#but you can’t keep writing these characters doing the most horrendous shit then turn around and redeem them
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ndplatypus · 1 year ago
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Y’all I don’t like how they are writing Viren these last couple seasons. Like he did it all for his family? He wouldn’t sacrifice his children? It wasn’t for power? Trying to make him sympathetic by showing he started using dark magic to save Soren?
Like I’ll be honest. If these two last seasons were to another series, I’d get it. I’d sympathize with him. I’d think this was genuinely good writing.
But we watched this man for the first 3 seasons not show an ounce of care for Soren, outright saying between him and Zym’s egg to chose the egg. He manipulated his son into attempting to murder two children then gaslit him to make him feel like he was just stupid and misunderstood his fathers orders. Manipulating his own daughter against her brother to be on his side.
I watched this man, gleefully, torture, manipulate, and attempt fucking genocide. You can’t show a man grinning and getting off on torture and power then have him act like he knew he was doing vile things and regretted and hating doing them. That doesn’t work like that.
He was ready to turn his son into a mindless lava beast to lead a war that would kill thousands if not fucking millions.
These last two seasons of Viren would be great… if I hadn’t watched the Viren of the first three seasons.
Like I’m calling bullshit I’m sorry.
I pray they aren’t going a route of saying it wasn’t actually Viren but the dark magic corrupting him. That they aren’t pulling a “well being reborn made him pure and untouched by dark magic so this is actually who he is and he’s a good man and this is who he would be actually if he never used dark magic!”
I will literally vomit. Stop having characters commit atrocities including ATTEMPTING GENOCIDE and try to redeem them or write it in a way that puts the blame elsewhere.
Just because Aaravos is the real big bad, doesn’t mean Viren isn’t also disgustingly evil. I swear to god if they try to redeem him I’m gonna be mad.
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secret-diary-of-an-fa · 1 year ago
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Doctor Who: Wild Blue Yonder Review
Quick question, Russel T. Davies: where the fuck did THIS come from? I only ask because this is a genuinely brilliant, exciting, well-written episode of Doctor Who that feels like the best of your original run, whereas- no offence- The Star Beast was a confused, underwhelming mess. Seriously, if I was a teacher who had to grade both pieces of work, I’d assume you’d gotten illegal help with one of them. I mean, seriously Russ: what did you do between writing Exhibit A (the mess) and Exhibit B (the fucking masterpiece)? Did you just neck a fuckload of hallucinogens? Did you finally get laid? Did you allow yourself to be beaten over the head with a big, rubber hammer? Whatever it was that made the difference, please, please keep doing it.
And now to address my actual readers: Wild Blue Yonder is very, very good and I recommend you watch it with a fucking colostomy bag in, because it is shit-yourself scary. The Doctor and Donna get stranded on a spaceship at the literal edge of the universe (she spilled some tea on the TARDIS console, because of course she fucking did) and there are things aboard from the darkness beyond that edge. Lacking shape or form or mass- being entities of pure, malignant consciousness in fact- they assume the forms of Donna and the Doctor and proceed, forthwith, to fuck with them in the most unsettling and horrific manner possible. It’s creepy as fuck to see the copied bodies of our leads distort and warp in horrendous, Kronenberg-ish ways as the entities from the dark beyond existence seek to elicit their fear, but the real-headfuck comes from their refusal to give up the pretence, remaining in-character even while waxing loquacious on their evil plans (which I won’t spoil). There’s an element of psychological warfare- even torture- at play here, as they gradually tease out bits of buried darkness and it’s deeply, deeply affecting. It’s strikes a delicate balance, being the kind of thing that you can get away with on prime-time TV without pulling its punches one fucking iota.
Of course, this being a Doctor Who episode, the horror is tempered with humour and quite a bit of silliness. There’s a line about how someone “Got a very old robot out of storage to walk, very slowly, down a very long corridor” that, in context is giggle-worthy (particularly with the additional knowledge that the Doctor has named the robot ‘Jimbo’) and a bit where the leads meet Isaac Newton and then discuss how hot was (with the Doctor being surprised to realise that recent experiences have turned him just a tiny bit gay).
The Doctor also gets to be the Doctor in this episode- running around, solving mysteries and finding ways to fight monsters. Not fucking victims of a ‘psychedelic sun’ or insect blokes who eventually turn out to be good guys: actual, no-holes-barred, proper Doctor Who monsters! I won’t spoil the solution he eventually hits on, but it’s bombastic and clever and entertaining in a way that literally nothing in The Star Beast was.
Oh, and no spoilers, but the final scene nearly made me cry. In a good way.
Obviously, I have gripes. Well, one gripe. Namely: Sir Isaac ‘Mr. Gravity’, Fuck You Newton was not a mixed-race individual and while colour-blind casting is fine (great, actually) for fictional characters, you can’t just race-swap actual people who actually lived and had identities of their own. The past isn’t just a big dustbin of fun characters and events to be pilfered for content: it’s a series of lives and experiences lived by real, sentient people who, if they had any say in the matter, would probably like to be accurately represented after their deaths. Even in an upbeat work of fiction, the past ought to be treated with a modicum of tact and delicacy; its tropes and ways of being preserved with all their flaws rather than suborned to suit modern audiences. Irreverence is fine: wild inaccuracy isn’t. I’d also like to point out that, if they wanted a non-white physicist in the episode, there are fucking loads of real ones who just aren’t taught in the Western scientific canon. This could have been a good time to introduce wider audiences to, say, Robert Bragg or Arthur B.C. Walker, Jr (who is the only reason we today can observe the sun’s corona accurately enough to get a sense of what it’s fucking doing, by the way). I mean, surely drawing attention to real non-white scientists is much more meaningful than pretending a dude with skin like fucking Savlon wasn’t Caucasian. It’s less attention-grabbing, of course, and it doesn’t virtue-signal as hard, but it’s more meaningfully progressive and actually serves to enlighten and inform viewers.
Okay, that’s out my system now. I would like to stress that I’ve only devoted so much time to that because it’s important to clarify where my objection comes from, lest some cretin completely miss the point and set up a chant of ‘bigot’ (probably misspelled as bigfoot because of the autocorrect on their cunting smartphone) right outside my blog. I often find that the people who object to these false representations publicly are just bigots because decent, progressive people are too bloody scared to point out the real flaws. It’s therefore important, as a progressive, anti-racist person, to raise objections that are actually sane, lest our entire cultural debate descend into a slap-fight between hateful, ill-read fascist micrococks and sanctimonious, reality-denying nutbars. All that being said, not-really-Isaac-Newton is only in Wild Blue Yonder for, like, three minutes, so in terms of the episode itself, it really is a teeny-tiny gripe and shouldn’t in any way ruin anyone’s enjoyment thereof. (EDIT: I actually considered deleting this whole bit, but that felt obscurely like cowardice, so I settled for a rewrite that shortened my original rant considerably).
A more immediately relevant discussion might be why Wild Blue Yonder worked where The Star Beast failed. And no, I don’t think it’s just that Our Russ got laid between script-writing sessions. Have you seen his face nowadays? He looks like a potato receiving an unexpected suppository. Nobody’s into that. No, I suspect the reason Wild Blue Yonder works is the tight focus and small scale. Essentially, its four characters- the protagonists plus two antagonists- on a spaceship, trying to out-think each other. There’s mystery, conflict and an interesting setting to provide context, and that’s all any story really needs. I often find that mistakes and poor writing creep into telly shows and films in proportion to the amount of superfluous shit they give themselves to juggle. I think there needs to be a term for that, so I’m going to coin one: ‘Concept Bloat’. The more extra characters and ideas and elements an individual episode of a TV show has, the more likely one of them is to go wrong, and when one thing goes wrong, a lot of other less-than-optimal stuff is allowed to slide by unchallenged because it looks fine next to the thing that actually went properly, fully wrong. The Star Beast is actually a perfect study of how this happens. The ‘Roth Warriors’ (I have no idea if I’m spelling that correctly, nor do I care) looked rubbish, but their rubbishness was less obvious than it should have been compared to the overall look of the episode’s fictitious London. Meanwhile, the plastic-y version of London probably seemed acceptable in the context of a plot where reversing a star-ship engine can magically heal streets. The magically-healing streets probably seemed fine because they were sharing plot-space with a wheelchair containing a hidden rocket-launcher (to clarify, I have no problem with a wheelchair that can shoot rockets- I just don’t think there’s any way you could make it look like a regular wheelchair). The sheer absurdity of this might well have gone unnoticed because, next to phrases like ‘Male Presenting Time Lord’, stupid tech probably seemed fine. And phrases like ‘Male Presenting Time Lord’ probably seemed acceptable when spoken two minutes after an encounter with a crappy-looking Roth Warrior, bringing us full circle. With a more streamlined set of ideas, it would have been easier to prune out the bad ones, or retool them until they worked. Each individual nugget of crap, however, allowed the crap on either side of it to pass unnoticed and what you ended up with was, well, The Star Beast. In contrast, Wild Blue Yonder is as tight as an XS rubber gimp suit and genuinely brilliant. It does more with less because there was time to hone and polish the less.
So what does this say about the future of the show? In my last review, I implied that the best thing that could happen to Who would be cancellation- a chance for the show to end on a satisfying note rather than change into something it was never designed to be. As much as I love Who, I’ve arrived at that the conclusion that quality alone isn’t the issue. Even if every episode of the next few series ends up being as good as Wild Blue Yonder, it still can’t go on indefinitely- not with any integrity. The best stories in the world are still only truly satisfying in the moment you close the book, having experienced the full, majestic sweep of the narrative and understood what it was saying creatively and philosophically. TV shows aren’t exactly the same, since they’re less singular efforts and don’t have a single story to tell, but even they eventually have to shit or get off the pot, which means actually ending at some point. So yes, I’m glad showrunner RTD has hit his stride with Wild Blue Yonder, but trying to bottle lightning is never going to work reliably and it doesn’t change the fact that, sooner or later, something is going to have to give. So yeah: I’m still at ‘Let Gatwa have his time and then call an end to it’. One good episode- one really fucking good episode- isn’t enough to fix the show’s underlying problem. I mean, it can be a hiatus rather than fullblown cancellation, but Who still needs some kind of break. Sorry.
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a-hobit · 3 years ago
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Y’all I used to watch Danny Phantom over and over for years I loved that shit so much and so I thought “oh a trip through my nostalgia! Blorbo!”
Not as deep as I remember it being and I think my opinion on Bitch Hartman actually kind of sours a lot of my enjoyment sometimes (sexist and homophobic jokes my detested) but otherwise if anyone was thinking about rewatching it I recommend it! It’s pretty fun for most of the time and while I didn’t love a few episodes (*COUGH COUGH* IDENTITY CRISIS *COUGH COUGH*) flanderization is really apparent in DP (Skulker, Vlad, Jazz, Sam, Danny andTucker all kind of suck in their own special ways toward the end of the series) and the way that you can pick on the writing errors pretty easy is annoying it doesn’t detract from how good it is!
Other news when Danny is not out of character and horrendously down bad he is so cute I might die. Also Sam? Not as bad as I remembered her for being towards other women! She’s typically supportive but slightly judgmental rather than outright being a killjoy. It mostly frustrates me that the writing for the other women who aren’t main characters is so shallow that it makes Sam seem like the only sane one in a room often. Buuuut to be perfectly honest idk a woman born around 1995-2005 that didn’t have a not like the other girls phase sooo
But god damn does this show make me laugh! It’s so well done — so here’s a list of some of the jokes that made me actually laugh out loud!
(In no particular order)
“Dude. You are one jacked up crazy frootloop. That will never happen.”
“But back in our college days she was just Harry — Harry CHIN!? GET IT??!”
“Agh who cares about who you were in your college days? It’s who you grow into that counts. If you can be that crazy back then and turn into a super cool ghost hunter…maybe there’s hope for me yet.
Aww thanks son…but your curfew is still ten.
Awww man!” 
“Does anyone want a cookie?
*shakes head no*
THEN PERISH!!!!!”
“The reason why Danny feels like you don’t relate to him is because you never talk to him about when you were younger!
Jazz—
When you went to college— had your first date —
Jazz—!”
“I know your little secret Danny.
YoU dO?!
The lying — the sweatiness — you have a girlfrie—!
ITS A LIE IM NOT A GHOST!!!”
“*in Walkers jail looking at past enemies*
Wow a table full of people who hate me…Just like high-school.”
“I’m perfectly happy Maddie—JACK FENTON DONT YOU DARE WIZZ ON MY RUBARB! Perfectly happy…”
“A party?? For me? ‘A decade of devoice’! You all remembered!!
Of course! And we even convinced your ex husband to come!”
“*Danny staring at Sam all lovesick*
Uhhh can you watch something other than me??
*pauses*
*pulls out a picture of Sam*
*continues staring lovesick*”
“*in a gaming lab with Tucker and Danny — Sam walks in*
What are you doing here? (To Danny) She can’t be here to play…
Oh because I’m a girl? And us girls are lacking in what? Opposable thumbs? One track minds? Stupid berets?
Hey!”
“*Danny Sam and Tucker walking though school (Danny with his shirt covering his mouth)*
Is anybody looking at me funny?!
Yeah…but that’s because you look like you’re trying to eat your way through your shirt.”
“Spooky hospital…ghosts guarding the joint…still no sign that Danny is in any real danger yet!
(Danny from inside the hospital about to be dissected)
Let me go!
Still…technically not a cry for help!
HELP!!
Well—not a cry for me!
TUCKER???!!?”
“*Danny Sam and Tucker are talking in the highschool about Danny pranking Dash*
He’s going to find out it’s you.
(Danny and Tucker) Have you seen his grades? Never gonna happen!
(Dash) Hey! This iS FENTON WIPE!
(Sam) ‘Never’ is karma’s doorbell! Ding dong it’s for you!”
“I’m Sam Manson and my happy princess talent is…(glances over at Dora who looks threatening)…
Goth haiku.
DESPAIR WITHOUT END Dora’s a ghost!
UTTER BLACKNESS — NOTHINGNESS! Dora’s a ghost!!
DORA. IS. A. GHOST!!!
(Pushed off stage)”
“I’m afraid I’ll have to take it upon myself to keep Danny safe and calm until you complete the task.
Me stay with you?! Forget it!
*manifests a little thunderstorm that electrocutes Vlad*
WILL YOU QUIT DOING THAT?!?
Look on the bright side Danny! Until we get back he’s going to have to cater to your every whim and desire…
Yeah! He wouldn’t want to make you angry…
(Vlad stares at them blankly)
(Danny smiles) This pleases me!”
“*Danny is manifesting himself in Tucker’s dream and is watching Tucker live out a fantasy where he’s a billionaire spending time with two girls who look like star*
(Tucker to janitor) That will be all Fenton.
(Dream Danny) Yes sir.
(Real Danny) Wait…I’m the janitor?!?
*later*
By the way Tucker? I don’t do windows”
“*Danny is being impersonated by Morpho and is chasing ‘Danny Fenton’ though the house as the alarms blare”
The ghost defenses! That means—!
*Fentons bust in guns blazing*
Bingo Maddie!! Putrid protoplasm straight ahead!!
And he’s after our boy!
(Morpho as DF) Ah—? Oh that’s right I’m your boy—Billy!!
Danny?!”
“*after being on a cooking show with Pamela Manson*
(Maddie to Sam) I can’t believe your mother said I had bad meal presentation— so I didn’t use a parsley sprig is that a crime?!!?”
Hope you all enjoy! I’m rewatching Gravity Falls next!
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vivithefolle · 4 years ago
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Is there anyway you could share the entire livejournal essay about Hermione's reaction to Ron coming back in DH? The few paragraphs that you referred to in your recent answer sound extremely interesting.
[The “recent answer” that goes back to... last December. Oh my god I’m such an ass I left you hanging for so long I’m so sorry.]
Okay, okay, so here goes! KEEP IN MIND: I DIDN’T WRITE THIS. I FOUND THIS ON LIVEJOURNAL AND PICKED EVERYTHING THAT I LIKED ABOUT IT, AS WELL AS SOME COMMENTS THAT INTERESTED ME.
This “essay” was actually more of a “reading the books” thing with the person sharing their thoughts and ideas about it. The person was clearly a Snape fan, but they had sympathy for Ron too. I’ll try to formate it as accurately as I can remember it.
And now, here it is:
---
ORDER OF THE PHOENIX
[About Ron being made a prefect.] The essayist: It’s sad, but this probably is the first time Ron’s beaten Harry at something. And the last time.
A commenter: Ron's had a really difficult life, and this is the book that proved it for me. It made me a Ron fan. Just look at the interactions he has with Fred and George. This is commonplace. I know a lot of people don't like Ron, but just look at this book, this chapter especially. People have accused Ron of being lazy, unambitious, having no emotions, and being a big stupid boy. It's just not true. Look at how Fred and George needle him out of jealousy. Look at how they treat Percy. Imagine Ron having to grow up with two older brothers that will not hesitate to bother, torture and torment people that stand out or that get more attention than they do or that cross them. He saw it happening with Percy, so what's he going to learn? He'll learn to shut up unless he wants to have something happen to him. He'll learn that standing out positively is rewarded with cruelty. I can understand how Mrs. Weasley could not have fully protected him from those two. Not all the time, not while trying to also care for Ginny, keeping up with her other kids in school, and running the household. Worst of all, punishing F&G doesn't seem to do anything. Those two just don't care/they crave the attention, negative or positive. The best thing she could've done would be to give them no attention, but that's so against her nature that unfortunately she just fed the monsters. No emotions? Is it really difficult to understand that sensitivity wouldn't be encouraged in young Ron? He's got these two bullies that only want a reaction out of him. If he cries, it'll only encourage them. Any reaction is encouraging to them, but he has to go with anger. It's a survival thing- puff yourself up, make yourself look bigger than you are so the predator messes with you a little less. Look at the pride Ron's showing in his badge. The desire to do well is there. He likes the good feeling that comes with it, but he's been hard-wired since birth that it's better to be "middle of the pack". In later chapters, I know you'll have to point out the way the power makes Ron behave, so I just want to start on the defence now. It's all Ron knows. It's all he's been taught. It's a huge character flaw, but it's what makes him so human. Rowling did develop this in the book, but only accidentally. We're never going to get a good look at Ron's psychology except through these hints because it's, as usual, All About Harry. Ron's flawed, but I hope we remember that he has a reason why he's got those flaws. It doesn't excuse him, but it really explains him. So yeah... that's why I defend Ron.
...
“I’m not Percy,’ he finished defiantly.”
The essayist: Mmmm-hm. Ron feels nervous at the thought of his good fortune inspiring anger in someone and what's his first defence? "I'm not Percy"? Man, the evidence that the Twins' psychological torment has left lasting scars on Ron could not have been more obvious if he'd shielded himself and said "Please don't jinx me, Fred! ... I mean Harry. ... Shit, what'd I say?"
...
“Excellent,”  said  Ron,  with  a  kind  of  groan  of  longing,  and  he  seized the nearest plate of chops and began piling them onto his plate, watched wistfully by Nearly Headless Nick. “What  were  you  saying  before  the  Sorting?”  Hermione  asked  the  ghost. “About the hat giving warnings?” “Oh  yes,”  said  Nick,  who  seemed  glad  of  a  reason  to  turn  away  from  Ron,  who  was  now  eating  roast  potatoes  with  almost  indecent  enthusiasm.
The essayist: Ron’s not being very restrained with his eating, is he?
The commenter: I don't know if it's accidental or not, but this is one of those moments that I love, one of the tellings of Ron's home life via his behavior. In this scenario, he's totally a kitten who just got adopted to a house where he's the only cat. He's at a table with food, so his instinct is to eat as fast as he can or his siblings will yoink it. It doesn't help that there are many other people around, encouraging the "get the good stuff fast or you'll have to sate yourself on bread or whatever nobody wants". Ron is so much more human than Harry! How can Harry not be showing any signs of his "horrendous abuse" for eleven years? Well... I guess he sort of does when he buys all that stuff in his first year. And I guess Ron has to go back home every summer where it gets reinforced. But Harry goes back every summer, too... what the hell?
...
“What’s going on?” Ron  had  appeared  in  the  doorway.  His  wide  eyes  traveled  from  Harry,  who  was  kneeling  on  his  bed  with  his  wand  pointing  at  Seamus, to Seamus, who was standing there with his fists raised. “He’s having a go at my mother!” Seamus yelled. “What?” said Ron. “Harry wouldn’t do that — we met your mother, we liked her. . .” “That’s  before  she  started  believing  every  word  the  stinking  Daily  Prophet writes about me!” said Harry at the top of his voice. “Oh,”  said  Ron,  comprehension  dawning  across  his  freckled  face.  “Oh . . . right.” “You know what?” said Seamus heatedly, casting Harry a venomous look.  “He’s  right,  I  don’t  want  to  share  a  dormitory  with  him  anymore, he’s a madman.” “That’s out of order, Seamus,” said Ron, whose ears were starting to glow red, always a danger sign. “Out of order, am I?” shouted Seamus, who in contrast with Ron ‘was  turning  paler.  “You  believe  all  the  rubbish  he’s  come  out  with  about You-Know-Who, do you, you reckon he’s telling the truth?” “Yeah, I do!” said Ron angrily. “Then you’re mad too,” said Seamus in disgust. “Yeah?  Well  unfortunately  for  you,  pal,  I’m  also  a  prefect!”  said  Ron,  jabbing  himself  in  the  chest  with  a  finger.  “So  unless  you  want  detention, watch your mouth!”
The essayist: Note how Ron’s first reaction is to side with Harry.
The commenter: Not surprising because of the best friends thing (some might argue) but I say it's not surprising considering how Hermione and Ron were treating Harry like a ticking time bomb. Survival!
...
“Hello, Harry!” It was Cho Chang and what was more, she was on her own again. This was most unusual: Cho was almost always surrounded by a gang of giggling girls; Harry remembered the agony of trying to get her by herself to ask her to the Yule Ball. “Hi,” said Harry, feeling his face grow hot. At least you’re not covered  in Stinksap this time, he told himself. Cho seemed to be thinking along the same lines. “You got that stuff off, then?” “Yeah,”  said  Harry,  trying  to  grin  as  though  the  memory  of  their  last meeting was funny as opposed to mortifying. “So did you . . . er . . . have a good summer?” The moment he had said this he wished he hadn’t: Cedric had been Cho’s boyfriend and the memory of his death must have affected her holiday  almost  as  badly  as  it  had  affected  Harry’s.  .  . Something  seemed  to  tauten  in  her  face,  but  she  said,  “Oh,  it  was  all  right,  you  know. . .” “Is  that  a  Tornados  badge?”  Ron  demanded  suddenly,  pointing  at  the front of Cho’s robes, to which a sky-blue badge emblazoned with a double gold T was pinned. “You don’t support them, do you?” “Yeah, I do,” said Cho. “Have  you  always  supported  them,  or  just  since  they  started  winning the league?” said Ron, in what Harry considered an unnecessarily accusatory tone of voice. “I’ve supported them since I was six,” said Cho coolly. “Anyway . . . see you, Harry.” She  walked  away.  Hermione  waited  until  Cho  was  halfway  across  the courtyard before rounding on Ron. “You are so tactless!”
The essayist: So Harry meets Cho, makes a complete faux pas and reminds her of her dead boyfriend. Ron quickly steers the conversation away onto something more happy, i.e., Quidditch, before Cho can get too upset. Nevertheless, Ron is apparently the insensitive jerk around here, not Harry.
[If this reminds you of something, then yes, I absolutely took what the essayist was saying and elaborated on it. I confess, I am a dirty thief.]
...
“Well, I suppose he could’ve played better,” Harry muttered, “but it was only the first training session, like you said. . .” Neither Harry nor Ron seemed to make much headway with their homework  that  night.  Harry  knew  Ron  was  too  preoccupied  with  how  badly  he  had  performed  at  Quidditch  practice  and  he  himself  was having difficulty in getting the chant of “Gryffindor are losers” out of his head. [...] And so they worked on while the sky outside the windows became steadily darker; slowly, the crowd in the common room began to thin again.   At   half-past   eleven,   Hermione   wandered   over   to   them,   yawning. “Nearly done?” “No,” said Ron shortly. “Jupiter’s  biggest  moon  is  Ganymede,  not  Callisto,”  she  said,  pointing over Ron’s shoulder at a line in his Astronomy essay, “and it’s Io that’s got the volcanos.” “Thanks,” snarled Ron, scratching out the offending sentences.
The essayist: So Ron’s getting basic facts wrong in his essays.
The commenter: This is going to look so contrived, but I genuinely believe it, and maybe after these reviews, your standards for contrived have dropped enough for me to pass the bar :3 But... he's not putting in any effort. His ego can't take another beating at the moment (even punching bags have limits). Imagine it- after the Quidditch humiliation with his friend the Star Athlete (when he really was trying) he tries to distract himself by doing school work 1. which he isn't very good at anyway, 2. with the Star Athlete of Academics/Slytherin Spectator Crowd best friend Hermione there 3. with Hermione there to set it right anyway (it sounds as if Hermione isn’t so much correcting their essays as writing them herself). If he tries his best at this and then fails at that, Ron probably would start to consider suicide. It's self-preservation at this point to put in zero effort. This kind of fail is literally "I'm not trying because I have given up."
...
She  wrenched  her  bag  open;  Harry  thought  she  was  about  to  put  her books away, but instead she pulled out two misshapen woolly objects,  placed  them  carefully  on  a  table  by  the  fireplace,  covered  them  with  a  few  screwed-up  bits  of  parchment  and  a  broken  quill,  and  stood back to admire the effect. “What  in  the  name  of  Merlin  are  you  doing?”  said  Ron,  watching  her as though fearful for her sanity. “They’re  hats  for  house-elves,”  she  said  briskly,  now  stuffing  her  books  back  into  her  bag.  “I  did  them  over  the  summer.  I’m  a  really  slow  knitter  without  magic,  but  now  I’m  back  at  school  I  should  be  able to make lots more.” “You’re leaving out hats for the house-elves?” said Ron slowly. “And you’re covering them up with rubbish first?” “Yes,” said Hermione defiantly, swinging her bag onto her back. “That’s not on,” said Ron angrily. “You’re trying to trick them into picking  up  the  hats.  You’re  setting  them  free  when  they  might  not  want to be free.” “Of  course  they  want  to  be  free!”  said  Hermione  at  once,  though  her face was turning pink. “Don’t you dare touch those hats, Ron!” She left. Ron waited until she had disappeared through the door to the girls’ dormitories, then cleared the rubbish off the woolly hats. They  should  at  least  see  what  they’re  picking  up,”  he  said  firmly.  “Anyway  .  .  .”  He  rolled  up  the  parchment  on  which  he  had  written  the title of Snape’s essay. “There’s no point trying to finish this now, I can’t  do  it  without  Hermione,  I  haven’t  got  a  clue  what  you’re  supposed to do with moonstones, have you?”
The essayist: This doesn’t seem like a particularly open-minded and enquiring position to take, although I suppose that Hermione’s open-mindedness has always been something of an informed attribute.
The commenter: This trope among fans has got me riled up beyond belief because they use the "Hermione's word is gospel" thing to make unfair assumptions about other characters: Ron's "emotional range of a teaspoon" thing comes to mind, and right after that, Lavender supposedly being silly about believing Trelawney about her dead pet (Hermione never considered that maybe the thing Lavender was dreading was bad news from home or bad news about her pet). Regarding house elves: This is one case where the fans ought to have seen that Hermione was being very thoughtless as far as strategy. Ron has lived all his life up until this point thinking that there was no problem with house elves and she literally expects to be able to just tell him "it's wrong" and he's supposed to change instantly? Talk about your cultural insensitivity. In this case, maybe Ron knows better than you do, Hermione? You didn't even know about house elves until you were at least twelve (but more likely, she didn't know until this year). She must understand the concept of "he doesn't know it's wrong". That was how she defended Crookshanks when he was chasing Scabbers. ... Hey, Hermione thinks Ron's smarter than her cat. That's something, I guess.
...
The commenter: Competition is seriously the worst thing in the world for Ron. He's got wa-a-ay too much baggage. Do well so they'll love you. Do well so they'll notice you. If they notice you, you'll get praised. And tormented by Fred and George. Then if you fuck up, you'll have let everyone down. My brothers never let anyone down. That's the standard. Oh God, I can't live up to that. Which do I want to chose- being ignored or scorned? I could do well. Then I'll be good enough to be called "just like them"! JFC, when's it ever going to be "Good like Ron"? Chess. Literally everyone else has one thing they shine in, even Neville with his Botany and Dean with his art (and... and I'm going to ignore the fact that Hermione and Luna are the only two I can think of with non-appearance based special stuff... someone please help me out? I guess Tonks' doesn't really count as a shallow one because it makes her a master of disguise...)
...
HALF-BLOOD PRINCE
...
Ron gagged on a large piece of kipper. Hermione spared him one look of disdain before turning back to Harry.
The essayist: “Hermione spared [Ron] one look of disdain before turning back to Harry” pretty much sums up her relationships within the trio. It’s no wonder Ron’s so insecure and keeps worrying that she really fancies Harry.
...
“And you’ve been through all that persecution from the Ministry when they were trying to make out you were unstable and a liar. You can still see the marks on the back of your hand where that evil woman made you write with your own blood, but you stuck to your story anyway...”  “You  can  still  see  where  those  brains  got  hold  of  me  in  the  Ministry,  look,”  said  Ron,  shaking  back his sleeves.  “And  it  doesn’t  hurt  that  you’ve  grown  about  a  foot  over  the  summer  either,”  Hermione  finished, ignoring Ron.  “I’m tall,” said Ron inconsequentially.
The essayist: Ron’s so adorably pathetic here, the way he’s obviously feeling inferior to Harry and being ignored by his so-called friends. *hugs Ron*
...
When they left the Gryffindor table five minutes later to head down to the Quidditch pitch, they passed  Lavender  Brown  and  Parvati  Patil.  Remembering  what  Hermione  had  said  about  the  Patil  twins’  parents  wanting  them  to  leave  Hogwarts,  Harry  was  unsurprised  to  see  that  the  two  best  friends were whispering together, looking distressed. What did surprise him was that when Ron drew level with them, Parvati suddenly nudged Lavender, who looked around and gave Ron a wide smile. Ron blinked at her, then returned the smile uncertainly. His walk instantly became something more like a strut. Harry resisted the temptation to laugh, remembering that Ron had refrained from doing so  after  Malfoy  had  broken  Harry’s  nose;  Hermione,  however,  looked  cold  and  distant  all  the  way  down  to  the  stadium  through  the  cool,  misty  drizzle,  and  departed  to  find  a  place  in  the  stands  without wishing Ron good luck. 
The essayist: Hermione keeps belittling Ron and doing him down, and reacts quite strongly when he even so much hints at losing interest in her and showing attention to another woman. Can we say “abusive relationship”, anybody?
...
“Harry! Ginny!” Hermione was hurrying toward them, very pink-faced and wearing a cloak, hat, and gloves. “I got back a couple of hours ago, I've just been down to visit Hagrid and Buck--I mean Witherwings,” she said breathlessly. “Did you have a good Christmas?” “Yeah,” said Ron at once, “pretty eventful, Rufus Scrim—” “I've got something for you, Harry,” said Hermione, neither looking at Ron nor giving any sign that she had heard him. “Oh, hang on--password. Abstinence.”
The essayist: Wow, Hermione’s just being so childish here, ignoring Ron when he’s talking directly to her. Incidentally, Ron’s speaking to her like a normal friend, it’s Hermione who’s doing the blanking. Still, I’m sure this argument is all Ron’s fault for daring to go out with another girl. Hermione is totally blameless.
[Just in case: the essayist is being sarcastic, they’re pointing out the double standard of the HP fandom blaming Hermione’s immature behaviour on Ron.]
...
DEATHLY HALLOWS
...
“I think you’re right,” she told him. “It’s just a morality tale, it’s obvious which gift is best, which one you’d choose—” The three of them spoke at the same time; Hermione said, “the Cloak,” Ron said, “the wand,” and Harry said, “the stone.” They looked at each other, half surprised, half amused. “You’re supposed to say the Cloak,” Ron told Hermione, “but you wouldn’t need to be invisible if you had the wand. An unbeatable wand, Hermione, come on!” “We’ve already got an Invisibility Cloak,” said Harry. “And it’s helped us rather a lot, in case you hadn’t noticed!” said Hermione. “Whereas the wand would be bound to attract trouble—” “Only if you shouted about it,” argued Ron. “Only if you were prat enough to go dancing around, waving it over your head, and singing, ‘I’ve got an unbeatable wand, come and have a go if you think you’re good enough.’ As long as you kept your trap shut—” “Yes, but could you keep your trap shut?” said Hermione, looking skeptical. “You know, the only true thing he said to us was that there have been stories about extra-powerful wands for hundreds of years.” “There have?” asked Harry. Hermione looked exasperated: the expression was so endearingly familiar that Harry and Ron grinned at each other.
The commenter (?): Actually, I thought that Ron was proving the errors in the story. Because he’s right. The eldest brother didn’t die because the Elder Wand had corrupted him (like the One Ring). He died because he was an idiot. He died because he randomly decided to start blabbing about his new toy.
“You talk about wands like they’ve got feelings,” said Harry, “like they canthink for themselves.” “The wand chooses the wizard,” said Ollivander. “That much has always been clear to those of us who have studied wandlore.” “A person can still use a wand that hasn’t chosen them, though?” asked Harry. “Oh yes, if you are any wizard at all you will be able to channel your magic through almost any instrument. The best results, however, must always come where there is the strongest affinity between wizard and wand. These connections are complex. An initial attraction, and then a mutual quest for experience, the wand learning from the wizard, the wizard from the wand.”
The essayist: Harry’s wand has to think for and protect him because he’s too stupid and incompetent to think for and protect himself! Ollivander’s the expert, and he just admitted it. He said any halfway decent wizard can perform magic with almost any wand. The reason Harry could only work with the holly wand is because of the phoenix feather core it shares with Voldemort’s wand. That is, it wasn’t Harry doing the magic with Harry’s wand! It was the Voldemort soul piece! Once Harry was forced to use wands that didn’t have that core, the soul piece couldn’t do the work for Harry any more. He was forced to rely on his own magical powers and competence, which are clearly minimal. This is proven by his inability to do effective magic with any other wand. It’s also proven by an incident from Philosopher’s Stone. Remember when Harry was being chased by bullies and inexplicably found himself on top of the shed roof? That was the soul piece allowing him to fly like Voldy. Lily could slow her descent from a height, as if she had an invisible parachute, but that is not the same as flying, and we have no evidence she could fly. Only Voldemort and Snape fly without assistance! The evidence is overwhelming that I am right. How many spells can Harry do effectively? Expelliarmus, Expecto Patronum, Protego--that’s it. Even as a young adult, he is incapable of doing the basic healing or cleaning spells a young child should have down pat before going to Hogwarts. Of course, we’re told the Patronus spell is difficult and advanced, but who told us that? Remus Lupin, friend of Harry’s father, sycophant, and notorious liar, particularly when it comes to flattering Harry. Recall Lupin also said Snape didn’t like James because Snape was envious of Potter Sr.’s Quidditch prowess, and we know that was a lie. Given this evidence, anything Lupin says that cannot be confirmed by an independent source, especially regarding the Potters, should be dismissed out of hand. True, Hermione has trouble with the Patronus spell, and she’s super-competent. Doesn’t that prove it’s a very difficult spell? Not at all. To take an example from a different field, Beethoven was a virtuoso organist, the greatest pianist of his day, one of the greatest pianists in history, and probably the greatest improvisational musician ever. But he was only a decent violinist. Everybody has areas of weakness, no matter how good they are overall. In addition, Hermione is very gullible where authority figures are concerned. If a teacher tells her, “The Patronus is a very difficult, advanced spell that many people can’t ever master,” she’ll believe that, which may create a self-fulfilling prophecy. A couple of years ago, another DTCL member and I facetiously suggested Harry was less intelligent than his wand. We didn’t know we were right. It rarely happens, but this is an occasion when I would have preferred to be wrong.
...
If only there was a way of getting a better wand... And desire for the Elder Wand, the Deathstick, unbeatable, invincible, swal-lowed him once more... They packed up the tent next morning and moved on through a dreary shower of rain. The downpour pursued them to the coast, where they pitched the tent that night, and persisted through the whole week, through sodden landscapes that Harry found bleak and depressing. He could think only of the Deathly Hallows. It was as though a flame had been lit inside him that nothing, not Hermione’s flat disbelief nor Ron’s persistent doubts, could extinguish. And yet the fiercer the longing for the Hallows burned inside him, the less joyful it made him. He blamed Ron and Hermione: Their determined indifference was as bad as the relentless rain for dampening his spirits, but neither could erode his certainty, which remained absolute. Harry’s belief in and longing for the Hallows consumed him so much that he felt isolated from the other two and their obsession with the Horcruxes. [...] As the weeks crept on, Harry could not help but notice, even through his new self-absorption, that Ron seemed to be taking charge. Perhaps because he was determined to make up for having walked out on them, perhaps because Harry’s descent into listlessness galvanized his dormant leadership qualities, Ron was the one now encouraging and exhorting the other two into action. [...] But not until March did luck favor Ron at last.
The essayist: MARCH! That’s right, ladies and gentlemen. The first fifteen pages of this chapter cover three months, and during that entire time, Harry Potter does nothing, nothing, but sit on his ass fantasizing about the Elder Wand and trying to connect with his Voldie-soul mate. Oh, wait. He also tries to open the snitch so he can get the stone out of it. (Nothing gay about that, either.) I wish he’d succeed in that, too. Maybe he’d swallow the stone, and it would end up in his scrotum. He sure needs something that works down there. Harry doesn’t have the right to bail out on his society like this. He can’t have it both ways. He can’t have the adulation that goes with being Mr. Boy-Who-Lived-Chosen-One-Wizarding-World-Savior and abdicate the responsibilities that go along with those titles and that adulation. Look at what happens in this chapter: Harry becomes obsessed with finding and uniting the Hallows, so much so that he withdraws from his friends, bails out on the job his idol Dumbledore gave him, and spends all his time brooding and trying to connect with the Dull Lord. In other words, he acts clinically depressed. Ron and Hermione were exposed to the same information Harry was, but they didn’t become obsessed/depressed. Ron was mildly interested in the Super-Wand, but not enough to distract him from the Horcrux hunt. Hermione dismissed the whole DH story as nonsense and continued following Dumbestbore’s orders. So why weren’t they tempted?
...
The essayist: Harry opens the locket using Parseltongue--interesting that this never occurred to him before now--and two ghostly figures emerge. They’re Voldie-versions of Harry and Hermione, and they articulate Ron’s worst fears: “Least loved, always, by the mother who craved a daughter...Least loved, now, by the girl who prefers your friend...Second best, always, eternally overshadowed...” I’ll say it again: When you’re right, you’re right. The evidence is overwhelming that Molly Weasley treated Ron the worst of all her children. And if Rowling doesn’t want us to ship HP/HG, she needs to quit throwing them together and making them leaders, with Ron either in the background or absent entirely. JKR obviously wants us to automatically dismiss certain statements just because they’re made by “bad guys” such as Voldemort and Rita Skeeter. There are two problems with this: (1) The “lies” make perfect sense, far more sense than what we’re supposed to believe. (2) Even pathological liars sometimes tell the truth, typically when it won’t hurt their own interests to do so. For those of us who live in what cartoonist Garry Trudeau calls “the reality-based community,” the evidence is what matters, not what we’re told by authority figures. Those of us in the higher stages of spiritual development are funny that way.
...
The essayist: Well, whose fault is that, Ms. Rowling? You’re the one who’s spent the last four books making Ron dumber and dumber, depriving him of any meaningful activity, while you shoved Harry and Hermione into increasingly dominant roles.
The commenter: Are we supposed to look down on Ron now so that we can condemn him for leaving Harry and Hermione? Because if so, then that’s just unfair. Every time Ron tries to come up with an idea, Hermione criticizes him or shoots him down. And the twins have done a fine job of intimidating Ron into remaining mediocre and modest so that he doesn’t remind them of Percy, so what is he supposed to do? How is he supposed to come up with ideas when he’s surrounded by people who basically tell him to shut up and sit down?
The essayist: Just then, Hermione comes out of the tent with cups of tea, with tears running down her face and looking terrified her “friend” is going to curse her with her own wand.
The commenter: So, Hermione will snarl at Ron all day long, but cower in fear when Harry gets mad. Is she projecting herself onto Harry and assuming that just because *she’s* quick to hex people who anger her (Ron, Marietta, etc.), Harry will do the same to her?
The essayist: The evidence is overwhelming that Molly Weasley treated Ron the worst of all her children.
The commenter: And blatantly showed favoritism to Harry while snarling at Ron in the same breath. Of course, Horcrux!Tom doesn’t bring that up, because JKR would have to admit that there might be something wrong with Molly favoring Harry the way she does. The essayist: Hermione acts so crazy Harry has to put a protection charm between her and Ron.
The commenter: Yeah…sorry, it’s not “slapstick” anymore when somebody actually has to stop her from hitting Ron. When Harry feels that the situation is dangerous enough that his intervention is necessary. That’s not funny. That’s a true-crime episode. What gets me is that Hermione's tantrum lasts for days. It goes on for several pages into the next chapter. She doesn't start acting normal again until she comes up with the idea of visiting Xeno Lovegood. The essayist: Hermione tells Ron she still hasn’t ruled out attacking him with birds again.
The commenter: *flatly* So, all of the fans who cooed about how “great” it was for Hermione to show “girl power” by sending Ron to the hospital wing in HBP or breezily dismissed the scene as just tired teenage melodrama? Can put a sock in it. Hermione has clearly learned nothing, JKR clearly feels that that scene was funny, and at no point are we supposed to think that Hermione is an abuser. Even though, if the genders were reversed, fans would be calling for Ron’s head on a platter if he dared lay a finger on Hermione. No. This isn’t funny. This isn’t charming. Hermione hurt Ron so badly in HBP that he had to go to the hospital wing. And she tried to repeat the damage she caused here. Is she going to attack him with birds again after they get married? Is she going to do it in front of their children? Will it be “cute” and “funny” then? No, if a man is an abusive monster for losing his temper and trying to hurt his girlfriend, then Hermione is an abusive monster for losing her temper and trying to hurt her boyfriend. Not only did Hermione land Ron in the infirmary with the first attack, but she wants to do it again at a time when they are on the run. She will NOT be able to take an injured Ron to Hogwarts infirmary, nor to St. Mungos. In other words - she intends for him to remain injured and stick with them while camping, or else he must apparate away while injured, risking another splinching so he could be healed.
...
The essayist: Ron and Harry go back to the tent, and Harry fades into the background so as not to interfere with the lovers’ reunion. That’s a mistake. After Harry wakes Hermione, she shows her delight at Ron’s return by--attacking him? She punches him over a dozen times while yelling at him and screaming for her wand from Harry. Remember last chapter, when I talked about how immature Hermione is? Here’s your proof.
[The essayist quotes an article that I haven’t been able to find, but paraphrased: it speaks of a father who came to pick up his 4 y/o daughter from daycare, a little later than usual, and the daughter reacted by punching and hitting her father, upset at his being late. Additional read:  “The parents must know that physical aggression is a common yet natural problem faced by toddlers.”]
The essayist: So there you have it: Hermione Granger, know-it-all supergirl, is so immature she acts like a preschool child when the boyfriend she’s been missing finally returns. I’m not suggesting she has a father-daughter relationship with Ron; this kind of anger is found in other relationships, too. What I am saying is that her way of expressing her anger is appropriate for a very young child. While adults may certainly feel this kind of anger and desire to hit when reunited with a loved one under similar circumstances, they don’t act it out. That restraint is what separates adults from children. Hermione acts so crazy Harry has to put a protection charm between her and Ron. I frankly found her behavior so out of control as to suggest mental instability. She engages in two full pages of histrionics before throwing herself into a chair, sitting so tensely I’m surprised the circulation isn’t cut off to her arms and legs. She remains in a bratty snit until the end of the chapter, which is another six pages.  Hermione is still pouting the next morning. I’m wondering if her real problem is not that Ron left, but that she didn’t. Is she angry at him because he had the guts to admit they were blowing it and take a time out, while she just kept trailing along after Harry like a lost house elf? I think she’s definitely mad because she’s always controlled Ron and their relationship. How dare he assert his independence of her! Who does he think he is? Her equal? In an AU, maybe. This is called the Potterverse after all, not the Ronverse.  Hermione’s having a bad month. First Ron runs out on them; then she saves Harry’s life, but he’s an ungrateful jerk about it; then Harry asserts his independence; then Ron comes back but doesn’t grovel sufficiently for her taste. All this mistreatment is going to give her the idea she’s just a normal character and not an Author’s Darling.   While Ron was gone, he was captured by bad guys called Snatchers, who are bounty hunters for Voldemort. In getting away, he got a spare wand, which he gives to Harry. Of course, it doesn’t work as well as Harry’s “real” wand, so Harry’s still in a snit about that, and with Hermione in a snit, too, they’re a cheerful bunch. Honestly, I don’t know why Ron puts up with these two. The Hs are so spoiled and self-centered, they deserve each other, but I don’t think this is what HP/HG shippers mean when they proclaim the two as an OTP. Sane, normal Ron doesn’t deserve either one of them. Run, Ron! Run while you still can!
...
The essayist: As an interesting aside, ròn is the Celtic word for seal. In Druid lore, seals represent love, longing, and dilemma. No more appropriate totem animal could be imagined for this boy whose sense of selfhood is undermined by his longing for love from a rejecting mother and inadequate father, and who, like the selchie wives of folklore, is faced with the impossible choice of being who he truly is and being rejected, or denying the best part of himself to gain love. Ron’s intelligence and independence threaten his insecure wife (and best friend), just as the selchie’s identity as a seal-woman threatens her human husband; Ron imprisons himself by hiding who he is so the Hs can feel smart and in charge, just as the selchie’s human husband imprisons his wife by hiding her sealskin in a trunk.
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ladder-discourse · 4 years ago
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Please... I wanna know more abt the urban fantasy AU... it's so fun
@collaberal-damage OH GOSH... mLKDfsmmdslk this is the part where I have to reveal the fact that I’m a sham and I actually have VERY little worked out. LIKE. I’VE BEEN DESPERATELY WANTING TO COME UP WITH WORLD BUILDING STUFF... Rules of the setting and details about other characters and whatnot??? But the two people I talk about it w/ the most aren’t canon familiar past the trilogy so I haven’t done a ton of bouncing ideas around yet. Which makes this ask a blessing?? I actually worked out a few things in the course of writing it, so, thank you for that :’)
This got horrendously long and is probably way, WAY more info than you were asking for, I’m so sorry.
Unsurprisingly most of what I have worked out has to do w/ Edgeworth and how werewolves work?? Because this whole thing really started with narumitsu fluff/angst and just wound up expanding beyond that when I began to ponder what kind of monsters/entities the other characters would be.
Lycanthropy in this setting: I think it comes in a lot of different flavors and can be passed on to someone else by a number of means? But the old rule of Receive Bite From Werewolf = You Are Now Also Cursed, definitely still holds true, and the contagious factor of the condition is just one of the reasons why they are frequently stigmatized within supernatural society.
They’re also generally perceived as being volatile and dangerous, because transformations outside of the full moon can trigger if the individual is put under enough stress (hence Edgeworth getting ‘furrier’ whenever he gets flustered. Which, INCIDENTALLY, never used to happen before Phoenix showed back up in his life, DAMN That Man). There’s this perception that no ‘upstanding/upper-class citizens’ are werewolves, basically, and Edgeworth has been conditioned to believe that it would ruin his career if his “true nature” were exposed to the public.
Apollo is also a werewolf, but he hasn’t been conditioned to hate himself in the same way Edgeworth has, so he’s more in touch with that side of himself. PLUS, he doesn’t have the same image to keep up that Edgeworth does. Obviously he has OTHER problems going on, but being constantly in fear of being exposed to the world as a wolf man isn’t one of them.
(CW for this next bit, emotional abuse of a young child) Miles has had lycanthropy since he was very small and MVK uses his condition as an additional means by which to emotionally abuse and manipulate him. Mainly by doing gross shit like:
subtly implying that he’s sub-human!
reminding him that his emotions make him a danger to others and that it’s his responsibility to lock them all away. (If it serves the interest of turning him into a stone cold conviction machine, all the better)
Shit talking monsters and supernatural entities in general, as if Miles isn’t even there and listening to all this shit.
In terms of SETTING and what society looks like in this AU, here’s some loose ideas that I’m still ironing out:
Magic/Monsters/Etc are sort of a “loosely kept” secret, like the rest of the world can’t know about (or interact with?) the whole supernatural community for Reasons that I’m still trying to settle on.
There’re a handful of privileged humans who help keep the lid on this whole secret side of society by using sorcery and such.
MOSTLY the people in these positions are just those who have the means/connections/social standing to be able to learn magic in the first place. Like magical capability in humans is not based on a particular natural aptitude or anything, it’s just, “can you get access to the resources you need to learn to cast spells safely”.
Unsurprisingly, a lot of the people in these positions of power are basically hoarding influence/wealth under the guise of keeping both worlds “safe” from each other.
Some other tidbits we’ve worked out...
As he’s part dragon, Phoenix has some VERY minimal rain/weather based powers. Unfortunately they’re SUPER unreliable and he can’t really control them? Like he rarely knows for sure if any particular rainstorm is actually caused by him or not.
Sometimes it starts raining while he and Edgeworth are out somewhere, and Phoenix just absentmindedly apologizes for it without explaining why.
This baffles Edgeworth immensely. Why in the heck is this idiot apologizing on behalf of the WEATHER???
Later on, when the “I’m part dragon” conversation does finally happen, he looks back on these moments with horror and wonders how he didn’t logic that shit together sooner.
Larry Butz is just a normal human dude, but his whole family has been like, immensely cursed? He’s basically Stanley Yelnats. The poor man just keeps stumbling into fucked up supernatural scenarios.
Y’know that whole upper crust society of people who’re trying to keep a lid on all this magical stuff that I mentioned previously? They have basically just given up trying to keep him out of this shit, because it just KEEPS HAPPENING.
Regarding the Feys: I think I’ve settled on them being a very old family of fox-folk/kitsune(?)?? The Kurain channeling technique in this case is like a very rare form of spiritual magic that only they can master, but they’re also adept at other kinds of spells too! Maya frequently uses her abilities to pull silly pranks on Nick.
Franziska likely got cursed with vampirism at some point in the months after her father was convicted for killing Gregory. MVK was not a vampire himself and generally held disdain for non-humans, so uhh. That’s a fun new issue for her that I’m looking forward to potentially exploring a bit further :’)
Will Powers is also a werewolf. This is part of what draws Edgeworth to the Steel Samurai series, because it’s inspirational to him that the guy behind the mask has the same magical condition that he does!
Regarding the Gavin brothers: I think they’re both demon or fey or something. I haven’t worked out much beyond that, but I’m open to suggestions!
Pretty much anyone who has an animal sort of aspect to them inherently has the ability to shift into that animal, just bc I think that’s fun. Kay can turn into a crow, Maya and Pearls can turn into foxes, Edgeworth and Apollo (obviously) can turn into wolves... The exception is Phoenix, who can’t turn into a dragon... At least, not that hes’ aware of?? IDK maybe that’s an ability he can unlock further down the line. The idea of noodle dragon Feen IS extremely appealing.
I have not figured out any explanations or roles for Trucy, or the Gramaryes, or the Perceive ability just yet, but it is ON MY LIST. Trucy is best girl and and I don’t want to leave her out of the fun.
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Celebration
In which an unexpected servant congratulates my mastersona for both passing their Mage Exams and helping Gudako complete yet another singularity!
(The true backstory is that I recently finished all of my essays, my thesis and exam- so thought I should treat myself by writing a fic to commemorate it!!! YIPPEE!!)
Staring blankly at the spotless ivory walls looming above their head, Seihai frowned. Listlessly plonking yet another slice of pizza into their mouth, they flopped onto their bed.
‘What the heck do I do with my life now?’ At current, Chaldea had lapsed into a week-long festival, due to everybody successfully completing yet another singularity.
As a result of this, Gudako managed to rouse the entirety of Chaldea into a tremendous partying mood; in which servants were blasting sparklers at one another; Liz was hogging the speakers to blast out her latest hit tunes; and the Chaldea kitchen was overwhelmed with both chefs as well as hungry customers.
Although Seihai did actively partake in some of the activities, and was overjoyed to see Chaldea enveloped in such joy, a gnawing sense of unease still tore at their stomach. Even though today was the dawn of Chadea’s first ever Nightclub Party- a day that Seihai had been dying to experience- said anxiety made it all but impossible to enjoy it.
‘I’m not in the mood to party anymore,’ Seihai languidly flicked through the television channels, eventually landing upon yet another battle anime. ‘I dunno...It feels like the victory’s hollow or something...’
In Seihai’s eyes, the one who did the bulk of the work during singularities were Gudako, Mash, the staff and their servants. When it came to Seihai’s own place in this war; they had no idea in hell where they belonged. Besides from offering support, assistance, and lessening the load on Gudako’s shoulders- by providing mana to servants that Gudako hadn’t the energy to supply- they were naught but a small bit-piece in the war.
Clutching their fists -as a character on the television behind them began to yell, they contemplated the box of pizza sitting before them.
As a treat for also passing the Mage Association’s rather convoluted, and extremely unnecessary Online Mage’s Exam with flying colors, Seihai had more or less begged Boudicca to make some pizza- so that they could celebrate on their lonesome. Lifting the glimmering slice towards the sky, Seihai smiled wryly.
“Congratulations, me. We’ve fought hard. Let’s not let the negativity beat us today.” Before they could chow down on the beautiful, tantalizing slice- an array of golden sparkles invaded their vision, as they choked on their slice.
‘H-HOLY SHIT!!!’ Slapping their back, they managed to slide the slice back out again, only to be distracted by a horrendous clunking noise; as Seihai’s room shook like a tornado.
Only one person would enter their room like this.
Spinning their head to the side, they take sight of the king’s pernicious smirk; his red eyes sparkling with impish glee.
“G-Gilgamesh....You sure as hell caught me off guard this time.” Sighing audibly, Seihai rubbed their crimson red locks of hair. “Why don’t you like to knock before entering?”
“You would ask one as mighty as I- the King of Heroes- to knock on your measly door before entering?” He looked genuinely shocked by the suggestion. “Have you lost your mind, by perchance?”
“I feel like we’ve gone through an argument like this already.” Helping themselves to their feet, Seihai attempts to look him in the eyes.  “I tell you ‘Yes, you should knock’, and then you go ‘you foolish cur! The king shall never knock before entering! It’s my right!’ or something like that.”
“Well, there you have it. Although wisdom initially evaded that tiny brain of yours, you’ve finally conjured up the answer to your own enquiry.”
“Hey, my brain isn’t tiny. I just can’t keep up with you sometimes.”
“If you’ve managed to fool yourself into believing that, then who am I to disagree?” Whipping out a decadent golden throne from a rippling gold portal, he places himself by Seihai’s side. “Now, I’m here to depart a word of wisdom. Listen carefully.”
‘W-Wait, he’s here to talk?! Why?!’ Utterly bemused by this turn of events, Seihai felt compelled to burst into laughter. ‘Oh shit, hold it in! Hold it in!’ Last time they laughed at the king; Gilgamesh threatened them with a thousand deaths. “Er...You want some drinks? Food?”
“Hoh...I’m glad to see that you retain enough honor to serve your king. However, the food of mongrels isn’t to-” As soon as Seihai pulled out an assortment of global snacks, Gilgamesh’s words caught in his very throat.
“Fine. Pass that one. On the right.” A look of embarrassment briefly flickered across his features, as he coughed lightly. “Don’t hesitate, mongrel! Pass it, post haste!!!”
Seihai smirked proudly at that. ‘Hehe, that’s payback for you being so damn rude! Can’t look down on my global snack collection, huh?’ 
Keeping such thoughts locked firmly within their mind, they pass Gilgamesh a vanilla twinkie. ‘How amusing...Gilgamesh, the arbiter of all pleasures; owner of all the items of the world, is a fan of snacks like twinkies...’ Seihai would most certainly make a note of this later on.
As they both settled down, munching down on an assortment of foods- Gilgamesh cleared his throat, his expression as hard as stone. “Mongrel.”
“Hm?”
“What ails you, to be avoiding a festival as grand as the Chaldea party? I’ll have you know that even I have no choice but to approve of its splendor.”
Seihai’s mind boggled at this. Was he inquiring as to their health? Lowering their head, Seihai mumbled a tiny “Well, you know...I’m just not in the mood. That’s all.”
“That’s all? I hadn’t taken you to be such a bore.”
“Well, that’s not really my problem; you know. Sometimes, I can be boring as hell, and today’s just one of those days.”
“Mongrel, Chaldea’s been renovated into a sparkling nightclub. A nightclub.” Gilgamesh placed heavy emphasis on the word ‘nightclub’. “And yet you still manage to profess that you’re ‘not in the mood’?! Whatever happened to that mongrel that wouldn’t stop dancing in the canteen the other day?” Gilgamesh looked truly offended, as if Seihai had broken a sworn covenant or something.
‘Wait, what the hell?! He caught me dancing in the canteen? FUCK!’ Seihai grimaced at this. “W-wait, Gilgamesh. How the hell did you catch me dancing?!”
Ignoring Seihai’s question, Gilgamesh continued to complain. “Don’t you understand? A night as dazzling as this may never happen again. I declare that you enjoy it to the utmost, before everything disappears.” He had an excellent point there. Life was all but fleeting, a translucent kaleidoscope of effervescent events. Who knows when all of Chaldea may breathe their very last breath?
“Okay, I’ll admit you have a pretty good point there.” He definitely did! However, Seihai was yet to be moved by his advice. “However, I don’t feel like I’m worthy enough to join...I messed up so many times during the last singularity....and it took me quite a few tries before passing the mage exam.”
“So, you’re a fool then.”
Before Seihai could leap up in outrage at this statement, Gilgamesh silenced them with a flex of his golden-plated hand. “However. Albeit being a fool, you’re a determined one; who fights for their own cause. And as the King of Heroes, I must acknowledge that such actions are actually worthy of merit. Therefore, I shall not allow you to wallow in such pathetic self-misery! Celebrate your achievements with all of your might, mongrel- and REJOICE!”
Eyes widening with awe, Seihai’s heart sung with joy at his words. Spirit roused, they gawped at him in shock. “W-what...?!”
Did he just praise them? Gilgamesh offering praise? The world must certainly be ending soon. Looking around them, to check whether they were dreaming- Seihai was completely befuddled. ‘Of all the people to come and cheer me up when I’m feeling sad...How the heck did he end up being the one to do so?!’
“Fuhahaha! You look as if you’ve transformed into a fish! How utterly amusing!” Gilgamesh’s shoulders trembled with laughter. “You heard me clearly, mongrel. Even fools such as you have inherent worth. Now go out there, and rejoice!”
“Er...well, thanks Gilgamesh. That was kind of you to say that.” To see one’s own failures as a bastion for developing success...Seihai was taken aback by Gilgamesh’s perspective on things. However, it was much appreciated. “I do like hearing your titbits of wisdom.”
“Don’t grow too accustomed to them. I shan’t hand them out willy-nilly, you know. Now, rise to your feet; so that we can descend upon the dancefloor!”
“Haha, that does actually sound like fun. Thanks again, Gilgamesh.”
“Don’t get too conceited, mongrel. I’m only offering you alms for this particular occasion.”
As Seihai chuckled at this (as Gilgamesh obliterated their bedroom door with a flying kick), the two rivals (Friends? Enemies? Who knows, really), made their way to the festival.
The End
WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. THIS WAS MUCH MORE FRIENDLY A FIC THAN EXPECTED. ALSO, I AM CERTAIN THAT MY MASTERSONA AND GILGAMESH WOULD BE LIKE ARCH ENEMIES BUT THEY ACTUALLY GOT ALONG????????
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knightsandjedis · 5 years ago
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Let the pettiness commence
Let me be frank here when stating that if the quarantine weren’t happening I would probably remain the type of blogger to just re-blog posts without commenting or making my own posts. I enjoy looking at things more than commenting what can I say? I should say thanks and welcome to all the followers I’ve gained these past few years. You all are awesome and hope you all are staying safe during these troublesome times!
Alright, I’m going from civil to petty here and I should forewarn you if you’re a fan of Sarah J. Maas and her novels you’ll prefer to stay away then listen to my rant. Just being polite and giving a heads up.
Listen, there are periods where atrocious books become a major part of trending pop culture. Eventually, the hype dies down and people can take a deep inhale of relief. Around the 2010s time-period, the hype was focused on Twilight books. No matter where you went you felt suffocated by the hyper-fixation people had on this series. I’ll be honest I was an avid Twilight lover for a period until I wised up and had to recognize these books are horrendous and having a bad influence on teens during my era. Teens were getting Aids from drinking each other’s blood literally, they were drinking someone’s blood literally. While they’re still popular main society’s attention has begun to wane.
Pop culture has an new interest in Sarah J. Maas’s series: Throne of Glass (ToG) and A Court of Thorns and Roses (ACOTAR). At one time I was part of the fan-base obsessed with her books. During a bleak period where every book I purchased ending up a dud despite strong premises; Maas’s first books, in both series, were a breath of fresh air. They had characters you found hysterical and enjoyed the story-lines (even though the storytelling was meh at times) and you couldn’t help anticipating future novels to see where the novels took these characters. Both series died for me at the books: Queen of Shadows and A Court of Mist and Fury.
These novels were my wake-up call to Maas’ manipulative storytelling patterns and her inconsistent characterizations. She completely morphs characters depending on the scenario. A noble, decent character is turned heinous to either add unnecessary drama or to make readers turn their affections towards another character Maas’ manipulates into becoming “the hero”- typically a love interest. Usually, the first-or second in TOG- love interests are noble characters with a few flaws but nothing to make readers despise them other than the fact they’re not the prettiest men in the series. Literally, readers adore the male characters that are otherworldly attractive than an average looking male who is humane and unproblematic. Problematic much? The message I’m receiving is you should fall in love with a pretty face rather than explore the person’s entire being (this includes past history, personality, characterization, etc).
People will say I’m petty because I’m annoyed Chaol and Tamlin did not remain the love interests. This is absolutely untrue. I’m annoyed Maas had to pull absolute garbage reasoning out of her ass to make the characters despicable.
Let’s start with Throne of Glass. Celaena (I refuse to call her Aelin because the name visually repulses me, it sounds like something Maas stole out of better high fantasy novels) realizes she doesn’t find Dorian compatible and finds Chaol more of an equal. Chaol has flaws but his main one seems to be he’s good-looking but only average in comparison to Dorian and Rowan- whose sex on legs apparently. Maas realizes people will deny Rowan as a love interest (after he gets into a punching match with Celaena) so she has to make Celaena despise Chaol and interact towards him with hostility despite her recognition Chaol had his reasoning's for certain events in previous novels. Then, Maas takes Chaol’s character, who is known for being awkward around women and loyal to a fault, and make him have one night stands, cheating on women, and apparently the scapegoat for everything that goes wrong because Celaena can’t own up she made mistakes. Nehemia also died to give Celaena that necessary push to go against the king but it’s entirely Chaol’s fault for Nehemia’s death since Celaena can do no wrong. Horseshit I say.
Dorian is not a match, Chaol is the bane of Celaena’s existence so Rowan is her champion. Gag. I actually liked Rowan in Heir of Fire but I found it repulsive how Celaena keeps throwing herself at him in Queen of Shadows and growing dependent on him. When she put him in a bath and started throwing her favorite shampoos in I found it to be the most awkward scene. It’s a moment someone with limited knowledge of sexual encounters would conjure up. “Let me give my love interest a bubble bath!” I’ve read these type of bath scenes in other novels but they’re more maturely done. Although I have to remember these books are written for teens. Then, they become mates. A contradicting setup because he had a mate in the past. But, no one is compatible unless they’re mates in Maas’ world. So, mates are stuck together and seem to have a servant/master relationship in certain portions of the stories. Yuck, just yuck.
Readers if you have to state someone is someone else’s mate so you’re aware they’re a thing then it’s probably not a healthy relationship since you’re staying they own that person in Maas’ world-building.
I’m going to stop while I’m ahead when writing about Rowan and Caelena because they repulse me. Buuuttt not to the same extent as Feyre and Rhysand. I absolutely despise these characters with every fiber of my being. This is one of the most unhealthiest relationships I’ve ever read. Before I jump into why they’re disgusting let me just say I love how everybody hopped on the Feyre adoration bandwagon only when she got into a relationship with Rhysand. Nobody liked her until she got.into.a.relationship.with.Rhysand. Wow!
Listen, I understand why Feyre couldn’t stay with Tamlin after what he did (ahem what Maas decided he should do). However contradictory Tamlin’s characterization was the relationship had turned unhealthy. Yetttt, no one batted an eye with Rhysand was giving Feyre date rape drugs, forcing her to give him lap dances making her sick when she came out of the haze, and her being entirely repulsed when he made-out with her. Plus, I read Rhysand as a gay or bi character when he was introduced. I think he would be a better character as a gay male seeking a friendship than their disgusting love story. He goes from giving her roofies and at least seeming like a morally gray character to Feyre’s champion. Yeah, not buying the bullshit.
I pity Tamlin’s character truly- he was butchered beyond recognition. He goes from allowing Feyre to wander to her heart’s extent- as long as she wasn’t in dangerous areas- to locking her up because he thought it made sense. He’s suddenly possessive of her in the most disgusting ways (but Rhysand isn’t possessive in the slightest even when he calls Feyre his “mate!”). All these details were added to make Rhys’ character more heroic. Rhys goes from being a somewhat tolerable character in his actions to a fucking messiah. Rhysand goes from roofie expert to whisking Feyre away for her own safety. Rhysand assists Feyre under the mountain unlike Tamlin! (Because the queen didn’t give a shit about Rhysand and he wasn’t under her radar to the extent as Tamlin). He loves reading stories with Feyre unlike Tamlin. (Hmm, Tamlin offers to teach Feyre to read which she stubbornly refuses because she’s independent but Rhysand forces her to learn and he’s romantic!). And gasp, Tamlin ended up being the one who murdered Rhysand’s family hence their animosity (hahahaha how desperate are you Maas, I mean seriously how pathetic). Feyre, just like Caelena, was forced into this relationship with another abuser painted as a hero in storytelling. Rhysand and Rowan are constructed into heroes to make their disgusting actions justifiable in comparison to Chaol and Tamlin’s ruined characters.
I’m mostly focused on the main relationships since that’s all I keep hearing about. Changing subjects briefly, Maas’ does not acknowledge PoC or LGBTQIA unless readers are pointing out lack of representation. If they’re introduced you’re guaranteed either they die to promote the white lead’s agenda or forced to become a villain. What kind of statement does that make, Maas???? Also, her world-building is beyond odd. Random characters get introduced in weird scenarios that she has to force into the story-line just for sprucing purposes (Manon and the 12 and the 12 princesses from Earth or whatever). Really, what were the purposes of these characters???? And these kingdoms are written so bad. One realm has everyone wearing Renaissance era clothing while the next realm has people dressing hipster I mean wtf?
The reason for my rant is that I needed to get it out of my system. Lately, I cannot get away from these garbage novels. I’m on my Kindle the books are recommended. I’m on Goodreads her books are recommended and keep winning Book of the Year despite better novels being on the same list. I go on Facebook someone mentions deciding to give the series a spin under quarantine. I’m on tumblr (if you’re a fan then that’s fine, enjoy what you love) and artwork keeps popping up. I love it’s typically Feyre giving Rhysand lap-dances in the earlier part of the series where she’s desolate and sicken by these moments. People are quite forgetful when they want to ignore something in order to make Rhysand babe. I wish I knew how to block anything Sarah J Maas on here because I’m trying to escape. I want to read other authors’ novels and not have Maas’ smug face pop up on my recommendation lists. (Her books are on every list on Goodreads- every freaking list!) Hopefully, when quarantine ends the hype will quiet again but I’m getting ticked off here.
Just had to get it off my chest. I’ll probably go back to quietly ignoring the recommendations and artwork but I’m having a moment here.
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heretyc · 4 years ago
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ANOTHER short list of games that i recommend giving a try because we need something to do during COVID [a lot of words and images, be careful]
I am One Bored Bitch who likes to play video games if I’m not writing fanfiction/poetry, caring for my animals or making memes. 
As much as I enjoy Outlast, this list is different compared to my other one simply because the games here don’t behave like Outlast at all. 
Access to PlaystationNow has me exploring new horizons and now I need to share my excitement. :D There will be lots of images and some spoilers, so be warned. I will try my damnedest not to reveal too much.
1. Vampyr
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This game feeds my intense love of Victorian [?] London. It has an awesome storyline, the best aesthetic, and a hot protagonist. [His sister is lowkey cute, too. All of my homosexual/lesbian/bisexual homies, rise up]
You play as Jonathan Reid,
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a vampire-turned surgeon who spends the game searching for the guy who turned him. He served in World War l until he got turned, so you know he’s a badass. 
The game was created by DONTNOD, and if you don’t know who they are, they created Life is Strange. This game behaves a bit like LIS - you have choices to make, and those choices have consequences - so it causes you to be careful and save the game before you make a decision.
What makes this game even more chaotic is that it takes place during the Influenza Epidemic [How fun! HOW IRONIC!] and the World War. The environment is also interactive; you can help the citizens around you, or feed off of them and kill them. [There are a couple of assholes, so the ‘kill’ option is so handy.]
It’s on XBOX, Steam, and PS4 [it’s free on PS4 if you use PSNow.]
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2. [You saw this coming] Until Dawn
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Ohhhh DEATHHHHHHHHH-
I’ll shut up now. But the intro is fucking amazing, you can’t tell me otherwise.
Until Dawn is a chaotic shitstorm that takes place in the Canadian mountains. That’s all the info you need.
...No, I’m kidding. But this will be long with a lot of images. There is a lot of explaining that needs to be done.
Until Dawn consists of 8 protagonists who you have to keep alive. I mean, you don’t have to, but that’s how you get the best ending.
There is Sam, one of my favourite characters,
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Josh, my second favourite,
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The Twins, Hannah [Left] and Beth [Right], sisters of Josh, 
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Mike who I thought was an asshole at first but that changes,
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Jess, the girlfriend of Mike,
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Emily, the ex of Mike and a queen, but let’s be real, she can be a total bitch,
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Matt, the boyfriend of Emily and the soft boy we all love and appreciate in this house,
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Chris, my third favourite character,
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and Ashley, who I despise [players of Until Dawn most likely know why],
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So Mike, Emily, Ashley, Jess, and Matt were in on a prank that involved Hannah and Mike, because Hannah loved Mike but he was in a relationship with Emily at the time, and it went wrong due to Hannah running out into a blizzard. 
Josh and Chris are in drunken stupors and Sam is busy scolding her friends for being dickheads, so Beth runs into the cold Canadian climate to find her sister.
They both die under weird circumstances, and the game takes place a year later. 
I warn you, and I mean this; this game is INCREDIBLY gorey and will make your jaw drop due to the amount of plot twists and jumpscares. And we thought Outlast’s jumpscares were bad? Puhleeze.
The best part of this game is that YOU BEFRIEND A WOLF!!!!
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I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. HIS NAME IS WOLFIE AND HE IS A GOOD BOY!!!!
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Unfortunately, this masterpiece is PS4 exclusive. Horrendous, I know. :(
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3. Assassins Creed Syndicate
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Another game based in Old London. Oops! Not really. This is not an Oops whatsoever.
This is the first game I played on my PlayStation 4, and it’s something I play quite a lot. 
You play as two protagonists. They are twins.
Evie, the brains of the two who plans before taking action,
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and Jacob, the lovable asshole who uses his fists in every situation possible,
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They are master assassins trying to take back London from a hipster asshole with a very stylish mustache,
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I’ve noticed that Ubisoft really hates hipsters. It’s funny.
This game will make you question your sexuality because you will love both Evie AND Jacob. It’s hard not to.
Not only that, but there is a character who is trans and a TOTAL BABE,
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I love him, you love him, my dog loves him, God loves him, Aliens love him-
[His name is Ned, please treat him with respect he is a very beneficial ally :(]
It’s on PS4, XBOX, and Windows. Yum.
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4. Life is Strange: The Awesome Adventures of Captain Spirit
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It’s not very long, but it’s a treasure that you need to experience!
You play as a BLESSED LITTLE BOY NAMED CHRIS, WHO I WANT TO SPOIL AND HUG,
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His imagination is very vivid, so you can expect to play as a superhero and find stuff to help make him a costume.
His dad is a fucking asshole, a piece of shit, a- 
[Please read on as I call his dad every insult under the sun]
It’s free on Steam. Get it here. There is a definite spoiler below because I think it’s important.
Before you play, please be warned that Chris uses his imagination to cope with losing his mother and abuse from his father. You will experience this in the game, and that’s why I felt the need to warn you. It may bring back PTSD flashbacks or disturb you in general.
As someone who was abused by their father, I 100% sympathize with Chris and used my imagination to cope with my situation too. I kinda blame my upbringing for having a vivid imagination :/ 
◼ ———————————————◼——————————————— ◼
Before you play any of these, I recommend looking at short playthroughs, or reviews before you spend your money! You’re gonna wanna spend your money on something you’re gonna play, right?
Enjoy. x
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lostgirlrewatch · 5 years ago
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1x09 - Fae Day
Written by: Jeremy Boxen
Directed by: Steve DiMarco
Original Air Date: November 14, 2010
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I’m back, bitches.
There’s like 130 people who follow this blog now, which is crazy. I don’t know why you followed, whether it’s to reblog gifsets, to read/skim the episode blog posts, or because of gay girls. But thank you. I took a long break because real life is a bitch. And also because Lost Girl episode 1x09 sucks.
My plan is to be back permanently and post on a more consistent basis. My goal is to post one episode commentary every Sunday around 5PM EST, give or take a few hours.
As I write this, I am sitting here drinking very strong coffee and eating an underwhelming Walmart blueberry muffin, having just watched 1x09.
Wow, that episode was boring. In fact, I had completely forgotten about it.
The premise is that Bo is upset by the events at the end of last episode—Vex getting away without providing any information on her mom, Lu Ann supposedly being executed—and wants to “take a break” from the Fae, which she does by going to the Dal with Kenzi for a drink, where a ton of Fae are partying. (Okay.)
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It’s a holiday called La Showshang--
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--(no, I am not looking up how it is actually spelled) where Light and Dark Fae call a truce and are allowed to fuck each other. And also they can’t fight. Then a banshee screams and predicts that someone at the party will die, and Bo decides to help out.
Does it sound stupid yet?
No? Okay, then how about this? While Bo and Dyson are off investigating, Kenzi stays behind and randomly develops a crush on this milquetoast motherfucker with no personality.
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So it turns out this guy, Sean, is the one who is predicted to die. Some drama ensues between him and his estranged brother, that is really, truly, very interesting, I assure you, it is super interesting. (It’s not.) Spoilers: the dad did it. Sean dies at the end anyway.
Now that we’ve got the plot out of the way, let’s at least talk about how this episode contributes to the overall arc. Or does it?
Last episode, Trick secretly saved Lu Ann from execution so that he could find out more information about Bo’s birth mom. He hasn’t told anyone that he did this, except Dyson (when asked). Dyson, understandably, is a bit peeved that they are still keeping Bo in the dark about “all this.” 
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What exactly is “all this,” you ask? I can’t remember if it’s been revealed in the show prior to now, but Dyson name drops an “Aife” who is on her way to town, so I think it’s safe to say that both Trick and Dyson are aware of who Bo’s birth mother is, and are deliberately keeping it from her. Ah, yes. The most important thing in her life, the thing that haunts her day in and day out, the thing that Dyson literally saw her go apeshit on Vex about and then break down crying about afterwards. They just casually know it, and aren’t telling her. Bo also thinks that Lu Ann is dead, so that’s doubly cruel. Dyson is just as guilty for keeping Bo in the dark as Trick is, but at least he has the decency to be upset about it and insist that they stop doing it.
Trust. What a wonderful, elusive thing. Hm.
Dyson and Trick are cowards and failures.
Trick is like Dollar Tree Giles. Just as much of an asshole, but with less of a personality, and less interesting and likable. Rupert Giles being an asshole works because by the time we realize what a fucking dick he is, we have grown to know him well and care about him, and his assholery is the casual, patronizing, well-meaning kind that makes him extra realistic. It hits hard. I mean, sure, I hate Giles, but I also love Giles for the character he is. Trick is just…I feel like they tried to make him the Giles of Lost Girl, and it falls flat because we have no reason to give a shit about him. He just comes across as a grumpy, neurotic old fuck who is extremely cruel to Bo (someone who is *spoilers* rather close to him) for seemingly no reason.
Dyson: How long are we gonna not tell Bo about this?
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Trick: For as long as we can.
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Great. Nice talking to you, Trick.
Dyson also calls Trick the “Blood King” in this scene, so now we know he is apparently really important.
Kenzi has another run-in with death in this episode. If you vaguely followed the trajectory of this season so far, have you noticed that Kenzi seems to have an interaction with “death,” as a concept, in every other episode? It sure feels that way.
I like that Kenzi’s reaction to finding out Sean is going to die is, “You know what? Fuck no. If you are going to die, you are going to die without regrets.” In her own wise words (or those of Ludacris), regret is fo suckas. Bitch. 
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Kenzi’s reaction to death is always rebellion, or at the very least, she is super into the idea of living life to the fullest while you still can. She gives me trauma vibes of, “Death is always around the corner, so I’m always seeking thrills and always trying to live without regrets.”
Sean dies at the end, right in her arms.
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Girl, you knew him for one day.
But it’s still awful. Kenzi has seen too much death already, and she deserves better. Unfortunately, this show is not kind to her. If you’ve seen the next few seasons, you know that this one-off situation is only the first in an ongoing trend—Kenzi’s absurdly horrendous luck with regards to her love life.
Kenzi should be, physically at least, the weakest character. She is the youngest by far. But she always takes the hardest hits.
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ohtheseboysilove · 5 years ago
Text
Out of luck. [ Ben Hardy x F!Reader]
Words : 6, 200 K +
Warnings : fluff, bit of angst
Summary : You have the most wonderful first date with Ben, wishing nothing more than seeing him again. The only problem is he never text you again after promised to.
Note :  A little fluffy break in all these angsty writing on my tumblr ;))) Hope u like my cutie pies !!
🌼Requests are open🌼☀ Masterlist ☀
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The butterflies in your belly were flapping there wings excitedly, bumping around each other due to your melting state. You were completely melting. That was the word. Ben was making you literally melt. He was so sweet, your heart beating so heavily against your chest, everything about him was practically perfect. Handsome, funny, smart and definitively a gentleman. It had been so long since a boy made a such good impression right away, it was exciting. And obviously a bit scary. You had the bad habit to get attached way too quickly before being brutally bring back to the reality. You really hoped this time this guy was serious because you did like him, a lot.
“Let me get that” The beautiful british immediately grabbed the bill from the waitress’s hands, smiling kindly at her.
“No, Ben, we can do half-half” You protested as you took your wallet from your hand bag but he was quicker, slamming notes on the table.
“My treat, love. Don’t fight me on this, I can be very stubborn” He winked at you and stood up as you did the same, he even helped you put your coat on !
You both exited the restaurant, sharing nervous but flustered glances to each other. It was the famous moment did he like the date like I did ? Or was he just polite ?
“Thanks for paying tonight” You smiled softly as you slowly walked on the pavement, hands bumping against each other, the two of you too timid to do the first step. “But I pay the next time” You blurbed out without thinking.
When a grinned broke on his face, your eyes widened as you processed your words, chewing nervously your bottom lip.
“So you want us to have a second date ?” His dimples were popping as he smiled, rather amused by your sudden red cheeks.
“Hum, I– I mean...if you want to–“ You ate half of your words, feeling incredibly dumb under his deep green eyes. “But...it’s alright– we don’t have to...hum see each other again...if you don’t want” You swallowed thickly when you managed to finally spit your answer, biting your nails as you were shitting yourself.
“I’m just teasing love. Of course I want to see you again” The blond stopped walking and grabbed your hand, squeezed it gently. His bright gaze looking sweetly at you. “I spent a really really good evening. I think you’re amazing. And pretty. Very pretty if I may had” Your heart fluttered strongly, drowning in these adorable compliments. He definitely know how to charm a lady.
“Oh, thank you Ben, you’re...really pretty too. I mean handsome!” You cleared your throat under the embarrassment you was creeping on you. How could be always so awkward ? “You’re really handsome too” You added and felt yourself blushed harder at Ben’s staring.
“You’re so bloody adorable” The blond almost giggled, shaking lightly his head. “Can I walk you home ? Don’t want to leave you right now” The british murmured, it was now his turn to have little patches of pink on his cheeks.
“I would love that” You swallowed back a girly giggle when he interlaced his fingers with yours, a wide smile painting on your features. God, you were already crushing too hard on this man.
The walk back to your flat was too short for your taste, a little fifteen minutes filled with laugh, awkward anecdotes and flirty glances. It was around eleven, the night had already coated London’s streets and you felt like these romantic, cheesy movies when you and Ben stopped at the stairs of you flat, looking nervously at each other.
Kiss me! Kiss me! Kiss me! Your mind was screaming silently to Ben, you were too shy to do it first. He was so perfect and you were so...you, it was a bit hard to believe he was really into you. The british probably read in your eyes how much you were hoping he would kiss you or maybe it was the way your gaze kept flicking between his lips to his eyes. It wasn’t your fault, there were incredibly inviting, plump and well-shaped with a light shade of pink. You were sure he was a good kisser, an amazing one, this was–
“Are you with me, love ?” You blinked confusedly at he chuckled gently, biting his bottom lip.
“Sorry I zone out for a second” You confessed with a crimson face. What a creep.
“What were you thinking about ?” Ben asked as he tilted his head to the right side, his thumb rubbing softly on the skin of your hand. His touch was smooth and warm. God you hoped he would kiss you.
“Hum, I– I was thinking about Frankie!” You panicked and blurbed the first thing which came in your mind, slapping mentally yourself.
“You were thinking about my dog ?” He repeated with an arched eyebrow, a confused smile hanging on his pretty face.
“Yeah, I mean she was so cute on the pictures you show me, I can’t wait to meet her” You giggled awkwardly, tucking hairs behind your ears and internally screaming idiot idiot idiot! “God, I’m sorry, I sound so weird! I...so sorry. I don’t know why I said that, I panicked” You added in a flustered tone, he was making too nervous for your own good.
At your total surprise, Ben didn’t looked strangely at you or awkwardly but instead he laughed, pushing you against his chest, his head falling on yours.
“God (Y/N), I swear you need to stop being so bloody cute” You could feel his chest vibrating with chuckles, your hands still interlocked. “You’re too adorable” He let go of your hands and before you could be disappointed from the loss of contact, his large palm went cradling your burning cheeks, making you shivered at the warm and intimate touch. “Bloody adorable. And so pretty. And I really want to kiss you right now, if it’s okay with you” The british whispered the last sentence as you eyes fluttered at the tenderness of the moment. Blood was rushing at your temples and heart beating so quickly.
“Kiss me please” You practically whined, feeling totally overwhelmed by the intensity of his gaze. And these perfect lips teasing you.
The blond chuckled at your eagerness before brushing so softly his mouth over that you barely felt it. Bloody cute he murmured against you and dived back on your lips, and this time he gave a real kiss and you definitively felt like in a movie. If it was starting to rain in next minute, you would certainly pinched yourself to be sure you weren’t dreaming.
And there you were, melting again. Melting again his soft, delicious lips perfectly fitting with yours, kissing you over and over again. Your hands naturally found his waist as his own were still holding delicately your face. He stopped when you were both panting, eyes glistering with eagerness and happiness, your heart was bursting with love right now. Ben didn’t say anything and slid his fingers on your hips before bringing your closer, his pillowed lips finding yours in an electrifying way. Your hands travelled on his back, gently rubbed on his broad shoulders before terminating there exploration on his neck, linking behind it. His hot tongue gently grazed on your lower lips, asking for permission and – permission immediately granted – it was an amazing kisser. Not to much tongue or saliva but just the right mix between a hot, deep kiss and still keeping his softness, not throwing a show in the middle of the street.
“Woah” You couldn’t contain yourself when you broke the kiss, taking a step back to have complete look over the blond. “Hum, that was amazing” You murmured with a lovestruck gaze, head a bit dizzy from the overwhelming feeling of joy flooding on you.
He ran a tongue on his lips and you repressed a moan at the sight, this was incredibly hot.
“Agreed. Absolutely amazing” He nodded, his hands tightening around your waist, both of you lost into your gazes. “You’re amazing” He bumped his nose with yours. “Bloody amazing. I can’t wait to see you again” He gently nipped at your bottom lip.
“Me too Ben” you whispered back, your heart feeling heavy at the thought of him going back to his place. You wanted to stay in his arms forever. And once again, if you were in a movie, it was the perfect timing to invite him over for a last drink. Which would end up – ninety percent of chance – with the romantic interest sleeping with the main character. But here the thing, that not something you were comfortable with, usually you needed to know the person better before being intimately with this person. The trust, it was essential for you and invited a man you only saw two times in your life wasn’t in your habit, not at all. But when you looked at him, his sweet smile waiting for you to say these few words, your heart was beating so quickly but not with nervousness...just excitement. You wanted it, so much. So you did it. You pronounced these six words the blond was dying to hear from your mouth. “Would...hum, would you like to come in ?” You blurbed out, wishing he wouldn’t turn you back.
But of course he didn’t. His face litted up right away and shook his head, eagerness rushing through his blood.
“God yes” You both giggled, pink covering your cheeks and gazes sparkling with fondness and something else, much more powerful. Lust. He wanted you, it was all over his eyes, pupils slightly dilated as his large hands were still on your hips, fingers pushing into your exposed flesh. You wanted him as equally.
**
The two glasses of red wine were long forgotten on the coffee table, both of you too busy with each other, exploring bodies with soft, yet hungry touches. Ben was buried between your bare legs, lips alternating between kisses and nibbling on your sensitive flesh as his two of his fingers were inside you, stretching your walls deliciously.
“Oh! Oh! My god!” You squeaked in a horrendous high-pitched voice when Ben’s fingers hit that spot, the one which made your toes curled and your belly twisted in pleasure. Then his pillowed lips found your clit, sucking and twirling his tongue on it and you were done. You came in a strangle scream, against the blond’s thirsty mouth, lapping every drop of your juice until you fell flat on your sofa, your sweaty chest – only covered with this so innocent little white bra – panting as you slowly emerged back from our high. “Shit Ben, was so good” You breathed loudly, a giddy smile floating on your radiant face.
“You taste absolutely delicious, darling. Just like I know you would” His lips were on yours, kissing lazily each other, hands sneaking on your bare arse, pitching it cheekily. “I want you so bad (Y/N), so badly” His raspy voice, coated with need, was murmuring against your mouth, his hips slowly thrusting against your bare center as his hard covered cock was teasing you.
“I want you too, Ben. Want you to feel you inside me” You replied with a moan at the delicious friction was making the knot coming back in your lower belly. “You’re so beautiful” Your nails were gently grazing on his bare chest, your eyes roaming every inch of his magnificent muscles before ending on his perfect features, without a doubt you favourite part to admire.
He chuckled softly at your words, hand rubbing the globe of your ass. “Did you see yourself, love ? You’re gorgeous, fucking hot. Look at these thigh and this pretty pussy” He pressed a simple kiss on it, making you shivered. “So sexy”
So sexy. Ben called you fucking hot and so sexy. The bubbles of pleasure in your lower body were popping as the words sunk into your mind. Not bloody cute or too adorable like he was calling you earlier, which you had love for sure. But being called cute as being half-naked could have been a bit insulting. Depressing ever.
“Do you have a condom ?” He winked playfully and brushing his mouth on your jaw before standing up, only wearing his – now way too tight blue navy underwear. A beautiful sight. He shook the precious square protection and his eyes fell on your ass when you started walking away, motioning him to follow you. Which he did. Eagerly.
Ben wrapped his arms around your back, hands barely grazing on the inside of your thighs and his plump, warm lips found your neck, kissing and biting on the flesh. You let your head fell on his shoulder, your ass pressing strongly against his crotch, his dick poking on your lower back. When you couldn’t take anymore of this teasing, you turned around and grabbed his hand, bringing him with you on your bed. He fell on you, careful to not crushing you and your eager fingers immediately tugged on his waistband, freeing his painfully hard cock. You absent-mindedly bit your lips at the sight, red and leaking. All of this, just for you. And because of you.
“You sure you want that ?” His voice was soft, his eyes searching in your pupils any hesitation. But he didn’t find any. Only an inch of nervousness. “Don’t need to be nervous with me, love” He kissed you, not hungrily like previously but with an adorable sweetness, trying to calm your nerves.
“I want you, Ben. I’m just...nervous because it’s the first time I do something like that and, yeah, it’s making me excited and anxious at the same time” You rambled, fingers tracing the broad muscles of his right shoulder.
“You...you’re a virgin ?” The blond asked with a surprised voice, his green eyes rounds and confused.
You furrowed your brows and thought about what you just said. And yes indeed, it was pretty confusing. You giggled awkwardly.
“Oh my god, no ! That’s not what I meant, I’m not a virgin. Not at all !” You exclaimed, shaking your head with burning cheeks. Then you blushed even more, fuck, now he was probably thinking you were some kind of cheap whore, throwing yourself at every men you saw. “Shit, I’m not saying I sleep with all the country either ! God, I’m so awkward, I’m sorry”
You were crimson, feeling utterly stupid and a real cockblocker this moment. You should have kept your mouth shut instead of ruining the mood with your clumsiness.
“Love, relax, alright ? Don’t need to apologise for anything” Ben chuckled gently. “Tell me what bothering you”
“Nothing, it’s just the first time I’m sleeping with someone on a first date” You confessed and felt like a poor little girl, making a fuss of nothing. “I know it’s not a big deal but I usually wait longer and so I feel a bit nervous, I don’t want to regret it. If you don’t call me back after or something” You mumbled and rambled, eyes looking everywhere except in Ben’s direction. You were so embarrassed.
“Hey, look at me” His finger grabbed your chin and you said as he did, feeling vulnerable under his intense gaze. The fact you were naked only added more shyness on you. “I’m not forcing you into anything. If you want us to wait, we will. I’m not gonna sleep with you then disappeared, I’m not this kind of guy. I’m honest, if I want a one-night-stand, I would have tell you. But I don’t. I want to see you again, doesn’t matter if we have sex or not tonight”
You nodded timidly. Where did you found such a perfect gentleman ? You thought it was an extinct species.
“I really, really want you Ben” You replied before snapping the condom from his hands. You tear the wrapping and checked with Ben if he was okay with that before you rolled down the condom on his hard length, earning delicious little grunts from the gesture.
“Fuck, (Y/N), you driving me crazy” Ben groaned when you put your legs opened, inviting him closer to you. He grabbed his dick and slowly rubbed the tip against your wet folds, your breathing increasing at the sweet torture.
The blond moved his hips and gradually entered into you, both of you cursing and moaning at the feeling. God, it felt so good.
**
The next moments were spent with hungry and eager touches, your fingers lost into his blond locks, legs wrapped tightly around his waist.
His thumb circling on your throbbing clit, making you saw starts.
His hips snapping against yours, slowly then quickly, fastening the pace at your pleading cries.
His delicious, pillowed lips kissing every inch of your exposed breasts, nibbling at your tits, tongue swirling around, making your back arched.
You walls involuntarily clenching around him when he hit the sweet spots he touched earlier with his fingers, giving you even more pleasure with his length into you this time.
Your bodies were interlaced together, both of you shivering, the heavy atmosphere smelling sex and sweat. A mixing you never thought you could enjoy that much.
There were grunts and moans escaping your throats. Whines, cries and whimpers were too, especially when you were right on the edge. Pleading and begging echoing through the bedroom as Ben worshipped every part of your body.
You kissed. So many times. Hotly and messily. Sloppily and deeply. Tongues brushing around each other until your out of breath. Love-bits left on his strong jaw before licking at the pretty bruise.
When you both came, you were panting but smiling dizzily, still recovering from the high you both reached. You didn’t regret it at all.
**
“I have to go” Ben whispered as he pressed a soft kiss on your forehead, smiling at your sleepy face.
“Call me hum ?” You replied with a grin as he winked at you and left the room, murmuring a I will.
He had to go back at his place at an indecent early hours in the morning, to prepare himself for an important meeting during the same day. You were a bit frustrated to see him left so soon but you would see him another day, hopefully this week.
**
You were eating lunch in an old pub with one of your closest friend Tina, eager to tell her about your date night with the beautiful British. Okay you maybe kept under silence the fact that you slept with him. You loved your friend to death but she was a bit pessimistic and you didn’t need her to freak out and made you doubt too.
“Oh I swear Tina, he is such a sweetheart! And he was so funny and easy-going ya know ? I feel like I know him since forever” You gushed with dreamy eyes, chewing at a piece of bread.
“Well someone seems really into this guy” She gave you a warning look, taking a mouthful of her fish and chips.
You rolled your eyes at her reaction. "I know what you’re thinking but I swear he’s a good guy” You smiled softly at the thought of the cute face of Ben. "I’m not doing the same mistake twice okay ? I know he likes me too”
You had the bad habit to get yourself attached to quickly, friendly and romantically speaking and often ended disappointed. But this time you were sure Ben wasn’t taking advantage of you, you were a nice girl but not stupid.
“I’m happy for you (Y/N) but I’m also worried, I don’t want to see you hurt again” Tina smiled gently and took a sip of her tap water as you nodded, appreciating her protective behaviour over you. She saw you crying over men too many times. “Did he text you yet ?”
“Nop. But he told me he have some busy days coming so it’s alright” You replied with a shrug. “He will text me soon”
**
But he didn’t. Your date had been on the Sunday night and now it was Wednesday evening and still nothing. You were angry and nervous. And hugely disappointed. You knew he would be busy at work but a simple text wasn’t too much to ask.
You were mopping around in your flat, wondering if you should text him first. You did really like him.
“Why do you think Flynn ? Should I text him ?” Your black cat opened an eyes at the sound of his name — napping on the dinner table rather than in his bed — and let out of yawn before buried back his head under his paws, ignoring you royally. “Yeah you’re right. Let’s give him a last shot”
You pulled off your phone and searched for his contact name. Your fingers nervously drumming on the sofa, thinking about what you would say. You didn’t want to so sound to eager or bitter about the fact that he had been ghosting you for the past three days. But you didn’t want him to think you weren’t interested at all. You needed the perfect mix between that. You typed and deleted about twenty times before sending your text, heart beating awfully quickly about your ribs cage.
(Y/N) : Hey Ben, hope everything is okay at works. I was wondering if you were free Friday night for a drink ?
You were rather proud of your — casual but polite — text. Now you just needed to wait for his answer.
**
Which never came. You were livid. It was Friday night and you were at your place, cursing about Ben to your poor cat. You felt so fucking naive, he fucked you and now he was ignoring you, he already had what he wanted. How typical coming from a man. You were supposed to go out with your friends tonight, in your usual and favourite pub but that where you had your date with Ben…the thought of maybe seeing him chatting other girls made your stomach churned. What a fool you had been, once again.
“Nah, sorry I’m feeling a bit sick. Maybe next weekend ?” You lied to your friend on the phone and cancelled every plans for the weekend. You were just feeling dumb and incredibly naive. Not in a mood to go out.
**
On Wednesday lunch, you were meeting with Tina in the new salad bar. You joined her at her table and fell on the seat with a defeated face.
“You were right” You murmured, your eyes staring blankly at the menu. “Why I always go for the fuck boys and the assholes ?”
“He didn’t text you back ?” You shook your head and rested it in your head, elbow propped on the table. "What a wanker” She sighed and cursed under her breath.
“I was so sure this time Tina ! He was so nice and all” You grunted in your hands, cheeks reddening at the feeling of shame. Ben probably had a good laugh when you made him promise to call you back.
“I know hun, men are really in pretending. Everything to sleep with a girl they want to. They’re pathetic, selfish and stupid creature” You chuckled bitterly at her words.
“I…I slept with him after our date” You blurbed out, it was even worse to admit. You were that girl who childishly thought after sleeping with your date, he would really call you back.
“You what ?” Tina’s eyes were rounds and shocked. But she wasn’t judging you, she had a fair share to first-date-shag too. She was just really surprise because like you said to Ben, it wasn’t something you did, ever.
“Yeah, (Y/N) finally trust a man enough to fuck with him on the first night and he never called her back, I’m a joke” You sighed bitterly. "I hate men”
“Me too, hun, me too”
**
“That’s it (Y/N), you’re coming with me tonight” You were buried under your cover, the new season of Stranger Things playing on your laptop. “We’re going to our pub and if you see Ben, then you could tell him to go fuck himself” Tina threw the cover away, making you whined pathetically.
“I watching something, can’t go out” You contested with a pout.
The truth was, you were feeling a bit — a lot — insecure after Ben ghosting on you. The date went so well, the sex even better, great alchemy between the two of you, so why did he never called you back ? It made you feel awkward and ashamed, saying he liked you then dumbed you like a dirty sock. Naive little (Y/N).
“Come on, jump in the shower. You shouldn’t watch that show, these kids have a better love life than the both of us” You threw her a pillow and reluctantly walked to your bathroom.
You needed to get over it. Alright, a boy lied to you in order to have sex with you and you stupidly believed him, and what ? You weren’t the first to fall in the trap and certainly not the last one. You will go out for a drink with your friends and have fun. And Ben could go fuck himself.
**
You were wearing your pale pink dress, it was really nice to wear because of the thin garnishment and it was falling above the knees with simple shoulders straps. You felt cute, not hot or sexy but simply cute. And that was just what you wanted. Not an inch of flirting tonight, you were out with your girlfriends and were strongly decided to not speak to a word or gave a glance to any man inside this pub, they were all devilish. Okay, maybe an exception for the barman because you would definitely need alcohol tonight.
You entered the pub with your three other friends around six in the afternoon and it was already difficult to find a good spot. You managed to get a booth for the four of you and you immediately felt better to be outside. You already gave to much attention to Ben, mopping about him for way too long.
"I’m gonna order our drinks, girls ?” Stacy asked as she stood up, asking silently your orders.
Everyone answered beers expect you.
“Sex on the beach hum ? Feeling frisky tonight (Y/N) ?” She winked at you.
“Just need to relax and have some fun after an exhausting week of boring work” You replied, trying your best to sound casual. The last three weeks had been spent thinking about Ben and why he never called back but that was your ashamed little secret. Only Tina was aware of it.
You chatted for a good thirty minutes, sipping your cocktail and cackling at your friends’ stories before the need to pee was to urgent to just ignore it. After doing your business, you washed your hands and exited the bathroom, drying your hands on your dress. You stopped at the pub and ordered another cocktail, humming quietly at the song playing by the band.
“Hi (Y/N)” You turned your head quickly, feeling cheeks burning with anger. No fucking way. “Listen, I know what you’re thinking but–“
You didn’t let him finish and threw your drink at his face as soon the barman slid it in front of you. The blond gasped in surprise at the coldness of the drink then wiped away the alcohol from his eyes.
“Asshole” You spat before waving at the bar for another drink, doing your best to ignore the blond at your side.
“(Y/N), I’m sorry but I swear it’s not like its look like !” Ben grabbed some napkin some the counter and patted them on his soaking face and tee-shirt. “Let me explain, please !”
“You’re fucking funny. So you didn’t get in my pants and never called me after ? Telling me specifically that you would call me ?” You groaned without looking at him, you were angry and feeling humiliated. Why he was even talking to you.
“Yes but–“
“Save it Ben. You’re an asshole who can’t even have the balls to tell a girl he just want a one-night-stand, it’s so easier to lie and promise thing. It worked with me” You cut him bitterly.
You read somewhere that men regretted the girls they didn’t sleep with but woman regretted boys they slept with. It was feeling absolutely so relating right now.
“I wanted to call you ! I wanted so badly !” He replied with desperation, feeling you slipping between his fingers.
“Why didn’t you then ?” You asked with an angry tone, arms crossed and death stare on him. “Find someone else to fuck ?”
“Jesus, no ! I broke my phone, okay ?” He dug into his pocket and took at his phone, his sticky digits – from your cocktail – were leaving print of the black screen. “Here, see ? New phone !” You glance at the phone and humphed sarcastically, not really convinced by the trick. You didn’t remember which iPhone he had during your date so honestly it didn’t change anything to your pissed-off mood.
“Great for you” You shrugged as you slid a note to the barman, taking your drink in your hand, ready to go back to your table.
“(Y/N), I swear I’m not lying ! I really like you, really really like you !” He grabbed your forearm and made you puppy-eyes, making your heart cracked up for a quick second. “Let me explain, please. I felt horrible for the past three weeks, thinking about you and how mad you probably were about me. I didn’t plan to ghost you after sleeping with you, I’m not like that” These big greenish eyes were sweating with sincerity and it made you doubted for a moment.
“You got five minutes” You moved his hand away from your arm and lay against the counter, sipping your cocktail.
“Okay, when I left your flat monday morning, I went home and I dropped my phone in the fish tank of my little nephew” The blond quickly explained, his face flushed with pink. “I know, it sound like a fucking lie but it’s not ! My sister went on holiday and I pet-siting the family gold fish, I was feeding him and answering a work e-mail at the same time and it just...slid off my hands, right into the water” He chewed nervously his lips, his pretty eyelashes fluttering against his cheeks, desperate to make you believe him.
You shifted uncomfortably, he seemed sincere but how could you be sure of that ?
“And I couldn’t tell you because your number was on the phone ! I went to the phone shop but I couldn’t get back any numbers so I was screw. And I couldn’t remember where you lived, I felt so dumb but every building look the same and I didn’t know if yours was the 25A or 52A” Ben gave a timid smile, rubbing his neck in nervous gesture.
“It’s 140B” You commented with an amused grin, his face falling as he cursed loudly.
“Shit. I wasn’t close at all” His large palm found his forehead as he shook his head, murmuring about how stupid he was. “But I really wanted to see again ya know ? And the only thing I knew for sure that this pub was your favourite, so I came back here after work for the past three weeks, until I find you. Tonight.” You widened your eyes at his confession and his neck went crimson. “God, that sound a bit creepy, sorry” He added with awkward chuckle.
“You...you’re really did that ?” Now it was your cheeks which went pink. If that story was true, it was certainly flattering.
“Yes, I did ! You can ask the barman, he was worried to see me here every night. He even gave me a tract for Alcoholic Anonymous meeting” Ben replied eagerly, relief rolling on him as you weren’t not so defensive anymore. You hid a giggle behind your hand and looked at the barman, wondering if it was true or if you were just being naive. Ben caught your questioning gaze and called the barman. “Hey man, can you tell this pretty girl here, that I was there every night during the past three weeks ?”
“He is not lying, I found that a bit weird because I never saw him here and suddenly, he was there every nights the pub was opened. Then he told me it was about a girl and it wasn’t surprising anymore” The ginger man shrugged and went back to his work as Ben thanked him with a satisfied smile.
“See ? I was really hoping you would come back here” He said with a low voice, the atmosphere between the two of you had change at the revelation. Butterflies going crazy in your belly as you realised all of this story was just a big misunderstanding. “I am so sorry, I never planned to make you feel like I just used you for sex. I’m so glad you came here tonight and gave me a chance to explain” You curled your lips into a loving smile, he was so sweet. God, you were so relieved to hear that.
“I’m sorry for the drink” You said, your eyes looking at the big stain on his white tee-shirt. “And for the not really nice things I said to you earlier” Your cheeks flushed and Ben shook his head, bottom lip trapped between his pearly white teeth.
“Nah, it’s okay, I deserved it. I mean, that’s a normal reaction for what you thought I did to you” Both of your hands were on the counter, few millimetre away from each other, craving for some touches.  His pads carefully brushed over your fingers, testing the water and you immediately interlaced them together, giving a little smile. “Can you give me another chance ?” The blond murmured with hope.
“Okay” You replied simply, heart bursting with joy. “I’m sorry I already bitched about you to my friends” You added with a giggle, both of you could feel the nasty glances from your friends.
“I guessed you did, yes. I’m gonna leave you with your friends before they bit my head off” He handed you his phone and you typed your number for the second time, hoping this time was the last one. “Can I see you tomorrow ?” His voice was nervous and hopeful, kicking the nest of butterflies in your stomach. “And no sex, I want to prove you that I’m not seeing you only for that. I mean, it’s definitively a bonus but if you want for us to wait six months before going back at it, I’m totally in, I don’t care”
You melted at his adorable face, flushed and stressed, his thumb rubbed on the flesh of your hand absent-mindedly. You chuckled and slid your free hand on his face, caressing his cheek softly. You bowed your head and gave him a kiss on the lips. He seemed surprise but didn’t think twice before kissing you back, his mouth smiling widely against yours, in a long but soft embrace.
“We don’t have to wait six months Ben” He breathed an oh thanks god, making you cackled. “What do you have in mind for tomorrow ?” You hand fell on his shoulder, rubbing it lazily.
“You could come with me and Frankie, we planned to have a little picnic in Richmond park, maybe a nap and some tanning. Oh, and of course, barking and running behind every ducks from the lake” You nodded with a grin. “If I remember correctly, you were pretty eager to meet my little girl, weren’t you ?” He teased you about the stupid comment you made when he was about to kiss you at your first date.
“Oh shut up” You slapped lightly his chest and your heart buzzed at his irresistible laugh. “If you drop the teasing about this awkward memory, I would to come with you and Frankie tomorrow”
“Everything you want, love” Love. The come back of the pet name made you pinched your lips harshly, keeping for yourself the giddy smile menacing to appear on your face.
“It’s a date then” You murmured and when he pressed his lips back on yours, a sweet sigh escaped your parted mouth, savouring his delicious taste. “Text me when do you want us to meet, okay ?” You squeezed his hands and walked back to your friends as he exited the pub, both of you sharing a last loving gaze.
“Girl, what was that ! Who is that hot guy ? Was it the one who didn’t call you back ? You kissed him ! Girl ! ” You friends harassed you at the very second you came back at the table but you didn’t mind, a woozy grin was floating on your features.
A little half and hour later, you felt your phone vibrated in your pocket. Ben. You bit your lower lip with excitement.
Ben : 11h30 tomorrow ? Would it work for you ?
Before you could type an answer, a second text appeared on your screen.
Ben : Ben sent you a picture.
It was a photo of his fridge and stuck with a magnet was a little post-it. On it was wrote (Y/N) : 07818******
Ben : Just in case something happened to my phone before tomorrow morning...don’t want to lose you again. Can’t wait to see you xx
You let an excited and girly scream of joy leaving your mouth, belly bubbling with delight and happiness, earning a surprise glance from your friends.
“God, he is such a sweetheart !”
**
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thememcry · 5 years ago
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THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.
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fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.
My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent ( potentially ) / fandomless
Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO. 
Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.
Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK. (apparently there are youtube comments circulating about how boring or weak aerith is. if an explanation needs be provided for how strong of a woman, character, and fighter she is in her own regard then the point of the character is missed entirely.)
Are they underrated?  YES / NO.
Were they relevant to the main story?  YES / NO.
Were they relevant to the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.
Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO.  (the big baddies know of her, the little baddies know to look for her and the heroes just learned of why she’s important).
How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.
How strictly do you follow canon?
      it depends entirely on the person / character i’m writing and what verse they’re in. when someone approaches me and doesn’t specify a verse i give them main verse (ff7r) and follow canon as closely as i’d like. but most of my threads diverge from canon for exploration or other purposes. i’m not concerned with how close to canon my aerith is ------obviously i’d like people to hear her voice when i have her speak, or see her performing the actions i have her commit to but i’d also like this interpretation to be my own. so when someone reads a piece of my writing they say oh yes, that’s kay’s aerith definitely.
SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutual.  
      i could make an entire post about all of the things i love about aerith gainsborough on its own, so i’ll try not to let this be too rambly.
      she is such a three-dimensional character and she always has been. people expect just to meet the damsel in distress, to rely on cloud and company to help her out at every twist and turn. square even did a good job selling her appearance: soft pinks, gentle features, and when she was given a voice actor the first few times they always went the route of someone who had a lighter lilt. to the first glance she is very much all of those things. except it’s not all she is.
      aerith wears masks to cover the horrendous things that happened to her as a child: experimentation, the shocking loss of her mother after escaping it, crushing loneliness, an awareness that she was different and nobody around who understood the properties of that difference to explain it to her in a way that didn’t terrify her. she heard the planet, could tell when people passed away and rejoined the lifestream, surrounded by all of these voices yet so fucking alone. and did she let it make her bitter? did she become angry or cold, jaded or cruel? no. aerith is kind and giving without being too self-sacrificing and without making her boring. she’s not as innocent as people are made to believe.
      look at her first interactions with cloud. she flirts mercilessly with him, and then you discover she did it to zack, too. she’s not afraid to express herself in any fashion and she’s unapologetic about how forward and positive she is. despite all of the shitty things that happened to her, she’s still all of these great things. she’s scrappy, she can be a brat (ask the turks!) and she blooms under the cover of oppression that she lives. sure, she’s in a beautiful house with a loving mother figure but she’s in the slums and she’s being watched constantly by some part of the company that wants to see her dissected or worse.
      and she’s divine. no, literally. of course it takes her death for the realization of that divinity to really be understood by the fan base and even by her own party, but once aerith dies she becomes an actual deity. it’s sad that you don’t get her in your party any more but it’s obvious how much she affected everyone she worked with (and even those she didn’t). they spend the rest of the game avenging her, they spend the rest of the game explaining their grief over her loss, promising her death won’t be in vain. and once that’s done? there’s an entire movie where cloud deals with his grief over everything, but mainly his self-appointed guilt over her death. as if he could have changed it? i mentioned to @seraphicwiing​ in a conversation (an au one) about sephiroth and aerith ------he didn’t kill or break her. he gifted her divinity.
      so this sweet flower girl goes from a first appearance damsel in distress to an actual conduit of the planet, watching over her friends and everyone else from the spiritual plane of it. controlling the lifestream itself to rise up and crush back meteor.
      if you don’t like her by this point, it’s a lost cause. honestly, just go play pacman or something.
Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  
      maybe strong female leads aren’t your cup of tea? perhaps you really wanted aerith to maintain her softness and have none of the bite or edge that i argue make her interesting?
      some people want a strong woman to be something like paine in ffx-2, or lightning in ffxiii, or even lulu in ffx itself ... dark and perhaps a bit brooding, angry with someone or something. they can be gentle but they’re mostly a razor sharp edge threatening to slice anyone who tries to get close to them. aerith is arguably a hot take on the stronger female leads ... even compared to tifa. you don’t doubt that a woman who fights with her fists is a tough, bad bitch ... but aerith isn’t physically strong. she’s the image of a princess honestly and that’s just not what some people want to see or deal with.
      arguably her personality can come off a bit strong. she’s snarky and, as i said, a tease. she can be bratty from time to time and that can absolutely be read as irritating, especially to someone whose looking for negative personality traits to focus on at a first glance.
      and a lot of people just see her as a love interest to cloud. and she is, i won’t deny that. it’s been further addressed in the remake with her dream sequence that cloud absolutely has feelings for her. it dredges up the age-old argument from 1997 of: tifa or aerith. why does it have to be or? why can’t he love them both in different ways? or the same way? it’s not like aerith has a lot of time to be the love interest, anyway. we all know how disc 1 ended, by this point.
      perhaps people see her end-game divinity as a deus-ex mechanic. sure, it kind of it. but the game never hid its intentions of why aerith was there. she was always special, we just didn’t know how. she always had holy, we just didn’t know what it meant at the time. but it does seem a bit convenient that right as the meteor is going to crush midgar ------here comes the lifestream, holding it back so holy can stop it! wow, amazing! darn that aerith and her connection to the planet. how awful. maybe cloud could have just braver’d it.
What inspired you to rp your muse?  
      i love her. it’s just that simple. she’s so complex and so different from other characters i tend to gravitate toward. she has a darkness but she’s good, genuinely. i usually go for people who are deeply seeded in some kind of trauma, or are just generally a piece of shit. and aerith certainly has her trauma, but she’s risen above it. she chooses to live her life as much as she can before the ultimate doom clock ticks to 0, you know?
      i admire her beauty. not just her physical beauty (and she is), but the beauty of her as a person. i wish i could be as endlessly positive as she is, even faced against such awful odds. i wish i could be the kind of person who surrounds themselves with people who love them, despite their flaws. but i am very much the opposite of aerith.
      i consider myself endlessly lucky to be a mouthpiece of some kind of version of her. this is a character i’ve had a connection to since i was like, 7 or 9 (and i’m 30 now). the very fact that i get to log in every day and express some form of this wonderful character keeps me connected to her. she has a loud voice in my head, and i think she always had. i think that remake just re-lit the flame for her.
      i wrote her a long time ago, during myspace rp days. but we all know how myspace ended. so i choose to write her now because it feels right. and i really do enjoy having someone who shines so brightly in my head.
What keeps your inspiration going?  
      the same as everyone else, i think: music, clips of the character, art of her ... but mostly? my writing partners. i wouldn’t be anywhere without the people in this site who come to me every day with an interest in my interpretation of aerith. i never expected so many lovely humans to want to see what i can do with her. but i have people dm’ing me on discord every day with ideas or thoughts, with musings or what-if’s ... and it really just keeps this muse so alive for me.
      even though i have a backlog of drafts and inbox things to answer, i can know that they will get done ... it’s just up to me as a human to write things out.
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Some more personal questions for the mun.
Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.
Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO. 
Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO.
Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO.  (i’d prefer to write out a reply to a solo drabble).
Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day? YES / NO. 
Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO. 
Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO.
Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO.
Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?
      in the proper context. i don’t want someone coming on here and telling me i play aerith wrong because it’s not what she would do canon. that’s cool, i don’t write her strictly canon. but if i’m having doubts and i ask for the feedback, i’m open to it.
Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  
      always. i am 100% always accepting development questions.
If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  
      nope. i don’t care if you agree with my headcanons or not. i’m sure there are people who don’t like that i have a ship with a sephiroth, or a reeve, or that i’ve had her mess around with rufus or biggs. i’m sure there are people who despise the way i make her speak to people ... and that’s fine. they’re allowed to. but this is my interpretation of aerith and so far i’m loving everything that i’ve gotten to do with her. especially those things that include character building with others.
If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?
      they’re allowed to disagree. they’re also not beholden to follow me. i won’t be upset if they unfollow me. it’s their comfort, after all. and i’d rather spend time on here enjoying myself than either having someone voice their dislike of my interpretation or get vocal about how they’re uncomfortable.
If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  
      people have really hated aerith since 1997. they’re allowed to have their silly opinions of her. and i’m allowed not to entertain them.
Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  
      please do. i’m human and i make mistakes. i’d love to fix them.
Do you think you are easy going as a mun?  
      yes, but i’ve had people mention that i seem a little unapproachable. please approach me. if you want to write with me let me know. if you want to chat ooc with me talk to me. i promise i’m an absolute dimwit on my side of the screen. i’m spacy but i try to be as nice and welcoming as possible. somehow i’ve conned a few friends out of this rpc already with my idiocy, so please please please come chat with me.
That’s about it, congrats for filling out!
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airgetlamhh · 4 years ago
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I think lostbelt 3 is very overated.But Hating every second of it and qin being the worst characther in the game seem a bit much
I mean, IMO Lostbelt 3 is very poorly written and kinda coasts off the Urobuchi hype. 
Spoilers under the cut.
The main romance that’s supposed to sell it is non-existent, there’s no thought given to anything beyond how to make the people it wants to look cool look cool, it is downright obsessed with making sure we understand now noble and cool and incredible Qin is and in between all that just fails to make sure that one plot thread follows consistently after another. 
We have shit like Li Shuwen oneshotting a Beast followed by him losing to our squad of like, a half dozen Servants at best when he’s backed up by like twenty of his best soldiers, we have shit like talking about why we can’t do a frontal assault because of all the frozen heroes Huang Di has in stock that they never use and our final plan is just assaulting them outright, we have shit like everyone going wild over how Qin is on par with a Grand Servant before we just clown on them with a group of, again, half a dozen Servants tops, all of whom are exhausted. We have the absolute terrible writing for Xiang Yu and Consort Yu’s romance, where instead of doing even a little bit that could be interesting by examining how neither of them are the people they remember and dealing with those challenges, Consort Yu just decides she’s in love with Lostbelt Xiang Yu too with no conflict, and Lostbelt Xiang Yu at the last second decides he’s also in love with her and will disobey Qin and die for her. 
It doesn’t show any of that romance and love growing, we get one single flashback from Consort Yu and that’s it, she loves this machine that bears no resemblance in personality, experience, or appearance to the man she actually loved because he has the same name, that’s it. It’s lazy and it’s bad. 
And for Qin, I get that they’re popular, but I can’t stand them in the slightest. They’re absolutely completely evil to the core and justify it with tired old excuses about being pragmatic that everyone swallows and accepts for no reason. They singlehandedly drove their world to stagnation, turned humanity as a whole into less than animals (they even call themselves the sole true human), crushed the creative drive and the curiosity of the people beneath them, and if anyone learns anything? They’ll send meteors to wipe out the entire village, even if it’s a child who learns it. 
They never face a significant setback, never seem on the back foot, and even when they’re defeated they just switch over to our side, except their interlude reveals that actually their Lostbelt took months to disappear when the others do it in days, and after pulling the trigger on their own Lostbelt and consigning everyone in it to death, it turns out they had absolutely no intention of paying that same price even while they tricked everyone into thinking they were going to. They set up a system that relies on creating artificial Singularities where they turned into a monster that murdered their subjects in Xiangyang, so not only were they willing to kill their Lostbelt just to pull a fast one, they’re willing to keep killing all their subjects in multiple Singularities that are right there, over and over and over, purely as insurance for if the Alien God might win, so they can blow up history and start over as the ruler of the world.
Qin wouldn’t be a bad character if they didn’t warp everyone around them. Gilgamesh once tried to murder Jinako for being a NEET in CCC, but when Gilgamesh looks at Qin, when the man who wants more than anything for humanity to break free of the gods and take to the stars meets the one responsible for taking away the purpose and drive of humanity and trapping them on Earth, he just...makes a comment that might, if you squint, seem a little insulting. It’s not the only example, but it’s one of the most blatant, because Gilgamesh looks at someone who forced what he considers a worthless existence that deserves death onto the entire species and doesn’t react with immediate murder. 
When it’s revealed that Qin is basically holding the timeline hostage and is fully willing to betray Chaldea by destroying it if they think they’re going to lose, the reaction to this is to...not tell Guda a thing, even though all the major head staff know, and then instead of throwing Qin out on their ass, they all just sigh and move on as if it’s some quirky flaw instead of someone literally threatening to repeat the Incineration of Mankind purely based on them being a “””politician””” who “””doesn’t gamble””” as if that justifies it. 
Qin is evil, full stop, and I don’t mind evil characters. They can be some of the most fun characters in stories and I absolutely adore a well written villain. But the way the story writes Qin, how it constantly, obsessively sucks them off and makes sure we think about how noble it is for him to shoulder the responsibility of humanity, how everyone around them can’t stop themselves from thinking about how amazing they are, how people who should despise them just meekly stay out of their way and make snide comments, all of that adds up. Urobuchi wrote a horrendous villain and then tried to act like they had a point, despite being singlehandedly responsible for the death of their timeline because they crushed any sort of creativity or intelligence or curiosity out humanity and built a wall around the world, literally ripping the human spirit out of the population, and the narrative desperately wants you to think this is a good and valid position that Qin was intelligent and noble for doing.
I can’t stand that, and I don’t give a shit how quirky they make Qin or how much they ship Guda and Qin. It’s awful and lazy and it reminds me of how some of the worst things about GO are the absolute lack of capacity to let villains be villains. 
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owxanimorphs · 5 years ago
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Before the Re-read the Animorphs
Okay before I begin my re-read this is my thoughts on the main cast based on my memory of the last times I read the books (which varies between a few months ago for some and several years for others)
Let's get the hard one out of the way first. I'll start with my thoughts on Cassie. I make no secret that Cassie is the only Animorph I actively dislike. In a way it is tragic because as I've said before Cassie had potential as a character. A character with a very black and white viewpoint and a strong desire to stick to their point of view no matter the cost being confronted with the messy nature or war could have been a gold mine for interesting story lines. Instead Cassie is cast as the voice of morality and the conscience of the group which is a role she is absolutely terrible at. Because in the end she's no more moral than the rest of them (arguably actively even less moral) and her being right is more a function of being creators pet than any real logical story progression. Things work out for her because the creators say even when it breaks the story or contradicts established facts.
In Essence everything wrong with Cassie is everything wrong with the books as a whole which makes her a pretty big example of what not to do in writing. However, even if you ignore all that and focus only her personality she is still lacking. When first introduced Cassie is your typical childish self centered idealist. She puts great value on the things she cares about and tries not to thinka bout things that contradict that view point. Then she doens't really change she's a static character.
There is one redeeming factor about Cassie that is interesting but since it was unintentional I can't give complete credit to the creators for it. Cassie is a perfect example of everything wrong with Empathy as a stand in for goodness. Cassie is actually a very empathic character but she is also a very selfish character. Once she empathises with someone they become "Good" in her mind and she'll bend over backwards to justify making decisions that would negatively effect folks she isn't empathising with. It also informs how she is determined to stay in others good graces and only fights them when she can play the martyr.  Which reminds me of my wish that David had stuck around longer and been a foil to Cassie for a while because they really are starkly similar characters in most regards except Cassie has an almost over developed sense of Empathy (to the point she can be okay with horrendous shit if she empathizes with the ones doing it) and David has almost none outside of the things he cares out.  They are both also able to manipulate people to get what they want. And they read people very well to keep in their good graces or really hurt them if they piss them off enough.
But that isn't what this post is about so to sum up my view on Cassie is that she had potential but what we got was a horrendous character and the biggest disappointment of the books.
Now let's move onto another hard one to talk about and that is Tobias. When I first read the books oh so long ago I way over identified with Tobias but then I was a messed up lonely kid so it's not that surprising. Looking back on them as an adult it flew over my head back then how utterly fucked up Tobias is. This is not a healthy kid even before he got stuck as a hawk. Tobias was clearly already borderline suicidal even before the hawk thing and afterwards it and everything else in many ways turned into a much slower long and detailed decline into an early death. Tobias hated himself so he chose to give up all humanity forever. Which brings us to the problem with Tobias and that is the narrative never acknowledges how fucked up his situation is. Sure some of the other characters come close but they never fully grasp it.Tobias is in many ways one of the other great disappointments of the books because early on they clearly drop hints that he has a major role to play in things to the point where the freaking Ellimist preserves his existence by bending space time twice once to keep him around and then to ensure the animorphs happened and then the plot line is abandoned in favor of creators pet Cassie being the most important and special.
Now I love stories where the chosen one isn't that chosen after all but that needs to be intended from the beginning when you heavily lay on the foreshadowing that this is going to be an important element you need to address it. Instead the potential story line just peters out in a way that doesn't amount to anything not even a subversion. Tobias then sticks around to be a general misery magnet and to have the most unhealthy relationship possible with Rachel.
I mean I know stories change direction in production and over time and some times that leads to better stories and some times it leads to obvious dropped plot lines and a general degrading of quality. Animorphs sadly is in the second category.  Part of it of course was the real world rush to churn out the books for Schoolastic but parts of it were clearly the writers getting a bit too enamored of their pets and how they wanted things to end.
I'm getting off topic again. My view on Tobias is that he's an interesting character and one that you can pity but man is that boy fucked up.
Now let's move onto Ax the Andalite Animorph and the other one besides Cassie and Tobias who ends up kind of one note. Ax plays an interesting role since hes alien and the books do a good job of showing an alien viewpoint. Far better in his case than many of the other aliens. It helps that he's basically a slacker alien who was a poor student and probably only got brung along on the ship because his big brother pulled some strings.  
Ax is also a prime example of another time when the potential of the story gets left by the way side. Ax's torn loyalties should have come up more than they did and should have had more lasting repercussions. Way too often he'll get reduced to joke one note status when he should be figuring into things more. I don't have much more to say about him since I really remember as liking him but thinking he was wasted several times.
And now we'll move onto Marco a character who when I first read the books annoyed the crap out of me but as I grew older grew on me a great deal. Marco is a wonderful example of a character who can be obnoxious to protect themselves and despite being the other creators pet he is allowed to actually change in ways that are both good and bad so he's not another Cassie. The fact he's even allowed to disagree with her at least temporarily and call her on her BS very rarely also helps. Marco is also very realistic in that he reacts like many people would and for a lot of folks it would take somethign that affected them personally to make them fight as hard as the kids had to end up fighting.
Of course there is still one irritating thing about Marco and that's how he's often forced into the role of the complainer is wrong some times for the others (esp Cassie) to be right. It's a role he shares wtih Rachel she'll suggest the violent solution so it can be rejected and he'll suggested the better strategic solution but it'll be rejected for being wrong.
So final thoughts on Marco slightly annoying at times but very realistic and really grows on you.
Now let's talk about Rachel and this is the character whose fate pisses me off the most. I have no problem with character death in a story but Rachel's death is treated by the creators as necessary and it bleeds into the narrative abit and that really pisses me off.  She's also unfortunately the one who gets the most chaotic characterization as depending on teh writer how aggressive she is varies. Not to mention the books that paint her as a control freak. Of course you can hand wave it as the stress getting to her in different less pretty ways but that raises it's own problems with with how the narrative treats her. She's often also used as a foil to shill for Cassie and that bugs me. She and her cousin get the most discussion of Cassie's moral superiority though everyone gets a turn on it.  
And what is really sad is that she only gets to really call out Cassie and the others very rarely even though they are some of the most satisfying moments in the entire series. She's right when she calls out that the others need her to be the blood thirsty one. She's actually someone clearly sacrificing for the greater good but the narrative treats her as a blood knight. It really pisses me off and while her relationship with Tobias isn't even remotely healthy it makes a lot of sense because the others treat her as damaged and thanks to his neediness he'll never look at her as a monster like the others tend to do to make themselves feel better.
I'll make one final observation and that's that poor Rachel may have died twice in the series the first time being the starfish incident. Cause the Rachel that was split in half would never exist again. The two Rachels may have been re-merged but they had each had time to begin to diverge so what was formed out of them would be a new Rachel. Hell a lot of her issues later in the series could have been a direct result of that and it would make perfect sense.
Final thoughts on Rachel she deserved so much better and was probably one of the more selfless animorphs but gets written off by the narrative as just a blood knight too damaged to live.
Now let's move onto Jake who is actually my favorite character. I know a lot of folks find him boring and generic at first but that's exactly why he's the character that interest me the most because even more than the others he was just a kid when this mess started. You can see the seeds of who everyone else turned out to be in who they were at the start but Jake was just a kid who was slightly more mature and better able to mediate.  That got him forced into the leadership Role and from there for good or ill that's the role he got stuck with. Like Rachel he became exactly what the others needed him to be and at times it wasn't pretty.  
I mean it's so easy to picture how the others would have turned out, Cassie would have ended up one of those activist who says a lot of good things but is very much a walking illustration of perfect is the enemy of good with her probably doing more harm than help to her causes by turning folks off with her my way or the highway stance.  Rachel would have excelled at whatever chosen path she took with incredible zeal and bending herself to be what folks in her life needed. Ax would have lived in the shadow of his brother as a semi competent warrior at best, Tobias would have remained very fucked up and Marco would have done what it took to not be poor and mask all his hurts with laughter and entertaining folks.  Jake on the other hand is the one that just sort of was. He could end up really generic or find something he's good at and make it his life.
Instead he was given the role of responsibility and for the most part he carried the burden though his putting Cassie on a pedestal constantly was one part character flaw and one part character shilling by the creators. It was a realistic flaw he liked her and wanted her to like him. That was very human and relatable but his constant support for some of her more stupid moments crossing the line into plot induced stupidity.
One part that is really sad is that he's often compared with Elfangor and the narrative takes the appraoch that he falls short but honestly to me Jake comes off as more of a success than Elfangor and I wish the narrative acknowledged it. Of course I'll share my thoughts on Elfangor in another post.
There is more I could go into but this post has gotten long enough for now so final Thoughts on Jake generic kid forced to grow up even faster than others. Has an irritating blind spot when it comes to Cassie but over all my favorite of the kids.
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stormsbourne · 6 years ago
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the homestuck epilogue, summarized by me
edited after: I’m leaving this here for my own reference but there’s a decent amount of stuff I got wrong in these. I’ve tried to correct most of it. still please don’t bother with these if, for some reason, you’re still free of this dark knowledge in the post hell 2020 timeline
there’s doubtless parts of both sides (which are actually only one side, big spoilers there) that I’m going to forget so I apologize in advance for that but I read the entire thing very quickly and some parts are more memorable than others. this is also only slightly polished up from when I posted it on discord, which I did in a tremendous hurry. so pardon the grammar
please be wary that I literally CANNOT tag this with everything there are warnings for so if you’re not sure, check the actual epilogue tag list, because literally all of it is mentioned in some capacity.
letsa go
LET’S START WITH CANDY.
john decides not to go. immediately, things start going strangely well for literally everyone, who all get exactly what he thinks they want (or what SOMEONE thinks they want, more on that later. I think it's still john doing the influencing.) davejadekat hook up. john and roxy get married. etc. gamzee gets “redeemed” by which I mean john rescues him at calliope’s request and he goes around saying he’s good now. but as always there's trouble in paradise and the things that seem to be "good endings" end up being bad. jane becomes president of earth but this leads her to become a fascist dictator who may possibly be responsible for the future genocide of trollkind (this shit is full fascist racism shit. “troll camps” are a thing.). dave and karkat are in love with each other and jade getting in with them has actually just made it harder for them to be honest with one another. gamzee basically serves no purpose except to be annoying and gross. 
at some point literally all the trolls start getting resurrected because of timeline shenanigans where the black hole is spitting out their ghosts onto earth c (which is actually inside of the black hole in paradox space somehow. don’t think too hard about it). rose and kanaya adopt a grub they name vriska to honor her sacrifice and also because it looks like vriska. john and roxy have a kid named harry anderson. jane basically rapes jake (he's drunk and also the lollipop is invovled) and conveniently gets pregnant with a kid they later name tavros. AS TIME GOES ON, karkat breaks up from djk because he's sick of it and then goes on to lead a troll rebellion against jane. jane starts cucking jake with gamzee. roxy and john break up because john is depressed and also because john is way more interested in texting terezi than in his real-life spouse. dirk kills himself for reasons that have more to do witht the construct of the meat timeline than the candy one.
all of this is slightly out of order but I’m trying to be succinct so when things get crazy I can keep the relevant details close together.
QUICK MEAT DETOUR (MEATOUR).
john decides to go. he makes a quick stop to grab the ring of life from aranea, then scoops up the other game over kids, who head off to face caliborn. the masterpiece goes down as you would expect it to with the beta kids getting stuck in the juju. the betas are later released from the juju by vriska but it doesn't actually kill english (dave does with his sword, then gets decapitated), and john gets nailed hard in the chest by caliborn's gold tooth, which begins to poison and kill him. davepeta appears for like two seconds and then vanishes into the black hole. jade's corpse is the only one of the kids that isn't fucking vaporized but it gets sucked into the black hole. we'll come back to this later. john runs into meenah, who steals the life ring and peaces out into the black hole. then he runs into terezi in the remains of paradox space and the two of them fuck. 
IN THE MEANTIME, on earth, karkat mounts an opposition run to jane's presidency, at dave's urging. dave and karkat are explicitly not together but also explicitly dancing around how they both know they love each other; jade keeps trying to start a threesome and both of them are like "UHHHHHH." roxy and calliope are together. jake and dirk have a stupid wrestle rap tv show but it is iterated on over and over again that dirk thinks jake is a useless idiot who he can't treat well and who deserves nothing and whom he needs to babysit and control so cool I guess. dirk goes to talk to rose and it becomes clear both of them are experiencing the same thing with their expansion of consciousness giving them awareness of other timelines and vague control over them (”ascending”) AT WHICH POINT it becomes clear that dirk is actually the narrator+controller of the entire meat timeline. the narration turns orange and dirk’s character voice (or what the epilogue says his character voice is) begins to leak into how it’s written.
BACK TO CANDY FOR A SECOND.
jade's corpse from the meat timeline crashes down into the candy earth c through a ghost black hole portal. nobody knows what the sweet christ is happening, but roxy proposes having another funeral since the kids only see one another at funerals (the last one being dirk’s) and aren't very close. they have the funeral but in the middle of it, jade sits up and has been possessed by the spirit of red calliope, who claims she is protecting this version of the planet and is keeping watch out for a bad actor who could destroy everything.
kid vriska is horrible to kid tavros. john and terezi talk a lot and it's routinely implied that john cares more about her than about roxy, and that john is the only person she talks to. jake eventually walks out on jane with their kid but only after she’s treated him horrendously and continued to cuck him with gamzee. meenah also comes down through a hole in the sky, where she meets karkat and they hook up romantically. dave and jade get married but it’s implied to be a very troubled marriage. kid vriska begins banging harry anderson once they are teens. also once they are teens, ACTUAL (alive) vriska comes crashing down onto the planet from being sucked into the black hole. she and kid vriska have some conversations about terezi, but only after vriska hatefucks gamzee. vriska sends terezi a message. we don't see how this pays off, which makes me think that more is probably coming. 
dave, while trying to help karkat with the troll rebellion, comes upon actual literal barack obama, has a conversation about sexuality with him and how he’s not really into jade (here he calls himself “gay” while in the meat timeline he is very explicit about being bisexual). obama tells him that ascension to one’s ultimate self is impossible for the normal human body to withstand and helps him turn into a robot so he can handle the transformatiin and help save another timeline. 
btw a war has started between jane’s fascist empire and the trolls, led by karkat, who has an eyepatch. john, having patched some things up a bit with roxy, reconciles with his son. this is basically how candy ends.
OK. LET’S GET BACK TO THE MEAT.
now that dirk's control over the narrative is firmly established he actually starts exerting some level of control over people through his narrative voice. he uses this to start making people do things he wants.
anyway jade falls into a coma at some point and when she wakes up, the spirit of red calliope is using her to "transmit" and dirk and red calliope start literally fighting over who gets to write the story. red calliope wins at first, and dirk's narration is reduced down to small font where he passive aggressively swipes at calliope. alive calliope takes one look at possessed jade and runs away almost literally screaming. oh also I forgot calliope and roxy both go by "they" at this point in time and dirk+calliope spar a bit over that as dirk also keeps calling roxy "her." fun times. 
anyway while calliope is running the narrative jake agrees to endorse karkat's presidential run as dirk makes plans involving a rifle and the phrase "jake english, your ass is mine." during the rally where jake is about to endorse karkat, dirk fools calliope into thinking he's trying to shoot jake, but wheels around and hits jade instead with a tranquilizer through a window. this makes red calliope's influence go away and dirk resumes control of the narrative. 
using his regained control of the narrative, dirk presses his thumb down on jake to remind jake how much he loves dirk, how he’s IN LOVE with dirk, and how "to love dirk is to obey him" and jake, obligingly, endorses jane in front of the entire crowd gathered there to watch his speech about karkat. 
dave and karkat, drinking together after jane handily wins the election, hook up though dave basically has to shout dirk out of his head because he wants to do it on his own terms instead of the way dirk keeps writing it, and dirk WILL NOT LET HIM because dirk knows best. eventually dirk leaves him alone but only after dave basically forcibly chases him out (without knowing what he’s really doing, sort of like Aimless Renegade in the comic). john and terezi come back to earth, where john dies and terezi captchalogues his body. dirk (as narrative) and terezi (as herself) spar a bit until he makes an offer to her to come see him about her dead boyfriend. this is the last we see of her. 
dirk then convinces kanaya (using the narrative) that he and rose are in love and he's better for rose than she is and she needs to let them go if she really loves rose. kanaya obligingly does this. dirk leaves kanaya some medicine that will wake jade up and goes to talk to jake, where he sex blackmails jake into lending him a spaceship. jake thinks he's coming along on the trip but dirk assures him this is not the case. jake breaks down literally sobbing and begging to go, dirk kisses him and tells him he'll never let jake break his heart again, and dirk leaves with rose (in a coma which dirk will resolve by putting her into a robot like dave).
jade wakes up and, with memories of red calliope's goals, shouts that dirk has to be stopped, pointing out to various people (namely kanaya) how weird they’ve been acting because he’s been subtly influencing them using the narrative as lowkey mind control. they all make plans to go find dirk though none of them can figure out where the sweet fuck john is (terezi is awol). they ask jake who, sobbing, confirms that dirk took a spaceship, and then go plan to get one of their own and follow him using red calliope's instructions.
also this is impossible to get in anywhere else but roxy is going by “he” now and dirk has a whole paragraph about how suave and manly and cool and masculine he is
WOW THAT WAS HAIRY. THAT IT?
the actual ending of each consists of the following: candyverse davebot shows up on candy earth as red calliope opens a hole presumably back out to the furthest ring (after literally eating caliborn’s body). he and aradia (she was in candy for a while now but did pretty much nothing) are like cool let's go and vault into the hole. meanwhile, meatverse dirk and robot rose draw closer to a new unnamed planet as rose does dirk's laundry. they both know the planet is destined for a new sburb session in the future.
YIKES!
yeah yikes.
WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS?
if you’re like me you should ignore it and just keep doing what you want to do. have fun. the author is dead, long live the fanfic author.
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bunny-banana · 5 years ago
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I'd love to hear a director's commentary on La leggenda di Niccolo please :D Have a star as well ⭐
HA! Okay well, I’ll talk about the sections that I actually wrote so here it comes:
Chap 1
Engulfed in the never ending masses of water, he reckoned one should feel intimidated. No ground under his feet, only limited amounts of air to his disposal, and the uncertainty of what lies within the darker corners of the ocean should normally frighten you. And yet, he never felt more at peace than when he was floating so freely in the sea, almost as if gravity and the world outside didn’t exist
the fucking IRONY of me writing this while being deadly afraid of deep water. its honestly like “yeah,,,,, lemme list all the things i personally hate about deep sea…. and lets add ‘well, but theres something good too about that for sure,,,i guess,,,, ”
But what was more important for me was this contrast to what Ermal dreams about, his lowkey fantasy - and where he is irl, the icy south pole. I’m rather fond of opposing things/contrasts. 
The soldier breathed heavily in and out, but there was no time to rest as the next blaze of fire was aimed at him.He countered and evaded but his opponent was more forceful, his flames harsher, faster until the soldier’s back hit the cold railing. He was caught, and when his opponent mercilessly stroke once more, he knew he had to save himself by escaping into the cold water.The man remaining on the top deck smirked. Ah yes, he’d almost assume those new soldiers were just too easy to take on even if only for practice reasons, but it pleased him more to say that he still got it.
i really hope this introduction just tells you everything you need to know about Renga’s character.
How much sooner the war could have been won had it not been for the Poles!
While actually reflecting on the universe, i realised, it must be incredibly difficult for firebenders on the poles. like, I just assume they really, really arent fit for the cold which would make invading incredibly difficult for them. also lol, renga hates it at the poles obviously.
  Shaking so hard that kids ran towards their mothers and the watchtower fell over and when the fog cleared up, Ermal felt his stomach drop. ”No.”
Nothing, absolutely, nothing in that universe is more frightening than seeing the Fire Nation military pull up to your doorstep.  
Also, lmao, love to imagine Rinald quietly going “oh nooo my watchtower D:” 
Ermal pushed himself through the crowd until he was right in front of everyone, until he was the last barrier between the Fire Nation soldiers and the village.
Ermal has Strong Opinions™ about the Fire Nation, with reasons of course, and seeing them here is the absolute nightmare to him.
  “You mean the Avatar that disappeared off the face of the Earth? The one that nobody has ever seen and that was probably never even reborn? That Avatar?”And if his cockiness gave off a certain invitation to smash his face in, then this was perhaps a little bit Ermal’s fault.
to quote the Smiths: Bigmouth Strikes Again!
“B-but he’s- he’s so young? I swear to the Fire Lord, if this is yet another trick then-”
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Chap 2
Niccolò had always been in awe of the Fire Nation’s advanced industrial sector. The machinery that originated from the Nation had always had cutting edge quality which no one in the world could quite imitate nor match. This ship however was beyond anything Niccolò had ever seen. This ship was fully steam-driven with the powerful motors roaring under his feet. And those weren’t the only novelties.Steel processed so professionally that it makes impenetrable walls and doors which opened and closed only through quite sophisticated lock mechanisms. It all looked so modern, it all looked so futuristic.
so the idea was, since Nic had missed an entire century, the ship looked super modern to him. while its a canon fact that the FN is quite advanced with machinery, the ship itself is just to an up-to-date standard. But to Niccolo personally it seemed futuristic.  i like the idea of him being amazed at things he has never seen in his life just to find out they’re pretty common in the current timeline. 
There was not much time left, Niccolò had to think quickly. Extremely convenient how his nose started tickling right in that moment.The powerful sneeze that followed had two consequences: One, the guard in front of him was catapulted straight into the metal door of the cell, rendering him unconscious.Two, Niccolò and the guard behind him were also forcefully pushed back to the other end of the corridor, crashing into the hard wall.Well, at least the guard did. The young airbender was spared that fate, by that nice pillow the guard turned out to be, so he quickly got onto his feet and ran as fast as he could with his hands tied behind his back.
so yeah ngl, this was just copied from the OG ep
Now that his hands were freed, he opened the first door that presented itself to him, but in front of him, he simply saw the quarters of General Renga who stared at his now roaming prisoner in shock. Okay, time to turn around, it seems.
listen, i just love the thought of overconfident General Renga being so shellshocked to see his prisoner escaping that he just gapes at him. And ofc Nic slamming the door shut immediately jsfkld
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Niccolò cursed as he evaded a burst of fire that was aimed at him before taking the next corner “Where’s the exit?! Where’s the goddamn exi- AH!! A DOOR!!” He pulled it open to reveal a startled guy sitting there just minding his own business. An unexpected sight, with an even more unexpected odor following. “Oh? uhm- Sorry man! Just- just take your time! Also, perhaps light a candle when you’re done. Bye!” The young Avatar swiftly apologised as he closed the door of what was most definitely not an exit.
Fav OC so far!  That simple FN dude was just trying to take a dump in peace but who would have known that all hell would break lose and the goddamn Avatar of all people would walk into him smh.  Also, I really enjoyed the thought of while this is all hectic and dangerous, Nic still being human enough to go like “oh, my bad! sorry dude!” at this random soldier. Who knows, maybe we should bring that one back some time later. And i kinda wanted the whole escape to be funny, since its Nic’s POV, and it just wouldnt suit his carefree spirit to make this super serious (yet). 
“I’ll give you that, hiding for so long was sort of impressive.” Niccolò heard Renga’s voice behind him as the General had caught up with him. 
almost wrote “century” there but then remembered  nah omg he can’t know yet 
A piece of ice may or may not have also hit Renga straight into the face but nobody would complain about that anyway. 
yeah i just love the thought of this super dramatic scene of Nic entering the Avatar State and then theres a chunk of ice knocking Renga unconscious lmao get fucked, dude 
“Nic!” Ermal ran towards the slowly decreasing water pillar to catch the unconscious airbender in the last second, dropping to his knees in the process. That was beyond anything anybody of that age should normally be capable of. That was beyond what any waterbender could ever be capable of. And yet, lying in his arms, Niccolò looked so exhausted, so weak. Just like any other kid. Not a trace from the sheer force that was unleashed moments earlier.
I think this was really the moment Ermal started feeling real responsibility over Niccolo. Just seeing him do all these crazy things and yet being reminded that this huge burden of being the Avatar is literally thrusted upon a simple kid.  Also, this is the first time he called him “Nic”
Various noises and sounds buzzed through the air that afternoon: The loud shoveling of snow from the bow, the quieter crackling emerging from the hands of the firebenders who were melting their frozen compatriots, the fast steps rushing left and right over the ship. All these different sounds were heard, but none of them were chattering. Nobody dared to chat. Not after this disastrous defeat. What a disgrace that had been, General Renga thought grinding his teeth.
Everybody on this goddman ship is just scared shitless that Renga will roast them if they so much like whisper. they know he moody, they know he’ll blame them for the avatar’s escape. so lets all just work and repair shit and keep quite. 
When he found consciousness again, he was left with not only one horrendous purple bruise on his face, but also with a half destroyed ship. 
jdsfksajfklf OK SO YEAH, my first intention was “lmao let a piece of ice hit him” but then i realised “oh wait he’d have a bruise afterwards”  and then “LMAOOOO he’d be like Zuko, how perfect is that”   ok so granted, unlike our dear fire prince, Renga’s bruise is only temporary, but i really hoped someone would pick up the connection to Zuko
Whatever had happened to the Avatar earlier, it left a colossal mark on the ship, and secretly, on Renga personally too. He might have gotten fooled once, but he wouldn’t get fooled again.
basically, he feels personally insulted about being beaten by a kid. what a loser lmao
“Martino!”
“Y-yes, General?” stuttered the lanky assistant with the askew glasses, clenching his hands around his writing board. One would think you’d get used to Renga’s harsh tone over time, but that was simply not the case..
rip martino but renga absolutely needed a poor anxious assistant whom he could terrorise
“We need the best of the best to defeat him. And I just know the right choice for that job…”
heeeeheeee ….. no comment ..for now.  but im curious to what you guys think about that 
Thank you so much! this was a lot of fun to do ! :)
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christinky · 6 years ago
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Heartbreak and Panic | Part 1
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Part 2 | Part 3
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Prompt: I never loved you Warnings: Breakup, sadness, angst, missing person Summary: You have been dating Bucky for two years and he suddenly disappears after breaking your heart. A/N: This is for @noshitstark‘s writing celebration. This is a two part series, if you want to be tagged in part 2 let me know! 
“Bucky?” You call out, worry in your voice. It isn’t like him to be late and not call. You had dinner ready over an hour ago for him, waiting in the kitchen you finally hear the door open.“Bucky?” You call out, worry in your voice. “Are you okay?”
Running to the door, relieve comes over you seeing him walk in. You run to him, wrapping your arms around his waist. “I’m fine.” His reply is cold and short. Bucky doesn’t return your hug, just wraps one arm lightly around you and rests his chin on your head. 
Hearing the distance in his voice you look up at him, knowing something is up with him. You see the tiredness in his eyes, his face is blank, a bit sad looking as he stares straight ahead. You pull away, “Are you sure?” You take a few steps back, grabbing his hand in yours.
“I said I’m fine, okay?” he snaps back at you. Pulling away he walks over to the fridge to grab a bottle of water.
An internal alarm starts going off inside you, something is off with him. Taking a deep breath you walk back to the kitchen to start getting dinner on the table. “Why were you so late? I’ve had dinner ready for a while” Your voice was calm, not trying to start anything but you were curious. This was very out of character for Bucky.
“It’s nothing.” His voice getting hostel now, he looks over his shoulder at you, then quickly turns away “Can you get off my fucking back?” 
You are thrown back by his response. You take a moment for the tension to cool a bit more before thinking of speaking again. Something is obviously bothering him, you try to diffuse the situation. However, you can’t tolerate him speaking to you like this when you have not done anything wrong. “I’m sorry,” You keep a calm tone in your voice, “It’s just unlike you, I want to make sure you're okay babe.”
He stands facing you, he doesn’t look angry. He just doesn’t look happy, there is almost no emotion on his face. Then he furrows his brows, “I said I’m fine. Now fucking drop it.” He starts to walk away from you.
“Obviously something is bothering you Buck,” Anger is starting to overcome you, trying to be the good guy is over, “Just because you are in a shit mood doesn’t mean you have to take it out on me!” 
Bucky stops dead in his tracks. You know this isn’t going away without a fight now. Both of you are fueling with anger. His eyes are red, and fists clenched. “Just forget about it!” He screams back at you.
“No, I won’t let you treat me like this just because you are pissed off!” You stand your ground, not backing down.
“I can’t do this anymore,” He starts heading towards the door.
Your heart feels like its about to bust out of your chest, “Do what?!” You scream back at him, fighting back tears, “Are you really about to leave me right now?”
He opens the door, looking back at you his voice is not monotone, “I’m sorry, its over.” 
You stare into his eyes, they are blank. You feel your heart breaking, your stomach sinking to the ground and throat getting tight. “You’re just going to leave, over a stupid fight?” Your fighting back your tears, not letting him see how bad you are breaking, “Bucky..”
He cuts you off, “I’m sorry (Y/N), I don’t want to hurt you,” Becky pauses for a moment, you fear what will come out of his mouth next, “I never loved you, goodbye.” He shuts the door as he walks out of your apartment.
Those words feel like knives cutting you open. You can’t stop the tears from pouring out of you. His hurtful words shook you at your core. Your limbs go numb, not knowing what to do next. You start to sob uncontrollably.
You try to think of what you did wrong, what is wrong with you? The two of you had been together for almost two years, if what you guys had wasn’t love then you don’t know what love is. Thinking back you remember how happy the both of you were, they were 2 of the best years you have had. Knowing that its all gone, that he didn’t love you, crushed your heart. 
Collapsing to the floor, you let out all your emotions. Get all the tears out of the way now rather than later. You let yourself cry for a few minutes before pulling yourself together. Your stomach is making horrendous noises, you planned on eating over 2 hours ago. Pulling yourself up, you make yourself a plate of food. You try to ignore the extra plate and the fact that the dinner was made for two. 
You bring your plate to the couch, cuddle up in a blanket and turn on some Disney movies. You feel numb, no emotions really. You’re too sad to form anything. After taking a few bites you put the plate on the coffee table, not being able to eat anymore. You let your mind wander, silently letting tears stream down your cheeks.
Its been a week since Bucky left you, its been hard. Falling asleep has been tough, thinking about how he used to hold you close, knowing it will never happen again. The worst was being alone, the past 2 years you didn’t have a lot of alone time. Most of your spare time was spent with Bucky. When in public you put on a brave face, trying not to let anyone see how hurt you are on the inside. 
There has not been any contact with Bucky, not surprising though with the way he suddenly ended things. There wasn’t any signs up until that night that showed he was unhappy. You keep thinking back, trying to find any indication of that would happen, anything at all. 
Sitting on the couch in your lazy day clothes, your phone starts to ring. You reach over, curious to see who it is. Picking it up the screen reads “Steve”. You stumble on the idea of why Bucky’s best friend would be calling you at a time like this. You ignore it, locking your phone and throwing it on the other side of the couch. Moments later it starts ringing again. Throwing your head back in annoyance you reach for your phone. Steve again. You unlock your phone “Hello?” You say with a hint of annoyance in the tone. 
“Hey, (Y/N)” Steve sounds normal, not like he is calling his best friends recent ex girlfriend, “Is Bucky there? I’ve been trying to get ahold of him all week.”
The mention of his name alone made your chest ache, “Why would he be here?” You ask confused.
“Well isn’t he here, and I figured its either here or at your place with him.”
“No. Not anymore.” You are now fighting off tears, trying not to seem weak while talking with Steve. Not letting him tell Bucky how you are a mess and giving him the satisfaction. 
“What do you mean?” Panic starts to form in Steve’s voice.
“He left me last week. Said he never loved me.” You pause, thinking you didn’t need to give that much detail, “Haven’t heard from him since.” 
“He did what!?” Steve obviously didn’t know.
“I don’t really want to talk about it Steve,” A tear escapes your eye, “I don’t know where he is, I’m sorry.” 
Before you can hang up the phone Steve voice beckons through the speakers, “Wait! Something must be wrong with him.” you bring the phone back up to your ear, “He is crazy about you, (Y/N), Buck was about to propose. Thats why I figured he was with you all week and ignoring my calls.” 
You are struck with even more shock. What on earth could make him go off like that? “What do you mean?” You ask, “He, he said that he never loved me. Why would he..”
“I’m coming over.” Steve declares, “Something is wrong here.”
The line goes dead. You pulse is racing as you try to get your thoughts together. What was pain and sadness is now worry and panic. It doesn’t take much longer for you to hear a knock at your door. As you get up you realize what a mess you are, hair everywhere, sloppy looking clothes on and most likely there is mascara running down your face. Trying to hide the evidence you were crying, you wipe your face with your arm to rub the mascara off as you walk towards the door. Before opening the door you fix your hair the best you could. When you open the door Steve bursts through. 
“Wow, you are a mess.” Steve looks at you shocked. 
“Wow. Thanks a lot Steve. That really helps me feel good.” You give him a look as you cross your arms.
“I know sorry, it must have been a hard week. I had no idea.” He pulls you into a hug. A hug is exactly what you need after a week like this. You let yourself enjoy the arms wrapped around you for a bit before pushing him away.
“So what’s up?” You ask as you look him straight in the eyes, knowing this is something serious. 
“I don’t know exactly. All I know is Bucky hasn’t been around and hasn’t been answering any calls all week, and now I learn that he went off the rails and broke up with you.” 
“We need to find him.” With that you grab a jacket and start putting on your shoes. A sense of urgency fills the room. 
“You sure you don’t want to change?” Steve asks you, you respond my sending him a look that could kill someone, “Alright then, lets go.”
Forever Tags: @saturn-aka-six
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