch out all his limbs.
You give him a mischievous smile, staring at him openly when something seems to strike you. Like you've just realized something.
"Rin-kun. Bend down a little. I need to tell you something."
Confused but not concerned, he complies without thinking.
You place your copy of the script strategically to obscure both your faces, and in a single split second - Rin feels something soft and warm press against his cheek followed by another giggle like a bell chime. He flusters, instantly scowling and tomato-faced and nearly cussing as you look so self-satisfied.
(Warm. So warm where you linger on his skin. Hot where you've touched him despite how brief.)
"For good luck. I'll see you later then. Knock 'em dead, okay?"
He curses under his breath before they call him one more time and he watches you disappear to go do the other half of your job. He puts his hand to his cheek and takes a breath.
Stupid. He closes his eyes and buries the explosion of feeling in him as he replies to no one in particular.
"Idiot."
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Hi! I just found your story and I love it, so I was reading all the asks 🤣 for the "save MC or the world" I wanted to ask, if after years (a century? Enough that their mind is "stable") that the ROs saved the world, while on a trip they see MC alive in the "country side", what do they do? Do they think they are immagining things, do they try to find MC? If they decide to look for them and they meet MC, what would they do if they find out that MC doesn't recognize/remember them (MC almost died and lost their memories)? MC now lives a quiet life with the one who saved/healed them (not clear if they are romantically or platonically involved with each other, but they are very very close). Do they try to get MC remember them, do they try to restart all from the start, do they leave MC there and go back?
The mentioned scenario
Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying the story 💛
What a curious ask 👀
Vez knows it's you, but they want to make sure they're not mistaking someone else for you, so they'll come to talk to you. Upon realizing you don't remember them and figuring out you're not pretending, they hide their pain behind a smile and bid your goodbye. They'll arrange for someone to protect you, but they'll never go to you again, believing that they wasted all their chances with you when they sacrificed you. They don't deserve you, and you'll be better off finding happiness somewhere else. Better even if with someone else. If you ever has problems with something, they'll help you from the shadows, never revealing their involvement and identity. You still will be a part of their life, though you won't know about it.
Os doesn't believe it's you at first. Surely they're mistaken. They walk away, but the memory keeps pestering them, so they halt and run back to where they saw you. They don't know what to say to you, so they carefully observe you from afar before gathering courage to approach you. When they realize you don't remember them, they once again are thrown into utter confusion. Do they let you go? Do they try to remind you of them? But they sacrificed you. Would you want to be with them after all of that? They won't be able to decide at the moment, so they'll need time to think it over. Ultimately, they'll decide to let you go, but they last long. They want you in their life, in any way you can be, so they'll approach you again and try to befriend you. They won't let you come too close to them, however, because they don't want to hurt you again.
Laz thinks they're hallucinating, though they shouldn't. They're stable now. Which means you're real. Which is impossible. They follow you around, observing your behavior intently, like a hunter hunting its prey. They won't approach you at first—instead, they'll send someone to gather information about you. When they conclude it's really you, they'll come to you. It doesn't matter that you don't remember them. They'll crawl back into your life one way or another, no matter how much time it'll take. They know they shouldn't—you were hurt because of them—but they're too selfish to let you go. They won't pay much attention to your new friend; they're no threat to Laz or your relationship, and if they try to become one, well... :)
Ash cries. They break down right on the street, where they saw you. They're unwell, and they can't follow you because it's hard to breathe and their vision is darkening. Ash returns to the palace and tells everyone about this and asks Vez to send someone to find you, to gather information, because they don't know if it really was you or if they hallucinated. If it was you, then they'll come to find you, though they won't go alone—they're too scared. When they realize you don't remember them, they're shocked. They didn't think of this possibility at all. They thought you didn't want to come back to them, and if you said so, they would respect your decision, though it would break them all over again. But what do they do with this? They'll try to remind you of them and tell about your times together. If you allow them back into your life, they won't ask for much or try to get back with you. They'll let the nature take its course. As long as you're alive and happy and they can be near you, they're content.
(Let's pretend Az didn't go insane) Az comes right to you, asking you so many questions, babbling, barely making sense. I doubt you would understand them. Once you tell them you don't know them, they quieten, staring at you in surprise. They laugh, thinking you're joking with them, and say that this is a very cruel prank. When they realize you're not lying or joking, they take a step back and try to clear their thoughts. They'll calmly introduce themselves and explain that they knew you, and something bad happened, and they thought they lost you, but you're clearly alive, and they're very happy about it, and how have you been living so far? The barrage of words doesn't stop. Ultimately, they'll try to win you back, but they don't mind playing the long game and slowly gaining your trust. They did it once—they can do it again. They'll be very careful with your friend, try to get on their good side too, because they understand you might send them away if they offend your friend, and they won't allow that to happen. If your friend at any point shows romantic interest in you, well, Az knows how to play these games, and nothing will stop them from becoming the one you choose.
Thanks for the ask! The answer is kinda long, so sorry, lol... Hope you enjoy it 💛
#the abyssal song#asks#interactive fiction#interactive game#interactive novel#twine wip#tas: vez#tas: os#tas: laz#tas: ash#tas: az
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Imagine being Loki and Thor's sister, very sheltered and destined to one day be sent away from Asgard for a political marriage of some sort. They've both always been a little miffed about this arrangement, but they cope by taking all of your 'firsts' before you go.
18+ Dark Content. big brother!Loki, big brother!Thor. tw incest, creampie, dirty talk, spit roast. Cuckolding.
You grew up to be the most delicate flower the kingdom had ever seen, beautiful, kind, sheltered, and protected by the royal guard and your brothers until you were dependent upon them for everything.
They didn't mind.
Thor would stop mid feast if you needed him to read you a bedtime story, and Loki used every ounce of magic he had to make illusions that made you giggle and laugh.
But the threat of your marriage hung over all over heads like a death sentence. Especially once they learned you'd be leaving Asgard for good once you were married.
"Father, you must reconsider. How is she to exist outside these walls without us, married to a brute?" Thor argued to the AllFather while you slept soundly a few nights before you were to be sent off. Your new husband had made no effort to hide that he only saw you as a way to have heirs from a powerful bloodline.
"Their family has old blood Thor, old enough even our family recognizes it. It is a good allyship and that's final." Odin stared down his son ominously, and Thor felt his blood boil.
"If I may, Father, at least allow us to escort her to her new home. Give her some comfort at least." Loki spoke quickly, knowing if he didn't there would be another eye lost and not from his father's face.
Odin considered, for a moment before nodding tightly.
"But this is the last I am to here of this matter."
~
"I don't want to go. I want to stay with you. I wish I were marrying you and Loki instead." You wailed, fully sobbing as your brothers held you close after telling you what your father had said.
"Don't cry, little one. Please don't cry," Thor begged as he rocked you.
"It'll be alright sister, I have my magic. No one will keep us from you no matter how far apart." Loki tried to convince you but it just made you cry harder, clinging to his hand as Thor cradled you against his broad chest.
"No, b-because he'll own me. I'll be h-his and he'll get to make me b-bear his children..." Thor's jaw clenched and he looked to Loki quietly. It was easy enough for Loki to guess his brother's thoughts after hundreds of years, but for once Loki was in complete agreement.
"What if we put a child in your belly first?" Loki murmured as he brushed his thumb over your knuckles. For the first time since they'd told your about Odin's words your crying died down a little.
"Really? You'd do that for me?" You looked between the two of them with wide hopeful eyes, squeezing Loki's hand tight.
"Of course we would. Your ours, always have been and always will be." Thor's deep voice was gentle but completely serious. You wiped your tears, sitting up a bit taller.
"I'd much rather have your babies than his. I love you both, so very much." It was simply the truth, one the three of you all knew.
"Then let us show you how much we love you, sister."
~
The hours had blurred. What had started with gentle kisses and soft touched had long since devolved in hazy, animalistic sex.
"Another." Thor's massive hand slapped down on the fat of your ass, his cock pounding into your gushing insides relentlessly. Loki was groaning as you practiced deep throating him for the second time that night.
"Good technique. I think dear sister, fuck that's good, we've made you into a whore." Loki sounded pleased, Thor only growled in warning. They'd had this argument several times as the night wore on.
"Am I too lewd brother?" You'd asked when you'd demanded they teach you how to make them cum with your mouth so they could use you at the same time.
"Not at all, I quite like knowing you have some whorishness in you. Just needed to be nurtured." Loki purred as he kissed you, deeper than before. You heard a loud CRACK! and looked up to find Thor breaking the arm of the chair he'd been resting in.
"If that man touches you like we have I'm killing him. Allyship, war, all of it be damned. If he touches you I'm burning his kingdom to the ground." It wasn't a bellow like his normal good natured threats, this was quiet and deadly serious.
"Yes, yes. Only for us. Or Thor will kill your future husband." Loki laughed as he tugged on your hair forcing you down the last few inches until your nose was buried in his pubes. When you merely blinked up at him all pretty and wet eyed he barely got out a warning before he was coming down your throat.
You gasped for air when your brother released you. You'd lost count of how many loads you'd taken from them both, but each one made you feel greedier. You wanted to drown from the inside until you were marked irrevocably and their claim on you was undeniable.
"Breathe love, Thor give her space-" Loki combed your hair away from your face, trying to look in your eyes and check that you're okay.
"No!" You moaned as you fucked yourself back on your brother's girth shamelessly. "M-more, don't want to stop. Not till it t-takes. Please? Please please please," You begged shamelessly as Thor groaned and fucked you through his orgasm, each spurt squelching out around his cock onto the drenched sheets.
"Shh love, you know how Loki worries. We won't stop until you're with child. We promised didn't we?" Thor kissed your shoulder as he reached around to tease your clit, his fingers growing slick the more he played with your nub. "Because the only children you'll be having are ours."
"Even-"
"Even after you're married to that oaf, you'll still be good for us won't you?" Loki placed two fingers under your chin to make you look at him, your eyes glazed over and adoring.
"Yes."
#thor x reader#thor x you#thor smut#loki laufeyson#thor odinson#thor odison x reader#loki x reader#loki x you#loki smut#loki ☆#thor ☆#mina writes ☆#asks ☆#request ☆#tw dark content#dark ☆#tw incest#incest ☆#f!reader
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[Some personal musings on my fav vg romance]
Been thinking about this lately but I don't believe there'll ever be a more romantic pairing for me than Solavellan. It's the way they tug at your heartstrings and stir your emotions. The way they start off seemingly as two nobodies (maybe even outcasts) finding a connection during a tumultuous time but both become larger than life (in the narrative) and turn into a mythical, all encompassing love story.
There's pain, there's laughter, cute moments of flirtation and unexpectedly steamy kisses - all mixed in a tangled knot of truths and lies. Pining, heartbreak, visits in dreams, a language they come to share and communicate in harmony. It's the tragedy of not being enough, of self-denial and an unwillingness to share one's greatest burdens - until at the very last moment, after being released from their duties, their earthly shackles, it is enough. Their love begins anew with a lifelong, no an eternal promise and atonement. It's not the end, not really, not as long as the fandom continues to thrive - like it has for the past decade - and I believe it'll be a ship that continues to endure for quite some time.
Plus let's not forget it's a relationship where you can ask questions and receive insight (and approval!) about the world of Thedas, about topics no other character has really addressed before - or at least not in quite a meaningful manner. And although we later learn Solas has greater motivations, it felt like a relationship that was connected to DAI's narrative at each turn - from the way Solas repeatedly asks after the Inquisitor's wellbeing and driving motives to how he reacts to events throughout the story. How his reactions colour and give further meaning to what we know and thought we knew. How that carries on into the next game and recontextualises the events of the previous game, giving DAI even further replayability.
I like how Solas is one of the (few imo) characters where it felt like you could have a proper discussion, where he didn't have to have the final word (or at least not always lol), and he could admit when he was wrong. I like how differently one could flavour their relationship depending on their own Lavellan, but ultimately the ending is similar - it's heartbreak or righteous anger then a long long ten years of an agonising what if, what next?
Lastly, I really love how this codex entry comes to encompass them far better than the original intended duo:
Except in Solas and Lavellan's case the impressions don't fade. They linger, they endure, they remain.
#solavellan#datv spoilers#da spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age#idk I've been thinking too much about them lately and wanted to write my own feelings#so many of their in-game lines are romantic!!#gdl and alix wr really sold them as a pair#and ofc i have to thank weekes + the game testers that suggested solas as a romance in the 1st place#dai#da:v#lyna plays datv
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I'm so sorry if I'm clogging your inbox but I'm nothing but a hyperactive gal with chronic brain rot
Domestic Kate Laswell?
Domestic Kate Laswell who gets into not-so-quiet arguments with household appliances.
Domestic Kate Laswell who sits at the kitchen table and doomscrolls while her wife makes a recipe she saw on Instagram reels.
Domestic Kate Laswell in ratty lounge clothes with her hair pulled in a tangled ponytail, somehow holding a cat, book, and a bag of Lays.
I saw Kate Laswell and immediately knew what I had to do. Not apologising for this, I like Laswell posting so it's gonna be long. Also, when it comes to Station Chief Kate "I love my wife" Laswell, there is no clogging my inbox.
Kate Laswell, the esteemed woman she is routinely argues with their toaster because it's broken but she refuses to get a new one because it was the first ever appliance she bought herself. She and her wife have the money to purchase hundreds of new toasters but she refuses because this one is her toaster. Sarah Laswell has walked into their kitchen on multiple occasions to find Kate talking to this fucking toaster. "You under-toast the bread and then you over-toast the bread. Just toast my fucking bread correctly." "Let's get a new-" "No."
Kate, who has a Pinterest board full of recipes that she thinks Sarah might like to try and she'll send them to her wife only to find that it's the same recipe from the Instagram reel that Sarah had bookmarked last night. So, now she sits and watches videos about behind-the-scenes facts from movies while Sarah argues with herself about how much garlic is too much garlic.
Kate, who spends her day off on the couch with Minnie, their Maine Coon, on her lap with a book resting on Minnie's back and a bag of chips held between her chest and the cat. She's wearing sweatpants that are so old she can't identify what logo used to be on the leg. Her shirt is definitely Sarah's because there's green paint around the collar and it matches the green in the painting above their mantel.
Kate Laswell, who can routinely be heard threatening to put one of her cats in the soup. What soup, you ask? The soup.
Kate, who very `begrudgingly` agrees to let Sarah buy the cat Halloween costumes. And then days later sends John a series of photos. Minnie, their big, glorious, sophisticated girl, is dressed like a hotdog. Borris, her favourite grumpy old man, has a stupid Dracula cape. Dolly, has on a costume that makes her look like Yoda. And John's favourite of their cats, Dot, the little mold spore has tiny ladybug wings because they were the only thing small enough to fit her. Kate makes a photo of the four cats and Sarah her laptop wallpaper. John makes a photo of Dot in her tiny wings his phone wallpaper.
Kate Laswell, the professional woman who after having spent 26 hours awake sits and scrolls through Facebook one night on Sarah's phone. Except she doesn't actually look at any of the posts, she just sits scrolling with her thumb for ten minutes before she realises what she's been doing. Sarah waits until after she's tucked her wife in to lose it laughing in the other room.
Kate and her wife who parallel play on their phone. They'll sit on the couch with a movie they've seen countless times in the background while Kate plays solitaire and Sarah does her daily word search on her favourite app.
Kate, who does that thing I've noticed literally every woman do when they're on the phone at home and they start doodling in the corner of the nearest bit of paper. It starts as squiggles, then they draw black circles and eventually there are various little flowers scattered across the page.
Kate, who absolutely adores the movie 9 to 5 and will throw it on whenever everything in her job starts to become a bit too suffocating. Sarah recognises the action and immediately orders dinner from their local Thai place. The man who owns it knows the two by name, she doesn't have to order, she just has to call up and she hears "it'll be about half an hour" over the phone. More often than not on those days they'll fall asleep on the couch together like they did at the start of their relationship.
Kate and her wife, who like to make gingerbread cookies at Christmas and decorate them. Sarah is amazing at it when she's not giving the gingerbread ladies gumdrop titties. And then there's Kate, she tries, she genuinely does but every year a photo of her gingerbread folks gets sent to a group chat with her, Sarah, John and Nikolai where they are subsequently body-shamed beyond belief. She saves some for Nik anyway and he accepts them gratefully.
Kate and her beloved blue shirt that she wears to work and owns three of because the first one mysteriously disappeared. Coincidentally, Sarah started baking in the kitchen in nothing but a pale blue shirt and Batman underwear around the same time. Her second has a blood stain on the cuff from where John had grabbed her, not knowing his palm was sliced open and he'd stained the light material with blood. He had felt horrible, Kate brought up the time she'd drunkenly thrown up on a pair of his nice shoes years ago when they were younger and more reckless. They moved on. That shirt is now her "Sarah has roped me into helping paint" shirt. If anyone fucks up her last shirt then she's asking Nikolai, John and Sarah separately all to get her a new one for her birthday so she'll have a decent stock of them.
Sarah, who has to keep a stock of Dr Pepper and Mountain Dew in the fridge because Dr Pepper is her favourite and Mountain Dew is Kate's but the other woman would never admit it or buy it for herself because she's weirdly embarrassed by it. But amongst a very small group of people, it is common knowledge, Station Chief Kate Laswell's favourite drink is Mountain Dew.
And lastly:
Kate Laswell, the woman who once snapped a man's neck with his own gun, is also the woman who loves her wife's family. When they get asked to babysit baby Katie [named after Laswell], the two women agree before the question is even half out of the relative's mouth. In fact, you're right, they should keep baby Katie for the night just to give her parents a night off because they're kind like that. No other reason. And this little girl adores her aunts, if Kate is near then the toddler is by her side clinging to her pant leg.
So, they go shopping and get snacks. They also get baby Katie a new stuffed elephant because she really needed one and who were they to deprive her. Then they go home and change into their respective comfy clothes. Katie's is a little shark onesie and the two women take no less than 19 photos. They spend the day drawing pictures with little Katie, and eventually, it results in the toddler colouring in Sarah's tattoos and drawing Kate some of her own. Eventually, they order some takeout from their local Chinese place and watch Zootopia with their favourite niece. Hours later Sarah takes a photo of big Kate fast asleep on the couch with little Kate asleep on her chest. Kate has an arm around the little girl and the toddler has a fistful of her t-shirt. The next day they very reluctantly take their niece home but not without managing to persuade her parents to let them take her in two weeks time again.
#kate laswell#laswell cod#laswell mw2#laswells wife#call of duty laswell#kate laswells wife#captain john price#cod nikolai#nikprice#kate her wife and their cats are americas happiest family#i mightve went nuts just a little bit
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hello children
I am dubiously alive! I am potentially maybe a little bit returning to tumblr, because I have no fandom/language friends irl and it's actually quite exhausting!
what have I been doing?
interpreted in a martial arts academy in china. it did not end well :( and I spent the next six months processing, doing no chinese and generally feeling despondent
did some teaching in thailand with monks
went to india and saw my friend, got three yoga teaching qualifications, my partner flew over and we went to the himalayas together for a month
wrote 250k on my novel (too. long)
moved back to the uk
now I'm living with my partner very happily and I have started a new job teaching english! in my free time I work on my Book!
I have no idea who is still around of the 2020 quarantine langblr community, but if you are, say hi! I may pop in and out.
(re. sustainability and being online as someone who is fairly addicted to the internet - I am asking my partner to help by setting a daily timer, the password of which I do not know. I hope that will help me get the special interest buzz which I've been sorely craving, as well as enable me to, you know, have a life)
#I have forgotten entirely my tagging system. well#meichenxi...is alive??#and sort of vaguely studying chinese again?#I've found a good system which I'll talk more about later. it won't last#as nothing ever does#but you know what. it'll last for long enough#wow. tumblr lets you edit tags now???#I feel like I've been gnawing savagely at a chair leg and someone has gently suggested food
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if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.
#i cant let go of it. i cant even enjoy good moments without thinking about how they'll just be memories one day#how they're already memories since moments pass so fast#everything is I'll Miss This and i already miss it and i cant believe once you're gone you're gone forever#and ill never ever see you again. and your shell is in the ground but where did the rest of you go?#should i look at your body one last time? on one hand itll be the last time i see you.#on the other hand it will be the last time i see you.#and the memory of you will die with me too. as if neither ever existed#it impacts me so much too bc i dont feel close to anybody really...and i dont make friends easily#so whats going to happen when the people who have always been there arent there anymore?#im going to be alone for so much of my life.#i will record your voice so im ready for when i cant hear it from the source while also knowing it wont be enough and one day#ill be wishing it lasted longer. it could be 12 hours long and ill want more.#how do you surpass this? it hasn't even happened. when it happens i don't know what ill do. considering my whole life has been#the timer. the countdown. hours and hours of anticipatory grief#and then ill be next. me. some of all thats left of you. it cant be true.#sorry. this gets worse every single year and its been going insane lately#id surprisingly been managing it well for months somehow ! it wouldnt cross my mind...and now its there again#like it accumulated and its all coming out right now. ive been crying for hrs tonight and last night#one day his things will just be things. things ive made and given him will be in my hands again.#talkys#i want to go hug my dad but then ill just cry over how one day i wont be able to....! how do i store it? how do i save it?#how do i preserve it forever....even as i take my own last breath....#i cant believe im the only one of me. and my dad is the only one of him.#i wouldnt want to be reborn as anyone else. i cant believe one day i wont get to draw or eat or be comfy in bed anymore.#i cant take it !! im so scared. ill be scared until the end. and you wont be there to hold my hand. im going to be alone.#and none of those years of grief and joy and memories will matter.#i wonder if it would help to tell him about this. i need something to hold onto for when it happens. anything. but i also know it'll make i#hurt more; obviously. just another piece of him that'll be gone one day
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woag. vibeo game?
(very rough still)
(but now theres more colours)
#game dev#my art#murderhouse makeover#fuck it whatever im probably never gonna do the legal shit for this#slim chance i even make it to uploading on itch lmao#turns out game dev takes a REALLY long time when you dont know what you're doing#also i should not have waited this long to make the actual win state. how the hell am i gonna quantify decorating a house#since filming this video ive made the main menu buttons nicer and fixed the storage system#one of these days i'll actually put effort into the video#but also. i dunno#ive been telling myself id have enough to do a demo for the last two years now. im so tired and i keep not finishing shit#between making this and my full time job and also making regular ass drawings to put on this blog i kinda wanna throw the towel in#stop reading here if you dont wanna see my sad ass thought process#im not the kinda guy that gets Big Successes. like even if i finish and polish this fully it'll sell MAYBE a hundred copies#its kinda hard to keep going on this with that weighing on me yknow. like ive wasted months of work on this#this has been my free time for the past two years#i dont know#I DONT KNOW
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Y’all are being subjected to my Sims 2 tests, so there
The other set of Vargases came over for a visit and Scriabin picked up Shmee and started talking to Scriabin through him. Very normal, very usual
I downloaded some circle-glasses recolours and hghghh they look so good! Closer every day to his final details! Getting ever closer!
Edgar too! I made him a custom hair with a lighter undercut - I’m mostly happy with it, probably could’ve shifted it a shade closer to his skintone but the texturing was weird no matter what :P And his stripey shirt! I wish Body Shop didn’t have that hands-on-hips pose lol, it looks so much better in-game, but that’s all the better :)
I got some new clothes for Todd as well! As soon as I saw this ‘fit I was like “Oh that’s 100% Todd there he is.” Scriadad hug ♥ So cute
Foot-dancing together stopp it’s so cute!!
The way he looks at them stoppp <3 <3 They kept doing this right up til they left for home haha, Todd’s giggles are the cutest
Used SimPE to save him to the Body Shop, I now have infinite copies of The Boyyyy ♪
Moved him in with his “parents” as just shadow people basically, they’re not gonna matter in a bit as long as I remember how to get the Social Worker/Adoption process to work properly. Get her Todd!!
Wanna play? :D
Menacing :(
Look, Todd, your new dads are here! Initially I wasn’t sure who I wanted to adopt him, got lots of options; the first passes, the married couple with their own Todd, Johnny?? He definitely doesn’t have the facilities for a child lol But these are the ones that showed up on their own, so the married Vargases are the winners!
Scriabin cares more about him than his actual parents ;; A stranger off the street shows him more care! Not that it’s a high watermark
Look at him being a good dad!
Weh, he just wants friends ;; Poor baby
Best timeline, thank you
While we wait for CPS, let’s get some other interactions in! Nny is mean so he tended to prank the other two with a nose flick - mostly Edgar lol ♪ Now kiss
“Oh please don’t break all my bones~ :3” I love Todd looking up at them haha <3
Pffft, I think he was talking about the other Scriabin and just how attractive he is. Classic Scriabin. Alternatively, also funny to imagine him bragging himself up about how he’s just so handsome that Edgar can’t help but love him hahaha ♪
Allow me to tickle you with my KNIFE! >:D
Get a load of this guy lol
He ended up passing out at one point - I forgot which motives make CPS show up >.> - and completely 0%’d his comfort, but for some reason stargazing increased it?? It’s the same ground wh
Is two not enough to satisfy your butterfly bloodlust child?? He ended up with three, I had him release them before he was picked up by the Social Worker - success!
He rolled a new Want as soon as Todd was taken away - “Wants to see Ghost of Todd” Woah, dark! :0
And here he is on the married Vargases’ lot!! Success!! I did it right!! Heck yeah! :D Unfortunately they were uh, indisposed at the time. Good job guys pft
Goes right for Shmee, he really is Todd <3
#The Sims 2#My queue is too backlogged on main! And I /have/ been working on a lot of Vargas-specific Sims 2 retextures so it's fine lol#These are still tests - as said up top lol - so these events are ''non canon'' to what will eventually be my actual Vargas family#The beats will be similar tho! It's mostly just a lot of tweaking at this point to get everything just where I want before the domino falls#Edgar Nny and Todd are all so close to done - Scriabin still needs a bit more work lol of course he's the problem member ♪#It'll be worth it tho! >:3c Handsome lad <3#Did find out some interesting things with the Social Worker/Adoption process :0 Most importantly that adoption basically wipes everything#Wipes memories and family relations and changes the last name! So I'll have to go in with SimPE to change his name back once I'm there#I love SimPE haha ♪ I mean it's just an extension of how much I love TS2 but I just ughsjkhagf it's a good program!#It's extremely powerful and easy to get lost in if you don't know where to look but it's also incredibly user-friendly if you do know#Like - it's as easy as ''Open this sub-menu. Click this button. Rename this. You're all done'' it's just jdsflf Sims 2 my beloved <3 <3#I decided to cheat down the Casils' relationship with Todd before everything else - thus why his father is menacing him for the prank#I've seen Sims with not high enough friendship to not take a water balloon as a fun invitation but not between a parent and child!#It's subtle but the parent being mad and the kid cowering :( It's sadly appropriate for Todd#I stuck the Casils in a box to wait things out and they ended up glitching frozen in bed - they're effectively dead by Motive but can't move#So they can't die /or/ live - feels fitting#If you'd like to recreate CPS taking your child away without straight up torturing them! - Hunger. You just need hunger lol#Alternately you can also have them miss class if you'd prefer to feed them - both will result in being taken away after long enough#If I return to this save it's gonna be confusing since both Todds are identical and have the same names lol#I do have a bunch of new clothes! Second shopping trip :D#There's something oddly fitting for the Vargases to adopt twin/clones lol - fun shenaniganary until the Final Version comes to pass#Although now that I think of it I Could also give them a toddler!Todd hmmmmmm#It's an idea :)
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you ever met a guy so dumb and talentless he couldn't even cut himself right?
#well now you have bc you are following this tumblr blog and that guy is me#at least it gave me some edge and i might be able to fall asleep soon#bc tbh that was the goal here 🧐 bc my brain won't shut up#liveblogging my mental breakdown on tumblr dot com#self harm //#today has been really really bad. which is saying a lot bc i got to spend time with my friends and usually that's enough to make a day good#everything else was just THAT bad to make it not count#and a lot of what happened makes me wanna move out but when i start thinking of that i start spiraling bc i know i can't#and this puts me in this self hate loop again which makes my brain louder and everything even worse#so. now i can't sleep#I'm so tired. not just sleep tired. life tired. I'm lowkey considering taking a bunch of pills now in hopes i won't wake up#but h I'm too fat for that to do anything. it'll probably just give me a headache and fuck up my liver long term like the last time i tried#sigh. i hate being alive. not that I'd consider any of what i do living
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I know it's useless to get mad at the dog, she's just a hyperactive little thing who doesn't know how to behave yet. She's left home alone for at least 6 hours every day and she's bored, I can't blame her for tearing apart her training pads or shitting all over the place. Even if I did, she must have done it hours ago, dogs don't get that actions that happened so long ago have consequences and all me yelling at her will result in is her being scared of me. I know all that, I do
So WHY am I still so angry at her?? Why does it feel satisfying to lash out and see her scurry away??? She doesn't deserve to be treated like that, she doesn't know any better. And I don't know how to teach her to know better, I don't have the patience for it. She deserves better than me
#I just feel so.. impossibly helpless#here's this tiny creature that depends on me for eveything. that I asked for. that I wanted. and I can't even take care of her properly#I struggle cleaning up after myself. let alone a dog. and I really hate having to handle her shit#I know it's a matter of time. a matter of training#eventually I'll be able to take her on walks and all this won't be an issue anymore#but it is now and I cannot control how much it's pissing me off#if I wasn't alone it would be easier. but I am. so everything falls on me#I'm trying my best and it's just not enough#and my mom will be mad at me because I didn't walk her today even though I promised I would bc it's the last warm day we're supposed to have#but what am I supposed to do if she won't let me take her outside?? she's okay with her harness but the leash scares her#she just stands there hunched over and refuses to move. and cries#I can't force her. I don't want walks to be something she's scared of#but mom is annoyed that getting her used to being leashed takes so long. she insists that forcing her outside is the best course of action#and I can't even tell if she's right or not. I just want my honeybun to be happy and not scared#I feel like crying. I've been barely holding back for the last hour#it's just so so much#it'll pass and settle. I know it will. but I'm just exhausted#now I'll have to admit to everyone that I wasn't able to walk her again...#and that I don't know what to do with her#I don't regret asking for her. I really don't. I've wanted a dog for years#but maybe the timing of exam year + beginning of the colder months wasn't the greatest#and I started my period the day she arrived. so that.. just adds to the emotional instability#I'll get over it. I'll handle everything in time. I just.. wish I had someone to support me#or at least someone who wouldn't tell me 'well what did you expect? owning a dog is hard work. you can't just play all the time.#maybe you should have thought about that responsibility more' I KNOW. I HAVE. I JUST.. have my moments of frustration#that I wish I could express without everyone. including my own mind. telling me I'm a terrible pet owner#that's all#I adore my dog and I would never hurt her or subject her to any harm#but I'm also human and very mentally ill at that. I'm not perfect but I'm not bad. and she deserves better than that#but we're stuck with each other now. I could never give her up. I'm attached already. so... we'll make it work. one way or another. I swear
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genshin sugar daddies
premise: you have seven sugar daddies: one for every day of the week. a bit overwhelming, right? however, you somehow find ways to make time for each and every one of them, no matter how emotionally and physically demanding they are. it's just that, now they don't seem too keen on sharing, and you don't know what to do. (modern au)
tw: nsfw, dark content - minors dni
mondays are always harder in more ways than one. mondays are diluc's days, and that means that you're spending a good portion of your nights at angel's share.
on mondays, it's happy hour. which means that you're sitting at a booth in the corner looking pretty while diluc is tending to his customers. you're more than happy to sit back and relax while you wait for him to finish with work. when the drinks are on the house, you're willing to wait as long as it'll take.
periodically, when he's not busy, however, he'll walk over to you and engage in conversation. you act as a taste-tester for new drinks so he's always asking you if you like them. you two will talk about your day, any interesting events, and so on until diluc is pulled back into work again.
then you're back to fiddling your fingers and watching him work. over time, you've learned that he preferred that you not do anything while you were supposed to be with him. that instead, you fixated your gaze on him while he moved about. sometimes you'll catch him looking at you to see if your eyes are still on him.
even while he's dealing with a certain tone-deaf bard, there's something about the way he looks at you so intently that reminds you of a predator.
when angel's share closes, you're there to keep him company while he cleans up. when he's done, he'll sweep you away back to his manor.
you'll fall onto the sheets as he grinds against you. his shallow breaths brush against your throat. the look he gives you is nothing short of intense.
"everyone at the tavern was looking at you, you know," he mutters, running his fingers down your chest, sinking into your pants. he pulls them down effortlessly along with your panties. "didn't you feel it, darling? their filthy eyes on you. they want to ruin you. everyone wants to ruin you."
he throws your legs over his shoulders, his fingers crawling up your thighs. you jump when he suddenly inserts two fingers into your cunt, scissoring you. his free arm wraps around your leg to keep you locked against him. his eyes are glued onto you as he presses a kiss against your calf.
"but your eyes were on me all night, weren't they. couldn't take your eyes off me, could you. you're mine, dear. do you hear me? you're mine."
you don't overlook how tight his grip is. tight enough to make you wonder if he'll ever let you go. in the morning, he does, but you're scared for the day he wakes up and decides that it's for the last time.
tuesdays aren't as bad. when you’re sore from the night before, childe is there to take you out to meals, shopping, and sightseeing. he's not always available to spend time with you on tuesdays, because of his equally-demanding job and whatnot, but when he is free, he never wastes a second.
or a dollar.
childe smirks smugly from his sea. his posture is lax, one hand lazily tracing circles on the chair's arm while the other comes up to rest under his chin.
"how about you twirl for me, girlie? you look so beautiful."
you giggle, observing yourself in the mirror. "why thank you."
you bask in the way the soft satin kisses your skin. the way your newly-own earrings sparkle under the dressing room's light. just a couple years ago, you could've only dreamed of being dressed so prettily.
"do your side-bitches ever treat you as well as me?"
"childe!" you chide.
he laughs, getting up from his seat. but you both know better than to believe his little chuckle is genuine.
he approaches you, sliding his hands around your waist. tucking your head under his chin, he stares at you through the mirror's reflection.
you don't say anything, and childe doesn't either. it appears he's more than happy to enjoy just standing there. his gaze is glossed over, far away.
the two of you sway side to side for what seems like forever until he decides to say something.
"do they buy you pretty things like i do?"
of course they do, you think. although you spend one-on-one time with each and every one of them, they are all aware of each other. it's only right that they did. it was the first thing you said when you brought the idea up to them, that it wasn't going to be exclusive.
but when you see the way he looks at you, you can't really tell him the truth. not when his focus is redirected from his thoughts to you.
"the things you buy me are a special kind of pretty," you reply.
it seems like that answer is enough for him, because he doesn't say anything else. instead he hums quietly, letting the vibration ripple in the back of your head. he slides his hands down your hips and before you can say anything else, he whips his head around.
"i'll buy these sets." he motions over to the closest clothes rack to an attendant you hadn't noticed. "and that one. and the dress she's wearing. how many colors does this come in, by the way?"
the attendant doesn't hesitate. "five colors, sir. they come in bla—"
"great." he shuffles through his pocket to pull out a black card. "pack them up, we won't be here any longer," he retorts.
the attendant looks ecstatic, quickly shuffling out of the dressing rooms towards the cash register with newfound glee.
"childe," you whine. "i don't think these will fit in my closet."
his hands crawl lower, his finger hovering over your clit. "then they'll fit in mine. come over any time of the week when you want to wear one of my special pretty things."
your breath hitches as he rubs slow circles on your clit. he pushes the two of you back into the dressing room and closes the curtains.
"what are you doing, she'll be back any second—"
he kisses the corner of your jaw, pressing his lips close to your ear. "no worries. if there's one thing i'm sure about, it's that no one undresses you faster than i do."
wednesday is when usually everything calms down. kazuha will typically invite you to a new park, scenic route, or gallery. together, you'll write haikus, sonnets, and limericks together. some hours you'll just sit in silence, putting pen to paper. and when the sun goes down you'll exchange poetry.
out of the seven men, kazuha probably scares you the most. he was the first person you decided to do this whole ordeal with, after all. and since he's known you the longest, he also knows about your circumstances more than others. maybe that's why he's so focused on treating you as if you were a fragile cherry blossom petal. his touches feel like ghosts, running down your forearm as he presses a kiss to the apple of your cheek.
in exchange for his protection, his money, and his care, you give him honeyed words. you act as his muse for when he's hit a creative block. you're there to listen to him read out verses when the wind can't bear the strength to carry them. you listen to his grief about his best friend, his loneliness when he was forced to leave his home country. as someone many of the locals looked to for wisdom, he too carried the emotional burdens of being someone's rock. emotional burdens that he let onto you (whether purposefully or not, you're unsure). but you listen anyway, hearing him talk about days of poverty, where sometimes he had to worry about things to eat, or how to get proper healthcare.
you can't lie and say you're always stable enough to hear some of the things he has to say, but you try.
even if you sometimes feel like you can't take it, you just smile and squeeze his hand tighter like you're supposed to. sometimes your mind will go on autopilot, and sometimes you'll stand up on the grounds of needing to go to the bathroom. but at the end of the day, this is what you signed up for. this. making men happy so that you yourself won't have to worry about your endless debt.
you peer over your notebook to see kazuha immersed in his own writing. but instead of his usual peaceful expression, he looks somber. his hands won't leave the paper, his eyes glued onto the words that he's drawn onto the pages.
"what's got you so worked up?" you ask curiously. "is it something new?"
it's like your voice snaps him out of his trance. he blinks, looking up at you. there's a smile you know all too well on his lips. "yeah, i suppose you could call it that."
"could i look at it? i want to see what's got you so focused like that."
his lips press into a straight line. "hmmm, maybe later."
his words catch you off-guard. usually he's the one who's eager to share his work, regardless of the quality. "oh? is it something you want to keep secret?"
he doesn't many any hint of an answer. instead, he puts down his pen and stares at the ground in contemplation. he's picking and choosing what words to say.
"i could protect you," he says, shuffling his papers to the side. you turn to him, curious. his expression slowly hardens. "by myself, i mean. i could take care of you."
"kazu—"
"i have the means to make a living for the both of us. i could sell more of my poetry, i know they'll sell well—"
"where is this coming from?" you move closer to him, brushing his hair aside. "kazu, are you worried about something?"
there's something that's stopping him from saying anything. his fingers intertwine with yours, his thumb caressing the back of your hand.
he purses his lips, before turning away and sighing. "no, not really."
after that, he doesn't say anything else. the two of you bask in silence once again. even though you're used to the quiet, there's something deep down in you that feels nervous. like something in the atmosphere changed. there's a sudden resolved glint in his eye as he get backs to writing so diligently on a piece of paper he won't let you read.
after all these days spent talking about himself, somehow you're scared for the day he suddenly decides to stop.
on thursdays you're usually at tighnari's greenhouse, watching him take notes of other plants while you twiddle your thumbs. once in a while, he'll begin rambling about the plants—what kind of species they are, how rare, their medicinal properties, and the like.
you're more of a companion, than anything. someone who can make his days a little less lonelier. and you appreciate it. it's much more tranquil with him. you can enjoy his sharp quips, especially when cyno comes to visit.
his sex-drive is relatively normal, if not a little below average. just like wednesday, you also expect thursday to be a typical rest day.
except when spring comes.
when spring comes, your routine get a little wonky. for one week, at least. because that's when tighnari's heat hits him like a fucking monsoon.
you can already tell when it's coming when he begins to hover closer to you. whenever you take your hand out to do anything, even the slightest gesture, he's already taking it and dragging it towards his sensitive ears.
the moment you've made your plans set to 'take the week off' and help him out, he's already on you, face pressed into your neck as if it's his oasis.
as you can tell, he takes this week very seriously.
"i bet—shit—those other fucks don't get to hold you as long as i do," he lets out as he fucks into you like there's no tomorrow. his hands hold onto your waist like he owns it, pressing sloppy kisses down your spine. "looking so pretty for me. i wonder what they'd say if you got pregnant with my babies. you'd be so much more beautiful plump with my kids. is that what you want huh? to make them angry with my cum stuffed in your gorgeous pussy?"
some days you almost can't believe how uncharacteristically aggressive he is. he dicks you down like he's trying to imprint his shape into the core of your body so that none of the others can fit inside.
and when he cums, he'll take whatever unfortunate portions slip out and smear it all over your chest. especially where your heart is.
then the process starts all over again.
when it's over, he'll spoon you. as if he didn't almost fuck you to death. his touch is tender, like a ghost's hovering over your skin.
"why won't you leave them all for me?"
you shift a little to look at him and kiss him softy, sweetly, on the line of his jaw. "oh, nari, you know i can't."
his ears droop at your words. "you can't, or you won't."
his words make you freeze a bit.
you think back to last week, and the week before, and the one before that. you think about why you started selling your services in the first place, the endless debt you used to be in, and the progression of the relationship between all seven of your...contacts. even if you wanted to, you don't think you could back out if you tried. you've dug a hole for yourself. one deep enough to cause some sort of disruption if you ever decided to stop digging.
so you just hum. "you know how much i love routine."
as some sort of apology, you give him and open-mouthed kiss, one he's almost desperate to return. he moans, hands cupping your face to bring you closer to him.
you're well unaware how much your words have an impact him.
at the end of the week, all al-haitham wants to do is unwind. it's the only logical thing to do. no late-night drinks with the colleagues, no stressful trips to some tourist trap. on fridays, al-haitham comes home to a meal made with love.
when al-haitham's at work during the day, you're usually running your actual errands. it's when you have time to make those one-in-a-blue-moon visits to your actual home, although it's getting harder to call it that.
when it gets to the late-afternoon, you'll usually head to al-haitham's place to start cooking. if you didn't know how to cook before, you do now. every ingredient is handled with care, measured meticulously just as you knew he preferred.
and when he gets home, tired and stressed out, you're there to welcome him with a chaste kiss on the cheek.
during dinner, sometimes he'll talk to you about work or the latest research he'd gotten himself immersed with. in return, you tell him about some of your childhood memories. your likes, your dislikes, what used to be your hobbies. you do your best to keep your personal matters out of the conversation, no matter how many times he tries to pry into your private life.
sometimes dinners feel like a full on investigation, the way he keeps greeding for more information about you. he watches you eat with calculating eyes. you pretend to pay no mind to it.
in the beginning, kaveh used to join you for dinners. you always liked the guy, the way he bickered with al-haitham and riled him up. but now you've begun to see less of him, as if he never comes home on fridays at all.
after dinner, there are two different outcomes depending on his mood:
outcome one is that you'll spend the rest of the night curling up on his couch, the both of you immersed in your own books. al-haitham leans on your shoulder as he flips through the pages as if they're nothing. you can't help but feel ticklish whenever his hair brushes against your jaw.
somewhere in the middle, he'll move one hand to start fidgeting with the end of your shirt, sometimes crawling underneath to caress your sides.
outcome two is less quiet. the moment he gets home with that solemn face, you know it's coming. his voice is huskier, his responses shorter. it's usually a result of an impending deadline, colleagues being more peskier than usual.
the moment you two are done with dishes, he gingerly takes your hand and leads you up to the bedroom.
his kisses tastes like green tea and dinner. his hands run up and down your torso, trying to imprint the feel of your skin into every inch of your brain. you whimper when his thumbs press softly into your nipples, rolling them around as they harden.
your hands find purchase on his collar, tugging him impossibly close. he groans at the contact.
you let out a yelp when your back suddenly falls onto the bed. your hands are pressed onto the sheets, al-haitham's fingers encircling your wrists. his knee nudges your legs further apart, rubbing at your clit.
"don't look at the ceiling, dear, look at me," he breathes out, his hands leaving your nipples to gently guide your face towards. "that's it. good girl. just me. just look at me. only me."
he smiles.
"now, let me do god's work on your divine body."
saturdays with ayato can sometimes get hectic. some saturdays you're out getting bubble tea together and enjoying the city, and other saturdays you're hurrying to some publicitiy event hosted by the kamisato clan.
on those type of days, you can expect to wear gowns layered with shiny nylon tulle fabric. it's not as revealing as what you'd try on in dressing rooms with childe. in fact, it's a bit more modest.
today you're wearing a light-blue gown to match with ayato. you turn around to get a good look at the cute bow attached at your waist, your diamond encrusted earrings swaying along with you.
it's as if you've put on another costume. another front to wear for the night.
ayato enters the room just shortly after. in his hands is a diamond necklace to match with your stunning earrings. small smile falls upon his lips when he clasps it on.
"you're beautiful," he mumbles. you giggle when he kisses you square on the lips, licking away the tinted color.
"ayato," you press in-between kisses. you place a hand on his chest to gently push him away. "you're going to ruin my lipstick."
he pulls away with a cheeky smile, taking your wrists to wrap around his neck. "you can always put on some more later."
you pout but kiss him regardless. he tightens his hold on you in reaction, moaning into your mouth.
at these kinds of events, you're there as his plus-one. just so that other officials could stop introducing girls to him when he clearly wasn't interested in them. it'd be arguable to say that you might even be there to make the events a little less intolerable.
somewhere along the lines, you'd sleep with him in addition to being his arm candy at parties. sometimes even before: you two rushing to put on your formal attires and fix your hair minutes before the event started.
but beyond that, you started to get to know him better. he'd whisper into your ear about funny stories relating to the guests as you meet them. sometimes you'd run away in the middle of the party to binge out on the food and talk about your other interests. surprisingly, he doesn't talk about the politics behind his duties as the head of the kamisato family. not as much as you expected, at least.
instead he talks about his dreams for a family. how many kids, what their names would be, how he'd raise them. and as he talked, he'd give you this heavy gaze that you're not sure what to do with. as if he was expecting something from you.
you're beginning to believe that ayato has somehow confused contractual girlfriend with actual girlfriend.
when you had met ayaka months ago, ayato introduced you as his girlfriend. you didn't attempt to correct him—that's ayato's business. not your's. but when you're expecting ayato to come clean to his dearest sister, you're sorely mistaken.
instead, while he kisses your lips so hungrily, he subtly slips a diamond ring onto your finger.
sundays are usually kaeya's days off. although the cavalry captain's duties are seemingly never endless, he takes the day off to take a breather.
in other words, he sees you.
at first, it was just candlelit dinners. he'd walk in with a bouquet of roses, complimenting your dress and staring at you as if he was undressing you with his eyes. he'd take you to somewhere fancy, pull out the chair for you and sweet-talk you all through the night.
conversations were fun with him. you didn't have to think much at all, not about how to pay the bills, the six men in your life who seemingly began to want yours to only revolve around theirs, or being someone your not.
kaeya was probably the only one who you felt you could be comfortable with. he made you laugh, he'd tell all sorts of interesting stories, and he never made the silence feel awkward.
at least, that's how you used to be.
you see, usually after these candlelit dinners you'd both go back to his place, with him ripping off your clothes the moment the door closed. but as of recently, he's been asking to come over to your place instead more often. almost too often.
and that's not the only thing that's changed.
the sex used to be rough. heated. almost as if he was consumed by all of his pent-up sexual frustration and was only focused on getting off. he'd slurp your cunt like a man starved but he'd still rail you as if that's the only thing he cared about.
but as time passed, he's been getting more and more...sensual. the sex is much more slower. personal, almost.
vulnerable.
after dinner, he slowly slips off your clothing. one article after another, until your left in your underwear. he first kisses you on the mouth, then your neck, then your chest, then your stomach. slowly, he makes a trail of them down your body, as if no skin deserved to be left untouched.
although you made a rule that no one could leave your marks on you, it doesn't mean he doesn't try. as he kisses your lower lips, sometimes he'll attempt to leave marks close to your clit. if you're not careful, diluc will find it tomorrow.
his thrusts were always deep, but now that he's much more purposeful about it. it's rhythmic, as if he's trying to reach a new spot inside you. somewhere no one's touched.
the pillow-talks are much more longer as well. he holds you tighter now, wrapping his arms around your hips as he tangles his legs with yours.
instead of ranting on about the silly incidents he witnessed on the job earlier in the week, he talks about his feelings. towards you. towards diluc. towards himself. some nights you can handle it, some nights are too much.
but you can't say anything. not when he's holding onto you like you’re his lifeline. not when he helps you pay off your debt. and so you let his raspy voice whisper in your ear as he combs his fingers through your hair. you listen to him mumble sweet-nothings.
you're not sure if you like the adoring look he gives you as you drift off to sleep.
#genshin x reader#diluc x reader#childe x reader#tartaglia x reader#kazuha x reader#ayato x reader#alhaitham x reader#al haitam x reader#tighnari x reader#kaeya x reader#kaeya smut#genshin smut#yandere x reader#yanderes x reader#yandere imagines#tw yandere#male yandere#male yandere x reader#manipulation#tw power dynamics#fem reader#bro the way i've been lowk procrastinating on this#reverse harem x reader#yandere reverse harem#minors dni#jojo writes nsfw/dark content
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Bear boyfriend Toji who dreads getting sick more than the average person. He gets so grumpy during this little stunt in his health because he can't do much besides manage his harsh cough and runny nose, rest in bed and eat, but that's not even what he's most upset about. He's so pissed off that he can't be around you, unless he wants to get you sick too.
Oh, but you make it so hard on him. Walking into the room with a mug of tea with that smile that could nurse anyone back to health. You linger for longer than you should, even after he told you that if you're in there for too long, you'll get sick too. It's an annoying dilemma because on one end, watching you be sick is one of the most heart wrenching things he's ever seen. Like him, you pretend that you're fine, when really you feel so debilitated by the virus that invaded your immune system. You tell him you feel better, but your hearing is muffled and your voice is gravelly and doesn't seem to be recovering quickly. Toji sees right through it and his protective instincts kick in. He insists on doing everything necessary to get you back up and running. On the other end, he wants to see you and kiss you and just hold onto you through this horrible time he's having. He hasn't kissed you in almost three days. It really sucks that he's sick, but it's entirely unfair that you can't be near him. There is truly so much for him to be reasonably grumpy about.
"Hey, you're gonna get wrinkles on your handsome face," you say, smoothing down the crease between his eyebrows with your thumb. "Do you really want me out of here that bad?"
He sighs. Your cool hands are heaven on his burning skin. "You know I don't, ma," he croaks out, pulling your hand down from his face and holding it. "I want you here, but you can't stay."
"Baby, you lost your pretty color. You look like a zombie, but also, it's killing me to only be allowed to check on you once every hour. I think it's time I come sleep in here, again."
"No," he protests, while shaking his head. He wishes he had rethought the gesture once he's steady again. He feels like he shook his brain and his head hurts, now.
"Toji, i'm taking care of you. I'm sleeping in our bed, tonight. I'm more worried about you than I am about getting sick."
He wants to laugh at how you sound like a mother scolding her child, but he knows it'll throw him into a nasty coughing fit. He can't argue with you too much in this state. He doesn't want to argue anyway. You care and it feels nice.
"If I get sick, I get sick," you say, settling down next to him, on your side of the bed.
Toji has never been one to pull the 'woe is me' card, but when you're smothering him with so much affection and cooing at him while caressing his uncomfortably warm face, it's hard not to lean into it. You relieve his discomfort with your methods of care. Be it medicinal remedies or your extra love and affection, even your patience. You weren't the one who proposed keeping distance from him. You didn't want to sleep on the couch those last couple nights, but you did it for the sake of letting Toji be comfortable. He's your lover and you don't see a reason to avoid him, like what he has is something more fatal. His contagiousness is disregarded, because it doesn't matter.
You know he would do the same for you so you don't wrinkle your nose when he starts feeling safe enough to nuzzle into you and sluggishly kiss you, while clinging onto you. He's extra clingy, too. Your body is a lot cooler than his, so it feels nice when he rests his cheek on your chest or when his hot, clammy hands go to your arms. You don't turn away or block your face when he coughs. You rub menthol onto his reddened chest and neck, and watch as he grins dumbly when his nose clears up for a little. When he falls asleep, you stay with him, even if he doesn't wake up for the next five hours. You watch over him and only get up to grab things that are necessary, like his medicine, some water, and a damp towel to wipe the sweat off his forehead and neck.
He takes on the role of the little spoon when you take care of him. Being pampered by you makes him feel small in all the best ways. He feels protected, like you're his guardian. It's really as if the only remedy he needs is you. The expanse of your love for him is unquantifiable, but when you wrap your smaller arms around him and press featherlight kisses onto his skin, it's like a force field that blankets him.
#toji#fushiguro toji#jjk toji#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen toji#jujutsu toji#toji fushiguro#toji fushiguro x reader#toji x reader#toji x y/n#fushiguro toji x reader#toji x you#toji fluff#toji fushiguro x you#jjk fushiguro#jjk x y/n#jjk drabbles#jjk scenarios#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen scenarios
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Peter places an envelope on Tony's desk.
Tony looks up confused, "huh? What's that for?"
"It's for you," he points awkwardly at the plain blue envelope, held closed with a Darth Vader sticker.
"It's not my birthday kid." He snaps the protective face shield back down as he picks up his soldering iron, sparks flying as he gets back to work.
"I know that I, uh. It's from, it's for. It's yours. I gotta go, see you later Mr. Stark!" Peter hikes his backpack up tighter as he skips out of the lab.
Tony grunts in acknowledgement without looking up, eyes focused on the searing metal in front of him.
* * *
"Tony? I thought you were gonna have dinner with me after Peter left," Pepper saunters down into the workspace in a flattering pair of jeans and baby blue blouse.
"I was. I am. He left like five minutes ago," Tony waves at her without taking his eyes from the computer he's typing on.
"Happy drove him home two hours ago. Come, have a nice sit down meal with me." Pepper wraps her arms around his shoulders from behind, kissing the top of his head.
"I can have a sit down meal. I'm sitting right now, bring the carbonara down here and it'll be a proper date," Tony replies.
"Yeah, you me and your computer. How romantic. Tony, come upstairs- what's this?"
Tony glances up to see her holding a blue envelope.
"Uh, it's the kids."
Pepper flips it around, "it says To Mr. Stark From Peter on the back."
Tony just shrugs and goes back to typing on his computer.
The delicate glue of the sticker is undone under Pepper's sharp nails as she opens up the envelope and pulls something from inside.
"It's illegal to open someone else's mail y'know," Tony teases.
"Tony this- god you are such an asshole!" Pepper smacks Tony on the back of the head with the envelope.
"Ow! What the- what did I do now! I was just joking about the carbonara thing... mostly."
Tony finally meets Pepper's eyes of scorn. She tosses something in front of him with a huff.
"Tony, he even used a Darth Vader sticker. Do you know how adorably geeky and topical that is? You have got to start paying more attention to the living breathing people in front of you instead of your machines. Dinner is ready, please come upstairs."
Tony watches her leave as the clack of her heels fade away with every step. He's not sure what Darth Vader has to do with missing dinner, but he's quick to get up and start to follow.
He pauses before he makes it out the door, turning to finish the last line of code before he forgets the function. He pushes something off of his keyboard to type and press save.
Tony can't remember the last time he looked up from his work long enough to consume solid food. He's so ready to carb-load with some Italian food, turning away from the computer and blue envelope.
Tony's eyebrows furrow. Hm. Darth Vader sticker.
Tony turns back around and picks up the envelope from beside his keyboard.
This must be what the kid was yapping about earlier. Tony sticks his hand inside and finds a card, pulling it out.
"Father's Day it is," the front says in bold lettering with a picture of Yoda crudely hand-drawn with a sharpie and green highlighter. Tony flips it open, "celebrate you we must" is written in the middle of the page.
Below is a message in smaller writing; "Thank you for everything Mr. Stark, we wouldn't be here without you!" with a blob of sharpie that looks suspiciously like it's scribbled out a small heart, then signed "From Peter, Dum-E and U" each name written in their own unique handwriting.
"Friday, what day is it?"
"It is Sunday June 16th, also celebrated as Father's Day in countries such as the United States, Canada, and the UK."
Hm.
Tony stands there and stares at the card for longer than he'd ever admit before looking up at Dum-E.
"You help with this?" he asks, pointing at the card.
Dum-E chirps happily, twirling his claw around.
"Your hand writing's terrible."
* * *
Peter enters the lab slowly, an unsureness to him that's out of character.
It's Wednesday, his usual day for coming over to Tony's workshop. He hasn't heard anything from Tony since Sunday, not that he usually does. Still, the quietness has unnerved him. He's not sure what he was even expecting from his mentor; silence is probably the nicest response he could hope for after embarrassing himself like that.
"Hi Mr. Stark," he greets once he spots the older man sitting next to a complicated tangle of wires.
"Hey kid, can you go to the computer and run the command I have open for me?"
"Sure thing!" Peter says as he dumps his backpack onto the floor and jogs over.
The two get into an easy rhythm and Peter's practically forgotten why he was nervous in the first place when, "hey grab us some sodas will you," Mr. Stark asks him.
Peter walks up to the fridge in the corner of the room when he notices something new.
In the center of the silver metal lies a single piece of paper, stuck to the refrigerator with a plain magnet seemingly scrapped from some old hardware in the lab.
Tony has his Father's Day card displayed like some dorky parent whose kid got a half-decent report card, showcased on a fridge like a toddler's finger painted masterpiece.
It makes Peter so happy he can't wipe the stupid grin off his face the entire time he's grabbing sodas and delivering one to Tony.
The older hums a thanks without looking away from his project, but as Peter turns away Tony's own face contorts into a pleased smile all of his own.
The two share identical smiles all afternoon, hidden behind soda cans and computer screens.
#happy father's day#irondad and spiderson#peter parker#tony stark#marvel mcu#iron dad#irondad#they're a family ur honour!#btw peter got flowers for both May and Pepper on mothers day because hes a gentleman <3#spider man#iron man
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canon gojo will love you in ways unfathomable and never tell you. will pretend he barely knows who you are. in death and in life, he'll will himself to not think of you and love you obsessively anyway all while you barely know. this is all to keep you safe. he doesn't expect your loyalty or your patience or your time. he'll drop into your life and wash your back and leave without word. he'll come find you. he loves you more than he has loved anyone in a very long time. but this is a secret even to himself, because the second he believes in it - he knows it'll kill you. he isn't sure in what way, only that it will and that is has since the last time he has allowed himself to love anyone at all
sometimes, you will look at gojo with affection warm enough that he wants for something he has never been allowed to have and barely knows. sometimes, you are loyal to him and he wishes you werent. at least when you hate him, the burden of love rests only on his shoulders. and he can love you from afar with false friovlity and absence without it burdening your life.
gojo hopes always, secretly, that you'll get sick of him. that you'll exhaust yourself and leave first. that he wont be forced to turn away before he wants things to end. he hates having to do it, even after only having done it once.
gojo loves you. he will never tell you. he hopes you never know. he hopes you never find out that this is his version of mercy
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